ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Christmas Cocktail Special '25- Episode Twenty-Six

Episode Date: January 13, 2026

On Episode Twenty-Six; What do you get when you cross a Pavlova and a dog?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Flash Morning Haley's Christmas Cocktail Special Welcome to the Christmas Cocktail Special Our live show and Big Podcasts is back After our holiday break on Monday the 19th of January January We're going to have such nice tans Yes Being at the beach

Let's go to Toronto Toronto To meet Veronica I wanted to shout out my cousin Madeline who I What He's just in my gym top Yum, you think of I'm exclusively wearing your clothes.

Your grey sweatshaw. Yeah, I'm exclusively wearing Fletcher's clothes. It's hot and I was wearing a boxy, heavy cotton tea. Yeah, terrible. That's a winter tea. That's got to be retired for next year. And jeans. Terrible idea.

I wanted to shout out my cousin Madeline, who I introduced to the podcast a few months ago. We listened regularly and love catching up over our favorite segments, especially $10 suburb. Now, she's in Toronto, Canada. She's got no idea about these suburbs. She got no idea what's going on. She buys into it because of the primates into it because of the primary.

connection that we form with our listeners. Yeah, no, Hon, we wanted to keep playing, but you ran out of fucking money, so what do you want to do? Haley, we're waiting for you to tour Canada. Heck, we might even come to the States to see. You're wishing all the best of Canada. Now, that to me sounds like an IRD tax write-off. A little work trap.

Yeah. Yeah. Can you like get tax back for flights? Yeah, shit, yeah. I got to cash out your taxes before you leave, because you're not going to be able to claim GST on anything. Nah, no. I also have this, like, pesky radio job that I have to be at.

It gets in the way. It gets in the way. Although if you're in Canada, you're ahead of the game. Yeah. So you'd be like waking up at a more normal hour. Yeah, maybe. I shall consider it. Highlighted the year for Veronica.

Just like Vaughn has said 2025 has been a shit year. So I hope really the best is coming soon. Veronica and Vaughn teamed up on that one. Reincarnation choice, a dog. Who wouldn't? Well, Fletch and Haley, they're probably checking cats, but I choose dogs. Cats still winning. Devin from Perth.

Devin dogs are so aware of how much they stay. think? Well, not all dogs, don't. They do. Sometimes their paws smell like corn chips. I don't think you should be sniffing that close, man. I would sniff their paws. Yeah, little paws of sniff.

Devin and Perth said you guys are a big part of my week. I've managed to convince some people to work to listen to your podcast. Thank you, so much. Thank you. Do the work. Conversion. Yes, spread the word. We call that conversion therapy.

It's arster eyes. Ask to eyes. No, ar to ears. Ears to mouth. It's ass to mouth. It's to mouth. As to mouth. ass to mouth

eyes eyes to ass to ass to mouth I wouldn't go ass to mouth I wouldn't go ass to mouth I wouldn't go back to mouth I wouldn't go ass to eyes That's how you got barley belly And that's how you get pink eye Yeah I well not for me Which you've had both of this year

I haven't had pink eye this year Yes you have Shannon's You have On my staff I got staff on my eye Yeah you got pink eye You had conjunctivitis You had conjunctivitis

You did get contum We don't run out And we're cool And the main cause of literally everything you've had this week is when you're run down and not taking care of yourself. Yeah. Like, literally. You gave me your little looby, your eye lube.

Yeah, I did. I forgot I had conductivitis this year. Yeah. I have been manking this year. You've been quite disgusting this year. Yeah. And we've put up with it. Yeah.

So, you are gross. It's manky, yeah. It's ming. Imagine how much you, you know, how much action you get if you're actually like. Cleaned up. If you, like, showered and slept, yeah. Highlight of the year was meeting some mates from. New Zealand to watch the world's super bikes in Phillip Island.

I'm sorry, you'd say on Phillip Island. In Phillip Island. That's our at Phillip Island. I'd say I'm on an island, I'm in a city. I'm going to watch the thing on Phillip Island. They're not racing in the centre of the island. You'd be underground. That's just stupid.

Wow. You've got him so aggressive about that. If you can just please say that properly. Reincarnation choice, a human 50 years ago. I wonder why they wouldn't be a human 50 years ago. Interesting. 50 years ago. You'd know all the lotto numbers.

I know, you're never going to remember all the lot of numbers You'd write them down before you could book and talk them. But then you're going to wait 50 fucking years. And I reckon they might click on when you start winning every week. Yeah, but what are they going to do about it? That would be a great gift. If we had every lot of numbers ever went and you would take it to people and you'd be like, I like you here.

Those are the lot of numbers this week. Yeah, and that's the movie, a TV show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was, it was 50 years ago was, 1975. Jesus. No, it wasn't. Fuck you.

It is embarrassing I had to Google. No. Excuse you, Jessica. I've had more drinks than you. 50 years ago it was 1950. In our souls, it was 1950.

Oh, no, but it's not, though. It was 1975. Yeah, yeah. Can't be right. I just love looking up, how was 1975 for women? Not bad. Because a lot of time people are like,

I love to be in the 50s. And you like, would you? A lot of whistling and show us your tips. No, but the BGs. From building sites, I reckon. As we're about to have the BGs, and you know, the girls and the gays love the BGis. Huge continued impact of the second-wave feminist movement.

Yeah, there you go, your bra burnings and such. Icelandic women strikes, second-way feminism. Abbot and heaps women. Yeah, yeah. High levels of happiness. We're all right. You're doing all right. Next is Hannah from Nelson.

Shout out to my sister, Lauren. We've read Lauren's shout out out. We read Lauren. Lauren's in London. She's living in London at the moment. She's a long-time podcast listener. We'll bond over listen to the episode. She's going to be one of my bridesmaid when she comes back to Napier, New Zealand,

in February next year to marriage with her fiancé, Alice. I'm going to be one of her bridesmaids. That makes sense. Alice, love is not always dead. Thank you for keeping an interesting. She's done a fat Ui. She pulled the handbrage on that. I work as a marine electrician, so the headphones block out any smart remarks from the male-dominated industry.

A marine electrician. Yeah. But is it just lights. Shouldn't have lights under the water or spark-pool lights. Yeah, light switches on. It's just an electrician on a boat, though, isn't it? Really. It's a boat.

It's a boat spark. It's hearing this and be like, you fuck it is. Yeah, it's a boat spark. But it's a male-dominated industry, and she's sick of hearing from you. Yeah, I know. Shut your mouth. Shut your mouth.

I'm looking forward to seeing Haley perform a comedy show in Nelson in November. Sorry, it's probably already been. It has been. It was fantastic. It was phenomenal. Yeah, good. Highlight of the year, buying my house from my ex-partner from over two years ago. Sounds Harry.

Juiciest moment of the year. dressing up as she go and going to a Halloween. No comment on that. We'll see it. You two just. Dressing up as she going to go to a halibane costume with my girlfriend who's dress as can possible. Fantasies do come true.

That would have been. Fletch and I had a great idea for a Halloween costume this year. Say it. No, we're going to do that next year. We'll do it next year and abide by our normal rule at Halloween. No photos. No photos. Our whole entire last Halloween party was no photos and shit.

It was great. It's fantastic. Dr. Shawy. And it's so good being able to trust your friends. that they're not going to leak to the media. Yeah, because they're in equally problematic bloody costumes. Doctors can't be seen in that.

Although our friend Mike does have the security camera from the deck, so we could be fucked one day. Mike's going to fuck you. Always look after Mike. We love Mike. We love Mike. Hannah is coming back as a honey badger

because no one fucks him. Oh, honey badger is a scared. Hey! They called it two pronger. Please do not throw things in the ceiling fan. Kate is next shoes from Clinton. Is this your friend Kate from Clinton? but same place.

Clinton. Down south. Wow. Two lists as in Clinton. Christmas card message. Merry Christmas to you all. May this year, fuck right off. Highlight of the year, my mum's cancer scans coming back, Claire.

Hey, fuck you. And my husband and I surviving two under two and this awful storm that's currently hit and left us without power for six days. Honestly, this year has been anything but highlights, actually. Juiciest moment of the year. You have to have a social life to have juicy moments, don't you? We did find out one of our friends is chatting on her husband.

In a small town? Was her? Have you, do you know about this, Shannon? Oh, the Clinton ghost. So when I was down there, there's nothing there. There's a pub and that's it. Yeah, yeah. It's probably where the cheating happened.

Well, no. So we were there and my best friend was like, oh my goodness, she should not be with him. And then she messaged their little group chat and the town was popping off. And they're like, she's moved on with him. And like he worked at the fire brigade. And it was like, everyone is in everyone's in. Oh, yeah.

I come from a small town, though, do you know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. If he worked in his fire suit. Yeah. What do you want me to do? Do you reckon, would we be Clinton 10s? Babe, we're Clinton 15s?

Oh, we're going to say. I'm in Auckland 7.2. It doubles in Clinton. Okay. Ranglination choice. Someone that gets to sleep, maybe a grizzly bear. I'm a dairy farmer that has two shit sleepers for children. Oh.

Rebecca messages in from Spain. Oh, see my mom. Finish your fucking church. You know how we feel about Sagrada family. We're sick of that. Beautiful, though, isn't it? Very Christmas team. you've ever been my connection to home while I love listening

while on my way to the hospital in the mornings. Oh, she works in a hospital in Spain? Amazing. Also, whereabouts in Spain? We need more info. Yeah. Amazing. Visiting Venice with a friend whilst on a Erasmus exchange in Italy. Erasmus, that was the band.

In the shadows. Oh, oh. In the shadows. On my life. Reincarnation choice of crow because they're smart. shiny things and just don't care. Crow. Yeah, a crow.

Erasmus exchange. I'm just looking up what one of these is because, Jesus, we've got to know. It's a European Union program that allows students, recent graduates and staff to study train and volunteer abroad for a period of time typically in a European country. Oh, yeah, doctors do this as well.

What's the other word for it? When you do a sabbatical. Sports exchange. Is it like that? No, sports. Billet. A bit bit. A bit bit.

Oh, that's cool. That's a good. idea. Victoria, another Scottish. We've got some Scottish listeners. I've been hearing from a lot of them. Three. New Christmas card message to myself. I hope 2026 is better than the last few years have been.

Oh, my. Juiciest moment of there, new man. I've said reincarnation of rock. I think I would quite enjoy the simplicity. Look at that. That's a simple way. That's a simple one from Victoria. Good on you.

Shelley is messaging in from Queensland. What does shells have to say? Shows. Listen to you guys every night. I were trying to go to sleep, but you made me laugh. So then I listen to the whole pod. High out of the air booking a five-week holiday, Europe for the last year of our, for our 25th year wedding anniversary.

It's a long time. Reincarnation would be one of my dogs as they are very spoiled. They are treated like a human and even sleep in a king size beard. Yuck. Let's move on to Zoe. A long time listener. First time podcast, Christmas cocktail shoutouts a requester. I've been listening for years and years.

I love it more since Haley's joyful arrival. Kielda. Lovely. You're normally the first voices are here in the morning and normally manage to start my day. Laughing out later with Fletchhorn and Haley on Z. It's a tagline. It's a tagline. louder.

It worked. It feels like I'm sat in a room listening to my friends. Great work. Please keep it going on. I tend to know more about what is going on in New Zealand than my Kiwi partner and catch them up on all the funny things you do we'll talk about. I have my first summer Christmas this year in New Zealand and looking forward to seeing how it compares to a cozy UK Christmas.

Then off over the pond for New Year's. Can you recommend any Christmas seasonal food to try while I'm over? Christmas seasonal food. So wait, cheese a brat. Coming to New Zealand. Yeah. Right. Or the Pavolova, obviously.

Pavolova. The Pavlova. The Pavlover. I think you've added a syllable. Pavlova's dog. Pavelovian response. Why the way, this is all wasted, she's going to be gone by the time this is. Oh, yeah.

Oh, shit, yeah, this is. We're in January this one. She's long gone. Have a toasty. Like, we've got good toasties around the country. Yeah, good, slutty, toastie. Slarty toasty. P.E. said to me a birthday message last year,

and my boyfriend and a smile and ear. Thank you. Oh, that's lovely. My family from Australia were over last Christmas and New Year, so having all the family together was amazing, especially all my nieces and nieces. So she's Australian living. and... Sounds like it.

Zoe, where the fuck are you from? Zoe, I'm really struggling to catch her. Maybe she's from the UK and her family moved to Australia and she didn't... Oh yeah, true, true. Yeah, that's a lot. Because she would know the Kiwi foods if she was Australian. Nah, no, she's a palm. Okay, yeah, right.

Reincarnation choice would be a horse, find them graceful, elegant and pretty maybe a horse in a new forest so I can roam free in the wildlife. Yeah, first horse says Zoe. Think of those weird hooves and they... I mean, they stink, eh? Guys, let me take you back a few episodes and you'll remember we talked about Tomazina. No, babes, no, let's stop.

We're at 12 minns. Are we? I thought we're doing three pages per. No, no, I think we'll go based on time. Stop. All right, let's stop. Because we're going to go to Smithers Canada. Excellent.

Oh, fuck.