ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - November 24th 2025

Episode Date: November 23, 2025

On today's episode of the Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Big Pod, what was your brutal nickname and what odd place did you get take on a first date? The Batman effect Tourists are screwing up reviews Tool's phone ban Top 6 - Thing that happened while Grinder was down The 2026 travel destination  Hinge Wrapped Hayley's Taylor Swift dance Brutal nicknames Vaughan went shopping with teenagers Where did they take you on the first date Fact of the day Chris Parker Interview SLP - Have you decided on a New Years Resolution yet? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM Podcast Network This is... Fleshwon and Haley's Big Pod Thanks to animates, making happy happen for pets. Good morning, Fleechforn and Haley Brin's... Do you say Brin, normal newsreader, regular newsreader Brin, is in Sydney or Australia somewhere

he was holding a koala. I'm not supposed to hold them, Brin. I'll be calling him out for that. Wait, he might have been posing next to it. I don't want to get Brin cancelled. I think he was posing next to it. I think only Brisbane is the last state in which they let you hold them. Otherwise, it's a bit, you know, riding on an elephant.

And pot kettle black, I've done that twice. Yeah, I did it, but it was... You've had a sedated tiger next year. It was 2000s. And a sedated tiger was two thousands as well. We've all done it. Okay, he's at Toronto Zoo. And he's standing next to a tree.

Yeah, yeah. And have they glued that koala onto the tree? Yeah, yeah, it's fakes. Taxi Dermint. I'm so jealous. They're my favourite animal. I know. What takes our boy Brin to Australia?

Well, maybe he's just having a holiday. What are you going to do? We're going today on a business trip. We are going today, yeah. Or not I are going on a business trip to Sydney today. It's Bush. It's Bush. Yeah, well, look.

Tomorrow. I love Sydney. You'll be in charge. So, okay, this is what I think we should do as well, maybe at some points today. And we'd be like, Fletch for and Haley and Zem that was somber, 12 to 12. It's three minutes past six. It's so clunky. What you're going to do?

Oh, you're going to be doing that. Oh, you're going to do it a little warm up. Oh, yeah, okay. Well, we're doing a girls only show because. girls were all boys drool and I think I'd like to have a little go of doing the back announcing of the song

I'd like to have a little go I've been here four years now We can let you do that Okay yeah maybe just for a little bit Okay Yeah Coming up on the show it's the top six Yeah what are you going to give us

For the top six today boy Top six things that happened while Grindr was down Oh okay yeah right Nice The Fletchborn and Haley Big Pod Sometimes I do think that sign and people that run these sort of big, deep studies

might have a little bit too much time on their hands. You know what I mean? Because then you read a study, i.e., the one I'm about to share with you now, called the Batman effect. And you think, oh. How did we land on doing this? But wait, that sounds exciting.

Yeah, I love Batman. It is exciting. Okay, so here, the study was, the question they were asking in this study, does something surprising, i.e., seeing someone dressed as Batman, make people more likely to help others. The way that they tested this, the researchers,

they rode the Milan Metro, bonjourno, 138 times. They set up a situation in which a woman pretending to be pregnant, so she's got obviously a pillow up there. A woman pretending to be pregnant got on the train. I don't know if I'd give up my seat for a woman with a lumpy pillow. You can tell out. How good is the pregnancy?

Is it like a balloon? Yeah. Like maybe it's a movie or a TV It'll be a movie ballet A Silicon movie ballet Okay She was she got on the train And half of the rides

Yeah A man dressed up as Batman Would walk into the train Okay Didn't interact with her or anyone else He was just present Okay Lurking

Was he looking menacing He was looking like Batman He was always I'll say always menacing Okay I had a nightmare about Batman When I was about four years old And I still remember every second of it Like it was one of those things

And his little ears were like poking up in the mirror and I looked across the room and I could see him in the mirror Was it George Clooney Batman? No, it was Michael Keaton for sure. Oh, okay, so no nipples. Would have been so much scary

if it was nipple Batman. If it was nipple Batman, I wouldn't know what to do. So in half the rides, this Batman presence enters the train and observers of the researchers watch to see if anyone offered the pregnant woman a seat. That's how they conducted this research. Right, with and without Batman.

With Batman present and with Batman not present, 50-50. Yeah. With Batman present on the train 67% of passengers offered the pregnant woman a seat when Batman was not present only 38

suggesting that the presence of Batman or something surprising Okay if that was Say that was someone dressed as the Easter Bunny It would do the same thing No but I don't think it would Because Batman is an authoritative figure Yeah he is the darkness

I would have liked to have seen this study and maybe we need to conduct it again with a softer character. Yes. Because they're saying what this means is an unexpected event may wake people up from autopilot. So they're just sitting there on the train,

on their phone. They don't even noticing Miss Prego. Right, okay. Whereas the moment you go, why is it Batman dude here? Then you're more likely to be a bit more aware of your surroundings. And you're like, oh, there's a pregnant woman

all off of my seat. Right, okay. So, and they said once that kind of starts to take effect, why the numbers were so much bigger is that then it'll spread socially. So when people start sort of noticing things, we're all becoming a little bit more alert and aware that this pregnant woman doesn't have a seat

influencing people around them. So they're saying like other, it could be other things, street performances, playful art, unusual signs, things that just kind of shock us out of like, I'm on the train, I get the thing, I get my dad, I go to work, I get on the thing. But then, have you ever been on like

the New York subway or the subway where the performers come in and they're busking? Shut up. And people are just, and people, the locals are just like, they're not even looking. Like, they know what... Oh, yeah, because if you look, you've got to pay. Yes, if you've got to look, you're going to put something in the hat.

That too, so maybe that doesn't work everywhere. They have noted their limitations, only tested on one city's metro, so the people of Milan. Yeah. And then, yeah, Batman himself might have been an influence on how people all feel. Because as you say, he's a hair of figure, and he's an ominous presence. Well, maybe if you are pregnant and needing a seat, you could just make a scene when you get on the train or the bus. No, I think if you're pregnant, if you put on the Batman mask. A pregnant Batman.

Whoa. We haven't seen that yet. Pregnant Batman. I'd imagine the online community would take that quite well. I really, really enjoy this study. I know. The internet would take a Batman being a woman or Batman being a pregnant man would sit well with them.

I think no one would say a single thing about it. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flashawn and Haley. You're just booking a restaurant? I am just booking a restaurant. It's a friend's birthday. next Tuesday and I'm going nice. And do we always look

at the ratings? I've gone on Metro, Metro Top 50. But if you're in a town or so, even locally, do you if you've never been to the restaurant, do you look at the Google reviews? Always. Yeah, same. Always. And Google

review photos. Yeah. I was doing the real food. I was doing that at the weekend looking for coffee. Because you know, you don't want a milky. I don't want a milky mokka. Oh my God, and Mount Manga Nui the other day. I'll call it out. I had the worst. I I'm iced oat milk latte of my life. It was an iced oat milk with coffee.

Like, coffee. Like, she sneezed a dribble of coffee in it. Can I just bounce back to when Fletchee doesn't want a milky moccuccino? I don't want a milky milkie milk. Sometimes there's no chocolate or no coffee in there. I just want my macheteer to be chocked full of chalky. Yeah, I just want it to be constantly sludging with chocolate. It is milk.

I want it chocolatey and I want it coffee. I want it now, Danny. But with the coffee's not strong enough and all you taste is milk. I know, yeah, that's exactly what I was. So I was like looking at ratings and I was like, because I was away out of town and yeah, I mean, it was so perfect.

Where are you doing? What are you doing? Why are you keeping secrets? That's turning old Shifty. That's none of your business. Wow. That is actually none of your business. Shell shock over here.

When I leave here at the weekend, my life is not your business. Shifty shell shop from crazy towns over here. Come my baby, come my baby. What I do in my own time is my business. Wow, okay. The reason I, you just make. It's going to get way more of a deal. Look, I mean, you've got me on fine friends.

You know exactly where I am. I would have forgotten you were going there, and I was like, say what? You're so far away. I knew. And the reason I ask about the ratings is because there's been a study done, and it's found that tourists give restaurants and places higher reviews than locals. And so it's this thing called tourist bias. Yeah, because you're on holiday.

And money's not real. Yeah, exactly. And you're happy because you're happy because you're. don't have a job. We're away. For like two weeks you're on holiday. You don't have to think about anything. So you get a shit pizza and you're like, man, look at the view.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is different. Yeah. And so they've worked out. They've done a big study. They reckon that tourists are 13.4% more likely than locals to give restaurants a higher online rating. Traveler reviews are shorter, more emotional and have more photos. And it's tourist bias.

It is upping the level of your restaurant or your place. It makes sense. I totally get it. Yeah. Like, I, like, everyone, you know, my parents live in Italy. When I go, I was like, the food must be incredible. But they live in this tiny village, you're like, no. But it feels incredible because it's warm.

You're away from home. There's a foreign language happening. Yeah, yeah. It's a beautiful Italian man. You'd give it five stars because you're like, oh my God, this is cute. This is so cute. Yeah. And that's actually just quite a stale bit of bread with, you know, e-fall on it.

Yeah. Did you find a machinna that wasn't milky? Did you find a strong rocker? Yeah, it was all right. It was okay. It was okay, yeah. They don't do coffee like we do coffee. No, I know they don't.

Australia. Australia doesn't know. They're like, oh yeah, Melbourne's like the capital. Coffee culture. You're like, no. But it's their dairy. It's their second rate dairy, I'd say so. It's their watery piss dairy.

Yeah, it's their piss dairy. The cows are just... It's half piss. Well, all the cows stopped being milked and weren't worked in the mines. Yeah. So they can go Fifo Barley. Yeah, so they can go Fifo veneer. plays

plays that ends flesh one and haley well I've had four hours sleep again but um worth every minute of that I went to tool last night it was it was one of the best concerts I've been to my life

it was art it was phenomenal I because I live near Spark Arena I know I looked up at your building when I was walking past and I was like hello and I it's funny because if I don't know what concerts on at Spark Arena I'll guess, and then I'll Google it.

Yeah, yeah, great. And quite, you know, sometimes you'll see if everybody's wearing, you know, like blue jeans, RMs, big belt buckles. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And everyone from Christchurch is here. What was the Doja Cat crowd like on last Tuesday? Young female? Right, okay.

Yeah, and gays. And this would have been older men, men, men. I looked out the window, because my friend was at my place at the time, I was like, oh my God, look at this. and it was a sea of black, everyone was wearing black, a black t-shirt. I was saying, it was a sausage fest, man. I was looking around, I was like, far out.

There's where I reckon like 15% women in and out of the bathroom, whereas I was like, I was waiting with my friend, and he was like in the queues, and I was like, welcome. Welcome to life. What was the age of the crowd? Because I just, Maynard James Keenan and the lead singer are till 61 years old.

Dude, the drummer, who is basically the hero of that band. Like, just amazing to watch. Yeah, 62, I think. It was just like Anyway, I won't harp on about the music Because not everyone loves it But it was beautiful, the concert And the moment everyone's talking about

Is what you experienced Yeah, so we got an email saying this That it is, they're not a phone ban But it was like a no phones policy And that you can't film with your phones And I was like, no one's gonna listen to that No, like 12,000 people here And we all wanna, it's just a knee jerk thing now

We just want to capture this moment and then never watch it again. I'm so bad at that. Oh, me too. Me too. And I do it. I did it at Metallic. I do it at every concert.

And then there were all these signs everywhere saying, be present, be in the now, you know, the tools a bit. Oh, my God. Really? It's like, they're very, but it's like classy. But are they like bog and hipsters or, no, boge and hippies? No, they're not hippie. You know, kind of hippies.

They're just like super alternative. And then, so there all these signs, and then there was this big voiceover thing that was like the band has asked. that there is no filming and then they come out and they did a couple of songs and there was no cameras and I was like interesting and then the lead singer Maynard came out and he was like

just be present with us that's all we ask and I'll let you film the last song and I'll let you know and then you're like cool I've got my little clip and it was amazing like I was looking around all the seats were filled the whole place was sold out two nights and a row not a single person on their phone

everyone just like listening to the music what's that like it was so amazing because you were sort of like oh this rules yeah and then he was listening along there was no distraction and then when he said

oh he basically said put it in your pocket and if you don't have a pocket shove it up your ass right and didn't he say or I'll give you COVID again oh he did apologise he was like sorry about the whole

COVID thing that's right because the tool concert in 2020 was he had COVID and there was one in the mosh pit he had COVID the fourth person ever to have COVID was at the tool

concert yes in 2020 and they were like if you were in the mosh pit to the left of the stage. Yeah, I remember it. I remember it. He was like, soz, why are we talking about this?

Oh, yeah, so he'd said, yeah, basically shove it up your ass. And at the end, he said, you can take it out of your ass now. You can film this one. And then, like, all the screens went up. And you're like, oh, this sucks. Yeah. Because you just had two and a half hours, basically, without it. Yeah.

Oh, anyway, it's really giving me perspective, guys, actually. Oh, okay. Actually, my phone. Well, this morning, we're going to get our screen time. remind. Do you get it on a Monday morning? I turn mine off. I don't need that. I don't need to see that shit. Wait, but I thought you're in the now.

So what I'm doing actually though is I'm just reflecting in this moment and I'm just going to be in the now. I know when mine's like, you're down 3% this week so it was only seven hours a day. The ZAM Podcast Network. Play Zat M's Flashhorn and Haley.

From the unmoderated comment section, this is the top six. Well, according to Downdetector.ca, Grindr currently working without problems, but that wasn't always the way. Tim, I wish one of us had the app

and we could check if it was back up. No, no, if you're not familiar, Grindr is a homosexual dating app. Dating and quotations. It's kind of whatever you want it to be. There was a cloud flare system out, an outage, which affected many apps and websites. Or was it Friday?

Yes Leading into the weekend That's not when you want it You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying But it's back up and running now So it also took down X and chat GTPT

Chat Chat Chit I love Chat Chippity Tuesday It's a It's a software company And that software underpins Thousands of website

Like when we click on a link here Or I just clicked on a link in it had a cloud flare thing and it takes it's everywhere it's everywhere you flare up yeah not during a flare up well the top six things that happened when grinder went down okay is today's top six number six on the list people said grinder's gone down and everyone said on who number five in the list of the top six I mean that was a sitter boy yeah it was a sitter it almost happened before it was a sitter it was a sitter what almost happened before someone went down you kind of

No, no, no, Lee. That almost happened before. The joke almost happened before. Oh, it's like, congrats, man. So early in the morning. On a Monday. What a way to start the day. What a way to start the day?

Wow. In the bedding and hitting this news button. Number five on the list of the top six things that happened when Grindr went down. The gays mistakenly opened the yellow pages thinking it was analog grinder. It wasn't. Or was it? A lot of businesses on there. Or was it?

Someone called it the gay yellow pages. It's so funny. Gay yellow pages. Because the app's yellow pages. Yes. Oh, yeah, I just assumed everybody knew that. To explain that joke, because all good jokes need to be explained. Some people don't know it's yellow.

It's yellow. It's a yellow. It's a yellow app. I got it. It's good. It's good. And by the way, when I say the gays, I say it with only love and respect. Oh, yeah.

You're an ally. I'm an ally. Yeah, Vaughn's an ally. I would say the majority of your friends are gay at this point. I've seen Vaughn kiss a dude, but it was just, you know, it's a joke. Yeah. Actually, that's probably cancelable now. I was gay baiting.

Yeah, you were gay-baiting. You were Harry-styling us. I was Harry-stiling us. Kiss a man. I was gay-baiting. Yeah. Stop dating all these hot women and kiss a guy. Kiss a man.

Yeah, Harry. Got you. Got you. Got you. Got you say, gay-bader. Number four on the list of the top six things that happened when Grindr went down. The gays somehow made Facebook marketplace, the new hook-up app. I will give them one thing.

Resourceful. Yeah, man, they'll find a way. They'll find a way. Like life found a way, Andrewsick Park. The days we'll find a way when Grinder's down. Still for sale? Still for sale? No, Judge. Oh, this signed George Michael CD.

Still available at 10, 10 past 10? Yeah, at your place. Pickups only. Number three on the list of the top six things that happened when Griner went down. Public toilet graffiti just became handwritten grinder profiles. Oh, okay. Like the old days. Like old school.

Yeah. The profiles are quite heavily picture-based. Well, you just pin a picture of yourself on the wall. It's not really of yourself. with you. Oh, you could put that up on the wall, too, if you want it. Number two on the list of the top six things

that happened when Griner went down. Gay dudes just went straight. Turns out that was a little... No, they just got off. Oh, right, okay. The pub had a couple of beers. Oh, yeah, but they watched some footy. Just went straight. It was all that was needed.

Take away their technology. It's like when kids are naughty, you take away their screen time. I think that's the same form, but okay. Just went straight. And number one on the list of the top six things that happened when Griner went down, gay men just decided they'd go without for the weekend

and not get... He could even make it through. He could even say it. He could even say it. What are they going to do? Just sit around and do nothing? Yeah, as a... Come on.

Get a grip. That's so. Get a grip. Okay. Okay. You know what I'm saying. Okay. That is today's top six. The Z&M Podcast Network. 2025 was the year

that everyone went to Japan. Right? That was the travel destination that was predicted and I tell you what they were right on the money I feel like everyone this year was planning a trip to Japan went to Japan, has been thinking about going to Japan

as our friends in Japan and Alfred Spence is he just gone back there or is he just gone back there or is he? I can't keep up with him. He's just going to be airpoints on this one. Oh he's going to be airports what is the new one called? Black. Like you get to fly the plane

Kouru Black. You get to fly the plane Like because you're that you fly that much. It is weird that he flies that much but doesn't know how to fly a plane It's actually, it sort of doesn't make sense at that point. Yeah. So I was flicking through the Herald this morning.

Oh, congratulations. Congratulations. The company newspaper. It's my chosen news source. And I saw so many ads for early bird airfares for next year. Wow. To where? Anywhere.

What do you mean? What were the ones that they were predicted? I don't know, Auckland to Christchurch warn. Where do you think they're going to? Oh, God. Well, no, but she's about to tell us the year that where everyone's going next year. And I'm wondering if that, She's about to say married up with what you've predicted.

Where's the paper? I don't know. Down here, born. Any good sports news? The AB's played a good game of the weekend. Did they? Did they play? They won.

I don't think they won some. I think they won, but it said it master in adequacies. Really? Yes. Oh. Well, the wins a win at the end of the day, isn't it? Yes. This is the sound.

Just put an ASMR flicking through the paper. Here's one house of travel. 20% off. Great Southern. rail. Oh, you love trains, don't you? I've been sick, since I've come out as a full-blown train enthusiast, man, have I been getting sent some content. I've been invited to like steam journeys on trains. People are like, you can take a train from here to here. There's a lot of them out there.

Yeah. Okay, so no, this is mostly like cruises and stuff. Carry on these tours. There's more. Yeah. Cruises. No, no, no. I don't think this is going to be in there. So travel and leisure, you know, the website, the magazine. Yep. They named their destination. of the year. They're sort of prediction and then why they think that's going to happen

every year. This year we are going to... I mean, that accent could have been anything. Actually, I'm scared. Is it South America? Is it Europe?

Brazil! Brazil is amazing. Brazil is named travel lesbians destinations of the year for 2026. I think the lesbians would love Brazil.

Right, there was another ad for Airfist. Italy. Did that have any for Brazil? No, no. Italy. Why? We've got

We've got a Copacabana beach. We've got a whole bunch of beaches in the South Polar region. We've got festivals and events, Rio Carnival, in February. Yes, I'm just talking to some friends at the weekend that are going there in February for that. There's an October fest. There's another ad in the paper, but no Brazil. It's Asia. Oh, yeah, okay.

In Sao Pala, we've got Michelin Guide Restaurants. There's an ad for tickets to butter. What do you mean tickets to butter? Well, that's a travel ad for butter. It's not a, it's an ad for a... Travel and get butter. A supermarket or something. It's not every ad in here at travel out.

No, no, it's not. Because here's a gull lazing on a lazy boy couch. Oh. Well, they're saying Brazil's mix of beaches, festivals, food and natural wonders makes it the standout destination for 2026. I've never been. You want to, though. Vaughn, you've never been. I would love.

I don't know why this character's here. I'd get myself robbed or something silly, though. Yeah, you were drugged and robbed. How'd out of a gunpoint. God, we're leaving to go to Sydney today for the work trip. And Vaughn, it's stressing me out. I don't know if you... Now, do I need a passport to go to Australia.

Yes, you do. I don't think you'd handle South America. It's a bit... That much. It's a bit much for the board. It would be a lot. I'll just see what happens, you know? They've got trains.

Fing all the trains. The Z&M Podcast Network. Play ZDM's Fletchhorn and Haley. Every year, Hinge, I think maybe Tinder, you also do this. They sort of release a report of, you know, what we've been looking for over the year and what, It's my first year on the apps. Yes, it is.

How's my experience been? Do you get a wrapped in app? I don't know. Because, like, your Spotify and stuff, it's all in app, right? I'm only on three of them. I'm not on Hinge. Right, maybe you should do a breakdown of your wrapped of all the apps. Do you know what?

Shall I do that? I could do that for tomorrow for the girls' only show. Well, don't, what do you, why are you serving your premium content? Why are you saving your premium content for when we're on here? I find that very interesting. Did you just see that I had a. Girlies. We've got a great content idea for tomorrow, just for the girlies. This will be great.

We're going to dive into my personal dating rap. Also, you just said you're going to do it, and now all the other radio stations are doing it. They better not. I'll sue. We'll sue. Yeah, we've got cease and desisters up the wazoo. I reckon all the other radio stations have not had a dating year like I have. No, not at all. Cease and desisters would be a good band name for a guy with female backup vocalists.

That's really good. Hey, everybody, I'm Cease. And these are desisters. Well, they'll be afraid to join the girls tomorrow when Vaughn and I are away on a business trip in Sydney. I've got to start practicing doing the songs. Yeah, we'll do that later. We'll do that a little bit later.

Yeah, I don't know if there's a rap, but now I really hope that there is. How many people I've liked and how many bing, bing bong, bong, bong. Bing bing bong, bong. How many one bong bong, and how many. So one of the things that the Hinge report reporter was that Gen Z's are really struggling to open up. Okay.

When they're going on dates, they're saying that they're more hesitant than millennials to initiate deep conversation on a first date, so they keep it kind of surface. Whereas maybe it's because we're older, we're like, what are your goals in life? Do you want a family? What's your financial situation? Have you had therapy? Yeah, that's where I thought everybody went to because they want to cut to the chase. Because, you know, we had lockdowns in COVID, and so everyone's just like, life is short. Yes.

Do you want kids or not? We've just come for our coffee and we've known you 10 minutes. Yeah, yeah. So the pandemics have affected us differently. You're right. But with millennials, that's us. We missed a bit. We missed a bunch of we're older.

Yeah. So now, yeah, we're got to like, we've got to go. We've lost time. Whereas Gen Zs, they lost those formative kind of going out years. And so they're more shy, makes them less confident. Having conversations with strangers is harder. Yeah. They say 35% of all hinged daters are looking for deeper connection.

So not just your casual hookups. Because what was Hinge's, like, unique selling point? Was that it was more... It's a thousand questions. It's like I. Fill out a thousand questions. Yeah, and they do prompts on their things. I don't know.

I'm not on hinge. Okay. Because it's like... Well, why don't you tell us about the ones you're on? What is that about? Again, that'll be in the premium content idea that I had tomorrow. That's going to be tomorrow. Right.

I'll dive into the three apps. One of which is Tinder, one of which is more, um, overt, alternative, and one of which is for hot people in celebrities only. You're not allowed to talk about that one. Yeah, but I can do a little... You're not supposed to talk about that one, are you? Do you know who popped back up?

No, you shouldn't... You don't mute the thing. Oh, okay, tell us... We'll be back. Okay. No, have you ever put it down? The microphone is still off. You are a little shit.

No, they're not broadcasting on the radio. You are a little shit. No, I press this button and you'll still... Your mic will still work. You're going to get me kicked off, Rea, you little shit. What a salacious crumb. Okay, well, I'll turn it off. Who did you see on Rea?

See? No, I'm not doing it. Hang on. I'm saying who popped back up. You're running it down. Oh. Don't get her license, her Rea license revoked. They were back.

They've looped background. Oh, really? Oh, wow. And have you liked them? No. No. They're not anywhere near you. It doesn't matter.

to girlies want to know who you saw on Raya? The first one that you already know, the guy, you know, famous... I wish we could talk... Wait, what happens if we talk about it? I'll lose my membership. And then I have to go back on like Minga dating apps. With the common man.

Anyway, Gen Z using a lot of AI on their hinge profiles, that's no surprise. So they want deeper connections, but they're bullshit in their way with AI to make... To get conversations started, generate responses to questions from dates. It's not going to help because you're not going to have the actual chat in real life. No, I know.

Anyway, join us tomorrow for premium content where I do my own dating rap. I feel like that was my idea. Do you want us to wait? Nope. Tough bickies. You're getting a trip to Sydney. The Z&M Podcast Network. So on, I was touring around, I went to Nelson, then we went to Wellington, then went to Palmie.

to see seven days. Seven days live tour. We only got two more left. Yeah. Christchurch and the Tron. And had a great time. And Ben Hurley and I, lovely comedian,

great friend of mine, decided on Friday night after the show in Wellington, we were going to head out. Okay. Yeah, we're going to hit the clubs. We went up to do the little secret, you know, the rooftop bar?

Yes. It was too packed and loud. Friday night, no thanks. Because we usually go like a bit earlier in the day. Yeah, last time. I was there a couple of weekends ago and it was, yes, lovely in the sun. Yeah.

Lovely. So we went there, then we went to another bar. We were just sort of jumping around. His sister was there, her partner. And, um... Ben Hurley has a sister. Yeah. Does she just look like Ben Hurley?

Yeah, female Ben Hurley. Shorter. Just without a bed. This is without a bed. Just the dark hair. Yeah. So, and then we were like, uh, we're like, oh, we've got a Sanfran, which is like an icon of the New Zealand night scene in Wellington.

Yeah. And, um, it's a comedy venue. and lots of bands play there. Lots of bands play there. And so we were like, something will be on. And Ben's like, I know the bouncer. I'll be able to get us in and da-da-da-da. We get to the door of the bouncer and he's like,

oh, good-day, mate. He's like, can I get us all in? And the guy was like, yeah, but I don't really know if it's your scene. And Hulz was like, what do you mean? And he was like, you know what? Head on up. Have a good time. I didn't tell you.

I love this. Didn't tell us. It's sort of a mixed bag. Yeah. I walk in and it is women, pink, glitter. It is a Taylor Swift dance party. And I was like, ah, the girlies. Now, Ben Hurley has never looked more out of place in his life.

Yes. Almost like a dad waiting for his daughter to finish. Yeah, yeah. So it was... But he's gone in to find her. Yeah, that's exactly what it looked like. Girlies, you would have loved this. So it was a DJ playing excurs.

exclusively Taylor Swift everyone was dressed up in full like sequin tiny little dresses and dancing your best line

yeah I've been to one of these they're the best it was super super cool but I didn't belong there but did you feel the showgirl energy entering your veins did you feel shiny and sparkly did you feel empowered

not so much hang on I'm just looking for photos are you do you have video proof That's everyone singing out That's everyone singing I would have actually I'd pay money just to have seen Ben Hurley's face

Yeah, they do Yeah So great So great What were you, did you have a drink? What did you have? They had fruit A couple of bourbon cocktails

A couple of bourbons They did They had fruity numbers And I think we got a couple of beers Right But honestly the gullies were living Like there was I've never seen such a sea of sea

queens and glitter and everything. I will say the vibes were on. Yeah. Was Ben worried about coming across a little pesty? Yeah, he saw himself out to the balcony, quicksmart. Yeah, yeah, I bet it. I've been it. I bet it. Quicksmart. Play Z-Ems, Fleshwon and Haley.

I want to hear from you, our listeners. What was your brutal nickname? Maybe growing up or maybe it was given to you by family. Just that nickname that sticks, right? That you cannot get rid of. And maybe it's just It's not so kind.

I'm talking about this because it has been revealed that Queen Elizabeth, R-I-P, nicknamed Sarah Ferguson, Fergie Ferguson, not Fergalicious. From the Black Hyde P's. No, no, no, no, who was married to... Yes, Andrew. Yep. The man who can't sweat. The man who does not sweat.

He does sweat or he doesn't sweat. Not on that day. Not sweat. Not on that day. Yeah. So his ex-wife, right? Were they still married? Who cares?

Basically. She's been stripped. Their lower-tier royals, Hayley. Lower tear, and now more than ever because they've both been stripped at their titles.

By their own making. Yeah, for sure. The Queen Elizabeth, Queen Elizabeth 2, reportedly nicknamed her The Duchess of Deceit. Oh, brutal. Yeah, said she was there, like,

just for money and da-da-da-da. Duchess of deceit. The queen. I love that. I bet the queen was a bit of a bitch. I reckon she was such a... Bit of a bitch. But you know when you're on the right side of those sorts of bitches,

you're just like, that's my bitch. Yeah. When you're against them, you're like, a rut row. Yeah. Anyway, that's a bit of a brutal one. I want to know what was your brutal nickname. It could be from, you know, it could be gaily smells from primary school.

Oh, some messages in already. My brother used to call me muttly, dog face, and thunder thighs. I love them. Oh, lay. My friend Clarissa, her nickname... Okay. Her nickname was Clit. And when she was in trouble, or it was a more formal situation,

we'd call her by her full name, Clitoris. Yeah, yeah. I used to work with a Claudia, we called her chlamydia. That was her... Oh, yeah. Well, Creaky Galee and Louise's message didn't. Oh, yes. You would think it would be Creaky Galee and Louise would be the nickname,

but she said she has red hair. So when she had long red hair, people called her the Dutch. of pork after Fergie, the Duchess of York. And when she had short read hair, people called Pauline Hanson.

So it was a little no win situation. Oh, I don't know which one I would rather be. She can't win. Yeah. My dad's friend was badly burnt in a house fire when he was a kid so his nickname was Toast.

Jeep! Oh my God! That is unreal. See, this is what I want. Not just like embarrassing, but like brutal. Funny. Okay. 0800 dials at Amazon number.

Give us a call. You can text here as well. 9-696. What was your brutal nickname. Some things on the show are a treat just for us that we can't say on ear. Far out. We want to know right now what was your brutal nickname. The Queen lovingly called Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of Deceit behind her back. It's been revealed. Mark, I tell you what, the nicknames we're getting in, not even close to that.

Oh, some of these are far more brutal. I would take Duchess of Deceit any day. Over a lot of these. We have tried to call a number of people and they don't want to own up to their nicknames. And we're fine with that. That's absolutely fine. Where do we start? Where do we start? Someone's nickname was just a vagina. A vagina. Because a lot of that, like you said,

Ava. Because her name's Ava. Oh, Ava Jina. That's actually quite funny. That's actually quite funny. Is it actually really funny? My name's Chloe and people call me Seahole. Didn't like that so much. Oh yeah, because that's how it's spelt. Seaholes.

Well, close, yeah. Um, Abby and people just said it was flabby or scabby. I was neither that hurt. Mm-hmm. My name is Dustin and my granddad only ever referred to me as dustbin. Granddad's, eh? But they were like, yeah, well, guess what? When I was your age, I had to go and shoot Nazis.

So, yeah. Take it. Take it, Dustin up, Dustin up, Dustin. Hardin up, dustin. You want PTSD, it's going to be more than a little nickname from granddad. Um, I called my sister Emeroid, like Amaroid. Oh, yeah. Emma, her name is Emma, emroyd.

And now she has a daughter called Remy, so I call her Remyroid. Remeroyd. Oh, my brother-in-law used to call me Chief Wiggum, Piggy, and my dad called me pork-chop pumba. Now, what is a brother-in-law dishing out a savage nickname for? He is a brother-in-law. Yeah, if you're family, you can, but you're not a, yeah. Also, are you pig-like?

Like, do you have a flipped-up nose or something? I'm a relatively okay-looking gal. Just used to be a hungry, chunky hippo But Chief Woodham, come on, man Sounds like a, what are you, a seven? Seven point two. I was called horse when I was 10 or 11. Now that nickname was given to me by a kid in my class's parent

Because I hadn't grown into my teeth yet They called me horse. Oh my God. And now everyone wants big teeth. I've got quite petite teeth and I'll be quite jealous of your teeth. Do they? People want big teeth? Yeah, like nice big, you know, like Hollywood veneers.

Oh, okay. It's bigger. Really? Yeah. Oh, I didn't know for me. I've got small teeth and I'd like big teeth. They take up, if they take up too much, you know. You replied a horse and say, I like your teeth.

You replied a horse and say, I like a teeth. I'll text horse. I'll personally text horse. My brother used to call me Cooney Cooney, because of the pig. My last name was Croton. But of course it got, Scroton was my nickname. Yeah, all the time. Before I got braces, I had prominent front teeth,

and the girls at high school called me Uma Rappati. Umarapiti. Rappity, Oma, Oma, Oma, but that's the run, eh, Oma is run. Rappite is rabbit. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah, so you're a Rappite. I got called the White Kenyan because I was fast and skinny, but also very white.

Okay, yeah. My friend Crystal, sometimes we chuck a little hyphen on the end of her name and it becomes Crystal Meph. Lovely girl, never touched the stuff. Yeah. Go on. My friend has cerebral palsy and so we called her Sniper's Nightmare for years. just sit with that one I'm not laughing at that

because that's bad but I mean was she cool with it because if she cried when you said that then that's really bad probably not wouldn't imagine

so at school my friends clopped that I have big hands for a girl so I got the nickname Shovels and it's stuck

yeah but having big hand is shovels now I've actually asked this person to elaborate further I don't know let's see if they've replied how did this happen

My dad named me pig tits. And I said, why did he do that? And they said, I don't know, maybe I looked like them, but I was only seven. Pig tits. Oh, my God. Come here, pig tits. Because, like, bull tits, you'd say as uses his tits on a bull. Yes, that's an old saying.

You'd never say uses his tits on a pig. No. This one literally says, I know you won't be able to read this out, but my sister called me three very offensive things. They say them. Yep. Beep, beep, beep, when we were kids. Turns out she was spot on on all three. Brilliant.

At college, I spilled chocolate milk down the front of my shirt. It was called milky tits for the rest of my time. Oh, no, milky tits. Mm. So good. My brother had a stroke when he was in his 30s and can only use one side of his body and his mates call him Wobbly Bob. Wobly Bob.

Is he robin? In his 30s. And people were like, oh, this is a great opportunity for a nickname. Oh, he comes out Wobly Bob. Yeah If we don't laugh, we cry You know what I mean? This person's name's

Chantelle, they got called Sean Telfent Sean Telfant So funny It is pretty good Like it's actually pretty funny Isn't it? But it's terrible

It's also terrible Yeah Are you filtering My nickname I'm just going to read this one It's longer And I was trying to get a quick take on it But I couldn't

So I'm just going to read it Why is it bad My nickname is Rubes Short for Ruby when I was a teen I misspelt it once when I was trying to spell rubbs was what came out of it and my best mate sort of would be funny to tell everybody

they called me that because I was a chronic masturbator To this day I still get called rubs This is really clever Worked with a guy that was born with half an ear So we called him 18 months One and a half years No Even if that's not true

It's very funny It's very funny. My brother's nickname was Durkan. Because he was the only brother that was circumcised in his family. Oh. Durkin. Durkin. Like Gurkin.

Durkin. Durkin. D-U-R-K-I-N. Dirkin. Is it a foreskin reference? Do you think we've got a typo? Do you think they meant Gurkin? No, it's an Irish.

He was circumcised and the rest of his brother's words. Yeah, like Gurkins. There's no foreskin on a Gurkin. It depends on the Gurkin. seen a girkin? I don't often peel back the skin on the girkin before I. Never really thought about it. Yeah.

Does a fork, does a gurkin have a full skin? No, it's got skin, but it's taught. It doesn't have an extra hood in a strain. There's no hood. Because it's the retractable nature of the... So that's why they would be called gert. Well, if we could get a follow-up on that dirken.

If we could get a dirken follow-up, please. Might have to pop back and visit that. In the out of break. 3-2-0. If we could get a follow-up. Oh, I had short curly hair, so they called me pubs. Oh, why was he called Dirkin?

Just in case, just in case they've set the text and then, you know, for some reason, they were away from the radio, maybe they arrived at their destination or... Oh, we've got a sausage fingers. We've got a boner. Oh, because somebody got a... Yeah, that's a classic. I used to get called Nancy, because you take the wire and it becomes an anagram. It becomes anagram for no chin.

Oh. Oh, it becomes anagram for no ankles, no chin. A girl I went to school with us called Chloe And she had a big nose and called her Clinocchio I think we're going to be that Leave it up to the kids Play ZM's Flashawn and Haley You guys done any Christmas shopping

None Are we not doing anything this year We're doing a donation To Variety NZ, my family That's nice That's a good idea Oh lots of people going hungry this Christmas That's a good idea

And you're all going to chip into a kitter and do one. One big donation on behalf of the Sprouse, yeah. That's really cool. We want for nothing, you know? Yeah, I like that. Yeah, we buy ourselves our own thing. And it's just going to be like junk.

Yeah. And that's the last thing I need in my life is more junk. Yeah. But Fletch, what are you probably just buying yourself business class tickets to wherever you go in this island? Four, yes. Well, that's a bit much. Alongside his donation to his charity.

No, he won't even do that thing where he offsets his carbon. Oh, that's a lot of shit. I want to see them, Trees. That's like donations at the supermarket. They're just tax rider. They're writing off tax to that. Yeah, they're the only ones winning out of that. And the charities, obviously.

The charity gets it, but they get to dodge a little bit of tax. They get to look like the good guys and dodgy bit of tax. Now, just remember that this festive season. Just remember the tax department this festive season. Yes. Went for a shot. Because I didn't, Black Friday's not till this Friday. Why is everybody saying it's already started?

No, because everybody started. They do it for like the month now. It's blown out. Okay. I'm not complaining about it. I like it. There's some deals out there. Yeah, there are deals, wheels and deals.

I took, my 13 year old did a new pair of togs, so we went shopping. Good God. Also, taking a teenager shopping for togs, that's a journey in itself. If she'd been like a kid, it would have been sweet or if she was like an old lady who wanted floral togs. Not a problem.

Farmers had that covered. Every floral design you can imagine on a pair of togs. Yeah. But she said there's in this middle zone of the, where do we get? We found some in the end. That would, you know, how much? $79. Yeah.

Down from $99. Yeah, my one pair of dogs. My one piece was like $150. I actually saw a sign at the weekend in a changing room and it was like, you must leave on your undies. Yes. And I took a photo of it. And I was like, I wonder if we could just sit a little pole on that.

Because I don't think, if you're trying on undies, or swimwear, you want to know it fits. You've got different genitals to us. You want to know it fits. You just don't think, regardless of what my genitals are. You don't know my genitals.

Walking around, we're going to have sweaty jenny's. Yeah, but we have been known to leave a trace. Yeah, I know. I know. And so that's why. I know. It's mangy.

I don't think any genitals should be touching. No. Oh, neither. But, you know, if you're going to try something on, you want to know that it fits. I always pull my undies, like, proper, like, so it's just the little bit covered. Right.

I try to pull it. it down to see what they actually look like on. But is it insane taking teenagers' shopping? Oh, I bet. Yuck. Oh, no. I need to go to the mall today. They're not hard to buy for and they're not like, you know, we want this, we want this,

we want this. It was just, I've got great ones, thanks to noticing. Teenagers. They were great. It was just like, it was just in the house. Well, you hate shopping, don't you? Famously hate it. 13 is a weird age.

Yeah. You're not in the woman, woman, woman areas yet. But you're definitely not. a kid. And also, she was like, I want these things from glassons and I was like, okay. You really hit the ons of glassons. Yeah, say that again. Glassons. Glassons. No, it's the Helen Stein brothers. Glassons. Glassons. But I bought her these things and I was like, oh, you're those are for Christmas? And then went home and she was wearing them. And I was like, are those not for

Christmas? And she's like, can I just have them now? And I was just like, yeah. But then Christmas is going to suck. I suppose so. But then you're going to have nothing open on Christmas. And she's like, well, can I just get more stuff for Christmas? She played you, man. Yeah, you got played. I think I got played then. But then also, I was like, I was like, you can't buy a kid clothes and be like, put them away for Christmas. Yes, she can.

She needs clothes, you need clothes, clothes. Yeah. Dilemma. Anyway, man. Well, I guess you're buying more things for Christmas. Yeah, I think I'll buy more things for Christmas. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flash forun and Haley.

I want to know where you were taken on a date that was maybe a little out of the ordinary. Shocked you, surprised you. Yeah. Because a woman has shared, she lives in East London and was chatting online with a guy, having a great bloody time getting on. She said she reckon it was a perfect guy. Yeah.

Right, he listens, he's kind, he's attractive, he's lovely. This accent's taking us on a trip all around London. Oh no, mate. And now I am. Oh, no, mate. So absolutely going well. She's excited. We're going on a date and he's like,

okay, I'll organise this a little date. I'll come and pick you up. Doodoo-da-d-da-loo. He picks her up, takes her to like a car park, and it's like, we're just going to go for a little walk. And she's like, oh, my God, this is so cute, little walk and talk. And instead of it being like a local park or anything,

it's a graveyard. Oh, fascinating, though, in London. I know. It could be a really old graveyard with some historic graves and stuff, and you get to read what people died off. Yeah. So turns out the band t-shirts he was wearing weren't just sort of a fashion thing.

This is a, he ends up being like a kind of gothic kind of like full metal. guy and he thought this was a great date idea and kind of became like quite obsessed of the graves and the lives of the dead and I think she was just like that's not kind of what I thought we was. You know I thought you're going to

be like a fun guy yeah that's weird that's weird she went around she said she did her best to absolutely like try to get her head into it and like try to see what he got you know the joy out of it but it was actually just really quite dark as it revealed to her that perhaps they weren't as compatible as she originally

fought. I love this. Okay, well, 0,800 dials at Emerson number. You can text through 9-696. Where did they take you on a date that was weird, odd, bad, hilarious? We asked this on Instagram and here are some of the responses. To get the ball rolling. Roll that ball, baby. Jim said, I got taken on a date to pick a part in Christchurch to get a new wingner.

I do love a pick apart, though. Do they let you pick the part though? Or do they go pick it for you? You just say. because it would be more fun if you could rip the mirror off. Now, if you'd let the professionals do that. Give me a go.

Give you a go. I'm picking a part. The first date with my now husband, he took me to an adrenaline forest in a 20 metre high-rocks course. It's a bit much for date one. Yeah. She said they're married now,

so it must have worked. But see, what is it? We talked about a while ago. If you do something with someone on a date that makes a memory aren't you more likely to be into them if you go on a crazy series? You go on like maybe something adrenaline

like you bungee jump with someone you're going to remember that. It's a bit of, because you're trauma bonded. You know what I mean? Like you sort of immediately. Trauma bond. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is an interesting one.

He took me to a Victoria's Secret. What? On the first date, a bold move. And he's like, pick whatever you want. How would you feel if somebody on the, you're on the apps this time for the first. time in ages, Haley. It feels presumptuous.

But it's free undies. Yeah, inexpensive. Maybe you implied that you only had some raggedy old undies. Which I often do. And you grew up and I could like a nice beer of undies. He saw your old bonds sticking out of the top there. Yeah, but torn jockeys. He took me to the river.

Not on a spot where everyone goes. A random secluded hole where I felt sure I would spend the rest of eternity. Oh, God. Oh, God. That's so terrifying. In the bottom of the river. Probably just wanted to look at the eels. Yeah, probably.

But you're like... Please don't murder me. With the eels. Okay, well, 0,800-10 at em is the number. Your text is coming in as well. 9-6-96. Where is the weird person, someone took you on a date? The weird place.

Yeah, sorry, the weird place someone took you on a date. The weird place was that someone took you on a date. There was a girl online, everything's going well. Take you for a walk. It's a graveyard. He's a bit dark and gothy. Didn't work out. No, thanks.

It's a no from me. Zen. Good morning, Zen. Good morning. How are we today? Really good, thanks. Now, where did you end up on a date? So, me and my now husband actually went to the Fair Factory in Queenstown. I love that place. Well, I've never been in. I've walked past every time we're in Queenstown. I'm like, one day.

I did a whole Queenstown holiday. You know, the sights, the sound, the fields, and then Fair Factory was a highlight. I loved it. What happens in there? Is it like, do people try to scare you or something? Yeah, it's all dark, eh? Yeah, it's terrifying So I said to him I was like, we'll go Minikov, we'll do Fair Factory

It'll be great He was like, yeah, yeah, okay Not realizing it's actually terrifying And he refuses to go back now But it was fun on the day Yeah, yeah And you know what, you get to cling to the person as well, don't you? Oh, I'm scared, I'm scared

Hold me Hold me Zinn, thank you Fran, where did you end up on a date? Hi, I ended up on a day at a dry ass, crusty, dusty, paddock in the middle of his parents' farm just to watch him ride his goddamn motorbike. Oh, God, that's not my show.

Now, by the sound of your voice, there wasn't a second date or you're married to him now and he still does it? Yeah, 12 years later, he still does it, and I have to watch all three of my children do the same shit. Oh, great. Fantastic. How many times have you been to A&E, Fran? He's had three split livers, so we've been there quite a bit.

I've only got one liver I don't think you should split it more than once No Is it from motorcrot? Is it from motorbike accidents? Yes Yeah Split your liver

Oh no Jeez Yeah Also there's no winning Because in winter when they do a motocross It's just muddy And everything's wet and muddy and cold And then in summer it's dusty dusty

Dry dusty I know So it's just not good at all And it's all the same shit Well you You sound like you had a guts You're right But we'll love it, I promise.

Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's great. Fran, thank you. Some messages. And where did you end up on the date? I was taken to a drug deal, which happened to be in my work car park. We went via his ex-girlfriend's house to check out her car. We never made it to a second date as he ended up in jail for theft of a vehicle.

The girlfriend's ex-girlfriend's one. What? Cheapest. Okay, wild. I was taken to a pet store. It was actually one of the funest dates I've ever been on. Oh, yeah, okay. A guy took me to mass for our first.

day. He was right into it. Told me it was a surprise and everything. Yeah, Catholic Mass. I guess you've got to find out if they're into what you're into. I mean, I just sort of, I reckon he's have a little chat about her. Oh, I know, but it would stink because if she's not like part of the Catholic Church, when they do the part, they go up to get the bread and the wine, he'll be like, I'll be back. And he leaves her.

Yeah. I mean, she could lie and stand behind him, but God knows. What if someone did this to Fletch and didn't tell him he'd burst into flames? I know, I walked past the church just the other day, and I felt a bit warm. Yeah, yeah, that's the devil. Yeah, I was about to combustible. Yeah. Oh, okay, combustible. I got taken on a date to a kindergarten,

whereas pet pig had been rehomed in their farm yard animal area. He's like, I just want to see how my pig's doing. We took apples to feed it. It bit me, and I needed medical attention. Pigs bite really, really hard. They do, famously. That's why they're great at disposing human bodies. They can digest everything except the hair and the teeth.

How does he know that? Stop asking so many questions. And what of my flesh more than I wanted animals? Did not seek further date. Yeah, fair, fair enough. My sick... The brothel? I haven't seen the brothel.

I haven't seen the brothel. I got taken to a brothel on my first date. We were talking about how much we both enjoyed a game of pool, but there was nowhere open late on Tuesday. He told me he knew a place. We walked down, I realized it was the only... It was a brothel, but he knew all the girls by name as well. Oh, good. Oh, wow.

Sarah. Katie! Katie. Crystal. Pool table, crystal. Yeah, you got the pool table out. All sack, I am. My feeling.

He's a pilot in our first date. He took me up in a cister and we flew around Port Chalmers in Dunedin. It was amazing. I mean, that's awesome. But if you're scared of flying, that would be able to achieve that. Well, on a second date,

he blindfolded me and when he took it off, we were at a skydiving place. So now that's going in a plane and jumping out of it. Oh, wow. Okay. You'd have to know. Date with my now husband was downhill

mountain biking in France. I came off and broke three ribs. That's a great first date. Wow. My ex took me to his ex-in-laws, baby mum is home for noodles. they were out of town. Should have been a red flag.

However, I went on to become baby mama number two. For noodles. So he took them to his ex's house. Well, they weren't home. Did they know? But did they have a lot of noodles or something? Did they have like a pantry of noodles? And he's like, well,

my first date was in hospital. We matched on Tinder scheduled a weekend brunch date. Then I broke my leg, so we just came to the hospital room instead. That's so cute. That's a little bit cute. We're going to need to follow up on that one. They're still together, right? That's love.

They're married. They're married. Follow up, please. Oh my God, that's so cute. Oh, I can see what this person previously messaged in about. Their husband was the one that got charged with assault with a firearm at age 16 for shooting some trick-or-treaters of the paintball gun during Halloween mischief. Now, I remember that.

Is that the same guy that came to the hospital room, do you think? Or this was a date? No, it doesn't give the same energy. Well, we'll need a full. follow-up there from that text. Come on 6-16, I need to know. Some more messages in. I know someone who went on a date with a guy who showed out with his music absolutely blaring.

She went to get into the car and had to put rubbish off the front seat to sit on it. Oh, dudes, do a quick claim. I mean, Rich coming from you, but yeah, sure. I'd do a quick clean. You would. Then he drove her all the way to Raglan for a picnic, handed her a container of noodles in a thermos of hot water so she could make them herself. Wait, did she get the noodles from...

He got the noodles from his ex-baby mummer number one. Noodles theme. I'd be careful, Rachel. Your friend might be baby number, mama, number three. Yeah. One, two, three, four, five, everybody in the clubs. Oh, come on. We need an update from 616.

I need to know if hospital date became a bigger thing. Yeah. Refreshing messages. Refreshing messages. Just had a flashback remember of lots of noodles, but what's it called? I think that text needed a bit of an edit. Still waiting on that. That's a follow-up.

Okay. What do you guys What do you guys do at the weekend? I reckon not together The only thing as well is when you're in those hospital gowns You're not allowed to wear a bra And my boobs sort of splay I'd feel a bit embarrassed

You know what that sort of flop to the sign A bit sago Yeah Well no one looks great in a hospital gown And I haven't got any makeup on My ex took me to the barracks In the army camp for him to do his washing While I sat on the bed

Well it obviously did something Because now he's baby daddy Oh baby daddy Okay. Yeah. Is he currently partnered baby daddy or is he? Baby daddy, baby daddy. Anyway, we haven't heard from 616.

Well, dead to us, I guess. The ZM Podcast Network play ZM's Fleshhorn and Haley. Okay, we've heard from 616. Follow up. This was the date that was in the hospital room. Yep. We had a bedside smooch, but it turned out after a year of dating, he had another girlfriend all along.

Oh! It was actually a proper MFFer. Oh, no. We had links to go to for a sidepiece when he would come and sit. So he had the girlfriend when he came and saw her in the hospital. That is not the result we wanted. That's not where I thought that story was going. Well, right now it's time for...

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day. Ah, do-da-da-do-do-da-da-da-do-da-do. Well, if you loved Calendar Week... Oh, God. If you want a coffee, Fletch, I'm going to pop off. You are going to love Temperature Week. Because it's Temperature Week here at Fact of the Day. Bear in mind when Vaughna and I are away on our business trip in Sydney tomorrow, Haley,

you will have to carry on temperature week. I got you a really good one for tomorrow. So I'm doing, okay, I'm doing the top six and I'm doing Fact of the Day next week. Tomorrow. And I've got to intro. I'm feeling a little bit of resentment that you're not on the work trip to Sydney. I would have loved a trip to Sydney I would have loved a little

sojourn to Sydney with my friends You've never watched Fallout Fallout is one of the best top things I have observed And it would be a privilege to I don't know a single thing about it All right well it's temperature week

We're going to be delving into different facts About temperature and today Thermometers You know mercury inside thermometers Yes The little silver things And when you'd break a thermometer or when you were a kid and you didn't know, you'd touch it.

And then you find out it's really bad for it. I just remember being yelled at by mum about never breaking it. Yeah. Or in the science teacher as well, being quite serious about that. Mercury. Yeah. Well, have you ever taken your cat or dog to the vet and they stick at the little thing in their bot bots?

Yes. They're little, it's such a thin little stick. Okay. It's just, I'm always just like, oh. Oh, that sucks. And it always makes me feel there must be a better way to do it in 2012 and five. We've got the guns now. We've got the temperature.

of guns. Yeah, we had those in COVID. COVID, they were awesome. They just had lasered your forehead. You couldn't get into Mecca if you were two degrees over. Oh my God, that's right. I'm just here for a bloody mimosa. Yeah. They So they would shoot the cat

and the anus with the temperature laser? Is it an anus specific part or it's just easier than putting it in their mouth? I don't know. If you've just joined us, we're talking about thermometers. Well, Mercury isn't, did you know because Mercury cannot measure below negative 39

degrees Celsius because it freezes. That's Mercury's freezing point. Oh, okay. Well, where's negative below 39? What? Use your words on. Okay, where's a negative? Okay, so in a natural situation, it would be

the likes of Antarctica or the Arctic can get below. I've heard that that's balmy these days and we should consider a visit. Well, join us later in the week for a fact of the day. Temperature week where we will be touching on Antarctica and the Arctic. Okay, good. It's depressing.

But mercury freezes at negative 39, meaning if you just had an outside thermometer, it wouldn't be able to go down any further. Right. It would go hard. Galiston was another one that they used to use, and it's worse than mercury because it freezes earlier. It freezes solid at negative 19 degrees. But it wasn't toxic, so it was easier to work with. However, guys, oh no. It sticks to glass as well.

So when the temperature would go down, the gallastin would just kind of like, kind of stick to the glass and slowly fall down of gravity. So it was a smeary, whereas mercury, as we know, if you've ever flipped it across the day, well, don't. Yeah, don't do that. But if you did. It's a fast mover.

Yeah. Yeah. There are a whole lot of other ones that are really good for it. The one that they said would be best for it is a mercury thallium alloy, a mixture of the two. And it could measure colder. It can measure down to negative 80 degrees Celsius. I don't want to be anywhere that's that cold.

However, neither. Horrendously toxic. And we'll melt the glass over time. Okay. Okay, so that's why we use mercury. That's why we use mercury. Because if the mercury freezes, you know it's below negative 39.

And I don't think you'd be able to tell the difference between negative 39 and negative 49. At that point, you don't get to know anymore. You're slowly turning into it an ice block. Yeah. Yeah. So today's fact of the day is if you have a mercury thermometer, you can't measure below negative 39 degrees Celsius.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day, day. I do-d-do-do-do-do-do-d-do-d-d-do-d-d-do-d-do-d-do-do-do-do-do do-do do-do do-do do-do do-do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. The Z-M's podcast network. Play Z-M's Fletch Forne and Haley. Christmas is imminent team, and that is time to celebrate with some laughter and some cheer and some joy. Joy to the world Chris Park is here He's hosting a show

Oh god Get along everyone Sing us one's enough Drama kids get together Drama kids One's more than enough I didn't realize we were here With a couple of scrooges

Hayley I know There's such a nays A couple of naughty boys need to be visited by the ghosts of their Christmas past I know And find that Yule Tide spirit

Which I think you'll find is pretty gay It's pretty gay Now you're hosting Best Christmas Comedy Show on Earth, 28th of November at Sky City Theatre. Yeah. Home of comedy and casinos. You can have it all really. You can have it all.

And a buffet. Place your bets on who will make you laugh the most. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So who's in that? Who's in the... Fantastic line up. I'm in it. I'm hosting it. And then, you know, just your classics. Just your absolute five-star comedy gold royalty. No, don't you dare even prompt me. Do you let us to Google? No, Ray O'Leary. We're talking.

in Henry Yan, we're talking Courtney Dawson, Janae Henry, Brinley Stent. The list goes on, and by that I mean I don't know the rest of the list. He's got out. Ghost of Billy T. James. James Masterpicks in there as well. Fantastic. I mean, you did well.

That's two Celebrity Treasure Island winners for the price of one Comedy Gala. I mean, it doesn't get better than that. I've done the best comedy show on Earth, and it's so great. It's like the big comedy gala they do every year, but way looser, I reckon. Yeah. Yeah, and it's the the end of the year so everyone's just sort of like

let's just go for it let's take some wrist let's throw some punches let's throw some Christmas punches are you going to do some Christmas base comedy well you know me I have a couple of Christmas tales yes namely I um worked as a mall Santa for a couple of years

I've shown you guys a photo of me that Hayley sat on my lane yeah we've got were you too young to be a mall Santa yes and far too thin yeah he was thin and 22 you know I um Lawrence to alleviate it, you know? There was a lot of prosthetics going on. There was padding and there

was a, you know, a spirit that kind of, you saw through. You know, you thought, this isn't a 22 year old twink. This is a jolly old man. Yeah. My favourite was that you had to get ready, you were to go to Harvey Ormond. In the Westwood toilets.

Yeah, and I also did the Harvey Norman Christmas as well. That's where I saw Santa. And yeah, there was a, there was a misfortune a moment where my Santa outfit was in the toilets. I got changed in there and then I sort of left my clothes in there and then someone thought

whose clothes are these? I'm doing the three-hour shift on the seat and then so someone comes in takes my clothes away so I go back to get changed. I take all my like get this Santa suit off me. I'm sort of half-scented, half Chris Parker realized my clothes aren't there. So then I find myself sort of running through Harvey Norman. Half-sand-

beard and tiny little legs being like, has anyone seen my clothes? Yeah, yeah. And then Oh, that's a nice price on the year we boom. I will just interject. If kids are listening, sometimes Santa sends helpers to represent him at the malls. If I help us, we mean drama school graduates. Graduates looking for a dime.

They need money. Were you ever called out when there was a kid there? No, by the parents. Really? Yeah. He's so skinny. The kids are like, Santa looks snatched. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

And Santa looks like he could be cast in something. I'm a child casting agent. I want to put Santa in a cutting edge drama or short on the street That was sort of how played up What are you doing for Christmas this year? Big family Well yeah I mean Christmas is a crazy time Because like in the lead up it's like you know

I'm gigging You know and I don't want to be But I'm out there spreading some joy So I'm also doing a comedy dance show with Dynamotion And that's right up into the lead up to Christmas And then that finishes And then I'm just going to you know unwind Are you and husband Michael Michael hosting?

Have you ever hosted Christmas yet? I'm so ready to do that. However, we live in a sort of like child unfriendly apartment. You know, we've created the perfect ecosystem for two gay men to thrive in. But it is not a great space for children. They bonk their head. And we have to take all our art down because it is sexually explicit. And so, you know, it's terrible.

So, no, we travel. We're going, you know, it's either up north or down in Christchew. So we're going up north this Christmas, which is good nice. Lovely. Oh, yeah. Do you do gifts? Because the sprows, we've stopped. Oh, that's sad, isn't it?

No, it's not. It's perfect because we're child-free family. Yeah. Grandchildren free, me and my brother. So we're just getting absolutely pissed instead. Slaught it. Just absolutely sloppy face. Oh, you didn't have to. A whole bottle of gin.

Oh, my God, I gluck, like, glug. But do you do gifts as a family? Or do you secret Santa? Because your family, your side of the family is big. My side of the thing, we've actually gone so, like, Swiss family Robinson styles on it and it's so feel good so we do a Christmas

oh sorry everyone's going to be like I hate this family but we do a Christmas decoration creation sort of competition Fletch you'd love that that sounds like a bit of you yeah exactly does this happen on Christmas day yeah I know so you're

on Christmas day so you spend the lead up to Christmas making your decoration and then on Christmas and then it's sort of like a snatchy Santa situation where you open a thing and you pull a that like a horrific decoration and then this person who sort of made it you sort of watch them as they

sort of smile but as everyone kind of goes what is that? The tears sort of brim in their eyes and then you can steal each other's decorations and it's a lot of fun and there's a lot of creativity and I like celebrating creativity at Christmas you know it's not just about

horrible toys I just feel like you'd end up going home with a suitcase full of junk but the thing is Michael and I's Christmas tree like I want our Christmas tree to be filled with horrific decorations. We don't have kids, so we'd have to be creating the bad decorations. And this... Macaroni and sort of like paper chains.

But now I'm getting decorations from my darling 29-year-old sister who can't do crafts. And they're on my Christmas tree now. And my mum is horrific at making decorations. So someone's like this horrible little Santa's on my tree now. And they're like, who made that? And I'm like, my mum. My mom. And recently.

How many members of your family are medicated in some way or another? Do you know, it's... On record, uh, four. Off record, it's unknown. I always say, like, Chris has... Chris is one of four, and there's two of each kind. Yeah, truly. Like, Chris has a sister who's a Chris 2.0.

Yeah, yeah. It's an absolute blast. Well, best, best Christmas comedy, best Christmas comedy show on Earth. Best Christmas Comedy Cracker Comedy Club. Whichies and love. Comedy Festival.com.NZ. Yeah, that's Sky City Theatre on the 28th of November

and a Christmas crisis is from the 10th to the 20th of December. That's sort of dying of motion. Where's that happening? A queue theatre. At queue. Right in the heart of the city. Wow. Have a stroll down Queen Street and come to the theatre.

Wow. Avoid the homeless people and all the people urinating and have a Christmas chair. I think they're trying to get rid of them, aren't they? Well, good luck and love to... They'll end up wrapped up in your secret. We'll bring them into our show. You'll open your Christmas... You're like, well, this isn't a decoration.

This is a person. Yeah. The government wanted rid of them. Well, my love to the family for Christmas. And to yours as well. And I hope you boys find some sense of Christmas joy in your hearts. The ZD.M Podcast Network. What's going on?

ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Fletch Fawn and Haley. Silly little poe. It is so silly, silly, silly, silly. That a silly little poe, silly little poe, silly little poe, silly little poe, silly little poe. Today's silly little poll, it's all thanks to Mick Cafe, start your day rolling with delicious coffee. And the silly little poll is, have you decided on a New Year's resolution yet? Now, this may come as somewhat of a shock to you, but a recent study has found that as few as 8% of people achieve their goals by the end of the year, their resolutions.

Oh, no. I knew. My New Year's resolution is going to be just going to get to Christmas. that next year as well 2026 Right so every year all we're doing is treading water till Christmas Yeah you just get through to Easter

And then you just get through to Queen's King's Mid-year break Yeah and then My birthday is for Christmas And then just So apparently the most common reasons for failure Include too many news resolutions I also think like too vague

Yeah Like get fit What does that look like for you? Yeah I do know I think I've decided this year because I always make resolution. Never work. Yeah.

2025 was supposed to be my year. Hey, the highs have been high and the lows have been low. The highs have actually been super high. You're right. Thank you for some reflective perspective. Reflective perspective. I call it reflexion. I decided this year I'm going to make a little list.

I'll be working on it gently of more of less of. So next year I want more of this and I want less of that. It's a nice take on the resolution. More weekends at home. Right. less of drinking every day. Right, but you're going to be home, you know, it'd be wrong, not too. On the deck, on the deck.

Yeah, crack one. But just, it's more, it's a bit more like painting a picture as opposed to, I'm going to do a marathon, because no. 7% of people have decided on New Year's resolutions. 30% said not yet, and 63% said, I don't plan on making any. Fair enough. We're all just trying to survive. We're all just trying to survive.

crazy that you talk about New Year's resolution when January was somehow two months and also two years ago, says Briar. I know, this year has flown. That sort of perspective, rectispective, perspective, reflective perspective. I think we'll win her

the coffee vouchers today for a Maccafe. Straight out of the gay. I was like, man, got a $50 Maccafe voucher for you. Yeah, some other feedback. Jaden said, I just set much small or more achievable goals throughout the year rather than setting a resolution that'll definitely be given up on by January 4th.

Yeah, that's nice. It's a nice way of doing it. And may January the 4th be with you. I'm looking forward to that. I always celebrate. I actually don't mind when people fall off their resolutions because it makes a gym a bit quieter. Yeah, man, it's cranking at the moment.

There's only two stair machines, the freeze on of them are. Everybody is at the gym at the moment because they're realizing that summer is like imminent. Too late. It's here. It's here, man. It's here. Jrame says,

I don't, also, this person replies to the silly little poll all the time. I've never had a definitive on how to pronounce the name. It's Jeremy, but it's going to A on the end instead of a Y. Jareem. Jareem. Jareem. I think we say Jureem. It's still with Jureem. I can't even commit to a week of no takeout.

I ain't resolving shit come January. Violet says having all birthday and Christmas shopping done before October. Oh, yeah. That's the New Year's resolution. Matt says it's the same every other year and I fail two weeks into it every other year. Yeah. I put myself first. Enough of everybody else is bullshit.

That's their resolution for 2020. 26. Preeti says Mama's already perfect. No resolutions needed. Fair enough. Can't argue with that. I love that. I'm happy with it. Crazy that people will wait until New Year's to make a change. Says come.

High and mighty. That came across a bit higher mighty come. I don't know if you're kind of... That comes across a little higher money. You meaning that we could just like improve ourselves at any moment during the year? I'm going to wait for January 1st and if I miss it, then I miss it. Are you kidding me? Mason said I don't plan. I'm making one. my current plan is just to survive.

Yep. I just have to make it to Christmas 2035. Yeah. Just make it through to Christmas. Christmas in 10 years. 33 weeks pregnant. My year will be surviving a toddler and a baby. That's all I can resolve to come to terms with.

Yeah, fair enough. Danielle said, honestly, you can't make the shit up that my life throws at me. So who am I to plan for it? Jeep. Well, that sounds like someone that's had a great year like you guys. Yeah, yeah, thriving. One to remember. Someone's rolling in the thriving.

Well, we asked if you've made your New Year's resolution. yet and 63% of you don't plan on even making one. Well, congratulations to you, podcast listening. You've reached the end. So I would assume if you've listened all this way through, you're either asleep, in which case, wake up! Or you enjoyed it.

So drop us a review and tell your friends. That's how podcasts work. Play ZM's Fletchhorn and Haley.