ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 16th MARCH 2021

Episode Date: March 15, 2021

D Grade Restaurants  Top 6: Bottomless Brunch  Producer Jared got a Slow Cooker!  Vaughans Grooming  When did a booty call go wrong?  Bet I Can Guess Your Mums Name!  Producer Jared's lunch mistakeFact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul podcast, Thanks to McCafe by 5 McCafe Coffees, and get one free on the Maccas app. Unfortunately, Hayley not here today, and we start the show with terrible news out of the Vatican. Oh, more of a Vatican. It is, you're right, the Vatican today, because they have said that they can't bless gay unions because you can't bless sin. I'm just paraphrasing there from these seven pages in multiple languages, the issue out of the Vatican today.

What did they say? They can't bless the unions, but they can't welcome the unions, but they can welcome the gay people. Yeah, so go along to the church, donate some money. Yeah, but they're basically saying we're all some money. Yeah, but they're basically saying, we're all sinners. You sin, but you're welcome here. That's not an inviting way to be invited somewhere. No, it's not. You don't have a dinner party for assholes and then say, come one, come all, invite your friends.

And they say, but the title is dinner party for assholes. And you're like, yeah, yeah, you're an arsehole, but you're invited. And they're not allowed to eat the food. They're not allowed to put it. But the rest of them can eat. Yeah, everyone's allowed to put it. Very. But then everybody's an arsehole.

Do you know what I'm saying? Everyone can get married. Yeah, just save your time. Don't get married. Don't go to church. Yeah, yeah, save your money. So that's, if anyone's keeping count of the Catholic Church, paedophiles, yes.

Yep. Gay marriage, no. No, yeah, right yeah right okay so that's a weird one that's how they sit on the issue oh controversial start to the podcast today i feel like we should lighten this up well i was raised catholic so i feel you're allowed to i'm allowed to cast stones okay so i'm inside the glass house and those who are without sin should cast the first stone and of course I am without sin Well I'm without sin Because I don't acknowledge sin So

I am without it You passed away Right Yeah yeah Hello loophole Throw some stones Yeah But that's

I mean Don't let that get you down No Well I certainly haven't Yeah Have you? No No

No neither I certainly shouldn't If you were young And homosexual And hoping to get married One day at the Vatican You certainly haven't. Yeah. Have you? No. No, neither. I certainly shouldn't. If you were young and homosexual and hoping to get married one day at the Vatican, a slight dampener on your parade. Well, your dreams are certainly dashed there, I'd say. Get married in a vineyard. Less pigeons. Oh, my God, I know.

Less pigeons. So many pigeons in the bloody Vatican. And not as musty as a church. Very musty, the old churches. A musty old church. You got married in a vineyard and that was delightful. Delightful. Breezy, fresh and smooth. Smelt like lavender.

Yeah. Much better than a musty old pigeon poo. So don't be a bunch of vaticunts. Be a bunch of vaticans. Yes. ZM. Hit music. Live ZM. Fleece Fauna Megan. The podcast. Good morning. Welcome to the here. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with no Hayley Sproul today. She's away. No. She's, what's she doing? Palmerston North today. Doing the Tourism New Zealand thing.

Yeah. For the TV, for the telly. Yeah. And then she's got Marching Nationals happening in Dunedin. She's back tomorrow though. Yeah. And then away. And then away for some marching nationals.

And the America's Cup could be New Zealand's today. I didn't see what we were doing. Have you been paying attention yesterday? I didn't see the race, but a mate was like, oh, yeah, we're doomed. We're two k's behind. Then he's like, we're one by two k's. I was like, were you wrong before?

He's like, no. So Team New Zealand made up four kilometres? Yeah, crazy. How long is the total race? I don't know. That seems insane. I want to catch a replay of it today. Yeah, boats coming off their foils.

Oh, you don't want to come off your foils. And, you know, the Kiwi cockiness. We're like, we've got this today. And Jimmy Spittle has come out and said, nothing is in the bag. And if we believe anyone when he says that, it's Jimmy Spittle. It's Jimmy Spittle. Because we lost what 8-9 to him

do you remember that we were 8 was it 8-1 that was two America Cups ago right because we won last time we were 8-1 up and he beat us 9-8

yeah bloody Jimmy Spittel bloody Jimmy Spittel he seems like a nice it's annoying he seems like a nice guy but he's got the he's definitely got the Aussie arrogance.

Oh. But yeah, you're right. He does seem like... I think the Aussies prefer to that as just Aussie confidence. Yeah, that's true. Not so much Aussie arrogance. Don't get me wrong. I've got no time for it.

I'll call it Aussie arrogance. And I want to see him lose. Oh, yeah. We'd love to see him lose. We would very much love to see him lose. All right. ZM's $50,000 secret sound, all thanks to Star. Streaming now on Disney+, $40,000 the current jackpot. Uh-huh.

Lots of clothes out there. There's a video now as well. So you can pour over that, ZM's secret sound on Instagram. You can see all the wrong guesses, everything there. We'll give you another shot this morning soon at 7, 8 o'clock. The top six is coming up. Bottomless Brunches, Ban and Wellington. Oh, yeah.

Due to people vortexing mimosas, and that's problematic drinking. I mean, look, I've been on both sides of the Bottomless Brunch. I've been to them, and I've enjoyed them, but I've also been out at lunchtime for a lovely lunch with friends and seen people vomiting on tables. You've been witness to the outcomes. The viaduct. So you can see...

Both sides of it. Yeah, and I mean, surely it's not long before Auckland follows Wellington. Well, it's time for a rebrand if they say no bottomless brunches. So I've got the top six alternatives to the bottomless brunch. Okay. Coming up on the show next, though, it turns out Executive Intern Anya has been to a place with a dodgy food rating.

Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Well, the Auckland City Council has released its list of food eateries that haven't come up to scratch lately, and it's always a good peruse through the list to see if any places you always go are on the list. Yeah. Confronting, can't it be? It can be very confronting.

So News Hub have revealed this list. And four restaurants received E grades and 24 received D grades from Auckland Council between December 1 and March 9. Right. So an E grade is the bad one. That's the worst it can be. Is E grade immediately like shut your doors?

Yeah, so that's critical. That's things like infestations, cockroaches. D grades like fix it up, we'll be back. Yes. So D grade is, there was an explanation of a D grade here. D grades are given when a business needs to improve but isn't a critical risk. And there's no C. So there's A, Bs.

A and B are both open for business. That's fine. But B could be better. Yeah, and Ds are open for business. I've been to a place, a really nice place that had a D once, and I was like, we were paying, and I was like, oh, my God, look. It's got a D. It's got a D.

But, you know, it's still fine. It's the E ones. Now, there were four of these. Now, I will say that these have changed since. Because you're allowed to obviously show- There's a grace period. Yeah, a follow-up. So there is the Lansing Restaurant and Newmarket. That's currently a B, but that received an E.

Papa Tasty Kebab and Birkenhead. That's currently an A, but at some stage did have the E. Tofu Man, Somerville. Tofu Man? That's currently a grade A, but it did get an E. Is that a Northcote? I've just Googled Tofu Man, Somerville. Tofu Man? That's currently a grade A, but it did get an E. Is that a Northcote? I've just Googled Tofu Man. I don't know.

And Canton Grill and Seafood Restaurant, Newmarket. Currently a D. It's gone up from an E, though. Oh, they're on the right way. They're on the right road. And there were other D grade eateries, a lot of those, but most of those are currently in A. There's a lot of those on the North Shore,

which is surprising. Now, food influencer, Instagram food influencer Henny Noms, also producer, this surprised you because one of your faves is on the list. Yes, so this is quite close to my hairdresser and I'll often do a 1 p.m. appointment. So I finish at about 3, and boy, am I peckish.

Just a neat little snack. Are you aware how long the average female is at the hairdresser's for? Because Sade's like, oh, I've got a hair appointment at 12.30. I'm like, well, that's absolutely fine. She's like, you'll need to get the kids from school. I'm like, they don't finish till 3. She's there for hours. And she comes back kids from school. I'm like, they don't finish till three. She's there for hours. And she comes back and it doesn't look like three hours difference.

But you don't say that to her. I will say, did that take three hours? How much was... Yeah, right. How much of it was gas bagging? Because if your haircut was three hours, she'd accuse you of being at some other woman's house. Well, I probably would have been

because there's no way this takes three hours. It takes like five minutes to shave my head in the shower. How much does it cost for three hours at the hairdresser? At the salon? I don't even check anymore. Between two and three hundred

probably. Yeah, and that's not if you're going blonde or anything. They're not cheap to keep these women. Oh my God. Stop.

I'm giving you a D. I just got a D. You're a C for cancelled. So what place is this you'll go after your haircut? Yeah, the Sushi Club. I've been there quite a few times. I've dabbled in a little sashimi at 3 p.m. Oh, no.

It's too late in the day for sashimi. That's raw fish. You know that was prepared in the morning. That's been sitting in some barely refrigerated. That's why they've got a low food grade. Well, that current refrigeration. I will say that the Sushi Club Trident Drive, Rosedale, where you go, is currently an A grade.

Right. So they just had a little slip. And you know what? And that was from a D. The service has always been an A. Yeah. Will you still go there now? It's currently an A.

Absolutely. Good. Okay. But yeah, it's always confronting reading when this list comes out. Yeah. I can't see any from my neighbourhood, which is good. I'm pleased with that. This is a problem when you just go, like me, you just go burgers.

You can't go wrong, can you? Well, you probably could actually. I don't see any burger places on this. But usually your neighbourhood is, like central Auckland is usually a hot spot of D's. In the past, I remember a friend messaged me. A nest of Ds. There's a lot of Ds in the central city. But I remember a friend messaging me years ago saying,

this is where we always go for Thai. And it was like, oh, no. But that place has been demolished now. I think it's apartments now. So they couldn't even be bothered sorting it out. They would just smash it down. I think they knew that impending demolition was coming. The D was for even be bothered sorting it out. They would just smash it down. I think they knew that impending demolition was coming. The D was for demolition

it turned out. Yeah, there's no point cleaning the kitchen. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. These are reports of counterfeit cash circulating in the Manawatu area. Police have said if you are regularly handing cash

anybody in retail, hospitality, anywhere where cash is exchanging You should know how to identify New Zealand currency Because there are reports of some counterfeits doing the rounds And I don't use a lot of New Zealand cash But it's very plasticky Yeah Like how do people pass off fake Just I'm imagining in amongst other notes

or in a quick transaction or... So lots of fives and then chuck in a 50 in there. Or have two 50s and you put the real one on top and the fake one underneath. Right, okay. Or someone gives you $100 to pay for something because they want the change because that's going to be legit cash

and it's a way to get it into the system. Yeah, right. In America, you feel like a criminal every time you give them a big note. to pay for something because they want the change because that's going to be legit cash and it's a way to get it into the system and get some cash out. In America, you feel like a criminal every time you give them a big note. Or anything, even some 50s.

Yeah, they check it. What do they do? They run a marker across it and put it through a light. Yeah, they've either got a marker or a UV kind of a light thing

to check. Well, when reading this article, it had a link to the Reserve Bank of New Zealand website where it the Reserve Bank of New Zealand website where it lists security features of New Zealand banknotes. Right.

And I did not know this, but our notes, there's different series. So we're up to series seven of the current notes. Like there's series six, there's been series one. Of all the plastic ones. When they did these new plastic ones and when the series changes, they add new security features. It says Series 7 banknotes are now in circulation. You've got these are the important security features.

There's like the puzzle number, the colour-changing bird, a serial number. And you can see the queen, if you hold it up to the light, she's nude. Yeah, I believe. You can see her boobs. And the raised, where it says Reserve Bank of New Zealand at the top of the note. Yeah. If you run your finger across it, that should be raised a little bit. Oh, okay.

So you'll be able to feel the texture of it. Also, the number at the bottom that denotes how much currency it's worth, like the 10 or the 20 or the 5, that should all be raised, as well as the portrait on there. Your Kate Shepard, your Edmund Hillary, your Aparana Nata. It's a little bit... Raised. You'll be able to feel it. Yeah, yeah. Run your finger Aparana Nata. It's a little bit... Raised. You'll be able to feel it. Yeah, yeah.

Run your finger across it. Right. I've got a $10 one. Hold on. Why do you have a $10 note? No, I found it. You found a $10 note. Oh, no, it's in my other bag.

Oh, okay. Great story. Good story. Because, yeah, you never have cash. We would have cash now to... But then you've got the large transparent window with a very intricate border. How do you do the transparent window if you're printing notes at home on your colour printer?

I don't know. Again, maybe you just hand it to them in the hopes that they don't... And you cover the transparent window because it'd be easier to miss the colour-changing bird at the other end of the note. Right. There's metallic ferns, there's metallic numbers and birds.

If you are dealing with cash, this is really interesting. And then you feel like a detective, right, at work, if you're trying to bust the people with counterfeit cash. All right, well, circulating in the Manawatu, so be on the lookout. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. From the triangular ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Wellington City Council and the police,

I'm assuming Wellington Paranormal, have cracked down on bottomless brunches which they say are a clear breach of liquor licensing laws. Because that means

when you've got a liquor license you're not allowed to encourage binge drinking and excessive... Yeah, you're not allowed to say it out loud

but the implication is there. Yeah, I mean there's nothing stopping people being at your bar at 11 o'clock at night just ordering drink after drink. Yeah, I mean, there's nothing stopping people being at your bar at 11 o'clock at night just ordering drink after drink.

Yeah, I tried to get a drink yesterday on the way to my lasering appointment. What, to numb the laser pain? I took two Panadol and I thought I'll just have a whiskey on the way down. No one was open. I'm like, we're in the America's Cup. Come on, open up, get me a drink. Vaughan, it was 11 o'clock in the morning. It was actually 10.30.

Apparently, a couple of places did open at 11, but it was too late because she had to really crank it up yesterday. Oh, I was in so much pain. So I wanted a drink and a Panadol on the way. What are you rolling your eyes at? Imagine that in a far more sensitive area. No, I've got my bum hole done.

The actual hole, that hurts the least. The butt cheeks and the butt hole. The least. It's with the big expanse of the back where it's just like clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack, clack for like 25 minutes. And you're just like, ha, ha. Hon, you have no idea. You're telling me I've had a shot right up the hole. It's.

There was a slip. Wow. A little slip. Okay. There was a slip. Wow. Slip. Okay, so there was a video apparently on social media back to bottomless brunches, not bottom hole breaches. And bottomless brunches, there was a video of people sculling mimosas to get the most out of their all.

They can drink bottomless brunches. So they're off the menu now, the bottomless brunch. They say their bottomless brunch arrangements are a clear breach of liquor licensing laws which is designed to rule out irresponsible consumption of alcohol and intoxication. It's half orange juice though. Mimosas. Yeah, they said they

wooded our mimosas, right? Can you get any other drinks at the bottomless brunch or is it only mimosas? I've never been. Usually it's only mimosas and quite often as... I've never been. Usually it's only mimosas. And quite often as well, they'll only say, oh, one every 30 minutes or... Oh, that's not bottomless? That's a deep pool, but it's not bottomless.

Well, I've got the top six other names for bottomless brunches because I smell a rebrand coming. Okay. They'll say no bottomless brunches, but that doesn't mean you can't have a number six, a breakfast buffet of booze. Imagine a buffet, but it's booze. So you can walk up and you're like, I'm going to have

a whiskey sour this time. So you get a whiskey sour and you're going to sit down and you're like, next I'm going to have a Mai Tai. And you pay like a hundred bucks or whatever and then you just get in and it's just like there's just someone constantly making more drinks to put them down. I think that's a great idea. I mean, you would

absolutely get ripped. This is why New Zealand can't have nice things. Yeah. We drink too much. We have to go to Dubai for things like that instead. Number five on the list of the top six other names for the bottomless brunch. You might not be allowed a bottomless brunch, but you could have a sozzled Saturday

solution snack. Okay. I mean, the council and the police certainly aren't going to know what that is. Well, they won't come near it

if they've got a list because they won't be able to say it. So they'll actively avoid it. Number four on the list of the top six other names for bottomless brunches, the infinite AM aperitif.

Oh, I like that. Sounds classy. It sounds like almost skiing. Yeah, it does. It sounds like almost skiing. Yeah, it does. Sounds like it'd be on the slopes, but you should not go skiing after the Infinite AM Apetif.

You'll be off-piste because you'll be pretty piste. Number three on the list of the top six other names for the bottomless brunch are the Smash Sunday Sunrise Smoko. Yeah, nice. Okay. It's just a lot to work out what exactly it means, but once you know, you know. Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six other names for bottomless brunches,

Tipsy Tea Time. Yeah, nice. Tipsy Tea Time. Yeah, very cute. And you could drink it out of teapots. Yep, good. There was a big phase there in the 2000s, wasn't it? It was, yeah. Alcohol came in teapots. And number one on the list of the top six other names for the bottom of this brunch,

the Morning Mimosa Marathon. Yeah, that does sound like police would shut that down pretty quickly. You reckon? Yeah, I think so. I thought it might confuse them. They might think it was some fitness sort of thing because of the marathon in there. Yeah, right. Back to the drawing board for me.

That's today's top six. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Well, he's taken a lot of steps in 2021, our producer, Jared. He's moved in. He's cohabitating with the Middy. Yep. He's growing up right before our eyes, isn't he? Oh, he is flourishing, isn't he?

And they've taken a big step as a couple. They've purchased their first slow cooker. Yep. Well, actually, I purchased my first slow cooker. It's a little surprise for the middy yesterday. Alright, okay, but what's yours is hers. Oh yeah, true. No, not quite because

it hasn't been two or three years living together. Yeah, two years, nine months together. If it ends badly or amicably soon, you'll walk away with a slow cooker. Oh yeah, that's a good deal. If you feel like it's on the rocks, just pull the plug before two. Is it two years or three years cohabitation? It's two or three.

Yeah. But even if it's after two or three, just hide the slow cooker before you break up with her. Or smash it because if you can't have it, no one should. So you bought a slow cooker. Yep. And you messaged the group. You're like, I don't know how this is going to go.

I was like, well, you cannot go wrong with a slow cooker. That's what makes them so great. It's impossible to go wrong with a slow cooker. Well, I know it's hard to like technically screw up a slow cooker meal, but I was talking like the flavours. Oh, yeah. There's so many great recipes. Yeah, I was worried they weren't going to infuse all the spices.

Did you go sachet a flavour or did you go individual herbs? Well, I got a sachet of individual herbs. Also, hang on a second. It's the middle of March. Slow cookers are a cold climate, a winter thing. Nah, I've got time for a corned beef over summer and then you let it go cold and then you have cold corned beef sandwiches with mustard. I see.

That'd be nice, but not a hot meal on a... Yeah, but I'm trying to beat the slow cooker rush, because I always sell out pre-winter. Do they? Yeah, there's a rush. I don't think I've ever in all my years in radio talking about things selling out. Fans always sell out.

I don't think we've ever reported on the great slow cooker. Shortage. Shortage. It's the little known slow cooker shortage of summer. Is it? The yearly. What brand did you go for? Warehouse.

I don't know the brand. It was from the warehouse. Right, it was from the warehouse. But they sometimes, they stock like a well-known brand. All they do, yeah, they're living and cosy vibe, right? Okay, cool. What did you cook in it? This is where it starts.

By the way, I know the answer to this. This is where it starts getting turbulent. A little veggie korma. Vegetarian. You don't need a slow cooker for that. No. They're vegetables. They famously cook quite quickly.

The thing with a slow cooker is it's for meats. Yeah. Slow cooking meats. All day meats, baby. Yeah, but like the midi is a veggie. She's a vegetarian. Serious question. Would tofu infuse with flavours and cook nicely in a slow cooker?

Because that might make tofu bearable. Wouldn't it just slop out? I don't know. Wouldn't it just slop out? Can you? Or do you need to fry tofu so that it? No, because you can have tofu in like a curry. Marinate our tofu.

Slow cooker tofu tikka masala. There you go. Slow cooker tofu curry. Vegan slow cooker tofu tikka masala. It seems like everyone's gone for the slow cooker tikka masala. Nope. Slow cooker tikka masala. Okay, are slow cookers worth it for vegetarians.

This is from the Huffington Post. Oh, okay. Slow cookers have the reputation of being meat machines, and just like slow cooking meat, slow cooking vegetables will draw out flavours and turn you over dishes incomparably moist. Well, yeah, my corn ball was unbearably moist last night, and like the potatoes, they kind of smushed down.

Oh, your potatoes, your root veg, they've got a place in the slow cooker. Your carrots, your potatoes. Kumara can go a bit sloppy because that doesn't need as much cooking as a potato. I found mine was quite good last night, the kumara. What did the middie say when she got home and she found out you brought a slow cooker and put it on a corner? Oh, guys, the brownie points I scored last night. Now, when are you going to be allowed to cook meat in it? Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. That's the issue because we can make a slow cooker meal, but I can't put any meat in it. So currently I'm making the meal and then in a little fry pan. Last night I did up my chook.

Oh my God, that is defeating the purpose of a slow cooker. That is sad. You're going to need to buy two slow cookers. Yeah, a red one for meat and the silver one for general.

I want to make a whoops sound, but whoops are made out of leather, so you can't use those, can you? Because it's animal skin. A vegan leather would be more like a flutter. Yeah. Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast. ZM.

Okay, there's a problem if you use incognito mode on Google Chrome for anything. But we know what you're using it for. We know what most people are using it for. I'm not going to say it, But we know what you're using it for. We know what most people are using it for. I'm not going to say it, but we know what you're using it for. Here's a couple of examples. EGs that you could use incognito browsing. You've got a shopping addiction, and you share the laptop with your partner,

and you don't want them to see that you've been on the shopping websites. So you use incognito tabs. Yes. Now, it won't share. And it says when you go into incognito tabs. Yes. Now, it won't... And it says when you go into incognito mode, this will hide it from the browser history, but it doesn't hide it from your internet service provider or... No.

Anyway, like that. Yeah, it just won't save the history of that browsing. I'll tell you another good thing to use them for, airline websites or booking websites. Because the cookies, if you keep going back and looking at the flights, the flights will go up because it knows you've been there before. You've obviously gone and checked, not found it cheaper anywhere else, so you've come back and, oh, whoopsie, in that time it's gone up.

All for porn. Yeah, yeah. 90%. Yeah. But, you know, that other 10% is important that it's represented in this discussion. Well, a US judge has ruled a lawsuit accusing Google of monitoring web browsing while in incognito mode. The US judge has said it can go ahead. Apparently

a judge, Lucy Koh, said that it did not notify users that Google engages in the alleged data collection while the user is in private browsing mode. Oh, wow. And it's a lawsuit that could be worth $5 billion. Well, Other browsers have

like the Apple Safari browser has its own private browsing, doesn't it? Yeah. Was that just called private browsing? Yeah, I think so. Or something? Yeah, and it does basically the same thing. So Google tracks and collects browsing history and other web data no matter what safeguards consumers undertake to protect

their data privacy. So if you're in Google Chrome and you go into incognito mode, what it's saying is it doesn't share the data as much. Right. Like if you go into incognito mode and look at porn, it's not going to tell everyone you're looking at porn. Right. But if you're in incognito mode looking at sunglasses, it could end up meaning you get targeted advertising for sunglasses.

Wow. And people are saying, well, how does it know? And then, yeah, it is collecting information. Wow. When you're in incognito mode. So then any third-party analytics and ads can be serviced based on the websites that you visited. Wow.

I wonder how someone figured that out. Because they were, what, searching for a product and then they got targeted advertising? Maybe. Google have said that it strongly disputes and we'll defend ourselves vigorously against them. Because they don't want to pay $5 billion. Yeah, multiple billions of dollars.

But somebody else said there's definitely data collection going on while in incognito mode. So don't think you're completely off the hook. Right. But your partner won't know you've been looking at those shopping websites. Shoes. Shoes. Wink, wink.

Wink, wink. Yeah. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. ZM's $50,000 secret sound ZM's $50,000 secret sound It's thanks to Star Streaming Now on Disney Plus With hundreds more TV series and movies You can learn more at DisneyPlus.com

Soundkeeper Owls is in What do you think of Vaughn's beard and moustache trim? Oh, yes. No, I did notice. Looks very dapper. Thank you. Dapper's a good way. Dapper, yeah.

Good, good. You like that? All right, so. You like that? I do. So, big, big news yesterday. If you go to ZM Secret Sound on Instagram with the official blue tick, so you know it's a fish, there is a video that

you put up and in that video is the secret sound. Yeah, it's right there. Look at it. This is an IGTV. It's 2 minutes 43 seconds. And in usual Secret Sound video fashion, it's absolutely

jammed. A lot of scenes look like a hoarder's home. Yeah. A lot of stuff in that video. And just a lot of comedy for myself. Thank you. I'm quite funny. Yeah, we're just about to get onto that actually. Give you some kudos for that. It's always important when someone thinks they're funny that they tell everybody.

It's a great trade to have. And this is big because this means if you've got a guess for the secret sound and you can see it in that video, you're on the right track. You're a step closer. Yep, and if all the clues line up, the other ones will, hey, call up. All right, well, $40,000 is the current jackpot. Good morning, Alicia.

How are you? Good, thanks. How are you? Good, good. Now, have you watched that video? I have watched every video, every clue, everything, and tried to decipher all of it and just try and see anything that, you know, ties in with my answer.

So, yeah, I have. Okay, so you've got a guess, and have you seen that guess in the video? Well, I tried to take a screenshot and have a look and kind of zoom up. I'm assuming it's something that I saw in there. So, yeah, I'm just going to give it a guess and hope this is right. Okay, well, this is the

secret sound. What do you think it is for $40,000, Alicia? I think it's an electric keypad. You know how you run your hand over it, you push your pin code in, and then you can open up your door? Yes, yeah.

And then that's the sound of it opening. Is that the... Yeah, like it's unlocking. Unlocking, unlocking. Well, we've recently got a new front door. We've got one of these. Oh, really? Yeah, it feels like you're in the future.

You go... And then... And it goes... And it does sound a little bit like that. It's like that electrical sound in the under. Right. Okay. Alicia, are you

onto it? Are you bang on the money? I have no idea. You're about to tell me the truth. Yep, I am. True. Alright, well you do walk away with some money. But it's only a $100. That's not the secret sound. Alright, well, hey, back to the video, back to the

drawing board. It's somewhere in that video, the secret sound. Good luck. No worries, I'll keep checking it out. $100 though, Alicia. And your next guess is coming up. Fleshvaughan and Megan, the podcast ZM. God, I had to hurry that up. That wasn't right. I tried to pad for time as best I could, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. God, I had to hurry. That wasn't right.

I tried to pad for time as best I could, Vaughan. I had to swallow a lot. I know. I'm still there. Okay, it's down now. Broadcasting professional Vaughan Smith, everybody. Thank you very much. Thank you very much for coming.

Yesterday was a big grooming day for me. Because you filmed, have you been paying attention last night? And I only ever groom myself If I'm about to make a public appearance That's my rule I mean you did make a public appearance At the Wild Foods Festival No but it was Wild Foods

And it was the west coast of the South Island Everyone expects you to be a bit rutted looking You almost looked local Didn't you? I know, thank you So yesterday I just had this booked coincidentally, but it was time for another session of the laser on the back and buttocks.

Yeah. In an effort to not be hairy on the side of my body that I don't see. Yeah. Some friends of mine asked me if I get my, like, would I get my chest done? I said, I never mind a hairy chest. I don't think I would. And I can trim it easy and see it. I don't think I would because your chest would hurt. Because it's all right when there's a bit of, like,

cushioning with the old laser. Yeah. But on the bone, I reckon that would hurt. Yeah, because when I've got the butt cheeks done, no, it doesn't hurt. But, like, the upper part of the back, and they had to crank the laser yesterday. Yeah, because they're sick of you turning up.

They're like, let's just give this guy full noise. And I said, surely it can't go any higher. Because it's like... And I know I've talked to Sade about this because she's had her lady parts done, and the ladies here at work, and they're like, it can't hurt compared to this area. And I've asked the laser ladies,

and they said it's because it's a big area like your back, there's no reprieve. Yeah, it's just like crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack, crack. And it takes like 25 minutes of constant shocks to do. And it can get very, and they had to crank it. But then there's no hair. Yeah, I'm smooth. Smooth like a seal.

I dive into water and I just go straight through it. Sometimes you'll just walk up onto that road in Kaikoura on the main state highway. And you stink and you hold up trucks. I did not expect it to smell that bad. Don't touch me, says the sign. I bite. Yeah. So while I'm there, I also get my nose hair removed.

Oh, yeah. That's when they put Like a tip top stick With wax up your nose Up your nose Let it set And then yank it out No thanks I was there once

Getting waxed My back Before the laser Off and on And They said Would it be okay And you feel free to say no

But we're teaching people To wax noses And Would it be okay If we used you free to say no, but we're teaching people to wax noses and would it be okay if we used you? And I was like, absolutely. And they were like, oh my God, thank you so much. And they're like, oh great. Yeah, look at all this. So they're like pushing up my nose like a piggy nose

and they're like, look in there. And I've got like three good looking woman like crowded around looking straight at my nose. Yeah, right. I feel comfortable. I don't feel insecure about it, which is weird. And then they get the wax up there and they roll it around. And I go like, and then they're like, can we just do the hairs between your eyebrows too?

I'm like, yeah, get in, like knock yourself out. You're like a training. Yeah, I'm like a module. Yeah, yeah. A mannequin. I'm a mannequin. I'm a training mannequin. Except I grow hair.

So that gets done every time now. And if anybody needs training, I'm available. mannequin Except I grow hair So That gets done Every time now Because I'm And if anybody needs training I'm available You're available To be waxed Plucked Pulled

And ripped And When I was getting it done yesterday The girl that was doing my Nose and eyebrows Was like I'm just going to trim Your eyebrow hair

Okay The actual eyebrows themselves They have been trimmed Haven't they Goodness Yeah the length of them. So she just like brushed them up with a little brush and just did a light snip. Yeah.

And I was like, there we go. Great. And I was like, thank you for that. And she's like, not a problem. Then after the lasering and the waxing, I went to get my beard trimmed at a different establishment. Okay. Because they don't do beard trimming there. Yeah.

So I got my beard trimmed and the guy, you're like,, look at how tight this moustache game is right now. Yeah, it's really good because you don't normally get the moustache done. Not as much. No, he's angled it up from the lip, which is great because it doesn't rub on the lip so there's no like tickle. Why don't you do that all the time? Well, I'm going to from now on. I didn't know it was an option, but now I do.

And when I was there, he trimmed my eyebrows again. He ran a comb through them and put like this thin comb through them and then just went with the shaving machine over the top of it to take more length off. Well, they look good. I know.

And I said, How bushy were they? Because I go like that. Yeah, right. But I mean, this is, do you remember your granddad? You knew your granddad's, eh?

Did they have long eyebrows? and I remember some, oh, you always see old mates with the giant, I saw a guy the other day in public with pointy, big eyebrows. Giant, long eyebrows. And I was just like, ooh. My dad's dad, I always remember,

he had really long ones ever since I was a kid, I could always remember. And he would have been like 60 when I was young. Yeah. He had the long eyebrows. Well, that could be, that's you. So anyway That got trimmed twice

Yeah And then I went to TVNZ For have you been Paying attention They were doing the TV makeup And they were like Oh eyebrow And then just like

Got one hair out I was like That is the third Person today You had an assault On your eyebrows Who has had some Issue with the length

Of an eyebrow hair Yeah But now they're all And you can actually feel it Like when I rub here. Yeah. But now they're all, and you can actually feel it. Like when I rub against them, you can feel it shorter than usual. Like the shape's the same.

I haven't had it shaped at the end. Did you take it as somewhat of an insult when you came to work that we all told you that that's how you should always trim your moustache

on your beard? No. Because I didn't know this was an option either, but now I'm happy with it. Executive intern, I don't know if you are a fan of that?

She's got a mouthful. She's got a mouthful of these with her too. Yeah, sorry. Sorry for putting you on the spot there. Sorry about that. But you're a fan of this? Yes, I never want you to go back. This is much nicer to look at.

Yes, it's a sharper edge. And it's a sharper presentation for you, Smiley. And he went down on the top too. He took the top bits off on the moustache. Does that make a difference do you think? I think it does. The bit around the nose there. I mean like I don't know. I can't remember what you looked like

before but I feel like this is a much newer and improved version. It's more sleeker isn't it? Vaughan Smith 2.0. It's a sleeker moustache. Vaughan Smith. Good work. Okay well my sleeker moustache. It's a sleeker. I've bred your moustache today. Vaughn Smith. Yeah. Good work. Okay, well, my eyebrow length is short for now,

but of course they grow, so in no time I'll be back to a wizard look. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Megan, the podcast. A woman has shared her cosmetic journey on TikTok. She has had a forehead reduction. I've seen the picture of, she's a model and she paid a fortune.

So about 10,000 New Zealand dollars. I've seen the before and after and I think she was gorgeous beforehand. Maybe it's because I do have a forehead that goes to the nape of the neck. But I haven't noticed people's big foreheads until they tell me they have a big forehead. And I'mpe of the neck. But I've never noticed people's big foreheads

until they tell me they have a big forehead. And I'm like, oh, okay, I hadn't noticed. I know most people that are like, oh, that get like a nose job or whatever, I'm always just like, what? I didn't even notice that. Or people like sometimes are really self-conscious about their teeth and they're like,

I've got to sort my teeth. And I'm like, why? Well, you're your own biggest critic. Like you look at yourself in the mirror, you see maybe it's the human condition, you see all the problems, but everybody else doesn't see that. Well, she was quite insecure about her forehead.

She spent years covering it up with a fringe. Yeah. Is that why people grow fringes? Is that why people have bangs? Does Zooey Deschanel have a big forehead? I don't know what's under the hair. You'll have to Google. So she's 26 and her forehead is 8.5 centimetres,

which is two centimetres larger than the average forehead in America. I didn't even know. I didn't know there was average foreheads. You have a roller to measure. But how do you measure your forehead? Do you do it with hair stops? But you've got no hair if we measure yours. Is it from the eyebrows to the

hairline? There was a study done in 2017. The average height of a forehead is 7.1 centimetres for a male and 6 centimetres for a female. Small foreheads. Smaller foreheads, I mean, for females. Yeah. So that's why did she

have, she had a 2.5 centimetre larger than the average. We've got to build his tape. Oh, that's why did she have, she had a two and a half centimetre larger than the average. We've got to build his tail. Oh, that's fantastic. But then we don't have four. You come here. I'll measure your forehead. Do you reckon it's from the eyebrows to the hairline?

It must be. It must be. And what's the average? So the average for a female is six centimetres. It smells weird. I smell weird. I was like, oh, that's not good is six centimetres. It smells weird. I smell weird. I was like, oh, that's not good. Six centimetres.

Your average. For Executive Intern Anya. From your hairline to your eyebrows. Congratulations. Congratulations. I reckon Mounties looks average as well. Yeah. The average.

Yeah, okay. Do you have a small forehead? Do you? No, I reckon. No, I think she's got a smaller one. That looks five centimetres to me. Four and a half. Yes.

Four and a half. Are you happy to have a small forehead? Well, it's in proportion, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're small. Yeah, that's true. You're small. So do you remember where your hair went to, Vaughn?

I've got one. I shaved my head yesterday, but there is like a rogue hair. Oh, do you want me to do yours? Well, can you see the first like hair follicle? I think it's like here. That's where roguey. Take your finger away. I call them roguey.

I'm going to say there to my eyebrow. Seven. Bad news. Seven. Damn it. My hair's receding. I've got a receding. God damn it.

I've got a receding hairline. But yeah, so she paid $10,000 New Zealand dollars. Now, the thing is, without getting too gross, they basically cut and moved the hairline forward. So now she has this ugly scar, like quite a dark scar on her forehead, which I'm assuming over time will go because she had the operation in the end of January.

But now it just looks like she's got a big line on her forehead and a big scar, and I'm like, I don't see any difference really. What another option have been, and I don't know about the price of hair plugs, but do you know how they can take the hair from the back of your head and then implant it in the front of your head and it can continue to grow? Because she's not balding, so she doesn't have...

No. But I wonder if that was an option because, yeah, as you say, now she's got the scar and, like, ouch, it's like a full-blown surgery. And where do they get the... Like, is her head real tight at the back now because she had to pull the... You know, I think it's just like a rug. You move it forward. But it has to come at the back.

Yeah, maybe there's a bit of... Unless there's a wrinkle on the back of your head like in a rug. You know when there's a wrinkle in the rug and you've got to straighten it out and then your rug's bigger. Yeah, so weird. But I don't know. That's a possibilityinkle on the back of your head like in a rug. You know when there's a wrinkle in the rug and you've got to straighten it out and then your rug's bigger. Yeah, so weird, but I don't know. That's a possibility, but she's happier. She's happier, so it's her body and that's up to her completely. Yeah, but I just think $10,000 is more than you buy with $10,000.

Lots of trinkets and toys. $720, lots of toys. Lots of toys for $10,000. Keeping up to date with the news just became a little easier. As at Herald's new podcast, the front page is your short, sharp daily news podcast. Join me, Damien Venuto, every weekday morning as I chat with journalists and newsmakers going behind the headlines to break down what you need to know on the biggest news stories of the day. Listen to the front page at nzherald.co.nz slash podcasts and follow us on iHeartRadio

or wherever you get your podcasts. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Now, Executive Intern Anya Zinn. Buckle your seatbelts. I'm going to hit you with some skincare myths. So Paula's choice, she is the creator of this. Yeah, Paula Bennett. She's got a lot of time on her hands since she left politics.

Yeah. Didn't she go into real estate? But no, skincare routines as well. Good. Yeah. So Paula Bejean has been doing this for 40 years. She knows a thing or two. Question.

Yes. Is there a photo of her? Can we trust her? Yeah, hang on. Yeah, because sometimes people are like skincare specialists, but they look old. Question. Yes. Is there a photo of her? Does she, can we trust her? Yep, hang on. Yeah, because sometimes people are like skincare specialists but they look old. Oh my god, that's great skin. How old is she? Is that a recent photo or a photo from the 80s? You've asked me a lot of questions.

I've just got skincare myths, okay? Okay. She's developed a reputation for exposing some of the myths and misleading information so rampant. Scroll up. Here we go. That was in 1995, that photo. No, it was yesterday. Shh, shh, shh. I'm Mr. Scroll up. Here we go. That was in 1995, that photo. No, it was yesterday. It looks like Frank Richard. I'm Mr. Sheffield.

So I'm going to hit you with some myths. Okay. Skin repairs itself best at night. Myth. Myth. Apparently, the opposite is true. During the daytime, the blood's flowing a bit more. There's a little bit more oxygen intake.

Oh, yeah. This is why Michael Jackson used to sleep in that OxyPod thing, eh? Is it? Just, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. This is why Michael Jackson used to sleep in that OxyPod thing, hey? Is it? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no gag. No gag on this one. Just general health. He had an OxyPod.

Well, I can't remember the exact hyperbolic time chamber or something or an OxyPod. He slept inside it and it pumped oxygen around and stopped him aging and made him healthier. So, during the day,

what should you be doing? Just letting it... Just letting it... Fester. So, during the day, what should you be doing? Just letting it fester. Just let it sink in. Usually, you put on all your lotions and potions at night. That's still probably the best time because, you know, it can give it time to sink in because you're not moving around and sweating and all that. But, you know, just something interesting, isn't it?

Another common myth is that a cooling or tingling sensation means that a product is working. I'm a sucker for this. If I feel it, I'm like, oh, yeah, get in there. A mint tingle. What was that tingly body wash? Oh, Radox.

Radox mint. Was it? No, were they in the little bottles? It was like mint and something. Mint and tea tree. Radox mint and tea tree. And there was all those reviews being like, I accidentally put it on. Yeah, right.

My sensei bits and it tingly tangly. Yeah. Apparently, if your skin is doing any of those things, it is not a good thing. It means that you're being sensitized, irritated, and inflamed. None of that helpful. Not a good thing. Okay.

If it burns, take it off. A great. Good life advice there. A little anecdote from that. Yeah. Apparently, sheet masks are a waste of your time. What? You use a sheet mask from time to time, don't you?

Twice a week. Oh, those are wet baking papers. You know, people look at that photo on the ground and they look like they've got wet baking paper on their face. But it doesn't look like wet baking paper. It does look like baking paper. Apparently there is no research showing that they have an advantage over actual proper skincare products.

I thought if you put one of those sheet masks on and you leave that on for 15 minutes, that erases your sins for the previous three weeks. You're fine. If all you've eaten is rubbish food, done no exercise, you're fine because you've had that 15 minutes to absorb. Yeah. But no. But do you ever feel good after you do one of those? Yeah.

It's probably all placebo, but it does feel a little bit glowy. And scrubbing is great for exfoliation and unclogging pores. That is a? Myth! I'm just following the pattern. Everything you've said so far has been a myth. I would have thought exfoliation and scrubbing were just good for the pores.

No, no. Using an abrasive scrub, a rough cleansing brush or a loofah generates inflammation and causes micro tears in the skin's surface. I like that stuff. That was like when I was using my apricot stone St. Ives foot scrub on my face and yet, God, it felt clean. I've never felt cleaner in my life. Not actually made in Switzerland either. No.

It's misleading. No. It's made in like a factory somewhere. Hey, on TikTok, TikTok for the old say knife scrub. Why? Really? If you get on skin talk. You should still exfoliate, but not every day, right? Yes. So you want to use a gentle AHA

or BHA exfoliant. That is the way to go for healthy resilience. Or what's AHA? Because I've got my Japanese bath towel that I love. Oh, that's rough. That's more of a bath exfoliant. Well, I've got a soft. I've got two. I've got a rough and a soft. I think we're specifically talking here about facial exfoliants. Right. Okay.

For hydroxy acids, i.e. glycolic and lactic acids. That's your AHAs. And then your BHAs is a beta hydroxy acid. Use those. Yeah. Right. Not acid. I've found a recent photo of this woman that's given these myths.

And she does have a modern, like, a photo from right now. She does look fantastic. Her skin's great, so we should listen to this. So what you're saying is that if anyone listening should listen to her and not your YouTube advice, do you reckon? Probably, if she's the expert. Yeah, she's the expert. I mean, it can't hurt for us to throw our two cents in.

I mean, I'll just do a face wash every now and again. I mean, the odd moisturiser. Yeah. You do have lovely skin. Oh, thank you. You're welcome. I've just gone from putting bed oil in, just I put the bed oil over now, so I'm oiling.

On your face. I'm oiling. I'm oiling. It's still better than Producer Jared's bar soap. Bar soap. To dry. Bar soap to dry with a harsh towel, and then he just leaves it to bake in the sun.

A lavender palm olive to the face. Yeah. A soap bar. We're all wiser for having heard those skin tips. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. This next story comes to us from an article where, it's really cute, the Dunedin police do an article every week on what they had to do over the weekend.

Is it just we were at Castle Street? There's a bit of Castle Street chat. Couches on fire. A 19-year-old rear-ended another car at the McDonald's drive-thru at 5 to 3 a.m. on Sunday morning. Oh, yep. So they had to go see that.

The vehicle, they signaled a vehicle to stop, it didn't, so they found that and the person had been drink driving and then there was some street fights. Okay. Possibly between gang members,

et cetera, et cetera. But this is the story that took the crown jewel position at the top of the Dunedin police reports. A man went to a Dunedin house for an early morning Tinder hookup and apparently he got the wrong address. This dude was 32

and there was a property on Douglas Street in St Kilda and he tried to get in at 4.20 a.m. Jeez. And all the people in there were just like, call the cops. Yeah. He tried to enter the house, and when he got in, it was an alarmed resident who locked the door,

pushed him out, locked the door, and called the police. And then the man showed the police his Tinder profile when he arrived. If dare I say it, at 4.20 a.m., he was probably boozed. Yeah. Maybe he'd been out. And he showed the police the Tinder profile and said, I've been talking to Jo and she said come to this address and amongst other things discussed.

But it doesn't, they don't go into details of what other things were discussed. No. But it sounds from the story, because it is a bit light on details, it sounds like he was tricked into going to this address. Because obviously the people at that address had no idea. No. And didn't want him there. That's not a cool prank to play on some unsuspecting people who are at 4.20 in the morning with an intruder.

Not at 4. But also, like, if you were going around for a booty call at 4.20 or even any time, and someone was like, just come into this house. Let yourself in. Let yourself in. Let yourself in. That's a huge red flag, right? Yeah. Like, meet me outside. Yeah, or welcome me in.

Yeah, exactly. I'm not just walking into some stranger's house at any time of the day, let alone 4.20 in the morning. Yeah. So it was a booty call gone awry. Yeah, right. And I've been out of the booty call game. To be honest, I've never had nor made a booty call.

Now, producer Jared is telling the group chat, I'm shocked at this. At 2am, you were told, this was in your single days, pre-MIDI, pre-current MIDI, you were told just to walk in.

Yeah. They were like, they left the porch light on. They were like, doors unlocked, locker behind you. Come on in. What if somebody else came in instead of you? I don't know.

It's not my house. Did you not worry it was a prank? Nah, it didn't even cross my mind. Was it a flat? Yep. Had you been there before? Nah. You'd never been there before? Oh no! This is so much that could go wrong. How did you know which was their bedroom? It was the only light on.

And you walked in and she was there on the... Yeah. So I walked into a dark flat and the only light was the light coming under the crack of her door. So I walked out. And you'd met her before? No. No, you had to...

Holy crap. You had to open her front door and her bedroom door. Yeah, yeah. Did you knock? I and her bedroom door. Yeah, yeah. Did you knock? I did a little tap, tap, tap. Oh, my God. That's no, no, no, no, no. This could have happened to you.

I know. Yeah, it's pretty scary. This is like, what is that thing they call swatting? Like when they call the SWAT team on a phone number. On live streamers. This is like a thing. Yeah. It's like that.

I didn't know about that swatting thing. I listened to a podcast about Yeah. It's like that. I didn't know about that swatting thing. I listened to a podcast about it. Crazy, like someone's a streamer and doing really well for themselves. Or you just want to prank someone or you don't like someone, so you call the police on them and you say there's something going down in their flat. Yeah. And the swat turns up.

Jared, my goodness. I can't believe you did that. But it worked out. Yeah, yeah, it worked out. Yeah, good night. Good night, good night. Good night, good morning. Well, technically it was the morning.

It was 2 a.m. in the morning. On the back of this story, we wanted to talk about booty calls gone wrong. Yeah. Like, you know, you... Wrong house, wrong room. Maybe they live at home and you went upstairs instead of downstairs

and you jumped into bed with mum and dad. Yeah, the parents came home. Yeah. Whatever. Maybe you'd planned this booty call but it didn't go to plan. We're talking about booty calls gone wrong. Yeah. And there's no shortage of stories of booty calls gone wrong either. Sadly.

Is it sadly? Because it's entertaining for us. It's entertaining for us, yeah. But it's sadly for the people who had to live them. Somebody said, me and my flatmate, unknown to us, at the same time had both organised booty calls with people

that we'd never met before. Okay. Neither of us had met them. We didn't know what they looked like. They didn't know really what we looked like.

Oh, yeah. You know, there might have been Tinder but maybe there wasn't an in-person meeting yet. Do you know, living in the city, it's funny

because you always see people waiting outside apartment blocks with their phone, like waiting, like, and I'm always like, I wonder if that's a booty call. Yeah, yeah, booty, booty, booty, booty. Like that, exactly, just waiting there on their phone. They look a bit nervous, a bit anxious.

So they both arrived at the same time and we both went out at the same time and we didn't know which was for which. Well, the hottest one, obviously, for me. Can you bet, you can't bags obviously, for me. Can you bet? You can't bagsy another human though, can you? But also, like, you've been chatting to them on Tinder or whatever. Can you not recognise them? Yeah, maybe there wasn't too much chat ahead of the straight organising of the booty call.

Right. Hamish, you had a booty call gone wrong? I got a booty call when I was living in Taupo to go to her house after I finished work in Walkworth. Okay. So I was like, sweet, I'll finish work at five, get home, have a quick shower. I left at like seven o'clock, got to Walkworth to the address it said sent me at about 1.30 in the morning, two o'clock. Oh, wow, that's a long way to drive. Wait, so where do you live? Taupo. Yeah, I lived in Ta'clock. Oh, wow, that's a long way to drive. Wait, so where do you live? Taupo.

Yeah, I lived in Taupo. Sorry, I misheard. I thought you said, like, Auckland. I thought you were just going to... No, so I lived in Taupo, and I showed up to this address, and I was parked outside, and I was trying to call her and stuff like that, and she wasn't coming out,

so I ended up knocking on the door. Yeah. And a very unhappy husband and wife came to the door at about three o'clock in the morning that person doesn't live here i'm like oh no i'm so sorry and then i tried to get a hold of this person about two hours after that she takes me back saying oh sorry i just woke up i was on the tips so but she got her address wrong yeah so she'd got her address wrong. Yeah, so she'd got her address wrong. She's like, this is my address. So I put them to my phone.

So I did make it, but it wasn't until about 20 to 5 that I got there. Oh my god. Did you just walk in and go, I just need a little nap? Just a little nap. Hamish, thanks for your call. Some text messages in. I had a repeat booty call, but it was a. Some text messages in. I had a repeat booty call,

but it was a few months between booty calls. Okay. I organised the booty call, and then on the way over, I thought I'm not really in the mood for a booty call, but didn't organise it, didn't tell him in time. It was a knock at the door.

It was at that stage I remembered between his last visit and this visit, our bedrooms had changed because a couple of people had moved out. So I just locked my door and turned my light off. He came in and knocked on my flatmate's door, which used to be my bedroom, and tried to get in there. And in the morning, I woke up, he was asleep on the couch.

That's bad form. Someone travelled all that way. Yeah. My flatmate brought a boy home from a party once, and he got up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. And my door was ajar, so he got confused and came back into my room absolutely stark as. There was rustling and then she decided to investigate. I was asleep.

They told me the next morning he was in the right bed, but I didn't hear a thing. Oh, right. I hadn't heard, but apparently he'd gone into the wrong room. But that's your classic. And lots of Dunedin booty call stories coming in. I did a booty call in Dirty Dunners. It was 3 a.m.

I was told to let myself in. Went into his room and it was my ex who would use his new flatmate's pics after I kicked him out. Note to self, trust no one. Yeah. Don't troll. I've always said that. Never trust anyone ever.

Full stop, ever. Yeah. I once got a booty call. They told me to come around. I couldn't get into the house. So me and my friends thought we'd go through the cat door. No. It's obviously the wrong house.

You don't go through the cat door. No. Unless you're a cat. I went in first and got stuck in the cat door. The parents called me midway through the cat door and my friend ran away. And you're halfway through the cat door. And your friends just left you there. Yeah.

Stuck in a cat flap. I would also need to go to a booty call at someone's parents' house. No. Sounds like the parents aren't on board. Big chance of getting caught by dad there. I think if we've learnt

anything from this, it's meet the booty call outside the house or the flat. Yeah. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM.

ZM's $50,000 secret sound. ZM's $50,000 secret sound. It's all thanks to Star Streaming. Now on Disney+, including more originals like Love Vic. You can learn more at Disney+.com. Soundkeeper Alice is in. $40,000. Now, before we start with this caller, I have a little thing.

Guys, what if someone wins, right? Like right now, I don't have any confetti cans. I have got nothing to be like. So I'm thinking, what should I, should I prepare for something like that? Well, I feel like we should prepare because you've put up a video, a 2 minute 40 video. And in that video is the sound. Yeah. Yep.

So yes, I would, today I would purchase confetti candles. I might have a look online. I'm thinking confetti. Just go big, go home. They've still got confetti stuck in the ceiling from like eight secret sounds ago. I know, yeah. Gary said not to do it, but I see why. It's on the roof, but it's fun. Yeah, do it. There's some that we

don't buy because they misfired. Remember that time we gave away like... And they didn't go off. And they didn't go off. And we were like, yeah, you've won the secret sound. And they didn't explode. Nah. They had faulty gas canisters.

So we were still clear of that brand. Yeah, gas machine. Just like, pfft, colour. Anyway, I'll have a think. Streamers. Yeah. Okay, well, we're surely getting close now that you've released that video. Leonie joins us.

Good morning, Leonie. Oh, hi. How are you? Good. Now, you've got through the secret sound. $40,000 is yours if you can tell us what this sound is.

Right. No pressure. Yeah, I know. None at all. It's all good. It's chill. I'm thinking it's sort of polishing a diamond, such as when making a ring, a diamond ring. Okay. I know that sounds... Like with a cloth or like a machine?

No, no, it's an electronic machine, so it's this tiny little circle, and that's sort of the way they stand down and shape diamonds. Did you see it pop up in the video? Do you know what? I didn't see the video. I know everyone's probably shaking their heads. Oh, I'm going to

see it right now. But I was basing it on the other clues that I've seen. Okay, how does it match up with some of the other ones then? So I guess Titanic, the video stops on

she's holding the blue diamond, the necklace, the blue diamond. Yes, the red diamond. Greek, I may be getting close, but maybe not. The Greek,

there's quite a famous jewelers, Greek jewelers with the same spelling. Some of the videos stop on, I think one word was about a bride

and then another one is the door with the bride's zilla. So I was wondering if it's something along the lines of a ring and then the one

about the hand is about needing a hand. That's where rings go. Maybe I'm just making this up in my head. In Auckland you're still in the game. That was level three. I know and I am in Auckland. I got you on this one.

You could still have a wedding in level three but you could only have a few people there. That is true. Oh yeah, that's stretching though Vaughn. I'm just trying to connect these dots. Hey, look, it matches up. But did you go down the wrong path? I know.

A lot of people have. Yeah. Leone. Yeah. That's not the secret sound. Oh, Leone. I'll take the 100. Alright, yep. It sound. Oh, Leonie. I'll take the 100. Yep, it's all yours, Leonie.

$100 for a wrong guess and your next shot with the secret sound. Chances today at 11, 1, 4, and 5. And don't forget that video if you haven't seen it. Leonie is at ZM Secret Sound on Instagram. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Hey, you on the phone, I bet I can guess your mum's name. Well, it's time for Bet I Can Guess Your Mum's Name. We welcome Anthony.

Good morning, Anthony. Good morning. How are you? Good, good. Now, Vaughan will ask you five questions about your mum and then has 15 seconds to guess her name. If he can do that, $100 cash is yours, Anthony. Go on, Vaughan. All right, mate.

What's your mum done for holidays lately? I'm just thinking because my parents, because they usually go overseas, they're of the age now where they go and do like a six-week European holiday. Of course, it's not for Thailand. Or Noosa. Or Noosa. Or they love a Noosa, love a Thailand, love a Hawaii.

But they've done more stuff like they did the Alps to Ocean bike. They've done a couple of e-bike things with a group of friends. So I'm thinking, what's your mum done for a holiday lately? Fishing. I was a big fan of fishing. She loves a good old fish. Yeah. They go up north, they get on the boat, and they go fishing.

Okay. So that's, okay. How long are they, in subset, like how long are these holidays, like if she goes up north? They'll go up for maybe three, four days at a time. They've got a batch up north. Oh, they've got a batch up north. Yeah, they've got a batch up north. So they'll go up to batch up north. Yeah, they've got to batch up north. That gives a few name options, doesn't it?

That's a real Rachel trick. Oh, is it? Okay. Maybe it's a Rebecca vibe. I'm really picking up on the R names there. Okay. Describe for me your mother's haircut. Ooh, mother's haircut.

Haircolor, length. Okay. What she puts in it, that sort of thing. Okay, haircut, she doesn't, I can't remember the last time my mother had a haircut. She had sort of brown curly hair, so. Right, okay. She doesn't, yeah, I can't remember the last time she had one actually. Brown curly hair, okay. You don't know if your mum's ever had one. When she's had a hair cut.

Or she always gets the same sort of style. Is that what you're saying? She might just get a trim. Yeah, like a long, long, maybe just like a split-end trim maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How long are we talking? Like shoulder length? Longer than the shoulder.

We're talking past shoulder. We're well past shoulder. Oh, wow. Shoulder. See, I get what you mean. Spunky mum. Spunky hot mum. I get what you mean.

Every time you see her, she's just got the same hair. Yeah. When mums change their See, I get what you mean. Spunky hot mum. I get what you mean. Every time you see her, she's just got the same hair. Yeah. When mums change their hair, it's a massive deal. Oh, it is. My mother-in-law changed her hair recently.

Oh, yeah? She stopped colouring it, so it went grey, and then she got a perm, and we were all just like, what the hell? And then she put a purple rinse in it. My goodness.

She looked like a grey Miss Frizzle from the Madsick school bus. The Madsick school bus. All right. I feel like that's a real Joanne. He from the Magic School Bus. The Magic School Bus. All right. I feel like that's a real Joanne. He's described a Joanne. Oh, okay. Yeah, right.

Okay. So Joanne's on the list. Maybe a Donna as well. I might chuck a Donna. Donna on the list. What are your mum's siblings' names? Oh, my mother has seven sisters. Holy hell!

Yeah. So, yeah, seven of them. So I don't think even I can remember all of them. Well, give me a few of them. Okay. Adira. Huh? Adira.

Adira. Adira. Moira. Moira. Moira from Schitt's Creek. Yes. And Agnes. Agnes. Agnes.

That's really throwing you, hasn't it, Vaughn? Yeah, because I had a young, spunky mum pegged. But now I'm feeling like the scale might be moving to a little bit older. But then there's seven of them. Yeah. There is seven of them. Can I ask a subset question for this one? Where does your mum fit in those seven sisters?

The youngest, oldest, middle? Second to last. Second to last. See? Yeah. Newer name. Agnes might be the old end, and Moira and Agnes might be the old girls.

Yeah. Okay, I reckon. You're pretty good. That's actually really accurate. You're pretty good. Very good. I'm going to go with Callie. Oh, okay.

I'm going to go with Jennifer, like a Jenner, or Jennifer or Jenny, like the Jen branch of the name. Who's your mum's favourite celebrity? Does she ever talk about someone she sees on the TV that she likes? Oh, that's a good one. She must like one of the Chasers or Bradley, the host. No, she might be a bit.

She might be into Richie McCall fans. Sports? She's a big basketball fan. She's a basketball fan. Sports or she's a big basketball fan. She's a basketball fan. Right. She's a big basketball fan. So she's constantly saying LeBron James. So we'll go LeBron for the sports today.

That's throw in Vaughn as well. Now I'm going super young. Yeah, right. Okay, so more of a younger mom's name. All right. How many? I got one. I got one.

What does your mom eat for breakfast? Oh, she's been on this sort of, she has like, what is it? A lot of like gluten-free kind of thing. Oh, she's a young mum. She's a young, happy mum. I don't want to hit on your mum. I don't want to be inappropriate. Yeah.

She sounds like a hot, hot mum. I mean, I don't know. This isn't towards my tally because I've had my five, but when you were growing up, were your friends quite fond of your mum? Oh, should I? I mean, damn, I hope not. Dude, if you don't know, they definitely were. Yeah, yeah.

I hate to break it to you. You know what? You know what? Renee's on the list. Oh, Renee. Okay, yeah, good. I feel like you're in the right ballpark with these names. Definitely a younger mum.

I'm not getting like a Wendy or a Karen vibe at all. Not really. I think we're 10 years younger than Wendy and a Karen. Yeah. He's got another, just adding another one to the list. All right. So, Anthony, Vaughn now has 10 seconds, 15 seconds to guess your mum's name. If you hear your mum's name, yell out, stop, that's my mum's name,

and you get $100. Vaughan, your time starts now. Hayley, Victoria, Renee, Chloe, Emma, Jennifer, Kelly, Natalie, Donna, Joanne, Naida, Rebecca, Rachel, Lisa, Michelle, Sarah, Melanie. Yay, spell. Melanie or Michelle? Sarah. Sarah.

Yeah, very good. He did it. He did it. I don't know the spelling because it could be a funky Sarah or is it just a standard S-A? Yep, standard biblical Sarah. S-A-R-A-H. I can't believe you did that again, you are such a tinny prick You got asked this so much at Wild Foods at the weekend

How do you guess the mum's name? Like what's the thing that you do? What's your technique? You just literally write down random mum's name It's quite amazing to watch Anthony, you have triggered Or Vaughan I should say, you have triggered with that correct guess of his mum's name. Bonus round!

While you're on the phone, I'll have a go at guessing your dad's name. Now, let me just check, because we are technically still in a recession, Anthony. Executive Itunania, is there $100 cash here? There is, yes. Yes. Yes, okay, so another $100 cash here? There is, yes. Yes. Yes. Okay, so another $100 cash, Anthony. Vaughn has one guess of the dad's name, of your dad's name. Sarah and you know.

I know. I'm not. But now I can't look at you because you'll say a name and I'll be like, hee hee hee. I'm going to hide under the desk so Vaughn can't see. Don't hide under the desk. I need to read youre. I'm going to hide under the desk so Bourne can't see. Don't hide under the desk. I need to read your face. I'm going to turn around.

No. I'm not, because I don't like you winning all the time. Is Fletch, look at me, is the name from the, you know, you've got to practice your poker face. I'm putting my hands over my face so he can't read my face. First half of the alphabet or second half of the alphabet? I'm not saying, Bourne. First half? I'm not saying. Second half. Don't look. Second half. It alphabet or second half of the alphabet? I'm not saying, Vaughn. First half?

I'm not saying. Second half. Don't look. Second half. It's the second half. What are you... You can't read my face. I can.

Stop it. Stop it. Is it the second half of the second half? I'm not saying. Or is it like the middle half? Vaughn, guess a name. Peter goes with Sarah really well, doesn't it? Sarah and Peter. Sarah and Pete. I, doesn't it? Sarah and Peter.

Sarah and Pete. I'm going to go see Sarah and Pete. Troy. Go see Troy and Sarah. Troy and Sarah. Stop saying names and looking at me. Steve and Sarah. Should we go see Steve and Sarah?

Should we go see... Is that what you're locking in? You've got to lock in a name. Come on. Yeah, I'm going to go Steve and Sarah. Steve and Sarah. Steve and Sarah. I'm going to go Steve and Sarah. Anthony.

What is your dad's name? Sarah and Simon. Sarah and Simon. Again, though, you got the letter right. Steve. Yeah. Your dad should change his name to Steve. Hey, Anthony, congratulations.

$100. Awesome. He kissed your mum congratulations. $100. Awesome. He guessed your mum's name. Thanks for playing. Yesterday, after the show, we were in the kitchen. We were talking to the lovely Tony Street, weren't we, about the America's Cup? Oh, because she's hosting all the America's Cup. She's doing America's Cup stuff.

The lovely Tony Street. Lovely Tony Street. You want her to fall over when she's walking away from you just so you can laugh at her. You know, she's perfect. Yeah, she is perfect. She's got it all lined up, doesn't she? Yeah.

Lovely. She doesn't swear. Sod of the earth. I thought she was going to swear yesterday. I've heard her say a swear word. Have you? Which one? I'm not going to repeat it.

Like a light one? Like a B1? Just a light one. Just a light one. Not the C-bomb. Definitely not, no. Not Tony. So we were talking to her about the America's Cup

and producer Jared came into the kitchen. He grabbed something out of the work fridge, popped it in one of the work microwaves here, blasted it for a minute. Couple of minutes, yeah. Couple of minutes. It was a red Sistema with one of those vents on the top so you can heat things in and they don't splatter everywhere,

but the steam escapes so you don't cause a bomb. I've got a few of them. They're the soup sistema. Yeah. So, because quite often you'd make a nice, like, pumpkin kumita, coconut soup, and just make a few, put them in the fridge, heat them up. Mm-hmm. And Jared actually brought it back into the producer's booth,

and when we came back after talking. The smell, even during the heating process, the smell was wafting. You could see streeties elevated. When I came in, I actually thought he'd heated up a focaccia bread. Because it smelled like the herbs and it smelled like fresh bread. It smelled amazing. It smelled very Mediterranean. Yeah, and I was like, wow, where are we?

Lunch smells incredible, producer Jared. Yeah, where are we? Italy? The Mediterranean. I was trying to think of another country in the Mediterranean, and I fell wildly short. But he wasn't eating it. And we were like, well, what's wrong?

Why aren't you eating it? And Producer Jared joins us now to tell us why he was not eating his delicious Mediterranean-smelling, reheated ratatouille-looking thing. Because I didn't make a bloody ratatouille. I made a bloody chicken schnitty. And I reheated someone else's lunch, didn't I? So somebody else in the office came to work and put their Sistema, which looks exactly like yours,

and you took the wrong one and didn't look. You just pressed hate. Yeah, I just blindly grabbed it out the fridge, chucked it in, zapped it, brought it here, and was very disappointed in myself. A, I never reheat a schnitzel. I don't reheat schnitzel. I love a cold schnitzel.

That's a weird thing to reheat. I always make too much schnitzel, so I can have a cold schnitzel sandwich. I'm not a big fan of cold leftover meats. I won't have a cold leftover pizza. I'll always reheat that as well. No, same. I can't do cold.

Well, you're both wrong there, but I'll overlook it. Unless it's a salami, a highly processed salty meat, then I'll do that cold. Isn't reheating chicken a real roll of the dice? Yeah, I'm a gambler. Right, okay. And you didn't even, like, look or take it out of the sistema to reheat it on a plate or anything like that.

You just blindly grabbed it and chucked it in the microwave. Yeah, because it's a top-tier Sistema, like a top-tier Tupperware. So I had utmost faith in its ability to heat the chicken schnitzel. So what did you do afterwards is the question with this somebody else's lunch that you'd heated up. And you had heated it. It was hot.

I put my hand over it and there was some real steam coming out. Yeah, it had been sitting in there for two minutes, so it was piping. I just put it back in the fridge. But there was no meat in it, right? So at worst, they'd be like, this is a bit overcooked. They'd have a leathery zucchini after it's been re-heated for the third time. Do you think by the time it got to lunchtime,

it was still a semi-warm? And they're like, how did this get warm? I'm really hoping it was completely cooled and they had no idea and they're not in the office now listening to this. I hope that wasn't Tony Street's. Oh, my God. Streetie would eat a ratatouille. Imagine if I took down Streetie.

Oh, well, if she's not on the America's Cup broadcast this afternoon, we know why. Her ratatouille was falsely reheated. Compromised. I mean, there was no meat in there, so... Nah. It's just beans. No meat.

I did look, there was no rice either, because I've heard you can't reheat rice. Yeah, did you look in the office? It must be a vegetarian vegan in the office. Oh, there's quite a few vegetarians and vegans in the office. Yeah, right, okay. And you didn't think it would be the nice thing to own up to that so you could buy someone a new one?

No. No? No. Because there's still a few would be the nice thing to own up to that so you could buy someone a new one? No. No? No. Because there's still a few people I haven't talked to in the office yet. Right, you don't know. So I didn't want that to be my first initial impression. It was, hey, I ruined your lunch. Sorry.

Because I didn't check before I re-heated a container. Well, to be fair, it was the same colour as mine, so why should I have to check? It should just be red as Jarrod's container. Are we writing our name on things now? Yep, I did actually put a little printout sticker, JP. Good. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Fact of the day is about the phrase, the saying that you're feeling under the weather. Oh, yeah. Ever wondered the origins of under the weather? Hmm. Haven't thought about it. Great response there from the in-studio co-hosts there. No, I haven't.

Let me try again. Have you ever thought about the term under the weather? For God's sake, answer me when I ask you this rhetorical question. No. I mean, I've said it lots. I'm feeling under the weather. I'm feeling under the weather. I don't know what that means.

I'd love to know more. Something about a grey day? Ooh, no. You're under the clouds? Getting closer. The full saying is under the weather bow, and it is a nautical theme. Ooh, okay.

High seas, the wind would blow, and the water would rough up, and people would start getting sick. Yep. And apparently you would go under the deck into your cabin, and you would ride out the storm to avoid becoming seasick. And you were under the weather. Under the weather bow.

So whichever way the weather was coming from, it was better to be actually on that side as long as you were under the deck. Right. Because they thought it rocked less than the other side that would go up and down more if it was coming side to side. So if you were trying to avoid becoming seasick, you would go under the weather bow. But obviously, if you were down avoid becoming seasick, you would go under the weather bow.

But obviously if you were down there, you already felt a little bit under the weather bow. And you couldn't just pop to the pharmacy and get some sea legs. No, you certainly couldn't. Not in those days. Listen to the book that this came from. It's called Salty Dog Talk.

The Nautical Origins of Everyday Expressions by Bill Beavis and Richard G. McCloskey. Now that is a book I can see myself reading. Salty dog talk. Wow. And then every fact of the day for the next three months would be nautical. Would just be nautical themed. Yeah.

About the times of the salty sea dogs. With the America's Cup's on at the moment, it's good to have a nautical theme. Yeah. So maybe one or two more. There you go. That couldn't go under the weather bow, though. The ships don't have the weather bow. Neither do I.

Over the foil. By the way, I missed yesterday's race but I simply must catch a replay. How are we two kilometres behind and then we won by two kilometres? I know. Do you know, I know why we won.

I want to talk about this soon. Oh. I think I know why. I've got the reason and it's not nothing to do with the weather. Oh. Okay.

This is interesting. Well, deal with that. Are you telling me you've become an overnight armchair professional in the area of sailing like three quarters of New Zealand? Yes, absolutely. Yes. Are you telling me you've become an overnight armchair professional in the area of sailing, like three quarters of New Zealand? Yes, absolutely. Fantastic.

I can't wait to hear your educated thoughts. So today's fact of the day is the term under the weather is a nautical term where if you're starting to feel seasick, you'd go under the weather bell. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. So I honestly think I'm bad luck. And I'm the reason when I watch Team New Zealand race, I'm the reason they lose.

Every match that I've watched, we've lost. See, I felt this way with the Warriors, but then I just realised they were losing a lot. And I had no impact. So the other matches that we've won, I've seen highlights of and watched them on replays. When I've watched, when I'm like, I'm going to sit down and watch this race, we lose to the Italians. Yesterday,

for example, I went for a bike ride during race one. I got home and I was like, oh, we'd won. Great. I'll turn the tally on just in time for match two. Start watching. And then we fell off our foils and we're languishing

in the water. The Italians are a thousand metres ahead at this stage. And I'm like, well, here it goes again. I'm watching, so they're losing. And I turn off the TV only to then get news alerts 10, 15 minutes later that I'd missed the most amazing, incredible yacht race ever. This was from two kilometres behind to two kilometres in front. Yes, because they went off there for us.

Because I saw them, I was like, oh, well, they're out. They're limping. They're limping. They're just going to let the other guys win. Was it low wind yesterday? Was that one of the issues? It was a real mixed bag. It was high.

It was strong winds at times and then in spots. I like these conditions. I don't like a consistent wind. I like to see them languish. I like to see overtaking. There was a few races there where basically if you were the first to cross the start line the closest then you were awake. But as soon as I turned the TV off

I stopped watching and they won. So the key to us winning because it's what is it 5-3 at the moment yeah so if we win today's two matches

although there may not be enough win to race yeah if we win today's we've won the America's Cup both of them right

we need two more wins first seven so I think the key for the country for us to again host the America's Cup and to enjoy this victory is for me not to watch.

You're not watching. I'll just watch after the highlights. But I honestly feel every time that I'm in a bad luck. Have you ever had that when you feel like you're cursed or you're the bad luck? I've never been to a Warriors game live where they've won. I've only been whenever I go to the Warriors, like actually go to the stadium and watch the Warriors they've lost so I stopped going

right because you're the bad luck they still lose but maybe less because I'm not going but yeah I felt like and there was a good stint there of cricket when I was watching one day is so 50 overs each

where the black caps would lose if I watched so you just stopped watching yeah the one day is so 0800dONESATM, I want to ask a question. You can text him as well, 9696.

When have you been the bad luck? And it might not be sporting. Maybe it's every time you go to a wedding, they get divorced. And so you're just like, well, I'm just not going to go to my friend's weddings now because it's just me.

It ends in divorce. Every wedding I've emceed apart from Megan and Andrew's has ended in separation so far. Hello. Tell them. So don't emcee any weddings anymore. I will not emcee any more weddings.

So when are you the bad luck? Because every time I've watched a live Team New Zealand match, they've lost. So no more sailing for you. Somebody asked a message and they said, I thought I was America's Cup bad luck. So if you and this person could both stop watching, we should have this wrapped up by the end of the day.

Wind prevailing. We're not good in the light winds though, are we? I thought that was where we thrived. No, I thought we were good in the light. I don't know. I like to see the wind up and down and I want to see them falling off the foils. I want excitement.

If the last years taught me anything, I'm now a professional sailing commentator and epidemiologist. Yes, you are. Somebody said cars. They come to me to die. I have bad luck with cars. Before I buy them, I always get a mechanical inspection, and they seem to break down.

I have some major sort of issue. Not long after I start driving them, I take them back to the mechanic and they always say, what a freak occurrence. Like it's always like never, this just doesn't happen ordinarily. Okay, you are the bad luck.

This amount of kilometres, you are the bad luck. So I reckon I'm the bad luck with Team New Zealand. Every time I watch a live race, they lose. I'm not watching today's. I'm not watching until we win. And then I'll watch the recaps.

And then watch the replays. You're welcome, New Zealand. I've just thought about my friend Orban. He met Marty Guptill in England before the World Cup. And then, remember how we lost the World Cup? Yes. We've always blamed him for that. And we continue to blame him for that. Right, okay. I mean, that was probably some

poor umpiring, wasn't it? No, that was Orban. 100% Orban's fault. And still not forgiven. Ivy, why are you the bad luck? So my boyfriend plays cricket every weekend. He's in the Premier League in our city. And I went to three games last year, and they were the three games that they lost in the entire season.

So have you been banned by him, are you the one that's saying, oh, really? Wow. Yeah, no. So I was told after the third game, my boyfriend came back after the meeting in the club room and I was banned. So I wasn't allowed to go to any more games for the rest of the season. And yes, on Saturday was the first game I was allowed back too.

And? They still lost. Maybe it's because they suck though. I don't think you should take this personally. You shouldn't be taking all the blame. That's what I said. Does he spend time looking at you on the sideline and not focusing?

I really don't know what it is. I think he tried to be nice and tell me that I was a distraction. Right. Right, yeah. I just think that they need to play better. Exactly. It's not on you, Ivy. Hey, thanks for your call. Somebody said some text messages. I bought a black caps

top for the Cricket World Cup and then we lost to England and then I bought an all blacks jersey for the Rugby World Cup and we lost to England. Stop buying. Yeah, stop buying jerseys. I don't buy supporters jerseys anymore. Someone said, every single time I take part in a relationship, it falls to bits.

Maybe I'm bad luck in a relationship. It's your fault. Whenever anybody puts out a contiki and I'm there, we never catch any fish. I'm a bit like that. You won't catch fish on a boat if I'm there. Right. Just endlessly stinky hands from handling bait

and then pulling it up and having to put more bait on. That's my vibe on fish. Maybe I'm like an albatross or a banana. You don't take me on a boat. My kids lose their sport when I go. So don't. That's a conundrum. I'm a bad mum if I go, but then a bad mum if I don't go.

Somebody said my family photo shoot sessions will trigger lockdowns. Oh. Yeah. Actually, I was saying to our friend Alice at the weekend, every time she's coming up to Auckland is when we go into lockdown. So she said, I might try and come in April. I said, no, don't bother. Wait until we're all vaccinated and then book.

Yeah. Get away. Somebody said, every time I've been to a concert at Mount Smart at rain, so I do pre-warn everyone if we're about to go to a concert that I do cause rain if it's an outdoor one. Okay. I've worked at three jobs that went into liquidation and the staff were all unemployed. And I always think like, did I do this? It sounds like yes, you did at this stage.

Did I do this? Every time I pick a person to win on a reality show, they always get runner up. So I apologize to everybody on The Bachelor, Bachelorette, Survivor, My Kitchen Rules, Hell's Kitchen and any other reality show that I've become invested in. So they can never pick the winner.

They always get the runner up. So there you go. They've more than you just been bad luck. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's

free and Clinton to listen to? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Head music lives here. ZM.