ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 9th October 2026

Episode Date: October 8, 2026

(00:00) Intro (03:20) Baked bean sausage catastrophe (08:00) AI is going to read your mind (11:15) We're rationing needles (15:30) Top 6 - News headlines for a golf ball spill (18:15) Blush trends (23:15) SLP - Do you celebrate Halloween? (27:30) Angus, Thongs & Perfect snogging and Bridgerton News... (32:20) What do you do to get alone time? (39:50) Hayley won a dance battle (44:50) We're not the friendliest country anymore (49:50) Fact of the day (56:02) When did you cheat as an adult? (1:06:30) QLP - What is the best part about staying in a hotel? (1:12:10) What's the sign your getting old? (1:18:50) Hyaley's mad at her boyfriend... See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM Podcast Network. This is Fletchwin and Haley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse. The biggest brands at the lowest prices. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Fawn and Haley, today is the day our live show. Our first of our three live shows in Wellington.

How good. And we're coming to you live from the Polly and Grant Memorial studio here in Wellington. I love this studio. It's inspiring to have Grant Kiryama looking over us. Sort of a mark or of sorts. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, lovely man.

T.K. Modi order. Now, our live show tonight. In the Opera House? Now, we still have some tickets available. And today on the show, we are going to give away a couple of double passes. So if you're in Wellington and you can make it tonight, absolutely keep listening to win those. There's none left in the splash zone.

No, no, don't mention the log flame. Don't mention the log flow. I do apologize. You've ruined the show. Bring a punch on this show. The budget on this thing is honestly intense. We have borrowed the log flume from... I'm just spoiling it.

We've borrowed the log flume from Rainbow's End and we've brought it down with us and it's been installed at the Opera House. And that's how we enter on stage. It's costing a fortune. It's cost the show budget. We have lost so much money on this. So LiveNation.com to NZ for tickets because we just need to cover that.

I was just looking at the seat map. There are some really good tickets that for some reason have just been released. Like in the middle, it's weird. It's a weird thing that promoters do. I've heard this before and you're like, day before we just release the final holds. You're like, what are you holding onto those for?

They're bloody golden tickets. I go to golden tickets. Weird. There's some really good. And otherwise it's the tickets right at the back on the top row. You can get up to all sorts of nonsense up there too. So if you've got your mother's parents and your father's parents living in one bed in your house

and you're an impoverished child, I'm saying hit the streets. That's the Willie Wonka in the Chocolate Factory reference there. Yeah. Yeah. Then get your golden ticket. Get your golden ticket to the show. LiveNation.com.com.com. n'set or keep listening today to win tickets. We did have a semi-big night before the wedding last night.

But it's made us silly gooses because we're a bit hang out. We're a little bit. I had the longest sleep I've perhaps ever had on a weeknight last night. I feel better than I've ever felt at this time of the morning before. Oh, not me. No. Your fletcher's a bit rough. I feel okay.

but it could be a little bit, you know, still going. I'm going to need an eggy bap or something, I think. Yeah, I'm going to need some eggy baps as well. Yeah. First time he's wanted baps in the morning. Haley and I sat beside each other too, so usually we're miles away. So now when we deliver zingers, we can high five. Dealer revealed this morning at 8 o'clock, your chance to win cash the top six is coming up for him.

Yeah, good friend of the show, Earl, sent me a new story out of Australia or a truck tipped over, full of golf balls. Oh, no. Golf balls everywhere. The top six news headlines for a golf ball truck crash coming up. Next on the show, though, you've got an expose, Vaughn. I do. It's a shocking news, New Zealand, to start the morning. Something I was never sort of allowed as a kid because they were more expensive.

Yeah. And you could add your own sausages. There's a clue. Shrinkflation hits. A humble breakfast option next. Play ZM's Flashworn and Haley. Now I've got a distinct memory of the first time I ever had. baked beans with sausages in the can.

We were never allowed those too expensive. Really? Us too. Yeah. Because we had home kill sausages, so if you want sausages, cook them and then pop them in the bake beans. It wasn't the same.

And we had oak baked beans. Oh, guys. I know. You might not understand this because you went to a private school, Haley, but Vaughn and I, our parents shopped at pack and save. Yeah, I'm really having my privilege. My privilege reflected to me. Yeah.

Because we always had these Skitty with saucies or baked beans and you had a Wattie's brand Yeah and Watties Oh Posh, you are Posh I wish you to text my parents and just say Thank you for the upbringing Actually

That we were so blessed Yeah I was at the Wallace's house And I got they divv it up two cans And they divv it up the sausages So every kid had the same amount of sausages Oh man if I looked across at Sam's plate My brother and he had three sausages And I had two

Tantrum was going to be thrown I got the extra sausage Because I was a guest Or she had the fan Because I was there for a plant date and then no one wanted to play with me. Oh, because you've got the extra sausage. So I went to home a movie.

My memory of those, they're so smooth. They're no animal. They're a weird sausage. They're so weird, but so sweet, some delicious. It was low on actual, I mean, they are meat. Moolid. Moolid math.

But I don't think you could. Like a fish finger. Can you can a sausage? Standard sausage? Could you can a sausage? Probably not. Yes, because you can, like canning salmon and stuff, like canned tuna.

It's just preserved in there. You can get that canned chicken. and stuff. Changed in there. What meat is that? God, well, you've seen a lot of that chop, chop chop chicken, eh? Back in the day. Chop chop chicken in a tin.

Well, there's bad news, New Zealand. According to a Redditor. According to a Redditor, um, 3D putty has said, I have noticed a significant shrinkflation in the Wadi's sausages. I think they've gone to, they've lost about a third of their length. They are.

They look chody as. I don't think they've gathered any girth. Sorry for my choice of words. Sorry about that. Choddy little sausage. It's not the first time Fletcher's heard that since we've been in Wellington. Boiya! We sit in side by side, we get to a high five.

We're going to be burned ass, bitch. We don't get to sit side by side. We're rocking high fives on burns. I don't have a chody sausage. No, he's got a big. Oh, okay. He's got a long, but thin of hers. Like a spaghetti noodle.

Like a spaghetti. Like a spaghetti. And limp the spaghetti too. Booyah! Yeah, baby. You joined the burn breakfast. It is. The Bird breakfast.

The Bird breakfast. The Burnton breakfast. Yeah, we're out there. Burning. As the one that grew up so privileged that I had these regularly, I completely think they've shrunk. They're shorter. No, but you could be remembering them bigger because you were smaller.

Like dad's dick. I'm sorry I've put on weight since I was eight. I'm sorry that I'm heavier than I was when I was eight. Don't fat shame me, Cho. I'm just saying you don't want to be going out there with a big multinational corporate company, Wattie's accusing them of downgrading their sausage without proof. Well, then they're going to have to send a... some tins. Yeah, I'm going to use my privilege

here to get some free saucies. Because I don't buy them with the saucies anymore. No, just normal skitties. Where do Waddy's sauce their sausages? That's a good question that I don't think anyone's ever asked. They're very reminiscent of a sizzler. Okay, what is

small sausages used in canned spaghetti are made of a mix of New Zealand beef and lamb. So there's not a lamb in that sausage. These canned products Continuity Manufactured in Canada Wadi's main production facility in Hastings, New Zealand. Hastings!

Oh, lovely. Producer, Carwin, did you know, were you aware that these sausages were manufactured near you? Yes. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, they're very proud down there. They've got a tiny little chodey sausage.

That's their mascot. That's their mascot. I found a story from 2016 where Molderman Darren McKenzie's dreamed of the day he would once tuck into a can of baked beans or sausages and now he's worried that they've... So he was accusing him

10 years ago. Of shrinkflation. Of shrinklation on the saucies. What were the comments after the post on Reddit? Would people agree? No, people weren't. Someone said, I haven't had those for years, but that's kind of the size I remember them being.

Right. So do you think we've just gotten bigger? Is that one of them? I think we've gotten bigger and it's stayed the same. Someone said, I'm a swing voter and I tell you what, whoever can guarantee me a longer sauce is getting two ticks. We should be sausage testing the cans. We should be actually.

We might have to do a kind of on. air experiment. Someone said just checking how old you are because I don't think you should be eating this often. That's definitely

a baby sausage. It's totally for kids, eh? Play that ends Flesh, Forne and Haley. Well, for all the good and the bad

and the bad and the bad and the bad that comes with AI, I think this is probably the worst. Oh gosh. Because the days of keeping your thoughts to yourself could be numbered. But they're

incriminate, incriminalizing. Incriminating. Incriminating. And I wouldn't want anyone to hear that thought process where I was like, Haley, what's the word for incriminating? Incriminalising. And yeah.

So, okay, so they, scientists have unveiled a groundbreaking mind-reading AI. Oh, piss off. So they had a study with participants, and they asked them to look at a bunch of photos, and the AI program analyzed their brain activity and patterns through a scan and reproduce the pictures. Isn't that insane? How far off are we having a pet colon?

that can tell us what our pets want. Because remember when that was like fanciful? It was like an episode of The Simpsons about it and it's been like this silly. But if it can scan our brains and reproduce what we were picturing, surely it can... I don't think what the cat wants can be projected onto the fridge or something.

It's just going to be like food. Miao, want food. Touch me, meow. Please don't touch me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. God, you look fat. But like, listen... Oh my God, I... Imagine my cat's like, hey Lou. Yeah.

You're stacking it on the moment. You just ate. And the cat's like, it doesn't stop you, Fatty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I don't want that. The cat would be sassy. But this could have sexy ramifications too. Why?

What, because it could... If it can recreate visually what you're picturing in your mind's eye. Oh, so you imagine a hot scenario, i.e. you with a celebrity, perhaps. And then print it out on the brother printer. Yeah, yeah, brother. Feels like we're taking a step back there. I don't know that we need to print it out. Ideally, it would pop up in some kind of video clip.

Right, okay. And then you're there. I think it's terrible. We can't have AI doing things that we'd never be able to do. You know what I mean? Listen to this sentence. This is from the professor.

There exists nowadays models that translate brain activity into images and they can even produce impressive reconstructions that preserve the semantic meaning of the image reasonably well. Wow. Now you listen to this sentence. Get out the birth cart, and I do.

I've been married a long time ago. The difference. Humans are just worse. Should we practice and become more powerful? I'm going to think of something and you guys, it's not sexy because we're keeping it professional. I'm going to think of, we'll start simple, a vegetable. Eggplant.

Broccoli. Carrot. Oh my God, we're screwed. We're screwed. Oh no. I'm going to think of a vegetable. Okay. Coley.

I was Stephen Hawken. One. It's close though. I mean, to be fair, there were those Epstein photos, so he's kind of fair game now. He's a fair game. Shannon is a shock at you. We're in the birds, we're in the birds, in here.

The Z&P Podcast Network, play ZN's Flashworn and Haley. We've got a bit of a bleak start to the show. Saucidges are shrinking, AI's reading your mind, And now, apparently Kiwis are injecting themselves with so many dodgy, untested peptides that we are starting to ration needles at needle exchanges. What? So there are needle exchange places, which is good,

because, I mean, this is, you wouldn't even, we're not even including the numbers of people that are just getting needles and shoving them in the bin. So needle exchange places where you'd go if you needed them for, say, insulin or something like that. Yeah, diabetics. Diabetics or all sorts, whatever you're injecting, tested stuff.

They've seen numbers quadruple in the last year alone. And the reason behind it is because people are buying unapproved peptides off the internet. And they need the needles. They're just getting them in the vials. God knows when we talked to Paddy Gower. Patty Gower about this. They're just getting the vials of untested peptides, usually from China. Jaina.

Jaina. Then they need the needles to get them into their body. And they're calling it a guinea pig culture. in New Zealand that we're just like, I'll just try this. If you could excuse my needle-based ignorance momentarily. Yes. You can't use the same needle twice even on yourself. No.

Yes. That's true. Could you boil it in a hot jug? I'm not taking a piss. Oh my God, no. The needle splits. Now, by the way, Shannon doesn't do heroin. She's not an it.

She has a medication that is injected. But yes, you can't use it more than once. No, no, no. No. So you would go to this place. People are going in and using so many needles that people that actually need them, like diabetics or people using medication,

they're running short. So they're having to ration people. That's insane. You've met your quota. And it is because the Ministry of House saying is it's because we're just buying untested, weird things. In Australia, people are ending up in ED, liver damage and all sorts.

They're basically saying it's Russian roulette with your health. Where do you buy needles from? These places. You can go to places that actually the whole, the needle exchanges where you can get these needles from. Because if you buy tests... Were they set up for, because of the drug use

and they didn't want people sharing needles? Yeah, that's one reason that you would do them so that if you are an intravenous drug user, good morning. Hell of a night for you. Yeah, we're not discriminating. It's the safest way. You're right, they're just adding a layer of safety.

But this is terrible. It's so bad. They're saying people it's a spike in this. People are just so desperate for a a quick fix to look better or lose weight. Well, I've definitely noticed it at our gym. You see people and you're like, you've never

looked like this. But the thing is if you were buying... And you didn't even look like bad to start with. And now you're just like... That's what they're saying. A lot of eating disorder clinics are like if we're not regulated, because if you're going on the Wagovi or the OZempic or whatever and you're getting it through your doctor, there's testing. They'll be go, do you need

this? Is this something that is actually going to serve you? Well, you've got to be a certain weight to even get it, don't you? Totally. Although people strap like weights to their feet or put stuff in their pockets, yeah when they go to the doctor so they weigh more. But you get almost naked. No, we do that hon so that

when the doctor weighs us, the numbers a bit lower. Yeah, because when we did that, when we did the sky jump for daffod all day, I was like, how much can I take off? They're like, sir, you're already in your undies. I'm willing to lose them. Yeah, yeah. There's a crowd here. I've got to have that number's got to be lower. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's terrible. It's honestly, because if you were to get it

through a doctor properly, then the needle comes with it. Yeah, well, it's just in the pen, isn't it? Just in the pen, whereas with this, people were just getting these weird, anonymous vials being branded as Retter or Wolverine or whatever. And they're just, we're just jabbing ourselves. I wouldn't, I would, I'd do a lot, I'll do a lot of damage to this body, but I wouldn't be doing that. I wouldn't be doing that. I'm waiting till Red is, you know, done all the testing.

None of the test. Right, and then you'll be on board. I'm just so tired of going to the gym. You still have, no, you don't have to on that one, eh? Surely there's a There's more peptides that'll You know Take care of that.

Right. But again, not till they've Not till they're regulated. Yep. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley. From the Fletchforn and Haley group chat, this is the top six.

So this happened on the Pacific Highway In Australia. In Australia, yeah, Australia In Kulonga look. Klonga look on the Pacific. Civic Highway, there was a closure after a truck carrying golf balls tipped over.

How did it tip over? Golf balls, golf t's. There's a vibrator down in the bottom corner. Yeah, so what's with the little wand? Don't I. The photo of it is there's just strewn golf balls everywhere and then more just caught in the side a little

adult fun toy. Yeah. What's that doing in the same truck? I don't know. Same factory, maybe. Maybe the same factory. And there's some of the stuff. I don't know what these little packages are, but Anyway, Earl sent this to me with a couple of ideas for a top six. I've taken that and I've turned it into the top six headlines for the golf ball. Great.

Number six on the list. Truck carrying balls was a Ford. Are we not going to get this fletch because we don't go? Four! Damn it. I get that. Yeah, Shannon gets that on a golf course. Shannon grew up on a golf course.

She liked that. Yeah, not in a rich way and her dad was the groundskeeper. She wants to want to, she doesn't like, own a golf course. Yeah. You know. She lived on it. Yeah. And that little shed.

Yeah, dad did the lawns. They lived in the shack. They lived in the shack. Number five on the list of the top six headlines for the golf ball truck crash. Company teed off, driver in the rough. Yeah, okay. Oh, that's good. That's good.

I got that. Teat off. Yeah, that's good. Yep. Number four on the list. Company transporting balls used a driver when they should have used an iron. Yeah. I've got it.

Yeah. Shannon should be miced up for this. She's laughing more than anybody. Yeah. Number three on the list of the top six headlines. to the golf ball truck crash. Traffic backed up a fair way after balls up.

That's good. Shannon's giggling. That's really good. Number two on the list of the top six headlines to the golf ball truck crash. Please say truck crash was caused by flat tire. Turns out a truck had a hole in one. Oh.

It's a really good work from you, Vaughn. Yeah. Some of your best. This is top tier. Thanks. And number one on the list of the top six headlines of the golf ball truck crash. Driver says he swerved to avoid

little birdie while picking a bogey and ended up in a bunker. Yeah, good stuff. I feel like the golfers would really love that top six this morning. Yeah, they're already actually tea time, though. Yeah, this time of year you want an early tea time. Is this what you learn at Broadcasting School? Yeah. Is this what I've missed out on?

It is, yeah. Wow. This is what you should have got your hands in right around. That is today's top six. Blaze A ZM's, Fletch Fawn and Haley. Fletch Fawn, I know you guys will be all over this, that it's the spring, summer our 27 runway shows across Milan, New York. Who are you loving this season?

Oh, yeah. The Warriors. How of a season for the Warriors? Different season. But do you know what I did see? Because, yeah, all these fashion shows are happening. Something popped up. And it was like 80s power.

Was it 80s power suits were back? Great. I love that you're up to that. Yeah. And another thing that a lot of people are doing, sending non-models down the runway, Olivia Coleman's been on the runways. Finally.

The lead singer of Queen's, of the Stone Age has been walking a lot of run walks. So finally a chance for us mingers to hit the catwalk. Yeah, yeah, that's next, Matt. Okay, great. Yes. Yeah, great. I love the fast we jump between us calling ourselves tens and the hottest people you've ever lived

or like representatives of mingers. Yeah. But one thing that was trending down the runways is called athletic blush. Now again, you guys will know, blusher in general has been used to sort of sculpt the face. You'd have it high on the apples of the cheeks and nowhere else. Athletic blush that has been all over the runways is people are putting it all over the cheek

right down almost to the jaw and it's to give you the look that I've just finished a spin class or a Pilates class and I'm so flushed with sweat and movement when I haven't Is this what people are doing So people are like oh my God are you on Rita or a Zembuoy No it just gives you a... No look I'm flushed

I've just been to a spin class Yeah, yeah, like I just look so athletic and like I've just been out and about and moving and lively and you're just sat there with your plain cheeks. It's everywhere, like every single makeup artist has been doing this thing where you're going right down the cheeks, see, like right down past the mouth. Oh, okay. We've got, we're doing this and then.

But do you want to be at work looking like you're sweaty and a bit hot? Yeah, and there's a lot of shine as well, a lot of gleam happening. So, yeah, people do look wet and hot. Yeah. Like a humid summer day in Auckland. Yeah, like you've just had a sort of a, you know, a bit of a frolic in a bush. Oh yeah, okay.

And you're going right down to the bottom. But you're in the office. But you're in the office just looking hot. As a woman that runs hot and is often quite red-faced, I get puffed sort of just walking up a set of stairs. I don't think I need to do this. And I would say anyone with rosacea is probably going, finally. I'm on trend.

Prince Harry, who's been doing this for years, has been doing this for years. He's a flush ginger, though. Is it because he's a ginger? Or he's got rosacea. You say, what did you sell, athlete blush? Or it could be, you know, there's that genetic situation that a lot of people of Asian descent have.

They call the Asian flush. A couple of drinks and their cheeks go all red. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. And sometimes down to the chest. It's because of Genghis Khan. Well, this is the time. Is it? What did Genghis Khan do to get the Asian flush?

No, no, no. He had it and he went around Asia. Bangin. Really? Oh, yeah. To all Asian people, 966, if you were Asian, are you a descendant of Genghis Khan? There's a huge chance you are.

The historical figure or the Korean barbecue. Well, we are in the Genghis Carnival is Korean barbecue. Well, I don't know how far he got, Vaughan. You said he could swim. You said he went everywhere. I think he stuck to the mainland. He didn't have a boat. He didn't have a horse.

Okay, well, the Mongols could swim that straight. The Mongolian barbecue. Yeah. Or the Starry and Waggert. The man that the Mongolian barbecue is named after. Right. Okay. What came first, though, chicken egg.

Was it the barbecue or was it the dictator? The dictator. Was he a dictator? He was a dictator? More of a pillager and a... Terrible man. I might have actually sent you all wrong there. It's only 8% of Asians are direct descendants of Genghis Khan.

So you've made a huge claim. I made a massive claim. There's literally a Wikipedia page called Genetic Descent from Gingis Khan and it's like what parts show up. in your DNA test. DNA test, turns out, I'm 8% Genghis Khan. Great Lizzo reference there.

Topical, huh? Only six years old. Sorry, 966, if you are Asian and you want to demand an apology from this white man I will apologize. A broad sweeping statement about all Asian people being

your Ancestry.com DNA results and there's not some sort of Mongolian connection, I will issue an apology. Beautiful. Lovely. That's all it's going to take. Have you guys looked at your Ancestry.com? lately? I actually know I haven't. You're just really white. A lot of

meeting taities from England and I had a blip of Scandinavian. Just a little bit more Scandinavian last time I checked. Oh, puss off. It's gone back down to 1%. Oh, darling. Oh, at least I'm not English. It's mostly Scottish. Yeah.

Shamely. I'm Scottish mostly as well. Scottish and Northern Irish. You're just mostly English, eh? Who lones. Play Z-M. Fletch for them. So silly, silly, silly that the silly little poll today is do you celebrate Halloween? I feel like even in the last like five, ten years, it's just become like such a big thing. Yeah.

Because of, I guess, the American influence. Like, we definitely trickle treated a little bit as kids, but we had Americans who lived up the road from us. And you get to their house. And it was just so amazing. They went all out. And now I'm seeing it everywhere at the moment. People decorating their houses and people. being all spooky and putting things in their windows.

I love it. We went into Look Sharp yesterday to surprise you with some helium balloons. Yes. And there was like Halloween stuff everywhere. Yeah. Massive for them. Well, surprisingly, 77% of people said no. They don't celebrate Halloween.

Wow. 23% said they do celebrate Halloween. So some feedback on that. Katie said, I grew up with my parents saying it was impolite to beg treats from strangers and it stuck. But I have a baby. So when she gets older, I might do it. it. Okay. Yeah, right. What else have we got here? It's not really a thing here like it is in the States. What are we even celebrating? All Hello's Eve, I believe. Yeah, it's very satanic.

Yeah. You know, it's very pagan. It's a pagan ritual, yeah. It was a pagan ritual, but it's, I know that is my time as a teenage witch. Yeah. What happened on All Hallow's Eve? There was somebody to do with spirits, wasn't it? The setting spirits transitioning and stuff originally. It's just about lollies and wearing slutty outfits. That's exactly what's fair. June said, technically yes, because it's my birth down. Halloween, but we celebrate my birthday, not Halloween itself. But often is Halloween themed. Oh, but then also people, you're going to be really competing with other people.

And parties. And parties. Yeah. Last year I ran out of Lolly, said Catherine. This year I'm budgeting for 200 kids. There's a kindergarten and primary school on my street. It feels so nice to make other people happy. Yes, I want to be a fright house.

My neighbourhood does, you sign up to be on, you know, so that the kids don't just knock on random stores. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You just sign up and say, yes, we are partaker. You can chuck a sign up. that says, we don't do this. So stop, stop, stop. I might, like, hang a sort of ghastly head in the window or something. I actually freak the shit out of the way.

Yeah, yeah. Some other feedback on people on what's a little poll today if we celebrate. I was not allowed to as a kid because of Jesus. Mum put up an anti-Hlloween sign and made us go to light parties. Light parties. Light, yeah. So I'm making up for last time by being a witch and extremely festive, says Georgia. Fun.

Fun. Love. Sprawlian. said I celebrate it for an entire month of Halloween and horror movies and TV shows the only time I watch horror movies in fact and every year I'll always find a different adaptation of both Frankenstein and

Dracula to watch. Oh, cool. It's Irish. I'm Irish and it's a pretty big deal here. We actually invented it. The pagan, the Irish pagans. The Irish pagans invented Halloween. Was it the Irish immigrants that took it to the states perhaps? I don't know.

Emma said 100% yes. Always have celebrated it this year. We'll be able 10-year wedding anniversary and we're celebrating with Halloween. I love Halloween. Brian's message and Brian's one of our US listeners and I do up the whole front yard with tons of decorations and passionately hand out full-size bars.

Oh, he doesn't do the snack size? Wow. Full size. I voted yes, I'm an American, says Rachel. I started making my kids Halloween costumes in September. And they have the really nice punkins as well. They have good pumpkins. Yeah. We're all in. The children will be going as Hermione Granger from Harry Potter.

Charrazzar from Pokemon. and spaghetti and meatballs. Do you know I just looked up the top costumes for 2026, Dolly Pardon? Oh, you're so bad. Yeah. Do you think people do her, though, as like a zombie. That's what I wondered, like a zombie dolly pardon. A lot of sales of fake boobies, probably.

A lot of padded bras. Blonde wugs. Yeah. I would just huck a couple of water bombs in there, I think. Yeah, totally. Do that, save yourself some money. Fill them with jelly. So we asked, do you celebrate Halloween?

77% of you said no. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play ZDN's Fletchhorn and Haley There's a whole lot of news I've got to talk about here. There's some Bridgeton news. Now I'm not really over Bridgeton. I've never watched Bridgeton. I watched the first season because that guy was

so hot. Yeah. And then do you remember he left? He's like, I'm going to be all serious and popular actor and then like... I need people to take me seriously. And it was like, jokes, no jobs. No jobs anywhere. No jobs.

But I'll get to that soon Because I can't find the thing Was it in Instagram? Did you send it in Instagram? Oh! I went into our other chat That wasn't in there. This is incredibly unprofessional

Now it's not Bridget and Netflix, here it goes. We've been doing nothing but praising Vaughn For some great work this morning And he's got the ball. Lady Whistledown Society Papers Says, Dear Gentle Reader, Gentile? Gentle. This author writes you with most exciting news

The time has come for us to turn our attention to the matriarch of our below loved Bridgeton's a new series chronicling the romance of a young Violet and Viscount Edmund Bridgeton is underway. Huh? It's got an S in it. Viscount. It's like discount. It's like Discount.

Put it with a V. It's like the S in disco. You don't pronounce it. Disco. Dicco. Oh, right. Let's go dancing at the Dicco. Let's listen to some Dicco music. I think you've been saying that wrong.

No. I want to go down to the Diccotech. It's been around for ages. The love match that started all shall show. soon be yours to see dear reader. This author's show will be sure to inform you of any updates until then yours truly lady. You did a bad Lady Whistledown. I've never watched it.

She's played by Julie Andrews. But she's done, eh? Julie Andrews said she didn't want to do it anymore. Or is she back for this? Well, if this is a prequel, they might be aging her down. Somebody else might be. So they're doing a prequel, so it's not going to be the mum as we know her. No. Because no one wants to watch, but you know, old people have seen. Don't they? You know what I mean? It's about,

that Bridgeton's all about the hot young people. Well, you just turned 37 yesterday. Did you watch yourself in the hotel mirrors? Boom des! Boom des! Yeah! Boom yes! Yeah!

Wow! I will say QT. Bravo on the mirrors. There's so many mirrors in this hotel. Anyway. It's confronting. Very confronting. It's very confronting.

And also 37 is not old. Less mirrors, more time making the shub, keep the water in the shub. God damn hotels and shubs, man. Yeah. I don't want to sound... This is a first off. Probably I want to sound ungrateful, but God damn shubs. Okay, so the Hunger Game Sunrise on the Reaping comes out next month.

I saw the trailer for that when I went to the movies the other night. It looked so good. It's intense. The book was intense intense. The cast, Jesse Plemons, Karen McColkins in there. Dakota Fanning. The young Australian fellow playing Hamich. Yeah.

So the soundtrack's got your Noah Kahn's that's kind of released it because we knew he was going to give it Olivia Rodriguez. was it Olivia Rodriguez that was going to whack out another Hunger Games song? Because she did one before as well. So they've kind of announced what's going to be happening for the Hunger Games. Summary on the Reaping, like songs. Because Lord did the... Who when Lord did the...

Yeah. They've always had great soundtracks. Yeah, amazing soundtracks. But the other big news is that Angus Thongs and full frontal snogging books that made that... They changed it. I don't know this. The Angus Thongs and Purrits. and perfect snogging the movie title

It was called Full Frontal Snogging when it was a book Oh So that's getting a Netflix series I never read Carwin Producer Carwin you're a book girlie I've never read these Yeah they're very cute I feel like probably reading them now

You're a bit Say it Say it Oh to read them now Burn Des Burn Desk But like growing up A lot of Girlies read them

It's very like young adult Coming into age Type of thing Famously her dad moves to New Zealand In her life is over. Oh. So, yeah, we're getting a Netflix TV show, which is so fun.

It's such a, like, cult classic teen movie. Right. And so getting another reboot, I'll take it. Ahead of it was time. I came out in 1999 and was constantly on, like, middle America's books of being banned. It was a bit racy for the... Yeah, one of them is like, something about my nung-a-nongas. Like, all the titles.

Yeah, they're all quite funny titles. They're knocked out by your own nung-nong-nongers. Yeah, I mean, when... Puberty hits. This morning when we were doing our... Chinese lymphatic hopping. Jumping. Yeah.

Gorma's got knocked out by my own Nungan Nungus. That's because you don't have 8% of Genghis Khan's DNA. That's right. So I'm battling. Kept them Nunga Nunga's a little bit under control. So that's a little bit more targeted at a younger crowd, whereas the Bridgeton Reber. Oh, we promised it was steamy for this season.

It's going to be steamy, steamy, steamy. Steamy, steamy. The Z&M podcast network. What you've done to get alone time? Like maybe, maybe you've got kids and you're a parent, or maybe you've just, You just want to get away from the partner. Just to be alone. I'm fortunate enough to not flat.

You know, I was flating in my 20s, but I never had to flat on my 30s. I bet as you get older in a shared space, you just be like, Christ, I wish that bugger off. Yeah. Well, there is a man who's gone to a huge, it's so convoluted, it's so too complicated. He didn't need to go this far to get some alone time. He rings his friend and he says, oh my God, my girlfriend's cheated on me. Can I come and stay with you for a short amount of time? I've got to get away.

And he was like, absolutely, of course. This is awful. I'm so sorry. He goes and stays at his friend's place for two weeks. Then the friend, who owns the house, comes home one day, and the girlfriend's there. And he's like, so you guys have made up? And she's like, what? Turns out, she had not cheated on him.

The friend, the partner of this woman, had actually just lied because he wanted to get away from her and her parents who were staying. So he lied and said to his friend, oh, God, you know, we're having a big barney. Can I come and stay with you? He actually just wanted some alone time away while her parents were staying. And just told his girlfriend what, that he was on a way to work. And told his girlfriend that he was at a work trip. And told his friend that he had multiple lies on the go. It's a web.

Yeah. It's a web of lies. It's a web of lies. Right, but just to get alone time away from the parents-in-law. Don't want to deal with them. Oh my God, your parents are coming. That sucks. It's teed up with this huge work conference that lasts two weeks.

Exactly. He's in the same town. Yeah. Like that's, That's an extreme length just to be like, I don't want to be near your parents. I don't want to be near you right now. But people do this because some people just,

you just stand a little bit of alone time. Sometimes you're just going to be by yourself. Yeah. Okay. I actually think sometimes when you say that you're pooing during the show, Vaughn, you just want a little break from me. That's a fair call, actually. Sort of a double, sort of two great things.

Just five minutes off. Just five minutes alone. A little bit of a break. Okay, well, we want to take your calls now. 0800 dials and Amazon number. Call us. Text through to the studio, 966. What have you done to just get a bit of alone time

that he was going to a work event and then said to his friend my girlfriend's cheered on me and I come stay a few two weeks it all unravels he liked everyone and he just wanted some time away from her and her parents

who was staying Yeah We've had some text messages And I've taken up running And I'm always like Would you like to come for a run with me No one ever wants to So I get all this alone time

And I'm getting fitter Oh but I was going to say Do they actually go for a run Yeah Yeah I've done that before For sure been like, I'm just going to go for a run and these walk off for a bit, sit at a park bench.

Yeah. And then run the last 100 metres back. Get a flush in the cheek. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, get a bit sweaty. You hear about those people that have got partners and they go for a run, but they run around the corner and they cheat on them and they come back all fresh. Oh my gosh. From the sex stuff. Really?

But it looks like they've been on the run stuff. Wow. You are sweaty. Yeah, you are. You've really been working. I go and stay with my bestie for movie nights. That's a nice little alone time. But then you're with the bestie.

away from you're away from the people who are causing you everyday pain. When I need some alone time, I'll start talking to my husband about how the weather looks really great this weekend and he should go hiking because he really enjoys it and it's good for his mental health and well-being. Sometimes if I'm lucky, he goes away for overnight hikes. But that just sounds like you're getting him out of the house so you can cheat, but you just want to be alone. It sounds like to quiet. I love that. 37 years ago, my dad wanted some alone time. He must be really ensuring it because he hasn't come back.

Text to the week. Text of the week. Text of the week. You don't have a dad, but you do have. You do have a $50 animates voucher. Yes. Which will hug you on Father's Day. Yeah. Thanks to animates making happy happen for pets.

Very funny. Someone said I discovered our house has a crawl space. I've kind of put some cushions in there and I haven't told anybody else about it. And when I want some quiet time, I just crawl in there. Anion. Anion. Anon. I saw someone saying that on TikTok that's,

Saturday mornings are cleaning with Mum Day. So when Mum wakes up, the whole house wakes up. Now on Saturday, no one wakes up or disturbs her because they don't want to have to clean. So they pretend they're asleep? So she pretends to sleep in until around 11 a.m. And just get a nice, quiet morning in her room. Oh, I love that.

So if you wake up on Saturday morning, you've got to be cleaning with Mum, so the kids just stay quiet and stay in their room. Okay, well, keep your text coming in. 9-6-096-0-800-M. What do you do to get some alone time? Lots of creative ones here. The Scenic Rute Home,

when you're driving home, you take the long way, maybe you park up, and if they can see where you are, you just say there were some roads closed. Oh, yeah, okay. I used to do that a lot, yeah. Take the long way. I used to do that so much. Get home, be like, not in the mood for it today, and I just keep driving, maybe do a loop around the block, maybe just go to another suburb.

This one's morally questionable. Okay. I have been known to volunteer my time for a charity, and the charity is just not being at home. So they're doing their charity work. They disappear for hours. end but they're not actually doing anything. They're just not at home.

It's just your own mental health charity. Yeah. Somebody else said, Matthew said at work I used to do stock take. And that was just lie down in the abandoned office at the back of the warehouse. There wasn't a lot of taking of stock. Oh, nice. I love that. I told my girlfriend and her friends that I was going to training.

But I went racing in town with my friend. She heard the car redjo played over the cop scanner. When I looked at my phone, 10 miss calls. Oh, no. Also, I love that... Bloody Vin Diesel messaging the show. I love that someone has a cop scanner. Do they...

Yeah, they do you? Yeah. I thought they went off the scanning channels. Yeah. Like, didn't they go digital or something, so you can't do that now? Yeah. The fake work call, I'm at, hurry, I've got to take this, walk out the ranch side, shut the door behind you, walk to a part of the property, they can't see you and just kind of chill out there for a bit.

Sit in a hammock, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's come back and be like, gosh, stressful. I might have to get back on the phone in a moment. Somebody noticed that their local dentist had a very... quiet a cafe beside it. So I'd be like, I've got to go to

the dentist again. They wanted to do another thing. Go down and then just have a nice quiet sit in the cafe. And then if if like your family have you on fine friends or whatever, it looks like you're there. The girls added me to fine 360 this week. That's a whole different ballgame.

That's not just where are they now. It's like where have they been recently and how fast have they been driving in a car? And I will say my teenage daughters invited me. Really? Usually I would be, now I can see how fast they'll be going in cars one day. Oh, no. Can you see donuts?

Can you see here? I remember being, how old's Indy? Indy will be 15 in February. When I was 15. In the back of a boy racer. No, you weren't. Somehow I was in my pajamas. And they were doing.

But you were different. I wasn't a super boy racerie girl, but I was somehow in the back of a boy racer car. doing donuts with meals and mar, I'll say them. Meals and Maher, and we were in the back of this car doing sort of weird donuts up the back of Wainui Amata. Can't remember the guy's name or if I really knew. So you went up and over the hill down into Wainui Amato and doing skits. Yeah, and then we found this paddock.

In your pajamas. And we were listening to Red Hot Chili Peppers Can't Stop. Deni, me, me. We're just being like, this is wild, man. Do you know the chili peppers have had a little mini resurgence with Jen Alphas? Yeah, this is where it starts. Keep an eye on her. I will.

on Family 360. The Fletch morning, Hayley, Big Pod. The Wellington studio this morning because a live show, our first live show is tonight in Wellington at the Opera House. Yes. Afterwards, we are having an official after-party at Dirty Little Secret. You'll know it well. It's the rooftop bar of choice for Wellingtonians.

And yesterday, it's sort of towards the end of my birthday celebrations. We had a big night before the wedding last night. We probably went too hard, actually. Yeah, I did. No, that was... I feel all right. Vaughan was held back by the price of alcohol, which Vaughan is just learning how much things cost

because he's been going out with us. I go to the Hewer Pie Tavern. I get a $13 big pint of Guinness, and that's what I know I like. Yeah, by the time I came and met you guys. Me and we've been having some drinks and stuff, came and met you guys, had some beers and whatnot. You were shocked.

Then we went up to another spot. Then we had dinner. Then we got some balloons. I'd say if you run a restaurant, I'd say if it's concrete, and pretty empty. You want to have some atmospheric music going. We had to provide our own.

It was so... Yeah, we don't say the name of the restaurant. No, I'm not going to say the name of the restaurant. Food was fine, but we got... The film was fine. We got there, had quite a few sarkas. And Fletch was like, we need some vibes. It was viblest, man.

It was viblest, so he was playing Creed from his phone at the table. They hated us. Yeah, they do. They did. And we left there and we all decided we're going to go have a drink, did a little seed crush. Just a nightcap. A little nightcap.

Now, I would say at this point, I'm well on my way, and I'm excited for a little, a drink. It's raining up there. We get in there and I go, oh, God, there's a pub quiz happening. No, it was bingo. It was bingo. It was drag bingo. And there's a drag queen there, and she's on the balls, so to speak, pulling them out.

And everyone's there. She wasn't pulling out her balls. Just to clarify. No, they were tucked beautifully. Into the machine. She was beautiful. Into the ball machine. The ball thing, and she's calling up the bingo.

numbers, everyone's marking their sheets. So we're kind of coming and we go, okay, it's okay, we're here now we're just going to have a little drink, we shuffle to the bar, and that's when I kind of catch wind of my name being said, and someone said, something, something, Haley Sproul, and I turned around

and suddenly the room's looking at me, and the drag queen starts talking to me on the mic, and somehow, and again, I've had a few drinks, and I've sort of missed this, and I've been ordering around, I've been pulled into a dance battle. So the other people were also celebrating birthdays?

It was weird. There was four people celebrating birthdays in a crowd of, you know. And so I think they. One of our listeners was there, obviously, and said, oh, happy birthday, Haley. And then the drag queen was like, oh my gosh, yes, it's your birthday. And other people selling it brought in their birthday. And so let's have a dance battle. To find the birthday victor.

Champion. Yeah. And I was like, what is happening? Get up and music starts playing. And by the way, you don't just have to hear about this. You can witness this. I believe there's a video that's been posted right now. You know Haley's drunk because she's playing with her hair?

I start fronking with my hair. That's her giveaway. That's my giveaway. That's probably home time. There's two girls, they're dancing together. and there's a man who was so musly. And I got confused and I was like, are we dancing together like ballroom style?

So for a while I tried to sort of dance with him. He's not even a bar of man. Well, no, because it's a doubt battle. No, because his girlfriend was sitting at the table. Shocked to hear the girlfriend, by the way. Everybody was, well, la, la. Ollie was his name and he had guns and stuff. But his girlfriend was sitting at the table and,

yeah, when he was around a handfuls, she didn't look stoked. Yeah, I'll say, he danced away from me with Grace. Yeah. And then so I turned to the other girl. There's two girls that they are dancing together and I pull them apart and I wedge myself between them and I start backing it up on one of them

and dropping it low towards the other ruffling my head Yeah they were intimidated There's some old gal on the bloody floor Yeah Jirating And then like that it was sort of over I think I might have lifted my shirt

At some point The crowd judged the winner and you You got the loudest cheer Well it was the claps It was the clap for Ollie It was a clap for girls one, Clapfield 2. I feel like Ollie was robbed.

And the clap for Haley Sprout and I got an absolute hoot and holler giving me the title. I won the stance battle. And I do believe Ollie was robbed too. I do. I think he was, I think you won because maybe

there were some listeners in the crowd maybe or that you... I think I had a bit of you know, I'll say celebrity bias. Ollie was robbed. Yeah, he should have won that. He was the better dancer. Yeah, I really apologise.

So to everyone that was at, did a little secret last night. I hope you're enjoying my performance. You can see me probably doing the exact same thing again there tonight after our life show. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play ZN's Fletchhorn and Haley. Invasion shouldn't happen because apparently New Zealand's

one of the friendless countries in the world. We know this. We know this. We know this. Us in Canada, we're always sort of like globally known as as being really nice. Not. That's not, Canada.

That was weird. I don't even know what it was. It was a moose accent. I was a moose sort of a thing. No, we're second. When we're number one? Last Travelers, 2026, Reader's Choice Awards when it comes to friendly countries. Okay.

We scored 98.46 out of 100. I mean, round up to 100. That's an A plus. You round down to 98, actually. That's excellence, NCA. However, rounding up to 99, because they're just on 98.6.7, is Costa Rica. Oh, okay. And I have been to Costa Rica.

They're very, they're friendly. They have a... Far out. Pure Vida. That's their philosophy of living stress-free. Yeah. in Costa Rica. Do you think New Zealand is because everything is so expensive at the moment,

and again, make sure you're enrolled to vote, everything's expensive at the moment, and, you know, the weather's been a bit funny and stuff that we're becoming unfriendly because we're just sort of like a bit missed. Because we're had enough. We're still up there.

Australia's earning more than us, and we're so far away. Yeah. But we're still nice. Apparently our variety of accommodation, and a lot of it being family run. Oh, okay. Is boosting us up there. farmers markets and small town farmers markets

and their connection to the Māori for things like Poufri and like cultural shows and stuff. Yeah, oh did you see it's been beautiful. Florence Pugh has been absolutely so moved by Māori she said she wants to like try to take it with her moving forward in the future because she received a hucker and a Palfiri when she arrived and she was like, oh my God, like you guys really honour the culture.

I'm actually just feeling a little sad today. If you missed it earlier, I looked on Ancestry.com, I've become less Māori. Less connected to the land. But you're now a little bit Tahitian. 3% Hawaiian, 1% Tahitian. So. It's not all bad.

Aloha and the Tahitian version. That was colonised by the French. Don't look at me. I'm not French. I'm Tahitian. You're Tahitian. What is the Tahitian hello? Fletcher, are you looking that up?

I am. Borobo. I should know that these are my people. No, Borobor is a plan. Urana. Why, like, pronounce, What did you call me? Excuse you.

That's a planet. To say hello in Tahitian, you say, it's I-A-O-R-A-N-A. Pronounce like Yorana. Yorana. Yorana. Yeah. From Rar-R-R-A-L-A-R-Lans. And we've got Kiyo-Rana.

Sort of a changes. Kiyohra, Aloha, Yorana and hello from Scotland. Best countries overall, we came 15th. Greece won that one. Greece has had a summer, though, hadn't it? Greece's had a little bit of it. The Greek islands are nice. Followed up with Japan, Italy, Turkey and Portugal.

Australia didn't have made the top 20 and we were 15th. Air New Zealand was ranked ninth with the US readers. And the UK readers put in New Zealand at sixth place when it came to airlines and we're getting to these destinations. Until they have to fly regionally. And they're like, how much? Excuse you? Excuse you?

Sorry, Auckland to New Plymouth is $700. There's a wellness retreat in Glenorke, which is just out of Queenstown. One of the world's best spa resorts, according to US readers, Arroha. So it's like Arroha, except Arro, space, ha. Yeah, nice, okay. Beautiful. Yeah, so we've got some good stuff. Good, good for New Zealand there.

Do you know just a little something that we... Look at how close you pointed at me. That's rude. You know, you yesterday discovered something in the Kyoto magazine, speaking of your New Zealand. They've got a dolly sealed section. This month they do. And it's got a big hard bit in the middle, and you ripped it open,

and it revealed some words of, like, what you should do, some tourism. Did you... No, it was, hold on, I got it. Because I grabbed a copy. It was just an ad. It wasn't a sealed section. Yeah.

But it looked like they'd gone... I straight up thought it was a sealed section, though, because you could see where it was joined. To learn, you know, some new tips and tricks. A bank ad, and it was about how you were supposed to, like, it was like an advent calendar. You're supposed to flip back the flaps. Right.

Oh, but you tore the whole thing. I tore the whole thing open, which is a little wood. So there's no tips of, you know, more teeth or less teeth or anything like that? No, but it did say Kiwi's spend more on eating out this year with a $17 average transaction. But when we tore it open, we're just all eating out. We're like, that's what I was a Ceyotian. Why did you take the Keota magazine? My girlfriend's mom likes reading it.

She said if you're on a plane, grab me a copy. What, because she doesn't fly? No, not very often, no, she doesn't. Oh, okay. She likes the magazine. Well, shout out. Kind of weird. Kind of weird.

Well, they always say you can take it with you. Or does she want to travel profile on Timaru? Yeah, maybe. Aunt's and eats, how to have a weekend and napier. We know about the eating. It's in there. It's the main middle section. Yeah, 17.

Yeah. The Zat-N podcast network. What's going on? Zatem's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's laudoo do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. It's lies week here at Factor the Day and Factor Today, even if we're in Wellington, Factor Today is bought to you by St. Piers.

Today's sushi today is eight pieces of smoked salmon avo, which is short for avocado. Thank you. Thank you for that, Vaugh. I was so confused until you explained it. Absolutely welcome. Today is about a home-grown lie to finish off lies week, a deception of sorts, about a 1995 documentary made by Sir Peter Jackson called Forgotten Silver. Have you guys heard of this? I remember this.

Yes, I remember this. And it tricked everybody. Yeah, Costa Boats and Peter Jackson made this. They presented it. By the way, they presented it TV One as an actual serious documentary about a New Zealand film legend called Colin McKexon. Kenzie, who was a lost Kiwi pioneer of early filmmaking. He did things, if you know the history of film. He developed colour film before that was done overseas.

He synchronised sound and tracking shots. And apparently he'd done it all in a West Coast bush, a remote isolated West Coast bush. He'd developed all this technology and he'd done the thing. Lovely. So it got sold to TVNZ. It was on Sunday Night Theatre as a serious New Zealand historical. documentary. Yep.

And when it went on, Sam Neal was on it. There was Leonard Moulton, the film critic, Harvey Weinstein, also appeared in it. And they were all straight-faced saying, yep,

it was recognised that he had done this and he'd been a legend and he'd done it all by himself and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So apparently heaps of letters arrived and people were excited about the New Zealand films

have been rediscovered, and this was such an amazing thing. Then they kind of had to come clean and say, it was a mockumentary. I do not remember this at all. I do remember. It was a long time ago and it was like, was it night,

when did you say this happened? It was a Sunday night theatre. But what year? In 1995. Yeah, so it was like pre-internet, like no one really had the internet then. To Google and research themselves. Yeah.

And it wasn't like an April Fool's. Nah. It was just, yeah. So the guy that played McKenzie, the New Zealander, who did all this sort of stuff was a Thomas Robbins. He's an actor that ended up playing, you remember in Lord of the Rings

where you get a little shot as to how Smeagel became Gollum? Yes. And he bashes his cousin over the head with a rock. Deagle? It was the guy that played Deagle in Lord of the Rings.

Thomas Robbins. Smigle's brother's name's Deagle. Smeagel and Degel. I'm sorry. Smigle's parents need to get a bit more creative. Smigle, Deagle and Rangel. From my Lord of the Rings knowledge. I have Stephen Colbert's listening to the show

because he's in the country and I know he's a huge fan of the show and Lord of the Rings. Yeah, yeah. Good morning, Stevie boy. You can confirm if they were cousins or brothers. But he's the one that, yeah, finds the ring originally. Yeah, right. And smigled donks him on the head to get the rock.

Where do we think Stephen Colby is staying? Is it the zebra backpackers? It's on over the road? No. It was on Miramar. Somebody, he put up that video. Right. Saying a vote for Jimmy Kimmel for something.

Right. Someone was like, I know where that is at some Miramar. But we're not going to go stalking. We're not going to go stalking. We're not going to go. We should. We should. Oh, God.

He should come to the show tonight. If you know Stephen's I'd try to go to Matilda. He would be, it's a bloody good musical. Well, no, but he won't be going. We'd not go to the FVH Law Show and go to Matilda. I would love to see Matilda. No, because remember I'm sending the laxative muffins.

Such a trunch ball thing to do. That is so, that's very nausey. Yeah, but Bruce Bogot is going to eat all the muffins. And then people will have nothing better to do, but come to Fletchhorn and Haley Live and snap up the remaining tickets. I don't know, unless we just, us and our crowd, we all go over. It's a bloody good musical. During a week.

We sort of get the understudies to all come to FVH, live and do a few musical numbers from Matilda. Oh, that'd be great. We go over with our 1,000. Then it's just like, you might as well have just come to us. Do a cross-over show. We'll do a crossover Matilda show. We'll work on this. Yeah, okay, great. We'll work on this. Yeah. Could do.

So, it was all, it came out. It was unveiled that it was a hoax. People were pretty piss, because people don't like being fooled. No. People don't like being tricked. TV and Z backed out of a repeat screening. Oh, like, we're not going to do it. Is it available, like, to watch now?

It is. It's all on YouTube. I just searched. Oh, I'm forgotten silver. And you can find it. It's online to give that a watch. It was brilliantly done. I remember that. It was very, very cleverly done. Well before he made his Bargillians from the Lord of the Rings of the Albert movies, Petter Jackson. Is he in the bars now? Bar Gillian.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He is in the Bargillions. I thought there were any trillionaires. No, no, no, trillionaires, barjillionaires, gazillionaires. Brazilians are at the top. Brazilianers. Oh, my gosh. They're the hottest. That's where you've got so much money. your money actually just turns it to Brazilians.

I'm wearing a mini skirt on stage tonight. I should have got a Brazilian ear, I think. You get quite a lot. Okay, we are just having people request refunds for the front row tickets. Jesus, they're going to go to Matilda. It's full Bush. No Bush over at Matilda. It's mostly because of Haley's Bush.

Yeah, but that's what I'm saying. They're going to go to Matilda. Right, yeah. They're guaranteed not to be confronted with Bush. Yeah, we don't need to see that. Unless Trunchball has a wardrobe malfunction. Trunch Bill's got Bush. The other place Trunch Bulls never pubically maintained.

Never. Well, today's... You think she's not taking care of that mold growing, the hair growing of the mold on her face? You think she's ever thought of whipping a shick down there? Take care of your bikini line, trunch ball. So today's fact of the day is, to finish off Lies Week, is that in 1995, Peter Jackson and Costa Boats filled the nation with a documentary called Forgotten Silver. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Ah, do-da-da-do-do-do-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-dda. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do we want to know right now when did you cheat as an adult and I don't mean like extramarital love affairs I mean maybe you took a little shortcut maybe you took a lead a little cheity weedy there's a fitness influencer now don't make me sign up for the New York Times but she did a marathon do you need the New York Times because I'm I've got a member. Yeah, and it's not for the games. Yeah, I'm just a better person. Shannon's subscribed, but that's for the games. She doesn't read a single bit about American politics. No, I'm going to, I'm going to... She's a Chinese influencer.

Hang on a moment. She was in the Berlin Marathon. Okay. Now, she said she finished with the best time of nearly five hours. So, you know, it's not that fast. Says the woman who's never run a marathon. She's an influencer. She did five hours.

I mean, I don't want to throw stones. three and a half hours, did it once. Wow. That is not fast. So she has 500,000 followers on social media. Her name is Sun Yun Yun. She is Chinese Fitness and, I think I said that really well. Sun Yunian.

Sun Yun. I wouldn't have said it again and again, though. Oh, did you hear Shannon laughing? Canceled. We got her. We finally found a reason to cancel Shannon. Sun Yun Yun. She's known online as a beer.

fitness influencer. She did this marathon, personal best, all these photos to her 500,000 followers. Then a photo comes out of her hitching a ride between 35 kilometres and 40 kilometres.

So the end... She had that wall. On an electric bicycle. So she's perched on the back. Wait, so she did five hours even with a 5K ride. That's nuts. Slug O'Sha. She's come out.

She says, So this came out and someone said, I'm sorry, you did not. Berlin Marathon got this information, revoked her time and her medal and everything. So she came out, she said, I won't make any excuses for this behaviour. I was feeling physically unwell on the course. Not an excuse. My attempt to take a shortcut was disrespectful to the fairness of the competition. She's feeling deeply guilty about it.

She's dropped sponsorships because she's a... I just saw that headline. She's a fitness influencer and so some... sports brands have dropped her as a pulled back. Who was the celebrity that ran the New York marathon but they must have taken a taxi or the subway? Yes, not Harry Styles.

Katie Holmes? Katie Holmes? No, I feel bad for saying it was. Harry Styles runs like crazy. He does the full marathons. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I would do this and I actually did do this as a kid when we did the triathlon. I was on the bike portion.

I think Jess ran and someone else swam. And on the like portion, I saw a shortcut and it would take me from going around this big loopy bit by the beach directly across the park to like the next checkpoint. And I just took it and I came third.

How old were you? 10 maybe? Yeah. Yeah. And I'll just admit that here and now. We always had that opportunity as well because I went to New Plymouth Boys High School. It's right by Pukukukuta Park, massive park. Cut through. And they would make you run around and you just like go

through the park. Short cuts. Yeah. But I want to know when you've cheated as an adult. Maybe it was a test, maybe it was

something you copied off of a friend. Something at work. Yeah, you took a little shortcut. You lied. Maybe you've done this on a race.

Oh, I cheat all the time on those things we have to watch. Oh, the IT. The IT security videos. Shannon tells us if it's A, B, C, or D.

Yeah, yeah. Security. Yeah. Okay, so... Well, maybe a friend of mine was doing September, you know, workplace is often

and they get your steps up and all that kind of stuff and he used to send his daughter to school with his footboard on. I know someone that put it on their dog's collar and just took it down to the dog cover and threw a ball a few times. Okay, well, oh 800 dials at him

we want to take your calls now. You can text through as well, 9-696. When did you cheat as an adult? Pub quiz last month, we had a phone on one of the chairs and we just had we've done this, everyone. We just had no, they just had AI open listening the entire time and it was given

them in time answers. No, we had big heart of James Googled a couple of answers. He was good though. He was subtle. He was so subtle. He wasn't. Settle. He's not subtle. Yeah. Somehow. Our work bake off. I bought a cake from a cakeery.

Mike did this, remember? Mike got my mum to make her famous Buklava for his work bake thing. Yeah. Sold it as his own. So, did it, took it from a bakery, still came second. Shame to the bakery. Shame to the bakery. Shame to the bakery, yeah.

My husband and I do a weight loss competition every February after the summer break. I was weigh in with my phone and keys and a few other heavy things in my pocket. Yeah. Well, no, this is what I said people are doing when they go to the doctor to get on the jabs. Yeah. Because you've got to be a certain BMI or whatever it is. Drink four litres of water and wear something heavy and pad your bra with rocks. So I'm saying, I won't go into details of who was running the competition,

but the school runs one of this competition where kids collect stickers from things and put them on a certificate. Okay. Take them in. The more stickers, the more rewards the school get. Let's just say I have access to a printer that can print stickers. Brilliant. My kids won that competition all the time. Fantasy rugby league at work.

I use my brothers log in to make trades for my team after the deadline. I don't know how that works. I've got some mates that do that fantasy rugby later. People take it very seriously. Yes, they do. They do. Okay, did a park run, finished with the personal best, posted it on Strava, forgot to turn the tracker off, drove home with it still going.

And it worked out my average... My average speed and it made it way faster. I wasn't driving home very fast. I got the kudos. Do you get kudos if you post on Strava? Yeah, kudos. Keep your texts coming in, 9-6-96. When did you cheat as an adult?

Now, when you've cheated as an adult, some texts in? My friend needed to take a medical type test when she wanted to work at a hospital and she struggled. I was 16 and I did it for her over the phone. She passed. Wow. That's probably not gosh. No.

Yeah. I cheated on my NCAA level. three exams. I still failed. Well, you didn't seem very well. Jesus. My husband cheated on a work test slash interview. He had to add up a bunch of numbers for a spreadsheet. It was being tested on how fast he could complete the spreadsheet.

I was in bed with a headache and he was doing this test from home. So he would call out two or three numbers and I'd give him the sum of them as he can't do maths in his head. But I must have been pretty good because he got the job. Wow. Figure it out later if you need those skills. That's what auto adds for, right? the column ad.

It literally is ex-sales great. Auto-sum. Auto-sum, that's what it's called. This one's, Mercury does step challenges on their app to get free power. Sorry? Wait, is that how,

and I'm with Meridian? What do they do? I think I'm Janesis. Right, okay. I'm Janesis, I think. I'm Power Shop. Gosh. Oh, we've got a good...

Yeah. Haged our bets. No, I just literally go with most cheapest. It's all the same power. Isn't it? Isn't it? I suppose it is. It's all the same power, isn't it?

You don't get to choose. I want wind today. So I had one to do 6,000 steps and I was behind, and it was finishing at 8pm. I was waiting outside of my daughter's school to pick her up at 7 p.m., so I figured I'd sit and shake the phone to get the steps. Now, it wasn't until someone pulled up next to me,

and there I was feverishly shaking my phone back and forth in the dark, outside of school, and all they could see was someone like, yeah, that's not a good luck. There's a problem. So, someone said I used to cheat hard on farm town. It's all in the street. all bruce. Now I never played Farmtown.

I haven't played FarmVille on Facebook, but I'm imagining of the same. We all cheated on age of empires, didn't we? We did, yeah. I'm waiting 12 hours for this bloody thing to be built? Absolutely not. Catapult now. And let's get that laser car.

Let's get that laser car. I was in a team rowing machine challenge at the gym and pressed a reset button on the guy next to his machine every time he went for a drink. That is so cheek. That's naughty, because they'd come back and notice. Yeah.

Oh, someone said, on the back of your cake competition, we had a guess who's coming to dinner. No, that's not what it's called. They've called it that, but it's come dine with me. Come dine with me. It's not, guess who's coming to dinner. We had a come dine with me competition with all my flat mates. When we moved into different flats, we kept doing it. They came to mine.

I'd order to do, but it's put it in my own dishes. And I cooked some rice in the rice cooker so the kitchen smelt right. Amazing. One it with the butter chicken from scratch. Wow. Yeah. I did a sponsored 10K walk for charity I'd lift for the middle bit with my mum

Still raised $400 so I reckon the kids still win Even if I cheated to do it 40 hour famine and ate donuts and stuff It was raising money that was the main thing Don't knock on me mum Yeah Oh okay Had been seeing this girl for a little while

And her dad invited me to go play golf with them Oh This is a bit of a who's going to be alpha male situation Right you probably don't want to beat your potential father-in-law at golf But you don't want to be terrible But I cheated and I beat him How do you cheat a golf? Well, say if you hit a ball and it goes out of bounds or in the water or something, you walk up and you're like,

oh, here it is, and you drop another ball and you're like, whew, that was close almost in the water. Oh, my God. Nicely onto the grain. Golf's had some mentions of golf on the show today. I had two stations on there. Okay. I did a no-sugar for a month challenge at work. There was a leaderboard and everything.

I had a full morrow bar in the stationary cupboard. I can't do it. time. Gave in. Yeah. Brilliant. Oh, hide and seek with... Does this count? I played hide and seek with my nieces and nephews when I was trying to be cool, uncle. I had it in the car, I turned on the

aircon and watched Netflix on my phone for 45 minutes. You won. You won. I mean, that's hiding. Yeah, you were hiding. I think that's cheating, I think. That's fine. Oh no, because if the aircon was on the car would have to be on, but the car could still be locked. It sounds like dumb kids, to be honest.

I'd look in the car. I didn't look in the car. Yeah, it's literally so obvious. Under the bed or in the car. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley It's kind of nice When you have a couple of nights in a hotel

Yeah Yeah Because you can just be a bit slobby Apart from the shub You're not a fan of shubs are you Apart from the shub The shubs The shub's terrible

But it's such a Kiwi thing Because like You know The old houses had bath tubs And then where do you put the shower Over the bath Yeah But it's like

I would I think I'd rather Almost have one of those Bath curtains That sticks to you if you touch it, then a half the half hinged glass door. The half inch glass is no, the half glass

is no good, the water gets around it. Yeah, but nobody likes a shower curtains sticking to you. No, it does. Especially in a hotel because it's someone else's curtains touch your dick. I'm going to call, yes. Actually, you've unlocked my kink. Oh, you're that clinging.

That I've been kicked out of so many drape stores. I know. Oh, you have. I've got to call out Shannon here. She put this in the girls chat. Oh, wait, what? Yeah, yeah. She's absolutely Soil the sheets at the QT.

Really? What do you mean? Spray tan baby. Oh, no. Yeah, me too. On the white bath towels, there's just one little streak of fake tan. Gritty fake tan. And they're like, oh, do you want to save the earth and we won't change your tails?

No, I wipe my bum and it wasn't clean. Screw the earth, burn the towel. Get me a fresh one, please. Cookie Little Pong, what's your favourite part of staying at a hotel? We gave you the options, the beard, not having tuesday. to claim the amenities or other informers of said other. Like room service. 57% of people said it's their favourite people.

57% of people's said their favourite part was not having to clean. 21% said the bed. The bed is so subjective. Yeah. I've got a too soft a bed. Yeah, see, I like that. I wouldn't like it into my daily life, but I like going to a cloud bed in a hotel. Oh, it's no good.

Swallowed up by it. For the back of a man entering middle age. The amenities was 15%. and 7% of people said other things. Yeah, I love to steal the tissues, don't I? Remember that, Haley? The boxes are there, yeah, I've got one ready to go. Good.

Suck it QT. Tess a message, and I've never stayed in one. Oh, okay. Maybe only Airbnbs or motels? Just stay local. Or just not ACOM? Motel's its own thing. That would be a whole different silly little pole.

Yeah. Okay, not having to pay for hot water. I have forever hot showers and I'll always have a bath. Yes. But I'm in a hotel says Megan because I don't have to pay for the water. Same. I never have a bath. I mean, I don't have a bath at home, but even if I did,

something about having it at a hotel. I love hotel baths. Unless it's a shab, then no, I won't. Because the shower's dripping on me now. And the bath's too small. Yeah. It's sort of the worst of both worlds. It's not a full-size person's bath.

No. Being tucked in super tight, said Emma. Like, you know, the straight jacket tight sheets when they make the bed so incredibly tight. Liz said being a freak in the sheets that you don't have to claim. Oh, Liz. A whole sort of sheet or two in a hotel. room. Fletch, comment?

He just leaves cash out. He leaves cash out in an apology night. Don't ask me what. That is an absolute lies. There was a whirlwind. I just love the escape from reality, said Nina. Like being in a small room and you're like, hmm, this is in my house. Yes, and it's all in the same room. Yeah. There's a jug in there. There's a jug in the bedroom.

And a chair? Yeah. Lee said, I voted for the bedroom. but really it's just all of the above. Isn't it a bit of a different experience? It's just as a... It's so fun. Carl said adult times, any time of the day, no guilt about mess.

Yeah, that's actually not our Carl that message then, and either. No, different Carl. No, but there's something about the room and you close that door and you're like, I think it will play with myself. Chris. Yeah.

Door goes click, pants go, sure. Get that Wi-Fi on. TV goes on and you just scroll through. Just a check. Yep. Yeah, just a check. Nah, nah, no music video channels anymore.

Laptop on the guts. Kristen said, the large mirrors by the beds. Haley, do you wish to comment? No. No, okay. I'll just say the hotel room we're in is made of like four rules of mirrors. It's a very king of motel. It's very confronting.

The convenience to being in places. We live on the outskirts of Auckland, And so parking and getting in for concerts sucks. We catch the train in and stay in a hotel and life is easy. Yeah, nice. That's lovely. It's good stuff. Having a full English breakfast cooked for me and not having a wash up afterwards.

Yeah, lovely. I love doing nothing for myself. A spa bath is one of my requirements when booking accommodations said Jessica. I like the carpeted spa baths in the corner of an old motel. You can do next to the bed and you're like, let's roll from there to this. It's really wet. Yeah, it's very wet. It's a wet.

Well, we love the hotel life. We do. But people's favourite part, 57% of yesterday. saying not having a claim. Emily as well got through the double pass to see Fletchhorn and Haley Live. Oh, that's us tonight in Wellington at the Opera House. Haley, sorry, Haley. Emily, message us.

Emily message that Haley has picked up the tickets. Haley, congratulations. Thank you. Do you feel a bit crazy that your name's in the name of the show? Well, you know, one of the best. Are you going to get up if I sort of want to take a break so that Fletch Fawn and Haley Live continues, you might have to pop up for a bit. Potentially, but I've finished a night shift at the moment,

so I can't promise too much. Have a nap. Have a nap. Have a nap. I might need to call on you. Okay, have a nap. Congratulations, a double pass for you, and still some tickets left for the show tonight.

The Z&P Podcast Network, play ZN's flesh, one and Haley. God, I'm getting old. You know, for me, it's always when a celebrity has, like, you see their, like, paparazzi shots and they've got, like, fully grown teenage kids. Yeah. When the hell did that happen?

Yeah, like Apple. Like Apple Martin's walking in... She's a model, eh? Yeah, she's been walking in some of the Paris fashion shows. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just like, like what? 22. Or maybe it's the moment where you are out for a fun night with your workmates,

celebrating your birthday, and the two girls get stopped at the door and ID'd, and I just stand there like an old haggard bitch. And then sort of hit my throat at the bouncer, who himself is apparently 19 and he looks at me confused as to why would I be clearing my throat clearly he does not need to check my ID

maybe that's what made you feel old recently Maybe and did that, when did that happen? Because that seems quite specific. 12 hours ago. Yeah. So this is what's making us feel old as well. Kimberly Wyatt, who's a member of the Pussycat dolls. Listen up your buttons, babe.

She's one of the three original PCD. is we called them. Yeah, back in the day, we called them PCDs. PCDs. That is back touring with Nicole Scherzinger and Ashley Roberts. Yes. The other girls didn't want to. And that's why we know them as the other girls. Yeah.

So Kimberly is 44 years old. Obviously, she's a singer and a dancer. And she has had a hip replacement. Like, when you say, it's just so funny, one of the pussy get dolls has had a hit replacement. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's usually like NAN's getting a hip replacement or mom's getting a hit replacement or something like that.

Mom hasn't been able to do the gardening as well, so she's getting a hip replacement. Yeah, yeah, exactly. My mom's looking to getting your knees done, you know. Yeah, like, that's appropriate, but she's a 44-year-old, and everyone's like, wait, you're a pussycat doll. I thought we were loosening up our buttons, babe. Yeah, but it was apparently because of all the dancing, right? It was a lifelong dancing.

Yeah, a lifelong dancer, a nightly, intense dance returns as part of the pussy-gat-dolls and three caesarean sections. Oh, right, so she's just a bit. Wow. Yeah. She said she could barely walk a few years ago. She was, like, limping, and it was terrible. So now she's had a very, successful hip replacement.

Should we back on tour, new hip, new Kimberley? Well, we want to know this morning, 0,800 dance at him, you can text as well, 9-6-96, what has made you feel old recently? Maybe something's happened to you, you didn't get ID'd at the bar like Haley last night. Then he sort of fake-assed me

and I was like, get lost. Somebody messaged in saying the combination of mum and dance is diabolical. Because your hips move to accommodate children, right? And then you have major trauma surgery to cut them out if you get a C-section. And the hips don't lie.

And the hips, they don't lie. They can't lie. No. And a moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips. Yes. The hips, the hips. It's all connected. Yeah.

Look at them, my hips are small and humble. No, that's my... No. That's my boobs. Your breasts are small and humble. Yeah. So you don't confuse them with mountains. Right, that's right.

Look at them my legs are strong like my mother's. Yes. Gav message, and I visited my new doctor this morning. I estimate she was 11 years old and approximately one meter tall. Would that be like people that go to visit Dr. Shawnee, our friend Dr. Shawnee. Because he's a young doctor because normally doctors are old. I've got a young doctor too. I remember I'm always like, yeah.

We can talk to each other like young women. Every time I said they announce a new All Blacks team, I feel old. They used to be big and mature because I was young, but now they're just big and young. I'm a bit like that when I tried to purve on rugby teams. I mean, we went looking at the Warriors and I was like, oh my God. But that was the reserve team. They were always younger, yeah. Yeah, they were like 18, 19.

I was like, nothing for Mama. Sorry. Oh, Mama, I hated it. I hated it too. Jesus. Imagine if a man said that about a woman. Yeah, disgusting, actually.

Sorry. I felt old when I got a funny tan mark from my hormone replacement therapy patch. Oh, yeah, yeah, a little tan patch. Having to pay $5,000 for an Ashley and Martin treatment at the age of 29 for a receding hairline. Oh. Yeah, get in there early.

I know they advertise a lot with the company, but just buy the bullet and shave that head, come. Yeah, with another bald head. I feel old when I eat something really yummy. I go, oh, that's a bit rich, isn't it? Heartburn? Yeah. That's not good for me.

No subtitles, no watch. I'm 37 and I've got to have them on. I don't hear it. Full shoulder replacement and arthritis in my back at the right bold age of 23. Geez. Wow. When someone who looks 40 calls you Matua, I was just like, hey. Or even when they, like when I was.

worked in retail and they'd be like, ask the lady where that. I'm like, what lady? You are the lady. Are we referring to? I'm the girl. It was like last night that man asked the lady for no ID. Yeah, yeah. He waved through the lady.

He waved through the lady. Ask the girls for their ID and the lady got in. My friends are having babies on purpose and I'm not saying, oh shit, what are you going to do? Yes. Oh, nice. It makes me wonder. Should I be having kids? Ha ha ha.

No way. I'm still a kid. No. Oh, do you want me to drive here? Have holidays, not kids. Do you need a book an appointment these days? A teenager in the Pagansaid called me, sir. Oh, I've just turned 30.

I've got a favourite chair. People know not to sit in it. Oh, that's an old person thing. That's an old person thing. I had to Google some GNA alpha slang the other day. I did it in incognito mode because I was so embarrassed. They had to Google slang. You're having a bit of an issue warm with your ears, aren't you?

You've got the hair in your ears. I just got hair everywhere. Yeah, it's everywhere. Just growing out everywhere. And I've had to do the thing now because this hit you pretty hard. when you needed glasses like immediately. Yeah. If I'm wearing my glasses to see far away

and I need to change to clothes, I'm like... Oh my God! Yes! What did you... Shannon had printed something out for our show tonight and she was like, is this writing going to be okay? And Flet, you held it out and how did it... Full arm extended nose down like that. I know that's perfect.

I know that's perfect. I know. Look at you. It was so good until like last year and it went downhill so fast. Oh my God, gone. But it happens to all of us. Not me. Some Gen Z. at work asked me where I saw something that I was referring to.

I said Facebook and they all cracked up laughing. Someone asked me when we were going out, what's going to be the vibe of your outfit? And I said warm and comfortable. When you see girls on court in place, you're like, God, she needs a jacket. Yeah. Oh, she must be cold.

And that was you when you were like. Well, I had my booze blanket on. Yeah. I've had my full license longer than the youngest All Black's been alive. Wow. Okay, that's confronting. Wow. I'd to sit down to put my shoes on.

God, that's me, eh. The Zemm Podcast Network. I, if you don't know, I've got a boyfriend. I've got a boyfriend. And, you know, it's like, it's kind of fresh. And there's still things to learn about each other. Yeah, I mean, it has been a year. Has been a year, yeah.

But still learning things. I thought you were going to be a gigantic Lesbuck. I wanted to. That was those were her words actually Fletcher. Yeah. Nice and racist. For that. Oh, raging, gigantic lesbian.

Raging. Right. Lesbian. I know I failed. I met a boy. And we don't live together, but he spends a fair amount of time at my house. I mean, you may as well. He's been apart like three nights in the last year.

And they were awful. And I got home to pack my bag, to come down to Wellington. And he had been there. And he had done some washing to try to be helpful. Appreciate the gesture. This doesn't sound. The tone of voice indicates to me. Appreciate the gesture.

Now, as you sort of... Do you need to bring out your triangle from therapy? Yeah, my therapy triangle. Okay, in this situation, I've been learning in therapy about our sometimes, it's called the... Carpman. No, no, Camden. Camas.

Side one. Screw guys. Yeah, you're paying all this money and your therapist is like, I've got the Cammin Triangle. No, it's called the Carpman Drama Triangle. It's about, in moments of drama, toxic roles that you can play. We talked a little bit about the other day

how I played the victim and then moved to persecutor. I'm learning. See, I'm trying to be a good partner here. We'll be out somewhere and Haley will just get out the little yellow piece of paper, the post-it note, with the triangle. Don't be the victim. You're being a victim.

Well, I was the victim of a crime. So he does something to try to help me. Bless you. But the man loves a dryer. Ooh, red flag. And I was Fabrics, suicide. It is fabric suicide.

That's what a lovely homosexual retail man told me once and I always remember his words have stuck with me. I'll tell you what. The man is right, especially if that fabric is mohair. Now anyone who...

Wait, doesn't that need a hand wash? Yes. Yeah, okay. Not only has my mohair jumper, favorite one, by the way, would have brought it to Wellington, the red one. Oh, that's a great...

The girls are gasp in the colour. Yeah. He's like, I don't. I did a bunch of washing for you, you know, so you can take some clean stuff to Wellington and Hamilton. I was like, oh, I'll go through. And I just see this tight, like a quarter of the size version of the jumper. Yep. And I went, oh my God, no, he didn't.

I pull it out. Not only has it gone through the dryer, I predict it had a hot wash on it beforehand. This thing would fit a toddler. Oh, really? Tiny. It is tight. It is destroyed. destroyed.

Like this thing was completely unwearable. And I, in order to not be the persecutor on your victim triangle. On my victim catman triangle. I had to gently approach and say, thank you so much for doing the washing.

In future. Oh my God, you're gentle partnering. This is like gentle parenting. Like Tommy's broken a window. Now Tommy, what have I said about kicking the ball inside? In future. what would be best is if you left fabrics you were unsure of

out of the dryer when trying to be helpful. Appreciate the gesture of the clean clothes. But you have destroyed a Mohair jumper. And I now feel owed one. So what are the other two corners? Of the triangle. That felt like you were definitely on another corner of that triangle. So, passive aggressive.

Yeah, passive aggressive persecutor. That's not on the triangle. You're turning it into a square. Okay, the Cartman drama triangle, which is a series of toxic behaviors and moments of drama. There's the persecutor, so you've done this, you've done this, you've done this, you've done this. The victim, which is, woe is me, I'm so this, I'm so this, I'm very good at that one. And the rescuer, which is like, don't worry about that. And come in and try to sweep in and ignore your own things.

So in this moment, I think I did quite well. To not be on the triangle. Not be on the triangle. Yeah, good. You're really, you're coming far. You're coming along. But he needs to replace it and then never. ever do that again, or I will become the persecutor.

I counted 79 all rights today. Fletcher, I believe that's a new personal record. Oh, fuck off. How many of those did you count? 79 of those, too. All right. Well, if you enjoyed today's podcast, give us a rate and review. Oh, fuck off. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.