ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Fact of the Day (of the Week!) - Blood Week!

Episode Date: November 30, 2023

On This FOTD(OTW), Vaughan taps into a rich VEIN, and spills the beans on Blood!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Hayley. Hello and welcome to Fact of the Day of the Week. This week, Vaughn has chipped platelets and lays out some bloody facts. It's time for... Fact of the Day, Day, Day, day, day. What was that? I don't know what you'd call that.

It was I started and usually I progressively increased the pitch. You started so low. I've been huffing that. Progressively. Throat spray. Sudafed. Huffing something. Stop it. Today's fact of the day. Yeah, stop it.

Today's Fact of the Day. It's Blood Week. Is it? Well, no, no, it's just Blood Week here at Fact of the Day. Oh, okay. I don't know if it's... I mean, any week's a good week

to give blood if you're eligible if you don't have mad cows. They've been hounding me but I got a tattoo recently so I can't. A couple of other injunctions. You got mad cows too, didn't you?

Yeah, and I got mad cows. You got mad cows. And sleeping with all those gay dudes. And if there's anyone I want to sleep with, it's gay men. Oh, shush. Aaron doesn't know. Shush.

Nobody tell him. Nobody tell him. My hobby is sleeping with homosexuals on weekends. Weird hobby. I bet they're stoked about it. Yeah, they love it. Weird hobby. The weird hobby, today's fact of the day,

is that blood has approximately the same protein amounts as a protein shake. Bruh. Bruh. As a dosed followed protein shake. Bruh. Bruh. Bruh. Does it have all the stuff in it as well, like some green tea extract? Yeah, dude. Yeah, it's got aluminum, globulin. Is there strawberry natural flavoring?

There's no strawberry. That is the one thing that blood will still taste like blood Ew Metal Yeah Metallic Yeah But I didn't know

The protein level of blood Is the same as Like a protein shake Like it's one of the Highest protein carriers Is that why Like when we eat meat Obviously there's a lot of protein

But is that because There's still a lot of blood In meat Or that it's No It's cooked out It's not It's cooked out

Yeah Is that why vampires Are so jacked? Yeah, yeah. That's why vampires are jacked. They're just doing nothing. They're doing full protein. Their farts must smell.

Oh, my God. So keto. So, so keto. But then sometimes you meet a real skinny vampire and all, you know, they're just trying to put on the weight and gain, but they just can't. I know, because they need some carbohydrates, but they're just getting protes, bruh. Yeah. Okay.

You're going to get turned into a vampire. Okay. That's hot for me. Okay. I think I'd look hot. Yeah. But they're just getting Proats bruh Yeah Okay you're You're gonna get turned Into a vampire Okay That's hot for me Okay I think I'd look hot Yeah Cause you wanna live forever right Yeah

Yeah it's you Yeah and I do not wanna die Don't She doesn't wanna die And I wanna be hot Wait do you age No No

As long as you can get A really supply of blood Oh damn it Can we do it 10 years ago That's That's what I'm saying That's what I'm saying You always wanted to be a vampire

And then you finally get your chance But you're And you're like 70s And you're like Now I'm not gonna be stuck I'm saying You always wanted to be a vampire And then you finally get your chance But you're in your like 70s And you're like Now I'm not going to be stuck In my hottest Yeah I mean some people look great at 70

Don't get me wrong But if you look great at 70 You probably look smashing at 35 Yeah yeah So it was 26 your year Okay So 26 is your year That you're getting

Yeah Vampired You now You're looking good now Oh thanks Yeah vampire now Quickly vampire now Is that one of my 16 compliments for the month?

Yeah, that you're the hottest you've ever been. If you were going to get turned into a vampire, now would be the time to do it. That's your compliment because you're looking good. I've got a bad back, though. No, that'll come right because you're a vampire. You're a vampire. Okay, cool.

I don't think they get backs. Wait, it will unslip my spine. Yeah, yeah, it'll re-sponge up the disc. As long as you keep your intake of human blood up. Okay. You're happy with that, are you? Just no questions asked. He's just going to drain humans of blood.

That sounds great. When are you going to vampire? I would have vampired at 36, I reckon. Was that, oh, yeah. That was when I was in my best shape. Marathons, you were running marathons. No, no, it was after that. Oh, was it?

It was after that. Okay. There was a time when I was doing a lot of running and I got a little bit of a lollipop head. Yeah. I've got a big head running and I got a little bit of a lollipop head. I got a big head. When you've got a 64 centimetre circumference head,

you can't get too skinny, too lanky because you look very heavy in the head. You look like a Funko Pop bobble head. Everyone's like

Ozempic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What was before Ozempic? It was the original Ozempic. Yeah. Running too much. Running heaps. Running way too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What was before OZN pick? It was the original OZN pick. Yeah. It's running too much.

Running heaps. Running way too much. But yeah, a 36 for me. So that's a fun game. Fun game you guys can all play at home today. If you were going to get turned into a vampire, what age would you have chosen to be turned into that vampire? So today's fact of the day and the first fact for Blood Week

is that blood has about the same protein per mil as a standard protein shake. Play. ZM's Fletchvorn and Hayley. has about the same protein per mil as a standard protein shake. Your Fact of the Day, please. Well, it's Blood Week here at Fact of the Day and we're learning a lot of things about blood. And I wanted to tell you that there is gold in them there bloods. What? Did you know human blood, the human body contains gold

and it's circulated around in the blood? What? How do we get gold? Is it because of those bougie bakeries with all the gold leaf stuff? The trace elements of gold. They're like, oh, we're going to charge you more even though this tastes like nothing

and it's a bit weird. Human blood contains traces of gold, the total, and the average human body comes to less than 0.2 micrograms of gold. What does that equate to money-wise? I've done the maths. You need to be a serial killer to be making any money.

If we milked every human of all of their gold, I did the maths last night, and apparently current world population, 7.8 billion. Okay. So if we milked every human of their gold, we would get 1.56 tons of gold from every human. It would take a little bit because I'll be the one doing the juicing,

so I won't be able to be juiced. And I thank you all for your donation of your bodies to the Vaughan Smith gold juicing. You know you can self-juice now. You don't even have to go to your doctor. You can go and tell them I'm due a juicing and they just give you a kit to juice yourself. But you'll be, if you juice yourself, you won't,

I hate to tell you this, you're not surviving a full juicing. You're not surviving a full juicing. Unless I hook you up to a machine and I just slowly bleed you, but your body produces more blood. Right, right. And then I'm accumulating all of your blood. Okay. So 1.56 tons.

Why don't you just have little flecks in you, little flecks of gold somewhere? How does it get made? Do you have the answers to these questions? I'll be frustrated if you don't. No, I don't have the answers to these questions. How do you? Why have we got gold in us?

Just bring us a fact of the day and then... You say there's gold in us and not tell us how. Can I sip Hayley's blood and get a little... I've got lovely blood. It would be next to nothing. Per person. I think my blood is a nice colour. Oh, like a nice shade of red. Yeah, if I've

nicked myself or something, I'm always like, wow. Well, it's on the new Rosanne colour chart, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, Hayley's blood. It's part of our co-lab. Yeah, Hayley's blood. Now, was it the blood on the way to the heart or on the way away from the heart? Because, you know, that looks a bit different, doesn't it? One's darker, one's got more red blood cells,

and then they get a bit depleted. Do I have sexy blood? I've seen your blood. It's manky, yeah. Oh, okay. It's a bit, yeah. Pale. It's really pale.

It's a bit, yeah. What's wrong with me? It's so pale. Pale. Yeah, it's like when you go to give blood and you do the little prick on the finger and they test your eye and make sure you can do it and they prick it and a little bit of blood comes out

of Fletcher's finger and they're like yuck. It's got bits in it, like floaty bits. Backwash. It's got bits of chips. Yeah, it's got bits of like chips in here. Imagine if they did have to sieve your blood.

Mr Fletcher, your blood is full of cheese ball crumbs. Mince that through a cheese cloth. Could we, Blake? Could we get a muslin cloth, please? Yeah. Oh, my God. Train this through. His blood's like his water.

It's a bit milky and stuff. Do you know what? That's gross. It's just pale. So this is where I hit the problems because I've just found the price of gold, but it's in the ounces, and I had the- Oh, you need like- So if I go ounce to gram, is that what you want?

Yes, please. Yeah. No, I don't know how to work that. Yeah, go on, go on, go on. How do I turn an ounce to a gram? Yeah. One ounce is 28 grams-ish. So you need to divide your ton by 28.

I think it would be easier to take... Oh, my God. Mathematicians listening are like, wow. 1, 5, 6, 0. 1, 5, 6, 0. KGs to hours. These entertainers are thick. Okay, so 1,560 kilograms is 55,000 ounces.

And I've got the price per ounce. And so I times that by 55027. 461. Dude, if we juiced every human and took the gold from it, current prices would have $181 million, $918 million. We're going to need a large machine. No, $918,720. We couldn't get everybody.

And then when we did, we'd need a big machine. And who's going to be juiced last? Because that would have to be self-juiced because we'd kill the whole population. We wouldn't juice ourselves because we'd get... We'll take three people off that. Yeah, okay. You need a minus us three from that title. Minus three?

Okay. Are you saying our gold is insignificant? What we need to work on is logistics. Someone needs to be driving the tanker of blood to the factory now and then we need to work out who's driving Are you saying our gold Is insignificant What we need to work on Is logistics Someone needs to be Driving the tanker of blood To the factory now And then we need to work out Who's driving the Waste blood out

Once we've taken The gold and the silicon Put it in the river And we need a small Community of procreators Who are replenishing The people we've juiced So we can juice more

And get all the gold Just hordes of people Getting down Yeah Glory of ale Well they could do it They just do it Let's not go there No holds barred more and get all the gold. Just hordes of people getting down. Yeah. Gloria Vale. Well, they could do it. They just do it. Let's not go there.

No holds barred. Well, today's grim fact of the day is that if you juiced every human of their blood, you would have 1,500 kilograms of gold. Play ZM's Fletch Vodden Ailey. Play ZM. Blood Week at Factughan and Hayley Play ZM Blood week, it's fact of the day Oh yeah And today's fact of the day about blood

Is that mosquitoes have a favourite flavour I don't reckon it's me Sour cream and chives I'd be sour cream and chives for sure You'd be ready salted No No he wouldn't Blood type's ready salted

It's really, I think Vaughan would be Ritty Salton. That's actually really me. That's really me. I don't think I've ever said something to you and you've had that amount of hurt in your eyes. I've said some truly awful things to you. We roast each other. And you call your friends blood type's Ritty Salton. He's like, no.

Oh, no, please no. No. Only because you know how much I hate ready salted chips. Do you know what you are? You're a chicken. Oh, yeah, you are a chicken. I am not. You're the hurt in your eyes.

I am not. The hurt in your eyes. I am not. I just wounded his poor little heart. Yeah. You chicken. You chicken flavoured chips. I'm a Doritos double salsa.

You wish you were a Doritos double salsa. I do wish I was a Doritos, but I grabbed the wrong bag. I'm just a plantel stitos. Oh. No, it's you, Hayley Sproul. Oh. Oh. You're O blood type, eh?

Yeah, O posse. I don't know my blood type. Is that a thing I should know? Because I feel like one day I'm going to be on the bottom of a ravine and the rescue helicopter people are going to be like, what's your blood type? And I'm like, I don't know. Well, I can give you my blood because my blood

goes to everyone. I've got the good stuff. Oh, no, I don't. I think I got that wrong. It goes to a lot of people. Yeah, O-Paws. I'm O-Paws. The O's are good. Okay, that's a good one. But you know what? I'm just logging into my blood app. I'm logging into my blood app. I don't have a blood app. I don't have the password.

Oh, yeah. Because you were in London. Yeah, I've got mad cow disease and all those tattoos and those tattoos yeah I've forgotten my password and you know I get drunk and I dabble

yeah you dabble got the things they don't know about me and they still happen to take my blood we'll take it and you're like are you sure

are you really sure what have you been up to so how they found this out was they had mosquitoes in a repurposed fish tank. Okay. Filled with mosquitoes. You've probably seen,

like, whenever there's a, this is how well-oiled mosquito repellent works. Yes. And they put their hand into, like, a repurposed fish tank

littered with mosquitoes. And it makes me feel queasy. Yeah. Knowing that those mosquitoes, so many little mosquitoes' noses are going into arms. Especially, because have you seen the close-up

of when they drill into you? That big snouty drill? It's like... Are you an impact driver or just your regular... It's like a regular... Yuck. So they... But, this is the next thing. The mosquitoes

that were in the repurposed fish tank had had their suckers amputated. So they couldn't even... They ripped their snouts off. They ripped their snouts off. Which even... I've got no time for mosquitoes. I squash them and when they're full of blood,

I'm like, whose blood is that? And sometimes I imagine it must be an animal's blood that's now smeared all over my mirror or window. They had them... they cut off their... Oh, that feels so wrong. Cut off their suckers so they couldn't, but it's still like the mosquitoes were landing. And so they did it on all the different blood types.

And O blood type was the most pop, excuse me, the most popular. You're right. A little bit. Too many chips. Too many charitas. Too many tostitas. Too many chicken bloody chips. So they landed on the O type arms the most

Because I don't get bitten I'll get like one bite a summer Aaron gets eaten I get mauled It's your pale feet though Because I can see the blood through the It's like a landing strip Eat me, eat me

It's like a landing strip Yeah, yeah We'll get those dogs in the sun this summer, hon I got the dogs out at the weekend Yeah Yeah, I have been working on a bit of the sun this summer, hon. I got the dogs out at the weekend. Yeah. Yeah, I have been working on a bit of a dog's tan. Yeah.

They are very white dogs. Yeah, right. Yeah, I'm getting them out there. We love. So today's fact of the day for Blood Week is mosquitoes apparently prefer people with the blood group O. And just a little word because I logged in. O plus is in high demand if you want to donate blood. They need it. O positive if you're like me.

I'm booking in. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and need it. O positive if you're like me. I'm booking in. Blood week at Fact of the Day. We're learning facts about blood. How much blood does your heart pump in a lifetime? Oh, litres? I went down a mathematical rabbit hole. Okay.

I'm going to hit you. I'm going to hit you. With each beat, the average heart pump is 70 milliliters of blood. What about me? Because I've got a low resting heart rate. I've got a low heart rate. Yeah, yours is like, he's basically dead inside. You know, every morning I wake up, my Apple Watch is like,

did you die last night? You're right. Your heart rate was like 30-something. But it still must be pumping more. Mine's more just laid back. Less pumps, bigger pumps. Okay, yeah laid back. Less pumps, bigger pumps. Okay, yeah, maybe. Bigger, heavy pumps.

So it moves. I think I've got big, heavy pumps. You've got big, heavy pumps. Five to seven litres of blood in a minute. So you think of like a milk bottle, a litre milk bottle. Yeah, five to seven of those a minute. That's insane, isn't it? And over the course of a day,

seven and a half thousand litres of blood goes through the heart. No wonder in a movie when they cut the wrong thing in the operating room, it's like a garden hose just everywhere. God, your poor heart's really working hard, isn't it? So then I googled the life expectancy of a New Zealander. The average life expectancy of a New Zealander

is 83.16 years. What if you drink as much wine as Hayley? No, this is the average for a reason. I want to live longer than that, though. Okay. But I don't want to have to try. Well, average just means cruising. Yeah.

Right? So 83.16 years is 30,374 days. Yeah. How much? 30,374 days. That is How much? 30,374 days. That is F all. You have to make the most of every day. That's like not a lot.

What are you doing with your life today? I'm talking to my friends in front of this metal thing. And then what though? Are you making the most of the only days on earth you have? I'm going to go out for lunch. Okay. So then the next stage of my calculations was to time 7,600 litres, which is how much it gets pumped around a day.

Are you sure someone hasn't already worked this out, man? No, it's good that he's doing his own research. They kind of have done that much. Oh, you're doing your own research? I know who I love to do his own research. So 7,600 litres a day times by 30,374 days. Yep.

Over the course of your lifetime, your heart will pump 230,843,844 litres of blood. And you might be thinking, Vaughan, that's a lot. I don't know how to compare to that.

It is over 92 Olympic swimming pools full of blood. Just within yourself. Within yourself. I would have been more impressed if you'd made that a lake in New Zealand. How much water's in Lake Topo? How many cubic metres is that? Oh, God, that's hard.

And then cubic metres of water. Yeah. But then sometimes it's lakes you don't know. They go down real deep. Like Topo. Yeah. That goes down super deep. Real deep. I don't want to know how deep. Like real deep. Like Tupor. That goes down super deep.

Real deep. I don't want to know how deep. Like real deep. I don't want to know. I put it in another way. You could fill up 5,771,096 Suzuki Jimny fuel tanks. With the blood? Do you think it'll run? With your blood.

What about if you're using a supermarket discount? A few cents off a litre. Three cents off a litre. It would just be less money, But it would be the same litre Of course Oh you're dumb Yeah So then I was like

Oh you're dumb You're such a dumb dumb And then I googled Supertankers You know those massive ships Yes That take fuel internationally Yes

So they can carry Over 300 million litres Can they? Yes So you could fill up Two thirds of a supertanker With just the blood Just the blood that you pump.

Just the blood that you pump through your heart. I mean, that's the same blood over and over and over and over again. If you've had any kind of pump, a pool pump, a water pump, any kind of pumps, they don't last long. They wear out. And yet ours will just mostly, some people get pacemakers, but most humans, they will just last your life. Isn't that insane?

How do you get fresh bloods? You make it. Where do you make it? In the blood factory. Your body makes blood. Where? It's inside somewhere. I'm panicking. We don't know where blood comes from. I don't want my stale blood. Is it the same blood I've had the whole time?

It just regenerates. Blood cells are made in the bone marrow. The bone marrow is soft, spongy material in the centre of the bones. It produces about 95% of the body's blood cells. Most of the adult's bone marrow is in the pelvic bones, the breast bone and the bones of the spine. Well, I've got big breasts and quite a wide pelvis. I've got a lot of marrow.

How does it get out of there? A lot of it just comes out. How does it get out of there? How does it get out? It just comes out. I don't know. I'm panicking. A lot of questions.

It's insane. So today's fact of the day is over the course of your lifetime, average lifespan of a New Zealander, 83 years, your heart will pump 230,843,844 litres of blood. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's the final fact of the blood week. Yes. Here at Fact of the Day. No the blood week. Yes. Hair effect of the day.

No menstrual facts. True. Wow, he does hate women, doesn't he? I don't hate them. We bleed constantly. I don't respect them. I mean, it technically should be 50% of the facts, right? Because 50% women.

Yeah. This is about women. Okay. And men? No, it's way more about women and the men fact is only in there for a comparison. I'm just saying perhaps we could have a menstruation week. Well, this is about when menstruation stops. But it's not menopause.

It's pregnancy. Oh. Pregnant women have roughly 50% more blood by week 20 of their pregnancy than they did before conception. Oh, wow. Because you're keeping a human being alive inside of you. It's not the baby. What is that? It's in the woman.

It's in the woman. Where? All around. I mean, you obviously get bigger. The placenta. A lot of blood sits in the placenta. What about those women that think their appendix is burst and they're actually giving birth?

Or people that are nearly having the baby and they barely show. Yeah. Yeah. They've got 50% more blood. They've got 50% more blood. The average woman has roughly 50% more blood by the week 20 of the pregnancy. So that's only halfway through the pregnancy. That's not crazy.

Than they did before conception. Humans on average have five litres of blood. Men have five and a half litres. Women have four and a half litres. Wow. But the average baby has a cup of blood. Men have 5.5 litres. Women have 4.5 litres. Wow. But the average baby has a cup of blood when it's born. Yeah, right. Only a cup.

Only a cup? The average baby only has a cup of blood. Are they dry in there? Then they have to start producing their own. But what's inside of their flesh? Blood. Only a cup. But they're just little tiny things.

They're just so little. It's only a cup. They're all fat. They're all fat and stuff. But they've been plugged into mum's placenta and that placenta has a lot of blood in it. I know. 50% more blood at week 23. They're heavy, eh? They're amazing.

And I held it up to the light and you see all the veins and stuff. Incredible things. We just make that. Yeah, you just make one of those. You just make one. Do you need any one of those blood s things. We just make that. Yeah. You just make one of those. You just make one. Do you need any one of those blood sacs? I'll make one.

Yeah. My body. Done. So yeah, that accounts for a lot of the blood, the placenta. But yeah, the pregnant female body just carries a lot more blood. That is wild. Yeah. And it blew my mind that a baby's born with about a cup of blood.

The average baby's got a cup of blood. Because I thought heaps of it would have been the baby. Yeah. It's not. And it's not. It sits in the placenta and it's just what the body needs to get going. So today's fact of the day is pregnant women have about 50% more blood by halfway through their pregnancy than they did before they were pregnant. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars

because you wanted five stars back? Yes. Let's do that with this pregnant. Hey, remember how you just gave that Uber driver five stars because you wanted five stars back? Yes. Let's do that with this podcast. Oh, yeah. Review it five stars, tell your friends, and we'll do the same for you if you ever need a review for anything. But where are you giving me my five stars? Well, I don't know.

Do you own a restaurant or something? Yes. If you give us five stars on this podcast, tell us where you would like your review, and we'll review. We won't even go. We'll just review your thing. I don't want people to know where my restaurant is.

I'm doing one of those secret restaurants. Oh, I was going to say, because that's exactly the opposite of how restaurants work.