ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 25th July 2023

Episode Date: July 24, 2023

On Todays Lil Bitta Pod; Shannon poses a Question!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Fletchborn and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Macca's rewards. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. Hey guys, it's me, Hayley Sproul. First of all, can I tell you, I had a dream last night about Jason Momoa. Okay, right. And I only just remembered it was so real that he,

because we talked yesterday I think about he's delaying the filming of one of his things so the riders strikes and then he wasn't coming back to New Zealand and I was sad and I was obviously thinking about it

and then I had a dream last night that I was like at somewhere and he was like hey man and I was like why don't you tell me you were here because we're like

close friends and he was like oh I don't know I'm just sort of here and then he was like do you want to come on a trip with me and I said yes

and then we got on a plane and then he was like, we're off to Sydney, baby. And were you like, oh, I wanted to go to like Hawaii? Yeah, I was sort of like, this is a bit shit actually. Right, okay. Anyway, that was my dream. But then what happened when you got to Sydney? I think we were on the plane like having a laugh and stuff. And I kept being like, I love Melbourne.

He kept correcting me and being like, no, we're going to Sydney. Like I was really not into the Sydney vibe. Pushing for Melbourne. Who were you flying? Were you in economy or private? I think we were in economy. I think we were just in a normal plane. Okay, so he doesn't have a private jet. Crammed in. No, he's an eco

warrior. Oh, of course, yeah. I don't know what he flies. Anyway, that was a side thought because Chanelette Pyjamas has brought us a question straight from the interwebs yeah it's a bit grim but let's have fun with it oh my god that's not a great start shannon okay how many toddlers do you think it would take to take you down they're just toddlers coming at you there's an unlimited amount what's your cat how violent can we be are they like are they like zombie toddlers coming at you. There's an unlimited amount. What's your cat? How violent can we be? Are they like zombie toddlers? The wording here says feral. Oh, yeah.

Okay, so zombie. Yeah. Okay, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, zombie toddlers, that's a different story because they're not a bite and it's over. But an ordinary toddler could bite you and you could still, you know, take the ride. Let's go feral. Let's go feral.

So they're coming at you. You might get a hit. What's your cat? Okay. You might get some hit. You might get a hit, but that's treatable. I would say four I'm good. Wait, so hang on.

We're allowed to fight them to the death? Yeah. It seems a bit rough. Can we kick them? Yeah. This is hypothetical. Okay. It's just the concept of like they're little.

Right. So you'd naturally think you could do a few. How long? Like a foot high? I guess so. A foot high. 30 centimeter high toddler. It's a baby man

But then it's a baby Okay so what are they Four? It's up to your hip At least Because it's going to be A lot It's going to be

A lot Run around Yesterday I was driving past A road Yeah And there was a mum A toddler And like I would say

A small medium dog And you know when you look At like a small medium dog You're like That's a small dog And then I saw it Next to the toddler And I was like

Man the toddler must be like This is a big ass dog you were you stoned no you imagine like being a kid looking at like a labrador or even a saint bernard in the eye it would be like ass with a horse i know this is what i thought i was like because the dog was like up to its shoulder yeah and i was like what animal's up to my shoulder? Yeah, like a horse. A horse. Okay, so getting back to fighting the feral toddlers, am I allowed a flamethrower? You can have whatever you want. But they get it as well. They don't get it.

Oh, yeah, new rule. No, they're a toddler. They can't operate a flamethrower. No, it has to be hand-to-hand combat. Yeah. That's the world we live in. Am I allowed

like a heavy digger or dump truck? I think for fairness, yeah, should we say it's bare hands? Bare hand combat. I'll probably just run them over with a steamroller then. No, you're not allowed a steamroller.

That's not bare hand combat. You've got to kick it and punch it. Well, then they all have little miniature steamrollers made for toddlers, which would be hella cute. Run of your toe and you're like, ow. Ah, cha-cha-cha-cha-cha. I've just looked at the comments section. Someone said that they were a teacher and they reckon they could do 10.

10 toddlers. Toddlers? Yep. But again, am I allowed a flamethrower? No flamethrowers. You guys are quite strong. I'd push them because they take ages to get up. I'd fling them. I'd start like rotating, spinning around like a star until they started

flying off me. I'd grab one in each hand and use them to bat the other one's way and then throw them over. That's like bommie knockers. You grab one each by the arm and just spin because then it'll drop. They're lower because your arms can't get that low with any sort of power. But now you've got weights and then your arms are da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Yeah.

Wow, this is good. Okay, I'm going to say 50. You could do that thing. 50? Wait, do they line up and then come at you one at a time or are they all 50 at once? No, they're all just flying at you all at a time or are they all 50 at once? No, they're all just

flying at you all at once. I'm going to say 20. Am I allowed to build a moat? No, you can't. You're in a ring. You're in a wrestling ring. You're fighting them. None of this has been said.

No prep time. Okay. You're in a coliseum. Oh, okay, yep. And you know those big like lion trap doors? Yeah. It's just that

and toddlers are coming at you At what? Now you also have the roar of the crowd to egg you on Is there a crowd? Big crowd Oh okay They're all toddlers They're on team toddler

It's a sport You can run but you can't run away Yeah right You can only go in the coliseum But they've got so much energy They're going to need a nap Yeah they are I would say the answer according to tiktok

is around three people have low expectations i back myself to take at least 10 yeah i yeah how yeah yeah if you're throwing them they're not getting up all the time also uncoordinated and quite stupid they don't have tap you know they don't have like they wouldn't be able to get their shit together no they wouldn't go like hey you get the knees and you go for the ankles. They'd just be like. And start crawling on you. Resilient hand-to-hand combat. But the minute they got you like.

Down. There was a clot and then you were down. Yeah, like zombies. And then they just kept piling on top of you. Yeah. I keep yelling at them like, your parents don't love you. And I try to emotionally shock them so that they were like, whoa. I'd be like, there's a man inside Barney the dinosaur.

Inside the Teletubbies. They're not real. I'd say stuff like that. They'll lay down with rage for you ruining their childhood. Yeah. Easter's about Jesus, not a bunny. That kind of stuff. No.

Yeah. Don't try to spread your Christian message. I'd say I'm turning off the wifi If you come near me Yeah exactly Bluey's actually racist Have you ever seen him? He's definitely not He's a lovely, it's a she anyway

The dad's not called Bluey, it's the kid that's called Bluey Oh Bluey's dad's a big racist Yeah he is And he went to prison for terrible things He did He did blackface He did