ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - May 12th, 2025

Episode Date: May 11, 2025

Woman snuck a cooked chicken past airport security SLP - Do you buy reduced to clear products Review of Another Simple Favour The Beckhams are feuding Top 6 Brad Pitt Maccas orders Trend Alert - Jane Austen BangHinge dating profile checklist Hayley and Fletch's Lovely Welly day Are you the  loser sibling? Vaughan's Horse pics Couples buffet trend Fact of the Day What was your parents social media woopsie?  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify

or wherever you get your podcasts From the ZM Podcast Network This is Flesh, One and Hayley's Big Pod Thanks to Animates Making happy happen for pets ZM's Fleshch, Vaughan and Hayley. Thank you, Brenna for Rodkin. Good morning.

Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Two minutes past six. The boys are back in town. You're back in studio? Yeah. Yeah, back in studio. Oh, yeah. Oh, there it is.

I thought I was getting away with it too, actually. It's better than it was on Saturday. See, everyone who came to the show on Saturday, good Lord, we persevered for an hour with that voice, didn't we? Hayley then did a late night comedy show. Oh, and it was so bad. It was so bad. I was like, I don't know.

You need to be hoovering up the lozenges, Hayley Sproul. I've got lozzies. I've got lozzies. It'll be gone in Hayley Sproul. I've got lozzies. Good stuff. I've got lozzies. It'll be gone in a couple of days. I've got my dirt pills. Coming up on the show, Add to Cart continues again this week. So we've been doing this for the last couple of weeks. Super easy.

You just listen for the first item at 8 o'clock. We'll add that to the cart. And then at midday and 4, the first caller through at 5 o'clock with Brian Clint. If you can name all of those three items, you win thanks to One Roof Property. So that first item coming through at 5 o'clock with Brian Clint. If you can name all of those three items, you win thanks to One Roof Property. So that first item coming up at 8 o'clock. Also coming up, the girlies, Shannon and Carwin, are going to do a review of the new Blake Lively film,

A Simple Favour. I haven't watched it yet, but there's a lot of talk around it because obviously Blake Lively hasn't done anything since all the other scandal. And I don't know that it's all the other scandal and I don't know that it's a favourable review. I don't know.

I don't know if it's going to be a good review. It doesn't sound like it's going to be. We're going to ask soon for Scylla Little Pole do you buy reduced to clear items?

And I love a special. I love a reduced to clear anything at the supermarket. Give it a rinse. We've got the results for you soon but next a woman's gone viral for something

she got through airport security. Well yesterday I was pretty good. I got pulled over both bags. Both bags got pulled aside for you? There was nothing for it. It was fine. What was it in the end?

It wasn't your... The key tower always blows them away because they think it's like a ukulele. When did you... But the key tower surely goes into the special fragile. No, I carry it on. It's too flimsy. Oh, you carry it on. I can see the questions then. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they's too flimsy. Oh, you carry it on. I can see the questions then.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So they think it's like a ukulele because of its size and then they see all this electronics and they're like, what's that? Right. And I don't know what was in the other bag. I think it was just a mess.

I think it was literally just a mess. It was just a mess. Play Zed-Ems, Fleshborn and Hayley. The woman has gone viral for getting a rotisserie chicken, an entire bachelor's handbag, into an airport. You're not allowed to. Why aren't you allowed to take a chook on board?

Well, I would have thought it would have been all the liquid at the bottom of the bag would have raised suspicions. More than 100 mil. Or it's a juicy, the whole thing's a juicy kind of liquid. So you're saying the chicken, it could be possible that the chicken wasn't cooked in its own juices. It was cooked in some sort of of liquid. So you're saying the chicken, it could be possible that the chicken wasn't cooked in its own juices. It was cooked in some sort of explosive liquid.

Yes. And she's going to get the chicken on board and it's going to become a bomb. I mean, you're not allowed to take food, but if it was domestic, right? Could you take grapes? Why? Because they're full of juice. Like a bunch of grapes? You couldn't take grapes, right? Because they'd be like... You're not allowed to take any fruit. Are we doing'd be like... You're not allowed to take any fruit.

Are we doing international or domestic? You're not allowed to take them on the plane. You're just not allowed to take them off at the other end. Yeah, they're not allowed to arrive. Yeah, obviously there's the biosecurity thing. But if I wanted to take a bag of grapes to eat on the flight, international, you wouldn't be able to, eh? Can you take grapes on a plane? Can you take grapes?

Because she's got a whole roast chicken. That's also going to stink. The whole plane's going to stink like a rotisserie chicken. You can typically bring grapes on a plane in both carry-on and checked-in luggage as they are a solid and not a liquid. No. I don't agree with that. They're a solid full of liquid.

Yeah, Shannon asks, what about a cucumber? A grape is a soup dumpling. 97% water. 97% water. A grape is a soup dumpling. 97% water. 97% water. A grape is a soup dumpling. Is a soup dumpling. A cold, sort of a gazpacho. Yeah, gazpacho.

Gazpacho, a cold soup dumpling. Yeah, yeah. Encased in completely natural surroundings. I mean, sometimes you just need a chop, don't you? No, I mean, she does go on to say, because the internet's just like, why did you do this? It's bizarre. Basically, the video's just like, why did you do this? It's bizarre. She, basically the video's gone viral and she said she did get pulled aside by TSA,

this is in America, for having it in her bag. Oh, you'd stink. You'd stink like chicken. But, you know, once they saw it, they said that, yeah, they can, she can take it through. Oh, so she was allowed to? Yeah, but I don't know if she could take it on a plane. I think the, the, the. I take it on a plane. I think the... I've been on a plane where someone brought

a curry on. Really? And I remember being like, I don't know why the rules. Domestic or international? It would have been domestic, I guess. Oh, no.

I know. No. Yeah, it's just taking it off at the other end that's always the problem. You can take your own food, like when you've got a baby, you can take all the baby food

on board, it's just taking it off at the other end that they don't like. Because can take your own food like when you've got a baby you can take all the baby food on board. It's just taking it off at the other end that they don't like. Because remember I don't know if I was with you guys when I did this but I got one of the bagels

at Wellington Airport and you go through security and they make you put it in this little box. Really? This little plastic like Sistema box and that goes through the security

and then when I got it back out my pickle had fallen off my bagel. Oh no. And I was like well what are we going to do to address that? I would have just thumbed it back in. Well the guy said do you want me to put it back out, my pickle had fallen off my bagel. Oh, no. And I was like, well, what are we going to do to address that? I would have just thumbed it back in.

Well, the guy said, do you want me to put it back on? I said, well, no, but it's been in your plastic container. I don't know what else has been in here. So I had a pickle-less bagel. Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.

And I chose the bagel specifically for the pickle. For the pickle. I love a pickle-less bagel. On a bagel. Yeah. Very upsetting. Nine past six,

silly little poll was next. Do you buy reduced to clear items? Why wouldn't you? It's the same thing but cheaper. Some people are against it. Pooh-pooh it. If it's meat they think it's manky maybe? No. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Hayley. It is so silly, silly, silly That silly little pole Silly little pole

Silly little pole Silly little pole Silly little pole That's a very blue t-shirt. Thank you. Have you just noticed that? I've just noticed how blue the t-shirt is.

I'm shocked he's wearing it because he wore it a lot in Wellington. Yeah, it was literally the first thing when I woke up it was just there. So I was like, you know what, I'm wearing that. It's because he wore it a lot in Wellington. Yeah, it was literally the first thing when I woke up. It was just there. Yeah, Mr. Kells. So I was like, you know what? I'm wearing that. It's very blue. Thank you. He looks nice. No, it is. It's a nice blue on you, but

it does look like it's school sports day and your house colours are blue. Yes, that's the blue. That's the blue it is. Oh my god, it is! Now I can't wear this. It's school house colours. This was my house colour at school. Yeah, dude. You're Sanson. Yeah, this was my studum. You're right. Studum. you're Stutton. You're right. Stutton.

Stutton. Stutton. Stutton Street. Do you think that would be a funny phone-in topic? What was your house name? Dude, absolutely. Oh, yeah, mine was Clams at high school. I bet there were some problematic ones that had to change around,

like, the 80s and 90s. Oh, yeah, the Redskins. And you're like, oh, no, no, no, no. No, no, no. Yeah, whoa. It took the Washington NFL team a lot longer than the mid-90s to change from the Washington Redskins, didn't it? Today on the Cilla Little Pole is, do you buy reduced to clear products? All the time.

Dude, every time. I love looking in that little bin. I love it. Especially if I'm going to cook meat that night. Yeah, same. And it expires tomorrow. Hell yeah, I'm going to get $7 chicken thighs. Well, especially if it's like the organic range.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The good chicken. Yeah. The stuff pumped full of water and hormones. Yeah. Which always seems to be way bigger than the free range chicken. It's weird. So big.

Yeah. And watery. So Little Pole asked this question and 86% of people responded, yes, I do buy reduced declare products. 14% said no. I like this. Okay. I like these numbers.

Alex says, who say no? In this economy? Yeah. In this economy? This economy, Alex. This bloody economy. Do you look at the actual price and you're like,

they actually haven't taken much off of that sometimes. You're like, this meat's going off tomorrow and you're only taking a dollar or two down? Yeah, no, no, cut it in half. No, sometimes it's not even that. I like, occasionally you'll see on Reddit, someone where it says, like, reduce to clear or special, and they pull it up, and it's actually, like,

the same price or more expensive. I love that. That's sort of saving. Cheeky. Cheeky. Ewan said, I'm addicted to that little yellow clearance sticker. Oh, yeah, same. Yeah, that feels good, eh?

Trip D says, and why not? Slight imperfections are lo Oh, yeah. Yeah, same. That feels good, eh? Trip D says, and why not? Slight imperfections are lovable too. Sometimes in the produce section they reduce, like, stuff and you're like, it's fine. Oh, God, yeah.

It's going to stir fry anyway. Mushrooms might be going a bit browner and you're just like, slimy. You're like, who cares? It's going to slimy stir fry. It's going with the goop.

It's going with the goop. It's going to get in a goop sack. Yeah. Oh, good stuff. Get that goop sack. I might do a goop sack It's going with the goop. It's going to get in a goop sack. Yeah. Oh, good stuff. Get that goop sack. I might do a goop sack tonight. That's what I'm in the mood for. Are you?

A bit of rice and a goop sack stir fry. Yeah. Yeah. You can't go wrong. Can't go wrong. Can't go wrong. Katie said, because food is expensive and I'm too old and tired to start an OnlyFans. Well, you're never too old.

Those are your two options. Rejuicically or OnlyFans. Those are the only two. I mean, you can be old on OnlyFans. You've just, it's a tired thing because it's a lot of admin. I remember a friend had it and gave up because it was so much admin.

Well, you've got to reply to everyone and no. A lot of hustle. Keep that content fresh. Yeah, no. There's only so many angles. Yeah, exactly. I've sort of done that angle. Yeah, yeah.

What am I going to do next? Better just to work a nine to five, go to the supermarket, get some reduced to clear chicken, a goop sack. that angle. Yeah, yeah. What am I going to do next? Better just to work a nine to five, go to the supermarket, get some reduced to clear chicken, a goop sack. Much easier. Some marked down mushrooms and have a stir fry.

Some slimy mushies. It's just easy life. Yeah. Way easier than trying to make Liz a horrible dick look appealing. Yeah, horrid. Horrible thing. Horrid.

Hey, you don't be so hard on yourself. I would pay $3.99 a month for you. Thanks, babe. How much? $1.99. Yeah for you. Thanks, babe. How much? $1.99. Yeah, that's my entry level. That's your entry level. He's reduced to Cleo.

He's reduced to Cleo. He's reduced to Cleo. He's reduced to Cleo. He's reduced to Cleo. He's reduced to Cleo. He's reduced to Cleo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got a little yellow sticker on it.

Doing a discount. Adam said I actively seek them out. Dates are simply a suggestion. I think so too. Yeah, totally. As often as I can, hack. You can also type clearance into the Woolies online shopping and it'll bring up a bunch too, not just the odd bunch. That's as I can, hack. You can also type Clarence into the Woolies online shopping and it'll bring up a bunch too, not just the odd bunch.

That's from Steph. Good hack. Really? Type Clarence in. Interesting. I'm going to give that five stars. That's a five-star hack. She's immediately come out with a five-star hack.

Took Shannon over a year. Took Shannon a long time. Ruben said, once I bought reduced to clear fancy tea bags and when I got home and opened the box it was empty well it was reduced to clear you get what you're given yeah that would be a hard one

to go back to the supermarket to and be like this box was empty when I bought it they'd be like yeah pull the other one sure it was mate yeah sure mate

never any good ones for me said Alana she's struggling to find good reduced to clear really maybe it's the time you go like I always kind of sometimes mid mid-afternoon,

they're going through and they're doing it, and you're right there and you're like, pounce, pounce, or early morning. Tessa said, the best part about reduced to clear is rolling the dice on either a succulent meal or an intestinal spring clean. Either way is a win. Yeah, it feels like a win.

It feels like a little win, have a blowout. It could be a couple of kgs down, you know? Yeah, exactly. Bit of gastro. Clear the chute. Lovely bit of gastro. Just to of kgs down, you know. Yeah, exactly. Bit of gastro. Clear the chute. Lovely bit of gastro. Just to kickstart your new healthy eating regime. Yeah.

Gastro. I time my shop for the day and set time when they start marking things down. I've actually been known to follow the sticker lady around for deals. See, my supermarket doesn't have a set time. It's all over the show. I wouldn't even know. No. I just go when I wouldn't even know. No. I just go when I'm available to go.

I've been there and seen them doing it, and I'm like, this must be the time. Yeah. And then the next day or two, they're not doing it then. At a different time. It's a different time. Yeah. Well, get out there, get them reduced to clear. Specials this week.

Far out, give them. Watch out, poor Lego. He's coming for your stick man voiceover. I've seen a lot of this advertised. Watch the trailer. Another simple favour.

Kendrick Lamar is not in the film. Anna Kendrick is. Kendrick, Anna and Lively Blake are starring in the film. It looks like it's very fashionable And it screams ticking boxes for the gals So our gals, Shannon and Carmen watched it

Over the weekend? Yes Movie night? Movie morning? Yeah, we had a little book date We went to Enamored Books Oh, I saw that And we went and watched a little movie with George Burt.

Oh, my God, the room is swirling. The three of us. Yeah. Goodness me. Pretty hot. Okay, so what did you think? Because in your email when you said, should we do a review of this movie, dot, dot, dot.

Wow. Because this is on Prime? Yeah. Yeah, okay. It went straight to streaming. Straight to streaming, which tells you a lot. Oh, don't say it like that. When you say it like that, it sounds like bad.

Well, it's just right. I reckon it might be. I would say just on Google, 2.2 stars. Oh, no. Yeah. I feel like straight to streaming isn't like an indication a movie's bad now. No. Because imagine all the amazing movies that have come out on all the platforms.

Yeah, made for streaming. It feels like it is when the platforms. Yeah, made for streaming. It feels like it is when the first one wasn't straight to streaming. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, it wasn't supposed to be. So this is a sequel to what? A Simple Favour. What is it?

Okay, I don't know. So the first one's A Simple Favour. This one is another Simple Favour. I don't even remember A Simple Favour. Do you think they spent a lot of time on the sequel name when they were brainstorming that? Big marketing meeting. Yeah, like 25 people. I think most of the budget went on that.

Another, and they're like, okay, meeting done. Our Simple Favour, another Simple Favour. Came out in 2018. It got 84% on Rotten Tomatoes, the first one. Yeah, the first one's good. It's like twisty. You don't know what's happening. They're both great actors in it. This one, you can tell that the actresses don't like each other.

Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. Because that was a bit of a rumour-y thing, right, as well, that on set tensions were high. Blake Lively isn't getting the best reputation to be the first person to work with. And I'm not even talking about the drama with the other film.

No. I'm saying in general she comes across a bit cold. Actively, Anna Kendrick has avoided questions about working with her in promoting this film. Really? They didn't promote it together. Like, there is a separation going on here. Okay.

Scandal. Scandal. It's a real weird movie. It's like seven genres, but also doesn't fit any genre at all. It's this mystery thriller comedy. Yeah, like I didn't laugh for the right reasons. What's just mystery thriller comedy. Yeah, like I didn't laugh for the right reasons. And it's a spaghetti western as well.

Yeah. There's the ongoing theme of incest which is happening a lot in media at the moment I feel like. Yeah, it's interesting. And you mentioned the fashion. I would say it's, there's fashion. I don't know if I'd say fashionable.

Wow. I would say you can tell Blake Lively's dressed herself. And if you know what she's like, you'll know what that means. Yes. You can tell Blake Lively has dressed herself. What do you mean? Like she doesn't take to stylists or people telling her what to do? I think she's had a big influence on the wardrobe department

and she's got a very specific style. She does. You know what Shannon actually said when we were watching it? She said, you know that rule where it's like you take off one item before you leave the house? She kind of needs to take off three. She keeps on putting on more. Yeah, you have too many accessories on.

She needs to edit. That hat. Does she get cold though? Maybe she gets cold. Maybe. Your nine necklaces ain't going to warm you up. Yeah, the big Catholic crosses. You need one.

Catholic. Catholic. You mean Catholic. Catholic. Catholic. No, Catholic. Catholic. Catholic.

Catholic. She's hitting the O. She's really honouring the O of Catholic. Catholic. Yeah. I just don't think she needed nine of them. Nah, totally. Look, I would say if you've seen the first movie and you had fun

and you're in the mood for a movie that you're going to be like, what, every two seconds, watch it. It's free. I mean, if you've already got Prime, it's free. I think I'll watch it for the pure enjoyment of watching trash and knowing I'm watching a bit of trash. Yeah, totally. And we had a great time because we were with our girls laughing.

Yeah. Or maybe it's a plain movie if you're just wanting to waste some time. Really not selling it. It's not a plane movie because you said there's incest. I don't want people to think I'm watching that shit. No. Not super graphic. Can I just read a couple of Rotten Tomato reviews?

Because I feel like the girls are trying not to tear down women this early in the morning. Okay. Fernanda says, Possibly the worst acting and dialogue I've ever witnessed in my life. One star. One of the worst. Carolyn, another woman tearing down women. One of the worst movies ever made.

Not worth your time watching. Mandy, so I'm assuming a woman. This is why we shouldn't do sequels. True. Ranko says, Pathetic attempt of copying White Lotus. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah, that's one of thousands.

Those are some of thousands. Some of thousands. Yeah. So maybe give that one a miss. Maybe give it a miss. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. You may remember a couple of years ago when

Brooklyn Beckham married Nicola Peltz and there was drama because she decided to wear a wedding dress designed by someone else and not Victoria Beckham. And everyone was like, this is unacceptable. Rude. This is rude.

This is, this is saying something. And then they came out and they was like, this is unacceptable. Rude. This is rude. This is saying something. And then they came out and they were like, no, we get on like a house on fire. More drama now. Because David Beckham turned 50 last week. Moment of applause. God, he looks good.

Yeah, you'd be stoked if you looked like that at 50. Oh my God. You're going to look like that when you're 50. Yeah, you will actually. Well, thanks guys. Yeah, you will. Thanks. Yeah, not'd be stoked if you looked like that at 50. Oh, my God. You're going to look like that when you're 50. Yeah, you will, actually. Well, thanks, guys. Yeah, you will. Thanks. Yeah, not for me. And you guys.

Don't start getting the... Because he got a bit of... Do you think he's had plastic surgery? He had something a little while ago. I think he laid off it because it freaked everybody out. And now he looks like David Beckham again. Yeah, yeah, right. But I feel like he was getting something done.

Yeah, because people just go too far. You know who's gone way too far? Simon Cowell. Oh, my God. He looks like you could lance him like a boil. Yeah. Honestly. Yeah, he has gone a bit.

Dude, just don't worry about it, man. I know. And the bloody neon teeth. Yeah. They're so white. They're almost blue. Yeah, too much. No, David Beckham's done it just nice if he's had some work done.

Anyway, so he turned 50 and Brooklyn and his wife, Nicola, were not in attendance at the party, even though they were in the UK at the time. And everyone was like, what's happened? It's a feud. There's fighting happening here. And Victoria made a post of the whole family being like, the family's together to celebrate.

Oh, what's she? She's a bit rough, eh? Yeah. No, no, but she's kind of gone posh. I can't do it. Anyway, she's like... Well, she is posh, Spice. Yeah, okay, so she's posh.

Okay, so she's like, the whole family came together to celebrate my David. And he was like, oh, yeah, love, oh, thank you very much for the post. Thanks for coming, everyone. Yeah, thank you very much. But no mention of the fact that Brooklyn and Nicola weren't in attendance.

Now, obviously. It sounds like the entire family hate his wife. It sounds like. I think they just have a sit down and a bit of a corero. You think a little corero will fix this out? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I don't, they keep coming out being like, no, there's no feud or anything. But they are definitely like separating themselves.

We're quite a tight-knit little family. Yeah. Yeah. So no confirmation of the feud, but I like to pour gasoline when I see just a small spark of something, a family feud of types. Right. Well, I, yeah, hmm, well, ha, hmm, ha. Don't pretend like you care.

It's not easy as a family. You don't care about the Beckhams drama? Not really. Nah. But I don't like to see a family unnecessarily going through it. It's good to know, though, that even a rich and famous family still don't like their in-laws or have some family drama. So is what you're saying here, Fletch, money doesn't buy happiness?

Because that would disappoint me. Maybe, yeah. If I won, what is it, $12 million? Is that what Lotto's up to? Yeah. I think we'll do little gifts, eh? I think I'd be significantly happier. I can't help but feel like I'd be a bit happier.

Because even if I started fighting with my brother, I'd be like, well, all goods. I've got $12 million and you don't. Ha-ha. Suck it, Sam. Yeah. See, I'd say that even if I wasn't fighting with my brother. Ha-ha, I've got $12 million.

Suck it. Do you want some? And I'd say, do you want some? And he'd be like, nope. I'd be like even if I wasn't fighting with my brother. Ha-ha, I've got $12 million. Suck it. Do you want some? I'd say, do you want some? And he'd be like, nope. All right, you sure you don't want some? Just like you're 15 again. Yeah, yeah, but you do. Come on, you want some of my $12 million.

Nope, I don't want it. Keep it. I don't need it. That'd be good fun. That'd be the best part about winning a lotto. You're an easy person. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. From the Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. From the Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley group chat,

this is the Top Six. Well, Brad Pitt spotted at Cumie McDonald's, although technically he'll apply because it's over the river. It's across the river. It's across the river. That's the border. So close to both of your houses. I know.

And so he's filming, because he's been in Queenstown filming that movie, where he plays an ex-soldier. Yes, with a service dog? Yeah. So it's a, you know, man and dog story. Right. And I think they must be doing the set pieces

at the QMU film studio. Film studio. That's where they did like Lord of the Rings, the first TV series. It's always doing something there. And you can tell if it's something good because they put a big fence up to stop nosy parkers like me driving past. That's right. So Brad Pitt must have been, I don't know, between scenes or finished for the day

and he's like, you know what I feel like? Some nonnies. Some nonce. I get it, man. Just because he's a fancy rich man, at the end of a long day, you're telling me you don't want some nugs? How old is he now? 60? 60?

60. 60 something? 61 years old. 61. Insane, eh? I mean, we said you'd be stoked if you looked like David Beckham at 50, but if you look like Brad Pitt at 61, let's not set unrealistic expectations. And he's also had a bit of a facelift.

Has he? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, one obvious one. That's fine. Imagine if he's on his way to work now at the film and he's just listening. Oh my God. And he hears you say, oh, he's had some work.

Well, I've had work. It's fine. Don't worry about it. You're beautiful. You're so attractive. Yeah. So just from Huapai, heading back towards town, there's a turn off. If you turn there and you keep driving for a bit, you're going to pass some shops, you're going to pass like some shops, you're going to pass a school,

turn and turn right and that's my house. Okay, right. Beautiful house, freshly renovated. Pop by. What, do you think you'd come from a spa in a cask wine? Might come from a spa in a cask.

Yeah. Lovely. It's ready. I mean, I don't even think you'd need to explain that to Aaron. He gets home and you're in the spa with Brad Pitt.

I mean, no further questions you're on. I think if you walked into your back yard and you saw your partner in a hot tub with a Hollywood celebrity, you're on. I think if you walked into your back yard and you saw your partner in a hot tub with a Hollywood celebrity, you'd just turn around and be like, Fair enough. Yeah, have at.

Fair enough. Get it, girl, I hope Aaron would say, and then you'd leave. Yeah, fair enough. Text me when you're done. Yeah. And then, you know, if it's someone who's not an A-list Hollywood star, but you're sleeping with someone who was on Shortland Street once, be like, but they said on the radio the Hollywood rule.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This person was an extra on Shortland Street once be like but they said on the radio the Hollywood rule. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This person was an extra on Shortland Street. They're like no that's what we call an affair. No, now you're just cheating on me. on the radio

said that it's a Hollywood pass. Yeah, yeah. Alright, this is the video. Have you got my volume? Say hello to my dad. No. Oh, you can't.

Sorry. I'm sorry. Hi, Dad. Alright, moving on. Happy Easter. Thank you. Happy Easter. Almost there. Is this video late? Or does he not know what day it is? Dad. All right, moving on. Happy Easter. Thank you. Happy Easter. Almost.

Is this video late? Or does he not know what day it is? I don't know, man. He might be a bit international timeline. Well, this hit the news on a couple of weeks. Just over the weekend. I've got the top six things. Let's get on with this.

Top six things Brad Pitt orders at McDonald's. Number six on the list, he'd get a pack of nuggets. But not six nuggets or ten nuggets. He'd get Ocean's Eleven nuggets. Number five, I'm not... I hated that. If you're not having fun, I'll move on. I hated that.

No response. Number five on the list of the... If you hated that, you are really going to hate the entire list. To be honest, it's going to get a lot worse. Number five on the list of the top six things Brad Pitt orders from McDonald's. He orders a burger, but has it on a curious case of Benjamin steamed bun tin. I hated that as well. That's so bad.

The whole top six is going to be like this. Oh, no. Number four on the list of the top six things Brad Pitt orders at McDonald's. Meet Joe Black McCafe coffee. Okay. Yeah. Number three on the list. Messy.

Number three on the list. Yeah, dude. Real messy. Number three on the list of the's messy, man. Number three on the list. Yeah, dude. Real messy. Number three on the list of the top six things Brad Pitt orders at McDonald's. He's back for more nuggets. But this time he doesn't know how many are in the box. Spoiler, it's seven. What's in the box?

What's in the box? That's the best one yet. Yeah, that's okay. Yeah, okay. They're like seven nuggets. Yeah, seven. Because of the movie and the head in the box and stuff. Thank you.

Number two on the list of the top six things Brad Pitt orders at McDonald's are some Once Upon Some Fries in Hollywood. Hey-o. Oh, dear. He even stumbled at the beginning of the delivery. Once Upon Some Fries in Hollywood. Hey-o. It's a mess.

It's an absolute shambles. And number one on the list of the top six things Brad Pitt orders at McDonald's, Mr. and Mrs. Filio Smith. Oh, no. Oh, yuck. Really?

We left that one for position one? But seriously, imagine if you saw... I'm Mr. and Mrs. Filio Smith. But imagine if you saw Brad Pitt at McDonald's and he was a Filio fish guy. Oh, no.

I'd be like, my brother, please, bring that Filio fish, grab me one and come over to my spa pool. There's no. I'd be like, my brother, please, bring that Filet-O-Fish, grab me one and come over to my spa pool. There's just a turn after her, a pipe, turn left. It doesn't matter because, you know,

the Filet-O-Fish is already a soft, sloppy mess. It's not going to matter if it falls in the spa. And then Brad Pitt goes to kiss you and he tastes like Filet-O-Fish. But I'll taste like Filet-O-Fish. So we have a big Filet-O-Fish, fish lips kiss. Cancel it out. Cancel it out.

Yeah. Fish lips to fish lips. I beg your pardon? You heard me. Me and Brady. I wish I hadn't, but I did. I heard you all right. Old fish lips.

I can't unhear that. I can't unhear that. Filet-O-Fish lips. That's my new nickname. Old Filet-O-Fish lips. That's what we're going to put on your leavers jersey. Filio Fish Lips. Oh, yeah, if we do one of those jerseys,

I'm right on. Filio Fish Lips. I love that. That is today's self-sex. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. You would have seen Pamela Anderson at the Met Gala, and she had a little bob with a very short fringe.

Now, in my day, we bob with a very short fringe. Now in my day we called it a minge fringe. I remember it being called a minge fringe. Do you remember it being called a minge fringe? Why did we call it that? I don't know.

Because it was short? I don't know. Because it was wispy? And light like pubes? Yeah, light like pubes? I don't know. Weird. But the short little fringe

and then like it was kind of like a Dedevante's kind of like a gothy thing for a while. I'm going to show you a photo guys just for you to look at when I had a fringe. Oh no see I wouldn't call that a minge fringe. That's not minge fringe. That was

covering the eyes. Isn't that so bad? Isn't that so bad? I think that needs to go on our socials. You look like that. With the hashtag Minj Fringe. Yeah, no, that's not Minj Fringe. Oh, okay. I've got an egg head and it's so bad. It's so bad.

You know who you look like in that reference? You know in the Muppets, there's the band and the blonde Muppets. Hair covers their eyes. That's who you look like. That's sort of who I look like. Well, I'll send it to the group chat. Do with it what you will. But I can't do a fringe.

I don't have the right shape face. Now the trending fringe is the Jane Austen bangs. Now, if you think about Jane Austen, you think about like Emma Thompson and Keira Knightley and Pride and Prejudice and all that kind of stuff, Sense and Sensibility. It's the wispy, short, mingish, fringish, but more of a wisp and a curl to it.

Don't do it. You know, Keira Knightley had it in Pride and Prejudice. It's, yeah, look, it's not. Oh, no. It's a bit. What the sister in Fleabag? Was that with the fringe? Oh, my God.

I look like a pencil. That was so brilliant. It's European. I love it. Oh, you would have seen Ariana Grande's been rocking this recently. Right. Yeah, but we shouldn't see

someone in Hollywood do something and then be like, that would look great on me. Taylor Swift's got a Jane Austen fringe. She's sort of got curly-ish sort of vibe. Okay, well, I mean, you've got to have a certain kind of

head shape to pull it off too, don't you? So you're agreeing that my egg head doesn't do the fringe. I didn't say you were the one that said you had an egg head. I do have an egg head and particularly when I was younger, my cheeks were a bit chubbier.

Yeah, the egg head fringe. Could you use AI to see what you'd look like with different haircuts? Yeah, 100%. You could upload a photo of yourself, give me this haircut. There's apps and websites that do that as well. Because there are those like people are using AI to see what their lounge would look like with different furniture and colours and stuff.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So surely you could, maybe you could use the furniture app or the furniture app. Just put a picture of you and be like, what would I look like with the curtains? With a short pair of curtains. With a curtain. On my head, over my face. I don't know. I'm sure AI could do it, for sure.

What would I look like with a curtains? And at least then, if you're doing it in the privacy of your own home with AI, you can confront it first. Yeah, you can be like, okay, I look all right, or I look ghastly. Yeah, because once you cut a fringe, you are really committing for a long time to growing that out.

Yeah. You know? And it's going to get worse before it gets better. The moment you can tuck it behind your ears, that's fine. But that's going to take a hot minute. And I can't do it. Yeah. Now, one of those clips,

you do that thing where you pin it back for a little while until it gets behind the ears. Yeah, but everyone knows what you're doing. Yeah, I know. Everyone's like, you look terrible. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I don't have a hinge profile, but I would put a lot of effort into it if I had one.

Oh, man, it would be the creme de la creme of my personality and none of the shit bits. Okay. Wait, so you'd hide the bad bits from potential? For as long as possible. Yeah, like 10, 12 years if possible. 10 to 14 years. And then I'd release them all. And they'd be like, 10, 12 years if possible. Yeah, 10 to 14 years. And then I'd release them all.

And they'd be like, oh, you're a tornado. You're a psycho. Right, you lied. Yeah. You kind of gaslit our entire relationship. I'm like, now you're stuck with me. Anyway, there was a dating expert who has given a hinge profile checklist. There's a lot of people struggling to to get cut through, you know?

Get the likes that they need to find the one. Yep. The one and only. Love is dead. Now, show different sides of yourself on your profile is the first tip. Okay. So rather than just saying like a few short pictures of you just sort of standing around doing things,

have you doing something adventurous? Have you doing something cute? Have you around doing things. Have you doing something adventurous? Have you doing something cute? Have you doing something fun? Have you doing something silly? Something a bit kind of. What about something practical? Yes. Yes.

You could take a photo pretending to do charity. Pretend to do charity. Or just do charity and get a photo. Or just whatever. Or just do charity and not get a photo. It might just be easy to pretend to do charity. Wait, so people are doing charity and not getting photos of it and sharing it. Yeah.

Wild. Crazy. So just for the good of helping other people that aren't themselves. I could just imagine like going, if you were at a charity and just like people turning up and just doing a whole photo shoots. Yeah. One hundred percent full glam. Kind of not the point of it, hon.

Yeah. So can I get a photo of you handing the soup to this man? Sorry, what's your name? Can you turn towards the camera? Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. See, a photo like that would be great on a profile. Actually, you know what? You and I look a little bit alike. I'm going to need some diversity

in this charity picture. Yeah, is there a way we can get like a dirtier man? Is there a way just so we can really tell? You know? Yeah. Okay, so show a bit of variety. Second tip, balance humour and vulnerability. Because a lot of people go straight for jokes and then you don't actually get to see anything of who they are.

Do they want a video of me crying? With the homeless people that you're helping in your charity. And it makes it look like I'm crying because I'm so overwhelmed and I'm crying because one touched me. Hey guys, yeah, I'm just leaving and I've been doing charity all day and it's just really like reminded me how lucky I am. But yeah, really one of them fingered your foot. And cut.

Yeah. And you hear just at the end, and cut. Yeah. But like put something about yourself, like your family or something like that, something you actually really care about. Yeah. Use a clear solo shot for your first photo.

Oh my God, people that still have like, them with their arm around a chick and then they've put like an emoji over her face. You're like, I know you look good in this photo, dude. Yeah. But I reckon get a fresh clear shot. But also, who is she? And get out of my way. What's the story?

Yeah. Is there drama? Is there a suitcase full of luggage? Baggage. Have a variety of photos as well. So not just selfies, not just like professional shots Like something Just like a mixture Fun

Variety And use prompts That are easy to respond to So have something in your profile That people When they first go to message you Can instantly respond to Right

Oh okay You know Like if you're into gardening And carrots I tell you what You and I Are gonna get on Like a house on fire

And then they're gonna slip in And be like I love carrots Carrots Shredded you what, you and I are going to get on like a house on fire. And then they're going to slip in and be like, carrots. I love carrots. Shredded or cubed. And off we go. Who's shredding carrots? I would have said whole.

I shred carrots all the time. What's that thing they do where they get a real thin thing of carrots? How do they do that? It's a peeler. What? Well, you can get a peeler, but chefs do it by hand. Well, they do it with a knife. By hand.

Yeah, with a very sharp knife. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you can't get a julienne peeler, but chefs do it by hand. Well, they do it with a knife. By hand. Yeah, with a very sharp knife. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you can get a Julianne peeler. Right, okay. Posh. I know. Well, those are your hinge profile checklist ticks. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley.

We were down in Wellington. Well, I was down in Wellington most of last week doing my show. Thank you to everyone who attended. But Fletch came down just as a little bit of moral support. I sometimes get a bit lonely on tour when I'm on my own, and Fletch said, hey, hey. Happy to help. Happy to come down and help.

Is that the only reason? Well, he did see the show. He stabbed you with his pencil right through your neck. Whoa, whoa, why is he getting aggressive? I just asked a question if that was the only reason you went to Wellington, and you immediately reached for a weapon? Yeah. Wow.

I mean, just so I haven't had a lot of. I mean, just like having had a lot of sleep. Yeah, he hasn't had a lot of sleep at all. I had a delicious eight hours last night. It was delicious. Well, we did kind of have a bit of a fun big night on Saturday, which was really great. But I woke up on Saturday and I've been sick. I've been quite unwell with a cold.

And Fletch, and I was like, I'm going to spend most of the early morning in bed and then I'll meet Fletch for some lunch. And he was like, get your ass out of that bed. And he said, we're going to go for a walk. It'll be good. Blow out some lemon. Yeah, we're going to go up Mount Vic.

I said, we're going to walk up Mount Vic. It's a beautiful day. It was. And it was one of those, say it. You can't beat Wellington on a good day. You can't beat Wellington on a good day. Yeah, something like that. I don't know how it goes. My headphones are cutting in and out.

You can't beat Wellington on a good day. Damn it. She got it. She got it. She got it through. Honestly, though. It was beautiful. This guy couldn't stop.

We couldn't walk straight without him stopping. A film we went to. What's the bay? O Bay? The parade. We went to the parade. What's the name of the parade? I'm somewhat reluctant to use an outdated race-based term.

You said, no, you told me on the weekend it was called, this is Hayley's words, Oriental Parade. Oh, Hayley. I didn't name it. Hayley. I didn't. You can't call it that anymore. No, we just say Obey. We just say Obey. Obey, or Om the Parade. Or the Chinese Communist Party parade.

Something like that. Either of those are acceptable now. Yeah. Well, we went for a hike to absolutely blow out the germs, and man, the snot rockets we left. Oh, you're giving them the old hoot-hoot? It's really steep. It's really steep, the walk up from the parade up to Mount Vakit.

Yeah, man. Many steps. Oh, yes. So there were a few snot rockets. There were some snot rockets hurtling through. In fact, you could have worked out our path based on the snot rockets that we were sort of blowing left, right.

Sniffle dog could have followed you. But we were also on our own. People were snoozing, man. We were up that monger. It was great. Got to the top, got a view. And then I just, for the sake of these, did stop.

He was a tourist, though. He was like Australian or American or something. I said, excuse me, sir. I don't suppose I could trouble you to take a photo of me and my partner. Lovely. You know what I mean? I was like, oh, God. Well, I didn't, you know, I just thought it was just easy to explain.

I always, if I see people doing like a selfie, say, would you like me to take a photo? I always offer. Yeah, you're going to get a way better photo. Yeah, totally. Yeah. So we would, it was just too beautiful not to get one. So we had some photos. People put it up and people were like, beautiful couple.

Cute couple. Oh, gorgeous couple. Well, no, I did get a couple of messages, are you sibling or dating? Right. Siblings or dating? The answer is neither. Closer to siblings than dating.

Yeah, yeah. Sort of the modern day JJ and Dom. Yeah. Can't wait to see how it all pans out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Great. Oh, you know I love my scandals. Yeah, you do.

He loves his running. Yeah, but we did look like a couple going for a walk. Yeah, we really did. It was a bit weird. Because everyone else, there was some tourists, but mostly couples. Yeah, for sure. And we just looked like couples.

Yeah, we did look like couples. Before the rumours start, we just want to say... Not couples. Yuck. Ooh, ooh, ooh, yuck. Yuck. At one point, After my show on Saturday I re-met up with Fletch

Because he didn't come and see the show Just in terms of the support No because I'm going on Friday with everybody He wants to let it simmer a bit Slow clock Yeah yeah yeah Look she's going to iron out a few kinks Yeah you're going to iron out a few kinks

Do you iron out any kinks at the weekend Fletch? Just on that No No kinky sort of stuff Why are you reaching for water? to be honest yeah you gotta iron out a few kinks do you iron out any kinks at the weekend Flitch just on that no no kinky sort of stuff no kinkies I would stab you with this pencil why are you reaching

for a war weapon no kinkies dude relax I would stab you with this pencil I'm just wondering what you were doing when she was doing

the comedy I think he was just down there trying to catch up on some sleep because we'd be hanging out and then he was like I'm just going to pop back to the hotel for a bit

I would stab you with this pencil next. Just catching up on your Zs. Catching up on your Zs. Yeah. And I had work to do. Anyway, just want to put it out there. If you did see us looking like a couple at the weekend.

And then you did see Fletch coming up to my hotel room and coming in there. He sat on the cock chair. Yeah. While I just quickly dropped off a few things. Nothing happened. I hate how messy Hayley's hotel room was. I'm a bit of a bombsite. It's a bombsite.

Different when I'm there with the family and the kids and stuff. But if it's just me, it's just everywhere, man. It's everywhere. Everything goes on the floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everything was on the floor. What is it about being in a hotel room? You just get so feral.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Real feral. You're just surviving, man. Yeah. It's like there's that fold-out thing that looks weird and you're supposed to sit your suitcase on it. And you start with the best of intentions and then it's just like...

Can I say one funny thing, though, is during my show, and this isn't really a spoiler, during my show I tell the story about when I airdropped that nude in the cafe and I airdrop it to one member of the audience. And on Saturday night, bad news, Brad got it. I mean, he's too good in his soul to receive a nude of Hayley Sprouse.

But you know it's safe. Wait, so you actually send a nude of yourself to an audience member? Yep. It is wild, Hayley Sprouse. It's a good show. I look forward to doing it for you, Auckland. I'm not turning on my eardrop this Friday night. Absolutely not. Next on the show,

if you identify as the loser's sibling, which I hope no one in this thing does. No, you know who you are. Vaughan, you do, because your brother's a pharmacist and way more successful. Yeah, Aaron's father... And my sister's a business owner.

Aaron's brother is a child doctor. Saves babies' lives. Really? Yeah. A paediatrician. I was scared I was going to say a paediatrist, and so I just said child doctor. Well, what about A paediatrician? I was scared I was going to say a podiatrist. That's the foot one. Well, what about a paediatrician podiatrist specialises in children's feet?

Yeah, maybe. Who's also a pedometer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Loser siblings. I never really thought about it, but apparently a lot of people

grow up in a family thinking they're the loser sibling yeah i can understand that if you had a very successful sibling but it's even before they're successful it's even in childhood if your siblings maybe there's a real sporty sibling oh like your brother was all the attention for the sport yeah like your brother was a really good and they were in the first 15 you were in like the fourth 15 or you were in like the fourth 15 or the eighth 15. Well, you didn't even play sport because it wasn't your vibe

and you might have a really academic sibling and you're not that one either and so someone will say something maybe as a joke and then it kind of sticks in your own head as it often does

and 15 years later you can't stop thinking about it and they completely forgot they ever said anything in the first place. to see a therapist to talk about being such a loser. I was a loser sibling.

It's lovely, but it could have all been avoided. So instilling that in the brain early leads to some very negative traits developed by the person who considers themselves a loser sibling. Right. Low self-esteem. They try to be people pleasers. They internalize shame a lot more. And they'll think if something goes wrong in the family, they're either going to get the blame or they blame themselves for it.

They overcompensate using humour, likeability or achievement to mask insecurity. Man, that's definitely not the case of anybody in this room. Avoiding competition, self-sabotaging. How much fun is a self-sabotage though? I must say, I like when somebody's going well and I'm like, hmm, I could ruin this for myself. I might.

And chronic social comparison. Always comparing yourself to other people. Because that's a bit grim, isn't it? Yeah. I know, but imagine being Lisa Carrington's sister. Do you know what I mean? Tina Carrington. Yeah, Tina.

Becky Carrington. And she's probably an absolutely fine person. And you can't even say in the canoe. You keep falling out. You're tipping over. You're escalating. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or your Richie McCall's brother. And you can't even say in the canoe. You keep falling out. Oh, the fun. You get in the canoe, you're tipping over. You're escalating. Exactly. Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or you're Richie McCaw's brother. Stevie McCaw. Stevie McCaw. This is the weird thing about the McCaw children. All of them have names that can be shortened to N and an E sound. Yeah. Richie, Stevie, Maxie.

I mean, I don't know if any of these Kiwi sports people even have siblings or I don't know. We don't know. That's terrible. We should get to know the siblings. Or what if like your sibling, and you can see it objectively, is really good looking. And you know that you're a minger. And you're just a minger. You're a minger.

And you've got the minger genes. You've got the minger genes. No one knows how it happened. You know what? I reckon we can not only talk to some people who consider themselves the loser siblings. Well, why don't we just talk to you? Because your brother's a pharmacist

and your sister's a business owner, all doing very well for themselves. Yeah, and I've got ornamental animals. So we're all doing stuff. We're all doing stuff. Don't worry, at the weekend when we went down to Taranaki, I certainly heard from actual

farmers that it's silly to just have animals that serve no purpose apart from the ornamental. Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. You're bleeding yourself dry just for some cuteness? You're bleeding yourself dry just for some Instagram photos? Yeah, hello goats, just to do that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Silly.

I know, ridiculous. That's wild, pointless. It's got me considering my entire personality. Do you think people are going to admit to being the loser sibling? Somebody said, I'm already feeling very called out. Lovely for a Monday morning. Thanks, guys. Oh, see, I don't want people to.

When it's boosted up, you tell us. I don't want people to feel bad, but it is kind of funny, isn't it? Yeah. No. Yeah. Yes. But no. But a little bit.

As long as you can look at it in a humorous way. Yeah, as long as, yeah. Someone messaged in saying that their cousins are loser siblings. One's a high-ranking officer in the army and one's in prison. Oh, yeah. For 23 years. So that's... That's a big prison stint.

But you've really nailed that favourite son, though, eh? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's definitely a prison guy. Not the prison guy, is it? Oh my God, imagine if it was a prison guy and you were the loser sibling. You're the loser sibling and your brother's in prison.

Somebody had just worked out we're saying loser, not looser. And they were like, I was definitely going to ring in and nominate my sister. For being loose. Oh, rude. Okay, well, let's see.

Loser. I mean, obviously it's tongue in cheek. Oh, of course. 0800 DALS at M. We'd love to hear from you this morning. Call us. You can text through 9696. Are you the loser sibling?

Psychologists looked into how identifying yourself or being identified as the loser sibling affects you later in life. It's not a good thing. We should all... Yeah. So what was the tip that you just don't think about it? How to overcome it.

Acknowledge the role you've taken within a dysfunctional family system. Seek external validation through therapy, support groups, or trusted friends to reframe your experiences. Redefine success based on your personal values, not your family's expectations. Build new environments to affirm your worth and align your goals. Set boundaries with family members, especially if they resist your growth,

and recognize your agency as an adult to value your own skills and rewrite your narrative. That's pretty good stuff. Yeah, it's pretty good. That's just some good tips. Okay, so messages in. Are you the loser, sibling?

Hang on a second. Yeah, back to the self-destructive stuff. Let's hear from our losers. Someone said, my brother is an aeroplane pilot and I'm a marine biologist and business owner. I think we're awesome,

but you can tell us who's the loser. I don't think either of you are losers. That sounds like a successful family and your parents should be very proud of the efforts they've put in coming to fruition. marine biologist and business owner. I think we're awesome, but you can tell us who's the loser. I don't think any of you are losers. That sounds like a successful family and your parents should be very proud of the efforts they've put in coming to fruition. I'm so nice and neutral. I need to know more.

Yeah. You know? But then you could go to this one. I've got multiple degrees, a high-powered job, dealing with a lot of money every day, but in my mum's eyes, my bartending brother

who keeps losing his job because he doesn't turn up, and my drug-addicted sister who keeps popping out kids are apparently the best in the world, and I'm the loser. I don't know if she thinks that, does she? She might just think deeper in there, my bro. They need more support.

Yes. They need more of mum because you've learned to function without mum. Yep. And you might be thinking, she's favouring them, but she probably, she's their training wheels, by the sounds of it, they might need the extra support. But isn't that amazing you can be so successful, but then you're so hard on yourself by thinking that as well. Interesting.

I'm a minga sibling. I don't know if you're talking about the ugly ones as well. Well, no, we didn't say, are you the minga sibling? No, but if that, you know. My mum refers to my sister and one of my brothers as the good-looking children. Oh, mum, stop doing that. That's rough, eh? That sounds like Mum's got a good sense of humour, though.

Far out. Keep you grounded. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's Mum's job, really, not that you get too far ahead of yourself. Yeah. What about the only children? Won't someone think of the only children?

The only children, you've just had both parents concentrating on you your whole life. Yeah, you're a brat. Yeah, you're a brat. You don't. Yeah, you're a brat. Yeah, you're a brat. You don't like sharing. You're a brat. Yeah. Okay.

Only children don't like to hear that, Vaughn. Only children, well, you know what? It's about time they heard something they didn't like. Rather than, yes, I can take you to McDonald's whenever you want because we've only got one child and we've got more disposable income. Yep. Get, get, get. Get, get, get.

One, one, one. Take, take, take. Okay. Only children. I mean, I come from a family of three. I'm not like Catholic eight. Because you're like the attention-seeking middle child. How different would you be if you were an only child, do you reckon?

I'd be a menace. I think a menace to society. I'd be a real menace. Yeah. A real Dennis the Menace. Yeah. It'd be this times ten, I think. It'd be like, imagine me but Hayley.

Far out. That's a lot. That'd be too much. That's two people who are already a bit much. A lot of messages coming in. We'll get to more of those next. Are you the loser sibling? We're talking about the repercussions,

the lifelong sort of like hangovers of considering yourself the loser sibling and how you shouldn't because you're... Yeah, you shouldn't. But we are tongue in cheek asking, are you the loser sibling and how you shouldn't because you're yeah you shouldn't but we are tongue-in-cheek asking are you the loser sibling this one yeah uh both my sisters um got wide hips and a fat ass and me and my younger sister got my dad's flat ass so i'd say i'm losing i'm losing on that one yeah you are all about that bass all about and that treble good try good try not the treble um i'm the loser of my family of esteemed teachers.

I dropped the ball and didn't even get a degree at all. My grandmother with dementia who struggles through me for most things still remembers to roast me about it whenever I see her. God, grands never forget. They just roast you non-stop, don't they? It makes you stronger. Always felt like the loser's sibling.

It wasn't because of anything that happened at home. I had a teacher tell me I'd never be as smart as my sister. She was a pleasure to teach. Ooh. Probably shouldn't be doing that, I don't think. Yeah, no, I don't think. I remember we did that as a phone-in topic one day. Like, what do you always remember a teacher saying to you?

Oh, yeah, it's brutal. And the things, like, people remember were ruthless. It's always the negative stuff. That's the human experience, though, right? Yeah. A hundred nice things, and then someone says one bad thing, and that's all you can fixate on. It's like that one person

that said that one bad thing about your comedy show at the weekend. Who said that? Who said a bad thing about that? I actually... Who messaged you? I rung the hotel you guys were staying at and said if you could just pull out pages,

those pages. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought one small review would have been enough, but they took like multiple pages out. Whoa. Explain it. I'd just, I'd ignore them though. Yeah.

Like everyone was saying such lovely things. It's just that one bad thing. Yeah. Yeah. And then what would the people who organized the Comedy Fest know anyway? That's what I was like. It was weird of them to turn on you. Wow.

You do so much for them. Oh God. Yeah, that's, um, uh turn on you. Wow. You do so much for them. Oh, God. Yeah, that's... My twin sister moved to Wellington and worked for the government. I stayed at home with my parents and bawled my eyes out to my mum on the phone that I wasn't making any friends at uni. Hey. Oh.

That doesn't mean you're the loser sibling. It's just hard. It's hard to make friends. And it's hard to work for the government because they're just slashing jobs left, right and centre. So maybe your sister's going to have to move home too and then you can both cry together.

We've got some Instagram responses on people. My sister is currently travelling around the US having a hell of a time putting up amazing photos and having a great experience and I just burnt my mouth,

burnt the roof of my mouth on the mac and cheese that I didn't blow on enough. So they're the loser sibling. Yeah. But you can't compare yourself to people on Instagram with all their lovely photos and lives.

Oh, that's not real life. You don't know what's happening. One sibling's a surgeon, one's a nurse, one's a paramedic, one's a support worker, and then there's little old me. But they don't say what they do. I mean, those are pretty, like, respectable, giving jobs. I know, like, they're all, like, saving and helping lives. Jogs, right, aren't all

middle children losers? Speaking of half of all the middle children, no. Looking at the data in the room. Sample size in the room. You'd say yes, wouldn't you? Yeah. One of my brothers, Henry said, one of my brothers is a physicist working for NASA. Oh, what? That's not fair.

A physicist working for NASA. Like, what do you... You could literally be a heart surgeon and you're still the loser. The other is a criminal lawyer. Oh, my God. And I'm a chippy. Now, I will not have a chippy talking down on themselves

unless they're one of the ones that turns up for five minutes at about nine o'clock in the morning and their scarf is off. Definitely go to another job, but just so they're going down the road to get a few more things. Yeah, and definitely going to charge up a few things on your bill for another project,

but don't worry about it because they're not going to check it, are they? Because the other job they're doing is a cash job and they've got to buy some stuff, so they're just going to chuck it on your bill and take it to the cash job, but you're not going to notice because it's such a massive thing. But also, whatever job they're doing, they'll be the ones to call you when they need something built or fixed or renovated. Yeah, exactly.

Oh my God, yeah, don't say just a chippy. No way. We all wish we got into the trades, to be honest. Yeah, trades would have been a nice lifelong investment in oneself. You wouldn't have liked the bad reviews though if you did a bad renovation. Just one bad review and I wouldn't have just taken my time. The wall was uneven.

I'm on builder's crack. I'm on builder's crack every day. Checking me reviews. Young assist is a senior level tech manager. I was a single parent doing admin roles but I've just crack every day, checking me reviews. Young Assist is a senior level tech manager. I was a single parent doing admin roles, but I've just finished my law degree last year, so who's the loser sibling now?

Well, I mean, it's not a competition. If you're a single parent, that's got to be like one of the hardest gigs out there. Yeah. Totally. Don't you worry about that. My mum has her PhD and is a pilot. Wow. What?

And my auntie and uncle are unemployed alcoholics. Hey. Yeah, but who's got all the free time on their hands? Yeah, who's more fun to hang out with? That's all I'm going to say. Who's got a flag and a sherry in the pantry? Oh, I have a flag and a sherry. Yeah, yeah, cookie sherry.

Babe, that was the natural out. My brother's at you. You missed the natural out there, Fletch. Yeah. I went cookie sherry. That would have been the natural out. No, but you look like you're about to read some more out. My brother's an almost 100 test all black

and I play Minecraft. What? Okay, who is that? Who's your brother? We need to know who that is. Who's that? We'll all know

the name of this person. Oh, you've played 100 tests for the all blacks. 100%. But also, how good is your Minecraft village? Because I'm not that

taken by an all blacks game. I love the haka. Don't get me wrong. Yeah? Yeah. But then I've been watching these Minecraft videos with my kids

and I'm like who made this genius see if I'd taken his natural out and your natural out we wouldn't have heard about that

amazing story about the All Blacks I'm just saying rhythmically play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley do you know last week I got

the Stetson cowboy hat you guys saw it yeah saw what happened when I put that on it was a free promotional hat yeah

a Stetson hat. Like, if you know your hat, Stetson's right up there. I mean, you've got a farm lid, but it's a bit much for the city. You think it's a bit much for the city? Oh, I don't know. I'm so into it. Yeah, I really liked it. Well, I at the weekend went down to Taranaki, the family,

the farm that's been in the family for like five generations, I think. God, the amount of apartments you can put on that land. The amount of townhouses we can cram on there. It's in the middle of nowhere, Hayley. It's in the middle of nowhere. You know, urban sprawl. But thinking about the future.

Thinking about the future, man. When the urban sprawl hits Pahama in the South Taranaki region, you know, it might be Stratford that pushes in there. Who knows? Make it bang. But anyway, it's been sold. So we went down, I took mum down, kind of a Mother's Day thing as well, caught up with some family

I haven't seen in ages. It was good. And it was, when I said last week we were off to, by the way, I saw the Monga top to bottom. Oh, it's beautiful.

Thank you for the photos. Hilt to tip. Hilt to tip yesterday. I've never seen more of Mount Taranaki than I did yesterday. Don't be stupid. You've been on it.

We've been hiking and you've seen all of it. Oh, no, no, no, I know, but even when we were on it, it wasn't as clear as that. Yeah, true. Not a cloud. Yeah, beautiful. You've been on it. We've been hiking and you've seen all of it. Oh, no, no, no, I know, but even when we were on it, it wasn't as clear as that. Yeah, true. Not a cloud. Yeah, beautiful. Not a blemish. Now, when it was, I said I was going down there last week, I heard from Sarah

who said, bring the hat. I've got the horse. Right. Some sort of, I mean, if I said to someone, hey, nice hat, look good. Bring the hat. When you're coming down, bring the hat. Bring the hat. I've got the horse. Yeah. Let's have a photo shoot. Oh, right. Let's have a photo shoot. Oh, right. Let's have a photo shoot. Now, look,

this is why I think it's fraud. You're not a horse rider. No, I'm not a horse rider. Or a cowboy. Or a cowboy. So you'll take this would be like me getting a fireman's uniform and standing You did that last year when we were in Napier

at the launch of the journey to Drench. Yeah, but that was different. We were at the fire truck. I had a similar response to both images. This would be like me putting on a fireman's uniform and just taking a photo shoot outside a burning down school. Yeah. You know, and then putting it online and everyone would be like,

oh, my God, what a fireman. Well, you don't have time for a photo shoot. You should be putting up that burning school. Me dressing like a doctor with a st't have time for a photo shoot. You should be putting up that birdie school. Or like me dressing like a doctor with a stethoscope and having a photo shoot in a ward. You know, like, that's not me. Yeah, yeah. You don't ride horses.

But I've got this. I know, but he's on board it. And it's honestly the photos. I mean, they're great photos. They're great photos. I just commented, yeah. So, no, that's nice. That's good, eh? Now imagine this situation. I'm in New P, yeah. Now, that's nice. That's good,

eh? Now, imagine this situation. I'm in New Plymouth with my parents, who I had a great time with, by the way. I,

um, had a very good time with them over the weekend and I said, uh, one, we're going to do one thing before we leave.

Yeah. And they're like, what is it? I said, uh, I'm going to go and get some photos on a horse. Now,

I'm 43 years old. I'm 43 years old and I'm like, Dad, can you drive up this road so I can have a photo on a horse, please? Hold on, burn a horse. And's a moment of vanity. I'm 43 years old. I'm 43 years old and I'm like, Dad, can you drive up this road so I can have a photo on a horse, please? I want to burn a horse.

And then my parents came in and I made them take a whole lot of photos and stuff. And it was like I was a little kid again. Yeah. Right, okay.

Yeah. Wow. And sitting on the horse. The photos are on our socials. And I've got to say, massive thank you. Wait, so you didn't know the people with the horse?

No, Sarah messaged me. She said, you've got the hack. I'm going to have a photo on Cash, a massive thank you. Wait, so you didn't know the people with the horse? No, Sarah messaged me. They just offered. You've got the hack. I'm going to have a photo on Cash, the horse. Okay. And Cash was a beautiful big horse. Yes. So the photos are up on our Instagram.

FVHZM. Yep. You can see them. Beautiful light-coloured brown horse. Yeah, beautiful, beautiful horse. And the saddle. The saddle. The saddle's like a handmade situation.

He looked like Jake Gyllenhaal in Brokeback Mountain. Yeah, got to tell you what. Nommie, nommie. Nommie, nommie. Nommie, nommie. Spitty, spitty. I wish I knew how to quit you. But you're not a cowboy and you don't ride horses.

I don't know because the evidence. Sir, this is the visual evidence. Hayley, that's hard. The visual evidence would say you're on that I am a dead cowboy. I mean, that photo looks like you could be modelling the hat for the people. Yeah. Big head. Great photo.

But again, I will say hashtag fraud. I would have taken the Apple Watch off, city boy. Oh, yeah. See, you didn't see the Apple Watch. I didn't notice the Apple Watch was visible. No, that's all right. I'm a modern cowboy. I've got to know my steps. The first comment notice the Apple Watch was visible. No, that's all right. I'm a modern cowboy. I've got to know my steps.

The first comment on the post is somebody asking if this is AI. That's how good it is. That's how good it is. That's how good it looks. Wow. Yep. That's the song in the background. Yeah, okay, right.

You can turn your phone off, please. We're on here. She's entering her cowgirl era. I'm entering my cowboy era. That's so good yeah well you can check out those photos

what you didn't see is I had to use the little plastic round ladder of course you did of course you did because you're a city boy you don't ride horses

I said I'm getting off the horse without the ladder and she's like are you sure and I was like yeah and I dismounted

quite gracefully is that why you've got a sore foot today or a sore ankle I'm all good right well again just fortunately and I dismounted quite gracefully. Is that why you've got a sore foot today or a sore ankle? I'm all good. Right. Well, again, just fortunately... It is a bit of light fraud.

I will say light fraud. But you can check out those... Don't buy into it for a second longer. Absorb it and then just realise. Check out those photos now. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. We fly over the window and the desk to producer Shannon,

who has a tip for a date night for couples. Yeah, how fun's a buffet? Love a buffet. Buffets are great. It's so fun, but I feel like sometimes I don't nail it. Yeah, same. And I go too hard on something and then you realise there's nachos. You get excited and then you have this mash of food on a plate.

Yeah, stir fry. Some of it's Asian. Some of it's curry. Some of it's ham. Roast beef. Some of it's salad. And yeah, you stack up your first plate and then you get real full and you just, yeah. You're stuffed up.

I've got a bit of a tip for a date night, how couples are nailing the buffet. And basically what you do is you alternate between the couple so let's say it's hayley and i and just you know for fun and so like a hard launch yeah crazy yeah does your boyfriend know about this yeah yeah yeah he's well okay yeah um so basically i'll go first, Hayley. Okay. And I'll go up to the buffet, and I need to make us the most gorgeous little entree plate for us to share. Oh, my God.

So I might get some melon and some prosciutto. What? Melon? I hate melon. Melon and prosciutto, though. Prosciutto. I'm making a little starter. A little starter base.

Melon and prosciutto is not a classic. You said it is. You're not an Italian. It's fine dining melon. But this is what I'm doing. I'm making it fine dining. So I'll make it up, look gorgeous. The whole point is you're presenting.

And I'll sit down with my date, Hayley, and I say, ta-da, starter. We will then share this plate. This is between the two of us. That's so gay. This keeps getting gayer. Look at that. We're feeding it to the prosciutto and melon. And then Hayley's off to get our next plate.

Hayley can get whatever she wants, something she's particularly keen for, something she thinks I might not have tried initially. Wait, but this is why we love a buffet, because it's just one for all. All for one. No, but yeah, this is sort of all for one, one for all. The three musketeers, yeah.

You just get into the buffet and you just go crazy. But this is a way to kind of slow down, make sure you try new things. It's a bit more fun for a couple because we're invested now. I'm like, oh, what's Hayley going to get for us? This would have to be for an established couple though. If I went on a first date to a buffet with a woman, I'm hard launching my queerness here.

If I went on a first date with a woman and I didn't know anything about her, I'm nervous woman. I'm hard launching my queerness here. If I went on a first date with a woman and I didn't know anything about her, I'm nervous at the buffet. Is she into this? Is she an Arancini chick? I am thinking it might be a nice way to get to know their culinary. Yeah, but imagine you come back

and you've got oysters and she's like... Or muscles. Or cold muscles. There's always cold muscles. They're a bit chewy to me. They're like I'm cooked or... I'm not doing oysters at the buffet. They're a bit chewy to me. They're a bit chewy. I'm not doing oysters at a buffet either,

unless it's like I've paid a lot. I'm doing oysters at a buffet. I'm not doing oysters at the buffet. I mean, also, this is like a fun thing, but if you didn't like the plate, you could, you know, go get more. It's not like you're limited wasteful. How am I supposed to see wasteful people at a buffet? I'm not saying wasteful.

I'm saying if I bought the prosciutto on melon and Hayley shat all over it like you just did, I can finish my melon. You could go get. I could go get my own. Yeah. Little situation. Just get your own from the start maybe. No, I just think it's a fun tip

and I'm saying this everywhere online and I want to get amongst. Someone said, what the hell? You're at a buffet. Fill your boots. Every man for himself. I know. It does feel like they're saying every man for himself.

Yeah. Not all for one and one for all. One for all. I mean, that does work, I guess. It's literally the opposite of all for one and one for all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's literally the opposite of every man for himself. All for me and just for me.

It does feel like you're not going to get enough out of the buffet, though, if you're sharing every plate. We just get lots of plates. No, because if you eat slowly, the buffet, you'll get full. You've got to eat fast so that your body doesn't know that you're full and you've got your money's worth. What's the opposite of a Zimper? I want that before I go to a buffet.

Stretch the stomach. You just don't know you're full and you've got a ravenous hunger and you inject it. And then in the morning, you just go back to the Aussies. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A Zimper, a Zimper, a Zempik, a Zempik. Can I just collect my sidebar? Oh my God. Of course, I love a sidebar. Oh my God, guys,

guys. Saturday night after my show I see a woman that I see once a year. She's a mother of a friend of mine. Came to the show. She said, you're on a Zempik, aren't you? Oh my God, high praise. You're not on a Zempik. Not on a Zempik. It's nice. I said, Sandra, no, I'm not on a Zempik. She's like, it's gotta beic. Not on Ozempic. It's nice. I said, Sandra, no, I'm not on Ozempic.

She's like, it's got to be. It's got to be. Sandy. It's got to be. It's hard work. It's hard work. I just want to decide that. Nerves eating themselves.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just constant mental breakdowns. Anxiety. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's anxiety. Just pounding at the door. Yeah. No anxiety.

No Ozempic though. No Ozempic. But funny that you took that as a compliment. Most people would be insulted. Sandy, stop it. I'm not on Ozempic though. No Ozempic. But funny that you took that as a compliment. Most people would be insulted. Sandy, stop it. I'm not on Ozempic. Right. Oh, of course.

Someone said, of course, the opposite to Ozempic is smoking weed before you go and you just get the mad green munchies. Oh. No, I've got to be more present in the brain. I've got to be sharp, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've got to be focused. You've got to be sharp in a buffet.

I don't want to be just eating mousse after mousse after mousse. No, because that's the thing. You go in and you'll just get, you'll see the moose and that's it. Then you're lost down a one-way moose highway. Man, I did too much moose. Yeah. Yeah. We should buffet, by the way.

How about some moose, though? If we're going to go some moose. Oh, I'm leaving room for moose. Oh, yeah, at the end. But you don't stay. That's the boring about moose. And jelly, the minute it hits the mouth, it's liquid. It'll fill all the gaps left by other stuff.

It's filler. Yeah. Just keep... It's silly as no more gaps. Yeah. 822, Fact of the Day is next. What's our theme this week? Contraception.

Oh, okay. We've got some very interesting facts about contraception, so that's the theme this week. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. It's time for... Fact of the Day, Day, Fawn and Hayley. It's time for... Fact of the Day. Day, day, it's sorry. It's rough, dude. Hey, don't apologise to me. You get on those lemon honeys. I know, I will. Hey, actually, I will get a lemon honey.

Do you want a throat spray? No, I'm not doing that. That's the devil's work. Do you know I got my mum into throat spray at the weekend? No! Oh, my God. Stop with the throat spray. You do it every day.

We love a bit of throat spray. Love a little... And you did that not-brew spray every day for like six months. Yeah. But that's more like a whole year because I melted my sinuses. But that was a problem I didn't know. Don't do that. Don't use a nasal spray more than a few days in a row.

You look like Stevie Bloody Nicks. Yeah. It says it on the packet, Vaughan. Three days. But I don't snore. Yeah, because it's all hollow in there. Yeah, there's nothing in there. Actually, when I do try to snore, it whistles like a cave.

Yeah. Now, what are you going to tell us about contraception? Contraception, throughout the week, I'm going to tell you a whole lot of stuff. I thought I'd start on the light end of things. Deceptomies. What?

No, no, no. The different names for the contraceptive pill around the world because do you know how you just say the pill and no one ever says what pill? Because I even knew the pill is the pill. The OCP. There are many, many kinds

and they all mess with you differently. Yes, they do. They've got different balances of different hormones, and you've got to find the one that works for you, and it's a process. Because you were on the Janine for a while. Jeanette. Jeanette. Yasmin was the one that worked for me the most, but it was very expensive.

Now I'm off it, and just like, fingers crossed. Is there a fingers crossed day? Dude, we're going to talk about fingers crossed. Isn't that just being a Catholic? Yeah, pretty much. Or my doctor calls it actively trying. Oh, my God. Amazing.

You tell your doctor to stop wishing that on you. I said, oh, shush, shush, shush. That's what I always say to the doctor, too. How many drinks a week? Oh, shush, shush, shush, shush. Oh, you, you're funny. What did you say to Dr. Shorty once? I know my body.

He said, do you know how many times I've heard that? Yeah, I know. I know what I'm doing. I know my body. He said, do you know how many times I've heard that? Yeah, I know. I know what I'm doing. I know my body. When they're back with their pregnancy. So we're working up to what the Germans call the pill, right? That's the piece I had resistance. The pill.

The pill. The pill. But the Dutch, they refer to it as the pill or the anti-Oren van pill, which is the anti-stalk pill. So it stops the stalk from coming. That's cool. The Finnish, very clinical, you know, the Finns. Yeah, very straightforward.

Lapsen stornpilleri, which literally means the child prevention pill. Oh, yeah. So it'd be like, have you taken your child prevention pill? Child prevention? The child prevention pill. Well, that is the point.

In Czech, it's called the kid, it translates to kid barrier. It's the teko sobrana. The kid barrier. The kid barrier. That's my favourite so far. Which sounds like one of those things you buy and you put at the top of the stairs and it's like a gate. You've got to sit there and fall down. Another reason not to have them.

That is not my aesthetic. Those plastic white gates. Surely they do a nice one at Ikea. Do you know what's really hard to find a nice looking one of them? Those things when you childproof your drawers so the kids can't open the drawers. Oh no, I have my handles shipped in. No, we're not putting those little things in. I'm sorry. No.

No. Well, it sounds like you might be needing some child prevention pills. Yeah, I might need a better kid barrier. Yeah. So the Norwegians, whilst also calling it the pill, also call it the Baby Bremst, which stands for baby break. Oh, yeah. It's putting a break on the chance of having a baby.

The Polish, the formal term is anti-dyskowa, which means the anti-kid pill. Yeah. But the best one from around the world is what the Germans call it. It is literally called anti-baby pill. It's the most German thing to call it, the anti-baby pill. And it's even said anti-baby pill. Oh, that's the...

But in a German accent as one word. Anti-baby pill. Anti-baby pill. Have you taken your anti-baby pill? If you don't want the babies. And we're just the pill, the OCP. Yeah, and they said it's one of the rare occasions where you literally don't need to describe what medication you're on.

On the pill. You say the pill. The pill. You never say a pill. I don't say a pill. What kind of pill are you taking? But if you say the pill, everyone's like, ah, the pill. Yes, they do.

They all know. Ah, pill. Take your pill. So today's fact of the day, and the first of contraceptive egg is that the Germans literally call the pill the anti-baby pill. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Tish. Is it Tish or Trish? Tish. Tish. I feel like she gets Trish. Tish Cyrus recently unfollowed Miley on socials. And you know the internet just read into it.

How do people, I guess they search followers. I know, I'm always like, who's doing that? Who even notices this stuff? I know. She appeared to unfollow her on Instagram. And then she came out being like, oh, I don't know what happened. Everyone was like, drama.

Well, Miley Cyrus put up a story. I follow Miley on Instagram. She said, I rarely comment on rumours, but my mama and I are too tight for anything to ever come between us. She's my best friend, like a lot of mums. She doesn't know how to work her phone and somehow unfollowed me,

simple, coincidental and very uninteresting. What social was it that she unfollowed me simple, coincidental, and very uninteresting. What social was it that she unfollowed her on? Instagram. I will say it is easy to unfollow someone. You can easily be scrolling followers and knock a button. On their profile and then you're like, totally. I know, totally. Yeah.

But, like, this was her clarifying. She hasn't actively done this. It was a mum whoopsie. I love that. Like lots of mums. She doesn't know how to work her phone. Come here, Miley. Miley, how do I do. I love that. Like lots of mums. She doesn't know how to work her phone. Come here, Miley.

Miley, how do I do? I feel I'm not seeing your stories anymore. You're not following. Oh my God, it's getting worse and worse with my mum. How do I find your father's iPhone? I don't know, mum. Have you got it on Find My? Yeah, I think I have. Okay, open this. Well, it's not logged in.

Well, it's not there. It's not showing me the thing. I've put in my email. What email? Well, I don't know. Which one? Yeah. But also, I remember when we first got Facebook, my mum always thought that posting on someone's wall

was private. That's dangerous. Oh, that's dangerous. That's dangerous stuff. Like, hey, are you guys coming around at three? Craig and I will be out. And you're like, mum. Mum. That's a. Oh, that's dangerous. Like, hey, are you guys coming around at three? Craig and I will be out. And you're like, mum. Mum.

That's a message thing. That's a message thing. She's learnt now, but you're like, oh. My favourite is, and people still sometimes do this, they go to search someone. As a status. But it's in the status box and then they press enter. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And then it gets posted. Chris Hemsworth shirtless Thor and you're like oh mum mum I mean great call mum great call. Wonderful thing to google you are a human after all. Yeah but that you've posted that hon. Yeah I love it I love it. It's great to see. Well this is what I

want to know this morning from our lovely listeners what is your parents, what was your parents social media whoopsie? We've uploaded the wrong photo. We've talked about someone we shouldn't be talking about. Well, they just upload a whole album but there's a couple of like, I don't know, photos. Your father's crotch.

That famous meme that goes around of the perfect example of parents using Facebook where the mum asks if something's for sale and then months later replies to herself saying, no, I never had that for sale. Yes, I love that. That's a classic.

Hi, is this still available? Yeah. I'm sorry, I wasn't actually selling this. I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, no, I've never had one of those for sale. Can we start with a text we've just received? Yes, yes. Far out.

It's not a mum. My 85-year-old nana in England posted on her story both her bank details and a picture of her tits. Wait, was the picture of tits on said day or were they like retrospective? I don't know. How great do my tits look in the 60s? I don't know.

I don't know. I'm going to need more backstory there. Why did she have a picture of her Boobies Obviously taken in portrait Obviously Landscape, not a big landscape Okay, 0800

966 Text or call now What was your parents social media whoopsie Miley Cyrus cleared the air About her fight Quote unquote with Tish Cyrus, her mum, because Tish unfollowed her on Instagram and she was like, she's just a mum who doesn't know how to use her phone.

It was an accident. It was an accident. She bummed unfollow. She bummed unfollow. We want to know what was your parents' social media whoopsie whoopsie. Some great stories coming through. Jess, what was the parent whoopsie on social media? Hi, guys. Yes, what was the parent whoopsie on social media?

Hi, guys. So my mum was trying to send me some post-care instructions for a female biopsy. Oh, yeah. And she posted that on her Facebook story with a song in the background. What was the song? It was classical music. Right. And all of this was by accident? It was classical music. Right.

And all of this was by accident? By accident, yeah. With a song. Was it specifically addressed to you? Like, hey, Jess, this is how to look after your lady parts. Or was it just kind of like a screen cap of something she'd found? No, thank goodness. It was just a photo of the instructions.

But I was like, Mum, why are you giving people the free advice they haven't asked for? Yeah. Oh, that was just for you, my darling.

Yeah. Oh, so many stories. Between us. Yeah, so many stories like this. Thank you, Jess. My poor, some messages in. My poor mum,

rest her soul, once posted a photo on Facebook tagging me saying, happy birthday to my gorgeous girl. However, it wasn't a photo of me. Remember when we all changed our profile pictures to celebrities that we thought we looked a little bit like? Yep. Oh, so she just uploaded

Rashida Jones or something. Yeah, yeah. My gorgeous girl. Wasn't she so lovely? That's not me. That's not me, mum. My nana, a very, very white woman, somehow only texts with the blackest skin emojis available. I mean, that's something you have to go in and change. We tend to use those if we have darker skin, Nana.

Yeah. She also has 12 Instagram posts, and nine of them are accidental uploads using screenshots. Yes! Oh, my God, give us her account. I want to follow. My mum once posted a Snapchat story with my stepdad's balls hanging out

while he was eating his lunch. I've never been so scarred. Far apart. Wait, was that an accident though? Or on purpose? Yeah. My dad regularly posts rants about Trump on his business Instagram account

using some very questionable language. My sister runs his business account and has to delete them so we're always on high alert. We've got notifications set up when he posts. Oh, okay. On behalf of the business, so that we can rush and make sure it's appropriate,

or he's just forgot to log out and log into his other account. Oh, no. Dad. I mean, probably not wrong about Trump and all that, but don't do it on your business account. The rant's about Trump. It doesn't say pro or anti. Oh, okay.

Yeah, it could be either or. You'd be running, wouldn't you? My 90-year-old granddad clicked interested on a Facebook event for local gay man meetup. We're all like, oh, granddad. I mean, if he's into it, he's into it. Granddad! No, totally, but it feels like maybe he might have accidentally.

A few people saying over lockdown, they tried to get their parents to download Zoom and more than one person said that their mum ended up downloading an adult entertainment app rather than Zoom and a whole lot of naked Russian woman really wanted to talk to her on this app.

That's the problem. That's how the scammers get you when you Google something and they'll quite often pay for it to go above the actual app. And then they see the first one and they're like, well that must be it. It's really common if you need a visa for a country. You. And then they see the first one and they're like well that must be it. It's really common if you need a visa for a country

you're like you Google country and visa and there'll just be these websites that will charge you even for a visa that's free.

Oh really? Yeah. Or an entry digital form kind of thing. My mum sent a photo of my newborn that we sent to her

saying he's here to her entire contact list. She said she did it accidentally but literally everyone in her contacts got that photo. Okay you have to select every single contact that we sent to her saying he's here to her entire contact list. She said she did it accidentally, but literally everyone in her contacts got that photo. Okay, you have to select every single contact, Mum. Oh, God.

Keep your texts coming in. 9696 0800. Dials it in. Your parents' social media whoopsies. God, these are making me cringe. So many good ones. Car out. Emily, what did your mum do?

My lovely mum, over COVID, Delta Goodrum used to do lives on Instagram and play music and things. And my mum was convinced that these were calls between her and Delta Goodrum. And so she'd comment like crazy and be writing in and replying to everything. And it was just

the funniest thing in the world. To the point that Delta was shouting her out and wishing my parents happy anniversary. It was crazy. It was so funny. That's pretty funny. That's so sweet. Delta Goodrum as well. So specific.

Emily, thank you. Some messages in. All these other people commenting and then mum's like, I don't know why they're bothering me in Delta on this one. Who else is on this call? My mum ruined our sister's gender reveal by accidentally posting a message

to her timeline revealing the gender she was meant to send it to our grandma who couldn't attend. Oh. Yeah. My mum tried to set up an Uber account one night but accidentally signed up as a driver and she keeps getting texts asking.

How's she doing? She's at the airport. She's like, except ride. How good. accidentally signed up as a driver and she keeps getting texts asking how she's doing. She's at the airport. She's like, except ride. How good. People keep getting into my car. Yeah. I'm just trying to drive around. Or she walks up to the place where the Ubers are picking up.

She's like, are you, you know, are you Steph? And Steph's like, yeah, are you Deirdre? Yeah, that's us. Yeah, well, there she goes. Which one of us should have a car? Yeah, I feel like one of us should have a car. I feel like one. us should have a car. My mum accidentally posted on my Facebook wall, your auntie is doing my effing head

in. Haven't spoken since that. That was three years ago. This is wild. My dad died a year and a half ago. Sorry to hear it. My mum often goes on his Facebook page to see some of his old memories but she forgets she's on there and sometimes we can see my dead dad liking

other people's Facebook posts. Oh no! Mum! Isn't there a way to turn a profile into a In Memoriam one? So that you're not doing that? Yeah.

Wild. Yeah but Mum wouldn't know how to do that would she? I once walked into my daughter's room when she was on a video chat in Kids Messenger at the exact time they took a screenshot.

I was naked. They all had to leave the chat because you can't delete photos in Kids Messenger. I think as an adult you can... Get in there. Go into Kids Messenger. Oh my goodness, that's not great. They screencapped.

Oh, Mum. Does anyone else's mum, instead of just sharing a camera from their camera roll, take screenshots of the photo and then post the screenshot? Do you know what? It's not even mums. I've seen people my age that I went to school with do this. I'm like, what are you doing? And then even if you did screenshot something, you can crop it.

Crop it. It's wild. Georgia was trying to chime in and she wasn't on. Oh, no, but I wasn't. I was, yeah, yeah, actually, yeah. You know Sophie, who does your nails, likes to phone in.

Yeah. I think Georgia likes to phone in. She was just enjoying them passively. I just like to talk to myself, you know? Yeah. My mum most posted on my best friend's timeline when she broke up

with her boyfriend of 10 years saying, God, so happy to hear about that breakup. Never liked him. He drunk way too much. Oh, mum, that's a message. That's the messages, mum. It's a message.

My father's already on his fifth credit card for the year because he keeps getting scammed and clicking on stupid things. He's regularly having full-blown conversations on Facebook with my grandma and neither of them understand that the whole world can see it because it's wall to wall. Yep. He receives 500 emails a day from dumb stuff that he's put his email address in for. 500 emails a day.

Oh, no, no. Someone needs to look it up. We need to unsubscribe. Someone needs to get in and unsubscribe. He needs to not be online, I think, is the key there. I want to give text of the week to the Uber text. Oh, you're so good. That is so good. Somebody said,

my mum posted an Easter photo in front of our Easter baskets. You know, her three little girls for the Easter baskets. But I forgot it was in front of a mirror and she was in dad's t-shirt, no bra and no undies on and it was on her Facebook for three hours and everyone could see her bum hole from behind. Her bum hole! Her bum hole! Her bum hole!

Also, how do you see the bum hole? She'd have to be crouched. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't ask the questions. It's like when people list stuff on Trade Me and they accidentally add a reflection picture or a nude from their gallery.

Let's be honest. We've all been there, right? No. I haven't uploaded a nude by accident to Facebook. I'm going to go Text of the Week to the Uber text because it really tickled me. We've got a $50 Animates voucher. Thanks to Animates making happy happen for pets. I'm going to go text of the week to the Uber text because it really tickled me. We've got a $50 Animates voucher thanks to Animates making happy happen for pets.

Georgia is up next. Have you seen the photos of Vorn as a cowboy? Dude, I got the previews yesterday. I sent you one yesterday. Oh, did you? I messaged a co-worker. Actually, HRA. Vorn, what you said back is far more of an HRA.

I said what in the cowboy. I don't know if that's... You sent me a video of you tearing off your wedding ring and throwing it into the ocean. And I said... Did I? I thought that was just a draft. Did that actually go?

That actually went through. Yeah, got that. Got that one. Okay, if you had to rate, review or marry Fletch, Vaughn or Hayley, what one would it be? Okay, I would marry Hayley. I would have sex. Wait, which one is it?

No, no, no, no. It's only rate, review, marry. Oh, okay. No comment. If I have sex with the podcast, I don't know how that would work. Give us a sexy little review though.