ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 1st May 2026

Episode Date: April 30, 2026

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod... Vaughan is bestowing us with one of the greatest honours in life!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the ZDM Podcast Network, it's Fletchhorn and Haley's Little Bit of Pod. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. There's a lot of admin involved in being a school sports coach. Oh, that reminds me I've got to do my police check. Police. I mean, actually, you aren't coaching young girls. I mean, that makes sense. One of them's mine.

It's not like I've just walked off the street. Any kids need coaching. No, I know. Any kids need coaching. I just mean it's good in general that they run police checks. It is. Bloody kids need coaching. Now, what did I say to you before?

You said, don't do it. I said, I'm not going to, and then I got Rolshambeau. Yeah. And it's been nothing but admin and grief since. All you're doing is dealing with bloody kids and the... No worse. Teenagers. Yeah.

I've got to go to this. I haven't even had one yet. I haven't even, at time of recording, I'm going to coach my first game tonight. Like, it's not. Oh, my God. I haven't even done it yet. Do you know what I'm going to sit back with a glass of wine and watch some TV? I just don't.

No, you're not. No, I know. not but I'm doing stuff that serves me. I will. I will be. You will be. I'll probably be in bed watching shows on my iPad. Yeah. When you're actually coaching. Probably on stage or something. Yeah. Yeah. It's so, why have you done this?

I don't know. Police vetting. Where's my police vetting? What did I get a police check for? Oh, I think I did. I voice overed something that needed to make sure I wasn't a criminal. I actually might not need to do the police check because apparently I'm not coaching on school grounds. What, so you could just be a... Loephole. You could be a pest, pedophile. A pest in public.

Right, okay. Right. Interesting. Yeah, interesting. I just don't know why you're doing this, mate. What did you voice that needed a police check? Um, was it something for police recruitment, I think? Or it might be, I've done that before when you promote alcohol brands.

Yeah, and you don't have a DUI. Yeah, they want to know that you haven't been done DUI. Or you haven't been caught pissing on corny place or something like that. Which honestly, it's a miracle I have. It's very important before you go and promote vodka cruises. You've never been called pissing in public. Pissing in public and then driving. We're a high-quality brand.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Have you seen the colours of our drinks? They're natural, vibrant pinks and green. We can't have some piss-head promoting them. So I had to do some admin as well to be a coach, and it asked me for an emergency contact. What in case I dropped out of a heart attack? it anyway I've put you Fletch if that's okay

Aw, what an honour That's an honour isn't it? So I had your name and then it said Your relation to me I put Bestie Oh, that's cute He's had a heart attack Who are we contacting?

And they're opening up, they're like Oh bestie, oh Hey Bestie Hon, your best mate's died He's dead He's dead though Can you come and get his car out of the car park? When I'm overseas I do turn my phone off And don't have roaming

So if you die or anything happens during our two week July break, maybe call someone else. I'll be a I'll be overseas. I was going to say Chuck Patsy on there because she's around the corner. Give you a rock hard fuck you on that then. Pick somebody else, hon.

It's just occurred to me when you're away again in the mid-year, your parents will also be gone, am I going to be your cat's emergency contact? Yes, you are a member. If my cat dies, what you... Chuck him in a freezer. You have to pick them up, and then you're responsible for telling me, which, by the way, we'll be taking bereavement of them. I've got some good

I've been saving my sats. From a remit leave for your cat. I absolutely will be taking a day. You're going to be a fucking mess. You'll be a meh. I think we should call it Meowternity leave. Miaoternity, oh my God. And also, can I just be, I'm not using my maternity leave and I should be entitled to it.

That's why I thought. Well, you're not using it yet. I'll fane a fucking pregnancy. I'll do it. You're not using it yet. I can feel it kicking now. Oh, my breasts. Oh, they're so full.

They're full of milk. I need some time off to raise this child and they'll be like, how's the child? How's the child? Who? What is this? This is this? alternative leave. Oh, that's cute that you guys are emergency contacts.

That's really... Happy to help out. Also, don't have a car, so I don't know what I'm rushing to. I'm not anyone's emergency contact. No one's used me. I've used both of you before. You aren't reliable but not. Yeah, yeah.

I give... Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's... Like, you could be the... The totally most reliable person ever, but you could also be drunk somewhere in a ditch. I think it's the drinking, eh? It's the drinking.

I think it might do the drinking. That's fair. That's fair. In fact, this whole podcast, was just an introduction for an intervention. Everybody come on. No, no. Come on in, everybody.

One more year. Okay. This time next year. Okay.