ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - November 25th 2025

Episode Date: November 24, 2025

On today's episode of the Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley Big Pod, its a girls takeover, Hayley & the producer girlies fill in while the boys are away Justice for Shannon Loneliness over Christmas Salvia pregnancy test Top 6 - Benefits of sleeping at a boys house Toe Tights?!? SLP - Are you hosting or attending Christmas?  Handwriting ick Bet I Can Guess When Your Period's Due Where did you have to pee in public? Girl Math Hayley's dating wrapped Fact of the day What went wrong in  the bridal party? See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM podcast network. This is Fleshwin and Haley's Big Pod. Brought to you by Chemist Warehouse. The biggest brands at the lowest prices. Fledge Ford and Haley on ZM this morning, boys away. Girl Show! Let's go, girls. We've got producer Carmen and producer Shannon on the mics today

because the boys are in Sydney at the Fallout premiere. Yes. Did you see Vaugh on socials? Okay, let's address this. You, why did you give him the social log in? Because I didn't want to have to do. stay up and wait for him to send me stuff. Right. So I sent him

the log in and I have regretted it deeply. And I will be making sure he logs out as soon as he is back. The aesthetic is not great. He posted a plate of food that he'd eaten. Who cares? Yeah, look. Well, yeah,

we'll get him signed out of there pretty soon. But yeah, it's just the girly show today. I wore pink shoes in a pink shirt and I was like is this anti-feminist? Am I giving myself my own pink tax? You know what I mean? I think we're doing it on our own accord. It's a reclamation.

I think Barbie taught us to reclaim pink. Yes. Yes, she did. And also, I'll be trying to say some of the songs. But Shannon, I think you need to go into the songs and I'll come out of them. Okay. Well, you know that challenge where you put your arms behind your back

and you pretend to be someone else? That would be a dream. I think we just kind of play that this morning. Okay, I love this. I'm going to start off with Ray. Well, hang on, hang on, hang on. Oh, I'll do some teasey whizags. Okay, teasing wheezy.

Because top six has to be me. Fact of the day has to be me. It does. I've got to do all the promo. Your shoulders are going to be sore. Well, top six today, we're addressing the fact that I stayed at a boy's house last night. And I have noticed a benefit that maybe I will make part of my daily life.

So I've got the tops. I'll tell you what that is and I'll give the top six. other reason, or the top six other benefits of sleeping overnight at a boy's house. Love that. But next on the show, Justice for Shannon is the break. You wanted to talk about something yesterday and Fletch pooed it because he said it was far too silly. Yeah, and here I am pressing the button, so we're going to talk about it next.

Play ZDM's Flesh, Fawnan, and Haley. Girls only show today, because the boys are in Sydney doing a business thing, apparently. Eating, hanging out, doing nothing. But yesterday, Shannon, you pitched a break that you wanted to talk about. about on ear, and Fletch said it was far too silly. Yeah, he just doesn't get it. I'm really big into big animal news. You are, we've got the gay sheep.

Gay sheep, cute raccoons now because of evolution. Yesterday I saw that lions have been proven to have accents. Now we're talking. So across Africa, they've found that based on the areas they are, the lions roar differently, and they have fully different dialects. And I just think this is so cute. This is a show for supporting women, women supporting women. Yeah.

But this is silly. I just like to think about why they have different accents. And you love South Africa. And you love the South African accent. Well, I know. And as someone who was local and grew up around the lines, I would have been able to tell which region these. It's getting worse.

Yeah, it is. Can you give us some examples of accents? Only the white ones. I don't want to get cancelled on my first show. No, you know, you. done. You just want me to vocalise it as if I was the line. Well how do they tell the difference? Do you know

how they can differentiate from one accent to another? I think it's like the twang of it. The twang? Some of them have like a southern draw. Okay. That's just like a you know. Why did they do they record these and sort of have a little listen and go okay that means they're from this region? I mean it makes sense doesn't it? Yeah and they said that when other

lions when they put them together they get a bit confused from each other. They have to learn each other's accent. Oh, like, so I'm so sorry, can you slow down a little bit. I can't quite understand what you're saying. Yeah, like when you go to a different country and you have to pull up Google Translate, the lions have to do that too. Do you know what these lions need is

the new Apple Earpods? Oh, now you're talking now. Because they translate, don't they? Yeah, they do. And when you watch a court and like, oh, the UN, not the court. When you watch a court? When you watch the UN and they all have headphones in. They've all got their headphones on. This is what we need

for the lions. With live translations. I mean, surely this is actually because it helps the lions tell who's from their pact and who isn't, right? Yeah, definitely. I mean, I feel what? Didn't think about that once. I was like, how cute?

No, no, no, definitely. I mean, like, don't dolphins already do this? Yeah, probably. They all have their own songs or something that say that I'm from this community and you're also part of this community. You're not a threat to me. You are my family. Yeah, or like, don't shag me.

I'm your sister. Do you know what I mean? because then we're going to have weird and bread-looking dolphins. I feel like maybe like, hang on, I'm going to have a look. Do all animals have accents? Because like we're imagining it like, hello, I'm a lion from the left.

Like, hi there, I'm a lion from over here. No, not all animals have accents because most species rely on genetically imprinted vocalisations. But many that exhibit vocal learning do show regional variations in their sounds where it can be considered accents, including sperm whales, dolphins, songbirds,

which can develop unique vocal dialects based on their social groups in geographic locations. Wow. So it is regional. They're like the Invercargo, New Zealanders. Who are the only people in our country that have an accent?

Yeah, and it's intense as well. Why wouldn't someone in the north have an accent? I don't understand the Invercago thing. How did the Invercago accent happen? I'm there this weekend, so I'll hear lots of arras. Why are you going down to Invercago? just there. Well, we're talking about it later on the show I'm a bridesmaid this weekend. Oh my god,

yes. The Z&P Podcast Network. Play, ZN's Flesh, Fawn and Haley. Boys away today, so it's a girl's only show. Producer Girlie's in the, uh, in the studio with me. Smells nicer. It does. It does. And we haven't even had to light a candle. We haven't had to light a candle. Because sometimes when you come in here, it's a bit like, wafty. Yeah, there's definitely a linger. And we light a candle. How many days away from Christmas are? Well, we are, I've got this on my phone because

I've got to to count it, 23 days, or 24 days away from our break. Yeah, well, it's a month till Christmas. Today's the 25th. Is it? A month till Christmas. Well, I mean, I feel like Christmas isn't always a happy time for people because it kind of marks the end of another year.

And for some people, you know? That's crazy, man. That's so crazy, man. But reading a great article, some relationship therapists. And we didn't want to get Morgan on the show, but she didn't, she kind of like left us on read. Yeah, she's like busy doing a photo shoot or something, just being like an amazing sexologist or something. Like changing the world and helping women around whatever. But relationship therapists about how to navigate love and loneliness this holiday season

because a lot of people may be like me, single for the first time, time to reflect on the end of the year that was. Maybe some people, you know, you're all surrounded by your best friend and her husband and your sister and her boyfriend and you're just sitting there thinking, why no one love me. Why am I such a dog? So some questions that people have been asking over the holiday season. Should you date just to avoid feeling lonely? Or just to get some extra giftinges. Ah, well it is cuffing season. That's what they say. Remind me cuffing season because it feels horny. It is. Just locking someone down ahead of the season, just so you've got someone to take to all these events. You're getting the presents. You've got someone and then see you

right after. Undoing the cuffs and letting them free into the world. That's not a bad idea. So say that Holineers highlighting togetherness obviously heightens loneliness for those people that are alone. So some people solely date to escape this loneliness or they cuff them as I'm learning from our Gen Z producers here. They say that this is not a solid foundation for a real relationship, no shit.

You're just saying, can you keep me entertained this summer? Yeah, but also like the positive of being single over this time is you don't have to buy extra presents for this person. Yeah, totally. You're saving money. Yeah, and you can do whatever you want over your holiday break and not have it taken up by like, here we go, you know, buy a toaster. Choosing someone for emotional cushioning often leads to mismatched short-lived relationships.

Focus on connection, not coupling. Spend time with friends, say yes to social invitations, volunteer. Oh, that's a great thing to do over this time of the year. And you're there like, oh my God, this is so nice that you're pouring soup for people and you're like, I'm just lonely. And I just needed the company, but you're still doing the work. Another question people have been asking Is Christmas

Is a Christmas proposal Romantic or reckless? I really hate when people propose around families And they do like a whole show And mum and dad are there And it's I feel like that's not a family Yeah

Environment to do it But they say engagement commonly rise During the holidays Due to relax vibes Family gatherings But a lot of the therapists are saying that it's not a great time To make a romantic gesture

propose when you're emotionally ready not because you're just in a festive mode and you've had a champagne for breakfast. You're like, we should just do this forever. We should just, I love you. And you're like, no, the sun is shining and you're drunk. Yeah.

Don't do that. Should you delay a breakup until after the holidays so that you're not leaving them lonely? No perfect time for a breakup, therapists say. Delaying often causes more harm as one partner checks out emotionally. Yeah, but remember, Vaughn was dumped on Christmas Day. He was.

How long ago was that, like 30 years ago? And he still talks about it. And he still talks about it. Like, that's trauma. I think you have to, like, plan it for, like, the Christmas Eve Eve. Yeah. You know? The day before Christmas Eve or just after Christmas Day.

Christmas Eve. Yeah, Christmas Eve. What about Boxing Day morning so then you can go shopping? I was just going to say, retail therapy right after. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm so sorry, it's over, but there's 70% off and you can go buy a new kettle. Yeah, they are saying if you are going to break up during the holidays, a private moment because you're often surrounded by family.

Oh no, I take them off to your childhood bedroom. I know, take them to your childhood bedroom, dump them, tell them about all the boys you shagged in there, and then leave them sitting in there looking at your old Hansen posters while you go out and hang out with your family. Oh, no. Yeah. This is traumatic.

I've been with my partner for about six years, and we've only spent one Christmas together. Why? Why? I feel like the best of both worlds. Well, he's off working on cruise ships. Oh, does he spend Christmas alone? Yeah.

What does he eat on the cruise ships for Christmas? Oh my goodness, it was the best. Because I spent Christmas on a cruise ship two years ago. And it was the best Christmas ever. What have we gone? Sorry, Mom and Dad, if you're listening, but... Wow. It was just like the best food and it was so fun

and it was just kind of this crazy day where nothing was real. Because we were on the sea the whole day and you kind of just were like, wow, nothing's real. There's no drama, no mums are upset. No one's having to do the path. Yeah, yeah, no upset moms. I said to my mum yesterday we were planning Christmas

because I'm hosting again. And if you don't remember the first time I hosted, which was two years ago, I at one point screamed, I'm not enjoying this. And I said to mum, I was like, I want low pressure. I want food that has been like pre-prepped and ready to go. And I just want us to sit around. We're doing no gifts. We're doing a donation instead.

And I said that we're going to focus on the cocktails. And mum was like, great. This sounds good, nice and easy. And then I literally saw the bitch. Sorry, I didn't call my mom a bit. Literally saw the bitch. Flipping through recipes. And I saw a list and she's got a ham.

A roast beef, a chicken, roast veggie salads, fresh salads, a salmon starter, pudding, all organised. Why have you got a farm happening? Well, actually, well, don't come crying to me when you're crying alone in the kitchen and I'm drunk. Yeah. The ZDM Podcast Network. What's going on?

ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Haley. Launching today in Australia, which always makes me feel like we'll get it soon, ish, we're always a little bit behind. I mean, I'm popping over to Australia next weekend and should I just bring some back? Oh, no, you're talking. Yes.

Can you take that? Sure. Yes, and then we should all do them on air and just have like a fun on-air surprise. Brilliant. These are new pregnancy tests called the Sally Stick. It's a really good name. Sally Stick, launching in Australia today.

It is a new pregnancy test that you use saliva from the mouth as opposed to saliva from the vagina. Of course. Yeah. It is wild though. They haven't changed pregnancy. tests in 70 years. For 17 years it's been paying on a stick.

What was it before then? Have a look. No, I was watching a documentary on this. You know, I love my weird documentary. And back in the Egyptian days, they used to pee on there was this special type of grass. Yes. And they would pee on it and based on how the grass would react and it was like 90% accurate.

I saw this on The Great. You know, the TV show The Great about Catherine the Great. And there's a moment where she pees up. They bring in some special grass. It's this weird grass. It's like one of the most accurate ways you can actually test. So this would still work in 2025.

Yes, yeah, people still do it. What? Okay, I love this. What is the grass? I was going to see if it's available in New Zealand because like pregnancy tests are expensive. Yeah, man. What is the grass you pee on to tell if you are prego? Because I think on that TV show she also pees on a tote.

Yes, but that feels witchy. Barley and, rather barley and wheat seeds used in ancient adjacent adjacent. method for pregnancy testing, not a form of modern or reliable medical testing. Yeah, but like it's better than nothing. If you already knew you were pregnant, fun to try out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, if you weren't relying on it for accurate information.

Well, the Sally Stick is saliva base. You swab the mouth to detect HCG, which is a pregnancy hormone, which is the same thing that they're testing in your urine when you pee on the stick. Decades of research have led to this. It's got a 96% accuracy one day after a missed period.

Wow, that's quick. It gets higher as the days go by and the more pregnant you are, I guess. So you'd probably do this initially after missing a period and then a few days later do a P1 to confirm. Yeah, maybe. But I don't know why it's not necessarily cheaper. $16.95 is going to be available at pharmacies and at Coles, which is their like pack and savey kind of cheap supermarket.

They're saying it's more hygienic, non-invasive than urine testing because, yeah. You do piss on your hands. Because sometimes there are some pregnancy tests that come with the little pee tray and you pee in the tray and then you bring that out and you dip the stick. I just stick it, I raw stick it in the stream.

There's something so humiliating about it. Even though you're alone, like you're sitting there and you'll just say, oh man. There's also, there's no way you're not getting pee on your hands. And I always think this when I think of those because you put the cap on, right? But it's still there's piss everywhere. I know, and then people will like put it in a cake.

I'll give it. I always think that's when people do the big pregnancy things like, and they shove it in their, like, partner's face or something. I'm like, that is shrouded in piss. A pregnant piss, how beautiful. I know, what a beautiful miracle. So apparently you've got to wait 30 minutes after eating or drinking, because, yeah, if you've just had like a berry smoothie,

that's not good. You don't want your coffee being pregnant. Oh, it's like, oh, this made me want to be sick. It's like, remember those COVID tests, not the one where you swab, but we had to fill a vial with your foamy spit. And we had to do it here at work. We had to prove them here. And then you weren't allowed to like,

you had to take a photo of it here at work. And it was like your foamy spit. So this was, this is a, you have to get a saliva pool. Put your collection foam. Oh, not the phone. You insert the thing into the. Maybe I'd just rather piss all my hand.

I'd rather piss all over my hand. The Z&M podcast network. Play ZM's Flash for in Haley. From the Fletch Vaughan and Haley group chat, this is the top six. Hi, well, Fletch and Vaughner away, so it's Carmen, Shannon and Haley today. On a girls-only show, girls' rule, boys' droll. Yeah, of course. And of course, that leaves me with the top six.

And something I, I sat at a boy's house last night, guys. Is that why I was late? No, he was asleep. But I had a shower. And so was I. He literally was just a sleep. I had a shower at this boy's house yesterday and yeah, it's

the only form of shampoo available to me was head and shoulders two and one. Oh no. Yeah, okay, so we took a deep breath but my hair was grottie yesterday. It was a real dry shampooy. I actually hadn't washed it since tool and it was like sweaty.

Yeah, it was yuck. And so I was like, I'm just going to give it a wash and in the morning my goal was I'll come to work early, I'll go down stairs and I'll give it a blow wave. And instead I slept in and I've run and I've got you know my cowlicks sort of flicking around but guys my hair is so soft.

Really? Like it feels voluminous. I didn't blow dry. I slept on it wet and I woke up this morning and I was like what is this silky, heavenly situation on my head? It's soft. It feels voluminous. It feels vibrant. It feels vivacious. And I was like I spend like I can't, I will not even say on air, how expensive my shampoo and conditioner

is. But it will make your anus pucker. Like it is... Yeah, yeah. Not good. Did you two and won it so much so that it, like, actually did... Like, you put it through all of your hair. I literally put it root to tip. I know. That's bold. And I think this could be my new way forward.

And you can get, by the way, from show spot, chemis warehouse, ding, ding the bell car. When you're on bell duties... Oh, yeah. ShowSpot KPI's. You can get that from chemis warehouse. And I think maybe I'm just going to make the switch. So I have today for you the top six other benefits, other than great hair from using their two and one, of sleeping at a boy's house.

Number six on the list, their deodorant's so much stronger than ours. Oh, absolutely. Oh, my God. Like recently, I'm thinking of making a switch. And I'm, oh, did I buy? I went to chemistry warehouse yesterday. Hang on. Hang on.

Stay with. What, like, what is the reason for making girls' deodorant less effective? Yeah. And then it gives you a little waft later in the day and you're like, ooh. Yes. When you're with a boys one, you're like, oh my God, is there a man around me? You're like, no, that's your pets. And I, yeah, every time I use boys' dieter,

I'm always like, this is far superior. It does mingle with the perfume in a way that's not so pleasant. So you've got to tap out of the perfume. It's pretty good. Number five on the list of the top six, other benefits of sleeping at a boy's house. Radox does awaken the senses. It's a citrusy waft.

It'll give you a tingle. This was almost like a parody of a boy's shower at this guy's house, by the way. Head and shoulders two and one and radox body wash. No lufa, no flannel, so I'm raw dog radoxing on the hands and sort of hand smearing. But I'm clean, and it's got a tingle. Don't put it downstairs. Number four on the list of the top six other benefits of sleeping. The night at a boy's house, it doesn't matter if you get makeup on their mixed-matched sheets.

You just can't tell. Like the bottom one's blue, the top one's like burgundy or something. Well, and that's the thing. It never matches, but it also never is a colour that would show up. No, no, no. It's pre-stained. Pre-stained. The guys love a dark sheet.

Yeah. And I've smeared makeup all over these patterned catastrophes. And I was like, I won't even mention it. No. Because at some point maybe in a month or two, he'll wash them. And he'll get it out. Fingers crossed. Number three on the list of the top six other benefits of sleeping the night at a boy's house.

There are endless options for baggy t-shirts to sleep in, varying degrees of cleanliness. But it does make you feel quite small. You know when you put on a boy's tea? Yeah. Oh, my God, I'm so tiny. Except like that jarring time. I remember when I was single and I got with a short king

and I remember it was not a baggy tea. It was a fitted baby tea on it. And it was humiliating. There's nothing worse than being like, oh my God, I love this like oversized little tea. And then as you put it over your shoulders, you're like, shit. It fits.

Yeah, that fits. The boobs fill it out. It's a baby tea. Okay, that one's not so good. Number two on the list of the top six are the benefits of sleeping the nighted boys' house. I will say that the reused power A bottle next to the bed actually does hold quite a bit of water.

and it's a fine drinking receptacle. No. Aesthetically, I am aghast at it. But I didn't have my water bottle in the house last night. And so... And you get that nice little tang? And the little suctiony. There's something fun about it.

Yeah, and there's just a slight... of power aid left in there. In your water and you're like, what is that? What is the flavour of blue? Blue. Blue. It's just blue.

Number one on the list of the top six are the benefits of sleeping the night at a boy's house, you are never alone. Thanks to the endless amounts of Lord of the Rings and Batman figurines watching your every move. Oh, no. Yeah. You're just looking at them like, hey, Legerlus.

You're even learning the names? Oh, don't. No. No. That one's an obvious one. Is it? There's so many Batman's in this room. I don't know what to do about it. That is today's top six.

The Fletchborn and Haley, big pod. Now, Carwin, you're a renowned feet hater. Oh my God, if I have to see a foot ever. And you know what? This story is actually like giving me the shakes or something. Yeah, I feel you're a bit jittery, having to look at all these feet. There's a video going around on TikTok at the moment of a new type of tights. So like stockings, tights, whatever you call them.

Panty hose. Panty hose, if you're fancy. We're not wearing them at the moment. Obviously, it's summer. It'd be way too hot in Auckland, especially. I haven't worn them all winter either. I think because I've spent so much money on tattoos recently, the idea of covering them up.

I think I've worn Panyahu's like twice this year. Though there is something quite cool about the tattoo through the stock. Yeah, I love that too, like she's sneaky cool. Yeah. And there was a big trend over winter as well of people wearing like colored tights, like the maroon tight and stuff, which can look really good also can be a bit 2008. Yes, it's really cute.

Yes, yes, yes. Well, there is a new type of tight going around that is solving the issue of that seam line at the front of the foot. that kind of brings itself forward a bit and like pinches throughout the day. Pinsches the toes and it kind of gathers them. Yes. So I want you to picture toe socks, you know, the socks that separate out your little toes mixed with stocking.

So they are toe stocking. What's their purpose though? Is it just for comfort? I guess so. There's this big barefoot community on TikTok and basically people will have these custom shoes that mold around the actual shape of your foot. But also now people are like those shoes are too. expensive so they'll just buy normal sneakers and cut out the bottom so they don't look like

they're barefoot in public but they are because also there are some places you can't just be barefoot in public i just can never imagine when you go to someone's house and in new zealand we do this a lot shoes off inside yes if i invited someone to my house and i was like hey shoes off and they took off their shoes it revealed their little toe panty hose all individually spread out and also just like if they don't have like the tidiest of toenail yeah individually snagging through each one and actually this woman has a toe ring. No, well, she, I don't mind if I'm going anything. She's just wearing the toe ring on top or under.

Oh, yeah. Ew, yeah. Imagine she's like just dressing myself for the day, but my little stockings on and then on one top. Slide my ring over the top. I'm ready for the day. Absolutely not. No thanks.

The ZRAM Podcast Network. Flatfront and Haley, silly little pole. Silly little pole. It is so silly, silly, silly, silly that the silly little silly little pole silly little pole silly little pole today's silly little pole

is thanks to Mick Cafe keep the show on the road drive through Mick Cafe for your morning fix and the question we asked you is what does your Christmas day look like this year? Are you hosting? Are you going to someone else's house or a bit of both?

I am hosting for the third year oh no no second year second time that I've hosted at my house last year was my own day honestly I screamed the first time because I also took hosting as I was going to do

all of the cooking as well no no no no yeah and I was like I've got it and I did not have it and I went over the top and I did like duck fat potatoes and then like I don't have a massive oven so then I was and I didn't know the timing and then you don't enjoy Christmas Day

I hated it you know what I'm sort of hosting this year because I was like I need to combine my family and my partner's family where can we meet in the middle Wellington we don't have a house in Wellington but do you know who does my auntie so I'm like everyone come to my auntie's house was auntie like okay I think she's loving it I'm hoping she's loving it she'll text me and let me know but like I think it's kind of hosting but with a little less stress you're the hosting glue yeah so wait your your families are having Christmas together. Yeah. Big, big milestone. This is a big moment. It's giving, I would like

a ring, I would like a daven ring, I would like a daven ring, I'm a wedding thing around, I'm like a Johnny Naaman. Wow. Can you imagine me hosting in the apartment? Jesus, take the wheel. My 37 metre square apartment. Yeah, no. We can't fit two people. No, and that you've got the one and a half person couch. Yeah, no. Do you have a dining table? Uh, kind of. Like a little plinth. Yeah. We have a plinth. A dining plump. Yeah, well, Carmen actually gave me a bean bag and it's changed my life. How does a beanbag fit in there, not another human? Well, because I sit on the floor to eat dinner, so now I sit on a

bean bag. Oh, yeah, nice. It's great. Well, I'm attending. Okay, you're attending, you're co-hosting, but it's someone else's house, but will you be leading the food? No, I think my auntie will, but we've definitely been conversing on who's bringing what. Yeah, okay, nice. And I'm fully hosting

but I'm taking my hands off and giving it back to Patsy because, oh my God, I hated it. Well, the majority at 59% said I'm going to someone else's house, probably going to mum and dad's. Big mum and dad energy. 23% of people said I'm hosting and 18% of people said a little bit of both.

Some feedback. Dan says none of the above on a friend's cruise, darling. I'm telling you, cruising on Christmas, it was one of the best. On a boat, I say, on a cruise on Christmas. Plenty of people cruising on Christmas. I mean, that's also fun. The parks are basically empty.

Michelle said my sisters with family and we're ordering some box she's organized. We've all just had to put money in for it, not spending the day in the kitchen. Love that. Those like pre-prepared Christmas boxes, I love that. Megan said I'm working both Christmas and New Year's this year. What do you do, Megan?

Thank you for your service. We're assuming it's like caring for people. Yeah, I mean, any service of working on Christmas, you deserve a clap. Yeah, actually, for sure. Isn't McDonald's open on Christmas? Yeah, and I think Denny's as well. That's crazy, actually.

That's crazy. I mean, I'd love a little Denny's lap put after Christmas. Taylor says, I'm on call for the hospital. So I have no idea what I'll be doing. Actually, that's our Mick Cafe voucher winner. $50 Maccafei voucher for Taylor for your service on Christmas Day. If you're called up, and if you're not called up, we're going to need that voucher back. No.

Chavon says option D escaping to Bali, baby. Oh my God I thought about it before Maybe going to Thailand on Christmas Just like on my own What about Barley Belly on Christmas though Do they celebrate Christmas over there Like what would it be like?

No I don't think that they would really I don't think there's I don't know It feels like every day's Christmas in Bali There Do they celebrate Christmas in Bali It wouldn't be because that's not Like Christianity is not their primary

Religion but it's all set up for tourists So no doubt be a bloody blast. Deborah says, I'm hosting no one. We decided we are staying home. If you want to see us, that's where we'll be. Love that. I love that too. Amy says,

oh my God, I nearly said the word. She cursed. I went to censor when I was screenshoting and I was like, Haley, will not say the F word. I'm not a professional. I don't know what I'm doing here. This is Vorn's job. She says F year. Now, the F stands for a swear word

we can't say on here. Come on over. I'll make food, you bring the booze. Adam says, just us at home, hopefully, drinking beer and watching die hard. We love that. Denise says, but mum and dad are bringing 80% of the kai. I'm hosting, but mom and dad are bringing

the food. That's a great compromise. And Carolyn says, wow hecker, darling. Two weeks at mum and dad's house. That's, you're taking the piss there. We're staying at mom and dads. Two weeks at mom and dad's house, relaxing on island time. My favorite. favorite place. So we asked you for silly little poll. You're going to do the head move. Are you hosting, attending or a bit of both for Christmas this year? And 59% of you said that you're basically going to mum and dads.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flashhorn and Haley. Jacob Alorty is being absolutely rinsed online, ridiculed after people have clocked at a Hollywood his handwriting and they're saying he's a 10 but his handwriting needs improving. I wish Vaughan was here because honest I don't, you know, we're having a lovely time, just the gals. But Vaughan's handwriting is shocking.

I have noticed it seems to be a male thing. Yes. Yes, for sure. I don't know, is that because we're more like ascetically minded so we put a bit more effort in? I wonder if we're a bit more dexterous because often we'll wear makeup. Good bit of their hands. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, a bit of the hands in general, makeup. But yeah, thinking about like eyeliner and stuff, I feel like we've kept the skill going of using a pen at least. I feel like a lot of men, you don't see them pick up a pen ever. Stop using pens. That's a good thought, actually. I remember consciously curating my handwriting, which is very curly-whirley at high school

because I wanted to be interesting. And I wanted people to be like, oh my God, her handwriting. And now I have it, and it's like, it looks gorgeous, but it's like illegible. Yeah, I mean, I remember the day I distinctly changed from doing an A, the normal way, to the fun way with the hat. And I was like, I'm going to be that girl. Are you still that girl? Still that girl?

I don't really know how to do it the old way now. Yeah, I did that. And I tried to do E's as like backward threes. Yeah. And the hat A's, I was trying, I did anything to have a personality. I know. And anything that I thought like I was going to be like the bell or the ball, like every man would want me because I put a hat on my A and I was 13 years old. She is so interesting.

Well, what's your handwriting? Like, I feel like I don't really know. It's not that bad, but it's also bad. No, it's all right. Yeah. You've written on my sheet here. Yeah. But that's quite scribbly, you know, like, if I'm writing a card.

Yeah. But sometimes I will write a birthday card and I'm like, I'm embarrassed. Yeah, me too. We just don't use pens enough. We don't. And I'm losing my finger bump, my pen bump from, you know, years of writing with a pen. Doing essays. Yeah, Jacob Lorde's, this is bad.

It looks like he wrote it with his feet. So, it was this, like, it does. It was this Hollywood event where, They were typewriting out words of wisdom, and his was, be funny when you can. Okay, it's very earnest. I'm sorry, in itself, I hate.

But underneath here, just sign his name, and it does, it's straight up, it looks like he switched hands and wrote it like a baby. My thing is, if we're going to start, if you're dating someone new, how do you figure this out? Because is this going to cause an actual irreversible ick?

Well, so I, when I started dating my partner, the magician, I see him write on cards all the time. And, yeah, I remember being like, whoa, that's crazy, man. His must be quite nice, professional. I love that, man. Beautiful. And that's all I'll say on that. Despite some of his floors.

Someone just texted, I'm a primary teacher over the years. What I've noticed, all the young students have terrible, oh, young student teachers, sorry, have terrible handwriting because they're just constantly on technology and phones. So then it's teaching us to be bad as well. And then we learn it, because we had the half line and the dash line, to learn it all properly. Do they still do that?

I don't know, none of us have kids. So I mentioned earlier, I sat at a boy's house last night. So I just messaged him before. Is he awake? One I gave him, oh, he's an early riser, green flag. Men who sleep in? Just like wake up, man. Oh, yeah, wake up.

Cafe Diem, homie. I messaged him before. One, I gave a great review of the two-for-one, head and shoulders shampoo that are used in his shower. He did not know how that sentence was. going to end. Gave him a great review of last night. No, no, no.

10. Anyway, out of 10. Good for you. Thank you. Stop it. Anyway, Seva, what am I saying? I was just going to say, the time weirdly. Oh, I message him and I said, I'm flustered.

I said, do you have nice handwriting or boy handwriting? And he said definitely boy handwriting, not help by being on my phone or typing. It means I'm out of practice. Proven our theory. But now I'm like, do I want to see this? Well, do you want to ask him how he is with winged dialogue? Maybe that'll prove my theory. Okay.

Can you do a cat eye? But also insane. Hang on, I'm voice noting. It's just the way of doing it. By the way, just long throwback. Jason Moore never responded to my voice note. Oh no, okay. Oh, sorry, this is a voice note.

Hey, quick question. Do you, what, do you, are you good at putting on eyeliner? Bye. That was totally worth voice noting, Kaylee. That was, that was, that was, that was, yeah. It's quite fun. seeing you in this new stage. It's so...

It's... I'm so bad at flirting or any kind of boy interaction. Hang on, I also had a British teacher for one year and she effed up my whole thing with cursive. He said thing. With a name. Like...

Oh, maybe that's worse than a handwriting. Yeah, okay, we'll just leave that. We'll just leave that. Play that ends, Fleshhorn and Haley. And right now on our girls' only show we're going to play a new game. Hey you on the phone, I bet I can guess When your periods due.

Yeah, you know what? Guessing your mum's name is a special skill given to Vaughan and Vaughn only, you know? And we're not here to try to pretend like we have those skills. No. But what we do possess is a unique set of skills where the three of us are able to tell we're your periods due based on five questions that we're going to ask you. And if we get it right, you win $100. Yes.

And you'll kick off the bonus round. which I also think is going to be a lot of fun and Sarah joins us. Good morning, Sarah. Good morning. How are going? Really good. Well, my period is due I would say today because yesterday I was literally saying to my friend and my parents

oh, I'm feeling really good. I'm in such a good mood and like I feel like my period's supposed to be Jew and I like none of the symptoms have happened then I felt that familiar twinge Sarah in my left over and then my day turned to crap because my house had too much dust on it. So that's me.

That'll do it. So what we're going to do, Sarah, is we're going to ask you a series of questions, five questions, and I'm going to get the specific date. Now, do you know the exact day that your period is due? I do, yes. Yeah, I've got it down.

Okay, we're going to work that out. The first question is, do you have a partner? I do, yeah. He, she, they? He, yes. If he was to eat a bowl of food around you quite noisily today, how'd you feel about that? Oh, not good, not positive.

I'd probably get him to quieten it down a bit. Yeah, yeah, coin it down a bit. But on my mind, like, that kind of like where they're breathing and noisy happens, like, quite far out. Yeah. So I would, it's a week, it's the 25th of November today. Yeah, it's giving maybe 30. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 30th, 30th November. I've got a question if I can go next.

Hang on, I'm just going to go. I'm going to go 1st of December because that's six days. So I go December 1st as well because, yeah, that's giving like a big week-out energy. I'm going to chuck the second in there as well. 10th of November. All right, Shannon, you go. Sarah, how would you feel about wearing white pants today? Not positive.

I probably wouldn't do white pants at any time, to be fair. Do you know, I literally wore white shorts yesterday And I was like, that's a maniacal mood Given my app It's very brave Should we say the 26th of November? Yeah, maybe it's imminent Although she did say that she wouldn't often wear white pants

So is it like a, we don't know It could be a red shirt. Yeah, yeah Is this a Karen situation? One, two, one, two, three Should I, I'm going to put the 23rd of December Because she could be throwing us off here Because her partner could annoy her all of the time

Yes and white jams could always be a no-go for her because it's just not her fashion. Yeah, totally. All right, producer carwin. Sarah, what level of hunger are you experiencing today? So far not too bad. Just, you know, just the average.

Had a little bit of breakfast. But, you know, just average. What did you have for breakfast? I just had a banana this morning. Just a banana. Oh, that's not nice. That's probably on the November thing because I would be... Yeah, no, that's...

We're going later. I'm going to go 10th. Yeah. That's giving me the 10th. That's two weeks away, basically. I'm going 9th and 10th in there. Because before, when I'm on my period, I'm going carbs. I'm going scones.

I'm going no nutritional value. I'm going double breakfasts. I'm going to add 10, 9, 11. Okay. Sarah, are we rocking any facial pimples today? Good question. Let me have a look. Oh, yeah, there's the odd.

one, there's a little chin one. Chin. Yeah, chin. Chin's hormonal, right? Again, but just one? It's feeling like... It's at end of this week. It's start of December.

End of this week, you reckon. So you've got to go to the 28th, 28th, put that on. Okay. The 28th, because my skin goes absolutely crazy at the moment. Was that our last question? No, no, I've got one more. One more, I believe. Yeah, one more.

Sarah, if you could just give your if I may ask your breasts a small squeeze just on your own and give us the tenderness level of that if it's sore or just absolutely fine Yeah, they're a little bit sore I'm just in traffic

We appreciate you making up For me it's the third I think we're like eight days away I just keep seeing 28 in my brain Okay, I'll put 28 on the I'm going to put the 29th. I mean, I really wanted to get this because even if you know, we could send her off to Chemist Warehouse

get some pads, some bloody, some painkillers. All right, I think we've got enough numbers to win this. Okay, are we ready? All right, if you hear the date that your period is due, Sarah, we want you to say, stop. I'm pleading. Say stop, that's the date my period's due. Are you ready?

I'm ready. Your time starts now. November 30th. November 26th, November 27th, November 28th, November 29th. The 1st of December, the 2nd of December. December 23rd. That's the road period, too. The 2nd of December?

It is. Yes. It's a week away today. That's it because your partner's just starting to irritate you, but your skin's good and you're not too hungry at the moment. White shorts, a general no-no for you, Sarah. Yeah, yeah, just generally not. Not with kids.

You never know what you're going to get on you. Oh, God, no. Oh, God, no. Well, well done. You've won $100 and you've kicked off our bonus round.

The bonus round. While you're on the phone, I'll have a go, a guessing. The way that, your collection method. For an extra $100 with no extra questions asked, the three girlies

are going to try to guess what collection method you use, tampons, pads, cup, undies. She's given us a hint by the fact she has kids. I think that'll come into it. See, this is why. That's exactly what I thought I said tampons. It's easy.

Always have them in your bag. Discrete. Really? Yeah. See, I would have gone for sake of ease a period undie. Yes, but then that requires more washing and she's already doing a lot of washing with kids. And I think a disc is too much work. Disc is way too much work.

No, she's not giving disc. I agree with Carlin. I'm learning on tampons. You think it's tampons? We could have a free bleeder. I don't know. It's not really... It doesn't give me freebleed energy.

No, no, no, no, no. That's not why she's not wearing the white shorts. I'm just going to text this, see the text machine and see if anyone has... Someone said, can boys not play this game? Well, if you get a period, absolutely you can. But, um... Okay, Sarah, we're locking in for an extra

$100. Is your collection method of choice? Tampons. Oh you guys nailed it It is Well done Sarah You have won $200 playing the first round Of bet I can guess

When your period's due 200 bucks or a week out from the period That's going to be good That is amazing Thank you so much girlies And I'm loving that all-girls show It's great It's bloody fun

And I tell you what I think I might be sinking the girls up With my ovaries today I've got alpha ovaries She has big alpha ovaries, energy. You walk past her and you feel it. You do. You're like magnets.

Better both buy some chocolate this morning. Thank you so much, Sarah, for playing. Stay there. We'll get some information from you. The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Flesh, Forne and Haley. We want to hear from you listeners about when you had to pee in public. I mean, endlessly for me.

I've got one kidney, and I'm a woman, and I drink so much water. Didn't you literally pay in your driveway a few weeks ago? Yeah, because I couldn't make it out of the car. Well, I made it just out of the car. I guess it was kind of public because the gate was open you could see in. But Justin Bieber was playing golf. I don't know, he golfed. He gives golf energy in the sense that he just hits it but doesn't go get his ball.

Has a handicap of 10.2. Is that good? Is that? Yeah, that's very good. If you don't know, this, producer Shannon comes from a golfing family. Your dad is a greenskeeper? Yes, yeah, but I grew up on a golf course. Grew up in a golf course?

Yeah, it's impressive. I don't have a proper one. Oh, okay. But my dad's offer too, so that's very good. Wow. Well, he was playing golf and there was paparazzi footage of him having to spring a leak after drinking what was said to be a couple of IPAs. Beer runs right through me. So he's pulled down his awful shorts.

The jorts are bigger than his whole wingspan. Yes. And it is such an ick. And then he pulls them up and you can see his underwear still. And he's just, just sort it out. Yeah, it's a bit, okay. I will say in the underwear there is a significant. There's a bulge.

Bulge. We all saw it. We all saw it. We all saw it. She's just been clocked. Anyway, but, yeah, obviously he couldn't make it to the toilet on time. Paid on the side of a golf course. Would your dad, a golf course greenskeeper, appreciate this?

I think they would be more upset by his outfit than the behavior. Because I've definitely peed on a plenty of golf courses. This is like my second toilet. Maybe I shouldn't say that on national radio, but like I've peed on a menu of course. golf courses. Yeah. I mean, it's just grass. I've peed endlessly in public. I, when you've got to go, you've got to go. And I'd rather do a little pop and squat than wet my pants. But the difference here is that you guys don't have paparazzi following you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

24-7. Well, this is what we want to know this morning. Give us a text 9-696, or give us a call 0-800-ZM. When did you have to pee in public? And I'll tell you what, some messages to kick us off. I was busting, so I peed in the Uniccar park at 2 a.m. There are cameras and I am now famous. And my favourite one to come in so far, I had to pee in a bucket in the Johnsonville BK drive-thru

as Z wouldn't let me in to pee. Oh no. And not in a drive-thru. You're paying in a bucket. And then what are you tipping it as you sort of speed off on State Highway 1? Also, do you just carry a bucket with you at all times? Where did the bucket come from? Where did the bucket come from? We need more information. Follow up, please.

When did you have to pee in public? Give us a text, 966, or a call, 800 dial Z-ZM. When you had to pee in public, because Justin Bieber was caught paying on the side of a golf course after a couple of frothy IPAs, and no shortage coming through. My friend had to pee in a questionable area. It was back in the day, maybe 2010,

in the Octagon in Dunedin. Oh, that's seen some piss. There's an old-school red telephone box right next to the night and day dairy. She was busting and pissed in there, but the walls of the telephone box don't go to the ground, and there's a hill, and the box is situated on, so it just dribbled along the footpath.

Oh no. Man, that's grim. I was smart, stopped roadside in a heavily bushed area, remote road, hadn't seen a car in 20 minutes. Went into the bush, a good five metres, got caught mid-squot by a pig dog, followed closely by their hunter. What are the odds?

Cheap, a pig dog? What is that? Like the dog that goes and gets the pigs? I thought it was like a mutant animal, and I was like, we need to tell. Of course you thought that. Alicia, you're on the phone. Where did you have to pee in public?

Yeah, so my best be at Symphony at the beginning of the year. Yes. Yes, bless her, bless your little cotton socks. She, when having a few little bevies, has to go every 10 to 20 minutes. It's a big corporate those bevies, isn't it? Yes, big. culprit.

But yes, and we had pretty much just come back from, yes, another toilet stop, and no one wanted to go back again. So she was like, well, what do I do? I don't want to go by myself. So she pretty much squatted down right in the middle of the crowd. Oh, just in the middle of the

delation, no. Literally right in the middle. And we just kind of gathered around her a little bit. She went and And we're just going to cover to her a little bit. And everyone was walking past like, is she okay? Is she all right? She's fine.

Yeah, she's just feeling a little bit. Alicia, that's so grim. Thanks for that story. Yeah, that's grim. Thanks for that grim story. Keep your test coming in 9-6-96. When you had to pee in public. Where did you have to pee in public?

Some quick messages. I got peed on by someone who popped a squat next to me. And GA at 660. Those plastic tiles they put down on the field really made it splatter up my leg. I had to pee in a bush at the dark on Mount Peronia was a bit pissed and the next morning realized I'd sat in a gorse bush and my cheeks were full of prickles.

Not the gorse. Cheapers. On an African safari many years ago we stopped for a wee when an elephant with an elephant in the distance the elephant got a little agitated so I got the call, get it back in the truck now!

Had to run mid-wee pulling up my pants as I ran. Do you reckon it was like out-elfering the smell? It's like I'm the only elephant in this town. Probably. It was my grandma's funeral in the weekend and we got to the cemetery to bury her. I'm so sorry to hear that, by the way.

Got to the cemetery to bury her and I was busting, so I hopped the fence and ran through the neighbouring paddock with prickles and cow shit and bare feet to pee behind a bush. Once upon a pre-child time, I had a few little drinkies at the beer fest in the Rotterua. I left scrolling the road to find my friend's car when I had the sudden urge to pop a squat, except in my glorious state, I forgot I was wearing undies.

So I accidentally just peed through the undies and had to chuck those in the bush. Like when you get in the shower And you've forgotten to take your socks off Yeah The Z&M Podcast Network Play ZDM's Fleshhorn and Haley GirlMath

Girl Mass While the boys are away in Sydney Carl and Shannon and Haley On the show today And of course we had to do an episode of Girl Math Cause why not Yeah and everyone is wanting one specific thing this summer I know

And it's something you actually have Haley It is and Paige joins us. Good morning, Paige. Morning. What do you want us to GirlMath for you today? The hottest item that you will not be alone on this for? The Ninja Slushy Machine. I've got one. I've got one.

And do you know what, Paige? I didn't pay for it. Do you know why? Because I'm on the radio. People see me stuff. And I tell you it's pretty sick. But you've got to buy it. So, fair enough. I will say, I love it. I've only had one party with it so far and it was a hit. And also, we weren't invited to that party, actually. Rudey.

Yeah. So I'll do another one. And you've got to invite Paige to now. Paige, where do you live? I live in Hamilton. Close enough. She could drive off. That's like an hour and a half from my house.

Can you pick me up on the way page? I don't have a car. Yeah, let's do it. Okay, easy. So the ninja slushie, how much is the ninja slushy now? 600. Yeah. It's a lot of money.

It's an expensive machine. Yeah. But we're going to go a method for you to be basically free. I think you end up making money. Kahnwin, do you want to kick things off. Yeah, so we're starting off real simple. The week that it is Black Friday sales have started.

Everyone is doing one and every store that seems to sell a ninja slushy is doing one. So instead of 600, right now they are on sale for 350. Oh, okay, so that's a $250 savings already. I'm just going to, I'm keeping notes. Perfect. Perfect. Okay, you've just said, by the way, page,

this is how Girl Math works. You've just made $250. Yeah. We don't actually send it to you but this is, you know, it's a sort of in theory and girl math theory. Yeah, that's now would be a time to buy it, Black Friday sales, pre-Christmas, pre-summer. This would be perfect at Christmas like a, what's that drink called? Mimosa, mimosa slushy in the morning. Amazing, actually.

In moderation, of course. Well, that leads on to my point. Something that I suck at is making cocktails and just any kind of mix. Suck it? I wasn't, I don't know if I wasn't already. I'm a real sucky at making cocktails. I wasn't ready for the term suck at. Yeah, I don't know.

But I am horrible at it. And just looking it up, for a three-day mixology course, it's about $600. Because that's the thing, Paige, with the ninja slushie. I mean, if I did manage to screw up my first one and so what was supposed to take 40 minutes, took three hours. But, like, you basically, it tells you exactly how to do it,

you just biff it in. Perfect. What would you put, what would you be your, like, go-to drink of choice? For Christmas, definitely a pinnacolata with my sister. Yum.

Frozen, that'd be so good. Oh my gosh, I'm dreaming of it. You'd be saving $600 on a mixology course. Okay, so we're taking that off the cost, $600. Is this $600? How long is it course? Three days. Three day mixology course.

And you leave with the skills but without the machine. And you still don't have the machine. Exactly. Okay, so that's a $600 savings. By the way, we're already in the negatives here. If we're going off of a Black Friday price. Yes. Yes, of course we are.

Well, I wanted to work out because the only other place I drank frozen beverageos would be like in the sunshine, with friends, rooftop bar. Rooftop bar, Waterfront, spa, whatever. For me, it'll be like the Vardacht in Auckland because I am that bad person. And I looked up where I go for my frozen margaritas.

Yes. Magaritaph. And it's $24 per margarita. Now the Ninja Slushy page makes about eight to nine servings. We'll go eight to be modest. We've got a heavy-handed pourer. So if I was to buy that same VAT worth on the Viadat, that would be $192, right?

Just for one vat of that. Now, when you buy the Ninja Slushie, obviously you have to minus the cost of a bottle of tequila, which I'll put a 65, right? And the mixer, so that's $12. So it's $15 cheaper with the Ninja Slushy. So say we're using that, say we're having five sessions on the Viaduct,

that's going to cost a whole lot more, whereas five sessions on the Ninja Slushy has saved $575. And also not to mention the parking, the fuel, and potentially driving at Uber. Because Hamilton doesn't have a viaduct, does it? Exactly. And also, it doesn't even mean alcohol alone.

The amount of things you can put in this, people are putting coconut water. I put Coke, Coca-Cola. Frozen Coke. And coffee, everyone's making fraties. Paige, when you have a hangover, do you, like, require cold beverages? Yes, I do, definitely.

Because for me, I bought Coca-Cola for a mixer for a drink. Then we didn't end up using it. Woke up the next morning, I was like, oh, I'm a bit dusty. And I opened up the fridge and was like, let's get the Coke in there. I mean, hear me out. We're going electrolytes. We could go a frozen power raid. Now we're avoiding a hospital stay.

Because we're not passing out from a lack of electrolytes. The hydration you would get from that is next level. Okay, I'm just adding together the savings. So the savings of 14 plus. if we're going to save on, let's say we're going to save on an IV drip, which is about $100. So by buying the Ninja Slushy page, you're actually saving yourself $1,530. And that's based on a conservative use of the machine of only four times, and you'll be using it so much more than that.

Definitely. I'm going to go buy it. Are you prepared to lose that amount of money by not buying it? No, so that's why I need to go get it. Go get it, baby. It's on sale at the moment. Thank you so much for playing, Paige. Thank you so much for having me. You're welcome, Paige.

Do you know a fun thing about Paige? She didn't know what Girl Mouth was at all. She's never seen it. She's running up being like, what's this silly little thing? We were like, absolutely, come on the phone, babes. The ZN Podcast Network. Well, right now at the moment, everyone's doing their raps,

Spotify wrapped and this wrapped and there's even an Uber-wrapped. I believe. Channies this year? Zero. What's for a point. Thank you. She's a classy woman. But people online are sharing their dating raps, basically looking at how many dates they went on,

a bit of a reflection. We asked some of our listeners for how the year of 2025 has been for them dating-wise. Some mixed feedback, I'd say. It's a bit rough out there. If around find out, someone said. Someone else said, in my 20s, I'm in my 20s, and this year I watched Pulp Fiction for not one,

but two men over 40, who I was in love with but not dating. It's a long movie. Tumbleweed floats across the screen, says Carly. Laura says nothing yet but once they get over this breakup, watch out. Yes, girl. Wendy, down significantly on previous years. Joey says single EF, but finally out of the closet.

Yay. We love this. We've got lots of feedback, but I've sort of made my own rap because Tinder and that, they don't actually do a proper end of year let you know how you've gone. Maybe some of them do? Maybe Bumble? I don't know, I'm not on Bumble, I'm not on Hinge.

If you've just joined the show and you're like, what's happened? Go to my Instagram, but I am single for the first time in a long time, and I've been dating, so I've done a little bit of a recap. I've omitted some information. I was just going to say, how much got to we're getting. No, we'll see. Okay, apps downloaded. This is Haley Sproul on the prowls.

What's the name of the song? I can do a fletch. Bing bing, bing, bing, me, me. No, you've got to do the karaoke version. Oh, yeah, that's got to be you. No, I'll do it. I think we're too young to know. that song.

Yeah, I don't actually know what it's cool. Band on the run. Is that what it's cool? Karaoke, yeah. Band on the run. Please don't make us feel that old, okay? Here we go. Hang on, here we go.

Intro. This is crazy. This is giving. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Sproul on the prowl. I stopped it.

Sproul on the prowl. Okay, there we go. Okay, here's my dating wrapped for the year. Apps downloaded, four. Apps deleted, one. Oh, what got the cut? Freaky wiki. Another word for a paddock.

Yeah, no, not another word for a paddock. No, that one's stuck. Okay, good. Yeah, no, no, no, we love field. Yeah, I can't say It was too much It was doing too much Number of men dated

N-A, not applicable Women, one Thank you Thank you Average hotness Now I gave all of my dates This year a score out of 10 For their hotness

Oh, that's jarring And then I divided it by the number of dates I went on 8.6 Now I am punching, I'm a 7.2 And I've been out here with 8.6s in general No, we had a couple of bloody 20s in there and a couple of fours. So it all balanced out.

Best date, a fancy Japanese restaurant and cocktails by the waterfront. Lovely. And when I saw the bill, I was like, oh, ching, ching, ching, big daddy, get the cash. Worst date in a notorious, previously condemned building covered in scaffolding,

and he smoked inside. I have so many questions. You know the building. If you're in Auckland, you'll know there was a building who's cladding. One day just started falling off. onto the street, and for years it's been wrapped in scaffolding.

I went on a date in there, and it was not a proud moment for me. The best line I've heard, I can't say on here, but it was definitely the biggest compliment I've ever received in my life. You guys know it. Who doesn't want to receive that? Thank you. The worst line, quote, you're just my type. I'm into older women. Oh, okay, okay. 36, too.

How many more dates did he get? Too many. Oh, okay. Too many. But did he had fun at his 21st that week? No. Yeah, that would definitely be, oh, so I'll add one in. The thing that made me feel the oldest,

going on a date with a guy who, limp biscuit came on and he didn't know who they were. And when we were exchanging stories, you had been at his friends 21st the night before. Okay. And I was like, my friends are getting divorced. We're in different periods of life. My most embarrassing moment,

farting loudly in the toilet bowl in his onsuit right near the head of the bed. Why is the head of the bed near the onsuit? So the head of the bed's there And then the onsuit's like right next to it The sliding door And then the toilet's like tucked in behind That's on him for design

And I did a P I did a wee-wee's and then You know and it like echoes through the bowl When there's thunder there's lightning That's not feng shui It's not feng shui And it was not fair on me The furthest distance travelled for a date

2,640 kilometres My goodness Hayley Is that passport required? That was passport required? Passport required Worst match FIFO veneers That was in Bali

We call them FIFA veneers I was feeling a bit desperate Biggest surprise was Queensland veneers Coming in I thought absolutely not my time He was a lovely guy And the worst city to swipe in I hate to say

And I say this with love and respect Palmerston North Yeah I thought it was going to be Invercarga But invoccago was coughing up the farmers And the cuties You know what I mean The hardworking land

Palmer's to North, it was slim pickings. So good luck out there to everyone for the next year of dating. It's an absolute minefield out there. The Z&M Podcast Network. Is this a show real? Play ZDN's Flesh, Forne and Haley. And it's time for Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Shannon wanted to sing that in opera.

They said no. It's crazy, man. I did it for Carwin multiple times yesterday and she just kept ignoring me. I'm going to say it was lacking in bass. I'm really feeling that was the first time today I felt the lack of the boy's presence. It's just some feedback in the moment. I'm just being honest with you. Woman to woman, that's a feminist thing to do.

Yeah, no, and I appreciate it. I might go down for the next one. Okay, sorry. Okay, today's fact of the day in this week, that is temperature week. which off-air we were just discussing. It's giving calendar week. Maybe. Worth than calendar week.

It's just not sexy. And like the fact that he's left us with it feels a bit like rude. It feels a conscious move. Yeah, he's like, I don't want the girls to have a great day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because then what if the fact of the day and they're just like, give it to the girls now? Anyway, today's fact of the day and this was gift. Don't come at me for this because this was left behind from Vaughn.

Celsius, the... You're going to throw up. You hated that much. I've got a hiccups. I don't know why. I've drunk made water funny. She's having so much fun. Yeah, I've got the hiccups.

Celsius originally ran backwards. So instead of zero being freezing and 100 being boiling, zero was boiling and 100 was freezing, the guy who came up with the Celsius scale and is Celsius. Ego. What an egotist. Classics man. Classics.

Classic male behavior. He thought that having zero is boiling and 100 is freezing was more elegant and no one else was doing it and no one else thought so. It just made sense to be higher, hotter, lower, colder. Yeah, 100%. Because that's just the way it works. After he died behind his back over his grave,

they flipped it and made it that way. He said numbers, he said it was a big astronomy and math guy and he liked descending numbers for increasing coldness. He thought numbers go. going down, felt warmer, and numbers going up. Things felt colder. And he said it felt mathematically neat and tidy. Imagine being so smart, you could do all this,

but being so dumb that you're that wrong. Yeah. So his colleagues quietly waited for him to die. They all disagreed with him and they just thought this was so stupid. He died in 1744. So this has been around for a long time. Age 42, that same year, his fellow Swede, Carl Linnaeus, flip the scale

zero freezing 100 boiling and that is a version that we know today as it should be so the fact I mean the fact was fine that he left us

but sort of in general it just doesn't feel like one that I'm going to be like oh my gosh I heard this amazing fact yeah like I think Haley would have come up

with her own amazing fact yeah yeah I actually could have and I wish that I had of now but I just didn't and I just read what was given to me and actually I feel sort of empty

and rather disappointed at the end of it it's just like a man putting words in a woman's mouth yeah What would make you feel better? What? Singing, Fact of the Day, opera style?

No. I felt it would. We just don't want people just leaving. They'll leave. Someone actually messaged and saying, I thought the Fact of the Day song was pre-recorded and this is proven that it's not. Yeah, it's not.

So today's Fact of the Day is that the Celsius scale, originally by the guy that created it, was backwards. Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. The ZM Podcast Network Play ZM's Fleshfallen and Haley And Shannon, you're a bridesmaid. I'm a bridesmaid for the first time this week. First time!

I've done so much. I'm in three bridal parties at the moment. But this is the first one actually, you know, the idios are happening. What? Like the weddings this week Oh right, right, right Your other ones are to come Yeah, yeah right

I was going to say that's surprising But also you are significantly younger than May So it's sort of now's the time That your friends are starting to get married Yeah, so I'm 26 So 10 years That's right, there's 10 years between you and May And 10 years between me and Fletch

Yeah Ha ha Fletch You're the oldest Are you feeling a little bit nervous about your role? It's kicked in this week I was like, okay so I got my nails down yesterday And I got it approved Proof by the bride

And like there's just lots of anxiety of I am such an extra person. I'm a spray tans girl. I'm very extra with how I am. And a lot of people aren't like this. So I'm just trying to read the vibe of like, I don't want this to be my day because it's not my day. But also like...

It's good that you know that. But also who I am as a person I know I come across a bit like that. Also, okay, the one thing you should check is if everyone in the bridal party is doing a spray tan, in particular the bride. I've had a spray tan once for a bridal party and I was the maid of honor. so I was next to the bride and she went with her natural like gorgeous pale skin

and in the photos it's humorous like it's humorous how brown I am. Yeah, I think I'm going to do a home one just to be a little chill. Oh really? Oh yeah, it's that well that's what I want to know what could go wrong being a bridesmaid

maybe this is going to make me more anxious but what 100% this is going to so you want to know what went wrong when you were a bridesmaid or a groomsman or in the bridal party in the bridal party. I've been a bridesmaid five times I think Yeah.

And the only time anything went super wrong, other than a couple of the marriages are done. That wasn't your fault. Other than that the day was like a complete waste of money. Was, oh, we were like, I was doing all my bridesmaids duty for my friend. And I was like, all I'm doing is focusing on her and the day. And then we're about to literally walk out. And I was like, who's him seeing the thing?

And she was like, oh, I just hadn't thought of that. Oh, my God. And I was like, and she looked at you. So it's me. And then I had to turn from bridesmaid to like day organizer, MC. But yeah, nothing like terribly bad. Yeah, well, it's been good talking to Carwin so much. She's been asking questions.

And I'm like, I don't know. She's like, okay, well, you should know that. How are you getting from the airport? There's no Uber and Invercargo, Shannon. Yeah, that was a wild one yesterday, actually. Yeah. Someone messaged in just now. I was actually the bride.

Something went wrong for one of my bridesmaids. my maid of honour was doing a speech about me into the microphone out of nowhere let out a massive burp. Cue, 130 people had hysterical shock laughter. People still talk about it 12 years later. Oh no, do a turn. Well, this is what we want to know this morning.

Give us a call, 0800 dial Z.m. You can text as well, 9-6-96. What went wrong in the bridal party? Right now, we want to know what went wrong when you were a member of the bridal party. Producer Shannon, you're a bridesmaid this weekend. Yes. Down in Denver Corrigal.

and you're a little bit worried about what could go wrong. It's your first time. Yeah, I just feel like I'm going to mess it up somehow. Yeah, probably. Jaina, what went wrong when you were a bridesmaid? Good morning, Jana. Hi. Oh, good morning.

Tell us what happened. I was probably about eight or nine. Bridesmaid for my cousin. Really excited all over the top, big fancy dress, you know, in the 80s, big publicity. We loved a puff. Yeah. Nobody told me that I needed to lift my dress. when going up steps.

Oh, yeah, because you... Yeah, when we were walking towards the back to them to go and sign all the license and everything, yeah, face planted in front of everybody. Oh, no, but at least you were a kid and it was sort of endearing. Do you know what I mean? It's like sort of cute.

Yeah, but it's family, so they never let me forget 20 years later. Yeah, I bet it comes up all the time. They bring it up. Jaina, thank you so much. Lisa, what happened when you were in the bridal party? Yes, so I was a bridesmaid for my friend and I just had a breast reduction

so I was very proud of my boobs Thank you I suppose to say welcome to the itty-bitty-titty community but mine have gotten significantly bigger so I've left, you've taken my spot Oh, congratulations Thank you And so I decided to go bold and brawlers

But I had to try on the dress Without a bra on And on the day could very clearly see my nipples and I didn't have anything so I improvised and salotaped tissues to my

and at the end of the night I was pulling the salar tape off and ripped off a lot of skin Oh my goodness Lisa I've ripped off my nipples before as well It's the worst It's the worst But you know the bride was beautiful

Her day went off without a hitch And I met my husband My now husband at that wedding So he obviously liked my tissue nips Does he call you tissue nips? No, he doesn't, but

you will now. I love this. Can I honestly, I'm feeling this already, can I want to give Lisa a caller of the week? Absolutely. Core of the week. We're giving you a chemist warehouse prize pack for our caller of the week. Well done, that's too good. Stay on here. Joy or we'll sort you can get your information.

Keep your text coming through, 966. Give us a call. Oh, 100,000. Z.E. And what went wrong when you were in the bridal party? Four women. On the mic. too much. Is it too much? Honestly, it's a bit much. Yeah, the estrogen. Yeah, the estrogen's really crinking in here. You were recently a bribe, but have you been a bridesmaid? Yes, for my best mate, maid of honour. How was it? Epic. The one thing that's like hard that I will say is if they've got a veil and you've got to like, if it's windy, hold that veil, but then I could feel the wind

pulling her veil and I was like, I'll loosen up a little bit, a little bit, go shit. And you're trying to reel in a fish, you're going to let it out of it and pull it back. And that was my whole mission. Was basically that. You're on veil duties. Well, right now we're hearing about maybe when being in the bridal party didn't go so well. And so bad ones so far. My auntie passed out at my mum and dad's wedding.

She was bridesmaid number three. Just hit the deck. Oh, no. I woke up with full-blown influenza two days before. And then I gave it to the bride and she woke up the day off with her. Influenza ain't no joke. And like doing your vows, you'd be all stuffed up. Your brain doesn't even function

when you're going through that, eh? So the words are just like, hey, do, I do. Awful sunburned, someone said peeling skin visible in my dress. My best friend married my ex and I was the maid of honour at the wedding. Tell us, well, modern.

The father of the groom kept bringing up the fact that the groom dated me in his wedding speech and for the rest of the night people were coming up to me and my new fiancé asking for the story of what happened. I've been a bridesmaid five times and I've got it down to such a fine art I turned it into a business and now I'm an OTD coordinator

on the day? Oh you're on the day coordinator. My worst as a bridesmaid was sunburn the makeup artist had to spend all of her time on me and not the bride. It doesn't do anything. You can't cover that. As a bridesmaid walking down the aisle the stitch in my A-line dress gave way making my girlies very exposed

had to use the bouquet of flowers to cover them up during the ceremony while standing next to the bride. Are we talking about the tartars? Well, yes, and I know this. I've learnt the rule for holding a bouquet. It's pubs, not boobs. Yeah, pubs, always pubs or boobs.

So I'm going to do that. Yeah, like this, you look silly. Yeah, so down there. The head bridesmaid, the maid of honour and bride, had a fight at the hens do. I was pregnant and sober trying to figure out what was going on. The bridesmaid ended up being kicked out of the bridal party and wedding and a scramble for another one to fill the slot.

I was a slot filler once. Is it weird being a bridesmaid? slotful. Yeah, I knew I was as well. Yeah, there's nothing worse. My friend, Haley, was like, oh, you know, I wanted you, but I just said what I was like, babe, I don't care, I'll be there. Like, it's all good, I'll chuck on the dress. Give me the dress.

Wedding and Tohanga, I drove from Wellington, left my dress and all the bridesmaids, dresses, shoes, accessories at home. Managed to get them to Tohanga in time without the bride knowing, but it was a tight time frame and very, very stressful. There's so many messages. My sister was my bridesmaid and the zip on her dress broke and my mum had to sew her into it.

Have you got, is it a good structured dress? So the dress is one of those ones you can tie it a hundred ways. So it's just a skirt with two long pieces of fabric. So I need to figure out how to get the girls in and down. Tape a man. Yeah, tape those bare boys. Oh, we've heard from a man. Morning guys, I was the best man and yes, I forgot the ring.

Remembered as we were standing there doing the formalities. Oh my God, this makes me feel so anxious. I turned to my mate, did the sign off. did the sign of putting a ring on the finger off he tottled to the motel wasn't back in time at first they didn't believe me but we used the bride's sister's ring

it actually ended up being very funny the ring arrived while we were signing the paperwork and they did it then do you know what none of it matters if I'm honest none of it matters you don't even know you're in cloud nine you stand there you could say anything

yeah and be like we don't have the rings it doesn't matter give it to me later we'll do a ceremony at the reception you know as long as the bride and group don't know. I reckon, like, for anything, that's the main advice. And you've got kind of like a chill, Brian and groom

would be good if they do find out. Yeah, they're best to be chill. Yeah. I'm so glad we made myself so much more anxious by doing this. Yeah. Well, good luck. The boys are back tomorrow morning from Sydney. Shivers, guys, 10 out of 10 podcast, that one? Yeah. I think two of us were 10 out of 10 and one of us wasn't. Or who was that? Which one?

We'll just leave that. We'll just leave that there. Well, if you enjoyed today's podcast, give us a rating and review. Please do. Unless it's a bad one. Oh, yeah, don't. Don't bother. Yeah, no, don't. Don't bother. Play ZEM's Fletchhorn and Haley.