ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 10th November 2020

Episode Date: November 9, 2020

Bird of the yearTop 6: Gwyneth's BreadDublin Airport DrinksThe Morning MooFloodsYour first ever date?Bet I can guess your Mum's nameMegan's School speechFact of the DaySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Download the Maccas app to get McCafe rewards today. I'm looking at incredible footage of a man down in Napier Street riding a, what would you call that? A unicorn. A unicorn. It's a unicorn with wings, so it's a Pegasus. Right. Okay. Fantastic. Yeah. Like inflatable. Yeah. One of those big ones. Oh my God. I mean, you know, 3,000 homes without power as we record this. Many people have had severe flooding of their homes. Horrible times in Napier at the moment.

And those floodwaters aren't very trustworthy to be riding on a inflatable. No, I wouldn't recommend nipping into the floodwaters Plus you might get a wee stick in your Pegasus and then that's And then you're screwed Be on your deflating Pegasus in the middle of the street Where you're not sure how Dead the water is underneath And they were saying it moved manhole covers

And everything, dangerous You could just be walking along the road I remember whenever It flooded growing up. Oh, that is a fucking idiot right there. Is that like a Nissan or something? They've driven like right into the water. They drove.

And it kept getting. No, you should never drive into floodwaters either. Oh, my God. It was up to the bonnet. Whee. Oh, whee. No. Primera.

Looks like a Nissan Primera. That's going to do something bad to your engine right I mean if the insurance company is already paying out though Why not have one last hoon Well then you'd see that footage There's video footage there of the insurance company You're probably voiding your insurance there Okay fair call I always remember floodwaters at home

When we were kids it would flood and we'd be like Mum can we ride the inflatable Boat down the creek She'd be like, no We're like, you don't want us to have any fun Looking back on it now Maybe she was right She probably was ZM

Fleece, Vaughan and Megan The podcast Good morning, welcome to the show, Fleece, Vaughan and Megan Three minutes past six A lot of rain overnight Napier, feeling Good morning, welcome to the show, Fleetspawn and Megan. Three minutes past six, a lot of rain overnight. Oh, Napier, feeling. Friends at Napier that put up videos, it was like knee high and flowing down the street. So current state of emergency.

Yeah, localised state of emergency in the Napier area. In place there, yeah. Did you see that photo of that slip right up to someone's back doorsteps? Oh my God. I was like, oh. Was that at the bottom of the hill in town? Oh goodness me. I believe so, yeah. Sheesh.

Well, it's not only in Napier, our very own producer, Jarrod, he's also lost the first few pages of his first book of The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe series. He told me that was on the floor. At a flood, yeah. Flooded his house.

Good Lord. Flood everywhere, lots of rain. So I don't know, cleanups continue. What are you? Found that photo. Look, a large landslide swept away the back. Oh my God. So literally goes right up to their house.

Wow. Crazy. I would have put that on my Instagram story with the Dixie Chicks song, Landslide, as the musical accompaniment. Of course. When your house was about to be taken away by a landslide, you'd have time for it. You're on the gram.

An Instagram story and a topical fun title. But no. Yeah. And do you see people, people like stand up paddle boarding yeah and getting towed in there yeah I saw people driving

into deep water in cars that like they weren't those like a big Hilux with a snorkel on it they were driving like their Yaris's

into the street I was like oh you know this isn't Yaris territory I'd be too scared to do that my Yaris would get stuck I want your little too scared to do that. My Yaris would get stuck. Oh, your little Yaris getting stuck.

Oh, your Yaris getting stuck. The top six is coming up, and Gwyneth Paltrow is back with a bizarre new item for sale. What is her store called? Goop. Goop. This lamp is literally a loaf of bread hollowed out and dipped in resin to preserve it, and then popped over a light bulb and that's a lamp. And it's like calming because it's like a soft light, you know?

Would that not catch on fire? Or is the whole loaf of bread dipped in resin and that's fireproof? The whole loaf of bread is dipped in the resin, which would to a certain, and it must just be a low heat bulb. But you're right, it must have, there must be airflow in there, otherwise the bulb could get hot. But then would that be quite delicious to smell like toasty bread all the time? Yeah.

$210 US for the batard bread lamp. The what? The batard. Batard, it's a type of bread. B-A-T-R-D. B-A-T-A-R-D. God, I was thinking woodwork, they used to make us make one on the lathe. We could have just popped to the home ec room and made our own.

The top six other homewares made of bakery items is today's top six. All right. Next on the show, Bird of the Year. I think every year there's controversy with this. Oh, yeah, there is. There was the Russians meddling in our Bird of the Year competition a few years back. The Russians got involved.

Well, there's been a big endorsement for a particular bird in the Bird of the Year. Not since Tom Sainsbury, Snapchat comedian, endorsed the... Ketelu. As Paula Bennett. Yep. No, there's never been... This one's a big one, too.

Could it be the sway that this particular bird needs? All right, it's next. ZM. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM, Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Oh, it's happened. Finally fixed the end of that song. The entirety of the time we've been playing that song,

the end has never been right. There was a real fuss called, was it Friday? Yep. Good. It's good. It's done. You just had a tantrum in front of the boss. Threatening people's jobs to get things done.

That's happened. It's happened. Well, the Bird of the Year voting is open as well. That's happening. It has been going for just over a week now, and it ends on the 15th of November, the voting period for the New Zealand Bird of the Year. Previous winners include, from 2015, the bar-tailed godwit.

2016, the kokako. 2017 was the key year in the limelight. 2018, the kereru. And then last year, the yellow-eyed penguin. It just makes me realise how many years we've been talking about the Bird of the Year. I don't remember the Bartow Godwit year. Oh, no, I think we jumped on after that. Yeah, so 2016.

It may have even been running for longer, but those are the last five winners. But they're always controversy. Controversial. Yeah. Always, yeah. You can get pretty upset. It's pretty weird that the Kiwi hasn't won. One of the Kiwis hasn't won.

I've been contacted by the Royal Spoonbill Society. I do. To get behind the Royal Spoonbill. What's a Royal Spoonbill? It's this. I've got a photo of it here. It's a weird one. It's called a spoonbill because the end of its beak's got like a big...

It looks like a... It looks like a cartoon. I've never seen one of those and apparently it's doing okay like its status is doing okay right i always like to vote for the ones that are in serious trouble yeah me too because it brings a bit of light to their plight um so they've got a spatula bill apparently so they can dig up crustaceans and stuff huh and um it's got like oh it doesn't have a photo of it there but i didn't know that they can flare up their feathers behind their head like a little mini peacock yeah right behind their head so that's quite a cool is it right though

every year because every year it's a different bird, vastly different bird. There are people that campaign for certain birds. Well, that's what we're here to talk about because Adult Toy Megastore has thrown their weight behind the hee-hee. The hee-hee. The hee-hee. What is a hee-hee? I don't know, a little robin-y looking thing? Hee-hee. To look at, it's not the most, like, captivating bird.

It could probably be sat beside a sparrow and you'd be like, Oh, yeah. Right. No big deal. Well, why have they endorsed this bird? They have endorsed this bird because of its sexual prowess. Oh, okay. It's a little different to other birds.

It's testicles four times larger than birds comparable by size. Bird balls. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Are they on the outside of the body or? The balls. I'm not overly familiar with the anatomy of the.

Can I even Google that? He had testicles. They also like the fact that it makes love face-to-face rather than the standard. Oh, that's quite sweet. Yeah, so they look at each other right in the eye there. Yeah. And yeah, they're just out there sexually.

So I think that lines up with adult toy megastores. Good from them. Principles. Good bit of free publicity. Yeah, totally. Totally. And the hee-hee is in some trouble. Who's that?

So bringing some awareness to that. But I haven't been able to find it where its testicles are. Well, they should, if they really care, they should do a dollar from every dilly. A dollar for the dilly for the hee-hee? For the hee-hee. Yeah. And when you buy the special dillies, ae? For the hee. Yeah. And when you buy the special dillies,

a dollar goes towards the hee hee. Yeah, right. Or something like that. The hee hee. The hee hee. Okay. How's it spelled? H-E-E-H-I-H-I.

Apparently the hee hee also has a curved bill and long tongue that is used to reach deeply into flowers to brush for nectar to eat. There's no need to read that like that. You sexualized that. Right. I did, didn't I? You really did.

I didn't mean to, but it happened. And they've also photoshopped the bird with a series of sex toys. Whips. Right. I'm not even lying. Look, they photoshopped on nipple clamps. Even though birds don't have nipples. It's actually quite a pretty bird.

You made it sound like it was a sparrow. It is a pretty bird. It's got like a black, yellow and green. Oh yeah, but it's not like a, it's not like a, the New Zealand falcon or, you know, like a fantail or a, don't be birdist.

It's not even a rockhopper penguin. It's certainly not a care. I'm going to vote for it now because you've absolutely shamed it. It's no tomtit. That would have also been a good one for the adult toy megasquirt. Yeah, it would have been, yeah. Fleshfauna Megan, the podcast, ZM. From the smoggy ZM think tank, this is the top six.

Hello there. Reports that you can purchase a loaf of bread dipped in resin with some LED lights in it from Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop for $210 US. The batard bread lamp has a warm and soft light. It is made from bread flour, cake flour, salt, yeast, LED lights and a power cord with a dimmer switch. It's basically a fake bag soft light. It is made from bread flour, cake flour, salt, yeast, LED lights and a power cord with a dimmer switch.

It's basically a fake baguette. Yeah. On the website it says, the perfect gift for anyone with a sourdough starter or a love of whimsical home decor. You know that she takes the piss, eh? You need to watch that Goop series on Netflix. This definitely rings as

like, it's been a while since someone's discussed the wacky stuff we're selling. Yeah. Let's do it. Her and her designers just do this stuff for a bit of a laugh. But people still buy it. So who's the joke on? So you can buy it or they give you instructions. The first step towards making a lamp out of a loaf of bread is to make a loaf of bread.

The next step is to poke a hole in the loaf of bread. The hole should not be see-through. A thin layer of bread should remain on the hole. Wow. Cool. And then you've just got a dumb lamp. A stupid, dumb... How does it stand? Or is it meant to lie down? No, it's laying down.

It's laying down. It's just literally sat like you've got a loaf of bread beside your bed. I'd get bozed and try and eat it. Resin and all. I was going to say, if you hadn't resined it, you probably could, but it would go stale. Eventually, it would go mouldy too if you didn't resin it. But I've got the

top six other homewares made of bakery items for today's top six. Number six, the Chia Bata cup coaster. Okay. So you just make a sort of a flatter Chia Bata and you can sit your cup on it. But again, don't forget to resin

guys. Number five on the top six other homewares made of bakery items now this one goes really nicely with the chair barter cup coaster is the pita placemat it's a pita bread but it's big and you can use it

to stop your plate sitting directly on your wooden table but again don't forget to resin always resin when you resin though, because the pita's quite up and down, it's quite wavy, it wouldn't be straight.

Your plate might start sliding off a bit. I reckon you dip in resin and then sit on a flat surface so the resin maybe did the flatness. Yeah, okay. Provided the underneath flatness. Number four on the list of the top six other homewares made of bakery items,

the baguette bathroom. That means the entire bathroom's made of baguettes. Baguettes, okay. Baguette tiles. Yes, baguette bath, baguette taps. Lovely. Yeah, and all that water's really going to test the resin. Really test your resins.

Maybe want to double resin on that one. Number three on the list of the top six other homewares made of bakery items, the sourdough sofa. It's a really big sourdough. Could be like a beanbag-esque size. Right. Yeah. Pre-resin? Sit in it so it goes to your

shape. So it moulds. Then resin. Okay. Then resin. But you're resin in the outside. Wouldn't the inside still go... You'd think so. But it'd still go mouldy, the outside. Wouldn't the inside still go... You'd think so. But it'd still go mouldy, eh? Yeah. Not enough for it to take your weight.

Oh. Well, it wasn't personally directed at you. I was just meaning in general. I feel like it was. Any ones. I feel like it was. Number two, one for the kids to play with on the other homewares made of bakery items, the Focaccia Frisbee.

Okay. Throw that around. Yeah. Resin is very important there. And number one on the list of the top six other homewares made of bakery items, the rye bread rumba. That's where you have a rumba and you bake

like a, what of a cob loaf situation of the rye and then hollow out the bottom and then sit it on top of your rumba. Imagine your robot vacuum cleaner looks like a loaf of bread. A little loaf of bread scooping around. I'm here for that.

That sounds great. It could totally work. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. I think we need a bit of joy this morning with all the rain we've had around the country. Yeah. Flooding in parts. A bit of a smile.

Silver lining. Yep. Auckland's water, the dams are up to 71.9%. Oh my God, can I leave the hose on now? No. Oh. Actually, I don't have a hose, but I can just leave it. I'll leave the kitchen sink on if I'm finally allowed.

Just to make sure that it's got lots of water in it. Sure. Leave the sink on. I just want to see if I can get it to 69. Nice. Nice. Nice. Now to Ireland where restrictions

are in place for lockdown, meaning the pubs can't be open. I've only heard too much about, like you always hear about the UK.

Yeah. And England have gone into a month lockdown. But what's the story in Ireland? Do you know? It's Ireland. Very similar. Very similar.

Very similar. And apparently the... Oh, yes. Yeah. Look at that graph. When did that peak? That was peaking around mid-October. Right.

Like 1,000 cases a day. But at the moment, there are 500. It's been teetering off. 500. Apparently, they had a situation a bit like... Now, is that Northern Ireland or... That's entire. Entire Ireland.

Entire Ireland. But yeah, the Northern Ireland is the problem area. Right. They've got a bigger bubble. Right. Map of cases. Probably got denser population too. But yeah, I was talking to someone whose family's in Ireland

and they said their little village was like everybody kind of isolated to their villages and then one person went overseas and came back with it and just infected the entire village. So they've had the odd case of like super spreaders and stuff. But I would have thought with isolation to the point where the pubs are shut, but apparently because they're in the EU, travel has always been a bit easier to travel between the EU countries. Right.

Apparently that may be why the airport's still open. Yeah. The pubs are shut. However, the airports are open, so people are buying very cheap flights and then going to the pub, not even catching their flights, but having access to the bars. Because, you know, like Ryanair, you get like a five-pound flight to wherever, ten pounds.

That's your entry into the bar, isn't it? These are ten-euro flights. Yeah. So they go there and they have a few beers and then just go home. Don't ever end up catching the flight. So Dublin Airport has been classed as an essential service and has to stay open despite level five lockdown restrictions in Ireland. Wow, they've got a level five.

They've got a level five. They've really upped it. So they can stay open. So people have been going to, I mean, this defeats the whole purpose of isolating and sort of quarantining yourself. And it's these sort of situations that end up dragging it out, especially airports. They're kind of like a hotspot for the virus. But how are the bars still open? Like I get the airport.

Why aren't they shut? I guess it's like a restaurant, but those kind of restaurant bars. Yeah. And they're open. So they're like, well, yeah, we'll serve beer. And the restaurant's not going to say anything, are they? No. Because they're making money.

Yeah. So one of the few places open that we happen to be trading, I'm guessing. I do love a loophole, though. I love it when someone finds a loophole. Well, they found it, but it's going to be shut. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

ZM. The Morning Moon. Going to be sharp. Let's hear from the boss Taurus. That's the scientific name for the domestic cow. Is it? Let's hear from the domestic cow on the show this morning. Well, the morning moo, how it works is if you're a farmer and right now you're with your cows, you call us on 0800 DALZATM

and if you just got to get your cow to moo. And then we get real stoked. Not like a full-blown roar. No. We've had a... It's harder than it sounds. And the calves give us a... They're hungry.

All right, well, let's start with Janelle. Good morning, Janelle. You're in the Waikato Morning How are you? Good, yourself? Good, thanks You can probably hear the bulls going to the girls

Oh yeah Oh you can, that's a roaring bull You got the bulls back in the herd, have you? Yeah, yeah Yeah, alright You finished AB for the season, you, have you? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, all right. This is when you finished AB for the season. You're just catching up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Filling the blank spots with the bull. No one knows what that means, apart from farmers. I love that you also, you put on your real, like, blokey farmer voice. Oh, yeah. All right, so Janelle, can we get a morning move from you, from your cows? Probably not a move from the cows, but from the bulls.

Okay, all right. We did have a moo, but that's not a moo, though, is it? It is a moo. It's a moo for you? It's a man moo. Yeah, it's a moo. All right, okay. It's a man cow moo.

Okay. It's like the man flu. It's the man moo. Okay. Okay. Okay. cow moo okay it's like the man flew it's the man moo okay okay okay should we get what did you do it was so good your phone like maxed out it was the phone was like, maxed out. The phone was, like, too much. That was good. Janelle, I think that's the best one we've ever had. All right, Janelle, thank you.

Let's go to Dana in the Bay of Plenty. Good morning, Dana. Good morning. Good morning to you. In fact, we should adopt that. We should say that. Good morning. Dana, we actually met you at Banger's Bingo, didn't we?

You did. Yes. Right there in the Bay of Plenty. And you said, I want to take part in the morning move. Well, now's your chance, Dana. Now's my time to shine. All right. No pressure. Dana's cows don't let us down.

I know, right? Right. Here we go. Hello, I'm Staker. Hey, girls. Hey, girls. Hey, girls. Oh, man. Oh, oh.

Do you hear that? No. Oh, Dana. Do they usually reply to you when you say, hey, girls? Some of them. Come on, girls. Hey, girls. Hey, girls.

Oh, man. Oh, Dana. Do you even have cows? No. That's very quiet. Dana, are you lying to us? Come on girls Hey girls Oh man Do you even have cows? Dana are you lying to us? There's no cows are there Dana? You were just trying to be cool My cows are just so dang happy That's what's going on That wasn't mine was it?

No Dana hey thank you for playing with your fictitious cows. He just really wanted to get on. I know. That was great. And, well, she gave us our new introduction. Yeah, good moaning.

Richard, good moaning. Good moaning. How are you? Good moaning to you, Richard. Fantastic. Now, you're in the lovely Oamaru with its lovely old stone buildings. Is it true that all the cows in Oamaru have to be dressed up in steampunk? It's not.

I don't know if they'd do it too well, actually. Right, no, they wouldn't like the jangly metal helmets. All right, well, Richard, when you're ready, give us a morning move from your cows. Right, I hope they're not as nervous as me. Okay. Come on. I think they are are They're a bit

Shy What was the Ticka ticka ticka ticka ticka ticka ticka thing Was that I'm trying to coax them into thinking They're getting more food Classic So then they're like

Where's the food Richard That's the equivalent of shaking the The whiskers box Yeah Yeah But have you had You already fed them Richard Where's the food, Richard? That's the equivalent of shaking the whiskers box. Yeah. Whisk, whisk, whisk, whisk. Yeah. But have you had, you already fed them, Richard? Yeah, well, down here in Oamaru, I think we just fed them too well, actually.

Yeah, I was going to say, we can't expect everyone just to starve their cows. We're already waiting for this to start. Brilliant. Richard, thanks for playing, much like Dana. Probably doesn't have cows there. No. Just a second. Bye, all. Cheers, thanks for playing. Much like Dana. Probably doesn't have cows there. No. Cheers, guys. Yeah, no, cheers, Richard.

Thanks, mate. He said he was nervous. Not bad, though. Maybe the cows can, like, feel the nerves. You know? Yeah, maybe. Not bad. One move from three.

Pretty much how it goes. Very hard to get cows to move. Yeah. It's not an easy radio competition. It's not like getting a dog to bark. Mind you, that can be hard too. It all depends on your dog, doesn't it? But when it works, it feels pretty good.

Yeah, what a good moo-ning. Good moo-ding. That's another edition of the Morning Moo. Are we still going to keep doing this? Yeah, maybe. This is generally decided if we're going to do this in about five minutes to six when there's a big blank spot

in what we can do in the show. We're like Chuck in the morning, though. That old chestnut. Well, there's great news. Pfizer, who is the drug company, they have said that the COVID-19 vaccine is looking 90% effective. This is big news out of the US today.

Wow. I'll have a vaccine and two stiffy pills. Thanks, Pfizer. Because they do stiffy pills too, don't they? Yeah, they do lots of stuff. They might be able to do a combo. What does Pfizer do Viagra? That was their...

Oh, I don't know. I think they did. Right, okay. Well, anyway, Vaughan, the great news, you can take care of your stiffy pills on your own time. But yeah, the great news is that... Yeah, Viagra is Pfizer's stiffy pill. Well, maybe they could do a combo.

They reckon they'll have enough doses by the end of the year to immunise 15 to 20 million people by the end of the year. Fantastic. That's like a month, That's six weeks away. So that's like, that'll be your most at risk kind of people as well. So good. Well, speaking of COVID, that's where we hint into who has pulled out of TV personality of the year.

Ashley Bloomfield. Dr. Ashley Bloomfield. Well, can we get the sign language people in? Yeah, sure. Yeah. To the hearing impaired community, they were the ones delivering the message. I always thought they just did such a phenomenal job up there.

So, although he is humbled to be nominated for this year's TV Awards, given his primary role as a public servant and not a TV personality, he would like to step aside from being considered from the award, but he wishes all the candidates well and says he'll be watching with interest on the night. No, but look how annoying. I've gone to the website. Look how annoying this is now. Oh yeah, there's

all lots of two. Uneven column! There's an even number and he's pulled out. Yeah, you're right. They do need one more person there, don't they? Put them in. Hilary Barry are we stoked though. She's got this in the bag. Now. She does now, yeah.

She does now. Even though I think she said she voted for Ashley. What happens to all the votes that Dr. Ashley got? I think they just go. Null and void. Null and void, yeah. Like anybody that voted for Advance or the new Conservatives in this election for New Zealand. Null and void. Wasted vote. You might as well have thrown it in the bin.

Yeah, okay. So you reckon Hillary's got it now? I reckon Hillary's got that in the bag. Can't go wrong with a bit of hillbaz. He's so humble, though. Ashley Bloomfield doesn't want a big fuss made. Do you think someone was like, oh, it's not a good look? Or do you think that was a call he made?

No, I reckon it was a call he made. Who would have, it's not a good look? Or do you think that was a call he made? No, I reckon it was a call he made. Who would have said it's not a good look? Oh, just take it. Like he doesn't like the fuss. He's done interviews where he said he gets like quite nervous and anxious even just doing press conferences. But we want to make a fuss. What if we want to make a fuss? But he doesn't want a fuss made. Okay.

When's his birthday? We'll make him a real big cake. Oh yeah. Do we know when his birthday is? We'll send a cake to the Ministry of... Is that where he's based? Ministry of Health? Yep. We'll just send it to a hospital.

He is such a sexy man of mystery. You need not find it. It says Ashley Robin Bloomfield. Yeah. Born 1965, 1966. He is a man of mystery. No, this is on his Wikipedia page. No, like, hard and fast Dr. Ashley Bloomfield date of birth.

Right. Write that down on a list of things to ask the Prime Minister. Oh, no, because he won't do an interview with us, will he? We've asked, like, 50 times. We'll ask Jacinda. Yeah, I don't even think she'd know. Can we make, what's that thing where you make a public request for information? Oh, yeah.

Yeah, we use the Official Information Request Act. Yeah. I mean, I don't think we should be burning through the Ministry of Health's important time when they're battling a... But it's a quick one. It's not a take two. It's a quick one. It's a quick fire an email to Ashley, then give us the info.

Yeah. Just so we can send him a birthday cake. And make a fuss on his birthday when he's allowed to accept info. Yeah. Just so we can send him a birthday cake. And make a fuss on his birthday when he's allowed to accept it. Yeah. Okay. Alright. Well, the mayor has called a state of emergency in Napier

today after flooding and landslips. Yeah. She was all go, I don't exactly know how many millimetres of rain fell. Oh, okay, here we go. Napier Airport showed more how many millimetres of rain fell. Oh, okay, here we go. Napier Airport showed more than 110 millimetres of rain fell in the city between midnight on Sunday and 8pm yesterday, 100 of which fell between 12 and 8pm.

So eight hours, that's a phenomenal amount of rainfall. Yeah. In a month. I mean, you saw people stand up paddle boarding, being towed behind cars, wakeboarding. Yeah. Cars floating down. cars, wakeboarding. Yeah. Cars floating down. Oh, my God.

Cars were seen floating as well. Brave Toyota Yaris's being like, I can do it. And driving into deep water and maybe not doing it. Maybe not faring so well today. Yeah. Now, you might want to check with your school if you've got kids at school because some schools will be shut today. Not all, but some.

And the council was also forced to discharge wastewater. Yeah. In some parts as well, which have prompted warnings. Obviously about water quality and getting sick there. Because they were saying yesterday and last night just to think twice before flushing. Yeah, right. Because you might be flushing into. Yeah.

Well, and just when there's that much water in the waste water, even with the discharge there, it can become problematic. Yeah, right. So if you didn't need to flush it,

but I think today, check. What is the, if it's yellow, let it mellow. If it's brown, flush it down. Yeah, that could be a good one to live by today.

Yeah, if it's brown, just put a heaps of toilet paper on top. Yeah. And then draw paper on top. Yeah. And then draw a wee on top. Fire an emergency responding to 150 calls as well, I guess, over the last wee period. So, yeah, it's crazy amounts of rain there.

Yeah, like manhole covers were lifted off as well. So there was that danger of the water hiding a whole lot of dangers. Yeah. The water was so intense that, yeah, the manhole covers were lifted off. And then, obviously, if people were running through there or walking through knee-deep water, they could all of a sudden be in neck-deep or even deeper water if they fell in one of those holes.

Civil Defence as well is warning people about doing a smithy and rubbernecking because you'd love a rubberneck going for a nosy. So don't be driving around having a nosy in these areas. Also, it rained in a lot of places yesterday very heavily. Producer, Jared, I reckon you should chuck that photo on our Instagram of your ranch loader acting as a transparent water dam. Oh, yep, can do.

I've never seen. So to describe it, the rain was running off the road down the driveway. Down the downhill driveway, hitting my flatmate's ranch lighter, and we could just see it like pulling up, like damming up. How high did it get? It got over our knees. Whoa. Yeah, so we were out there.

Because it got into your flat, didn't it? Oh, the whole downstairs is swamped. Yeah. So in your bedroom, how deep was the water? It was maybe a centimetre above the carpet. So in my room, it wasn't too bad. Cameron's room, my flatmate, you walk on this carpet. Poor Cameron.

And it's like you're walking on a waterbed. Like the carpet lifts and parts. Oh, no. Yeah, it's so bad. It's not your house walking on a waterbed. Like the carpet lifts and parts. Oh, no. Yeah, it's so bad. It's not your house, though. No. That's all my stuff, though. Yeah, that's true.

Because did you get it off the floor? Yep. We got pretty much everything off the floor. One of my books got a bit wet, which I'm sad about, but that's all right. Got the TVs, PlayStations up, high ground. The important things. All the TVs, PlayStations up, high ground. The important things. All the electrics are going. So basically Cam and I were playing games

and then we got a bit salty at each other, so we turned the games off and then he was like, oh my God, bro, come look. And I'd like stick my head into his room just in time to see this wave of water smash into his ranch slider. And we're there like moving stuff around. We hear this like cracking and we're like, oh my god

the window's about to break, but it was just hail hitting the window. Oh my god. And then other two flatmates come home and we get buckets and we're just bailing water out the driveway and it's just flooding down. Oh guys, I was so stressed. You need some sandbags on standby.

Yeah. What have the landlords said? They're just like, oh, no, she's right. Leave a window open. That carpet will dry out. Yeah. So we called them as it was happening, and they're like, oh, yeah, okay. We'll send a plumber around tomorrow. And we're like, the house is going to be underwater tomorrow.

Oh, my gosh. So, yeah, plumber's coming around this morning. That's pretty much all we got from the landlord. You need some new carpets yeah you need a plumber yeah wow well crazy yeah after his house um there's a uh business called kiwi corner dairy now they ship um like kiwi snacks like chocolate loll, chippies, and Kiwi condiments to Kiwis living overseas. And they have noticed a huge surge in, I guess, orders since COVID. Okay.

And since borders have shut. I would have thought they would have been down because so many Kiwis came home. Well, yes, but also they're not coming home just for a holiday to see family for a couple of weeks. So, you know, they are stuck overseas and they are ordering. And what do you think the most ordered Kiwi snacks are? Peanut slab. Marmite.

No, they had marmite over there, but it's different, eh? The most wanted. You were right with one of them. Peanut slab. Peanut slab. What's the number one? Come on. Tim Tams.

No. Is it chocolate related? Yes. Pineapple lumps. Yes. Is it? Pineapple lumps and peanut slabs. Also, followed by Cadbury's chocolate fish,

Whittaker's hokey pokey mini chocolates, and this is a weird one. Whittaker's hokey pokey mini chocolates. Bluebird chicken chops. Oh, yuck. Sorry, Alce. Yeah, I mean, it's only slightly better than Reddy Salty. They've got chicken flavoured chips other places in the world, don't they?

Exactly. And really not that. I don't know if I've had those hokey pokey things. I'm just looking at them now. Are they those little square ones? They're like a teeny tiny, no, they're like a teeny tiny slab. Yeah. And not slab, but with hokey pokey in it.

Oh, I don't think I've had one of those either. Like a teeny tiny. Yum. Yeah. Okay, I didn't even know these existed. Well, the Kiwi Corner Dairy has noticed a 60% surge in business since

last year. This time last year. Yeah. Right. People being like, I'd love to come home, but I can't. Yeah, basically. And mum being like, I'll send you a little pack. They've noticed a lot of orders from Melbourne especially. Right.

And they said one person got $1,000 worth of Marmite, a New York customer. Oh, my. $1,000 worth of Marmite. That sounds like a distribution. Yeah. If you're caught with that much Marmite on you, by the police, you're considered a distributor, not just a user. Yeah. That's when you get in trouble.

Yeah. Somebody also, another order for North America, 28 packets of chips from Kiwi brands like Bluebird and Copper Kettle and Burger Rings, stuff like that. Can they guarantee the bag's not going to be popped by the time it gets there? Well, they said one person spent $300 on shipping because that's the other thing. Shipping is not cheap at the moment,

especially from the bottom of nowhere where we are. Right, but if they're quarantined and they're not allowed to go out and they've saved themselves that much money anyway, they might have been burning a little hole in their pocket. I'd 100% do this. For the right snacks. Yeah. I'd miss the reduced cream onion soap dip.

I'd miss that. Of course you would. Because I've seen that in one of those Kiwi Care Packs, but surely you can get that, you can get the ingredients elsewhere, right? You can get reduced cream somewhere, right? I used to have to take that to my friend in Melbourne, and then her flatmates would always make the onion soup. We're like, no one makes the soup.

That soup packet is not for soup. Well, then make a soup. Yeah, with the onion soup. No. No, no one's having an onion soup. I don't think any of those soup packets are for soup. Aren't they always like for putting in something? They're always like putting in the crock pot.

No one's making soup. No one's making soup with those sachets. Gravy in that. Add it to madness. Come on! Soup's just there because you can't just call it packet for putting in stuff. Onion for things. Tomato for the crock pot and stuff.

Onion flavour for stuff. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Our nephew had a couple of questions. How old is said nephew? Nine. Nine. And he wanted to know how to get a girlfriend. Now, we were like, is this out of the blue or is there a special someone in mind?

And he does have someone in mind. So he wants to know how to get her to like him and how you get from that point to having a girlfriend. So I kind of sat back and was like, off you go, Andy P. This is up to you. So it was very cute because she's, I don't want to throw him too much under the bus. He'll remain nameless, but she's a little bit older. Really? Oh, so Andy P was the man to talk to then.

Oh, you want to score an older bird? Yeah, well, you've come to the right guy. But his advice was to, and this is also a classic, make some baking and maybe get mum to drop it off in her letterbox with a wee note. What? That's full noise. Is it? That's really full on.

Yeah, that's full on. For a nine-year-old. Some little cookies. Some cookies turned up as the father of a nearly nine-year-old. If some cookies stand up in the middle of the box, I'd be like, we don't eat those. Yeah. We don't know what's in those.

What if they were really yum? Were they made in a commercial kitchen? No, they're going straight in the bin. Like, would you even tell your daughter that they arrived? No. No. But he also said, and then, okay, so say that works.

Yeah. And we start talking, like, where do we go? Wait, so he's not even talked to this girl. I reckon he might want to try that before the cookies. They know each other.

Right. But it's not like good friends or anything like that. So he wanted to know what the next step was. Like, what do you do for a date? Where do you go? Well, you're nine, mate.

You're nine, are you? Go to the playground. Stop being a dad. You can't just say no because he wants to know and he's confiding in you. But he's not, like, going to go on a specific date. Like, they might sit together at lunch. Do they go to school together? I don't know.

She's not a college, is she? He's really short. She's like 15. He's like 9. It's never going to work. But we were like, well, maybe like an ice cream, get an ice cream together. That's so cool. Who's paying for the ice cream? He's got

pocket money. He can pay. Is he going out unattended to get ice cream? Oh, no, like someone can like maybe chaperone and hide in the bush or something. Right. But like we were like, maybe youended to get ice cream? Oh, no. Like, someone can, like, maybe chaperone and hide in the bush or something. Right. But, like, we were like, maybe you can go get ice cream together. You can ask, like, what her favourite flavour is. And I was, like, dying on the inside.

This is so cute. But he's never been on a date before. So, literally didn't know. Of course he hasn't been on a date before. Just stop being dead in this. He's interested. So, you've got to he hasn't been on a date before. Just stop being dad in this. He's interested. So you've got to like humour him a little bit. I can't wait until your daughters start dating.

And Megan and Nike just revel in the joy. But I was wondering, because that was super cute and got me real tickled. If you remember your first date, not like official one when you're, you know, like older at high school and stuff, but like you remember your first cute date you had. What, like at lunchtime and then, or like morning tea break and then by lunchtime you were over. You got together at playtime and lunchtime.

You bought her a Juicy from the canteen. You got rocky at lunchtime and after school you'd broken up. Yeah. She didn't buy you a Juicy at lunchtime. Yeah. I remember having, inviting, I really liked this boy. How old were you? Oh, it must have been like six or seven.

And I invited him over. You really liked a boy at six or seven? Yeah. And I invited him over and we had a pretend tea party. You invited him to your house? Yeah. But at six and seven, that's like a play date, right? Yeah, but I thought he was pretty cool.

And so we had a pretend tea party. What did you have in the teapot? It was pretend. There was nothing in there. But you have water in the teapot. Oh, I might have had water. Why are you poo-pooing on this? Stupid.

Whatever happened to him now? He's married with children. Right, okay. Not to me, obviously. Go to a society and keep that quiet if you had. I don't think he was interested in anything. But I remember this tea party. It's because he turned up at your house and you were like

we're having a tea party. Like me. No, there was years of me trying actually and it just never really went anywhere. Right, okay. Yeah. But I would love to know what your first date, or the first date that you remember, what happened. It was always at school.

I remember them happening at school. Yeah. Because that was the only time you could date. You at school. Yeah. Because that was the only time. You could date. You could date. On lunchtime, on the lunch break. It'd be like a picnic. Someone went on a little picnic down in the tree area. Yeah.

How cute is that? It's a little bit cute. Somebody said he needs to find out if she's gluten-free or vegan. Maybe ice cream's not the best option for your nephew there. If he's going to take it. Gelato. She's just too scared to say she's got a dairy allergy. Yeah.

You don't want your first date as a nine year old to be. Rushing them to the emergency room. Or having to administer the EpiPen. Yeah. So 0800 DALS at M 9696. Give us a call or a text now. Tell us about your first ever date. How cute was it?

What did you do? Maybe it was on the school lunch break. Yeah. On the playground. I don't know. How bad was it? Or maybe, hey, maybe you're still together. Maybe you're high school or like primary school sweethearts to this day.

0800 DALES.M. Give us a call. 9696 to text. Our nephew has asked for dating advice and where to go on a first date. And he's nine. He is nine.

Scott is talking about your cute first dates that you can remember. Somebody said I was at primary school. I think it was the last year of primary school. Me and my best friend

double dated a couple of cuties. We took them to McDonald's for tea. We paid. And then back to one of the girls' houses for a movie. Oh, okay. Cute. I would have been watching them like a hawk. This is giving you a conniption.

I just won't happen. There were no tea and movie. There were no tea and movie. Five years old and asked to go and got asked to go ice skating after school. The date lasted all of five minutes as I kept falling over and cried and demanded to be taken home. When I was in year seven, we were going out. I went to his house and we played a computer tennis game. It was an old computer tennis game.

And then we kissed in the cupboard. In the cupboard. He made me lunch. It was so sweet. I still remember it. I know what he made for lunch. Pretty bloody good marmite and chip sandwich, I reckon. Charlotte, what was your first date that you can remember? So I was

going, like I was 14, so I was a little bit older. This was like my first day and we decided to go to the movies because that's the only thing you do when you're 14. Yep. But the only movie that was really on at the moment

was The Hobbit, which is three and a half hours. Oh, yeah. I hadn't even seen, like I did not care about The Hobbit, but I was so awkward, so I like wouldn't look at him for the entire movie.

I was so terrified that he would like try to like hold my hand or, I don't know, kick me or anything. Like I was just so terrified the entire movie. I was so terrified that he would like try to like hold my hand or I don't know kiss me or anything like I was just so terrified the entire time. Literally I was so stressed for three hours and his mum waited in the mall the entire three and a half hours.

And yeah it was just so awkward. And then afterwards you're like thanks boy. Yeah no I just was like so not interested. I broke up with him over text a week later. Wow, okay. My first and only relationship thus far.

Has it tarnished the literal stylings of Tolkien for you? You haven't watched any more of them? I didn't for ages, but I actually watched Lord of the Rings for the first time this year, and I actually liked it, so I'll give it another shot. Oh my God, you should check out The Hobbit then. Yeah, I was like,

well, definitely I won't be able to watch it without being horribly reminded of how it is. Very awkward watch. Brilliant, Charlotte, thanks for your call. Ellie, what was your first ever date? Hi, my name, okay, my name's Ellie. And my first date was when I was seven.

Yeah. And me and this kid called Denim went into this little shaded teepee area and everyone was hanging around us because, you know, that's what you do. Yeah. And they looked at us and they said, I dare you to kiss, like,ck on the cheek, a hundred times. And I said, challenge accepted. A hundred times.

A hundred times before the break was over. And the teacher saw us. I think I was at like 98 and I finished. And then the teacher saw us and then pulled us into another room during class and then told us we were kissing too much and that we couldn't date anymore. Oh! So they made you break up. You're kissing too much so you have to break it up.

You were like, yeah, a hundred times in one play lunch. Ellie, thanks for your call. Alicia, what happened on your first date? Well, let me set the scene for you. Okay. I was nine. He was nine. I lived closer towards Raglan and he lived in Hamilton. So there's a bit of a drive there.

So I invited him all the way over to feed the lambs their last meal. Their last meal till they went to the paddock, not till they went to the slaughterhouse, by the way. That's why I have a date. We're going to feed these and we're going to slaughter them straight afterwards. Yes, yes.

No, we're okay here. So he comes over and I must be a little bit nervous and a little bit showy off, you know, as nine-year-olds are. And I spilt the milk all over the bench. And they didn't get their last meal. And he didn't get a great great fun nine-year-old date and I'm single now at 30, so spoiler alert, you know.

This is what I'm always, be careful with the milk powder. Yeah, definitely. I live by that. Yeah, day to day I live by that. You get a funnel now and you put the lid on tight and you give it a shake.

Brilliant, Alicia. Thanks for your call. Some more text messages. My first date was on the school mat in year two. So what's that, six? Yeah. We were supposed to walk to the hall together for assembly. She stuck her hand out to hold mine and I was too shy to hold hands.

So I walked alone and then we got there and her friend told me I was dumped. Wow. You've got to look out after your fellow sister. Yeah. When I was in daycare, I had a date with this boy called Felix. We heard to have playdates all the time. We had to have playdates all the time when we were obsessed with each other. We would go out with our parents

and get an ice cream and one time he asked his mum if he could take me to the zoo as he knew I loved going to the zoo. He moved back to France when we were like six. Oh, Felix. Come back, Felix. What did they even say

in touch? I don't know. Find Felix. Real romance. Find Felix. This could be a Netflix show. Yeah. Oh, that's really sad. That's, yeah.

He knew those French men, though. They know what women want, don't they? See that? Trinidad and Zoon and ice cream. Hello. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Hey, you on the phone.

I bet I can guess your mum's name. Okay, I've definitely got a mandarin seed lodged in the back of my throat. Do you want some water? I actually thought you were choking. No, it's fine. Like, I can still speak, but it's still there. Why don't they advertise the mandarins as having seeds in them? Definitely, I know.

I thought we were past that. Like, mandarins or seeds are okay if your friend's like, I've got a tree. No, but you can see because it's not those easy pill ones. Those easy pill ones have no seeds. What if this is how I die? A mandarin seed. I wouldn't be surprised at how many Mandis you hoover. I just love a Mandy.

The tabby odds of that's the way you die, that's not. Very high. I tell you what, it's not the favourite, though. Pass off. Sarah, good morning. Welcome to I Bet I Can Guess Your Mum's Name. Good morning. Thank you for the glass of water, producer Jared.

Now, Sarah, Vaughan is going to ask you five questions about your mum and then has 15 seconds to try and guess her name. Okay. Hi. I was just writing down a few. We were just talking about some people, so I wrote down their names just because it felt like they could all be, like, good mum's names. Okay.

You all right? I think it's gone, but I can't be sure. Oh, my God. Can you see it? No, also, you put your tongue up. No, I can't see anything. Okay, I think it's gone. Carry on.

Still feels like it's there, though. Finally, that's more of the noise that's associated with your death, favourites of the TAB. But anyway, sorry. Sorry, Sarah. Sorry to have... All right. Here's some questions about your mum.

What's your mum's favourite TV show? Coronation Street. Oh, okay. Okay, that puts her in a good demo there, doesn't it? Yeah. Although we've got a friend that loves Coronation Street and she's young. I'm writing down her name. Yeah.

Our friend that likes. Rachel loves a bit of Kyrie, doesn't she? Yeah, Rachel's on the list. Don't tell us if that's Your mum's name yet I'm also putting down Deirdre Because that's

That's That's a name Okay Okay I shouldn't be giving away My secrets No Number two

What's your mum's Go to wine Sarah Hi Sarah What's your mum's Go to wine Go to wine Go to wine Sarah. Hi, Sarah. What's your mum's go-to wine? Go-to wine. Go-to wine. Turn the radio down.

Turn that radio off. It's going to be off. Turn that radio off. Something that is red. Oh, she's gone. We've just lost her. What was going on there? Was it a whole kerfuffle?

What was going on there? Can we get to... We're just going to try and get Sarah back. Should we maybe try someone else? Just an update on the Just an update on the mandarin seed. I think it's gone. It's dislodged. Which is fantastic. We were all very

worried. Yeah, but glass of water there. Lodge that down. What's that? What happened there? I just heard the bong, which normally means the line's cut off. Yeah, but glass of water there. Lodge that down. What's that? What happened there? I just heard the bong, which normally means the line's cut off. Yeah. I'm just taking this time to write down some names of people who aren't great with technology. That's a mum's

right. Okay. She may have had a flat battery. Was it a flat battery? It's engaged. She's trying to call us. Maybe that's a bit of a classic. She's trying to call us. We're trying to call her. Okay, well, we'll try one more time and then we're just going to have to go to somebody else. It's ringing.

It's ringing. I'm just being told it is ringing. She's having a... Sarah. I mean, the nation's waiting. Why did you call reception? Well, Anya said it was ringing, but it was ringing reception because she forgot to dial one to get out.

God, it's one of those mornings, isn't it? Now I'm going to write down the reception lady's names. It's not their fault. Well, some of those are niche. I know. Yeah, okay. Yeah, I know. Maybe I'll just do one or two then.

Okay, I believe it's, yep, we've got Sarah. I believe we've got Sarah there. Here we go. Sarah, what happened? I have no idea. My phone just dropped out. And then I was like, I can't hear anything. And then I turned the radio up and you're going, hello.

Yeah. Wow, Sarah. And you just left. All right, now, Sarah, we were at the question, what is your mum's favourite wine? Well, she likes a good Lindau. Ooh, okay. You said something red before,

and now you've changed your mind to Lindau. It's red. She'll like a red if it's going, but if we have any special occasions, she'll always pull out the Lindau. Lindau's pretty posh. My mum's more of an Aquila. Remember Aquila?

It was like a $6 bottle of buzz. Who would have sworn that? I don't know if that exists, does it? I'll have more of an Aquila. Remember Aquila? It was like a $6 bottle of buzz. Who used to have that? I don't know if that exists, does it? I'll have a look. Aquila. I'm writing down some people's names that I know. You're not very snappy this morning. No, I'm just...

Yeah, no, it's still around, Aquila. Aquila is it. Sparkling Wine launched in 1997. Now New Zealand's number one selling sparkling wine, which exemplifies fun, vitality and excitement. Boom, number one. And only because it's $6 a box. Don't you fool yourself.

Does your mum host Christmas? Actually, $10.99 if I can correct you. Oh my God, inflation. In the Koila market. Does your mum host Christmas? She does normally, yeah. She likes to be in control? Yeah.

Okay. What kind of car does your mum drive? She likes to be in control. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Mm-hmm. What kind of car does your mum drive? A Toyota Corolla, but it's quite new. Oh, look, it's a nice new Toyota Corolla. Yeah, yeah. Sensible, though. Off the lot, off the lot.

Okay. Did she? Yeah. She bought a brand new, brand new. So she's a baller. She's a baller. I'm trying to think of a couple of ballers I know that are driver. Okay. And what are your mum's siblings' names?

Oh, Martha, Therese. Wait, hold on. Martha? Yeah. Martha. Yeah. Martha. Yeah.

And Therese. Therese, yeah. Anthony, David, and Paul. That felt like Dutch at the start, eh? Like Martha and... That's not Dutch. What was the other one? Therese.

Therese. Interesting. Okay. How many questions do you have remaining, Paul? I'm just trying to think of my Auntie Margaret's sister's name. Okay. Anne. Was that your

fifth question? Yep. Now, it's at this stage where we will give you, Vaughan, 15 seconds to guess the mum's name. Now, I notice that all the names you've written down during the questioning are all single names, aren't they? Executive

intern Anya, if I can bring you in here. Yes. Good morning. You have just messaged me the mum's name. Vaughan doesn't know, but it is a double-barrelled name. Fletch? You can't give a clue? It is hyphen. Name, hyphen,

name. So you will now have to guess name, hyphen, name in 15 seconds, Vaughn. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I've got one hyphen name on the list. Say it slowly then. Well, no, you're going to have 15 seconds.

Now, Sarah, if you hear your mum's name, say stop. That's my mum's name. Your Vaughn has 15 seconds. I'm going to write down Megan's one. I'm going to go with Megan's one. Your mum's name. Your time starts now. Donna Marie.

No? Okay. Okay, she didn't answer. Wendy Lou. I just said Wendy. I'm going to have to put Lou on the end of everything. I've only got one other one. Marianne was my only other double barrel.

Yes, it's my mum's name. Piss off! What? I was hoping that I'd drop that on you and you'd fail finally. That was the only other one I had. What was it? Marianne. Marianne. Marianne.

Wow. Oh, my God. I like your one, Donna Marie. I just really felt it in my jellies. It was because I had a friend whose mum owned new cars all the time. That was her name and I just wrote it down. Bonus round. While you're on the phone, I'll have a go at guessing your dad's name.

All right, well, you've won $100 cash, Sarah. It's time for the bonus round. $100 more on the line. Vaughn has one guess at your dad's name. Vaughn, what's dad's name? I've got nothing. Is it double barreled? I'm staying out of this. Is it double-barrelled? I'm staying out of this.

Is it double-barrelled? No. Good. Because I don't know any double-barrelled men. Marianne and Joe. Nah, it wouldn't be a Joe. It wouldn't be a Joe. I don't know.

You're on your own today. I don't know. You're on your own today. I don't know. Wayne. Peter. Why do I feel like it's a J? Dave. No, I don't think it'd be a J. Miriam and...

Doug. Doug. Miriam and Doug. No, it doesn't quite... Miriam and Doug, aren't you? No, it doesn't quote. Miran and Barry. No, it's not Barry. That doesn't roll well.

You feeling anything here, Sarah, or are we like knocking on? I'm putting out the vibes, but you're not on the right number. Wait, wait, wait. She's got to give out the vibes. She's got to be there to give out the vibes. She's there, but I'm turning down her fader. Don't turn her down. Because you don't want to give a reaction.

We're not giving away money willy-nilly. It's got to be earned. Calvin Cruikshank doesn't mute the crowd before he starts guessing. Marianne and Calvin. You've got five seconds. Kevin. It's like Calvin. Yeah.

Are you locking in Kevin? Sarah, is that your dad's name? No. What is it? Mike. Oh, Mike. Marianne and Mike. Yeah.

But you know what? Kevin was the first man she dated after she left my dad. That son of a bitch. You put out the vibes. I was picking up the wrong guy. I saw an older man. I saw an older man, a man that your mother had feelings for.

I'm feeling Kevin. Wow. Hey, thanks for playing, Sarah. $100 cash. Congratulations. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. A bit of correspondence over that song there from Doja Cat. I messaged Lily from Big Save as she lives in Napier.

Yes. And I said, I hope you and the family, because people don't know this, but Big Save's actually their surname. I said, I hope the Big Saves are all well. And she said, yes, they're good. I hope they got the Ottomans to higher ground. They're good, yep. But the Ottomans were actually the higher ground.

Yeah. If you're looking to make higher ground, nothing's higher than the Ottoman. Yeah. Stand up on that. And I also heard from a guy, Adam, on Instagram message saying, hey, he's a water rescue specialist. Okay, like ducks and stuff.

Yeah, don't tell people to drive slowly through the floodwater. Tell them to not drive through floodwaters at all. It takes about 15 centimetres of water for the average car to become buoyant. That's not even... What? What a great fact. What a handy day to have the ruler in the studio. I can indicate that's how much 15 centimetres, and if you drive your car

into that... Yeah. That's why you shouldn't hit those puddles. Sometimes we're in the car and you'll hit a puddle. Or your aquaplane across the road. No, not when you hit it with just one corner of the car. You'll just spin out of control. Adam's going to disagree with you. So Thursday after the show, Megan,

you're flying to your hometown of Nelson. Yeah. I'm racing there in time to get to my college, Nalin College's, prize giving. Because you might remember one year ago when we were in Nelson, the principal came

down and granted my forever dream of speaking at my school. Because I was like, they have never asked me back. Sometimes I don't even think they acknowledge that I went there. Why would they? But sure. What are you expecting?

A little plaque in the back of the hall? Did your school have that? That would be nice. Did your school have a list of famous? We had all the famous sports people that had gone to the school. Yeah, right. I don't know if we didn't have plaques of like, I don't know if we had. Who are some other alumni from Nayland? I don't know. That didn't have we didn't have plaques of like I don't know if we had Who are some other alumni from Nayland?

I don't know That's a great list to join No Guy Williams went to a different school He's just from Nelson Megan Yeah But we could start a plaque area I mean I'm happy to I mean what kind of

Your dad's a sign maker nothing would be sadder than turning up with a sign your dad had made with your name on it saying Nayland alumni No I didn't want a plaque I just was, nothing would be sadder than turning up with a sign your dad had made with your name on it saying, Nayland alumni. No, I didn't want to plaque.

I just was like, it would be nice. I'd love to do one of those talks at the school. To give back to the students or something. Yeah. God, the Nayland school website's absolute rubbish. Maybe you can have a word to them about that. I'm about to go down there. Yeah, but look, Fletch, look at this.

I've clicked on it. Is it Comic Sans? No, look. Oh, no, it hasn't loaded. Oh, no, that hasn't loaded properly, Vore. It hasn't loaded, sweetheart. No, hon. Sweetie.

Hon, it has loaded. No, because I've been on it recently. I've refriged it multiple times. That's your computer, sweetheart. No, no, no, it's not my computer, sweetheart. It is. It's got a big picture on the front. Nailand.school.nz.

Yeah, look, it's loaded fine for me. Look at that. That's actually a really nice website. No, no, no, click on one of the things. Look at that. That's actually a really nice website. No, no, no. Click on one of the things. I'll send you this direct link. No, okay. It's your computer.

Look, I just did click on a link. It's actually a beautiful website. No, I won't apologise. Apologies are for the weak. Click on that link I sent you. Click on that link I sent you. Both of you, please. If this is just my computer issue,

I need to go see the IT folk here at work. Ha! And we'll all wait for it to load. It's because the link has an L in front of it and then a dot. I loaded what they... No, it doesn't. Not on mine, it does.

Locked. Oh, does that stand for locked? Why is mine locked? No, it's just saying this is a secure connection. 28 cookies in use. Fuck up your ideas. So this is me this Thursday. It's happening.

A year has passed. I know. I blinked and that happened. And now I have to do what I said I would do. And now I'm not sure I want to do it. So there's a few things I'm scared of. One, I introduced myself and everyone's like who's that?

Which is high risk. Highly possible. I'm scared that if I make a joke, no one's going to laugh and there might even be a yawning. And I'm also scared There might even be yawning. I'm also scared that I might get heckled. I know, or what if

you definitely get heckled. What if someone makes a if someone makes a... Oh, you'll definitely get heckled. What if someone makes a TikTok video and it's just like, oh my God, old lady no one knows talks to school. Oh my God. Please don't do that. Please don't do that. And then the camera turns from you on stage to someone next to them and they're like, don't know.

Shrug their shoulders. Yes. Oh God, that's great like, don't know. Shrug their shoulders. Yes. Oh, God, that's great. I can't wait for that. But I'm going to re-watch Michelle Obama's speeches. What, to plagiarise? You can't plagiarise them. No, no, no, plagiarise.

I just need some of her vibes for her speeches. Right. Because I actually, I messaged and I was like, hey, how long do I have to talk for? And they said 10 minutes. I didn't actually ask what it's supposed to be about. I think you just need to inspire their future. 10 minutes flies by.

Like sometimes we just start talking and then when we finish, Ross is like, did I just talk for 10 minutes about nothing? And I was like, wow, that flew boy. Just start talking with no real plan of what's going to happen and then just see what happens

and then 10 minutes will be up before you know it. And I definitely won't end up as a TikTok. Old lady has break down on stage.

If you are listening from Nalin College, we should run a competition. No. Nalin College's best TikTok of Megan. No, don't do that. No, because I just freeze when I see their phones out.

Are you allowed? You wouldn't be allowed phones in a assembly, would you? No, you're definitely not. I've heard from the principal. That's what makes this competition even more thrilling and exciting. Someone is not going to get their yearbook because of you. You will have encouraged them to take their phones into a cell. I didn't get my last yearbook at school

because I didn't pay my library fees. And you know what? I'm still doing alright. But if you were to look up somebody's name from a class photo No one does that. Yeah, alright. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The Podcast. ZM.

Time for Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Today's Fact of the Day is about how the five fingers got their names. Index, middle, ring, pinky, thumb. Is that their actual names? Middle's self-explanatory. It's the middle finger. Yeah. Index, that's the one right next to the thumb,

between the middle finger and the thumb. The index comes from the Latin indico, which means to point out. Because you point with that finger mostly. So it's the point. It's like indicator. You're to indicate something. You point with your pointy finger. The ring finger is called thus because you put your ring on it,

but what do you put your ring on it? The Egyptians believed it had a vein in it that linked directly to the heart. So that's why when you love someone and you're going to be with them, you put the ring around there and that signifies their link to your heart. Cute, but factually incorrect. Very factually incorrect. Yeah, the Romans believed it too, but no, factually incorrect. What else have we got?

We've covered them all. Oh, no, thumb. I thought thumb was quite an interesting. It comes from the really ancient world, tum, meaning to swell. So it's like the other fingers, except it's the swollen one. So that's why your thumb is called the thumb because it's a really, really old word. Because you know how when you hear it's got its origins in Old English or Middle Eastern or Hindi. This language believed to have come from Proto-Indo-European language.

Which is kind of... Real old. Really, really old. Tom meaning to swell. And so that is the swollen one and that's just kind of stuck. And then pinky comes from... Scottish people apparently use it, but they adopted it from the Dutch. Pink means

small. Oh, okay. Dutch term pink means small and to pink was to contract the eye so the pink eye yeah pink eye is called pink eye because in dutch it meant to have smaller eyes to contract the eye pink eye and that's why you call it, so pink eye, when you get pink eye and your eye gets swollen shut. It's smaller. Yeah. So that is related to the same reason your thumb, your little finger is called the pinky.

Why is your little finger so much littler? Why doesn't it just grow the same? Grab? Grab? Grip, maybe, yeah. Descending grip? Because, yeah, kind of feel shut, kind of similar, don't they? And the other thing I learned, you know how you hear people say, like, phalanges?

Yeah. That's the sections of the finger. So the thumb only has two phalanges. That's such a weird word, eh? Phalanges. It is. But, like, the other fingers are made up of three phalanges. The distal phalange is the furthest apart,

the intermediate phalange and the proximal phalange. So there you go. Phalanges. You've learned a lot about your hands today. You'll probably use them and think about, or not at all. Your phalanges. Your phalanges and what different fingers and thumbs have. So today's fact of the day is your little finger is called the pinky

because of the Dutch word for smaller, which is also related to pink eye. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Flesh, fauna, Megan, the, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, coronavirus vaccine has been deemed 90% safe in trials. Now, I read that... What does that even mean? No, 90% effective. I read that's as effective as the measles vaccination. Oh, I see what you're saying. And 90% of the test cases it's been...

Effective, yeah. And they reckon they can get 15 to 20 million doses available by the end of the year. But that's worldwide. Needle? To most vulnerable people. Needle, yes. Yeah.

Needle? No, because some vaccinations can be nasal. It actually doesn't say. You know what I'd like to see? A vaccination gummy bear. Yum. Yeah, I know. How great would that be?

No, and you could hide the microchip in it easier. Sure. Well, we talked about it earlier in the week, but it has now been confirmed that the Fruju Tropical Snow will be back on New Zealand shelves this summer. Now, this is some good news, because I've just read the co-creator of Scooby-Doo died today. Okay.

One more. Ruh-roh. One more of that. Ruh-roh, Reggie, indeed. But yeah, Fruju Snow is going to be back. We speculated. Somebody did say on line they screencapped an email that they received from Tip Top when asking whether F was their Fruju Snow.

That purchase date would be a couple of weeks. Now, that was purely speculated. It could have been faked at that stage. Yeah. But it has been confirmed that it will be back. Well, yeah. Fantastic news. The best.

Because you always go on about this ice cream. Yeah, 81 calories of deliciousness. So 2014 and 2017 was when it had a limited run. What? I thought it actually lived as a regular ice cream. Yeah, apparently it's back. George, you know, have you already had one? Have you had one?

You already had one. Already. In person. As opposed to what? No, but yesterday on my show, I asked people if they've got their hands on them already, and Invercargill has lots going on down there. No, Invercargill, no.

It's so beholden, Invercargill. They're still on the 2017 supply. What's that? Sorry, I had my headphones down. Don't worry. No, you don't get toen and Vicargill. They're still on the 2017 supply. What's that? Sorry, I had my headphones down. Don't worry. No, you don't get to hear the jokes any time around. If you weren't listening the first time around, you don't get the funny regional burn.

So that's good. They're rolling them out already. Good to know. Yeah. That's just what we need. The end of 2020. Yeah. Just more delicious food.

It's good stuff. Good stuff. It's Fletch, Va It's good stuff. Good stuff.