ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 7th February 2024

Episode Date: February 6, 2024

Top 6: Clownfish Countables  Producer Jared's Cozzy Livs Crisis Recipe Book  Vaughan the Corrector  Have you been caught copying?  Hayley's boycotting something  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley Big Pod. Grab any medium cafe hot coffee for just $4. Only in the app. Ends Feb 9. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley.

Cheers, Dave. Cheers, Dave. You know, Brin Brin's on holiday at the moment. I know. Son of a bitch. We just started the year. We just, we're on holiday. What's he doing?

He might have worked. Screw it. Oh, yeah, the news don't stop. Yeah, news don't stop. News don't stop. News don't stop. Can I borrow your computer charger? Mine's about to die.

So do you reckon I've taken the whole thing? No. No. No. I found Vaughan's computer charger cord. Okay, but I've lost the fat bottom, though. I'll need that back. That would be from our Christchurch antics.

I'm wondering if my fat bottom's in Christchurch. You may have left your fat bottom charger there. Yeah, I might have to reach out to the Christchurch office. Just reach out. And touch. Sure, sure. Somebody's hand. Well, I tell you what, how good's a short week? Dude,

let's, honestly, let's do a four day week. Four day weekends all the time. Three day week. Dude. Let's. Needed it. Honestly. Always do a three-day week. Four-day weekend. Four-day weekends all the time. Three-day week. Yeah. One of them was a complete write-off. Great stuff.

Yeah. Great wedding. Oh, yeah. God, it feels so long ago. It feels so long ago. Well, it was. It was on Friday. It was lovely.

It was nearly a week ago. Fantastic. Yeah. The eve of another Taylor Tuesday I know Taylor Thursdays Oh that's the way to make it That's how you make it Taylor Thursdays

For some people were saying it should have been Taylor Tuesday I know Quite a bit of feedback on that You're lucky to even have it Existing at all I will turn this radio station around And we'll all go home. Then there'll be no Taylor Thursdays.

We'll kick off Taylor Thursday tomorrow, 6am. Actually listening this time tomorrow for your last chance to win Taylor Swift tickets. The top six. Have you decided on top six today, Vaughn? Yeah. I'm just going to take the easy way out on this one. Okay. The top six concert-specific RTDs.

Because there's a Taylor Swift. Surprise, surprise, talking about Taylor Swift. There's a Taylor Swift-specific RTD being made for her concerts. Right. Yeah. She's making the money. God, is she what? I saw it in Taylor Cash.

You know, when we were young, gather around, when we were young, there was all sorts of magazines. Every time you went to the supermarket, there was a rack of magazines. Magazines slowly falling away. I saw it at the supermarket the other day. A Taylor Swift fan tour specific magazine. Yeah. Wow.

That you buy if you're going to the concert or buy if you've missed out on tickets to the concert. She's got everybody. She's got everybody. Yeah. She's got so much money. All right, we'll delve into that on tickets to the concert. She's got everybody. She's got everybody. She's got so much money. All right, we'll delve into that soon with the top six. Next on the show, a man in the US has been arrested.

Oh, wow. Just the one man in the US got arrested? One arrest in the US over the weekend. Who's running the White House? This arrest, though US over the weekend. Who's running the White House? This arrest though was pretty futuristic. That's what makes this unique. This story over the weekend

was, or the long weekend, whatever it was. I don't know what day it is. Times are relative. It's Wednesday. So the story was this guy got arrested for driving his Tesla with the new Apple Vision Pro goggles, like the VR. I saw those. Yeah. Which, by the way, I just went on Apple New Zealand, $3,499.

I'm good. I'm good. What are they? Virtual reality goggles. Yes. Gotcha. Because I saw some flight, what is it, a travel blogger, like a travel influencer,

wore them on a flight and said, like, they're pretty insane. Because you- What do they do? You just watch things in there. So you watch stuff in them, but you can also, like, see- Could he hook it into that camera on the outside of the plane to see what it's like and just feel like he's Superman? That'd be cool.

Like, it's the noise of the plane. And they're like, sir, sir, sir. And you're like, screaming. Sir, the chicken or the beef? But yeah, I don't know if they're worth $3,500. Like, just watch your iPad or your iPhone. This is what I mean. I was like, I can also watch things on my other Apple devices.

But apparently you can, there is a setting that you can also see what's going on to the side. Yeah, right, right. Because when I saw a little screenshot of what it looked like, it had, like, apps in it. Yeah. The little squares and stuff. It does look insane, but, I mean, $3,500. I'd like to try it, but I'm not going to buy it. Anyway, this guy filmed himself in his Tesla wearing the new

Apple Pro Vision and made out in his video that he'd been arrested. This was a news story everywhere. Online. Man arrested while driving Tesla wearing new Apple VR headset. He has confirmed now today that that was just a skit.

He was being a silly bugger. that was just a skit. And he was. Silly bugger. He was being a silly bugger. Right. But it did kind of make people say, okay, well, what people are going to be able to drive a self-automated car while wearing a VR headset? Well, they can do lots of things while this car's driving itself, eh, Vaughn?

So I've heard. Vaughn, during that song, said he's seen documentaries. Small sort of like documentaries. Small, small documentaries. 12-minute documentaries. Apparently producer Jared had sent one. On a site that we can't. No, I threw him under the bus on that.

I was researching pornography on my own time. And apparently people do things with a Tesla. There's a guy whose thing is that he puts in an autopilot and... So like the black cabs? Except, yeah, except not. Also I've heard, or I've read. Those are... I've never been in a taxi that rolls anything like this.

Because what, like you're saying, it sparks a debate around what are the laws? Like what are you able to do when the Tesla's driving itself? Well, isn't there a law about having a screen in your car already? The Teslas already have the iPads. Yeah, but I mean, yeah. Huge screens and those things. And you can like put up YouTube videos and stuff like apps, right?

Which is wild. It is wild. Just watching a movie. I don't know. I prefer to have my hands on the wheel. Yeah. At 10 and 2. Focusing.

10 and 2. Yeah. Listening to Fletchford and Hayley and I'm laughing out louder. Or just kind of one hand at 11 and the other one on the. Yeah, the other one on the. On the kind of the. I drive with my left hand on the gear stick like it's a manual. What, like you're in.

I know. Every now and then I'll flick it into neutral. It's like. And you're like it's a manual. What, like you're in... I know, every now and then I'll flick it into neutral and it's like... And you're like, oh, gosh. I used the drive with one hand on the handbrake. Like, just at any moment.

Just really. Yeah, but that's because you're from Hamilton. Right. We need to do a little burn out. Just in case you hit a gravel patch. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley.

So Tinder have released... It's like a campaign, I guess, called Ink Twice, where they're offering singles who have tattoos from previous relationships, like relationship tattoos, joint tattoos, like a cover-up. Right. Like they can get it covered up with something that is not to do with their previous partner.

Everyone in the world? Or is this just a limited time offer for like five people? I want to say... Because they'll have their work cut out for them. Yeah, I want to say this is in America. Okay. Yeah, singles, 18 or older, they can apply to this thing called Ink Twice and it's in America. Right, okay.

So if you've got one in New Zealand, tough shite, basically. So they did some research and they found out that 52% of singles said they'd like to cover up or remove a tattoo they'd gotten with a former significant other. That is insane. Too many.

Yeah. So I've thought about this before because all, no, the majority of the tattoos I have have all been done with someone else. My first one, my brother got the same one. Yeah. My second one, my marching friends got the same one. And then my third one's with my bestie.

Yeah. And I wouldn't cover any of them up. I would just because they're quite bad tattoos now rather than I don't like those people. What about the last one that you just got? Kweli. Yeah. Nah. That's cute. But I got that on my own. Yeah. But if I I've never had a tattoo with

like a lover. A lover? At all? Karwin, have you got any, because Karwin's our most tatted up. You dated that neo-Nazi that time. Yeah, but she got the swastikas. You got them unlazed off. It's actually a Buddhist symbol.

I thought you got it turned into the Microsoft Windows logo. Yeah, I did. I love it. She loves Windows. Hates Mac. She loves Windows. Huge fan of Windows. But you haven't had a relationship tattoo. No, I have a tattoo that I got with a best friend.

Yes. And they're kind of matching, but not a partner. No. No, I have a tattoo that I got with a best friend and they're kind of matching but not a partner, no. You'd get it removed though, wouldn't you? Immediately. Or turn it into wino forever. Now that's genius. That one's going to be one of the worst. Johnny Depp had Winona forever, remember? That's right. And then he got it

sort of like scratched out a bit for it to be like wino forever. And now isn't he an alcoholic? Well, it was... I don't know if now... I think that's always been brewing. But wino forever was good. But I don't know if I'd ever...

I've never had a cover up or anything before. Yeah. Because they always have to be like big, meaty things. How long should you be with someone before you get a tattoo with them? 50 years. Yeah, like 50 years. Shade and I are with someone before you get a tattoo with them? 50 years. Yeah, like 50 years. Shaday and I are going to get matching

do not resuscitate tattoos. Oh, that's beautiful. Yeah, right. But wait until you're in your, what, 70s? Don't get it now. Oh, I've got it the weekend. Oh, okay. Oh my God, right across the chest.

Leave me be. I'm so tired. Do not resuscitate. Yeah, honestly, this is a welcome exit. Do not resuscitate. Yeah, honestly. This is a welcome exit. Do not resuscitate. 19 past six. Next on the show, something that was really making me chuckle

about Demi Lovato. She's been a bit, she's missed the mark. Play it. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Demi Lovato has come under fire a little bit online for a choice she made. And by the way, I did just look up the pronouns

because Demi Lovato did want to be referred to they, them for a while. But the last year she was like, it was exhausting. So she was like, cheers. Right. Yeah. Just in case people wanted to call me a TERF and message in and say that I'm being disrespectful. Okay. Just in case people wanted to call me a TERF and message in and say that I'm being disrespectful. Now, Demi Lovato was invited to play at the American Heart Association event,

Raising Awareness and Money for Victims of Heart Attacks. Okay. And she decided to sing a song of hers called Heart Attack. So, at the heart attack awareness event. Oh, right. Okay. Yeah, right. I see what's happened here. Now, the song Heart Attack is not about

you know, people have heart attacks and that's really sad. It's just a little bit tone deaf. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's been called out on it. People being like, I reckon read the room. You wouldn't play aeroplanes at a 9-11 event with someone sleeping.

Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, it felt a little bit off. But it's kind of one of her bigger songs though, right? Yeah, I know. Yeah, I know. But do you know what I mean? It's a little bit off. But it's kind of one of her bigger songs though, right? Yeah, I know. Yeah. I know, but do you know what I mean? It's a little bit off. She's got other big songs though, doesn't she?

Yeah. Yeah, she does. Okay. Anyway, she said she came out and she was like, no, it's about like head and heart connection. And people were like, no, no, it's about a medical event. Do you think she was halfway through and she was like, oh no. The moment she said the word heart and she was like, oh no.

The moment she said the word heart attack, she went, heart attack. Oh, what am I doing here? Yeah. That's too good. There literally could have been a number of other songs she did. But she's really come out being like, no, it's about the mind heart connection.

I am being sensitive in this moment. It was intended to champion the women in the room. I mean, she is there to raise money and help them. It's not like she did it on purpose. Yeah. How much money did she raise? I don't actually know.

I mean, it's a banger. Almost too exciting, the song. It could have caused heart attacks. What about her other song, Give Your Heart a Break? You know, then you're giving it a break. It's stopping, isn't it? Yeah.

Give it a break. Give it a break. Just let it stop beating for a bit. She's got a song called Lion Heart. She's got another song called Fix a Heart. Fix a Heart would have been better. Fix a Heart would have worked. Yeah, but not a hit.

It wasn't a commercial success that Heart Attack was. But a lot of songs about hearts. A lot of songs about hearts. No wonder she was invited. She's been through heartache. Yeah, but she a hit. It wasn't a commercial success that Heart Attack was. But a lot of song about hearts. A lot of songs about hearts. No wonder she was invited. She's been through heartache. Yeah, but she is a heart artist. Play ZM's Fletchford and Ailey. Play ZM.

The self-driving ZM think tank. This is the top six. Hello. Hello. Clownfish. Very cute. Nemo. Nem six. Hello. Hello. Clownfish. Very cute. Nemo. Nemo.

Yeah. Really did a lot for clownfish, that Pixar film. Yeah. So it's kind of been discovered people who would dive in coral reefs were... Reefs? Reefs. Reefs. No, reefs is the plural.

Right. Of, yeah. The Great Barrier Reefs. Yeah. The Great Barrier Reefs. There's one, there's one Great Barrier Reef,. Yeah. The Great Barrier Reefs. There's one Great Barrier Reef, but if there was one next to it, it would be the Great Barrier Reefs.

The Great Barrier Reefs. And people who dive on Reefs, surfacer, just cover all my bases there, have noticed that clownfish, they've got white stripes, right? They're orange with white stripes. They congregate with other clownfish who they've got white stripes, right? They're orange with white stripes.

Yep. They congregate with other clownfish who have the same amount of white stripes. Oh, okay. Not the white stripes. Famed. Terrible drummer. Alt-wrong. Man, please give Meg a use.

One of the worst drummers in the industry. Aww. Is it his sister? Is it his girlfriend? No one will ever know. No one knows. No one knows. No one knows what the story is with Jack and Meg White.

But the white stripes on the fish, they congregate with other fish that have the same amount of white stripes. So if you've got one too many stripes, they don't want to know you. You'll have to congregate with the others. Oh, that's not very inclusive of it. Now they have up to three stripes. That's really awful. So they said...

It feels racist. It is, right? Yeah. We're all clownfish here. We're all the same on the inside. Yeah. We're all going to be scooped up by a plastic bag And put into a rich person's aquarium Because their kids like floating Nemo Can't we all just get along

Regardless of our stripes A bigger lesson to be learnt here So they count the stripes But I'm looking at pictures of clownfish And they all have three stripes Every single photo of them. There's one here with two stripes. Whoa. So they can count their stripes

and so they're saying rudimentarily speaking they can count to three. Wow. It's such a roundabout way of getting there. They've got the top six things clownfish can

count. Okay, but only up to three. You'll find out on the list. Number six on the list, sides of a triangle. That's how triangles work. Squares? No idea. They're baffled by them. Pentagons? Absolutely not.

Octagons? Too many. Hexagons? They might be like, that looks like two lotsons. Too many. Too many. Hexagons, they might be like, that looks like two lots of three to me. But I wouldn't know. No, that's too much. Because if you can count to three, could you count up to three lots of three? You just keep counting from three. Number five on the list of the top six things clownfish are counting,

the wise men in an underwater nativity scene. Yeah. Pop a little manger and such down into your fish tank for Christmas season. If you were one of the wise men,

what would you have brought? Because mers are a bit shit, eh? Not of the original three. Probably a PlayStation if I had to stand in front of a church all December.

I was thinking I probably would have bought a mac and cheese or something for Mary and Joseph. It's a hard time for new parents. A lasagna.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something that can be frozen and defrosted and reheated at their own convenience. But sure, you bring a PlayStation. It's a great gift.

You prick. It turns out to a newborn, I bought them this. A PlayStation. And the dad's just like, okay, yeah, that's great. We'll take that. Good gift. Number four on the list

of the top six things clownfish are counting. The original Star Wars movies. I Knew Hope, Emperor Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi. Three. One, two, three. But then there was three more prequels, three more sequel sequels. I reckon the original three are the best.

And then it all downhill. Change the game. Well, that depends. Get involved. Stop being a negative Nelly. Number three on the

list of the top six things clownfish are counting. Wheels on a tricycle. Two at the back, one at the front. Unless you're one of those people that are

too scared to ride a real motorbike and you ride one of those motorbikes with two wheels on the front and one on the back. That's embarrassing. I always see people

with those. I'm like, you're embarrassing. The reverse trike is embarrassing. Wait, two in the front, one in the back. That's embarrassing. The reverse trike. I always see people with those. I'm like, you're embarrassing. The reverse trike is embarrassing. Wait, two in the front, one in the back? Yeah. Is it Can-Am that makes them?

They're a little bit embarrassing. Oh, embarrassing. They're a little bit, yeah, I know. Yeah, it's a bit embarrassing. Number two on the list of the top six things the Clownfish are counting

are members of the Bee Gees. Well, we're dead. Or for a modern comparison, members of the Jonas Brothers. There you go. That's a lot better. That is much better. Both are brothers. The Bee Gees have better Members of the Jonas Brothers There you go That's a lot better Both are brothers Both are brothers

The Bee Gees have better songs Than the Jonas Brothers Put me on record Wow 100% No I don't think anyone Was questioning you Even the Jonas Brothers

Would be like Yeah he's got a good point there Number one on the list Of the top six things Clownfish accounting Little pigs and blind mice Yeah Yeah because there's Three of are counting little pigs and blind mice. Yeah.

Yeah, because there's three of them. Three. Good. Okay. Three blind mice. I don't know whether they can count to three but I don't know if they can recognise blindness.

I don't know. I don't want to pick holes in your top six but I don't know how they're witnessing any of this under the sea. Why are the fish on earth or why are the mice

under the sea? Do you know what I mean? Well, the Jonas Brothers did do that undersea concert at the Great Barrier Reefs. Did they? Yeah, they did. They went under. Oh, did they go to all the reefs?

They went to all the reefs. That's why. Well, I pluralise it. They went to more than one reef. They went to all the reefs. Okay, well, I'll take back that then. Don't pick holes. I'll take that back.

Don't pick holes. And you're telling me a tricycle's never been dumped into the ocean? I'm sure they would. Absolutely. There'll be a few trucks down there. That's today's top six. Producers, sorry, I was distracted.

I was still reading. By the beauty. No, I was still reading about planes. Was it by our hotness? Was it our hotness? It was our hotness. Do you really want to know what it was about? Hotness.

And what else would it be? World War II planes. Oh. Oh, my God. Okay. Are you watching Masters? Dude. Masters of the Year?

Yeah. Yeah. Is the difference between the B-17 and the B-29? Okay. Should I wait until the end? Because I don't want to do week by week. Yeah, you're a binger. I'm a binger.

You're a binger. I want to binger. You're a binger. I want to do like three eps a night then go to bed and then the next day I'll do another three. I've got a lot of time. He does.

I thought he was profoundly busy. He is. And now he's got a lot of time. Is that what you're doing at the time? Yeah.

And then we can discuss the difference between the B-17 and the B-29. We're in a cost of living crisis. Producer Jared finds himself in the culinary midst of a cost of living crisis.

Good morning. Good morning. How are we? Good. Not really. Tired. I reckon we're sick. Tired.

A little depleted. Yes. I've also got this little niggly sore throat. Oh, COVID. Oh. Do you remember that school? Is that still kicking about? In Rangiora, they had a

teacher's only day and all the teachers went into school, proving that on teacher's only day they all went into school. And like 45 staff got COVID-19. We were right by there. We had a wedding there, didn't we, at the weekend? And it was very windy, so it could have blown straight into my face. Oh my God.

The wind picked it up. The wind blew straight into your mouth hole. Yeah, up my nose. The wind picked it up. It blew straight into your mouth hole. Yeah, up my nose. Into me. Got COVID. So you told us this morning you were making a cookbook. Yeah, the Middie and I are doing a Cozzy Lives Cry cookbook because it's tough out there, gang.

What are we talking? Are we talking yesterday's stale buns with spaghetti and then some cheese and then toast them up? You've got to toast them, yeah. Nah, so it's because we've recently gone from weekly shops to fortnightly shops in an effort to cut costs. Fortnightly? Yeah.

Far out. That means once every two weeks. Oh, thank you. I'm just keeping up. I thought it meant every time you got a victory royale, you were then allowed to go shopping, but you had to come first in fortnight. So do you freeze your meats? we don't get too many meats yeah because the middies are pescatarian yeah um slowly moving away towards chicken maybe yeah which she's knocking at the

door i've talked to her i talked to her about it she said in the next two years she plans to start eating chicken right did she know that she can just eat chicken tomorrow yeah it's i don't know okay right yeah um so we're doing a cozy lives cry cookbook which is basically we're just grabbing Did she know that she can just eat chicken tomorrow? Yeah, it's, I don't know. Okay, right. So we're doing a Cozzy Lives Cry cookbook, which is basically we're just grabbing all our like go-to recipes, which we keep in the noggin, and writing them down so that when we go to do our grocery shop, it's more streamlined.

We can organize it by like key ingredients and that kind of stuff. You can test it by what you need so you can make it cheaper. Yeah. So at the moment we're like planning two weeks of dinners for our grocery shop. And now with this, we can be like, okay, so one can of beans here. We can split that into that and that. This much chicken or blah, blah, blah. They're splitting a can of beans.

I need three beans. Three cans of beans. You know what I mean? Your Aaron would eat like four cans of beans. Oh, my God. He would. Yeah. He'd be tooty.

He'd be tooty, but he'd be full. He'd be full of beans. He'd be full of beans. Yeah, so it's nothing like crazy meals. It's like some of it's stuff you probably don't even need a recipe for, but it's more to keep the ingredients. You're putting like honey toast on there. Yeah, or toast with jam.

Oh, what do we need there? Butter. It's in the title. You're putting like honey toast on there. Yeah, or toast with jam. Oh, what do we need there? Butter. It's in the title. Yeah. Butter. But butter's not in the title. Yeah. So that's how we're trying to cut costs. So you're going to print this thing or you're going to like bind it? We've got a laminator here. We could do all sorts. Oh yeah, we could do that.

I say we're doing it. The MIDI is taking charge. I'm just advertising it what are some of the recipes? at the moment we've got spag bol we've got like a pasta section so yeah there's a veggie spag bol

no he said earlier tuna pasta oh that's good stuff tuna pasta bake oh no we had too much of that growing up I'd rather eat my own hand my mum called it fish pie but it wasn't fish pie my mum made it

it was far too much pasta to be considered a pie. Yeah. Yeah. And tuna. Yum. Yum. And they used to come in the big tins. Oh, yeah.

Big fat tuna tuna. It's like seven cents a serving, guys. It's good stuff. Yes, I know. It's very economic and good protein. Yeah. Tip of the hat to you. Yeah.

And then we've got like burgers, like homemade burgers. We love homemade burger night. I've said it before. No one's ever angry if it's homemade burger night, are they? Yeah. Yeah, tip of the hat to you. Yeah, and then we've got like burgers, like homemade burgers. We love homemade burger night. I've said it before, no one's ever angry if it's homemade burger night. I'm stoked. Tacos? Yep, pizzacos, which are our version of tacos. Pizzacos?

For the Mexican Italians out there? Yep, our Mexican Italian listeners. Hola and buongiorno. Well, I think this is a, this is a great idea. Responsible. Yeah. We start screaming at each other about four o'clock in the afternoon. What's for dinner tonight?

What's for dinner tonight? Yeah, right. What do you want? I don't know. What do you want? I don't know. What do you want? Back and forth, back and forth,

back and forth. God, it sounds fun having a family, eh? It's good times. Sounds real fun. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Today's Silly Little Pole is around whether or not the thong bikini, the G-string bikini, should be banned. And this was everywhere.

There was a man in the Gold Coast. His name's Ian. Ian. We love an Ian. For my father, who is an Ian, he'd love to see it. Loves it. He would love it. Loves it.

He said he was at the beach and a woman walked past him, quote, as close to naked as anyone could be. He inadvertently, quote, looked at her. And then his wife was on him for being a perv. I bet she was. And that's why he's made such a massive deal out of this. He said, yeah, I know, he's digging such a massive deal out of this. He said, yeah, I know,

he's digging a hole, he just keeps digging. He said that while it was a pleasant view, she was sending the wrong message. Now, we could go down that path of the message alone.

I didn't think she was sending our message. He said, oh, it's just everywhere. It's too much. And then, so he was on the project and then he kind of

dug himself even deeper. Dug himself even deeper because then he started talking about being in meetings and how distracting it is when women have cleavage. And it's sending the wrong message.

Oh, mate. And it's all very just, I know, everyone was like, shush, shush, shush, shush. The Batuta had a good headline. Did you see that?

Yeah, old lad, oh, these Sheila's bikinis are a bit much, said old codger who gets around the beach like this, and it's a boy in his budgie smugglers. Oh, yeah. I mean, look, I don't wear a G-string bikini. When I see them, I'm always like, whew, that's your whole butt.

Yeah. I can see your whole butt. Is it this year they're kind of big on the beach? So big, yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, they're not. They're tiny. They're tiny on the year they're kind of big on the beach? So big, yeah. Yeah, okay. Well, they're not. They're tiny. They're tiny on the beach.

They're really tiny on the beach. They've become big this season. Anyway, so we put it to the people. Did we not? Do you think string bikinis, basically, should be banned? Come on now. We can't be banning togs. What's next?

Vaughn has been passionate about this. Should thong bikinis be banned? 53% said yes, too much. Whoa. 47% said no way, peach. Wow. You prudes. I honestly did not think that would be that close.

Well, it's also like, I understand the law of having to have your coochie covered up and your breasts if you're a woman on most beaches. That I can't understand. I don't understand it, but I'm understanding that that's the way that it is. And you go to Europe and go to a beach in Europe and everyone's just got it free thy nipple.

But the butt is just where the thighs meet. And everything's covered. The important bits are covered. Well, it depends, you know. Sometimes it's not enough fabric. Dan says you do you, babes. It's just, you know, freedom. Dan not enough fabric. Yeah. Dan says, you do you, babes. Yeah. It's just, you know, freedom.

Yeah, Dan's loving it. How else are you going to get entertainment rather than watching the guys on the beach pretending not to perv, says Sam. Yeah, that's... That thing where you look straight ahead but you've got sunglasses on, so you go... Yes.

But then your tune just starts. Yeah, and God forbid you leave your sunglasses at home. Oh, no. I would've already gone home and get them, eh? You'd just starts. Yeah, and God forbid you leave your sunglasses at home. Oh, no. I would have already gone home and get them, eh? You'd go home. Yeah. Liam said, this silly little pole feels like a trap. Yeah.

He didn't answer. He's good. Dodged the trap there. Well done, Liam. Felice says, because some people work hard for their buns and deserve to show it off. Oh, great. Gotta work for them buns. How many votes do you reckon are people that couldn't pull it off and are like, well, I'm voting no.

Oh, no, it's crude. It's like, if you were rocking a nice peach. Oh, yeah. Get it out. You get it out. Brett says nobody needs to see your rusty sheriff's badge when you bend over to pick up a sandy chip. Rusty sheriff's?

So he's saying the thongs, the minute there's a bend and an opening. Very close to exposing. Yes. A lot. Yes. Also, who's picking up a sandy chip? I'd leave the sandy chip. For the seagulls.

For the seagulls, yeah. Or the crabs. Yeah. Bailey says, maybe there should be an age limit on these thong bikinis. Nah. That's ageist. No, at the bottom end, I think they're saying. You have to be 18 to wear them.

Oh, yeah. And then let's cut it off at about 70. No. Let the saggy bodies free. Lisa. Grumpy Lisa. Grumpy Lisa. Oh, God.

Here we go. You do you. This is out of character. No. So this is all we have you here for, Lisa. Yeah. No, that's good. I like it.

Stay away, Lisa. If you don't like them, don't wear them. Christ on a bike. Wear what you want and don't push your dislike on anyone else and what they should be wearing. Is that Lisa? I agree. That's her follow-up.

I agree. She's grumpy at the audacity of telling people what to wear. Yeah, there's still grumpiness. Still grumpy, thank God. It's targeted at somewhere else this time. Ali, do we not all want to see some juicy booty cheeks every now and then? Certainly brightens my day. I've got quite a big pimple on my butt at the moment.

I don't know if we want that. Ouch. Put a little dot plaster over it. Yeah, I think so. More like a little sticker. Tessa said, I want to tan that peach. Yeah. It's good for the tan lines, the old...

Butts have been white for too long. Yeah, they have been. Butts have been so white for too long. They have been. They've been looking at knees and being like, unfair. You're so close yet so... Yeah. So more tanned than me.

That's the little pile. 13 past seven. Next on the show, a moment of regret from you, maybe. No, no, no. I don't think it's regret. Self-realisation? It's one of those things that when you do it at the time, you think, ha, that's funny, and then you retell the story

and you're like, that was being a bit of a prick. Yeah. Next on the show, Bourne was a bit less funny. Yeah, no, not very often. Not very often. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. My daughter turned 12 yesterday. When you posted that, I was like, oh, my God,

I remember that happening. I know. I remember sloppy lipsing a boy in the that, I was like, oh my god, I remember that happening. I know. I remember sloppy lipsing a boy in the bush when I was 12. Excuse me. And then I had a boyfriend who was at high school and he drove a car. At 12? Yeah, mate. Jesus, where were your parents? Were they working? Busy.

We talked about busy parents the other day. Who was I talking about busy parents to? So I'm making myself less busy. Patsy probably had an open home. Yeah, she had an open home. Dad was running a finance company. Yeah, I'm making myself less busy. Yeah, okay.

I was slurping up a 13-year-old. It was at the wedding. I was talking about how, like, gross. The busy parents at private schools. It was you, wasn't it? Oh, yeah, it was me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And they had a bit more money,

but their parents were so busy working to get a bit more money that they didn't know what their kids were up to. I was like, I've got to be less busy. Yeah.

You've got to be less busy. Actively making myself less busy. She'll be in the bush. Less busy. There'll be no bushes. I'll cut them all down. I'll burn every bush that this country has to offer.

Burn down the native parks. Anyway, she's 12 and the family came up. This is the beauty of. Anyway, she's 12 and the family came up. This is the beauty of being born on a public holiday. You've always got the day off and you can have a barbecue. And we were just sitting around talking and I noticed that my sister says

performance. Instead of performance. Instead of performance. Spell it. It's P-E-R. It's not pre-formance. It's not before the formance. Performance. She said it a couple of times and I said, a what? And she said, a performance. She said, a performance. Yeah.

And I said, a what? And my mum looked at me and she said, you know what she's saying? And I'm like, no, but what word are you saying? And she said, preformance. And I was like, hmm, try again but say it correctly. Oh, you prick. Now my sister turns 40 this year. But in your mind, like, your little sister's always 17.

Yeah. Yeah. So, mum was, and then mum gave me this look, like. How do you describe this look? What? Sometimes she shows a bit of bottom teeth when she does it, too. A snarl? Yeah.

Yeah. No, it's not the time, Vaughn. Which I got a lot growing up. Don't ruck up your sister. Now's not the time, Vaughn. When will be the time? That's what I used to say when I was younger

but I know better than that now. Now? It's still not the time. It's still not the time. When will it be the time? When will it be the time? It's not the time. And then Indy said percent

and she got hounded and everybody and then I was just like I might stop doing this. Yeah. Just constantly correcting people for not saying things right. Yeah. Yeah.

Because I think- Did you feel bad? Nah. Nah. Maybe that was what the feeling was. Yeah, right. Not bad, just being like, maybe now's not the time. Now wasn't the time.

But you should always say performance, because that's how it's spelled. Is this a little- You wanted to get on the air just to make a little say performance because that's how it's spelled. Is this a little, you wanted to get on the air just to make a little public service announcement that it is performance. You're talking about your work performance. We've all got things we've got to work on.

Yeah, we're going to the performance. I know, I say without further adieu, like it's the word. Rather adieu. Adieu. It's A-D-O. Yeah. But I think I,

yeah, trying to sound posh and obviously missing the mark. So we're all learning. We're all learning. We're all going to, yeah. And does it really matter? But I think I was trying to sound posh and obviously missing the mark horrendously. So we're all learning. We're all learning. We're all going to, yeah. And does it really matter? Yes.

You can't let it go. You can't let it go. Does it really matter? Yes, it does. I suppose it does to different people. Yeah. Well, if there's ever an ad where someone was to say that or someone mispronounces something, you won't let that go either.

You'll email someone. No, I don't want the station looking foolish. Do you know what mine is? It's with an apostrophe when there's no apostrophe. And yesterday I looked in an item of clothing I had and it said like something or rather with it's and it put an apostrophe when it wasn't an apostrophe. Its, meaning it's.

Because, um, apostrophes are very confusing things. Anyway, it was printed wrong in the label. Yesterday, before the party, August was labelling these cups that she was putting the disposable knives and forks in, and she wrote forks. Wow, disposable. Yeah. Oh, my God.

I wasn't doing dishes. Sorry, just looking outside to see the climate. Compostable? Yeah, but... Are you composting them? For the record, well, no, because they go on landfill and they break down. No, that's not... No, it's not.

Compostable means you have to compost it. I'm not composting them. It's industrial composition. Yeah, I know. So it's just plastic, mate. It's just plastic. It was that Sade, for the record Wanted the plastic And the rest of us were like

We can't get plastic You can just get these compostable ones Yeah right Did she get paper plates? So she wrote Of course Did you put chips in the paper plates? There was no chips

She had little scissors To make it feel more like home And August wrote Forks F-O-R-K-E-S. Yeah. Knives, K-N-I-F-E apostrophe S.

Oh, you know. You got a dumb kid on your hands. Yeah, looks like we might have a dumb dumb. Oh, looks like we might have a bit of a dumb dumb there. She did say when she finished, she's like, that's not right, is it? Yeah.

I was like, no, it's not quite, you've missed the mark there. But then she did want to know why certain words, when they pluralise, go from F to V. Beyond my knowledge to just pull that out. I can't explain the English language. English language makes no sense.

You're lucky that she done it anyway. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. I seen it. I seen it. You seen it that she done it. I seen it. And so it's fine.

She done it. Does it really matter? It happened in the past, so it's not present tense of done. It's dundered. So snarky from us. The end. Doherty's Gym in Australia.

I think they've called it a prominent gym chain. I've never heard of it. I don't know what that would be an equivalent of. Yeah. Les Mills, maybe. They've released a a prominent gym chain. I've never heard of it. I don't know what that would be the equivalent of. Yeah. Les Mills, maybe. They've released a statement on their Instagram informing their members that the use of tripods and filming

will no longer be permitted. Tripods? Yeah. People, have you never seen? Nah. Yeah, people see them up. I've seen the phone lean against something. Drink bottle, yeah. No, yeah, people, I've seen. Yeah, I sit them up. I've seen the phone lean against something. Drink bottle, yeah.

No, yeah, people, I've seen, yeah, I've seen people with tripods at the gym. Like, and they'll do their squats. They'll do, they'll film their entire sets. Sets, yeah. Why though? I don't, I mean. To like look at their form,

but then just use the mirror, right? I sort of get that. Every now and then my PT used to film me doing like the big moves that we've been working on for a couple of years. Yeah, thank you. 100 kgs, hip for us. But that was literally to go like, here you go, here's a little milestone. But people like film their entire workouts the whole time, every week.

And they're sort of sick of it. They're saying that it's like it could be a tripping hazard. It's also a privacy thing. But what they have. Also the fact they're getting the gym as a shooting location for free. Yeah, that's true. Like if they're putting it online and making

money and doing online tutorials or whatever. So here's what they've done. They said for people that still want to be like fitness influencers that still want to film, they are going to provide something called a media pass. So you've got to pay a little extra on top of their membership in order to have the ability to film.

Which I'm assuming they're hoping no one will pay for. And so then the gym will be free of tripods and people filming. Yeah. And then they've made a note saying, and if you are to film a video while you're training, you have to make sure that everyone that's in the background or anyone that could possibly walk into the back of it has your consent. Because you see lots of those videos on Instagram,

people coming and being like, I don't want to be in there. I've been in the back of videos before as well. And you're like, you're filming yourself because you're a tight, pumped up machine. I'm here for a different purpose. I want to be in the back. And then before you know it, someone's enlarged you in the background and you're a meme. I know.

Or they've just got one second of you looking over and you're a gym pest. I know. Exactly. So you have to get like complete consent to do it at all. Right. And they're just like, they're just sick of it. They're like, better still put your phone down and get on with your training. I just looked it up.

There's four locations for this gym in Australia. It's a pretty boutique-y looking gym. And then I clicked on the PT drop down and they were all like bodybuilders in it. Made me want to close the tab. You closed the tab, have you? That's fair enough. Whereas gyms here, there are signs about privacy. Yeah, you're not allowed to film other people.

Yeah. But filming yourself, I don't know. I'm on the fence about it. But what do you just – do you go home and just watch yourself doing like squats? Squats and be like, yeah, damn, look at those squats. I don't know. It's so weird. I don't know. Yeah, damn, look at those squats. I don't know. It's so weird. I don't know.

Yeah, I don't know either. I just, yeah, every now and then just send a sweaty picture of my face to Sade.

She'll be like, what's happening? And I'll be like, this, dying. You should start an Instagram page for that stuff.

No. There's an audience for it. Sweaty, sweaty bald man. Sweaty old bald man. Sweaty bald man struggling at the gym. Ah, Sweaty bald man. Sweaty old bald man. Sweaty bald man struggling at the gym. Ah, sweaty old bald man.

Yesterday was Waitangi Day, a day where politicians go up north and... I don't know. Yeah, I was expecting a bit more like... You like a bit of a dildo to the head, don't you? Yeah! It set a very high precedent from what I expect from my Waitangi

days. And a bit of mud, maybe some eggs There's been some mud, there's been eggs previously. And I thought, if any year it was to happen, I thought maybe this year. Yeah, tensions are high. Yeah. You've picked up on that, have you? You've picked up on a little bit of that, have you? I've just got a whiff of tension.

I really thought David Seymour Between Mali and the current government David Seymour was going to At least get an egg or a David Seymour said some things And then he got sung off Yeah Now that's a kind way Of getting that man off the stage

Yeah It's like he was at the Grammys And his speech was going too long Just a beautiful waiter And they just played him off Yeah But it was a beautiful song This time around

But Prime Minister Christopher Lux Into the speech And it was pointed out that that speech was more or less the same speech he gave last year. Yeah, there was some like paragraphs that were copied exactly from last year. But he wasn't Prime Minister last year.

And no one really cared last year. So maybe he thought no one was listening last year so he was just, you know. Also, that's someone's whole job, right, is to write speeches. Speech writers, yeah. He would have just been like, I need a speech

and they're like... Do you reckon they open up the Google Drive? Yeah, to last year's speech. And it was there, and they were like, well, the key points. I mean, you know, the treaty hasn't changed. Put it into AI and be like, hey, this is my speech last year. Can you just change it up? Same message.

Same vibe. It was like when you used to do exams at school and you'd copy and paste from Wikipedia and then you'd shuffle the words a bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that they didn't, you know. Change the really long words to a dumb word. To a dumb word that I would use.

Yes. And then get away with it. Because I don't say pontificate. Yeah. No one says pontificate. What do you say instead? Think. Yeah.

Think. Think about. I think about it. I think about it. I think about. Yep. So he copied himself, which is a weird sort of copying. Yeah. Because it's not plagiarism because it's yourself.

Nah, because it's just you. It's just lay. But again, it would have been someone writing it for him that took the lazy way out. It's something I would have done. But do you reckon there was a moment I saw on the news and there was a moment where he was reading it where he was almost just like

this seems familiar. Yeah. Is this Deja Vu? Have I said this before? Yeah. Am I having wild Deja Vu right now? This feels so familiar. We would like to know this morning

when you got caught copying. Yeah, because people Maybe even off yourself. Yeah. Triple points if it was off yourself. Maybe you did your year nine speech again in year 11. Everyone's probably forgot it's two years later. Make a couple of modifications.

This is his version, yeah. Better delivery at it now. But now with AI and just all the plagiarism that happens, like unis are pretty smart with their programs and stuff. Yeah, they're sick to catch it out. But maybe even pre the programs, you got caught copying Wikipedia, like in the early days of Wikipedia.

Yeah, for sure. You were like, no one's going to know. I'll admit this here and now. When at high school, I did these music composition and music performance. I did them both. And for the composition, once I couldn't think of a song,

so I just did a song from a metal band. Katy Perry. No, it was a metal band, but in the middle of their album, they had a piano churn. And I just said I wrote it. And I suppose getting caught is me just saying now. I wrote it.

No, because it was like a weird underground metal band. How would they ever have found it? Oh, so you didn't get caught though? No. Brilliant. Yeah, I know. Okay. Well, right. No, because it was like a weird underground metal band. How would they ever have found it? Oh, so you didn't get caught, though? No. Brilliant. Yeah, I know. Okay. Well, we want to hear the times that you did get caught out copying. We want to know when you've been caught out copying. Our own Prime Minister has been caught copying

his last year's speech. Word for word paragraphs. He's busy. He's busy. He's trying to make it all work, you know. And let's be honest, nobody heard the speech last year. No, because no one it all work, you know. And let's be honest, nobody heard the speech last year. No, because no one cared what he said last year. Exactly. Now he's the Prime Minister.

He's like, that was a good speech. I'll just do it again. And look, we all want the easy way out. We've got an assignment due. We've got work due. Life's too short. Take the easy way. It was a perfectly good speech there.

Just say it again. When have you been caught copying Cobus? What happened? Hi, guys. So I had a geography teacher in high school that absolutely hated Wikipedia because none of the details on there are accurate according to them. Right. And so before big assessments, she'd actually go into Wikipedia

and change a lot of the details just so that if you're caught copying and pastinging it would be completely inaccurate. Of course because anyone can just go on and edit Wikipedia. Wow, so she'd go in and put in a fact. Anybody can go in and edit Wikipedia. Yeah, but then you say that but then it's pretty

tough now. If you do make a joke edit, a lot of people will correct it pretty quick. The person who initially made that page, they get a notification that it's been edited, right? Yeah, yeah. That is so funny, though. Wow.

And so were you caught out with that? Me and almost everybody else in the class. Do you remember what it was? What specific thing she'd changed on? Details on topographic maps or something. Like, it was very specific and not, you know, general information. So she had a lot of information about it, so she could, you know, spin a yarn and it would still sound accurate.

Oh, I love that. So you'd be caught out really quickly. That is so funny. Yeah, I mean, I don't know how she's handling AI now. No. That's going to be probably too smart for her to... Yeah, probably. Cobus, thank you. Some messages in.

I copied my friend's statistics assignment that she'd done the year before. Would have gone down without a hitch if her mum wasn't the teacher and marked my assignment and realised it all seemed a little too similar. Oh, no. Did not get away with that one. I got caught copying when I did a dance for a talent show. I actually learned to dance from dance mums

and it turns out I forgot. I learned it with one of my friends and they told everybody and I got disqualified. Oh, so they didn't choreograph it. They didn't make their own dance. They just copied a dance. It's all the same, right? From dance mums.

It's moving. There's only a limited amount of... Yeah. There's only so many things your legs can do it's like they move exactly it's like when I make a pop song

of course it sounds like Ed Sheeran's song absolutely there's only like three songs yeah I know exactly 0800DARLSATEM

keep your calls coming in actually we need to hear more of your music Fletch more of your pop songs it's been a while between pop songs it has 0800DARLSATEM

keep your calls coming in when did you get caught copying? When did you copy is the question we have asked you, Christopher Luxon. Luxton? You never know where the T goes. It's Christopher Luxton's. That's right.

Thank you. Copied his own speech from last year's Waitangi Day and just sort of did bits of it again. Not the whole speech. No, no, no. Elements of it. Just whole paragraphs. He copy and pasted some of them.

Yeah. Someone's in trouble today, eh? Yeah. Someone in the speech department. Yeah. So we want to know when you got caught copying. Some text messages in. Maybe six or seven years old,

I got a big school assembly award for writing a poem. Ooh. I remember my teacher and principal making a big deal out of it. It got published in the school. Uh-oh. Oh, no. When it does too well and you're like, nah. And they're like, oh my god, we're going to put it in the local paper. Stop it.

Nah. Nah. It got published in the school newsletter. My mum recognised that and realised it was a poem from one of my childhood books that I'd learned off by heart. To be fair, I don't think I knew what I was doing. I was just writing my favourite poem down. Don't claim innocence. You were copying and calling it your own.

Sophie, when did you get caught copying? Oh my gosh, hi. Hi. Hi. So when I was in year seven, I ran for student council at my primary school.

And I wrote a speech and I got elected in I ran for student council at my primary school. Yeah, for you. The voice of the people. Yeah, well done. And I wrote a speech, and I got elected in. And then the next year, I completely forgot about the elections, and so I just found the speech and did it again and got elected again. Yes. Hey, it worked. Did anybody pick up on it? I just had this one friend that was still in my class,

and she was like, wait a minute. Wait a minute now. I mean, you've done all the work the first time round. Yeah. Well, that's what Christopher Luxon was hoping for, I think, with his speech. That no one would notice. No one would notice, Sophie, but they did.

Yeah. Thank you for your call, Sophie. Kurt, when did you get caught cheating? Morning, Tame. Morning. Going back, I guess, 20 years ago, I was in a fourth form Japanese class at high school, me and a mate.

How did it go, Tame? We took both places to each other. So we used to obviously bounce ideas and answers off each other and test, and we did so well. That's not, hang on. You used to bounce ideas and answers off of each other. That's cheating. I won.

Absolutely. But we did so well, we got bumped up to first form Japanese for school certificate that year early. Yeah. And obviously got put into different classrooms for that and that didn't go so well from there. We got found out pretty quick. Wow. So you got accelerated and then I reckon the teachers knew. Yeah.

Because that's what I'd do if I was a teacher too. You're like, rather than catch the kid and give them a rock up for cheating, make them go through to the next. Yeah. Yeah. So they're out there, they're in a long Japanese exam. Quiet and absolute. You're just like, how?

I love that. So good. Kurt, thanks. You called some messages in. I always have an image of Kurt being up there going, ah, konnichiwa. And looking at his mates who are in the assembly just going like, ah, how do we do this one?

Katsu. Sushi. Bento. Ah, bento. You know, as they used to say in Tokyo. Sake bento. Arigato. Tanuki's cave. Saint Pierre. Brown rice's cave Saint Pierre Brown rice tuna

Saint Pierre Summer roll My very first theatre assignment at uni I got caught copying from Sparknotes Oh Sparknotes It's you go It takes Shakespeare And it kind of puts it in layman's terms

Like what is he saying here? And then Sparknotes tells you what it is. Right. See, if it needs that translation, we should stop doing Shakespeare. Yeah. You know? Once you get it, you just really get it. What is he speaking?

Iambic pentameter. Iambic pentameter. What? I don't even know what you're saying. Iambic pentameter. Yeah. It's the structure. Da-da, da-da, da-da, da-da, da-da.

That's the pentameter. Carry on. This is nerdy. Of when you got caught cheating. I have three boys. When our oldest gets a project to do, I make it a family project. We try super hard. And then when the next two boys hit that year in school,

we just do the same thing again. Last year, our third boy got told this is very much like his brother's. And Mr. 12 said, because it is the same one, we do it as a family once, and then we just hand it in year after year. That's hand-me-down learning. It's worse than a hand-me-down uniform. That's got to be text of the week.

Oh, my God. He laughed and then just walked off. We're still doing it. We will not stop. Better living, everyone. What a family that learns together. Stays together. Yeah.

Yeah, because they're a bunch of dummies if you pull them apart. Now, we talked to... John Aitken. John Aitken. I was going to say Will Aitken for some reason. John Aitken from MAFs last week. You were really excited when he came in. I was so excited because I've watched all the seasons of MAFs and I really feel like it's just, it's the Wild West.

Like, I would say that the Australian Married at First Sight is one of the most dramatic and scandalous Is it the original? Was there a Married at First Sight? I think you're right. I feel like Married at First Sight is an Australian origin As he mentioned because it was like three years ago there was a really big

season full of drama. Danish Danish It was originally Danish. If we're getting some breakfast I'd love one. Yeah. I'll go apricot. I'll go apricot. Apple for me.

I'm traditional. So it was based on a Danish series called Giftvedforsk. Giftvedforsk. Giftvedforsk. Giftvedforsk. Which originally had September 4, 2013. Wow. And it's been sold based on that all over the world. But the Australian one is the best one.

The Australian one is the one that people watch all around the world because of like, it's just like, it's trash. It's trash. You can say it, it's trash. And I sort of forgot about it because the whole weekend structure being Waitangi weekend and then we took the Monday as well, all my watching got out of kilter. And just last night I was like, oh my God,

I've got three eps of Love Island and two eps of maths. You still haven't watched the brand new first episode of Coober Enthusiasm. I know because I'm an assist pool of reality fire right now. And I know that every season they're always like, this year's Married at First Sight will be the most scandalous yet. And you're always like, that was a really good impersonation of the voiceover artist, actually. Not bad.

And I'm always like, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's going to be some things. It won straight out the gate. It's wild. It's crazy. You know how John said that the best man speech is the worst best man speech of all time? Yeah. Unbelievable.

And we've heard some speeches. Yeah. Unbelievable. And we've heard some speeches. Yeah. Unbelievable. Stuff would make a grandmother faint in this speech. And they just play it on air. It was wild. I watched so much last night because I really couldn't sleep last night. I was watching maths.

You'll love, Vaughan, you'll love this woman. There's a woman there. She's 42, your age. My age. And she meditates, she sages, she believes in the connection of the universe and whatnot. And I've married her up with like a true blue Aussie whose one idea was,

was one thing that he didn't want is a spiritual woman who meditates. Because then I've got to- Why'd they do this? I've got to sneak around in the mornings. If I was signing up to a reality show, and I never would, but I would tell them the opposite of what I really wanted. Man, I can't be married to a feeder.

Man, I certainly can't be married to someone who's just constantly making yummy treats and loves pouring drinks. Boobs and bums. I don't want to be with someone that just wants to travel all over the world. Same. Or money driven. I don't want to be with anyone money driven. I don't want to be with someone that just wants to travel all over the world. Same. Or money driven.

I don't want to be with anyone money driven. I wouldn't want to be with someone filthy rich. No, please marry me to someone ugly. Yeah. Find the ugliest person you can and marry me to them. Yeah, yeah. You know me, I love ugly. Looks mean nothing to me.

Nothing. I prefer it when they don't take care of themselves. Long toenails. Again, and certainly not a feeder. Yeah. And then the producer's like, I know what we'll do. Boy, this guy's not going to know what hit him. Walk down the aisle, be like, here we go.

And to play it down, oh, yuck. Permission, because I know, Producer Jared, you're also on the maths bandwagon. Yep. Girlies, have you jumped on yet? Not yet. Because I was going to request permission, because we've got the Love. Girlies, have you jumped on yet? Not yet. Because I was going to request permission, because we've got the Love Island Girlies chat,

the four of us. Well, you were too busy yesterday Taylor Swifting. Well, I was just requesting permission to discuss maths in the Love Island chat. Yeah, it's the reality Girlies chat. Okay, okay, okay. I just wanted to make sure, otherwise I was happy to start another chat

with just me and Jared. Well, if you want to cut us out, you totally can. Well, are you going to watch it? I feel weird that you all have a group chat without Vaughn and I. What do you talk about, Vaughn and I? As if you guys don't have one without us. Yeah, you've got one without us. Well, that's just a personal one-on-one chat, isn't it?

What's the name of your group? It's between Fletcher and Vaughn and Carl. It's just Carl Fletcher and Vaughn Smith, I guess. Cool group. It's back and forth. Wow. I highly recommend, if you, like me, want to just release your mind of any

real thinking, maths. Love Island. Bounce between the two. It's a glorious time. Jesus. You're going to need some help. You're going to need some help when these shows end. You're going to need some documentaries is what you're going to need.

Nah, I don't see them all. 11 past eight, next on the show. I'm boycotting something. I've tried something new today. Ten minutes in, I was already boycotting it. What were you just revealing to us? You went balls to mesh. Balls to mesh? Yeah, I went, well, I was at the beach. That was that band from Philadelphia in the 90s, wasn't? You went balls to mesh. Balls to mesh?

Yeah, I went, well, I was at the beach. That was that band from Philadelphia in the 90s, wasn't it? Balls to mesh. Yeah, great band. I had the beach yesterday. I was just togs. Do you normally have undies on underneath your togs? What do you put undies on with your togs?

No. What do you put on with your togs? Nothing. You just said this was new for you to feel balls on mesh. No, yeah, because these togs, I don't normally. He went without his underpants at the beach. No, it was good. Yeah, but what do you usually do?

Undies. Just undies. Under tops. No, all my Speedos. Speedos under tops. Yeah. I mean. Are you a Mormon?

I know, but he's working with a snake now. You know what I mean? Don't let the python Out of the beach Do you know what I mean He's gonna wrangle that thing No but the head's Out of the water These togs just have

A good mesh It's a supportive mesh What are we talking What brand What are we talking Patagonia No no no That's good

He's supporting the planet Yeah no It's an ethical brand Patagonia togs You can't come at me For that With your rip curl boardies Dude yeah you know They go below the knee Let's go to supporting the planet. Yeah, no, it's an ethical brand. Patagonia Talks. You can't come at me for that. Wow. With your rip curl boardies.

Dude, yeah, you know, they go below the knee. Oh, yes. When did we see that? At the airport. At the airport. I was like, I haven't seen board shorts that long since the 90s. Like, they were genuinely all right. Okay.

Yeah, good for him. Like, three quarter pants. Well, the reason we're talking about undies is because this morning, well, it's kind of a long-winded story, but friend of the show and co-host of Sex.Life, Morgan Penn. New season coming in just a week today. A week today. Yeah, because it's Valentine's Day in one week today. It is indeed. Get your diamonds purchased.

She always gives me a hard time about my choice of underwear. Now, I like a smooth. Nana. Nana. Nana. Full coverage bra. Thick strap. Nothing digging in. Mammaries contained.

And then when it comes to the undie, full cheek, above belly button, granny panty. And this is just what I've settled on as a grown woman. This is my comfort. Well, I assume women that wore scandalous underpants back in the day must have died young. No, absolutely. They must have died young because of all people who became nannies. They weren't wearing G-strings in there.

No, exactly. That's why they call them granny panties. I think nowadays there might be some nannies rocking a G. Maybe. Not for me. Oh, $800. Does your nanna wear a G? Maybe. Not for me. Oh, $800 it in. Does your nana wear a G? Give us a call.

What does it look like when nana's doing her washing? What's on the line? I know. Anyway, but every time that we're recording a podcast episode, she turns up

and I can see she's got her laces on and she's always like, what are you wearing? And I'll show her a big thick strap like this and she's like, for God's sake. So she encouraged me

to wear some lingerie and we're recording an episode today and I was today. She wasn't wearing any underpants last time I hung out with her. No, nothing at all. Because I see you've got us hot in here. She said you should take off your underpants. It definitely drops the body Celsius a couple of degrees.

Yeah, she told us to take off undies and me and Sade went to the bathroom and we did. Put them in our handbags. Anyway, I digress. Wait, at the bar? At the wedding? At the the bar? At the wedding? At the first wedding. At the wedding? Yeah.

We were both wearing big fat control undies and it was horrendous. But wait, so you went from control to nothing? Or you still had... No, yeah, I was wearing nothing. It was... Not for me. Anyway. I don't like it.

Anyway, so I said to her. You're a bus home too, yeah. Oh, yeah. Anyway, I said to her, next time we record an episode, I'll wear a proper bra, something nice with an underwire. Yep. And I put it on this morning. It is so rude and it is so uncomfortable

and I just don't understand why we're still wearing underwires. I don't get it. It's horrendous. If this is a big metal tube under the boob, digging in, cutting in everywhere, I don't feel like we need to be doing this anymore.

I thought you said you were boycotting this, the underwire. Yeah, I know, but I was already in the car when I decided to boycott. I don't want to go loosey-loosey-goosey, too loosey-goosey, because otherwise, I don't to boycott. And I don't want to go loosey-loosey-goosey, too loosey-goosey. Because otherwise, I don't know.

This is, I don't know, but can you pull, like, can you take a bit out? Or is the underwire built in? No, it's sewn in. And what does the wire do? Where does it sit? Against the skin. Under? Under it.

And does it pull them in? Up. Up? Yeah. How does it pull them up? Well, with? Yeah. How does it pull them up? Well, with your strap. It's like the base of it. But does the wire go up into the strap?

No. It's just supported. It's like a half moon. Yeah? Yeah. What's that attached to? The material. The material and the materials in the strap.

And then that's attached to the elastic around the back. Are you telling me engineers haven't worked something better? Well, they have. So, producer Shannon, you're saying you only underwire. But now they do undies where they do such good non-underwire undies. Nah, I need you know, once you're getting past

an E, I think you kind of have to go for a wire. Yeah. That's my but I love the idea that Vaughn thinks it goes all the way up the strap. The Oregon metal corset. go for a wire. Yeah. That's my, but I love the idea that Vaughn thinks it goes all the way up the stretch. That's what we made the original metal corset. I just assumed it would have needed that

to be one solid piece of wire. I'll never forget one day it was real hot and I was just not feeling it so I just grabbed scissors and I cut a slit and pulled out the wire

from both of them and regretted it. Oh, okay. Because then it just became real heavy. Well, I guess that's a structural integral. That's a, what are those walls called?

A load-bearing wall. A load-bearing wall. If you get a cheap wire, sometimes the wires just open at the end and it'll poke in here and you get the cuts. And it stares into your pits. Oh, no. So normally they've got like hot glue around the end now.

This wouldn't happen with the Vaughan Smith painted in one wire full solution. And it goes up and over the shoulder. And cutting into the shoulder. It's heavily padded. You want to, okay. So now we're wearing these big, chunky, padded bras.

Like a backpack. It would be like a backpack. A backpack strap. And there's going to be a clip above the breasts. Right. Like a high-five that squinches. Right. Like a high-height bag. Squinch them together. Like a high-height leverage.

That's cute. Do you realise how heavy they would, like how much weight they have to support? So the big line of squinch together breasts. You need to go and design backpacks for like Mac Pack or Kathmandu. I was purely coming to this from a comfort side of things. No, the comforters just don't wear underwires. Karwin, do you

underwire every day? Not every single day. Not today. No way. What was the wonder bra? Push up, padded, and underwire. The whole bang, the whole shebang. It would take what you have and it would add a whole bunch of foam underneath it. So what you had got pushed to the top,

which created that big, round cleavage look. And then there used to be water bras as well. Yeah. Like a water bed. Like a water bed. And they'd have sloshing water in it. You'd poke them and they'd slosh. Whatever happened to chicken fillets?

Oh, they're still around. They're still around. People still use them. I mean, I only ever saw those at the club and it's been a while. Look, I'm going to say, just please join me today. If you're wearing an uncomfortable bra, whip that thing off. It's too hot.

It is too hot. It's too hot to be uncomfortable. I know. Boycott the wire. Boycott the wire. Okay. Yeah. Not the TV show.

Good TV show. Just the bras. Great TV show. One of the best. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn, and Hayley. Fact of the day Day, day, day, day We've talked about it on the show

While Hayley's sinking into a swamp of reality television I'm back on my World War II shit. Your shows, yeah. Were you watching Masters of the Air, the new one? That's not coming out enough. I watched the third one. That was the first one where I've been like haunted by like, oh. It's pretty good.

It's intense. And every war thing I watch, I'm like, oh, my God. I just couldn't handle that situation. And afterwards, after I finished the I'm like, oh my God, I just couldn't handle that situation. And afterwards, after I finished the third episode of that at the weekend, I was like, I need a little summon. And I'd never watched that Tom Hanks film Greyhound. It's about one- No, I haven't seen that.

One US naval ship escorting this battalion of freighters across the Atlantic. And it's just about this intense like 48-hour period where they are in between, because planes couldn't travel too far, the planes that were low enough. So it got to this point where the American planes had to turn around and go back to America and the English planes couldn't reach them yet.

Yeah. And they were being hunted by German U-boats. Oh, goodness. And so for like 48 hours, Tom Hanks is just like... Was he okay? He didn't eat. That was the one thing. They kept bringing him like yum-looking food.

I'd be like, God, take five minutes and eat, Tom Hanks. You need your energy. He was in the middle of World War II. He wasn't. He was just slamming coffees. Okay. And, you know, he's just out there doing it. And so they were firing torpedoes.

And so I'm going to tell you where the origin of the word torpedo comes from. That's today's origins. Torpedo. Torpedo. Any guess of the etymology? Is it a French word? No, but the language that French is derived from is sort of semi-recent.

It's Latin. Okay, right. And it is what the Latin the Latinish? Yeah, Latin. It's Latin. And it is what the Latin, the Latinish? Yeah, Latinish. The Latinish people. The Latinish community. Called stingrays.

Really? Rays. Eagle rays. Stingrays. Electric rays. I love stingrays. What a lot of times. I know that they've got a bad rap because of Steve Irwin.

But he wouldn't want them to have a bad rap because of what happened. No better way to go. When they get fed and they're accustomed to it, they're so friendly. How good's a manta ray? Yeah. Eagle. Oh, gosh.

New Zealand's got eagle rays. I saw one of those that got a slightly more sort of, like, pronounced head on them. Let me have a look at these eagle rays. I saw one of those, an eagle ray swimming in the Tauranga Harbour. Yeah, nice. And just, like, just floating along. And then, boom Tauranga Harbour. Yeah, nice. Beautiful. And just like just floating along. And then boom.

When they move, they move, baby. So it comes from the Latin torpedi, which is to be stiff or numb, which is why they were like, that's kind of the vibe with stingrays and rays when they're just sitting there. Right. Kind of stiff looking. And so. I would have said they were stiff.

No, I would have said floppy. I would have said floppy. They're floppy. Right. Kind of stiff looking. And so. I would have said they were stiff. No. I would have said they were a bit floppy. I would have said floppy. They're floppy. Isn't that floppy? Yep. I think the Ladins are wrong there. You think the Ladins are,

the Eagle ones are because they've got the little wings there, but the guys that are just like, maybe chilling. They're a bit more maybe stiff looking. I'd say flappy floppy. Okay. Well, you can take that up with the Latinas.

Stiff is it? I wouldn't, stiff would be so far down the list of how I would describe them. Well, they were out there touching them and naming things. The Latin-ish had no idea. It was a primitive time.

Yeah. So then when they invented a stiff water-based explosive missile, that's obviously a mouthful. Stiff water-based explosive missile. Fire the stiff water-based explosive missiles. Nope, they needed a quick and end. Too late, the target's already gone.

So they went for a torpedo. It's a great word. It's a great word. It's a great word. It's a great word. Do you know the first ever torpedoes, how they worked was submarines would have them attached. To be a torpedo and not a mine, a mine is stationary.

Those ones that they'd anchor there and hope boats drove into. But a torpedo and not a mine, a mine is stationary. Those ones that they'd anchor there and hope boats drove into. But a torpedo is moving. A submarine would have it strapped to the outside with a rope to a centre point. They would go under a boat and detach it so this torpedo would float up and bonk it and explode.

Like a balloon. If you were holding a balloon down but it was on a string, of course it goes straight up to above the string, doesn't it? So it was the same thing. This torpedo would float. So it would come up on an arc and just into the boat and explode like that. But then they're like, we're actually still quite close. Yeah.

So we'd like to be able to shoot them from further away. So they became rocket propelled. Amazing. Hope I never see one coming at me. Well, Tom Hanks certainly saw them coming. He was great at that. I'd say that was one of his strengths as the captain of the Grey at me. Well, Tom Hanks certainly saw them coming. He was great at that. I'd say that was one of his strengths as the captain of the Greyhound. Yeah, right.

Seeing them coming and screaming out, hard right, and seeing the torpedo was passed. Wow. Worth a watch. Not a long movie either, which is good, because sometimes they just get a little long. Especially the war-based ones. We don't need to cover all of it.

A lot of stories to tell. Yeah. A lot of stories to tell. Just a couple of the guys. Yeah. And maybe a lovely broad waiting at home. Always a broad at home. Always a broad at home.

Always a broad at home. That maybe in the later parts of the war, when, you know, servicemen were joined, like, get that broad in a uniform. Get that broad a gun. Yeah. Let's see what she can do. Old Rivet.

What was that lady's name with the rivets? Tracy. Alice. Rivet? Alice? Sally lady's name with the rivets? Tracy. Alice. Rivet? Alice? Sally Rivets? I don't know. Oh, the famous one in the poster.

Oh, yeah, the hanky. The hanky on the head and showing her guns. Yeah. Hot stuff. Cassandra. So today's fact of the day, origin week is that torpedoes are named after Stingrays. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Rosie the Riveter. Okay, the impossible finding topic is a topic we think is going to be

near impossible to get calls on. Yeah, and usually we'll read some crazy bit of news. We'll be like, what? Okay, let's see if any of our listeners have had it. However, this is literally a little thought that popped into producer Shannon's head. Where did this come from, Shannon? Well, I'm turning 25 soon.

Oh my God, washed up. And I was like, oh my goodness, I love my boyfriend and I should make a marriage pact with him that if we're not married by a certain age, we should get married. No, that's not how that works. Yeah, I just realised that's just proposing to your partner.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's sort of like a post-date proposal. Yeah, I was kind of thinking like, I don't want to use the word trap because that's quite loaded. Get pregnant, that's a trap. Gotcha. Gotcha.

Just come off your birth control. But yeah, so it made me think, oh my goodness, I remember when we were kids and like even people in their 20s would make those marriage hacks of like, if we're still single at 30, let's just lock it in or 35 or whatever. And then those people end up single at 30, they're like, oh, we'll just push it to 40. Yeah.

Because you're a bit yuck now. Yeah, I'm still not into you. Yeah, both yuck. And then you're like, oh, maybe 50. My bestie and I did it. We were just like, I mean, she's not gay or anything, but we were just like, we get to 30 and we're not married. We'll just spend the rest of our lives together.

Move in, buy a house, get married, spend our life. Well, you're not married. I'm not married, but she is. Oh, okay. No, she got married, I think, when we were like 29, 28. She popped it out of the pact. Yeah, she was just like, quickly, before I got married, this old hag. So you want to know if anybody's actually gone through with a pact like this.

Did you cash it in? A relationship pact. Yeah. Yeah, the guys involved in these pacts just wanted to sleep with the girls that they'd been friend-zoned by. And the girls just liked the idea of the nice guy waiting out their time for them. Yeah, there's something quite cute about it. No, I definitely

would like that. Or, do you reckon there would be the case of this kind of happening but then the friends become lovers, like they realise they were meant to be together? I hope so. Yeah, that's cute. I was just about to say I hope so as you went to mock someone saying I hope so.

Okay, well 0800 DALLS.M. We want to know if there is anybody listening, maybe you know of someone, if this hasn't happened to you, that's actually gone through and followed through with a relationship pack. Yeah. Someone you said, look, if we're... There's a dime a dozen.

I know so many people make these. If we haven't had a baby by then, we'll just have one together. Does anyone follow through with a relationship pact? That's what we want to know. Has anybody done that? 0800 dials at Amazon. I'm a call now. You can text as well.

9696. Have you followed through on a relationship pact? We want to know if you've ever followed through on a relationship pact. Now, this is a little thought that popped into Shannon's brain, whether or not people actually do it. If we're not married by the age of this age, then we'll get married. I thought this could be it.

This could be the impossible finder that we don't get a single call for. Oh, my God. But, Emily, you married your packed person, your pack man. I married my pack man, yes. Wow. He took a break from eating all those pills and outrunning ghosts.

So when was it made? When was the pact made? So we were 15 when we made the pact and we were like best mates. Yeah. And then, sorry, baby crying in the background. Is it your Pac-Man's baby? Is it your Pac-Man's baby? Pac-Man's baby, yeah, yeah.

Miss Pac-Man. Maybe one day she too can become a Pac-Man. Following her father's footsteps. I love that. We were 15. We made a pact that if we were unmarried at 30, we would marry each other. Because when you're 15, 30 seems super, super old.

Oh my God, so old. Intake, intake. And like, yeah, we didn't want to be spinsters, whatever. Then like, we both went off, had different relationships. I had some children with somebody else. We lost contact for like eight or nine years, didn't talk at all, didn't know anything about each other. And then one day I get this email that was like, hey, it's been a long time. And that was just in the subject line. There was actually no text in the email body.

Oh, lady. And from there, we just started talking again. And nine months later, we bought a house. And a couple of years later, we got married. Oh, my God. And that was the day after I turned 30. Oh, my God. That was going to be my next question. How old you both Wow okay so 30 oh yeah so we got married

literate so he's like a 10 days older than me so he went 30 and then I'm in 30 and we were like oh you know Mary let's do it oh my god that is amazing that story oh my god I'm so happy for you. Thanks. When you'd fallen out of touch, were you like, did you ever think he was the one that got away? Or you didn't even really think of him? I think, like, every now and again it would pop into my head and be like,

wonder if the world would just work out that we'll get married at 30. But, you know, never really that serious, you know, like we moved on. I was having kids with someone else and he was doing whatever he was doing, you know. Wild, I love that. There was a part of me when I saw that email that day, even though it just said, hey, it's been a long time. I was like, oh, my God, we're going to get married. That's happening. This is wild.

Amazing. Mr. and Mrs Mrs Pac-Man Yeah Oh my god, congratulations, I love that, what a great story We're not going to top that, are we? Thank you for proving us wrong, not impossible Emily, thank you so much Oh, can we retrospectively call her of the week here, please?

Yeah, I mean it is Wednesday We're halfway through the week We'll give you a $50 McCafe voucher. Oh amazing. Thanks guys. Well I don't know if we're going to top our last story. Finally. The impossible

phone and toll back. Have you married your pact? Yeah. Like the person you make a pact with when you're younger you're like if we're still single then, we'll just get married. Yeah. And we have had more text messages in. My bestie and I set our ages at 40. I'm married now, 30 with four kids.

If I'm somehow single by 40, I wouldn't blame her if she wanted to back out of that deal. My kids are a lot. They're all a lot. But that's still not a... I had a pact with a friend that we would get married at 40. When he was drunk one night, he said, what if I don't want to wait until I'm 40 to marry you?

We've been together 13 years, married five, one kid. Oh my God, he was sitting on his feelings the whole time. Oh, I love that. This gives me hope. Six years to go for me with Pac-Man. We're both divorced and life is busy, so we decided that we'd get married when I turned 40. Why don't you just do it now?

Just do it now. Just do it now. You sound like you're into each other. What are you waiting for? Yeah. Because six years ago, you're 34. It might be tight now, but the late 30s. Get saggy.

Trouble falls a bit. Yeah. Late 30s. Keep it a nice. I married my cat man. We got a couple more years. We agreed if we were 30 when we were 21 and single, we'd get married. We went and dated other people, but caught up again four years later and got married.

Just been married 17 years and have three children together. Yeah. It's interesting because you're making this pact even if it's in a joking way you still must kind of mean it though, right? Yeah. Yeah, exactly because you're like, well I... Like there's a friendship there. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. And the idea

that you could spend a lot of time with that person. I tell you the best person to marry, your best friend. Oh, that's nice. But she's not gay. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Who isn't, you know? What is sexuality?

What is anymore, man? Yeah. What is? If you've got a pack person, you know, there's some happiness out there. Never say never. Never say never to the pack person. See ya, see ya later. Actually, I'm going to have to stop you there.

That's copyrighted. Suzy Cato's a very good friend of mine. She's already sued me twice, so if you could maybe get her to drop her litigious action, that would be great. Tell her I'll review her five stars if she does the same for this podcast. And then she tells all her friends.

And if you're listening, maybe give it five stars as well.