ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 11th August 2021

Episode Date: August 10, 2021

Top 6: Power Shortages  Community Notices  Jacinda Ardern!  Vaughans Trip to Hospital  Hillary Barry! Yummy Yummy!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Clay. ZM's Fleets, Vaughan and Megan. Welcome to the Fleets, Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to McCafe. Grab any size McCafe coffee. For only $4, conditions do apply. Need more money?

Yes, please. Want a sweet motorbike? Oh, I join a gang. I saw this. Are you reading an ad? Modern gangs are recruiting new members with starter packs. Yeah, like it's- You know those funny memes online that it's like,

I'm not sure, girl, starter pack, which I found very offensive because it had a Suzuki Jimny in it. I did laugh at that. That's just offensive to not sure girls. Excuse me, they love a Jimny. And horns. And for all their four-wheel driving, they do. Yeah.

But yeah, one of those starter pack memes, and it would be like a sweet motorbike and up to $20,000. A former mongrel mob member has said that, yeah, they're getting starter packs now. It's not just like back in the day where you did some horrible, horrible initiation and it was a leather jacket and a pair of gummies. It's like motorbikes and cash. Isn't that insane?

And that cash would be nothing to the gangs, right, with the gangs right? Or they've got to get rid of the cash somehow. Yeah, that's true. Easier than laundering it. So, I mean, how badly do you want those Gucci loafers? I was talking when I was in Wellington like a month ago, a friend in hospo was saying how crazy it is to find good staff

and apparently like some places are offering like a couple of thousand dollars just to come and like just start a job and sign on like a sign-on bonus yeah yeah and host and host just because it's so hard to find like decent like staff that are going to stay and do the danger of that you give someone a sign-on i think it's probably with uh you've got to sign on and then stay three months and then you get there yeah yeah right we'll stay a certain amount of time. But I was like, that is nuts. Because if that's the equivalent of like a few weeks work,

doing whatever hours you do, you'd just be like, yeah, I'll take it. And then skiddly-do. Yeah, true. Someone who worked as a boss in hospital, I did get ghosted twice by chefs. Do you remember that? Yeah. They just didn't turn up anymore.

No phone call. You should have been an undercover boss. You literally didn't turn up to work undercover boss you should have put on like a prosthetic nose and some glasses and be like i'm the new employee what do you guys think of the best i mentioned undercover boss in the mongrel moth yeah i'm just a new recruit around here just like you guys that'd be a great episode. I'd watch that. Hello. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fleet, Schmorn and Megan. Two minutes past six. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. The Prime Minister on the show this morning. Good. She's going to be getting it. Some hard questions. She'll be on 10 to 8 this morning.

Yep. Ahead of the, because she's announcing a plan tomorrow. What's our post-COVID plan once we're all vaccinated? What do they call it? Someone call it the roadmap to freedom? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Calm down.

It's not liberating a repressed people, are we? Jeez Louise. Yeah. Snowflakes. Well, looking at everybody else's overseas roadmap to freedom, it's not going too great. Yeah, America thought they had it sorted in there. Delta came in, they were like, oh, ha, bitch, it's me, Delta. I'm back.

I'm back, bitch. I'm better than ever. Yeah, so let's just maybe manage our expectations on that one. I mean, that's very important manage our expectations on that one. I think that's very important at this fickle time. Did everybody have power last night? We didn't count anybody's power? I did, yes.

Okay, good. I had power. I was gutted. I haven't seen you wanted to power. Well, I bought those generators and I still haven't had to turn them on. You're ready for your doomsday shelter. Well, I'm ready to charge a phone. Just check Facebook, yeah. Yeah, shelter. Well, I'm ready to charge a phone. Just check Facebook. Yeah.

Just constantly be bothering Victor, being like, where's my power? Coming back on. So you got a generator because of that, not the freezer with all the meat in it. I could plug that in. But it's mostly about Facebook and social. Yeah, yeah.

Okay, good. Good to know. Yep. Your chance to get a free ride and have some of those boring mundane bills paid off all thanks to the movie Free Guy. Eight o'clock. You've got to listen out for the activator. Yeah, next on the show, we're going to talk about the world's best airports. Because despite the fact that airfoil people are using them, they've decided to release the list anyway for 2021.

So, you know, normally there used to be a list of, oh, yeah, I'll be going there. Oh, yeah, I just went there. Oh, yeah, friend said that was amazing. So we'll rub that in your face next. Play ZM's Fleshphone and Megan. The list of the world's best airports has been released. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Because it was needed in 2021. Yeah. Why are they bothering? Just let us know that they're around their toes. You see the odd photo of someone going through Auckland International Airport, even when, you know, the bubble was open and it looked grim and sad. But, you know, a lot of countries, their airports are humming. Yeah.

You kind of forget that, don't you? Humming? Mm. But it was Skytrax had a new top airport because Singapore's Changi Airport always wins this. Oh, because it's got a rainforest in it, doesn't it? Yeah. And a fountain.

Phenomenal airport. Massive. There's a train that can take you from one part to another. I had a friend coming back from the Olympics. He just got back yesterday and he said, I came through Changi Airport and I said, oh, what's that like at the moment? Like with the pandemic?

He said, oh, they just take you to a room. Like you're basically your departure gate and you stay there. Right. So you can't even enjoy like the airport. All the shopping. Yeah. Got it. Toblerones.

So you probably couldn't even get a Toblerone. So it's been overtaken by Qatar's Hamad Airport. Oh, yeah, that's a good airport. Which is now the best airport in the world. Yeah, it's a good airport. There's a train for you too, because I know you love a little... I like a train and an airport. Your little tram's in an airport.

Have I been to the Qatar airport? Yes, you have, because we were on that flight that time. Oh, yeah, that's right. And the airline was... What was the airline called? Qatar. Oh, yeah. Yeah. right. And the airline was, what was the airline called? Qatar. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

They have a really nice popcorn shop of all things. A whole shop for popcorn. Yeah, like millions of different flavours. My teeth are just like, no, you stay out of that shop. So, yeah, it's going to be the, well, fingers crossed, it will be the main gateway to the 2020 Football World Cup. 2022. That's right. 2022 Football World Cup next year.

So while a lot of airports kind of went into sleep mode, has continued to upgrade and get itself all ready for the Football World Cup, although every day that passes, I don't know how many people are going to be going to the Football World Cup. Yeah. Then second was Tokyo's Haneda Airport.

Okay. I haven't been there. Apparently, they pledged absolute airport cleanliness. Okay. During the Olympics, the delayed Olympics, and it was named the best airport in Asia and second best overall. And then Changi got third. Right.

But Changi was the best airport in the 10 to 15 million passenger category and still the owner of the world's best airport staff award. Right. Did New Zealand miss out again? We don't seem to have any. We were on the list. We had a ranking last time. Did we?

Did I say we're 19th or something maybe? Auckland Airport crashed out of the top 30. It's at number 35. It was in 29 last. Christchurch has fallen 14 places to 79. Probably because

they got rid of that lolly cake with the icing on it. Yeah, we've mentioned that before. That would take a hit in your Skytrax ratings. What about, you know,

Wellington Airport when you go through the security, it's got those fancy conveyer belt security things for your laptop. You know, you put your bags in them. I like that. It's fast. They've all got conveyor belts.

No, but you know the ones that automatically take it aside. Like if it detects something, it goes. Yeah. Five people can stand there and then you just chuck your shit on and go through it. Wellington Airport's the only airport that's made me take my boots off. They're like, oh, if a shoe covers the ankle, it's got to come off. No, but I've worn boots.

Yeah, I know. I think it's just you. Maybe. It's your beard. I had a look. It's the beard beanie combo with boots. It screams militant. Yeah, it screams militant.

Thank you. So cute. ZDM's. Yeah, it screams militant. Thank you. So cute. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. In the United States, twins has increased. The amount of twins being born has increased by 70% over the past 30 years. Is that because of like IVF and stuff? Yes, it is. Fertility treatments.

Wait, so people choose? They're like, yes, we want twins. it is. Fertility treatments. And I didn't know this. Wait, so that people choose, they're like, yes, we want twins. Or no, you just, are they more likely with IVF? Yeah. It's not just IVF. So fertility treatments,

including the one that I underwent, they said to you, there is a higher chance for multiple births just because you're like boosting the body's ability to make eggs. Right. So there's more of a chance that you'll have multiple babies. Were you like, oh, we don't want eight?

I was like, plus twins are in my family. So I was like, here we go. Here we go. But yeah, it is that. It's IVF, general fertility treatments. And I didn't know, but the older the female is, the higher the chance of having twins.

Really? Yeah. Mother's age, and because there's a trend worldwide of women having babies older, there's also more opportunity for multiple births. Right. So there you go, twins. And the pill as well. What? Apparently the pill. That's supposed go, twins. And the pill as well. What?

Apparently the pill. That's supposed to stop them. When you come off it. Is it like a backlog at the factory? It doesn't. It just says, and the pill is. And the eggs are just like. Yeah. I guess it's.

Yeah, I don't know how that would affect it. But 70% in the past 30 years. I walked past some twins the other day and they must get this so much but I was just like, oh, those, I was like, those two look the same

and then I was like, oh my God, they look the same. They're the same. They're real the same. They're like, and I was just like, between them,

I was like, they look exact, oh my God, they look exactly the same and then I was like, oh, they're twins. Do you think? I was just like,

they must get that all the time, right? Because it kind of takes you by surprise. You're just like, is this a mirror? What about siblings that just look identical that aren't twins? That are like a year or two apart, but they look so much the same. People are like, oh, are you twins? And they're like, no, just standards.

Do you think there's ever been twin babies that have been switched names? You know, like... Oh, definitely. Before they get a little bow on them or something. Yeah, like they're born and you're like, okay, you know, like. Oh, definitely. Before they get like a little bow on them or something. Yeah. Like they're born and you're like, okay, that one is Fletcher. That one is Vaughn. Yeah.

And then they get a bit older or like. We got a tat. Weeks go past and then eventually you're like, oh no, that one, you know, they've been switched. Yeah. Before you realise that Fletcher's got a birthmark on his butt or something. Are you allowed to draw on your babies? Yeah. That's actually, I to draw on your babies? Yeah. That's actually, I've never thought about that.

Yeah, I always think about that. They've probably had been Fletch and Vaughn in their time. Because after a while, you'd know the difference. There'd be some slight differences. But yeah, initially. You'd notice some kind of mark. Yeah, yeah. Totally.

There's totally been the old switcheroo. What if one was born Fletch And then eventually Ended up being born Just because you Switched them around Fluffed it You met twins

Very interchangeable I wouldn't be concerned Too much about it Nah Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Megan In the UK A man

A young fellow Was He wanted to resign From Tesco which is like a supermarket Yeah, like Countdown on New World So he wanted to resign, he said to his boss I'm resigning and the boss says

you need to formally resign and he said gotcha boss So he went and he put on a black suit and a top hat and he got a walking stick and he got his brother to also dress formally. And they walked into Tesco at which stage his brother makes a hear ye, hear ye type announcement and breaks the wax seal on the scroll he has,

which he then opens and reads aloud his brother's resignation. This is so good. There is a video, but the person holding the camera is too far away. Yeah. You can't hear it as much. Yeah. It's worth a watch. They're in suit and ties.

Security comes over just to make sure nothing's going to get too out of hand. Yeah. And they watch as a formal resignation is tendered and then handed to the boss before leaving. They leave, yeah. If I was his boss, I'd very much appreciate that. I would. You couldn't be mad at that, could you? How could you be mad?

No. As this very, very formal resignation. Best resignation of 2021. Not that I know of any others. No. No, it's been a quiet year for resignations. Most people are holding on to their jobs if they can. But yes, a formal resignation nonetheless.

Fantastic resignation. Great idea. Great idea. If you're asked to formally resign, I recommend you do the same thing. From the panoramic ZM think tank, this is the Top Six. Hello. Welcome to the Top 6. Power, shortages, outages, cuts, rolling brownouts.

Do you remember rolling brownouts? I do remember those. Why is it brownouts and not a blackout? Because they didn't blackout. They just did things like turn off your hot water cylinder. They didn't completely cut off the power. It was when the hydroelectric dams were very empty in the early 2000s. And they did these things called rolling brownouts,

where they'd be like, you may be experiencing like a lack of power, so your high-use devices might not work, your kettle will take longer to boil, and you won't have hot water because we're doing... We're doing rolling brownouts. And I just always thought it was just the funniest... The funniest words. Yeah.

Rolling brownouts. Anyway, it might not come to that. They just turned some people's power off the other night. Yeah. And then everyone's blaming... That's so not fair. Everyone's like... The government's like blaming the generators.

And then what the generators are saying, oh no, it's the government's fault. Yeah, I don't know. And then everyone's blaming everybody and everyone was debating it in parliament yesterday.

Yeah. I mean. They should have done a quick ring around. Hey, do you have a fireplace? Yes. Do you got some wood?

Yes. I would recommend lighting it. Why is that? Click, just hang up. And then their power goes off. Yeah. And then you can be like,

well, you were forewarned. Yeah. So I've got the top six ways to ensure we don't run out of power. Okay. Number six. We all plug exercise cycles and rowing machines into the national grid and just do a few minutes a day.

That sounds easy. And then that would help our third most obese country. Bingo. Yeah. Bingo. Have a competition. I don't know what the prize can be. Pizza. Everyone loves pizza. I don't know what the prize can be. Pizza.

Everyone loves pizza. I'm doing the exercise, but yeah. Doing the money, get the treats. Imagine if you had to generate your own power each day from your exercise. Yeah. Wild. You'd be fit. You'd spend the whole time rowing just to keep your lights on and then it's bedtime.

Yeah, you're so knackered you don't need the power you've made. That'd be great. Store it up. Use it for other things. Number five on the list of the top six ways we ensue where we don't run out of power. We go back to using fire for warmth. I'm talking coal. I'm talking wood. Never mind your clean and whisper

quiet heat pumps. Have you experienced the roaring heat of a smoke-producing fire from two feet away and then the stark freezing cold of the other end of that same room? Because that's what it's like having a fireplace. It's either a Swedish sauna or a fry pan. Only hot right by the fire, freezing cold everywhere else. Number four on the list of the top six ways to ensure

we don't run out of power. Thicker power lines. I don't know how these things work, but more power equals, more wire equals more power through the wire. This is like a hose, right? The bigger the hose, the more power. The more water, yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Of course you'd be like, girth is better.

Yeah, get a girth in you. It doesn't work like that. Obviously girth is better, Megan. Right. Run one big thick one right up the country. Yeah, okay. And see if more power can fit through there. A girthy, thick, long one.

Yeah. Right up the country. Right up the country. Who wouldn't like that? Nobody. Struggling to think of it. Well, apparently Megan over here. Number three on the list of the top six ways to ensure we don't run out of power.

I think the government should issue all of us night vision goggles so we don't need lights. I've always wanted those, just because you see them in movies and video games and you're just like, how cool would... And you'd turn them on like a... Like you'd never use them. Yeah. And then you can see in the dark. Yeah. You'd never use them. Use them all the time.

You would. You'd just walk around your back section looking for possums. Yeah. Walk around looking for everything. Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six ways to ensure we don't run out of power. Make electric vehicles illegal. I'll tell you when we didn't have to turn off random people's power. When we all were driving diesels.

Now that every Tom, Dick and Harry has a Nissan Leaf. Yeah. Or a Hyundai Kona. Now that every Tom, Dick and Harry has a Nissan Leaf. Yeah. All right. Hyundai Kona. I mean, many of your suggestions are not great for our carbon footprint. Like the United Nations have literally said we're screwed unless we do something today about global warming. Let's do it tomorrow. Why do today what we could do tomorrow?

Yeah. And number one on the list of the top six ways to ensure we don't run out of power. We could all make a move to solar power, like solar panels on our house, and batteries to store the excess energy produced during the day to help heat our houses. No, actually, that's a dumb idea. I'll stop right there. That's quite stupid. Stupid idiots.

You stupid dum-dums. You. You stupid dum-dums. You dumb old stupid dum-dums. That's today's top six. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. A story comes to us about an Uber Eats driver who has taken a chip tax. Which I'm all for. That's just...

No harm, no foul. You're asking someone to bring you chippies. Is that the main reason They staple the 100% why they staple The Uber Eats order Yeah I'd still wriggle my fingers Down the side

Of the staple This is chip tax To the next level I see If I was an Uber Eats driver I'd take a stapler My own stapler I'd undo the staple

I'd get one of those Staple Staple openers Yep Or I just get my nails under And I can open a staple like that You'll do that right Until a staple goes up

Under the nail And then causes bleeding Under the nail Those are really yelchies Yeah Well I'm all for a chip tax If you go and get it

Tap yourself To a couple of chippies It's a given Yep This guy's helped himself To an entire bowel Like a A bowel bun Like a pork bowel. No, you don't say

bun because bowel is bun. Stop saying bowel bun. So I could go buy some bowel buns and enter my pin number by my bowel bun. Your multiple bowel. That's another one that annoys you, pin number.

You missed that didn't you? Yeah, I did. I'm bow. That's another one that annoys you. Pin number. Yeah, pin number at... You missed that, didn't you? Yeah, yeah, I did. I was turning on bow. The thing is with that, though, is they're going to notice it's gone. Yeah. You're not buying a hundred bows. You're buying, you know, maybe four or two. Like, they're not going to notice a couple of chippies, but... No, well... How did they know

they'd eaten it, though? Because what they ordered didn't arrive? No, but maybe the store just left out a bow. Oh, maybe that's what the driver was hoping they'd think it though. How do they know the store? Because what they ordered didn't arrive? No, but maybe the store just left out a bao. Oh, maybe that's what the driver was hoping they'd think. No, because the container had contained two bao and then there were remnants of spring onion garnish on the bao left in one half of the container. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the container.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. At least move it and spread it around. Yeah. Also, plastic container, where's that coming from? Yeah, that's got a... It's not great for your bowel and also the environment. A five in the triangle, though. Oh, so it's recyclable, is it?

I don't know what that means. I don't know. Sometimes you've got to put it in the bin and they'll be like, no, five. And you're like, well, what do I do with five in the triangle now? Just put it in the bin and they'll be like, no, five. And you're like, well, what do I do with five in the triangle now? Put it in the bin. Into the landfill would be the only. Oh, that's, so what's happened? Also, the staple opening of the bag. Sloppy, sloppy.

Rips. Have you got a picture? They really didn't care, did they? Oh, okay. So they've literally just ripped open the bag. Yeah. Oh, come on. And then popped open the plastic container.

Does this person not want to do their job anymore? I'm going to go out. I'm going to have a bow. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to bow out. Thank you. Thank you.

That was good. Thank you. Good one from you, dumpling. But then so other people have raised the concern that a stranger has put their hands into your food and we're living in COVID times. This was in Australia and in rural Queensland, like regional Queensland. Okay. So people are saying. They can't even eat the other one.

Yeah, you shouldn't have eaten the other one. And because the people that put it up were kind of like, ha, ha, ha. And a lot of the people are like, no, ha, ha, ha. That's not so ha, ha, ha. Well, not in these COVID times. But then chip tax is still legit. Yeah.

And nuggy tax. If it's your flatmate or partner or friend... Oh, yeah, not if you've been paid to deliver it. But if you're delivering it, absolutely tax them a chippy, some chippies and some nuggies. A bite of the burger? Nah. Cut yourself off some.

Or if you've got that clean. If you've got the EFTPOS card, just buy yourself one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Get yourself a little cheesy bee. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. Love Island UK. The guys on this season are really doing my... Love Island, you COVID it should be called.

Yeah. Are you watching this season? Yeah, I'm a bit behind though. Okay. But the guys on this season are really doing my head in. That's a general consensus. Oh, no. Guys on reality TV shows...

Douchebags. Douchebags. It's almost. Now, I mean, I don't want to make this sound like a conspiracy theory, but it's almost like they chose guys that would rub the viewers and women on the show up the wrong way, do you think? Or nah, they wouldn't. Yeah, right, and cause a bit of chat online.

Yeah, they wouldn't do that, though. And then that teamed up with the fact that people who would go on these shows are probably also more likely that sort of standard douchebag. Nah, surely not. Surely not. So there's that. But also, I find it really conflicted because I watch it and I'm like, I don't want to judge these people because that's what they want me to do and we shouldn't be doing that in

this day and age. But then I get roped in and I can't look away and I think generally, like, you know, they've been pretty nice to each other. I honestly can't believe we still, like, these shows are still allowed. Especially Love Island have had a lot of problems.

Yes, especially in the last few years. But they said they're committed to providing support before, during, and after for these contestants. Right. And this is why. Because Faye, Faye from Love Island has been absolutely roasted for her makeup. So the women on these shows get picked apart for their looks.

Oh, it'd be horrible if you went on one of these shows. Absolutely picked apart. Yeah, right, okay. But in saying that, as soon as people had a problem with someone's makeup from Love Island, I knew who they were talking about. Jesus Christ, what the hell is that? Don't say what the hell is that.

Vaughn. Vaughn is referencing, Fletch just showed a picture of Faye. I'm like, Fletch, we're talking about Love Island. Stop showing me that woman's Kermit the Frog cosplay. That's, wow. Did she look in a mirror before? What's she done there with the makeup on the lips?

It's atrocious. So she has overdrawn her lips. Overdrawn, yeah, that's this photo here. It's not all of them. Like this photo here, she looks, you know, great. The makeup's good. But then this one, it's like photo here. Yeah. It's not all of them. Like this photo here, she looks, you know, great. The makeup's good. But then this one, it's like, oh, yeah. The other thing is she could be doing her makeup with one set of lighting.

And then as she's on the show, it has a different kind of lighting. What, a red light at a stop sign at an intersection? What light is she using? And it's in HD and stuff. So we see it differently maybe because not only are her lips quite overdrawn, but she has a different face colour to the rest of her body.

So she's chosen a foundation that is... There's almost like different colours on the face as well. Okay. But see, that's the other thing. The producer could easily say, hey, look, we'll do your make-up before you go on camera. Yeah. And here's the other thing. The producer could easily say, hey, look, we'll do your makeup before you go on camera.

Yeah. And here's today's challenge. We're all going to do a contouring challenge. Make it a challenge. Like, hey, maybe your makeup doesn't look right. We could fix this. But they let her go on the show like this, knowing that people are going to be ruthless and say you've overdrawn your lips.

And, yeah, your makeup colour's not right. So, yeah, a lot of people are commenting on this online. They find it quite distracting. There's a thing I feel so bad for her because she's going to come off and everyone's just going to be, like, picking her apart for her looks and her makeup. If this was someone that was your friend or you worked with them, would you

be able to say something? I want to say yes, but I don't know. Because it's in the same boat of like if someone has a deodorant problem or lack of deodorant problem. Like, it's very hard to say something, isn't it? There's a golden lock zone of friendship where you can say that sort of stuff.

Because it would be hard to say it to like your best friends. Yeah. Because it would be hard to say it to, like, your best friends. Yeah. And it would be hard to say it to people you are loosely associated with. But there's kind of a middle ground where you could probably be, like, hey, stinky. It would be horrible to say that to someone. It's so hard. And with makeup, like, they've looked in the mirror and they've gone, yes. They've chosen that and they've made the decision to leave the house

so they think it looks good. So I don't want to like... Yeah. What about this? What about this? What about this? Okay, so Fletch, pretend you smell. Okay.

You don't. You smell lovely. No, I've never smelled Theo from you. You're very neutral. You're very neutral. And then when you put on that, when you spritz yourself, you're away. When you were on maternity leave, these perfume bases arrived. These like plain, plain perfume.

It's the base of all perfumes, right? And because there's nothing added to it, everybody, it smells different on everybody. Right. On me, nothing. Maybe like a light lime. Okay. Fletch put it on, burly. Yeah, Vaughan was all over me.

You're a natural musk. It accentuated his natural musk, and he became like this aromatic beacon. Yeah, and just team that up with the Eros. Were you wearing like fragrance when I was away? No, he just tried it. As like this neutral scent, how it all worked. And then he worked through the office and it was like Pepe Le Pew without the sexual

inappropriateness. He was just walking and everyone was floating behind him on his scent. The Pied Piper. Yeah. Yeah. So I may be a bad example to you. Yeah, you're a bad example. But that was also the compliment.

Maybe I could walk up to you in the workplace. You're a work friend. How would you prefer to be told about your aroma? Professionally or like a friendly manner? No, that's because then if they're like, ah, professionally, you'd be like, okay, thank you. And then you go to HR and you're like, can you write Fletcher letter

and tell him that his smell is problematic? But see, you could tell me. You would tell me. I'd tell you. Like, if you had bad makeup or a smell. I wouldn't tell either of you. I wouldn't. I don't think. You'd sit with the stink.

There's absolutely no way I would be like, fletch your BO. You have an agreement with Vaughn about the moustache. Yeah. But I wouldn't tell you if you had BO. See, I would rather be told. It would hurt for a bit. I would be like, ouch.

Yeah. If it was unbeknownst to me. Yeah. I know there's some, I know there's a medical, again, this is a smell, not the makeup, but I know there's a medical thing where people can't smell themselves and, but they might be aware that they have an aroma. Oh, either way. And so they don't know if they are smelling at that stage or not.

Either way, it's hard though, isn't it? How do you broach it? So, I mean, off the back of this, we'd love to know if it's okay to tell someone that they have bad makeup. Because your intention is... You raise a good point. They saw themselves in the mirror and they're happy with it. So then that's their choice, right?

Yeah, are you just going to hurt their feelings and be like, well, I don't like what you've done with your face, essentially. Yeah, I'm just trying to think of solutions here. Go and get your colours done. Don't you go and get your colours done at a make-up place? Resin. Resin colour chart.

Yeah, often it's free and you get a free tester, a little pottle. So they could get it done in store and you could be like, this is the look for you. Right. Oh, my God. Nothing wrong with your last look But this is your look And then compliment hard on the new look I don't know

Maybe you've been in this situation 0800 DALSATM This was brought up because Faye from Love Island Just by the way I'm not Defending Faye's actions I'm not up to date So I'm not up with the drama that she's In a fight with We've just been told Faye's a real piece of shit.

She's had some abusive behaviour on the show. I haven't seen that yet. But, I mean, that aside, like, yeah. Everyone's talking about her make-up and the fact that it's, um, I mean, she's two different colours. Looks like she's let her kids do her make-up in some of these photos I'm seeing. It looks

like in Men in Black 1 where the alien wears the guy's skin as a costume okay it doesn't quite fit right in a kind way yeah it is because what are you doing this is a question do is it okay to tell your friend that uh or a work that they've got bad makeup yeah i mean what do you do i would just leave it. And you don't know, the reasons for people wearing makeup isn't always just superficial. They might be trying to, you know, cover up an insecurity. So it's a hard subject to broach. Nicole, what do you think?

Have you been in this situation? Hello. I have been in, like, the giving advice situation. So I think 100% you should tell them if you have a way to fix it. So if you guys are out and, you know, she's got makeup everywhere and it just doesn't look good, I think that you should probably leave it because you're probably going to ruin their night. Yeah. Because you don't have a way of fixing it.

Whereas I think that if you've got a way to fix it or if you've got deodorant on hand, you're like, here, just have some of this, like subtly without embarrassing anyone. Like I think that that's a really good thing to do. But I think if you don't have a way of fixing it, maybe you should keep it to yourself. But if you do, then I don't see the harm in like saying,

oh, here, just let me just touch up this, or let me just take your whole face off. Nicole, it sounds like you're approaching this like management approach as a problem at work, you know. Possibly. Tell them something they've done well. Yep. And then tell them the problem,

and then tell them something they're doing well. I think they call it an SHIT sandwich in management. It's an insult sandwich, eh? Yeah, they do. And so you... It's the best thing for friendship as well. Like, you know, you don't want to fully ruin their night by being like, gal, you look like, you know,

you don't look very good. You look like the bride of Chucky from those movies. But then if you go home and you look in the mirror and you're like, um, why did you not tell me? Yeah, that's true. Nicole, thanks for your call. Rhianne, what do you think? Is it okay to tell a friend their makeup's bad?

I kind of run with the rule, if they can't change it in five minutes, don't tell them. Oh, okay. Same kind of rule. Yeah, same kind of rule. So if you can't fix it easily or quickly, just let it go. Yeah, like it's what they've decided to either look like or do to their hair or whatever.

But if you can't, you know, just, I don't know, if they've got a messy updo and it doesn't quite work with the outfit, just leave it because that's harder to change in five minutes than changing a lipstick colour. I feel like this is an unspoken rule that I didn't know about. No, no, it's good. It's a text message saying this is a really common social rule. If they can fix it in under like a minute or five minutes,

you tell them, otherwise you don't. Like what if this is like, what if they're always drawing on their lips wrong? You're talking about an ongoing. Yeah, an ongoing issue. What do you do with that? Like they've got the wrong colour foundation. Maybe just have a chat

or, I don't know, do the old subtle, buy them a Mecca voucher for a $90 make-up session and be like, let's go shopping together. And then pile the compliments on. Yeah, and then go with them

and make sure that, yeah, the compliments will come on when they've got the right shade on. You could maybe go to Mecca like before, you could be there five minutes early and say to the person, look, my friend's coming in

and you need to sort their whatever out. They're doing it wrong. And then your friend walks in and the person at Mecca's got no social graces and they're like, oh my God, I see what you mean about your friend. Really, Rhianne, thanks for your call. Some messages in.

So many people are like, yeah, this is old. My nanny used to say, if a problem can't be fixed in five seconds, don't say anything. God, my nan used to say, you're getting a bit chubby. That cannot be fixed in five seconds. No. In fact, give me another biscuit. Woman, you are a biscuit dispensary.

You have made this the problem. That works if someone's got a booger or something or something in their teeth. That can be fixed in five minutes, five seconds. But literally, yesterday, producer Anya was like, go like this, don't get your jawline because I had a line. So she like, I fixed it. Of what? Of foundation.

Of stubble. Yeah, and your rubbed eye didn't come off and she's like, yeah, it's gone. How did you get a foundation line? How did you slip up? I didn't blend it. Oh, thank you. I didn't blend it. It you. I didn't blend it. It's 4am.

Come on, man. Yeah, but you've done this for like seven years and you haven't slipped up. I've never seen a foundation line. I've never seen a foundation line. No. I've never seen a foundation line. Thank you. People always say, where did she find the time?

I'm like, I don't know. Look at me. I look like an absolute piece of shit. I don't even have the time to put on moisturiser in the morning. Look at this dry Irish skin. Look at this parchment paper I've got for a face. Some poll results in. Is it okay?

We asked on our Instagram. Is it okay to tell your friend their makeup looks bad? 70% of people said yes, of course. But again, that rule probably applies. They can't fix it. Somebody said give them a UV light and a mirror. Apparently a UV light will show them the different... Maybe they can't see it in an ordinary light,

but a UV light, of course, shows... You have it on real thick in places, not enough in other places that you've gone all different. That's what they use on the crime shows, isn't it? I don't need one of those to see how unclean I am. Oh, no, not at your place. Made it look like a bloody disco. ZM's Fletchbourne and Megan.

Play ZM. ZM. Fletchbourne and Megan's Community Notices. Hello and welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we have a look at what's happening around New Zealand on local Facebook pages. Road works. That's not in today's, but that's a big one, isn't it?

Road works. Now, I'm going to end with that one. This one, now this one, the one coming up at the end is an interesting one. Okay. Because it's one of these ones, it actually happened, but people are now posting it on other pages saying it happened to them.

Oh, right. Which is a classic and usually you can spot this. It's usually BS. The first thing I look for if it's inside, PowerPoint's in the background. Oh, yeah.

Because a lot of times people will be like, I've got this for sale. I live in Rotorua. And you look and it's an American power plug in the background. You're like,

don't you lie to me. God, you are Detective Pikachu. Well, I mean, Pika P, I really am. People try to fool me but before that,

let's go to the Marlborough Cool Cat Chat. Okay. This is a bit of a fire Facebook page. We hear from these guys every now and then. Callie has written,

just a heads up to people who walk the Taylor River, there's a guy offering yoni massage. Not my thing. That's not okay. Google it if you need to and Google before you agree to it. Be safe out there, everybody.

You want to go to a trained yoniographer? A yoniologist? Or friend of the show, Morgan, the sexologist. She maps your yoni. She maps your yoni. She'll put it in Google Maps. Yeah, I think that's what happens. And send the directions to your partner.

Yeah. And they'll be able to find the what happens. And send the directions to your partner. Yeah. And they'll be able to find the big... They'll be able to find your avenue. I love Morgan, but she's not mapping my journey. They'll find your cul-de-sac and then take you for a big walk down the avenue. Okay. Yeah, I guess it would be weird to friend all up in your business. Yeah.

Yeah. Good luck finding mine. I don't think I need a map. You familiar with the area? Yeah, I'm good. Good luck finding mine. I don't think I need a map. You're familiar with the area? Yeah. It's, yeah. Okay. But so a man is down by the river offering

a free yoni. Yeah, this is very worrying. Very worrying. Call the police if you see this man. Not a free yoni. A free yoni massage. Massage, yeah. Oh, right, okay. This is from the Rolleston community page. Douglas writes, just seen this at New World. I'm not using the correct

tense. I have just seen this. I've just seen this. Just seen this. I mean, yeah, they're missing a word. Just saw this? Yeah. At New World and Rolleston, I'm tired. There's little to no patience today. It's absolutely worn to a nub.

I'll tell you more about that after 8 o'clock. Worn to a nub. Yeah. My patience is worn to a nub. It's been ground right down. Just seen this at the New Wood and Rolleston. I have reported it to the police. I was disgusted seeing this.

Now, this is a number plate on a Nissan El Grande. Now, a Nissan El Grande is a people mover. Oh, yeah. A grand, because it's grand. It's a grand. And it is the number plate that's the problem. What does it say? It says Ho-Bus.

H-O-E, bus. Now, how did they slip this one past the census? Who is that? Well, a ho is an implement of agriculture, isn't it? It's a tool. You're saying this is an agricultural people mover. I would have thought this would have been the time. How did that get through?

I don't know. Wow. Noughty bus. Nought. H-naughty bus. So even then, it's a naughty bus. If you take the zero as a nort, which I know some people do. But anyway, that's problematic.

Next on the Vic Deals pops up on the community notices page. Tatiana has a question. Is there a non-emergency fire number for advice? That's a good question because you've got your 111s for your emergencies. You've got your 105 for a non-emergency police report, don't you? To make contact. But I don't know if there's a non-emergency fire advice

number. Tatiana's after it. The reason being, my fish tank heater is smoking, but I don't want to waste the fire services time if it's not something major that I can just deal with myself with a regular extinguisher. This thing's

smoking enough that she's got an extinguisher. She's like, I might use you, but hold fire. I'm going to just ask Vic Deals what they think. Sorry if this sounds dumb. I'm just a bit scared of taking resources from someone who might actually need them. Now, isn't that a conscientious member of the public? Yeah. I mean, unplug it and just go buy a new one.

Unplug it. I didn't even think of that, Fletch. That's weird. Take it outside. How heavily is it attached to the tank? Oh, my God, it's smoking. I'm going to post on a Facebook page. It might be part of a tank.

Yeah, I don't know. But if it can be removed, that would have been my solid advice. And finally, on community notices today, someone tried to claim this in Christchurch. Simon the Thief. Okay. Tried to say this happened to him at Parklands. A thief he is because this actually happened in Mount Maunganui.

A dog made an X-rated discovery on the beach. Here is the dog. And it has a flesh-coloured hat on. This happens so often. Fun toy. Yeah, it does happen often. I wonder if people do this on purpose to try to get into the news. Right.

Barney's running down the beach. He is holding her by the balls, which is very realistic. Let's not encourage dogs to do that. No, let's not encourage dogs like Barney To be holding it in that manner Barney's are very protective Because immediately when you see that You're like there's a killer dog

If it could take someone down They've also put pictures of Barney Guarding the baby and stuff at home So Barney's a loving caring dog Who just thought he'd found a chew toy Well nobody's wanting that back No you can put that in the bin. You can put that in the bin.

Those are today's community notices. If you see something on your local Facebook page, you can screen cap it and send it to us. We're FVMZM on Facebook. Play ZM's Fleshphone and Megan. Everything about this screams you too. A matchmaking astrologer has revealed which star signs are the most likely to cheat and ghost, among other things.

So it's taken into, like, love personality traits of each star sign. Oh, okay. Which zodiac? Chinese or traditional? Traditional? Whatever. I thought we were getting another. Which one will I believe?

The extra star sign? Yeah, I thought we were getting an extra. Anyway. Bagamaterius. Most likely the ghost is Pisces. That would be Vaughn Smith. Yeah. See, I'm a huge...

Ghost relationship. Oh, I thought you were talking about parties because I love ghosting a party. Because I've just stopped going. But surely that would be similar as well. You're also supposed to be the most open-minded. Definitely. I'd say both of those lean more towards Fletch.

When it comes to cheating, the most likely to cheat and the most fickle star sign is Aquarius, which is my husband. Who's currently away on tour. Shut up. God, what if he's hooking up with the penguins? Imagine the Madagascar scandal if that happened. Some of those penguins are like, no, don't talk about it. What about King Julian?

He's a lovely guy. What if King Puss and King Julian? No, I'm not imagining the guy. I'm just imagining the character. Oh, okay. Are they not in costume the entire time they're away? Oh, damn. What a bit of a good old bit of method acting.

You do feature on the list. You're a cancer, Fletch. You value romance the most. Yeah, that sounds like me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Huge romance guy. And I am apparently the most passionate. Leos are the most passionate.

I didn't even get a vomit sound from you. Any other star signs that made the list? Taking it slow when dating a Taurus. The people who jump into relationships headfirst is Aries. I don't know if that's necessarily a bad thing. But yeah, most fickle in relationships is Aquarius. And I think I covered Gemini and Libra are also very likely to cheat on you. Well, great.

You just made people argue probably over nothing. Yeah, yeah, if there are couples listening in the car. And Sagittarius and Scorpios are both saying, we haven't been mentioned. We haven't been mentioned. We should be mentioned. They're attention seekers, aren't they? Well, I don't know.

I just hadn't heard those two words, so I said something sort of broad and sweeping about people born in over a two-month period. You know what? They'll probably adhere to it because they're self-aggrandising and a little bit selfish. All right. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. What you're about to witness now is some padding.

Buffering. While we wait for the Prime Minister to call through. But we can use this moment now on the show to tell you what is coming up in the next half an hour. And Hilary Barry will join us to talk about her new TV show, which starts tonight on TVNZ1. It's charades on the telly. Yes. Yeah, it is.

Give us a clue. It's been on New Zealand television before. They've done Give Us a Clue. I remember as a young man watching the television. It was on at 7 o'clock, but it was on the other network. I don't remember it. It was what TV3 put up against Shortland Street. Now, one night, here's something that will blow your mind.

One night, because the main family television was on Shortland Street, so my brother and I would go and watch Give Us a Clue on TV3 on the 14-inch Panasonic television where you were lucky enough to have in our bedroom. Yeah, right. Now, one night, Michael Galvin and Timuera Morrison

were on Give Us a Clue at the same time as they were on Shortland Street and that blew a young man's mind. We're joined on the phone by the Prime Minister of New Zealand, Jacinda Ardern. Good morning. Good morning.

Thank you so much for joining us. Let's open, as we have started to do, a vibe check on the nation. Vibe check on the nation. Oh, gosh. Well, we had a cold nap, but we're equally still excited about the Olympics, perhaps. That'd be my vibe check at the moment. Yeah, it feels like that's wearing off. I need something else.

They haven't even all got home yet. But I'm hoping that people will take all of that positive energy and support and just roll it straight into the Paralympics as well. Yes, that's true. That starts soon, doesn't it? It does. A couple of weeks. A break between.

Now, a few people were without power this week, and rumours going around that you went through the electoral roll, found out who voted for National and flipped off their power specifically. I haven't heard that one. I did hear the one about that EVs were to blame. I can definitely tell you that is not the case. Okay. Yes.

You might have read the explanation that we've found yesterday. We had really a high point in terms of the energy, electricity use across the country because unusually in New Zealand, most of the time, if we have real cold snaps, they tend to affect certain parts of the country. We had everyone affected by a cold snap two nights ago. And so that did cause a surge in use. However, we should have been able to cope with that. We have enough generation that we should have been able to cope with that.

The problem we had is that not all our generators bought on all of their capacity. So Huntly, they could have fired up a bit more there, what they call the rank, and they could have bought online there, and it wasn't. So we are asking some hard questions of our generators to try and get to the bottom of what happened. With EVs, I've seen, and I have not, I've just seen this question asked. With the fact that most of our, we do have hydroelectric dams, but a lot of our power is still coal generated.

What's the difference, like what's the carbon footprint difference between running a modern petrol car versus charging your car off a network primarily powered by coal? Well, it's not primarily powered by coal. Well, I mean, I mean. New Zealand's electricity generation is actually pretty good. We can get as high as 85% of our electricity generated being renewable. The issue that we have is that it can dip a little bit lower, down to 80-ish percent, if we have a dry year

and if we don't have enough in our hydro dams. So that's been one of our issues. So we've been working on ways to overcome some of our storage issues so that we don't have to use fossil fuels as backup when we have dry years. But I was just looking yesterday, we've got a number of new solar, geothermal, wind generation coming on stream because our goal is to get to 100% renewable electricity generation, and New Zealand's got the capacity to do that.

When do you, when's that goal? Is that the 2025, 2030 or? 2030 and we've seen, take a look after at 2025, see, you know, how we're progressing towards it and whether, because some in the environmental space just argue that actually you'd get better bang for buck in the way that you spend your money if you get up to about 98% and then you spend, you know, extra money. It would take you to get to 100 on other things that are good for climate change. Some people argue that.

We've still kept the goal of getting to 100%, but we'll keep checking in on it. Cool. And, I mean, COVID's still knocking at the door at every opportunity. It's dressed up now. It's got a moustache on. It's like, I'm not COVID, I'm Delta variant. So tomorrow there's going to be, what was it called? The Roadmap to Freedom, which sounds...

We have, that is definitely not our title. It's such an American sounding. It's the Roadmap to Freedom and then an eagle swoops in. No, no, no, no. We've just called it reconnecting New Zealanders to the world, you know. Ah, that's right. And we always use much more boring names for things. What I'm going to do tomorrow is just talk about what the next six months look like

and how we prepare for, you know, just trying to reduce down some of the barriers that we've had to movement whilst keeping people safe. I think the really big message, though, right now is COVID hasn't finished changing yet. Delta is the current variant. It's probably not the only next version of it we'll see. So we just have to keep our options open as much as we can as we go because COVID will keep changing. As it has done.

Yeah. Yes, as it has done. Yep. Unfortunately, that's how pandemics operate. However, you know, the silver lining is vaccines, you know, help us protect ourselves against COVID. And I've heard some people say, oh, I'm not intending to travel. I don't need to be vaccinated.

That is definitely not the point. COVID is trying to get in at our borders every single day. And so we need to vaccinate our people to keep them safe and to reduce down the need for lockdown. So I hope that's a good motivation for people. The more vaccinated people we have,

the less likely it is we have to use restrictions like that. I reckon we need to keep the Olympic athletes in for three weeks because imagine how tough the variant would be if it got Carrington. It we have to use restrictions like that. I reckon we need to keep the Olympic athletes in for three weeks because imagine how tough the variant would be if it got Carrington. Like, it'd have to be such a tough COVID. In fact, they should call it the Carrington variant and it would just be like the quickest, most powerful, unstoppable. I'd just give in.

I don't think you can lock up a gold medalist for an extra week because of that. She deserves an extra week. She deserves an extra week. She deserves an extra week. Alright, well, good luck out there. Thank you. There is light at the end of the tunnel would be my message to everyone. See, I've given up hope.

I've completely given up hope. He's had four hours sleep. He's grumpy today. I've just given up. All hope's lost. I say we just, I don't know. I'm one jab in. Oh, yeah, Megan's half vaccinated. I'm half vaccinated.

Yeah. Great. And how did your first one go? How did the what go? The first one. Oh, fine. Well, she's obviously lost her hearing. No, I was fine.

Still here. Great. Didn't even hurt. Awesome. Fantastic. Thanks for joining us. Thanks, everyone. Take care. Onwards and upwards. Play ZM. Thanks for joining us. Thanks, everyone. Take care.

Onwards and upwards. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. This story I'm about to tell is also my, I want this entered. Yeah. As my reason I'm not staying for staff meeting. I want this officially on record as Wandsmith's reason for absolutely not staying for staff meeting today. Leaving work early. Was he in a late night?

Absolutely. It was just full on. So yesterday, pulled up outside the school for school pickup at 10 to 3. Yeah. And my phone rings

and it says underneath it because you know how when you get an email and it's got the signature, a phone number in the signature, your phone like scans through and it's like, maybe it's these people. That's amazing. That always freaks me out.

I love it. Maybe it's the school office is what it said. I kind of like that because otherwise I wouldn't answer it. Because you know all those calls at the moment and it's like scam calls. Yeah. So maybe it's the school office. I'm like, hello, Vaughn speaking. Yep. Hi, Vaughn.

It's Ange here from the school office. And I said Vaughan speaking Yep Hi Vaughan It's Ange here From the school office And I said Hello Ange What have my children done? Which one of my children Has done something? Yeah

And she said Indy has taken a fall And I said Well I'm parked right outside She said She's in the sick bay I said How bad is it?

And she said It's not good So and I trot and I walk in. Hello. Hello. Pleasant trees. Look in the sick bay. Indy's got her arm in a sling.

She's very upset. Okay. And I said, sweetheart, how did this happen? And she looked at me and she looked into my eyes and she knew she'd broken dad's number one rule because every parent has a rule. It's the thing as a parent that you find yourself saying multiple times a week

I'm very lucky because my children aren't like fire starters like don't play with those matches they know not to play with fire starting things which is surprising because when I was a kid I was the fire starter mum was constantly like don't flip those matches don't play with that don't flip those matches. Don't play with that. Don't light

those things on fire. My number one dad rule is don't run on concrete. That is I find I say it at least once a week. I pick up the girls from school and August comes running down the school driveway with a massive backpack on that's like every step she takes is like whoa!

I'm like stop! And I'll like wave my arms from 100 metres away being like, don't run on the concrete. And the other parents kind of like look at me and I look around. I'm like, look, sorry, but I don't care. Don't run on the concrete. I say it constantly at home. They'll get out of the car and they'll run for the front door.

I'm like, don't run on the concrete. And I don't know. It's my thing. It freaks me out. And you see a kid running and they get their arms and their legs and they'll run for the front door. I'm like, don't run on the concrete. And I don't know. It's my thing. It freaks me out. And you see a kid running and they get their arms and their legs and they're flailing everywhere. Yeah. Oh, it just gives me the heebie-jeebies. Well, she ran on the concrete.

She broke dad's rule. She said, we were playing tag on the concrete. Oh. I was like, you don't. And I went, you don't. Now's not the time. Yeah. I don't like And I went, you don't. Now it's not the time. Yeah.

I don't want to put my time. She needs a cuddle. She was upset. So we walked to the car, she said, and she just told me they were playing tag on the concrete. She stood on a stone and it threw her off balance and she fell and she landed on her wrist. And I was like, give us a look. And I did that thing where you just kind of like open the little sling

they put on and you look and you're like, that's definitely broken. Could you see a bump? I could see the slight change in angle midway down the, just above the wrist. Between, probably about three quarters of the way toward the wrist from the elbow. So it was off. This wouldn't have happened if they were on the grass playing tag.

Bingo. It probably could still have happened She'd have a moody elbow Yeah And that'd be all She'd be like I got my uniform dirty Yeah And I'd be like

That's washable At least you weren't running on the concrete Breaking my number one dad rule Yeah So then it was off to an emergency place And they're like oh yeah you're getting an x-ray And then she got an x-ray And then they were like oh yeah it's broken

And it's going to need to be like clicked back in. So you have to go to the joys of joys of public hospital emergency department where we arrived at our local one and it was a four-hour wait up on the screen. They have a screen that tells you how long. Yeah. What about Shortland Street? Is that near you? Yeah, called Chris.

Yeah. Not in, not in. Yeah. Not in. Not in. Okay. So anyway, we went into Starship, and I can't speak highly enough of Starship. I think every hospital, adult hospital, should be more like Starship Hospital.

And I said that to a lady whose job was to go around and tell kids what was going to be happening. Because initially they were going to have to give Indy gas, but then they're like, we might actually have to do a ketamine. And I was just like, I can call in sick tomorrow. Let's see what happens. But then I remembered I'm getting the drug that killed Michael Jackson on Monday.

So I thought I'd save my drug experience for the week for Monday. Yeah. For your colonoscopy. For my propofol. No. Propofol? Propofol, yeah. He had fentanyl.

Yeah, that didn't work. God, that barely touched the sides. And I felt it touch the sides, actually. Yeah. Because it didn't work. But so, and this lovely lady's job was to explain to kids, like, what's going to happen. And Indy was terrified of needles. But after this lady explained and showed her what was going to happen, she was like, oh, okay, I prefer that over the gas.

They're so wonderful. Like whenever we've gone in for a work thing. Oh, my God. I can't speak. Yeah. And it's just like brightly coloured and there's like a TV playing cartoon network and it's just like why can't adult hospitals, you go into an adult hospital, it's all sterile and colourless

and the only thing you hear is like beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. I don't know if that's a good beep or a bad beep. They know. No, it's a good beep because in the – Yeah, that's the bad one. That's the bad beep. You want your beeps to be pulsing. Yeah, you want your heart rate.

You want a constant beep. So then it turns out after a few more look-ats that she didn't need the ketamine. Okay. Didn't get to take that home, just for anyone wondering. And she got the gas. She was a bit worried about that, but then that was pretty funny.

She started huffing on nos. She was like, Mum, does that doctor have three eyes? Shana was like, no, that's just the gas. She's like, okay. And then when they were like... So what, do they just go to a dairy

and ask them for like some cream canisters? Yes, that's exactly what the public health system does. They walk in and the nurse is out there going, I'm going to make a cake and I need nitrous oxide for my creamery, my creamer. And the person at the dairy rolls their eyes and goes, of course, that's what you're doing. Yeah, that'd be right. So, yeah, she was on the NOS. And then when they were like, okay, you probably can stop that now.

I wasn't there because only one parent was allowed in apparently. And then she went. Just got a good load of it before she came out. But, yeah, so she's broken her arm. And it was flavoured. Yeah, so that was. August told me this because when they went into the procedure room, August and I went and tried to sleep in the car.

And that's why I've got this like bong shoulder today. Hang on to a Santa face. You can't sleep sideways across the back seat if you're 6'2", that's for sure. Bong shoulder. And August said, did you know Indy's gas is flavoured? I was like, beg your pardon? She said, yeah, she had to pick a flavour, but she couldn't. So I picked strawberry because there was no chocolate.

Where was the flavoured gas when I was in labour? I could have had some strawberry. Where are the flavoured nangs at the dairy? Could have really done with some strawberry nops. Yeah, I'm going to cream a cake. Do you have the strawberry flavour? Yeah, I think that's something St. John's should look into in their ambulances.

Like, you know, you're on your way to the hospital, they're like woo, woo, woo. They're like, okay, raspberry on your way to the hospital, they're like, woo, woo. They're like, okay, raspberry, strawberry, lime. And then it's like, woo, woo, woo. Woo, woo, woo. Woo, woo, woo. Just it would be nice to choose.

Yeah. Just strawberry. It's boys and berries. I'm new to the berry. I need more. That felt oddly so real. Well, we've all been to a hospital, Megan. Flashback.

But yeah, so we got over quarter to 12 last night. So from quarter to three to quarter to 12 was the Smith emergency. Did they click it back in? And now she's got a cast. So they had to massage the arm. They didn't have to click it in the end because apparently the gas isn't a heavy enough sedation for that. So they had to hold it and then massage a cast

specifically to shape to hold it straight. Okay. And I tell you what, I must apologise to the house-moving crew we came across last night. My temper was in absolute shortness of breath. What house-moving crew? They told me I had to get off the road.

I said, you get off the effing road. They said, there's a house coming. You need to get off the road. I was like... Oh, a house moving, like a whole house. Yeah, a house just going on the back of the truck. And this guy's like waving this glow stick at me. And I'm like, yo.

And he's like, you need to get off the road. A house is coming. I was like, I'm not getting off the effing road. You get off the effing road. And then I was like, moon. And then this other truck came screaming around. And the kids are like, dad. I was like, I am getting home.

Too bad. Wow, she doesn't cope without sleep, eh? She does not. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. We are joined in studio by the star of TV One's Give Us a Clue, Hilary Barry. Hello. Hello, everybody.

I don't know that I'm the star, but thanks very much. I'll take it. You're one of the stars, shall we say. You are a team leader. Tom Sainsbury is a team leader, and I believe this is her first TV gig Paula Bennett Yeah, she's the host

She's the one keeping us all on track She actually should have been Speaker of the House To be honest She's like a really, really tough headmistress She can control the whole situation Well, she can control me And that takes a bit of doing When I'm arguing with someone

Because I'm a stickler for the rules Yeah right I am a stickler for the rules Particularly when it comes to board games That sort of thing Oh yep Have you ever flipped a board? Yep

Does your family have a board game you can't play? Yep What one? Monopoly I am This is the most awkward thing about doing this show, right? Because my nearest and dearest know what I'm like with board games. And my kids are going,

Mum, you can't keep your real competitive personality under wraps on this show. Yeah. Because I am the one who gets really annoying and competitive over board games. So the game that we can't play is Pictionary and we haven't played it for years, long before the kids came along because one family Christmas with Mike's family,

I was so obnoxious over the Pictionary set that I actually called my brother-in-law the next day to apologise. Oh, wow. I was that badly behaved and to this day,

I'm still embarrassed but he was terrible and he needed taking down. Was he cheating? No, he was just terrible at the game. And so I told him that he was hopeless. And yeah, it was just not appropriate for, you know, a family Christmas. So I had to apologise. Is there any truth to the rumour

that you choked out one of the top twins during the filming of the show? Well, let's... I don't even know what choked out means. Like this. Okay, so my mind immediately went, I went smut. Sorry.

There was a bit of niggle. Yes, there's definitely niggle between the top twins and me. God. They were joking. And one of them, I don't know which Ken it was, it was one of the Kens, was hitting on me in the green room. And, you know, and then, you know, being all nice and sly behind the scenes.

And then when they got on stage, being, you know, really rude. So, you know, there was definitely niggle. Is there anyone that you think you should call and apologise to? Well, there was one particular episode where I turned on my entire team because it's a quick fire round and they were just too slow. And I was yelling at them all. And I got off and I went to the producer. I said, I don't know how you're going to edit that because I'm going to come across as just such a bitch.

But anyway, so that episode's coming up. Good. I like this though. I want to see the clean cut stuff. I want to see anger because it is. If anybody's playing parlor games at home, you know. Who doesn't love a parlor game? I love it when Hillbaz gets fired up too. We get inklings of it on social media, but I want to see it.

Yeah, the full-blown angry Hills. It certainly comes out in one episode. What about that Hillary we saw the other night with regards to the BSA complaint from the anti-vax community? How would you describe that? Because that wasn't full-blown angry Hills. That was kind of... That was like dripping

in sarcasm hills. Sarky, yeah. Yeah. Look, do you know what? She does come out on occasion. Particularly when you've got adult kids. You can't discipline your kids anymore once they're adults. But generally that

dripping in sarcasm hills will come out when I think they haven't behaved particularly well. So it's not a telling off, but it's just very clear how I really feel. Right. Had to want some sarcasm. Who was the, over the course of the series, who was the best at Give Us A Clue? Who got what you were putting across?

There was one team in particular that were right on target super competitive so it was Bernice Mene, Stacey Morrison, Tony Street and moi and I tell you what if I could

take those chicks into battle I would Wonderful wahine Yeah amazing wahine toa and yeah, we were a very strong team. Right. We'll watch out for that episode. The stars aligned. Answer, answer, answer. We were just

onto it. Take that, males. Tony Street, she's a pit bull. Is she ever? I mean, comes across like a marshmallow, but no, no, no. Bulls of steel. She slashed my tyres. We've got a thing. I'm too scared to a marshmallow, but no, no, no. Balls of steel. She slashed my tyres. We've got a thing. I'm too scared to stray back, but last week she slashed my tyres. You know what?

Knowing Tony, I'm not surprised. No. Others will be surprised at that. I'm not. Yeah. Not Vaughan. No, just straight in with a screwdriver. Yeah.

Or a knife that she carries around. I'm not sure how she did it. I haven't raised the issue with the police. I don't need to get them involved because then obviously she'll come for my family. Yeah. She's not like that. So it starts tonight.

I'll just move on because now I'm a little bit scared she'll hear about this even. And now I want to drag you into this. No, no, no, no. Please don't. I've got my own issues to deal with. Yeah, yeah.

Terrifying, terrifying. So tonight it starts 7.30, TV One, Give Us a Clue, starring Hilary Barry, Tom Sainsbury and Paula Bennett. Thanks for coming in. Thanks. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's fact of the day is about onions. Okay. Delicious onions. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Man, the Latin just need to lay off these fancy words. Onions. Much easier to say. Yeah. Falling into the same genus as chives. Love of chives. Garlic, of course. Spring onion.

Leeks might surprise you. Yes. Spring onions as well. The fact of the day is in ancient Greece, before their sort of like Olympics or gladiatorial games. With Russell Crowe. They believed onions were the perfect food to eat before fighting. Oh. They were raw.

What, to get your opponent like stanky breath? I don't know, the stanky breath. But not only were they encouraged to eat onions, they were encouraged to be massaged with onion juice. Oh, God. You'd just be crying. Oh, that sounds hideous. What if you had any, like, cuts from previous fights? What if they've had onion juice?

An onion juice in a cut? Oh, babes, it's awful. It's just akin to a lemon juice in a cut. Is it? Oh, I had no idea. Yeah. I've never noticed the onion to be that juicy. I mean, a nice, fresh, you know, onion, it fries up and I guess like when you're cutting

it, it's what comes off it that gets in your eyes that makes it stink. But yeah, now that you think about it, maybe like the stinky breath, but also if you were massaged with onion juice, if you like got an arm into the eye, that would cause some burning sensation. But yeah, they believed it to be, they called it the fighting food, onions. And that have a big feeder. Mind you, if you ever walked into the house and all that's in the fry pan is onions and garlic and you're like, man, that smells good.

I do it every time. Man, that smells good. That is just onions and garlic. Well, serve it to me on a piece of bread with a sausage over the top and some mustard as well. Yeah. So today's fact of the day is before the ancient Olympics and ancient gladiatorial fight.

I know gladiators were more of like an ancient Roman thing, but the Greeks had the arena fighting as well before I'm corrected. Which ones kissed? Both of them. Everybody. All of them. Romans. Yeah.

But more charity. Yeah. Not charity Charity Yep They had their aqueducts Yep Togas

Yep Togas were also Greek Yep Everybody was kissing Each other That's good Okay good history Kissing

Boys were kissing boys Yep Girls were kissing girls Girls were kissing boys Boys were kissing girls Everybody was smooching Yeah Yeah. Everybody was smooching. Yeah, good. Everybody was smooching.

They had like a... It's one of those vases that aren't on the vases. Oh, they're wild. They're wild. At times they get told off in classical studies with those vases.

Yeah. And you know how we have like a minister of finance. They had like a god of finance. You know, we've got all these ministers that take care of different things. They had gods for everything.

I've got to imagine Grant Robertson on a vase. Would you see it? Would it be out? You would. Because, you know, they were quite always out. Absolutely, you'd see it. And quite large.

There you go. You're welcome for that mental picture. Now, next time he's on the news being like, yeah, this is where we're at. I'm going to be like, imagine that fellow on a vase. There you go. You're welcome. With it out. No comment. Chris Hipkins on the vase. Next time go, you're welcome. With it out. No comment.

Chris Hipkins on the vase. The COVID vase update. He's up there with his wang out. Oh yes, and 2,000 years later they're like, yes, this is a vase depicting a press conference regarding a pandemic that was sweeping through ancient Greece

at the time. This is the naked god of health giving an update. And this is demigod Ashley Bloomfield. that was sweeping through ancient Greece at the time. This is the naked god of health. Giving an update. And this is demigod Ashley Bloomfield. Also naked, but behind a podium. So hiding it, you know, this kind of guy he was. He was a little bit. Well, I think we've all got enough visuals now of seeing current and post ministers.

Jerry Brownlee would have been on a vase for the earthquake recovery in 2010. Imagine Jerry Brownlee's vase. That a vase for the earthquake recovery in 2010. Imagine Jerry Brownlee's vase. That would have been a vase and a half. Helen Clark's vase. Let's move on. Let's move on. I don't want any comments.

I'm not commenting. Pick your favourite politician in your mind and imagine them painted in Greek style. Naked on a vase. With all the bits out. Maybe covered by an olive leaf. Yeah. If they're lucky. So, naked on a vase. With all the bits out. Okay. Maybe covered by an olive leaf. Yeah. If they're lucky. So, not an olive leaf.

That's a very small leaf. Grape leaf. That's a leaf. That wouldn't cover anything, would it? And if it did, you probably wouldn't make it to the vase. Because they always had a big wang on the old vase. Anyway, today's fact of the day is Greeks considered onions the perfect fighting food. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Yummy, yummy. A segment of the show, we take a look at new food trends, food items. Is it hitting shelves? Oh, we got the... Oh, dare I say it, things we don't really need? Um, excuse me. Excuse me. We'll eat them anyway.

Oh, yeah, totally. We want them, but we don't need them. Honorary mention. It's not like I've invented a new carrot or anything. Wow, yeah. When was the last time it was a new vegetable, you know? Never, never. Honorary mention. It's not like they've invented a new carrot or anything. When was the last time it was a new vegetable, you know? Never, never. Honorary mention, before we get into this new food item,

Air New Zealand sent us the new lollies. Is it the black currant? Black currant, yeah. Yeah. Sent us a box of those yesterday. So they've come to all of those. That was a massive box. They're out there in the kitchen.

Yeah. You won't know, Executive Internania, they do lollies before landing on this Air New Zealand. Do Club Jetstar do that? No, sadly not. They will make you do the Jetstar jump at the same time, don't they? So that it pushes the plane towards the ground a bit more. It's good for cardio.

Was it Black Current lollies? It was indeed. Okay, well, those will be rolling out. They're yuck, eh, Carwen? No, they're so yum. Are you kidding? Carwen didn't like them. You didn't like them?

I didn't like them. Are they more of a liquid? No, they're blackcurrant. What's your problem with them? I'm lucky there's lots of other flavours. I don't know, they just... You don't have to like them. It's not Ribena, I don't want it.

Ribena! Okay, yeah, I don't know if rye bean Is the measuring stick For Blackcurrant Blackcurrant flavours What else is The fruit No one ever eats

Blackcurrants Nah yeah you're right No one ever eats Blackcurrants No but I feel like Lolly I've never even seen Blackcurrants

Blackcurrants available I live in Golden Bay There's blackcurrant bushes Everywhere Yeah okay But there's also like a ton of crime. So not everybody wants to live there. Well, this comes to us from the UK.

And Mars have launched their first ever chocolate spread. Now, Cadbury have been doing this for a while. Cadbury, you can get like a crunchy spread, a caramel spread, all kinds of caramel. I think they do it. Look at you. You're melting. You know, obviously you get your classic Nutellas, but this is a Mars bar.

So it makes caramel. So what's in a Mars bar? Caramel nougat? Yeah, and milk chocolate through the jar. So you can see the swirl in there. And that's launching on August 12th in the UK. So I'd imagine it will come here. No one's spreading that on anything, are they?

Oh, you're just thinking they're fingering straight into their mouth. The picture that... Oh, pancakes. A crepe. Pancakes, waffles and crepes. It'd be great on a crepe. Sorry, apologies. Now, we're just sort of this pandemic because I need to get back to Thailand for some of them crepes.

You know that there are crepes in New Zealand, right? You know how expensive they are here? I could eat a thousand crepes in Thailand. Yeah, but your airfare will cost a thousand dollars. Yeah, but it'd still cost less than eating a thousand crepes here. Okay, fair call. Yep. There we go.

What are they about? So, no, serious maths. We went to a crepe place and it was like 10 bucks for an entry-level crepe. In Thailand, you get a crepe for about a was like 10 bucks for an entry level crepe. In Thailand, you get a crepe for about a buck ten. Okay. That's 10 times the cost.

So how many crepes do I have to eat in Thailand to make the airfare worth it is what I'm saying. A lot. Like you'd have to move and have a crepe a day. I could eat a hundred crepes.

I could eat a hundred crepes. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Oh my God, this has just absolutely made my day. Don't poop on it, okay? I've just seen this report. Two Pants of Friends? No, wait.

They're doing a new series. No, no, no. They are, they're doing a new series. Wait, I'm gonna nail the clap. Okay. No! Every time I do the extra one, don't I? Four claps. So, this news has just come out.

It's from Sources. Jo, can you isolate the clap part in your Pro Tools? Let's get a definitive answer and see how many peaks there are. You'll be able to see the clap. This has been news, the claps. Four claps. They've settled this. Four claps. Why did you clap five This has been news, the claps. Four claps. They've settled this. Four claps.

Why did you clap five times then? Because he's special. I don't know, because I can't clap four times. I can't even clap. I don't know how to stop. Five claps there. One, two, three, four. Okay, go again with this one.

Wet. No! You did it. Four claps. No. I think you four clappers just can't clap, Kokona. It's four clap. I clap slow.

You're just going to have the... I'm shadowing this amazing news. This is from Sources. It hasn't been confirmed by Reeps. They're Reeps. Reeps. They're Reeps. Did I say funny? You said Reeps. Ross and Rachel are dating in real life.

They cannot be. This is rubbish. Jennifer Aniston and David Schwimmer, apparently after the Friends reunion, they were like, yeah, and they told everyone how they originally had. Shut up, Silly. That actually was.

Your face said it all. But there was a bombshell on the reunion that they actually would have dated if they weren't. And it reignited feelings they had. They have been spotted together at her favourite winery in Santa Barbara and apparently it was clear there was lots of chemistry

between them. They were deep in conversation and... I don't... but they're friends. Of course there's chemistry. I mean, I didn't see them smooching but... We don't have that kind of chemistry. If we went to a winery together, there's not going to be any rumours like Megan and Fletch were like, they had chemistry. If people looked over at us and we were having a good old jolly laugh, they'd be like, look

at the chemistry. No, different. It doesn't mean we're hooking up. It's not like we're having a DNM and gazing into each other's eyes. Why don't you do DNMs with you? You have a couple of wines and it's blah, blah, blah. It's true. But apparently't you do DNMs with you? You have a couple of wines and it's blah, blah, blah. It's true. But apparently,

there's that famous chemistry. He flew from New York to LA to hang out with her and they were like cooking and this is the perfect time to do it

because like, people aren't going out as much, they're not going to see them. Yeah, right. Okay, well, I guess we'll see how

this plays out over the next few days. Here's her crayfish. Lobster. Crab. It was lobster. It was lobster, yeah. ZM's Flesh Warner Megan.