ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod -1st November, 2025

Episode Date: October 31, 2025

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; the Producer Girlies have an update!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

From the Zedium Podcast Network, it's Fletchforn and Haley's Little Bit of Pod. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. Well, while we were away on our genuine friends' holiday, genuine friends Shannon and Carwin were hanging out and doing something that usually you'd do with a romantic partner. We had a little date. What did you do? We went and got a couple's massage together.

That's okay. Now, am I correct in thinking this is your first ever massage? Yeah, this was my first one. Carlin's had quite a few, and man, I pestered her with questions before we went in. Like, under one, leave the under's on, leave. Yes, okay, okay. This is what we need to talk about. Oh, my God.

So, no, so we had like a lovely little date plans. We, like, went out, we got a little coffee, a little tree, we went to annamid bookstore, we hung out for a bit. We recorded some silly little TikTok videos. We went some op-shopping, and then it was time to go with a massage. This is more effort than anyone puts into an actual relationship. Oh, it was a lovely little date. I'm a lovely person to date. What can I say?

She took me out. She drove me and everything. I did actually. And like the whole day, questions about the massage. Are they going to do this? What do I do with this? Do we talk? That was one of my questions. I was like, is it like a hairdresser?

Am I like, oh, like how long have you done this? You know, like that kind of vibe. No, no talking. No talking. It's relaxing. You just relax into it. And then like filling out the form. Like she's like, you have to fill out of form?

I was like, yeah. Well, you just need to like tell them, you know, like if you have any house stuff. And she's like, wait, what? How flash was this place? Oh, they do forms there. Yeah, wait. Because I've never done a form before. I've always done a form.

Yeah, I always do forms. Oh, no, I go cheap, no forms. It asked me how I was feeling today, and I was like, Carmen, what did you put? Like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

But then I didn't know how to spell arthritis, because I've got it. So I had to Google it. I was like, how do you spell arthritis? It's real quiet there as well. So I was like, how do you spell arthritis? She's like, I don't know, you have it. And I was like, okay, but, so I had to Google that.

And then when we got in the room, she's like, what does this say? And I was like, it's meant to say arthritis, but don't worry. Oh, my God, okay. And do you not fill out the forms? They, like, tell you where you should mark. Yeah. And so this is important. This is important, okay?

And where am I? Barley, you just walk in there, like, clothes off. Oh, no. So this one, like, on the form it had the outline of a body and you, like, marked on it where you're specifically feeling sore. Oh, yeah, I mean, yep, yep. Yeah, so for me, it was like shoulders. No.

It was a spring bar. Oh, that's good. And so I was aiming for shoulders, neck and, like, upper to lower back because I sit a lot with this job and I'm very sore all the time. Shannon didn't put anything, which stressed me out a little bit. I didn't know what to do, so I just said, go, you know? I've got the arthritis-ish spelling confusing. And then you're putting nothing else, but I have arthritis.

I have arthritis. Good like finding it on this whole body. so we go in and she's like get undressed here's your bed and I was like sick so we get undressed and I said to car when I said underwear's on and she's like yep and I showed her I was like look at my I purposefully wore this is important it's not just a weird detail I purposely wore quite big underwear but they flip them up anyway into your ass and they pull them down and stuff right so you say that because out of all the questions I asked carwin did she tell me no they ripped down my underwear yeah they do they got to get the top of your crack I'll be honest it was it was more than

It was like, I really felt entry almost. Oh, okay. I've had four hours before and you're like, what's happening here? I kid you not. I checked my fit bit after. My heart rate was 105 for most of the massage. So I get down and she immediately starts giving me a foot massage. And I was like, okay, well, we've paid, well, we had a voucher, but we had a back and head massage.

And I was like, these are my feet. What are you doing? And then she starts doing my legs going all the way up. Oh, she's going full ball. That's good, though. That's what you want. all the way up, you know what I'm saying? And I kid you not, I really went to speak and just say,

is this a stitch up? And I thought, for a second, is it Haley in the room? I thought this was like a radio gag and that you got me a happy ending. I fully thought this is a happy ending. Reputable spa outlets don't do a happy ending for a radio gag. I knew this was such a nice spa. It was all going so well, but I was just like, there is multiple almost entries

happening to me I didn't expect this car You last touched romantically Has it been a while Were you just like excited to be touched It was just so shocking And I get like I knew Carwin was next to me

But obviously it was silent I was like Is she doing something And then at one point Your lady walked over to my side I'm guessing she was grabbing something I don't know But I was like it's Carwin

Like I was like She's got up and she's gonna prank me I don't know I couldn't relax I couldn't relax I think maybe their messages massages aren't for you because you do the first time you get touched

so intimately by a stranger you are like this is fucking weird I mean I've been touched by a stranger plenty but not I think that's the problem yeah no the type of touching

so I started to calm down once she moved to my back and then she's like flip over and I was like stunning and then so she put the thing up over my boobs but then just like kept flapping it and like moving it

and then for like half of it she just had my boobs out. And I was like, I thought we were doing a modesty thing. Yeah, right. Yeah. Oh, she doesn't do free for my boobs out. Did you not get that?

No, I flipped over, obviously. But I didn't have, my tits weren't out. Like, they were covered most of the time. I think she, was she hitting on me? No, they were very professional. I'm not trying to slander this person. I know they were doing their job. But just as someone who didn't know what was coming

to have my underwear pulled down and hands so close to the towel. They didn't. They just didn't. They didn't talk. They didn't do the tuck. That's what was confusing. And then to have the thigh massage, when I thought it was back on, it was Wildman. And because we got in the car and she was like, oh, blah, blah, blah.

I don't know what we were saying? And then I was like, what do you mean your feet? And she was like, she did my feet and then she did my, and I was like, I didn't get any of that. Yeah, I think because you circled what you want to do. I didn't know that that was the husband. She's like, I don't want to touch your arthritis. Will you be getting another one, do you reckon? No.

Oh, so I shouldn't get that. Really? It's not for you. No, I think I just. I think for me, pampering is, like, nails or, like, I enjoyed the head massage part, but it just, I think, because I got it quite light as well, she's like, how hard. And, like, it did hurt my arthritis a little bit. Like, I was fine, but it just wasn't my idea of pampering. Right.

I would rather than circling, the areas you want, worked on, just put big X's where you don't want them to touch. Yeah, yeah. Don't touch me here, here and here and here, and here, and they're like, what are you, just your head? Yes. Yeah, I mean, it was kind of great. Like, genuinely, though, I swear, I thought it was a happy ear. and I thought it was a radio gag. Oh, my God.

I was like, Haley's in the room. I was like, I know they're in Bali, but I feel like Haley's here and she's about the... The ruse of Bali was a ruse. It wasn't actually to get Shannon, for me to give Shannon a happy... God, it's not radio in the 2000s. No, I know.