ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 9th December 2024

Episode Date: December 8, 2024

Don't Try the Onion Hack Uber Breakdown for NZ Silly Little Poll - Do You Spend Too Much During the Holidays? Pantone Colour of The Year Holding Space for Ariana and Cynthia Top 6 BNZ Business Accounts Barry and Sabrina's Break Up Statement Fletch Fat Shamed a Dog On The Show: Anika Singh What was the 'IT' Christmas Gift? Hayley Tried Nude Sleeping Would You Jump on a Polar Bear for Your Partner? Fact Of the Day - Coin Week Are You Different from Your Family?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years in the 1970s, the Mr. Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of plague. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Clark would have threatened him. Go and kill him. If you don't, I'm going to kill you and your wife and your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your son. This is Mr. Asia, a forgotten history. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleshborn and Hayley Big Pod.

Great things are brewing at McCafe. The perfect start to every day. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleshborn and Hayley. It's two minutes past six. Hello, everyone. Monday. Fun day, I like to call it. You've had a lot of sleep this weekend. I did.

She's a new woman. She's a new woman. Yeah, I had so much sleep. Didn't overdo anything. That's nice. Refreshing. So can I ask you guys As people who have been Doing breakfast radio

For a while You just wake up Early on the weekends As well Regardless Yeah Okay Especially at this time of year

When you wake up And you can see light Coming from outside And you're like It must be 8 o'clock And it's Half 5 Yeah

You're like cool No I've had lots of sleep though I feel I feel a sense of renewal. My busy period's done. Okay, good. Christmas tree? Today, it's up.

The tree's up. The decorations are on today. Well, your chance, speaking of Christmas, to win are some goodies from Chemist Warehouse. Our game Spray It or Say It. This morning, around 7.30, the top six is coming up. I can't remember what it was. It's the dillies. It's the bank dillies. Oh, yeah, so the girls that said

the girls get off. New Zealand Adult Fun Toy Company apparently were denied a BNZ business account. Yes. Because of the, they've got, like, the terms and conditions say none of that. Yeah, basically it goes against BNZ's policies. What a prudish old bank.

You know what they need. They should see how I earn money. You're telling me that if you were on OnlyFans and earning like hundreds of thousands of dollars, they wouldn't want your money? Or to charge you up the wazoo for a mortgage? Yeah. Get a grip.

Get a grip. Get a grip BNZ. There's grips all around the place. Get a grip. Get a grip. Get a grip. Get a grip, BNZ. There's grips all around the place. Yeah. Get one. But I've got the top six things you should just tell the BNZ that your account's for if it's for an adult fund. Play Zed Eames, Fleshborn and Hayley.

Supermarkets have had to remind shoppers and anybody participating in the brown onion hack that it's not a hack. It's just outright shoplifting. So is this where you would put a bag of brown onions on the self-checkout and say, oh no, you put a bag of kumara and then say it's brown onions? Yeah, well, that's what people are doing. Some people.

I've never done it. Now, RNZ published an article on Friday about this and yeah, they talked to some people that've never done it now well that rnz uh published an article on friday about this and yeah they talked to some people that are doing it um which is absolutely wild and then yeah they talked to supermarkets one uh one spokesperson for food stuff said they hadn't noticed a noticeable increase there was no increase in brown onion sales and because they all the supermarkets have come out and said this this isn't a hack. It is shoplifting. Yeah, it is.

Like, you will be caught and charged, and they monitor the self-serve checkouts. Will they ban you? That was always my thing with friends, because I was never a little pincher. Like trespass for two years, I think. Yeah, I had friends that would steal from supermarkets and stuff. And when they got caught by security, you get banned.

And you're like, oh, I'd hate that. And now all of the stores have facial recognition. And when they got caught by security, you get banned. And you're like, oh, I'd hate that. And now all of the stores have facial recognition. Do all of them have facial recognition? The big chain store, yeah. Do they recognise that I'm a beautiful hottie? When you go in, they actually get an alert saying, watch out, extremely hot person.

Let her put the kumara through his brown onions. I believe if they tag you as a person of interest like maybe you walk out of the store with groceries, then they can be alerted when you walk in. Did it annoy me? Not that it annoyed me. It would be terrible if it was your local supermarket and you stuffed up. Well, yeah, that's why you don't do it.

And then you're driving far and wide to try to get it. No, don't steal. But it's, yeah, hack. It's not a hack. It's literally shoplifting. I, don't steal. But it's, yeah, hack. It's not a hack. It's literally shoplifting. I love that online, because it's going, like, it's blown up online, that this brown onion hack, and everyone's like, not a hack, not a hack. Not a hack, not a hack.

Theft, theft, theft, theft. Yeah. It's a bad hack. You know who's going to, I'm surprised they didn't sort of put it forward as one of her own hacks. Shadow Rappereers around that one. It's like, new car hack. See a car with the keys in the ignition. Shadow or wrap her ears around that one. It's like new car hack. See a car with the keys in the ignition.

Get in it and take car. That's not a hack. That's stealing a car. Okay, I've got a hack to get yourself a new TV. Now Christmas is coming. It means a lot of people are away at the moment. So what you do is you find a house where they're away, the family's away,

and you find by some means a way of getting into the house. It could be like an elbow through a window or something. I wouldn't elbow through a window in the summer year. A&E waiting times are very long. So maybe kicking the door with a heavy booted foot. So what you want to do is you want to make sure that the family's not there, and then they'll have a TV most likely in there,

and what you do is you remove it. Here's the hack bit, and you take take it and now that's your TV. Oh my god, new TV hack. New TV hack. Similar to the new car hack. And similar to the brown onion hack. It's just actually just stealing shit. Don't do it.

I've got a new jacker hack. If you're on the no fly list. If you're on the no fly list. Yes. But you want to fly. What kind of fly hack? Sort of an international, this is a travel hack. Okay. An international no-fly list from some shenanigans

when you belong to an extremist cell. Right. But you really want to travel again. Yeah. Walk around the city until you find someone that looks like you. Yes. Follow them home and work out where they live. Then work out when they're not home.

Break into the house and steal their little blue book with their photo on it. Yes, yes, yes. Memorise the details and then travel under their identity instead. That's a great travel hack. Oh, my God. We've got so many hacks. Shannon, it's like you struggle to find great hacks.

We've just come up with three or four of them. I'm really jealous. You guys are doing good. I'll take notes. Shannon's hacks normally don't break the law, though. Might be slightly ridiculous, but they're law-abiding hacks.

They boggle the mind, but they do abide by the law. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Silly little poe Silly little poe It is so silly, silly, silly That the silly little pole

Silly little pole Silly little pole Silly little pole Silly little pole Today's silly little poll is do you spend too much during the holidays? We asked this based on a study where 61% of shoppers say

the holiday season is financially quote terrifying. I thought it would be almost 80 or 90%. It is. The way things are

at the moment. So much pressure still to spend money. Yeah. To celebrate the season. My family this year we've decided not nothing.

Literally nothing. Me and Aaron nothing. My mum, dad, brother, nothing. We do one present for Aaron's family each. You know, big family, secret Santa vibe. Couple of things for kids and that's it. Yeah. But I also, I answered this do you spend too much during the holidays as in

the whole break? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Weather's nice. Let's go to the pub. Do this. Let's hang out with friends. Do you want to go to the pub when the weather's nice? Oh, you all, I. Do this. Let's hang out with friends. Do you only go to the pub when the weather's nice? Are you all, I'll go. No, no, I said, I didn't ask, do you want to go to the pub? I said, do you? No.

Do you only go to the pub when the weather's nice? Saturday's good for me. Friday I could do. I'm just checking how often you go to the pub when the weather's not nice. Doing a seasonal comparison of sorts. Okay. Look, I'm just saying when the sun is nice, it makes me want to do things. Go out and spend money. You might be away for New Year's, so that's money

because you're Airbnb or hotels or whatever. And then we get a nice long break and I'm like, shoot, I should go down to Wellington, see my friends, see my family, we've got flights. You're just like, whoa. $1,800 for flights. Yeah, just to go to Hamilton. Yeah.

I definitely spend way too much during the holiday. Because you don't have like work and everything to occupy you. Yeah. Try getting a hobby that doesn't cost money. It's just a suggestion. Do you... Shopping. Not based on anything.

Do you spend too much during the holidays? Shopping's not a hobby. I will go on record and say, I don't believe shopping's a hobby. I don't believe shopping's a hobby. Good. We can all agree. Do you spend too much during the holidays I feel like there's a butt

coming it is a fun way to pass the time it better be a hot tight butt and a nice pair of very cheap jeans that you've owned for ages

ruched butt leggings okay yeah do you spend too much during the holidays 87% of people said yes 13% of people said no

boy I'm hoping to hear from them maybe Maybe some money saving tips. Single dudes, I reckon. Yes, or hacks. I regret the early payday and subsequent splurge on loved ones when January payday is so far away, but it's rare time I have with family where we all pretend to be nice.

Do you think that's a monthly pay? That's a monthly pay. We used to be monthly pay. I reckon that's a 15th of the month pay. Amanda says, gifting is my love language. Yeah, and that's hard when you see that your family's not doing each other presents. If you've got someone whose love language is gifts, what do you do for them? We don't. No, no one in our family's love language is gifts.

That's good. It's about food. I really take a good hard look at myself if my love language is gifts. I know, same. I'll be like, am I a piece of shit? I love giving gifts. That's good. I really take a good hard look at myself for my love languages gifts. I know, same. I love giving gifts in a giving love language. Giving gifts is more of an act of service. Yeah. Right?

Is it? No, it's giving gifts, like buying things for people I like, but no, not this year. Jessica, nope, because we stay in town with no shops or internet access. Nice. So they get sort of off-grid is their secret to not spending money. Yeah.

Play some cards and board games. If anyone's actually answering no to this, then they aren't doing the holidays properly, said Fiona. Oh, yeah. I mean, food's definitely more expensive. Yeah. Because you make more elaborate meals. And you're probably eating out more.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I hope so. Every year, said Vicky, I'm already over budget and it's hard when there are so many things I want as well. And do you know what it is as well? The sales. Boxing. Boxing day sales and you start thinking,

I've needed that for ages and you haven't and you've survived the whole year without it. But then you just leave your house and you see the traffic and you're like, I didn't need it that much. No, online only. I really didn't need it that much. Jenna said, my key is buying throughout the year. When I see things people want, I'll pick up a little bit here and there and then save it for Christmas.

Yeah, that's so good. That's a great idea. That's smart. Dylan, definitely. I always walk out with things I don't need. And Jessie said, usually it's mostly on myself somehow. Like when you go Christmas shopping and you just end up buying yourself things.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everyone else can get a small hamper. Yeah, a little token. Tiny hamper. That's a little pop. Play. ZM. Fletchvorn and Hayley.

I look forward to this every year as someone who loves design. And I love colour. So the Pantone colour of the year for 2024 was peach fuzz. Okay. Just think peach fuzz and that's what it was. Your peaches and cream peach colour. Why?

A lot of those kind of like colours came back in, didn't they? Yes, soft hues. I'm not sure. For its use in fashion, graphic and multimedia design. So they announced the 2024 colour last year. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they announced it ahead. They're like, this is the colour that's going to be the colour of the year.

So they've just announced the colour of the year for 2025. I was going to say, because when you said peach flowers, I was like, I don't, because I remember talking about it. Look, it's December and we're absolutely dry. The well is dry. So we rely heavily on these of the years studies. We love an of the year. Oh, we love an of the year. We did all the words of the year. We love an of the year. You know, like when-

The raps. Like brands and stuff are sending emails and they're like, maybe we'll get a bit of publicity out of this and they go to all this effort at this time of year all you need to do is put of the year after it

and there's a 95% chance we're going to talk about it for free water of the year dude absolutely absolutely I'd say it's the water you have at like 2am

straight from the tap no glass straight from the tap oh yeah on the way back from the bathroom apart from it which I was

subjected to on Friday. Excuse me? Yeah. Well we were so responsible on Friday we had drinks for our podcast special. We were so responsible. We were taking waters in between. We were going water for drink, water for drink. Going the boys and girls. That's grown up. But it was almost like, you know, it was hard. Anyway, so this year. It's actually tainted

my drink bottle, your water. It still tastes a little bit. hot Rude It's so rude So yeah, this year, 2024 is kind of the year It was peach fuzz, it was all about soft hues And sort of romance and that kind of thing So it's been announced that the 2025 Pantone colour of the year Is mocha mousse Now think about

You guys love I love the mousse Fletch loves mochas And there's a mousse Where's the moose? Coffee moose Hummingbird coffee moose In the regional koru lounges Yeah they don't put it

In the big koru lounges They don't Just a moose anywhere At a cafe A restaurant This colour moose This Pantone colour of the year Mocha moose

Think about Pizza Hut Back in the 90s The moose machine Yes Think about Valentine's No the moose wasn't in a machine No the moose was The moose was in a bowl. The soft serve was in the machine.

And there was a chocolate one and sometimes you could pull both levers and get it to swirl. I thought the moose was in a stainless steel tray. Yes. Yeah, but that slipped into a thing. A caterer's tray. Who had the moose in the machine?

Valentine's? I don't think moose came. You might be thinking of a soft serve chocolate. Because a moose in a machine would be like. Yeah. A mousse in the machine is. Wildly unappealing for that colour to be making that noise. But you can imagine the colour.

You can imagine the colour. It's a light, light chocolate mousse. Where would you ever use that in like graphic design or like in your house? In your house I can imagine the soft sort of velvety walls, dark sort of luxe. Like curtains or a couch that colour? Yeah, maybe. Maybe a couch, but I could see it on the walls, you know. Very 70s.

A perfect harmony between comfort and glamour. Living in a time where there's so much serious going on. At the same time, we don't want heaviness. We just want this sort of peaceful, light, warm, brown, fluffy little cloud. Because that's the thing. It's not brown like I grew up in a very brown house. Like dark browns of the 80s. Yeah, 70s, 80s browns.

It's just not that brown. There is some sort of weird lightness to it. Yeah, they're saying it's got a quiet luxury. It gives a marker of sophistication and wealth when used in its, you know, in your home design. Maybe that can be the colour of my new couch, because my cats

are eating my last one. No, but you work more on cool tones. Okay, so brown, chocolate, mousse isn't for me. I would say this is too warm. You'd have to turn your crisp white walls into sort of more creamy white walls. No, no. It's a whole thing.

And look, you know that me and Vaughn are happy to spend your money to renovate your entire apartment so we can stop renovating our houses. That'd be nice. I've seen what it's done to both of you. What do you mean? All pass. It looks stressful. You're not taking out any walls.

Yours is like light, renovation light. I know. Yours is, it would take us a week or two at the most, not three years. Yeah, I don't know if I can go chocolate mousse. I don't know if that's my colour. I don't think it's your colour. It is. It's velvety

luxurious colour. But we all remember how brown went in the 80s. It was cool and then, well, we don't remember it, but we grew up in 80s households where, if it was built around that time, everything was brown went in the 80s. Like, it was cool and then, well, we don't remember it, but we grew up in 80s households where, if it was built around that time, everything was brown and then the 90s came and all of a sudden everything had to be grey. Yeah.

Yeah. Everything had to be grey. White and grey. Yeah, white and grey. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. I have still not seen the bloody movie. How?

I haven't seen Wicked. It's not like movie time. You know, it's not movie weather. Honestly, we've had such nice weather. It's like, why would I dive into a cinema for nearly three hours to see half a film? There was some crazy weather over the country at the weekend, but still. Yeah. I don't know.

All these good movies come out in America when it's going into winter and it's cold and snowing. And we're meant to go to see all the blockbusters when it's nice outside. Yeah, I know. I know. I'm going to see it this week. It's just Aaron won't come with me because the moment you tell him how long it is and it's only half the musical, he'll be like, absolutely not. That is wild that it's only half the musical.

Yeah. I mean, musicals are long. Anyway, so Wicked, huge. They've been doing an amazing and very extensive press tour around. Particularly Cynthia Envero and Areva, I keep calling

it Envero, Areva, and Ariana Grande. And one of the interviews that went viral was the one about holding space for the lyrics of Defying Gravity. I've seen this week people are taking the lyrics of Defying Gravity and really holding space with that and feeling power in that.

I didn't know that that was happening. I've seen it, yeah. That's really powerful. That's what I wanted. It's awkward. It's so... And then they get to the point in that interview where even the woman interviewing them is like,

I do work in queer media. It's like, okay, cool. But the whole thing's, no one knows what's happening. No one knows what it means. It felt like it was a powerful sentence, but it was so hollow. It meant nothing. Yeah.

So, and everyone, and then it became an extreme meme online. Like, calling up your boss being like, I'm sorry, I can't come into work today. I'm currently holding space for the lyrics of Defying Gravity. Imagine being that person that is responsible for this, going, like, all over the world. All over the world. It's so funny.

Like, people have been reserving seats in the cinemas at Wicked for the lyrics of Defying Gravity. They're Wicked for the lyrics of Defying Gravity. They're holding space for the lyrics of Defying Gravity. I love that. And it was just that thing because, you know, they've been so emotive in these interviews. And I think there was just their knee-jerk thing to be like, wow, she said something really profound.

And this is the one where Aria Grande, when Cynthia was like, oh my God, I have no idea that was happening. Aria Grande just held her by one finger. One finger, yeah. It's justy just held her by one finger. One finger. It's just perfection. The whole thing's perfection. They'll finally come out and said they have no idea what they were going on about.

Oh really? So even the interviewer, the interviewer made it seem so full on. If she'd just been like, I don't know what that means. It would have obviously killed the moment. And the whole thing about this press tour has been this emotional crying all the time

and touching each other all the time. Yeah. I think they all just dove in head first and three women were sort of bobbing around being like, I don't know what's happening. I don't know what's happening. Just go with it. Just go with it.

Just go with it. So they did another interview where they asked her like, so what was that really about? And then Ariana Grande was like, oh my God, I had no idea. She's just like, I had no idea. And Cynthia was like,

oh, I don't know either. I just, we have no clue what it was. And even the interviewer was like, I don't know either. I just, we have no clue what it was. And even the interviewer was like, I don't really know what I was saying. And it's so good that the three women were just all like, yeah. It just happened. It just happened. So yeah, they were just like, just to clarify,

I just wanted to be there, this is Ariana, because I knew something big was happening and I didn't know how or what it was, but I just knew I had to be there. And then Cynthia said that she was really befuddled. But then after a while, and she was like going along with it, she said, but after a while, I didn't know what was happening, but I was in.

And I remember in the moment asking myself, am I okay? Did I hear something? Am I going to cry again? And then Ariana Grande is holding the finger. It's just one of the most perfect interview moments of the year. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Hayley. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the top six. Now, people might be saying, Vaughn, it's the end of the year.

Is this a lazy move? And I would say, you've seen right through my guys. Yeah. But I'm holding space. I'm going to say I'm holding space because I believe that's what you say. Yeah. I'm holding space for number one.

Can you just, sorry, can you just break down for me what holding space means? In this case, it means I can't think of a number one that's funny enough to be number one. Okay. So I'm relying heavily on the listeners to text 9696 for what to tell your business,

to what to tell the BNZ your business does instead of adult fun toys. I've got five others. Okay. Wow. So I'm holding space for one. So the top six today is all because a New Zealand business,

Girls Get Off, founded by Joe Cummins and Viv Conway. They started in 2021. I thought they'd been around for longer than that. Yeah. I remember when they launched. Hard to remember been around for longer than that. Yeah. I remember when they launched. Hard to remember a world before girls got off. Yeah, it is hard.

But they're like a women-led company making adult fun toys for women by women. Yeah. They're a great company, great girls. Yeah. They're lovely. It's good stuff. Now, they heard from some friends that BNZ business accounts were pretty good. Okay. But the application to open a BNZ business account was denied.

Yeah. The email from the bank supplied to the herald who printed the story stated the BNZ would not be able to progress the application as the business operations are outside of BNZ policy. I'll get with the program, BNZ. What do you think we're all spending our money on? What are you living in the 1800s? It's a business. You're telling me that...

The first time we've been pushed back by a bank, I'm pretty sure we got denied by Kiwi Bank in the past because they didn't want to deal with the nature of our business. I'm sorry, the bank is taking a moral high ground while it absolutely does us from behind? I know.

The nature of business. But they'll happily have bank accounts for like plastic factories. Oh yeah. Anything else ruining the... Chemicals. Yeah, well let's not go through too many longer lists because that might be you about to stumble

over one of the five I do have while holding space again. Well, and just a reminder as well, if you do have an idea for number one, you can text it in right now to 9696. The top six. The top six today is the top six things to tell the BNZ your business does

instead of adult fun toys. Number six on the list, drugs. Yeah. I think that would go against their policies as well. Well, who knows? Sex is the filthiest thing I can ever think of. Yeah, me too. I can't think of anything grosser or anything more repugnant to me

A bank with morals Okay Okay well take your drug money as long as it's semi-laundered I've got to buy my grow lights Yeah You know and my Yeah you need a sort of a business loan My beacons

Yeah It's a hydroponic tomatoes business actually Yeah I make very sweet tomatoes I'm buying these dead tomato plants though They grow massive. Yeah. And they're never tomato.

And yet they never fruit. They're no fruit. And you keep growing them. It's bizarre. Number five on the list of the top six things to tell the BNZ your business does instead of adult fun toys. You run a criminal protection bracket. Basically, you say to a series of shops, no one's going to mess with your shop if you pay us a monthly fee. They pay us it in

cash and we put it into the bank. I think they'll be okay with it. I don't know if they would be warned. They're going to get their front window smashed. I don't know who did it, but it wasn't me, but I also wasn't providing protection because you weren't paying for it.

Number four on the list of the top six things to tell the BNZ your business does instead of adult fun toys, human trafficking. Now again, I don't think that would, yeah,

I don't think they'll accept that either. What if they're good humans? Like friendly human trafficking. Friendly human trafficking. Both the trafficking and the humans being trafficked are very friendly. If you're going to get trafficked,

ideally you're getting trafficked by someone who's quite nice. Do you know that? Who's friendly. Yeah. Who's like, have a drink. We'll stop for a toilet break soon. Yeah.

All good. Do you need some fresh clothes? Yeah. Here's some food. Do you want to call your mum? Number three on the list of the top six things to tell the BNZ your business does instead of adult fun toys. Illegal logging.

You know, illegally cutting down. Illegal logging. So I Googled the biggest illegal mining operations in the world. Yeah. And illegal logging was like right up there with drugs. How do you just go into a forest and illegally log a tree? Because there's forests that are so massive, the government can't keep an eye on it.

But you wouldn't even notice a hole. Rainforest Brazilian logging. Yeah. Like, is massive. And they just go in and they cut down these trees and they like pretty much mill them on the spot. Right. Store them somewhere, dry them out, and then sell.

Wild, eh? Before you know it, it's like an Ikea table. It's a beautiful Ikea table. It would be horrendous ways to see some sort of rainforest hardwood chopped up, mullied up. Pentecost set. And reset into planks of wood to be made into an Ikea shit house bedside table. You want high-end furniture from your illegal logs.

You do. That's why I'm paying top dollar. Or a boat. A lovely wooden-hulled boat like that one in the Espresso video. Yes. Beautiful. You're just banging that boat across that lake. Lovely boat.

Illegal logs. Number two on the list of the top six things to tell the BNZ your business does instead of adult fun toys. Again, we are holding space for number one today. I haven't even opened the text machine. I look forward to doing that next. I've got it open. Number two on the list, fracking.

I don't know if they're going to take money from frackers. I don't know if that's even illegal, is it? And people who frack end up finding gas or petrol. Yeah, they'd love that. They'd love that, wouldn't they? Yeah, they'd love a little cup. They'd love a little bit of that. And number one.

Someone said personal growth tools I see what they're saying Because it doesn't sound like adult fun toys Yes, same with vibrating toothbrushes Yes But if you've got sore gums You've got to have them a little bit thicker You know

Number one on the list Meat based vegetable products The truest crime against humanity Yes No, vegetable based meat products Would be The truest crime against humanity. Yes. No, vegetable-based meat products would be the truest crime against humanity.

Oh, meat-based vegetable products. This is meat disguised as vegetables, which I'm all for, actually. Like when you buy steak fries and it's actually

just thin slices of steak. Yeah, great. Because you think you're buying those thick potato cuts. Yeah. But you're not even getting potato.

Nah. You're getting meat. Meat on meat on meat. That is good stuff. That's today's top six. So it was announced that Sabrina Carpenter and Barry Keoghan. Keoghan, that's how we worked out that it was said, isn't it? Solburn Barry.

Solburn Barry announced they were on a break. And we talked about this last week. We went, what is a break? Do we take breaks? Do we rate breaks as a thing? Or are we just broken up? Yeah. I mean, it's the waiting room to breaking up, isn't it?

Yeah. It is the waiting room. So, yeah, basically they were on a break and then all these rumours started coming out that he's cheated on her. He's cheated on her with an OnlyFans creator called Breckie Hill. Not Becky Hill.

Not Becky Hill. The musician. No. What is a Breckie Hill? A woman. What is Breckie short for? Because Becky is short for Rebecca. Yeah well Rebecca. What's Breckie short for Rebecca Because Becky is short for Rebecca. Yeah, well, Rebecca. What's Brekkie short for Rebecca? What are you, thick? It's Rebecca.

If Becky is short for Rebecca, then Brekkie is short for Rebecca. It was staring me right in the face. Oh, my God. But sometimes you're so thick. I'm a dumb, dumb idiot. Yeah. So all these rumours were coming out. Like, his name was being dragged across the mud.

Do we know this though no well he's come out and made a statement right okay he said I can only sit and take so much he said this one is

oh he recently deactivated his Instagram as well and he left comments being like be respectful but so he reactivated or are the statements through somewhere else

through his marketing team oh right okay I can only sit and take so much my name has been dragged across the internet in ways I usually don't respond to did you just see Brekkie

yeah yeah okay I'll just leave you to finish your cup of tea love the iratech thing went on I have to respond now because it's getting to a place where I don't do the accent

where there are too many lines being crossed I deactivated my account because I can no longer let this stuff distract from my family and my work the messages I've received no person should ever

have to read. Absolute lies, hatred, disgusting commentary about my appearance, character, how I am as a parent and every other inhumane thing you can imagine. So he's basically said like, shut up. He's just summed up the internet there. Yeah. He even said that people

he's even said that people He's even said that people Have been knocking on his granny's door Oh leave granny out of it Oh my Like crazy Sabrina Carpenter fans Yeah have just been like How dare you do this to Sabrina He said he's focused on his fatherhood

He wants his two year old son Brando To be able to look up to him Just basically like, be respectful. Thank you. But did he say I didn't chat? No, not once. Not once. How could he do that to Sabrina? And Sabrina's granny. No, not Sabrina's

granny, it's his granny. I know. I don't know if Sabrina's made a comment yet. Imagine granny opening the door, hello? And they're like, your grandson's a piece of shit, he ch the door, hello? And they're like, your grandson's a piece of shit,

he cheated on us and went to carpool. She's like, not my Barry. Not my Barry boy. He's a good boy. He's a good boy. Apparently,

he didn't even lick the bath. That was a movie trick. He's not even gay. In real life, he's not. He doesn't like a boy's bath juice,

ever. So, I mean, they just came in, I think the thing was that it's just so gay. In real life, he's not. He would never lick a boy's bath juice, ever. So, I mean, they just came in. I think the thing was that it's just so busy. Yeah. They just need to get to see each other and just take pause and take the pressure off. Well, the internet needs a story and a, you know. They do need a story. Well, they're not getting one.

He's kind of, he's really laid it to rest. We're talking about it. The internet kind of came up with a story. The story is not that he's been cheating with Breckie Hill, Rebecca Hill. Rebecca. I'm looking. It's that he has come out.

Is there any basis for why they're accusing her? I'm not sure because she came. She was sharing everything. Wasn't she? Isn't that the story? She was sharing everything on her social medias. She's 21 years old. She shut down.

This was yesterday. She shut down speculation. To put it simply for you all, no, I did not get with Barry. I've never encountered this man in my life. The only thing I've seen him on is on my TV screen from watching Salt Burn. Right, but also I've got a special on OnlyFans at the moment.

Yeah, I hate being dragged into this. I'm sure she's hated all of this free publicity. Yeah. I don yeah. I hate being dragged into this. I'm sure she's hated all of this free publicity. Yeah. I don't think she's on OnlyFans. Let me click this link in bio. Have you got to be a full name?

Rebecca? Rebecca. 12 past seven next on the show. Oh, there is an OnlyFans. He picked it. God, he's a clever guy, this guy. Well, Hayley said at the start. She's an OnlyFans.

That's how people know her, darling. Oh, Brecky. Brecky. Brecky. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Vaughn was invited, but opted out. Which won't surprise you. What a surprise.

I know. Completely out of character. Completely out of character. Just like, yeah, we had enough of each other on Friday. Surely. Yeah, we did. God damn, we saw each other. I worked out in the end just shy of 12 hours almost continuously.

Yeah. It's too much. It's beautiful. It's too much human. A lot of fun. Yeah, we recorded our podcast cocktail special over the... On Friday. Yeah, over the weekend on Friday.

Yeah, look forward to that over the summer. But yeah, on Saturday, we had a little long lunch from 3 p.m. Now, Fletch and I did try to get it at 1. But the happy hour started at 3. That's not a lunch. Now, Fletch and I did try to get it at 1pm. But the happy hour started at 3pm. That's not a lunch. Yeah, it's an early dinner.

Yeah, actually we had an early dinner to merge into. Yeah, well we ate. Anyway, and you left no crumbs. Actually,

I think we left one slice of pizza. Did you? What a waste. Yeah. Cram it in. We was full. Yeah,

full. We was full. We knew when to call it. Anyway, so we were, we went up to the bar. call it anyway so we were we went up to the bar oh Fletch and I went up to the bar to buy a drink

I got oh it was old T-Rex didn't reach into his wallet though did he he did did he thank you he bought this round of drinks

yeah thank you I know he said what do you want I'll get it oh wait so it was just the two of you it was a whole lot of people there it was a whole lot of people there. It was a whole lot of people there

and you two went away and he was like, I'm having a run. Don't tell the others. Quick, quick, quick. Just you and me. Just you and me. I like it when everybody gets their own drinks.

Same. Because when people start rounds, it's forced. And there's 12 people there. You're forced into 12 rounds. Yeah, it's too much. We were also all on different tempos. Fletcher and I were there for a short time.

Other people were in for a whole night. So we were kind of on the same vibe. Anyways, we were at the bar. And then as we turn around with our beverages to rejoin the group, we see a dog. This is a dog-friendly pub. And this dog came in. And as Fletch always does, Fletch goes straight in for the dog with a little pat.

Can I digress? Yes. Dog-friendly pub doesn't mean I want your dog sniffing my crotch. If you're taking a dog to a dog friendly pub, keep it on a lead and keep it at your table. Not everybody wants a bloody dog in the mix. Giant dog. This is where the problem was.

Big dog. Big dog, not a big head. So what it was, I think it was like a Labrador, not Labrador, yes, Labrador mongrel. Something, yeah. Like a bit of a mongrel, but cute. Labrador, not Labrador. Yes, Labrador mongrel. Something, yeah. Like a bit of a mongrel, but cute. Labrador mongrel.

Cute, but when I first saw it, I thought, old and, oof, fat dog. Fat dog, it's a fat dog. But I was like, this dog looked like a cylinder, like an LPG cylinder. I know exactly, I can picture it. Like solid. Like a solid log.

Slightly tapered to head. Head was tapered not even slightly. It should go into that neck. A dog should go neck and then back out to the head but it doesn't. It just tapers like a cone. It looked like it was a balloon or an inflatable air mattress at full inflation.

It looked like you could, if you got too close and you popped it, it would go, but this dog was so nice. So nice. Came up, started sniffing us and playing and we were patting

and being like, what a beautiful boy. What a beautiful boy. And then just out of his big mouth without thinking, Fletch just goes, God, he's quite round, isn't he? I couldn't get over

how almost cylindrical he was. Yeah. With legs coming out of a tube. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I said, hmm. And then I sort of looked and the owners were right there watching us pet their dog.

I thought it was someone that worked at the bar that bought their dog. Yeah, it did look like a bar dog. They brought their dog along. So if this was on a lead, under control, this would have been a clear thing and Fletch probably wouldn't have put a sweat on it. So then I start trying to vamp to cover up the fact that Fletch has just fat shamed this poor dog who looks honestly like his skin is taut across a cylindrical body. And I was like, oh, he's so cute. He or she?

And they were like, she. I was like, not only has he fat shamed, he's misgendered the dog. Double cancelled. And then so Fletch kept talking about, oh, so cute, so cute, so cute. She was the cute, very friendly. She was so cute, but good lord, fat dog. Fat dog. Fat dog.

It's not that you didn't say anything they wouldn't have heard before. No. They wouldn't get it within a sniff of the vets without the vet being like, now we need to have a talk about the diet. But the vets don't know. I'm pretty sure they can't have heard before. No. They wouldn't get it within a sniff of the vets without the vet being like, now we need to have a talk about the diet. But the vets don't know. They're more cuddly. They're more cuddly. I'm pretty sure they do know.

I'm pretty sure they spent the better part of seven years studying the ins and outs of animal health and know that an obese dog isn't healthy. That's why I got the, you don't want your cat having arthritis, you know. No, you don't feed them with love. Anyway, so we sat back down and they moved. They were right

behind us. I'm pretty sure that was because Morgan, Morgan Penn's sexologist was at the table. There was some quite out there conversations happening. Oh yeah. I wouldn't say it was because they fat shamed their dog. I would say they just wanted some peace and quiet. We were having some outrageous conversations,

including the link that we sent to you, Vaughan. You think they might be quite prudish? Yeah, I think I'm quite prudish, but also... You fat shamed their dog. Yeah. And as soon as you left, we definitely said quite loudly, God, that was a fat dog. That's a fat dog.

It was a really fat dog. Play ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Thank you. Have you set up your camera? Yes. There you go. She just asked, she said, can I film? We were like, well, you're a document Hayley. Thank you. Have you set up your camera? Yes. There you go. She just asked, she said, can I film?

We were like, well, you're a documentarian. It'd be stupid if you didn't. Exactly. Something marvellous might happen. And Kida Singh, you are a documentarian and you are joining us in studio this morning to talk about Predict My Future.

Yes. Your new documentary. Indeed. Which is tonight, 7.30 on TVNZ1. Yes, that is correct. Or stream it. Or stream it.

No, it is about a fascinating- Okay, Matt, I'm trying to save traditional television here. Yeah, well. I'm trying to save terrestrial television and get me a show back without Hayley because she got her last one cancelled, but we're not here to talk about that. Single-handedly. Explain what the Dunedin study is. So the Dunedin study has been described as the most detailed study on human health and development in the world.

And it's 50 years old now, right? Yes, half a century, yeah. So 50 years ago, I think they took, was it 1,000 babies? And they're like, we're just going to follow you throughout your life. So it's a long game. We're not getting quick answers from this. No, it's slow's yeah for those that have a lack of patience yeah yeah come on where are the results results how many do you know how many

people have died um that's a really good question a couple have but you know the amazing thing about the study is they have an amazing retention rate so i think it's about 96 percent of its original participants are still in the study yeah because imagine getting to your 20s and be like stop following me yeah because what say someone in their 20s but they're in london do they contact them or they're like hey we'll fly you home or yeah yeah they're all over the world now some of them are even in prison and so the study will fly you know the people who can will fly back to dunedin. People who aren't able to, they will go to them. Wow.

So they'll go to jail. And it was basically to see, like, just to follow the ageing process, how external influences change the ageing process. And you're referring to it in your documentary, Predict My Future, because you've been thinking about ageing as many of us are, I guess, at this stage of life. My back hurts, my knee hurts. Yeah.

My 20s and I feel like, you know. Oh, I was going to say. She's in her 20s. How cute. It's all downhill from here. It is. It is. But also.

Be careful going downhill because the impact on the knees really starts to hurt in the 40s as well. Yeah, that's why I've got a knee brace on right now. Yeah, you've got to walk down the hill slowly. Think about it. Oh, yeah. You should see Fletch walking down the stairs at the moment. He's a case study all of his own.

But also not only your own ageing, right? The ageing of your mother and your grandmother has really inspired this. Yeah, yeah. So I went to visit them in India and basically, like, my grandmother has dementia. My mum has arthritis. So I was just thinking, like, is there anything I can do to help them? But also selfishly, I was like, oh, my God, is this my future? Yeah.

I have no work-life balance. I just sit at my desk, like, hunched. Like, hunched like this. Yeah. I was like, is it God, is this my future? Like I have no work-life balance. I just sit at my desk like hunched. Like hunched like this. I was like, is it too late for me? Am I screwed already? And what's the answer to that question? I mean, I know that this is just sort of a personal thing. Is it too late?

It's never too late. But the earlier you start, the better. So I actually had this blood test done and it showed me my rate of aging. And anyone can get this blood test done thanks to the Dunedin study. Yeah. Really? You can actually, you get this kit and you just prick yourself. I almost fainted, but anyway, you prick yourself and then they analyze your DNA and they can literally tell you how fast or slow you're aging.

Oh, we need to do this. And we're all aging at different rates. We need to do this. We should do this. So does some people. You should like compete. There's an Olympics. Did you know that there's a like leaderboard of who is aging the slowest in the world?

Wow. There's this guy named Brian Johnston. He's like a multi-billionaire. Yes, yes. I know him. I've seen this guy online. I will say he feels intolerable to me. Every now and then you've got to eat a burger and have a glass of wine.

Like enjoy life a bit longer. So he's aging the slowest out of everybody. Yes, he's number one. But he is doing things like- He spends millions a year. Yeah, he spends millions of dollars. He has full transfusions. Yeah, he's got those cryo tanks.

He freezes himself at night. And you know what? It's not going to stop me getting hit by a bus. Exactly. And I'm going to be driving the bus. Drink a wallet's fizzy. Ah, you shouldn't have been on the road, Brian. So what are some of the things that you've found out during the documentary?

So basically we're all aging at different rates. And it depends on lots of things like how you grew up, how much stress you have, what kind of job you do. So people who have like more manual labor sort of jobs are actually aging faster. But the amazing thing is you can actually do a lot to slow down your pace of aging. With everything you've discovered, what would be your number one thing? Like number one thing to slow down your pace of aging. With everything you've discovered, what would be your number one thing,

like number one thing to slow down your process of aging? If it's for people, like quit smoking, eat better, sleep. It's all the really boring sort of advice. So it is the boring stuff. Yeah. But, you know, like the best thing you can do is literally start from birth. Like having kids have the best. Too late. Yeah, I know. So it's too best thing you can do is literally start from birth. Like, having kids have the best...

Too late. Yeah, I know, so it's too late for us. We're all screwed. Oh, my God. I also discovered that, so everyone basically has been, like, affected by lead poisoning in the whole world. Like, we all have lead in our bodies. Oh, no.

And it's, like, locked up in our bones. Yeah, because this sort of stuff fascinates... My brother stabbed me with a pencil and it broke off in my... And it's still in there. It's still in there. So you'll never reach your full potential now. Just kidding. Your brother killed you. My brother stabbed me with a pencil and it broke off in my... And it's still in there. It's still in there. So you'll never reach your full potential now. Your brother killed you.

That's really interesting because there's this thing about metal that metal's never been the same since the first atomic bomb set off. Oh, I didn't know this. They can age metal pre and post the first ever atomic bomb. So are humans the same? Like there was pre-led and post-led. I mean, we've been using lead since the roman empire so it's always been in society but in the 70s we put it in fuel no it was earlier than that i think well not me i go on later early fuel i go on later right because they found out how bad it

was but it reached its peak in the 70s so if you're a gen xer you were exposed to the peak amount of lead in human history because it was just the atmosphere. But we've all been exposed and don't freak out, you're not going to die. Drop down from lead poisoning. It has affected how people age now. It doesn't leave the body

so it's locked up in our bones. Resistance training is a really good way like the scientists. We lift. You've got to lift and stay Like, you know, the scientists. We lift. Bra, we lift. Yeah, exactly. You've got to lift. And stay strong. Bra, we lift. That's a good way. To counteract the lead. To keep it locked up in the bones, basically. Whoa!

So it doesn't start floating around and hit the organs and such. It could, if your bones break or if they start, you know, as you age. Yeah, yeah, it gets a bit brutal. It can remobilise into the body. They don't know the effects of it at the moment because they're still studying it. So fascinating.

Do you know what? It's so fascinating. You're my favourite guest we've had this year. Oh my God! Because I love learning. How many things have we just learned in like five minutes? We're learning so much. I also love that because you're such a creative,

you've worked in the theatre, you write and everything, but now you're obviously incredibly intelligent. It's so nice when you have someone like yourself to sort of translate these really in-depth scientific studies into like layman's terms that you can understand as opposed to like, yeah, when you try to read the Dunedin study, I was having a little, not the whole thing,

but you know, trying to understand it myself. It kind of bothers me. I read a lot of scientific papers, guys. Yeah. The Dunedin study, when they catch up with these people every year, what are they asking them? What are they finding out?

Oh, this was fascinating. So I spent a whole day going through the same process as the study members and because it's multidisciplinary they literally look at everything so i had my teeth looked at my breathing looked at um the study members even have mris done but they also do these like questionnaires so they ask about your your your love life your personal life your job your mental health and you know this is another crazy thing on the study. They have found that by the time people are 45, 86% of people have had a diagnosed mental health condition. Yeah, that's not surprising.

So that means like 8 out of 10 of us will have a mental health condition in our life. And the even more crazy thing is your mental health affects how fast you're aging. So like if you have sort of a mental health issue, it actually increases your pace of aging. I raw dogged off my anxiety medication last week by mistake. But I sorted it out with a deep lorazepam yesterday. But yeah, they seriously, they look at everything. I spent the whole day doing it.

It was pretty exhausting, to be honest. So people in the study don't know they have a mental health issue, but through this study, they're like, oh, actually, you've got... Yeah, they do a full psychiatric evaluation every time they come in, basically. So they've been tracking their mental health since they were 11. Wow.

Which is incredible that you mentioned the retention rate of the study because sometimes who could be bothered if you were doing that every year? And for your parents I guess to be the driver of it, you turn 18 it's like hey you sort of need to keep on going with that on your own now. But they want to because they can see the effect it's having

on the world. Yeah of course. So they see the positive impact and yeah it is a huge commitment but they keep coming in like every I think it's every two or three years that they have to come in. Right. And give a whole day? Now two days, now with the have to come in. Right. And give a whole day? And give up now two days. Now with the MRI scans, yeah. Wow.

Literally like the whole day and plus the MRI scan as well. So they're 50 now, these participants. Yeah, they're 52-ish. 52-ish. And then are we following, is the Dunedin study following them until they die? Yes. Out? Yeah.

Far out. That's incredible. So the study has had like three directors now. So it's like you know, it's a legacy project. Amazing. And Keita, this is amazing. Thank you so much for giving us just a small insight. I cannot wait

to watch your documentary, Predict My Future. Yeah, check it out everyone. See what you can do to improve your own ageing and more interesting fun facts. Thanks for helping us live longer. And better, healthier. TVNZ, the doco is on tonight at 7.30

or you can catch up on TVNZ+. Amazing. Ankita, thank you so much. Thanks, guys. It's Christmas season and that means toys for a guy like me I love toys I still do I get like an email

every two days from Maligo telling me about new sets and stuff and every time I look at them and I'm like this is fantastic

I wouldn't buy any toys I've got Quali and that's all I need Yeah you're not a toys person No Well not only side table toys I think it's because

when I was a kid, yeah, those sorts of toys. In that case, I'm passionate about them. Imagine if Lego bought one of those out. Ow. Ow. You're a loser piece. You're like, uh-oh. There's an article about the toys of like generations gone by.

Oh, the must-haves. Yeah, Barbie's pretty. Barbie Fulton Funhouse. Oh, the must-haves. Yeah, Barbie's pretty. Barbie Fulton Funhouse. What is the must-have for this Christmas? Because I saw that the, is it the Minions fart machine? The fart gun. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the Minions. It's a fart gun and it's like farts. Yeah. 100% that was

it, right? Yeah, I think it is. It's one of the biggest toys of Christmas. I wish we were doing Secret Santa. I'll get you that. You know I would love that. Although I think it's hard to get one of the biggest toys of Christmas. I wish we were doing Secret Santa. I'll get you that. You know I would love that. Although I think it's hard to get. Like a lot of places sold out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're sold out of it. I saw an article a couple of weeks ago, yeah.

Yeah, there's lots of bluey stuff for like the younger kids. Because it was like those like cushion friend things, the butterfly squishmallow. Squishmallows are still pretty massive. Lol dolls. They're going back a bit now. God, the amount of money we spend on goddamn lol dolls. That was my brother's thing, hot rods.

Hot rods. Hot rods, not hot rods. Matchbox car. Matchbox. I remember being super excited about the super soakers at Christmas. Yeah, we got our super soakers at Christmas. How cool were they? Backpack super soakers.

What, you got a backpack? Yeah, and you filled out the backpack. Yeah, you guys are rich farmers, though. You guys are rich farmers. Our best Christmas, and I've definitely talked about it on the show before, was I don't even know, it must have been a great payout from the dairy company that year

because my brother and I got a go-kart, like a proper petrol-powered go-kart, but it was secondhand and my Uncle Paul broke it on Christmas Day by thrashing it. Uncle Paul. He's the dud uncle. Did he fix it?

You know you've always got a dud uncle? Did he fix it? Did he not fix it? He doesn't know how to fix it. So he just broke your toy and that was it. And my sister got a pony. A real life proper horse. And did Uncle Paul break that too? Fat Uncle Paul. It was a bit of a dud. It reared up and stomped on her head and cut

her right across her head. And she's you know how blonde my sister is. Even blonder as a child just had this red blood pouring down her face. Oh my goodness. What a great Christmas. It was like top Christmas to bottom Christmas

real quick. Yeah. Uncle Paul. Classic Uncle Paul. Did he get invited after that? He just moved to Australia. We haven't seen him for ages. Good,

thank God. Uncle. Yeah. Uncle Murray wouldn't have done that. Uncle Murray got a gun for Christmas one year and he let me shoot it like a proper gun.

We went and put cans way, way, way on the fence. Different lives, eh? Different lives, yeah. In the city, you just go outside and play backyard cricket. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah. But there was, every year it was always like the toy that you had to have. Mine was definitely Barbie folding fun house.

It was the doll's house that folded up into a suitcase. Oh my God, rich. So rich. But Barbie's constantly evolving fun house. It was the doll's house that folded up into a suitcase. Oh my God, rich. So rich. But Barbie's constantly evolving that house. Yeah, it's different every year. Because we got

August the dream house one Christmas. Yeah, dream house. And now I saw dream house the other day. I looked at it. It's even bigger. Like if you want,

if you need to renovate your Barbie fun house, it would cost hundreds of thousands of dollars to bring it up to the modern Barbie fun house. I also don't think Barbie went again. Hundreds of thousands of dollars to bring it up to the modern Barbie funhouse. I also don't think Barbie went through the consent

process because there was some balconies on the third floor no railings. There was no fourth wall. No. She was just standing there. It was half a house. The bedroom was open. You'd freeze in winter. No insulation. They wouldn't have passed it. No. You can't have a bathroom that close to the kitchen. This is why we've got the resource management act.

Yeah. Okay. Because otherwise we're going to have a whole that close to the kitchen. Also, the pool had no fence around. This is why we've got the Resource Management Act. Yeah. Okay, because otherwise we're going to have a whole lot of Barbie dream houses and people are going to be falling out of the third floor when half of the building's there. She was living fast and loose. No saddle on the horse, no seatbelts in the convertible, no life jackets in the jet boat, no walls on the two-story home. No. How is she still with us?

She's hard. She's a hard woman. She's literally hard. Have you ever stood on one when it's slightly upturned and the hand's like that? Oh, yeah, one When it's slightly upturned And the hands like that And it just goes Up there with Lego Yeah

So I want to know this morning What was the it toy When you were a kid Yep The toy you were most excited about The toy that you Did you or did you not get it Oh yes

Because it was the worst When you didn't get it Like Was it the Hey Man Masters It was the Castle Grayskull Are you kidding me That was the That was the boy version masters it was the castle grace go are you kidding me that was the that was the boy version of the body you were never getting that because they were

so his brother had castle grace go oh of course right they were rich they were rich a-hole he had he-man and all of his dudes the masters of the universe what was the toy that you always remember either because you didn't get it or because you got it and it was amazing at the time. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. We're talking about the Christmas It toys. The toys that you always wanted and remember. Maybe you

ended up getting them or you never got them. You never got them. You still can't get over it. Forgive your father for doing that. Maddie, what was your Christmas it toy back in the day? Littlest pet shops. Was littlest pet shops like

Polly Pocket but animals? Pretty much, yeah. I'm skirgling it. Did you get it or did you miss out? No, I got it. But the funny thing is my best friend at the time, she said that she was in love with him.

So she asked her parents to some. And she ended up getting like the whole dream house. She got a bucket of pet shops. Only just recently, she's told me she actually hated them. She only got them. So I would be jealous of her. Oh, my God. That cow.

Was she your rich friend? That. Yes. Oh, my cow. Was she your rich friend? Yes. Oh my God, that is absolutely wild. It sucked so much when the rich friend got into the same stuff as you because then they'd always

just get all the better stuff. Ellie, what was your Christmas it gift back in the day? Mine was a cabbage patch doll. Oh yeah, they were amazing. Yeah,

and I really wanted the red headed one. Yes, oh my God, that's the iconic one. Yeah, that was. Yeah, and I really wanted the red-headed one. Yes, oh, my God, that's the iconic one. Yeah, that was just my biggest thing I really wanted. And when I opened my present, I knew it wasn't it because it turned out to be quite flat. And it ended up being a pack of knickers and a Barbie doll,

Barbie doll, a Barbie nightdress. Oh, that sucks. I'm sorry. How old were you when you got a pack of knickers for Christmas? Underwear is the duddest present to give a kid. They're like, I'm just gonna wet or poo in these anyway. And on Christmas you're gonna remind me that I

haven't yet completed qualified toilet training, you son of a bitch. Where's my cabbage patch doll? Sorry to hear. Thank you, Ali. Terry, what was your Christmas it gift back in the day? Morning, Ellie. Terry, what was your Christmas gift back in the day? Morning, guys. It was a high stepper

walking Barbie horse. Oh my God, that was amazing. Remember that? The legs went right up like a dressage horse. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was pricey as well. The old man still gives me a hard time about how much it cost him. Still?

He's still going on about it. Just pay him back, I reckon. Exactly, 30 years later, the same Christmas, my brother got a metal or a die-cast metal Optimus Prime truck. Dude! My brother had one of those. I know. That'd be worth some money if it's still around.

Man, Dad must have spent a small fortune that Christmas. Yeah, I don't know what sort of side hustle he was doing at the time, but we also had a VCR. Oh! Babies! Yeah, well, we're going to tape Sound of Music on Longplay. Yeah, we do. Play ZM's Fletchborn

and Hayley. We're talking about that Christmas it toy that maybe you got, maybe you didn't. Maybe your heart was broken come Christmas morning. Maybe now you can look back and be like, it was insane that I was expecting a $300 gift on Christmas when my family had that amount of money to cover everybody and everything to do with Christmas. I wanted a sticker maker.

Somebody messaged it. Never got it. I still think about it now. They were so cool. Fantastic stickers made by me. That's just making up the... Go on, you know what? Go and buy yourself a sticker maker for Christmas.

They were so cool. Get a sticker printer. Yeah. A label maker. The toy for me was the doll you fed and it shits itself. Baby born it was called. I remember those. Got it when I was eight.

Now I'm 32. Found it at my parents' house the other day. Lord only knows What's inside that thing Yeah It's got the pudding in it It hasn't come out the other end The battery's probably run out

Oh yuck What was it? Did you make up Your own goo poo for that? Or did it come with Like some kind of I think it was recommended You fed it only the goo poo

On brand goo poo Yeah right Yeah Because if you fed it Non brand goo poo Like Play-Doh I don't think it could make it It's way through Oh my god through its primal intestinal tract.

Okay. For me, it was the Barbie jet plane. It was huge and so cool. I still remember the moment I opened it, screamed, ran to my parents, gave them a big hug, tripped over and broke the plane immediately. Well, you're not getting another one. Well, Dad's got some goo in the garage.

Dad'll get that sorted. Do you think your plane's going to fly with duct tape? This jet plane sucks so hard. And look how expensive it is. 300 bucks. Oh, my God. That's 300. Yeah, and it wouldn't even fly.

Like, engineering-wise, obviously. Aviation-wise, it wouldn't even fly. If you strapped engines to that thing, it wouldn't fly. It'd actually be better to buy a drone and take Barbie to the drone. Yeah. Or dangle her from the drone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In some kind of harness.

Yeah. Like parasailing in Queenstown. Yeah. Yeah, hang her from it. You're great. My sister and I wanted doodle bears. Do you remember doodle bears? Oh, I had a doodle bear.

It was a plain bear and you drew on it with the special felt. And then when you were like, time for a wash, you'd wash the doodle bear and it'd come out clean and you'd be able to draw all over it again. Okay. I had a blue one. Mum was against it because she said, we don't do messy toys. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Screw you, Mum. Creaky Galley and Louise. Do you remember her? Yeah. She messaged in that her knees sound like a creaky galley. Oh, yeah.

It was very poetic and lovely. Now, whenever she messages in, she says, it's creaky galley and Louise here. I love creaky galley and Louise. 10-speed bikes was the big thing. A group of five friends were all getting ten speed bikes for Christmas and so I was like the only thing I want for Christmas is

a ten speed bike. Wow. I was the poor one and I didn't get a ten speed bike. One speed or just no bike? No bike. Oh my god. No bike. I really wanted a puppy surprise. Do you remember those? The dog No bike. I really wanted a puppy surprise. Do you remember those?

They had a baby, the dog was pregnant. I didn't get one, but mum made me one. She bought a standard teddy bear, cut its belly open, lined it, then bought little tiny teddy bears and put them in sign.

I still have it nearly to this day. I'm nearly 40 better than the original. Also, the unrealistic thing about Puppy Alive, it didn't come out the dog gina. No, it came out the dog belly. It was like a caesarean section. And then, Fletch, you could tear open the Velcro and shove the puppies back into us. That's not how life works.

Isn't that nice of mum? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. We mentioned earlier that we went on to a long lunch on Sat D. And during this lunch it was discussed somehow about sleeping naked. I think because it's been so hot. It's getting into summer in Auckland, especially, again, humid. Yeah.

And it was sort of passed around the table. There were maybe like 12 of us at this lunch. It was like passed around the table that, oh, yeah, you've got to sleep naked. You've got to sleep naked. And they were asking, like, who doesn't sleep naked? I'm one of them. I put up my hand. I was like, around the table that, oh, yeah, you've got to sleep naked. You've got to sleep naked. And they were asking, like, who doesn't sleep naked? I'm one of them. I put up my hand. I was like, God, no.

I said, I wear a little camisole to sort of keep the girls at bay, and I'll wear some little shorts. I'm a nude sleeper. You're a nude? You know the old thing you'd see on the internet is like, what's your perfect piece of toast? And it would go through all the different things. Or what's your perfect cup of tea?

And it's all the different colours colours and you pick the one. I saw one of those at the weekend. It was how do you sleep? And there was a whole lot of different sorts of tops, a whole lot of different sorts of bottoms, the different combos and then nude and then you commented which one you were on it. Well, one of our friends nude was, I didn't see too many nudes

when I just first went into the comments. There was a large nude representation at this lunch, but one of our friends admitted that he sleeps with und comments and had a little look. There was a large nude representation at this lunch, but one of our friends admitted that he sleeps with undies and full pyjamas. Yeah, undies under pyjamas. Even in summer. No, no, no, no.

Undies and full pyjamas. No, but Matt is not a nude sleeper either. I didn't pick Matt as a nude sleeper. No, not a nude sleeper. Not when your husband's buying five litres of lube at a time. Yeah, you've got to keep your clothes on. Of course, we're using pseudonyms. Yeah, there was a bunch of us, basically.

They all went, no. No, no, no, not for us. Who sleeps in full pajamas? I can't even remember who it was. I didn't know his name. It was Chris. It was Chris. My friend Chris, yeah.

Very traditional pajamas. He had a full Peter Alexander set. He's got many Peter Alexanders. And undies underneath. That's right. It was crass. What is he, a seven-year-old child? Well, that's all we said.

In a cold 1980s non-insulated house. We were like, even in summer? He's like, yes. Yes, full set and undies. In summer? Even just goes to summer pyjamas. Oh, like shorty jars. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So then, and of course, Dr. Shawnee was there being like, no, you've got to do it. It helps regulate the heat. Helps you sleep better and longer. So he said nude. He's a doctor and he's voting nude. And Morgan, our friend Morgan Penn, sexologist. She barely wears clothes in daily life.

Yeah. So anyway, we started this debate. It got quite fiery. Well, it got quite heated because there are, and we've talked on the show about this, many reasons why it is good to sleep naked. Like it regulates your body temperature. You get a better sleep.

You replenish energy levels, regulate various bodily functions, maintain optimal hormonal production, as well as eliminate toxins or reduce inflammation. Anyway, so somehow we all decided upon Dr. Shawnee's advice to take part in somewhat of a social experiment. And those that were pyjamaed sleepers are to sleep nude for seven days. We all shook hands. Some people, Matt was like, no, no, I'm not doing it. But he's on board. No, we appreciate it.

And there was a group chat, mate. Called the Naked Sleepers. Yep. We're all part of it. We all agreed that that night we would change our sheets and have fresh sheets on to, you know, help enhance the experience. So when is the start? Have you started?

Last night. Last night you slept nude. Yep. So I had my shower and I got out and I moisturised and I did all my things. And then at that point that I would usually slip on my things, I just put my robe on, my linen robe. Kimono of sorts. Some sort of a linen kimono.

And then I sort of waddled around because, you know, my thighs touch. And usually I would have some shortstop in them. So I sort of waddled to the bed. She paints a picture. She paints a picture. Waddled to the bed trying to keep back straight so that my boobies are up. Because I've got no support. Here's Hayley's photo in the group chat.

Night one. Here we go. Thumbs up. Thumbs up. Naked. And I whipped off the robe and I jumped into bed and Aaron was like hmm, naked. Because we never sleep naked. He doesn't sleep naked. I don't sleep naked.

Is he sleeping naked? No. He refused to take part. He says he gets cold. Even though he sweats. And the t-shirt makes him cold. He's a big dude. We don't tend to get cold. Yeah, maybe it's the fan blowing on you. Anyway, so it was interesting. I had to sort of work out.

I liked to tuck the sheet sort of around the bits, create a sort of a false pyjama of sorts. Because it would be weird with the boobs. That was my thing. Yeah. Someone said, can you confirm, Hayley, that you are sleeping on a hand towel? Yeah, I went to bed with wet hair, and so I just put a hand towel underneath it. I couldn't be bothered. Yeah. Someone said, can you confirm, Hayley, that you are sleeping on a hand towel? Yeah, I went to bed with wet hair, so I just put a hand towel underneath it. I couldn't be

bothered. Okay, right. Yeah, the boobs, I sort of navigate them. But then we've got the jiggly bits as well. Yeah, you've got to navigate where the junk goes. I don't know, you just get used to it. Yeah, yeah, I think that was the thing that I don't like, the boobs bapping about, but it was good. It was a good sleep. Well, some feedback, because last night, Dr. Shawnee, our friend in the

chat, said, good luck, everyone. Night one of seven, you can do this. Yeah. Hayley was first on It was a good sleep. Well, some feedback because last night Dr. Shawnee, our friend in the chat, said good luck everyone. Night one of seven. You can do this. Yeah. Hayley was first on the group chat. Yeah. Okay. It was quite a nice sleep.

The boobs took some getting used to. Just babbing around in there. Yeah. Yeah. Matt, one of our friends who's not a noose sleeper. Permanently against it. He said it is very freeing. Yeah.

Scared that she already slept. Maybe she's very liberated. Yeah. Jazz said, I definitely rated the fresh sheet feel. I did wake up quite a few times though.

But then you always wake up a few times, don't you? Now Chris, who previously we know had about four layers over his junk, said slept for nine hours

for the first time ever, but I reckon it's jet lag. So that's why it's a week-long experiment. It's a week-long trial. Yeah. But yeah, I think everyone's

off to a great start. Yeah. I think we'll keep you updated on how this kind of goes. But for summer, oh my God, you have to. Even in winter, you just get used to it and it's amazing. Yeah, yeah. I don't know. It's sort of a funny thing,

like getting up to go to wee in the middle of the night and you're sort of like... Just sort of all over the shop. You're plomping about. Someone raises a good point. They used to sleep naked, but they lived in Christchurch during the earthquakes. Never do that again.

There was a couple where they had to abandon their house and they were like... No, you just keep your clothes ready for the next morning in case there's an emergency or they're just ready for the next morning anyway. Yeah. Someone said you've got to let your body breathe at night. You know I'm all about letting the girl breathe.

Yeah. I always let her breathe but in a loose short. But now she's completely free. So stay tuned as to whether this converts me, the social experiment. I love this. Someone said they'll only keep listening to the social experiment if we start pronouncing nude as nude. No. No we say nude. That's how we say nude. Prefer nude. We love nudes. It's not nude

the Swiss design store. No. N-O-O-D. This is N-E-E-E-E-W-D. Nude. Nude. We love nudes. It's not nude, the Swiss design store. No. N-O-O-D. This is N-E-E-E-E-W-D. Nude. Nude. Nude. I like to sleep in the nude. Clay, ZM's, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

We go to Canada now. And that part of Canada where no human being has any right to be. Yeah. You know, like, all the living happens in the bottom, right at the bottom part of Canada, right? You've got your Vancouver's You've got your Winnipeg's Your Calgary's up there

I wanna Quebec, Ottawa, Toronto Down over there It's a place I wanna visit one day It's on the list Hudson Bay Up the top Kind of like halfway

Because Canada's massive Halfway up Yep Canada is really big Canada's huge And wildly Always snow Not always snow

But when it snows, it snows. Fort Severn is the place where a man jumped onto a polar bear. Don't do that. They're one of the most dangerous animals in the world. We love them. We're trying to protect them, but they will kill us. It was at five o'clock in the morning. A man and his wife left their house to look for their dogs

because they noticed the dogs weren't there. While in the driveway, a polar bear lunged at a woman. The woman slipped on the ground and then her husband jumped on the polar bear to prevent his attack. The bear then attacked him, causing serious but not life-threatening injuries to his arms and legs. So he did it to protect his wife. Yeah.

Romantic. That's so lovely. And he's going to be okay. They reckon. Yeah. Oh my to be okay, they reckon. Yeah. Oh, my God. So they both survived. What a hero. Hope he holds it over for a long time.

We. Reminds her every time. She's like, dishes aren't done. He'd be like, oh, my gosh. Ask your mate the polar bear to do them. Oh, my God. Stuff there. Stuff there. How many?

Are you going to play PlayStation all night again? Well, I could go out and fight a polar bear if you prefer, but pretty comfortable here. Oh, my God. Intolerable. Do you know what I reckon? What? Me describing what women do all the time.

Just saying, write it down in your little notebook, reflect on it later. You've got no leg to stand on there, do you? Far out. Yeah. That's what that feels like, that boot, when it's on the other foot. Yeah. Not comfortable, is it?

I like the boot back on the first foot I had it on. Yeah, yeah. That's what I thought you might. We put up a little pole, quick little pole we call this one, just reflecting the story. Would you jump on a polar bear to protect your partner? We're talking apex predator. Yeah.

One of the most dangerous. Polar bears, silverback gorillas, and grey white sharks. Or imagine you're on a boat. Grizzly bears get smoked by a polar bear. They're so much bigger than them. Yeah, or you're on a boat and your partner's in the water and a shark's like, would you jump in? No.

That's crazy. I'm not fighting a shark in the shark's environment. I'll fight it in my lounge. Why don't you come into my party? With a stick, by the way. With a stick. Just with whatever I can get my hands on. Because he's got fins.

He can't hold a gun. You've got a crossbow. But how did the shark get into your lounge? Or how did I get into the sea? In the sea, it's pointless. That might be his lounge. They must be quite confused. My wife's actually got no business

being in that shark's lounge. Yeah. And she will fart about in his lounge. I can see why he's worried. We've killed more of them than they've killed of us I think Aaron would jump on a polar bear for me probably I know, I wouldn't you wouldn't? No, god no

it wouldn't be my knee jerk reaction to put myself in danger either. So you know, like this wife slips, I'd be like I'm coming, I'm coming, just ready, I'm just going to take my rings off, just because I'll leave them for the kids you know? If you were running away from the polar bear and the wife slipped and then the coroner was like, it looks like there was a tripping. You son of a bitch.

But of course. She was slower than me. It was all moving so fast. This is why I do sprinting at the gym. So should Apex Predator be chasing me? I'm not the slowest. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The coroner said, it looks like there's a hand mark. It's like you've pushed her back

to the bear. Yeah, it's like you've sort of gone out of the way and shuffled her towards the bear. No, I was trying to get her out of the bear's path. Yeah, right. What I realised was the path was not what the path I thought was. Yeah. Well, our quick little poll. To be fair, when we were running away from the bear,

she was like, this would never have happened if you hadn't. I was just like, enough. I was like, shit, I was just trying to get her to stop saying that. Enough. Quick little poll. Would you jump on a polar bear to protect your partner? Yes, 41%. No, 59%. Some feedback on it.

Janelle says, partner, no. Cat, yes. If Raleigh was about to get attacked by a polar bear, that's a different story. He's an innocent bystander. Tiny little boy. He can do no wrong. He has no choice.

He cannot protect himself. He's so small. Danielle says, my toxic trait is genuinely believing that a polar bear just wants cuddles and it wouldn't hit me at all. No! Very dangerous.

I think you'd find when you see them up close, they're a lot more bristlier than... Aren't they more like... They're not soft and fluffy. They're like... Their hair is white because it's so thick. It's hollow. Yeah.

I don't think they'd be very cuddly. I don't think they'd be cuddly at all. Bristly. Yeah, bristly. Lots of it. No, because then I would die, and if he's stupid enough to get himself in that situation, then that's his fault, says Carolyn.

But I would for my kids. Yeah, I would for my kids too. Yeah, that's a different thing. You've been to see life insurance, you know, like. From the kids? Yeah, you ain't getting a dollar. No, yeah. You've been to see life insurance? From the kids? Yeah, you ain't getting a dollar. No, from the losing their husband. Is that what you're saying?

Oh, you're saying there could be a potential payday. Yeah. How much do they pay for polar bear attacks? Well, that would all depend on your insurance policy. You read your policy. I don't know if I've got polar bear attacks. Read your polar claws. Excuse me, polar bear. One moment, please.

I've just got to... Can you just wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm a millennial and this is a big job, so I'm going to need to get the laptop out. I can't do this on my phone. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I've got to find the PDF. This is a policy document.

I can't look at that on my phone. I am not opening a PDF on my phone. You monster. Yeah. Can you just wait a tick? Just hold on. Nothing come up, Polar. Control F, bear, click.

Oh, it's a huge excess. It's beer, click. It's a huge excess. It's a grey area. It's such a grey area. Huge excess. Polar bear coverage. I love that Victoria said the polar bear should be scared of me. In a fist. Victoria, that is the most delusional shit I've ever heard.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's time for... Fact of the Day. Day, day, day, day. Today's, well, this week's Fact of the Day theme is coins. Okay. All about some different coins. Coins.

We're starting in Japan today. Are you going to do a day on the is coins. Okay. All about some different coins. Coins. We're starting in Japan today. Are you going to do a day on the chocolate coins? No. Oh, that's disappointing. Dumb. What would you like to know about chocolate coins? I don't know. Why do they turn white?

It's just chocolate. That's more about chocolate than it is coins. Right. This is coin week. Why have they made the coins so out of proportion with the coins that they're actually reflecting? Because if it was the size of a $1 coin, that would be the most disappointing amount of chocolate in the world. Wouldn't it be?

Okay. Well, I've got endless questions about chocolate coins. Well, you can compile them and I'll answer them on the fly. In fact, maybe we'll do a whole chocolate coin week. Yeah. Thank you. Good idea. I'm just saying coin week is giving big calendar week.

It's all I'm going to say. This is like Stanley. For people who have never compiled a week of facts, chocolate coins would not work. That's a real no attitude. I'm giving a lot of no. What I'm receiving is no. Coin fact, in Japan, I've never been.

How many have you been? I have, I'd have got to. Do you remember the yen coin? Do you remember anything about the Japanese coins? Kind of vaguely, yeah. It's one yen. One yen. Yeah.

Yeah. A one yen coin. Do they have a hole in the middle? No. One of their coins has a hole in the middle. Really? That's cool. I like a coin with a hole in the middle.

Yeah, same. More of a ring than a coin. Tiny ring. Because it's always a really small hole in the middle and the coin, comparative to the coin width. What is this, a ring for ants? But it wouldn't be too big for ants. Yeah.

You'd find the perfect animals. Yeah, they do. It's a 50 yen coin and the 5 yen coin have holes in the centre. Two of them have holes. Well, oh, you can see what I'm about to say there on your right-hand picture there. Yeah. In 1955, the one-yen coin went from a brass coin

that weighed 3.2 grams to a fully aluminum, or aluminium, depending on where you come from, which annoys me. Can we decide on one, please? Aluminium. I had to say aluminium. But I do love saying aluminum every now and then. Aluminum.

In 1955, it changed to an aluminium design, a 100% aluminium design. It got slightly bigger, but weighed significantly less, to the point where if you get a glass of water and sit it on the table and wait until it's no ripples and then slowly put a one-yen coin on top, it will float. Wow. Yes, And then slowly put a one yen coin on top. It will float. Wow. He started coin week.

Now they're on board. Everyone's forgotten about that embarrassing moment where you guys want to talk about chocolate coins. Does it have to have that thing though, Manissa? Well, that's why you have to wait till it's flat. Yeah. So yeah, it can float. It floats due to the fact that it weighs one gram

and the physical property of surface tension, the coin can float on water if you place it very gently on the water. Right. As a Christmas tradition, Don't you dare. chocolate coin giving is said to be inspired by the deeds of Saint Nicholas in the 4th century.

Wow. Fact of the day. Day, day, day, day. We could do a whole week on chocolate coins. That's good. How they print onto the foil, the 50 cent piece and stuff. Day, day, day, day, day. We could do a whole week on chocolate coins. That's good. How they print onto the foil, the 50 cent piece and stuff. Yeah, that's with a machine probably. And how many coins in the mesh sack?

The prints on the chocolate. How many coins? And the foil. Yeah, but it just stamps it. No, they stamp the foil. You're such an idiot. You think they stamp the foil. You think they can make something that cheaply and stamp the foil individually

and then get a machine that lines up the print of the chocolate. You're so embarrassing. I am a moron. What would I know? They print the chocolate and the foil. I'm this close to throwing a half-gun coffee straight at your face. God, you're such an idiot loser. So today's fact of the day is the Japanese one yen coin made

purely of aluminium and it's lightweight. You could never get a chocolate coin to float. Yes you could. Oh my god. On what? Mercury. A cup of water. It would float. Oh god he's such an

idiot. Is it a dumb idiot virgin? I asked you not to tell everybody about my virginity. I said I don't mind the insults. Just don't tell everyone I'm still a virgin. Juno is lightweight and surface tension on the water. A one yen coin can float. Fact of the day, day,

day, day, day, day, day. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Brooke Schofield, who is an influencer and a TikToker and a podcaster has revealed that Christmas is interesting for her because her family have all been to prison and she hasn't.

So she's like, I'm quite different to my family. They've all been in jail. Her mum went to federal prison. Her siblings went to jail and apparently her mum loved federal prison. Really thrived in there. Really? Yeah.

Okay. I don't know what she did. She was a drug, it was drug charges and whatnot. Right. Okay. Whereas Hayley has like never been in trouble with the law. Oh, not Hayley. Sorry, Brooke.

I've also never been in trouble with the law. But Brooke has never been in trouble with the law and she just feels completely different to her family. Whereas I feel like, if I think about my family, we were all quite along the same vein. Yeah. Like we were all quite sort of left thinking. But then you do have those families that are like vastly different. Yeah.

And usually it's like one member where you're like, this doesn't make sense. Yeah, yeah. And the more extreme the family is, the more extreme the person goes the other way. Yeah, yeah, totally. So yeah, you hear about people who have like screaming matches and stuff at Christmas because everybody's so

entrenched. Yeah, or they've got a real loosey-goosey family, so they're very like straighty 180. Yeah, straighty 180. I've never heard straighty 180. I like that. Well, this is what I want to know this morning from our listeners. With Christmas impending and we're going to

be spending a lot of time with our family, are you completely different to the rest of your family? And in what way? And does it ever like cause a bit of friction and huge disagreements? Yeah, because it's the time of the year where you're kind of forced into a room with them,

right? Yeah. And you're reminded of your extreme. Yeah. Just got to remember, it's only for a few days. Just a day or two. And then you can be back in the safety of your home and never see them again for another 24 months. 24? Yeah, every second year.

Oh, right. Okay, we don't Christmas down there. Right, okay. See, I don't have this problem, but I'm, you know. Oh, people would. Yeah. I know lots of friends that are like this. I have one friend who's like very, very artsy, very creative, very eccentric,

but then her family's like super square. They're all lawyers, all went to law school. Oh, right. And they're like, oh, here comes the poor one. Yeah, here comes all the artists. Oh, we're creative thinking. And you're like, yeah, that's me. The mismatched clothes.

Yeah. Also, when messaging, I'm different from my family. They are all heavy drinkers and I don't drink at all. Oh, what? So Christmas, I'm different from my family, they are all heavy drinkers and I don't drink at all. Oh, wait. So Christmas, you're just sitting there as they get more and more sloshed

being like... Having some sparkling water. Maybe why they don't drink though. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, maybe. They saw the effects. Yeah, they're like, oh, no thanks,

I don't want a bar of that. Okay, well this is what we want to know. Give us a call, 0800-DARLS-AT-M, text in 9696. Are you very different from your family and does it cause much tension? Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

We want to know if you're completely different from your family and in what way. There's an influencer and podcaster, Brooke Schofield, who said that she's the only member in her family that hasn't been to prison. Yeah, so she goes home for Christmas and I guess... They swap prison stories and prison recipes and she's like, cute. Jo, how are you different from all of your family? Oh,

hi. My family are all real sporty. Like, they are multi-sport, surfing, mountain biking.

They go on overseas holidays and do like cycle tours and not like, not like the kind where you bike from winery to winery but like proper sporty.

Like cycling spandex, like multi-day road bike. What, you're telling me they're not using e-bikes so you can sit your drunk ass on it from winery to winery? No, I don't even do that. So, yes, I'm the potato of the family. I don't do anything. Every family's got to have a potato, babe. You're just the potato.

Just like every meal must have a potato. Every family must have a potato element. Right, so what's it like when you go home for Christmas? Are they like, all right, we're just going to do a bike, a mountain bike before Christmas lunch? Put 5K before Christy Breakey? A little bit of that, a little bit of that. My parents are getting older, so it's not quite

as bad now, but definitely yeah, a few times up and out. Wow. No thanks. Jo, thank you. Anonymous, how are you different than everyone in your family? I am probably the only one that hasn't gone

to court for one thing or another. How did you escape the life then? the only one that hasn't gone to court for one thing or another. How did you escape the life then? The life crime. Behave myself. It was as simple as behaving myself. Pretty much.

But it's even gone down to the next generation now. I mean, I've got nephews that are going to court, and they're in the only teens. And I'm like, I've got nephews that are going to court, and they're in the early teens, and I'm like, Oh, my God. Is your family's name, like, synonymous with ratbaggery where you're from? Hey, this is supposed to be anonymous, isn't it? Yeah, true. We're not going to say the name out loud,

but if people heard your family name, would they be like, Oh, yeah, they're ratbags? Oh, probably, probably. I'm the only one that's kind of, like, semi-not-listening-to-government conspiracies at the moment as well. Oh, God. Oh, no. I'm the only one that's kind of like semi not listening to government conspiracies at the moment as well. Oh, God. No. Not at all. Jesus.

Yeah, God. Oh, no. Okay. Against the Christmas and it's just like, oh, my God. No. There isn't some kind of lost Antarctic giants like that. Wait a minute. We've gone full Antarctic giants.

Full Antarctic giants, yeah. Oh, my God. Wow. Okay, well, it sounds like a fun Christmas for you, Anonymous. It's pretty great for me. Joyous. Thoughts and prayers, darling. Thoughts and prayers.

Prayers to our giant Antarctic gods. Yeah. Some messages in. Someone said, I'm very different to my family in many aspects, but I would say the most prominent is I believe the earth is spherical amongst us. Oh, no. I didn't even think about this stuff. It's got worse in the last couple of years, hasn't it?

Yeah, it has. In the last few years, it's definitely. I'm the only person in my entire family that hasn't lost my licence at some stage of having one. Okay. Wild. Wild, wild, wild. Someone said, I'm looking forward to going home to my family Christmas

where there'll be Trump flags flying and Trump decorations and Christmas Trump decorations. I still can't get out of them why they are such Trump fans. It's got nothing to do with them, but they are. That's good stuff. Trump flags at Christmas. Everyone in my family earns six figures, at least. Not me, I'm in the 30,000 range.

Yeah. Well, at least if you've got a big family, there's plenty to borrow from. A little bit here, a little bit there. Yeah. Just keep living your life. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. We want to know currently, are you very different from the rest of your family? Like Brooke Schofield, whose entire family has been to prison.

And she hasn't. She's an influencer podcaster. Influencer podcaster. There are so many people in the same boat. Yeah, with this sort of crime families. It's quite funny. It would be good yarns over Christmas. Well, you might even save on some presents.

Because do you do presents if they're in prison? No, because they're naughty. No, they can't see anything. Don't you remember? If you're naughty, you don't get presents. If you're naughty before Christmas. If Santa doesn't come, you get coal.

Yeah. I'm the first person in my entire family to earn a university degree and a master's. I was raised by people who were content with government assistance as an income, and I always swore I'd do things differently, and I have. Oh, good on you.

Good for you. And it doesn't sound like they're rubbing it in their face at all. No. Very important. All my family are happy clappers. Love that. And very in your face about it. Oh, yeah.

I am not. And I also didn't embezzle my parents' pension. They did. What? I wonder who's going to hell. The person who doesn't happy clap and steal or the person who's just doing all of it. That is wild.

I'm also the only one in my family that hasn't gone to court for some reason or another over the years. I'm definitely the odd one out because I married the detective. Oh my god. Imagine bringing him to Christmas dinner and everyone's just like, pig. Look at you. You knock.

You're like, okay, okay. Let's calm down. He's a good man. My brother could text in about how he's the different one in our family, but he's currently serving time. So I don't believe he has a cell phone.

Well, maybe they're listing a good morning to our incarcerated listeners. Wow. Do they have the radio in prison? I don't know. Yeah, I think they're allowed the radio.

What's up? What's up, guys? How are you? Leave them alone. What's up, guys? I don't know. I don't know. I'm just saying hello.

Everyone deserves a hello this morning. I'm one of four kids. The two eldest, full-on two, the eldest and the youngest, right? So they are in the middle of that. Full-on weed-smoking hippies, and my brother and I are what we describe as the normal ones of the family. Yeah, okay. Somebody wanted to know if the follow-up about the Trump Christmas family,

are they New Zealanders? I messaged the person back. They said, yeah. Yeah, they're texting in, so they're listening in New Zealand. Yeah, they didn't move here from America. They were born and bred here. It is weird, though, because what is it going to – it doesn't concern you.

It's wild, right? Entire family of tradespeople. I was the first to go to uni. Dad used to come home after shift work while I was doing an assignment and say, drop out and do an apprenticeship. And even now it's still like... Oh, you should have. Yeah, it would have been pretty good.

Yeah. We've talked about this before. God, we all should have done apprenticeships. My family all love seafood. And I don't. That's nice. What are you eating at Christmas? That's nice.

They've got a lobster. They've got a crayfish and prawns and stuff. That's on the mild end of things, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. So I'm considered the black sheep

because I don't get stuck into the seafood. There's more for them. Oh, that's good. I'd love that. I'm the only person in the family who speaks up

and calls out the bullshit behaviour of alcoholic members of the family. Not very popular. Because the whole family is alcoholics. Everyone's going to have

a great Christmas. Oh, I just realised I did the whole show with my headphones on backwards. Well, that means the show's backwards then, isn't it? We're going to have to play this in reverse. Well, should we speak in reverse and hopefully they'll work out the other way? You're a deserter. Give us a review.

Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.