ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - June 4th 2025

Episode Date: June 3, 2025

How to know a guy is into you SLP - Gum or mints? Most disappointing beach Top 6 signs your salmon is stressed Woman want a pretty boy Tiktok sleep meditation feature Jodi McAlister IV Tinder's new height search feature Were you the naughty kid? Morgan Penn  Sex.life launch day Hayley and Shannon had a friendship milestone Fact of the Day How bad was the flat argument?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM Podcast Network, this is Fleshhorn and Hayley's big pod. Thanks to animates, making happy happen for pets. Play ZM's Fleshhorn and Hayley's. Thanks Bryn, good morning. Fleshhorn and Hayley, welcome to the show. International ATM at 8 o'clock this morning, your chance to win some cash. Maybe nice. Love this game. We'll give you three currencies, international foreign currencies, often ones I've never heard of. Yeah a lot of these I've I had no idea. That's the fun of it.

We're learning aren't we? Aren't we? Well eight o'clock you're chance to call through and when you share that twenty thousand dollars cash that we're giving away. You've got the top six spawned. Yeah, there's stressed fish. Oh. Oh. I think this is more about there being stress on the fish supply, but I like to imagine very neurotic, stressed out salmon. Burned out, yeah.

So I'm at the top six signs your salmon is stressed coming up in the top six. Next on the show though. Apparently the girlies wanna share with us some, say dating advice? How to know if a guy is into you? And I've got a look in their eye that makes me feel like this is gonna be a little bit silly.

Play ZM's Flashborn and Haley. Let's kick off the show by heading immediately to the producers booth where Shannon and Carwin want to share with us dating advice. From the youths! Yeah, and so like, I mean, both of us haven't been single for a while. Oh wait, I go brag? Wow! You rub it in everyone's faces. Yeah, yeah, sorry.

Hot property out there, sorry! Yeah, I'm a dink, take that. Yeah, dinks. Oh, we don't call them that anymore. Yeah. I think that's an entire term. Haven't for years. But what I'm hearing from my friends that are single is that it's like, it's a lot, like it's boring, we're over it.

It's pretty depressing. So I saw something on TikTok and I want to share it with you because I think it's pretty silly and I think that it's a fun and silly-billy way to know if a guy is into you. Okay. Okay. I will say this only works for a guy, but it might work in a homosexual relationship, guy-guy as well. Okay. So, if you really want to know if this guy is into you, when you're hanging out, you

just say, hey, could you like, helicopter for me? Well, I know what, I've got an image in my mind of what they're doing. Just flinging the flinging the doodle around isn't it? And then if they go yeah of course and like do it and you're having silly Billy times into you if they go oh no I wouldn't do that. That's a ridiculous sign that someone's into you. It's a vulnerability. They're into you, they're already naked, stark naked in front of you. How comfortable. It's a vulnerability. Yeah, and they're comfortable with you. They're already naked, stark naked in front of you. They're at your house, they're into you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is not what that means. You've not been around men that are like in the world at the moment. They can play you. Men can play you so hard, but they can't play a helicopter. I haven't seen a real life helicopter for a number of years. Well, some men can't play a helicopter. I haven't seen a helicopter for a number of years. Some men can't helicopter. Yeah.

Why? It's more sort of a... Oh, okay. A jiggly nap. A jiggly nap. It could be a jiggly nap. More of a Cessna propeller sort of situation. It's a big helicopter.

And now you've genital shamed them. Yeah, and nothing wrong with a Cessna? No, absolutely not. No, no, no, no. The workhorse of the aviation world. Absolutely, how do you use it? Well, you can phrase it differently. I was just trying to make it radio safe.

You can just say, give me a little jiggle or whatever. Okay, show on the other foot. If a guy was just like, hey love, could you just jiggle them about for me? Yeah, absolutely. That would be my pleasure. Yeah, if I'm into you. Absolutely.

Okay. I already have been this whole time. Yeah, right. So this be my pleasure. Yeah. If I'm into you. Absolutely. Okay. I already have been this whole time. Yeah, right. So this works is what you're saying. Yeah, yeah. I don't know, I'm confused. I sort of get the silliness of it.

If someone asked you to helicopter. I'd just do it. You'd probably do it. You'd probably do it. I have any opportunity to get it out. What? Yeah. What?

I think it's just a good like showing that they are they are happy to be invulnerable in front of you, happy to just have a silly laugh, a giggle, nothing's too serious. Yeah right. But wait, not in the workplace eh? No no no no no. Oh because I was about to ask. Yeah right, okay so this is just exclusively dating probably in the bedroom. Yeah.

Okay. Well thanks for the advice galsals. And good luck out there, everyone. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley, silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly, that silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole, which do you prefer chewing gum or mint? Mint. Breath mints.

Breath mints. Peppermints. That way it doesn't sound like mints. Are we bringing back our game mints or mints? Mints or mints. Which or which? Which, which, which mints, which mints? Which, which is which.

OK, I'm going to have some mints balls. That would be mints as in the beef. Nah, that felt like he's going to have peppermint balls. Yeah. Yeah, I was. I think you would just say mint balls then. You wouldn't say mints in that situation. Mints balls. Nobody was playing us. Right. Clever.

Well, mints is the winner at 57% of people. Breath mints. Yeah. I haven't done chewing gum 43%. I haven't done chewing gum for 43%. You haven't done chewing gum for years. Oh, you know, I always have a tin of Eclipse. Yeah, I think that's the only time I ever have them is if someone else has them, like I don't buy them. No, I do.

Because the sound of chewing gum's just getting more and more irritating to me. Oh, and you see it everywhere on the streets too. That's the worst. Because is it Singapore that's completely banned it for like the last 20 years? Yeah yeah yeah. Not allowed it. Uh well some feedback on the matter, just after this yawn, is that Jane said as a school teacher the sound or sight of someone chewing gum instantly annoys and frustrates me. It's gross eh. Yeah I'm put off by it. Oh my god. I just googled in Singapore. It said fine of $10,000 Yeah, first time if you're caught like buying it overseas and bringing it in to the country. All right

So that's yeah having it so littering chewing gum in Singapore $2,000 Wow, that's not say Harlow which is an ammo very much love that right name Harlow says into Jack Harlow, which is a name I very much like. I love that. Great name, Harlow says. What happened to Jack Harlow? Who is Jack Harlow? Where's Jack Harlow gone? Oh, that rough looking fellow.

Yeah, the curly hair. That rough looking fellow. Yes, Jack Harlow. What's he doing now? What is he doing with his life? Do something. Don't just sit around. Don't just sit around earning money off that one song.

He had a crush on Dua Lipa, that's what I'm learning here. Jack Harlow news. She's taken born. She's occupied. Yeah. She's occupied. Eight hours ago Jack Harlow teased unreleased new balance 4-4-2. Oh shoes.

Make some music. Make some music. Christ almighty. The work ethic. The work ethic is sloppy. From someone who works four hours a day, the work ethic. He was recently dismissed from a lawsuit related to a fatal 2021 Derby Eve shooting of a woman by his DJ. What? A sentence. What? Imagine having to ring your mum. Mum, great news. Back home in Louisville, I've recently been dismissed from a lawsuit relating to that fatal 2021 Derby Eve shooting of a woman

by my DJ. A DJ. What has your DJ been doing? I don't know. Okay, Jack Harlow. Anyway, we've got a side track there by some Jack, a Jack Harlow sidebar. It would be good though to get a gaugeacked there by some Jack Harlow sidebar.

It would be good though to get a gauge on what he's doing. Light sidebar. Um, five days ago he said designed an indoor soccer shoe. And he's wearing the New Valances as previously mentioned. He's really into the shoes, isn't he? Really into the New Valances. Alright, well Harlow said third option, mince beef. Pretty silly. Yeah. Well if I had there was a line up. said third option mince beef pretty silly yeah I'm glad Harlow's name didn't digress us so much and then just deal with beef mince and then be totally

worth it in the end. Mince because I'm a commitment phobe said Alison so what a mint when you're done with that crunch crunch crunch swallow whereas gum you've got to hold on to you till you find it in. And the flavour's gone within like 30 seconds and then you just left chewing this thing that's tasteless. Yeah, yeah. Speaking of tasteless. Tough. Speaking of tasteless, the next respondee is Sprowlien

who runs a Hayley Sprowl fan account. Tasteless, you're not wrong. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Don't cry, you fake tan will run. Yeah. Do you want to look like a streaky mess? Kind of streaky cheeks. I used to like both but now I don't eat either. Mint equals acid reflux and apparently plastic has been a key ingredient in most chewing

gums since World War II. Often disguised as gum base. Oh wow. She's really got intel. Spralions got some conspiracy rolling there. Gum is for grubby little teenage pricks. From Adam. Wow, Adam not holding back there. Gr little teenage pricks. Oh! From Adam. Wow, Adam not holding back there.

Adam agreed. Grubby teenage pricks. Felicity, depends if I need to concentrate gym. Gym, I think she means gum. Okay. If I need to concentrate gum, but if I need to deal with breath, it's mints. Okay.

Ah, pre-tea. Show regular. Always. Chewing gum makes me hungry. I completely agree. Is it cause it's a live production? Yeah, maybe. And it tells your stomach that you're about to get food.

Yeah, I'm chewing. There's food coming your way. But nothing's coming. Nothing's coming. Well, we've answered your question pretty, so you don't need to ask yourself why. Matt says gum lasts longer. Not only the flavour, but the microplastics are forever.

Yeah, nice. Remember there's a plastic teaspoon of plastic in our brains. And you might be thinking of the equivalent. No, your brain forms the plastics into a teaspoon. It does, yep. Or a fork, depending on. And one day it will come out your nose hole. Yep.

Mine's a tablespoon and I'm not even afraid to say it. Leave it in there then. Mints are far less admins, says Fiona, and Kate said chewy mints. Or are they the ones that start as a mint and then they go chewy? Oh yeah. Those are lollies.

Not the super hard one though. I'm straightening that. They've got a real fence setter there. Kate's a real fence setter, isn't she? That is today's Silly Little Poll. Waikiki Beach in Hawaii. The world's most disappointing beach, according to Cloud Woods. Disappointing because you think, oh my God, Hawaii.

And then you get there and you're like oh packed dirty or both what kind of like the I mean it is packed they yeah but it's not like you can walk straight out of your hotel through the front but down under the beach and to some crystal clear with nice warm blue water and then almost get wiped out by that catamaran that takes tourists around. That thing when it's coming in is honking because they've got to ground it every time. So they analyzed CloudWords, which is a cloud storage review site.

Okay. Weirdly. Looked at 200 of the world's top beaches and analyzed the number of complaint related keywords like dirty, overcrowded, long queues, and noise on Trip Advisor reviews. So you still had to be a top beach of the world. I was like man, there's some pretty crap beaches around everywhere.

Yeah, so long queues, noise and cleanliness received the most criticism of Waikiki. The 10 most complained about beaches, which to be honest any of these would do. Any would do. Maho and St Martin, that's where they fly the plane over, isn't it? I'd love to go just to see. I'd love to go there, yeah. Bondi in Australia, which I get,

cause that gets very crowded. So busy. That's a nice beach. But super hot and then swimming and then it's crowded in the water. Magans Bay Beach in the US Virgin Islands and at eight. Alafonisi Beach in Greece. La Jolla Cove in the US.

Bournemouth in the UK. Clearwater Beach in the US. Ooh, beach in the UK. I'm sorry, but no Bournemouth. There should be no UK. I think there would be rocket. I think there would be rocket. And there'd be all pebbles and stuff.

Pebbles, gray skies, wind and seagulls. That's what I'm imagining. And heaps of boat sheds. Yeah, yeah, lots of. And a donkey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And a stag do. Yeah, like gray skies, wind and sea gulls. That's what I'm imagining. And heaps of boat sheds. Yeah, yeah, like lots of. And a donkey. Yeah, yeah. And a stag do. Yeah, yes.

Or a hen's do. And they're all like, hello. I've got a big orange turn on. Actually, it's sand. I'm looking at a photo here. Oh, don't. No, it's not, it's pebbles. If you zoom in, it's pebbles.

It's sand, but there's tons of beach, little boat sheds down there. Yeah. And actually, for the UK, for the UK, doesn't look too bad. For the UK, though. Oh yeah, I know. Yeah, come actually for the UK for the UK doesn't look too bad for the UK though Oh, yeah. Yeah. What are the other most complained about clear water beach in the US player? Antonio and Costa Rica What there's nothing wrong with that beach? Well, I don't know it's like incredible. I don't know what they're

Costa Ricans on the beach may be touristy but like it's all good. That's lovely. It's an international park. Like there's monkeys everywhere and stuff. It's amazing. Maybe that's why Shannon went and she complained about the monkeys proximity. See, she doesn't like monkeys. Venice Beach in the US, which is a lot.

But the water's gross. And freezing cold. Yeah. Yeah. It's not that great a beach. I'd call it lame-o. But still, any of these beaches... It's great for people watching though, Venice Beach down to Santa Monica. Yeah any of these beaches would be amazing to be at.

Oh god yeah. And Waikiki Beach US is number one the most complained about beach. What has the most negative words in reviews. People whinge, like you see reviews like people whinge about the most stupid stuff. There was a plastic bottle like I don't, did it fall out of your bag probably? Clean, oh also feel free to just pick it up. The worst thing about the beaches in Europe or anywhere is when they charge you for the seats. Yeah, well that's everywhere though. That's everywhere, yeah. And man it's not cheap. You've got to get there early and just make the most of it all day.

I found an extended version out to 50. No New Zealand beaches on there. Well that's of course, because we're great. We are just beach, we're very skinny. Play ZM's Fleshborne and Haley. Play ZM's Fleshborne and Haley. From your local community Facebook page, this is the top six. Well, salmon.

I like it, I haven't had salmon for ages. It's delicious, but it's stressed. Yeah. It's stressed. Yes. The New Zealand King salmon has reduced their harvest due to small stressed fish. The harvest this year has been hard since COVID. Get a hands honestly. It feels like it hasn't stopped. Yeah we haven't bounced back. They're going to reduce, for four months they're going to reduce harvesting volumes to up to 17% meaning that they would be harvesting between 5200 and 5400 metric tons of fish. It's a lot of fish. I mean I'd be stressed too if I knew that I was going to end up in a supermarket. One of those plastic sealed. They really seal those salmon in there

They do. They do. They're impossible to get out. Yeah, but it's good though that we know it's fresh. Yeah So they're pulling right back They're easily stressed and when they get stressed they have a suppressed appetite. Wish I had that problem So yeah, they're just not eating as much as any. They might be on Ozempic. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's giving Ozempic. Because we like a big fat salmon, don't we?

Yeah. Yeah, I'm just busy. I've started running. Just happier. Really? Because I haven't seen you run or go to the gym. Yeah. And you've lost like 50 kg.

Yeah, that's crazy. Slipping off me. How fast? Yeah, slipping off me. Well, I've got today the top six ways to tell you salmon is stressed. Okay. It's a stressed salmon. Number six on the list is when you ask them

how they're doing, they say to be honest, they're floundering. Great. Oh. Here we go. I'm floundering at the moment. Here we go. Floundering.

Is this gonna be all puns? Pretty much. Number five on the list are the top six ways to tell your salmon is stressed. They feel a little overwhelmed by the incelminity of the world. Nice. Yeah, less for me.

Bit of a squeeze. That was a terrible one. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six signs your salmon is stressed. They keep trying to swim upstream even though their therapist told them to go with the flow. Yeah, I like that.

Okay. I like that. Number three on the list of the top six signs your salmon's stressed. They spontaneously burst into tears. Spawn-taneously. Cause they spawn upstream. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

And it sounds like spontaneous. Yeah, yeah, no, don't break it down. Nice. Number two on the list, it's not a pun, it's dark. They are looking for the shadow of a grizzly bear for the sweet release of death. Dark, but I like it. I like it, I like it.

I'll remember a long time. Speak quick, it'll be fast. What eats them here? Us and presumably a bigger fish. A bird? It has to be a big bird. The heartsteagull. The smallest, oh yeah.

The heartsteagull would have swept down. Fat king salmon. Back in the day. I don't think they would have any predators here. No, I don't know. Other than just South Island farmers. South Islanders. And number one on the list, this is Shannon's one.

Shannon came up with this. Oh God. Credit where it's due. Six ways to tell your salmon is stressed. It's not smoked salmon, it's a salmon smoking. Yeah, really good. That's really good. That's really good.

Really good, really good. Yeah. She pitched that at the show meeting this morning and we all just went, yeah, we just went, done that. Here she is. And then really the other five are paled in comparison. Yeah, they did. Oh, you're dreadful.

Paled in comparison. That is today's top six. This is something, this is a study that really challenges the idea that someone like Jason M Momoa, for example, would be the hottest guy ever. He's a very masculine man, graph, beard, long hair, chiseled, kukudududu. Well apparently according to this study,

out of, I will say, Japan and the UK, that's where they did the study, women are preferring now more feminine male faces. So your likes of your Timothy Shalalalalalamaze, your Tom Hollands, your sort of softer pretty boys. Okay. I wouldn't say that Tom Holland is a feminine face. 100%, what's masculine about his face?

He's like a little angel face. Is it because he doesn't have a beard? No, but it's just like very like dainty features. Boyish? Boyish more than man. Alfish? Yeah, very alfish. Peter Pan.

Yeah. So women, heterosexual women, were preferring more feminine or softer featured faces over those that are like your gruff chiseled men which is my type. You're going to have to shave your beard off for now. Yeah particularly in younger British heterosexual women showed a higher preference for feminine male faces. No interest in young heterosexual British women. Yeah. Changed a lot of them. Japanese participants both genders had a stronger preference for female male faces. Feminine, sorry, male faces, compared to British participants.

Bisexual participants, it's nice that they finally get a say. Showed unique patterns. Oh yeah, boo hoo, poor bisexuals. Ha ha ha ha. Have it all. Everyone's a possibility for the bisexuals. Live it up.

Not just, British bisexual women preferred feminine men Have it all everyone's a possibility for the bisexuals live it up not just British bisexual women preferred feminine men and masculine women Okay Japanese bisexual women preferred less femininity in both gender so wanting more of a masculine energy Okay, the Japanese bisexual interest. What do you think if they interviewed Kiwis? I think we go a bit more is bisexual. Intriguing. What do you think if they interviewed Kiwis? Do you think it would be the same? I think we go a bit more looking for your hard-yakka, hard-working man.

Yeah. But I don't know. But you can't speak on behalf of young women. No I can't. As an old hag. Don't bully me today. Not today? Not today.

She's had a fake tan, you don't want it to run. I've had a fake tan and new hair extensions and I just have absolutely no recognition for it. Wait, will the fake tan run now or is it set? Nah, it's set. Oh okay, so we... So you can make me cry, just want to check or you want to make me cry? Continue bullying.

Wow, well I think that you guys are really lovely and attractive people. Oh, and start with what you said on pink shirt day. At least I'm bullying outside of the no bullying day. Yeah, you look silly. You look ridiculous. Yuck. Well, TikTok have announced some new controls, some new features. You're going to be able to manage topics, meaning that you can dial up or dial down popular topics.

Oh yeah. But it's weird because I mean, TikTok knows you pretty well. Like it doesn't take long for the algorithm. To figure you out and what you're into. Yeah. See, there's not a lot that you see that you don't want to see really. You can't. I reckon I'm seeing a little bit too much 9-11 comedy.

But that's cause you have a dark... No. That's weird, eh. I think there's something, cause my sister-in-law, when I was in Australia, Nina, she was saying as well, like, God, I get fed so much, I'm 9-11 comedy. I was like, ugh. Yeah, me too.

They now have smart keyword filtering, which means you'll be able to import words that you don't want to see. So you could put in 9-11. I like putting in 9-11. And then it won't show you anything 9-11. It's so dark. But another feature that everybody is gonna be talking about the sleep hours meditation. So this means

That during sleep hours people will have their scrolling interrupted by a meditation exercise If you're 18 years or over you can choose to turn this feature on in your settings But if you're under 18, the feature is turned on by default from 10 p.m. Get off your phone, basically. Yeah, so it will give you a full screen prompt, and you'll do some meditation exercises. Not bad.

Or just put your phone down. I know it's hard sometimes when you're deep in the scroll. Put the bright screen down at 11 a.m.? Home. Is that what we're a.m.? Home. Home. Home. Home. Is that what we're doing? I don't know, I've never meditated.

Oh, it's painful. I don't have the attention span. I get bored. Same with when I went to yoga. I was like, oh, I'm over this. Same, move it all. Five minutes in, I was like, this is so boring. Yeah, me too.

But it's a good idea to sort of try to interrupt the flow of the scroll. Yeah. Because you know, sometimes. How long do you, oh, sorry. Oh, just sort of try to interrupt the flow of the scroll. Yeah. Because you know sometimes... How long do you... Oh sorry. Oh I just sometimes... I just interrupted the flow of your scroll. That's alright. I'm happy to... Hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo you though the meditation. Oh yeah definitely. Very good for you. Yeah but that's why like swimming that's kind of meditation for me. It's like it's time where you just have to think you don't have music you just swim. You don't you've ever invested in the waterproof headphones? No I see people swimming with them and I'm like that is just the one time of the day where I can be without headphones. Yeah yeah it's kind of nice. If I have no noise, I think too much about all the things that I've said and done

and the things I would have done differently and something I said to my mum when I was 14 and that sort of starts to chew away at me a bit and then I start to worry about the fact that she's going to die and I wonder if she thinks about it as often as I do. Such a nice lorazepam last night. That's dark. Just to shush that all. Just to shush that all down. Play ZM's Fletchborne and Hayley. Guys, you know I love my romance, my smart box. So we're very, very lucky to be joined by an Australian author called Jodie McAllister.

She's on the Zooms. Hello Jodie. Hi. Now Jodie, you're not just a romance and smart girlie as we know and love, but you have a PhD. My PhD, which I graduated from 10 years ago now, so I've been doing this for a minute, was on representations of female virginity loss in popular culture and the way that intersects

with narratives of love. So if you're a millennial, think Dawson's Creek. Yeah, Perfect reference. I don't want to wait for my life to be over. So good. So about half that PhD was about romance fiction and that was kind of my way into the subject matter. There will be a lot of people that would pick up a smart book or a romance book and think, as I have thought before, I reckon I could write this. But you can tell the difference between an author

that actually knows what they're talking about and an author that's just kind of ticking trophy boxes, right? Yeah, and I mean, this is something that people have been saying about romance for a long time. There's this idea that it's like super trashy, and because it's often quite easy reading, people think it's easy writing. But it is incredibly difficult to write a book that people can

become immersed and absorbed in. Do you prefer romance or smart? If I describe your books, what do you prefer? I'd say I'm probably closer to the romance end of the spectrum. If we're using the chilli spice rating, I'd probably come in somewhere at about a two, whereas a lot of the things that are self-described smart were up towards the four five. The four five. The physical spectrum. I've got a question as someone just standing

on the sidelines watching the ladies play smart and not really understanding the rules. Is it, the word smart was always such a, oh, smutty, no, no, no word, but am I correct in saying it's been fully embraced by both the readers and the authors now? So it's certainly been reclaimed to an extent. I think fully would probably be a bit much.

There are some people in like romance landia is the online term that people like to use about romance fiction. There are some people who would be like don't use the word smart, it's denigrating. It is denigrating the things we do. But particularly coming out of the sort of Book Talk community, smut has really, really been embraced. So it's like the word trash. Some people will gleefully re-embrace the word trash. Like one of the biggest romance novel review websites in the world is called

Smart Bitches Trashy Books. Oh, I love that. The girls are applauding. We're all loving it. Yeah, so it functions in the same way. Some people are like, yeah, trash, but we can say it. Yeah. And a lot of people are like, smart, but we can say it.

Can you tell us, as an academic and a romance writer, tell us about your new book. It's called An Academic Affair. So obviously you're working in territory you know well. The two main characters, Sadie and Jonah, have been academic rivals for 15 years. Ever since they first got into a fight in a first year literary tutorial about the poem To Joanna by Wordsworth. So they are rivals all through undergrad, they're rivals all through honours,

they go on to do PhD, different topics. Then they graduate and they're still competing for all the same teaching, funding, etc. Except now they don't have PhD scholarships, so they're really broke, which is why they live in the same share house, even though they hate each other. Falsed proximity, we love that. When they're 32, they're like, look, we, this has been going on for 15 years, we're adults, can we call a truce now? And they're like, okay, truce, white flags. But the very next day, a permanent job is listed

that they're both perfect for. So one of them gets this job, I won't tell you which one, but they realize the contract has a provision for partner hire, they can both have the job if they get married. Honestly, I'm so sucked into this already, Joey. Oh! So we have academic, rivals to lovers, marriage of convenience.

Oh wow, okay. The book by Jodie McAllister is called An Academic Affair. You can get it wherever you get your books. And honestly, I cannot wait to get my nose into this one, Jodie. And we just, honestly, the Gurleys are so excited to talk to you because we're huge fans on the show. So thank you so much for chatting to us. Oh, my pleasure, anytime. Play ZM's FletchBorn and Hayley.

I'm going to take up my job. It's Taylor Swift on ZM. FletchBorn. Hazy breezy. You've got to give me more warning to a beautiful cover girl. I did really good there. Beautifully man. Vaughn nearly said something incredibly incriminating.

Mmm. Oh, oh, oh. He murdered a man. Not incriminating. You murdered a man. I did murder. You murdered a man. Half a man.

Half of it was you, half of it was someone else. 724. Okay, Tinder's trying a new feature. You know how they like kind of tested on a few accounts before they spread it far and wide? Tinder's new height filter feature is sparking a lot of debate online because anyone below six foot, I guess,

in the male category is feeling like they might be a little bit left out. We stand our short kings. And we stand our short kings. Some people do stand a short king. Yeah. Hey, we're all the same size lying out. We stan our short kings. And we stan our short kings. Some people do stan a short king. Yeah. Hey, we're all the same size lying down. We're sort of not.

There is a limit. If you have a short king and a stepladder, you can reach the top shelf too. Absolutely. Pick them up, swing them around. Yeah. Wear them like a backpack. Mummy's little boy.

So rather than like a hard filter, it's you'll indicate a preference and like a sort of a scale and then the algorithm will pick up on that and then kind of weed out the people that don't meet your. Is this just gonna make more people lie about their height? 100%, oh my god yeah, cause if you're a man who's 5'9", which is still, it's a medium man, Because if you're a man who's 5'9", right?

Which is still, it's a medium man. You're gonna hit that into a 10 or an 11, right? Do you know what I mean? And when you're 5'11", when you're 5'11", you're basically 6'. And wear platforms. And wear your little shoe inserts. Or wear thick Doc Martens on your first date. Yeah. Yeah. So this is part of a broader effort

to help people connect more intentionally on Tinder. So basically like, try to find the right person for them. Not have to sift for hours and hours and hours and hours. But also you might, this could work the other way, you might live in a tiny home where someone over six foot is going to be donking their head. So you might want a five foot six guy. Yeah, maybe exactly. For your home. Exactly. You could be a very petitey, sweetie. So you might want a five foot six guy. Yeah, maybe exactly.

Exactly. You could be a very petitey, sweetie. So you could filter out all the over six foot people. And you're like, I don't have the bed nor the house for it. Yeah, but then you, every now and then you do see a five foot, you know, five foot hurricane with a six foot four dude. Yeah.

And you're just like, get it, Quinn. I know, but us tall girls are always like, that's cheeky, man. Yeah, because you want the tall guys., get it, Quinn. I know, but us tall girls are always like, that's cheeky, man. Oh yeah, because you want the tall guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, if you were on a dating app, would you use a height filter as what we just did a quick little poll this morning?

68%, so close. Oh, that was so close to being nice. So close. To 69%, 68% of people said they wouldn't use a height filter. 32% said yes they would. And 30 or 40% are lying. Yeah for sure.

Kaitlyn said I'm six foot one and sometimes I wanna feel petite. So I've met the love of my life who's six foot eight. So I'm winning now. Six foot eight. I get that. I'm five 11-ish and I get that thing where you're like, sometimes it's nice to feel small. But also I've been with shorter men before,

it doesn't matter at all. I never understand the whole height thing, says Kate, is there something, this is something a person has zero control over, why are we still caring about this? Yeah, I know. There are the lifts, the shoe lifts, that's what little control you have over height.

Yeah. What, like a little lift? Yeah, like the little shoe lifts. That's what little control you have over height. Yeah. What like a little lift? Yeah, like the little shoe inserts. Oh, I think you meant like an actual elevator. I know shoes. You mean like picking up your little man and being like, you mean you've got an elevator for them in your house for them? I would say, yeah, oh, there's quite a few comments online, people saying this is just going to help people to lie about their age for sure.

Their height, you mean? people to lie about their age for sure. Oh their height you mean? Sorry, lie about their height. What's next, is there gonna be a weight filter for men? Oh! Like men saying what kind of weight woman that they would want. Oh yeah right. Cause it is a little bit, it's very judgy. Some men prefer tall women,

some women prefer short men, who cares? Cause we're just assuming the short kings are gonna get. Oh no, absolutely, it lets you pick a preference in height that might be smaller, it might be tall. But, historically and societally, it may not be a great thing for our short kings for whom we stand.

It's being tested, so looking like it'll roll out on Tinder. Yeah, if you're on the Tinder. Sometime soon. Have a little looky-poo to see if this filter is available to you. Well, the Otago Daily Times have reported that a young teenager, they haven't listed the age, nicked his parents' car for a joyride and was soon found ringing his mom and dad

after getting the car stuck in a hedge. He called his parents at 7 a.m. sitting in the car in the hedge that he had crashed into and police had the car towed and the teenager was referred to youth aid for follow-up so that means under 18. Naughty. Naughty, naughty, naughty. Stealing your parents car is like so old-school naughty. I wonder if he even had a license. When did he take the car? What's that? When did he take the car? If he called them at 7am.

They didn't know that he'd taken the car. I imagine not. So it could have been out for hours. Jesus. And then into a hitch, how embarrassing. Not even a ditch, like back out of it. Back out of it, Jaden. Just into a bush, Jaden. It's definitely a Jaden. It's a J name.

It's definitely a J name. J or a K. I never did anything this naughty when I was a kid. I never even snuck out. Did you? No. I was more bratty. Cause you've got big sneak out energy. I know, I know. No, I had a good curfew so I never broke it and I was more bratty. Big sneak out energy.

I know, I know. No, I had a good curfew so I never broke it and I was so afraid. Like my parents would be so upset. Oh yeah, I wouldn't cross-patsy. I was more naughty at school than I was at home. Were you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, authority. I was like, absolutely not. Really? You didn't respect the authority? No, because they didn't respect me. And respect is earned, not given.

Wow. Wow, okay. And I probably said something like that to the teachers and they went, shut up. You're lucky your parents are paying us. You were lucky I wasn't. You were in the room 10 years earlier, you would have had that sass smacked out of your mouth. Oh God, yeah.

But I definitely had friends who used to nick off with their parents' cars and whatnot. Really? Yeah, yeah. I never took my parents' car without permission. What I did when I was out, it's a different story. I may have fabricated the- Told a couple of paupies to get the car. We're just going to the movies, mum.

Yeah. I love those memes. But my brother wrote down the kilometres before I left, and then this is before Google Maps had mapped it out. Your brother's such an arc. Yeah, such an arc. And then he'd be like, well, if you only went to the movies, how come there are 54 unexplained kilometres on the clock? That's a bit of a show. Yeah because I have friends Philip.

Yeah you see those memes you're like when you told your parents that you were at a movie but you're really asleep on a field with alcohol poisoning. So this is the question we want to ask this morning after a Dunedin teenager stole his parents car and got stuck in a hedge, were you a naughty kid? Yeah. No, no stories of over 18 because then you're just a criminal. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it's up to the age of 18. Yeah. 18 and below. Maybe even as a child you were naughty. What about those kids that you don't even know how someone can be so naughty when they're like eight and they steal a car. They're just so naughty. So naughty. Remember I stole when I was a kid, I used to steal people's stuff from their bags

when I was like five or six. It was weird, like klepto thing. Right. What? Yeah, grew out of it. Did you ever do the lunch thing? You'd steal someone's lunch and lock yourself in the cubicle, yum up all their lunch and go back to the cubicle. Yeah, I used to steal their lunches,

I used to steal their keychains, like pens and pencils. Really? Jumpers, soft toys. Jumpers are an absolute criminal. Weird, eh? And then I used to come home with his stuff and my mum was always like, what is happening? And then I just don't really remember growing out of it.

Yeah. I did. Do you get a lighting for that? And your mum would call your auntie, Magpie, and say she just keeps bringing home shiny objects. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's kind of what it was like. It's a family trait.

Okay, 0800 Dials at M, give us a call now, text through 9696. Oh god, we've got naughty kids messaging in already. Love this. Were you a naughty kid? A young teenager, they don't list the age, was found by Dunedin Police after he called his parents because he took the parents' car and got stuck in a hedge. I mean, shame, you know, shame.

So we want to know, were you a naughty kid? Obviously under the age of 18 for these stories. Yeah, dude. There are so many, so many naughty, naughty stories coming in. Brendan, were you naughty? Very naughty. Every Brendan's got a naughty streak. What did you do naughty Brendan?

Well when I was 16 my mum used to go out on holiday quite often and she would not let me use her car. So I had her car key cloned, not just coffee but coke because there's mobiliser. And I would steal her car while she was away so I'd pay for petrol and drive my friends around. Yeah. And I got the phone, I would steal the car at night when she was a bit asleep, just so I didn't pay for her petrol. You cocky shit.

You got so cocky you were getting away with it. You stole it when she was home. Did you ever get caught? No, never. Does she know to this day? No, she doesn't know. I reckon Christmas, this Christmas, just tell her. Let's just like, let's just share. I still got the cloned car key, so I could just give it to her

and she'd be like, what the hell's this? And she's still got the car? Oh, no, no, she gets a new car every couple of years. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Clone those, clone those. Clone those, clone those. Brendan, thank you. Rebecca, you were a naughty kid?

Morning, yes, a little bit, but it was fun. Okay, yeah, of course. Yeah, it is fun, that's why we do it. What was the worst you did? Okay, so I'm from a little place in Hawke's Bay. My friend's dad was a sharing contractor when we were 14, it's still at high school. He was away for the weekend,

so we thought we'd go around all week and create this big ass party we sold tickets sharing a week 10 buses and paid their money. We literally had like a notebook that we wrote down everybody's name that had paid their money it gets better. We were 14 so we had to then employ the local country bus driver to go and buy the alcohol for the party. But I told my mum that we were doing baking for a two year old nieces of my friend that she let me take the cake mixer. I rocked out with all the baking dishes knowing full well this wasn't even going to happen. But the party got sort of out of hand.

And at one point, it was about a couple of hundred on the backyard. And and then I looked around at one point there was about a couple of hundred kids on the backyard and then I looked around at one stage and I thought those bottles looked familiar and someone had broken into my friend's dad's home brew shed and they were all just dishing out all the bottles. Oh no! We had her older brother at the gate, like, packing everyone down. I remember seeing horses tied up at the gate. Like, oh my God. What?

Oh my God. And then about nine o'clock, mum had said, like, you need to ring me and let me know if you need a hand. I literally shut that whole party down to silence at nine o'clock while I rang my mum in front of like about 150 kids and pretended that the baking was all going all good.

We were 14 in high school and my mom was a teacher there. Did you get away with it long term? Like when? Because obviously this sounds... It's because they were in the school on Monday and all the kids in the classes were talking about the school lands party. Oh my god, your mum. On the weekend. Yeah, she was like, I heard you organised something on the weekend. It was over. Like you couldn't, we were in a small town.

You just couldn't. Oh wow. There's no hiding small town parties. Rebecca's... We've got to make you caller of the week. What a yarn. What a yarn. That's so funny.

Caller of the week. All thanks to Chemist's Warehouse, home of the biggest brands at the lowest prices. We've got a Chemistist Warehouse, home of the biggest brands at the lowest prices. We've got a Chemist Warehouse price back. I get those accolades from you every morning on my way to work and I love it, love it. Thank you Rebecca. Call up for a yarn anytime please. She sounds like she's got a couple on board. I probably will.

I'm so excited letting me share that cool story and those life memories that we all talk about. Yes, so good Rebecca, thank you. Some messages in. Wow, a lot of you naughty kids out there. So many naughty listeners. This is why we all get on so well. I had a six week spree of getting myself in trouble when I was young.

We set a playground on fire, accidentally. Stolen mascara, got caught, was a general pain in the ass, but after having the cops bring me home and they knew my dad, well, the shame was real, I stopped being a dickhead after that. Yeah, sometimes that's all you need is a free ride in the comp car. Yeah. When I was seven, I was so desperate for a horse, I stole a backpack full of horse toys from a store. Mum took me to the police station to try to teach me a lesson. Didn't work.

Two years later, a friend and I stole two live miniature horses from a circus and managed to hide them for three days. What? Until the owner of the property found them down the back of their property in the long grass. Miniature horses! They're still miniature pony! Three of them! That's wild. Two of them! And they hid them for three days. Brilliant, honestly. So good. That's Ruslan, you'd be shot in the wild west for that.

So many messages, keep your texts and calls coming through. 9696 0800 DALSATM, were you a naughty kid? People who were naughty when they were growing up, and I tell you what, who joins us on the phone right now. Damien. He's back. Good to hear. Damien, now we don't have as long as we had

for you last time when you told us about the mirror saga, okay? No, it'll be a short one. Now were you a naughty kid Damien? What happened? So yeah, I think I was about 15 and my dad had this Datsun station wagon and he was sort of teaching me how to drive it in the backyard. Because we had a massive backyard in Featherston. Oh, beautiful Featherston. Oh no, it wasn't beautiful in the 80s, I'll tell you that. Yeah, no.

Anyway, so we went to work one day and I was like 10 feet tall and bulletproof, I know what I'm doing. So I was driving around the backyard and then I looked down and I was like, oh, what's this thick thing? Which ended up being the handbrake. And I was like, oh, it'll be like that movie,

Bullet with Steve McQueen. I'll go really fast around the corner of the yard, pull the handbrake and I'll get the car sideways. Yeah, you gotta learn some time. Yeah. So there I am, being Steve McQueen, got the car really fast and then I went, pulled the handbrake and the car slid, took out my mum's lemon tree and ended up in the cookhouse. In the cookhouse! What is it like in the movies when someone goes through the cookhouse, there's like an explosion of feathers. And then there's a chicken in the driver's seat. In the 80s, I'm guessing you got a hiding.

Yeah, so this was like, my old man was ex-army, so he was real old school. So I don't know how, but he turned up within an hour and he looked at me, went over pulled the distributor cap off a car, told me to get inside and then it was almost like when's the hiding gonna happen? Yeah. And then the next day I was going to school and then it just happened I was walking out the door. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A delayed hiding. You want to surprise them with a hiding. Back in the days when you could give them a hiding, a surprise hiding was the best sort. Damien, thanks mate, good to hear from you again. Love to hear from you. Some more messages in. I do want to ask him how that mirror is going. Oh how's the mirror going? It's still on the wall.

Yeah, still there, that's good. You chose the right screws. Yeah, you did in the end. Great screws. Yeah, some messages. Were you a naughty kid? Got kicked out of Henderson Mall 20 years ago for shooting cap guns, having a food fight and a general bad attitude. Shooting cap guns. I stole my dad's car. He had two.

Like that makes it any better. Yeah. For a week during the school holidays to go stay at my best friend's house. Also took his bedroom TV so we could watch TV in her room. Told her parents my dad was cool with it. But he was not cool with it. He was not cool with it. He was not cool with it.

He was not cool with it at all. When I was 13 or 14 living in Australia, some mates and I wheeled about 25 boat trailers, boats on trailers on our street to the middle of the road in the middle of the night, including our wine to avoid suspicion. The sight of confusion in the morning, the whole street was very much worth it. So that's just chaos there. That's just an agent of chaos. Also they would have stuck out like a sore thumb,

just laughing teenagers and everyone's like puzzled. I went to school in Bangkok and did a lot of crazy stuff, but the funniest one I always remember was we'd go around to our friend's house whose dad was the Russian UN delegate, he'd play guitar for us and get wasted. So when he'd pass out, we'd take his car out, joy riding around Bangkok, because it had UN licensed places and the police never pulled over.

Whoa! What a wild story! That's so naughty. We got in trouble for drinking at school when I was 14. Part of our punishment was making a survey on alcohol abuse, making a PowerPoint and doing a presentation to all the house assemblies the next week. The local newspaper got wind of it and put us on the front page for being model students with warning of alcohol rather than students who are forced to do this because they're amazing at school

party at a mates place when his parents were away when we were young someone stole his dad's weed plant hard to report that to the police yeah push ma got put on the carport roof barbecue was hoisted up to the top of the tree and someone kicked every rail off a person rail, I would... Oh that's ruthless. I've moved from kid that would have done that to dad who will kill you for doing it. You did some shitbag things, Vaughan. I had a list of stuff I could have added to this. You've got some karma coming to you.

Yeah you do. In the form of your two children. Mmm. Play ZM's Fletchborne and Hayley. And we've waited long enough for season three of Sex.Live. you do in the form of your two children. Mm. And we've waited long enough for season three of Sex.Live. Morgan Penn's in studio. Yeah, I know, you just put your foot up aimed at me. I know, bad Māori, but honestly I'm so excited. Today it's out, it's already out wherever you get your podcasts, we did check this morning.

My inner panic she was like, can you see it? So I can see it, it's up. Episode one of season three. It's live. I'm feeling vulnerable. I bet you are because this season is, not to say that your other seasons weren't vulnerable. Far apart. I have so many people I know and love at the moment

re-listening to one and two to get prepared. And yeah, like the things that they're saying to me, I'm like, I forgot about that. I forgot about that. Oh yeah, look, we were on a wild ride back then, weren't we? Yeah, but season three is very much dealing with matters of the heart for Morgan Penn.

Yes, and unfortunately, or fortunately for the listeners, there's still a wild ride that goes with my heart, because I was a young woman who wanted to taste everything. Yeah. She really was. I feel like what's great is if you listen to season one and season two, you get this image of Morgan, but we don't know the backstory behind how and why she is the way she is. Whereas season three, I feel like so much of me, even just as your friend, I'm like, oh. Oh, that makes sense.

We keep saying, we're like, that's an origin story. Now that's why she's into this. That's why she likes that. That's why she's still looking for love. The kids are calling that the lore. The lore. L-O-R-E. The lore of Morgan.

Oh my God, like the Hobbit stories. Yeah, well there's a lore established within a world, right, and it's kind of everybody's backstory, origin story, the lore. That's right. So because in this season, it's definitely not short of bombshells. No, and I guess these are things

that I haven't told many people, especially not like my parents, who also listen to this podcast. And I don't mind them. Mama cares. Mama cares is gonna be beside us. and I don't mind them. Mama cares. Mama cares is going to be beside us. We love Mama cares. What could be said to shake the foundations of Mama cares?

Honestly when you told that story that I know you're referring to now and said that your mum doesn't know about this I was like oh Patsy would throw down. Finding out about this later in life. My mum would throw down. Finding out about this later in life. My mum would throw down. I think my mum was hyper vigilant and really over protective. And so I think I was looking for loopholes wherever I could to find my freedom and I was horny. Yeah. So I was doing all sorts of stuff and some of the things I was doing as you're here in episode one was right under her nose. Right under her nose.

In the same room. Yeah. Wow. Very much so. But thankfully you had a watchful guardian angel in the form of Carl Fletcher. I do. He makes an appearance. Yeah, I'm going to be, I know about this. Yeah, you're in a couple of episodes actually of, because of where we are in your life.

Yeah, Morgan and I have known each other for, how long has it been now? Well I was 15 when I met you. Yeah, Morgan and I have known each other for, how long has it been now? Well, I was 15 when I met you. Yeah, you were. Yeah, I was working at a radio station and Morgan was doing work experience. Yeah. And that's how I first met Morgan. Yeah, I know.

And we've been friends ever since. Yeah, I know. It's crazy. And you've actually played quite a large part of one of these stories, which is. Hero, not villain. Hero, hero. Hero, not villain. No villain in sight here.

Wild type, that was so long ago too. Sexy hero though, I will say. Very sexy hero. Thank you, thank you. Did he have his poker shell necklace on at the start of his life? Excuse me, those are cool now. Yeah they are. Were they cool at the time when you were wearing them?

Yeah they were. Yeah they were. It was silver, it was a big silver chain. I had a silver one as well. Yeah, I did, yeah. It was very cool, thank you. Sorry. Wow, okay, just mock me.

Okay, just mock me. But also this season as well, we're deep into the home play. Oh, yes. I think people were like, oh no, is it gonna be home play again? We're like, yes, there's home play every episode. Well, I saw how much this expanded you

over the two seasons. Oh my God, well listen, thank you. Listening back myself. Expanded you. Like one myself. Spent it you. Like one of those, what are those things, little C, those things that expand in the water? Like a sponge? It's called a sponge hon.

Like a grow your husband. Yeah, like one of those things, you grow it in water. You know those knickety things. Yeah, well I did expand like a grow your own husband. Sure, but seriously. Expand your horizons I think is the full term you were looking for there. You've had your horizons.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, well, but still tight. Anyway, there was, I, in season one, when I listened back to it. Jesus Christ, I apologize for that. I don't know what his, I have no idea, I'm just trying to talk about the journey of me as a person, as a woman and a sexual being.

Yes please. Morton's choking on his porridge. In season one, I'll listen to it. I don't know what you guys are laughing at. In season one, you'll listen back and I'm quite prudish about some things. Yes. Well not prudish, but I was like, oh Morgan! Now season three, I was like, yeah and what?

Well I'm very excited. The new season is out wherever you listen to your podcast. Right now you can catch it and then every episode drops every hump day. Amazing. Morgz so excited. Thanks darling. I'm so excited to be on the journey with you again. Morgan Penn, thank you so much.

Next on the show, you took your friendship with Shannon, producer Shannon to another level yesterday. I did a level I haven't even taken it to with either of you. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. It's a miserable grey day over most of the country today. It is, but you wouldn't know it looking at me because I'm glowing bronze. You are.

I know. Like I look out the window, it's grey and then there you are. It's like you've just come back from Hawaii. I know. Like I look out the window, it's grey, and then there you are, it's like, you've just come back from Hawaii. Oh, I know. Well, we've got a big celebration on Thursday night as an industry to celebrate some achievements. So the girls, we start prepping early. You may even notice as well, my hair's slightly longer.

Hair extensions. You wanna got my hair, I always wear hair extensions, but I got them replaced yesterday and we were cutting them and we were like, leave them a bit, leave them a bit, you know? What, whose hair is it? Some- Just some girl from-

Well, it is ethically sourced, but whatever you decide that that means is what it is. Does ethically sourced mean the person doesn't, knows that the hair's getting cut and put into thing, but unethically- No, it means they're not in a cage. Unethically- But unethically they're caged. Ethically sourced mean the person doesn't know that the hair's getting cut and put into thing, but Yeah. No, it means they're not in a cage. But ethically they're caged. Ethically they're in a cage.

Ethically means that they get you and they cut your hair off and they take it away from you. Ethically they're in the grass. And they've got a nice sunny day. But I will say Hailey has only been sourcing ethical hair for the last six months. So before that, fully caged hair. I was caged, complete caged. I was battery farm hair, you know, I was. But the hair aside, we also got a spray tan yesterday.

Now I organised it with, I don't want to shout out tan in the city. Man, being a woman's a handful, eh? It's a lot of work. What are you gonna do before this industry event? Just put my suit on. I was thinking of shaving my head, mate. Yeah, I'll shave my head and that's it.

Yeah, I can't find a dress that makes me feel like I don't want to cry at the moment. So I have to go do that. Oh, Haley. You look lovely in that red dress. You wouldn't be able to look at me. The honkers are so out in it. Like put them away.

It's a lot, it's a lot of honker. Anyway, we went to tan in the city yesterday and they shouted me and Shannon a spray tan so that we could get our glow on. Carmen opted out because she's got a fresh scabby tat. She's scabby. She's got scabby tat. Scabby at the moment.

Hey, all tattoos get scabby. I'm not scabby. Wait a minute. That would only be the tattoo itself wouldn't tan well. Yeah, because it would go all like tiger bread. Yeah. It would go like, the tan would cling to the dry scabby bits and it would look terrible. And also if your tattoo's still fresh and open you don't put anything on it.

Tattoos are an open wound. Well so she's vegan so it's not healing fast. It's not healing fast enough. So long iron plating. It's an iron thing. But anyway, Shannon and I went and you guys have had spray tans before but you weren't so involved. We did a funny thing for work didn't we? We went along and you guys have had spray tans before, but you've, but that's quite involved. We did a funny thing for work, didn't we?

We went along and got, but it was a machine. Nothing funny about it, I looked gorgeous. Yeah, I bet, you blew. We went really orange. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but I think it was a machine. It was a wood-mated, wasn't it? I feel like we did stand up like this

and then just slowly turn. No, no, no. It just coated us. You've gotta get the personal experience. I don't think we had the panel beater experience. No. It was like being a battered up Honda that's been repainted. Well, Shannon and I met up yesterday for our appointment together.

Now we didn't share the booth. I will say we were not doing the poses nude side by side. Shannon went in first and got her spritz on. So wait, a lady stands there while while you stand there and just goes. She says, you know, point your leg, point your arm. I did have to say, would you hold your boobs up? Which is always a confronting thought. Oh, because then otherwise it doesn't get down underneath.

And you have to do a little squat, so you don't get a line under your arms. I don't get that, but I get the pop your back, pop your back back, so that you can get under the line of your bum. But I will say, like, fantastic. Pop that back. I've never felt, I've say, fantastic. Pop that back!

I've never felt better. You look amazing, Bates. Lift them titties and pop that back! Literally. Now what you gonna do with all that rap? Lift them titties and pop that back! You basically have to do the YMCA and it's like, it's a lot, but it's so much better going to a person.

Mate, you do that naked in front of them. Yeah, stranger essentially. So they see everything. Yeah. Everything, yeah. Including the squat. Including the squat. Wow.

So you gotta get it all. We don't wanna have lines. They've seen it all. Yeah, of course. But it's a woman's space. She makes you feel very comfortable. Yeah, shout out Jess. She's amazing.

You've got two curtains. There's a door. And you gotta think she's seen a million bodies that day in that week. Yeah. Well the chances yours is the worst, you know? Anyway, so. I reckon they'd tell you if it is.

Yeah, worst of the day. I reckon it's the same with people who give Brazilians, they're like, miss, I've just under my obligation as a beauty therapist had to tell you. Worst of the week. That's the mankiest one I've seen this week. Damn, awesome, thank you. I suspected, but you confirmed it for me.

It's yuck. Do you know the thing that brought the intimacy to the next level is Shannon was gonna Uber home with a fresh splater and you know you're like really dark when you first get it. Oh no, your rating will go down because you'll put tan on the seat. I thought you were rating a girl down

for being accused of doing brown face. We were on the borderline. I'll take a video. You were wearing your sombrero yesterday too, I believe Shannon. Yeah and a bindi. And shouting ariba ariba ondale ondale. It was a bold choice but it felt right.

Yeah. I said to Shannon, I was like no absolutely not I'll drive you back to your house. Yeah. And I think the intimate thing was this is my least favourite part of the spray tan is you can't put your underwear or anything else back on. So your loose boobs, no undies, and I just had a sack on, you had some like baggy clothes. And I was sort of trying to tilt my car back

so that my boobs stay up enough. So you're driving like that, and then each bump, it's like, fradumdumdumdumdum. I've got a little fabric shelf I've made with my loose shirt, but not trying to make a shelf, but just enough space that we're not stuck. Skin to skin. I don't want. Skin to skin.

I don't want to skin to skin. So we're both there just sort of wibbling and wobbling our way back past Shannon's apartment. And then what, it just dries? Yeah, then it just dries, then you wash it off a couple of hours later, and then look like I've been bloody on holiday. Yeah, you do.

I look so good. I did say to Hayley, just slow down near my apartment. I don't want you to get robbed or anything. Because I didn't want to stop it by her house. just stop one lights up and I'll just tuck and roll. So I just got out very quickly. I slowed to a safe speed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Open the door and tuck out.

Just so no one else got in. And then she had to do the braless run where you're kind of holding up your boobs and you don't want anything. You're like, back into the apartment. Anyway, we look hot. Yeah, you ready? And it was a milestone for us.

It is a milestone. I feel closer to you. I feel deeply bonded. Deeply, deeply bonded. Arriba. Oh no. It's like your best friend just got cancer. Wow, damn it.

Play ZM's Flashpoint in Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do on a tree. Oh no, no, no, my friends. It's a berry that grows on a herb. Get out of here. No, it's not. You're just being silly. Hey, look, that's like my banana bowl that I talked about yesterday. It's good bowling. Oh yeah, it's a bowl made of bananas

that you put, like, surrounding bananas and you put bananas in it. Hehehehe. What will she think of next? I'm an adult, do you know what I mean? Yeah. You just spend your money on what you want, it's crazy. All right, well, a berry, botanically speaking, a berry is a fruit that develops from a single flower

with one ovary. Okay. And has three distinct layers. The exocarp, known as the outer skin. We're all familiar with the banana's outer skin, aren't we? Because we don't eat it. Yes. The mesocarp, the middle, usually the part we eat,

which is the delicious banana. And endocarp, a thin layer surrounding the seeds. Now we've kind of bred seeds out of the banana, but the banana as it stands. Imagine if you had a banana with seeds. You'd have to be like, ooh, I had a mandarin the other day in Australia, and it had pips in it.

I was like, what are you doing Australia? They need to have their mandarin going. And their apples are bad. Yeah, their apples are bad and their mandarin's are embarrassing. People wanna move there? Get a life. Get a grip, dickhead. And their apples are bad. Yeah, their apples are bad and their mandarins are embarrassing. People wanna move there? Yeah. Get a life.

Get a grip, dickhead. And also a berry is fleshy throughout and doesn't have a hard pit or stone, like specifically one, and typically it's multiple seeds. So bananas grow from a single flower with one ovary. Their fruit has three layers. They're fleshy all the way through

and they technically have tiny undeveloped seeds. Sometimes if you let a banana go brown, oh, I just ate my brown banana before. Yuck, you're manky. You can see, I love a brown banana. You can see the tiny little black specks inside the banana. Yeah, I know what you're talking about.

They're undeveloped seeds, but they are. They are good for a banana cake and that's it. Or a muffin, yeah, yeah. Brown bananas. I like my bananas slightly green. Nah, I like them dotty. I like them dotty, they're sweet. Yeah, you're manky.

Yeah, I'll even need a rotten, bruisey bit. Yum, yum, yum. Manky. But, I'll even need the rotten bruisey bit. Yum, yum, yum. Manky. But, you know what, if we're talking about berries, strawberries aren't a berry, even though berry is in the title, because they come from a flower with multiple ovaries. Those little seeds on the outside

are actually individual fruits, and the fleshy part is actually a swollen receptacle. Wank, wank, nudge, nudge, not an ovary. Wow! So they're an aggregate fruit, not a berry. And the banana plants aren't trees, they're giant herbs. So if you see, you had banana trees on the boundary of your property, didn't you?

Yeah, but they didn't sprout bananas. No, because it wasn't the right climate for it. Yes, but comedians Chris Parker and Brinley Stent, they had a banana tree in their backyard and it sprouted a bunch. It needs a lot of summer. I know up north you can grow bananas if you really put your mind to it. Absolutely fascinating. Why don't you just buy them at the supermarket? But have you been in the islands and had like Hawaiian bananas straight from like a banana tree?

No. Oh my god, they taste so sweet. Because obviously our bananas are picked when they're green and then like refrigerated all the way here. Shipped over here, yeah. You get a fresh nana. It's like an apple straight off a tree. Amazing. It's just a completely different taste. But the banana plant isn't a tree, they're a massive herb. Because technically the trunk is just really tightly packed leaf stalks that come out at

the top and then the bananas grow at the end of them. So today's fact of the day is the banana is not a fruit that grows on a tree, it's a berry that grows on a herb. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do Play ZM's Fletch-Born and Hayley. Well we're officially the 4th of June today so we're in winter. Officially in winter. Oh no. Canterbury expecting snow in the coming days, a cold front coming over the country. Yes.

A miserable couple of days. We're going to be in Christchurch over the weekend. Yeah, so 8 degrees to high at the weekend. That's nuts. I might have to pack a jacket, a proper jacket. It is the season for arguments in the household, or the flat, about's nuts. I might have to pack a jacket, a proper jacket. It is the season for arguments in the household, or the flat, about the heating. Oh yeah.

And secret heaters, flatmates with secret heaters, the power bill comes in, and all hell breaks loose. And when they have those secret heaters, it's always the fan ones that use a lot of energy. Yeah, those little ones that just heat up an element and the fan blows through it. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, like, not efficient.

I've got those, what are those, oil column? Yeah, we love those. Yeah, those are good. But you're not supposed to turn them off, right? You just turn them down. Turn them right down, yeah. But they get crankin'. Those things throw the heat out.

Yeah. They're insane. So good. Yeah, we used to have fights all the time when I lived in a flat of, well, it was supposed to be five and then the plus one sort of, you know the hooks in there so then it was six, seven on the weekends and then the heron joins so that was eight for a while. You didn't even need a heater with that many people under one roof.

No you did because it was a drafty converted two-story villa. In Wellington. In Wellington with a wrangly sash window. And the new boyfriends are never paying any of the power bills are they? But they're using the hot water. Not a dime. Not a dime. This is how the argument starts. So with winter here, we thought we would ask this morning, how bad was the flat argument?

And it doesn't need to be overheating. It could be about anything. Parties, guests. Oh yeah, because there's always the flatmates that maybe, you know when you move from student times into actual professional life, people have jobs. They haven't actually let it go. Never, and some people just want to party on a Wednesday night.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe you brought a date over and they stole your iPod that had a really good playlist on it that wasn't saved on your computer, so you weren't able to ever find that playlist and you think about it all the time. The dates stole the playlist. Really specific.

Did that happen? Yeah, it happened. My flatmate, he brought a guy home and they were like hooking up and then the next day I went out to put some music on. My iPod was gone from the big massive stereo system and I didn't care about the iPod. I'd get a new iPod.

It was that playlist, you know? Okay, OIDHundreddalsatm we want you to give us a call now. You can text us through 9696. This is gonna, I reckon it's going to get heated. How bad was the flat argument? We want to know what the flat argument was about because it's winter and there's a cold front coming

and heating is, I reckon, one of the biggest sources of flat arguments ever. Hell yeah. That and who stole my food from the fridge? When you're broke and you're living in a flat with five other people and they're cranking heat and you can feel the money leaving your bank account, we'll split it five ways.

I won't be up on a jumper. There's so many insane. Where do we start? My flatmate once made a comment about how I parked when we did the communal shopping. I lost it and we didn't talk for a good couple of weeks. Oh, okay. Never comment on a person's parking.

Amongst friends though. It might be one of those driveways where you've got to get around them and then someone's got to leave before the other person and they don't leave the keys out. No, I feel like it was just, they said when they were doing the communal shopping. So I feel like when they got to the supermarket it was how they parked in the supermarket car park. Oh right, it doesn't matter how you park in the supermarket as long as your car's stopped. Yeah.

Well not if you park sideways across them. No, you've got to be quick, just how you park in the supermarket as long as your car stopped. Yeah, well know if you park sideways across Again it doesn't matter how you park your car plenty I had a flatmate flip my beard because I wouldn't share my bread spread with him bread spread Flip the beer cuz I wouldn't share the bread spread. It's bread or bread bread spread That's what I'm thinking. It must be bread. But what? or bread spread? But they wrote bread spread. And that's what I'm thinking, it must be bread spread, but why are we spreading on the bread?

Like Nutella. Nutella or jam? Margarine or was the margarine not even up to the being called margarine, it was called a bread spread? A bed spread. Surely they're saying that the flatmate flipped the bed because they wouldn't share the bed spread. But why would the flatmate be in the bed

and then flip the bed spread? Get your own bed spread. Because sometimes between flatmates, when it is particularly cold in a Wellington flat, it's easier to heat up if you have a little cuddle. Have a bit of a spread in the bread. Have a spread in the bread. I don't know about that. Spread in the bread. Sometimes between flatmates, when it is particularly cold in a Wellington flat, it's easier to heat up if you have a little cuddle. Have a bit of a spread in the bread. Spread the bread. I don't know about that.

Spread the bread. Spread the bread a bit. And then put the bread spread. Spread the bread. Me, studying for uni exams, exam at 8am the next day. Flatmate one, I have decided to have a party. Extra flatmate that we had living in the lounge. I also like to party.

Me. Oh no. Please stop them. No. Me, after three hours of back and forth and it's now 1am rips power cord out of stereo on the wall and throws stereo onto lawn or howl breaks loose. Yeah. There needs to be some respect from the flatmates here. There's an exam the next day. Yeah, there is a good one.

My flatmate is having a bit of a tangent about having a clean every third week, not every fourth week because our other one is away for three months and reckons the one has to do a whole month in a row when she gets back. No. To make up for it. That's no. Because typically she's not there making the mess and she's still paying her rent, but she's not making the mess. Yeah, but then she's also not there using power.

Yeah, it's true. That's what I'm saying. I'm anti the flat man having a clean for a month in a row. Yeah, same. Same. They're not there to make the mess. Yeah. Okay. so many messages. Keep them coming through, 9696 0800 DALSATM.

What was the flat argument about? We want to know how bad the flat argument was. The flat fight, what did you have a little blow up over? Winter's coming, heat is going to be the cause of the debate. One of the biggest flat arguments. Certainly hearing about that. Anonymous, what was the flat argument over? Um, so my flatmate used to always hide the heat pump remote.

Okay. And it just, oh my god, it was just like, are you serious? Yeah. So, silent poetry. But wait, wait, wait, just quickly, were you walking around in a t-shirt and shorts when it was freezing cold and you were like, it's too cold? Maybe. Yeah.

You were just giving big shorts and t-shirt in winter energy in the house. Yeah, my fave. Anonymous. Okay, sorry, carry on. So silent proteus, I would just piss on their, oh, I don't know if I can say that, but I would wee on their shower products. Pfft.

What kind of shower products? Pfft. What kind of shower products are we talking? I don't know, like if they had a loofer, I would. You mucky bitch. Yeah. If they had a loofah, I would... You mucky bitch! You grubby little... Like open up the shampoo bottle and just have a little...

No, you were peeing in the bottle of the shampoo, were ya? No, never touched, never touched. It was just... Just piss on their soap and their loofah. Yeah, and I would just, you know, let it go. Oh, you are so funny. And they never knew. That's so good.

Did you ever get the remote back though, or was he always in control of that? No, I found it. They didn't hide it very well. Right, okay. Amazing. That's so good. I'm not on the seat,

give us your ring. Messages in. Ah. My flatmate was an apprentice sparking, It's so good, I'm not gonna say give us sharing. Message is in. My flatmate was an apprentice sparky and we turned off the heat pump from the outside unit. We were a flat full of girls so we had no idea how to turn it back on. Now I don't think you need to be an apprentice sparky to literally see the massive switch that says on and off

and it's pointed at the off. It's not working, get out there and have a look. But again, let's put some clothes on before we turn the heat pump on, is all I'm saying. Absolutely. But then heat pumps also do keep the house dry. Yeah. Because the cold, wet houses are the problem.

But people put it on 32. Oh I know, no, 21. Tops. 21 tops. Tops, yep. Heat. 21. Heat, 21.

Is the heat the sun or the cool? The sun. The sun is the heat. I know. When you want to cool it you go snowflake. Snowflake means... No, but snowflake means it's cold outside. No, snowflake means you want to be cold.

Sun means you want to be hot. Always think of the symbol as what you want to feel. It took me years. Dead inside. And you know the one that's the drip, that's actually dry. Which is confusing because... Because you don't want to be You want to be wet? Yeah, okay. Mm-hmm. You don't want to be wet Okay, well the icons are confusing is like why not just put hot and cold. Yeah, like why do we need a simple?

Heat yeah, oh dry. Oh, yeah Get Stephen Fleming onto that. Actually, I will. I'll get him on the phone. As soon as possible. Because he makes them, doesn't he? He makes them all. He makes them by hand, personally.

I wanted to keep our pet rat Geronimo down in Dunedin. The rest of the flat didn't. I used a great chocolate into a little cup because I knew Geronimo liked it. Now Geronimo's a wild rat at this stage of proceedings. A wild rat? They ended up sprinkling rat poison on the chocolate and before graduating that year. I'm pretty sure I saw Geronimo again, so maybe he survived.

Sheepers! Somebody else said, I got home and I just needed to duck into the house for five minutes and I ran in and my flatmate said, you need to move your car and you need to leave. I said, I'm going to be five minutes. And then I looked out the window at the three minute mark and they'd backed the ute up to the front of my car. We're just pushing it out with like shunting Yeah, my flatmate would leave you sanitary pads on the bathroom floor I never said anything because I don't like confrontation, but it was pretty disgusting Confrontation but I would you've got to say something. Yeah. Even a passag text or email.

Oh my God. Oh, there's so many. There's just so many. Fat, flat, fight. I hooked up with a guy in my flatmate's room. Another flatmate caught me coming out of her room with him and let's just say things got real tense, real awkward. Why weren't you hooking up in your own room?

You might've had a manky mattress. You didn't have a manky mattress. Manky mattress. Yuck, on the a manky mattress? Manky mattress. Yuck, on the floor, nothing underneath it. No ventilation. Oh yeah, and wet, so there's a layer of mold. Yeah, totally. Also, then you don't have to clean up your room.

Perfect. Yeah. Flat argument that stands out for me is, before going away, I did some washing and hung it up nicely on my own clothes walls in our sun slash drying room. But apparently I had put the clothes on wrong and I came back to a pile of damp clothes on my bed a week later as they didn't like

the way it looked on my clothes horse. I had also locked my bedroom door. So I don't know how they got in and what the problem was with how it hung my clothes on the clothes horse. Oh God. Oh, I just, you couldn't, I just, yeah. Go back to flatting.

It just has been so many years since I've flatted. Yeah. I forgot. These stories are all just touching me. I had a shared accommodation experience at the weekend and it was like, we, at the end of it, we were like, that was just real nice. And I was like, but that was, it was one weekend.

Yeah. It was real nice. Everybody kind of did stuff. When the kids were, yeah. But you do stuff when you are just away for a weekend. 100%. Yeah. And when you're back in your mind, you're like, we could all live together.

No, you couldn't. You start sitting in your muck. Yeah. No. We had a fireplace in our flat and the flatmate was always the first time so she'd light the fire to get the wood in. After a month into winter,

she complained that she should pay less on power because she was the reason we didn't need to use heaters and the hot water was hot, must have been a wetback. I jokingly said, well, I shouldn't have to pay less on power because she was the reason we didn't need to use heaters and the hot water was hot, must have been a way back. I jokingly said, well I shouldn't have to pay for it either because my parents and I were ones that went and got and split all that wood. Now that is, if you're supplying wood for the flat, there's gotta be a discount on power.

Yeah, that's why when people start arguing and go tip for tap with power, I don't use this. I don't, yeah, but you use this and I. We just split it, Yup. Be conscientious. I mean the person lighting the fire rules, they're getting home, they're warming the house to other people, but you, monetary-wise, that's not comparable to a person. As a kid that was made to split wood for two weeks every summer holidays, lighting a fire, diddums to you, grab an axe, start splitting.

Yeah. See ya, see ya later. Actually I'm gonna have to stop you there, that's copyrighted. Susie Cato's a very good friend of mine. start splitting. Yeah.