ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Christmas Cocktail Special '25- Episode Eight

Episode Date: December 26, 2025

On Episode Eight; What the heck does the weekend smell like??See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Fleshworn and Haley's Christmas Cocktail Special Welcome to the Christmas Cocktail Special The live show on the Big Pot are back on Monday The Born, please. The live show on the Big Pot are back on Monday the 19th of Jan. Okay. Oh, I don't wait, wait. It is 10pm and this is the BBC.

I thought you'd die. No! I was okay. No, it's the radio. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. It's 11 o'clock. You're on the BBC.

It's 8 a.m. This is the BBC. I'm Will Kent from England. England says, England. Will says he wants to wish his lovely wife, Anita, a wonderful Christmas. She actually loves your festive time. When she starts about in June watching Christmas films up until December. Oh, that's nice.

Jesus, calm down Anita. Hi there was Anita's birthday in London. Seafood boiled up. Yum. Not boiled up, boil up. Seafood boil up. Seafood boil up. That's a boiler.

That's a boiler. And drinking cocktails. We're in New Zealand. We'd call that shit a boiler. That's a boilup. That's like a big vat of seafood and delicious. Goal boys in that. Food and drinking cocktails all afternoon with Jay Lisa and Cher.

Oh my God. I love Jay Lee. Lisa and Charlie. Jay Lisa and Charlie. Jesse's moment in the year. I'll just say the cocktail's a bit dry. We're out empty. I'm just, well, I'm doing a lot more of the reading.

Oh, wow. Wow. Did you hear that? Well, you can make the next cocktail because I've done one. Fletcher's done one. I'll do the next one. Why don't you shut your fucking mouth? Don't you fucking talk to me like that?

You fucking, and I'll say that to your face. You fucking look at me. You fucking little. This is the baby. I will fuck you up. I will fuck you up. Give it the fucking BBC. This is the fucking BBC.

Oh, that's a heartbeat. Oh, no, but that's not a good. Fuck you. Now to. We can spra break with Anita, relaxing massage in full and fun time in the jacuzzi bath. Wink, wink, wing, nudge, nudge, juicy smoke.

Yeah, this is one else at the onsin pools. No. Thresh those by the hour. You're talking about all the goo in there, the jizzy. It's not good if you have sex in a body of water. I did hot paws with a man this year. No naughtiness happened.

No one's believing that There are cameras in that one In Rotorua we learned Oh really? Yeah Pre or post hand job Hayley was on the The end of year Christmas

I'm real Yeah Isn't that that bitch from the radio Like the lucky shopper It's the lucky soker Yeah Yeah Yeah

Reincarnation bird Will be a bird Fly wherever Ness wherever Chirp at the sunrise And shit onto kids That's perfect life Craig is next

He's in Singapore OG listener from when Fletch Had Hair and Vaughn pretended to farm full-time Wow I don't even think I had to hear then Yeah Merry Christmas From the sweetiest place on earth

Singapore I love Singapore Sproul loves Singapore No you love Hong Kong Hayley loves Hong Kong Sproul loves Singapore Here's the Lady Diah for keeping the class Vaughn for keeping the chaos

And Fletch for keeping receipts on everyone else Cheers to Hayley for keeping the boys in line And your honest and transparent self I don't know that I keep the boys in line No. May the show secret Deliver me a cocktail strong enough to survive another Tropical Christmas away from New Zealand pies and Pav.

Yeah. Thanks to you guys for the laughs and the vibes love the dulcet tones in my ears every day. And extremely strong Kiwi accents keep me grounded. Enjoy a well-deserved break. Should we give him some Dulcite Kiwi accents? Oh, hi, Craig. We miss you, hope you've in a good time in Singapore.

Do you need anything sent over, Craig? Would you like some watercars? Chalklands? Yeah, should we send you some watercok? Do you want a peck of weight, and some tum-team. M-Tam. Making it through another...

Do you want us to send you a packet of Tim Tams? Nga. How long as you're making it through another year abroad without accidentally calling someone mate in a business meeting. They're still managing to stream the Christmas cocktail special from Singapore without the Wi-Fi dropping during Haley's laughing fit of the year or Fletcher Revelling the Show's Secret. What's that last year?

Yeah. I know. Oh, last year's podcast. It's a bit of a blur, to be honest. Listening to the top six reasons, a woman, outlived men and having it hit it a little too close to home, also learning more from Vaughn's pork nugget segment than I ever did from a university. I made a chicken nugget, but with pork.

That's right. It was delicious. You also made a banana chutney this year. Banana chutney, yes, and cooked an ox's tongue. You did. That was all good. Lovely. It's a year of culinary exploration.

And it all ends in pegging. Lady dies cocktail shaker would be my reincarnation choice. Front row seat to the chaos. I was shaken daily, but never stood. Alternatively, Fletcher's cat, because it seems like the only creature that gets more attention than the secret itself and boy.

I did just have to pause before we recorded this podcast to put a towel on the bed because he loves sleeping on a towel. He's curing up and I look at it. Yeah, he loves it. He loves it. You always got to put down a towel.

Always put down a towel. When you got pussy over. Sorry. Sorry, I'm sorry. He doesn't make a mess. He just likes the fabric. Just wash the sheets. He's all right.

He's just staring at me though. Yeah, it is disconcerting. It's weird. I'll go to sleep zone, don't worry. Gina's from all over the place, but she would like a Christmas podcast shout out. It's been a really tough two years. Oh. After two really tough years.

Okay, fuck. Sort it out. Oh, I haven't drunk much. Sorry, Gina. I said, fuck it. Quit my job and packed up my life and now I'm a full-time solo backpacking around the world. I love that. I met someone this year who threw in their entire job, life and relationship and moved overseas.

Do you remember? Yes, go to Haley's comedy show next year Well, you'll find out the rest of that story Jesus You know an old mate for the UK Who let me saw the Oh Because so and so told him to do so

Yeah Stay tuned Stay tuned The Bali secrets will come out Demon Spotter Um Hello the year is all the random And amazing places I've been to

Not your typical tourist destinations Uzbekistan was amazing Yes I want to go to the Starns I've had a friend that's done a couple of them and they look inside. And David Barry went to one of them on that documentary, The Dark Tourist.

Yes, yeah. And he went to, what's the one with the giant firehole? Is that? Turkmenistan or Tazakistan or... Well, they call it the gateway. Yeah. The gateway to hell. Yeah.

Is that the one with the nuts leader? Yeah, and all the bizarre, like, statues and, yeah, yeah, looks amazing. And any of people do you think go to Kazakhstan and sing, Kazakhstan is the greatest country of them all? Uzbekistan was seriously incredible Also standing on the top of Norway After getting there all on my own Was a really proud moment

There's honestly so much I should write a book You should do it You should do it Not your usual typical juicy goss But being able to do the solo backpacking On my own I might not be able to get a text back from a man

But I can get myself all the way around the world And do all these cool things on my own I love when people do the solo thing Especially females Like it is you know It's so scary It's so scary Obviously a cat for reincarnation

I'll lie in the sun all day sleeping. Cats again winning. We're all over living, eh? Do you know what I mean? Like no one wants to sort of get out and do anything but it wants to be going to lay around. Axvin? Axvin.

That's an actual name. A-X-V-I-N from Orton. Do you reckon it they meant to write Alvin? No, this is a, this is a... A woman, we believe. Yeah, pre-go. Okay. X-V-V-E-N-E, so it's okay, we've checked that.

Is it, Frank? What's the origins of the name, Axeman? Do you know? Oh, sorry, I thought you were Googling it. Oh, Google. I'll Google it. I'll Google it. The origins. Name origin. Axvin, or more common as the, known as Ashwin, is an Indian Sanskrit origin. It has multiple meanings primarily related to horse tamer or possessed of horses.

Are we saying a wrong? Is it Ashvin? Referring to the divine twin horseman Ashvins in Hindu mythology, it also means light and associated with the first start or pair at dawn. Okay. Ashfin. Okay, love it. A-X-V-I-N, otherwise known as Ashwhip. one. Merry Christmas to the team. Hope the next year in 2026 will be a better

year. Ha ha. I also want to tell my husband how very proud I am that he took the challenge in career change in getting up every morning, giving his best to improve and thrive in the new job. He will always have my full support. A lot of people saying that love is alive in our shout-out so far.

Well, you've done a Ui. You've done a Ui. You've done a Ui. I haven't done a Ui. I just, every now and then I crank the handbrake and I spin around a bit. Yeah, let's see. Sort of a drift. It's a drift course. And I Tokyo drift. Yeah, Tokyo drifted, as you'll want to do.

Highland of the year is definitely our two weeks in Europe, seeing the iconic monuments like the Eiffel Tower, Notre Dame, Coliseum, Palatine Hill in person was such a special experience. Another special moment I need to mention is finding out our best friends who have been trying to conceive for years, finally got pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Oh, my friends did that too this year.

So lovely. I would want to come... Not for me. Not for them. It's a bit lovely for them if you want it. I want to come back as a dog so that I can talk to my dog and understand what he's thinking. First thing I'll ask him is how he knows when it's the weekday or the weekend. On the weekday, my husband and I got up and get ready to work and he'll just ignore us and continue sleeping.

But on weekends, he'll be extra excited when we get ready because he anticipates that he'll be coming out with us. But I just don't understand. It's a calendar. It's all smell. I was going to say, because what if you came back as a cat or a dog and then you tried to talk to them and you realize you can't? No. You communicate in different ways. Because dogs, it's all smell, right?

Like licking the butthole. What does a weekend smell like? Well, I'm just thinking maybe they do something different. And it's related to a smell. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't do eggs during the wig. Because that's how they know, that's how they know to get excited that you're almost home, right? Because the smell of you is fading.

Oh. Isn't that why dogs, they kind of get excited because it's when it's time. Because they're like, the smell's fading. And when the smells this faded is when they usually come home. Oh. So they're very clever with their smell dogs. Anyway.