ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 12th January 2024

Episode Date: January 11, 2024

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley answer your Listener Questions!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bitter Pod Enjoy a refreshing McCafe iced coffee available only from Macca's Great things are brewing Welcome to A Little Bitter Pod The Big Pod is back on the 15th of January And today, for A Little Bitter Pod Excuse me, I'm telling them a similar You just kind of cough in the middle

I was coughing because I don't think we're coming back No we are, like I've said many times you've got a mortgage No, no, no, as I've said many times I'm keen to come back But I don't know if're coming back. No, we are. Like I've said many times, you've got a mortgage. No, no, no. As I've said many times, I'm keen to come back, but I don't know if I'm going to have it. You may have a right on lawnmower accident that leaves you unable to come back on the 15th of January. We'll be careful.

Well, I don't have any hills. And hills is where you really come asunder on. Yeah, but you could hit a block or something or a rugby ball on the lawn, and that's all it takes. And you're under a bladed, under your lawnmower. Now, we asked you to ask us anything. We're doing a Q&A for this little bit of pod today. And the questions have come in.

Vaughan, you have them in front of you. George Cunningham wants to know, what are your Roman empires? So, you know, like, this was the big thing about, like, men think about the Roman Empire all the time, like, multiple times. Do you know, what, a month or so ago when we raised the question, where do birds go at night? Somebody commented on that video saying, this is my Roman, a girl, she said, this is my Roman Empire. Like, where the fuck do the birds go? Where do they fucking go?

Like, I've been looking up ever since that moment. I've been looking at fucking trees. I cannot get to the bottom of it. I know. I'm looking at trees. I see the birds and I'm like, just tell me. There are not enough nests. Just tell me.

I know. Do you know I saw a seagull nest? You know how you never see a seagull nest? Yeah. What's a seagull nest look like? Do you want to see it? It's made of driftwood. It would be.

It'd be yuck. It'd be sandy, I reckon. I'd definitely have sand in the bottom. It was on top of the shed 10 in the viaduct see how it's in it's nest oh yeah it looks really grassy it looks like mounds of grass

yeah it's taken I just get what they find hair and rock fibres and all sorts of things from down there and it popped up some fishing line popped up on the top of there

I don't know what my Roman I mean I always think about the Roman world I always think about World War 2 World War 2 I think about a lot

because I'm so excited any day now we're getting the new Band of Brothers series oh yeah cool the one about the Air Force yeah with Austin

is that who's in it Austin Butler is that who's in it yeah Elvis Elvis is in it Elvis is in it wow

so what do you think about I think about the 90s I think about the 90s a lot because nostalgia yeah and every time someone's like if you say 10 years ago I assume you mean the 90s a lot Because Nostalgia? Yeah And every time someone's like If you say 10 years ago

I assume you mean the 90s Yes Because that's constantly how I feel Yeah it's 40 years ago Well it's 30 years ago The 1990s I think about a ton Because at the start of it I was a child

Yes And at the end of that decade I was Not an adult but You had pubes didn't you? Far more Finally Did you have pubes in the 90s?

I didn't have pubes in the 90s The 90s are the decades where I got my pubes I got my pubes in the 90s i got my pubes in the 2000s early 2000s that's an interesting that's an interesting way of differentiating when did you get your pubes yeah 1996 did it take ages for your armpit ones my armpits were 2001 and I had a couple of wiry long ones. Yeah, were they the first ones? The first ones? Yeah. Yeah. It took ages to fill out.

It took ages for my voice to drop. Did it? Yeah. The pubes came in quick. The genital pubes came in quick. Quick and quick. But the underarm took a while to fill out. Yeah, patchy.

Yeah. But now there's certainly no problem. And then one day you wake up and you've got a hairy arsehole, you know? A blink of an eye. You're getting dags on your arsehole. And you're like, how did this happen?

Where did you come from? That's probably what I think about the most though. The 90s because I was a child at the start and an adult at the end. And the best music. Phenomenal music. Oh, my God. The best music.

Phenomenal music. Yeah. It changed so much from start to end. Yeah. So good. It was a different time. And so many genres were popular. Like, great for metal, great for pop, great for rock, great for rap.

The most played rock songs on rock radio stations in the 2010s were, the top 10 were from the 90s. And 90s hip hop ruled as well. It changed so were from the 90s. And 90s hip-hop ruled as well. Changed so much from start to end. Yeah. So much from start to end. I think my Roman Empire is Jason Momoa in all seriousness. It's just an infatuation. You might think about what he's up to and such.

Think about him. Think about just everything about him. Yeah. Wow. I'm literally looking at him right now. It doesn't sound... And your screensaver is on your desktop. My screensaver is him.

On my Instagram, he's always there. Yeah. It doesn't sound healthy. It doesn't sound And your screensaver My screensaver is him On my Instagram He's always there Yeah It doesn't sound healthy It doesn't sound healthy I don't care Next question Chris Williams says

What's your favourite International travel destinations? Ooh Thailand Yeah Thailand is great I love I mean I love Europe But god

Thailand is a fun time Yeah Thailand's pretty great Flying to Bangkok And then go to an island. Yeah. Come back to Bangkok and go home. I love it. I would say the Central Americas. Because you've got everything.

You've got like Caribbean islands. That's where you are right now. That's where I am right now. Yeah. You've got Caribbean islands. Can I say thank you for taking time out of your holiday to record the podcast? Oh, thank you. It's been kind of annoying every day to stomp down and find a studio.

Yeah. Currently in a Guatemalan studio. I can hear it. Oh, thank you. It's been kind of annoying every day to stomp down and find a studio. Yeah. Currently in a Guatemalan studio. I can hear it. You can hear it. Yeah. Can you? I can hear Guatemala. Robata FM.

Yes, it's Dr. Robata FM. Dr. Robata FM. Beautiful. But you've got places with your Mayan ruins and temples. Old and new. Old and new, yeah.

Those guys are fucking idiots, though, weren't they? Why? Well, they told us all 2012 was going to be the end of the year and new. Old and new, yeah. Those guys are fucking idiots, though, aren't they? Why? Well, they told us all 2012 was going to be the end of the year, and here we are, like, 12 years later. But I just think that's when the calendar runs. You've got to stop doing things at some point, don't you? Yeah.

Yeah. Like, if you were doing a calendar, you'd only do the next 50 years and then stop. Oh, there'd be no point. Yeah. You know, I'd be lucky to live that. Well, now you would, because the end is nigh. Yes. But you'd go Thailand.

Where in Thailand? I I Koh Lanta Is one of my favourite Islands You fly into Krabi

From like Bangkok Which is beautiful Or Phuket Or whatever Don't go to Phuket No don't go to Phuket And then you go from Krabi You get

You can drive And get on a ferry To Koh Lanta Rules Koh Tao's beautiful Koh Tao's amazing. My mum loves Thailand. Koh Phi Phi's done.

Koh Phi Phi? Oh, I like Koh Phi Phi. Nah, Phi Phi Island, I really like that. Yeah. Koh Samui and Koh Pen Yang are pretty good. But Koh Phi Phi got ruined by tourists because it was the beach. And then everyone went there and left their trash. And then they had to close it for ages to do it up.

But I'd just go anywhere. Cheap food, cheap rubs, friendly people. They had to close it for ages because it got washed away because it was literally a foot above the sea level. Yeah. Yeah, it's gone. Sadly. Chris wants to know, best drinking games also. Not a huge drinking games guy anymore, Chris.

No, back in the day it was Circle of Death. I don't mind beer pong. Yeah, beer pong has just a bit of a sport to it. I like playing games While I'm drinking But not necessarily Have them linked to the drinking I just like conversation

With all my friends In a circle you know Have you done Fuck you Have you done Played the loyal game That every time he sings Call me loyal

You gotta take a drink And at the end All he does is just yell Loyal and loyal Over and over again Loyal Loyal It'll hit ya

Our international listeners Is a Kiwi song, Loyal by Dave Dobbin. He's a national hero. Sarah has a question. Who's your favorite producer? Oh. On the count of three. One.

Oh, no, I can't. Hang on, let me just really think about it. Three. Dr. Dre. Oh, fuck you. Avoided that. I have a special relationship with all of our producers Right

Why are you sitting on the fence I'm not sitting on the fence but like Jared and I Are the bogan metal heads And we come together about All things metal And rock and roll and emo Yeah Carwin and I I would say are probably

The most similar Carwin's got a devilish sense of humour, and she's also a fashion quainie. Yeah. And Shannon is just a hot mess, and is the cuddler of the group as well. Yeah, she loves to cuddle. See, you can't pick one. It's like saying to a mother, pick your favourite child.

You just can't. Mine's Shannon. Oh, thank you. Oh, my God, really? Because Carwen's a bitch, and Jared's not scared of me anymore. saying to a mother pick your favourite child you just can't mine's Shannon oh my god really because Carwen's a bitch and Jared's not scared of me anymore yeah

your D&D character's dead whoa it's true she's the most eager to please yeah and she's

these other two just bloody you can't just pick the new one you can't yeah she is the most fun because she's new and shiny.

Yeah. Fletch? No, not next question. I'm not picking one. Because then all next year they're going to be like, oh, well, we are not your favourite. Or we should have gone one each and then that would have been all right. Can I pick an old producer?

Can I say Caitlin? Oh, that's what I wanted to say. She's not even here. That's not even. But you're not wrong. Talking about the good old days wrong You're just not wrong You can't beat a classmate Who's that?

Good from you Rusty Raven says what does your work day look like Do you just rock up and talk and then leave It's different for all three of us Be honest It's different for all three of us So I'm always the first to arrive normally I used to be last year.

Yeah. And then I realized I didn't need to be here. You simply don't need to be here. You simply don't, yeah. So I get here around 5 a.m., sometimes before, sometimes just a little bit after. Turn the lights on. Yeah.

It's like, good morning, good morning, studio. Turn all the lights on. Start the generator. Log in, start the generator. Quick photo from the south. Yeah. Before we get there. Quick work wank.

Quick work wank before no one comes. It's a real danger week. Well, no one comes when get there Quick work wank Quick work wank Before no one comes It's a real danger week Well no one comes When you have your work wank I think you should be I go to the locker I open up the locker So Hayley can get her laptop

And I get my coffee out And I close the locker At the end of the day That's cute I'll start with breakfast I'll read the news And then your Shannon arrives Far too much milk

Far too much milk Then Jared arrives Or it depends On what order. Carwen and I usually arrive sort of about the same time. So this morning I tried to get Carwen some money out of Carwen by running in front of her car. No, but I was so tired that I nearly would have. She was fucking speeding.

That's why. You were hooting around that corner because you were a little bit later than usual and I ran in the front. I was like, here's a good opportunity to get some time off work. I don't have any money. Please don't lose my work car park by running over a fellow employee. It's my car park now, bitch. Yeah, is it?

Okay. We turn up and then Fletch and I sit in the studio for about 20 to 30 minutes. I'll eat breakfast. You'll be doing your admin. Yeah. And then sometimes we have a goss.

What time are you getting here nowadays? I used to be five past five and now I'm more 12 to 15 past. Right. Yeah. And then we'll start planning the show without Vaughn because he's fucking useless. You never know when he's going to turn up. Well, Jared arrives sometimes as we get closer to the end of the year

Jared gets later and later as I do as well and sometimes Jared will text saying he'll apologise for being late. Vaughn doesn't. No. But I'm not, mate. He doesn't need to text every day yeah so we'll start planning the show around 530 we've already sent emails

the night before with ideas yeah and then Vaughn will come in and the show is pretty much done the show will be a surprise to Vaughn as he goes yeah which

I that's the way I liked it baby yeah and then we start at six and then we finish on air at nine and then there might be some interviews to record

the next day yeah or like this we're recording this you will always record a little bit of pod straight after the show yeah and then we get to we have meetings there'll be some like meetings scheduled for 11 and then at like quarter to 11 it gets cancelled and you're like fuck like today and then we leave and then i'm pretty sure the producers do fuck all right they just like socialize you guys just like do nothing we're in caitlin to ask how are the people getting this podcast how are the people listening to this podcast because we're gonna leave well it takes me a good hour after the show to do the pod and

then the other pod so it takes you a long time so what you're saying is when people are messaging in the um oh my god leave me Leave me alone. It's coming. He's just got his feet up. He's not rushing at all. He's having his work wank at the end of the day. Oh, yeah, of course. The dude can't even wee in a urinal if someone's in there. He's not going to be able to bust out a wank in a busy toilet during work.

He's not at danger wank level, our Jared. So Jared's doing all the tech stuff for the podcast and often organizing other things. Yeah, Shannon will be doing videos, a lot of editing. Clipping up all our socials. Yeah, captioning stuff. Now on TikTok, we're up at 10 a.m., baby. Yep.

And then Carl will be doing all the big producing stuff. Smoking cigarettes. Smoking ciggies. Putting them out on interns. Having highfalutin lunches and whatnot. Hey, Carl. It's great. Just honestly, so much work behind the scenes.

They do so much amazing work for us they do make us look really good they do fantastic we love you guys oh did they hear that fuck

I'll say it because these boys can't we love you and we appreciate you each and every one of you someone wants something what are these I don't want anything

just cuddles next question and a buddy from a rock concert oh what's our time at what are we time wise because What are we time-wise? Because I know we've got to have pesky ads, don't we? Hey, we love those ads. I love those ads.

That's what I mean. Loving pesky ads. An ad would be great. An ad would be great. Well, funny submission. Here's one I prepared earlier. And more questions for our Q&A. If you were offered knighthoods, would you accept them?

No. 100%. Because you don't need.s, would you accept them? No. 100%. I went to the ceremony. You did. My auntie got a QSM. She's not a dame or a sir. No, no, no. She's just a measly QSM receiver.

You don't need the whole rigmarole. You just book an airfare and you can be a sir or a dame or whatever doctor you want. Yeah, I'm doctor on my flybys. A lord. Anything you want.

I would 100% want it. What an honour. What would it be for services to? Comedy, entertainment. Rate yourself. I'm pretty funny. That's the thing. The minute you accept it,

everyone's going to be like, oh, here we go. Who do you think? She's not that funny. Okay, next question. Funny face. Snap memories. What time does the whole crew each go to bed?

I've been- Different. I really prioritise sleep this year and I've been- You have. You've been thriving. You're radiant. I've been thriving. I've been so radiant.

Yeah, I wanted to ask you where you get your radiance from. That's sleeping more than us. Quarter to eight. Eight o'clock. Dude. That's insane, eh? That's insane. But it's been so good because I wake up at 4.40, my alarm goes off.

If I- So it's about eight and a half, eight hours sleep. I get up the earliest out of the three of us because I live far away, but I arrive before Vaughan. But I go to bed between like nine, and if I'm not asleep by 10, I start to get like, tomorrow's going to be tough. Yeah. So are we going to prioritize that? If I see 9.30 on the clock, I'm not asleep by ten I start to get like tomorrow's going to be tough. Yeah. So are we going to

prioritize that? If I see 9.30 on the clock I'm like uh oh. Damn. And you're not in bed and you're like oh my god I've got to do all my pre-bed stuff.

Get that sorted. So it varies. Yeah. And then it's like you get into bed you're like I would love a little you know

hanky pank but that's really going to push the time back. Right yeah because you're prolifically marathon length lovemaking I know

and nothing gets you're dry yeah yeah until we literally just couldn't possibly a fire could start if there was a light bit of

hay to the area yeah red hot snap says do you guys fart in studio yes porn does

oh you did that one yesterday that was like, like we have been a bit gassy this week. It was ploppy. Yeah. Really? I mean, eating so many cough lozenges. I haven't farted in studio, but I would.

Yeah, you would. Who came up with a silly little pole segment? Asks Gemma. I can't remember. Was it Jared? I feel like Jared's just saying that To get some kudos Probably

And Jared came up with Girl Math as well No I didn't That's got nothing on me I remember you did And then everyone gets in behind And then Jared gets people to make us The jingle And the start for it. Oh, yeah.

I helped with the song. Yeah. But the idea was Carmen and Shannon, I believe. I don't know if it was. There you go. I think it was Caitlin's. She was so good. I don't want to bring it up again.

I don't believe Anna's not getting a mention here, but anyway. Okay, next question. Do we have more questions? Yep. This one is from FletchNZ. He said, Hayley, how much has Fletch been an inspiration on your life and in broadcasting? Wow.

Oh, my God. Was that anonymous? Thank you for your message. Oh, was that anonymous? Yeah, it was actually anonymous from FletchNZ. FletchNZ. Well, in order to one up your little gag question, I'll say it in all earnestness,

very much so. He's an incredible broadcaster. No, fuck you. Fuck you. You've done this. You did this. I literally sit back some mornings and watch the work that he does

and the way that he runs this ship and the way that he just fucking does it so seamlessly and the way that Vaughn and I can arrive tired and you'll know about it whereas Fletch always has energy

and keeps the show afloat that's because he's a shock jock he's incredible and he's just waiting for the right moment to see his next shocking thing such as you don't believe that women

say it should be allowed to absolutely not should be allowed to what say what you said off air I'm not a shock jock and drive I'm just saying we could go. I'm not a drive.

I'm just saying we could go back to the way that Saudi Arabia did it 10 years ago. I told you. There it is. There it is. There it is. He's not tired. He's got a fresh hot take on it. What a shock jock. Wow.

Obviously, I'm joking there. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Hold on. We've got one more question. Rebecca says, are you doing any more live shows? I think that's the plan, isn't it, for the next?

Sure is. Not for free. Not for free. Talk to my agent. Why don't you message our agent? My agent is itching for something to do. Have you got some bed rough going on on you? Look at your T-shirt.

Yeah. Jeez, get some head and shoulders in there. Well, I do. I have been head and shoulders. Are you combing it or something? I guess it was I've been vixing. I've been vixing so heavily before I go to bed. Do you vix vapor up?

Dude, I love vix vapor up. I hate it. What are you, a nanny? I scream. I love it. It's cold. It reminds me so much of my nanny, because the minute you were like,

she'd be like, vix vapor up, man. She'd just cover you from head to toe with vapor. And I think it gets in, and it's just making it a little greasier. Okay, well, maybe shower, please. I've been shampooing at night and then fixed vapor rubbing again. Well, if you're seeing any of our studio videos. That's the least of my body's problems at the moment.

Yeah, me. This cold just gets worse. And, you know, after like three days, you're like, I've turned a corner. This is why you don't go on cruises. They're petri dishes. Oh, yeah, I think I've got three different viruses. Oh, yuck. One to one.

No regrets. As we say, we may be back on the 15th of Jan. Maybe not. We might. You might be looking at patient zero. Oh, no. Don't be that.