ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 28th November 2023

Episode Date: November 27, 2023

On Today's Lil Bitta Pod; Hayley's eyeing up some Christmas accessories...See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Fleshborn and Hayley's Little Bit of Pod. Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Macca's rewards. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod. I would love to thank you for having me. You're right. What have you been going on? Thank you for having me.

You got a lot of lozenges. Yeah, I'm going to shit my pants. I've been eating a lot of lozenges. There's so many sweeteners in them. And nasal squirts. Not COVID yet. Okay, you've had a package arrive? I have had a package arrive.

One packet of Christmas napkins. Now, every year my mum would always buy Christmas napkins. Merry Christmas. Still waiting for your tree. You were away on the Disney Cruise, Vaughan. She went and bought a tree. She's got an eight-foot tree coming. Beautiful. Thank you.

Gorgeous. Thank you. Because Sade said to me, I think she even messaged you. Yeah, she did message me. She was like, are you buying a real one? And I said, no, I want one as fake as Pamela Edison's tits. And that really put a smile on her doll. She liked that. Yeah. Well, thank you. I'm a comedy gal. But my

mum always had a Christmas napkin, like you know, just like paper napkin but christmassy right and i'm doing a christmas dinner for my family so i was like i gotta get some paper napkins and so i ordered some they're expensive they're really nice they're nice nice but they were on sale paper yeah i've got no i've got linen napkins for the plate yeah but you know once they get a bit soiled right i might need a paper napkin so i just want to have those available but why don't you just get some red or green napkins from the supermarket? Just basic, bitch.

Because these are nice. They're like golden green, and they're really going to go with the colour theme of my table. So when does Aaron find out that you've bought this tree? On Christmas Day. No, surely you're going to put it up. Oh, the tree. I thought you meant the napkins. I was like, the napkins he shall not know.

Oh, yeah. Well, any day now, guess Yeah, it's not going to go down well It's not going to go down well No Because I literally said, wow, that tree's going to get more expensive You know, once the sales are over And he was like, well, you have to sell more shit And how's the selling of the stuff going?

Well, I've been busy This was the idea that you could have the tree, but you had to sell stuff. I'll sell stuff today, but I'm going to have to put a one day. Sucks. I know. Because of people. The people and the, like, what are the dimensions of the armpit? Name something that sucks.

What do you mean? Vacuum cleaner. Vacuum cleaners. No, no, no, like. That blows. That sucks. Blow jobs. Nouum cleaners. No, no, no, like... That blows. That sucks. Blowjobs. No, they're real.

Oh, you mean sucks as in, like, is bad. Yeah, yeah. Paper cups. I think you mean, like, actual physical sucking. Everything that sucks can be traced straight back to humans. Sunburn. Humans. No, that's the sun.

No, that's the sun. But we burnt the ozone layer. We're burning. We're the humans. Yeah, do you think that's why? You couldn't get burned if it wasn't for... Cues. Cues.

That's just a row of humans. That's the most human thing ever. Okay, what about large waves? What do you mean, at the beach? Yeah. Well, they don't suck. Some people like to ride them hang loose tents. They're only getting larger because of global warming.

Oh, okay. And I'll tell you who's at the foot of that problem. The dinosaurs. Humans. Moldy cheese. Humans. I wish God would step in and just fix climate change. Do you know what I mean?

Nobody gave us free will, you see. It would be uncool for them to step in at that stage. That's right. I forgot that little detail when I was flicking through the Bible. God's loophole. Free will. Free will. Anyway.

Anyway, napkins. I've got great napkins and they're really going to add through the Bible. God's loophole. Free will. Free will. Anyway. Anyway, napkins. I've got great napkins, and they're really going to add to the table. Right. God, you've gone all out with Christmas. I know. It's just my first sort of adult throwing a Christmas, and I just am so excited for it,

and this is who I want to be. I'm thinking of doing, you know how we've got the archway in our house in the middle? I'm thinking of incorporating that next year into Christmas, putting some leaves and lights and kind of a Christmas sort of – Some tacky tinsel? No, I'm not tacky tinseling. You've seen my house.

It's going to be a classy house. Some little cutout Santa clauses. We should take over some tinsel. If you tinsel my house, I will tinsel yours. Let's get some tacky lights for outside. I will get a jar of glitter if you tinsel my house and I tinsel yours Let's get some tacky lights For outside Yes I will get a Jar of glitter If you tinsel my house

And I'll blow it Through your carpet You've got to remember Don't forget It was 660 that said Don't forget your roots Rangiora And they would

Yeah I'm a Wellington I grew up in Eastbourne They love tinsel In Rangiora And Eastbourne They love tinsel there No they don't

Wash and scrub As hard as you can Lady Macbeth You can't get the The spots of Rangior or off those damn rungy or out i say