ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Christmas Cocktail Special '25- Episode Six

Episode Date: December 24, 2025

On Episode Six; If trees had eyes, where would they be..?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Fleshworn and Haley's Christmas Cocktail Special Welcome to the Christmas Cocktail Special Our live show and Big Potters back on Monday the 19th of January We're still going on our Aparole Sprits It's only the second one, we're going slow Is this why you wore your t-shirt today off my tits on Aparole Sprits? Lovely Who did I? I went to a cafe recently and the guy said

It's a cafe go to all the time And the guy I was wearing this t-shirt He goes, I love that And he put it just at his hand towards the logo. And you thought finally he stood there. And then I could see him being like

and he was like oh fuck sorry I don't mean I don't know I just think I was like dude there's writing on my top it's fine you can read that yeah get it

yeah then we fucked in the bathroom I was gonna say yeah and then you're like oh it's okay and he's like it's actually morrowing your tits

and you know it's all good Amanda from Arangiora never been there but here it's nice come back we miss you Haley your birthplace

yeah thanks for another year of laughs I love how it feels like I'm pervertedly listened to the conversation of genuine friends. I appreciate you all. Producer girl is included and can't wait for another year of ridiculous banter. Wait, wait, to you hear the real conversations we have? Highlight of the year.

Well, one day when I turn your mics on accidentally, you will. He's scary sometimes, isn't he? Getting to work with some of my best friends and the inappropriate stories we probably shouldn't be sharing it to workplaces, my highlight of the year. Yeah, same. Juiciest moment of the year. I got back into dating after a hiatus of a few years, and let's just say I'm making up for lost time and trying things I haven't tried.

Stuff, we love that. It's the year of it. I love that, relating. Eating it. Eat it. Look at it. Spitting on it. Vorn.

Choking it. Choking it. I'm sorry. Forne. Choken it. Everybody, sorry. Calm down. Censorship bell.

Put your tongue in it. Sorry, I spit on my mic. Reincarnation choice. I think I'd be a cat because I could laser around all day with no expectations put upon me. I'm also going to get cuddles and pets whenever I wanted and they just tell everyone to fuck off when I want to be alone. Yes, great. I say we're long to just laser around do nothing. It's been the common theme of the reincarnation.

It's not good for you. You're not good for you. Get up to mow the lawns. Yeah, get up and do something. You're lice to live or not fucking wasting away under a tree. I ran from Pockekohe. Whenever I hear the name, Aririn. You just think Aririn.

Or Irene from home and away. Or Irene. Or rain. You've got to get out there. Come on. Come on. Irene says Mary, Christmas. Merry Christmas for each morning. Haley and the listeners.

How, how everyone. I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas and a New Year's celebration. I absolutely love listening to the podcast, a little bit of pod, big pod, and sex dot life. Having the podcast playing in my ears are making me laugh out loud, said me many times from boredom while playing with my children. Sorry, kids, you just shit, and mum gets bored of you. Mum's listening to Sex, not like. They are boring, though, aren't they kids?

And from overstimulation when they're being too noisy, we have three young boys under five. Oh, God, how do you do it? I don't know how my parents are. parents did two boys. Even your parents, yeah. Two boys and a girl. Two boys and a girl. It's crazy.

My brother was born when my sister was born and I was two. You were lucky you have two girls. That's it. Because they wouldn't fight much, eh? A little bit, but not, not. Not huge. But then also, they've been shown a different way of conflict resolutions been shown to them differently.

Right. Whereas my dad just beat us relentlessly. And they wondered why we beat each other and yelled at each other. Yeah. We live and we learn. We're growing. Yeah. We're breaking the cycle here.

Highlight of the year. I think the highlight was seeing my five-year-old thrive at school. He has some speech challenges and he's exceeded expectations at school and is doing amazing. Love it. That's cool. Also, see my boys grow up and their personality shine. Ooh, yeah, gooey, boring mum stuff. It makes you happy orine.

Yeah, Oren, you enjoy that. I do love a bit of mum gossip and I help run our local play centre. My gosh, there's some drama sometimes. It gets out of hand how adults can behave so badly when they're supposed to be working together for their children. Yeah. A reincarnation choice, it might be a bit random, but I think I'd like to be a tree growing in a families yeah the kind of tree their family have picnics under and maybe hang a swung in in the children climb it'll be magical to watch a family grow member my tree could provide a fruit

or some sort yeah that's I'd be looking I've been looking down though like hey god I can see down your shirt oh wait so you're imagining the tree's eyes are up in the tree I imagine the tree's eyes are at the base of the tree oh no no no I thought it was like I'm in the leaves oh you're in the leafy trees right we could actually get a drawing up online where do you imagine a tree sees from well if you think about humanised trees it's the trunk and then a hole and it would be its mouth. Yes. You know.

But you're imagining sort of the branches of the arms. And the trunk's sort of like the leg situation. And also Haley went straight to a pervert tree. I'll just point that out. Surprised as no one. Camille message is in from Denver. I'm imagining Colorado. I hope the squad's having a wonderful holiday season.

Very jealous that you were all in summer currently. That would tell me she is indeed in Denver Colorado. Yes, yes. In the midst of winter at the start. I'd love to go. Have you been there? No, you went to, where did you go, Whistler? Whistler.

Yeah. I don't know what she was just gorgeous. It's good to go again. This was a truly rough year. I would have to say the highlight was putting myself first and moving out after living with my partner for three years. We're still together but not living with each other and it's been great for me in our relationship.

Wow, that's modern, isn't it? How interesting. Consciously sort of going on in my own space. It's all together. That's lovely. Juiciest moment was me watching my shitty supervisor get fired. And my reincarnation choice would be an Irish wolfhound. There's your first dog.

Oh yeah, that's our first dog. What does an Irish wolfhound look like? Big, big. Why, what? Oh, because someone was a Labrador, weren't they? Yeah, second. Irish, a little bit of a little... A massive, long-legged.

Wolfhound, New Zealand. Scragley. Oh, Scragley, yes. Oh, me little doggy. I saw one of those yesterday. Nothing little about them. Treadly do. Ruff, rough, ruff.

Okay. Next, let's go to Melbourne. Daryl says, Keota. Fletcher and Hale, a long-time podcast. Listen, the first-time cocktail, special messenger. I'm a female, Darrell. Oh, female. Do you call a female?

Darryl Dazzar? Yeah, probably in Australia You still would, eh? I need a female Daryl. No, neither. Daryl Hannah? I met Daryl Hannah. Yeah.

Actress. Hannah from Splash and other 80s. I didn't made her back. Shows. It's jarring here in my name on the pod so regularly because we always say

Dazzer or Daryl and we're kind of amazing a lad. I hope 2026 is a bit of year for you all. You guys are always my number one listen to a podcast and bring a little slice of New Zealand to my Kiwi heart. Your chats remind me of the chats

I have with my ADHD. Friends. Again, they can't diagnose you, they can't catch you. Random tangents, five side conversations and a lot of fun. My holiday to Vietnam's in five days, so they'll hopefully be my highlight doing this now because I'll forget to do it before the deadline and after my holiday. A reincarnation choice, a cat, I love cats, and as a cat owner, I just think they've got the best lives. Also, cats are autistic and not mine.

Cats are autistic, huh? Yeah, they've got a lot of the traits. They love trains. Yeah. Let's get real fixated on. something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, look at your cat. Your cat is definitely autistic. No, he's not. Yes. Look at him. Hello. Actually, phenomenal eye contact. Yeah, actually.

Beautiful eyes. It's because rescue cats have those lovely deep eyes. Because they're so grateful from being rescued from the hell that face them otherwise. Yes. Alyssa from Ontario, Canada. A few

from the North American continent. continent here. Merry Christmas to the tree that keeps me going across the world and may 2025 die in a fiery painful death. Absolutely. I might shoot it in the back of its head. Jesus, reincarnation, a wealthy couple's house cat so I can sleep all day, not pay rent and get fed whenever I turn it into an asshole. Nice. Oh yeah, lovely. Nice. And sweet. Isabella is from Adelaide and she said, may your pav be fluffy, your hand be juicy and your relatives know when to. Fuck off. Yeah, I'm hosting this year. You added the fuck off. I added fuck off. Yeah. Highlight of the year, the highlight of my

year will be December 24th when my fiance and I'll get married if I could read this out. Okay, wait a second. On Christmas Eve. You cannot ask people to go to your wedding on Christmas Eve. Well, our friend Maddie did New Year's. Oh, wait. Oh, no, you're right. I thought she was getting proposed on Christmas Eve. No. Read the fuck. Married. Married. Getting married.

I guess if you were just doing a small family only wedding and maybe you asked your friends if it was okay, that would be cool. Oh, she's requesting we play this one on the 24th. That's not how it works. That's not how it works. Hold on. We're in order. We're in order.

We don't know where we're at. Nice. Sex. 20, 21, 22, 23, 24. It might actually be close. Mine actually be close. Might actually be close. You could listen to this the next day.

Hung over in bed. Yeah. Down on the floor. So many juicy moments this year with my very sexy fiancé, a big strong masculine. Honestly, if Bunning's sold him, there'd be a light out of the door and a snag stand next to him. All right.

Okay, we're going to see a photo. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, sorry, send a photo next time. For our honeymoon, we're heading to Nepal to go treking for snow leopards. Oh, fuck off. You're not going to see one, though. I don't know. I went to the Wellington Zoo, second mention of the Wellington Zoo and the Christmas

podcast Christmas Special Shadows. That's exactly. It was like one of those internet posts, you know, when it's like, can you spot the snow leopard? Oh, and we stood there for like minutes. They have a snow leopard. They do. At Wellington Zoo, they're snow leopard. Yeah, they've got a snow leopard.

There's no snow. There's this rocky, big rocky mountain. And I'm just, we're standing in with our friends looking for like five minutes. Walk away, like fucking great camouflage snow leopard. Tip of the hat, can't see you. You win. And then ran into the lady from the zoo. Anya, who I mentioned before.

And she said, oh, not sleeping on the roof of the where you look out. You look out. Oh, it's above you. Yeah, and the sun. Like classic fucking cat, eh? But also the best camouflage there is. Yeah, like, were you... Just not being where people are...

Not in your eye line. Yeah. Yeah. I can't wait for my husband. So, you're in Nepal to see snow leopards. Nothing says newlyweds like altitude sickness. Shows of the warm bucket of water and big cats that you may or may not see and may or may not want to eat you. I didn't know that Nepal had big cats that want to eat you.

Yeah, but they're very, very, very, very, very rare. Right. Very rare. Have fun. And also seen us a photo of your husband. Wasn't captured on film... The Hindenburg. Huh?

What? I thought it wasn't catching on film until like the 90s or something. Like it was talked about but no one had a photo or a video of it. The snow leopard. That's what I think. No, that can't be right. You can't just say sentences. New Google, when was that?

When was the snow leopard first photographed or film? Okay. When was the snow leopard? Whenever I write out the word leopard, I have to say leopard. The first photographs of snow leopards were taken in the wild of 1971 in National Geographic. Wait, keep going. The first video footage. was Planet Earth BBC 2004.

Shit. He's flipping the bird to us. Staying up. Haters. You said like last year. I said the 90s and I think that was... The Moscow Zoo exhibited the first captive snow leopard in 1872. God, they're beautiful.

Aren't they look at that? Look at the baby one! Oh! I want it! Dear listener, Google baby snow leopard and you will want to just be... I don't think they should be in zoos. jealous, Murray. He's like... You ugly plain cuck.

Hey. Sorry. I really apologize. I'm in his house. I'm in his house. You are in his house. I just dropped paper into my apparel spritz. God damn it. If Isabella could be reincred, our reincarnated is anything, it would be Marmite, her cat. She's the unspited queen of the house. Take zero crap, lives rent free. This winter we spent $2,000 on a

power to keep her toasted during the first chilly Adelaide winter after home from Brisbane. No, I'm sorry. Get her a sweater. No, there's no cost it. Get her a little head. Get her a little plate. Hit the music. We're going to be back next. We're going to Scotland. Straight up the bug peeps. Billy Connolly.