ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 19th February 2024

Episode Date: February 18, 2024

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Hayley reveals a personal ailment!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod Great things are brewing at McCafe The perfect start to every day Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod If I tell you guys something Will you promise not to judge me and still be my friend? I mean, I can say on my behalf I can't speak for the people who listen

Who number in their thousands I know, but I mean more for you two Because you've got to be around me still Is it mankier than Vaughan's banana the other day? It might be a little bit mankier. I'm eating a pretty manky nectarine right now too. This thing's got like worry lines. It needs Botox.

Yeah, it does. Yeah, you're gross. It looks like it's smoked its whole life. It's got lines. If this nectarine could talk, it would talk like this. I don't know what you bloody kids want from me. Hey, yeah. God damn it.

I've developed three warts. Oh. Where? There. On your knee. Yeah, I'll show you. Oh, don't touch it. Oh, no, no.

Are they contagious? Yep. Is it rough? Yep. There's one. There's two. Oh, how have you got those? I have no idea.

I have no idea. At the pharmacy, you can get like... I could get the burn off ointment. No. Oh, no, no, no. You want to use the dandelions. No, they have little burny things, like little applicators, and they'll burn them off. Oh, really?

And if it's gross, then I'll be walking around my life and I'll just drop a water on the ground and not know. It just looks like you've got three ciggy marks on your leg, I think. Yeah. Weird. And that one's quite big. That's just come out of nowhere.

It's so weird to get a wart as an adult. I know. I had warts as a kid. I had a really big one on my hand. I never, ever had them. I've got another one on my wrist that's been there for years. I'm warty.

I'm a witch. Apparently you're warts. Have you asked Dr. Shawnee? No, I haven't asked resident Dr. Shawnee. He'll just say hydrocortisone and some crystals though. Hydrocortisone and bloody amethyst up the cooch and then see if that gets rid of it. I'm sick of his diagnoses.

I know. I just saw it the other day and was like, that definitely hasn't been there. I've got warts. That is quite... Like I'm producing them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. In adulthood.

That's odd. In my adulthood. There's none on that leg. But just on the other leg, there's three. And then one on my wrist. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's manky. That's very.

I wonder if Aaron's got warts. Like I wonder if I'm rubbing up against him. He could have rubbed off on you and given them to you. Or, you know what? You probably got them from the toilet seat. You can get them by casual skin contact or through shared objects like towels or washcloths. The virus is usually spread through breaks in your skin

such as a hangnail or a scrape. Hangnail? Ooh, have you been like frottaging on some public transport? No. Like humping some stranger's legs? I haven't been using, we've got my own shower now, so I haven't been using the gym showers. Yeah.

I've been to a couple of weddings recently. Has it reached the genital area? I don't believe so, but it's been a while since I've done a drop squat. You don't want to be itching the wart and then itchy cooch. And then putting warts on my cooch. Yeah. Oh, my God. The virus is contagious.

So you could spread it on yourself. And also wipe down the desk, too. Because Bree uses this. Yeah. Well, maybe it was Bree. Could be giving Bree warts. Bree's warts. Actually, Bree could be giving me warts.

Because if it's on the knee and the leg, the leg goes under the table and there's little scraper bits you could scrape. And my wrist rests like that on the show. She's a wart carrier. I don't know if you're going to go out and accuse her. Brie Thomasale from The Wart Hog herself has warts, and she's given me warts. No, but you could be giving them to her. No, she's given them to me.

Well, if she didn't give them to you, you're certainly giving them back. Maybe a guest came in and gave them to you. Who have we had? I remember as a kid, kids were, like, covered in warts, and their parents never did anything about it. We had wart Wednesdays at our local doctor. Wart Wednesdays? It was like you could go in and get

it was the day that they had the machine with the ice thing and you'd go get your warts zapped off. Yeah, what do they call it? Dry ice. It's like a gun. Did you have a dandelion in the warts? No. You know dandelions, you crack them open in the stalk and it's got that white milk? Sour thistle's the best. Dandelion the warts? No. What is that? You know dandelions, you crack them open in the stalk and it's got that white milk? Oh my God.

Sour thistle's the best. Dandelion milk. You put the milk on and then you put a plaster over it. Trust me. You should go to Dr. Shawnee and get an amethyst up the cooch, I reckon, rather than dandelion milk. Peace and love, mate. Also, he is not going to appreciate you saying that he told you to put an amethyst up the cooch. Dandelion milk for warts, huh?

Fuck you. First good result. Yeah, but you can also Google- Dandelions have antimicrobial properties, which will be useful for fighting warts. It doesn't mean anything. You can also Google how to recharge your crystals. Yeah, exactly.

For your mood. It's not a thing. They'll give you the moon phases and stuff. Yeah. Well, anyway, please still be my friend. And there is a chance, actually, that tonight I was going to stay at Fletcher's, rub my warts all over his sheets.

Oh, no, you're not saying it's mine. See, this is what I said. You can't isolate me now. You can't put me on Leopard Island because I've got four warts on the go. Don't look at me like that. Shall I ask Dr. Shawnee if it's okay for you to sleep in my bed? Because I don't want, not my bed, the spare bed. I don't want you warts in my sheets.

I nearly let out a fair slip. I know. No, you would break up with me now. You need the cold water surf dandelion. It'll wash it out of your sheets as well. No. I'm a bit of a dandelion, guys. So I don't know. Dandelion money.