ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Great Kiwi Kettle Off - Grand Final!

Episode Date: October 4, 2023

After a disastrous first attempt, Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley line up their Kettles once again for the Grand Final of 'The Great Kiwi Kettle Off!'See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with MyMackersRewards. Hello there and welcome to the Great Kiwi Kettle Off. Okay, I'm just going to say this before I forget. I said it was 30 amps, 32 amps. It's three channels at 32 amps, so 90-odd amps. We've had to hire a box.

There's a power cord coming in that's thicker than a garden hose. I know. We are not going to blow fuses today. We are ready for the rematch. We tried this last week, but all the fuses popped. So I'm the one to beat, basically, because I've started this whole thing by saying I have a fast kettle

and then I won last week and then we couldn't just let it be. Now, we also have a race day sponsor. Yeah, so Briscoe's heard this, and they sell kettles. You don't need to say this. Jared, I believe we had something made. It's in Showbiz A, because Briscoe said, Tammy herself, the Briscoe's lady, messaged me and said, I hear you're playing with an Anko. Oh, right.

Okay. She wasn't happy with that. Yeah, right. And if I could just have my race day sponsor credit. Vaughn's race day sponsor is Briscoe's. Oh, my God. He's going to sell it in a new kettle. Introduce to you the Sunbeam Kyoto City Collection.

Oh, you can't do this. Out of this box, I'm going to get filled up with water. You have to stick with your shenanigans. That was a factory tuck, too. You've just taken open that factory tuck. I know, factory tuck. Oh, that's nice. Look out for chubby chubby sticks.

Okay, that's nice. Oh, that's nice. That's a nice. You know what? Oh, that's nice. That's nice. Daddy's taking this home for some brownie points after the race. Wow.

That's very good. Even if it doesn't win, that's nice. Look at this. Listen to this. We've got the race. Wow. That's very good. Even if it doesn't win, that's nice. Listen to this. We've got different race day conditions. Yeah. So, okay. So each kettle.

It's not soft open. Mine's soft open. Each kettle on the table has one, exactly one litre of water measured. So Vaughan's going to plug his kettle and we're going to put the one litre in. Now we do have a chance for you to win, thanks to Race Day sponsor, Briscoes. We've got three $500 Briscoes vouchers, which, oh my God, that would be so much fun.

Yeah. You know, go on a sale day. Oh my God. If you go on a sale day, you're getting like $2,000 worth of stuff. Well, I mean, that's... Oh my God, I'm girl-mathing this. You're girl-mathing this. Voucher.

Voucher. Go on a Thursday or a weekend. To win, all you've got to do is text the word kettle, leave a space, and then the name of the person

who you think is going to win this race. It could be Hayley. So we've got Hayley on the Breville. We've got Fletch on the KitchenAid. Now we've got Vaughan

on the brand new straight from the box Sunbeam. Yep. We've got... To be honest, you know, I was the box, Sunbeam. Yep. We've got... To be honest, I was thinking that it would have been good to have the anchor here as well. No, too late. You've made your bed.

I might time this and then just do it later at home. You've accepted big, big sponsor. I have accepted. Well, you know, I'm just... Someone just called you a sellout. They called you an absolute Dan Carter. I'm just trying to get the company afloat, you know? We've got you, Dan Carter.

I'm just trying to get the company afloat over here. Don't worry about it. Hang on, we've got to finish the other three. We've got Jared on the Canbrook. We've got Shannon on the second hand. Morphe Richards, Tony Streets hand me down. Which apparently you get

in Australia. It's a big posh brand in Australia. Super grunty. They grunted last time. And we've got producer Carwin on a zip. We've got a good spread of brands here. Yeah, we do, don't we? Yeah. Oh, everyone's texting.

Yeah, everyone's in for Hayley. Also, H-A-Y-L-E-Y. It's all good. Oh, yeah, people have been defending you with the A- H-A-Y-L-E-Y. It's not bad. It's fine. It's fine.

I'm happy. Okay, get your texts in with who you think's going to win to 9696. We're going to come back next and we're going to turn all the kettles on. Finally, put this to bed. We're going to have to have a lot of fingers on a lot of switches. Yes, we'll go 3, 2, 1, we'll engage kettles.

And then we wait. So we'll get the race underway next. We did it last week. We blew fuses. We've hired a Big bloody Industrial sized Construction Power In and outlet

We've got six kettles All different brands Three producers With their fingers Poised to flick And this is all Because Hayley says I've got the fastest kettle

Yeah and we did The test and I did Who's got the sexiest kettle? Come on Vaughn's come in With this brand new Sunbeam from Briscoe's. I'll tell you what, it is beautiful.

Look at mine. Yeah, thank you. Yeah, I like Fletcher's. Yeah, thank you. Only because it reminds me of R2-D2. Yeah, but if in the context of my kitchen, the blue kettle, I mean, it's fantastic. It goes with the cupboards and the green.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, Jared's black kettle goes with everything. Sleek. Carwin's reminds me of Nan's. Yeah, my mum had all red stuff for a while Yeah, and Shannon got hers off Tony Street Well, that woman knows interior design And I'm terrified to say a word against her

Alright, so I think we'll go 3, 2, 1, click On tempo On 3, 2, 1, click Not yet, not yet One litre of water And each all came out of the same tap. Yes. Simultaneously.

So as close to the same temperature as we can get. Yeah. All one litre. Yeah. All running off the same power. Yeah. Now, any update from the electricians? Just before we press...

They're happy. They're happy for us to proceed. The amps and the wattage and everything. Okay. 90 amps through three phase or whatever we should be able to do. Okay, the great Kiwi Kettle-Off to settle this once and for all. Whose kettle is the fastest? Turn on the kettles, producers, and three, two, one, click.

Okay, silence. Wow, there's silence before the studio as everybody just wants to, everybody literally looked at their own kettle and, oh, my God, it's on. Okay, it. Wow. Silence befalls the studio as everybody just wants to. Everybody literally looked at their own kettle. Oh, my God. It's on. Okay. It's on. It's on.

Now, the zip has a lovely orange on light. Yeah, it does. The next kettle, is there a light there? Yeah, a camera's got a light on the little. It's fancy, though. Where's mine illuminate? Oh, you've got an illuminate. Oh, you've got a ring.

It's set on here on the box. It says illuminate. Oh, we've got boiling already. It said on here on the box it says illuminate. Oh, we've got boiling already. Oh, okay. Now the mic is picking up the loud zip. It's the zip. Okay, Carly. Loud doesn't mean fast.

No, loud doesn't. It might be putting a large drain on the power, but that doesn't mean it's going to be the most effective boiler. Because I was told my Breville is quite a quiet one as well, quiet and fast. Now, my jug has a temperature on the top. What's it saying? 35.

35 degrees. Yeah, we're a third of the way there. Can we cross to the sideline mic for a moment, please? Yeah, that's good stuff. That'll put a baby to sleep. Yeah, that's humming. That's humming. That's white noise.

Oh, I forget we're going to get hot again, aren't we? We got steamed last time. We did get steamed last time. Yeah, the studio got very steamy. Sort of a Swedish sauna situation. Your dark blue, almost black kettle that you claim is the fastest kettle in the world, does it have a light on it? Yeah, it's got a light on the switch.

It's a beautiful, sleek design there from Breville. What's the current temperature? 52 degrees. 52 degrees! That's halfway to boiling. That's fast, actually. That's fast. I don't win this.

I was going to flick off first. I can't see all the switches from my position. I can see one side. You can see the other. Sunbeam coming out. Sunbeam coming out. Sunbeam. Great.

The race day sponsor from Briscoe is coming in hot. It's got a matching toaster. Briscoe, if you would like to send me the matching toaster, I am absolutely open to that. Oh, my God. Come on, Dan Carter. Come on. You're tuning into Dan Carter of the Kenneth Warehouse. Now, to the person who says they're embarrassed to say they're sitting in their car in their driveway

listening to the kettle off while they're going inside, don't be. Don't go anywhere. The current temperature reading, Jared. 69. 69! Okay, we're seconds away. We're seconds away. Okay.

I'd say the most steam is coming from the sunbeam, but this is also the first time it's been boiled, so we might be having some chemical burn-off. Could be some chemical burn-off, a bit of dust. Yeah, could be, could be. Producer Jared, a temperature reading. 80. 80.

Oh, okay. Eyes on the lights, please. Eyes on the lights. Eyes on the lights. We'll start hearing clicks as soon as the race is getting close. We're getting to the boil. We're hearing boiling. I can't see any steam coming out of yours.

Temperature? 87. 87. That's 13 degrees of boiling. Everyone's rumbling. Everyone's rumbling. The most steam seems to be coming from the sunbeam. Could be true to click off any minute.

Wait. Oh, it's boiling. I can see mine boiling on the side. 95. 95. The sunbeam's boiling. The sunbeam's rocking itself. Watch closely.

Watch closely. Everybody's boiling. I can see everything is boiling. It's going to flick itself off. What? What's wrong?

Hayley! Hayley! No, but I hear the sunbeam's hooking itself. We're not done yet. Let's get an action replay. Oh my God. Hambrook's gone. Okay, wait. Mine clicked off first. Mine's get an action replay. Oh, my God.

Pembroke's gone. Okay, wait. Mine clicked off first. Mine is gone. My kettle said it was at 100 degrees. But they all get to 100 until they click off. I feel I'm owed a team apology. The new sunbeam has popped its top.

It's an absolute waste of company money to do this re-tour. Oh, no. Is it even on? Shannon, what happened? I don't know. She's cold. You just clicked it off just then. The Tony Street Toaster kettle was not on?

Did you not switch it on? Yeah, it was on for a bit. Oh, the Tony Street Toaster. I think that's why she gave that to you. Nice. Which one clicked off the first? Producer Jared, can we have a final definite ruling, please? It was mine.

I saw it. So Fletcher's hit 100, but the Breville turned off, and then Fletcher's turned off. Yeah. Where was the sun, babe? Rapturous applause, please. The Breville won. No, but I got to 100. It doesn't matter.

It didn't click off. You're not pouring a cup of tea before it clicks off. Except defeat. The Breville is the fastest jug. I say we do it again with thermometers in every one. Oh, my God. It's not about the temperature. It's when the jug decides it has clicked off.

Okay, okay. I couldn't see the side of the kettles. Who are we awarding the winner of the Great Kiwi Kettle Off? The Breville. The Hayley. Hayley has done it. Hayley has done it. I just want to say thank you so much to everyone.

This was a lot of fun, but at the end I never doubted that the Breville was the fastest. That's why I came in and said, I've got a fast kettle. You challenged me? Accept defeat. Like one second faster than my kettle. Accept defeat. It's faster. I want to hear you say that you accept a feet.

I'm going to pen a letter to KitchenAid saying my water hit 100, but it didn't click off. It doesn't click off. All of them were literally, I could see the water bubbling in all of them. Yours was rocking. To be honest, all. Some of them has popped a top and then ruined it. Apart from the Tony Street hand-me-down kettle,

which it sounds like was the reason she handed it down to Shannon. The sometimes boil. Classic Tony Street blowing out everybody else's candle to make hers shine brighter. I've got to tell you, victory feels very sweet today. Very sweet indeed. Unbelievable. Well, congratulations, Hayley Springer.

I think the ANCO could have won. I'm texting Aaron. Leave that thing here. Tomorrow we'll do the ANCO. We won. Give thing here, tomorrow we'll do the Anko We won You've got a brand new Sunbeam You go home victorious as well Great work guys

10 out of 10 if I say so myself I'll do a 9.6 Is that enough for you to review this podcast with a high rating and then tell all your friends You sound very insincere ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley