ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 12th March 2021

Episode Date: March 12, 2021

The top 6 ways to get people to pay the MIQ bills, bakery of the day and what is your kissing injury?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleet Morning Megan with Hayley Sproul podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Download the Maccas app to get McCafe rewards today. Stop it! Look, I was going to talk about something else. I'm going to save it for later because just as I said, I know what we can talk about. I saw this in the personals in the New Zealand Herald. I've circled it. See? This is the chat. I thought you were talking about that vehicles wanted dead or alive. Wanted dead or alive and it's a flipped car.

That was quite a funny ad. This is in the personal column, so it still blows my mind that people put ads in the personal. Because they pay for these. Excuse me, Vaughan. That is our company's newspaper. It is a great that people advertise in the classifieds. If you'd like a classified, go to nzherald.co.nz or something. Now, this isn't a problem that I read this out because this is in a public forum.

Yeah. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. Forum. A public forum.

Public forie. A public foreskin. It says personal. Companion is in bold. Oh, okay. Hi, my name's Paul from Haast. G'day, Paul. I'm looking.

Haast. Haast. Haast Pass. Huh? The Haast Pass. The Haast Pass. Haast. Very desolate place.

Isolated. I wouldn't say desolate. That makes it sound like it's post-apocalyptic. It's pisces. I drove through Haast Pass. The Haast Pass. Very desolate place. Isolated. I wouldn't say desolate. That makes it sound like it's post-apocalyptic. I drove through Haast Pass recently and it was beautiful. Paul from Haast. I'm looking for a companion to enjoy the America's Cup with on my friend's yacht. Maybe resulting in long-term relationship. Must have yachting experience and be willing to learn how to whitebait and manage camping ground.

Now, do we have to sleep with Paul? Because I would love a yacht. I want to learn to whitebait. I want to learn to whitebait, although I know environmentally we're over whitebaiting, aren't we? There's not going to be enough whitebait left for everybody. But I could manage a camping ground. I could be the elf steward of Haast.

Does he specify sexual preference or is it come one, come all? It doesn't specify gender preference. Well, he said he wants a long-term relationship, so you'd imagine with that would come sexy time. Is he simply looking for a companion to help him man this yacht of his friends that may indeed be a two-person job?

Well, I'm not going out to watch the America's Cup and then moving my whole life to Haas and he doesn't want to be with me forever. Sexually. Yeah, I wouldn't go on a first date on a boat where you're literally, there's no land. watching America's Cup and then moving my whole life to Haas and he doesn't want to be with me forever sexually. Yeah, I wouldn't go on a first date on a boat where you're literally, there's no land. There's implications. Yeah.

There's implications that they may be in danger. Yeah. You're on a boat. Yeah. Just the two of you. There's not danger. No one's in danger, but there's implications. Were you just going to suggest taking a flare gun?

Yes. That's when you know dating is out of control. All right. I've got my good undies on. Yeah. Mum knows where I am and I've got a flare gun. That's when you know dating is out of control. When you go take a flare gun. I've got my good undies on. Mum knows where I am and I've got a flare gun. I've turned on Find My Friends, although my phone's not waterproof, so if I end up in the drink, that'll quickly blip off. Sending my last known location.

Anyway, if you're into it, it's in the hero. Do you never answer the question straight or gay or why? No, it doesn't say. It doesn't say. It just says companion. Does it say, like, how big his dick is says companion. Does it say how big his dick is? I was going to say how big his yacht is. No, because if it does, that'll be a gay.

That'll be gay. Is there a picture of his thumbs up next to a picture of his dick? No, this is the paper, not the internet. It's not Grindr. If you're going to waste money putting it in the paper, just put more money in and put a photo in.

I think it is more of a personal thing because then the next column is adult entertainment. So it might just want to be. Absolutely blissful tantric balancing. Accessible. Two or four hands available. Two or four hands available? I want four. Oh, yeah.

Who's going to take two when there's four? No, remember you had a four-hand massage once. Lovely. You loved it, didn't you? I haven't had a four, but I would love a four. I'd do it again. Oh, hang on. You guys have four hands between you.

Go on. I'll lay on the desk. I'll go get the margarine out of the fridge. You know you've skimmed on the massage place when they bring out the olivine. You know that plastic sound that margarine lids make when they come off? It's like, pop, pop, pop.

And then you hear them peeling off the skin. The top, the baking thing. And you get a little bit over there and then... And then you smell like a sandwich. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul. Today from our Christchurch studios. The back cupboard.

Yep. Broadcasting studio. Hayley, yourself and our Auckland studio. We are spread wide. Yes. You said around, I said wide.

Same thing. Same thing. Long and wide. It was a big night. We've had very little sleep. I don't want to tick myself up as a big night. That was a medium night for Smithy.

Was it? Okay. And everyone scoffed at me when I was stealing the delicious almonds from the bar. I'm smuggling them out. But I tell you what, who had almonds? We all nibbled those on the way home, didn't we? We sure did. What do you mean you were stealing the almonds?

Were you just pouring them into your pockets? Almonds. So I poured them into my sweatshirt and then in where like a pouch like a kangaroo pouch. Yeah. And then I folded that over and tucked it into my pants. Right. I feel like. I mean they would have been absolutely fine with me taking the almonds.

There's better foods to eat after a big night out than some stolen almonds. Well that was the only thing left. Yeah. To be honest. Right. For the walk home. Yeah. It was all I needed. Some delicious almonds. Well, that was the only thing left, to be honest. Right. For the walk home. It was all I needed. Some delicious almonds. But a fantastic night last night with Banger's Bingo, Wall Street. Thank you

so much for hosting us. Tonight in Hokitika, ahead of the Wild Foods Festival, which we're going to tomorrow. So, yeah. Yeah. We're going to have to do this two nights in a row. I didn't think about that last night. That's why I went medium. Funnelling those cocktails. Two mediums. Yeah, Yeah. So yeah. Yeah, we're going to have to do this two nights in a row, aren't we? No. I didn't think about that last night when we were funneling those cocktails. Two mediums.

Yeah, right. The same as one big and one small. Yeah, second night you always have to have like a cider or a gentle beer, you know? I'm not having a cider. I'm a gentleman. All right. I'll have a dry martini, please. Followed by a shot of port.

All right, the top six is coming up. Yeah, do you know there, hello there, New Zealand taxpayer, that managed isolation facilities? You know how if you're a Kiwi, you could come home? Yep. But if you're a Kiwi coming home for less than three months, you had to pay, or if you left the country and came back, you had to pay? Yeah.

Well, that bill's ticking up. Yeah. $20 million. Oh, wow, okay. Do you not have to pay up front? I thought you would have had to. I Yeah. Well, that bill's ticking up. Yeah. $20 million. Oh, wow. Okay. Do you not have to pay up front? I thought you would have had to. Yeah.

But apparently they do like, you know when you buy a couch and they're like, 24 months interest free. Oh, no. Pay now and then pay the rest. Well, can you put it on your Q-kit? I don't know.

Maybe they do. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. But with $20 million owing, I've got the top six ways to start clawing some of that cash back. All right, that's coming up along with our secret sound. All thanks to Star Streaming on Disney+.

7 o'clock, 8 o'clock this morning, your next chance is to win that $40,000 cash. But next on the show... A mother online is gaining notoriety for the bills that she's distributing to her 7-year-old. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Mums, I tell you what,

is TikTok ready to not be like the cool social media now? Because mums are really taking it. And not that mums aren't cool, but you know, when it was predominantly populated by a very young demographic who were trying to get away from their mums

and would say stuff like, ma'am, ma'am, here we go, ma'am. Well, that's the evolution of online, isn't it, really? It starts out being young, hip and cool. I also feel like lots of companies use it now. Yeah. Like every company has a talk. Was there a talk of funeral homes?

Did someone give you a funeral home talk? And they did a disclaimer at the end. Yeah. And they were like, one thing you'll never see on here is a dead body. And you're like, no. That's the only reason I'm following you. Show me the dead bodies. Yeah, come on.

Give us a tease. Well, a mum on TikTok has said she's teaching a seven-year-old the value of money because she pays her if she does her chores. She earns a little pocket money, but then she also charges her to live in the house. Like rent? Yeah. So she's trying to teach her that money just doesn't flow in.

It also flows out. I get that that's cool, but at the same time, you don't need a seven year old worrying and stressing about the pressures of paying the power bill. And then they fall behind on rent and mum kicks them out. How old is this kid? Seven.

No. You start charging your kids rent after they leave high school. Yeah, to get them to move out, right? So she gets $7 for all of her chores, if she does all of her chores, and then she has to pay a dollar for food, a dollar for electricity, a dollar for internet, a dollar for rent, and a dollar for water. So she pays $5

and bills, and then she's got two left over that she can save or keep. I mean, she hasn't even accounted for tax there. I'll take another dollar for tax. When's mum going to introduce buy now, pay later? Some kind of scheme. Let's her tick it up. I've take another dollar for tax. When's mum going to introduce buy now, pay later? Yeah. Some kind of scheme. Let's tick it up.

I've got a bit of an IOU situation with my parents. It's racking up at about a million at the moment. Right. Is that where you take their money, but you never pay it back? Yeah. I mean, look, I'm an actor. I went to drama school. I wasn't earning any money.

So you just went to the bank of mum and dad for a long-term low interest loan. Yeah, you always have to have that awkward conversation where you're like, hey, and you pretend you're interested in their day for a bit before you work up the courage. But they know. But they always, they know. They're like, how much do you need? Yeah, what do you need? Oh, I just got my power bill. How much is it?

And they transfer it to the dollar. Oh, really? I just got my power bill. How much is that? And they'd transfer it to the dollar. No more. Oh, really? Should they not just be paying it directly to the power company to ensure that you are paying your power bill and not just going on one of your acting drug binges? Do all actors still doing drugs nonstop? No, everyone's cleaned up these days.

Yeah, good. Wow. Right, okay. No wonder movies have gone to shit. No, no. I want some more Coke-fueled movies that they made in the 80 shit. No, no. I want some more Coke-fueled movies that they made in the 80s. Like Top Gun.

Yeah. But people are divided. They're like, what, you shouldn't be doing this to a seven-year-old. Oh, my daughter, Indy's class is doing a money thing at school. Okay, she's nine. Yeah. So they get money assigned by the teacher, but then they get money deducted for renting their desk and stuff.

Renting your desk? And then they did a test and they applied for different jobs. So the different jobs earn different amounts of money. And there's fines if you don't push in your chair. Really? Those sorts of things. So I sat down with her. I was like, okay, can you transfer money to other students?

And she's like, yeah, you can buy things and stuff. I was like, okay, can you transfer money to other students? And she's like, yeah, you can buy things and stuff. I was like, all right. And pretty much I invented a class-wide Ponzi scheme. I was going to say, Daddy's got a Ponzi scheme, and he needs all your money. Daddy's read a couple of books about people who are in prison for a long time, but I think we can win this classroom challenge. It's called a Ponzi scheme.

That, or we get a pyramid scheme. Yeah. And then when there's only like 20 kids, pyramids get, they're pretty short pyramids. They are. All right. ZM's Fletch Warner-Megan, the podcast. Director of Health. Is that his, what's his title?

The Director General of Health. Yeah. Dr. Ashley Bloomfield is in a little bit of hot water because he went to the cricket in Wellington on Sunday. Australia, New Zealand, and we won the series. Why shouldn't he enjoy a day at the cricket, especially when it ends in a triumphant New Zealand video? Why isn't he allowed to go to the cricket? Well, Hayley, stand by.

So he got free tickets, and then when he was there, he was lobbied by the head of cricket because they want the vaccines, because they're going to London, some of the players are going to the IPL in India, and there's obviously that debate at the moment on whether sports people and sports teams should get the Pfizer vaccine

ahead of, say, people that need it, elderly people, the vulnerable. Yeah, I'm still waiting for that because it's Marching Nationals next weekend, so I want to know if I'm going to be able to get the vaccine next week. Well, it takes, like, you get it, and and then you got to wait two weeks or three weeks. And then you got to wait two weeks.

You're screwed. On behalf of elite athletes. Thanks very much. Thanks for nothing. Is marching elite athletes? Yeah. That would have been better if we were in the same studio and I could see your face while I was riling you up. You are riling me up.

You are stoking the fire. But no, there's a, so there are obviously rules with public servants and these kind of positions. If you get a gift, you've got to register it. Now, he did that, but he's since said that, yeah, in the future I probably won't do that.

Because every day I'm the director of... He wasn't, you know, turning himself off. Guys, we've got to trust him. I don't think it would have swayed his opinion a few hours at the cricket. Well, I think Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern has said there's no ill intent. No. I don't think he was...

I mean, he could probably pay for his own tickets, couldn't he? Oh, gosh. I hope no one makes him feel bad about this. No, we don't need that. No. He's still a vital part in our fight against COVID-19. This is classic New Zealand. Let's tear him down.

He's made a minor, minor mistake. Why didn't we get a ticket to the cricket? Oh, yeah. And anyone else, if they got something free at work, would take it. Yeah. I myself take things that I'm not even entitled to. Like printer paper. I know you do.

Office chairs. Those plants, those indoor plants. Hayley took a entitled to, like printer paper. I know you do. Office chairs, those plants, those indoor plants. Hayley took a whole ream of printer paper and she's not even a full-time employee. Excuse me. Okay. Yes, I did. Yes, I did. I took a whole new packet of paper.

But here's how that exchange went down. Aaron, can you grab me 20 sheets of paper from work? I thought, yeah, that won't be too bad. And then you, Fletch, were like, come with me. And then you told me to put it in my bag and hide it. Yeah, because now you've broken the law. I've got something over you. Yeah, yeah.

He's implicated. Well, actually, Fletch, you're implicated too. I've got the security footage. I've got that. You're an accessory to this crime. There's no camera. I'm not actually in any of the footage. I was just outside of camera shot the whole time. I committed the perfect footage. I've got that. You're an accessory to this crime. There's no camera. Oh, actually, I'm not actually in any of the footage. I was just outside

of camera shot the whole time. I committed the perfect crime. You two are constantly trying to mislead me in this job. Trying to take me onto the dark path

and push my luck. I'm a good girl. All right. The top six is next. It's the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills. Is it how much?

20 million? Yeah, 20 million owing for people who have had to pay for managed isolation facilities. All right. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. From the majestic ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Just reading a bit more about when racing's on this afternoon. Not quite enjoyed last time. You guys have both really been hooked in, haven't you, to the racing?

I know. I didn't think I'd get excited about it. And then I tuned in for the second race. It was very close. The graphics are very exciting. The graphics really tickled me. They've got the helicopters up for all the shots, all the onboard cameras. That creaky noise that they all make.

Sounds like a zombie. I know, it's like a sound when there's a shocking moment in a horror movie. But no crashes. Nah, boo, more in there. There was one at the start of the second race, I thought they were going to barge each other. I was like, that would actually add a lot to this. Anyway, the top six, not about America's Cup, the top six today

are $20 million owed by people for their stays in managed isolation facilities. So I've had, I've had over the course of some of three, I know three people

that have come back for like more than a month just to see the family. Yeah, but less than three months, which is what you need to be coming back for. And they said, they all told me they paid,

but I didn't ask them how they paid. I thought you just, when you checked in, like you check into a hotel. Yeah. Before you leave. Yeah, you pay. You just put your thousands on your credit card. Yeah. Apparently it's just ticked up.

Ticked up. And that means $20 million is owed. Wow. Which is crazy. That's a lot of money. It's almost the average day, $3,000. Yeah. That is a lot of people are coming into this country, either short term.

You think about, I suppose there's a lot of TV and movie productions going ahead in New Zealand because we are such a great spot to be filming and everything due to the lack of COVID. We're cute. We're COVID free. We've got a few nice vistas around as well for filming. A couple of nice vistas.

Yeah, a couple. So, a couple of them. So I've got the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills. Good. I went online and searched how to get money back from people. Okay. Number six, hold them hostage at Jet Park until they pay. So Jet Park is where you get stuck if you've got the COVID. Yeah.

But also when you need to pay. Yeah. Okay. It sounds like the title of a good horror film, Hostage at Jet Park. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Stuck at Jet Park. Hostage at Jet Park. They are totally renaming that hotel. I wouldn't be surprised if they drove a bulldozer through and started again. Yeah. Number five on the list of the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills.

If they ask any of us to go out for a drink, say we can't afford it at the moment because someone owes us $20 million. Yes. Good idea. That's one of the online tips. How to get money back from a friend if they ask you to do something. Say you can't afford it because you're owed money by someone.

And you can just say it with a slight tone, don't you? Yeah. Oh, look, I really want to, but someone owes me $20 million. And then do that face your mum does when she's giving you a told you so. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, look, I really want to, but someone owes me $20 million. And then do that face your mum does when she's giving you a told you so. Yeah. Yeah. It's like head tilt. Yeah.

Lips up. My head is tilted. My head is tilted. Number four on the list of the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills. Make them work it off doing all the jobs that we don't want to do. Yeah. So you can just go on. I'm imagining there's a website set up.

It's like, this is Kent. Yep. Kent hasn't paid his bills. So he will do any job to pay off his $3,000. Kent's got a background in landscaping. Okay. Vaughan's hedges. Lovely.

And I'm just like, Kent, my hedging is done. Come and do it, bitch. Yeah. It doesn't really solve the debt issue, though, does it? How does it support New Zealand? Well, no, Vaughan's a taxpayer with out-of-control hedges. They get cut. And I pay tax.

Or I pay an absolute minimal fee towards Kent's. Okay, yeah, good. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm like, oh, well, Kent, it's a little bit wobbly. I'll give you $15 towards your MIQ bills. Okay. Yeah. They slowly work it off.

Sort of a pay what they're... Yeah, kind of like community service. Yeah. But less shame. And a little bit of money. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we can chuck them in a pair of bright orange overalls if that makes everybody feel

better. Yeah. It would make me feel better. Like, really make them identifiable. Yeah, totally. Number three on the list of the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills. I think we just start selling their stuff in a garage sale at their house. Yeah, great.

Or repossess it. And their garage. Yeah, sell their garage. Yeah, I'll have their garage. If it's a good garage and easy to move, I'll take it. I'll take the whole house, to be honest. Okay, well, you take it. Kent owes everybody money.

He's got a great hedge, but he doesn't have a house anymore. I'm a taxpayer. That's a weird dream last night About a house moving I went to the pharmacy And they were in the middle of Elevating it Like the piles

And I was like I need to get into the pharmacy What pharmacy was it? A chemist's warehouse? That seems massive They'd need 18 trucks That was bizarre And I was like

Why are you moving the pharmacy During business hours? Well that's good That they stayed open It's a weird dream So you could get your amoxicillin I actually went I actually went into a Brisco's's that was moving during shopping hours,

and they were just shoveling everything into trolleys and moving it out. And I was like, I'm trying to shop here. What's your new Briscoe? Were they moving? Yeah. How far away? You can't push a trolley to a pile without the wheel wobbling. No, I know, but as they were there, they were just sweeping the shelves away.

Weird. Are you sure they just weren't being robbed on Mars? Could be. They weren't wearing Briscoe's uniforms. Yeah, no, they had guns. You just walked into a massive Manchester hold-up. Oh, wow. Number two on the list of the top six ways to get people to pay their MOQ bills.

Chuck an insane interest rate on the money owed. People are always paying their bills when there's a massive interest attached to it, eh? Or not. That's why student loans for people living overseas are going so great. Yeah. That's how the spiral of crippling debt begins. Yeah! I think the threat of crippling debt would be enough to get Kent to cough up for his

MIQ. And number one on the list of the top six ways to get people to pay their MIQ bills, tell them mum and dad they're being naughty. Yeah. Being buggers to pay their MIQ bills, tell them mum and dad. They're being naughty. Yeah. Being buggers. Although I reckon there'd be a few mum and dads just paying. Oh, 100%.

To get their kids back. Oh, I know two people whose parents paid their bills so they could come home and stay for a month. I was like, you're pathetic. Even in a pandemic, you're pathetic. You're just jealous, though, because your mum or dad would never pay. My mum would have left me to rot in London. You wanted to go there.

That is today's top six. All right, coming up on the show, Bakery of the Day. It's a Friday tradition. We need you to nominate your favourite bakery and the thing at the bakery that you love. Also, we have some goods on hand from a previous Bakery of the Day winner that we will be tasting during Bakery of the Day. We've got to fire up,

Jared, fire up the panini press. I want some of this. I've got a lumpy old smoothie that really hasn't gone down well. I've got cramps in my stomach. I don't know what was in there. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Bakery of the day. Well, it's time for a Friday tradition. And things get pretty passionate. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Don't get me started on baked goods. Now, yesterday we went to Bakerman's in Christchurch. I believe our first bakery of the day.

Yes. Yeah, first and winner. Winner, yes. And we got one of the chicken croquettes. Oh, delicious. Had one of those. Yeah, that was the thing that people were raving about. Had one of those.

Carrot cake, great, fantastic. Yeah, they gave us a whole tray of those croquettes. Yeah. Croquettes or croquets? Croquettes. Croquettes, yeah. And there's some hot cross buns in studio from them, and they smell delectable.

Jared has toasted those to near perfection, and I said, is there any butter? And he said, there's no butter. And I said, what? No, you can't have them. You can't eat a hot cross bun without butter. It's going to be drenched in butter. What has Jared done?

Don't put a lot of piano. When I have a hot cross bun, I want it so buttery it's slopping down my arm. Yes. It runs down your forearm. I want a butter puddle on the plate when I'm finished. I want to half drink my hot cross bars. Yes.

All right, well, let's meet bakery number one. Bakery number one. Great mixing. Jasmine, good morning. Morning. Now, you would like to nominate your favourite bakery. Yes, so it's called Village Grinder and they're in Masterton. Oh, the wider upper. Village Grinder and they're in Masterton. Oh, the wider upper.

Village Grinder. Okay. Are they aware that they share their name with one of the world's most popular gay dating apps? Yes. Well, I'm not sure. They may not know. But they use the ER, not just straight R. Grinder, the dating app, drops CE, so it's different.

What would Village Grinder be? Oldie time homosexual hookups. Hello, old boy. Fancy getting rogered by me in this bush? I know. That sort of. I can't believe you're dragging this bakery into your filth, Vaughan Smith. Now, tell us, what's your favourite item at this bakery, at the Grindr bakery?

They do the best caramel slice in coffees. Oh, okay. Do they do a good ginger slice? I don't like ginger slice, to be honest, so I haven't actually tried it. You son of a bitch! Sorry, I can't control myself. I'm very passionate about ginger slice. He does get very passionate.

I'm sorry. He does. Sorry, Jesus. But you need your morning coffee. I need a ginger slice. He does get very... I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But you need your morning coffee. Yeah. I need a ginger slice. And we do indeed. All right.

So the Village Grinder... Yeah. I'm looking at the Village Grinder Facebook page. They've got free quince there at the moment. What do you mean free quince? The fruit that you can make quince paste out of, quince jelly. They've obviously got a fruit that is just absolutely pumping out the quince. Yeah, right.

And also CM Veach left their bank card at the cafe, so you need to pop in and get it. But they do things like the special recently, a bacon and brie tart with garnish, $7 and 10% off if you've got your gold card. That's not bad. I don't have a gold card. $7 is not bad. Not bad.

All right, Jasmine, thank you for your nomination for the grinder. What is it called? The village grinder. The village grinder in Masterton. Bigger ring number two. All right, we'll just pop Jasmine on hold now because we have another nomination. Alex joins us. Good morning, Alex.

Morena. Morena. Now, which bakery would you like to nominate? Old Beach Bakery up on the Carpenter Coast in Wai'anae. like to nominate? Old Beach Bakery up on the Kapiti Coast in Waikanae. Old Beach Bakery. Old Beach Bakery at 3010 Ono Street, Waikanae Beach. That's the one. Okay.

Now, what's your favorite there? What's your favorite bit? Oh, what's not good? Pies have to be number one, followed swiftly by the cheese scones. Oh, followed swiftly by the cheese scones. Oh, followed swiftly. Okay. You can really tell a bakery by its pie. And its scone.

And I tell you what, I'm just on their... The three trees on point. I'm on their Facebook page that introduced a member of the staff, Raj, and he has got a moustache that twirls up at the end. Oh, and he's got my vote. He's got my vote. Do you know Raj?

Are you familiar with Raj? Oh, I might have bummed into him on a Saturday or Sunday or two. He was up near my parents' house. That's a must-have visit every time I go up. Oh, wow. Oh, my God. I'm getting a video. It's a 52-second long video where they, like, scan the cabinet.

Oh. There's a brisket and beer pie. You've got a bacon and egg pie. You've got samosas in there. A classic looking steak and cheese. Now we're into the sweet stuff. A cream patisserie donut. So hungry now.

This always happens. Oh, my Lord. Oh, they do a hot cross bun. Oh, yum. I've got a bit of controversial information here from a Wairarapa local. Okay. Patsy Sproul, my mum, she lives in the Wairarapa, quite close to Kutupuni Village, Grindr.

She visits Grindr a lot, and she's arguing it's a cafe. Yeah, that's what I saw. Oh, is she? I saw that, but they do do a takeaway option from a cabinet. Yeah, but does that make it a bakery? That's just a cafe with a takeaway option, isn't it? Yeah, all cafes do takeaway options, Vaughan. It's not cafe of the day.

It's not. It's bakery of the day. We're very clear on the title. Okay, well, I mean, I did want to vote for that because of the twirled up moustache, but I think I'm going to have to throw my weight, Alex, unfortunately, personally, my vote, behind the grinder because I'm a big fan. No, grinder's the one that's the cafe. Oh, no.

Grinder's the one that's the cafe. So we're back to the moustache. Are we going back to the twirly moustache? We're going back to Raj and his twirly moustache. He's so quick to get behind Grindr. Sourdough, sourdough. You don't need to download it, mate. It's just a bakery. I know you want to show your support.

You're telling me that the donuts are on the app, right? Yes. No, the donuts are not on the app. You can smash so many donuts on that app. Different donut. The donuts just line up and you just hammer through them. So winner of bakery of the day. Today's winner of bakery of the day, I believe the unanimous decision is Old Beach Bakery.

And why can't I? Raj is twirly moustache. I mean, commendation for the cafe. Absolutely. It is a cafe. Absolutely. If you're in the area, getation for the cafe. Absolutely. It is a cafe. Absolutely. If you're in the area, get down to Grindr.

But otherwise, Old Beach Bakery is today's bakery of the day. Congratulations. Woo-hoo! ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. 60% of people are waking up with food hangovers, a study has found. A food hangover is when you wake up with like terrible cramping or the farts or the squirts. The squirts? Do you mean the squirts?

I've always said squirts in my family. We're a squirt family. What? When you refer to diarrhea, you call them the squirts. Yeah, oh man, I've got the squirts. No, it's the squirts. I've had this argument with so many people before. It's the squirts. Yeah, oh man, I've got the squirts. No, it's the squirts. I've had this argument with so many people before. It's the squirts

in the Sprite family. Is that like leading you to think that maybe your family's wrong? We have our own version of right. It's one of those things that your family did one day

and they thought it was funny so now it's just the done thing. You're right. Gotcha. You've got the terrible squirts. Do you guys ever find that like,

is this when you eat no sugar for weeks and you're real healthy and then you have a binge and you eat a lot of chocolate, a lot of sugar or cocktails, you wake up and you've just got a hangover and you're like,

that's what sugar does to you? Well, this survey is actually blaming eating dinner too late because your digestion, it's not its optimum when you're eating dinner at like 9pm, 8pm even too late and then hopping straight into bed, lying on your back that whole time. We're eating dinner too late and we're eating the wrong things.

If you have it too early, then you get hungry right before bed. Yeah, that's terrible, eh? I can't imagine waking up like that and not being like, okay, it's happening again, I better go to the doctor. Like, why are people waking up in pain or... But food, it's hard because also in this study it revealed that about 54% of people claim they have some kind of food intolerance or, you know, their stomach reacts badly to something, be it dairy or gluten or even caffeine or corn syrup.

Yep. But they ignore it. And I'm like this. How many times have I had an apple this week? Every day? I'm allergic to apples. But they're just so delicious. But you just can't stop.

God damn. It's at this stage of the conversation I must thank my father for passing on iron guts. Yeah. He could eat anything. Yeah, they call him Iron Gut iron guts. Oh, yeah. He can eat anything. Yeah, they call him Iron Gut Smithy. Iron Gut Smith. He'll eat it when there's mold growing on it. And I do too.

And maybe that's why. But I never get, like, yeah. I'm the opposite. I can't imagine being allergic to something and still taking it in every day. We have friends who can't eat cheese. Yeah, I can't. I shouldn't eat dairy. And I get it.

My allergies develop. So I'll eat something and then one day I'll just be like, I guess I'm allergic to that now. I guess my body, I'll drink a cup of water and it'll be like, oh, my body's blowing up. You wouldn't have lasted in the old days. Nah. No, I wouldn't.

But maybe everyone says that they think, you know, these food intolerances develop because we avoid them for no reason. So we go, I don't think I should eat dairy. And then we don't eat dairy. And then you eat dairy and your body's like, we're not doing that anymore. You're allergic now. You did this.

That's on you, Hayley. I get a bit farty after an ice cream, but I mean, that's just the price I'm willing to pay. It's a small price. I get farty just looking at an ice cream. Oh I mean, that's just the price I'm willing to pay. It's a small price. I'm just starting, just looking at an ice cream. That's yuck. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

ZM's $50,000 Secret Sound. And it's all thanks to Star Streaming now on Disney+, including more originals like Solar Opposites. You can learn more at DisneyPlus.com. Sharon joins us. Good morning, Shaz.

Morning. Hi. Good morning. Good. Morning. I don't, I mean, yeah, we're at nickname basis. I feel like we might be

about to give her $40,000. I feel we can call her whatever we want. Shazza. Rennie. Ronnie. Are you a Sharon or a Sharon?

Sharon. Ron. It's actually, sorry, I think they got my name wrong. It's actually Sarah. Ronnie. Are you a Sharon or a Sharon? Sharon. Ron. It's actually, sorry, I think they got my name wrong. It's actually Sarah. Oh. Lucky we didn't take that riff, you know, and run with it. Sarah. I know.

I apologize so much. I could have sworn that I was told Sharon, but okay, Sarah it is. Sissy. Sissy. Sarahissy, sissy. Sarah. Don't worry, Executive Intern Anya's hung over with the rest of us. No, she's not. Drag her in. I'm throwing her under the bus.

Also, no one apart from you and Mountie are hung over. I'm throwing her under the bus. All right, Sarah, $40,000 is the current jackpot. This is the secret sound. For $40,000 cash, what is it? Okay, I'm going to guess that it is the sound of pottery smashing. Oh, yeah, like a terracotta pot. Pottery. I like the moment of someone throwing it at the ground and it's the moment of like someone's throwing it at the ground

and it's the moment of Perhaps it's just come out of the kiln and it's just too hot Has someone like thrown it in anger? Or is it just fallen off a plane? It's quite a powerful sound so I'm going to guess yeah Well for $40,000

Yes She wants to spend this money changing her name by deed poll to Sharon. I think so. And who are we to stand in the way of how she wants to spend that money? It suits you, Sarah. It does. Thanks. All right.

I'll let you know now, Sarah. Oh, $40,000. We're at $40,000. $40,000. Good. It's lucky you're in charge of this. I'm very good at this job. Thank you very much.

Soundkeeper Alice was going to take 10 grand just for herself. I noticed. Is that the secret sound? Sarah? It's not. It's not the secret sound. Uh-uh. No pottery smashing for you.

Well, Sarah, $100 cash is all yours. Every wrong guess gets a hundy, and another shot is coming up at 8 o'clock on the show. Next on the show, we want to talk about a budding bromance that we're learning more and more about as it develops, and this budding bromance was born out of someone's girlfriend not wanting to do any activities with them. Ooh.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. We're learning more and more about this. It's been a developing story behind the scenes and we've been nurturing it, haven't we? Yeah, we have been. And we're ready to present it now.

Like a well-thought-out six-part podcast series, except not. Yeah. We've noticed that there's a bromance between Mr. Bun Bun, who is Executive Intern Anya's life partner.

I want to say more than boyfriend but less than fiance. Oh, right. Yeah. People say partner but that just sounds so grown up. What's the longevity of the relationship?

Five years. No, that's your partner. Yeah, that's a partner now. That's your partner, yeah. That's a partner now. I feel like I'm mid-forties onto my second partner. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You were Ms. Anna Henby after you ditched the original married name to go back to your family name. That's how angry and bitter the divorce was. But you, Mr. Bun Bun, and producer Jared are buddy-buddy. This is good. They're friends. You guys live not too far from each other, and it means that all the activities that Mr. Bun Bun wants to do,

you no longer have to be dragged to. It's great. I am vehemently against anything that involves moving. That's fair. Yeah, like your clip and climbs, your jumps, and my boyfriend just froths over

all of them. He loves a trampoline park, doesn't he? He does. And Jared and him have really bonded over it. And it's mutually beneficial. So this is Producer Jared. You will basically palm off activities that your boyfriend wants to do onto Producer Jared. Uh-huh. And I'm not even guilty about it.

I would like to see you take Producer Jared and Mr. Bun Buns to jump, but you sit in one of those little booths that mum's always waiting and they only run back over to you when they need a drink of water and they run over and they're like we need a drink of water how much longer have we got and then they're back into jump for the remaining part of the hour that'd be good what about you producer jared is this good for you? You don't have a brother? No, I've got a sister, but she's not too keen on jumping and flipping climbing. So this is the brother from another mother? Yeah, exactly.

Bun buns and bud buns. Oh, that's cute. That is cute. But we wanted to ask this morning if there are activities that your partner always wants to do, but you never want to. See, I'm dragging Sade into a bit more of these. We're doing a knife-making course next weekend. A knife-making course?

Yeah, cool, right? Cool. And she was like, I don't need a knife. I was like, everyone needs a knife. Why do you need to go to a knife-making course? We were invited to go to a knife-making course. What kind of knife? A kitchen knife or a sort of... That's the thing, Hayley. You decide when you get there.

It could be a small knife. It could be a big knife. A shiv. A prison shiv. Dinner with. It could be. A butter knife. I mean, it'd be weird.

You wouldn't buy just... You just wouldn't make one bread and butter knife. That's weird. Okay. But you can make a sharp knife. Oh, okay. A cleaver. I think might be an option.

Right. I'm just looking forward to seeing Sade hammering red hot steel. Does that do it for you, Vaughn? Make you a bit hot under the collar there. Yeah, I've always dreamed of being married to a blacksmith. Right. Right. You know, like a good wide-shouldered woman.

A metal woman. Yes. So we want to take your calls now. 0800 DALS at M. You can text as well. 9696. Is there an take your calls now. 0800 DALES. You can text as well. 9696. Is there an activity your partner always drags you to and you never want to do it?

Or there's something maybe your partner never wants to do? Maybe you need to find your partner a friend to do this with. Yeah. That would be handy too. Well, Producer Jared's always available. He loves activities. He loves adventure and activities. Loves activities.

On his whole family. So he's happy to take those with the team. All right, 0800DARLS.AM, give us a call. You can text as well, 9696. What are the activities that your partner never wants to do or vice versa? ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. We're talking about when your partner is into something and they're always trying to drag you along to it, but maybe you're not. This is the

situation at hand with executive intern Anya's boyfriend, Mr. Bun Buns. He likes activities. He likes doing clip and climb, for example. That's like ropes. Like a wall climbing. Yeah, rock climbing. I think clip and climb is literally like

the name of a place that does rock climbing. Oh, okay, right. Yeah. And you can climb up like one that looks like a grandfather clock. And at the top, you tap the mouse. Like that sort of nursery rhyme or themed ones. He loves a trampoline park. He loves a trampoline park.

Anya is like, no way. I've got no time for it. It sounds exhausting. Do you know what I mean? It does. When I think about spending a day with my lover, I think about... Wow. I think about a lot of lounging

and a lot of doing absolutely nothing. And wine. I just imagine you two just sit around drinking a lot of wine. Oh, we do. And not like under a tree on a blanket wine. You're just hurting it straight from... You've got a goon each and you're just racing... Yeah, we do a lot of necking.

Racing to the bottom of the goon. So some text messages in on things that your partner's into that they try to drag you along to and maybe you need to find your partner a Jared to take with. LARPing. Someone said, my partner said they were going to get into LARPing as a joke. They were going to

go along to one. This is live action role play. This is the guys that dress up in the park and have sword battles. I feel like LARPing is definitely an individual activity. I don't think it's something you do in a relationship. There's nothing sexy about a bit of LARPing. But you wouldn't want your partner going along and there's a maiden there. Falling in love with a fair maiden. Yes, exactly.

She's a paladin. She's a level 32 paladining in love with a fair maiden. Yes, exactly. She's a paladin. She's a level 32 paladin, which makes her, you know, a force to be reckoned with. I'll have to get my sword and go and fight her. Good luck with that. You're only level 10. Oh, no. And she's got...

Her honour. Yeah, she found that staff with magic powers. Taylor has called up. Taylor, what is... Is it you that's trying to drag your partner along or are you the one that's being asked? No, I get asked every single week to go to do the shopping, supermarket shopping.

We're talking about hobbies. We're not talking about crucial existence. Honestly, no, to him, it's a hobby. He looks at the back of every single package. Oh, no. It's like, no. I want to get in, get out. I know what I'm getting.

I know where I need to be. And I'm out of there. Say no more. Say no more. But then can you trust him to buy everything you need? Not the right stuff, no. No, that's a problem. So that's fine. I just go back myself and then I get my own stuff.

You say he's looking at labels. What's he looking for? Like carbohydrate content? Or is he looking for the best bargain? What's he? Yeah, just whatever. I'm not sure. I don't know.

Oh, God. Multiple criteria for each purchase. He could be disly allergic to something. He could be disly allergic and then you're going, hurry up. And then he eats something with peanuts in it. And he's gone. Then you're regretting it, aren't you? Yeah, actually I never thought about that one. But I'm eats something with peanuts in it. And he's gone. Then you're regretting it, aren't you? Yeah, actually, I never thought about that one.

But I'm pretty sure he's not allergic. He's not, yeah. I'd knock some time off the weekly shop, though, with a new partner. Yeah, that's really good. Hey, thanks you called, Taylor. Some more text messages. Somebody said go-karting. My partner every weekend is like, can we go go-karting?

I'm like, you go go-karting. Oh, he really wants to go go-karting. It sounds like he needs a Jared to go, a new friend to go go-karting? I'm like, you go go-karting. He really wants to go go-karting. It sounds like he needs a Jared to go, a new friend to go go-karting with. I've never had a problem doing these sorts of things by myself. If I really wanted to go go-karting, I'd just go. Same. I prefer life alone.

How is your nine-year relationship going? It's blooming good. We just, yeah. Spend a lot of time apart. Well, she wants to spend the day with her lover, neck and a goon. Somebody said, my partner has tried to drag me along to not only a six-week candle-making course every weekend, to which I said, no, thank you, madame. After that, she got into basket weaving.

Oh, dear. Why are you doing all these? It's not the 1800s. Well, you can go to Canaan and get one for like $3. Yeah, but apparently she likes hobbies. All right, next on the show, it was a light jog around Hagley Park yesterday, Vaughn, for you. Yeah, but I made a mid-purchase run, which I must say I've never done before. Okay.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Megan, the podcast. Yesterday, I went for a run. I don't want to keep going on about it, but I did. You love talking about how a run. I don't want to keep going on about it, but I did. You love talking about how you run. I do exercise. Oh, wow. Oh, wait, I'm ragging on myself now. How did this happen?

You guys turned me on myself. But I love running around Hagley Park. I love Hagley Park. It's beautiful. Hagley Park is, it was fantastic foresight by the forefathers of Christchurch who were just like, yeah, build around it, but leave that park for golfing. Leave a big park. Running and dogs and frisbees.

It's a bit like one in New York, Central Park. Central Park. Central Park, yeah. Is it in your top ten parks? Yep. Have you even thought about your top ten parks? I have not ever thought about my top ten. But it would be in there.

You don't have them written down on a list on your phone? I do. It's on my notes section. I might work on it. What's your number one park? I lied. I don't know. Mads, you came up on this

and we were doing a little bit of improv and you just threw the towel in. This is why you didn't last in our improv group. Yeah. Improv Fridays. Yeah.

I'll make sure you never see the stage of snort ever again. So I was running and my shoes have, because I think I bought these shoes like last year, but just before we were about to go into a lockdown. So they've seen some things. Okay. And at the back, they were,

the foam on the back had all but fallen out. Oh, I hate that. And does that leave the heel, the Achilles heel rubbing on the plastic? Directly on. Then you have a slippy sock. You've got a blister in the making. I've had a run bare feet, to be honest.

That sounds horrendous. Yeah, the blisters are no one's friend. So I was mid-run, and I was like, I could get, I was running past a place where they sell shoes. Okay. I don't want to say where it was.

They offered me absolutely no discount. So I showed up and promoted them as the place to buy shoes. It was primarily their geographic location that helped them yesterday. Okay. As it was where I was running past. Yep. And I went in, sort of like I'd run for a little bit, so I was a little bit sweaty, a little bit puffy,

but not like super sweaty or super puffy. And I bought new shoes mid-run. Wow. Okay. They said, oh, do you need a bag? I was like, no, I bought new shoes mid-run. Wow. Okay. They said, oh, do you need a bag? I was like, no, you can actually even keep the box. Right. And is there somewhere I can chuck these old shoes?

Because, yeah, they kind of blew out and the foam came out of the back. Oh, yeah, right. So I was like, time for some new ones. And they're like, off for a run, are you? I was like, I'm actually in the middle of a run. And that was very confusing to them. How did you have your F-Post? Did you pay on your phone? On my phone, yeah, Apple Pay. Because I had my, and that's like, I'm actually in the middle of a run. And that was very confusing to them. How did you have your F-Post? Did you paywave on your phone?

On my phone, yeah. Apple Pay. Because I had my, and that's like, I put a photo up because later on, on my road, great run. I found a Land Rover, a lovely one that I would love. One of my dream cars, like 2015, one of the last Defenders made in the old shape. And I found it in a car yard and I put a photo up and the amount of people that ragged on me for having an armband for my phone while I'd run.

Oh, armband. An armband. Really? Why is it unacceptable? I can't hold the phone. What? I've got a waist belt. You don't want a bum bag because it's too floppy when you run.

No, no, no, not a bum bag. It's like an armband for the hip region. It's a rant. I saw them in the store where I bought the shoes. Oh, you've got to get one. They're so much more comfortable than something chafing on your arm. Are they? Yeah, they are.

I've just changed your life. Yeah, I think you're about to change the game. I always wonder when people see you coming in to a store all sweaty, if they're like, oh, please don't try on our clothes. I remember I was in Havelocklock North and I ran to Hastings for a little run. And then when you get into Hastings on that run,

the Bendon factory's there and I thought, I'll just have a little laugh. So I went into them. Yeah. I went into Bendon and I thought, you know, while I'm here.

And then, I'm having a bra fitting, a proper bra fitting. Yuck! Oh, sweetie! You're sweaty nuggers! I'm peeling off my wet, sweaty,

yeah, my kahungas are absolutely dripping at this point. Oh, God. And now she's fitting a bra on me. I was like, how did we get here? And I wonder what she must have thought. And then did you buy it?

Or did you say, no, it's all right, put it back on the rack? Oh, I bought some, but yeah, some of them were definitely going on. And then what, you ran home carrying a bend-on bag? Yeah, I did.

Sleep divorces are on the rise, be it young couples or older couples. Sleep divorces, of course, where you're still with your partner, but you sleep in separate beds. And sometimes even separate rooms. Now, one of my grandparents on my father's side, they slept in separate beds when they were older, like much older. Yeah. I only ever remember my dad's parents sleeping in separate beds. They were in the same room.

It was a big room. They were at opposite ends of the room. Really? In single beds or double beds? Single beds. Single. Single beds. Oh no.

At least get a bigger bed. Well this is saying there's sort of two sides to it. You've got to, like one, is it good for the relationship? Yes or no.

It's basically, is it good for your relationship? Yes or no. And the way to decide that is with most things in your relationship, you've got to talk about it and what it's going to bring.

Is it going to strengthen your relationship you've got to talk about it and what it's going to bring is it going to strengthen your relationship if you have better sleep apparently 36% of people have difficulty sleeping with their partners well that's

if your partner's a snorer or is always tossing and turning and keeps you awake you're going to be grumpy right because you're not getting good sleep and you're going to grow you're going to grow resentment towards them.

So if you can sleep in separate beds or separate rooms and you're still together, then maybe that works for people. But I know, but there's two sides to it. You know, where's your, then you've got to sort of. Where's the spurning? Where's your intimacy? Yeah. Where's your cuddles?

That connects people, doesn't it? Maybe you get that on the couch, you know, before bed. You're watching Netflix. Right. And it's the cuddle couch time. Wow. Well, this one couple. Yeah, cuddling on a couch is no one's friend, though.

It's a thin area. There's cushions. Where do you put your arm? I mean, it's all right if it's, you know, if almost immediately leads to further action, perhaps. Oh, right. But, yeah, would you have a cuddle bed? Like, if your kids have their time and you've got the room,

maybe you've got a room for cuddling, and it's a larger bed, and then you've got a room for sleeping. Or could you have a large bedroom and you just put two double beds together, or two queen beds, and then you start cuddling on someone's bed. And then someone rolls over.

And then just before you're about to go to sleep, you just kind of get onto your bed. And then everyone's got their separate bed. Yeah, well, someone here has said, you know, there's a stigma to sleeping in separate beds. It sort of suggests that maybe you're not happy together, but actually being tired and resentful of your partner can't be good for your relationship.

One of them has sleep apnea. They're hooked to a machine. They've got restless leg syndrome. They thrash, moan and steal blankets. And their spouse, on the other hand, is a very light sleeper, struggles with insomnia. It's a lethal combination because we don't really think about this, do we, when we start dating someone.

You don't pick someone based on their sleep style. Yeah, but maybe that's a question we should be asking. You move into a new flat or a house and should be asking. Yeah, we should be asking ourselves long term. You move into a new flat or a house and you test the shower pressure, don't you? It's the first thing you do. Maybe the first question is, you know, not what's your favourite hobbies and stuff.

So you're saying you should sleep together on the first date. That's your advice? I mean, maybe, yes. Early on. But then they have to stay over. Is that what you're saying? Oh, I mean, that's up to Early on. But then they have to stay over. Is that what you're saying? Oh, I mean, that's up to the person, isn't it?

Them staying over, that breaks two of Fletcher's top five rules of relationships. Staying over. Yeah, staying over is one of them. The other ones. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, we're in Christchurch, in our Christchurch studios today. Last night, bangers bingo. Fantastic night.

Thank you to everybody that came along. Yeah, Wall Street, what a wonderful spot. Everyone had a great time. I've had lots of good nights out in Christchurch. Yeah. I don't know how to put it on. Have you been to the Pink Lady rooftop bar? Oh, I haven't.

We went there. Oh, lovely. We were hosted. Same people own it. So they said, come and check out the rooftop bar oh i haven't we went there oh lovely we were hosted same people own it so they said come and check out the rooftop bar and delightful there was a cocktail with candy floss oh you dropped the candy floss into the cocktail and it melted it triggered me because as a child i went to the amp show and with a bag of candy floss and it rained and it melted all my candy floss and i was so i cried you were set a bag of wet sugar. Yeah.

Coloured wet sugar. Pink wet sugar. You were like that raccoon in that video that tries to wash his candy floss and it disappears. He's so confused. Basically, I was. So, fantastic night.

Thank you to Wall Street for hosting us. We'll be at Stumpers tonight in Hokitika for the Bangers Bingo and then the Wild Foods. Like a lot of people from Krasic in the South Island

making their pilgrimage over Arthur's Pass this weekend. Are you going to be brave and try some really wild stuff, Fletch? I'm maybe a sautéed chicken kebab. Oh my God. I hope it's not too spicy. Chickens, they're an out there creature,

aren't they? Now let me take you back to last night's group chat. Please do, because I'm really confused. Yes. Carl, what is our meeting time in the foyer? 4.50? Question mark. Are we also checking out or are we coming back?

Now, this is pretty standard admin chat. Yes. 4.50 a.m., please, everybody. For the record, I then pushed for a 5 a.m. departure. You did. And then no Vaughan, 4am. But what time do we leave? Three minutes past five.

Yep. Because they can't leave without me. I also love that, Fletch, you said in that message, 4.50, Vaughan, don't be naughty. Yep. He was naughty. And then we talked about the almonds and how I was still eating some almonds that I took from the bar because they were delicious almonds. I simply must get that recipe.

And that's when Jared has said, I have a tummy full, right? Of almonds. Of almonds, yeah. We were all eating almonds. Then underneath that, Hayley, you'll notice it says, Jared unsent a message. Because after the almond chat, most people went to bed. I was in bed. I was asleep.

Full of almonds. I saw a message pop up, up like minutes later from producer Jared. I was like, oh, he must be talking about the almonds again. No, I had just finished a FaceTime with the midi. Yes. Okay, so. What did that? Yeah, okay.

Bit of FaceTime action. Bit of FaceTime. Away from home. Bit of stuff. Rightio. Hello. It wasn't just the face, was it? It wasn't getting much time at all, if you know what I'm saying.

Yes. I was very distracted. Yeah. Yeah. And that is when producer Jared sent to the group chat, Babe, I love you so much. Oh, no. Babe. Babe. I love you so much. Oh, no. Babe, I love you so much.

Babe. To which I replied, Jared, was that meant for the group chat? Question mark. And Jared went, oh, F my life. In capital letters. And he knew what was coming because I'd screenshot that. Yeah. And he said, no, babe.

I love you so much. I wouldn't even be too phased about this if it wasn't for the babe. Yeah. Babe. To put it into perspective, this is the chat I had with Sade last night. Home now, jumping into bed. She said, love you.

I said, I saw Jason Gunn tonight. Yes! ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM's $50,000 secret sound. It's ZM's $50,000

secret sound. It's all thanks to Star Streaming, now on Disney+, including more originals like Solar Opposites. You can learn more at DisneyPlus.com. Currently the jackpot, $40,000 cash. Not to be sneezed at, is it?

$40,000? Well, with a mask on, certainly not. Udayan, I hope you're not sneezing at $40,000. Udayan, are you there? Oh, no. Where's he gone? There he is. Hello. Udayan, are you there? Oh, no. Where's he gone? There he is. Hello.

Hello. Oh, gosh. Have we lost Udayan? Are you there? Have we lost Udayan? Good. We've got you. Would you like to speak?

Oh, okay. Oh, sorry. Okay, we've lost Udayan. Udayan, I don't know how long you were waiting, but you're gone. Michelle will come to you. Oh. Oh. okay. Sorry, okay, we've lost you, Diane. I don't know how long you were waiting, but you're gone. Michelle will come to you. Oh, Michelle. You're Diane. First backup caller.

Backup caller, Michelle, you made it. How are you? I'm so good, thanks. So good. You're like, I'm glad. Yeah, you're like, I'm glad his phone cut out. I'm got this. All right.

So now let's have a listen to the secret sound. Now, yesterday, Clint and Maddie took the TikTok. There was a TikTok, the clue. And they isolated that sound that was in that TikTok video. Okay. Right. So that was the sound from the TikTok video. And this is the secret sound.

Yeah. Wow. So many sounds. So many. Michelle. Anyway, what is the secret sound, Michelle? Yeah. So I think the secret sound is a film camera taking a photo. Do you reckon like a proper photography one or like a disposable?

Like a proper photography one. Like a 35, do they call it 35 mil? Yeah, I have one. Yep, 40 bucks on Trade Me. A film camera, vintage. I have one. Yep, 40 bucks on Trade Me. A film camera, vintage. 40 bucks on Trade Me, God. Good, eh? No, not good.

I think you've been solidly ripped off. Nah, and then $35 to, I don't know, get one developed. Hey, you're talking to kids, you're talking to people who grew up in the 90s, were very familiar with taking a photo and then waiting a week to find out it was a waste of money. You had your finger over the lens. Yeah, the flash didn't go off. All right, well, for $40,000.

Is it the secret sound? Michelle, I can tell you right now that that's not the secret sound. I bet you Dane had it right. Yeah. I'd almost put money on it. $40,000. You're Dane, you missed out. Yeah, well, because he drove through a tunnel.

Hey, we've got $100, though, for you for an incorrect guess. We'll have another chance coming up at 11. Chances throughout the day at 1, 4, and 5. Friday Flashback. 11. Chances throughout the day at 1, 4 and 5. Well, it's my pick for Friday Flashback this week and before the show, I was just looking through, I googled the top songs of 10 years ago and this song was the first one I clicked

on. I played it and everybody in the room was like... Like that. It wasn't like an exclamation of joy. It wasn't like an exclamation of joy. It was just, it reminded me that the song existed. Yeah, I'd forgotten about it. I'd forgotten about it as well. It's 10 years old exactly.

It was released exactly a year ago. It's the band's biggest song. Their only really biggest song. So you'd say it's a one-hit wonder. In New Zealand, it peaked at number 16 on the charts. It made it to seven in Australia. And in the US, it wasaked at number 16 on the charts. It made it to 7 in Australia. And in the US, it was 7 in the Hot 100 Billboard charts, so huge

there. Wow. Yeah, finished up in Australia, it was the 44th biggest song of the year. Far out. So we played it in New Zealand a lot at the time, 10 years ago. Yeah. This was kind of the music, like pop rock 10 years ago, big, huge. Yes. Bands like this.

And Gym Class Heroes. Metro Station. Metro Station. Trace Cyrus was covered in tattoos. And so I've decided to go for this for Flashback Friday. And there's still a band, believe it or not. I googled, I clicked on their website and it's updated and new. And they've got

a concert scheduled for like Arizona this weekend? How big's the venue that they're going to play in? Probably not too big. Probably not too big, no. Carwen, who's working behind the scenes, she's just messaged me saying she's a huge fan and the drummer from this band got married today to a fan.

Oh, really? But they met because they were a big fan. Obviously, Carwen missed out there because she's a big fan. She could havewen missed out there because she's a big fan. She could have married the drummer. Yeah. Well, the band today and your Friday flashback is Hot Shell Ray. And tonight, tonight, on ZM.

Seven days of torture, seven days of bitter. And my girlfriend went and cheated on me. She's a California dime, but it's time for me to quit her. La, la, la, whatever. La, la, la, it doesn't matter. La, la, la, oh well. La, la, la, we're going at it tonight. Tonight, there's a party on the rooftop top of the world.

Tonight, tonight, and we're dancing on the edge of the Hollywood sign. I don't know if I'll make it, but watch how good I'll fake it. It's alright, alright, tonight, tonight. I woke up with a strange tattoo. It's your Friday flashback. Hot Shell Ray, Tonight Tonight. Have literally not heard that song for probably 10 years. Yeah, and I'm also not mad about it. No. I'm not mad about listening to it again.

It's a banger. Oh, I thought you were saying you were not mad about not hearing it for 10 years. Some text feedback on Fletcher's Flashback Friday. Someone said, yes, Fletch, what a banger. I haven't heard the song in forever, but I still remember all the words. And then somebody gets quite philosophical on it. Will they take a bit more time with their review? Not a bad song.

It's a good Kickstarter, and it has a touch of nostalgia in there as well. Somebody else said, I feel like this used to hit harder. It used to hit them a bit harder. I think you were just getting older. I feel like giving it a bit of breathing room, giving it 10 years has sort of aged it well. Yes.

Sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder. That's very true. Someone said, I'm? Like sometimes absence makes the heart grow fonder. That's very true. Someone said I'm neither stoked nor gutted. Seven out of ten. I'll take that. That's a pass. That's a pass. That's 70% dog.

That's great. That's like a B. Is that a B or a C? Right. Broadcasting out of our Christchurch studio today, we're off to the Wild Foods Festival this weekend. We've got a bangers bingo tonight in Hokitika and we've got a bit of a travelling party with us.

Sarah is here. We'll introduce you to Sarah. Good morning. Hi, Sarah. Hello. I'm serious. Do I sound as bad as I feel, Hayley? Oh, my gosh.

What happened? Well Street Pub took care of us. These young whippersnappers, they can't keep up. We're seasoned professionals with our leathery livers. That is not true. Right. But that professionals with our leathery livers. That is not true. Right. But that's not what we wanted to talk about.

You've got something on your nose. Yes. I noticed this yesterday and I didn't say anything. Yeah, I noticed. Because I don't, I never assume

to know other people's skin stuff. Other people's anything stuff. You don't want to call out someone that could have a rash or something. They could have eczema. They could have an allergy that causes that. They people's anything stuff. You don't want to call out someone that could have a rash or something. They could have eczema. They could have an allergy

that causes that. They could have ringworm. You don't know. Keep away from me. I don't. I don't want the ringworm but I won't say that. I saw you at the airport

and I was like, oh, should I say something? But I didn't. Oh no. It's kind of like, it's almost like you'd scuffed it and it was flaky.

Or you'd received a very specific area got sunburned yes and it had peeled yeah or Hayley

you wait till you hear how this scuffing came about oh goodness Sarah Corsi please admit to thank you for the last name

please admit to people who are currently looking you up on Instagram oh dear what caused the scuffing on the end of the nose? Well, I told this very privately to producer Anna, but here we are.

It's from a boy. His moustache. What? You've got pash rash on your nose. The tits of your nose. Which I've actually never had before, and now I've realised how noticeable it is. And I said, Hayley, because you're going to grow over from Nova,

sports facial hair all the time, doesn't he? He's got a big beard, my man. Yeah, you're part of Aaron, loves a beard. Big suits a beard. Yeah, and that doesn't give you any kind of rash or friction. No, but I feel like the longer, because his beard's quite long, and I feel like long beards don't give you pash rash as deeply as like a short, sharper beard.

A stubble. You did show me a photo of the moustache in question, Sarah. I won't mention any names here, but it did look like a bristly short moustache. Yeah, can you please put it on the group chat? I need to see it. Yeah. I'll definitely put it on the group chat. Handsome lad, the moustache hasn't come in properly.

He looks like a 16-year-old. Oh, that's not true. It hasn't. It hasn't. It hasn't. It's, like, fluffy, and he, I mean, it's, you you know the 16 year olds When they don't want to shave it Because they're like

I've got a mustache But you're like Come on bro Just keep shaving it Until you're in your mid 20s No but it still had enough It wasn't fluffy It still had enough to cause

I thought it was pretty good I think it's a great mustache I mean you're I'd say it's like You're macking out on it all night Yeah Maybe it's like Nylon burn Have you ever been fishing And had nylon go on it all night. Yeah. Maybe it's like nylon burn.

Have you ever been fishing and had nylon go through your fingers and it burns? Maybe because his moustache is like nylon, it could be creating a nylon burn. Pardon me? Does he need a bit of your oil? Yeah, I was just about to ask. I can recommend some oils. Some facial hair oils. Yeah, facial hair oils.

Maybe some moustache wax. So we wanted to ask on the back of Sarah's big nose rash. But, but, but, but. I said, how is your nose even touching his moustache? I'm familiar with kissing. I've done it five plus times. Yep. The nose goes to the side of the nose.

Yeah. How are you kissing him? No, I'm just. It does go in a little bit. I'm just trying to replicate it with my hand. You go one way, they go the other. My wife's never had any pash-related rash.

Maybe you're not pashing her hard enough. Should I be pashing her harder? It doesn't go on the nose though, does it? No, the nose never touches the facial hair. I think the nose is brushing along here. The upper lip. You're kissing wrong. Why are you kissing

his chest why are you kissing you're back and over his bottom lip and you're just smushing your nose it was weird terrible technique

yeah thank you alright well that technique aside we want to ask this morning do you have a clang teeth

pardon do you have a clang teeth with him no well that's all we want to know if you've ever had a kissing injury

like have you ever because the teeth oh yeah Oh, yuck. Well, that's all we want to know. If you've ever had a kissing injury. Mm. Like, have you ever, because the teeth. Oh, yeah. Gnashing, you get a bit passionate. Yeah, oh, yeah. Gnashing? Or the inside, when you've really gone at it.

After an afterball, for example. Speaking from my experience. If you're really going at it while everyone's watching Forrest Gump on the couch. At your friend Cara's house. If you're really going at it, not with Cara, different person. But you're really going at it while everyone's watching Forrest Gump on the couch at your friend Cara's house, if you're really going at it, not with Cara, different person, but you're really going at it and the next morning the inside of your lip is just an absolute mess. Yuck. It's very specific, that story,

Bourne. Very specific. So, 0800 DARS at M. We want to take your calls now. You can text in as well, 9696. What's your kissing injury? Have you ever had a kissing injury? Please share. Maybe make Sarah feel a bit better about her nose rash. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

Sagala, James Arthur, Lasting Lover on ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul. What is going on down in Christchurch? We're just discussing some of these text machines. Guys, five seconds. Five seconds. Four seconds. Well, Sarah's telling us more details.

This is Sarah who works with us. Her nose has a rash from kissing. From nuzzling into that tasty mousse. Yeah. It's fine today.

Yeah, but yesterday it looked like you'd been sunburned and the skin had peeled off. That's how bad and how many days prior to today was the passion?

What day of the week did that take place? What day are we on today? Friday. Yesterday was Wednesday. Thursday, yes, that's how it works. Oh, Wednesday. So the passion was Wednesday, the irritation was Thursday. It's all cleared up by Friday.

Gotcha. I'm just creating a calendar of events. So we want to know from you, your kissing accidents. Yes, and how bad was it? No shortage of texts. Oh, yes. And some of them, I must put a warning. There's one in particular.

Before I read it, I will give a warning. Do you want that at the end? At the end, yeah. Be aware. Be aware. It's lurking. People are very confused about the end of the nose rash. They're not sure how it happened.

Many people have had pash rash. Yeah, but not on the nose. Not on the end of the nose. You They're not sure how it happened. Many people have had past rash. Yeah. But not on the nose. Not on the end of the nose. You're pissing wrong. Yeah, did he have like a large gap between the bottom of his nose

to his lip where your whole nose could fit? Probably. I'd say his face is definitely probably a bit more spread out than mine. Too wide.

I mean, it's bigger. What is there to say about someone? You've got a very spread out face, don't you? Spread out face. Let's take some calls. Jack has called.

Jack, you've had a kissing injury before. Morning, team. Yeah. Morning, mate. Okay. How bad was it? Was it a rash on the end of your nose? Oh, probably a bit worse, to be honest.

A few years ago. Okay. I was at the school dance, as you were, doing the deed in the corner. Yeah. Okay. And got a bit of tongue action in there, and my tongue came in contact with her tongue piercing. Oh!

Yeah. And then, yeah, it was piss and blood for a minute. And then didn't know how to justify that one, kept that one pretty dark for the boys. Yeah. How did it? Was it sharp? Was it a sharp tongue piercing?

But it would have been because they were bald on each side, weren't they? Because you wouldn't want the sharp thing. Or did you kiss her so hard you undid the screw on ball at the bottom? You undid the ball. I'm going to be honest. I don't know much about tongue piercings. When I was 17 years old, my boyfriend had a tongue piercing and I had a lip piercing.

And every now and then it would tap. Like the metal would tap. They never hooked, but you'd hear a little rattle as we kissed like hungry teenagers. Jack, thanks for your call. Henry's called up. Henry, you also have had a... I like that the guys are the ones admitting this. You've had a kissing injury before?

Yeah, more than a guy. So I was on the receiving end of the blood in the mouth with a girlfriend at the time, quite a few years ago. And we were making out. It was all getting hot and heavy, and she was sucking on my tongue, and it ended up

going, go on, sorry, I got to nail myself. It ended up, like, snapping that little bit of skin between the bottom of your tongue and the floor of your mouth. Oh, Henry. Yeah, you just imagine, like, blood everywhere,

and it was, like, good sort of two or three weeks before I was able to sort of start French again. Oh, my God. You could have just choked on it. You could have slipped right off your mouth and down your throat. What happened? Because is that what stops it from going backwards? No, not quite.

You're thinking it quite a lot more than what it was. It snapped it, but it wasn't like full tongue, just full mouth. Why is she nibbling at your tongue string? How hard was she sucking? Well, quite hard, apparently. Yeah. Did you have one of those? Did you have like a little, is it called tongue tied?

Sometimes they laser them in babies because they can't get their tongue far enough out. Were you always a short-tongued man prior to this? No, I assumed my tongue was fairly normal length. Had really got the measuring tape out and measured, but you know. Okay. All right, Henry, thanks. You got some text messages. So many.

Is this making you feel better, Sarah? Yeah, those are disgusting. Well, there's still no one with an end of nose injury. No, no end of nose injuries. That's yours and yours alone at this stage, Sarah. My missus and I were having a pash. Oh, okay. And I bit her lip in a sexy fashion.

It turns out there was a pus-filled thing in her lip which burst. Oh, yes! You said you were going to warn us. That's not the one I needed to warn you about. That's not the one with the... That's not the one. That's not the one I needed to warn you about. That's not the one? That's not the one. That's gross. That should have also had a warning.

I had my pash rash first time in Australia as a 19-year-old. I ended up with one on my chin about 10 centimetres long by 5 centimetres long. That's big. Had visited the zoo that day. I was holding a koala and I thought for years it was a koala until it happened five years later. Then I realised it was pashala until it happened five years later then I realised it was pash rash. Oh my god.

More people very confused about the top of the nose or the underneath of the nose. Maybe we need to get a picture, a diagram up

of what it looked like at the time. If we could get some kind of diagram going that would really help me. Another afterball incident. A young lady maybe thought she was being

feisty or seductive biting my bottom lip. That would be maybe thought she was being feisty or seductive, biting my bottom lip. That would be great, but she was doing it every five seconds, and I just ended up being like, I can taste metallic. Oh, no. She'd bitten through my lip. Oh, dear. And I was bleeding.

When I was younger, I was hanging out with a girl named Hannah. I was a bit frigid and nervous. I went to kiss her. I came in way too hot. I smashed my front tooth into hers, chipped both of our teeth, and split her lip. Slow down, mate. So that was a trip to the dentist? Yeah.

Okay, so this is the one that needed the warning. Oh, no. This is, yeah. We can punch out straight after this. Okay. Someone said, not necessarily an injury, but I did end up being quite sick. I was making out with a guy, and I could feel something moving around his mouth. I was like, what's moving around his mouth?

And then it went into my mouth. Everyone in there is okay. So it went into my mouth. I was like, I recognize that taste. What's that? Oh, my God. It's a booger. A booger had gone

from his mouth into hers and she said it was like a dry booger and then she was like, she spewed it into his mouth with the spoon. You're naughty. That is so wild.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. It's time for... Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day. Today's Fact of the Day, I'm a huge fan of fabric softener. If I ever do the weekly shop, I always grab a fabric softener. Why a huge fan of fabric softener If I ever do the weekly shop I always grab a fabric softener Why? Because I love fabric softener

Oh okay And we're probably going to be out of fabric softener Because someone uses too much fabric softener It's me Why? I never use it It's a waste of money Yeah same

I don't use it I like my towels crisp Yeah You exfoliate with the dry towel After the shower Yes You know that Remember when body brushing came in, they were like, it removes your cellulite,

you just get to get a dry brush. I was like, don't need that. I've got crispy towels. What? No, tell me more about body brushing. I've never heard of it. Dry brushing, it's like you get a kind of a big bristly brush and you like scrub your skin and cellulite gone.

It doesn't. Does it actually work? No, it doesn't work. No, of course not. Okay, well, today's fact of the day, because I've never really questioned how they worked. Fabric softener. Fabric softeners work by electrically charging the fibres of a fabric

to give them a softer feeling. How is it electric? When it's liquid. It poofs them out. In the water, it poofs it out. Yeah, there's something in there that when it goes in the hot wash and the spin and then afterwards when you dry it,

it's like a static charge. It kind of gives it, like you know how your hair stands up on end if you touch one of those Tesla coils? Yep. No, an electric fence just makes you go Right. But those Tesla coils, are they those things that make your hair go up? Little tingle.

And then it looks softer and everything. Yeah. So it stays in the fabric, and then when it dries, it just floofs it a little bit. Oh, okay. Holds a bit of the static charge and makes it softer. What if you do a cold wash? Because I always do a cold wash. So apparently the real power of it comes in the drying.

Oh, okay. The drying part of it. So if you dry it on the line, in the heat, or if you really want your fabric softener to kick in, it's a tumble dry. Oh, but that's fabric suicide. It's fabric suicide. I don't use the dryer very much,

maybe on a pair of old undies. What about the towels? What about a towel you might fluff a towel with some sheets? If I had to, if I have to, I love drying by air. Yeah. I'm an eco-warrior. Old-fashioned.

Yeah, get them out on the rotary clothesline. I'll tell you what, if that stain didn't get completely taken out of that, the sun will do the work. Yeah, it will. The sun will do the rest of the work. So today's fact of the day is fabric softeners work by electrically charging the fibres of the fabric. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Now, my relationship, my, what is it called?

Reputation. Reputation, not my relationship. Your relationship is on the line. On the rocks. No, my reputation in Christchurch is under attack. Okay, I received a message from Amelia on Instagram. Amelia, hate her already. Amelia.

No, she's just pointing this out. She's the one that's worried. I'm going to have to jump to your defence, Vaughn. Thank you. I appreciate that. Just blindly swinging. You didn't even know what you were defending. No.

Yeah, that's good of you. Vaughn, you burnt my house down. Well, you got a good point. I did. And Hayley's like, how dare you? It reads, hey, Vaughn, were you also, this is because I said I was going for a trot. Yeah.

And I found a car that I liked. Were you also in a car today driving around Hagley Park? And did you aggressively toot at someone trying to get into your lane? Now this, so far, sounds right up my alley, doesn't it? It sounds like something you would do.

I drive with the whitest of arrogance. I think the world belongs to me when I'm out there driving. I want to stop sometimes. That's why you moved the road cones at Auckland Airport so you could take that park that wasn't meant to be parked in. Oh, I do that. That's my white thing as well.

What's this road cone? I'm just going to move that. I don't think this applies to me. And because they said, did you aggressively turn at someone trying to get into the lane? Because that was me. I was trying to squeeze into the lane and there was plenty of room, but the car behind me sped up and didn't let me in. I managed to squeeze in

and the car turned at me. I looked in my rearview mirror and pulled the fingers. So she's the instigator of the aggression. And then he pulled the fingers back at me. When I caught eye contact with the bastard, I thought that is a Vaughn Smith if I've ever seen him. And now I see that you're here in Christchurch. I wonder, was it you? And if so, and then she pulled the fingers emoji again. Brilliant. And I said, ha, ha, I wonder, was it you? And if so, and then she pulled the fingers emoji again. Brilliant.

And I said, ha, ha, ha, nah, it wasn't. But what kind of car was it as we were driving the hits car? Another radio station in this company's portfolio. Stable radio stations. And she said, negative. It was actually a bit of a Bundy Silver Nissan Tida. Tilda. Tida.

It's not a Tilda? No, it's two I's, but they're both capital I's. No, it always looks like an L. No, but why would they put the L in lowercase and then everything else in uppercase? It's an uppercase. Is it? Yeah.

It's always at a distance. I never look closely. I-I-D-A. Okay. Teeter. Yeah, right. Tider. Teeter.

It's no L. Yeah, that confuses me too. Okay. And IA. Yeah, right. T-I-D-A. T-A. It's no L. Yeah, that confuses me too. Okay. And I said, well, I won't have it. And then somebody else messaged me saying, you need to calm down in your silver T-A. Are you serious? I would just like, I'm presuming he's hatted, be it beanie or cap. Yep.

And I'm imagining he's bearded. Or he's bald. He might be bald. He might be rocking around, say, with a thick layer of sunscreen on his head, I hope, because that's the thing about being bald. If you're not going to wear a hat, you're going to get sunburned very easy. It's thin skin. Yeah, and he's obviously rocking a beard as well.

Yes. But the problem is, even if somebody doesn't look remotely like you, but has a beard and a bald head, people immediately assume it's you. It's me, yeah. Because you get this a lot, don't you? Oh, it's baldness, beardism at its absolute finest. People just assume we're one and the same. They don't all look the same.

No. Replaceable. Don't please don't call us them. You people. We're a people too. I know, yeah. So I don't know who this bearded larrikin in the teeter is. I need to see a photo of him now to see how much he looks like you.

You're saying. Yeah, I know. For two reasons. To satisfy my curiosity, but also if we ever need somebody to reconstruct you in Police 10-7. Yes. Yeah, that's very important. That would be very important. Although we'd probably use Ben Barrington from Shortland Street.

He's got the acting chops. He's got the acting chops to carry it. But we don't want him to overact Police 10-7 reenactment. A reenactment. Yeah, we want a really natural. Subtlety acting chops to carry it. And I want him to overact a Police 107 reenactment. A reenactment. Yeah, we want a really natural. Subtlety acting. Yeah. Yeah.

Every day kind of actor. Hayley, would you shave your head and have a beard glued on to play me in a Police 107 reenactment? Yeah, I would do that. You'd have to pay for it, but I did go to drama school, something I like to bring up quite often. Yeah. And I'm a transformative actress. Yeah. Well, that's the third time today you've mentioned

you went to drama school and you probably don't even realise you're doing it. But, okay, great. So that's a couple of people to play. So I don't know who this guy is, but just chill out, buddy.

Chill out, pal. Do we get a colour for the Nissan Tita? Chill out, chum. Silver. Silver Nissan Tita. They're all silver, though. Christ, it's a popular colour.

It's a very popular colour for the ugly little car that is the Nissan Tita. If you spot this man, please send a photo. Or if you know this man, please send us a photo. We need to see the likeness. Just ask him to chill out. And just be aware that he may be aggressive, so please don't approach him.

Me or the guy? Both. Please don't approach me either. You don't like people? No, I'm quite shy. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Fletch Warner Megan with Hayley Spr podcast. Fletch Warner-Megan with Hayley Sproul, who's actually an improv champion.

I'm getting absolutely roasted off air about my improv skills. Improv, eh? What a world, right? So, guys, I've got a story from Brisbane, and it's, I guess, a warning to people that make cakes, and I guess if you like cakes. I love cakes. Watch out.

So it's just a warning to the masses. This is, so this is a scam. And like, this story is very funny, but also like, I feel so bad for the cake person, the cake shop that was scammed here. So somebody ordered a cake. And do you know at the moment, we've actually been sent a few of these cakes.

The rage is you have kind of like a tallish cake. Yeah. And when you cut into it, lollies are like your favourite sweets. Yes. Yes. Like M&M's or... Yeah. And so you get this like, you know, you get a good bit of cake, but then you also get

the yummy lollies in the middle. Mint leaves. Ew. Oh, what? Get out. Guys, get out. Oh, no, I was just kidding. So anyway, this person brings the cake maker in Brisbane,

and they're like, I want one of those cakes for my friend, but in the middle, I want to give them a lot of cash so that when they open it, like coins and money pour out, which is disgusting. Yuck, because money's gross. What if they beam those coins? So I don't know if they put the money in plastic, but then that's not appealing when you cut open a cake

and it's in like a glad bag. There's like a glad bag in there, yeah, full of cash. Or whether or not they disinfected like heaps and heaps of coins, but hundreds of, they said, look, put heaps of money in there because, you know, this is my friend. This is a cake to say thank you. Yeah, I love that. And the cake makers are, of course, fantastic.

When the person went in to pick it up, they showed them the bank's transfer and they took the cake. The bank transfer was photoshopped or fake and they'd basically taken off with this cake, stuffed with money and didn't pay a cent for the cake. That is clever. I know. Like, you've got to. But also, like, you should.

It's so bad. Why weren't they paying by F-Pass or credit or cash? Yeah, I don't know. I's so bad. Why weren't they paying, like, F-Pass or credit or cash? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I wouldn't accept. In that situation, I wouldn't accept a bank transfer. Not if I'd loaded a cake with a couple of hundred dollars. Yeah.

Yeah. And also, it seems like an insane amount of effort to go to to get a couple of hundred dollars. Like, do they say how much money was in the cake? It seems a crazy amount of effort to. No, just a couple of hundred. Which you could totally be caught for. Because I'm assuming, did they phone order it? So they'll have their number or an email or...

But they just showed a screenshot of the bank transfer, which is obviously fake, and then took that away. So they've got really no leads apart from what the person looked like. And maybe a phone call from a burner. Like, I totally agree, Vaughn. Like, it's so well thought out for just a couple of hundy. Yeah, Ocean's Eleven. George Clooney and Brad Pitt didn't plan a casino,

that insane casino heist for a couple of hundred bucks. No. Or even a couple of thousand. Weren't they getting away with millions? And they were really sticking it to that boss they didn't like. You're thinking there's a lot of effort. There is a lot of effort for the cake maker but not for the person with the scam. They're literally

ringing up, ordering it, picking it up. No, I mean more the thought though. The thought process. Yeah, true. I need to buy some new shoes. How am I going to get that money? What if we get a cake? Yeah. We'll say it's for Barry.

I don't know a Barry Yeah There you go If you're a cake maker Watch out Watch out for this cake scam Make them pay with cash Or a hit

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