ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 7th October 2026

Episode Date: October 6, 2026

(00:00) Intro (02:10) 100's of thousands of free buttons (07:50) Open AI will have a watermark (12:55) How long we spend on our phones (18:45) Top 6 Names for the Russian virus (24:05) Bachelor Handbag Handbag (27:45) SLP - Do you like when politicians try to be funny? (33:00) Morgan Penn Sex.life  (38:15) Who is your work nemisis? (49:46) Melanie C Interview (1:07:30) Fact of the day (1:12:30) When did your clothing hurt you? (1:20:40) What cut your OE short? (1:27:30) Difference in step tracking (1:31:40) Vaughan's old mate interruption See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

from the ZM Podcast Network. This is... Fleshwood and Haley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse. The biggest brands of the lowest prices. I believe we have an announcement this morning. We do have an announcement this morning. Regarding Hump Day in a certain podcast.

Happy Hump Day. Which can normally come out on a hump day. Yeah, I would say today's Hump Day is exciting because of the announcement. I'll say next week's Hump Day is going to be very exciting. Well, joining us. Well, joining us in studio around 730 May or may not be related to this announcement, Morgan Penn, from the popular podcast,

Sex. Not Life that you host as well alongside her. Yeah, when there are seasons, which there hasn't been for over a year, come out on a hump day. So. Well, listen for that announcement. Everyone's like, where's season four? You're doing a season four? It's like, well, I don't know. Do I? Or do I?

Around 730 this morning, you can find out. Also, deal or reveal, there are six cases left. One case has. $5,000 inside. How does this happen? Come on. Come on. 8 o'clock this morning. Listen now for the activated to play you. That's, no one is taking a deal from this point on.

What is it in case number one? One. What have we got? 1, 8, 9, 14, 16, 20. Those are the case numbers. Your chance to call through. And maybe get your hands on that $5,000 at 8 o'clock this morning. And then after that, Melanie C from the Spice Girls.

Yeah, I just interviewed her. I just hung out with her for like half an hour. Don't worry about it. It's got all the hallmarks. It's been a very busy show. Busy show, you'd say that, Vaughn? There'll be no foot off the accelerator. The top six is on the way?

Yeah, look, I'm just prepping. I'm getting ahead of it because this Russian virus that's broke out of the lab and calls like this town lockdown and everyone's like, ugh. Yeah, a scientist has died? Yeah, it needs a name. I've got the top six possibilities for the Russian virus and its name coming up in the top six.

But before that, in the world's sexiest news. Whether it was the sugar bays or the Posse Cat dolls, everyone loves singing about buttons. You've got to loosen them up. Next, we're going to talk about buttons. The Fletch morning, Haley, big pod. So a haberdashery, which can I say, a very fun word to say.

Haberdashry, which is crafts-based stuff. Is that what you're called Spotlight? Like an Emporium, you know, a Pied's Emporium. Yeah, Dave's Emporium. It's always some weird guy's name's Emporium. Emporium, I think I saw one of those. Emporium, did we have in Hamilton back in the day? Dave's Emporium, I think.

Pete's Emporium was the big Wellington one. Right. Well, it means a place of trade, especially a commercial centre. An Emporium. Yeah, but what about a haberdashery? Oh, yeah. Haberdashry is more fun to say than Emporium. Haley's Emporium, eh?

That's my dream. Yeah, it's a business or department that sells small articles for sewing, dressmaking, and knitting. Okay, well, that fits the bill. This is a story about a haberdashery store shutting down. Now, in this article, I can't find the name of a haberdashery store, but it's giving a big and poor room. Yeah.

Because Hannah, who has a, she got an Instagram page. I just looked in it in a little organization called Thread Lightly. Like that, like that. Like that. Like, rather than tread lightly. Yeah, it's good. Good play on words. So she runs at all markets, like swaps and, not markets, like swaps and stuff,

and you bring your leftovers and I'll find a use for it. sustainability is right up there for them. Yeah, nice. So when she saw that a haberdashery store was shutting down, she reached out and said, you know, I can help you because they had to vacate their premises. They didn't get rid of all of their stuff. Oh, take all your stuff.

I can help you. And she said she might, thought she might go around and get a couple of boxes of buttons. What she walked into was a warehouse full of buttons. A warehouse. A warehouse. She said, she just wrote it as a warehouse. I would have said a tsunami of buttons.

Wow. This story is so good. She has so far received 76 boxes, and she's talking those plastic crates that you can store stuff in and stack them in your garage. 76 of those filled with buttons. Man, there'll be some nice buttons in there. Estimates up to...

1.2 million buttons. So she's like, I'll take your buttons, you're closing down. Just give them to me, I'll re-home them. And then she gets there and she's like, What have I done? They're in my garage, my lounge, under the couch, the kids are stepping over them in the hallway. I'm having an event to re-home the buttons.

She said, bring your own bags and take as many as you've got damn, please. I love this. This is so funny. It's such a funny story. It is in Auckland. It's going to be at the Highbury Community House in Birkenhead, Auckland. Where is that where today? Well, I know where the Highbury shops are in Birkenhead up the top of Ornilah Road.

This is a problem when you need a button sometimes, because I don't know, one comes off your jacket or your pants. But you know when you buy a nice blazer or something. you know like a jacket or something that will come with that spare one. Sometimes they hate holding on to them. I know. Hate holding onto them. You cut them off and you're like, well, I'm never going to need those. You've entered the bolt shop.

Just thinking about like buttons, how you need that specific button. There's a shop called the bolt shop. You take a bolt in and be like, I need that match. This guy, who I'm guessing is, riddled with a tis, tis, tis. He shuts one eye and looks at it and he's like, and then he disappears and he'll come back. Yeah, love that. Love that.

She needs someone to categorize these buttons. So someone walks in and like, this button. Imagine the organisation of that though like walls of it and then you've just got the little example button out the front and it's all done by Hugh you're sort of are you looking for a tortoiseshell

Brown? How is she going to get rid of like a few million buttons? Bring your bags and take as many as you want Highbrate community house button fest is happening this Friday. Button fest So no good for us we're out of town We're in Wellington for the FH live show

I don't actually need any buttons I might send a representative I want them I want a button. Should we send someone on our behalf to fill a bag and just rummage? You want it? This is how she got into this mess. I want the most aesthetically pleasing buttons. Because my mom had this sewing kit thing.

Like a tin. Sowing tin. It was weird. It was woven on the outside. Oh yeah. It was woven on the outside and it was lined on the inside. Yeah, yeah. A fabric.

Silky thing. And it was just filled with buttons. And I just remember running my hands through. Yeah. We should get, we should, Kate. Let's empty my spa. That's empty. fill it with buttons.

And then fill it with buttons and we get in we just move in the buttons. We'll make like some sort of only fan like a button set. Yeah. Yeah. And then put your foot in the buttons. Do you want to see my feet go into these buttons boys?

It's five dollars. It's A-SMR because the A-SMR would be good too. The buttons all clinkly clankety. And maybe she hasn't thought about the benefits of having so many buttons. Yeah. Button spar at mine. The financials, button spar.

Let's him to your pool. Let's go bigger. I'm happy to. Oh my God. Because in my pool is one of those pools. apparently if you empty it pops out the ground. We'd have to almost be putting the buttons in as the water came out.

But then we've got wet buttons. No, but then we're cleaning the buttons as we go. I'd love to dive into a pool of buttons. You reckon it would be hard or soft? No, no, no, no, it'd break. It'd break. Yeah, okay, good. You'd have to have different shapes and stuff

so they didn't all cluck together. You can do with over 2 million buttons. If I was here, I wouldn't be getting rid of these buttons. I wonder what billionaires are doing? Why haven't billionaires been like, I'm going to buy all these buttons, fill this pool up? And dive into the buttons. Like Scrooge McDuck.

Yeah. Scrooge McButons. It's probably Scrooge McButton. Well, please help her get rid of some of these buttons if you need buttons. Yep. Yeah. What did you say? The Highbury House, Birkenheads Community Centre, Highbury House,

beautiful old villa. Oh, God. Lovely. Get in there for some buttons. Let's cancel the live shows, guys. I've got to stay in Auckland for these buttons. The Z&P Podcast Network. This actually bit me in the foot the other day.

version of this because I was trying to be naughty using AI. Bip me in the foot? You never heard that. Bit me in the ass? Bip me in the ass? Yeah, it's bit me in the ass the other day. What was it? What's the foot one? kicked me this off. No, this. Shot me in the foot. Shot himself in the foot. I've done a Shannon here and I've rammed two sayings together. It's bit me in the ass or plight me in the ass. You're just having to be the show scrambler? Yeah. Shannon's got her arms up like, what did I do wrong? I just actually asked me in the foot the other day. Yeah, they shot me

I helped you. You said, what is it the saying? And I pointed a fake gun at you and I mouth, shot me in the foot. And you go, yeah, I've done a Shannon there. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I did it actually. She helped me over that conundrum. Well, this shot me in the ass.

Yep. Is that it? The other day, trying to get around some AI stuff. I use a bit of AI just to help on general admin stuff. Yep. And Open AI. Who's that? Who uses Open AI?

That's just one of them. Is that chat GPTs? Yeah. We boycotted them because. they were complicit in war or something like that. And Claude's flawless. Claude is morally flawless. There are a few models there.

Claude uses less water. Yeah, that's right. So just yesterday, Open AI have announced it that will embed an invisible machine detectable watermark in text generated by its models. This is great. So do you, well, does this mean that we'll be able to, if somebody's written you an email or a letter and you suspect it's AI?

There will be some kind of program or app or whatever that you have that you then run it through and it's like AI as if you can't tell already. I can smell it a mile away when I get an email. I'm like, thanks so much for taking zero time. Yeah. To think this out. It started using less M-Dash Zay, the long hind-dust.

It started to use less of those. I think AI's pulled back on those. So this is in the EU by the way, so it's not going to be worldwide yet. It's opt-in worldwide starting now. Okay. But the EU is going to make it, you know, mandatory. A lot of good laws over there, don't they? Yeah.

So there's no public detector at the launch because of false positive risk. So companies will be able to use this, I guess. In August, Google said that users could remove watermarks from images, videos and songs in countries where they weren't legally required. Now, this is what bit me in the foot the other day. And I'm sorry, I'll admit this. I was being a shit bag and I went to see the koalas

when I was over in Sydney and I got my two photos that was part of the package that I bought and then they have a QR code in which you can go online and you can buy the rest and there was one more photo

that I was like actually yeah it's cute and it was 899 and I was like I just don't have it right now I'm proud of you I'm really raining in the spending You would have like dropped 899.

And I said 899. I didn't put a decimal 8.99. You would have done $899. Like that. Yeah, totally. And I was like, no. And then so I just uploaded, I screenshoted the photo from the website. Yeah.

And I uploaded it to Claude that I pay for and said, homie, you know, what are we going to do about this watermark here? This is similar to people that do like half marathons. You get the marathon photos. Yeah. And they're like, watermark, watermarked. And you're like, get it off. Yeah.

So I said it and it was like, hey, homie, I'm not going to do that. You are stealing 895 from insert wild life experiences company here. Like, it immediately knew the watermark. Really? And I was like, you're right. Then I go to Gemini that I also pay for because they're better with images. Oh, yeah, yeah. Go to Gemini.

Gemini, what's good, what's good? Upload it. Same thing. I've got morals. I know. They didn't do it. They were protecting this company. I mean, they might end.

I reckon that Elon Musk wanted to do it for you. Do you reckon? If you're happy to, you know. Like, I need kind of like a bad, morally grey chat GPT, I think. Right, because they kind of, I mean, they could end human existence. Yeah, see, I thought the price of humanity is slightly above $8.99. I don't know, man. I don't know.

But I was really surprised. And I've had it a couple of times I can't remember what else I used an AI for something and I was trying to put a song into it and I was like, you can't do that? I was like, well can you give me a version of the song? Yes, because you've got to pay artists.

Yeah. I was like, can you give me a version of the song that's similar? And they're like, no. No, hon. No. Well, they're only doing that though because they don't want to be sued

by like places like this. Huge companies, totally. And music companies. I don't take the moral high ground over me. That makes me feel like a bad. human being. The ZAN podcast network. Well, our friends at Samsung have released some statistics.

Some statistics. Some statistics. An analysis of over 1.1 million Kiwi devices. And this will shock you, the average amount of time that these 1.1 million Kiwi spent on their phone in just the month of May of this year. I was comedy fest. Now, this is screen time for just the phone. doesn't include laptops, tablets and TVs.

Okay. How many hours in one month? In one month? What's two a day? I love that you think you spend two hours a day on your phone. 60 hours. I mean, dear I say, I've probably almost had two hours straight home already. The worst is when it teams up, you're like iPad, phone and laptop.

No. And you're like, yes, I use me. And you get your total. And that doesn't even include your TV screen time. So, okay, so just phone time alone in May, the average for these 1.1 million Samsung device users. What was it? A 176.6 hours. Does that break it down per day?

Or do I need to open the count claim? You might get that by 24. 176 did you say? 24. Hours in a day. Is it per day. Yeah. Okay, I thought you were going to just divide by the months.

176, you said. Yep, basically. I'm going to divide it by 30 days. Okay, because that's about an average. 5.8. Holy shit. 5.8 hours a day. Yeah, that makes sense.

That is insane. But it makes sense for sure. Sometimes you get your screen time things, even on Apple, and you're like, excuse you. That must include gym workouts. That's just over five and three quarters. That's just over five and three quarter hours. Does that include listening, though?

Like if you're listening on apps, if I'm listening on the iHeart app. I don't think it does. To the radio taking us with you wherever you go. To the Fletchwan and Haley podcast. Listen live. That's an hour or so a day, isn't it? Yeah.

No, I don't think listening counts. No. Because I've had audio books on when doing like a day's earth of yard work and got to the end of the day. I'm very proud of how low my screen time is. Because I listen to brown noise all night, so that's eight hours. No, that doesn't count either. Right.

What about navigation on the apps? What about Google? Not if it's car play. Not if it's not. It's actually a really good. It does car play Count towards screen time Maybe

No, it shouldn't Thinking thinking thinking Yes Apple car play counts towards your iPhone Screen time tracking Everything your physical iPhone screen may be completely turned off And tucked away Your phone is still actively processing the apps to split on your car's dashboard Because I went away this weekend

Yeah if you're driving then that counts as a screen I mean listen We're sitting here trying to justify No I'm not on my phone I know yes I am Yes you are And this was basically Yeah an entire way

It was equivalent to 7.3 days on your phone, full days. So a quarter of the month. Yeah, of the month. On your phone, which is insane. So a third of it's sleeping, a quarter of it's on the phone. Yes. What are we doing? How much of it are we car paying the DM?

Probably just the rest of it's work when you have to be off your phone. Oh, shit. So we're working. We're on our phones. We're sleeping. And when we're not, we're on our phone. Yeah. On the apps.

And speaking of apps, when it came to Kiwi-Sing. and the apps that they used, and this is just in the month of May, the average dating app, how many average apps do you think the single person was using? I think I clocked out at three, three or four on the go at once. This actually blew me away, 4.98. Yeah. So now... Average dating apps.

Yeah. So they're using... I don't even when there was. Yeah, you'd have your field for a hookup. You'd have your Tinder and your hinge, maybe, and your Bumble. Okay, so the top five data. Tinder, hinge, bumble, Badoo, Badoosh. Badoo and feel.

Boodsie. Is this New Zealand? Grinder's not in New Zealand. No, Grindr is not even in the... Oh, Gaze, pull your socks up and get back on the air. Yeah, but fields like grind are kind of for the straits. Fields a bit more... And like open monogamy and E&M.

What was that one called B-D-U-D-O-O? B-D-O. So the average... amount of time that people spent when they opened up the app the average session on Tinder 73 seconds just to realize how bad life is

here in New Zealand. It's so grim. I don't know if that's checking some messages having a little swipe and giving up, but 73 seconds. The average Kiwi opens Tinder on average four times a day and the average time spent 73 seconds. So

fascinating, fascinating insights. Just from the month of May alone on 1.1 million Samsung devices here in New Zealand. Insane. So what should we do, Fletch? Go to go for a walk. Look up. Yeah. Yep.

Although you pretty need the map if you go for a walk. I don't know. I'm lost. Yeah. I'm lost. I don't know I'm listening to. So I've got to open it up. Yeah.

And then while you're there, check Instagram. I'm going to rule dog in life. If I'm opening up the phone, I've got to see Instagram. I posted a reel yesterday. How's it doing? How's it doing? Yep. Look at the comments.

Emails. Get into a comments hole because someone said one bad thing. Yeah, someone said one bad thing out of 100 nice things. And then you're looking at their profile. You're like, who you need to judge? Who's your mother? Put up your... Send that to my mother. I'll FaceTime her. We'll discuss it for a bit. Yeah. And then Patsy's going to tick up some screen time finding them and letting them have it.

I haven't even left the driveway at this point. So the walks cancelled. I'm tired now. I'm on my phone. And so just go back on the couch on your phone. It feels good there. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play Zatems, Fletchworn and Haley. From the unmoderated comment section, this is the Top Six. Yes, today's Top Six comes with its own background music.

Fletch, hit it. I think we're going to squat low and do that crazy Russian kick thing. I used to be able to do that. I'd dare and try it with my hip flexes at the moment. Have you ever seen Russian ballet, the male Russian ballet? Their bodies do things that shouldn't. It's borderline superpower. So crazy.

I'm just going to loop that. They start them in a young age and like... They don't eat and they beat the shit out of them. Well, it works. Well, they're incredible dancers. I mean, there's no doubt about it. You know, extreme pressure on children. It does work.

It does work. You get some great immediate results. Long term? Yeah, I know, but I'm just watching the dance. Yeah, I want the dance. If the dance is the goal, I couldn't give a shit. What happens to them when they turn three? No.

I don't know you. Well, I've been told to calm down because I've asked what we know about the Russian plague. and Google's AIO viewers said, whoa, there's no confirmed Russian virus or plague. The global concern is triggered by an unexplained death of a Siberian anti-plag lab worker that died from severe pneumonia in October, 26. AI's covering up.

Yeah, I mean, Russia's covering up. Absolutely right. Well, that was what. Here we go again. Russia's public health watchdog, Rosbittrenbansi, you know. I believed it. Stated tests showed no microorganisms related to her

200 of their close contacts, replaced under medical observation as a precaution. You can certainly trust the Russian government when it comes to a statement, that's for sure. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Brother, come on, comrade. Trust me, trust me. Come to cottage, comrade.

No, I don't like, come to cottage, I'll give you Russian blag. I'll give you attention of Russian blake. Well, I got the Trump's next names to the Russian virus. Number six on the list. The Moscow. I'm at Moscow.

Moskoff. The Moskhov. Moskhov. That was really good. Really good, though. Number... They probably should have been number one, actually. Dude, you wait.

Just wait for number one. Number one I am especially proud of. Oh, okay. Wow, okay. Headlining. Headline. I'm especially proud of, um... A couple of them might need explaining.

No? Depending on how... Expectations are high. One won't need explaining. If you don't get one, then that's on you. Okay. Moscoff. Five on the list of the top six names of the Russian virus.

Rass. Putum. Puteum? Rair. Why didn't you say Rass? Sputum. Yeah, you hit Puteum. Yeah, had the Pudin too hard. Yeah. Rass.

No. Rast. Sputum. You'll bring on number one. Yeah, no, one's going to be real good. Because Sputon, you know, like the spue. The splimmy. No, you should just go with Spue because you're spue when you suck. Oh, I was going for Sputum. SPU.

No, I don't want to have. Sputum. Sputums would you? No, it's not. It's taking three people to explain that one. Okay. Number four on the list, let's move on because this happened in Siberian. Number four is, on the top six names of the Russian virus, a Siberian husky voice.

Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's a husky. Yeah. Shit, six was good and one's going to be. No, no, no, no, no. I'm really, I'm stoked with number three on the list of the top six names of the Russian virus. Tchaikovsky.

Yeah. He's back. He's back. He's back. That probably should have been number one. No, no, no, number one's good, man. Tchaikovsky. Chikovsky.

Number two on the list of the top six names of the Russian virus. The Kalashnan cough. Yeah, it's good, but a lot of, a lot relying on the cough. Because it's a Russian gun. Kind of using that joke again and again. Yeah, cough. Yeah, and Moss cough. But number one, one's going to have coughing.

Number one won't have coughing. Number one's going to be good. Number one on the list of the two. top six names of the Russian virus. Lenin fluenza. Lenin fluenza. It's all right. Lenin. Lenin. I was expecting more, but it was still good.

I would put that at six. Good start. Yeah. I would put six at one. Six at one and one at six. Yeah. Really good. Really good. Tchaikovsky. Tchaikovsky.

But of course, nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about. And calm do. But I have just, we have decided our bubble last night at the dinner table. We just sold our wobble. Have you? Are we in it? Well, we have to be, because we'll be a central service.

No, but you choose it too, even if we didn't have to. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you both bring such wonderful survival skills to the end of the end. Cockitales. Excuse me, we had the best cocktails in lockdown last time. And vibes. Yeah. Just survive.

Oh, you want to be all miserable in your bubble? Making sourdough? Oh. I'm a making sourdough. Wait, sourdough is the good bread. Our bubble is like 10 people big. I want facacia. No, I don't want orgies. There's matured.

The world's going to end. We're not having orgies. You're going to die orgulous. That's how you get Lillin influenza. Lennin influenza. Yeah, that's good stuff. That's good stuff. That's today's top six. Play Z-Ns. Fleshhorn and Haley. I want to talk about something ripping in out of Australia. I don't know if it's ever going to make it here.

Surely. I go over enough. What is it? Well, Woolworths has dropped a bachelor's handbag. Handbag Like a purse It's an actual bag It's a Described as a

$10 reusable cooler So it's just like an insulated bag So it'll keep things hot If you put them in hot It'll keep you But it's also You could chuck a couple of bruskees in it And head down the beach

Well you could chuck your bachelor's handbag In there and go to the beach Yeah Perfect But I could take this to town right With my wallet and ID And party darts And a lighter

And you know You could You totally Or not? Yeah. Do you know it would be so cool to like do a red carpet? You know, like an Aussie, like Margot Robbie or whoever, like in a famous Aussie or Kiwi. It's certainly, it's surely only a matter of time.

I saw this pop up on the old Reels algorithm at the weekend and I wasn't sure if it was legit or not, but it is actually legit. Here's, this man is holding a bachelor's handbag and here is the actual handbag. That rules. Our bachelor's handbags look different. Yeah, they do actually. like yellow it says country style roast chicken. Well I actually do the free range one. I do the green one, the white one.

Yeah. Even when I, even when I Bachelorses, thank you. Thank you. You can't really taste it. They're small though. Yeah. I'm going to pump up those breasts a bit more but I get it that they were happier in the long run. So here's, because I Googled the Woolworth's Bachelor's Handbag

handbag and it said, you know, it's flying off the shelves. Woolworths have released an official statement. They're embracing the iconic nickname for the famous roast chook. By releasing a Limith edition reusable bachelor's handbag and then it's like on Wednesday the 14th of October you can pick it up oh it's going to be massive everybody's going crazy

but controversy Controversy Why is it controversy? Some controversy Because does this look familiar? Yeah Oh someone's made one Someone's been making them for years

Have they? So they've been cleaning out and reusing them No I'm sorry So she's actually She actually makes them from the actual bachelor's hand It's not sturdy enough. I wouldn't have thought so either. This one they're releasing is like insulated and a bit more sturdy, but she's been making

them for years. Vanessa does art as her Instagram handle. She does lots of like repurposing effectively junk and rubbish that would otherwise end up in landfill. Love. And she creates fashion items and like wearable art and stuff out of it. And people were in the comments being like, I'm kind of torn because they're saying credit with credits due. She's been doing this for years.

But she could only do it because. Because they made the bags in the first place. So they own the IP of the bag. She was creating something out of what would have been rubbish. They've created something. It's a evolution of it. I don't think you own it. No.

I think she owns it. The idea is great, but the idea is not so far-fetched to make a handbag into a handbag. Oh my God. They're brilliant. If they sold them here, they would 100% sell out. 100%. It's so good.

They're going to be in store and online for $10 in Australia. so if for our Australian are in like three weeks. They're going to be gone by then. Don't be so stupid. Should I see my brother today? It's his birthday. On his birthday.

No, it's not out yet. Wednesday the 14th of October. Well, if we've got any podcast Australian listeners, if you can get your hands on one of these, we'd bloody love one. We'd love one. The ZM Podcast Network play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley.

Flea fun and Hayley. The little poll today is do you like when politicians try to be be funny online. I mean, they're trying to get that, that unobtainable youth vote with a little bit of social media content. That's hard.

Because that's right. Because if you see Christopher Loxon trying to be relatable to the youth, you're instantly swayed to vote for him. Oh, 100%. I've jumped chips. It just works the other way most of the time, eh?

Like, it's so cringy. Just don't even bother. But also you can't win. Yeah. If you come across too serious, people are like, you're boring. If you try to be funny, people are like you're cringe.

I mean, I do feel for them. Could you imagine, like, back in the day, if someone walked into Prime Minister Helen Clark, and they're like, just want you to do the social media trench. You'd say, pass off. I'm too busy. She'd be like, that's bloody stupid. It's a great chance for your whip at your Helen Clark.

I've not done it for a while. It's been a while, yeah. But it's great. We love the artists. No, I've got to work on it's gone. Work on a bit of Helen. Yeah. She wouldn't have.

She wouldn't have. She wouldn't of. I just feel like, no, it's okay. No, I'm... Moldoon. Moldoon. We need you to do a dance. Ray off.

He would have punched you. He's having a couple of whiskies. Do you like when politicians try to be funny online? A resounding 84% of people said no. Yeah. 16% said yes. Hopefully we hear from them. I mean, the hit rate is low for funny,

but slightly shocked by the answers of this poll, says Sophie. Yeah. I'm not at all, Sophie. I'm not surprised at all. Oh, geez, people don't like a laugh. If it's politics that serious in New Zealand, said Rachel. No inadvertently, the funniest our politicians are is when they're absolutely not trying to be.

Yeah, like it's actually more funny when Chris Luxon's trying to be funny. Yes, and it's funny like when Chippy said, like, go out and spread your legs. We laugh at him, he laughs on himself, now we're happy. Their mistakes are funny. Yeah. Jessica said, leave the comedy to the comedians that undermines voters to try and make light of important issues that directly affect us. Oh, serious, Sally.

you. J.S. says it is just so cringe. Just so cringe. Aish says, I just wanted to say that I don't have any politicians in my feed so I can't contribute to this poll. I imagine I wouldn't be phased by it. I'd probably skip it or click not interested, but I can't know for sure

but thanks. You're welcome. Thanks for participating anyway in the bar. Another Ash says, yeah, watching them try is what makes it funny. Yeah. So we're laughing at them, not with them. Yeah. Is the situation here, I think? Is that

going to make you want to vote for them? No. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Joanne said, no, stay in your lane and leave the comedy to Haley. Thank you. Do you remember... Then that means you're not allowed to do politics. I don't ever anyway.

Do you remember when we had David Seymour on... Have you been paying attention? Yeah. And so he was coming on to a show, knowing it's going to be roasted by five professional comedians. He had hired a writer to arm him with... quips for each of the panel that were on and it was so clunky yeah it was so bad

it was like it was so self it was like so prepared do you know what's also funny is within the comedy industry no one's owned up to being the writer that did that because all the comedians like who did it like no one cares but just be like who wrote the jokes from me was like no me really still a secret I don't know that no one had never worked about it's brilliant still a secret it's so good I feel like that needs to be some kind of

spin-off investigates yeah which comedian armed this politician with jokes. Michael said absolutely not. If they're dry in person, don't even try to have a personality online. Right. P.S., we also know it's some Gen Z social media intern. You're not paying much, not you, coming up

with the ideas. Exactly, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Somebody said, anonymous. I voted no, but I'm actually biased. If it's cis, Chloe or Tamara, I'll laugh. Asimera or Luxen try to be funny, I'll get a huge ick. So your political bias

really sets you against finding anybody's content good. But it's an age thing too. Like Tamara and Chloe are both from a young generation. I've never seen Chloe try to be funny on social media. No. She's just tries to be like hot and modern. Sexing. No, Haley.

Beautiful. No, Haley. And really great policies. Here we go. Policy. Only if they get successfully funny online, says Kendall. Get out and spread your legs. New Zealand was pretty funny.

But I know that it wasn't done intentionally. Yeah. So again, unintentional funniness. I'm Felicity said I don't need them to be cool I just need them to make cheese cheaper Yeah that's what we want Cheaper cheese

And 91 Have we had word on any cheese A 91? Cheese in 91 Well I know in their first leaders debate last night They talked a lot about fuel And the price and cost of living So I guess cheese comes under that

Cheese fits under that bill Yeah Cheese cheese Do you like when politicians Try to be funny in line Is today silly little pollen 84% of you said no thanks The ZDM Podcast Network

ZM's Fletchborn and Haley. People have been endlessly asking, haven't they? They've been asking Vonn. Twice. They've been asked, Fletch twice. Once I was like, hang on, hang on, the second time, is there going to be more sex dot life? Well, finally, we can announce, and by we I mean, me and Morgan, who's in studio. Hello?

Sex dot life season four. Morgan, is it happening? And said people ask twice, but people have, because I will be either with both of you or individually out with you, and people will ask you all that time. We get DM'd, I would say, weekly, definitely, multiple times a week. Yeah, I mean, people are hungry for it. And we're not here to deprive people. No, we're not.

Of pleasure. And so you may have seen there was a little like tease on social media coming soon, but do you want to say the date? Yeah. The drop of the first episode. So today's hump day. And it's coming out next hump day. A week.

So a week today? You only have to wait a week. Wow. Okay. for episode one. We're coming fast. We are. So Wednesday the 14th of October,

the first episode of Sex. Dot Life will be out. You got it, baby. Now, so for those that haven't listened to Sex. Dot Life, season one, Morgan went to an underground sex school

in rural New Zealand. We followed that. Season two, Morgan went out and found what else was out in New Zealand. I just wanted to know what people were doing when some people were at home with their kids. What were the other people doing for fun? Yeah, and so Morgan found it and did it all herself.

Yes, some of it not fun. Now, last year we followed your journey trying to find love from the first time you ever felt feelings for a boy to where we left things on a bit of a cliffhanger. Unsuccessful in love. Very unsuccessful in love. And season four is about Vaughn trying things. Yeah.

Yep. Yeah. French vanilla ice cream, for example. I'm going to try French vanilla ice cream. This time he's putting a bit of sauce on. on it. Oh, I thought he was having sprinkles. Yeah, and sprinkle sometimes. I'm speaking literally, turn on, you know, there's no...

I don't think people would listen to that, but season four is actually about... Finding... Well, it's still my quest for love. I can't... Am I allowed to say? No. Well, I think we can tease that Morgan, if you missed the end of season three, you should listen to it because I think it connects well, right? Yeah. To season four, but you did not find the love you were hoping for in season three. I found a lot of fun

and pleasure. But let's just say all the hot boys and girls that are DMing my Instagram you can stop. Wow, okay. She's celibate. She's never doing it again. Season 4 is no sex at life.

Yeah, for sure. And a lot's happened in both of our lives so we're really divulging in this season. Isn't it? I feel like you and I have decided to be like yeah, all right. We're bearing it all on a different leaps. level. Morgan Rangman was like, so post-breakup, season four, can you talk about everything that you've done since post-breakup?

And I was like, how many episodes do we have? I was like, yeah, to put a bit of it in my show, but there's some I've saved for podcast only. Oh, this is good. Because I couldn't say it live on stage. But yeah, it's so good to be back in the room of sex. Dot Life and like, we just love our listeners so much. Oh, my God.

The reason why this season is so late is because I have got vulnerability hang after every season. We overshare. Yeah. It's important. Like if you're coming along and investing as listeners, you get it all.

You should get Fletch in for an episode. No holds bad. Fletch. I think we're okay. Fletch tells all. You watch your ratings go, whew- Well, Fletch was a character of season three.

Exactly. For sure, when you came to the rescue. I popped up. Yeah. Yeah. Came and got my morning after pill with me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the pharmacist is like,

this guy? This loser? This loser? You're wasting your time with her. No, there's going to be lots of naughtiness in season four. It's going to be very exciting. And you only have to wait a week. Yeah, it's not fine to wait a week today, the very first episode.

And then it'll be weekly every hump day on the Wednesday. And there's a bit of a twist as well because obviously every, if you don't know, we do home play, which at the end of every episode, Morgan gives us a task. But this season, Morgan will also be partaking in some tasks. Oh, okay. Which I didn't realize. She didn't realize. Actually, Haley just sprung that on me.

She thought after three seasons. Wait, and all these ones that when you were like, Haley going, pop something up your Jackson, like, you were, you were practicing when you were preaching.

I was putting my body on the line in different ways, okay? I'm demand, there's an entire episode where you over one week do every single piece of homeplay that you've ever given. Oh, God, no, she gifted to Haley.

It needs rest time. It needs rest time. Well, yeah, one week until it's out everywhere that you podcast and join us along. Every hump day, right? A new episode? Yeah, we're so grateful

to have you on. And of course if you haven't, binge the other seasons in the meantime on the IHard app, wherever you podcast, Spotify, Apple Podcasts. Couldn't care less, just listen and we'll see you in a week. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh Born and Hayle. If you

missed it, there's a great video on our social media of when we did our drop, the Sky City drop. For Defadal Day. For Defital Day. And I went up with news talk ZB presenter Heather Deplacey Ellen and while I was up there I talked to her

about the fact that we share a car park and sometimes when I'm staying late you know there's a bit of contention around she arrives I'm still in the car park I think there's been tension and you're obviously the more important broadcaster well yeah I don't know what she's doing oh this is what's happening in politics

I'm here entertaining people that's what the world needs right now People need laughter. We need to tune out. We need to be having a good time to start the day. And then while up in the big, the giant drop, she said, yes, you can have the damn car park, right? She was terrified of that drop, wasn't she? Yeah, she cried.

Yeah. Not me. So cut to yesterday, and we may or may not be recording an episode of Sex. Well, we just heard the podcast is back. I know, but we may have been recording another one, right? So we're recording this, and the episode we were recording went a bit long. We were just, you know, really getting into it. There was lots of things to tick off and stuff.

So again, I was in my car park longer than my allocated time. Now, any other person would come in, maybe. We've done this before, Vaughn you come in. You see your car park's full. You think, who the hell's in there? Yeah, you park in a temporary park. So you're park in a temporary park. You'll email Joe and say, someone's in my car park.

Not a problem. I'm parked in this number. I'm in this number. If you need me to move, blah, blah, blah, blah. I get down yesterday after a hefty day of work. Yeah. And Heather Deplacey Allen has pulled her car behind mine. It has tea barred me in.

Right, so you can't get out. So I can't get out at all. And it's so, it's not even, I'm against, my nose is against a wall, my side is against a pillar. My ass is maybe 30 centimetres from her car now. So you can't even do like a hundred point turn to get out. I don't know, because I thought about it. Yeah. Like an Austin pallet.

She's aggressively and quite pointedly parked me in. Yeah, yeah. And at that moment, Joe comes down. Joe takes, you know, charge of the building and everything. She's the one like you talk to about. The car parks. They say, Joe, there's petty, and then there's Heather Deplacey Ellen. I said, look at this.

Also, what's she doing driving a Jeep Wrangler? Yeah, well, I don't even get into that. That's not getting into the fact she's... What is she on party of five? Exactly. She's suburban based. And she's driving a Jeep Wrangler? Yeah, I know.

The moment I saw the Jeep Wrangler was like... She might live near San Jens. She's not living near Sanjones. She might. She lives in there paved, paved roads. Well, I don't know where she lives. So I do a, maybe. Been outside her house when the sun goes down.

Right. Just checking that, you know, her and Barry are tucked up tight. Yeah, nice and tight. I'd like to check on my fellow broadcasters. Okay, great. Thinking about the right. So, yeah, she's completely parked me in. So I say to Joe, don't worry about it, Joe.

Don't worry about it. I'll Uber home. And I'll get Vaughn who lives close to me to pick me up in the morning. I'm not dealing with this right now I'm not going up to bloody news talk and being like hmm and she'll be like you're here late

I can't be bothered with it I've got shit to do so I get picked up taken home Vaughn you bring me into work this morning but in the meantime I get a text I forgot we've got each other's number

because I email Joe and Joe's like I'll let her know that that was your car because they didn't recognise it's my mum and dad's car oh okay right in the moment's not my Mazda and she's

heather texts me at 2pm mate she calls me We're not friends We're not friends here though Hey with her Mate Call me when you're ready to go And I'll move my car to let you out

And I text her back I said bro Too late I've Ubered home My podcast ran over And I couldn't leave But glad you found The only park left in the building

Because if you go down there There were dozens of them Right Okay yeah She says to me Ha ha ha I'm not laughing either Oh yeah

I was punishing the person in the park. I do this every time. They never do it again. I called Joe to make sure. But you're a fool. You should have called me to get me to move. Anyway, she said, I'm going to bring this up on my show as well to get ahead of your bad-mouthing man.

She said, don't you live in QMU? I said, yes, yes, I do live very far away here. But thankfully, I only have to leave home at 4.30 a.m. Wow. Nemesis. This isn't the end of it, by the way. She's got a bad week, too. She's got a time.

I got my period yesterday. that yesterday. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there was a real... During the podcast record, I got the period and I came down and I was like, not today, heather. Not today. Anyway, it's not over. I haven't worked out how, but...

There'll be some revenge. She'll feel the wrath of Sproul. But I want to know who is your work nemesis and why. Maybe it's something small and it's grown and it's grown. How petty did you get, maybe you took something, you hid something, you blocked them in the car park, you just want to ruin their day a little bit. Maybe they steal your work, your work condom.

that are in the fridge. I thought you're going to say work condoms. I was like, that's an interesting one that you have a special pack. Are you work condoms different to your home condoms? I did put it up on social media though to shame her.

Tagger and all of it and I got so many messages being like, this is so pathetic from he had the deplesey. I was like, oh, I know. How embarrassing was a grown woman. Whether your nemesis knows it or not, 0,800 dial to them. We'd love to take your calls out texed us

966. Who is your work nemesis and why? Somebody said my work bestie became a work nemesis. Oh. I told my work bestie that I had an office crush and she went and passed him at the staff do. Nemesis. I called dips. Also, I don't think we should be patching at the staff do.

I also don't think you should call dibs on humans. No, no. No. We don't think we come with dibs on humans? It's not the last slice of cake. Fletch and I do it all the time. Yeah, I know. We're at airports. We're like dibs.

I've seen you do it. I mean, these people have no idea and it never happened. Somebody said, 1 p.m. dibs. Heather Duplicey Allen Parts you in perpendicularly That's the word

Oh yeah Okay Private school So many years ago now Lily Lily We have colourful coffee cups at work In the colour of the rainbow Red orange yellow

Well thank you for running us through the colours Well what comes after yellow As green as it blue When I empty the dish dishwasher I put them in Roy G bib formation Red orange yellow Green blue

Indigo Violet However I find sometimes I come back to the and someone has muddled them up. Not using the cups, just muddle them up. Anyway, I saw the culpros purposely muddling them up the other day. First hand, new enemy.

What's the revenge though? What's the, like, what's your next move player? Yeah. What are we doing? What are we doing? We've got to mess of something on their desk. What about some, you know that nail polish stuff you used to put on your nails to stop biting it? Yeah.

Around the band of all these marks. No, but they're not using the cups. They're just putting them out of water. Yeah. You've got to do something. You've got to do something to their desk. Let's get a little plan going. 9-6-96, keep your text coming in.

We should buy in some Tammu wheel clamps. Oh, now we're talking. I was like, what can I do to her vehicle? Yeah, or chain around the axle to the pillow. I was thinking of the same thing, Fletch. Yeah, that'd be great. And then she can't drive away. Or if she does, she'll pull the building down.

Do you imagine how much trouble should be. Imagine how much trouble should be if she pulled the building down. I know. Do you know what I reckon she get a warning? There's like five stories. Like, genuinely. Yeah. I'm thinking of something like that.

I'm brewing up something by the way. And if she's listening, he had to please yell in. It's war. It's on. It's on. Yeah. Don't text me, ha ha, mate. No, it's war.

So who is your work nemesis? My boss is my work nemesis, somebody messaged in. I only address them through emails now, so everything will be in writing for when the paper trail needs to be exposed. Oh, I wonder what? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my boss is my nemesis.

Every time I get an opportunity to grow in my career, he gives it to somebody else. Oh, that sucks. Yeah. I'd be looking elsewhere. Someone took our work from home too, literally, worked from home in India for five weeks. I was scuming, I'll never forgive. Hey, if you're allowed to work from home,

does your home have to be in New Zealand? Like, does it say that anywhere? It doesn't be in New Zealand every now and then. Probably not like Bali, Thailand, Fiji, India. No, but if that's your home. You would be a menace in a corporate environment. You would take the piss half been taker. Some liberties.

My work nemesis is a douchebag. Everybody's complained to the boss about them. When I complained, the boss is like, oh, I have had a few complaints, ask them all the people, everyone. They continue to just be their douchebag self. Oh. Someone said, is my work nemesis allowed to be a customer? A guy comes in every Friday and we need to open all the doors in Glenn 20.

It's Glenn 20 that spray the neutraliser. Oh, does he stink? Yeah, and still his smell lingers for far too long. I'm ready to throw 48 bars of stuff. soap and deodorant in his bag next time he comes up. Oh, yuck. Anonymous plays. Staffroom dishes always issues

thinking that Casper, the ghost magically does the dishes. Are you Casper? Two people who put their dishes in the sink and slowly slink away thinking they've gone unnoticed. I'll wait until they're not at their desk and take their dishes over and put them back on their desk. I was just going to say put the dishes on the desk. Yeah.

It's like when you've got flatmates to do this, you put them on their their bed. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I can't sleep. It's extremely passive aggressive but they get the message. Nothing brings up passive aggressiveness like dishes day. Yeah, this is something at the worst than everybody. There was a dude I used to work because there's a massive dick and I said one day, whoever's doing...

How big was it? Yeah, I do. When you can't just say massive and not say how big. Yeah. Sorry, it's a terrible joke. Sorry. I'm just so disappointed in your life first. I'm sorry.

Oh, God, I've just had an email. What? People have returned their tickets to our live show after that. Oh, far out. Yeah, guys. We've done so much work on it. We won't say jokes like that. We'll say better jokes on the time.

And let's go 10 seconds. Yeah, that's acquired a refund. Oh, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing, Bing. Holy shit. Is that the sound of all the tickets been canceled? No, do you know what that is? That's a delayed response from that terrible top six this morning. No, no, no, no.

Yeah, because it takes time for the ticket website to catch it. Land in a couple of hours. It takes a couple of hours. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. Oh, my God, they're coming in immediately now. Oh, no. It was too many. Off jokes, I believe.

Yeah. I get one. I said, whoever's doing the dishes in the back of this fast food restaurant, the sinks in the back are overflowing and I've turned them off. And he said, ha ha, ha, now you are. And I broke in that moment and I threw something at him and I said, F you. Oh, okay. Wow.

That's a work nemesis. It sounds like you were both problem. You're both part of the problem. I feel like if you and your work nemesis did one of those charity boxing fights, I don't know who would win. Yeah. You're both mongerles. Yeah, you're both got a bit of mongruly.

Ferral fierce mongrels. There'll be some absolute hit thrown. Hits thrown. My work nemesis has worked beside me for three years and she had constantly complained about how affectionate her husband was and how much she hated how affectionate her husband was.

Don't know why she was so much complaining he was wealthy as and a lovely guy. She was just a bit of a beer. Oh, really? I'd sleep with the husband and get some of that. Mool-la. Get some of that affection. I'll receive some of that.

I'm not getting any affection. You'd be like, yeah, I'm getting me. I'm getting that affection. The ZN Podcast Network. Play ZDM's Fletch forne and Haley. Red Cross is teaming up with Uber so that you can make easier donations of the clothes that it's just time to shuffle on, you know,

and donate for a great cause. So within the Uber app next weekend in Auckland Christchurch in Wellington, you can order a free Uber that will come to wherever you are and you just have your clothes nicely packaged up and clean and ready to donate. Yeah. And they'll take them to Red Cross.

so that you don't have to do that thing where you're just sitting around being like, oh God, I can drop these bags off. It literally could not be easier. It could not be easier. And getting behind this in a really big way is Melanie C from the Spice Girls and just bloody they came into the door, didn't they?

And they said, oh, Haley, I don't suppose you'd want to pop to Sydney for an interview on a very busy week. To interview a member from one of your all-time favorite bands. I was like, who is it? They said, Mel Cie from Spice Girls and I just lost my mind. I'm a huge Spice Girls fan.

I grew up, absolutely obsessed with the Spice Girls, and never believed I'd ever meet one. So I flew to Sydney last week, and I caught up with Melanie C. One thing I want to warn you about Melanie, I have a real habit of reflecting people's accents when they talk to me. Oh, really? Yeah, it's quite bad. I think it's okay because we're both white.

Sometimes it gets quite problematic. Oh, gosh. But I work on a radio show, and when people call up, if they've got an accent, I'll immediately do it. Yeah. funny. There must be a term for that because I think there are people who do tend to do that. Like mimics.

Yeah. That's bad. See, that's quite bad. Do you know, the one that I get, are you good at accents? I'm terrible accents. I wish I was good at accents. Can you? Because we're in Sydney, have you any good of an Australian accent? Terrible. I mean, I'm married to one, so I should be better. All I can say is, oh yeah. Oh yeah? That's what I can say.

Do you find the Australian accent sexy on your man? His is quite, he's lived in the UK and the US for a long time, He's got one of those like bastard accents, you know what I mean? When they kind of like... It's all over the place. Like a mongle accent, the girl kind of gets together. I would say, I think it was this year or last year, the New Zealand accent,

which I think is truly appalling, was voted the sexiest in the world. I love it. Do you know? Yeah, because it's very... It's thing. Do you know what I mean? It is very its thing. There's no wavering and there's no mistaking.

I mean, I know sometimes people may mistake it. Australian, but if you have a proper listen to the vowel sounds, you know where you are. Ours is more clipped. Yes. Where Australia has that like twash and chops. Yeah. Now, speaking of New Zealand, you came to New Zealand solo, not with the Spice Girls. Why did the Spice Girls shun New Zealand? Rood. It's just rude. I would say we were the biggest fans of all. I mean, I'm 37 years old. I am peak, Spice Girls, like I am your crowd. You are. Do you know what? That is the one thing that makes me so sad. about the Spice Girls is that there's so many countries we didn't get to because we were dead lucky in that We've got this incredible international fan base. Yeah

We only ever toured live in Europe and North America. That's it It's wrong. It's so wrong. Yeah And I know it's wrong that I love that you almost add a K to the word wrong It's so wrong because You like globally everyone adored you and then you sort of left out you know the islands us You know, half of the world. When you came to New Zealand finally, I mean, you'll be doing it a lot more, obviously, now that you're married to an Aussie, were you like, we should have been here the whole time?

It's beautiful. Oh, yeah, absolutely. I absolutely love New Zealand. I played there at a winery, which was gorgeous. I DJed there as well. Of course, I have a great friend in Cassie Henderson. Oh, isn't she amazing? Yeah, who's one of my favourite Kiwis.

She is incredible. The first time, she's performed for us a couple of times with quite good friends. And she opened for one of our live shows once. I remember being like, oh, you know, like New Zealanders, we like to stay really humble, and we're always like, oh, yeah, like on the world stage, maybe we don't quite match. And then Cassie opened her voice and I was like, oh. She's a superstar. Yeah.

Absolutely, I thought she was robbed last year. Yeah, so did we. I was so upset. Yeah. But she's very established anyway, you know, and she's doing great things. I know she's been in London for a while. She's writing, recording. She's actually going to be performing with me here in Australia in my background.

So, yeah, I'm looking forward to see. You need to be, like, coming over a bit more. I know. The wineries, Melanie, the wanner is. Now, let's talk fashion because we are talking about like op shopping. Are you an op shop girl from way back? Yeah, I am, you know. I think the person that introduced me to it was Jerry. Really? She's a big op shop girl. Yeah, I mean, back in the day, even in wannabe,

which this bus has given me big wannabe vibes today. Yeah, I'm feeling very nostalgic. But her outfit in the video is from an app shop. Really? A lot of the clothes she wore back in the day, yeah. Do you remember your first? like iconic op shop find when you were like oh my god I've hurt gold well I think I remember back to school when like you know when there was always like a bit of a

goth element like in the 80s I went off I went full goth everyone had a goth moment didn't they I remember like a lot of the guys that were getting those like floor length coats yeah and they were always from the up shop yeah so I've got some like really cherished memories yeah school times spice time yeah and you know even fast forward to today I love it I was only in the bed cross actually two days ago I've got really lovely teachers What'd you get? I got a...

Do you know that Saturday's NYC? There's a truck in Fonda, right? And it was a brand new, label still on it, cute little tea. It was like, ah, you know what I mean? Do you know, my first, like, iconic shop find was when I became a goth because I grew up a pop girly.

All of my fashion was influenced by you and the other girls. Crop tops, everything. I did, but my mum wouldn't let me because I was like eight, nine years old. Wasn't allowed to wear a crop top. So she made me join the crop top to the matching short.

massive camel toe because you know you're high I'm long in the torso and so I wasn't allowed to like really get into it and then I became a goth I went so far away from pop music my op shop finds were petticoats and I'd buy eight of them and then stack them on top of each other oh cute I like that I don't know and then I would get panty hose and I would cut them yeah and like make them into sleeves I went through a phase in the 80s when I was Madonna and it was obviously the desperate really seeking suit. Yes. Yeah. Era. And, yeah, lots of like fingerless gloves

and like freshman tights and dogs. Yeah. I think my family was quite surprised when I was a goth because I was such a a Spice Girls fan.

A couple of things I need to share with you and I feel like you might not want to be associated with a couple of these stories. The first one was we used to do this prank

me and my best friend where wherever one of us would enter a room the other one would be naked behind a chair going Oh yeah? Naked. I remember that?

Which again is kids was quite fun but when we redid it this year at our New Year's party at like 2 a.m. Yeah. And actually naked, not just folded down. Okay, yeah. That was quite a lot. One of the, like, one of my core memories as a child was, I was in the shower and it was a knock on the door and it was my dad. And he was like, hey, I was, you know, when you get out of the shower, when you'd have a bit of a meeting. And he sat me down in the most serious meeting I think my family has ever had to inform me that Jerry had left. and we had a big cry as a family and I was actually given a week off of school

to mourn. Wow. Wow. Yeah, that was pretty bad. And then to fix it, my dad went away on a trip and he was in Hong Kong and he went, you know they've got the ladies markets there? You know, they're like these big kind of like cheap markets. And he thought, I'll get her a Spice Girl Barbie doll

because I didn't have one but they were a bit expensive so we got an off-brand one. Okay. And it was like an action. man with a wig and it was you. Maybe that was the real one. I do go to their athletic body. That's always my choice of a bumbley.

No, this was a boy in a wig. For sure. And then one I think that you really won't want to be associated with, which is like every woman of my age or around my age remembers the smell of Spice Girls impulse. Oh yeah, I mean that's ingrained in your brain isn't it? I can smell it now.

Yeah, yeah. So I would It really like hits the back of the throat. Oh my God. So I was in a cupboard with my best friend, the one who we do the naked dances with, and we were spraying it in this cupboard, and she got someone in her mouth. Oh gosh.

And as like eight-year-olds, nine-year-olds, we assumed that meant she would die within moments. So we are such good friends. What I did was I took the can of Spice Girls Impulse and I sprayed it directly into my mouth. Okay. So if you were going, you're good together. And we held hands and waited to die.

Yeah. That is so, but that is probably quite toxic. Yeah, and I feel like maybe the Spife Girls, who I loved and loved so dearly, wouldn't want to be associated with like a, you know, nine-year-old sort of dark suicide back to the cupboard. And the only reason we came out and realized we weren't going to die because of this amazing impulse that, again, I can smell now, was because it was dinner time. And mum was like, girls, dinner. And we just went, oh, it fixes everything.

Oh, I think we're fine. Wow, you're certainly playing it really cool. Why don't have to do accents with everyone? I don't know. Anyway, there's more to talk about. We start talking about fashion next, which is very exciting. With Melanie C. Play ZM's Flash, Forne and Haley.

Melanie was telling me as well, she's donating some of her own clothes, and then they were informing to May. They're coming to New Zealand, and they're just going to go into a Red Cross shop. Yep. And then, Vaughn, you heard. Yes. Through thy grapevine. Well, people who text messaged in tonight.

9-696, that it's going to be an Albany. Potentially the Albany store. Albany, Regress. Why do you say Albany? You know, you made me say it like it's fancier, Albany. It's Albany, Auckland. That's not confirmed that's just rumour. But I did talk to Mel about op-shopping.

Okay, let's talk about op-shopping in terms of what we're here for, donating clothes. I've brought a few things, and I know you've got a few things. I'll take some home to New Zealand with me that I want to show you, and I know that the answer is don't donate. Oh, okay. Okay, this is, I think, the best op shop find. Oh! I have ever found.

That is so nice! I think you would love this, eh? Oh my God, it's so good. Yeah, so this is by a Japanese designer who designed clothes the David Bowie. And when I found this Melanie, I was like, I think I'll die in it. Yeah. Like, you can't give that up. No.

I mean, it would be loved by whoever was looking enough to get it, but I would find it hard to part with that. Yeah, I think so as well. I think this is the jacket. You know when you're like, if I feel like I'm about to die, I might chuck it on quickly. Yeah, maybe it would be a good... But there's all a death in this interview.

Yeah. It's a bit dark. It's getting a bit dark, okay? I was like, if I want to die in this, ideally not today, because I am going to be wearing it today. Okay, so if I do... And also, if I do die...

I'd keep that. I think, you know, there are kind of no rules with this. We just, we want people to donate, you know, beautiful things, things that they've loved, and they want people to go on and enjoy. But I think the only rule is just, Nothing that's knackard. Joanie.

You're not chucking out. It's not going to rubbish. It's for other people to enjoy it. It's such a bad thing. People get a stain or a rip on something. Which, by the way, I do apologize for ripping the Spice Girls T-shirt. No, I'm here for the customization. You've got to customize.

But yeah, you don't want people donating junk. Yes. Okay, I'm going to show you something that I think you're going to want, but we're slightly different sizes. You're going to love this. This is a fit that I bought it. Never worn. I can see the stripes.

Okay, this is an Adidas jumpsuit that I'm going to donate to Red Cross for this. Isn't that amazing? I think you should donate this. I think you should definitely donate this. Do you know why I have to donate it instead of wearing it? Why? I'm very long in the torso. I'm the same.

So long in the torso. The lace suits and jumpsuits are hard. They're just really hard. I'm six foot tall and it's all neck to groin. The legs, four of the six footer. I've got blessed with the long legs. Yeah. So I'm, you think this is a don't.

Donate? I do. I do. I know someone who'd love that. Well, if it's, no. She's going to have to buy it because this is what it's all about. I'm not just gifted. This is what's amazing as well that I found out today.

So all of the donations, all of the things that I'm donating, they will be in an op shop, in a Red Cross somewhere. They're not going to auction. They will be, you need to hunt them down. I will say, because, you know, I thought it was maybe going to be a little bit of, like, media magic. They're like, oh, she'll put in an op shop. Are you actually going to put it? It's actually going to put it. It's actually going to put it.

It's actually going to put it. be and we don't know where we're gonna just yet put them in different places so anyone could pick them up damn it Melanie I'm flying home tonight yeah yeah but you're there'd be places in New Zealand you're taking the New Zealand stuff yeah no can I look at what you're donating yeah come on show us okay absolutely I did actually yeah this is nice isn't it this is our suits actually I want this at the Royal at Hall performing in London and yeah it's amazing it's a really good fit really good cut and I mean who doesn't have a spark

coming into holiday season. Yeah, I will say I can't spit my thighs touch too much. You know, some thighs are distanced. Mine are best friends and they rub, so I wouldn't be able to wear that. But it's a very comfortable suit, it's very stylish, very chic. Can I ask about what this track suit is here? Yes, well this is actually the tracky I wore in the ads for the drive. Look at this.

And yeah, this is a custom made, especially for, yeah, for the clothing drive. It's cute, right? This is absolutely incredible. Can I ask, what is? What is the best thing because I know that you want my Adidas track suit but I'm not giving it to you. You've got to go into an option and find it yourself. What is the best thing like once the Spires Skills fame hit that you got gifted? Because I work in such a smaller capacity to you and the best thing I got gifted was a hat that says mushroom obsessed on it.

Okay, that's up there. Yeah, I'll show you, I've got it. It's quite good. What is the best thing that I've been gifted? You know, because people like you would probably get like a... Oh yeah, that's cute. You know, a Balencia, got for a Valentino or something. Are you mushroom obsessed?

I'll hone a mushroom. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, there's a wide variety, isn't there? Yeah. But I feel like, you know, celebs, they'll get this like $90,000, $90,000 bags, probably not. No, I mean, to be honest with you, because I love my sportswear anyway, some of the best things I used to get, when we were on tour, like, back in 98 with Spice Girls, and David came and joined us, and he used to bring me a lot of, like, umbrose stuff, like, the England football kit. Oh my God.

Yeah. Do you know I'm really, I'm notoriously bad at impressions and I do a good day but they think it's my best. Oh really? Go on then. Vick-Tor. Vicky, don't lie. Don't lie. Tell the truth. Be honest.

That's, that's good? Yeah. It's quite high-pitched. You know what I love it? That's from the duck, isn't it? Yeah. Don't, don't lie, be honest. Okay, this has been an absolute dream come true. I've got to ask you two questions that everyone,

all of our listeners want to know. One, you'll know the second one. One, favourite Spice Girl song. Oh, that's tough actually. Because I love the ballads. Viva forever's me. Viva forever. I've been doing that on tour actually

and that has been going down a storm. Love that. Goodbye. Two become one, too much. All the people of ballads. But saying that, wannabe gets such, I know.

No, no, no. You know what? It's an acquired taste. No, but it's an iconic song because it's an iconic song. I bring people so much joy. And I suppose it'll be life. Do you know, the only problem I have with Viva Forever is that tortured music video in which you like kind of, your fairy is like abduct a child. I mean, we just never addressed the fact that this child.

Like the parents would have to be sitting at home. They're like, where's my child? It was a little bit surreal that video, wasn't it? It was so full on. We just love that video because we didn't have to do anything. They're like, here's the video. It's going to be a number one video. You know, you're fantastic, yes.

Okay, and then final question I want to ask you, and I'm sorry, and I know you'll get asked this all the time. Reunion. You know. When can we have all over you? When can we? I hope it will happen at some point. Obviously, nothing to report just yet.

But we have so many opportunities, and we're always talking and seeing what we do. And who will be first? Because we were never on the main list at the first time. I know, right? New Zealand. Well, that would be wonderful. My choice would be to come to this part of the world,

obviously everywhere that was neglected. Yeah. Thank you. I mean, I go everywhere. You know, we have fans everywhere. Yeah. So, so fortunate. I feel like New Zealanders, we feel like we're still in that vending machine, you know?

Forgotten, abandoned and wondering. Melanie, this has been a dream come true. Thank you so much. I'm going to take your goods back to New Zealand with me. Yes, do that. And, yeah, and everyone donate. Because we all do this thing, don't we work? We have a bit of a clear-out, and then the bags are just stuck in the hall.

No, in the boot of the car for them. Do you know what I mean? And you don't need to do that because Uber are going to provide you with a courier service. I know. That's going to take all of your goods to the Red Cross and it's going to raise money for very important causes. So good. And you'll find some amazing finds. Not my jacket but this and some clothes from...

Yeah. Thank you so much, Melanie. Thank you so much. Nice to speak to you. Well, a dream come true. You played it super cool as well. I don't know that I did, but it's okay. Play Z-M. Fletch for a lady. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do to do do do do to do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do.

Do do do do. Today is a fact of the day is brought to you by St. Pierre's. Fact is today's sushi. The day is eight pieces of tasty tuna mayo for $8 40. It's lies all this week here. fact of the day. And how do you measure lies? A Liometer, obviously. Yeah, Liometer. Yeah, the Liometer.

Liator. The polygraph? Oh, that's right. The polygraph. I would never do a polygraph. Under another, you'd never do one. Nah, they'd have me all hooked up. We're like, I was going to ask you some fun questions. A fun social media video, and then they'd ask me a question, I'd have to answer it, and I'd be like, no. Also, aren't they not?

Bingo. Bingo. They're not at all. Yeah. So the year was 1920. John Larson had joined a police department with a PhD and physiology. He was the first rookie cop in America with a doctorate. He worked under a guy called August Volmer. And he was a reformer. Now that means he was trying to make police.

Well, yes, reform of Pilates. He was trying to make, he was stretchy, bendy, and he was trying to make it more specific and less about just beating people about the head. Right. Reform them. Yeah, right. Rather than, you know, put them in prison for life. So in 1921, a year into his thing, with a doctorate and physiology

burning a hole in his back pocket. And he read a Harvard psychologist, report on blood pressure and deception, Volmer said to Larsson, you're the clever guy around here, you're the doctor, you should build a lie detecting machine. So he's like, this is a nicer way of getting someone, we hooked them up, we ask some questions,

we see their blood pressure go up and down and we don't have to give them the third degree or interrogate them in the old-fashioned way, bashing them around the head, torture, bordering them, basically torturing them. So they needed something to test this on. In 1921, it was reported that someone was stealing jewelry, money and clothing

from the college hall, a woman's dormitory at UC Berkeley. So they said this is the perfect opportunity. It's like a small crime. There's a young people. They'll be nervous when they see people so their blood pressure will spike. He tested the residence one by one and came across a student called Heather Graham, who showed sharp spikes from Austin Powell.

Sorry, Hewling Graham. Helen Graham. Heather Graham. And every time they asked her a question about the stealing, her blood pressure and heart rate would go up as well as her breathing would change. So they questioned her until she eventually confessed left college and left town. And they were like, we've done it. We've invented a lie detecting machine. But Larsen, the man who invented it, was like,

I'm not 100% sure on this. And then guess what? Helen Graham, Heather Graham's mom, has left town. And the robberies pick up again and start to continue. Oh, no. So they're like, maybe she wasn't the thief. Here's a little sidebar. The student who reported the theft was a woman called Margaret Taylor.

And she was the first person... Elizabeth's mom. Elizabeth's mom. She was the first person who get tested on the lie machine out of all the students when they were all lined up, he tested on her, guess what? This Larsen Joker, afterwards, took a bit of a fancy, gets her contact details, they ended up married. That's just a sidebar.

You can't marry someone a test subject. No, you can't. That's conflict of interest. That's a conflict of interest. She may have been the thief all along. Reported herself, yes, marries the guy. So anyway, Larsen's like, I don't know, I don't trust this thing.

It's not foolproof. It might give us an idea. Someone might confess, but it's not like full proof. And this young fella comes in, Leonard, and he's just like, this is going to be great. He's a bit of a, they say he's a bit of a psycho. Okay.

So he eventually turns the polygraph machine into the very thing it was meant to not be. It wasn't meant to be interrogation. And he turns it into pretty much a torture device. Dark room, light in the face, hooked up, straight down like you can't go anywhere. And then you're asked, you were asked all the questions. Right. So then when Larson ends up dying in 1965 and the last, like, scientific work he wrote, He's like, I have created Frankenstein's monster.

I've spent 40 years in my life trying to say that it's not, it's not perfect. It's not the perfect machine. But this guy that took over, Leonard Keeler, has turned it into this, like, torture device, and I would like my name taken away from it. It's like, AI, you know, we've created it. And now we're like, what have I done?

Yeah. Have you guys ever had the chance to be hooked up to one before? You know, some sort of silly radio. We looked into it once. Wasn't there one person in New Zealand that was qualified to use it? Very expensive. They use it a lot in America. Yeah, yeah.

Polygraphs for crime and stuff, but it's so inaccurate. Yeah, it's flawed. It's a very, very flawed machine. So today's fact of the day is the man that invented the polygraph test said it was flawed from the start, and before he died, he said he had created a monster. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do.

Play ZDM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. We want to know right now when did a piece of clothing hurt you. And it just happens, doesn't it? There's a woman. Have you seen what? People, guys that get their caught in the fly? I mean, I'm sure that can happen to girls too, but not like. No, but we've got a bit more grip on.

That skin's thin. The top, the shaft of the penis has quite a thin skin on it. Oh, the shaft is not the end. Let's not go into the details. Oh, no. Okay. That's thicker of this elbow like. Okay, well this isn't as bad.

There's a woman who shared, it's a bit of a trend at the moment. Like nice, elegant dresses. A lot of wedding dresses doing this and putting a sort of a scarf across the throat. Yeah. It flows like that. Oh, yeah. But hers got caught in. I'm Anne Hathaway.

Yeah. Giving Anne Hathaway. Yeah. Her's got caught in like a motor. Yeah, nah. And it, like, pulled her and strangled her and left, like, quite a bad mark around her neck. We don't do that. No.

We tuck her in our scars. We tuck them in. It just, like, strangled her because it got caught and was, like, winding into this motor. It's terrible. Now, I don't have anything that, but I don't think clothes have hurt me too much. I've hurt my feelings. Sometimes clothes hurt your feelings. Sometimes there's a pair of jeans, and you're, like, you fit last time.

And then you put it on, and you're like, why? Why would you do this to me? But definitely all women have faced the stand on the end of your dress and it like tugs you forward. Like if you're in the era of the maxi dress and you step forward and the whole thing, just yanks your body forward and you tumble. Will you be taking stories of getting into clothes

and falling over and hurting yourself? It was the clothes fault. If it was the clothes fault, I'll accept it. Okay, okay. Well, 0800 dials at em. We want to take your calls now. Text through 9-6-96. When did a piece of clothing hurt you? Well, it was a me.

but it was my mum who thought she'd have an early night and went to put her pajamas on, accidentally tripped over the elastic of her pajama pants, and broke her hip. Oh, God. Broker hip. Broker hip. The worst thing was she actually couldn't reach her phone.

She lay on her bedroom floor for 12 hours until we found her the next morning. Oh, my God. I think she was started with that because we started laughing and now it's not good. I didn't. I never laugh. As someone that every morning after a show,

shower is trying to get wet foot through underwear that he's not bent over to put on properly because he's got tight hips. I'm waiting for this to happen and then to smash my face on the tile floor. And we'll be like, oh, should we go around and get Vaughan? Bag's not going in. Yeah, where is he? Yeah. He'll be alright. We'll check it on a couple of days.

Even when I'm naked, I've got my phone with in Rachel. Yes, yeah, we're never far from it. Kelly, thank you. Kat, when did clothing hurt you? Oh, hello. Maybe similar to what Vaughan was just saying, but I often, I'm very clumsy, and I often go to get myself dressed in the morning,

all sleepy, and go to put my undies on, and my little pinky-toe, that's often quite pesky, gets caught on the gusset, and clipped. The gusset of the panty. The gusset of doom. That bloody gusset, eh. It's meant to hold a lot the old gusset that's where the strep is. Yeah.

It's really embarrassing way to start the morning with the poor pinky toe. and just shame. And when you yank a pinky toe, I'm mad it hurts. Yeah, and I do it all the time and I never learn. Maybe you should put your socks on first, just an idea. Yeah, it's just an idea. No, socks don't go first.

No, socks don't go first. No, I go sock on first. But socks then protect the under-entry. They wrap the under entry. They do. They bundle the toe. Yeah, they bundle the toe. Oh, that's true.

I'm just thinking for you. That might be a good piece of advice for you, Kat. I know, it's good advice, actually. Yeah, change up. Change up your routine. You're absolutely welcome, Kat. Let's help us switch for it and haley. Sarah, when did clothing hurt you?

Oh, what a Muppet thing to do. So I was steaming a shirt. I was getting out one night for dinner, and I was steaming a shirt and thought, oh, it'll stay all right if I leave it on me. Why not? You did not steam with clothes. I've done this before.

It is so hot. I've thought about doing this for ease. Don't do it. I'll put it out. Second degree burn on my stomach. It's still got a. and I learnt my lesson very quickly that messing with the steamer while

steaming clothes while they're on you is probably not the best idea. Wait, did you put this steamer head on the material on your body? Yep. So there was no gap? No. Oh my God. Sarah. No, Muppet of the week. Muppet of the year.

Muppet of the year. I'm going to go out for Muppet of the year. Yeah, yeah. We don't have a prime Muppet stuff. The Muppet of the Year. But if there was, you definitely win it, Sarah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you. Keep your text coming in. There's so many. 9-6-96.

When did clothing hurt you? Grace Callie. Princess of Monaco died when her scarf got caught in the rear wheel of the sports car she was driving. She did. So she didn't. I looked it up. That's confusing. She did die while driving a sports car on a windy road, but she had a cerebral hemorrhage and plumbed off a cliff.

Slightly different. Who you're thinking of is the dancer Isadora Duncan in 1927. She was learning to drive a sports mobile. Sportsmobile? A convertible sports car. Sportsmobile. But she was in the passenger seat at the time and she was free and easy and she was wearing a long-road scarf because apparently she was a communist.

And the scarf got wrapped around the back wheel and strangled her. Classic. Oh my God. That's what happened to her. Some other people who have suffered injuries as part of clothing. I was living in my kimono and my chemo cape era, says Helena. How embarrassing. Great outfit to wear pretty much anywhere.

Not so great to wear around the carpet. the house, I kept getting myself caught on door handles. Oh, yeah. Oh, when your pocket gets caught on a door handle, the day's over, go to bed, just try again the next day. Yeah, yeah. You don't get that little yank and you're like, I'll tell you.

Quite recently, Manti, legit broke her ankle while trying to put it on a pair of pants. Now, she is on the larger sort of things. It's all right. This is where you've got to have a little... So, I don't know if you guys have seen as in a chair. Please kill me if I've ever described as on the larger side of things. It's okay. It's okay.

You guys should try having a chair in your bedroom. You just put it in the corner. Oh, get a foot up. And you mount, yeah, yeah, yeah. I do that on the toilet. I do that on my toilet, but I'm going to change in the bathroom in the morning. You put the lid down and just sit and then you can put your socks on. I've got a chair, it's in the corner.

It looks at the bed. Yeah, it's nice. That's what they're for. Untie's on the larger side of things. They go on to say, I'm surprised her ankles have lasted this long. Physicians will suggest the other one will go out soon. I guess it's not the pants filed, more of her fault. I mean, that's this is.

She's a bitch. It's not 9-6, 9-6, how fat's your arm, you know. We should do that one, do it? No. Funny. As long as, you know, we've had six months of Rita under the belt. We can only make fun of fat people once we get really thunders. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, my God, I was zipping up my jeans and my zipper got caught on my post-pregnant, loose stomach skin. Oh, my God, it hurt. Oh, I just winced. Oh, because that's all, if it's loose post-prevignant, that'd be like scar-tissued skin as well. Okay, next one. I was 10, you know, those pants that would zip up the sides. they were high fashion. I'm thinking of the dome up

80 of those pants that you could tear off if you were a stripper. I had the zips undone up past my knees, tripped and fell flat on my face in front of all of my friends skin my entire face,

ripped the pants. Dad was pissed. Someone said, who puts candles on the Florida wedding? What's on fire? Oh, it's me. You know, they let line the aisle and get this beautiful long dress,

whoosh. No. Mostly in some kind of synthetic polyester of crepe and satine. That's going to hurt. going up an escalator in my long skirt got caught. I thought I was going to die. Fought so hard, rescued the skirt,

large rip in the skirt and a humiliating experience in the centre of Auckland CBD. You've got to watch out on escalators too with like loose clothing and dresses. Yeah. I think just stay at home. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley.

Why does your, why was your OE cut short? I never went on a big OE. Neither. I did little trips and stuff. I just stayed and climbed the corporate. corporate ladder. Yeah, same. I did lots of drama and marching.

Look at me now. I'm a CEO. You're the CEO of Jackal, man. Oh, no, you've got your own. Actually, Vaughn does have his own company. Of which I'm sole shareholder, director and CEO. CFO. I'm all the ones.

Yeah, but you're also intern, coffee boy. I'm everything, baby. Accountant, you know. I'm a bitch. He's the office party pest. Yes. But I'm also the office party pestee. Yeah, and you can always play with yourself at the Christmas party,

but it's kind of okay. Because it's in my house is just late in the curtains are closed. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yes, we didn't do OEs, but lots of people do it. It's a real, like, Kiwi thing because we aren't in the bottom of the world. We want to get out. I want to know what cut your OE short.

Maybe it was a decision. Maybe it was not for you. Or maybe it was like a disaster. Because we've known people that we've worked with that have gone overseas and come back really quickly. So this woman, Gemma, she's an Aussie journalist. She writes, she's got a great substack called The Psychology of Your 20s. She writes for a lot of online. websites. She went to London to

spread her wings, baby, from Sydney in her early early 20s. She said it was like a new romance. She got their drinks, sunsets, new clothes, Europe trips, bra-w-w-wra-creative friends, living the London life, yeah, I'm gonna start smoking. All that kind of stuff. She said it wasn't absolute. It was the dream.

It was exactly what she thought it was. Three months in, she comes home. Wow. Wow. She was back to Sydney. I couldn't do it because she made such a song and dance about leaving and spreading her wings. I know. I'm here. She said within week one, a locksmith had scammed her out of 300 pound. A violent incident shut down her street and put her on the news.

Her health results needed urgent following up with a six-month weight in the UK. There were the tube strikes so she couldn't get around. There was a water leak. There was a tax bill. She was homesick. She missed her friends. The party life got her down. The travel wasn't actually available as she wanted it to be because she had to get a job.

It was just like. It sucks. Yeah, that sucks. So she went back to Sydney with a slight accent It was like... It would be so much better if she just tacked on the fact That she also got pregnant. Up the duff, come home.

It's hard to be pregnant overseas I know if someone came home because they got pregnant. They were with their partner and everything. They were like long term but they were just like... I wouldn't. I'd birth my child in the UK so I could get a British passport. Does it work like that there in the moment? I don't know.

I don't know. And a lot of countries it does that where you're born, you get the passport. Yeah, my friend is Torsi who was like very fed skin and ginger hair has a Dubai passport. Because her parents just happened to be in Dubai. Oh, wow. She popped out.

Yeah. Just what, a four-hour layover or something on Emirates? Get it out. Get a spicy passport. But anyway, so what ended it for her was reality. Yeah. Kicking in. And some health stuff.

You know, she had to come home and the cost to just wait there was too much. I want to know, 0800 dial ZM. Give us a little text a row. What ended your OE? What cut it short? And maybe it was someone you knew that only lasted a few weeks because, like I said, we've known people that have, you know, done the whole, leaving, have a leaving party

they go over and then they're back and like one of my friends left and they were in a beautiful relationship but they're like I've got to go, I've spread my wings and he was like, okay, yes go, I can't and she went over and it was just like, just missed him too much I was like, I don't want to do life without you, came back. Are they still together? Yeah, married.

Damn it, I was going to hope they. Married many kids, very happy. Damn. Like it was the right choice. Yeah, yeah. But it was hard and they were pulled back by love. Well, that's the thing. Maybe you booked your tickets and then you met someone.

Your book it was just so, eh? Okay, 0800.000. and I'm a text through 9-696. What cut your OE short? Sophie messaged in saying I was in Tesco and I was already homesick, but then I went for lollies, no pineapple lumps, burst into tears. I booked fly out time that night.

I'd only been there for a few months. It's weird when you go to a country and they have different lollies and chocolates and you're like, oh, I don't know what I want. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you know your favorites. In decision. Get one of each. Find your new favorite.

Liam said I went to Canada to do a ski season, broke my leg on day two. Oh, yeah. Brought your leg on day two. And that's like expensive to do that over there too. They had health insurance. I'm so spent three months watching other people ski and then just came home. Yeah.

Legs don't heal great. They're big bones, eh? Big ones. I did nine months in London and realized I hadn't seen the sun since March. Came home, pay it was a ghost. Mum said I looked sick on a video call and that wasn't it. She needed me to come home. I think it would be hard for Kiwis.

We grew up near the beach. Our summers aren't always great, but there's sunshine. You always get a bit of sun. Yeah. The UV factors through the roof. Chenet. Fell in love with a Spanish guy and a Kentucky to have followed him to Madrid.

Turned out of wife and kids. Time to come home. That's from Anonymous. I mean, we've all fallen for a Spanish guy in Madrid. Oh, haven't we? Well, no, on Kentucky and he takes you back to Madrid. I'll go wherever you're going, Madrid. Yeah.

Madrid, let's see. Take me, Pablo. I got to text. Someone was looking after my dog when it's on my OE and one day they sent me a picture saying, oh my God, he misses you so much. That was it. That was enough to get you home.

Home. I ran out of money in Amsterdam on week three. I don't want to go into the details of it, but that cuts stuff. Sure, I had to come home. I don't know if you should be going on your OE if you've only got enough money for three weeks. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, you're supposed to have saved? Like a London bond... A London bond's probably a year's worth of wages in New Zealand. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I told people I was doing my OE and then moved to Australia, and mum kept calling me Jake who went to Australia. Oh, Jake's been to Australia and mocking me. So I moved further afield, didn't like that, came all the way home.

Yep. Okay, so I was overseas and my old work contacted me and offered me a really, really good job. I was like, shit, it means I'm going to be able to afford to travel. So I came home and just kind of didn't do the OE, just did the traveling instead. Yeah. I mean, you were too. That's smart. Yeah.

I think that's why we didn't leave, eh? Because we're kind of in a job industry. There aren't many jobs. Yeah. You can't just leave. and you can't actually come back and just get in easily. Yeah, for sure. Someone said,

a mate of my dad's has got this great story about how he was overseas when a rugby world cup was on, but didn't like her there wasn't enough all black supporters overseas, so came on. What? Maybe traveling's not for you. Maybe it's not for you. Maybe traveling's not for you.

No. Oh, someone said my eye was cut short because I didn't have the right paperwork in the first place. So, shit. Oh, I got sent home. Yeah, right. It turns out you need a visa to work

in London. Get married. I have plenty of friends that did that to stay over. Well, that's your plan for the future, isn't it? Marry me for my British passport. That's right, baby. I'm not going to make it famous in London

without you, my love. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flash, Foran and Haley. Well, a girl's gone viral because she loves tracking her steps. Yes. And she has an Apple Ultra Watch.

Yeah. She is also wearing one of the fitness bands, a QM? I don't know that. brand and she's also wearing an ultra human ring. Good Lord, she loves to track. One of the many ring track. I think these ring trackers look so yuck. I see

so clunky. I hate that. I see. I was contemplating because they're a cheaper option than an Apple Watch. I was contemplating a ring but I'm not going to know. I just, I don't know. They just look like yuck. I don't think I could I couldn't sleep with an Apple Watch on. I don't think I'd be able to sleep with a ring on.

Yeah, I don't know. They're just chunky and plain. Yeah, and they're always black in there. Yeah, black. I don't know. Just kind of think they look weird. But anyway, she's obsessed, obviously. So she's obsessed and she's kind of highlighted the fact that, like, they're all vastly different.

So she did a day of just basically leaving home, going about work. She gets home. Her Apple Ultra Watch has 13,722 steps. Nice. That's a good day, baby. That's a good day. Her ultra-human ring has 8,231. That's quite a discrepancy.

That's like 500-odd steps. 5,000. A thousand, yeah, actually. No, not a thousand. No, you know you're right. You're right. Yeah, 5,000 or 800. Yeah, no, you're right.

That's a massive amount. That's half of your daily recommended steps. The Hume Health Band had 10,988. So she said that the health band and the watch were on the same. Rest? No, the ring in the watch. Yeah. So that's interesting.

Yeah. So that was quite similar to the Apple Watch. But then the Apple Watch is apparently it's quite good. good for tracking. But she's just like, it doesn't matter which one of these things you've got, they're all different. I mean, the step tracking thing is, should be, I just use it as motivation, a driver. Sometimes I look and I'll go 3,000 steps today, Haley, oh my God, you know, like tomorrow you're going to move a bit more.

I used to be very vigilant when I first got a Fitbit. You got it was 10,000 steps and it had a little party on your wrist. And I think they've disproven that and said it's more like seven or eight, yeah, seven or eight thousand. So, a day, it's good. statistics on fitness tracker accuracy. The heart rate is... Good, isn't it?

Heart rate is steps pretty good. Okay. Sleep is okay. Calories, basically a guess. Yeah, okay. Because everybody's different and it's just like an existing formula. So heart rate,

because they literally measure in the pulse, they're on the wrist, they can get it. Steps pretty good. One study of six trackers found the average era of 2% to 3% for steps. Yeah, the calorie thing's interesting because bigger, if you're bigger, heavier and carrying a lot more, you burn a lot more calories during the day.

But that doesn't necessarily affect your heart rate or other ways that it's tracking you. Do you know what I mean? So the what, yeah, it is probably a guess. So they wired people up to an actual machine that measured your calories burn and then also compare it to the like Fitbits and stuff. And Fitbit was the most accurate. Oh, wow. Okay.

Yeah. Sleep is the one that's very, very interesting. There was a 2024 study comparing the oral. the Fitbit and the Apple Watch Series 8 against the proper sleep lab. Oh, okay. It puts the cap on and lighters all your brain. So they were apparently all similar in estimating the total sleep time, but specific sleep stages, they got between 50 to 86%.

Deep sleep was the one that they really had trouble identifying. Yeah, right. From wearables. I mean, I don't think it matters as long as if you've got a goal and you reach that goal on your watch. It's up. It's a cent. It's accountability, right? Yeah.

It's accountability. It is. It's seeing those little rings or however it measures it and you've done it and you're like, okay, I feel better for doing it and you've been active and you've done something. That's why I drop my goals down to 1,000 steps a day, 100 calories burned and 100 of exercise a day. Killing up, babe. And I am smashing my goals. I'm smashing my goals and the body will come eventually.

Eventually. Eventually. If I keep smashing these goals. Slays, Z-Ms, flesh, flesh, fly. Morning, Hayley. Yesterday, I went, it's becoming a little bit of a Tuesday tradition. Tuesday train. My girlfriend trains as far as she can on the Western line in Auckland.

She gets on right by her work, thanks to the new CRL. Yeah. You know, I paid for a good portion of that as an Auckland rate payer. You personally did. It's good to get some. And then she scoots as far as she can go to Swanson. One day we're hoping for her trains all the way to Helensville. I was talking to Chloe Swarbrook about it multiple times.

I'm angry I wasn't dealt with on the leaders to pay last night. Trains, trains, trains. And I go and pick her up And because it's the perfect distance To drive my old Land Rover, it's lovely, I chug along. Yesterday I was like, I'm going to go the extra mile

for a bit of romance. She loves a cup of Roybus tea. I wish she's South African? No. Because they drink that. No, connection to South African. Roybus is literally Afrikaans for Red Bush, Red Bush tea.

Yeah. You know. You know this. You know this. I love a Roybus. Yeah, so you'll have a Roybus. How do you have yours? I'd surprise me she had it with milk.

I will go Roybus Half milk Half milk But the milk's got to be hot So the drink is Oh hot I made a little cup of tea In a thermos

That's a bit cute Yeah Got a little milk thing An off way total As she pulls in And she gets off the train I'm pouring the tea in And mixing the milk in

And there's a big fat smooch involved Yeah you've put in the air You get the smirches We're having a hug in a smooch Because train stations are romantic Probably second only to airports Really when it comes to Terminals of Transport

Yeah Airports Yeah But it puts romantic but also sad. Well, trains, we're waving goodbye to our soldiers. Yeah, you know. Casablanca. They're getting on a train at the end of Casablanca.

Yeah, I think so. So, um, are we having a smirch? And then I hear, excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt your welcoming of your lovely lady, but is that a series two land driver? Oh, he's got a carter's. Oh, God. And I spin around and it's exactly what you picture in an old mate. And he's like, I had one of these and I did many years.

I was just like, oh, no. I was, she had a cup of tea and sat and everything on we talked Land Rover's. I just felt rude. I couldn't tell him no. And then I traded it in in 1987 for a single cab Toyota Hylux. Now you can't get a single cab Hylux like you used to now. They're all double cans like this one over here. Too short on the back for me to sleep on.

And I was just like, mm-hmm. Are you seeing your future in this man too? Yeah. Well, there was warning lights. Yeah. And then, old mate loves a yarn, eh? And then it kind of naturally ended, even he was done, and he just kind of stood there going,

mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, obviously just a bit of inner monologue. Just thinking about the car. And then he looked and he kind of like, oh, I'll let you get back to her. To her? Well, she's there, T's done. Yeah, T's now waiting.

Moose passed as well. She's just waiting for you with this man. And I was like, I'm so sorry about that. She's like, that's okay because, you know, he was really enjoyed the chat. It really killed the mood, though, didn't they? It killed a little bit of the mood. Oh, no.

He killed a little bit of the mood. She was there to, you know, continue the smooch and all the way home. Cup of Tana fat smooch. None of that. And, yeah, just the old mate yarn, stuff. Right. Yeah. How long was he wiring off?

Dude, I don't know. It could have been 10, 15 minutes. Jesus. You've got to just say, hey, well, lovely to meet you have a lovely day and then just walk away. I can't, I've got a real problem. Better get her back on the road before she calls down too much. Can you keep it moving? Keep it moving.

You got to keep it moving. You got to keep it moving. A rolled one of these. That's what he got about a row. actually rolled one of these. Oh, Jesus. Forever's got it back on its wheels and it kept going. They're utilitarian.

Oh, gosh. Because these old mates are lonely. They'll just share. They love to chew. They'll chew anyone's ear off. And, you know, I don't know if you've picked up on this, but, you know, I've got a bit of a soft spot for lonely old bachelors. You do.

Your best friend's one. I tolerate a lot of bullshit from them. I'm not lonely or I. Why do you keep hanging out with this guy? Go look at me. He's a lonely old bachelor. You know me. I can't abandon him.

Love to just chew your bloody air off about vintage cars. Your nose and ears aren't as hairy as his weather. No. Something to aim for. My God, they do get hairy though when you get old, though, eh? Not mine, not yet. Oh, my ears are bad. The rest of my face, yes.

How do you? I'm going to get some of those little wax strips from the show sponsor and take care of that. Oh, no, you can't. You've got to trim. No, I just get the trimmer in there when you're trimming everything else. Pubes and nubes. Just a one stop. Saving shop.

Yeah. As you're going back, sack, crack, keep it ears, nose. I do the lot all on once. A whole lot. I just realised I did the whole show with my headphones on backwards. Well, that means the show's backwards then, isn't it? We're going to have to play this in reverse. Well, should we speak in reverse, and hopefully they'll work out the other way?

Give us a review. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.