ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - May 6th, 2025

Episode Date: May 5, 2025

On todays episode of Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod: 1/4 Would tell co workers about their bad breath Robo vacuums names SLP - Do you sleep with wet hair? Typical wedding 87k Top 6 - Things to replace the Welly airport eagles Worst work perk Youth translation - Labubu's Denied baby names Carwen's crime update Imposs Phoner - Did you star in something as a kid? Fact of the day Hayley's weird verification Chatgpt mothers day cards See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years in the 1970s, the Mr. Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of plague. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Clark would have threatened him. Go and kill him. If you don't, I'm going to kill you and your wife and your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your son. This is Mr. Asia, a forgotten history. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. From the ZM Podcast Network, this is Flesh, Fawn and Hayley's Big Pod. Thanks to Animates, making happy happen for pets. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley.

Thank you, Brenna, for a good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Two minutes past six. What a day to be alive. I'll say it. What a day to be alive. You know, we're all on the edge of possibility. No, we're on ZM, Hayley.

Have been. Have been for 11 years. Oh my God, I'm so sorry. Wow, she's done it. Oh wow. I forgot we sorry. Wow, she's done it. Oh, wow. I forgot we don't say that word. Now, yesterday, the news came that the eagles in Wellington Airport are going... Are they eagles?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Giant eagles. Yeah, the giant eagles from the Lord of the Rings. From where the workshop made them. Yeah. That they're going, but not in a few months. They were taking them down already, weren't they? They're gone already.

And they weren't sure on what was... Were they up at the weekend when you were there? Yeah. Okay. So I got to see them. Why did they take them down so quick? I don't know. Were they cracking or something?

Because one of them fell down in an earthquake, right? Yeah. And that was like a structural engineering issue. It feels like we're not getting the whole story there. Yeah. It feels like we're not getting the whole story.

I mean, they looked alright on bloody Sunday, but, oh, I'm going to be down there at the airport tomorrow. I'm going to miss them. I'm going to miss them. You're going to miss them.

I'm going to miss them. What are you, Rhyme and Tride? Yeah. I'm not going to see the giant eagles. Well, they'll replace them with something.

Well, that is apparently the plan. Yeah, and that's the top six. The top six things we can replace the Giant Eagles with that really say Wellington. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. According to a study out of America, 24% of workmates would admit, would mention to their co-worker that they have bad breath.

Oh, okay. What, what of that, what, sorry, what percent did you say? 24%, a quarter. Of that 24%, what would, who would do it tactfully and who would just straight up be like. Who? Who? Who? Who?

Yuck, cat breath. Your breath smells like shit. Did you eat shit for breakfast? Yeah. So they were saying like, according to this study, lots of people would feel completely content with telling their partner they had bad breath. Like, oh, you can just brush your teeth. Yeah.

And then slightly less with friends. Family, slightly less than that. But workmates, well, well down at a quarter. What do you think would be easier? Telling someone they had bad breath or they need to put on deodorant? Easier to put on deodorant. I'll be like, poo, you stink. Have you got deodorant?

To a workmate. Like, we, okay, we're not, we're different than normal workmates, right? Yeah. We are genuine friends. We're genuine. I think you can really hear it on air. We're genuine friends. It comes through.

It comes through on the radio. But, you know, if you're just in an office and you don't really know that, you kind of know the person, but you don't really know the person. I think it's easier unless I would rather be told like, oh, Hayley, you're a bit pongy in the pits. Yeah. Then someone being like, you've got bad breath. Because we have emergency deodorant in the locker. We've got emergency deodorant and I always have an Eclipse mint. So I'm always trying to mitigate either.

Yeah. I was recently mocked for my choice of plaques, mouthwash, gentle mint, the pink one. Oh God, grow up. Get a brown Listerine in you. Dude, I grew up,

we've talked about this, I grew up on brown Listerine and I think it's why I've got such high spice tolerance. Yeah, yeah. God, it's spicy. Because you've burnt my tongue, it burnt my developing taste buds off

and it turned my tongue into a leathery petal. Yes. That was gross. What did he say? I don't know, you looked at me right in the eye when you tongue into a leathery pedal. Yes. That was gross. What did he say that was? I don't know and you looked at me right in the eyeball

when you see a big leathery pedal. But I was mocked for it. Right. Because it's called Gentle Mint and it's pink but I love it.

It's great and I've been, I know you're a bit, you've been back on the floss buzz hard. Oh yeah, I floss, yeah. So you floss at work.

But I don't mouth floss. It's actually gross. This is our intervention for you to tell you. I don't care, I'll do it, I our intervention For you to tell you I don't care I'll do it I'll do it He uses picky sticks

Yeah he uses My picky sticks Yeah You don't mouthwash No Ever I don't mouthwash Ever

Apparently it's really bad For your bacteria Yeah it's too harsh Even your gentle middle You don't have I don't swallow it Well it's for your mouth Health

And the bacteria In your mouth It's really bad You've got to keep some of that. You've got to keep it. What do you guys... What do I got to balance this? Some probiotic yogurt toothpaste or something?

You go brown Listerine yogurt concoction. Yeah, right. Wine, wine, wine, wine, wine, wine. But no, you shouldn't use mouthwash. Oh, I don't know about that, man. Are you a dentist? I don't know. No, dentists are the ones that...

There's so many articles about it. Yeah, you shouldn't use mouthwash. I mouthwash while I floss. I get a mouthful of mouthwash, rock that around, spit half of it out, then get in there and floss, floss, floss, floss, floss. There are certain times I'll use mouthwash. Yeah. But, you know, very rarely.

Wait a minute. What was that? What was that? Maybe you're going out for, I don't know, you're going. Well, yeah, maybe. Yeah, okay. Yeah. Well, maybe, yeah, you Yeah. Maybe you're out with someone

and then you've had some big food or something and then you're going to cleanse the palate. Okay. I feel like I don't know what you're talking about. You need to read about it. You need to read about it. Yeah. Because it's really bad.

Give me some Google keywords. I don't know. Is mouthwash good for you? Yeah. Is mouthwash bad for you as the first one? On a whole, mouthwash isn't bad for your health or harmful for you to use.

You can use mouthwash as part of a healthy oral hygiene routine or you can opt out of using it. That's what big mouthwash would say, though. This has big Listerine written all over it.

Do you remember those Listerine little tongue pockets? Dude, yes! They came in the little... And you'd put... It was like a... It was like a tab of acid. Yeah, yeah, I was going to say

it had a big LSD energy. You put it on your tongue and you let it dissolve. And then it would like melt away. Yeah. They were weird, but then I got real hooked on them as a teenager. I was like, got any pockets? Got any Listerine pockets? You'd have one and then you'd go.

Yeah, you got. And the air felt real cold. You found a million bucks. 11 past six. I just want to let you guys know you've never had bad breath. Oh, thank you. Or bad body odor. We do sit a meter and a half apart though

I know but we always kiss when we get to work and we kiss when we leave so I wouldn't know we do a kiss and sniff on arrival yeah hey nice to see you have a bad day

smelling good yeah play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley a professor at Georgia Tech's College of Computing saw people dressing up their

Roombas, their robot vacuum cleaners, online and thought, do you know what? I'm going to study this. Because it's weird, right? I'm going to study this. It's weird, right? People are dressing up their robot vacuum cleaners. I think some of them, like, some people put their cats on them. It's real

cute. Oh, that's my fave. Yes, cat riding a Roomba. Because that's what, we've, that's my fave. But they go to some skiing. Because that's what we've got one. And his name is Robbie. And I wanted to buy stickers and stuff off Timu to give him my eyes and what have. Look at that. I just looked up Roomba costumes. There's a Darth Vader versus bloody Luke Skywalker outfit.

That's cool. Or people dressing them up as ghosts for Halloween. That's cool. Or people dressing them up as ghosts for Halloween. That's cool. Well, a new study shows how deeply some robot vacuum cleaners, robot owners, become attached to their robot vacuums. Well, it's almost a maid of sorts. So most of them give them nicknames. A lot of them worry when they signal for help. Oh, yeah, because they're like, help! Help! I'm caught on something!

And so they come to their rescue and yeah, the study found that they treat them like trusted pets in the home. When you give something a human quality, you know, when you... Anthro... Yeah. Anthro... I can't remember what it's called. But I sort of get it because the Roomba is there

helping you and serving you. Yeah, it does more than most it's called. But I sort of get it because the Roomba is there helping you and serving you. Yeah, it does more than most people's kids. Yeah. Almost get a Roomba and not a charm. I would say get a team of Roombas. Yeah. I don't have a Roomba. I don't trust them.

I think they're crazy and that they'll... Because, you know, do you remember seeing that thing? No, you're worried you're going to get in trouble for it bumping into the wall oh my god because they do they bump into walls they bump into

the wall if that tripped my skirting boards I know yeah Aaron and I would be having chats

it'd get put in a clay bird shooter and flung and then shot with a shotgun boom these are new skirting boards

if I didn't have a step up thing I would 100% have one. Could you not, if you got a room, could you not build a little ramp up your little step? We have talked about that,

haven't we? There's a video on YouTube of a guy who built like a lift for it. So it goes in and when the weight goes on the platform, the door shuts behind it, which triggers the thing to take it up to the next level.

And then the other side opens. So when it's trying to find, it's like, oh, okay, I can get out here now and it'll map, it'll da-da-da-da-da. Oh, God.

How good. But with all that hassle, are you not better just getting a stick back and doing it yourself? Oh, totally. 10 minutes. Yeah, totally. Yeah. But also if you're out and you've got a slightly longer carpet, you come back and it's done patterns, it's done the lines, it looks like a cricket ground.

That's pretty good stuff. No. That's pretty good stuff. It's not for me. See, all of this just rings true with this study. You've named yours. Yeah, what's yours called? Robbie.

You worry about yours is called Robbie. Robbie the RoboVac. Yeah. And Donnie, we've got the pool one. He's Donnie the Dolphin. He cleans the pool. Right. These are very handy machines.

I've not named a single appliance or machine in my house. You know what I really want? What? You know what I really want? Oh, the lawn. The lawn. The lawn. Have you seen these, Fletch?

Yes. They're always outside Hellertown. There's like, there's these robot lawn mowers. See, that's something I wouldn't trust. And they do nice patterns. That's something I wouldn't trust. It's got blades on it. Blades.

Yeah, but it's got a lot of, it's not, it's the newer generation, they've all got all the safety features and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But once they turn on you, you could be asleep in bed. You wake up. How's it getting up the stairs? And it's next to you on the pillow. Yeah.

Knock, knock, knock. And you're like, who's that at this hour? That won't happen to me because I always say please and thank you to ChatGPT. I don't. I'm rude. Dude, you cannot be rude to ChatGPT. Do this. No.

Do this. Please or hi. And I always say hi to ChatGPT. I'm always like, thank you. It's the same with like Alexis and everything. I always say thank you. In the middle of the night, Alexa wants a time and she's like, it's 618 AM. It's so sub of you.

Dude, yeah. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see who survives the great robot uprising. Probably the guy who uses manners. ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Today's silly little poll is do you go to bed with wet hair? Sometimes. Yes.

Sometimes I do. My hair is so thin it dries in seconds anyway. But like I'll put a pillow, I'll put a towel on the pillow and just be like I can't be bothered getting a hair dryer out tonight. And then all I've got is I fall asleep is my mum's voice in my head being like, you'll catch a cold. You're going to get sick. I went to bed with wet hair last night and I have woken up with a slight sore throat.

So, yeah, I can't be happy. Oh, yeah, Patsy's got you there. Thank you, Patsy. Patsy's got you there. That's what she's talking about. Do you go to sleep with wet hair? 60% of people said no, but 40% of people did say yes.

That's nuts. Like, have a shower earlier. How long does it take to dry your average head of hair? Well, I don't have an average head of hair. Mine's like 10 minutes. 10 minutes with a dryer or just in the towel? Ask the girlies. Karwin and Shannon, you guys have normal density hair.

Luscious locks. Luscious locks. Luscious locks. How long would your hair take to dry au natural? Probably nearly two hours. Yeah. Jesus. Yeah. I'm like 30 min. Really? Wisp.

Yeah. My hair is thin and half of it's not mine. Mine's thin but there's a lot of it. Yeah. God it must be nice having hair. No it's not. It's annoying though. We sort of fulfil the whole hair spectrum.

From bald men to very thin, balding women to luscious, locked ladies. We've got it all. We've got it all here at ZM. Well, Shelly said, I always get a sore neck when I do. A sore neck? Because it's so here. Because it's so here. Maybe she's getting her dreadlocks wet. Yeah. That'd be heavy. That'd be heavy. I think I'm going to move his pillow to the side. Maybe she's getting her dreadlocks wet. Yeah.

That'd be heavy. That'd be heavy. Big heavy dreads. I go to bed with wet hair, but I put a towel on the pillow, says Zoe. Yeah. You always go to bed with wet hair. Pillows get manky. My Nana always said, you go to bed with wet hair, you get a cold.

And that shit never leaves you. You hear Nana's voice every time you got wet hair. Long-haired people need to stop going to bed with wet hair, said Jenny. It can be really damaging to your hair. And if you tie it up while wet and never let it down to dry, it can start growing fungus. That's actually how I went bald. You got fungus.

Yeah, fungal infection. Tying up my dreadlocks. Is that hereditary? No, it was fungal. Fungal. Anyone with curly, wavy hair gets frizzy hair and wonky curls when it's slept on wet. Tanya said,

I hate going to bed with my hair wet. I would rather shower in the morning or early enough so it dries naturally before bed. Why don't you just use a shower cap to keep it dry in the shower? Well, you might as well do, right?

It's just when you wash it is when it gets wet. I think lots of people that have... I think it's so weird to have a shower and not stick your head under the... Yeah. See, I do all the time.

Yeah, Aaron does it. Like, Aaron always will wet his hair. I'm like, why are you doing that? Every shower, yeah. Just keep your head under there. Yeah. See, I do all the time. Yeah, Aaron does it. Like, Aaron always will wet his hair. I'm like, why are you doing that? Every shower, yeah. Just keep your head out of there. No, it's nice getting the face under there. Rob said, I'm bald and I feel like we should be represented here. So thank you, Rob.

Apologies, Rob. We'll do a bald, silly little poll later. My hair takes, Laura must have a lot of hair, because my hair takes half a day to dry on a sunny, windy day. What? Or a constant hour of blow drying. I wash mid-afternoon and it's still damp at bedtime, so sleeping with wet hair, it is like it is. I only wash my hair every 10 days.

High maintenance. Got nice looking hair here. Does she need a better hair dryer? Is she using a $10 Kmart one? No, she's got a lot of hair. That's insane. I want to see how much hair. Going into the profile, are you?

Yeah. I'm having a stalk. Why are you doing this? It feels like an abuse of privacy here. Oh, private account. Oh, and the profile picture's sort of a dog. Like a golden doodle or something. Oh, they take a while to dry, too.

They take a while to dry, too. One's got a very... I've got one that takes ages to dry. Does he? Because of the curl. Yeah. And how thick it is. For a thin-haired girl who's going to sleep with my hair wet by the morning,

I have mad volume, said Jessie. Yeah, I get that too. So that's a positive there. Rhiannon says, ooh, greasy and mouldy pillow. No, thank you. I'd even thought about

the pillow holding the residual moisture. Sometimes I go to sleep with it half dry, plait in, and then blast it in the morning with a hairdryer and it's out of sheer laziness

when I'm tired. Yeah. Said Nicola. I think if I was a woman and I had lots of hair, I'd just go for a sensible shortcut. You do. I would. I would.

I'd go for a bob. But at your age, you're not waiting for like your 60s or whatever? Remember seeing mums with long hair in the 90s and you're like, wow. Yeah, my mum's always had short hair. Yeah, mums, I think it was just the ruleums with long hair in the 90s and you're like, wow. Yeah, my mum's always had short hair. Yeah, mums, I think it was just the rule

when you had kids in the 80s and 90s, you just got short hair. Yeah. Save on time, I guess. That's what mum does, yeah. It's good when you're on holiday, you know,

you just run your fingers through it. And now you see mums with long hair all the time. Yeah, and you're like, what are you doing? Wait, you're a mum. How do you have time for that? Yeah.

Yeah. Sensible shortcut. Well, I just assume they're not feeding their children. Well, I assume they're prioritising themselves ahead of their family. Yeah, and their clean house. That's disgusting. Their house is probably a sham. For shame, woman. For shame. Cut that hair short and give yourself some time, lady.

Give yourself a nice sensible shortcut. A nice sensible shortcut. You lesbian. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Jeez Louise. Okay, there was a bride. She was marrying her husband.

The initial budget they set was a humble wedding budget of $15,000. Is this New Zealand or America? New Zealand. Okay. She did, you know, nice quiet. We can get a bit of food, small wedding, get some guests. Did the budget. That's not going to cover it, 15 grand.

We'll increase to 40,000. Now we're looking at a sizable wedding. The final spend was 60. So we have four times the original budget. I don't think it's worth it. Then the 60 included return flights from Brisbane,

accommodation for 10 nights, photography, videography, marquee, catering, drinks, a boat trip, dress. They went to Brisbane for the wedding. Yeah. But they're New Zealanders.

Yeah, but they're Kiwis. Right. So Susanna Reid, who is a wedding planner, says that the average cost of a wedding has increased over recent years, which does not align with how the economy has been going and the cost of living crisis. But who am I to say how we spend our money?

In 2023, in New Zealand a typical budget for a wedding was $59,000 Jesus That's two years ago This year $87,000

is the average cost of a wedding People elope or just do a backyard wedding. It's really far out apart. Like, that is so much money. It's insane, eh? Yeah. Like, that's two acting degrees and six years worth of living costs.

Yeah, it's like- When I think about my student loan, I'm like, oh my God. It's a couple of uni degrees. Couple of uni degrees. Yeah. It's also a great worth of living costs. When I think about my student loan, I'm like, oh my God. It's a couple of uni degrees. A couple of uni degrees. It's also a great deposit for a home. I was going to say I was going to do some interest calculations. That's more money than we had when we first bought a house. Like, that's it, that's it, that's it, that's it.

It's insane. Also, in my head as well, when I think about, yes, you could pay off your student loan or buy a nice house, I'm like, imagine the year of travelling you could have on $87,000. You could travel for so long. You could travel the world. You could go to cheap places. You could hang around. I'm not poo-pooing.

It's your money. You can do whatever you want. If you want a lavish wedding, you do it. But this is a world, everyone's sold on this fairytale dream of getting married and having your special day. So many of my friends are already getting divorced, and I'm in my 30s. Do you know what I mean? And I'm not trying to poo-poo the idea of love.

Love is dead. Love is dead. But it's just crazy. I'm sorry, but that is stupid amounts of money. Is that mostly the main centres? It's not broken down in that way, I'm not sure. Yeah, I mean, you would imagine so because, you know, you think a rural one,

someone's got a paddock. Yeah. Someone's got this. But then you've got to have a marquee, you've got to have catering, you've got to have, you know, like, it adds up. You actually don't have to have anything. That's all.

You can just go down to the registry office. Yep. Yep. No, you don't. Who said this? Slap a bloody shirt on. Yep. Yeah, man, go to Hel the registry office. Yep. Yep. No, you don't. Who said this? Slap a bloody shirt on. Yep. Yeah, man.

Go to Helmsteins. Get one of those cheap suits. Yeah, dude. Liz Coe, who's a financial coach in New Zealand, said you have to remember that whatever you spend on a wedding is money you will not have for other important goals in your life. So you're allowed to, if spending $80,000 on a wedding is a priority to you

then you're safe to do that it just means it's going to take longer for you to save for things like a house or achieve other financial goals like starting a family or travel. Or especially if you have a student loan like that's each of you paying off your student loan nearly or entirely. One of my friends

who by the way is going through a divorce not that it matters, she's allowed to nearly. One of my friends, who by the way, is going through a divorce. Right. Not that it matters, she's allowed to. One of my friends who was going through a divorce, when they got married, I remember her telling me that this was years ago as well,

her wedding budget was, it's just a big like winery, you know, Hawks, that thing, was 45,000. I remember at the time thinking like far apart.

That's crazy. And that neither of them were in high paying jobs. And I was like, and neither of them came from wealthy families. And I was like, how did you pay for this? And they got, they borrowed the money. And I remember thinking like, do you want to start your marriage with this extra debt?

You know, just feel anyway. Which you're also probably adding to your student loan debt. And you know, it's insane. Do you think it's worse now though, because of Instagram and social media? Like, we've got to have that special day. It's got to look amazing. Yeah. Oh, 100%.

So, a few messages in from our listeners currently. I'm getting married in 2027. Got a bit of a lead in time. Okay, yeah. Budget is 25K. Also buying a house this year. So, you're kind of doing the house first. See, that's25,000. Also buying a house this year. So you're kind of doing the house first. See, that's smart, yeah.

But your budget's $25,000, but $25,000 in 2025 might not be $25,000 in 2027. But that's how inflation works, right? It's the same. We're eloping overseas next year. My family's going to be furious, but eff them. Yeah, when you think about it, though, it's cheaper. If you got flights and a comm in Raro

and you just did it at the hotel yeah that's not going to be that much money right somebody messaged in my partner and I getting married in Fiji

in June it was $23,000 that includes flights and accommodation for us and our whole family 16 people and of course photographer dinner

canapes drinks and venue celebration yeah there you go that's a package deal and that's for 16 people but wait they're paying for all 16 people.

Yeah. By the sounds of it. Accommodation and flights for our whole family, which is 16 people. So what's that divided by? It's a couple of grand, not even a couple of grand each. Like $1,500, $16 each. Well, it sounds like they're paying for it. But if $23,000 is within your budget and you get to pay for your friends and family to be there.

Yeah. And then everybody else who's coming pays their own way. Yeah. Getting married in November, the budget is $10,000. Then someone else said, backyard wedding this year in October, $30,000 budget.

Because you don't need to bring everything in. We're like, to Queenstown, it costs about 10K and that included a week-long honeymoon. See, here you go. It can be done cheaper. But if you want the gown and the thing and the this and the this,

don't do it. If you're getting a cake, don't tell them it's a wedding cake. Just say it's a cake. Yeah. And then you want the gown and the thing and the this and the this, do it. If you're getting a cake, don't tell them it's a wedding cake. Just say it's a cake. And then you plop the wedding things on because the minute you put the W word in front of anything, it costs a fortune. Just get a three-tier happy birthday cake and peel off the happy

birthday icing. That's right. And plop your wedding topper on. Do it in big Costco sponges. Costco sponge. You know we love Costco sponge. Go to get on Teemu and get your wedding little sign and your little bride and groom or whatever. Tell a photographer you just want to hang out with them for the day. Don't say it's a wedding. Just say, but I am going to need you from sunup till sundown.

I just want you to follow me and my friends for a whole day. Yeah, tell them photos. Or put up here. That would actually be a great idea. Just what? I just want you to follow my friends. Just hire a photographer. You're catching up with really good friends And you want some nice photos

But you don't want someone To obviously have to take them Yeah Or you don't have to be like Just hire a photographer To just follow you around For a day Snatch some candid pics

Yeah as soon as they Saw our wedding though They'd be past day Yeah We'll say love us dear Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley From the Fletchborn and Hayley

Group chat This is the Top 6 Hi Hi Hello Hi there From the Fletchvorn and Hayley group chat, this is the Top 6. house up. It's like, why not wait until the thing you were going to put up is there to put up? I reckon those wires that were in them were like fraying. Because they did come down and one of them did come down in an earthquake

and I don't think we're getting the full story. It didn't hit the deck though, it just swung. One of the things came out and it swung. They're doing a huge reno there,

like that whole food bit in the main. Oh, is that why? It was all walled off, like they're doing a full main carver. What about the dragons? Dragons staying.

Dragon was still there. The dragon has not been said to remove. Okay, well, apparently they're putting something else in. Yeah. You've got some ideas. I've got the top six ideas for Wellington Airport's replacement of the Giant Eagles. Number six on the list are all of the government employees that David Seymour laid off. Just a constant reminder of when he's working, walking through.

So you would just have the unemployed public servants just kind of on harnesses. Yeah, okay. Yeah, on harnesses. Yeah, okay. Yeah, in harnesses or seats or it would be comfortable for them. And then when he walks through to fly somewhere, they'd just be, Boo, boo, boo. Yeah. And the rest of the time they're just like, got a job? Got a job?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. And then they're already at the airport. So every day one of them draws a ticket and gets to move to Australia. Okay. Something tells me he'd walk past and not care. Yeah, I know. They'll be spitting on him though if they want.

They're allowed to spit on him. Our number five on the list of the top six replacements for Wellington Airport's Giant Eagles. A tribute to all the amazing street personalities that Wellington's given us over the years. Led, of course, by Blanket Man. Oh, of course. Beatbox guy was there when I was there on the weekend. Was he? And the bush guy with his saxophone. And I was like, Wellington, it by Blanket Man. Oh, of course. Beatbox guy was there when I was there on the weekend. Was he? And the bush guy with his saxophone.

And I was like, Wellington, it's good to be home. Yeah, all of them. All of them are tribute to Wellington. Oh, and the juggler with the semi. Come again? Wellingtonians know what I'm talking about. The juggler with the semi. There's an old guy who used to juggle at the end of Courtney Place

and he always had a semi. Massive Wang. Nope. Not massive. But it was always semi. Good for him. Juggling really did it for him. Oh, okay. It sounds like there should But it was always semi. Good for him. Juggling really did it for him.

Oh, okay. It looks like there should have been some kind of shield in front of that. He wore a light track pant. Yeah, right.

Okay. At number four on the list of the top six replacements for Wellington Airport's Giant Eagles, a gallery of ex-Prime Ministers.

Okay. You know, like, you know the ones that you were at the pub over the road. By the way, because I wanted to say we'll just get all of those.

The back benches. The back benches are still open, eh? Yeah. Okay. That's what they need, the caricatures. Yeah, the caricatures.

That would be fun. Yeah. But they've got to be like their best moments. Like it's going to be John Key with a hot dog in his mouth. With a hot dog in his mouth

and a big gay out. Yeah. Chris Hipkins saying like spread your legs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Those sorts of things. Bill English with a pineapple or the pizza with spaghetti on top.

Going for a walk run. That's right. Number three on the list of the top six replacements for Wellington Airport's giant eagles. I reckon just another bucket fountain.

Just a big one? Just another bucket fountain. And does it work? Yeah, of course it does. You walk under it and it could tip. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, great.

That'd suck. You just arrived in Wellington and you're like, cool Yeah, I love that. Yeah. Okay, great. That'd suck. You just arrived in Wellington. You're like, cool city. Let's go check. Now I'm drenched. Well, you've got to dodge it. That's part of it. It's just a bit like being in Wellington anyway.

Wow. Drenched. I'll see you tomorrow, Wellington. I can't wait to get away from these all-tenders. I'll also see you this weekend. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Look who came crawling back.

I'm not going to see you guys. Sorry, Wellington. You were invited. Number two on the list of the top six replacements of a Wellington Airports Giant Eagles are everybody that's ever been a New Zealand meme. I'm talking Nick Minnick guy. I'm talking always on the pie.

The guy that was just doing some dots when the Iron Offenders squad raided the place down the road. It was the same day, David. Yeah, get rid of that on there. Don't say sorry to me, say sorry to his kids. Not in Guatemala now, Dr. Ropata. Yeah. Perfect.

So many. Ever been on the internet. And number one on the list of the top six replacements for Wellington Airports, Giant Eagles, the 2011 All Blacks riding Pavlovas. Yes. Kiwi on it. That's pride. That's as Kiwi as it gets.

Yeah. Dan Carter, you're Richie, you're Pity Weepoos. What a year, eh? You're Stephen Donalds. What a year. How are You're Stephen Donalds. What a year. How are we doing the kick? He should probably be leading, actually, on the lead. Yeah, be there.

On the lead, Pavlova with some kiwi fruit on it. That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. There was a Reddit post yesterday, spotted when someone was looking for a job on seek.co.nz. Okay. And they say, ooh, look at this, what an incentive. And it says, I don't know where this job's at,

but it says free monthly pie and coffee. So once a month, you get a coffee and a pie. Do you think that was a joke? I don't think so. Okay, yeah. I mean, fine if once a month a pie and a coffee turns up, but I wouldn't be listing that as part of a perk of the job. Wait, how big is the pie?

Is it a nice pie, like a cheese? Look, there's no talk of the quality of pie, but I feel like if it was a quality pie, it would be... Like a dessert pie? It could be a giant dessert pie in a coffee. Family-sized pie. Yeah. Apple pie.

It's not going to be key lime. It's not going to be key lime. It's not going to be once a month key lime. That's too much of a benefit. You are dreaming and you're actually asking too much if you're asking for a once a month key lime. It's not going to be key lime. It's not going to be once a month key lime. That's too much of a benefit. You are dreaming and you're actually asking too much if you're asking for a once a month key lime pie.

But people have been roasting this on Reddit because rightly so. Like that's not a perk. Perks are like insurance, car park, little treaties. Not a pie and a coffee. For God's sake.

I mean no, if Ross Boss is listening, I would. We get free Milo, don't we? Free Milo and coffee. We actually get a free coffee machine. There's instant,

yeah, there's coffee machines. There's the coffee. Every time I go out there, I forget to hit the new coffee machine. I always just go for it. I just like instant. Yeah, I just like instant.

Yeah. So simple people. We don't get pies though. We're men of the people. Yeah, we're very much of the people. I'm very much a woman of the people.

I don't know about that. Do you think that the pie would be pecan? Caramelised bourbon pecan pie. Bourbon, burnt butter pecan pie. Yeah, now we're talking. Well, we want to know from you this morning, on 0800 Dials at M, you can text her as well,

9696, what is your worst work perk? Something that's so old as a... Oh yeah, great. You guys get this and you're like something that's so oh yeah great you guys get this and you're like that's really not that great do you want to get the ball rolling

with some of our Instagram responses I just read one of the Instagram responses it's so funny 50 cents off a life insurance policy 50

oh cut it out a week or month I mean that's that'll be a month but still not going to add up. That's a bigger F you than, I'll just be like, no.

How dare you? Yeah, because I'm imagining you have to go with their life insurance provider, which probably isn't going to be the best deal. 50 cents. If it's a massive company, maybe they get a little bit of a sweeter deal. That's not a cent off. That's $6 a year. It's a kick in the guts, eh?

You can barely even buy a pie for that. You couldn't even buy a pie and a coffee. And you go and ask your boss for a pay raise, he's like, what about the life insurance? Let's take into account your $6 a year off life insurance. Yeah, you're not acknowledging the discounted insurance that you get working for this company. Kate said free entry to Disney World.

What? Why is that a bad perk? Because I guess you've got to spend so much money to get to Disney World because that's Orlando, right? Oh my, is that if you work for Disney? I don't know who Kate works for. Oh my goodness. Free entry to Disney World. Remember that time you met the guy at the train

station or the bus stop? Yeah, at Disneyland. And he gave you free tickets? Yeah, because he forgot his wallet and couldn't afford the taxi. I said, oh, you jump in our taxi. We'll taxi to Disneyland. Then we got there and he got us in on staff pass. First time I went to Disneyland. See, being nice.

That's why you should be nice to strangers. I am always nice to strangers. Eilish said the worst work purpose were they gift time, which essentially means that the meeting finished early by 10 minutes. So you've been gifted the time. So go back to your desk and do nothing for 10 minutes? Yeah. So this is your ungifted time.

The company said they were introducing a new mental health day policy. And we were like, oh, that's good. Yeah. It turns out all they meant was now you are allowed to use one of your five sick days as a mental health day. Which we were doing anyway, dude. Yeah. That's not an addition.

No. Lizzie said I get 15% off an Auckland dentist. But I live and work in Christchurch, so. So you've got to fly up to get your 15% off. That's really going to work. Even if you've got some sale flights, that's not going to. Yeah. And also they'd be like, oh, you need to come back next week to, you know, when we've got

more time to do this filling. You'd be like, oh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now I've got to get flights. I'm just going to take a mold and you're going to have to come back. Come back, yeah. Oh, I can't afford that.

Somebody else said, I'm going to leave their name out of it. Okay. But they said, I get 20% off brand new Range Rovers. Whoa. The problem is, I would need 99% off

to afford a brand new Range Rover under the wage that they pay me. Yeah, to be fair. Okay, 0800DARLS.M. Give us a call now. You can text through. 9696. What is your worst work perk?

I asked some messages in. Somebody said, I recently asked if there were any work perks at this company, and they said you get paid monthly for doing your job. I hate when they say that. Oh, that's it. He says that shit to me every now and then. You've been there when he says that to me. No, I haven't. You get paid every two weeks.

Well, sometimes you just need to be reminded that this is a job, not a hobby. I actually don't want it to be a job. When it's a hobby, I enjoy it, but as soon as you put the J word on something, I feel resentful. It's like after holidays, Vaughan resents coming back to work. I hate this place. Well, you have to. It's called

life, Vaughan. I love the people. I love the people. Anonymous, what is the worst work perk for you? We know, during COVID, I work at a big school. Yeah. And when we went up to our cubby holes,

we'd been gifted, I have a feeling it was actually part of Christmas, but they'd made the school logo face masks for us. Bright green. Bright green. Bright green. I don't want to wear them. Yeah, no, you're not really, are you? You just want to wear the normal, usual masks or your own one.

Yep, yep. And then they brought in the proper, you know, three whatever they were, the proper ones for the school. Oh, yeah, the N90 whatever. Oh, this is all triggering talk. I just kept it as a souvenir. It's just hilarious. Like, what on earth?

I don't want to wear that. You've actually wasted your money. Yeah. It's a supermarket. I know. Sometimes they're well-meaning, aren't they? But they're just, it's not. They're also just getting free marketing on your face.

Is it a private school or a public school? No, it's a public school. Yeah, so there's not a lot of money in the public school. No. No. If you work for a private school and they're like, we've got a lovely mask for you, you'd be like, get real public school. Yeah, there's not a lot of money in the public school. No. No. If you worked for a private school and they're like, we've got a lovely mask for you, you'd be like, get real. Yeah.

Yeah. Anonymous, thank you. Vanessa, what's your worst work perk? I used to work for a big dairy company and we would get gift baskets carried out to us of all our products. So we'd have especially with cheeses and flavoured milks and yoghurts and it's quite exciting because it was really,

really delicious. But every single time they were all expired. No, we don't do expired dairy. No, wait a minute. But what? Like cheese, I'm eating cheese pastas.

Yes, I'm. But not yoghurt. If it's a sealed fancy cheese. Not yoghurt. Not milk. Yeah, that was flavoured milk and yoghurt. Everything was expired. But also, it's all their products cheese. Not yogurt. Not milk. Yeah, that was a flavored milk and yogurt. Everything was expired.

But also, it's all their products. It's all free. Like, just give us unexpired. Those free stuff. So you're basically, Vanessa, you were just basically like a tip, like a bin. Yeah, I was saving them dump fees. A human dump. You're a human dump.

You're actually a genius from Big Dairy there. Big Dairy. Genius from Big Dairy. Vanessa, Dairy. Genius from Big Dairy. Vanessa, thank you. Okay, your worst work perk, some messages in. Worst work perk? That's actually quite hard to say. Worst work perk?

A free roast chuck if you did a good job. Mean. What, like a bachelor's hammock? Or they'd give you a frozen chuck? I don't know, but who's in charge of deciding if it's a good job or not? I mean, I wouldn't turn down a roast chuck. If you could roll one of those every day. Someone said, I've been getting free a... If you could roll one of those every day. Someone said,

I've been getting free dinners lately. Oh, okay. They go on to explain that the new government-issued school lunches are so bad and arrive so late that the kids have gone and sometimes they're just like, well, you might as well take this out for dinner.

Oh, okay. They say they're not great, but they're free. No, they're not great, though. Didn't they have butter chicken for a week? Yum, though. I mean, I'm not mad at butter chicken butter chicken for a week? Yum though. I mean, I'm not mad at butter chicken every day for a week. That's good stuff.

You start going orange though. Yeah, you do. I got given a ticket to Tony Robbins in Sydney, but I had to pay for accommodation flights and to upgrade the ticket. If I didn't want to. Yeah, that's not a perk, is it? Hasn't Tony Robbins gone a bit wackadoodle? I don't know. Hasn't he gone a bit? No, I don't know. I think he has? Hasn't Tony Robbins gone a bit whack-a-doodle? I don't know.

Hasn't he gone a bit... No, I don't know. I think he has. Hasn't he? I think he has. We get staff lunch every day, which is written as a perk in the employee documents. There's about 50 staff on every day.

We get a bowl of salad that's half full, half a tray of rice, half a tray of curried chicken. It's like the Hunger Games every lunch. If you're a vegetarian, which a lot of us staff are, you just have plain rice and salad. Probably bring your own. Yeah, be one. We do stock takes and trainings.

It's unpaid work, but boy do we get paid in pizza at the end of that. Oh yeah, management love a pizza party, don't they? That helps with the mortgage. I used to work at a supermarket in high school. We got a one cent discount. Which didn't count if you paid in cash. A one cent discount?

One cent. Mm. The worst work pick is the free coffee machine, cheese crackers, and biscuits that we get every day. Wait, that sounds all right.

Yeah. Free biscuits. Yeah, I don't know. That's pretty good. Wait, are they good at biscuits? Oh, do you reckon they're dieting?

Oh, yeah, maybe. Oh. Do you reckon they're trying to stay slim? But if there's bickies, you have to have a pickies. If there's bickies, we have a pickies. I'm glad there's not bickies here every day. If there were bickies here every day, I'd have a pack.

I can't say no to bickies. Yeah. No, I can't say no to bickies. I get 10% off Mercedes, but I can't afford a Mercedes. That's it, right? Can you buy your friends or people that are coming in to buy a Mercedes, can you buy it for them and get the cash equivalent? That's fraud, eh?

Yeah, that's great. That's a good call, actually. Is that naughty? Someone to look into. My old boss shouted donuts every Wednesday, but didn't believe that dairy or gluten intolerance was a thing. He said that was all in your head. Nor did he accept the polite refusal of donuts for people

who were both dairy and gluten intolerant. Jeepers. And so he'd just pick one out and leave it on your desk and you'd end up just chucking it in the bin at the end of the day. Oh dear. We've had a policeman text in saying that the perk of his job is PTSD. It's probably not. I don't know. The P in PTSD doesn't stand for perk. Yeah.

Perk Traumatic Stress Disorder. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Jesus. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Now, this is the thing. We were talking about this yesterday, and I was like, what is happening? I didn't know that we spoke different languages.

Labooboos. The girls were talking about the fact that they lined up for something, then they showed it to me, and I just could not wrap my head around why and what. See, I understood when you lined up for cinnamon buns. I get that. I don't need a youth translation for that because universally...

Cinnamon buns are delicious and sticky and yummy and you eat them and then for a little bit you feel good and then you feel bad. And then you feel bad. That's the contract. But you have lined up for a toy. Yes. So these are, I would say, these are the cinnamon buns of

the toy collectible world. But you're not a toy collector. Hey. You're a grown adult. I don't get it. We're grown adults with disposable income and this is how we decide to spend it. Exactly. And this is a judgment free zone, otherwise we're stopping the segment.

Can you? Wow. And Gen Z have spoken. Exactly. And this is a judgment-free zone, otherwise we're stopping the segment. Can you... Wow. And Gen Z have spoken. Wow. That's fair. I like it. Gen Z is so bossy. They put their foot down, eh? Yeah. Gen Z, can you youth translate

la boo-boos to us millennials? What are they and why do people care? Also, save it right until the end to tell Fletch how much you paid for them. Okay, cool. So...

Oh, you're... And this is a judgement-free zone and if you judge us, we will end the segment. That's why I said do it at the end. So you tell him how much it costs. He heavily judges you. You end the segment, but it was the natural end anyway. Okay, so these are

little key chains. They're like a little toy about yay tall. You guys can guess how tall. 15 centimetres? Yeah, four or five inches. I reckon that's good. Do you go inches? Well, when someone holds their fingers up that far apart, Fletch goes inches all the time.

He goes inches. Yeah, right. I've got a lot of American friends. He does. What? He does. Just friends. Okay, carry on.

So about 15 centimetre six inch labubu labubu sub yeah fluffy fluffy little toy they kind of look like a rabbit that's been mixed

with some sort of monster with sharp teeth they've got a real where the wild things are vibes yeah yeah so they originated from this story called the monsters

which is Nordic mythology but a Hong Kong based artist made these from this story called The Monsters, which is Nordic mythology. But a Hong Kong-based artist made these. Appropriation. And they've taken over the world. They're produced by Pop Mart, which are popping up all over the world. And these little creatures are the hot thing to have

if you're a hot, fun, fresh, flirty girl in her 20s. And so would you post on, I'm just trying to get to the root of the purpose, would you post on social media like, got my little boo-boo? Absolutely. It's okay. We filmed our unboxing. Hold back the guys. You filmed your unboxing.

Yeah, so basically there's six main monsters, colours-wise, and then there's a secret one. And the secret one can go for a lot of money. This is how they get you. you've got to go in and buy them. Is it blind boxes? Ah, so you don't know what you're getting, that's how they get you. Like everything at Popmart, right, it's all blind boxes, you don't know

what you're getting. Yeah, so like we filmed ourselves and you've got like the one you hope to get and then you rip it open and it's a big deal, and that's why we lined up for an hour to get the new collection. And then what are you doing with this? And it's your key ring. So you put it on your keys.

I think keys, it's a bit big for your keys. Lots of girlies put them on their bags, their handbags. No, I've got a deadly ponies. No, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm not messing up my deadly ponies. But you're too old anyway, so. Shut up. You're seven years older than me. You shut up. You've got to be careful as well, because people, they're so old anyway. It adds so much to the big thing. Shut up. You're seven years older than me. You shut up. You've got to be careful as well

because people, they're so in demand that they've now created a Labubu case because people will come and rob you if you've got it on your handbag. I was wondering

because that's when something reaches peak cultural influence when they get banned from schools because there's a trading thing that turns into a fifth ring. Pogs. Pogs. I think that these have... Pogs!

How good were pogs? I think people have started trading them at schools. But going back to the price element of this, I think this might not take over schools as so much because...

I'm looking at one and I saw... No, don't say the price. Don't say the price. No, no, no, no, no. I'm not saying the price but I'm looking at one and thinking how much

I would pay for this. It would be $10 max. Max. But like, imagine you've waited for an hour. So, I'm not waiting to- And there's all these girls

in front of you. They look demonic. They're not good. They're monsters. Cute, ugly. But basically, yeah, we lined up for an hour and they come up

and update you during the line. Like, we think you will get them, we think you won't. Oh, so how many Labubus did they have this day you were lined up? So they had 900 to start

and we got 895 and 896 so there were 900 people ahead of you or were people bulk buying so you can buy a set of six for 200 and something

dollars no no no I'm going to say I'm going to say I didn't know you let the cat out of the bag I let the cat out of the bag I'm sorry meow

so just keep in mind Shannon and I fun free fancy girlies yet to have a mortgage yet to have a kid the only responsibility I have really is my child

which is my cat and you know what he doesn't cost very much how much does one cost? $39 $40 that was his pencil that was his pencil

hitting the desk I'm sorry but that's ridiculous but the joy of ripping open a little bag and I will say we both got the one we wanted That was a Spencer hood in the deck. I'm sorry, but that's ridiculous. But the joy of ripping open a little bag. And I will say we both got the one we wanted. Yeah. I reckon.

What one did you want? What's its name? My one is pink and yellow and it's loyalty. I got hope and it's blue. Oh, I was going to say, each of these is sort of like a... These are called the big energy collection. So there's happiness, there's loyalty, there's love, there's prosperity. Christ, we're doomed, there's love, there's prosperity.

Christ, we're doomed, aren't we? We're doomed. They sound like names from bloody what's it? Destiny. No, Gloria Vale. Gloria Vale. I will say. Hope Labubu.

Yeah, Hope Labubu. Presents Labubu. I will say, you three love to go for a little eggs after the show. Yeah. Your eggs after the show is like one labooboo. Yeah. No, it's not. My own porridge and bananas get a bad look from the cafe every time I do it.

It's half a labooboo. And also we're getting nutrients and a great human connection. If millennials stopped eating avocado toast, they would be able to buy a house. It's the same thing. I was going to say, our labooboo's Gen Z's avocado toast.

Yeah. Gotcha. Play Zed M's, Fleshborn and Hayley. So every year we get this list and I always love it. The names declined in 2024 in New Zealand or the year before. Names declined by the Registrar General. Yeah. There's rules.

You can't burden a kid with this. There aren't enough rules. There aren't enough rules. There should be, I think every baby name should go across a desk, a panel of judges of sensible people, and they say yay or nay. Yeah. I'd happily sit on the panel. I would love to sit on the panel. A couple of hours a day, we'd get that done.

Yeah. We'd rock that out. We'd just be like, oh, my God, another Matt. Yep. Matt. Another Hayley. John. Yep.

Another Emma. But imagine, and we should have a bell that we ring when there's a Keith. And be like, mate, welcome back. Yeah, the ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, the Keith bell. And then we'd get one of those Elon Musk child names, like X, Y, Z, X, and we'd be like, ding, ding, ding, ding. We'd be like, okay, decline. What do we think?

Decline. Silly name. Yeah. Decline. So the ones, the list is largely made up of names that are titles. Like king, prince, princess, princess of different spelling, bishop. Made like military names as well.

Major, messiah, Allah, sovereign, saint, royalty, royal, queen, prince, prince. So like Saint, the Kanye's kid, couldn't be called Saint in New Zealand? Not in New Zealand. Wow, okay. So when they travel to New Zealand, it's nameless. Just West, last name West. Yeah, just... Or Kardashian.

Yeah, Master West. Yeah. Lady was on the list as well. That was proposed once in New Zealand. Messiah was proposed once. That didn't make the cut. Royal spelt R-O-I-L. That was cut.

R-O-I-L. That's foil. That's the other thing. If we had a naming committee, we'd get rid of the trashy ones. We'd cut out some trash. The trash spellings. We'd correct it. Yeah.

We'd correct the spelling and send it back. Approved only by this spelling. So our board would deny King, K-Y-N-G. Okay. King. K-Y-N-G. Here's the two. So there's Crown, Crownos, Duke, Emperor.

Here's three that I really love. Oh, no. Name with a symbol was proposed with a, with a, like a, not an apostrophe, like a, like a speech, an apostrophe, like a, like a speech, like almost speech. What do you call that?

Like a tilde? Yeah. No, not a tilde. A tilde is a wiggly thing. Apostrophe. Yeah, like an apostrophe,

but yeah, I like an apostrophe. Weird. Anyway, so, names with no surname, that was proposed three times, denied in New Zealand.

Oh, you've got to have a surname. Have to have a surname. It's like a Barry. Or Lord. Because you don't have to have a middle name, right? No. Because my dad doesn't have a middle in New Zealand. Oh, you've got to have a surname. Have to have a surname. It's like a Barry. Or Lord. Because you don't have to have a middle name, right? No. Because my dad doesn't have a middle name.

No. Oh my God, poor thing. We should give him one. We should work on that. I think it's too late now. I think we'll put it on the list. On the back left element, put that one on the summer.

Yeah. Turn on the extractor fan, we'll keep that one bubbling. Here's some great ones. Sativa and Indica. I knew someone called Sativa and Indica. Indica. So two strains of cannabis.

Yeah. Denied. I'm so sorry, but you shouldn't be having kids. Sativa was proposed three times in New Zealand and denied three times. Ice proposed. Cut. Why was ice proposed then?

No idea. Proposed once in time. Because of what? Slang of... Methamphetamine? Yeah. Methamphetamine? Is that what Australians call it?

Yeah, that's what they call it, yeah. We call it P. My favourite one that was denied and proposed once, Fanny. Why was Fanny there? Fanny is a name. That used to be a popular name, didn't it? I think we've just sort of gone like, that's a bit unfair. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do you know what I mean? Bit of a burden there. Fanny Jane Sproul. Yeah. Fletch Vaughan and Fanny. I wouldn't have got this job. Do you know what I mean? Bit of a bird in there. Fanny Jane Sproul. Yeah. Fletch Vaughan and Fanny. I wouldn't have got this job. Do you know what I mean? No, you would have.

I think you would have. Because Vaughan and I would have loved that name. Fletch Vaughan and Fanny. Yeah. We probably would have gone Fletch, Vag and Fanny just to really. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Call you, shorten yours. Vag up.

Fletch, Vag and Fanny. What's that show? Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Now, you may remember, bring you up to date. If you missed this, producer Carlin received postal confirmation that she had stolen a tank load of petrol from British Petroleum. BP, the known name, is around here. And people messaged in, it's a scam, it's a scam.

It's not. They found her through her car number plate. There's a photo of her filling up with gas. She looks very sad. Miserable. She looks very sad. Oh my God, that photo is confronting. She probably just finished working with us for the day.

It was on the way to working with us. No, no, no. It was after working with us right before our holiday break. Oh yeah. She needed a break. She needed a break.

Yeah. So you get this letter from British Petroleum. Is that what it stands for? Yeah. Wow. Do you ever know that? I thought it was just big petrol.

Same. Same vibe. And they had accused you of stealing how much petrol? $140 and like 56 cents. Which is impossible for your car to acquire. It said I'd bought like 54 litres of fuel. My car takes max 30. Yeah.

So this is wrong. Also, the time that got wrong, obviously the person that did take this fuel was after you. Yeah, so this is wrong. Also, the time that got wrong, obviously the person that did take this fuel was after you? Yeah, I was, my app says I was there at 12.36 and the photo says 12.38. Now I know that that's only two minutes difference, but

it doesn't take you that long to fill the car. So, there was an 0800 number on the letter. Yeah. Because they said if you, what did they say, you've got to pay this? It was like, please go to this website and pay this money or go into your store and pay this money. If you think there's, like, an issue with this, call this number.

Here's the direct, like, button to press. There's an issue. I was like, there's a blimmin' issue here. There's a blimmin' issue. That ain't my petrol. And to be fair, it does say in the letter, like, sometimes mistakes happen with our system, so please call us. So I was like, okay, cool. They're going to be chill about it.

Well, they're British. Like, British are so chill. Yes, very much so, darling. Don't worry about it, darling. That's how the head of BP talks. The lovely petrol, darling. Just don't you worry about it, darling. Well, rude to assume that it's a man, but anyways. It definitely is.

So, actually, you threw me's a man, but anyways. Definitely is. Oh, now Fletch is going. Yep. Murray. Murray, darling. Murray Unscherkloss. Murray Unscherkloss. It's like their bit more like this then. No, he's actually Canadian.

He's a Canadian business executive. Oh, really? And you should have a take a picture on the company. Of BP. I reckon, do you know, I know people that have done this. They just get the company email address and just put in the first dot last name.

Yeah. And they're just trying to email the CEO. Oh my God, it works all the time. Let's go straight to Murray. Yeah, straight to Murray. If they're not going to sort this out. Murray at BP.com. And he's Canadian,

so you know he's going to be polite. Oh, sorry. Oh, lovely to hear from you, E. Sorry. My friendly cousin. Dear New be polite. So sorry. Oh, lovely to hear from you, eh? So sorry. My friendly cousin. Down there in Zealand, eh? So anyways, I finally got around to calling them yesterday because you know what?

Girl needs petrol. And I was worried that they were going to be like, no petrol for you. Because if they blocked your app. No, it says that I have to prepay now. They don't trust it. They don't trust it. You're so untrustful.

The trust is breached. You pull up to the thing and you've got to go in to pay beforehand. And you wave to them. And don't trust it. You're so untrusted. You pull up to the thing and you've got to go in to pay beforehand and you wave to them and they always wave back to me because I'm white and they just let me

fill it up. They feel unthreatened. It's a white male. They're like, oh yeah, look at that. Our racism doesn't extend this far.

Yeah. And they let me go but you know, you're untrusted. It's a pre-plagued. It's like filling up at 11 o'clock at night. What if my picture

is like in their staff room as like someone not to trust? Oh, yeah. Mate, you're in trouble. I hope I've got CCTV footage. You know those photos where you're like, have you seen this person?

Yeah, oh no. Okay, so you ring the number. So I rang the number. I'll be honest, nothing against the woman I spoke to. Blimmin' unhelpful. Nothing against this woman

who was absolutely useless. Wait, was she British too? No. She was Canadian. Oh, awesome.

Oh yeah? Oh, not me. Right, so what, you ring up the number that they've sent you in the letter.

And she's like, I can't help you. And I go, hold on, I haven't fully explained. Because at this point, I'm like, I think that she thinks

that I have done this. Right? Ah, right, okay. And I'm like, no, at this point, I'm like, I think that she thinks that I have done this. Right? Ah, right. Okay. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. Like, here's evidence. Like, my car would not fit that much gas. I have evidence on my app.

I have evidence on my card. Like, the payment came out. This is a slam dunk in court. I've seen a lot of legal TV shows. I'm well willing to represent you. Yeah. Thank you. I have watched Legally Blonde.

Fletcher Smith. Sproul. Legal team. No, I'm well willing to represent you. Yeah. Thank you. I have watched Legally Blind. Fletcher Smith. Sproul. Legal team. No, I'm not. Legally Blonde. Yeah, love that. I'm really deep in this. Okay, anyways.

So she's like, we can't do anything. And I can see on your app. So she gets my app details and she logs into it or something. I don't know. And she's like, I can see that you were there at 12.34. And I'm like, but my app says 12.36 and the photo says 12.38. What is correct?

And she's like, I don't know, so I can't do anything. But you're the number. But you're the number. But he's the number. She's the number. What did she say to do? She was like, so you're just going to have to go back to the store where you got this.

Oh, my God. No, I can't be bothered. They're going to say call the number. There's just going to be someone working there that doesn't get paid enough to care about you and can't even probably help you with your situation. And like, maybe I'm going to need the manager of that store. But then, like, does he have access to the BP system? Rude of you to assume it's a he.

Yeah, rude of you. Women are allowed to manage BPs. Got it. Google it. Google it. Yeah, it's a she. It's a he. Yeah, rude of you. Women are allowed to manage VPs. Got it. Google it. Google it. Yeah, it's a she. It's a she. Wow, Cassandra.

No, that's just Murray in a wig. I'd do it all, eh? Oh, I like to pretend, you know. Okay, so what are you going to do then now? Go in. I guess I'm going to go in today. You're going to go in. I bet they can't help you.

They won't help you. We need a part three. We need a part three tomorrow. You've got to go in today, please. Yeah. My time of working at a petrol station, if you would come in, there is not a single person on staff

that would have been able to help you at any time. I think we go straight to Murray, the head of BP in Canada. Yeah, Murray at BP.com. Wherever they're based. Let's not bother with the New Zealand office. Also, shout out to Caltex. Oh my God.

Who, this morning, Hayley's like, Caltex just followed me on Instagram. I checked, they'd also followed me. Who, this morning Hayley's like, Caltex just followed me on Instagram. I checked, they'd also followed me. Apparently they heard us bagging up BP and

they're like, we'll get in on that. I love that. Bag them. Honestly, you know I've had some good followers in my life. The Wiggles, Chloe

Swarbrick, the Briscoes, Jason Momoa. Caltex felt the big win yesterday. I don't know, I just felt like, man, I'm really making it in life. Okay, well you keep us updated. Just know and tell Caltex felt the big win yesterday. I don't know, I just felt like, man, I'm really making it in life.

Okay, well you keep us updated. Just no one tell Caltex about that time my friend let me fill in hundreds of that entry form to win a year for a guest. Why are you saying that? They're going to unfollow you, bro. No one tell Caltex. I was not part of that. Statute of limitations. It was over 20 years ago. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley.

Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. This week on Shorty Street, 33 years after the pilot episode, Bronte Bell, who was the baby born in that episode, is going to be on the show. 33 years later. The first ever Shortland Street baby.

Isn't that cool? So she was in the pilot episode, born as a baby. Everyone was like, baby, hospital, hospital. And they used a real baby. They used a real baby. Yeah, yeah. And they smeared her in blood and all this kind of stuff. And this week, she's coming out.

What is she? She's a nurse. Oh, she's going to be a nurse. Yeah, yeah. Looking at her. There she is. She's got a lanyard on and some scrubs. Where's baby was she in the original Shoreland Street back in the day?

I always wonder when you see an actual baby, like a little baby on a TV show, you're like, how did they get that baby? Were they just put an ad somewhere online and they're like, we need a tiny baby. Have you just had one? Yeah. Bring it to the set. I had twins once in an ad for Anki Yogurt.

And I remember multiple sets of twins turned up, twin babies. Yeah. And they were trying to like match them to me. They were like, these ones are a bit brown or these ones are too white. Yeah, these are a bit orange or they're a bit orange and we wouldn't buy that from you. And then they were like, these babies will do. And then all the other babies went away.

And I was like, okay, thank you. I've got the story of the work. She was the baby. It was the first episode of Shortland Street. Hone Ropata had just arrived. Dr. Ropata. From Guatemala? Yep, from Guatemala.

Okay, yeah. And this may have even been what coined the phrase, you're not in Guatemala now, Dr. Ropata. From Guatemala? Yep, from Guatemala. And this may have even been what coined the phrase, you're not in Guatemala now, Dr. Ropata, because against hospital protocol, he said we've got to deliver this baby. This woman was in a car accident. Oh, no. She arrives.

We're going to get more big names involved here. She, well, Stuart Nielsen, Martin Henderson. Yeah. Believes he is the father, but it wasn't him. It was his dastardly Brothers baby Of course it was And it introduced us

To all of the All of the you know Characters that we got to know Back in the day Wow So she was born And now she's back on the show 33 years later

We were talking about this And Shannon said Well I was a star When I was younger Yeah it was a big deal What were you? So my mum and I Were walking through farmers

When I was a kid and this person comes over and he's like stop it I see star potential come to this changing room

and I'll give you a $50 voucher and we will measure you and you'll become a mannequin for farmers and then they took some photos

and I became a mannequin oh my god. Perfect body type. What do you mean? They moulded. Yeah. I would have thought they would have just used like chat GPT. I guess this was like 2000s. But they take the measurements from real people

and I was like seven-ish and they were like that's a good seven-year-old and I became a mannequin. Do you know who doesn't take the measurements from real people? Be careful. That's not true. You know who doesn't take the measurements from real people? Bevel text. True. Sorry, that is not made for humans. Do you know who doesn't

take the measurements from random children in the playground? Farmers. Farmers. I'm serious. My mum will verify over text.

I know she's listening. I think you were both tricked. I'm not saying I think it happened. He had a voucher. Yeah, I could get a voucher. He had a voucher. Give me

after the show give me 30 minutes so I can get the farmers and back and have a voucher. Yeah, I could get a voucher. He had a voucher. After the show, give me 30 minutes so I could get to Farmer's and back and have a voucher. No, I'm serious. It was legit. Right, okay. Wait, did you see a Farmer's business card or any kind of business card? I'm sure my mum verified it. She wouldn't let a stranger measure me, I'm sure. I don't know.

It sounds like she might have. It was legit. to measure me I'm sure I don't know it sounds like she might have it was I went to school with a girl who has she was Maori but had this amazing curly ginger hair

and she was just like incredible looking and she was always in ads and I remember one of them was for Telecom or for Clear maybe

or Telecom like one of the phone companies and it was her at her birthday party with all this birthday party set up and no one came and her waiting by the phone.

And I remember at school everyone being like, oh, Christabel, no one came to your party. Oh, no. Joke was on all of you because Christabel would have made a lot of money from that and probably didn't have to pay for uni. Yeah, totally. I don't know.

She's still kicking about in the Eastbourne scene. The Eastbourne scene? I don't think Eastbourne has a scene. Eastbourne's got one hell of a scene. It doesn't have a scene. This is what we want to ask this morning. 0800 Dials at M 9696. Did you star in something as a kid?

Was it an ad for something? Were you on a TV ad? On the side of a bus. Magazine ad? Yeah. Anything like that? I don't know. Were you in?

You could have just been the face of a child for like a child's health campaign. Yeah. Were you a Huggies kid? Oh, wow. You were the pull-ups kid. Fancy. So we'll take anything at this stage

because you hear about people who just get stock imagery done and then they're the face of herpes in Spain or something. Yeah, and you're like, hey. Okay, 0800 1000 M is the number. You can text through 9696. Did you star in something as a kid? The first ever baby on Shorten Street who was born in the pilot

is returning this week to the show as a nurse. And so we wanted to know, did you star in something as a kid? Maybe you were the face of a brand or like Shannon, someone approached you to be the measurements of a model. Alicia, good morning. Good morning, guys. How's it going? Really good. You were a child model.

I was. So do you remember the drink Zap? Yes. Do I remember Zap? Milk. Yeah, we were never allowed it. It was the forbidden fruit. do you remember the drink Zap? Yes. Do I remember Zap? Milk. Milk. They were allowed it. Like flavoured milk.

It was the forbidden fruit. And then it turned into something else, eh? Primo. Primo. Primo. Yeah, it turned into Primo. Some garbage. Yeah. Okay.

I was the strawberry. So they'd done an ad and we were all dressed as like half human, half space cadets. I don't know. I had tinfoil in my hair because that was really spacey. It played in like all the movie cinemas and stuff. And I was very young, like 12 or something. And they had to get permission to play it.

But they continued to play it. And I kept getting checks for like $800. And as a 12-year-old, I was like a millionaire. Yeah. Yeah. And that was going to be my question. Did your parents keep the money or you just got it and was like a millionaire. Yeah. That was going to be my question. Did your parents

keep the money or you just got it and spent it? No, no. I definitely had my own account. There was lots of cash in there

so it was a great time. My Nana got me into it. My best friend and I I mean we're 41 now we've been friends since we were three. We modelled together and we were known

as the vanilla and the chocolate girl because I needed a white girl and a brown girl. Which is, when you think about it for the day, very diverse. Very diverse. Very progressive for the day. We end up having nearly three months off school at one stage because we got

so good at the modelling for farmers and Decker and Rendles and Deer. Rendles. Yeah. Oh, my God. Back to the farmers. Was the guy there that measured Shannon. When you got recruited for farmers modelling, was it in a playground and he did measurements behind the public toilet?

What's the vibe there? Because we've just. Behind the public toilet. It's a bit worrying. Yeah. It is. We heard from Shannon's mum, Bev. There's two Bev's on the show.

Fletcher's Bev and Shannon's Bev. And Bev said, look, it's true. And Shannon said, they don't believe me. That's definitely concerning. I obviously went through an agency. Yeah. That's why Shannon said, mum, how did you prove they were legit? And she said, no, it was random.

Why not? Easy voucher. Easy voucher. Good times. It was good times. It was different times. Thank you, Alicia. She's getting $800 every three months on a rollover,

and Shannon's getting a one-off $50 voucher. Hazel, you were an actor at school? Yeah, so it was really random, but this guy turned up at our school and asked for two volunteers for a radio ad for St. Peter's College in Cambridge. Now, we lived nowhere near St. Peter's. Okay.

So you just had to pretend to be from there? Yeah, and I had to be like, hi, I'm Lucy and I love the sushi at St. Peter's. Really great, actually. That was actually really good. That was really good. That was really great. I didn't even know St. Peter's had sushi.

My children will be transferring schools immediately. I'm pretty sure you'd pay for the sushi. I absolutely can't afford St. Peter's had sushi. My children will be transferring schools immediately. I'm pretty sure you'd pay for the sushi. I absolutely can't afford St. Peter's. That's a funny joke. Hazel, thank you. Zach, what did you star in as a kid? I actually was in a movie directed by Margaret Mahie. So Typhon's People.

Oh! Imagine there in Margaret Mahie, who the playground's named after. Yeah. What was the movie called? Typhons People. It was kind of about created children and incubators and stuff like that. So we were the, myself and two other kids were the incubator babies. What was it?

There was another movie that I know so many. You were a baby when you were in the Zag? No, no, sorry. I was about seven or eight. Oh, okay. Have you still got the movie anywhere saved on DVD or tape? Mum recently gave it to me on VHS, and I was like, cool, Mum.

Thanks, Mum. Mum, maybe digitise it next time before you give it to me. Yeah, thanks, Mum. There was another movie. I know so many people that were in the, was it Bridge to Terabithia? Yes, so many of my friends were in Bridge to Terabithia. So many, like everyone you meet it's like, I was in that. It's like you were just in a

background in a classroom scene. Yeah, it was like, um, Lord of the Rings battle scenes. Oh yeah. In early 2000s. I was in Lord of the Rings, it's like, in which one? Yeah. I'm actually looking at Typhon's people right now, 1993, after David Typhon a brilliant scientist

has killed a group of parties go to a secret lab located in New Zealand trying to find out the hidden truth of some rumoured experiments he did

on humans. Ooh. I can't see Zach on IMDb. Is he not on IMDb? Is he not on IMDb? It's embarrassing. Some messages in.

Wow, so many. My daughter at three years old was in an episode of Xena. Oh. I was in the background of a Hercules episode running from a giant chicken. Did they just have you run away from the chicken at distance but hold the chicken up close to the camera? Maybe for that forced perspective thing.

I think so. Very Petty Jackson of you. Very Petty Jackson. I went to school with the female Atta Peanut Butternutter. I looked so much like the kid. I just told people I was that kid. Did you?

Yeah. People would stop my mum in the supermarket and be like, is this the child from the ad? Mum would be like, no. And she'd walk away and be like, yes, I am.

She's embarrassed of me. Have we heard from the She's more of a jam person. Milky Bar kid? She's more of a My mum loves jam. She's allergic to butter. Is the Milky Bar kid text in or is he not of a jam person. Milky Bar kid? She's more of a... My mum loves jam. She's allergic to banana. Is the Milky Bar kid text in or is he not?

No, no, Milky Bar kid. No Milky Bar. I was in ads. I was in farm-baked cookies ad. Oh my God. I ate my fair share of farm-baked cookies. Do you remember the banana ones they did? Banana chocolate.

They were the best. They don't do them anymore. They slapped. Was it real banana flavour? I don't know if it had real banana flavour. I assume. Yeah. Cadbury Griffin's chocolate chip biscuits ad for

overseas was in a German washing powder ad. A German washing powder ad? Yeah. Again, I feel like you've got to check some of these things. Check? I know! I was the person in the kids book from the 1990s called Surfing the Internet. The book was showed to

show kids how to use the internet. The photos were taken at my school library. So I could choose which friends were in some random photos. And now how the tables have turned, we're trying to get them off the internet. Yeah, exactly. I was the face of a sausage roll company in the 90s. I suppose.

Did you get saucy rolls? Get paid in saucy rolls? Yes. I was supposed to be on a Canterbury Take a Kid to Footy poster. But they then were like, can we use your face on sausage rolls instead Yes. I was supposed to be on a Canterbury take a kid to footy poster but they then were like can we use your face on sausage rolls instead? My face was in the frozen aisles until I was 18

and my nickname was Sauce all through high school. Sauce! They're going to find us the photo. Oh my god, please tell me you got paid well for that.

Like you're the image of a product. You do, yeah. I know, right? And when it's kids like non-active kids and the parents don't know the company would just

take the piss right and be like 500 bucks yeah parents would be like stoked I was on a full page ad in the listener for Telecom a seven

I was chosen because I did ballet I was in red bands in a swanny but holding a fence doing some ballet moves oh okay what are you working

for Telecom is that like rural rural phones or something don't know we've got phones in the country something don't know we've got phones in the country now you guys like phones we've got phones

yeah a good friend of mine was the baby in the Anne Getty's baby book as well as there was a Celine Dion book

with her holding a baby and she was one of the babies in that book wow yeah oh she passed away at the age of 19 but she was photographed

for lots of books and magazines, so it kind of lives on. Oh, nice. And you'll still see it pop up every now and then. Oh. When I was a kid, I won a national colouring competition. It was displayed at the downtown shopping centre. My photo was taken and I was featured in the Times newspaper

next to Lorraine Downs, who was Miss Universe. Wow. Look at you. That's a claim to fame. That's a claim to fame. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.

All right, yesterday, it's owl week here at Factory Day. Sí, papi. Sí, papi. Yesterday, that's what a Spanish owl says. Sí, papi. Sí, papi. Sí, papi. Yesterday, we learned about the silent flight of owls.

Today, we're learning about owls' ears. Okay. Vorn. They don't have ears. They don't have ears. Vorn, they don't have ears. I think we're about to find out they do. They don't have ears. They don't have ears. Vaughan, they don't have ears. I think we're about to find out they do.

They have ears. They have ears. Do they have weird Voldemort holes? They have slits. I don't like it. I don't like it. Many owl species including barn owls and long-eared owls. Long-eared owls, you might be thinking, do they have long ears? No, they've just got a feather formation that looks a bit like an owl.

Oh, yeah, I love those. Yeah, they're cool looking owls. Looks like Jim Carrey. They look more like horns. Yeah. It looks like Jim Carrey. You know, in Ace Ventura. Ace Ventura always has ears like that.

Yeah. Niche reference, but I appreciate it. So barn owls and long-eared owls have ears that are slits on the side of their head. They're asymmetrically placed. So one ear is higher than the other. That's dumb. And no, it's because that allows them

to detect the vertical position of sound as well as its direction. Because if the one ear is higher than the other, I hear it in the middle of the top ear and the very top of the,

sorry, the middle of the right ear and the very top of the left, that means it's there. Oh, they know. That's, they're using Pythagoras. They're using theorem. Pythagoras is triangulation. The theorem. They're triangulating. That means they's there. Oh, they know. They're using Pythagoras. They're using theorem.

The triangle thing. Pythagoras' triangulation. The theorem. They're triangulating. That means they can pinpoint prey by sound alone, even in complete darkness, without using their eyes, which are already great in the dark.

Wow, they are pretty good. Watch out if you're a mouse. Oh, dude, if you're a mouse. If you're a mouse, you are screwed. Dude, if you're a mouse, you better have a little mouse car to drive in real fast. And it better be a sports car. This is what you need on your... You know you need a hard roof

because if you're driving your mouse convertible and you're just like, I've got to get from point A to point B, it's dark. You don't want to be on the North Western driving along listening to Chapel Road on ZM and you just get plucked out of the sky by an owl because the owl

will hear it coming it would have triangulated your mouse convertible using Pythagoras theorem he will know exactly where you are swoop down

but also I think even if you're a mouse in a mouse sized car the owl will just pick up the whole car so you think you need to be a mouse in a human sized car

I think you need to be a mouse in a human sized car with long petals long petal to be a mouse in a human-sized car. With long pedals. Long pedal extension sticks. To escape the owl. But again, if you're stuck in traffic, keep your windows up. Yeah.

Oh my God, windows up. Aircon on. Aircon on. Yeah, you're a mouse. You deserve aircon. Yeah. Even if the petrol tank is low, it's fine. It's actually not using that much.

And you're driving home as quick as you can because Stuart Little's on TV too and you still watch traditional television because you're a mouse. Because you're a mouse. You love. How are you going to pay for Netflix? Yeah. You're a mouse. You're a mouse critic.

Yeah, and you spent all your money on a human-sized car with long pedals. Yeah. You've got to get out of there, mouse. Those extensions weren't cheap. They weren't cheap. They were custom 3D printed. Well, they had to be made of carbon fibre too to be light because you're a mouse, dude. You don't have the quad strength.

You don't have the strength to push the pedals unless they're very light. Stupid mouse. Owl ears actually quite, as far as mice go, pretty smart. Yeah. Worked out how to drive. Yeah. Owl ears aren't visible.

They're hidden beneath the facial disc, so it's like a slip. So you know the big eyes and they're kind of like concave? The slits are on the out. The sound hits it and it acts like a satellite dish and it funnels the sound to the ear. Hits the eyes? Yeah. Oh. Around the eyes. Oh, that's loud. And directs into the ears. Amazing. And they've got

muscles, meaning they can like focus in that disc on different... Like a moving... Like a moving eyes, baby. Yeah. They've got ears. Great ears as well. And that is another reason we talked about yesterday how silently they fly is when they're flying, they can be addressing the satellite dish on the fly.

Yeah, because they're doing Pythagoras' theorem. Yeah. So they can... The wide process differences in sound arrival time, it's estimated 20 millionths of a second between the ears so they can tell exactly where something is because it's getting to something closer. 20 millionths of a second.

They sort of build an acoustic map, if you like. You know, like sonar. Or Daredevil, the blind superhero. Yes, of course. That mouse in the convertible has no chance. Dude, no chance. Dude. No chance. No chance at all. It was up against an apex bird predator.

No. So today's fact of the day is owls, not only eyes, also really good ears. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Someone's just messaged in. They once, in a biological university paper, came across a study where they taught rats how to drive little cars and the rats really enjoyed it. Oh, God. The parts of their brain that registered pleasure shot up.

But did they have pedal extensions? No, no, they just taught them to drive little cars. No, we need to get them into the big cars and we're staying away. But also, you know why the rats were happy? They were the only ones

driving on the road. There was no traffic. Now get them in Auckland's congested traffic by being with rats. Moody in seconds. Dude, the serotonin's

going to dip. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. He's been given a new energy, hasn't he, Vaughan? So what happened here? So I've got...

The guy kind of tuned out and came back and Fletch has got a weird rat's tail fringe. So I've got hair extensions, right? The little like K-tip hair extensions and they're at the point where they need to get replaced

and so there's these little ones that are like hanging down low that were hanging on by like one hair and I was like, I've got to get it off. And so I was like, this looks really weird. I'm going to pull it off.

Well, can I have one? I don't know if I've got any other loosies. Keep pulling out your hair, Hayley. Yeah, I was like, this looks really weird. I'm going to pull it off. Can I have one? I don't know if I've got any other loosies. Keep pulling out your hair, Hayley. I don't have much left. We're the entertainment of two bald men. No.

It's nice. It's really annoying to have hair now. That'd be horrible. It's in my face. I'm like. Literally, if you can picture

these hair extensions, it's like a tiny little strand. You look cute. Thanks. Thanks. Can you leave it there, please? Yeah, absolutely. Anyway,

anyway, so yesterday I opened up, I can't, I opened up this app that I am on and it's

What, like Trade Me or something? Not, yeah, similar to Trade Me. Okay. Is it a banking app? Is it a banking app? Banking app. I can't say what app it is.

Oh, is it like Maps or something? I can't say the app. Is it the Air New Zealand app? No, it's not Air New Zealand. Is it Telegram? No, it's not that. Is it a game or something? Yeah, like a game.

Okay. Okay. Okay? Like a game. I can't say. It may be for a podcast. Okay. So I can't get into the details of it.

Okay? That's cool. Anyway, that aside, I open up this app and... Is your hair getting in your face, babe? Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's cool. Okay? That's cool. Anyway, that aside, I open up this app and... Is your hair getting in your face, babe? Yeah, it is. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's all right.

I open up this app and I'm told that my account has been banned. Like, banned. Not like your account, you can't log in or something's different. Your account's been banned. Oh, no. And I was like, what? I'm not, like, on this thing. I haven't done anything.

So I went into the support area and I said to them like, hey, my account's been banned and I don't think that I've warranted it. Yeah. What can we do? And then Dean actually from support came back and said, hey, bans happen. And it doesn't mean you've done something wrong. But we're on the side of caution to restore your profile.

I need to confirm that your identity matches who you say you are. Swastikas, is it? Yeah, that's what it is. It's an underground Nazi community. That's why I didn't want to say it on air. No, you wouldn't get banned. You wouldn't get banned from the underground Nazi community.

I had the wrong way around. The Buddhist ones. Yeah, it was your Buddhist map. So, please, we need to know that you are who you say you are. So, your was your Buddhist app. So please, we need to know that you are who you say you are. So your photos. Your photos. Wait, has someone seen your photos on this app and reported you because they think you're

catfishing people? She's too hot. I've gotten hotter too. You're too hot. Yeah, maybe that'll be it. She's not that hot and I'll be like, no, I've actually been hotter. Or they've seen you from the Bake Off show and they're like, there's no way she'd be on this app. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right. No, it's not that. It's not that kind of thing. The Buddhist app. No, yeah, the Buddhist app. Anyway,

this is the request that they send to verify my identity. Okay. Please send me a photo of yourself holding a book in your left hand and closing the opposite eye. That will help me match them up. Oh my God, what a horrible photo to take.

You just look like this. So I was like, they're so weirdly specific. It's not like send a photo of your ID or something like that. Yeah, that's a kink, eh? Yeah. The old book in one hand, eye shut in the other. No, but I guess it is something that you wouldn't have a photo of, so that's why they're asking you, right?

And you wouldn't have a photo of it, and you're not a robot. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. So then I'm like, I was in this rehearsal space yesterday, I'm walking around. No books. What about a pamphlet? Can I ask for a pamphlet, man? Can I ask for a book? I found the Higher Spaces Accident, Incident, and Near

Miss Report sort of clipboard. Dude, what is going on? That's the weirdest photo. That's the weirdest photo ever. And then I just winked my opposite eye. You look like you're holding up the incident report because you've got splashed in the eye with acid

and it's an OSH regulation. You had to have proved that you read this. You read the incident report, but you chose to splash the acid around anyway. I know, it's so stupid. And I feel like such a dick. Did they accept it, even though it was a clipboard and not a book? I sent it off raw dog, no explanation.

Not saying, sorry about the clipboard. Yeah. And then I got the message, thank you, I've unbanned your profile. Please let me know if I can help with anything else. The initial ban was that they thought. It was just a mistake. Right. Oh.

I know. But now some company has a photo of me looking honestly worst for wear holding up an accident report thing with a clipboard

and like winking with the other hand and not giving any effort. So that's a photo I don't want leaked. Leaked? Leak anything else. Leak the nudes.

Leak the nudes. Leaked the nudes. The nudes. Go forth. Not the winky clipboard photo. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. It's Mother's Day on Sunday. Yeah.

Get out there and get your mum, whatever your mum likes. Well, you're going to go visit my mum, aren't you? Yeah, I'm going to go see your mum because I'm going to be in your town. In your hood. Taking my mum back to see the old family farm. Will you take your mum to meet my mum? Have our mums ever met?

That might be a mum potion. Yeah, we're made mum. 21 years and your mum's ever met. No, I don't think so. I don't think they've ever met. I don't think they've met. It's best two women of that kind of just kept apart. Do you know that Fletch gave my mum a very nice warm hug on the weekend?

Did he? Yeah. I was quite pissed. Oh, yeah. She said to me. Did he get a bit handsy? No, do you know what my mum said to me? Was Shannon pissed?

And I said, I don't know. And I said, I don't think so. I think Fletch was. She was like, oh, Shannon. She said, I've never met her properly before. And then I said hello. And then she just started talking at me like a million miles an hour about something crazy. Weird, because Shannon said to me, was Hayley's mum pissed?

No, Patsy was pissed. That's a given with the Sprouts. No, I had one. I was a good girl. I think my mum was... I think I just come across like I've had a few. Yeah. I'm quite a lot. No, I said, no, I was a good girl. No, I know. I think my mum was... I think I just come across like I've had a few. Yeah. I'm quite a lot.

No, I said no, Fletch was drunk and she was like... Mother's Day... She got a squeeze from Fletch and I didn't even get one. Wow. His mother's not getting a squeeze on Mother's Day. But maybe he thinks the Chemist Warehouse said I had to spoil mum with Ariana Grande's Cloud Pink 100ml for $74.99. I've been reading these out all morning.

That's enough. That's a freebie. That's a freebie for the show sponsor for the Chemist Warehouse. Who knows me? Well, itml for $74.99. I've been reading these out all morning. That's enough. That's a freebie. That's a freebie for the show sponsor, for the Chemist Warehouse. Who knows me? Well, it's Mother's Day. Are you trying to get some Omega-3 pills? For free.

For free or something? I'll take Omega-3. I won't say no to beneficial oil. Which is the good Omega? Three. What about six? No, that's good too. Is there nine?

I don't know. For nine? I don't know. Well, I'll try coming back, get it out. Nine! no better Omega but you know you write your mother some lovely words

because you know she's your mum that's what I'll always from the heart yeah from the heart and this morning it's come to our attention that Georgia Burt

was using chat GPT because she doesn't know how to speak to her own mother correction I was actually using Google. Chat GPT, I'm not in that space yet. So you Google heartfelt Mother's Day card message. No, you don't.

You just go, what to write in a Mother's Day card. And then go, heartfelt. Just stuff about your mum. Heartfelt things about your mum. No, but they come up. What does it say? You hold such a special place in my heart. Oh my God, my mum would be like, what the hell?

You've always supported me from the first, it's great, it's so good and then you add a little and then you just add in bits like, thanks for everything you've done for us. Right, yeah, they love a bit of that. Look, I can do it for workmates, what to write in a birthday card for a workmate, wishing you a great birthday and a memorable year, you know you can do it for everything. If someone wrote to me

wishing you a great birthday and a memorable year, I'd be like this is really from the heart, Georgia. Weddings are the worst, though. They're great. It's great. Actually, I learned it from my mother-in-law. She's got a book

and it's literally card starters and it's what to write in for like any occasion. She's got a book called card starters? Yeah, and it's got what to write for any occasion. Guys, this is amazing. So my mother-in-law

has just taught me a great thing that I'm using on her. Shut your laptop. What does it say to say if you've just lost all of your family in an avalanche in the Swiss Alps? Hang in there. No, don't say hang in there because I could

have hung for a while. Hey, this snow business like show business. I don't reckon puns hon. I think I need to laugh. I think I need to laugh. If we don't laugh, we cry. I think I need to laugh. I am sorry for your loss. Wow, so good Georgia. From the heart. I am sorry for your loss. Wow. So good, Georgia.

From the heart. That was really from the heart. No, hang on. I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you now more than ever. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time. Wow, okay. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time. I hate it.

I hate it. Can you say something heartfelt about your mother? To close the laptop, say something heartfelt about your mother for Mother's Day. She is beautiful. she's youthful she's a lovely mum she's keeping it tight she raised this old bitty so that's great

she is keeping it tight and she's in a bit of pain at the moment so I wish the pain would go away there you go I'm not going to put that in a card

because then the year goes by she'll be like oh that time last year when I was in pain that's nice I'm going to say to my mum to whom it may concern.

Who does blessings upon this Mother's Day? You get to have lunch cards. I always said your family was a force of nature. I just didn't think Mother Nature would take it so literally. I love you but I'm here for you if you always want to cry or curse at the sky. That's a chat

GPT recommendation. That's really good. So chat GPT delivery. Well, this officially wins for the worst family vacation ever. That is brutal. What if you said, Vaughan, I heard what happened to your family. Should we have a dinner or have a lunch? Is that the podcast done? Because I'm busting for a poos.

Busting for a poos. Jesus. Give us a review.