ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 21st May 2024

Episode Date: May 20, 2024

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Vaughan encountered "The Grey Sweatpants"...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bitter Pod Great things are brewing at McCafe, the perfect start to every day Welcome to A Little Bitter Pod, we've been informed to give you a trigger warning because the following podcast contains reference to penises and their soft semi and erect form I think you've almost made your trigger warning more graphic than the actual content No, it's just anatomy. It's just the beautiful form.

So please, the following podcast is not for young ears or those afraid of penis. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. Now, I don't want to say where this happened. I don't want to say where. I don't want to say when. Hey, it might have happened ages ago, and I've just plucked up the courage to talk about it. Hey, that's vague enough for us. I saw a man's dick.

Did you see a man's dick? Nice dick? It was a bomb D? Was it a bomb D? Was it a bomb D? I wasn't looking long enough. Are we all saying when we last saw a dick? Okay.

Not my weekend if we want. Three, two, one. Last night. You said it Last night. Did you see that last night? Yeah. Did you? But not in a sexy way.

Oh, you just saw it. Well, you said he was plastered. Yeah. Did he have no clothes on? No, he had clothes on. Or did he do that thing where you're getting undressed or you're drunk and you fall over? Yeah, yeah. Well, this wasn't...

Always drink responsibly. This was during the day. Always. Especially. Especially on a Sunday night, Aaron. Yes. This wasn't at, this was in the daylight hours. Okay.

This was, I was in line at a coffee cart. And you saw a dick just flopping around. I was just like. Who's got their dick out getting coffee? It wasn't like a full, it wasn't, I saw, I was. I hope this wasn't happening at show sponsor McCafe. No, no, no, no, no, no.

I was going to dick out at McCafe. Put your dick away at McCafe. That's one of their taglines. Stick him on a horse. Put him on a horse to appease the show sponsor.

Yeah. The, no, this was a coffee cart at a sports thing and this guy was walking around in grey sweatshorts. Oh no, we can't be having that. It's sweatsh was walking around in grey sweatshorts. Oh, no, we can't be having that.

It's sweatshorts season. It's sweatpants season. But these were shorts. Oh, okay. Sweatshorts. Yeah. But the same grey material as sweatpants. Yeah, yeah, hot.

What are we rocking here? Bomb D? We got a Bomb D? In between a chub and a stiffy. Yeah, but those track pants do that. I don't care. They wriggle it round. Wait, how do you know it was a chub and a stiffy. Yeah, but those track pants do that. I don't care. They wriggle it round. Wait, how do you know it was a chub or a stiffy?

Because he might just have a big old dick. No, because it was. He could be rocking a Bomb D here. Do we talk about Bomb D? No, it wasn't a stiffy because it wasn't playing like a stiffy. Right. And it wasn't nothing because it had a bit too much life. Yeah, right.

You know when you're not. Yes, I know what you mean. You know when you're just flaccid and it's got no life. There's not enough. Yeah, there was a fullness. Are we talking some supportive underwear or do we think no underwear? Zero underpants.

Zero underpants. Because when I was at drama school. Zero underpants or silk boxes. Like nothing. At drama school, the boys would get boners all the time and it was because they were rolling around in these like light track pants all the time

and they were like, it's just the lack of friction. The kind of pants you don't want a boner in those fisherman pants. Oh, the haram pants. You know, those light pajamas. Oh, yeah. Light fabric. A light linen.

You could tuck that up under the waist belt. Yeah, well, you could. Wait, this guy is just in public. You reckon he's got a boner? He's in between. I'd say he's not wearing underpants and maybe, like you said, the excitement of the friction, the motion of the ocean, has caused it to be not fully, hooray, I'm here.

Yeah. But it was definitely, and I was like, whoa, I saw it. And then I did that thing where you jerk your head back to straight and you open your eyes real quick and you're like, I wasn't looking. I wasn't looking. I wasn't looking. And then another guy in the line was kind of like chatting

and turning around and then he saw it and he did the same thing as I did and then I looked at him doing the thing and he looked at me and I looked at him and there was just this... Do you think we wanted to kiss?

We both saw the outline of this dick. Oh, right. No, we didn't want to kiss. We were both looking at the dick and we looked at each other and then we just hooked up. It was... Over this...

What the hell It was a lot And then Sade came up And la la la And were you like Checking out the dick And I was like Certainly

Check out the dick And did she check out the dick She checked out the dick What was her report on the dick She was like Oh my god She said boner too What

Definitely not Chub or boner Chub Oh my god If you were in public And got a boner, you'd just be like, take yourself away. Although, what was the line like for the coffee? He wasn't in line for the coffee. He was trotting around and he had his kid on his shoulders.

Because he's walking. He's walking. He's bouncing. And the track pants are brushing. Oh, no. What do you do? Sounds like a bomb day to me. But he must have been aware of it.

You're kind of aware of your member's state. Are you? Yeah, I think so. Yeah, right. Even with just a little semi. You would know that it was happening. Oh, my God. That's horrible.

I feel like you would. In its dormant state, it goes unnoticed. What's the worst place you've ever been with a boner? School bus. When it came to getting off the school bus. Yeah, like I just tucked a boner in my school. Oh, fuck. getting off the school bus. Oh, did you? Yeah, like I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in.

I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in. I just tucked it in.

I just tucked it in. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Go away. Go away. Go away. Especially at an all-boys school. Yeah.

That age. You gotta tuck it. You gotta tuck. You gotta tuck. And I'm sure I've told this story before. There was a guy at school that did a tuck, but he tucked it in between the pant and the shirt, so he saw the little end of his his anteater poking out and we were all just like

oh my dude and yeah it's amazing he got called tip for a while tip tip because it's really

like you can call someone tip in front of a teacher and they're not gonna like the teacher's not gonna be like hey stop calling him tip tip I love that we should do

how did you get your high school nickname off the back of that oh that's great that's pretty funny that's great Lock that in It would be trauma Maybe trauma inducing

But it could be funny Yeah We could trauma bond