ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod -16th July, 2025

Episode Date: July 15, 2025

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; some of you share the secrets you're keeping from your partner...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZM podcast network, it's Fletch, Fawn and Haley's Little Bit of Pod. Welcome to a little bit of pod and our big pod, the live show is back on the 21st of July. Now what entertainment weekly is reporting? Are they reporting something different? Yeah. Well, we asked you to tell us something just between us and the pod. Just between us. Just between us and the pod.

And today we said, what's your secret from your partner? This is and we have got some fuck. I reckon I could drop a few people in it with their partner. Yeah Yeah, good you probably yeah, I reckon I could right well Yeah, one is he doesn't brush his teeth regularly now How the fuck do you tell someone to do that my secret is is I hate it and I want him to start brushing his teeth more That's oh, that's not what it where I thought that was going. Okay. What did you I thought it was? No, I thought people would say different things. Well, there are different things. Okay Yeah

Communication again communications key. Ah Every orgasm I've ever had with him has been fake fucking hell everyone. No Every orgasm I've ever had with him has been fake. Fucking hell! Everyone. No! Oh, no, no, no, because you've got to, you can teach people. Do you just let them hump away for a bit and then you're like, you look and you're like, oh, Shorty's, Shorty's is about to go.

Okay, shit. We could have used a show that more people watch. Yeah. Oh, I really want to see the latest on this Middle Eastern conflict. Yeah, because everything's on demand. Yeah. So, yeah, but fakes it. Yeah, because everything's on demand. Yeah. Yes. So, yeah. Wow.

But fakes it. Yeah, that's an... Yeah. What? You're just kind of wasting time there, aren't you? You've got to have conversations. Yeah. The next one is, I won tickets from you guys to see Dean Lewis live and surprisingly, she

thought I'd paid for them. I've never corrected her. Oh, well. That's fine. That's fine. We don't mind. Absolutely stand by that. Yeah we will. Use us as much as you need.

Absolutely, if you get free flowers, you don't tell them you didn't pay for it. Yeah shit no, nah you're all good. No no no no, unless they like that you got them for free. And then you go, guess what, got these for free. That I'm a better chef than him, that I prefer to eat what I make rather than what he makes. We're both actual chefs. Oh, okay, that would

hurt. Yeah. That's why that would be a secret. Yeah, yeah, you don't want to admit that. No. But if you're bitter, you're bitter. And that's fragile male ego that can't handle that. Yeah. If it's male ego, it's just that you're better at them than they're short. It's just fragile ego. Yeah. All around. Okay. That I no longer have love or any romantic feelings for my partner of nearly five years. You gotta go, life's too short. That's, cause if you have another five years, that's 10 years.

You know what they say about 10 years? It's almost 15. It's half of 20 years. Yeah. Yeah. Half of 20, 38? It's 40. 40? 40s, 40s, twice 20s. If you get to 40 years, you're only four or five years away from the end of the day. They start going faster. Yeah, life's too short, but then people get comfortable and I can see why people just give up.

Yeah, totally. Well, you've taken actually a step by sending us this message. By admitting it. An anonymous admission. Yeah. But sit with it. Next one is, sometimes I dream of cheating and I wake up and thinking, did I really cheat because it felt so good? Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm and you're a cheating piece of shit and she has the right to be angry at you for at least two days. Yes. Even though you did nothing. I used to sleep with my best. No, you cheated on me and you slept. Yeah. You acted with a dream. Don't fucking talk to me.

You put your dream dick in a dream vag and I'm not okay with it. Dream dick? That dream vag should have been my vag. Yeah, you should have been putting your dream dick in my dream vag, not this person's who didn't even have a face. Why are you even dreaming of her?

That's my question. Why is she in my dream associated with you, you piece of shit? Yeah, you should have opted out she in my dream associated with you? You piece of shit. Yeah, you should have opted out. I used to sleep with my best guy friend years ago and I haven't told my partner. Female? That's a female who used to sleep with their guy friend who has a new male partner. Oh, okay, right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And so this friend of yours who you used to shag is still probably in your life and you don't want your partner to know that you guys just have sex. Yeah. That's alright. I haven't told my partner that I hate his mother. Ugh, he'll probably tell. He can probably tell. He's probably a bitch. She'll probably tell. And you know what? Tell the mother as well.

Yeah, tell her. At Christmas. That's a twofer. Tell her at Christmas around 6pm. I have a large personal loan that he doesn't know about. Oh, no. He's gonna come back to bite you in the ass if you ever want to buy something together? Yeah, I knew somebody that broke up with their partner and then found out they

had had a loan and they were part of it. Because they were, I think that maybe used their income or their, I don't know, you've been together with someone so long half of everything. Well it's half of assets and half of debt. And they were just like, what the fuck? Far out. Anonymous says my ex was better in bed than my current partner is and I don't know how to tell my new partner. Well don't tell them that. I would not take what the ex did better and apply it to the role. Say hey I would like it if you xyz. Do exactly what Daryl did.

No no no that's not the wording. No that's not the wording. Sorry. I would like, I'd be interested if we could try A, B and C. Yeah. And then a bit more C and then A, A, A, B. A, B, B. B, B, B, B, A, A, A, A. What was that Monica Ray and Friends?

A1, A1, 2, 3, A1, 2, 3, 4, 4, A3, 4, 4, when she was talking about the ways to make a woman anyway. I go- Wow, do you watch Friends? Very- Never heard of it. The whole fucking world watches Friends. The secret I'm keeping-

Every year. Every year we watch all 10 seasons. You have to. The real cost of my clothes is the secret I'm keeping from all your time every female either. Yeah, I'm a fucking op shop. You kidding me $500 I keep spending hundreds of dollars a week on my new on my PlayStation game, and I won't tell my partner What does the PlayStation game microtransactions? Okay, I'm always spending hundreds of dollars on a week. I've got a gamer here That's a lot. That's a lot I reckon we could almost go to pardon the secret people who keep it from their bonus

Really? I'm not even halfway through no because carl and it has scheduled these And you're fucking with the very top car. I don't know how many more podcasts we needed tell me Vaughn I have planned this out very strategic place never back to back. Oh, I guess planning. Oh, yeah, great Okay, so I'll continue this Very strategic place, and they're never back to back. Meticulous planning. Oh yeah, great. Okay, so I'll continue. This is just gonna be a little calm. I apologize to Carmen for fucking up her roster. Why don't you just speak in two-time speed?

Yeah, that's hard. Listen to it anyway. No, because some people will order you listening to this on two-time. Because some people have already listened on 1.5 or 2. And if they're listening on two-time, they'll be able to understand what they're saying. And now it's gonna be extra fast. And they'll be like, why are they talking so fast? They're gonna be able to understand what they're saying. Hard enough to understand what they're saying.

I would never listen to a New Zealand podcast on two-time. Absolutely not. They speak so fast. I don't want to be over the speed. Hard enough to understand what they're talking about. I would never listen to a New Zealand podcast on two-time. Absolutely not. They speak too fast. They always speak too fast. New Zealanders just slow down. With the Americans, they really labored the speed. I turned down lounge access for a Warriors game this season for a friend's birthday dinner. I haven't told my partner who's a huge Warriors fan and has always dreamed of lounge access.

We should let him go. Go. You might not have been allowed without them. Was it a game they lost? Because if they lost, that makes it easier. Go. You might not have been allowed without them. Was it a game they lost? Cause if they lost, that makes it easier. Yeah. Somebody said, I haven't told my partner I might be a little bit lesbian.

Hey, your partner might like that. Your partner could be into it. Yeah. Could be into it. As long as he gets to be a little bit lesbian too. That's why they invented the cup chair. Are you saying he has to sit in the chair? I'm saying it's likely that

I'm not gonna want him in the room, but at least the cup chair will help. That's why bedrooms have corners. I was watching an Instagram reel that was talking about cup chairs, because Instagram loves a chat about a cup chair. I didn't know if you're in the cup chair, you can kind of tell them what to be doing.

Yeah. Sort of an entertainment thing. Oh really? I thought you just sat in the only one's service. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And now do this. I talked to someone recently who was invited into a Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And now do this. I talked to someone recently who was invited

into a bedroom to cuck someone, like the husband sat in the chair and my friend shagged his wife and he was telling me about this. He was like, the only thing that I found difficult was the amount of instructions coming from this guy. Now my friend, who's the guy in this situation, is in no way queer,

so he wasn't interested in the guy at all. He was like, Bing, watch this fight. He was like, the guy was like, like step by step instructing him what to do to his mind. I had no idea that was what the cut-chew was. And then the husband popped out, it was in a hotel, popped out to get something. And then he was like, and then me and the wife just had a better shag. Because this guy wasn't bloody telling us what to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right.

Fun. Go on. This guy wasn't bloody telling us what to do. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, right. Fun. Go on. Then I saw my ex after three years and still got pussy flutters. Oh, don't say that. I deciphered, they did a cat emoji and then butterflies. We'll just say. When I saw my ex after three years, I got fanny flutters. Fanny flutters.

Fanny flutters. Do I say pussy in front of... Fletch. Hayley! Stop that! So upflit. Hayley can't stand them. Blip. Blip. Lost my engagement ring, claimed insurance and got a new one the exact same never told my partner.

Oh. Yeah. I knew his proposal date and planned before it happened. I don't have the heart to ever tell him that it wasn't a complete surprise when he proposed to me That's cute. And your acting was like, oh my god. Oh my god. Wait, wait Are we getting married? I've never told my partner that I won Lotto before we got together. Shit the fucking bitch Did you get a prenup? Holla we want want prenup. Holla. We want prenup. Botox, somebody said. I've never told my partner about my botox.

And I tell them they don't notice, honestly. Yeah. And then when you tell them it's, you can only notice. Yeah. That's all you can see. I shit myself when he was in the room, he doesn't know. You must have exited that room pretty fast before the smell. Yeah.

That his cousin sends me dick pics and videos every time he has a shower. I haven't told my partner Okay, what do we like receiving these pictures from the cousin? I don't know because if we don't we'll be I think we should be calling that behavior out We don't have a cousin naughty cousin. I never told my partner that I scrubbed the toilet bowl with his toothbrush after a very heated argument Oopsie daisy or two. That's me that I matched on tinder with his brother before I matched with him. I That's naughty. That I matched on Tinder with his brother before I matched with him.

Oh, Jesus. I haven't told my partner I faked orgasms for the entire first year of our relationship. Luckily it got better. Okay, well that's fine, just leave it. Was there some teaching there? We gotta stop faking it. Don't fake them.

It's a gift. Someone said I sometimes eat mackeys without them and I don't say anything. Oh yeah, I used to do that. You know when couples go on diets together or they're doing healthy eating and someone will stop on the way home and get a Quartie piece and nuggets, a frozen Coke and then some whole Sara Lee cheesecakes.

So they do those anymore? I think they might have knocked it on the head. A supermarket cheesecake. Cheesecake factory. I'd go to the cheesecake shop. And then go back and be like, man, this lettuce rules. Yeah, man, this diet's not working. I don't know what's happening.

Somebody said, I keep my secret. My secret I keep from my partner is my opinion of him. I think he's a self-centered anal piece of work prick. Okay, why are you with this guy? What a waste of time. Leave. You gotta get out. Leave.

I don't love his macaroni cheese as much as I say I like it, but I wanted him to feel encouraged to be able to cook more. Oh. But you don't like the mac and cheese. Now every time he cooks, he's like, oh, I'm know the mac and cheese now every time you tell me it's more than a packet macaroni. It's better bloody be from scratch. I, and finally, uh, the secret I'm keeping from my partner that I've been fucking his friend for the last two years. It's not while someone will sit on this and do this for two years with your partner.

And then a radio station pops up a little anonymous box on Instagram and they're like, tell us what you're doing. And someone's like, I'm going to tell them. Like, but there's something in you, the person has messaged who wants it to be known, otherwise you wouldn't message. There's something in you that is like, I want it. I don't want the secret anymore. Why are you with your partner? Like, why not just be with them?

Yeah. Maybe they don't want to be with them. If you want both, maybe that's a discussion with your partner about being polyamorous. There was an episode of Dory the CEO a few weeks back with- Esther Peral. Yeah. And she was saying that women get bored of sex

sooner than men. Yes, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That doesn't surprise me. And that was amazing. It's just, cause most people would think it would be men. Yeah. Yeah, I know.

She's amazing. Her whole thing is about, yeah Anyway, anyway, check her out. They're interesting And those are the those are the secrets you're keeping from your partner