ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 19th May, 2025

Episode Date: May 18, 2025

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; "Plague Sack"See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify or wherever you get your podcasts

From the ZM Podcast Network It's Fletch Vaughan and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod Um, I had a mouse, I had a mouse situation This is manky Rats are worse Yeah, I hate rats Oh, I killed a possum this This is manky. Rats are worse. Yeah, I hate rats. Oh, I killed a possum this week too, so you're welcome.

I never get possums at my house. You probably do, you just wouldn't see them. Never hear them or see them, see the beady little eyes. Should put a trap up. We'll put a trap on your trees. Are you going to put a trap on my tree? Rolly's not a tree climber. Nah.

He doesn't like apple with cinnamon sprinkled on it. Nah. It's weird cats don't like apple cinnamon sprinkled on it it smells like an apple pie oh my god you're dumb

if the dogs could get up to that trap they'd be they'd be they'd be they'd be the deadest possum

I'd just smell out anything in a trap I'd be like this tastes so yum it smells so yum oh my god what's that I'm just gonna grab it

and pull a kick back and bolt through my head and then I'm dead you're dead and now you're a scarf inside of my slippers I opened my

I got my school bag my backpack I bring to work to put a t-shirt in the other day and when I opened it there was a mouse in there and it was eating my porridge sachet

it had chewed open my porridge sachet and it was helping itself to roll oats I know it's so yuck that's so mangy I would throw out the whole bag

also that bag needs to go we need a new bag I would hurdle that thing into the dump I would throw out the whole bag Also that bag needs to go We need a new bag I would hurdle that thing into the dump I went And like shook the bag upside down real quick And the mouse fell out outside It was like

Did it shit everywhere? Nah I don't think it would have been there for long This is how plagues start Vaughn Are you bringing your plague bag into the studio? I was thinking Imagine if I hadn't opened it up To put a t-shirt in that morning

Which I never do You would have brought it here I would have opened it up And a mouse would-shirt in that morning, which I never do. Ooh, you would have brought it here. I would have opened it up for, and a mouse would have been like, Scary, scary, scary, scary, scary. Hey. Where's my phone? And then we'd have to call the show Fletch, Warren and Stuart. Yeah.

Whatever. And I'll be out. Yeah. You know, last in, first off. Yep, that's fair enough. Yeah, the mouse is actually pretty crack up. Little. So I went and got some new mouse traps, because mouse traps don't last forever.

I set up the board game. Don't they? He didn't fall for that. You'd think you'd spend all that money on mousetrap the board game. You'd think you'd at least play it. Put a little bit of cheese under the falling basket. He didn't fall for that for a second. So I put what I did.

Here's what I think is a hot mix. So I took one of the bags of rolled oats that he had nibbled into because I was like, this guy likes these. Obviously coming in for the bags of rolled oats That he had nibbled into Because I was like this guy likes these Obviously coming in for the smell of this And I got a little teaspoon of peanut butter And I dipped it into the porridge mix What if he's got a nut allergy That's really not fair

And then made a little ball Yeah did you check if he had a nut allergy That's a very good question Yeah But the good news is Once he gets to the nuts The rod that comes down and cracks him On the back of the neck

Is going to take care of the allergy When you let him flare up quickly Just when you said when you get to the nuts And there's a rod Yeah And it comes out and smacks them on the back of the neck is going to take care of the allergy. When you literally flare up quickly. Just when you said when you get to the nuts and there's a rod. Yeah. And it comes out and smacks you on the back of the neck. I'm straight to cock and balls. Nuts and a rod? That's right to cock and balls.

That's what I call cock and balls. Nuts and a rock. Nuts and a rock. Yeah. Yeah. So he's probably having the best time of his life. There's some nuts. There's a rod.

There's a rod. Who ain't happy? What a way to go. What a way to go What a way to go So I set up Four traps Because I don't fuck around Yeah

And I put them in all the little What I believe to be Is paths Oh yeah Entry points Entry points Yeah Two at the entry point

Some other covered areas You've got a hole in your hat Like a little They're really easy to spot They're like a half circle In the skirting board Yeah With a little door

With a door With a little door. The cute grey mouse comes out. And if you open it. Where's that cat? Sometimes if you watch it, just after five o'clock he gets home from work in his little suit.

You need to board that up. Yeah, I will. You board that up. I'll have to serve an eviction notice and give 90 days. Of course you will. You can't just put him out on the street. There's so many rules these days. Yeah, and he'll want his bond back.

So I set up these four traps, and Richie, the dog, I said to him, sniff out this mouse. Like, what's up? And he's want his bond back. So I set up these four traps, and Richie, the dog, I said to him, sniff out this mouse. Like, what's up? And he's just like, nah. Okay, useless. Not a dog's game. Nah, as a cat.

What you're after, my friend, this is what he said to me, what you're after is a cat. Yeah, well, I picked up a mouse corpse this morning as well. From a cat. Gotcha, okay, so you're a dog, so you're not going to be able to do it. But no, he never woke up when the mouse came in to jump in the bag. Yeah. Nothing roused him.

Now, what I will say at one o'clock this very morning, what did rouse him was the trap going clack, and then he's like, roar, like just like a dog in a cartoon. Like it's waking him up. He's heard this noise. He's, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar, roar. Running so fast, he's like, skim on the floor. Davis would have loved that.

Like Scooby-Doo. Four o'clock? Yeah, great. One o'clock. One o'clock? Yeah, one o'clock. One o'clock? One o'clock. I would not have appreciated that. I don't think they would have heard it.

And then he sees what the kerfuffle is. I flick on the light. I get down there. He has both the mouse trap and the mouse in his mouth. The mouse traps in his mouth? Yeah. But it's off. It's gone off.

It's gone off, but it's got a mouse in it. Dogs are thick as pig shit. Cats would never no they'd probably open the thing take it delicious yeah they'd wait for you to set the table yeah yeah yeah put out the cutlery where's my knife and fork but uh yeah so i had to pry that out of his mouth at one o'clock this morning and then go and dispose of the mouse which i would usually yeah got one i don't know there might there might be a family there might be a family and i've just killed their father so the children will come looking for him and also die.

Fall prey to my series of traps. Yeah. Okay. Well, at least your porridge doesn't have mouse shit in it. Oh, yeah, yeah. You didn't eat that porridge, did you? Oh, not the porridge. I picked out the mouse shit.

But waste not want. You're gross. He's a man. He's a man of the bush. We need to burn your bag, by the way. That's disgusting. Yeah, I think it's gross too I don't want to be near

Your plague bag Your plague sack Plague sack That's what we're calling it now Your plague sack Plague sack Get that out of here This little bit of pot

Is called the plague sack Plague sack Why are you just Growing your face up With plague sack You're doing Carlin's work for her And she's just

She's like I know your fucking things It's called plague sack The plague sack Love it