ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 8th June 2023

Episode Date: June 7, 2023

Haylien News  Weighing Bananas  Top 6: Glue  Silly Little Poll!  Vaughans Hygienist  Hayleys Audi  Producer Jared had a Love Island Whoopsie  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleach, Fawn and Hayley Big Pod. Thanks to McCafe. Great things are brewing, one cup at a time. Good morning, welcome to the show, Fleach, Fawn and Hayley. And what incredible news to wake up and start the day with. A crocodile has made herself pregnant and given birth. Oh, fantastic. We don't need men anymore.

This is Jurassic Park. This is what happens in Jurassic Park. No, I thought that was... They filled in the missing DNA with frog DNA. Yeah. And then the dinosaurs became, what is it called? Something sexual. Yeah, this Costa Rican crocodile doesn't have a lab, though.

She did this herself. No, no, no, that's... Yeah, but I'm saying it's been done before. In a movie. And it's... No, no, no, in real life yeah, but I'm saying it's been done before. In a movie. And it's, in real life as well because it's in a... Okay, so Jurassic Park, my love,

is not a documentary. Shut your mouth. It's the greatest documentary of all time. It's a great film of fiction. Yeah, that island is absurd.

They did it with a woolly mammoth, didn't they? Or did they just find DNA from a woolly mammoth? It was with a woolly mammoth. No, they found enough DNA intact from a woolly mammoth to do it if they wanted to.

Yeah. And they could fill it in with big elephant DNA. Right. Big elephant energy. But we're in trouble if, like, crocodiles just start. No, she said other species have been doing it for ages. Oh, my God. Crocodiles, if they can self-replic replicate in very rare situations

crocodiles can breed with other crocodiles too yeah I don't know we just don't need a lot of them that's all I'm saying I'm just excited to meet Jesus crocodile crocodile Jesus the immaculate conception or the virgin birth they said so I mean if we could have one

as humans I just think that the crocodiles crocodiles... Crocodiles are not alligators. Crocodile. It was a crocodile, yeah. I wonder if the alligators will pray to that Jesus or hold out for their own. Unsure, Vaughn, unsure.

I simply won't pray to him. He doesn't have a rounded snout. Now, that's a difference. Major difference between crocodiles and alligators. Yeah. Yeah, the snout's pointy or not. Which I didn't know. A nice rounded snout.

Yeah. On a crocodile. Which one's which? I think an alligator's got a more pointy snout, but it's a smaller creature. Crocodiles have got the rounded snout. I can take it. I can take them both. Coming up on the show, the top six.

Got a bit of a sticky situation yesterday in Auckland off-ramp. You bet. But the media didn't really jump on the puns. But don't worry, the Facebook comments did. I've got the top six puns that the media missed, but Facebook comment sections got. Yeah, because of the glue spill. 22 tonnes of carpet glue.

Yeah. Just spilled onto... That's sticky glue. Sticky. Well, yeah, yeah. Famously, carpets need to be held down, don't they? Famously. I thought the carpet, it goes underlay and then carpet.

I think it's the underlay that sticks the carpet. Or you can just stick the carpet straight down. Yeah, carpet's not really... Yeah, if you don't have underlay, you'd stick it down. Underlay. Underlay, underlay. Underlay, underlay. Mama, E-I-E-I.

Oh. Should we play some Nelly today? Yep. Yep. Great. Always time for Nelly. No, Nelly and Kelly. Yeah.

Nelly, Kelly, dilemma. Nelly and Kelly with their dilemma. Absolute banger. Yeah, classic. That's a jam, actually. Harry Styles, Satellite on ZM. Play. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Now, have you heard

of the show 1% Club? Nope. No. Okay. I've only just learned of this show. It is a brand new show. Okay. 1% Club. 1% Club. It's a British show, like a quiz show, and you get asked,

contestants get the chance to answer a question that only 1% Club. It's a British show like a quiz show and you get asked, contestants get the chance to answer a question that only 1% of the population would get. So it's like, it's not like a quiz it's like a logic kind of genius level Like a Mensa level kind of quiz. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You've got to be quite smart.

It can be things like riddles and that kind of stuff. You've got to figure it out. It can be things like riddles and that kind of stuff. You've got to figure it out. Oh, my God, we need this show. There's an Australian version. Yeah, oh, is there? Posted by Jim Jefferies. It started in April.

So Joe Bloggs liked the chase. You just have a Joe Bloggs on there thinking they've got what it takes to answer this 1% question. Yeah, and if they get it right, they get $100,000. One question? Yeah. Or are there rounds? No, this 1% question. Yeah, and if they get it right, they get $100,000. One question? Yeah. Or are there rounds? No, it's one question. I'm going to Google some of these questions.

Okay. I'll give you a question and see if you can figure it out. Yeah. Okay. Because there was an Aussie contestant. His name was Michael. He came on and he just, like, got it. It was a mind-boggling question, they say.

Okay. This is like Slumdog Millionaire. He gets all the way through. Spoilerumdog Millionaire He gets all the way through Spoiler alert Yeah, wow He gets all the way Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa I read the book

The movie's beat out forever I read the book Slumdog Millionaire No, before it was called Slumdog Millionaire It was called Q&A Oh, okay I think it's been renamed now But that's a Jack Tame Saturday Morning Current Affairs show

Yeah, exactly They couldn't release that into market. Couldn't double that up. So, yeah, and he knew, he got all the way through Who Wants to Be a Millionaire through just this

wild amount of circumstance that he'd faced in his life. Yeah. So this guy that got it straight away, did he have some really awesome reason? Oh, I remember learning that

because we had a relief teacher that day or something. Nah, just a logical brain. Okay. I'm going to give it to you. Okay. If January equals 717. Oh, I'm out of way. Hang on, stay

with me. January just needs to January needs to equal one number. Yeah, January should equal one. Listen to me. I went to a decimal one school, Hayley. I know, and you need to represent all the people that were sent to these schools. If January equals... You watched this DSL5 genius go.

All right. We've got a 1, a 5, and a 10 here. Okay. If January equals 717, March equals 5315. Oh, my God. Oh, no, I can't even minus that. I can't even minus that on the fly. And June equals 4624.

4624. What does August equal? Now, the contestant on the show, as Vaughan furiously writes down numbers at the bottom of his piece of paper here, they don't have a calculator or a piece of paper or anything. No, they were simply given 30 seconds. Oh, wow. Okay.

Vaughan, what do you reckon? The first and the last number are how many letters there are in the word. So August will be eight something something eight. The middle is January is the first month. March is the third. June is the sixth. No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. One, two, three, four, five, six. One, two, three, four, five, six.

Six, eight. Oh, yeah, this is a good... Something six. That's quite a fast clock tick, isn't it? Where does June get two from? Sir, you have 15 seconds remaining. It's like a clock on meth. For $100,000.

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no, no. The genius things he's got. No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. You stop talking because you're distracting me wait, wait. No, no, no, no, no. The genius thinks he's got it. No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You stop talking because you're distracting me and that ticking's distracting me as well. Well, it's a game show.

There's allowed to be ticking. Vaughn, you're not entirely off. Eight, six, four, eight. Wait, no, no, say it again. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Eight, six, four, eight. How many years are in the word August? One, two, three, four, five, 8. How many letters are in the word August? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

Yeah, so why are you saying 8? Because 8, I got it the wrong way around. It's 6, 8, 4, 8. So you've just won $100,000! Yes! God damn it, see the ticking, the minute you started that ticking, I just couldn't think. Well, you're on a game show.

It shut me down. Of course he's going to be. And also, you weren't allowed to have. Well, you're on a game show. It shut me down. Of course he's going to be. And also, you weren't allowed to have a pen or a paper on the game show. Did he not have a pen? No. Just standing there, right? So what it was was, yeah, the amount of letters in the thing, what month it is, and then times it. Yeah, times it to get the last ones.

Good boy. You worked at that. So seven times one is seven. Five was how many letters in March. March is the third month. Five times three is 15. But you, as soon as there was some pressure there, you crumbled.

The minute. Yeah. The minute. Hey, is there an easy question for someone like me on the show? No, the whole point is that it's a one percenter. Is there one? It's like, what animal is this? And I'm like, way more people could get that,

but the one percent obviously includes people who would be able to do it in the time frame, right? Okay, Fletch, I've got one for you. Okay, okay. If A equals 1 and B equals 2, sir, for $100,000, what does C

equal? Oh, um, 3? So you've just won $100,000. Yay! I would have gone four. See, they should do a game show called Decile 1. Decile 1. Oh, so you were going to tie us.

Not the 1% is the Decile. You don't just Decile. There's some absolute geniuses come out of Decile 1 schools. I feel the Decile system unfairly represents. I know my there and there theirs and the your and yours. Your, your, we were. Yeah, sometimes. I would have said A equals one, B equals two.

I would have thought C equals three was too obvious. I would have gone C equals four, and they were doubling each time. Yeah. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. It's time for some good old-fashioned Haley and news. Now, I know sometimes you boys find it a little hard to get on board with these stories, but this one is undeniable. Is it?

Yeah. This one comes direct from a man called David Grush. And he used to serve in the U.S. military, and now he has become somewhat of a whistleblower. Okay. He has I don't want to use the word claimed. He has exposed

Okay. that the US federal government is hiding and doing a pretty extensive cover up on a number of non-human origin crafts, a.k.a. UFOs. UFOs. Wow, okay.

He said that they have had these for years and that they have been hiding them. That inside, it's a totally non-human exotic origin vehicle that have either landed or crashed on Earth. Right. Sometimes when they would find these, they'd find more than just that. They could find what they would say is some type of pilot. Some type of pilot.

Someone's got to's gotta fly it Pilot these things Yeah They I wonder if your technology Got to the point Where you could travel Inter

System Intergalactic Planetary intergalactic Planetarium Galactic Intergalactic Planetary Why would you need pilots?

Yeah You could just have... Autonomous vehicles. Yeah, yeah, like, well, we'll send a rover to Mars. Yeah, but no, but the aliens want to be here. Yeah, but no, but okay, man. Yeah, but no, but... Yeah, but no, but...

I've got proof. I've got proof. They're explorers, so they're getting out there and do it. But I thought you'd just be better to not risk... Does this whistleblower have photos? Because that would seal the deal, wouldn't it? Well, we don't know yet, because he's probably trying to get a little bit of money

out of this situation. Right. But he said that they don't call them UFOs. The US military prefers to call them UAPs, Unidentified Aerial Phenomena. Right. That's what they call them. That's when they say like the lights and the globes and the...

Yeah. So he said he has been sworn to secrecy. He served in Afghanistan, several roles in the US intelligence community, and was the National Reconnaissance Officers Representative to the UAP Task Force. So he's worked for the people that

have a look at these aliens and UFOs and stuff. And he's blown the whistle. And he's blown the whistle. If it's legit, this is going to be great. Yeah. But you know that they obviously aren't filling in the President. No. Because there's no way Donald Trump could have kept his mouth shut on that. No.

He absolutely would have been like. Do you, like, you've got to wonder what they did withhold from Trump. Like, there's the button, right? The button, the nuclear weapon button. Surely they just meant. The football. Yeah, it's a football. Yeah.

I think they gave him a, yeah, fake one. Fake one. Yeah. And all this stuff from, like, Area 51, surely they didn't tell him there. He couldn't keep his big mouth shut, as you say. No. I don't think they'd tell the president lots of things. Kind of deniability?

Any president. Yeah, right. Yeah, regardless. Well, anyway, this is undeniable. Okay, well, yeah. It's undeniable. It's coming direct from the US military. Keep us updated on that one.

Another fascinating and real Haleyan news. I'm sensing some sarcasm and I'm not appreciating it, Fletch. What's that sigh for? Well, no, certainly it doesn't reflect upon the client, Jetstar. No, and our fantastic prizes. Well, it kind of does because I want that. Well, you know that That would be handy.

You're not allowed to register and enter. But they want to. No, my is at Humanity. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. I do that most days. Humans.

We're still not washing our hands. 45% I saw somebody the other day walk out of the bathroom Humans. We're still not washing our hands. 45%. I saw somebody the other day walk out of the bathroom without washing their hands. I was like, wow. Yeah. I mean, you know, I don't touch mine. So you touch the doors. You touch the doors.

You touch the toilet paper plate thing. You touch everything else. I don't pee on my hands. So apparently in a healthy hand washing survey that has been around forever. Yeah. But obviously peaked during COVID. Everybody wanted to know everybody else was washing their hands. And we had to go in between the fingers and the back of the palms.

We were giving it the full surge of scrub. Even the Apple Watch brought out that thing. It's like 30 seconds. Keep washing your hands. It looks like you're washing your hands. Keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going. They should have that for the brushing the teeth too. I know, because I want you to do that for two minutes.

It's like electric toothbrushes. They've got the two-minute timer. They've got the timer on them. So apparently in 2020, when COVID was at its peak, pre-vaccine, 90% of people were washing up their hands carefully and following the instructions. No way they were. So now 85% of people say they still wash their hands.

However, only 45%, oh, sorry, 45%, so 55% are using soap. 45% of people are apparently now just water hands washing. Oh, right. I call that a hands rinse. Yeah, that's not a soaping, is it? That's when you're cooking dinner and you just got something on your hands and you constantly pop over and you give it a little rinse

and a rinse and a flick in the sink. But you're not giving it the full soapy wash that you did right at the start. So people are washing their hands, but the majority only just are using soap. Whereas 45% of people are giving it a rinse and a flick. Mankey. There's more. The survey asked about when you're traveling.

Are you washing your hands? 75% of adults made a conscious effort to wash their hands when they stopped on road trips. But at airports, 69%... Nice. Nice. 69% keep their hands clean. Yeah.

And 63% of people will put more effort into washing their hands when holidays are approaching. Oh, God. That's crazy. Oh, I'm going on holiday next week. I better wash my hands. I'll start washing my hands a bit more. Get the poo off these hands.

Yeah. You definitely wash your hands more when you're holidaying, though, eh? Especially when you're somewhere gross. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. A big soap energy when you're in countries where people are constantly like, they've got barley belly or Bombay belly or, you know, when you get somewhere and you might get sick off the water,

you go hard on the soap. Hard on the soap. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. You go hard on the soap. Hard on the soap. Is this not on or is this just smart? What are we paying for at the supermarket that we don't actually use? I'm talking about banana skins. Now, unlike a lot of other fruits, banana skin is not nice to eat. No. The skin.

Even in a smoothie. Lots of fruit. Like, you don't eat the mandarin skin. No. You don't eat the orange peel. No. I mean, you might grind a lemon rind into a zest Yeah While there is a man who has

he's basically embodying the essence of work smarter not harder He is at a supermarket, I believe in Australia I believe in Australia and he gets the bananas and he peels them and then he puts the just fleshless banana

into one of the fruit and veggie plastic bags, weighs that, and that's what he pays for. Would that be like half, would that be a quarter of the weight, the skin? Oh. You'd be saving. That's actually, I wonder if you could get what percentage, what percentage of a banana's weight is the skin.

Is the skin. Is the skin. Because if you were just putting these in smoothies or baking. Oh my God. Most of the waste from a banana consumption comes from the peel, which makes up approximately 30 to 40% of the weight. Wow. Okay. So this you could, I mean,

I don't know, I don't think supermarkets are going to let you do this, but if you did, it would be a lunchtime. It would be a lunchtime eat now banana, right? Like you'd be buying that on your lunch break and eating it then. I mean, bananas go brown famously

by themselves fully skinned. A banana without would go brown so fast. So brown so quick. Yeah, but I mean, if you were just getting them to put into smoothies or to put into something else or like different recipes. The freezer. If you're freezing bananas, you peel them anyway. So you'd peel them and you'd take them.

But this happened in Australia as well with broccoli because unlike New Zealand, they do the entire broccoli on weight. Yeah. Whereas we do it per head. Yeah. And people were taking the stalks off, like taking knives. You're just snapping off the heads. Or snapping them off.

Took vine tomatoes off the vine because you didn't want to pay for the vine. Well, it all adds up. Now the vine weighs nothing. Yeah, but over the lifetime, Vaughan. It's just so convenient to pick up one piece of green and have six tomatoes on it. No. I'm paying for the handle. Over the cost of your life, that could be $100.

You know what? Over the cost of my entire life, I'm happy with paying $100 for that convenience. For a green stalk. Over the entire series of my life. That you never eat. Right. But is this going to encourage people now to peel oranges? You can't do that, right?

No. And do you remember, so with the broccoli thing last year, supermarkets started saying, like, you must not break the seams of the broccoli. All broccoli purchases will be checked at the registers, thank you. And, like, you'll be charged for the whole thing, basically. Right. But then if you're self-serve weighing a banana.

Yeah, because that's what it means. If it's self-serve and you're printing your own sticker or you're just doing the weigh on the thing and putting it in, no one's there checking your bag and mesh your banana. And you're technically getting 30% to 40% off the banana because of the skin. But in this article that told me that that's the way of the banana, they've got some recipes for banana skin. Oh, no, we're not doing that some recipes for banana skin. Oh, no,

we're not doing that. Banana businesses are Dutch. Oh my god, vegans use it. Yeah. Do they? Yeah. Oh, yeah, vegans use it. For meat. Oh, okay. So there's... Is it stringy? Or does it, when it cooks, does it go... Pulled. So they do pulled peel, which is a plant-based alternative to pulled pork. Oh, okay.

There's a spice mix, and then they make banana peel bacon, which is banana peel peppers, onions, and tomatoes, and you make it into a crunchy bread. Well, maybe the supermarkets could take all the peels and repackage them and sell them to the vegans. To the vegans. Yeah, vegans pay anything for a meat substitute. Yeah, I would say that we're certainly not encouraging this. I would say the supermarkets have come down hardans pay anything for a meat substitute. Yeah I would say

that we're certainly not encouraging this. I would say the supermarkets have come down hard on this. I think so too. If they catch you

I think you'll be done for shoplifting. So I would not recommend this. I would not encourage or recommend this because yeah

they're not going to like it. It's very silly. But 30-40% off of the night. 30-40% off at the night. Play. ZDM's Fletchvorn and Hayley.

Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is the top six. Listen to these boring headlines. Truck spills 22 tonnes of glue on highway on-ramp. That's all it says. Oh, dear. Another one.

Auckland motorway on-ramp closed after truck spills 22 tonnes of carpet glue. That's all it says. Oh dear. Another one. Auckland motorway on-ramp closed after truck spills 22 tonnes of carpet glue. That's all it says. I'm very disappointed in this company's news representative of the New Zealand Herald. They're not even trying to come up with a pun. There are so many puns. There's so many puns. It's glue. I remember

when I was young, there was a book. Jason Gunn released a book. Oh yeah. And it was full of jokes and quips. And remember when I was young, there was a book. Jason Gunn released a book. Oh, yeah. And it was full of, like, jokes and quips. Yeah. And one of them was, like, news headlines. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny.

And one of them was, like, fake news headlines. Yeah. One of them was, like, a glue truck is overturned on the motorway and motorists have been asked to stick to their lane. Now that was crack up, man. Classic Gunny. It was classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. Yeah. I like that. You're right, crack up then. Classic Gunny. It was Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny.

Yeah. I like that. You're right, actually. Classic Gunny. Dare I say, 34 years later, that deserves that round of applause. It does. Classic Gunny. So I was pretty disappointed.

Yeah. But I was not disappointed by the comment section. Yeah. Which once I was... Sometimes it's awful and sometimes it's fantastic. Yeah, well, once I got through the overt racism and the beneficiary bashing, I got to some comments.

Good. Top six today. The top six puns that the media missed but the Facebook comments got for the glue spill. Number six comes to us from Carolyn Armstrong. Okay. Carolyn said, gives a whole new meaning to be stuck on the motorway.

Yay. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. She's done a classic Gunny there. Number five on the list of the top six puns that the media missed

but the Facebook comments got for the glue spill comes to us from David Hick. The Minister of Transport's onto it. Just another sticky situation for him to sort out. Classic Gunny. That's Gunny. It's got Gunny written all onto it. Just another sticky situation for him to sort out. Classic. Classic Gunny.

That's Gunny. It's got Gunny written all over it. Number four on the list of the top six puns that the media missed but the Facebook comments got for the glue spill comes to us from

Michael Roberts. Michael Roberts said, then a group of bank robbers drove through the glue. Police are looking for some hardened criminals. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny.

Yeah, Gunny. Number three on the list of the top six puns that the media missed but the Facebook comments got for the glue spill comes to us from Etu Havel. He jumped on the motorway thinking he'd been fast-pasted, and he was right. Classic Gunny. Gunny, Gunny, Gunny.

Number two on the list of the top six puns of the medium is, but the Facebook comment's got for the glue spill, comes to us from Lindsay Wilson. Someone didn't adhere to the road rules. That's good, that's good, that's good. I like that a lot, I like that a lot. Producer Carwen, did you have to think about that one for a second? You looked a little like, is that a...

Adhere, like adhere. Adhesive. Adhesive. Glue's an adhesive. Adhere to follow, to stick to. Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. And number one on the top six puns that the media missed but the Facebook comments got for the glue spill

comes to us from Carolyn Henderson. Yeah. This isn't funny, it's a mess and my husband is stuck in traffic and to read all these terrible jokes while I'm waiting for him to us from Carolyn Henderson. Yeah. This isn't funny, it's a mess and my husband is stuck in traffic and to read all these terrible jokes while I'm waiting for him

to get home for lunch is ridiculous. He's stuck in traffic. Classic Gunny. Classic Gunny. You know he's stuck. He's stuck right there. He's stuck in traffic. Yeah, that is today's top six.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Well, I've had a recipe change. My knickers. Oh, no. My favorite knickers have had a recipe change. I thought you were going to say there was a biscuit or something. Like we talked about the squiggles that have... No, it's my knickers.

Or a spice blend or something. It's the only time of knickers I wear. And last time I purchased them, I think I got like 10 pairs. I can relate to this because I've got a favorite knicker that I always purchase. think I got like 10 pairs I can relate to this Because I've got a favourite knicker That I always purchase What are you So do I

You're a bonds boy aren't you No I'm a Calvin Klein Oh you're a Calvin Klein So's about it Oh my gosh must be nice Not like the real posh posh ones But just like But they're good

Does Calvin change his recipes Well yeah they have done in the past And it's been upsetting Because I've got the one kind that I like. Yeah. Yeah. I've got my one kind as well, but I think they've changed the recipe because they're just getting smaller and smaller.

They're tighter and tighter. What is happening? What have you put in these things? Yeah, I get these jockeys, and they're like a, what do you call them? A boxer brief. Yes. Like they're not loose cotton boxes. Yeah.

They're made of the stuff that would give you the impression that it's satiny or silky, but it's not. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Are you familiar with this material? Yeah, like a really soft cottony thing with a bit of a knot to it. But they're not cotton. Not cotton in the traditional sense. Yeah, right. It's a cotton blend. Yeah, okay. So there's a bit of stretch to it. But they're not cotton. Not cotton in the traditional sense. Yeah, right.

It's a cotton blend. Yeah, okay. So there's a bit of stretch to them. Yep. But there's freedom, there's support. I've always been a big fan.

Yep. And Shade was in Farmers the other day and she said, your knickers are on special. Your panties. Please don't say that. Your panties are 30% off.

Yeah, your panties are 40% off actually. Wow. That word, even when their ads come on and theyies. Your panties are 30% off. Yeah, your panties are 40% off, actually. Wow. That word, even when there are ads come on and they're like, panties, 30% off. I'm like, stop it, farmers. 30% off women's panties. It's a cherry on top special.

It's so weird where you want to keep your cherry inside your panties. Yeah. Also, it's so funny how people are so disturbed by that word. Get over it. It's like the word hoot kiss. Yes, say it. It's a fun, it's just a word. Take the power out of the word.

If you're scared of it, say it a bunch of times and it just becomes funny. We're taking back panties. We're taking back panties. Okay, so Shada is at Farmers. She messages me. She says, your panties are on special. Would you like some? I said, absolutely. And she said, apparently it was in Farmers. She messages me. She says, your panties are on special. Would you like some? I said, absolutely.

And she said, she apparently was in Farmers and went to look because apparently there's a few pairs that are on the way out. Oh, no. On the way out. Oh, no. They've done a good service. They've seen some things and they've been around a while. And I said, yeah, sure, but they've got to be this type.

Yeah. And she's like, I know the material. I was like, perfect. Now, she sent me a photo. She said, just to confirm, these are them. And I said, that's them. However, the font has changed. Oh, no.

On the waistband. The font has changed on the waistband. And I was like, hmm. And she's like, it's the same material. Definitely the same material. This is not something I'd outsource. You've got to pick your own knickers. Well, I would have picked them anyway.

She couldn't have picked better knickers. Because they were the same material. And I did say to her, the font's changed. And she said, you and fonts. I get a bit carried away with fonts. You and fonts. Yeah. And I was like, I don't know why they

needed to change the font. They had a perfectly acceptable font. This font looks cheaper. Right. Have you got them on now? I do, actually. These are my new panties. OK. How has that changed? It's the same. No, you got them on now? I do, actually. These are my new panties.

Okay. How has that changed? No, the font's changed a little bit. It's the same jockey font. No. It's a bit more spacey. It's a bit more spacey. Between the letters.

The letters are a little bit smaller. It does look spacier. Yeah. It's a little bit smaller. But anyway, I was like, that's fine. They were discounted, so she bought me a few pairs. And then I wore the first pair yesterday. Yeah.

And immediately when I put them on, I was like, they've changed the recipe. Something's different. Something's different. Well, it's because they're tighter. Maybe it's because they're new. But I don't remember the, they're riding a smidge. Oh, okay.

Now, I don't know if that's. Is that a you thing? Is that a me thing? Or is that a jockey thing? The other jockeys have been with me through thick and thin. Literally. When I got big, thicky boy. Yeah.

When I lost weight. And the large has always been the size. They've been worn in then. So I think you need to give this a bit of time. These are a bit of time. Also feel my wash. They might have up. We did give them.

I gave them a wash pre. Yeah, that's a good call. Because you don't know who's sliding into panties in this thing. No. People are trying on panties left, right and centre. And they shouldn't be, but wash pre. Yeah, that's a good call. Because you don't know who's sliding into panties in this. No. People are trying on panties left, right and center. And they shouldn't be, but they do. Yeah. Very insistent on it.

So, but I am also feeling more support in the, what's that? The scrotal area. Right, is a lot more, right. But is that because it's been a few years since I bought the last pair. Yeah, you've got to wear them in. Have I experienced stretch? I think you were forcing your last underwear down, gravity and things, and it stretched them.

Gotcha. And so these are brand new. These are offering the support, a little tighter around the quad. Give it a few more workouts on the cross trainer, on the treadmill. I don't wear undies at the gym. Oh, that's right. You put some mesh to ball. You grate your testicles

with a mesh. Like a microplane. That is disgusting. There's a supportive pouch for running shorts, specific gym shorts. You also don't know when someone's going to down trail you. It could be at any moment. If I get down trailed at the gym, there will be

words. Unless in that video, that woman Any moment. If I get down and drove to the gym, there will be words. Yeah, but you'll be naked. Have you seen that video of that woman who falls over on the treadmill and grabs that, and then the treadmill belt rips her pants down? You could be down-trailed. But that would take your panties down. That would take your shorts down. Well, maybe not the new underwear.

They sound like they're going home. Aaron has a membership to the same gym as Vaughn. I'm going to tell you. I'm going to say, if you've ever seen Vaughn at the gym you're going to pull his pants down he's not supported he's not supported in any way

jeez well anyway there's been a recipe change in the undies right okay well so have you seen me picking at them or like pulling them down

or like doing that thing where you put your you put your hands in your pocket and I don't know if ladies do this but guys you put your hands in your pockets

and you put your fingers under the front things and you give yourself a little testicular. Yeah, I do it when you hook a lip. A little testicular. Wow. There I was thinking testicular rearrangement is something and you go and say that. Wow.

Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. We're having fun over here. Watch out. We are laughing out loud. Yeah. But I'm Hayley's silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole.

Well, today's silly little pole inspired by something that I saw at the gym yesterday. There was a guy over from me working out. Why were you looking at him? Well, he had a giant bogey hanging off the end of his nose. That's why. Was it hanging? At first I was like, is it like a nose, like, stud or a nose piercing?

And it was like, you know, it was like a crusty bit of the inside. You know when you get a big crusty booger? When you get, like, almost, like, right off the wall. Yeah, it's like a snake had kind of shed its skin and it just kind of pops out of your nostril. It was like that had kind of slipped out this big crusty booger and it had kind of attached itself to the end of the

nose and was just like sticking out. Oh, God, can you feel it? I know, that's what I thought too. And then I was like, well, I don't know this guy. I've never met him in my life or seen him. You can't just sort of go. I can't just be, well, I did that. I like kind of touched the end of my nose like,

because you know when you have something in your teeth or you have a booger, people kind of mimic that. They're just like. Yeah, and they start going like that. And you're like, oh God, is it me? Is it me? Yeah. Yeah.

And I was like, do I tell this complete stranger, hey, you've got the biggest bogey I've ever seen hanging off somebody's nostril? Or do you just leave it and he'll just eventually, when he wipes his face with his gym towel, feels it, he'll get rid of it? And I chose not to mention anything. Passive. You didn't. You rubbed your nose to indicate to him he needed to rub his nose.

Yeah, but he didn't notice. And so he had a bogey on the end of his nose for a long time. I always tell people if they've got something on their face, up their nose, in their teeth, I'll always say so. See, I'd say to a friend, I'd say to one of you guys, I'd be like, hey, you've always got something in your beard. Oh, we do that. Yeah, like go like this.

Go like this. You've got a mushroom. You've got half a mushroom in your beard. That's growing there. Yeah. That's attached to your flesh. Yeah, it is. I've sprouted that. Someone said only a true friend. I always remember someone saying only a true friend or a nice person will tell you such a thing.

Yeah, it's so good when people tell you. Or same with undies, your skirt tucked into your undies or even your tag hanging out. You've got to tell people. Well, how did the nation vote? We put it to a vote. Would you tell a stranger they have a bogey or food in their teeth? 34% of people said, yeah, sure. 66% said, nope, too embarrassing.

Yeah. Because then you've got to talk to them, and then they're embarrassed because you've pointed it out. Yeah. Hannah. Hannah said, depends on my mood. If I'm feeling like a petty Betty, I'll say, nah, find that yourself.

But if I'm feeling like a nice person, then I'll pull you aside and I'll tell you. Right. Pull you aside, that's nice. A little private word, if I might. I'd get on the gym intercom. Yeah. Bing bong. Tension members. Someone's got a boogie nose. Everybody rub it once. Yes.

Danny said, oh my god, no, that's too embarrassing. I could never tell, but I hope someone would tell me all bit discreetly if I had that. Oh, no, you can't. You can't have the best of both worlds. Sorry, Danny, you can't have it both ways. You've probably got a booger right now, Danny. Yeah. Danny, Danny, go like this.

Go like this, Danny. Danny, go like this. Oh, Danny. Hayley does do that. Hey, Vaughan, go like this. Yes. That's the best way. That's the best way. Go like this. Go like this. Go like this. Go like this, Danny. Danny, go like this. Oh, Danny. Hayley does do that. Hey, Vaughan, go like this. Yes. That's the best way. That's the best way.

Go like this. Go like this. And sometimes you don't have anything there. She just likes to control you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like a puppet on a... It's a power play. Yeah.

Like a puppet on a string. It is. Vaughan, go like this. Go like this. Go like this. Yeah. Uh-huh. Now she's got me again.

Now the nose is still there. It's still there. Oh, it's still on. That cute little nose, that's attached on That cute little nose That's attached That cute little Butter nose Can't go anywhere I wasn't sure

That little award winning Schnoz there Still there Jen says no Not because it's too embarrassing But because I don't care And it doesn't bother me Okay Jen

Calm down Wait it doesn't bother her That other people Have stuff in their teeth Or on their nose Or a boogie on their nose. Oh, she's just... She's just whatever.

Okay. Absolutely, said Jen. I worked in retail and when you are told women that had lippy on their teeth, immediate trust built, make a sale every time. Oh, yes. Oh, my God. Jane has weaponised it. Could you say that anyway?

Because if there was no mirror to check, just be like, just go like this, and then do it, and you'd be like, done. Got this? Trust. Yeah. Have you seen, there's that interview, it's Emma Watson and maybe Daniel Radcliffe.

And she's like being interviewed by someone. She's like, I'm so sorry. I just, I hope that you would do this for me. And she like goes up to the woman and like rubs something off her face. And the woman's like, I'm so embarrassed. She's like, no, don't be. We always do that. Everybody's dream yeah it's be

she's got such a lovely voice so there you go you can use it to make a sale Zoe said a stranger I'd just scratch my own nose and start licking my teeth as a hint

it's like yawning and it's infectious you see someone else doing it and you start doing it yes that's a good call and Mel said

on my first day at work I told a lady she had something in her teeth. Turns out she had a round hole in the top of her two front teeth. This is the thing. We've said this before. You've got something on your teeth and it was a permanent stain. Oh, yeah.

Never, ever, ever go to brush off a hair off a woman's face. Let me tell you that. Or to grab it and pull it because then it's worse because worse because you go yoink, yoink, yoink. What's it, you've got an eyelash. Oh no, that's just their beard. Oh dear. Yeah. So there you go.

Towel people, but not everybody. No, most people won't. Oh, it's after half past seven, so I can say good morning to my dental hygienist. As soon as he leaves the show, he leaves his house at 7.30 in the morning to head to work and listens to the show every day. Oh, lovely.

So next time I go back, he'll be tested. I'll be marking down what happens just after 7.30 every morning and I'll say what happens July. Right, you won't go back. A year's time. A year's time. Go back in a year's time. Are we all going to give a good morning to our hygienists? I don't know my hygienist name.

I would also like to give a good morning to my cobbler. Good morning to my cobbler. We've each got our representative cobbler. Was yours retiring? Coles. Yeah, but he's still there at the moment and I'm trying to convince him to start making marching boots. It's a long story.

He's an old man. I'll say good morning to my baker and my butcher. What about now? I will say good morning to the candlestick maker. Now, apparently those three had a hell of a night last night. I would like to say good morning to my gynecologist. Good morning, Chern. Dr. Chern.

Everything's settled. Okay, good. Settled. Settled. So not better, but settled. Okay, good. Settled. Settled. So not better, but settled. I don't know why, but I would always assume females would be gynaecologists, like female doctors. I don't know why.

Mine's a female, but I've had a male. I've had a male when I first got all my PCOS stuff. They were at med school, and they're like, okay, which in the class wants to do vaginas? And all the guys are like, hands up. You're just like, no, that's not. It doesn't feel like that's how it should happen. Yeah.

Who wants feet? No. I'll take feet. Who wants gastroenterology? No one. All right. Vaginas? Yep.

I'll do it. Me, me, me, me. I'll have a go. Because there's a second year at med school where you kind of decide what, you start getting into your streams. Yeah. Part of the body. You think of a 19-year-old at Otago University is like,

yeah, I'll do vaginas. Or they're like, urology. And they go, yeah. But then you don't see the nice ones, do you? There's always a problem. There's always something wrong. There's always something happening. Well, you know, hats off to everybody in the medical profession.

Good morning to everybody. Everybody. All of our individual medical professionals. How do you become a hygienist? It seems like the more fun part of being a dentist. Isn't that what the middie is doing, Producer Jared? Is she going to become a hygienist? Yeah, she's working towards a hygienist.

It's a long study, isn't it? Yeah, so she's doing first year health science at the moment and then she finds out if she gets into semester two, which starts. So she could still deviate into fannies. Yeah. She hasn't yet hit that intersection. Yeah, right. She thinks she's going to Tooth Town, but maybe she's going to Fannyville, you know?

We don't know. Yeah. And so how many years all up is it to become a hygienist? Three, I believe, and then five if you want to go through to dentist. Oh, okay, wow. So you can still make the transition to dentist from hygienist. I don't know. Because hygienist, like, I'm not taking anything away.

He knew what he was doing. Yeah. But he was like a car groomer. No, they do. He's like a car groomer and the dentist is like a panel beater. Yeah, right. Do you know what I mean? No, the dentist isn't a mechanic. The like a panel beater. Yeah, right. Do you know what I mean? No, the dentist isn't a mechanic.

The dentist is the mouth mechanic. Yeah, right. But with a side of panel beading because they have to build, like if they need to build you a tooth. That's a long time. It's incredibly, yeah, intricate work. This guy was just detailing the car. He was getting a bit of mud off the interior of the well.

That's a lot of. So, yeah, he's like, when did you last go to a hygienist? I said, I actually can't remember, but I think it would have been like 2007, 2008. Right. Because when I got my temporary tooth, filling my temporary tooth in 2010, I didn't get a hygienist situation then.

Yeah, no. Because I said I was coming back, and then I never went back. I love the hygienist. It's great. Dude, my teeth are... I did have a couple of sense of the spots.

Yeah. With the, with the, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz,

zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, zzz, You can really tell. Are you telling me you floss till you bleed? Yep. And he said, you can't floss too hard. Really? He told me you can't floss too hard.

Okay. He said the blood is the only... He pretty much said blood is fair leave in the body. He gave me a 1990s no fair slogan. Yeah. We both scaled a Monster Energy drink and then did a motocross front flip. Yeah. No, but he said you can't floss too hard.

Right. So you got a compliment. Got a compliment. Yeah. And it didn't take too long. He said, yeah, if someone hasn't been to a hygienist for that long, you expect it to be a longer sesh. Yeah, right.

Settle in. But now we, yep. Good. I'll tell you what happened. What? It was awkward. Yeah. I didn't catch his name.

I asked his name four times. I didn't get it. I stopped asking. So you're so deaf. Are you better? No, no, I wasn't. Oh, no. There was the mask

Oh yeah okay Everything Then at the end I was like Are we done? Yeah And he's like Yep all done

So I sat up And took off my napkin Your bib My bib My dentist bib And I took off The cool sunglasses Oh you always get

Cool sunglasses Cool pair of sunglasses And I was like Oh thanks for that And he said no problem Now he put his hand out. And I would describe the hand as a vertical hand. Yeah.

So portrait, not landscape. Yes. Not flat. Like you're about to go, give me five. It was vertical as in handshake. And so I was like, I mean, he has been complimenting my teeth and my flossing routine. Maybe he wants to congratulate me on the job.

Well done. So I'm like, thanks. And I shake his hand. Yeah. And he's like, no, no, no, no. Give me those. But I've still got his hand in my hand when he said, no, no, give me those. And I'm like, I just keep shaking.

And I'm like, I don't want to shake your hand, Vaughn. And then, ta-da, gave him back the cool sunnies, gave him back the bib. He said, I don't need that. And passed me back the paper towel. And I'm like, oh yeah. He doesn't want to shake your hand, Vaughn. And then, ta-da, gave him back the cool sunnies, gave him back the bib, he said, I don't need that and passed me back the paper towel and I'm like, where do I put this?

And he pointed at the bin and I was like, screw it up and put it in the bin, grab my stuff and I was like, well thanks very much and then I went to shake his hand again. What are you doing?

Why are you being so awkward? Why are you being so, you don't shake a dentist. The man had been in my mouth. No, but you don't shake a profession, you don't shake the doctor's hand when you leave. I shake my doctor's hand. No, you don't.

Thanks for that. Shake the hand. I don't want to touch your hand. They're wearing gloves. You're in there sick. No, you don't want to touch your gloves. I thought they had someone's bum before you. I hope they changed their gloves. You don't shake a professional's hand. I shake a professional's hand. No, you don't shake a professional's hand. I say this as a woman who hugs

her doctor when she leaves. You don't shake their hand. Why are you hugging? You don't hug a professional's hand. I say this as a woman who hugs her doctor when she leaves. You don't shake their hand. Why are you hugging? You don't hug a professional either. Oh, well, you know I've got a personal relationship with my doctor. You know my lawyer, I hugged him because he said I was cute. And because I referred to myself as cute, I said I'm pretty cute. And his mind was blown that a man over 30 would refer to himself as cute.

So every time I see him, he calls me cuter. He asks my wife, how's that cute husband of yours? And so last time we were dealing with him on leaving, he kind of gestured to a handshake, but his hands were wide. I was like, he wants a hug. No, you don't hug a professional. You don't hug a professional. You don't even hug me.

No, I know. Hugging your lawyer. I'm not paying you an ungodly Hourly amount If I'm paying someone by the hour I want at least a hug 20 minutes away from 8 next on the show I want to talk about the people Who blocked you Had the audacity to block you and you can't believe it Play ZM's

Fletch Vaughn and Hayley You've probably seen this story. It's everywhere at the moment. An incredible rescue on Mount Everest. So there was a hiker, climber? I think you say climber when you're going that high. Because I think this happened close to the summit. In the danger zone.

Really close to the peak. And yeah, they call it the danger zone or the death zone where a lot can go wrong. And there was a climber who was nearly there. He goes by Ravi. And he became really ill, like just was going to die basically. And lay down where he was and prepared to die. And then another Sherpa, because sometimes you have a Sherpa that's like allocated to you or your group, right?

You hire them. It's a major employer in Nepal. And to climb Everest, it costs you like... $10,000? No, it's like a hundred and something. Isn't that close to... It can be up to $200,000. Really?

Yeah. And that's not even including the socks. No, and you haven't even gone to Kathmandu yet. No, we have socks. So, this Sherpa was with another group. He was with his own group that had hired him

when he saw this climber on Death's Door. And he stepped in and literally, if you haven't seen it, it's incredible. They he stepped in and literally, if you haven't seen it, it's incredible. They wrap him in a sleeping cocoon, like a real like, you know, intense one and straps him onto his back.

Almost like he's rigid, like straps him onto his back. It's an insane photo. And then he carried him all the way down. Carries him all the way down to safety, you know, and stops his tour with his other group. Not tour, but, you know, his guide. And I don't, at the start, I don't think they were happy about that

because they'd paid like tens of thousands. Yeah, and so they had to turn around as well to help save this person's life. Now, the person survived. They definitely weren't going to. There was absolutely no way so this Sherpa saved his life then he took to Instagram the guy who survived

and was like thank you so much to my sponsors and everyone for your words of support but gave no thanks to the Sherpa that had literally carried him like a backpack and this man would have been I don't know between 80 and 100 kgs.

Yeah. You know, if you think about just an average-sized man. Yeah. And not only didn't thank the Sherpa, but has appeared to block him on social media. Yeah, dude. Yeah. I'm reading all about this. This guy's, like, been on TV and everything talking about his experience and thanks to this rescue

that got him once he got to the base camp where the Sherpa got him down to, but no mention of the Sherpa that got him down there. Yeah, and then goes on to thank like 12 sponsors. Yeah. And then everyone is just like, dude, you are the most ungrateful human in the entire world.

So like literally, it's not hard to find the Sherpa's name. Like maybe you didn't know at the time the Sherpa's name because you, maybe you didn't know at the time the Sherpa's name because you were unconscious and about to die. Gal G. Sherpa. He's got 150,000 followers on Instagram. He's the youngest person to climb K2 in winter.

Yeah. He's done 13 summits over 8,000 metres. He's the co-founder of AGA Adventures. He's now Denali X-Men. Like, the dude's like a living legend. Yeah. And he saved the stranger's life with no thanks. And not only no thanks, but blocked him on Instagram.

It's an incredible story, and I'm glad that we're bringing light to Galgie Shippers. Everybody's been jumping in online because they cannot believe the sheer audacity of this guy to block the man who saved his life. It's so bizarre. Maybe to forget to thank someone in the heat of a moment, but he's had so many interviews, as you say,

and to block them. What? The audacity. The sheer audacity. The sheer audacity of it. The sheer cliff of Everest and the sheer audacity of this man. Exactly. This is what I want to know,

if we could take some calls and some messages. When did someone have the audacity to block you? I mean, this is a rare situation. I think it's going to be more like when you were surprised a family member had blocked you, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or just like suddenly a friend group and then you're like, huh? What? I don't know.

I was just trying to think. But you also have to kind of find out that you've been blocked. Because if you just get blocked, you just like... Because if you search for them and they don't show up, that's how you know you've been blocked on Instagram. Yes, because I am part of a group that one of my friends got blocked from. And I was like, did you see the post on this? And she was like, no. And I was like, oh you see the post on this? And she was like, no. And I was like, oh, I wonder why. And then she went to look for it and was like, oh, my God,

they've blocked me. And I was like, why did she get blocked? It's a long story. It's not for on here, but, you know. Sounds like exactly the sort of story we'd like to hear next on the show. It is. On the show, why she was blocked. We want to take your calls.

0800 dials at M9696 to text through. When did someone block you? And they just took the sheer audacity to do so. Tell us why. Maybe there's a juicy story or a reason or there's just no reason. You can't work out why they've done it. Why have you been blocked?

Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. We want to know this morning who you just cannot believe blocked you. I know. Like the mountaineer that nearly died and a Sherpa carried him down and he's blocked the Sherpa on. The Sherpa's cute. Oh, my God.

The Sherpa's cute. I'm going to hit the group chat with the Sherpa. With the Sherpa, yeah. Is he single? No no He strapped him to his back He saved his life And the guy Didn't even thank him

And then blocks It's such a bizarre story Really bizarre I hope it's unfolding Because I need to get to the bottom Of why he's been blocked Ashley who Can you not believe

Blocked you? So it was actually my brother So the story goes is that he was still living at home and I had just recently moved out but I still had half my wardrobe at my parents' place. And he had the audacity

to wear some of my clothes and when I hit him up about it, he got real shitty with real grumpy with me. And then blocked me and I haven't heard from him, so. Wait, how long ago was this, though? Oh, a couple of months. Oh, wow, and he still hasn't got over it.

What of your clothes was he wearing? Coats? Oh, just like my hoodies and stuff, like the ones that I'd left at home. Right. Is she your audacity for that? Is she your audacity? To use your clothes and then,

and he has an unblocked, do you think by Christmas you would have sorted this beef out? Oh, honestly, I've tried, but. Maybe for Christmas you can get him

an AS Colour deal. Yeah, five items for 150 or whatever it is. But then also, I know a lot of family that don't like to follow family members just because they don't want

the family knowing what they're up to on stories and stuff like that. Ashley, thanks, you call. We want to know who had the sheer audacity to block you on social media. Some messages in. NZ Blokes blocked me on Facebook because they didn't like a woman's perspective on their garbage takes. Yeah, but you're probably not supposed to be on there.

No, but is this one of those like Facebook groups? It sounds problematic. I got blocked by the Freedom and Rights Coalition. Apparently they didn't like being called Muppets and Clowns even though that's my freedom of speech. And I do love how people who tout the freedom of speech block people because they don't agree with them. Yeah, I love that.

Yeah, that's irony that unfortunately goes right over their head. Freedom of my speech. Yeah. The speech can be free as long as it agrees with what I have to say. My cousin blocked me for no reason whatsoever. I haven't spoken to her in like four years. There'll be a reason. No, but that would annoy me not knowing the reason.

I'd ask auntie. Ask auntie. I'd be a reason. No, but that would annoy me not knowing the reason. I'd ask auntie. Ask auntie. I'd be like, auntie, why did your daughter block me? Hannah, why were you blocked? Who can't you believe blocked you on social media? So, it was back in like 2015,

I think I was in college and we had this friendship group and it was in the time where like you tag everybody on Facebook for what you're doing, like you went to the movies or whatever. Yeah. And I went to tag a girl from my friendship group and it was in the time where like you tag everybody on Facebook for what you're doing like you went to the movies or whatever yeah yeah and I went to tag a girl from my friendship group and she didn't come up and I was like oh that's weird so then like I saw her the

next day at the cafeteria and I was like you blocked me on Facebook and she was like yeah I had a dream that you stabbed me and I don't trust you now. Oh, my God. Classic. 15-year-old girls. Okay, wow. And you were never friends with her again? Well, that was the problem. We were all in the same friendship group and, like,

she was done with the friendship right at the end of the day. But then we all still had to hang out with each other. It was just really awkward for the last few years. Because of a dream stabbing? Yeah. I mean, why should I be surprised? And as if you realise that, like, that's not real. And she's like, yeah, but it means something.

Oh, yeah. I don't know why I'm acting surprised. The amount of times my wife's been angry at me because Dream Vaughn did something silly. Yeah, exactly. But she doesn't block you, though, does she? No, she's coming close. Thanks for your call, Hannah. And Maddie she's coming close. Thanks, you're cool. Hannah Maddy, who can't you believe blocked you on social media?

It wasn't actually me that got blocked. It was my partner. He got blocked by David Sarrius, a message in him saying good morning and good night every day for a week. Friend of the show, David Farrier. Lovely man. Why was he messing with the fans? I know, it was a stupid thing.

I think David had put something up saying, why won't this person stop messaging me? It was someone else, so my partner thought it would be funny to keep it going. And they weren't, the stupid thing was they're not actually strangers either. I think my partner kind of knew him. He's got a stick of him and blocked him. He hasn't been unblocked since. Oh, wow. Oh, no. I think my partner kind of knew him and got sick of him and blocked him. And he hasn't been unblocked since.

Oh, wow. Oh, no. David Farrier's got great content as well. You know, he's missing out. Yeah. I know. He's kind of a fan of David Farrier. Yeah.

I mean, you could keep your partner up to date with what Fazz is putting on. Yeah, just pass it along. What Fazz is up to. Maddie, thanks. You called Cumberland Messages to finish up. My boss of eight years blocked me after I applied for and got a promotion within the same company.

Oh, that's better. That's better. That's terrible. I don't care if anyone blocks me. They obviously can't handle my shining light. That's what someone messaged in. Oh, yes.

You know what? They've got big block energy. I would 100% have hit them. I'd block them. I wouldn't block them. I'd mute them. Yeah. I'd mute them and I'd hire you.

Yeah, that's a mute. You're muted. Niamh, who can't you believe blocked you? My boyfriend from last year. Okay, let's get into it, Niamh. Let's get into it. How long have you been going out with this guy? We went out for maybe like a few months.

And we never like actually had any sort of argument. Like, it was, like, a long-distance thing. But when I say long-distance, he lived in, like, an hour away. So that's, like, a long-distance. That's not good. So that's medium. Medium, well-done. That's medium-distance.

Medium, well-done distance. Yeah. Yeah. And he just, like, blocked me. I was, like, I, like, kicked him. And it, like, didn't go through. And I'm, like, um, okay. it didn't go through. I'm like, okay. I tried calling him and went to voice mail. I was like,

what is happening? You hadn't broken up. He just completely ghosted you and blocked. Yeah. I was like, broski. What? Broski. Are we still

bro and broski? What are we? Are we broette and broski? What are we? What are we? Are we broette and broski? What's going on? What's happening? And you haven't seen him since? No.

I'm not sure. His loss. It's funny because he, I know that he worked at Spookers. So if anyone wants to go like find him, please do. Now was he there? Was he the scary clown with the eye blood? Was he the guy with the chainsaw? Yeah, he was an actor.

Oh, he's an actor. That sends it all in, doesn't it, Hayley? Oh, who is it? Text me, who is it? I feel like a father figure at this stage. I would air you to tread lightly around actors. His loss. Hard to date.

Oh, we're fragile. They're a fragile bunch of actors. Thanks, you cool tread lightly around actors. His loss. Hard to date. Oh, we're fragile. We're a fragile bunch of actors. Thanks, you, Courtney. It's a really sad day, and I have some difficult news. Do you want a sad song? Can you lay me down a sad song, please? Yes. There you go.

Oh, perfect. That's appropriate. You may have been following along on quite a wild journey that I've been on this year. The date was March 20th, 2023, and I drove my terrible old car up to Audi in Auckland City, where I was temporarily loaned an Audi for a month because I'd hassled them so much on radio

that they just wanted to shut me up. Relentless. I would call it relentless hassling. Almost harassment. Yes. Saying, give me an Audi, give me an Audi. Now, you remember they got in touch and they said, here's an Audi for a month, have fun.

And... March, April, May. See you then. June. Wow, that's a long time. I've been driving this Audi for three months, a quarter of my year. And you know, I wasn't sure where it was going, but they were happy to let me keep on driving it. She's rounded up for him, just let her

have it. What, March? April him. Just let her have it. What, March? April, May, June? Three months. Three months. But that's not a quarter of your year so far. No. I'd say half of the six months, but then I'm also rounding up.

A quarter of a year. A quarter of a year. A quarter of a year. I beg your pardon. Apology accepted. I'm emotional, Bourne. I'm sorry. I'm emotional.

I'm going through a lot because yesterday, after three months of driving the Audi, I received an email with the sad news. They said, we're sorry to say, Hayley, we have sold that Audi and therefore we need you to bring

it back. How could they have sold the Audi that you were driving? They've repoed it. They've repoed my car. They've repoed your car. They've repossessed it. Yeah. Because they sell secondhand Audis or like Audis that are, because this is a 2023 car. But somebody's bought it sight unseen then.

Or they've seen one that's similar. And they've said, we've got one like this. Yeah. Did they get that thing out from between the console and the seat that you dropped? I think there's still a little bit of custard in it. Custard. I like to think, I think the people at Audi will probably give it another going over before this. Yeah, they'll give it a full hoover.

Now, look, I was never under the impression that I was being gifted an Audi, but it's a sad day. Wow, so you're back in the stands. You want the world as it stands to feel sorry for a woman in a position of privilege who's had a free car for months. Yeah. Who has to give the car back. Who now has to drive the moldy, stinky Maz again.

Well, here's the problem. That's only moldy and stinky due to this privileged woman's mistreatment of it. No, but here's the problem, right? The Mazda was sort of, it was a bit of a stinky dink. Now I've abandoned it for three months. And I went in the other day, because Aaron uses it to do like easy like plant and dirt and reno drop offs I went in the other day there is

mould growing in the cup holder there is some kind of unexplainable smell it smells like it's been raining inside a little bit there's two bags of compost that have been in the boot for this whole three months and now I've got to like just return to this world.

And yeah, I am open to receiving thoughts and prayers and well wishes. So that you can get through this tough time. I just want you to know if you're noticing a different tone in my voice, I'm going to do my best as a broadcasting professional to keep it together.

I'm going to have to go back to getting a ride with you, Vaughn, now in the chimney. Because I can't go back to this. I'd be happy to be your baiter. Thank you. There's no room in the Jimny. This is the perfect mountain road.

What if Mercedes makes an approach at this stage? I'm loyal to no one. I'd love to drive a Mercedes. Loyal to no one? You corporate... W word. Witch. You corporate... W word. Witch.

Yes, yes, yes. You corporate witch. Well, good luck. Thank you, and it's been a lot of fun. Thoughts and prayers. Back to the stinky dink. I'm open to receiving thoughts and prayers. Play.

ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. Now, the new season of Love Island. Gentlemen, I've got great news. Love Island's back, which means you're going to have some alone time. Oh, you're going to get some extra PlayStation time. Yep. Well, no, I don't think Sade's going to watch this one. I've done some reconsidering and I'm going to watch it.

Have you? I need a bit of trash. Light trash, light trash. Yeah. Light trash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Started. And this is what got... How many episodes a week week out of this absolute train wreck of a television show?

I don't know, like thousands. But can I ask, why was Sade talking the other day with Aaron about the Kardashians? At dinner. Yeah, I said to Aaron, Aaron was like, what should we watch? And I was like, I'm watching the Kardashians. He's like, oh, my God, so is Sade. And I was like, what are you chatting about? And then we were just talking about what we'd been watching lately.

Right. Oh, right, and she said the Kardashians. Yeah, she said the Kardashians. This is what landed producer Jared in a bit of hot water, but an amateur move. Amateur move. My dude, my dude, my dude. Producers, last night you were watching the new season.

TVNZ Plus is where you can watch the new season of Love Island. What do we think of the cast? Yeah, good. Yeah, hot. Yep. This is what got you and this is what got Jared in trouble. I wouldn't even come on now and say hot. Ask me.

Vaughan, what do you think of the cast? Not to my taste. Not as good as your wife? God, no. You seen who I'm married to? Yeah. That was good. That was good. Really good. It's a tonal thing You see who I'm married to? Yeah. That was good. That was good.

It's a tonal thing. But also, to be honest, Jared showed me the cast. And I even said, honestly, didn't I? I said, no one there's my cup of tea. Yeah. And that's without hearing them speak. And then you hear them speak. It's all like, are we going to get on it?

Are we going to get on it? You know, are we? I've got to get my Botox done. I know. But you look lovely, Margie. You don't need to have that in bed. We're going to be down to Pummel Island and doing the drink bottles, aren't we?

I want to go get a tan. Yuck. It's always the yuck accent. So there's not anyone kind of racially ambiguous looking for you? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure, but nah, just not for me. Okay. Not for me.

Right. What landed you in hot water yesterday, producer Jared? One of the gals caught my eye and I said, oh, she's pretty hot. And then a few scenes later I didn't realise I was talking about the same girl. And then I said, oh, she looks like your friend so-and-so. Dumb. You dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. Dumb. You dumb. Dumb. Dumb.

You dumb, dummy, dumb, stupid boy. You basically said your friend's hot. Your friend's hot. That's what she heard. What your lovely partner heard was your friend is hot. No, no, no, no, no. What your lovely partner heard is your friend is hotter than you. That's what the woman hears. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, no, no. What your lovely partner heard is your friend is hotter than you. That's what the woman hears.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. For a start, here's the rule. You never say they're hot until you are asked which one's the hottest, and then, despite what you really think, you point at the one that looks the most like your partner. Yep. Okay. Gentlemen, you know now.

Write it down. Write it down. Which one on La La Land are you? Louder again looks the most like your partner. Yep. Mm-hmm. Okay. Gentlemen, write it down. Which one on Love Island do you... Louder again for the man at the back. If you're caught watching one of these dumb shows, never say which one's hot. Wait till you're asked. Spy what you think. Yeah.

Say the one that's got the most traits in common with your partner. This is how long have you been married? Successful marriage of... End of this year, it'll be 13 years. I'm lucky for some, but I'm just settling into my groove. A baby. Wise advice. Which one from Love Island are you talking about?

The lovely Molly. Molly, okay. Molly. Wait, are you talking about Molly from a while ago? The woman that looks least like your partner on the whole show? Yeah. Oh, dude, she looks nothing like your partner. Come on!

I know. I'm a fool. You damn fool! Oh, no. But she's just got such a bubbly personality. No, shut up. You're in too. Here's if you want to throw a spanner in the works.

Again, gentlemen, avoid watching this show. These shows are no good. And if it's your little bit of alone time, who's the hottest? Throw her. Throw a spanner in the works. Again, gentlemen, avoid watching this show. These shows are no good. And it gives you a little bit of alone time. Who's the hottest? Throw a spanner in the works. Probably George. Say a guy. Oh, okay.

See what happens. Drop that bomb and then walk away and PlayStation. Yep. PlayStation. PlayStation. But George looks just distressingly similar to the Middy's brother. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. But now you've said to the middy's brother. No, no, no, no, no, but now you've said she's got a hot brother.

And that's fine because genetically, ta-da. You're better to say that than a guy that looks nothing like her brother. Now she's going to be worried about her boyfriend hooking up with someone's brother. You didn't say your partner's brother's hot. My wife's brother's a very attractive man. Boy, he was the lead singer of a band. Of course he was. He's brother's hot. My wife's brother's a very attractive man. Boy, he was the lead singer of a band. Of course he was. He was a hot boy.

Didn't he win Cleo Bachelor of the Year one year when he had a partnership? She didn't like that at all. Because, again, what a dumb idiot entering that competition

when you've got a partner. Why am I surrounded by morons representing my gender? Morons. Utter morons. Come on! Well, if you want

to get in trouble, TVNZ Plus has a new season of Love Island and you're going to start watching today, Hay on! Well, if you want to get in trouble, TVNZ Plus has a new season of Love Island, and you're going to start watching today, Hayley. Yeah, I'm going to get on board. I need a little bit of unwinding. And some inspiration, yeah, for some work I want to get done, like a little bit of lip.

I think I'm going to get my lips filled. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day comes to us from legendary rapper Redman. Of course it does. Turned up with Method Man, never in Wu-Tang, often mistaken for a member of the Wu-Tang Clang.

Clang? Clang. Clang. That was the whitest thing you've ever said. The Wu-Tang Clang. Redman brings us a story. He was on a podcast

and they were talking to him about his legendary episode of MTV Cribs. If you've never watched it, it's still available on YouTube. They turned up to his house and you know what Cribs was like. It was insane. It was ridiculous. Palatial mansions.

So tacky. When they said to him, do you want to do Cribs? He said, yeah. And they said, sweet, what's your house like? He's like, it's a one bedroom flat I share with my cousin and we're cramped in here and we've got some like frozen fish fingers and stuff. Right. And they were like, ooh, that's not going to do.

We'll hire you a house. That's not how it works. Dude, it is how it worked. Redman said we did it and I was just like, I ain't living a fake life. Like I ain't telling people this is where I live because I do not have this much money. Yeah.

And this is like a lie. So he's like, no, if you want to do it with me, you can come and do it in my one bedroom place that I share with my cousin. Yeah. Because there were definitely some that weren't as impressive, eh? Like some that you'd be like, oh yeah, that's a bit. He said it was a massive thing with rappers and he didn't specifically name anybody else, but he's like, there were some rappers who went on Cribs who 100% had houses hired for them.

He's like, people that weren't making as much money but really wanted to appear to be making money and living an opulent lifestyle. And this was, I'm guessing, just before social media where you could be exposed. I guess so. You could get away with it because it wouldn't be someone on Twitter like, oh, that's my auntie's house. Yeah. MTVV Cribs.

I don't know when it finished. It would have been 2000s. Yeah, it was. When my auntie's house. Yeah. MTV or V Cribs. I don't know when it finished. It would have been 2000s. Yeah, it was. When it was at its peak. Yeah. So the first ever episode was 12th of September the year 2000. And yeah, it ran for 19 seasons. But yeah, he said

he knows for certain he wasn't the only person that was on MTV Cribs where they offered to hire them a house to make them appear. Oh, that's embarrassing. I'm looking on, there's a BuzzFeed article. Ja Rule lied. Robbie Williams, fake house. What?

Redman's on this list. 50 Cent showed off an extension of luxury cars. Hired. What? My whole life is a lie. Little Bow Wow. Liar. This is incredible.

Crazy, right? But I guess the pressure is there to look like you're doing well. Totally. And that you're living the life. And he said it's something that, you know, rappers aspire to have. The money and the audience.

But then this is no different than our everyday lives and people trying to keep up and show off their flashy lifestyles. You don't know if they've ticked it up or they're borrowing it. It's all fake. Yeah. Same thing with, like, you know, clothes and jewelry and holidays and stuff. It's like when we were talking about people don't even go to Coachella. Yeah.

If you ever see an influencer with like kids and their house is tidy, you know that's a lie. As if. It's a lie. As if. If you've been to a house with children,

it's impossible to keep tidy. So what? They went to his house but he's on the BuzzFeed list. No, but he did it. He'll probably be on that BuzzFeed list because his episode is so famous like he got trash talked about it

and he was just like, well, I'm not going to lie. Yeah, this is where I live I literally do not have enough money for a mansion why would I say I do that's

yeah yeah that's amazing so today's fact of the day is a lot of episodes of Cribs were faked with rented mansions

fact of the day day day day day yeah I do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do of the day, day, day, day, day. We want to know now when you've made a drunk purchase. Yep. Trade me is a good one when you're drunk.

You just have a little browse and all of a sudden someone on your watch lists you. Marketplace must be dangerous. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, you're scrolling Instagram, you get an ad and you're just like, yeah, I need that. Yep. So Pete Davidson and Colin Jost did this. Pete Davidson, this was a while ago. It was announced he had purchased the Staten Island Ferry,

which, like, you'll see it and you'll be like, oh, yeah, New York Ferry. Yeah, it's a New York Ferry. It's a New York Ferry. It goes from Staten, it goes all around the place. It's that little tip. If you're doing New York and you want to see the Statue of Liberty, you just go return on that and it's free.

It goes right past it. It goes right past it. And then you're like, sweet. How much does it cost to go there and back? It's free to stay. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's free. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's free. It goes right past it. It goes right past it. And then you're like, sweet. How much does it cost to go there and back? It's free to stay. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's free. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it's free. Excuse me, socialism in the land of the free?

Yeah, I think it's free. You just have to have the card. Yeah. I did wonder why 13 million people use this ferry service a year. Well, a lot of people travel like legit to Staten Island, but a lot of tourists just get on and it saves you the paying the... Oh, right. Yeah. So this was the Johnny F. Kennedy. It was decommissioned

because it was getting a bit old and it was announced that Pete Davidson had purchased it for $280,000 US dollars. Jeez. With the intent of turning it into an entertainment venue apparently. Oh, right. However, he has said the news to hand

and why this is back in the news is he said, yes, Colin and I were extremely high. Now, Colin, he was on Saturday Night Live.

He still is on Saturday Night Live. Yes. Colin still is. He's married to Scarlett Johansson. And that's how he met. He's the handsome

all-American looking fellow that does the weekend update and then everyone's like, oh, he's with Scarlett Johansson now and people applauded. They're just like, wow Scarlett Johansson now and people applauded. They're just like, wow. They stood where they were

and they applauded Colin. It's how nerdy comedians have been meeting hot celebrities forever, Saturday Night Live. Saturday Night Live. Yeah. It's how Jason Sudeikis met Olivia Wilde. That hasn't ended well, but...

No, no. You know? Yeah. Before he was Ted Lasso. But this is the ultimate drunk purchase. Yes. The intoxicated purchase, a $280,000 ferry.

I don't believe this is fit for ocean faring. No, they've got a lot of work to do on it. Yeah. So we want to take your calls, 0800 DARS at M, text through 9696. What did you buy when you were drunk? And bonus points if you just turn up

to your doorstep or your letterbox and then you're like, what is this? Because you don't even remember buying it. No. Or you go through your emails the next day like, oh, I bought that. Okay.

Or you think your credit card's been scanned. Yes. Scammed because you can see all these purchases for all these weird places. It was you. And then you find out it was you. It was you when you were drunk. It was you.

0800-DARLS-NAM. Give us a call. You can text through 9696. Your best, craziest, inebri.AM. Give us a call. You can text through 9696. Your best, craziest, inebriated purchases. Give us a call. We want to know this morning, right now, about your drunken, intoxicated purchases that you've made. I don't think we're going to beat a $280,000 public ferry,

a.k.a. Pete Davidson. No, but we'll try. Someone said, when I worked at McDonald's a good 15 years ago, I was on the graveyard shift and a man came in and he just could not decide what he wanted.

Yeah. And then I said, you should have every burger on the menu as a joke and he said, I will have every burger on the menu. So we got him one

of every burger on the menu. I sorted his order out. It was actually a very good looking order and on his way to sit down, he tripped over and dropped them all over the ground. That's not, that's on him.

Oops. How much would every burger, how many burgers, hamburger, cheeseburger, fillet-o-fish, quarter pounder, Big Mac? There's a massive. There'd be like 10, right? There's one with onion rings on it, and there's a massive billboard for it on the side of the Northwestern Motorway in Auckland, city bound,

on that big silo thing on the side of the road, and every morning I think there's a massive billboard for it on the side of the northwestern motorway in auckland city bound on that big um silo thing on the side of the road and every morning i think it's a baby but it's a burger it's a burger okay it looks like a baby's face and then you get close and it's a burger oh what gives it away when you get closer the onion rings all right because babies don't have onion rings of course i keep you can't be the only one that thinks that looks like a baby from a distance. Keep your texts coming in 9696. We'll get to those next. My boss was a little tipsy after some work drinks and ordered four beach umbrellas and six trucker hats.

Okay, random. This is the person that is leading your business. I boozey night on my OE. I purchased a New Zealand personalised number plate. I had no idea until I got back to New Zealand six months later to find it waiting for me. Who's got that much spare cash on their OE? I know that's like, because they start at like, what, $500 or $1,000.

Yeah. Let's go to Elena. Elena, what did you buy as a drink purchase? A puppy that did not exist. Oh. Oh, no, did you get scammed? Yes, we did. Out of $1,700.

Oh. Was it like on, where you get scammed? Yes, we did, out of $1,700. Oh! Was it like on, where was it for sale? NZ Buy and Sell. Oh, right, and so they were just like, here's a cute puppy, and you put the money through straight away? Well, pretty much. We'd had a few too many drinks, we decided we were going to get a puppy, and we started emailing someone,

and they're sending us these adorable little white Pomeranian puppy photos. We got all excited. Oh dear. And basically just, yeah, handed over the money straight away. And the next day when we reread the emails, all the red flags were there. They're both in English. They're supposed to be in Auckland. All of a sudden, no, I'm in Dunedin that day. The amount of money changing, it was pretty bad. Oh dear. And we didn't notice any of it. And I'm assuming those cute white puppies were Google search images, were they? Yep.

Maybe. I reckon. Oh, no. It's weird. I can understand dogs, they play on people's emotions, but I will again say adopt, don't shop. But there's little fake scams for handling cows. Isn't that wild?

Like, oh, yeah, I'll sit and sit by a cow. Elena thinks you're called Jill. What did you buy drunk? Jill. Jilly. Oh, hi. Jilly Poo. Jilly Poo.

Hi, Jilly Poo. How are you going? Good. What did you buy drunk? Jilly crystals. Jelly Poo. Hi, Jelly Poo. How are you going? Good. What did you buy drunk? Jelly crystals. I love it. So we were in Miami and we were down on South Beach drinking this massive cocktail, which was like 10 cocktails in one.

So it was in this massive big jar. Yeah, was it like a fishbowl? Oh, I love those. Yeah, yeah, fishbowl. Nothing good can be found at the bottom of a fishbowl. No, your dignity, maybe. You're never getting that back. Oh, I love those. Nothing good can be found at the bottom of a fishbowl. No, your dignity, maybe. You'll never get that back.

So anyway, we were stumbling home to our hotel and we happened to stumble upon an art gallery, which I swear was put there specifically for drunk people. Yeah. And we purchased, we went in there and purchased these four diving men. It sounds really weird, but they're on the wall and they're in sequence diving down. Oh, okay. And they cost us $5,000 US. What?

Chilli poo. Chilli poo? Chilli pox. Chilli poo, no. Yes, yes, they did. And the next day we woke up and we had this vague recollection of buying these things. So we looked up on the credit card and sure enough, we had done it. When were the four diving men at that stage?

In the hotel room with you or were they still at the art gallery waiting for a sober pickup? No, they were in the art gallery still. We got them shipped back to new zealand oh my god you went you went through with that we actually did yeah right you still got them well funnily enough i do but they're red and you know red is just so out so they're sitting in a cupboard waiting to be recolored i just haven't got round to it. Oh, what colour are you going to go, Jelly Poo? Blue?

I think I'm going to go bronze. Yeah, bronze. I picked it. Bronze is in at the moment. It's all in at the moment, bronze. Jelly Poo, thank you so much for your call. Hope, what did you buy drunk? Or was this the husband?

Hi, yes, this is my husband. Okay. What did he do? So this is the end of a really big night out and he was highly intoxicated. And you know how you just sit on the couch and you scroll through Facebook? He decided that it was a great idea to buy 40 kgs of catnip.

40 kgs? That's a lot. That's going to be a lot because that's dried. That's a stone pus for, like, months. Well, no, because we figured out that my cat doesn't even like catnip. Not all cats do. Yeah, my cat's a bit weird about it. Yeah.

Yeah, and it's been sitting in the cupboard ever since. And he spent hundreds of dollars on this catnip and he didn't realise until the next day what he had done. So now he hasn't lived it down and I get away with online shopping now because I just bring it up every time. Oh, yeah, Jules of Catnip. How many shopping items do you reckon you can use

until you're not allowed to use this? I don't know. I haven't tested it to be fair. Okay, we'll just keep going until he gets sick of it. I guess, Hope, thank you. A couple of messages to finish. I drunk purchased a pig. Okay. I had a boozy lunch with the girls

and bought a top hat. I bought a wooden boat on Trade Me that I wanted to restore which I've never done before and I also outbid my auto bid. Ew. Wow.

Picture stunning Sydney day. Long lunch that finished at 2am. That's a very long lunch. Jesus. Woke up the next day and my girlfriend said

let's go pick up your puppy. I said what puppy? And she said the puppy that you bought for $1000 on my company Amex. Then that dog travelled with me all around for the next 15 years. So that makes it sound like

maybe the dog's no longer with us. Sorry to hear that. What else we got? Can we put a dog on our company credit card? We can do whatever we want. And then we lose the credit card. So you get one good swing. Yeah.

You get one good swing because you're not going to get that card. Drunk Knight made a purchase a few weeks later. A magnet fishing kit showed up.

Boom. Oh. Boom. Although, you're going to catch a gun. How often do you use your magnet fishing kit? Not very often.

Last time I used it, a big nut fell off something in the paddock. Yeah. And I couldn't find it. So I just dragged the magnets around the paddock until I heard thunk, and it pulled it out of this long-growing grass. It worked.

That was pretty handy. Yeah. But still, you used it, what, three times? Yeah, probably the absolute most. Oh, another one in the bag. It's a Versace bag as well. If you enjoyed that, give us a rating and a review and be sure to tell your mates.

You don't sound sincere there, boy. I'm just reading what's written here.