ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod -16th October, 2025

Episode Date: October 15, 2025

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; how is Hayley not flagged at the airport by now...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZDM podcast network, it's Fletchforn and Haley's Little Bit of Pod. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod and just another reminder, dear podcast, listener, that our Christmas cocktail specials... Spin it out, boy! We'll be back for the summer break, and you've got until the 31st of October to submit yours. You can go to ZM online. The link is in our Instagram bio as well, FVHZM. Basically, fill out the form. Tell us a little bit about you.

We've got some questions and prompts there. And then we'll go through those As we drink cocktails Tell us something fun about yourself Yes, after the group Yeah What would be your fun bit If we were in a little hooey

And we're just meeting people Hello, my name's Hayley Sprow I am Well, I once represented New Zealand In the sport of marching And everybody would be like Is that a sport? And I'd say yes it is

Now move the fuck on Right I don't know You got nothing I'm quite angry I don't know what you want I know what you want I don't like

A tidbit A tidbit I don't want to have to There's too many tidbits. I don't like these things. We were on a, was it when we did the, we did a tour once, and they were like, in the van, we were driving there, and they were like, okay, everybody, tell us a fun thing about yourself. It's like, fuck off, just drive me to this activity.

No, it's going to pass the time in the van. I get it. It gives you a little bit of an intro to them. It's a getting a little bit of Jenny say quoth. Okay, if you were on a desert island and you can only take one animal with you, Vaughn, what would you take? Um, a whale. Why the fuck? You're on an island.

Eat it, eat it. And then you can make candles. No one's, yeah, exactly. All the blubber you could. I was going to say dog is great companion, but then you've got another mouth to feed. Yeah, another mouth to feed. You're going to have to eat it. And that dog will eat you.

And it could come to man versus dog. A fletch, if you could go back in time and have one dinner with one person dead or alive, who would it be? Hmm. You've got to say Hitler and stab him. Went to like a 1928 Hitler dinner. Yeah, here is your sausage roll. Blah! Stabed through the thing.

That's a knife inside the sausage roll. Yeah, but then you've just committed a political assassination. You're going to get hung for that. No, but you're your time machine out of there. Oh, your time machine back out of there? Yeah. Okay, true. But then what are the repercussions of changing that?

Yeah. The butterfly effect of one of the most devastating events of the 20th century. No, and then on it goes and on it goes. And on it goes and the flow on effect. Okay, so I probably just let that happen then. Probably just, um, Frank Sinatra. It's happened. It's happened.

Yeah. It's happened, it's happened So you could have a dinner with someone who's dead Is that what you mean? Yeah, mine would be Freddie Mercury But he'd be propped up at the table dead Yeah, he'd be riddle Yeah, just absolutely like fucking whittles

Everywhere Yeah, yeah, yeah Because you said dinner with anyone dead or alive I was just like, well, dead person wouldn't be great They're got to be alive They're back to being alive Wait, so you would choose someone like Freddie Mercury Overknifing Hitler

And stopping a genocide Oh my God, we'd have such a good yard We'd have drinks, probably be a bit naughty. He probably love me. Oh, I love her. So you say. Yeah, he would. Is it like that time you thought Hugh Graham was going to love you?

And he didn't, eh? I know, fuck. Okay, well, at the weekend, you went to Melbourne. Yeah, and this has happened to me multiple times, but I was shocked this time. A great transition there, I just wanted to acknowledge Fletcher's sweet transition. It was glorious. Seamless, seamless, segue way. It's a big part of my job is getting you two on track.

I forgot what we were talking about. I forgot what we were talking about. I was lost. That all spurt off the podcast shoutouts of the happening. Where, this is us out and see. Help! Help! Fletch throw us the thing.

Life ring. Yeah, I was. I went to Melbourne over the weekend, and you know when I travel, I like to travel with friendly, buzzing accompaniments. It's the podcast. You can say delos. Vibrators, you name it. And I'd really packed a kit, this trip. And you didn't check in.

And I didn't, no check in bag. So I knew this was going through security. So what I did was I put it all into one sort of case. You have to take them on board anyway because of the batteries? Yeah, but you don't. You don't. No, lithium ones you do. Yeah, yeah, these ones are fine.

Vibrators can go in the thing. Oh, I thought they had lithium batteries in them. I don't know. Some of them are just big, thick, D cells. Oh, nah. Haley's got the one with the battery inside that's for dolphin torches. Yeah. The big gym.

The big gym battery. The 12 volt, the 12 volt from Ever Ready. So I had them all in this little... Car battery one. She's got a nuclear fusion one. Solar power. She's got a solar power kit. She's got a hydrogen cell.

Yeah, yeah. Nuclear. Oh my God. So I had them all in this like little kit so that if they, in the inevitable case that they had to go through it. This is a problem. When you pack a suitcase like this, you've got to separate everything because otherwise together it looks like a giant Dildo bomb. Yeah, I know, but rather than scatter it and then they've got to go through my panties and everything.

Dildo bomb was my Rockwest band name. Dildo bomb. That's cool. Yeah. I think you were heavy, heavy metal. We were like an old chick punk band. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, love that.

Love that. Scarf. Chit, chit, ch cherry bomb. You know that song? Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Duddle bomb. B buzzing in my honey and I put in him in my house.

Yeah, that kind of stuff. And I chipped my tooth. Oh, ow, ow. Oh. Jesus. So, God, the AD is HDing today, isn't it? so I put it in this I make a dodo bomb and I put it in my suitcase

do do do do do do do do and it goes through in Auckland straight through no questions asked like it didn't even get fucking pulled over I was like miraculous you guys are funny like honestly this is what fucks me office so much about airport security

is and it happens all the time in New Zealand Christchurch is so different to Auckland so different you go through and nothing beats and then coming back you're wearing exactly the same thing And it's beat, beep, beep, beep, and you're just like, why? Yeah, so I couldn't believe this Dildo bomb. Ditt Dildo bomb! Didn't go off.

Yeah. So I go, I have my weekend in Melbourne, and then coming back through, I've, you know, repacked the Dildo bomb. You're away two nights and you need all this shit. Dildo bomb. Where do you need all this shit for two nights? Because I had plans. Okay. End of story.

Finn. Spin. on the prow. Ding, dill and did it with a did do do do do do do do bomb. Love it. So then on the way back, I just assumed that it was going to be the same situation because I knew my toiletries were separate in this and I was like, okay, well, there you go.

I've got my dodo bomb. And it goes through and immediately gets pulled in. There's that moment where you're watching your bag. It's sitting there and it can either be. It hovers at the point, hey. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So it gets pulled in. And what I like to do is look ahead to see who will be doing the rummaging.

Oh, yeah. And I see two mid-50-year-old men. Oh, yeah, okay. No women, no nothing. And I was like, this is going to be fun. And the guy, like, he's looking through someone else's bag, and I'm standing there, popping my shoes back on. And then he pulls in my suitcase.

They do that thing. They're like, is this yours? Yeah, it puts it up on the thing. and then like you know they pull up the screen and the information gets set and then I see the guy behind the main guy's staring at the screen and the guy behind him is just looking over his shoulder

but like you know what are we got and then the guy just goes rolls his eyes and has a big like smile on his face and I clock eyes with him and I was like mm-hmm and the guy's look and goes hi

did did did doodle bomb and he goes is this yours is it and I said yes it sure is and he said wow Do you have a good weekend, did you? Cheaky bastard, eh. I thought he's going to say, you're a horny wee thing, aren't you?

No, no, no, he did it. But you could see it, they were a lot. They had the biggest smirks on their faces. They were just having a good laugh. Honestly, check a bag next time. That's so embarrassing. Oh, I don't care. I mean, the things in this kit.

But, I mean, yeah, they would have had such a good laugh. But I love that he even said, good weekend there. And I just laughed, and I said, thank you. And I went away. And they were having a good chuckle as I walked off. And then I got home and unpacked my D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-O bomb!