ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - May 7th, 2025

Episode Date: May 6, 2025

RIP Skype Top 6 Other things under 16s should be banned from Whatsapp Hi Mum scam SLP - Can you change a tyre? Most dangerous sport Shannon's Hack Asking AI to make us hotter Sean Mandell's Met Gala review Morgan Penn Sex.Life Podcast Let's choose Hayley's walk on music Hayley bra recommendations Fact of the Day Are members of the public mean to you in your job?  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years in the 1970s, the Mr. Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of plague. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Clark would have threatened him. Go and kill him. If you don't, I'm going to kill you and your wife and your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your son. This is Mr. Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. From the ZM Podcast Network,

this is Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley's Big Pod. Thanks to Animates. Making happy happen for pets. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Thank you Brenna for Rundkin. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hay. Thank you, Brinnifer Rundkin. Welcome to the show, Fletch Vaughan and Haley.

It's two minutes past six. I think we should chuck this up on socials. I reckon I've taken potentially the most masked photo of my boys Fletch and Vaughan at Brekkie the other day. Well, feel free to. I'm surprised that you didn't story this, to be honest. Yeah, it deserves a story, eh? At least a story.

I'm almost feeling grid. Oh, wow, okay. No, I've got plans for the grid. No, it deserves a story, eh? At least a story. I'm almost feeling grid. Oh, wow. Okay. No, I've got plans for the grid. No, it's not grid. Have you got kind of a grid scheme? I've got a grid scheme. Hayley's had a photo come through

from the gala at the weekend. Oh, it's so good. It's so good. Probably the best grid photo of the year. Yeah, that's grid. That's grid. That's solo grid. Yeah.

But you guys will get a story. Your friends relegated to a story. Yeah. That's fine. Do you like this photo of me post-Wellington Gala? Shocked in an alleyway? Hauling a piano? Don't share that one.

Okay. Now, on the show today, 8 o'clock, we'll have Add to Cart return. So make sure you're listening after the news at 8 o'clock for your chance to win some cool stuff, all thanks to One Roof Property. I want to say the cool stuff for the house. The last thing we're doing on the show today is talking about near-death experiences. That's the last thing we're

going to do on the show today. Give them the long teeth. Oh yeah, okay, great. The long teeth. I just wanted to circle back. Hang on to Add to Cart today. The girlies are going to fly. There's a bit of you. I walked past a display of this in a store yesterday

and I was like Hayley would buy all of this. I still don't have one. They did a Star Wars collab. Yeah they did. A few years ago that was cool.

Make sure you're listening for Add to Cart at 8 o'clock. Morgan Penn, sexologist is in after 7 this morning. Exciting announcement. Yeah.

I wonder what it could be. What could it be? You and Morgan host Sex.Life the podcast. Yeah. And everybody's been waiting for season three. Where's season three? Well, why would Morgan be coming in to talk about May 28th? Hmm. Don't know. It's just a date.

May the 28th be with you, by the way. Almost works. Almost works. Almost. The top six is coming up soon. Yes, National have put forward a bill to ban under-16s from social media. As someone with two under-16s, they were appalled at this news. I bet.

I bet they were. You could have told me at 16 what to do. This is exactly what Australia's done. Yeah, pretty much following Australia's lead in the old banning kids from social media. I thought the top six other things under-16s should be banned from. Next on the show, though, we talked about this a few months ago. Well, the day has finally arrived. It's the end of an era.

Next. Play ZM's Fleshborn and Hayley. It's the end of an era. We spoke about this a couple of months ago. Skype has shut down. I'm just trying to find the Skype remix. Remember how we had the Skype dance remix last time? It's in the chat, babes.

It's in the chat. Yeah, I'm opening that. That link does nay want to open on my computer. Yeah, me too, actually. I don't know. It's a dodgy link. I think it's... You have a YouTube search while we talk about it.

Yeah, I have a little YouTube, Loxie. Skype, just for some history, purchased by Microsoft in 2011. It was the pioneer in making calls using the internet instead of landlines. My mum still calls. There it is. Wait, is this the fun remix we played? No, this is just the call. No, this is the remix.

Yes. My mum still calls video calling Skype. I'll give you Skype later. Well, it became a verb, didn't it? It did, it became the verb. It became that thing, I'll Skype you later. But now I feel like Zoom's kind of taken that over. Or FaceTime.

Or FaceTime, yeah. Oh my God, yes. So Microsoft took their decision to shut it down. They did give some warning and yeah, officially yesterday pulled the plug. What was the death of it? COVID, right? Yes, and also Microsoft Teams.

Oh, yeah, of course. It's the professional. it? COVID, right? Yes, and also Microsoft Teams. Oh, yeah, of course. As the professional. Yeah. So they want to stream, their thing is they want to streamline because there are competitors like Zoom and FaceTime. Right. So Skype's gone. Mate. You know, we'll always have the memories. Thanks for

the memories. Yeah. You know? It was never really a naughty call. You never did your naughty calls on. FaceTime's the naughty call. Yeah, but what about before FaceTime? Oh, hello. He's got a grin on his face. Have you done some nerdy Skype?

It's a video thing, isn't it? Have you never? What was the thing? What was the chat roulette? I see who. Oh, chat roulette. Omega? Is that called Omegle now?

Don't know. Yes, yes, yes, said the Gen Z's behind you. Just confirming if the Gen Z's Omegle. You're right. God Yes, yes, yes, said the Gen Zs behind you. Just confirming if the Gen Zs are Omegle. You're right. God, this is a banger, eh? We should go out. We should go out. Like, if you were in Declarer and this came on,

you're telling me we're not getting down? Oh, yeah. That's great. It's a great remix. Well, thanks, yeah, thank you, Skype, for connecting us over the years. Gone now, gone but not forgotten How many thousands of mums held up their cat

on Skype? Do you want to say hello to Muz? Do you want to say hello? Say hi to your father Say hi to Ginger Say hi to Ginger Oh God Are we still talking to the cat?

Right, the cat is Ginger Yeah A lot of cats just named after whatever colour they are, right? Oh, God. Is Ginger, are we still talking to the cat? The cat. Right, the cat is Ginger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of cats just named after whatever colour they are, right? Yeah, pretty much. Blackie. We had a Blackie.

Blackie. Yeah. Ginger. Mine was kind of named after the colour because my cat growing up, as you remember, I called it Shaq. And when my mum asked me why I wanted to call it Shaq, I said because Shaquille O'Neal is black and so is the cat. And my mum went, oh.

I said, you told me I could name him. And it was a girl. Even then that was problematic. She recognised that that was problematic. The top six is next on the show. Are the top six other things that under 16 should be banned from? This is just the next song after the Skype remix on YouTube. No, it's not as good.

It's not, it's really, yeah. It's a real downer. It's a really quite picturesque video, though. It's kind of like, I think it's an ambient situation. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Hayley. From the unmoderated comment section, this is the top

six. Well, howdy there, folks. Howdy. Howdy. National have put forward a bill to parliament where under-16s will be banned from social media. This is basically following Australia's situation. Which can't be working

because my niece who turned 14 yesterday is on social media. She messages me on social media. She lives in Australia. So she's somehow found a loophole or a VPN. I don't know. If anyone can find a loophole, it's a teenager. Also, if we're honest about it, we should all be banned from social media.

Oh, pull the plug. Pull the plug. I mean, we should pull the plug, to be honest. Pull the plug. Apart from funny reels and TikToks. Apart from those. Pull the plug except for the FVH private chat on Instagram. Yes.

Because that's funny. And if we've shared one of your reels, you're allowed to keep making content. Yes. Yes. Although this morning, apparently, ACT are not going to support it, so they would have to need support from Labour to pass it in Parliament. Why aren't ACT supporting it? I don't know, man.

Why are ACT doing a lot of things, you know? We stay apolitical on this show, but I'll ask questions. Yeah. And you're free to ask them. Yeah. Well, I've got the top six other things under 16 should be banned from. Do you think they should be banned? You're the one here

with two under 16. I think it should be. I think that's why it acts against it, because they said the cost and the logistics of policing it will be next level. Yeah, right. And it will be. A whole lot of things are going to be put into place. As I said, there's ways around it in Australia and if anyone's going to figure that out, it's kids. Yeah. God, right. And it will be. There's a whole lot of things that are going to be put into place. As I said, there's ways around it in Australia,

and if anyone's going to figure that out, it's kids. Yeah. God, yeah. You tell them to not do something. I don't know. I think I don't – police is a hard word, but I do check what my kids are doing on their socials. Yeah.

Like Snapchat and stuff. I'm like, show me all the friends, and do we know everybody personally, and we're not sending anybody photos of anything. Mate, when people used to message me in a chat room saying ASL and I said 18 female Wellington, I was not an 18-year-old female in Wellington. But you were a female from Wellington. Or you could end up getting measured in the farmer's changing room

by a weird man. No, it was a public toilet. That's the worst case scenario. Measuring a public toilet by a weird man and getting a farmer's voucher. Oh, God. Just's the worst case scenario. Me drinking a public toilet is why we admitted to getting a farmer's voucher. Oh, God. Just be careful online, kids. I've got the top six other things

under 16 should be banned from. Number six on the list, online video games. Because on the very, very, very, very, very rare occasion these days that I get to play video games, I don't like losing to children. Yeah, and then they mock you.

Yeah. It's embarrassing. When you can hear them, that's why I stopped. What's the, is it Call of Duty? There's proximity embarrassing When you can hear them That's why I stopped What's the It's a call of duty This proximity chat You can hear what other people are saying

That's horrible That's mean Yeah because they're A little mean to you Hey I gotcha Gotcha old man Gotcha who are you Void anonymous

What does that even mean Bet you're an old boomer Oh and you are And you are And then I put on the voice I'm like no I'm just a little kid My mum just died That's what I say sometimes.

Wow, sympathy. Don't bully me, my mum just died. I'm just a little guy. That's crazy. It's dark, man. It's crazy. Why don't you go to the pub with some real friends? Do you know what I mean?

Grow up. Number five on the list of the top six other places 16-year-olds, under 16, should be bad from? The pub. They shouldn't be at the pub. What are they doing at the pub? I mean, I've banned from the pub they shouldn't be at the pub what are they doing at the pub

I mean I've been to the pub with your kids before what are you going to do leave them at home yeah oh yeah leave them in the car

with some chips and a lighter in case it gets dark and they need to yeah start a fire to stay warm number four

on the list of the top six other places and things under 16 should be banned from the mall again I don't know

I go to the mall I very rarely go to the mall but when I go to the mall. I very rarely go to the mall. But when I go to the mall, they're bloody everywhere. They're crawling, aren't they? Oh, my God. And how do they get the money? Yeah.

How do they get the money? I was at the mall the other day and there were all these kids and they had like shopping bags everywhere. I know. And I was like, where do you get the money? Where's the money? Oh, yeah, your after school job. Where's that coming from?

Yeah, no, that's bullshit. That's bullshit. We used to go to the mall with like 20 bucka and they had to cover your food, your bus there and back, your movies, your snacks for the movies. No more money. That $20 note, that's the day. Yeah, $20 was what Christine would give me for a day and Hamilton should drop me off at the bus stop.

The bus to Hamilton and back from Morrinsville, I think it was $4. You see, now that's probably going to gobble up all that $20. Yeah, you're barely getting there. And then you go to Mackey's. Always go to Mackey's. And then you go to Mackey's. Always go to Mackey's. And then you go to movies. And your $20 was almost spent.

If you had a dollar left, you were off to the arcade. Yeah, yeah. Time zone. And these kids are walking around with shopping bags. Madness. Lock them up. Full madness. Number three on the list of the top six other things

and places under 16 should be banned from. The pools, public pools, especially hydro slides. How great are hydro slides? Hydro slides are great. It's been so long. Has it?

Yeah. You simply must. Bali probably, when I went to Bali Bomb. Bali Bomb is so great. I've never heard of Bali Bomb. Put it on my list. Put it on our list.

I would love to attend Bali Bomb with you guys. But you can't look when I come out of the hydro slide and my bikini tops come up. You've got to give me five seconds. We'll get arrested. We'll get arrested in Bali

and sent to Indonesian prison because you've got your tattoos out. I'll wear a one-piece. A high-neck one-piece. Just to get out of prison. Number two on the list of the top six places under 16 should be banned from indoor trampoline parks. Now, this is for their own safety

because when I go, I'm a little bit of a cannonball. Oh, yeah, your weight just kind of offsets him. Dude, I've hurt so many children at indoor trampoline parks. Very rarely was it my fault, though. Do you reckon indoor trampoline parks is at least one injury a day? Dude! At least, I'd say there's one broken bone a day. Got to be.

Got to be. Got to be. Number one on the list of the top six other places under 16 should be banned from public transport. What happened to bikes? What happened to bikes? What happened to bikes? I used to bike to school. We used to bike.

Get on that bike. If you weren't able to bike, it was too far for you to be going. Exactly. It was outside of your jurisdiction and you had no business being there. I had to bike like 45 Ks to school. Did you? I don't know if it was exactly. Just because your dad got lost.

He's in circles. He kept passing his own house. I thought something was wrong. And his mum was like No one of the turns is going to be left You're just going to do a ride I just do loops of the city And then be like oh there's school

Find a phone booth and call home And be like I'm still not there Yeah well that is today's top six Uh oh this is quite sophisticated A new scam Coming for your WhatsApp Where it's targeting your mum Okay

And it's Mother's Day on Sunday We love our mums Christine's also on WhatsApp Yeah mum Bev's on WhatsApp My mum's a messenger girl She does Facebook Messenger And we text

Okay so she's not a Even though she's in Because you know that WhatsApp goes overseas They don't have WhatsApp overseas In Italy they don't have it Okay right I just checked

No she Facebook Messages Okay Yeah that's her So my mum's safe Patsy's safe She wouldn't even know WhatsApp Oh I don't need another app Hayley

God I don't know There's too many So this is called The Hi Mum Scam It's a phishing tactic That is come coming for your mum and it's trying to get her money. And there's two ways they're doing it.

The simple way is a text to your mum on WhatsApp, just saying like, hi mum, tried to call you, but my microphone's not working. So now you can't call me back. How does that work? How do they make it look like it's you that sent it? Random number. Okay.

So just a random number. We text your mum. Hi, mum. It's Hayley. I tried to call, but my phone's broken. I'm trying to sort a new phone. I've just borrowed this phone. Yeah, hence the random number.

Hence the random number. Hence you can't call me back to check that it's me. It's broken. My phone's not, I can't answer my phone. No, it's not working. It's a pain in the ass. Da-da-da-da-da. I've lost everything on the phone. It's not backed up. It It's a pain in the ass. Da-da-da-da-da. I've lost everything on the phone.

It's not backed up. It's such a pain. Oh dear. I need some money. Sorry to ask this. I'm really struggling because I can't pay for anything now with this phone broken.

The bank's sending me a code to my old number and I can't access it now that my phone's broken. My bank account's been shut down for 24 hours because of the changing of the phone number. I've got this bill coming out. It's stressing me out. Are you able to transfer me some money? And then this example that was sent into the internet,

what's the bill? It's a debt I need to clear. I've got the details. Can you transfer it to them? So can you pay the bill? Because my mum knows my bank account number. But Nana, are you able to pay the bill straight away? Some company name.

Very elegant. Okay, so there's that, right? And my mum would be like, oh my god, Hale, why have you got yourself into debt? What have you done here? And that's also a scam that's not new. Not new. Hey, I'm overseas, I need some help kind of thing. Here's the twist on it. The next step of the Hi Mum phishing scandal,

scandal, scamming scandal, is using AI to generate your voice. So you can call and be like, hey, mum, it's Hayley. How are you? No. Hey, I don't have time to talk. I'm so sorry.

Because you're all flustered. I'm all flustered. I've got this bloody bill. Are you able to pay it? And I can pay you back tomorrow. AI. How do they get your voice? I can't try to figure it out.

God, I mean, it would be. Scammers are using AI to generate voice messages so maybe like a memo to say, hey mum they can copy any voice found online Okay, our voices are online So we're screwed because we've got hours of podcasts out there

Target family members with voice notes that are convincing enough to make them fall for the scam So even if you have your social media open, people could get your reels or your TikToks, any videos that you've recorded, maybe you've got a YouTube channel, and you're done.

Jeez Louise. That's Louise indeed. The AI would suck up your voice and learn it pretty quickly. Yeah. And it doesn't need a lot of audio. It doesn't need a lot. And we've given them thousands of hours.

I think we have to talk to our mums and have like a special question that only we could answer. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Password. If I ever ask you for money, mum, which could happen? Tell me why you gave me that big hiding in 1989. She'll say what? Which one?

Which one? Which one? Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays or Sundays. 89 was a tough year for your father so he had a little patience for your bullshit. He received many hires so I'd be like, yeah, okay, it's mum.

But do you know, actually like, because having that question is gonna just be a double check. Maybe like as a family, you could be like, hey, okay, your core family, this is the thing.

If any of us ever ask each other for money, the question we ask is, do you know the way to San Jose? Or what was that funny thing that happened at that thing we were at or that family event? At your uncle's 40th birthday, who was the drunkest at the party?

And you'd be like, Aunty Carol. Aunty Carol. Aunty Carol. And then we go, okay, sure, I'll send you some money. Aunty Carol said that someone had put something in her drink, but it was like, be like, Aunty Carol. Aunty Carol. Aunty Carol. And then we'd go, okay, sure, I'll send you some money. And Aunty Carol said

that someone had put something in her drink but it was like, which drink, Aunty Carol? The first or the 14th? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The cocktail in your hand or the Prosecco

in the other one? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get a grip, Aunty Carol. So I think you've got to have a, you've got to talk to your parents and have a bit of a password. People are falling for it.

Yes, hon, of course. Send over the details. Okay, here's the name of the account. Here's the sort code. Here's the reference. Da-da-da-da-da. It's only getting worse, eh? That's pretty wild. Since the start of 2025,

an AI expert said that this particular phishing scam has scammed WhatsApp users out of about a million New Zealand dollars. Wow. Just by taking little bits.

Little bits, yeah. Oh, little bits. That's the vibe. In 2025. If it's only, you know, $60 or $70, your mum might just be like, well, I'll just pay it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But then if they're doing that to a million people, that's a lot of money. I'm going to need the link to that.

I'm going to send it to mum straight away. Yeah. Be like, have a little read of this. And then send her an invoice you've got just to test her. Just say, hey, could you pay my power bill? Speaking of which, yeah, my account's actually been locked. Be like, good, good. I tested

you and Hayley. Fletchford and Hayley, silly little pole, silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly that the silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole, silly little pole. Silly little pole today is can you change a tyre? Should the tyre on your car become flat? Recently had a flat. Hard to change a tyre, even when you know how.

Do you know how to change a bike tyre? No. Yeah, because I do. They're a bastard, though. They're a bastard. I just take it to the store and I'm like, how? Do you have tubeless tyres on your bike? No.

It's got the tubes in it. Yeah. But I've got Kevlar, those road tyres, so I hardly ever get punctures. Yeah. I've just jinxed myself now. It's hard. Changing a bike tyre, you've got to get the tube inside the thing.

And then you've got to put those things in. It's so annoying. The thing I hate about changing a car tyre is that you can't get the full rotate on the crank. You've got to do that, like, crank, readjust, crank. Because the tyre iron's too long. Yeah. You've got to loosen the nuts before you lift the crank. You've got to do that like, crank, readjust, crank. Crank, because the tyre iron's too long and you've got to loosen the nuts before you lift the car.

And then getting the jack under the right flat bit. That's the bit I always struggle with because you've got to lie on the gravel wherever you are. Yeah, the guy from AA finds that really hard. He's got to get under the car.

Because recently, I got a flat tyre and I was in my dad's ute. And this is when my dad finds out. He's had this ute for like 10, 12 years. That's when he finds there's no jack and no tyre iron. Oh, dear. He's like, it'll be in the toolbox.

Don't you need that for the warrant of fitness? I don't need. The woof? Can't because he's got the woof and everything. You got a woof without a spare tyre, didn't you? Yeah. I got a woof without a spare tyre. I've got a new car.

I don't know if, surely that's got a spare tire under there somewhere in the boot. Yeah, it's got a small man in there too. And he's like, hi. Yeah, and he just comes out and helps. Compliments of Mazda. Compliments of the chef. Yeah, compliments of Mazda for the first 2,000 kilometres. I live in here. I just actually was looking up

where we took, what's the red place that does tires? Firestone. You know the red building? Tony's Tire Service. Tony's Tires place that does tyres? Firestone. You know the red building? Tony's Tyre Service. Tony's Tyres. Michelin. Michelin. Bridgestone. Bridgestone.

Bridgestone. That's not it. I don't know. I was just looking it up because I wanted to give a shout out. Timmy's Tyres. Timmy and Tina's Tyre Service. Tina's Tyre Service. Bridgestone.

I said Bridgestone. Tyre Centre in Matamata. Okay. That's where we went because we got a flat tyre when we were at Hobbiton. I'm not blaming Hobbiton. It was a tech screw that went through the tyre. But no tyre iron, no thing. We ended up jimmying it.

Thanks, by the way. Hobbiton rules, but the people there are very helpful if you get a flat tyre. Basically because your ute and caravan are taking up a bus spot. Did Hobbits come out and change your tyre? Oh, my God. Imagine if Hobbits came out and changed your tyre. Oh, Mr. Smith. That's what they said.

Oh, Mr. Smith. We haven't had second breakfast. The dude, I don't know, I didn't catch his name, but there's a very muscular man working at the tyre shop in Bridgestone, ladies. Oh, really? Okay. Older man. You like your older men. Yeah, big arms.

Big arms on the dude. Nice. And he's changing my tyre. Help! Like if there was no jack, he could probably get the car arms on the dirt. Nice. Yeah. And he's changing my tyre. Help. Like if there was no jack, he could probably get the car up off the ground a bit. I'm going to drive to Mutta Mutta with a knife. Hayley's stuffing the little man in the back of her boot. Get out.

I don't need you. Get out. I don't need you. I'm the big guy from British Corp. Anyway, shout out to them. They did a great job. Shout out. Because Dad's got nitrogen in his tyres. What?

What? What is it? Increases fuel efficiency or something? What is it? It increases he driving a blimp? What is that? Is that blimp? It increases your fuel efficiency or something? What is it? Has he got the Hindenburg on the phone?

What the hell? He's driving on four Hindenburgs. Is he floating around? Just slowly floating around. Oh, the humanity. All right. The feedback is 57% of people can change a tyre. A shocking 43 can't.

That's disgusting. 43 can't that's disgusting people 43 can't sort it out alright Moana says I was 12 when I was 15 I'm 33 and I've never had to do it once

that's because she's too busy wayfaring the oceans with Mario the demigod yeah she's never heard that before wouldn't know now I think it's part of when you get your licence

there should be questions on changing a tyre. You should have to know how to do it. Catherine said, nope, that's why I pay my AA membership fees.

Yeah. Kirstie said, when I bought my first car, my parents made me change all four tyres before I was even allowed to drive it. Best thing to learn.

Yeah, good. Very good call. I guess my hands are mucky though. Kylie said, I'm married to a mechanic. Do I need to say more? No. I think she does.

Because do you need to say more as in, I'm married, of course I know, or I'm married, I don't need to do anything. I would say I'm married, I don't need to do anything. I would have weaponised that incompetence years ago. Me too, we don't need to double up on skills in a marriage. Put a weapon on that one. Yeah, exactly. No, we share the skills. I'll be in here doing the ironing or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll do the weeds, you do the tyres. Tony'll be in here doing the ironing or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll do the weeds. You do the tyres. You do the tyres. Tony Anna says, I think to get your learners, you should have to prove you can change a tyre. Couldn't agree more. Couldn't agree more. Marianne, I pulled over and changed a tyre for a young man. I'm a woman in her 40s.

You should have seen this young fella. Oh, he would have. Emasculated. Emasculated. Emasculated, but also pretty, like, mummy hot. Yeah. Mummy, I didn't have to change my tyre

help me mummy help me mummy good boy ooh that's yuck ooh don't say that again I'm over it now okay yeah taught my two girls

to change a tyre too it should be taught to all when they get their licence grumpy Lisa clocking in there yep good noob said

happened to be on the way to a way pulled over and realised I couldn't undo any of the bolts after lots of trying I reluctantly called breakdown and said it pains me to say this but I need a strong man to come and I would like to know the gender breakdown of the AA roadside rescue people.

Oh, yeah. Because you do think it's going to be a man. And maybe that's just my old-fashioned sexism. It sounds like your old-fashioned sexism. It actually does feel like that. Gabby said, I'm actually not sure. If push came to shove, I'd try, but I don't know if I'd do it right. Don't let Hayley know that I voted yes, she might get turned on.

That is from Megan, who looks to be a short-haired lesbian. Oh, no. Between this and the massive arms guy at Borupari Matsumatsu. Oh, my God, I've ticked. Both ends of my spectrum. You're so greedy. I'm so greedy. Both ends of your spectrum. So're so greedy. I'm so greedy. Both ends of your spectrum.

So greedy. Pick one. No picking. That silly little pie. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. ACC have released stats, New Zealand's most dangerous sport. It's not e-scooters. It's not marching.

It's rugby. Rugby. Yeah. Rugby. Yeah. Rugby. Head knocks. In 2024, figures show that 34 new claims per 100 registered rugby players. So for every 100 people playing rugby, a third of them, 34%, yeah. 33.333, right?

Cost New Zealand $148 million. I don't have that kind of money. In like rehab, surgeries, all of that. Yeah, torn ligaments, sprains, head knocks, gashes, wounds. Second most accident prone sport. What do you think it is? It'll just be one heaps of people play. Does rugby include rugby league?

I don't know actually It doesn't say You know rugby league is in there So second is football It's the second most risky code That cost taxpayers I just think it's because so many people play it Yeah

78.6 million And that's 22.9 claims per 100 registered soccer players Wow But then that's not counting someone that's running around a field. Like if we went and kicked the ball around playing soccer. That would be so embarrassing to watch. Registered. I don't know.

So rugby league was third with 22.6 out of 100 players. Yeah. Costing ACC $29.6 million. Netballers, 18 per 100 players. What are you doing? You've got to have one foot planted on the ground at all times. Submitted an injury claim, $48 million was what Nettie cost. So rugby league was behind netball and then hockey.

So it goes rugby union, football, netball, rugby league, hockey. Hockey? Hockey. Yeah. Did you ever take a stick to the face? No. I took many balls to the face. Yeah.

And continue to do so. Became a bit of a passion project. That was really good. I thought you'd like that. I thought you'd like that. It's really tickled me. It has tickled you. I thought you'd like that.

And I didn't cost the taxpayer anything. Oh, no. No. I paid for the book. I paid. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Shannon has promised us a hack.

Yes, indeed. Based on a cost of living crisis that we've been talking about this week. Yeah, across the country, everyone's been talking about how butter has got to $10 for 500 grams. Yeah. That's sanity. I think even the cheap budget brands are like eight something. I've seen people posting on Reddit that it was like $13. Yeah.

In some place. You know, if you can go to like a convenience dairy or something. Yeah. Is your butter hack, I'm just predicting based on how Shannon's hacks worked in the past, is your butter hack just like steal it? No, no, no, no. I believe in ethical economy fixing and that's what I'm

here to do today. So in front of you. It's going to be printing more money, eh? Is it buy a printer and print your own money? No. So I've got here 300 mils of cream, which cost me $3.

And I've got a jar. Okay. Previously owned jar, so that cost you nothing? Nothing. I would like you to give me, according to the internet, approximately 25 minutes. Okay. And I will provide you with 300 grams of butter.

I am going to churn butter for you this morning. But as a standard mason jar, what's your churn? So I've seen this on Real Housewives of Salt Lake City and then I've done some further research on TikTok. No further research was needed I think. No, it's not. So instead of using a churning machine

which would cost you money. Because those are those big like stick things. I've seen that you can just shake a jar of cream vigorously, it'll create not only butter, extra hack you get free buttermilk because that's how it works you separate the solids from the liquids

we could make fried chicken if we wanted that's tomorrow we'll do the fried chicken I've made whipped cream this way when I haven't had a whisk or a whip and I've quickly had to make whipped cream you just shake, shake, shake, shake the bottle until it thickens enough that you can put it

on a cake. Can you hear that? Once it gets the cream. Wait, hang on. I've got some ASMR happening. Oh yeah, okay. It's very Oh. Oh yeah, okay. It's a bit sloppy. Yeah, this is from the dairy I will say. Okay. Wait, did you check the use by date? No. Because you know the dairy's right about low say.

If it started to go lumpy, you're a step closer to butter already. Yeah, you are actually. I've also brought in, guys, some white bread for us. Oh, yum. So I will make us some butter. To test the butter.

Oh, fantastic. Of course. I don't know how long this will take me, so I'll just keep you updated as the morning goes on. Why didn't you just ask me to bring in the KitchenAid? Because surely that would work, right?

No, it would work so much easier. But you would have to spend, like, I don't own a KitchenAid. I'm really also hoping this jar's watertight. It's meant to be. Oh my God, I want cream to go all over it. Okay. Okay, we're out.

Okay. Give me 25 minutes and I will give you some white bread and butter. Right, for only $3. For $3 for 300 grams, which would make this half price If $10 is 500g, blah blah blah I think a lot of people are saying that 300g of cream

Doesn't make 300g of butter Yeah, because the water is the separator Well, it's still going to be a lot cheaper It's going to be a lot cheaper Are we going to need to Step in to help Yeah, we're going to need to take shifts on the shake I'm just not going to produce at all this morning.

No, we're going to need you. So don't call, don't do anything. No social media. I'm making butter. Okay, right. How's it looking so far? Creamy. Foamy.

I might have put too much cream in here. It's quite a small jar, too. Yeah. I would have gone a bigger jar. Okay, no need to jar shame me. I would have gone pickle jar. I would have gone pickle jar. I would have gone pickle jar.

Large jar. I would have gone big Delmaine pickle jar. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, apparently I'll make whipped cream in the next two minutes, and then your butter is on the way. I don't want whipped cream on toast. I'm expecting butter.

I'm loving this. This is a line. If I get butter, if I get butter, are we going to add salt? We got salt? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course. If we get butter on toast, Shannon, I will give you five stars. Will you actually?

Yeah. That would make me very happy. Well, it's early days here, Shannon. Okay, we'll leave you there with that gross sound. We're like two minutes into the shaking. I think we're going to need to take shifts. She's out of breath. Yeah. Yeah. We'll do butter updates.

Play ZM's Fletch, Fawn and Hayley. Well, I don't know how this is going to go and maybe it's not the day to do it considering opening a show tonight and I'm feeling kind of emotionally fragile. But people are using ChatGPT to ask it, how can I be more attractive? And what they're doing is they're uploading photos. Now, today I've come into the office raw dog.

I've put my hair in a bun, no makeup on, haven't done anything. You're looking radiant. Thank you. Thank you. Lovely. Now, we're going to put this to the test. You upload a photo of yourself to ChatGPT, and you ask it,

what recommendations would you make to enhance my natural beauty or something like that? I thought it was set up not to be mean. It's not. You're asking it for... Yeah, you're not saying, am I pretty? Am I a dog? Or am I a minger?

Am I an A-grade minger? What recommendations do you have? So you've sent me a photo. I've just sent a photo of me Just when I feel like I was looking like a cutie patootie But very natural Yeah What recommendations

Do you have to enhance My natural beauty Okay Photos I'm gonna hit enter Wait Wait stop Are you sure you wanna do this

Yeah And what A lot of people are doing this This is going viral on TikTok Because people are uploading it And sharing what ChatGPT says and the ChatGPT

comes in about things about your complexion, your hair colour, what kind of make-up would look good. We've got a five-point plan. Okay. To enhance my beauty.

Okay, wow. So it says, do you reckon I just need a one-point plan? Oh, screw you. Well, send me a photo of your face. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hang on. And I'll put it in. I don't need a photo of my face. I'll take a photo of your face right now. No, yeah. Hang on. And I'll put it in. I don't need a photo of my face. I'll take a photo of your face right now. No, go on, because I look like a tired minger. Yeah, well, I sent a tired minger pic. Yeah, great. You would look terrible in that photo.

And Vaughn, I sent a professional one to the group chat for you to upload. Well, you look quite nice. Vaughn's just taken a really terrible photo of me doing a silly face. Yeah, can you just say what it says about me? I'm ready. Wait, but are you not going to be mad at Vaughn or I for this? There's no promises there. I'm a woman. Yeah, can you just say what it says about me? I'm ready. Wait, but are you not going to be mad at Vaughn or I for this? There's no promises there. I'm a woman. Yeah. I don't know where I'm at in my

menstrual cycle. It just feels like a trap. We've all been there in the changing rooms when you've been like, how do I look? And you're like, great. You took too long. It shouldn't take that long. I'm right before your eyes. Here's what it says about Hayley.

It says, you're already glowing with warmth and natural charm to gently enhance your natural beauty while keeping your look authentic. Here are a few personalised suggestions. One, skin radiance. You have a lovely skin texture. You're using a hydrating serum with hyaluronic acid.

I already use it every single morning. Can give a slightly more dewy finish. Dewy finish. Also, I'm too matte. I'm dry. I am a dry woman. If you're not already using a tinted moisturizer, a light coverage option, excuse me,

can even tone while letting your natural skin show through. Oh, wow. So I've got acne. Awesome. Why did you ask? Acne scarring. A soft peachy or rose-toned cream blush would complement your natural flush

and give you a little more extra vibrancy to the cheeks. Okay, so flat face. Flat face, flat complexion. Flat dry face, all right. Your lashes are already full and defined. A lash trim could enhance them even further, or a lash tint slash lift for a low-maintenance pop. No, my eyelashes are too long.

They bump my sunglasses. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Your brows are strong and well-shaped. A clear or lightly tinted brow gel would polish them with just a touch without changing their natural shape. Yeah. Your brows are strong and well shaped. A clear or lightly tinted brow gel would polish them with just a touch without changing their natural shape. Okay. This is about your lips. Thin. I've been thinking about getting

filler. Thin. A hydrating tinted balm in a berry or nude rose tone would highlight your natural lip shape to give a fresh, healthy look. Try again. Hair framing. If you're open to it, some softly face framing layers Or highlights

See Chachi Petit I've got very thin hair I can't layer I can't layer Because if you layer it It's all very wispy I don't think you can see it

Because your hair is tied up In the photo From all the Tips you've seen online Do you think it's got it right For most people Or it's just kind of like General

I think it feels a bit general Like these things That it's talking about A tinted moisturiser and some rosy cheeks, it kind of, like, applies to everyone. But it does know that you're dry. It does know that I've got a flat, dry face. A flat, dry face.

So maybe it does know. Was that it? Is that all it said? Hold on, I'm just putting fletches in. Colour Harmony, a pink stripe. The pink stripe shirt you're wearing is a fantastic colour on you. Soft pastels and warm, rosy tones

really suit your complexion. Consider using similar shades in makeup or accessories. Wow, so it gave the Kmart shirt a real A+. Shout out. Now, if you want to get one, it's $25 from Kmart.

Yeah. You can call it Karen Mart. She hasn't had legal action against me yet. Okay, this is what it said about Fletch. You already have a strong, vibrant presence

with a clean, athletic style and warm charisma. Clean, athletic. Wow. charisma. Clean, athletic. Wow. Hello. Here we go. Here's your tips. How many points plan did I need?

Five as well. Damn it. Skin freshness and care. Keep skin looking fresh and protected. Something like a matte finish SPF won't feel greasy. A gentle exfoliation one to two times a week can help maintain a smooth texture and a healthy glow. They already do that. And just for an event or on camera,

maybe use a tinted moisturizer or BB cream. That's optional. Yeah. Grooming tweaks. A brow tidy up. Lightly grooming if you're open to it to clean under the brows. A bit can sharpen your face without feminizing it. Okay.

We don't want to feminize. Very mask. Yeah. A nourishing balm on the lips helps avoid dryness and adds a polished look. Dry lips. He's got dry lips. I've got feminise. Very masc. Yeah. A nourishing balm on the lips helps avoid dryness and adds a polished look. Dry lips. He's got dry lips. I've got dry lips.

It knows. Hair and cap style. If you ever go without a hat, a clean trim will edge up around the forehead and neckline sharpens your whole look. It doesn't know that you're bald. It doesn't know that I don't have hair. You tricked it.

I tricked it. Hat rotation. You pull off the cap look well. It's experimenting with subtle style shifts like a canvas dad cap can refresh your style. Oh, no. Absolutely not.

Clothing tones, earth tones and deep blues like the one you're wearing suit you well. Try layering a crisp tee or a button-up undersweatshirts to add and build visual interest. And your natural smile is a major asset. Easy, genuine and confident. This photo I put up of you is you literally being like, do, do, do.

Yeah, he looks like a minger. So it's being nice. That's being nice, isn't it? It is being nice. Someone did text in and say, I've asked ChatGPT the same thing and it's given the exact same advice. I think it's a bit of a rinse and repeat.

Unbelievable. I was just feeling quite good for a second there. Have you put yours in? No, I haven't put mine in. You can't get away with it. I bet you're just going, oh, you've got a warm complexion

with Arabian energy. But you're trying to send your professional. Don't forget to put on some lip balm. You send a professional photo. Yeah, you've got a warm complexion with Arabian energy. You're trying to send a professional lip balm. You send a professional photo. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep the beard

trimmed with some nice edgy. Yeah. Okay, hold on. Let's see. Think about it. Where did I save that? Imagine if it put a

voice and it was just like, hey, what's up you ugly minger four eyes? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is that beard compensating for your weak ass jaw?

Yeah. You're wearing a beanie. What are you, a 12 year old? Put a shotgun in your mouth. Or something like Yeah. You're wearing a beanie. What are you, a 12-year-old? Put a shotgun in your mouth. Or something like that. Okay, that got dark.

That got dark. That got dark. Yeah, hey, monobrow, feel free to split those brows in half. Even tone. You've got great skin clarity. Use a light serum with ninaminicid? Niacinamide. Or vitamin C.

Niacinamide, by the way. Everyone should be using that. What is that? What is that? What is it do? It's completely changed my complexion. Although,

ChatGPT said I had a dry face. Your beard's well shaped, your yellow edge ups and a beard oil will help keep it conditioned. Just a subtle boost to your teeth

could be a whitening strip or a whitening toothpaste. Your old yellow tooth over here. Oh my God. I'm a mini teen. You're a mini teen. You're ruthless. Shirt here. Oh, my God. A mini T. Mini T.

Ruthless. Shirt fit. Oh, you've got a great build and sure, shirts stay tailored at the waist and shoulders to keep that sharp silhouette. Eyebrows. Nose you've been working out. Just a very light tidy up. Eye brightness.

Oh, if you ever get tired looking eyes. Just look at him. Look at me right now. I didn't look tired in this photo. Well, you can have a go. GPT, you've just got to upload a photo. U at me right now. I didn't look tired in this photo. Well, you can have a go. GPT, just got to upload a photo. Upload a photo. And then take a deep breath and ask it to criticise you.

Producer Shannon is midway through her hack. Butter update. And making butter. Look, it's solidified already. Oh, my goodness. It was just cream before. It's whipped. I will say I poured some out in the sink because there was no room.

In the sink? Well, yeah. Put it in a cup. We'll drink it. Yeah, that's fair. You know what? Hindsight got you. It's wasteful.

So actually now this butter's just gotten more expensive. That's all I'm going to say is because some of it got tipped down the sink. Okay, so it's made butter? Well, I would say over whipped cream currently. Okay. Keep going. If you did this, your mum would be mad at you currently. Yeah.

But I think soon, we're going to have butter, baby. No, sit to it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. I'd say it's the biggest night in fashion every year, the Met Gala. And it was one of my favourite Met Galas

so far, because I absolutely loved it. But we're going to bring in a senior reporter from People Magazine, Sean Mandel. Good morning, Sean. Good morning. Now, thank you so much for joining us. We just want to get an outside perspective on this. One, because I don't want to talk about fashion on my own

and the boys have no idea. They're wearing a grey T-shirt and a black T-shirt. This is, no, this is fashion. A cap and a beanie. This is fashion. But Sean, do you agree the Met Gala is the pinnacle of fashion every year? Oh, absolutely. The first Monday in May, as it's called, there's been an entire documentary on the biggest night of the year

that is part of celebrating the Metropolitan Museum of Art Fair Fashion Institute. So every year there is a different theme, which is not just a excuse for a theme party, although it does work out that way. It is tied to an exhibition that happens at the Met every year. And that exhibition is chosen with a mind of what people in the fashion industry want to talk about or reflect on. You know, for instance, in recent years, Karl Lagerfeld had passed away. So there was an entire year devoted to him. And this year, the theme was super fine, tailoring black style, sort of nod to and look at dandyism

as it relates to black men from the 18th century forward. And there was a lot of tailoring on the red carpet last night, or the blue carpet, daffodil. Yeah, the carpet was amazing, but we saw like suits, we saw a lot of pinstripes, a lot of big shoulders, a lot of very suave-looking large hats. Did you have – I want to know your favourite and your least favourite. Oh, my favourite would definitely – I mean, this is not a big controversial choice.

My favourite would have to be Rihanna. She delivered – she was one of the biggest moments of the night. She arrived late, or as someone once described it as Rihanna time. She arrived about 10 p.m. on the carpet, which, of course, delivers a presence, a big moment. So she wore a custom Marc Jacobs gown that had a bustle on the back which was really interesting it was essentially a suit jacket as if it had been tied around your waist like a sweatshirt you were the hoodie but sean what was it the front what was it the front exactly i was gonna say i was like let's talk about the back before we get to the front, which is aside from the look

and maybe takes a little bit of the steam away from the look, is she revealed a baby bump in typical Rihanna style, announcing her, seemingly announcing her third pregnancy. She didn't come out and say the words, I am pregnant, but

it is clear she was pregnant and she thanked people who were congratulating her. I would never congratulate. I'm waiting for the woman to say out loud, I'm pregnant before I mention anything. Yeah, you've got to be careful. You've got to be careful. And that's been a lot of the coverage.

It's been written as seemingly pregnant. Seemingly. Who was your worst pick then? For me, I'm going to say Kendall Jenner. It was so boring. I was going to say Kendall Jenner. It was actually, that was, I called it a Jones New York Macy's suit to a friend earlier. Did she just go in and pick it off the rack?

How embarrassing. Get inspired. And she usually hits sometimes. She goes a bit bold and that was dreary considering all the amazing tailoring. Yeah, exactly. And even the dreariness aside, let's say you want to lean into the dreariness and be sort of muted, it just wasn't tailored well and the whole I mean, tailoring is in the

theme, is in the title of the theme. So it just, it really fell flat and, you know, like you said, was very disappointing. I have a question. How did Lorde's dress stay on? He said, how did she keep that on the teats?

I mean, there had to be a mound of double stick tape involved there or some very serious adhesive that was going to be painful. I'm not trusting tape. I'm not trusting the sticky tape. I've used

sticky tape before. I'm not trusting that with Lord's look. I'd be going super blue and just getting rid of a bit of skin. Can we also talk about there's a couple... You go, Dale. You go. Oh, no. I was just going to say, I'm like, you're going to need some very serious

adhesive there, I think. Or the entire backing had to have been covered in some sort of something probably more powerful than scotch tape. Now, Megan Thee Stallion was very naughty, wasn't she? Did you see this?

You're not allowed phones inside, but she was filming the whole thing. Does that mean she'll be banned next year? She'll be added to the ban list? You know, I don't think that she will be banned. I think that maybe her cable will be downgraded uh where she's sat or something but you know the other thing is who knows where it will be 12 months from now uh because anna winter who is uh you know vogue global director uh in addition to being vogue editor and chief this is her very much her baby she has made the Met Gala into what it is.

You know, this used to just be a fundraising night. I mean, it is a fundraiser. And then people used to turn up in these sort of just like boring gowns, right? And when you look back at the last few years, and now they're wearing pianos on their back, like a backpack. Yeah.

And Katy Perry wasn't there, was she? No, Katy Perry was AI again. Was AI attending? AI was attending with that. Yeah. There were, you know, people talking about that. And between that and Megan Thee Stallion, there's always some interesting moments that happen at the Met Gala.

And it'll be interesting to see as well which of those moments have staying power in terms of our popular imagination and what we remember years out. Well, this is definitely one of my favourite years. Honestly, I loved it. The tailoring is

amazing. Hey, Sean, we've got to go, but thank you so much for that. Absolutely loved your take on the fashion of the Met Gala, and we look forward to chatting to you again. Thanks so much. Play ZM's Fletchborn and Hayley. Well, we started the hour with a hack from Shannon. What the hell? Before my eyes and her mason jar that she's shaken up is yellow butter.

Shannon's just buttering a piece of toast. Was anybody watching Shannon the whole time? She hasn't snuck butter into the mason jar. No, I was. Now, Shannon, this hack is for the cost of living crisis and butter prices at the moment. Exactly. I got 300 mils of cream.

I didn't use it all, but I put it in a mason jar. I've shook it for maybe 30 minutes straight. Yeah, just over 30 minutes. I've got a cup of buttermilk here and some fresh butter. I put some salt on it for you. How much butter do you reckon you would get out of I reckon it's a pretty equal ratio. I reckon I put

that much cream in and I got that much out. It's so good. Boys do you want a quick bite? Yeah, yeah, I'll have a bite of that. Oh my god. Good stuff. Good stuff. It's mild, it's a mild taste, not super, super richy butter. You could add salt as well. Oh my god Shannon. And we've got buttermilk, so let's

make some chicken. Uh-oh. Uh-oh, what do you mean? Uh-oh. Is it happening? I think she's done it. Five stars. I think she's finally got a five star hat. Five stars for Shannon's hat! Woo-hoo! She gets a jingle. Thank you. I mean, I don't know if you were to spend $10 on cream

if you would get what? No, you would. You would get more than 500 mil if you would get... What? No, you would. You would get more than 500 mils of butter. Also, definitely. Look at her biceps. If you had a litre of cream. Yeah, and there's got to be an easier way to do that, right? Well, yeah, so you can use a KitchenAid or a Nutribullet or anything,

but if you just want to spend no money, shake a jar for half an hour and you've got butter, baby. It's soft. It's spreadable, too. It's not going to tear your toast. Yeah, it's good stuff. We'll put this up on our socials because this is going to blow your mind. A five star hack.

It's finally happened. It won't be redacted either unless we poop ourselves. Do you know what I mean? It runs straight through us. You know what we should have done though is weighed how much butter we got after the liquid was taken away,

after the buttermilk was taken out. Again, don't let science ruin a good time. You're trying to downscale this. No, I'm just trying to say, we're going to all this effort. If butter I'm just trying to say, like, you know, we're going to all this effort. If butter is, if it's cheaper just to buy it, it's not, you know, easier, is it?

Shh, let her have this. Okay, we'll work it out. As she said, don't let science ruin a good time. Don't let science ruin a good time. Okay, so 300 mils of double cream will give you approximately 200 grams of butter. There you go. Okay, that's not bad. We're all good.

We're still cheaper. That would have been $3 for 200 grams. butter. There you go. Okay, that's not bad. We're all good. We're still cheaper. That would have been $3 for 200 grams. Yes. Yeah, so for a five block, oh, we're back at kind of the same price of butter. No, we're not. No, we're not. Still a little cheaper. It's still a little cheaper. A little bit cheaper. And you get to have fun shaking a jar.

And you get buttermilk. And you get the, you can use it for your chicken. Yeah, fried chicken. Five stars. Five stars, Jen. Good work. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. I am pleasured to my core

to have Morgan Penn sexologist, somatic sexologist, joining us in studio. How are you, Morks? I'm thrilled that you're pleasured. To my core. Wow. And we don't just have you in here because we I'm thrilled that you're pleasured. To my core. Wow. And we don't just have you in here because we like your company

and you're our friend and you're very pretty to look at. Thanks. But four of the six working televisions are telling us that Sex.Life's back. Yes. Now, the other two are telling us not much at all. They're off. Yeah, they're broken.

Doesn't matter. But finally we can see it, Morgan. We can see it. I nearly whipped you. Oh, my God. You know I'd be in for that, but I need to have some warning. May 28th. Yeah, baby.

Sex.Life Season 3 launches. And we have been sitting on this for so long. How many times do you reckon in the last year you've been asked, is there another season? Is there another season? Is there another season? I reckon at least three times a week, but it always cracks me up

when people pop up when I'm doing like a really informative, like educational video on my Instagram. And then someone's like, hey, side note, are you doing season three? So when you're really feeling into your body, is there a season three?

Well, the answer is yes. Well, the people wanted it and they're going to get it. They're going to get it. And this is honestly, I'm kind of nervous about this one. Yeah, it's definitely a step up in terms of like how much you're sharing personally. Yes. And also, I think it's just so revealing of how unwell I was as a teenager.

Yeah. Oh my God, are we reflecting on our teenage years? Yes. Oh God. The amount of times that reflecting on our teenage years? Yes. Oh God. The amount of times that we've used the word unwell in the episodes we've recorded so far. Oh really? So what is this season, how would you summarise it? What's the journey?

This is my quest for love. Okay. And, you know, we've seen for the past two seasons, I've been out there putting my body on the line to figure out what's happening in the sexual landscape of Aotearoa, but also figuring out what I personally like sexually. And this time, I'm

actually revealing the truth, which is I deeply want to partner, and I want to be in union and do that. But I'm like, well, why hasn't that actually happened for me? I mean, I've had a lot of fun. I've had a lot of fun. You've had your fair share of fun. Oh, yeah. And I was trying to find a partner for that to stop. So other people had some fun.

Oh, but isn't it annoying when they're hanging around still and they don't leave? Don't you? Yeah, so afterwards what happens is like then you would do life things. Oh, okay. I saw Fletch shudder when you said union before he went oof. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, single forever, babes. But I can't fly that flag with you forever. We've journeyed since I was 16. I actually talk about you, Fletch, in this podcast. I know, because this is how Morgan and I met. I was working at a radio station in Nelson, and Morgan came to do work experience and start her career in radio.

I didn't really know this either, and then when we started started without giving too much away but where we kind of meet Fletch which is quite at the beginning. Yes. I was like oh my god this is making so much sense. We will say you're a hero you're not a villain. Yeah I'm a hero. You are a hero in my story. We always joke about this. Yeah great. This moment

and I won't spoil the podcast but this moment. Yes. Like already the journey between season one and season three, when you were like, do this and put this there. And I was like, oh no, I don't do that. I think that is what's really beautiful is like Hayley and I, we have evolved so much

personally and professionally. We've evolved. Oh, we have evolved. And it's reflected in the season. And so you have opened up more. And I think that's a gift and it's a permission to all of us, right? Yeah.

That we can keep expanding and opening and becoming more sexually liberated. I mean, I took my clothes off and went to an auntie party and shout out to the listener who's listening now who walked past and said,

oh shit, Hayley Sproul from ZM. Yep, I was there. Yep, that was me. Well, you can subscribe to the podcast wherever you podcast so that when it comes out

you will be notified and you will get that first episode. It is coming up. May 28th, and it will be out every hump day following that. Morgan, I am so excited to share this with the world. I know you're nervous, but it's going to be juicy and good. Yes. Thanks, Morgsy.

Love you guys. Play ZM's Fletchbourne and Hayley. Tonight, my Comedy Fest show, The Baroness, opens in Wellington. I'm very excited to be down there. I'll be down there for the rest of the week. So you'll be broadcasting the show from our Wellington studio? Yes, I will be. On Thursday and Friday?

Yeah, I will be. I know, I just came back and now I'm already gone. She's a jet setter. She's a busy mover and a shaker. But the one thing I haven't sorted with my show tonight... Is the show? Yeah. But we'll find it in the room.

Find it in the room. Nah, we're going to have fun. Do you know that some people's like literal worst nightmare? I know. What is? Public speaking for a start. Oh, yeah. So not really being sure on what you're doing.

Yeah, and just trying to find it in the room. Nah, it's you just going out and telling some sick yarns and I'm so looking forward to it. However, this is what I need help with. And I was racking my brain yesterday. I couldn't land on anything. And I was like, do you know who's going to help me? Our FVH listeners.

Also, best listeners in the game. Best listeners in the game. And I'll toe-talk with that. So what happens is, audience is coming in. There's house music. Right, I'm going to have some fun girly pop bangers going on. Your Chapel Rhymes, your Sabrina Carpenters. You know, few surprises in there. Yeah, yeah. Hell yeah. Then I'm going to have some fun girly pop bangers going on. Your Chapel Royans, your Sabrina Carpenters, you know.

Yeah. A few surprises in there. Yeah, yeah. Hell yeah. Then it's going to go, it's going to go quiet. Yeah. Right? Are we fading the lights down? We're fading the lights down.

House lights down. House lights down. Okay. And then there'll be an announcement that says, welcome to the New Zealand International Comedy Festival. No filming, no doing this. I think I was still at the bar the other night when that came on. That's fine.

Comedy Festival. You're getting your 10th wine. And then it will tell you. Comedy and Chardonnay, those are his two favourite things. His favourite things. Hey, by the way. Battery, battery. If you are coming to my show, it always says,

please don't film and please don't take photos. Go crazy. Really? Yeah, I don't care. Well, no, they don't want the jokes. No, because then the jokes go online. They like the jokes. Photos, yes.

But Vaughan Smith will say no videos. Okay, no videos. Videos with muted. Take photos, I don't care. Anyway, so then the lights go down. It'll say, welcome to the thing. Photos, yes. But Vaughan Smith will say no videos. Okay, no videos. Videos with muted. Take photos, I don't care. Anyway, so then the lights go down. It'll say, welcome to the thing. It does an intro. And then a song is going to start.

It's going to crank. It's going to give the energy of the show. And I'm going to say backstage, please welcome to the stage, Hayley Sproul. It's always weird when people do that themselves. You have to. It's the comedy way. I always found it so weird. I think you should put on an accent.

Right. What accent? So people don't think it's you. Alright, crazy Wellington, are you ready to party? Yes! Go crazy for your

entertainment tonight. It's Eilidh Sproul. Okay, I'm going to do an unsouth African accent. Can you? Yeah, why not? Okay, I want someone to film that part.

Okay. So when the house lights go down, someone who's going tonight, film that, send it to us. Tonight's Wellington audience, I will be back announcing myself in a South African magazine. You've got to say, I've porked the core out the back.

She's porked the core, she's ready to rock and roll. She's ready to make you laugh. Laugh, laugh. Please welcome to stage, Eilis Brow. The thing I want help with, what is the song? What is my walk on music? It's integral for a comedian. Okay.

We're seeing the energy. And it doesn't need to be the start, right? It can be the hook of the song. It can... No on music? It's integral for a comedian. Okay. We're seeing the energy. And it doesn't need to be the start, right? It can be the hook of the song. It can. No, yeah, I can drop into a chorus. Drop into a chorus. We're all good. How do you do that, by the way?

Edit it. Oh, so you get the thing. Operator will edit it. Right, right. Eye of the tiger. It's too obvious. Thank you for your suggestion. No, too obvious.

She's not boxing. She's not boxing. I'm not boxing. No. I think I want something. It's like, I want, it doesn't have to be modern. I just want something that's like high energy.

Here comes the boom's not a bad one. Here comes the boom. Do you know, there's a lot of, a lot of sports songs that have been overdone to death. Like Eye of the Tiger. Yeah, or. High energy. Dog days are over.

I know, but our friends got married to that and entered down the aisle. I think they'll be pissed off. No, they wouldn't. Well, they don't own the song. No. They'd be honoured. Christina Aguilera Dirty.

I do. I do, Vaughan. Yes. That's not Here Comes the Boom, is it? No. They're talking about P.O.D.'s boom. We are in a bit of a P.O.D. kick.

No, that's not it. Holy moly. Okay. That's not it. Heaps of suggestions coming in. Thank you, guys. Elton John's The Bitch is back. That feels targeted. No. That's a great show. Holy moly. Okay. That's not it. Heaps of suggestions coming in. Thank you, guys. Elton John's The Bitch is back. That feels targeted.

That's a great song, though, man. No. You hit the chorus on it. Okay, that's kind of like got a show vibe about it. No, it's too old-fashioned. It's too old-fashioned. This is a show about me not wanting to get older, okay? We can't have that.

Okay, She's So Vain. Too slow. But that's a great song. Okay, She's So Vain. Okay, I wasn't... That's a great song. You're right. You're right. We do have the best listeners. Okay, sorry. This was not an invitation for a roasting.

We have Booty, Booty, Booty Rockin' Everywhere. Oh, Ms. New Booty. Way above the sparks. Stealing Can't Hold Us, Not My Vibe. Oh my God, there's so many. Skrillex, Bangarang. Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. That's pretty good.

Venga Boys, people are saying. No, you can't say Alvin John's too old and then play Tina Turner, Simply the Beast. Also, I want high energy, and I'm coming out to this little straw. I'm cold and I need you. My heart's on fire. We also can't do Timmy Trumpet and Savage Freaks

because we've got secret sound PTSD. Oh, yeah, yeah. That song I want to hear in a public home. Yeah. Yeah. Edge of Midnight,

Miley Cyrus, Stevie Nicks, Cotton Eye Joe. Now, again, it feels a little bit like an attack here. What about... You are missing... Fletch is chucking

in his own suggestions here by the way These are not listener suggestions I'm just scrolling down the music database There's gotta be more to life By Stacey Arrigo Don't get me wrong, listen to this Beautiful song It's not what she's after though

We've had so many texts for 7-Eleven Beyonce I don't know that You chuck that on Here's 7-Eleven? You chuck that on. By Beyonce. Okay, here's 7-Eleven by Beyonce. Oh, okay. We've all got a stink face on. Three white people are popping. Hey guys, alert! The whites are

popping. The whites are popping, guys. Oh my god, there's so many suggestions. I really like that. Name a Beyonce song Halo Name one from that album That you all said was great And deserted the

The Academy Award Halo Somebody said anything From the Bloodhound Gang Okay Now I would tread lightly In playing any Bloodhound Gang song

Holy moly Because They're full of swear words But you've already got A radio edit Do you? No Blung

We're scared Hang on I Oh, we're scared. Hang on, I'm not. We're scared. What song? Bloodhound Gang. Any of them. Pour some sugar on me. I've walked onto stage in the bar to that before.

Thank you. Oh, do the bad touch. The bad touch. This is it. This is going to be it. Okay, wait. Hayley, do your announcement. Do your...

Welcome to the New Zealand International Comedy Festival. No photos. No, no, no. Please enjoy the show. All right, everybody. are you ready to party? She's parked the car and she's ready to make you laugh. Please welcome to the stage, Hayley Sproul. Yeah.

But we need to come in later. You need to finish Hayley Sproul on this part. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. She finishes Hayaley Sproul. The lyrics start. The lyrics where it drops. Because it starts hot,

this song, too. Like, it's almost like it starts on sort of a semi-chorus. I'm not convinced on that. Are you not sold on that? No. I thought we'd found the winner.

No. Is it De Harmo Ride? Oh, God, no. Who messaged that? We're going... Oh, dude! Triple Blues Traveller! Yeah! Yeah, I do triple. Blues Traveller. Yeah.

Yeah. You know I love Blues Traveller. She says, welcome, Hayley Sproul. You know that I make my shows for the girly pops. This is not it. Hayley Sproul. Once upon a... I love this song so much.

It's unbelievable. This is one of the songs I put on in a bit of a glum spot. Is it? Yeah, dude. Blues Traveller. This and dude. Blues Traveller. This is Hook by Blues Traveller. We've had multiple suggestions for me coming out too. Welcome to the show.

Hey, Les Bro. Oh, you ladies pop your like this. You can do that. It's for the ladies. Bit of Bob Marley. Bit of Bob Marley. My two friends are men in their mid-40s, and I've just realised that.

My two friends are men in their mid-40s. Girl've just realised that my two friends are men in their mid-forties. Buffalo Soldier! Girlies, girlies, get me out of here! Buffalo Soldier! This is great, you could come out to this. What have you done? This is lots of fun.

Jeepers. You're in like a thousand songs in here. We've had so many suggestions from our listeners, I'm going to go through them. I'll choose one from this. It's really helping me. Yeah. I just keep scrolling through and playing random songs. This is fun.

We should do a new segment called Random Songs in the Database. Random Songs in the List. That we do or don't love. And it's random and then you play like 10 and then everyone picks which one they want to hear the full song of. People in radio programming will love this. It's exactly what you don't do. Circle of life, someone's just suggested.

Now, that would be an interesting energy. Somebody said London Bridge by Fergie. How come every time you come around? You know, Fletch told me to tell someone that I slept with Fergie back in the day. What? Wait, what? We were having a chat the other day and he's like, you should tell them you slept with Fergie

back in the day. No, because they, in context, Vaughan said, oh, this person slept with someone famous. And I was like, brag, tell them you slept with Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas. Oh, you mean? Yeah. Even though Vaughan hasn't slept with, I just want to say, Vaughan has not slept with, I wouldn't, back in the day, who would have said no to Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas. Oh, you mean? Yeah. Even though Vaughan hasn't slept. I just want to say Vaughan has not slept. I wouldn't.

Back in the day, who would have said no to Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas? There's no London Bridge in here. Oh, no, I've got it. Don't you worry. Here we go. Oh, snap. Oh, snap. Oh, snap.

Oh, snap. Yeah, see, this is good. Come out to this. Oh, snap. All right, everybody. Oh, snap. Wellington, make some noise. Dude, dude. This is nice. She's parked the car. Yeah, and you noise. Dude, dude.

That's fine. She's parked the car. Yeah, and you can talk over this bit. She's ready to make you laugh. Welcome to the stage, Janie Spro. Welcome to the gloves episode. And I slept with her in 2003. Yeah, great.

Well, if you're coming to my show. I met them in the recording studio because she was doing Where Is The Love? Just a bit of background. And then she pissed in your lounge and you were like, this can't be. And then she pissed in your lounge and you thought, oh my God. Okay, well, if you're coming to the Wellington show

Wednesday tonight, I'm going to walk out, I'm going to intro myself in a South African accent and I'm going to come out to London Bridge. That's my promise to you. Somebody said they're coming on Saturday. What accent are they going to get? We'll decide on Friday.

Yeah, okay. We'll decide each day. Okay, so every day we decide what accent is going to be? We'll decide on Friday. Yeah. Okay. We'll decide each day. Okay, so every day we decide what accent is going to be. Fun. Yep. Cancelled. Hayley Sproul cancelled. I'll do whatever is tasked to me.

Play. ZM. Fletch Vaughan and Hayley. Guys, guys, guys, guys. Okay. I started off my bra journey. A little context. I have always had a small breast

I've always been a small breasted woman ever since I was a teenager and I hated it and then what I did was to fix that I decided to gain 30 kgs okay now will this work in my department

that I'm somewhat no my friend no no no why no no you need a real fat area and it doesn't. Damn it.

I'm sorry. No, I know. If that wasn't planned for guys, guys would just be eating all the pies. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So what I did is I put on 30 kgs. And I tell you what, some of it went to the breasticles. And then I had to start wearing proper bras. Because as an itty bitty, you can kind of rock around in whatever,

something kind of crap. But when you've got a set of kahungas, you've got to really look after them. And so I thought I found my favourite bra. Remember when I told everyone and everyone went out and bought it? It's a great bra. I remember you were getting messages for weeks after. Weeks and weeks and weeks. And I still recommend that bra,

but I was starting to feel like I needed a little bit more support. And then so I bought another bra and then I talked about that. And I said, I'm wearing this bra. This is a really great bra. But again, it didn't have any support. Then I was advertised this bra and I'm just going to, this is non-spawn. I paid full price. The Nala bras.

Now I know so many girls are going to be like, N-A-L-A. Like Nala from the Lion King? Yeah, yeah. It sounds like it would be trademarked by Disney. Nala. No, because isn't it a Swahili word for something? Oh, okay. Well, the thing that has blown my mind is those other two bras,

I'm all about comfort. I'm not here to wear a sore underwire bra. Life's too short for that. I'd rather have them down by my knees than do that. It means queen. Okay. Nala means the queen. This is how I feel today.

You feel like a queen. Okay. Nala means the queen. This is how I feel today. You feel like a queen. I was advertised the mesh balconette bra from Nala on Instagram, hashtag influenced, right? That's what makes me a bra influencer. And it looked nice, just a mesh bra, very simple, very easy. And I was like, okay, I'm going to get two. I bought one in black and one in another colour. They arrived yesterday.

What was the other colour and why didn't you say it? Because it's red. This is a bit sexy. Should have just said two bras. I wouldn't have even. Should have said peach. Yeah. Yeah, I wouldn't have even questioned it. Skin toned.

Skin toned. It's red. It's red. Racy red. Racy red. Wow. So I bought this bra and I've put it on today the first time and I'm just not gatekeeping.

There is nothing more to say than you have to get this bra, mesh balcony bra from Nala. It is so comfortable and it's got an underwire and I cannot, I showed the girlies before, I showed Carwin and Shannon and it's completely see-through. So they got a bit of nip. Yeah. It's see-through. Completely. There's the mesh. Oh, okay. And that's all it is, is mesh, the whole shebang?

Yeah. Why? You look so supported and the shape shape because if you ever do a mesh sometimes it you have nothing to you and you've got everything to you. It looks great. They're phenomenal.

How's it going to hold up on the treadmill? Fletch is just like he's not looking at Shannon when she's talking because obviously when you're talking about breasts

and Hayley is grabbing hers of course the eye is immediately drawn to it and then you look at the other people talk about it and you can't help but look at theirs. And so Fletcher's just like. I was shaking a jar for nearly an hour this morning and I was hyper aware of that. Yeah.

Can you be a gentleman and look me in the tits, please? My nips are down here, Hayley. My nips are down here, please. Do me the honour. When someone's blind and they aren't quite looking at the person talking. Yes, just off to the side. So that's what Fletchers look like. I will say you will not be running a marathon in this bra,

but it's not its use. It's a daily bra. It can go under a t-shirt. Honestly, I feel, it feels like I'm not even wearing anything, but I've got an underwire on. And honestly, I went to the bathroom before and I was like, Why is she wearing a wire? She's spying on us.

She's with the feds. And I'm listening to you. She's listening. My question is, is there a lump where the nipple is? Because it's not super thick. Yeah, guys absolutely hate. I don't have a lumpy nipple. Guys hate being able to see a nipple through a shirt.

They hate it. I just check with the committee. Because Mesh is quite thin. I did get cold before, and yes, you will see. But that's fashionable. Thank you for not gatekeeping. Mesh Balconet Bra Nala. Honestly, it's the most comfortable bra.

You should get a discount code. Well, if I get one, I'll bloody share it. How much? Some message is in. Some people are asking. How much? View your order. Not expensive for a bra.

This is going to feel expensive to you guys because you don't have knockers. But sometimes. Surely bras are $10. A bra is $10. $59 each. That is so affordable for a bra that is this comfortable. I'm going to wear it every day. I'm literally going to order every colour.

You can get pink. Until we go on air next year and you're like, girls, I'm feeling the best. That's all right. She's stepping more towards comfort. This is... It's phenomenal.

I feel incredible. People said, oh my God, I wear them. Best thing ever. It's the best. Also great for the plus size girlies yeah yeah they have much size

I'm a 14DD and they I turn myself from a B to a double D you got a double D yeah babes congratulations I think they're going down

they're shrinking a little bit these are the batteries aren't they yeah double D's yeah double D's that's a big ass battery I'm just those tiny ones that are in like car keys

yeah and stuff yeah the discs CR2032. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm a tiny disc. But they're very size inclusive, this brand.

So if you've got the biggies and smallies. There's no underwire option, so no cut in, but still feel supported. Someone said, this is the review I needed. I've all confirmed my order. Fletch called me a bra fluencer before. Someone said you're an influent bra. Influent bra. Influent bra. I think that's already taken by bros

the finance bros Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley Fact of the day day, day, day, day If that sounded extra good, it was because Fletch was conducting the whole thing like a... A conductor. Yeah, with my knife. Like an orchestra.

With a knife. He is the conductor of the show, isn't he? He's conducting. He's leading. But he was also threatening us with a knife. It is Owl Week at Fact of the Day, and I've heard from some people who also love owls. I feel like I might start a club.

What, all two of them? Yeah. All two? What do you mean, owls? No, people. Oh, no? Oh, I love Owl Week. Somebody yesterday said it was almost like Calendar Week. Yeah, someone said this harks back to Calendar Week.

Which I thought might have been a bit rough because I do love owls. No, I'm loving it actually, Vaughn. I sort of felt like I was slipping into a pile on there, but I'm loving it. It's just my natural instinct to bully you. No, I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's actually fair enough. I'm a beta cuck that deserves it. He loves to be negged. And then I thought, not today. Vaughn doesn't need it today. He doesn't need it today. Today's fact of the day is about a very specific owl rather than owls in general

You're so hot Vaughan Hey Should I put on my elbow hair Oh my god Okay Sidebar Sidebar Maybe we'll digress

I know you said We don't have time But there's no rules It's our show It's our show We'll do what we want Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley That's us

There's a movie coming out It was filmed in New Zealand It's like a post-apocalyptic Horror movie Called Forgive Us All Now a little while ago I heard from Katie Who does their PR

And she said, I immediately thought of you because the movie company's idea for a promo is they're going to send people cowboy hats. And I was like, I love cowboy hats.

I've got a Cobra hat. Yeah. And I said, oh, great. I will say I've got a really big head. So what brand is it? And she said,

it's a Stetson. Which even I know. We've talked about John Stetson. That's what all the cowboys wear. We've talked about John Stetson. Remember, he moved the cowboys wear. We've talked about John Stetson. Remember, he moved to New Mexico for a drier, cleaner air because he had tuberculosis.

And he's like, why are these guys not wearing hats with bigger brims? So he made one and one cowboy wore it. And then everybody was like, I've got to have one. I've just been delivered a Stetson. That's cowboy influences. That's cow fluencing. Cow fluencing. Hat fluencing.

I've just been given a Stetson. Weird, because Hayley and I weren't I put this on and I'll say hearts were a flutter I didn't even know perfect it's a 60

it's a 62 centimetre with a soft stretch on it so it fits my 63 centimetre head it's a big head it's a big head and I put it on and hearts were a flutter I felt confused

well yeah Hayley felt tingles and then I sat down in a chair and then made Vaughan walk over and take his belt off anyway so I'll put that there carry on please I sat down in a chair and then made Vaughan walk over and take his belt off. Anyway, so. I'll put that in there. Carry on, please.

I can't remember what we said. Talk about it. I saw it. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Okay. No, it's because we were negging you and then I paused to say I wanted to say a nice thing. Oh, yeah. So you said hot. I said you're hot.

Yeah. It's because I think the hat's doing a lot of the heavy lifting on the hot. Yeah, it is. You're a minger. There we go. That's better. Keep going. Now we're back to the negging. There we go. That's better. Keep going, keep going. There we go.

God, that's got better. So it's about the eastern screech owls of Texas, which is where you'd probably wear a Stetson hat to keep the sun off your face while you're out there riding on your horse. They will bring... Ooh, yuck. It's a big-ass owl, eh? That one looks a bit like...

Ooh, yuck. Like it's a scary owl. It's gone through a bloody shredder. Owls fit into two categories, Hogwarts and nightmares. Yes, yes, yes. Like owls are a... In fact, we're going to cover this... They're either super cute or not at all.

Yeah, we're going to cover this later in Owl Week about different cultures and how owls are represented and what they represent. But the eastern screech owl in Texas will bring Texas blind snakes to their nest. Now, you might be thinking, you don't want a snake in your nest because the snakes eat eggs.

Especially if they're blind. Yeah. They'll start lashing out at everybody. What's happening? What's happening? So, Texas blind snakes. I can fly? Because they gently carry them back

and they become the housekeeper of the owl's nest. With things like bugs... A maid! Yeah, a maid. A blind maid snake. Kind of like enslaving though, isn't it? It does fit for the Jews. Because they can't get out of the nest because it's like high-sided. How do they know they can't get out? They don't eat the owl.

No, they don't eat the owls because they're small. Because they're blind. They feed on more things like bugs, ants and termites which do cause a problem for owls. And so they basically at the bottom of the nest, the snakes move into the basement basically and when the bugs are in there and fall through, the snakes just

eat the bugs and the parasites and keep the nest like super clean. The owls, owl chicks in the nest with the snakes and it grew faster, had better survival rates and bred more prolifically when they finally left the nest with the snakes, and it grew faster, had better survival rates, and bred more prolifically when they finally left the nest. And then what would they do with the snake when they're finished?

It's up in the nest or it's below the nest on the ground? Well, it just lives in the base of the nest, I guess. Right. You know, maids get old and you need a new maid, so you might tip them out the tree. You might take it out with your owl claw and just be like, hey, thanks. Hey, thanks. And either toss or up. Thanks for what? What with your owl claw and just be like, hey, thanks.

Hey, thanks. And either toss or pop. Thanks for what? What's happening? What's happening? What's happening? Boom. Gone. Bye.

I don't know. We're going to hit the ground because I can't see it coming. I can't see. I'm blind. Bang. It hits ground. Did you see, speaking of snakes, the guy in the news this week that's been bitten or injected with snake venom 200 times.

Oh, to make himself immune to it. To make himself immune and to make a vaccine for all snake venom going forward. Putting his body on the line. Yeah, so they reckon they're going to be able to, from this guy, make a vaccine. An antidote. An antidote.

Yeah. But you'd get it injected. So if you were walking around Australia or whatever and the snake bites you, you're just like, because you're immune, bring it on. That's amazing know they inject horses with snake venom to create the antibodies that make the antidote

as a whole I listened to a podcast about it I'm sure he did you need to get out more and he doesn't want to come out to our parties I know I can't I'm busy I'm listening to a podcast about snake antivenom and how it's made and how expensive and how like it's very time intensive.

So this guy, what a gem. What a gem. I would award him gem of the day. Thank you. What a gem. We thank him for his service. Yeah, we certainly do. So today's fact of the day

is the eastern screech owls in Texas have blind snake housekeepers. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Hayley. A man by the name of John. Great man's name. Great man's name. It's my dad's name. I trusted John immediately.

It's a solid name. G'day, mate. John. I'm like, oh, God, I feel good. Yeah. I dad's name. I trusted John immediately. It's a solid name. G'day, mate. John. I'm like, oh, God, I feel good. Yeah. I feel good being around you, John. For the last 38 years, he has monitored parking meters in Napier. Wowza.

He gives out the tickets if you are not paying for it. Imagine the change he's seen in 38 years. 87. 1987, did he start? Yeah, it would have gone from, like, coin-operated meters to, like, you know, the things we use now. The boop. The boop.

Or the app. You're just an app now. We're just the app. Some councils have the, like, they look like landmines in the middle of the car park, and they know if a car's parked there. Yeah. And then if you exceed your time, they just pull you.

No, they blow up. They are landmines. They blow up. They're time mines. So in 38 years, he must have dished out some tickets. No, they blow up. They are late noise. They blow up. They're time mines. So in 38 years, he must have dished out some tickets. Dude, he must have given out some tickets. Imagine the abuse.

Oh, no. He'd have a, it'd be water off a duck's back now. He would have heard it all. Oh, yeah. I've definitely run after a car park person, like when they're at my car doing the thing, and be like,

please, please, please, please, please, but I've never abused them. Light slap. It was 1986. A light slap. No, please, please. But I've never abused them. Light slap. It was 1987. A light slap. No, obviously we jest. Oh my God, no. Be nice to people.

February 1987, he had just lost his quality control job after the sudden closure of the Whakatū Meatworks. Oh. And he reckoned he'd make a nice chop there. Keep going. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good cut on that chop.

We like our chops a little bit thicker down here. Nice mince. We'll let that pass. Yeah, good mix of muscle to fat on that chop. We like our chops a little bit thicker down here. Nice mince. We'll let that pass. Yeah, good moolie. Good mix of muscle to fat. You've got to have fat in your mince. You've got a good tight sausage there, Steve. Yeah, lovely taper on the tip.

Oh, bit of a half-filled sausage. Take that off. Loose link, loose link. You've got to give a couple more twists on the old sauce. He reckoned he'd never seen a parking meter before he started. Oh, really? Because he grew up in the country. Oh, right. I mean, I'd never seen a parking meter before he started. Oh, really? Because he grew up in the country. Oh, right.

I mean, I'd never... Just park where you want. Yeah, just... So he's done this interview with the news media. Has he said, like, how much abuse he's got in the years? Because surely...

He'd be daily. Every day. He said that he's... He said he's heard it all, but he doesn't kind of go into the abuse side of things. He's just like, it's about traffic

and pedestrian safety he walks 16 to 17 kilometres a day oh wow great for the health he said and I get two pairs

of shoes each year now I hope some local shoe provider far be it from me as a network broadcaster to muddy the waters of local radio

yep someone needs to get this man a lifetime supply of shoes from a local shoe retail that's great we can make this our mission. He's retired now, so you're a bit late.

I reckon you'll still be walking. What about some nice slippers for him to put up his feet? Yes. Oh, lovely. Nice, like high-end sheepskin slippers to put up his feet. Put your feet up, my son. On the back of this, we want to know if you listening now have to deal with members of the public being mean to you. Are they mean to you because of your job?

Because I know ages ago we've talked about people that work in call centres and talk to people. Oh, yeah. And just some of the stuff they deal with. People in retail. I mean. People are just rude. Sometimes when my PT would put extra plates on, I'd be like, you bitch. Stop it.

And I'd abuse her. That's what you're paying her for, Hayley. I'd be like, shut up and Hayley. She'd be like, shut up and thrust in. I'd be like, you awful, awful woman. And then I got a great dump

around. Yeah, I know. And so I said, I'm so sorry for the way I spoke to you in that moment. I wasn't myself. There was some gain.

But you think any, any customer facing job, you're going to get abused from people. Someone says, does having kids count? No, no.

They are abusive little customers, aren't they? But again, you bought that on yourself. Yeah. You did that. But then you got the job. You could say you opted to have a job. Yeah. It's not one you can just leave though, is it?

Although some people do. We don't get direct sort of meanness really our way. I mean, people could message in if they wanted to. Well, they do sometimes. Vaughan just tells them to get lost. Well, they do sometimes. And just, Vaughan just tells him to get lost. Yeah, he does tell you

to get lost and don't even bother. In a nice way. You know, in a terrible way, if you message in something on the text machine and I'm not in the right mood,

I'll tell you to F off. You'll get the whole word. I love that. You'll get the whole word. Yeah. Okay, 0800DARLS.M. Call us now, text through 9696.

Are members of the public mean to you in your job? We want to know if Are members of the public mean to you in your job? We want to know if members of the public are mean to you in your job. Yeah. How long did you be working? 38 years as a parking warden in Napier. Retired now. Anonymous joins

us. Are members of the public mean to you, Anonymous? Hi. Yes, they are. But not all of them. Okay. Why would people be mean to you? I work in consumer care for a pet food company. So we deal with quality concerns and pet owners love their pets dearly,

which is wonderful to hear, but it does go to next level sometimes. I was going to say that passion bubbles over into some anger and meanness. And I know best. What do they get angry about? All types of things. They can't read feeding guides, how much to feed their animals. My animal doesn't like it. You name it, we've heard it.

That sounds like a them problem. Yeah, it does. Again, a reason I couldn't work in customer service. I'd just be like, what's your problem? How would you like me to fix that for you, Sarah? Yeah, I'd be very snarky. Has it ever made you cry, though, at work? Or gone home after a day of work just feeling miserable?

I've got big shoulders. And I guess not my circus, not my monkeys. But yeah, we have a wonderful team that we kind of debrief, have a chuckle. And we're here to help and be there for their pets and be their voice. But there are some that take it to the nth degree. Yeah, too far. Okay. But yes, I could probably battle a cop for a good work story from half the things I hear on a daily basis.

Wow. Okay. People need to remember this when they're calling, you know, a 0800 line. Anonymous thank yous and messages. My mum's a parking warden. She's been stalked in the streets and abused like nothing we've ever experienced because she's had her work colleagues attacked in the street.

It's absolutely horrific. Yeah. Isn't that terrible? And also, there's no defence because you are the one not paying for parking or parking in a disabled spot or a loading zone. That's right. Like, you literally have no comeback. Yeah, exactly.

You've stuffed up. All they're doing is letting you know that. My husband's a greenkeeper on a golf course and people are constantly horrible to him. He's had multiple people hit balls towards him while he's mowing. That could kill him. You know when you're at the driving range, you want to hit the mower.

That's a different, because that thing's encased, right? That thing's got all the safety. Is it because they're getting in the way of people's games? I don't know, but it's horrible. How do they think the golf course stays a golf course without a man mowing the golf course? They're trying playing golf in footlong grass. Oh, I know.

Like Vaughan's lawn the other day. Please don't bring up when my lawn was long. I was so embarrassed. I almost couldn't drive down the driveway. Fletch, it was awful. I was so embarrassed. A resident complains to the council about flooding in their street. Council contact us to come and fix it.

We go to fix it. Resident had a fat rage about the fact that about flooding in their street. Council contact us to come and fix it. We go to fix it. Resident had a fat rage about the fact that we're blocking the street. It's always the ones that complain about the flooding in the street that then complain about the flooding in the street being cleaned up by the big truck that cleans up floods in the street. How would you like me to do that? Yeah. We aren't bothered by it anymore.

We let them bring the energy. You want to have a calm conversation? Sweet as. You want to yell and swear at me? That's actually my favourite. Yeah, let's get into it. Please go ahead. Keep your texts coming in. 9696 to yell and swear at me? That's actually my favourite. Yeah, let's get into it. Please go ahead. Keep your texts coming in. 9696

0800 dials at M. When are members of the public mean to you? A parking warden's retired in Napier after 38 years. The things he would have heard. Yeah. So some messages in. I can't go into what I do, but my prior career in healthcare was pretty challenging, especially during COVID. Frequently abused, threatened and insulted, despite the

fact that we were there to literally help them. To save our lives. Have we had a lot of messages from like, emergency or yeah, kind of like, I would have thought emergency workers or just like ER nurses or just nurses in general. How long is the wait? And you're like, well, someone's dying in there.

So do you want to bump them off the table or what? I spent the last nine years working in winery, cellar doors and have met so many great people. However, I would always get given the worst customers because I was the manager. Having full grown men yelling at a young female because you've cut them off from their booze

because they're too drunk is not really fun. Oh, yeah. But bouncers and stuff, they'd get it out. Oh, yeah. I'm not that drunk. Yeah. Supermarket duty manager, I've been threatened with, like my life has been threatened.

What? Because you wouldn't sell them a cask wine after 10. They don't say what calls the other duty manager. Before 10. Before 10. Yeah. What? I'm making a casserole.

I need a cask wine. Are you making a casserole? I'm making a casserole. Oh, is that what it's for? Who does what? Give me a cask wine for a casserole. Yeah, that was really, like Christmas time, you'd get threatened. Yeah.

That's so bad. It's actually sad the amount of, I saw a sign, I forget where I was the other day. It's like a sign like, our people are people, be nice to them. Oh, I know, you have to ask. These reminders of us to be nice to staff. Well, let us remind you today to be nice to everyone you encounter today. Let me tell you. Shut up. I said, shut up. Let me tell you. Shut up.

Shut up. Excuse me? I work in liquidation. Everyone, including your co-workers and genuine friends. Sorry, I thought you meant people in customer service. No. Sorry, Hayley. Thank you.

Fawn? Sorry, you dumb. I work in liquidation. Liquidation? Yeah, that's not handing out drinks. That's where you go into a company that's had a failing of sorts. Take all their things. Take all their stuff and sell it.

People sort of forget that we didn't personally force them to put their child's university fund into a company and then the director did some dodgy stuff and ran off to Morocco with all their money and a mistress. Wait, hang on. That seems targeted. That seems very specific. Very specific.

It is super sad sometimes and a lot of people do say sorry but only after they've yelled at me for like 15 minutes but God, the stories I have are worth it. They're crazy. Liquidation is the opposite of boring. Yeah.

How do you get into liquidation? Do you have to be good with numbers and stuff like accounting and stuff? Yeah, I'd say so. And then just really good at selling stuff. I'm a case manager at work and income. I've had a pen thrown at me, my computer knocked off my desk,

had clients threatened to kill me, been spat at. Just as well public servants are overpaid, right? Ha, ha, ha. When I was on the benefit. Same. I was on the benefit. Morning over on the benefit once. Yeah, I was on it twice.

We've all been on the benefit. This one we're at the edge. They didn't pass enough. Yeah, you need to top it up. We needed the topper. We needed the wind stopper. We needed the topper. She had a little bit of fun.

They are. And there was a mark in the desk. And I was like, what happened here? And she's like, oh, did you not see the news? This is where the guy went crazy with the machete. And I was literally two days later at the desk. That's when they started doing like armed security guards at Wins. Yeah, it's horrible.

And they're there to help people. They are there to help people. Shiver me timbers. I'm a cop. What are you? I'm a cop. I'm a cop. Shiver me timbers.

Somebody messaged in saying, I'm a cop. I have been called every combination of insults you can possibly ever imagine. Oh, I just read some of the ones they sent in. Yeah, I can't read them out. Oh, you can't even read them out? No, one of them's really... Think of the worst ones. Rhyme them.

Can we rhyme them? No. No! I'm just checking. Imagine if you did insult a police officer and then they started crying. You'd be like Oh Oh sorry

Sorry sir They would have heard it all though Oh disgusting Yeah I work in road works I get abused on the daily We're just trying to We're just trying to

Fit to a stupid road mate But There are a lot of people Just standing around doing nothing Now the lollipop people I always wave at them Every time You have to

Do you want to wave at them now Oh no I don't know I don't think I always wave at them. Every time. You have to. Do you want to wave at them now? Oh, no, I don't know. Well, not that one. I don't think I am. Was that a bit angly? My heart goes out to you. That was a bit Elon Musk-y, that one. Right, it was a bit.

Yeah. Just a little flick of the hand. Loosen the fingers. Yeah, see, I don't even try that. That's when you're a white guy with a shaved head. You've got to be pretty careful what angle you hang on. Loosen it down more. But the road workers can't win

because we're all moaning about the potholes and the not enough lanes and then they build them and we're angry that they're fixing it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's because they're all bike lanes. Oh, okay, Hosking. Georgia Hosking's up next

with some hot right wing takes. Stay tuned. Stay tuned. It's fixed. Oh, now we're sitting fixed. She's doubling down. She's doubling down. She's doubling down. I'll cycle home on the road then, Georgia.

Maybe I won't be here tomorrow. Yeah. Hey. Oh, I'm busting for a wheeze after that podcast, I'd take your enemies in front of God.