ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 18th May 2021

Episode Date: May 17, 2021

Giant Baby  Strayaaaaaaa!  Quarantine Love  When did you get the date wrong?  Refund your Date!  When did you lose your car?  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleet Morn and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe by 5 McCafe Coffees. Get one free on the Maccas app. And I've just been looking at spice racks. I've looked for thin, slim spice racks. And I have come across... Now... Oh!

There's a sprinkle option on the side! I hadn't seen it! The magnetic spice can. Oh! So, this is a tin. It's got a magnet on the bottom. It'll stick to like fridges and stuff. But look, if you spin the lid the right way around,

you get sort of a salt hole situation on the side. Oh, okay. I'm not set on this though because that would, to make the most of that, need to attach to a metal aspect of your car. These days, mostly the inside of your car would be other material. Or that hoo-ha under the steering wheel? Could you just clip it under there? Maybe.

Clip it under the steering column. You could use some Velcro. Oh, you're just going to Velcro? AliExpress does have a car glove box organiser, but you could probably get quite a few spices. You could lay down the Masterfoods. You could lay down the Masterfoods sprinkles. Or the box of Griggs.

We should paint it a custom one, so when you open it up, it just like... Yeah, it's a great idea. Spice rack. Slides out. I mean, you can get inserts for drawers. Here's at iKitchen, $45 for a full drawer insert. What about, is it Howard's Storage World?

Storage World. Howard's Storage World. Yeah, talking about repurposing an already existing rack situation. Exactly. And then put that in the glove box. Yeah. Maybe tear out the middle console and have one of those, you know, in kitchens. You slide out the cupboard and it could be full of, you could slide it up.

It could be full of spices. All these great ideas. Well, you'll hear more of this in the podcast today. Enjoy. ZM. Hit music. Live ZM. Flesh, Vaughan. Enjoy. ZM. Hit music. Live the air. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. Hello. Good morning. I've done a Vaughan. I did a Vaughan this morning, Megan. Distracted. And Joe's playing and you're frantically trying to get your headphones out. Distracted by his Apple Watch settings.

I'm glad the show started so I can stop hearing about it. You two going on about your Apple Watches? We're just talking about the different things, Megan. You'd know. You've almost gone a whole year closing your rings, Vaughn. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Next Monday, 365 days in a row

of closing all three. And then, um... And then what are you going to do? I'm not going to move. I don't understand. Tuesday. Nah. Well, no, I'm getting a colonoscopy, not this Friday.

This, not this Friday, next Friday. And I had to put it off until just after that because I'm imagining the day after I'm not eating, flushing my system, getting slightly drugged up, a camera up my system. Yeah. Getting slightly drugged up. Yeah. A camera up my ass. Yeah. And then I'm imagining I'm not going to feel like exercising.

Doing some cardio that day. Nah, I wouldn't imagine so. You weren't here, Megan. I had to loan my Apple Watch to Vaughn when he broke his so that he could close his rings. That's dedication. Yeah, it was a true sign of our friendship. Exactly, yeah. He gave up his Apple Watch. I had to count my own laps in the pool. Oh, dedication. Yeah, it was a true sign of our friendship. Exactly, yeah.

He gave up his Apple Watch. I had to count my own laps in the pool. It was real hard. Oh, God. I know. It's horrible. But now he's back. And he's closing rings. Closing rings left, right and centre.

I don't need that pressure in my life. No. All right. Do you know what you're going to do for the top six? Have you decided? Not the exact wording. General topic. What's the general topic?

Well, the general topic is the axe throwing bar in Wellington is applying for a liquor license. I thought it already had it. I thought it was in a bar. I thought so too. Well, you have to delve into that. I'll do some research during the songs on that whole situation because apparently they're applying for it. And so I was going to go six other cool places that need to look a license. Raise an eyebrow.

Maybe they'll raise an eyebrow. Add to Cart is coming up at 8 this morning. So a whole list of goodies. Who's the celebrity today? Saatchi. Okay, they've picked some items. Advertising agency Sachi and Sachi. Not the band, the advertising agency

Sachi and Sachi. They've picked the items today, so we'll give you the first item at 8 o'clock this morning. I'm actually listening to Cart. Next on the show, there is another TikTok warning. We had one the other day about the don't sit. This is how we are in society now.

We have to warn about TikTok videos. Don't sit in swings, like in infant swings. You'll get caught. You'll get stuck in those. You'll get stuck. Well, this one is a warning about a cleaning hack, which is doing the rounds on TikTok. Okay, because TikTok's the home of many good cleaning hacks.

Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Another warning over TikTok videos, this a cleaning hack where you put fairy dishwashing liquid, which I'm guessing is like, you know. Sunlight. Yeah, palm olive or whatever. A brand. You use a brand.

I know that Americans are big on dawn Dawn Dawn dishwashing liquid Makes the best bubbles Does it? Like the best mega bubbles Like if you were going to blow bubbles for example Right

There's an online recipe Oh right That includes dawn in there Like you've got to use dawn It's got something in it Good for bubbles Yeah Probably not good for the environment

But great for bubbles I was just going to say It doesn't sound great for your plates and stuff But anyway This is a hack where You freeze in an ice cube tray Probably not good for the environment. Well, no. I was just going to say it doesn't sound great for your plates and stuff. But anyway, this is a hack where you freeze in an ice cube tray, you freeze the dishwashing liquid. Okay. And so the stuff that they've used in this video, it's green.

It's like a palm olive, your traditional green dishwashing liquid. Gotcha. And then you put those frozen cubes onto like trays, oven racks, and they slide around and clean them. That's the hack. So on oven trays just on your bench, not in the oven? Well, yeah, I don't know if you have to have them on or not. Like hot? Maybe hot.

Yeah, maybe hot or heat them up and then they kind of sizzle around and clean the trays. Anyway, the- Is there a video of this working? There isn't a video of the hack. There's a video of the frozen ice cube trays. And the warning that because these look so delicious, kids could eat them. That's the warning. Right. But then, I mean, what are you going to lick it and then be like-

You're not going to swallow an ice cube, are you? No, not in one. Although, have you ever swallowed an ice cube? I don't like it. It's real weird. And then you're just like, oh, my God. Yeah, am I going to have frostbite in my tubes? And you feel like you're about to choke,

but it's melting at this insane rate. Yeah. Yeah, okay. I can't find. Oh, scroll down for video. That's what I want to see. I want to see if this actually works because this sounds like something that's just going to make a hot mess. Oh, because I tried one of those hacks with, you know, your sustainer gets all stained from the bolognese and stuff.

I tried one of those hacks. It wasted my time. What was the hack? It was bloody useless. It was like Fill it up And then there were paper towels And maybe baking soda And I was like

You've just absolutely wasted 20 minutes of my time Right And a lot of shaking and stuff And it didn't work Yeah Surely if you just get a bit of Jeff on that That'd just scrape it off

So this video I'm watching This is She's used it to clean oven racks Yeah You know like the The wired oven rack. Right. Let's get the spray.

I mean, that's quite plastic, isn't it? No, it's all soft and stuff. She literally could have grabbed like a Goldilocks, like one of those scrubbing things, and scrubbed it off. But does she heat it up, or she just runs the frozen? She runs the frozen thing over the thing

while it's in the sink. Yeah, right. I'm calling a bit of bullshit on that, to be honest. Okay. I don't think it would work. It would certainly work no better than just getting a bit of elbow grease on a... Yeah. Or a stilo.

Or a spray. Yeah. Are you talking like an oven cleaning spray? Yeah. Oh, that shit's dangerous. Yeah, it is. That shit's crazy. But just spray it on everything.

Walk away. Come back. Is that how it works? No, because you still have to wash it off afterwards. Don't you have one of those new ovens that just... Self-cleans. You put it on 5,000 away, come back. Is that how it works? No, because you still have to wash it off afterwards. Don't you have one of those new ovens that just... Self-cleans. You put it on 5,000 degrees and it... That's pretty much what it does.

It just bakes everything. Cranks it up to like over 500 degrees and everything gets baked to a cinder and then you can just like wipe it. Is that also like a mini crematorium? Yeah. You probably have to... If the family pet dies?

You probably have to cut the dog in half and put them on an oven rack each. I don't think you'd fit a whole Labrador on one oven tray. And then you'd need the hack about the frozen thing to get the Labrador stains off the oven rack. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay. Wow.

Well, that went dark quite quickly. God, don't tell Sade that because she was all about, we need a 900-wide oven. And I said, we don't. Now we can't crematorium the dog in there. She'll be telling me, see, I told you we needed the bigger oven for all the animal crematoriums we're doing. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

Someone asked online, I think this was on a mum's, like one of those mum's sites. Oh, yep. Like a group on Facebook. Like, yeah. They wanted to see their biggest baby than anyone had had. Like, show me your big babies

when you had them. And one woman had knocked everyone out of the park. She showed everyone her 5.6 kg baby, which is 12 pound something something. 12 pound 6 ounces. And it was described as the size of a three-year-old. It's a very tall... Does it say it's a year old?

It doesn't say its length, but it's 5.6kgs, which is heavier than my almost four-month-old son. How heavy is your almost four-month-old son? He's five. 5kgs. 5kgs, which is heavier than my almost 4 month old son. How heavy is your almost 4 month old son? He's 5. 5kgs. 5kgs. A 3 year old would be more than 6kgs? No, it's the size, so like the length.

Oh, right, the length. As they're holding him up, he looks like he could be. So this baby's weight was more attributed to its length than its overall size. So she was, when she went in at 37 weeks, so a few weeks before she's due, and they said, look, we reckon it's about nine pound,

which is decent, nine pound, 15. So they were like, we better schedule you in for a C-section. The day before she's due to go in, she goes into labour, and they go in there and say, he is large. We advise that you still have the C-section. And as they get this child out, he looks like he should already be paying taxes.

He's just really, he looks like a toddler. He's giant. Looks like a toddler. Because I still look at Bastion and I'm like, I don't know how any of that fit in there. But I just don't know how this kid fit inside of someone. Yeah, right.

Because how heavy is a bag of spuds? One of those big bags. You can get like a 10kg one, right? You can get a 10kg bag of spuds. Okay, so half of that. You can get a little 5kg. A little 5kg. A little 5kg.

Well, next time you're at the supermarket, pick up a little 5kg bag of spuds. Yeah. Because I was thinking five boxes of Weet-Bix. But then those are all square, so it's hard to imagine that as a baby shape. Is it a kg, one of those boxes? One of those big boxes is...

Is it a kg? Is it a kg of Weet-Bix, right? Blocks of butter would be another way to think about it. Yeah, that's what I was... I was trying to figure out how many blocks of butter. 10kg. How... It's 5kg. 11 blocks of butter. Yeah, that's what I was trying to figure out. How many blocks of butter? 10kg. It's 5kg.

11 blocks of butter. Yeah, 10, 11 blocks. I remember there was one of these stories when I was flatting with my old flatmate Sam was Tongan and there was a story about a German woman who had had a big baby. And it was like 12 pound or something. He's like, hold on, that's nothing. Hold on, I've just got to confirm something.

And he rang like an auntie or a cousin and he's like, yeah, that's right. I think he had a 15-pound cousin born at birth. How many kgs is that? That was 10 pounds, did you say? The one that's – This is a 12-pounder, so that's – Oh, wow. Okay, so that's big.

15 pound is 6.8 kgs. A little bit of a look into the heaviest baby ever born. Lord. Oh, it was a giantess. So this woman was 7 foot 11 tall. Okay. Oh, right. And she gave birth to a 22-pound baby. So that's 9.98 kilograms.

You're asking for the C-section there, right? Yeah. And that year, by the way, was 1879. Oh, my God. And that's by the way was 1879 Oh my god And that's still a record today Yeah But were C-sections available then? No I don't think so

She pushed Because I watched the first few episodes of that TV show The Nick And that was the introduction to that He was trying to perfect the C-section Right And that was like early 1900s Right And that was like in New York. Right. And that was like

in New York. That was, this giant test didn't live in New York and have access to all the best. There's actually a publicised

medical paper called Term Birth Weight Centiles for Babies from New Zealand's main ethnic groups. Yeah. And it talks about

average weights of different babies. Mean birth weights by ethnic groups. Tongans win that. Yeah. The Samoans second and Europeans third. Tongans weighing in the average Tongan baby 3.7 kgs. That's pretty average.

Yeah. And Samoan 3.691. Average European 3.5. Maori 3.4. Same with Chinese. Indian 3.691 average European 3.5 Maori 3.4 same with Chinese Indian 3.1 so there's in the mean birth weights

in New Zealand Tongans are leading that charge too that's a lot to squeeze isn't it yeah because they okay

you put the fingers in the corner of your mouth and you pull out and that's exactly what it's like not exactly like but that's what the midwife taught us

would give us a taste of what our partners were going through. Wow. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. From the ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hello. Today's top six are the Sweet Axe Throwing Company in Wellington is applying for a liquor license.

This is an on-premises license. Okay. They applied to Wellington City Council Licensing Commission. And so the rules of the conditions of the license, customers limited to two drinks each over a two-hour axe throwing session. Anybody intoxicated barred from participating and people who would consume alcohol before they arrived would be turned away from the venue. Oh, okay. The police have said...

this. They're going to put their hands out and like, hmm, alcohol itself is a risk-increasing factor. It directly impacts behaviour and increases the risk of harm, and they are throwing axes. See, I'd trust myself to throw an axe up to two drinks. I get pretty silly after two wines. Yeah, I'd trust myself to throw an axe up to two drinks. I get pretty silly up to two wines. It's a bit like pool, though.

You're a lightweight, you're not coming to the extra. Yes. It's a bit like pool. There's that sweet spot where you get real good, but then all of a sudden you have one too many and you're really bad. By the time you get to that sweet point, you've already drunk too much. So there's this real five like, five-minute window where you get a couple of loose goose shots

and you say, oh, yeah, that's Pythagoras or some triangle buzzwords. Yeah. And away you go. But, yeah, two drinks maximum. The Sweet Axe Throwing Company have said it would be safe in responsible conditions. You are always watched by three people, the server, the expert, and the staff supervisor.

Well, that makes sense. Yeah, people listen to us. They don't want to get kicked out. I mean, they're paid to be there. Yeah. And if they're drunk on arrival, then they can't pay to be there. They just can't be there. Fair enough.

So, you know, they're going to be responsible. Yeah. Better than a bar packed full of hundreds of people, of which you can keep an eye on about five that are at the bar at the time, and the rest are just getting insanely plastered and aggressive. Yeah. Put that out there. So I've got the top six other places that sound like they need to look a license.

Okay. Right. This is just six places I'd pretty much like to have a beer. Okay. Number six, the chainsaw shop. Go into the still shop. I think that'd be a max one or two beers place as well. One or two, and then there'd be some guy there

who'd be like, watch this, start a chainsaw and just like pop a beer top off with it. Like precision chainsaw engineer. And it just... Catch the... Yeah, that'd be good. Cool. Number five on the list of the top six other places that sound like they need a liquor

license are carnivals. Oh, yeah. Like on the Ferris wheel. Yeah. Have a beer. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, right.

Or that Gravitron thing that you get in and it starts spinning real fast and you can't pull yourself off the side. Imagine just being like... You're trying to drink your mojito. Yeah. Gravity. Holding that glass still. And then you turn it and the centrifugal force just pushes your whole drink into your mojito? Yeah. Really holding that glass still, and then you turn it,

and the centrifugal force just pushes your whole drink into your mouth at once. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six other places that sound like they need a liquor license are hospitals. Have you ever been stuck in a hospital waiting room? A couple of drinks, Pastor. A couple of drinks, yeah. Yeah, a couple of just kind of defeats the purpose of public health. Yeah, right.

You can't have a wine in there. Well, there's a rule saying you can bring your own. You have to be subtle about it. Maybe out of a mug rather than a glass. Just have a couple of... Yeah. It's definitely coffee. A couple of time passes.

But like those people you see outside holding their drips, having a ciggy. I know. And their gowns. You're like, are you helping yourself here? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, interesting. Interesting. are you helping yourself here? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, interesting. Interesting.

The reason I'm here is unrelated. Mind you, those sweet tax dollars because they're getting from the cigarettes probably built the hospital in the first place. Yeah, that's true. Number three on the list of the top six other places that sound like they need a liquor license are woodworking workshops.

Oh, yeah, because nothing can go wrong there. Yeah, probably not too close to the lathe No But if you were just Using the bandsaw Why not Number two on the list Of the top six

Other places that need A liquor license The arcade Oh yeah So you could Play Mario Kart Have a couple of beers Play Mario Kart

At the arcade Yep Do the dodgems Do that thing where you Shoot a little Well you can At that place in Auckland Yeah what's Archie Brothers Archie Brothers yeah Archie Brothers you can have A couple of drinks And then go on the bumpers Dodgems, do that thing where you shoot a little. Well, you can at that place in Auckland. Yeah, well, it's Archie Brothers.

Archie Brothers, yeah. Archie Brothers, you can have a couple of drinks and then go on the bumpers. Dodgems. Dodgems, yeah. Yeah. Great fun. Okay, then.

It's on the right. And number one on the list of the top six other places that sound like they need a liquor license, Mitre 10 Mega. Because that's just your dream. How good would it be? You walk in, you scan in. They're like, how are you?

There's someone always at the door. How are you? Good, thanks. And they're like, what are you after? You'd be like, I don't know, just a parallel, I suppose. They pour you one. Your trolley's got a little beer holder. You could basically live in Mitre 10, couldn't you?

It's got a barbecues. Yeah. It's got everything. You could make your own bed out of the outdoor furniture. Yeah. I actually could. Yeah. can make your own bed out of the outdoor furniture. Yeah. I actually could. Yeah. I could go to the cafe if I got hungry. Yeah. I could definitely live there.

Just need that sweet, sweet pale ale on the way in. That is today's top six. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Capture. You know, when you're logging on to something and it asks you to Like we just said Identify everything with a power pole in it

Or a vehicle Or a Traffic light Traffic light Yep CAPTCHA Stands for And this I did not know

I assumed it was an acronym Because it's always in capitals Oh okay But I'm always so angry at it By the end of things I don't want to like look up what it is C-A-P-T-C-H-A. What does that mean?

Computer? Nope. Completely automated public Turing test to tell computers and humans apart. Remember Alan Turing? Oh, yeah. He's like the father of modern computing. He was like in World War II.

He was a code breaker or something, wasn't he? Yeah, and Benedict Gumbelbach played in that movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Completely automated public Turing test to tell computers and humans apart. Well, an online security firm says it needs to be in the bin because every day capture costs humanity as a collective 500 years of their time. So every day people are looking at it for a few minutes and enough people are doing it for a few minutes

that it adds up to 500 years of time. That is some wasted productivity. Are they, is Capture also the letters and they're all like ghost looking? What does this say? I assume so because it's not like you're capturing, Capture isn't intrinsically linked to a picture. And there's like five or six letters and numbers and you're like,

is that an A or a four? Yeah, or an A or a three. I know, yeah. I prefer the ones with pictures, but then you do one of them and then you go to another one. And you're like, well, did I fail that? Or it doesn't just want me to do three. And sometimes you've just got to like click, I'm not a robot,

and that's enough. Yeah. So why can't we just do that every time? Exactly. But that one's based on how long it took you to click that. Because apparently if you were like a robot going through, you'd click that automatically. You'd go click, click. But when you're a human, you like look on the page

and you're like, oh yeah, click. And then click again. Right. And there's a bit of a timing thing. 500 years a day. Of the 4.6 billion global internet users, the average user sees one capture per 10 days. Oh yeah.

And then the time it takes on average is 32 seconds to complete it. So that adds up to 500 years of wasted time every day trying to prove to robots that we're not robots. Do you think it would be less if they stopped putting like a slither of traffic light and pedestrian crossing in another square? Yeah, make it cut and dry. Yeah.

Yeah. Like there are three squares with something in it. That would be a better way of doing it. Yeah. Click the three squares containing a vehicle. Because then if it is a slither, you're like, well, I'm not going to click that because I've already got the three squares.

Could it not be as simple as click the yellow squares? Or is that too, would a robot get that? No, because then people are colourblind. What about the colourblind people? Then colourblind people would be like, yeah, that's true. That's true. I'd never thought about that. About

the simplicity of the test being, although you could, then you could do like all the simplicity of the test being. Although then you could do like all the squares with the letter something like W, but then that's not. Not everybody sees a W and recognises it as a letter of their language. What about click all the smiley faces? Emojis.

Yeah. Something like that maybe. I don't know. Yeah. But yeah. 500 years a day. A day. That is madness.

That adds up, hey? So they're saying to get rid of it and their system that they are proposing to replace it would be a security key that can be plugged into a computer or connected to a mobile phone, which is then verified. Oh, God. Who's got that on them all the time? Yeah, but that's exactly.

Don't carry that around. We can't win. I'll just keep clicking on road signs in this picture. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Australia. Australia. Australia. Australia.

The Florida of the South Pacific. It really is. That's a great title for it. It's got a lot of the same things. Old people retire there because it's warm. Yep. It's a lot of war loft. Yeah, so much war loft.

They've got, over there they've got gaiters. And in Australia they've got crocs. Yep. And it is a croc that is in the news. And the man that rode it like a surfboard. This is the most Australian thing you'll ever see. Peter Pitt have slammed the actions. Why have Peter Pitt come out and...

Huh? What's Peter Pitt got to do with it? P-E-T-A. Oh, Peter. Peter. Yeah, the animal. The people for the ethical treatment of animals. Yeah. They're not without

their faults, though. They have said that it is the most Aussie thing ever, which sounds like a compliment to me, especially if you're Australian, but then goes on to say, animals are not surfboards. We should not be applauding a person who surfs on a crocodile. We should applaud jockeys

who whip horses or marine trainers who torment dolphins. Let me tell you what this guy's doing and what else makes it. Super Australia. Yeah. So these lads, this guy's, by the way, dressed like a tradie. Hiver's shirt, just so everybody can see him. They were out in their little tinny boat and apparently this big croc went to steal their crab pots. Oh, yeah.

So this guy put a rope around the crocodile. It looks like he got the top half of its chompy jaw bit. Yeah. He got the rope around that, and then he's standing on the back of the crocodile using the rope to balance, and he's surfing the crocodile. Is he like insane? Like you fall off, you're dead.

What does stop the crocodile from diving down under? Like if it went down under the water and you became buoyant, then you float up. Also, they're known for their death rolls. They literally grab their prey and then roll them into the water.

I don't know. You're in his territory now, sweetheart. I don't know what's going on. I mean, yeah, you shouldn't surf a crocodile, but if you do, like, kudos like that. It's pretty amazing. They reckon it's around a five-meter long crocodile. It's humongous.

It's humongous. Well, he's literally standing on the back of it and balancing. Yeah. And it's still floating. Do you think it was unaware? Because he's not a big dude. He's not a huge unit.

I don't know. I don't know the whole situation with it. Because you know there's like laws in New Zealand if you get too close to whales and stuff. Yes. You're not even allowed to fly drones over whales. No. You go directly over whales.

You get the odd person kayaking into an orca pod and the Department of Conservation are like, don't do that if you see the orcas, leave them alone. Whereas what? Do you think there'd be any rules about this? I can't see. There's nowhere in this. I don't think they've ever had to make a rule

because, you know, common sense. No, but you think about Steve used to fling himself on a croc, didn't he? And hold his jaw shut and tape it up and then be like, look at this beauty. I reckon he's probably surfed a croc in his time. I reckon he's looking down from his special spot in Australia Zoo heaven.

Yeah, that boy. Look at that little beauty. This guy's got the Steve Irwin mullet too. Yeah. It's an incredible video to watch, boy. Look at that little beauty. This guy's got the Steve Irwin mullet too. Yeah. It's an incredible video to watch, yeah. Yeah. I mean, definitely not something I would do. No, no, Scylla.

I don't think it's going to be encouraging many people to do this. Nah. Because the risk is like death, really. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's what's happening here. Australia.

Australia. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. This is Fleshfauna Megan, the podcast. ZM. This is just the cute kind of story we need. Lots of people in quarantine doing, you know, isolation and stuff when they have travelled. And it's a pretty lonely place.

Did you see that they're sending the debt collectors after the people in quarantine they haven't paid? Get them. Get them. Are they going to the quarantine hotel? No, they've like checked out like ages ago. They have 90 days before they get in to pay, right? And they're reducing it to 60, but they're also sending the debt collectors around.

Oh, yeah. Because how much does it cost? It's like two or three grand now. It's three and a bit, and I think it was going to go up soon. Okay. Yeah. Okay, well, that's pretty negative. Well, you want to come home for a little holiday, don't you? a bit and I think it was going to go up soon. That's pretty negative.

Well, you wanted to come home for a little holiday, didn't you? True. Well, this is in the Travel Lodge Hotel in Melbourne. Two people were in quarantine and they've found love in a hopeless place. In a COVID place. In a COVID place. Love in a COVID place.

So they joined a facebook group for people who are also stuck in quarantine um i don't know if they were people that were stuck in the same hotel or whether it was just general quarantine chat oh yep but anyway they managed to find out that they were um a room above and below each other directly in the same hotel okay so cute something hotel. Okay. So cute. Something they're like to bond over. Knock on the pipes. If you want me. Oh God. I'll be like, oh my God, can you hear me flush the toilet in five seconds? Ready? If the answer is no.

So Vanessa got a message from Anthony who was directly below her on the seventh floor and he's like, hey. This Facebook group's dangerous. Why? They're supposed to be isolating. This is just tempting them. Yeah, it is. Because it is if you see someone on the group you like the look of and you flick them a

little message. Oh, if they were in my hotel, I'd 100% be sneaked down to my room later. Yeah, exactly. You've got no patience. No, what if they have COVID? You're not about to long game. I don't want it. I'm in there for 14 days.

Just say I got it in the lift. You are a super spreader of COVID amongst other things. So yeah, she said it was like really nice. You had this little community of people to bond with and then suddenly like she had this friend. Yeah. And a friendship grew. They played online Scrabble against each other.

They would watch Netflix together. So like maybe over like FaceTime watching the same thing. Do they do that thing now? Is it Netflix or whatever? They watch Disney Plus. So like maybe over like FaceTime watching the same thing. Do they do that thing now? Is it Netflix or whatever? They watch Disney Plus. Disney Plus does it. Yeah. You could sync up with your friend's Disney Plus account

and you could watch something at the same time. Where was that? We lived in America and New Zealand for seven months. We used to like try and sync up a movie and then watch it over FaceTime together. So I guess that's what they were doing. Yeah. They would order takeaways at the same time up a movie and then watch it over FaceTime together. So I guess that's what they were doing. They would order takeaways at the same time and then they'd see whose

food was delivered first. It was a race. Then they'd give each other a heads up when the nurses were coming around to do COVID tests. This is so far my idea of an ideal date. All of this. Just all happening over the phone. But they waited. They were like, okay, over the phone. Yeah. But they waited,

they were like, well, okay, this is cute and stuff, but they were going to wait, obviously, until they met in person to see if there was something more there. They went on a picnic together and it turned out to be their first date and they're like in love now. How cute is that? They both had plans, like big plans about

life. So he was going to do a two-year-long motorbike trip around the world, and she was moving to Latvia. But obviously both of those plans. What? Latvia? Those are two outrageous adventures. These two people. Absolutely God knows.

Outrageous, right. Both of those plans went out the window. Right. And now they've found each other. So how long have they been dating for? How long have they been out of ISO for? Hotel isolation. I don't know.

A wee while. Because I wouldn't be rushing to the media with this true love story in the first two weeks. Because the media is going to come back in a few weeks. Oh, on Saturday. It says it's a year since they walked out. Oh, okay. So it's been a while.

They're celebrating the year. Okay, so they waited a year before they went out there. Oh my God, that's so cute. Do you think when they finally get married in, say, like four or five years, they'll do it at the Travel Lodge Conference Centre? They should. They should.

And all the guests have a, like, room and the wedding's done over Zoom. That would be great. Sounds lovely. Yeah. And they get takeaway Nando's or something. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. It's an ISO wedding. Get a local curry Nando's or something. Yeah, 100%. Yeah.

It's an iso. Get a local curry. Yeah, exactly. Whoever gets their local curry in a little plastic container with what the local curry is written on top. It's a great idea. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Shallow Dive.

Shallow Dive's where we look into a subject not with any great depth. It's not like a six-part podcast series or anything. It's like a seven to eight minute chat. It's not a deep dive. It's a shallow dive. Yeah, exactly. And today we're talking about polyamory and we're joined on the phone by Anonymous. Good morning. Good morning. How's it going? Good. Thank you. So what is your definition of a polyamorous relationship?

My vision of polyamory is maybe a little bit different than the traditional version. So the traditional version is most people have like one primary partner who would be kind of like your traditional partner or spouse who, you know, you're in like an intimate relationship with, your lives are kind of entwined with each other, you might live together, and then they'll have potentially various

like secondary relationships. So it kind of differs from an open relationship in that it's not just sex. Feelings are potentially on the table and that's all cool. Right. So you have your primary partner and then you might have other partners that fulfill things like sex or other stuff. Hobbies. Hobbies. Yeah.

So for me, I actually don't have a primary partner. I'm what's called like solo poly, basically because my life is pretty like intense and busy at the moment. So I'm not actually looking for like a full-time, live-in, intense partner. So I just have like, depending on how you define it, maybe three or four secondary relationships. So those relationships can be kind of like committed and loving and intimate. But not exclusive.

Yeah, not kind of getting everything from one person. And they all know about each other? Yeah, they all know about each other. Some of them have met each other. Because a lot of people listening would be like, God, it's hard enough with one. Like, how do you juggle four or five? But then if you have one, you're kind of putting all your emotional and sexual eggs

in one basket. So you're sort of expected to provide all the emotional support, all the, I guess sex, all the everything for one person. And that's kind of actually quite an intense thing to sort of be everything for one person. Whereas if you're seeing

multiple people, then you're kind of... Sharing the load. Yeah, exactly. Now that you've explained that to me, it actually makes a lot of sense. Perfect sense, yeah. Yeah.

And then some people, you might have like a really intense sexual connection. Other people, it might be more of like an emotional or cerebral connection. I have, it might be more of like an emotional or cerebral connection. I have trouble separating them all, though. Like, what about the person that has to listen to all your problems without thinking there might be sex at the end of it?

You push through that stuff, so you get the good stuff. There's always sex. That's right. One person's not your just problem person. Oh, okay. I was reading it as like that person. The guy that doesn't reply to messages

must have a phenomenal penis is what I was thinking. Because you're like putting up with kind of semi being ignored because he's useless at communication. No, but he's a sex guy. He's a sex guy, I know, but then I was thinking, what about the other people? What are they doing? But they're sex people as well. No one's going to just be that. That's what I thought.

No one wants to be the bitch and moan person. No, no. Okay, now I got you. I feel wants to be the bitch and moan person. No, no. Okay, now I got you. I feel like spreading out the bitching and moaning is a good thing for everybody. So sex across the board, but one person might be food and sex. Someone might be like outdoor activities and sex. Or like deep philosophy, you know, deep thought and spiritual. And sex.

I love how you have to, everyone has to have that label. Everyone has a role. Yeah, spiritual, yeah. And sex. I love how you have to, everyone has to have that label. Everyone has a role. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I'm just thinking like, so I've got three guys. How do you, like what if you, there was one that you just really preferred to be with intimately? Like what, is there not jealousy with them when it comes to like sexual stuff? Like, and how do you stop

comparing and are you ever asked questions about like are they better than me? Is outdoors guy better than me? Says food guy. Yeah, yeah. No, I don't think anyone would. Because no one wants to know the answer to that, right? Unless you're like

really, really sure you're the best. You're not going to ask if you don't want to know. And I mean like there have been a couple of times where there's been like some minor jealousy. Like one of the guys I'm seeing, I used to get very slightly jealous

of some of his other partners. But that was more I guess like, not so much sexual, more like an emotional thing. But I kind of don't anymore. I don't know. Right. I just, I don't think I've ever really been a particularly sexually jealous person. Like, and I've had, I've had open relationships before.

So, yeah, I'm not like super jealous about that kind of thing. I don't think it would work if you were. Yeah. And I think a lot of jealousy to do, also is to do with insecurity. Like, if you feel secure in yourself and I think a lot of jealousy to do also is to do with insecurity. Like if you feel secure in yourself and you feel secure in your relationships,

then you're not as jealous. It's really only if you do have that kind of, you know, that worry, like is this person better than me? Do they like me better than them? Do they, you know,

are they going to leave me for them? But if you're kind of like set that stuff aside, then it's not so much a issue. I just can't imagine thinking about like someone you care about being with someone else

like that just I do get that and that's why I'm like you know obviously Megan probably wouldn't work for you yeah no I'm willing to admit that but that's okay like that's totally fine and I think as well like I think if I did have a primary partner who I was, like, married to or, like, really, really invested in,

I probably would want to put some rules around other relationships. And I think, obviously, if you do have a primary partner, then, like, for example, like I was saying, one of the guys I'm seeing who's married, obviously his wife is, like, top priority. And I know that. And I'm totally fine with that. That's how it should be. So rather than an exclusiveness in their marriage, it's more of a priority. She's always top priority.

Well, it just sounds like everyone has to have Find My Friends on an iPhone. Know where they are at all times. Just so I know what you're saying tonight. See, again, that's the jealousy creeping in. It wouldn't work. No, yeah. So, like, it's not just about sex.

That's kind of the point, is that, like, it is, I mean, the relationships that you have with people can be, like, really loving and meaningful and intimate, like, in a different way than, like, a full-time monogamous relationship would be. Well, very fascinating. Very fascinating this morning. You've actually explained it to me like I fully understand.

That's very well done. But I do know that it's not for me because I'd be the angry one. Yeah, yeah. She'd be the one tearing down someone's door. Get out of here. Yeah, pretty much. I know that about myself. Ask the questions, as you said, that you don't really want to answer.

Exactly. I mean, obviously,. Ask the questions, as you said, that you don't really want to answer. Exactly. Anonymous. I mean, obviously, everyone wants to be like the best. Yeah. But you don't ask that question if you don't want to know the answer. Very true. Anonymous, very fascinating. Thank you so much for sharing this morning.

You're welcome. Shallow dive moments ago. Look into polyamory. The perspective of one person. Yes. Was polyamorous. Not recovering at all. Somebody text messages in.

What a crock. You don't have to understand. No, they're not hurting anybody. She's not here for your opinion. Yeah, she's not killing anybody. As far as we know. She might be into that as well. That would obviously be frowned upon.

That would be illegal. Nothing to do with polyamory. No, we at the show don't endorse murder. No. Never have. No. Somebody said it sounds like these people just have commitment issues. Why must we chuck judgment on it?

You know, like, just because you don't get it. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, we didn't ask judgment. We just wanted to chat and we had the open chat. And somebody said, I've been in a thruple for three months. Thruple's different again. It's a not traditional two-person relationship, but it's three parties in a relationship together

and we all sleep in the same bed every night. God, that would have to be a big bed. No way. A California king. Yeah, the biggest bed ever. Even still. And even then I'd probably ask someone to sleep sideways at the bottom a big bed. No way. A California king. Yeah, the biggest bed ever. Even still. And even then, I'd probably ask someone to sleep sideways at the bottom of the bed like a ghost.

Someone's always in the middle, right? So how do you go to the toilet in the middle of the night? You're in the middle. It's like the middle seat on a plane. It's just so inconvenient. I'd have to get the aisle for the wheeze. The aisle sleeper. For the three o'clock in the morning wheeze.

So we pivot from polyamory now to hot chips. Fantastic. Now a man has gone viral for his hack on how to get the hottest, freshest chips every time. Okay. And basically he is saying when you order chips at a fast food restaurant, you ask for no salt chips. And that way, you have to get a specially made batch before they salt them.

Because have you ever seen, they tip them into the big chip thing. Yeah, and then they salt them. Salt them and they flip them around. And then they use a little scoop to put them in the packets. Yeah. So he's saying, if you do that, you're going to get the hottest chips.

Inconvenience, everyone. He took you up. And that's the thing. It's like when you order a burger without something, like no gherkins or whatever, no sauce or extra whatever. It takes longer because they've got to make it. Fresh. Fresh and different, whereas they might just be making a batch

of the same burgers and you get them. Yes. But you'll be waiting. In either situation, hot chips or fresh burger,. But you'll be waiting in either situation. Yeah, you'll be waiting. Hot chips or fresh burger, you're going to be waiting. So he took a thermometer, one of those digital thermometers. So he got, he ordered some chips, just straight normal chips. And then he got his special chips with no salt.

The chips with no salt were 36.9 degrees. The chips that he got just regular salted were 24.3 degrees. Wow. Even what was the hot one? 36. That's not that hot. 36.9. But it can't be so hot.

It burns. Like sometimes you get chips in there and it burns your mouth. But I'd want my chips to be hotter than a spa pool. How hot's a spa pool? It's like 40 degrees. Yeah, 40's a pretty warm spa. But that's like warm water. It's still not super hot to the touch. Yeah, right. I'd expect

my chips up to, if not, 50 degrees Celsius. Oh, that seems very hot. Hot. It's as hot as water out of the tap. That's how hot I want my chips. So he's saying what you do is with the no salt chips, if you do want salt, you just get the little ask for salt and then put it on your side.

All right. You get a little salt sass to show. And then give it a thing. But yeah. But some people are a bit divided saying it might take too long and I don't know. Yeah. You're holding everybody else up.

I'm not, yeah. If you're cool with that. And then you might put too much salt on if you've got a little packet. Yeah. But also maybe in your car, because I'm imagining this is like a drive-thru takeaway situation, you could have one of those little Master Foods chicken salts.

And here's Do you have one of those in your car? No, no, not in our car, but we've got one in the spice drawer. In the glove box. No, it just says not in the car. Stop making people imagine in my family car, you pop open the glove box and there's just a spice rack. As soon as you said that though, I was like, get a chicken salt for the you pop open the glove box and there's just a spice rack.

As soon as you said that, though, I was like, get a chicken salt for the car, for the glove box. Chicken salt for the car. How good is a chicken? Because you could put it anywhere in the glove box. You could put it in the little door thing by the door. And the thing in the middle between the two front seats, what's that called?

The cup holder? Yeah. Or the console? Yeah. Or in the little pocket behind the driver's seat. You could just reach around for the chicken salt. Yes. And then you hang the chips out the window and you chicken salt them so that any that

falls off goes outside for, I don't know, the environment. Yeah. Don't tell me that the world is... Well, there's already salt in the sea. It doesn't matter if it's chicken flavor or not. Exactly. I would actually prefer the ocean if it was chicken flavored. You'd see me swimming a whole lot more.

Sharks would be more chill because they're swimming through flavor. They felt like they've eaten even though they haven't. It's been through the gills. Sharks are swimming through flavor. I just have a great old time. It's like the sea is now chicken stock. We just invented the greatest life hack of all, chicken salt for the car. Yeah.

Out the window on that chicken salt. Oh, my God. Master Food's need to get on board with this. Chicken salt for the car. Yeah. Out the window, on, back in, chicken salt. Oh, my God. Master Food's need to get on board with this. Get some influencers doing it. We need to invent a sort of a spice rack for the glove box. Yes. But what else would you have other than chicken salt? Like normal salt.

You could have some pepper. Okay, what else would we have in there? Maybe a lemon pepper. I'm thinking primarily it's for additional. Yeah, yeah, that's a great idea. Yes, yes. Because you've got to open up the burger and put we have in there? Maybe a lemon pepper. I'm thinking primarily it's for additional... Chili flakes? Yeah, yeah, that's a great idea. Yes, yes. Because you've got to open up the burger and put chili flakes in there. Yep, yep.

It's like hot sauce without having to have the hot sauce. Well, that's the other thing. Could you get a couple of bottles of mayo and hot sauce in there? And one of those little soy sauce dispenser thingies. Yeah, so a pump for soy sauce. Or you want that one with the red top and one's a little hole and one's a big hole, but you don't know which hole it is until you've already pulled it over your sushi and that's too much. Yeah, no, I think soy sauce could get messy in the car.

This is great because who uses the glove box really anyway? Apart from that manual. I haven't put gloves in there for years. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. We go now to the, what? You two, stop it. Mum and Dad are fighting. We've just had a disagreement about culinary.

We've had a culinary disagreement and it's spilling over into the show. Well, you're doing your word find and you're not paying attention to the show. I'm not paying attention to the show. I've been doing the word find. You had your feet up and then Flitch told you off. I definitely had my feet up. But you weren't ready for the break. You've got to relax into these things.

And then Vaughn wasn't ready. Well, to be fair, it was just a beat. I would have glazed over it. But you got impatient. Mum and Dad are fighting. I was giving it a dramatic pause for editing purposes later. We will stop the car, Megan, and you can walk home. I don't care what happens as long as I get ice cream.

You're not getting ice cream. If you've misbehaved enough to walk home, you're not getting ice cream. Ice cream's off the menu for a week after you've been trying to be better out of the car. Also, I feel we should touch on this just momentarily. We were talking about chicken seasoning for the glove box. Having a chicken salt. Some people message in hundreds and thousands would also go great in the glove box. Yeah.

Condiment section. For dessert. For dessert. For the ice cream. That's great because I'm imagining the rack that we're having made, there'll be room for a dessert. And a chocolate sauce. Yeah.

Stand by, we'll get this rack made. No, no, no, chocolate sauce. Nothing. No, you're attracting ants now. Okay. It's all dry. It's got to be dry. We can't have loose sauces rolling around the car.

You're getting told off from the producers now. We're running late. Okay, well, she wants to talk, so. Let's hear the story. Executive intern Anya, there was a whoopsie with Mr. Boon Boons. This is so great. Yes, on Friday night, so all week last week, my boyfriend had been talking about how he was going to organise date night on Friday.

Yep. And usually I am type A planner, control freak, have to plan everything. Well, because you've got the food Instagram account. Yep, Henny's Noms. Henny's Noms. And you're always posting, where's that fried chicken place you went to? That looked good. That was lovely, yeah.

That was really nice. Yeah. Kia, can you stop actually? Trigger me for some fried chicken. Yep. So for me to give up date night planning was quite a big deal but I relinquished my control freak ways so he was planning it all week and kept talking about I'm gonna book something nice we're looks so nice it's like okay all right all right yeah and on Friday still wouldn't tell me where we were going, told me to wear something nice. Oh, shit. Get dolled up.

Were you thinking, oh, my God, what if I get proposed to? Yeah, someone got a wobbly knee. It's lucky you didn't say anything because these two would have been on you. The proposal was imminent. Not my first rodeo. Oh, Megan, it was so obvious your now husband was going to propose in Rarotonga. Why else would you go to Rarotonga? For a holiday?

No, you two aren't Rarotonga holiday people. Oh my god. Okay, so the travel bubble I've said, I won't have a bad word said. I'm very much a Rarotonga holiday guy. You are, she's not. Complain about sand flies the whole time. John, you know me so well.

So we get in the car and we're driving around and he pulls into a car park and I still don't know where we're going and there's like several really nice restaurants around this area. Danny's. Valentine's. Sizzler.

So he walks me along the road and to one of my favourite spots, which is like quite a bit more expensive than we usually dine. And I was like, oh my God, this is great expensive than we usually dine. And I was like, oh, my God, this is great. Yeah. And we go inside and I'm like, oh, my God, you've nailed it. This is great. This is great. And he's pretty chuffed.

He's pretty pleased with himself. And we sit down and he starts saying all these really nice things. Oh, my God. Here it comes. Here it comes. Get out. And, yeah, talking about how, you know, proud he is proud he is and how much he loves me and all this stuff. Oh, my God.

And he's like, and so, you know, five years, like, I love you so much. And I was like. A happy anniversary. Yeah. Yeah, right. Thank you so much. You're actually eight days early. I've gone a little early, Eddie.

But, like, that's really lovely. Thank you so much. I would have, if I was him, been like, Eddie. But that's really lovely. Thank you so much. I would have, if I was him, been like, yeah, I know, but I couldn't get the booking in eight days. I would have saved that. Which is the following Saturday. Yeah, so he's like, cool. Hey, anniversary week begins now.

It's going to be a long one. A week-long extravaganza. Because you know it was on my fifth anniversary that I proposed. Okay, well, look, it's still a few days away. It's a great anniversary for a proposal. Yeah, yeah. You didn't, like, cut him off. Like, he wasn't headed down that road.

No, no, no, no, no. And I was really nice about it. What if he was about to? You bummed him out and he shied away from the proposal. Stop it. How quickly did you eat dessert? The ring might have been in your pudding. It wasn't.

We got trumpets from the servo. He did that thing. He put a ring. That's a classic. He unrapped the trumpet, fingered the ring in. Yeah. Put it back in the freezer at BP and then went in to buy it. Put the paper lid back on, folded it back down.

He's like, oh, my God, this is it. You were just like, how? Yeah. And now he's following you around with a sieve. Oh, my God. Oh, my Jesus. So we will not open up the phone lines this morning and ask, when did you get the date wrong?

When did you get the date wrong? Whether it was for an anniversary, a special event, or maybe you just went and booked flights for the completely wrong day and you turned up to the airport and you're like, oh no. That's my worst nightmare. That's what I'm saying. People do that. A lot of days in the year, a lot of the months sound the same.

I mean, what are June and July doing right next to each other? Days should be at opposite ends. They're both Js. Yeah, they're both Js. And then there's all the ones that end in er. Yeah. It starts again with August, September, and then all the way through to January.

They're all er's. You can see idiots getting mixed up all the time. August, September, October, November, December. Chuck some of them throughout the year a bit. So 0800-DARZATM, give us a call. When did you get the date wrong? Was it a special event, flights, whatever it was? How badly did you screw up the date?

Talking about when you've got the date wrong, Executive Intern Anya went out for a lovely romantic dinner at the weekend for her fifth anniversary, except it was eight days away. Eight days out. It's not as bad as this. What text message? My husband and I booked a romantic holiday to Araratonga for our 10th wedding anniversary. A month before we went, we

checked, we realised it was only our 9th wedding anniversary, so we were an entire year out. But you'd still go, wouldn't you? Yeah, yeah. Woody, when did you get the date wrong? Yeah, so I double booked work conference away from Auckland

and Queenstown on the same weekend I was getting married. You jerk. Dude. So what was it then? Work or wedding? Wow. Wedding, mate. It had to be wedding.

You sound a little hesitant there, though. I would have just taken her along and then when the conference happened, just get her to go see the sights. Yeah. And then use the conference room at the end of go, I don't know, go see the sights. Yeah. And then use the conference room at the end of the day. You've got a book for the whole day. You might as well.

Exactly. Get married there. Lots of text messages coming in. So many people getting dates wrong for some quite important event. Asking you when you got the date wrong this morning. The big anniversary,

five year celebrations for Executive Internania. Eight weeks early. Eight Eight weeks early Eight days early Eight days early Eight days Somebody messaged in I got the date wrong For the first day

Of my new job I had to awkwardly Sit in the empty desk For half an hour Until someone took pity on me Took me aside And told me to go home And come back on the right day

So better early than late Yeah Better early than late We threw my dad A 50th birthday party Shame was He was only turning 49. Never let us live that down.

Oh, my God. The year my brother and I moved out of home, neither of us wished mum a happy Mother's Day. She was sad and thought it was because we'd grown up and she wasn't important to us, but it turns out she was a week early, so she spent the Sunday moping, but it wasn't even Mother's Day yet.

Amy, when did you get the date wrong? So it wasn't, we weren't going on a date or anything, but my husband and I went to get matching tattoos, and he put the date we got engaged and the date we got married on his back. But when we were there getting it done, he was like, okay, are these dates actually right because they're going to be here forever? And I was like, yeah, yeah, no, you're good. And the date we got engaged is actually wrong.

It's a day out. But you're okay then. Roman numerals? No, no, no. It's in numbers. Oh, okay. And it should be the 30th, but it's the 31st. It's kind of hard to kind of make that one around.

Please tell me it's a month that doesn't have a 31st. No, it does have a 31st. It does. Yeah, right. Okay. I was doesn't have a 31st. No, it does have a 31st. Oh, it does. Yeah, right. Okay. I was just hoping like the 31st of April or maybe good stuff. So he's not going to get it changed. You're just going to go with the 31st then or the 30th?

Yeah, he's just going to go with it. He's just like, nah, it's the first full day we were engaged. And I was like, yeah, I mean, that's a stretch. I like it a lot. Yeah, that's good. Hey, Amy, thanks for your call. Sally, when did someone get the wrong date? Well, when Aladdin came to New Zealand, whenever it was, a couple of years ago,

I booked tickets for the whole family to go. $1,200. I bought tickets for the grannies for their birthday and then went to print the tickets out on the day and we'd missed it by a month. Oh, no. No, Sally. Did you see everyone posting about it and you're like,

man, we're not going for ages yet. Oh, yeah. I can't wait to go. It'll be amazing. Oh, babes. It was terrible. It was the granny's birthday present. How many people were in your party that you booked for?

Oh, six. So there's just this one right, there's just this row of six. Oh, no. How did your gran react when you told her? Oh, she was very good. But I just, it was just after Christmas. And I'd already told my husband off because he'd ordered some stuff online and got the address wrong and the things never arrived.

And I was like, you have wasted $40. Yes, that's good stuff. And he was very kind and he was quite silent. Brilliant, Sally. Thanks for your call. Some other dates that people got wrong. Family holiday to Noosa. We had our checkout date wrong.

Thought it was the day after. Returned from a day out. All of our bags were packed up behind reception because they needed the room. They packed our bags for us. Oh, no. What a great hack. Oh, no. What a great hack.

They'll do it all for you. That's why you use those apps like TripIt that are so good. Yeah. Because then it puts it all in an itinerary. And you can see, because I've done that and I misbooked something. And I was like, oh, I better fix that. Oh. Okay, nerd. I'm sorry,

it's a travel tip. But I don't need it now. They'll pack my bags for me if I'm wrong. I got my now boyfriend's birthday mixed up with my ex's birthday. That's great. Missed school cert exam by a day.

Just got the day wrong. Cut out a funeral notice from the paper, sent it in saying I had to go to my uncle's funeral. Is that not the best idea ever? Yeah. Surely they need more proof than that. Corrupt, but... Well, if you had a last name like yours, Smith,

there'd be a Smith dying every day. Oh, I often check. Yeah, sure. I often check if there's any Smiths part of this earthly coil. I trained for a half marathon, thought it was the Sunday marked on the calendar. Race weekend, I checked on the Saturday night what time I needed to be there

as it was a four-hour drive and didn't want to be late. Had all my stuff ready, checked it out. The run was actually on the Saturday, not the Sunday, so all the training had been for nothing. I put the wrong date on my daughter's birth certificate when I had to fill it out. Fill out the paperwork. Well there you go.

Mr Bun Buns, not alone there. Many people are making date mistakes. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan The Podcast. Fletch Warner Megan. Refund your date. Taylor, you've had a date and apparently it wasn't great.

And that's what this segment is all about. We hear about bad dates and then you tell us how much it cost you. We chuck all that information to the date refund of $6,000 and we could be refunding your date. So why don't you tell us about it? Okay, so it was probably like our thirding your date. So why don't you tell us about it? Okay, so it was probably like a, well, it would have been our third or fourth date. I'd met the guy down in Christchurch. Okay.

And it was coming up my 21st, and he's like, oh, I'll come up. And I was kind of thinking, oh, okay, you know, a bit serious. Wow, I know, because where are you? I'm in Nelson. Oh, right. Okay, right.

And that's a big deal, because the 21st is all the family as well. Yeah. And the rallies. Okay. Yeah, so we made an agreement. He'd sort himself coming up and I would pay for his accommodation because at the time I was still living at home.

Oh, mum and dad don't want no creepy stranger from Christchurch sleeping in the house. Exactly. And so that was fine. 21st came around and he came and it was all good. Like friends, family, like thought he was a really good guy. Night went on, we went into town and then all of a sudden like he disappeared and he texted, he said, oh, hey, like, you know, bit tired, not feeling it.

I'm going to go back to the hotel. I'll just see you later. Yeah. And I was like, okay, sweet as, not thinking much of it. And then I was like, oh, I'm tired too, I'll head back, get back to the hotel and find him in bed with my best friend. Okay, I had picked up that, had

probably, yeah, had probably picked up somebody, but your best friend? Yeah, it was, um, not, yeah, not the greatest of times. Wow, and you'd paid for that hotel room too? Yeah, I was pretty annoyed times. Wow, and you paid for that hotel room too. Yeah, I was pretty annoyed. I was just like, are you serious?

And with my best friend, like a random chick, okay, but my best friend. Yeah. Wow. Let's talk fallout then. Yeah, are you still best friends with her? No, God no. And so that was it, you never spoke to her again?

I basically just told her where she could stick it and left. I just got a taxi home. And did their relationship continue? No, apparently it was just a one-night thing. And yeah, they tried to blame it on the alcohol, but you know, you can't really. No. Oh, no, your best friend knows better than that.

Oh, that sucks. Yeah, exactly. Happy 21st. Oh, yeah. I know, but that's the other thing. Happy 21st. Oh, yeah. I know, that's the other thing, like your 21st is always soiled

with this memory too. Yeah, it's not really like the best, but you know. Wow, okay, so how much did you spend on the accommodation?

How much are you wanting to claim for? $200. $200? So that's the accommodation, is it? Yeah. Yeah.

Was that one night? Yeah, yeah. Well, accommodation in Nelson at last minute's not really. I know. It's a bit steep. All right, we'll feed that in to the... Your date refund request has been... It's been accepted.

Yeah. It's been accepted, yes. Thank you, date refund of $6,000. It always does accept it, doesn't it? So far. Yeah. Congratulations, yes. Thank you, date. Refunder, $6,000. It always does accept it, doesn't it? So far. Yeah. Congratulations, Taylor. Thank you.

$200. Unfortunately, we don't refund best friends. No, that's okay. It's not worth it anyway. Yeah. Fleshfauna Megan, the podcast, ZM. We know her as a villainess on Shorty Street. Carla, she is on the show, but Elizabeth Easter joins us in studio.

Good morning. Good morning. You're a ray of sunshine. You've come in with some great stories that aren't for airing right now. No, no, no, no, no, no. Not at all like the villain that you've played on TV. That's a good thing. I remember when you were on the first time,

it was the first story I read as, I must have been two at the time now, as a teenager, that people in New Zealand couldn't tell the difference between Shortland Street and reality. Like, there was a story about how people would yell at you in the street or... People yell at anyone on television on the street, though. I was talking to someone the other day and he just said,

no, it's that chopper fellow. And he says no one ever yells out of their cars, oh I like your work. They always usually yell out something dumb. So it's just the nature of people in the street. What would they yell out? Do you find they just like children's street?

Or like sing the theme song dun dun dun dun dun dun You're like okay cool. Humans are, yeah. But most of the people now who want to say anything um stupid they seem to do it online which doesn't really affect me i'm like the good old days in the 90s we had to scream it at somebody in the street from a moving vehicle i miss those days yeah the insults were so much shorter yeah and you only caught like the middle bit so you've come back to Shortland Street now as, again,

your character, a villain. A bad, bad person. She hasn't changed. I wanted her to be good. I really did. Because I remember you. You were the first murderer Shortland Street ever had. And I remember being so afraid of you.

And then like I was like, oh, my God, Carla's back on Shortland Street. She's going to cause shit. And you are. I know. I really did hope she was going to do a little bit of nice, gentle psychoanalysis with people. Put a few wrongs to right.

Maybe have something in the cafeteria that you can't eat because it's a prop. And home again. How did your character, how did you leave the street last time? Were you imprisoned or did you just disappear? Carla tried to kill her sister Robin and then she was, you know, what do you call it, put into a special place for people with troubles.

Yeah. And I don't think she was ever, like the story beyond her killing Bernie was never really taken any further. But I don't think she was had for murder because she was in extenuating circumstances possibly not of sound mind at the moment. But way back then

Chris Warner kind of fobbed you off. He was like, eh. And you've come back and you've had a crush on him. And now you're trying to burn him? Or murder him? Or leave him for dead? All of the above. Yeah. I know. Poor Chris. He's never asked for any of this.

He's been through a lot, hasn't he? His insurance premiums must be through the bloody roof as well. They wouldn't touch him. No, they just go, no, sorry, you're just going to have to save some money against the inevitable day when you need some sort of rehabilitation or skin grafts. Yeah.

But you've come back and, like, is this the final demise of Chris Warner? Oh, I hope not. But I only read up to the bit where, because I'm only interested in my bits. And so I just read my bits and I left the building. It was fully alight. And yeah. We'll see what happens. Sucks to be Chris.

Didn't have smoke alarms, did he? Another great advertisement. And this is a great, totally, yeah, yeah, yeah. And this is the time you want to check. Actually, funnily enough, mine went off at 4.49 this morning. There wasn't a fire. Why did it go off? I don't know. Did I hit one?

Oh, no, it was the full whoop, whoop, whoop. No, it wasn't just that I need a new battery. It was the there is a fire in your house. Oh, because I had that. So I had to, you know, do it. I had that once and it was dust. And it was like a cheap alarm. You had dust.

If you're doing Renaults, dust can. I dust conserved off. Oh, I'm going to give it a good old dust when I got home. What I did was, you know, I had to get a chair, stand on a table. Whack it with a tea towel? It's probably you guys getting up at about the same time. 4.49? That's the alarm.

Oh, it was you guys. It was your alarm. I often whack my alarm with a towel as well to stop, stop, not now. You should put the alarm further away from the bed. That's what... My wife would love that. Just ignore it. Yeah. roll over and go back to sleep oh you know you'd be the least popular husband in the bedroom so uh also um you're the voice

of woodacres the woodacres ad yes i am apart from that nigella came in you know yeah so nigella does all like the face she does all the face yeah because my face would frighten people into buying chocolate. Hello chocolate lovers. Yes. All that jazz. Oh yeah, okay. It's my favourite chocolate though, I have to say. It is so young. If you have to do a voiceover, that's the one you want to just like chomp, chomp, chomp,

chomp, chomp. So do you get lots of free, you must get answers all the time. No, usually no. In most voiceover worlds you don't. And with Whittaker's every now and then the lovely people who do the ads go, oh we've got a whole new dark one with the 98s and the high high and then

they sent me like a kilo and a half and arrived on the doorstep I nearly stubbed my toes oh my gosh what's this giant box of chocolate and my son and I we managed to demolish it and you know it didn't take long oh my god it was amazing if it's in the house it's public enemy number one but I love it

I actually believe in it's healing the house, it's public enemy number one. You've got to eat it. But I love it. I just, I have, yeah, I actually believe in its healing powers. That's why I'm so, you know. The cocoa. The high cocoa. Yeah, see, Fletch, I'm going to work with caramel and white chocolate.

I'd have it a go. What a wild career. You're a villain on TV and then you're like a seductive chocolate voice. Yeah, it's like, it's quite, you know, I have to figure out where I am when I go into things in the morning. Because imagine if I'd gone up to Chris Warner and said, hello chocolate voice. Yeah, it's like it's quite, you know, I have to figure out where I am when I go

into things in the morning. Because imagine if I'd gone up to Chris Warner and said, hello chocolate lover. Boom. Bit great way for him to go. I've seen it coming. Very sweet death.

Well, I very much look forward to see how you wreak havoc on Shortland Street. Thanks for joining us in studio, Elizabeth. Thank you very much. ZM's Fletch, Warner, Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day, us in studio, Elizabeth. Thank you very much. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about an alley in New York Okay A person or a street?

I would have said a bowling alley or a street Like an alley You mean an ally No, like a person named Allie Oh no, not an Allison of New York An alleyway An alleyway in New York Okay

Because despite what you think, New York does not have many alleys. When you picture New York, you always picture dodgy dealings going on in alleys, right? Alleyways and bits and pieces happening. Well, in actual fact,

there's bugger all alleys in New York. What are your classes in alley? Like a gap between two buildings? Yeah, with a road up it. Yeah, with a road up it. But that's a road if it goes all the way through. Well, if it goes all the way through, yes, that's true.

Or a service alley. There's one alley. It's in New York. It's called Courtland Alley. And it is the alley that you'll see in movies. Okay. It's the one alley that it's been in Smurfs. Gargamel is there

in the Smurfs movie. Crocodile Dundee there's a street fight in the same alley. In Gotham the TV show they used it to film where Bruce Wayne's parents are mugged and murdered. It's been also in other Batman franchises as well. Vampire Weekend, a band you like, they filmed a video

in that alley. It's the alley that scouts go to. What's it called? Have you got pictures of this alley? It's called the Courtland Alley. It's named after the Van Courtland family, who were the landowners. And

it is like a very stereotypical looking alley. Because I think if you think of like a place like Melbourne that's famous for its laneways and alleys. Tons of alleys. Tons of them. But so New York just doesn't, I guess real estate, like space is such a commodity. Spider-Man, the alley, Spider-Man's been basically in Ninja Turtles, any movie that was filmed in or around New York.

But then also that's misleading in movies because a lot of movies are actually filmed in, say, Toronto. Other places, exactly. Because that's a mini New York. That's exactly right. Often movies are set in New York and filmed in other places and they use multiple alleys, but then anyone who's a bit of a New York alley expert would know

that there's not that many alleys. So if you're watching a movie, it's got bit of a New York alley expert would know. Wow. That there's not that many alleys. So if you're watching a movie, it's got an alley in New York. It's either this alley or it's an alley in a different city. It's an alley in like Philadelphia. Apparently Philadelphia's got lots of alleys. People use, they film in Philadelphia or Boston and say it's a New York alley, but it's not. Wow. Okay.

And you can email bill at americanmovieco.com and ask for the Courant Alley film location in New York City. If you wish to film there, you will need to, of course, get a permit and book it out. And Bill can take care of all that for you. How much does it cost to book the alley? It doesn't say on there. Probably a lot of money.

Yeah. So if you just hung around that alley for a bit, you'd see some filming probably. Yeah, definitely. If you walk past all the time, you definitely will. So apparently on the alley there's a tiny museum, a ping pong training centre, gambling hangouts

and luxury apartments. A ping pong training centre? Yeah. Okay. That sounds like a cover up for something but it's definitely not. It really does sound like something dodgy. Yeah. So today's fact of the day is New York doesn't actually have many alleys at all.

So if you've seen a movie filmed in New York like Men in Black, Ninja Turtles, Highlander, Gotham, Kate and Leopold, Boardwalk Empire, Nine and a Half Weeks, Law and Order, NYPD and The Smurfs, including many others, they were all filmed in one alley. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. So this happened at the weekend, Saturday. Vaughan and I came back from our, you may remember we mentioned that we did a corporate speaking event. We did our motivational talk. Was it inspirational? Let's just say the company is flush with cash after that.

Yeah, right. We got a message from the CEO. Huge influx of advertisers. Yeah, we got a thank you for our motivational speech. He said motivational. the CEO. Huge influx of advertisers. Thank you for our motivational speech. Motivational. If you've ever considered advertising on the radio, tough. No space left. Vaughan created this immense

demand. I need to see this text from Foxy. I created a false shortage of supply which creates a demand. Well, this is what you do when you're motivational speaker. This is what you do. It's marketing 101.

Come in hot with a really like full on attitude and a great amount of positivity and then just huck a whole lot of buzzwords in there, baby. You're a marketing genius.

So we landed at the airport on Saturday fresh off the back of this absolute motivational speech. It was a private jet, wasn't it? With Air New airport on Saturday, fresh off the back of this absolute motivational speech. It was a private jet, wasn't it? With Air New Zealand on it, yeah. And another 150. We gave a whole lot of people a ride back in our private jet.

You had guests. Yeah, a few. And anyway, so Warren, you were getting picked up because you were off to the Hamilton for the weekend. So your wife picked you up. Yes. And I was there waiting for the bags, and I was all ready to Uber home.

Yeah. On the company Uber because that's a thing now apparently. That's going to be dangerous when I get drunk and I don't switch it back from business to personal. They'll come for you. Oopsie. Oopsie.

And you can get Uber Eats on that account too. Can you? Well, I remember Ross marching around the office demanding to see everybody's weekend plans. Who had this pad thai? And everybody's silent. So anyway, and then we run into our friend James, who's at the airport. And he's actually heading back into the city.

So I said, oh, well, let's grab lunch. And I will save the company $45 to $50. So anybody keeping tally, we made the company a whole lot of money and then we saved the company even more money by getting our own way home from the business trip. Well, no, actually, I am today, I'm taking the equivalent of what that Uber would have cost the company at home in stationary, A4 reams of paper.

And that's fine. Yeah. Because they would have already spent that money. Yes. So it's just even now. Okay. So anyway, just even now. Okay. So anyway, I was like, well, let's grab lunch. And so I got the ride and park bus with Jay because he did the park and ride.

Okay, yeah. It's like five minutes drive away from the airport, that big parking lot. And so we're going in the bus, we get there. And then he's like, I'm just parked over here. So I'm like, cool. And he's got a blue Suzuki Swift. Oh shit. Easy to spot. Easy to spot. No.

When there's not another 10 of them, he's lost his car in the car park. He's like, it's just over here. We get there and there's no blue anything. And we end up wandering around the car park for 10 minutes before it's on the other side. The trouble is that car park, there's no like...

Well, no, they have letters. Oh, do they? So they have letters. And I said, oh, well, maybe next time you should take a photo of where you park. Or I think, is it Google Maps have a function you can drop a pin? Or locate your parked car. Or Android. I think Android have a feature, yeah, it just knows that you've parked your car.

So it just drops a pin anyway. Yeah. But yeah, I found six other blue Suzuki Swifts before his, including the new sport model, which I said, you've got to upgrade. This is really nice. What does the new sport model have? What? And it just looks sportier.

Well, it definitely looks faster. And extra gear. So we end up finding it, and that was like 10 minutes. It's lucky. I was like, who loses their car? It's so lucky that he was with you of all people because you're known for your patience. Oh, known for my patience. Yeah, I definitely wasn't huffy at all.

And I was like, God, I could have been home by now. By now, if I'd taken the email, I was literally thinking. Yeah. But I had, so I can't get too mad because I did do this. But in my defense, it was at Six Flags in California. Oh, with thousands of cars. In the gigantic car park. I lost a rental car and all I remember is that it was white.

And they all are. And they're all white. And I just was walking around the car park for like 15 minutes with the beeper just looking for flashing taillights. And that's what I wanted to ask this morning. Has anybody else ever lost their car? I lost my car in Kmart only a couple of weeks ago. Well, I say Kmart, but it's a mall car park.

And I was honestly walking around for 20 minutes and I could not remember where the car was. Because were you remembering where you parked it another time? Yeah. I think so. Because I generally always park in the same area because it's got a sheltered bit, so if it rains, I'm covered. Yeah, right and but i went

back to that area my car i was like i've definitely been towed but then i didn't know if they tow from there and i was ready to call for help and get a taxi home because i thought my car had been stolen but no it was just a couple of but that would be the best one as well if you can't just had straight up been stolen but you just thought you couldn't remember where you parked you went around for like hours looking for it you're like oh it has been stolen or like you think it up been stolen, but you just thought you couldn't remember where you parked it. Yeah. You went around for like hours looking for it, and you're like, oh, it has been stolen. Or, like, you think it's been stolen, but you just can't remember where you parked it, and you just go through the whole, like, a police complaint, file with insurance, and then, like, Westfield ring you and say, hey, are you going to move your car?

Yeah, it's been here for three weeks. Because usually if I lose my car, it's got that thing where I push the key down, and it goes, ha, ha. Oh, the panic button. And it tells me where it is. Okay, so I just want to take some calls. Has anybody else done this? Has anybody lost their car?

And for how long? Because you just couldn't remember where you parked it. When have you lost your car? I was with my friend James at the week where we lost his Suzuki for about 10 minutes at the park and ride. Found five other blue Suzuki Swiss. In all fairness, that is a giant car park, and it's not even like full as it was pre-COVID levels, because pre-COVID, that car park was like eight rugby fields big.

Yeah. And now it's like maybe not even an eighth of that, but still easy to lose a car in. And lots of messages coming through. A friend drove to a night out, parked up the car. We got on it. Next morning he thought he'd lost his car. He found it a few months later parked at the local swimming pool

car park. And they called him and said, your car's here. And he's like, that's right. But had he reported it stolen? I don't know. Maybe if he got the call, maybe he reported it stolen. So many people are doing this at the mall,

saying they're in a hurry when they get to the mall, so they park and they don't pay perfect attention as to where they've parked. Yeah. And they report their car stolen only to find it on another level of the car parking. The Sky City car park goes down, what, 10 levels. But. They've got colours. And you can pull a little tag.

It tells you where you are. Yeah. That's handy. I always take a photo little tag. It tells you where you are. Yeah. That's handy. I always take a photo of like the pole with the number. Yeah, yeah. And the colour. The surroundings. My workmates moved my car as a joke one day.

I couldn't find it. I eventually found it ages later. Then a month later, I went to the car park and couldn't find my car. And I went back in and I was like, it was funny the first time. This is not funny. And they were like, it wasn't us. And there was a big argument. Turns out a man had broken out of prison and had stolen my car as a getaway car.

Yeah. And it wasn't them that had moved it after all. Oh, wow. So I hadn't lost it. It had been stolen. But now talking about when you have lost your car, maybe it was for 10 minutes like the other day or maybe longer at the mall.

It was for a long time. I had to take my partner to Auckland City Hospital in the middle of the night. Emergency. So next day after being there for 10 hours, little baby. We had our baby walking up and down all the car park levels crying because we thought our car had been lost and or stolen. Turns out there's two car parks. Oh, yeah, there is.

One beside and one behind. Yeah. Yep. Very similar looking when you arrive in the delirious state of trying to get your pregnant partner into an emergency room, I bet. Massive car parks overseas. People are like, here in New Zealand, you take it for granted that they're not that massive, and then you get to, like,

the massive car parks at the malls in Australia. Oh, yeah. It's multi-level, and each one's the size of, like, multiple football fields. Like the Dream World or the Wet and Wild car parks, they're massive. Double that up with the fact that all rental cars

look the same. Yeah. Yes, that too. Donna, this was a family member that was renowned for losing the car. It's my grandfather. When he was about 75,

he used to go to the stock car racing each time it was on. Yeah. And he'd take a thermos flask stock car racing each time it was on. Yeah. And he'd take a thermos flask with him so that when it was finished, he'd sit and have a cup of tea and wait till all the cars went so he could find what his was. Oh, my God.

Rather than remembering, he just prepared to forget. That's actually quite genius, but that means if you went to the mall, you'd have to be going literally an hour before closing. It wouldn't work the same. And then you've got the people that go to the movies, so they'd make it hard to find your car as well. But otherwise, not a bad tip. Donna, thank you.

April, when did you lose your car? It was a few years ago now, but on the day I just lost my job. So I was asked to leave work early. And when I got back to the park and ride where I parked my car, I couldn't find it. Turned out it got stolen. But I couldn't call my mum because I was supposed to be at work. And you know in movies when they're like, oh, things couldn't get worse and then it starts raining?

And then the narrator says, things got worse. They did April, thanks for your call. Some other text messages in it. Somebody said, I feel like I'm part of the reason Sky City introduced that paper tag system. Many years ago I was lost in there with a friend for over an hour

looking for the car. We just had pedicures at the spa, so we were wearing foam jandals. The security guard came and spoke to us and gave us a ride around the car park while we looked for our number plate. That's cool. But it took a long, long time. It turned out we were a few rows away, also the wrong level. So, yeah, maybe we're the reason they bought in the paper tag system. Which is great if you were the reason. That's fantastic.

Somebody messaged you this when my granddad used to do it. When he used to go to the stockyard for stock sales on the Friday, he wouldn't remember where he'd parked. He'd just prepare for the fact he knew he'd forget. How gold is that?

But he also misses traffic too. Just sit and wait. Sit and have a cup of tea. Yeah. Probably see some things. My granddad used to love just parking his car also misses traffic too. Yeah. Just sit and wait. Sit and have a cup of tea. Yeah. Probably see some things. Do some wank around. I used to love just parking his car and just watching things. Yeah.

Just having a bit of a watch. I can see myself turning into that man to be totally honest. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's free and clean to listen to? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hit music. Live here.

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