ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 25th November 2024

Episode Date: November 24, 2024

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Producer Carwen's friend shared a little too much with a stranger...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

For a few years, in the 1970s, the Mr Asia syndicate made millions. Heroin creates its own market. It acts like a form of play. Until jealousy, betrayal and murder brought it all crashing down. Then he just pulled out a gun, shot her in the back of the head, and then said to Wayne, you're going to help me bury her. This is Mr Asia, A Forgotten History. All episodes now available on iHeartRadio, Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

The ZM Podcast Network. Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Macca's rewards. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. And just a reminder, the cutoff for for our Christmas Cocktail Special shout-out is coming soon on the 4th of December. If you want a shout-out for our record, which is happening soon,

go to zmonline.com slash cocktail special or if you're in New Zealand, you can just text the word as one word, cocktail special to 9696. We'll give you a link so you can make those. I reckon if the cut-off's the 4th, we're recording on the 6th. We are, yes.

It's a big week, too. We've got Troy Savant. What do you mean, put it in your calendar? It's in the calendar, babes. Oh, not my personal calendar. I don't have my work calendar linked to my personal. Mine's all one. How do you navigate a life?

I don't. You'll be well aware when something pops up at work, and I'll be like, no, I don't have that in my calendar. It's because it's not on my calendar. That's a big week for us to podcast record because we've got Troy Savan on Tuesday on a work night. Or is it Monday? Monday.

Then the Tuesday we've got a very special launch for a friend. Yes, we do. Yes. Then I'm doing a gig on the Wednesday, which I assume you two will be coming along. No. It's in East Auckland. So you'll be coming along to support me.

Oh my God, my least favourite direction in Auckland. And I believe you'll be coming to support me as one of your closest friends. Then you'll be there to support me the next day when God, my least favourite direction in Auckland. And I believe you'll be coming to support me as one of your closest friends. Then you'll be there to support me the next day when I get my nails done. Then it's the cocktail special. Yes, on Friday. And then Saturday we've got a lunch with the gaggle. Like the post-Christmas lunch with the gaggle.

Fucking hell. West Auckland is my first. It's my favourite. Okay. I'm on the compass directions of Auckland. Then south. I am far to the north. Because I lived on the north. I've never to the north. Because I lived on the north.

I've never lived in the south. I do love the south. I'm central. North east. Oh, are we calling it central? Is that northwest? No, that's north east. I thought it was central.

It always lacks a bit of personality. Excuse me. West, south, central, north, east for me. West, north, south, central, east. We all agree east is last. Producer Carwen has a question for us. Well, not so south, central, east. We all agree east is last. Producer Carmen has a question for us. Well, not so much a question, just a bit of a little story. A story to tell.

So the house in which I live is going on the market. Oh, okay. I think I was in the market for a nice little house in Auckland. Don't fucking look at us, mate. Carry on. We've got our own houses and our own problems. You're not going to build a house and a whopping mortgage. Yeah, no thanks.

Do you know one of my friends messaged me the other day? They're like, I wish you hadn't beeped out when Vaughn and Hayley told Bad News Brad their mortgage size. Who was it that wanted to know? Just a friend. You don't know. Bad News Brad's eyes watered and he said, oh. He had a serious chat to us after we stopped recording. We know.

The money. We went out for breakfast afterwards and we sat there being like being like yeah but it's not as bad brad as it as it seems by the number because oh i've got a plan i've got a plan brad and he's like are you getting satisfaction out of this oh yeah i was like yes i do and he's like well then it's worth it yeah if you're getting what you want for the lifestyle and i said thank you brad so you're the house you live in which you don't own but owns. Yeah, it's going on the market. And yesterday we had the real estate agents come through with a photographer. Oh, yeah.

Take a little cute piccies. These motherfuckers. Go on. I can't wait to hear that. Oh, they love wetting a deck. Made your lounge look like a... They love wetting a deck. They love wetting a patio.

They love greening a lawn that's brown. No, they wouldn't need to wet Carwen's deck because she recently washed and stained. We did. That's right. We did. And I always, Ryan T's friend of the show, husband of Maddie McClain, real estate agent to the stars, White Fox, here's the problem, here's the solution. What is it?

Obvious. Something that they've got a marketing thing. Okay. He always uploads photos of these amazing houses for sale. I'm like, why didn't they fucking clean the deck? Oh, yeah. Cleaning and restaining your deck is probably going to cost my big deck. I've got a huge

deck. You do have a giant one. Wrap around. Wrap around. It wraps right around. Yeah, it makes up my small deck. Now, it's not cheap, but to stain that's about $500 in stain. Yeah. That's a lot. Waterblaster I own, so I don't need to hire that, so I'm

counting out a weekend. We're borrowing it at the moment God it's fucking nice it's crazy do you know it made me a bit horny did it Aaron was wearing

shorts that were too short and I liked that and he he was a wild hero and he was water blasting the fence and God wasn't

the fence wasn't the only thing getting wet anyway carry on did he water blast your fence Jesus what was I going to say Ryan yeah the deal i'm saying is you make so much more money with a freshly stained deck beautiful fucking lunatics not washing and staining their deck and she complimented on us fuck yeah she was like it looks beautiful

yeah also this isn't your house like you're just renting right so why did you but my friend owns it so i'm helping her out oh right she owns it okay otherwise i'd be like fuck that yeah do your own and so obviously we did a big clean and everyone's kind of like put things away whatever because you know they don't want stuff in the photos um we get a message in the flat chat uh yesterday afternoon saying our real estate agents have said that they have moved some things around so there might be things put away or whatever or moved in different spots. They like to stage that. If they can see how it would look better and make it look bigger.

But that's an insight to your interior ring, isn't it? If they change something. All they're going for is making it look bigger. But did you leave when they did the photos? Yeah, I stayed at work. I did this once when I sold our last place and we stayed to make sure aesthetically it was all looking kia. No, she knows what she's doing

I hope. Right, okay. And so like she'd moved like the cat's bowl and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then a few hours. The radox from the shower. Yeah. Oh, I did that obviously. Put in an A-sop that's full of palm olive. It's full of orange palm olive. I wonder if she moved my almost empty

Akoya hand soap because i just can't fathom getting rid of it anyways now fill it up with cheap shit i think i'm gonna do a fledge yeah um anyways and then a few hours later like night time our my flatmate messages a chat and says our real estate agents might um have put some things away in my nightstand last night uh for the photos he's safe for for the photos. Fuck off. And she then goes, the drawer in which I keep every sex toy I've ever owned. Oh my god.

And I said, babe, this is why I put mine in a little bag in there. Mine's in a little kit. You've got a kit, like an amenities. Yeah, like I've got a sack of toys. Mine's in a shame. Like an amenities. Yeah, like I've got a... Like a toiletries bag. Like a toiletries bag. Mine's in a shame case. Oh, no. Yeah, I have to pray to open it.

And often halfway through the prayer, I start feeling a little bit shameful. And so I don't end up having a wank. But like, so she was like, isn't the top drawer universal? Like, why would you go in there? Yeah. But then she had the realization that her and the real estate agent had this whole conversation about how some things had been moved. And the lady had said, you know, we put some things away.

We put some things in different spots. I think the real estate agent was trying to tell her. We saw. We saw. We saw the days. How many does she have? If we're talking, you said everyone she's ever owned. I think like four or five of them.

Yeah, she's got a bit of a collection. Yeah. Really? Wow. Bit of a Pokemon situation. Because I'm about to move, because we've got brand new side tables. Erin's made these side tables with our May. And I was like, I really just want to clarify the need for storage

on the underneath carriage part. I really just want to clarify we're going to need some storage down there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because mine's all in the bathroom at the moment. Okay, right. But it's in a there. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Because mine's all in the bathroom at the moment. Okay, right. But it's in a kit. Wait, so if you... If I'm in the mood, I've got to travel to

and then post travel back to. So Aaron all this time is just watching TV and he sees Hayley walk past with this like fishing tackle box of... Do, do, do, do, do, do. You just keep watching that movie, darling. She looks like the bad guy on the Bourne movies where she's going to take out a sniper rifle

and put it together. She's running away from police with a sniper bag on her back. Then dismantles it, takes a shot. Takes a shot. Dismandles it, puts it all away, puts it back in the bathroom. You've got to give it a wash. If this had happened 10 years ago, I'd be like,

oh my god, fucking mortifying. But I'm all about it now. Good. I can't about it now. Good. I can't imagine it's the first time she's ever had this. No. The photographer, I think, was male, though, so he might have been a little uncomfortable. Again, he would have seen this before. If it's not his first rodeo. Yeah.

100%. Yeah. Ah, well. Ah, well. Wow. Sex positivity, everybody. It's healthy. We got sent some sex stuff to work the other day.

Yeah. We were like, oh, no, you can keep that to the producers. Well, I went, got that, got that, got that. There wasn't anything really for the males. No, there wasn't. It was rubbish, wasn't it? There was one egg thing to put your penis into, but I didn't like the idea of putting my dick in an egg.

I'm not putting my dick in an egg. I'm not putting my dick in an egg. You guys are such fucking prudes. Put your dick in an egg. Oh, I put my dick in an Easter egg when I was a kid. an egg you guys are such fucking prudes put your dick in an egg oh I put my dick in an easter egg when I was a kid oh he's scarred

he's scarred born Ellen and I'm scarred but then Carwen said I just took a look at the office and gave the girlies some stuff

you know what's killing me who took what I can't ask I can't ask I can't ask but you know just in my head now

I'm like who took what you can't ask it was a little. I can't ask. I can't ask. But, you know, just in my head now, I'm like, who took what? You can't ask. No, it was a little awkward for me because I walked in and I went, because we have one male co-worker who was in there at the time, and I went, hey, girls. Oh, he didn't take the egg, did he? There's some. Oh, now we know he put his dick in the egg. No, no, I don't think he took it.

But I just went, oh, like, there's some things here if you want them. Yeah, it's weird, like, because most people walk in and they've got, oh, guys, I've got some feed showers from Matri. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, you know, Bronnie will take a couple of feed showers. We've been seeing a massive thing of donuts. Who wants one? Susan takes a couple.

But that's what I was going to say. One of the other male co-workers came into the room because he assumed that I was bringing in free food. And he was very shocked when it was not. And then took the big glass dildo and was like, yeah, that'll go on. Whatever. She made the end of the podcast.