ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 1st April 2021

Episode Date: March 31, 2021

The Last United Video  Top 6: 2 Million  Jared's Easter Egg Hunt  Bakery of the Day!  Morgan Penn: Sexologist  LONG WEEKEND GROUP TOOT!!!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Buy five McCafe coffees, get one free on the Maccas app. And for those listeners listening now to the podcast overseas, there will be no Friday podcast. Yeah, but they're overseas. Easter's not just New Zealand. Well, yeah, I know, but I'm just saying people might not know.

There'll be no Monday podcast as well, but we'll be back with Tuesdays. What countries don't celebrate Easter? I'm imagining the non-Christian ones. You've got your eyebrows sort of hooked up. I know. I've turned my hat backwards and I've pulled it up and it's given me a facelift. Yeah, but it's caused absolute chaos in the middle here. Yeah, and the gap there and the wrinkly forehead.

I look like a pug or something. Who doesn't celebrate Easter? I mean, well, non-Christian companies and countries, right? Are there like atheists? Oh, there are many countries that don't celebrate Easter. This is on Quora. Now that I've also Googled this, I'm going to get an email from Quora today. Do you ever sign up to Quora?

No. Questions. But the minute you Google something, they'll send you a couple of emails the day after with any updates on it. Like when you Google search anything and then you get targeted ads for it. Oh, my gosh. So what podcast listeners will just be rolling through? Most but not all Muslim countries don't

observe Easter as a national holiday, with important exceptions. The biggest Muslim nation run by population Indonesia as well as Malaysia have Good Friday as a national holiday. As does Singapore with its Buddhist plurality. I would like to see a map of where everybody downloads the podcast from.

Do we have those kind of statistics? I don't know. But that's a good thing about a digital download is surely it's got a trace. Absolutely wrapped in statistics. What can people listen to on Friday and Monday instead? Just nothing. Just wait. Just wait.

Just sit Sit in silence Catholic Catholic hymns Sure Yeah Yeah maybe Alright Well have a fantastic

Long Easter weekend Miss you Or don't You'll don't But preferably do Yeah Try I'm going to

But I don't really care If you don't Oh rough ZM And music Lives here Fleece Vaughan and Megan The podcast Good morning Welcome Lives here. Fletchvaughn and Megan. The podcast.

Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletchvaughn and Megan with Hayley Sproul. Happy long weekend, Eve. Uh-huh. Yeah. Happy April Fool's. Oh, yeah.

Pinch and a punch for the first of the month. Subway. Oh, bless them. Someone took their shot, but they're 12 hours early. Oh, maybe they'd put like a timer on it, but they'd gotten it wrong, you know, like a scheduled post. The coriander, the new coriander-flavoured cookie. Yeah. I just rolled my eyes and I thought, oh, you've gone early.

But people were lapping it up, though, weren't they? Oh, they were. Because I always tag my friend, you know, Nay, he doesn't like coriander. Every time I see something, I always tag him in. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah, but I was going to tag him in, but know, he doesn't like coriander. Every time I see something, I always tag him in. Oh, really? Yeah, but I was going to tag him in, but I didn't want to give them any insights.

I'm too cynical, eh? I'm like, I see what you're doing here. No. But that's what I said when Shadana and I were talking about it. I said, they're going to get more exposure going early than they would have

just amongst the mix of April Fool's Days today. Yeah, I reckon that's why they went early. Go hard and go early. Well, imagine if it's not and they actually release that cookie today and then jokes on us. Yeah, it could be a double joke. Jokes on them again because no one's going to buy that shit. Even I love coriander.

I'm not eating a biscuit with coriander. Oh, yuck. No. All right, coming up on the show tonight, 7 o'clock and 8, Zed Empty Tank. Chance for you to win fuel ahead of the long weekend. And then it returns, 8 o'clock, the long weekend group two. This will be your second.

I don't know how my heart is going to make it through today. I get so fizzed about these things. Love giving away a bit of money that's not mine personally. And love the long weekend group two. What's not to love? This is my second one. And the the Long Weekend Group too. What's not to love? Loved it. This is my second one. And the first one, I was screaming.

So join us from 8 o'clock this morning on the road with your horn and get ready for all the excitement of the Long Weekend Group too. Coming up on the show before 7 this morning, we're going to do a special Bakery of the Day Hot Cross Bun Edition. Yeah, if your bakery has a rich, spicy, glazed, delicious, sticky hot cross bun that you would like to promote, they'll probably sell out regardless today, but give them the props where they're due. It's a special Easter bun.

All right, that's coming up before seven. The top six on the way. Great news for things like the Long Weekend Group too because it means more people on the way. Great news for things like the Long Weekend Group too because it means more people on the road as Auckland's population is projected to hit 2 million within 10 years. That's crazy. 2 million Aucklanders. Wow.

Which is bananas. Lucky we've got enough houses. So many houses. So many empty houses. Just waiting for people to buy them at a reasonable price. Plenty. Yeah. Ghost towns. So many.

Everywhere. Yeah, we'll be able to fill up those houses. But with 2 million people in Auckland, that increases our odds of some unusual things happening. Okay. We've got the top six things that will happen to people in Auckland statistically

when the population hits 2 million. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. I know. Wrong page. I shut statistically when the population hits 2 million. I know, wrong page. I shut down the page with a story about the lime scooter on it because Jared sent me a Reddit thread on anyone ever trying to straighten their pubic hair with a hair straightener. Oh my gosh. I feel like it's more exciting.

It would have to be. So small, the straightener. There are mini straighteners though. Yes, there are for short-haired people. Because I remember when I had a long beard, I used the mini straightener to straighten it and I was so pleased with it. Wow.

It really gave it length and it looks funny having a straight beard. Yeah, right. But this is from a while ago. This person may have recovered, but somebody did burn themselves quite badly because this all just triggered a whole lot of other people trying it.

Yeah, right. And I'm guessing it was standard sized. Like a GHD. Yeah, like a GHD on an average length pubic hair. Well, that close next to any genitalia with a hot hair straightener is a bad idea. Yeah, it does feel immediately wrong, doesn't it? Yeah.

Do you want to still talk about the lime scooter lady? I'm back with her now. I think so. Yeah, that was the plan. I think that it? Yeah. Do you want to still talk about the lime scooter lady? I'm back with her now. I think so. Yeah, that was the plan. I think that's the end of that riff, to be honest. Just be careful out there. I'm not telling you not to do it. It's your life.

Do what you want. But I will say, proceed with caution. What about if your pubes are long enough to straighten, why don't you just sort of braid them? Braid them out of the way, one each side. Rows, you know. Trim. Let's get a trim.

Cultural appropriation. Yeah. A lady has won a court case that has been going on since June 2019. Oof. Involving her, a lime scooter, and the person on the lime scooter that crashed into her. She's been awarded $4,000. She took him to court Yes

Or the No she took the Like it was a civil matter Person driving it to court Well she ended up With serious industry Uh industry Serious injuries

She was concussed Yep Um And hurt And bruised And she's kind of Concussed So where did it hit her

Did she hit the ground She hit the ground Right Was she the one that got off the bus and the guy was just like, whoosh, yes, and just took her out? She said,

we don't look as we get off the bus. We're watching our step and took a step and that was all she can remember. Right. And she got hit by it. So this is a lawsuit that's been going for nearly two years

and she just got awarded how much? $4,000. You know, like was it worth it? That's stubborn. Lawyers wouldn't be getting out of bed for that, would they? Would he, the guy on the lime scooter that crashed into her, would he have to pay her court charges as well, her court fees? Oh, yeah, that happens sometimes, but I don't know.

But if he doesn't, like, that's some stubborn shit, right? Like, you're spending more than $4,000 on lawyers. I'm sorry. It's for the moral credit. Yeah. Like, even when you buy a house, what's that? Like, you're spending more than $4,000 on lawyers. I'm sorry. For the moral credit. Yeah. Like, even when you buy a house, what's that? Like, nearly two grand in legal fees? Oh, I was like, no, my house was a little bit more expensive

than two grand. No, but the legal fees. You're thinking of a caravan. And that's like, what, half an hour's work for the law? All they do is receive the docs. Yeah, look over the docs. Look through for any words that sort that set off any alarm bells. And that's anywhere between $14,000 and $2,000.

You'd hope her legal fees were covered somehow. Otherwise, the math doesn't work out. No. But also, like, ACC takes care of your injuries, right? Like, you've really got to. You've really got a bone here, right? She obviously didn't do anything wrong. Like she said, that you do when you're getting off the bus,

you're looking at your feet, not your side. But that person also didn't intend to take someone out in such a bad way. No. What are they charged with? Operating a lime scooter. Do they get a criminal record? I don't know. I don't know. Well, operating a vehicle in a lime scooter. Do they get a criminal record? I don't know. Well, operating a vehicle in a dangerous

way. But they even class that as a vehicle? Well, they go pretty fast. An e-scooter? She defended her decision not to look left or right before stepping off the bus because she never has. Oh, that's fair. How often do you look left or right when hopping up? When was the last time you caught a bus? A public bus?

I can't remember. I know I have been on one. Would you have looked left and right? Yeah, because I think as part of my, yes. Yeah. Just thinking about how I get off a bus. No, I'm usually, I'll have my AT card, you know, my snapper or whatever you want to call it. Yeah.

Your card. So you'd boop thepper or whatever you want to call it. Yeah. Your card. So you'd boop the machine on the way out, doors open, and then I'm putting it back in my wallet. I'm head down. As, yeah, right. Okay. Okay, not holding on to that. So I'm also getting knocked out by the-

I was just thinking buses. I've been on that park and ride bus. Yeah. The airport one. The airport one. Yeah. I always look when I get off that. Okay.

So you grab your bags, don't you? You kind of like look whether or not you're going to step out and bang into somebody. So I assume that's look when I get off that. So you grab your bags, don't you? You kind of like look whether or not you're going to step out and bang into somebody. So I assume that's how I also get off an ordinary bus. Has the person recovered from their injuries? Yes. I believe so. Which doesn't say I haven't heard anything. Well, the courts will be happy

that this one's not taking up their time anymore. Yeah. Alright, 14 past 6. Next on the show, it's the end of an era. Christchurch people are probably feeling it today. It's going to be a sad day down there. We're saying goodbye to one of the very last DVD hire shops. I'm going to try to get through this one without crying.

Okay, well, you are trained in crying. Oh, yeah, we can go there again. Yeah, okay. An article came to my attention, sorry. An article came to my attention yesterday that in Christchurch there is one remaining

DVD rental store. United Video. It is the last of the DVD rental stores in Christchurch. It. United Video. It is the last of the DVD rental stores in Christchurch. It is United Video New Bright. Oops. I didn't pause that part before I...

Whoa! Play it one more time now. United Video. Whoa! Entertainment, what a show! Entertainment, what a show. Entertainment, what a show. Wow, when is that ad from? That is, well, Hunt for Red October, the Sean Connery submarine film,

is the new release, I'm guessing like 91? Yeah, a while back. How has this managed to hang on for so long? They say that they were serving their community. They wanted to stay open for as long as they could. It is not, they're saying it's not the fact that Netflix and Disney and HBO and all that kind of stuff are so popular now.

They're blaming COVID-19 in terms of new releases aren't coming out so much. Right, the stores that have remained have been in smaller towns, places with no internet, rural people or old people. Old neighbourhoods. Old neighbourhoods.

Yeah, for sure. They're one of the last in the country. And on April 20th, I believe, at the end of April, after 20 years of serving their local community with cheap entertainment weekend treats and remember the little treats

tangy fruits yeah there was always many a snack by the check out so that when they were they were doing that thing where they scanned the bottom of the

the video or the DVD case to turn off that little magnet thing that when you walked out if you were trying to pinch it oh yeah that's right

yeah the magnet thing and the DVD was never in the were trying to pinch it. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah, the magnet thing. And the DVD was never in the case. The DVD wasn't in the case, but the video was because they could store the DVDs in super thin paper slips in those drawers behind them, but the videos were too thick,

so the videos had to live in the case. That's right. Remember that? Yes, and they had the machine to rewind them. Yep, the dedicated VHS rewind machine. You didn't rewind it. Sometimes that was a fine a hell to pay.

That'd be put on your account. The owner of it said that the plan was they were going to stay open until they didn't make a damn dollar. Wow. Oh, wow. Okay. Then said they haven't pulled a profit

from the company for some time now, but we stayed there for the community. I think it's going to be very sad for them. Is that the last one in the country? Any kind of DVD store? No. I think there's a couple of indie kind of cool hip ones in Wellington still.

Yeah, probably a few small towns but there's certainly not many. Wow. There are nine United Video stores left in New Zealand, down from over 100. And the 1980s and 1990s, early 2000s version of going into incognito mode was sneaking behind the curtain

to have a look at the adult content. Yes. That's actually, Executive Internania, that's one of your biggest life regrets, isn't it? I never got to the porn section. Because you would have been of the age where you always went with parents or like an adult that you were.

Yep. You couldn't sneak in there. Yep, I was probably 12 the last time we went in. Right, to a DVD store. Just probably in my prime, ready to investigate these things. I remember flatting in Hamilton when there was like one of the big DVD stores

was still open and my old flatmate Siz, he used to, he had a rule, the rule of three when you went to the video store. Okay. New release. Yeah. He always wanted a new release. He wanted like a classic 80s blockbuster. Yeah, love that.

Like a Die Hard or like a, you know, even like a Ghostbusters and Indiana Jones, like a classic. Yeah. And some soft erotica. He never went full hard erotica. He never went full hard erotica. He was always the soft erotica. And they always had some really interesting options in that way. I actually, this has just come back, flooding back to me.

One of the most embarrassing moments of my life, awkward moments of my life, when I accidentally watched porn with my dad. So in Wellington. Oh my God, I was halfway there drinking. In Wellington, there was a United video

on Taranaki Street and it had a very amazing indie section and that was me. I was at drama school at the time. Right. I first year drama school.

I lived in this flat and I used to always go there and get the indie films because I was an actor and I like trying to work out what kind of work I want to do. Yeah. And I went there with my dad. So my dad lives in the Wairarapa

and he used to come and stay at my flat when he wanted to work late. And we were like, let's get some movies and a pie and we'll sit down and watch a movie. And then we saw Flash Gordon, which was one of my family's favourite films of all time. Legendary sci-fi space adventure, Flash Gordon. We're huge Queen fans in my family, so we got this DVD.

I was like, oh, my God, we're going to watch Flash Gordon tonight. Sit down, the movie starts. And I was like, it's sort of different to how I remember it. But, you know, we'll go with it. It's been many years since I've seen it. Then they started getting it on. What did you get? The porn parody of Flesh Gordon.

I got Flesh Gordon. Oh no. And there. Did you watch it though? I mean you'd I mean you started. You started. We tapped out.

And reports coming in on the text machine Morrinsville my hometown still got a thriving United video. Oh yes. Good on you Morrinsville.

I don't know if we had the adults only section. It was owned by Christians at one stage. Oh, okay. They got rid of all the adult content. Putting the Lord ahead of prophets there. They might have a flesh Gordon. It wasn't too hardcore. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. ZM. From the panoramic ZM think Tank, this is the Top 6. Hello there. Today's Top 6 is projected statistics saying that within the next 10 years, Auckland's population will hit 2 million. So it's at 1.5-ish. At the moment.

So you think about that, that's a third of the population. Yep. Being added to the total within 10 years, but it's taken 150 years to get to where it is. Crazy. Where are they going to fit? Up. Up.

Up. Yeah. We've got to go up. But we're going out and up. But we are going up. And even the people who are out, they're going up.

Yeah, right. If you're out, you're up. It's a story of New Zealanders. But if you're out, you're up. Well, I lived in a cul-de-sac and two apartments, like a tiny cul-de-sac with 12 houses, two apartment buildings went up. It's a story of New Zealand, isn't it? But if you're going out, yeah. Well, I lived in a cul-de-sac, like a tiny cul-de-sac with 12 houses. Two apartment buildings went up. Yeah, that's happening.

Is this where we put apartments now? Yeah. Oh, a bit of a NIMBY attitude there. Not in my backyard. Not in my backyard. Build them in someone else's street, but not mine. It's all right. I've moved now.

So disgusting to you, you moved. Yeah. To another area that could happen to it. It wasn't the eyesore factor, it was more, where am I going to park my car? Right, yeah. Well, that's the thing, you've got to think about the amenities, don't you? We're already, like this summer, there was a water shortage.

Looking forward, there's got to be solutions to these sorts of things. Public transport, etc. Schools, hospitals. I'm going to stop showering. That's not going to, I don't believe I'm going to stop showering that's not going to I don't believe I'm going to stop showering and I don't believe

you need to drink as much water as we're being told I'm going to drink a cup a day yeah see how that goes and stop showering

so you won't sweat because you don't have the water yeah well with 2 million people living in Auckland that means statistically a lot more long odds are likely to happen

yeah and these are the top 6 things that are more likely to happen with a population of 2 million. Number six on the list. We'll have three Olympic gold medalists. Now, I googled, and the chance of winning a gold medal is one in 662,000. See, that makes it sound like anyone has a chance. No, doesn't it? What do you mean?

One in six? Because in athletes? You divide the medals by the population. Yeah. Right. So I might win it just by chance, not even being an athlete. Well, that's how you're making it sound. You are 68 times more likely to randomly win a gold medal than you are to win a long shot lottery. Wow.

To just be like, I might give long jump a go. And then you run and it turns out you clear the whole sandpit and you're half kangaroo, but you didn't know. But that's more likely than you winning a long shot lottery. Because I don't know how long I can jump. Exactly. You might be a really good skeet shooter. Like, how would you. Because I don't know how long I can jump. Exactly. I know how high I can jump. You might be a really good skeet shooter. Like, how would you know?

I don't know. I haven't put my hand to it. So we would have three Olympic gold medalists. Wow. Statistically speaking. As long as the rest of the world didn't grow as quickly. Yeah. Because then I'm guessing the numbers go down

because they're not increasing the amount of gold medals. Number five on the list of the top six Aucklanders that will exist. Yeah. If the population of gold medals. Number five on the list of the top six Aucklanders that will exist if the population rates 2 million. Auckland would have two people who could toss a coin 20 times in a row and get heads every time. Because the chance of that happening will be one in a million. Oh, right. Wow.

If you set out, same with tails, but you have to pick one at the start and say, I'm going to do this 20 times in a row. The chance of that happening will be one in a million. There's a mathematical equation for that, but it's to pick one at the start and say, I'm going to do this 20 times in a row. The chances of that happening are one in a million. There's a mathematical equation for that, but it's got a little arrow on it. I'm lost. No one knows what that means. I'm lost. That means two people would be able to do it in a population of two million.

Okay. Number three on the list of the top six people that will live in Auckland, given statistically more likely to live in Auckland if the population hits two million, two people who will be killed by flesh-eating bacteria. Oh, I hope that's not me. Shotgun not. No, but you might get it from the sandpit you're jumping in for long jump training.

Oh, yeah. It might have been like a cat went poos in there on top of a dog poos. Yeah, and then I get in there and graze my shin or something. It's in. Yeah, and it gets in that way. It will be me. There goes your Olympic dream.

Tim, it only just begun. I know. But you've got it in the leg, It will be me. There goes your Olympic dream. Tim, it only just begun. I know. But you got it in the leg, the kangaroo legs. Sorry to hear it. Thank you, guys. Will you visit me?

No. I don't want to get the bug. Like when you're all cleaned up. I'll wave at you through the window. Okay, thanks. I'll spray aggressively with a death hole

by spray before I approach. Yeah. Number three on the list of the top six people that will live in Auckland, statistically speaking, if the population hits two million, a person who would get struck by lightning in their life. Oh, yeah.

About one in two million chance of being struck by lightning. So one person. One person will get struck by lightning. Number two on the list of the top six people that will live in Auckland, statistically speaking, if the population hits two million, someone who could actually make homebrew beer that tastes good.

Not just tastes good because you put all the effort in so you have to believe it tastes good, but other people will actually unbiasedly tell you it tastes good. The odds of that low. Almost zero. And number one on the list of the top six people who will exist in Auckland, statistically speaking, if the population hits two million,

there will be one person who can drive. Right, okay. I agree with that one. I'm talking indicating. I'm talking conscientious merging. I'm talking sticking to the speed limit. Keeping a calm, cool head. Yep.

Not swerving, not swearing, not panicking, keeping concentrated. It's a long shot, but I believe they may exist. That's today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. This is a little Easter story of romance old and romance new. Yeah.

Producer Jared, first Easter with the Middy. Wow. And he was really, you know, behind the scenes, really wanted to crowbar in the fact that he's a big old romantic. He said a few times, I've got something we could talk about today, guys.

We could talk about my Easter egg hunt. Yeah, he brought it up numerous times in Brett this morning. Guys, you should tell everybody how great I am I've got an Easter egg hunt. We ignored him the first few times, but then we needed to fill this gap right now. And here we are. And here we are. Here we go. And you are doing something romantic this weekend.

Something cute AF. Okay. I am setting up a Easter egg hunt for the midi. Yeah, right. And what are you going to do? Just hide them around the home? Yeah, around the garden, in the house. I'm going to print out little clues,

and then I'm going to stain it with tea, and then I'm going to burn the edges. Oh, like a treasure map? Like a pirate map. Yep. And then, Emma, if you're listening, turn the radio off. I've got this massive Easter bunny. It's like this big.

Oh, wow. Who made it? The warehouse. Yeah, but is it one of those shit Australian chocolate ones? Because you know how Australia can't make decent chocolate? Yeah, you've got to see where that was made. You've got to go to a trusted vendor. A chocolatier, your Whitakers, your Lindt. Oh, no.

Your Lindt. You better have a smaller Lindt bunny than a big rubbish one. Do you know what I'm saying? Well, I've got her a massive rubbish bunny and I've got one or two small Lindint bunnies to garnish the big bunnies. That's enough, because she'll fill herself up on the small ones. The big one's just sort of a novelty. You always use that in cooking as well.

It's probably carob. I'm really excited about it. How many clues? I've got about 15 clues. Fifteen? I've got heaps. And is there going to be an egg at each stop? Maybe. There might be like one large collection of eggs

at the end of the tritium. Yeah, because I want to, like while she's looking in this spot, I'm going to backtrack and go to a spot she's already been and replant more eggs. You don't want to hide the eggs too early because of ants. Yeah.

That could ruin the romance if you're chocolate. And neighbourhood dogs and stuff. Yeah, teaming with ants. Yeah. But it was during this excessive chat about Jared's Easter egg hunt early hours this morning before the show that Hayley piped up, and this is why we are saying this is love new and old. Jared, how long have you guys been together for now?

Three and a half months. Three and a half months. That's fresh. That's the best time. That's beautiful. At three, well, you guys lived together at three and a half months. At three and a half months, it was the first time I told Aaron that I loved him. Okay. Yeah. I just remember that beautiful feeling. Ten years later, here we are. Yeah. And it's Easter. And it's Easter. And I used to do,

we used to do little Easter hunts. Did you hear this? Yeah. We used to. We used to do them. We used to go and buy a little collection collection we'll buy a big one each and some small ones and we'd plant them around our little happy flat and then we go on a little hunt and we get a little basket and put them all in and it used to be so cute and we haven't done that in a long time now we've really let that tradition go and the other day I thought you know what I'm gonna do that in a smaller scale because we've been together for 10 years we're absolutely sick of each other. New home. New home. Like no one knows where anything is in the home,

let alone scattering eggs around to the mess. So I went and bought the two lind... Linded. Bunnies. You know, the sort of medium size, like that'll be a bit of fun. And I thought, you know, I'll buy one for me and one for him. And then we can each hide them and we'll go look for just one. Just to try to bring the spark back.

I don't know a lot but I think relationships are supposed to be this much work. Yeah, they are. Anyway, so I said to Aaron when he got home, I said, I've got a little bit of fun planned. Yeah. And he was like, oh, what we got going on here? And I said, I bought us a couple of Easter eggs. We'll just hide

them. We'll go find them. And he was like, yeah, that seems like an appropriate amount? And I said, I bought us a couple of Easter eggs. We'll just hide them. We'll go find them. And he was like, yeah, that seems like an appropriate amount of effort compared to what we used to do. None of this tea staining, leather burning crap. And then we had a bit of a conversation that led to what I'll call a light argument. Okay. I like those ones. You're like, this is almost like you just leave them to burn themselves out. You're grinding me.

Yeah. So we had a light argument, at which point, you know, one went in one room, one went in the other. And I thought, you know what? Screw you. And I went to the fridge and I took both of them out and I hid myself in the spare room and I ate them both. Do you see what you've got to look forward to in 10 years, Jared?

It's you in 10 years just sitting here downing two little Linda DeBuddies going. And then further down the track, you have kids and you send them out for the Easter egg hunt. And then when that's the final of the Easter eggs, you impose your parental tax on them. And you get your fair share of the Easter eggs to eat. Yeah. And mostly when they're in bed and you don't tell them. Yes, you steal. Yeah.

From your children. Yeah, because you're hungry and you said, I don't need chocolates in the house. That's just temptation I don't need. And then there's chocolates in the house. You're like, well, they've got to be eaten. Yeah. I shan't be taunted by temptation.

God, look at the different stages in life you've got to look forward to. I can't wait. Poetic, actually. Yeah. Interesting the different stages of Easter throughout life. What are you doing for Easter, Fletch? I'll just probably eat eggs whenever I want't wait. It was almost poetic, actually. Yeah. Interesting the different stages of Easter throughout life. What are you doing for Easter, Fletch? I'll just probably eat eggs whenever I want. Yeah.

You don't even have to think about this kind of crap. Yeah. The thing is, when I was eating... Play with yourself and have a... Play with yourself and have a lint bunny. That sounds like heaven to me. That does actually sound pretty bloody good. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. ZM. Bakery of the day. And today, Fawn and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Bakery of the day. And today it's just hot cross buns. Where do you get the best hot cross buns in New Zealand? Yeah. Where is your favourite local?

Let us know. We're just going to read them out. It's the only day we don't care about your mince and cheese pies. Or, famously, we do want to know always about a lolly slice. We live with that a lot. But it's hot cross buns only. Hot cross buns. Hot cross buns. One a penny, two a penny. Hot cross buns. Give them to your daughters. Give them to your sons. But it's hot cross buns only. Hot cross buns, hot cross buns. One a penny,

two a penny, hot cross buns. Give them to your daughters, give them to your sons. One a penny, two a penny, hot cross buns. We're being inundated.

Good. Because we're not running this like a normal bakery of the day. We're just going to shoot out regional suggestions that you send us of where to find on this day,

bestest Thursday before goodest Friday, where to find them, where they go. Daryl, whereabouts, who does the best hot cross buns? Mate, hands down, it has to be You Bake in Timaru, one of the best bakeries around. I've heard of this place because I think they've won awards for their hot cross buns.

Yeah, I believe they have. Yeah, best hot cross, voted best hot cross buns in the country in 2018. I don't know about years following, but that's a pretty, that speaks volumes. Well, I can tell you this year they placed second.

Oh, okay. I'm just looking at the shared information they shared regarding, this is from the Baking Industry Association of New Zealand. No, they came third, second to the Sydenham Bakery.

Oh, okay. And the Ardizan by Rangiora Bakery. So, they came third, second to the Sydenham Bakery. Oh, okay. And the Ardzan by Rangiora Bakery. So, Daryl, what makes them so delish? Oh, they're just, you try a hot cross bun from Countdown

and it's like, yeah, it's good, bit of butter toaster, but this one's on steroids. It's like it's got, you know, something special in it. It's magical.

Like it's baked by your nana. Yeah. Oh, you, babe. special in it. It's magical. Like it's baked by your nana. Yeah. Like a U-Bake. Chef's kiss. Okay, all right. This thing in U-Bake is good. I'm looking at their Facebook page. I don't know what it looks pretty good.

So they do a hot cross bun described due to a huge demand for these custody spicy delights. We've just made some more. It looks like a hot cross bun with a custody, custody square vibe. Yum. It's got like an icing drizzle on the top as well. That looks amazing. The top comment on that picture is from Deborah. I really hate you right now.

Since being those diabetic, I can't eat those, but I really, really want to. Oh, Deborah. Daryl, thank you for your call. Oliver, who does the best hot cross buns? Good morning. Aro Bake in Aro Valley in Wellington. An absolutely famous bakery. I'm from Wellington.

It's a goodie. It is a goodie. I don't think I've had their hot cross buns, though. What makes them? Are they dense? Yeah. They're buttery, egg-enriched, and they're glazed when they're hot. Rum apricot jam.

Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! Rum! they're hot. Rum apricot jam. Rum! Looking at AutoBake's Facebook page, look at this. Look at this. They're putting racks and racks and racks of hot cross buns into some sort of giant oven. My God. Yeah, I want to shout out all the bakers. They've been baking since about five yesterday evening. Yeah, that's good. And they were still baking when I left work at six. Oh, wow.

Wow. I mean, I'm all to praise them now. I'll be cursing them on Monday when I'm grabbing the bottom of my guts and being like, Hey, Oliver, thanks for your call. Loads of text messages. I don't even know where we start. So many text messages.

Somebody said, yes. Just yes. You mentioned Artisan by Rangiora Bakery. They do apparently a redonkulous hot cross bun. We get very excited about it I don't know if anybody's caught About baking A common theme here

But we get very excited Little Spoon You can buy online All the Wellington Harbourside markets On a Sunday They do a sourdough hot cross crumpet Ooh Okay

Crumpets you know Crumpets I will say There's one in Pointe Chef called Daily Bread. They do like fresh croissants, fresh breads and stuff. And I had one the other day and they picked it out of the car. I said, I'll have a hot cross bun, toasted with butter, of course. And they picked it out of the cabinet and put it straight into the bag.

I said, oh, no, no, I'd love to have it toasted. They said, it's fresh out of the oven, babe. And it, yes, it was. So good. No, no, no, no, no. Lots of butter. Real Bread Project in Hellensville. Somebody else said OTT Bakery in Auckland.

That's in Birkenhead. Oh, yeah. Somebody else said Magnolia Kitchen in Silverdale. A big fluffy brioche hot cross bun with the right balance of fruit and spice. I like it when people take a little spin on it. Yeah, yeah. Grey Street Bakery in Hamilton. they soak the fruit in rum.

I'll be picking up two and a half dozen this afternoon. Yum. Leave some for everybody else, but okay, sure. Bakerman's, who's been to Bakery of the Day, the first ever Bakery of the Day. Yes, they were. We went there. Courtney Messagen, currently making 150 dozen hot cross buns. Dozen?

So that's 150 times 12. Wow. Which is heaps. Well, I think we have to salute all of the bakeries. I'm not finished. Oh, yeah. Okay. I'm certainly not finished.

Run through them. Hill Park Bakery. Babco, Palmerston North has the best hot cross buns. Wynn and Yen's in Albany in Auckland, or Albany, that's all up to you how that's pronounced. No one's ever really decided. Centre Bakery in Lower Hutt do a great hot cross buns. Ema hot cross buns, that's where Fletch has bought hot cross buns in from today.

I got in yesterday at four o'clock. Yeah, do you think you got special celebrity treatment because people have been lining up for the Ema hot cross buns? No, they had a sign up and it said, come back at four, we've sold out. And this was at like 10 in the morning.

Wow. Yeah, crazy. Baker's Delight do a cherry choc hot cross bun topped with shredded coconut. Velarde Bread in Hamilton as previously confused

with another bakery last week for Baker of the Day. They've won awards for their hot cross buns multiple times. The Baker in T-Row. If anyone's going through T-Row this afternoon, heading away for Easter weekend, try safely, but always stop in T-Row and point at the big corrugated iron dog and sheep and be like, what were they thinking here?

This is madness. Yep. Lots of text messages in. Just suggestions out the yin-yang. Get one in ya. Get one in ya. Get one in ya. Just say you're going to have one and then have six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Spells. ZMD Tank. All right, it's time for ZMD Tank. Olivia joins us. Good morning, Olivia. Good morning. Olivia's looking forward to the long weekend. Yeah, are you going to...

I'm looking forward to some free shows. Yeah, girl. Well, it could be yours, Olivia. Are you going away for the long weekend? Yes, me and my wife, we're heading down to Taupo for the weekend to meet our family. So very excited. What, meet your families for the first're heading down to Taupo for the weekend to meet our family. So very excited. Meet your families for the first time or just to meet them there?

Sorry, I'm a little bit nervous. The way I said it sounded a little bit awkward, but no, we're going down to see them. She's married. She's married. I assume they've met the family. Were they not invited to the wedding? That was going to be some juicy story, if not. All right, well.

Lovely hot pools. Lovely hot pools. Lovely hot pools. Lovely hot pools. Alright, well, Olivia, you're on our imaginary ZM forecourt. ZM Petrol forecourt. We've got the best prices in the country. Yeah, we do. And the car behind you is impatient.

Now, you've got to say stop before they lose it and toot and beep and move you on. Alright? So if you can say stop before that happens, you get that dollar amount. Are you ready? I'm ready. All right. $5.

$15. $30. $80. $100. $140. $155. $180. $200.

$215. $240. $260. Ah! How much was that? $240. It was $40. $240.

Okay, wow. $240 is yours. You've locked that in. Congratulations, Olivia. Olivia, I have to tell you, everyone in the producer's booth and in the studio were so stressed at that. I know. I was like, it could go at any time.

I kept being like, stop. Stop. Stop now. You know what? I feel like I could hear you from could go at any time. I kept being like, stop, stop, stop now. You know what? I feel like I could hear you from the background going, stop, stop. You could feel our tension. Should we see how high it would have gone? Because one yesterday went to $600.

Wow. All right, let's have a listen. $20. Okay, you won that in a second. A split second. Oh my gosh. That's crazy. $240, Olivia.

Have a great long Easter weekend. You too, thank you. It's our great pleasure. All yours. And we'll do that again this morning at 8 o'clock before the long weekend group toot. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM.

I might need a change of undies after talking about these undies because Jared's just cutting open the hot cross buns that you ought to work with. Look how delicately he is fingering, though. As well he should. I've told him to watch the oven like a hawk. If he burns those, there'll be how to pay. He is fired.

Yeah, literally. I don't have that as a maternity leave cover, the audacity, the power to fire him, but I will. You do. I'm just watching. I'll deputise you. You are hereby deputised to fire anybody around here that you like. Thank you so much.

Watch it, Ger. This was kind of doing the rounds on TikTok and online yesterday. Yeah. A lady on TikTok, a lady. Well, I do declare a lady. A lady on TikTok, a lady, well, I do declare a lady, a lady,

she said you should throw away your underwear every six to nine months. What makes her qualified to say this? No, she's not. Maybe just from her own

personal experience, that's when she likes to ditch the Knicks. Wow. But a gynecologist has told a news, Australian news website that she said,

the woman in the TikTok said that bacteria, pathogens, dangerous fibres, viruses, etc. aren't destroyed by washing machines after a certain time. And the gynecologist has said that's not true. That's rubbish. You don't need to throw out your underwear every six to nine months providing you're wearing a fresh pair every day

and you wash them in a hot wash. Oh, see sometimes they're cold. You should be doing a hot wash. Okay. She said they should last until you're not happy with them. Until they sag out. Right.

You know when they get sag? Yeah. A bit loose. Oh, you know when the elastic snaps and all those little fibrous elastic-y bits start springing out? Have you seen that? If you've got undies, especially on ladies' undies, they always have this little strings of elastic

that start to snap out and spray. And you look at it and it looks a little bit like grey pubic hair on the side. And then you see, oh, it's just the undies. Oh, but it's not. It's just the deterioration and the breaking of it. Well, this woman online, at Kitty Chemist, does sell her own range of feminine hygiene products. So everybody's like, this is what you've got to watch for.

People giving this sort of advice are generally trying to sell you something. Yeah, because the, well, especially, I will talk on behalf of vagina owners. Please do. It would be inappropriate if, for example, Fletch was to speak on behalf of vagina owners. Yeah, no, I cannot. Vagina owners, vaginas are incredible living organisms. Right.

They can often sort themselves out. That's the whole point of them is that they sort themselves out. So this sort of TikTok person who has no qualification to be telling us about this, she was like you can get infections from it. And it's like your vagina is so powerful it would be pretty hard to be getting an infection

from a clean pair of undies. They're basically the new self-cleaning ovens, aren't they? The vagina. Absolutely. You don't have to do much, just make sure it's off at the wall at night. And put it on 400 degrees every now and again. Absolutely. You don't have to do much. Just make sure it's off at the wall at night. Definitely, yeah. And put it on 400 degrees every now and again. Absolutely. It'll just bake everything off. Give it a blast.

Get it a service. Yeah. Every now and then. Just make sure. You can upgrade it every now and then. Right. But that's the thing. I'll keep my boxes until there are holes in them.

Boxes? Are you a silky boxer, man? No, I'm a boxer brief. Boxer briefs. All of them boxer briefs. Yep. And then, say, for example, I get like a little hole or maybe some pilling or some wearing, they become the gym undies.

Oh, my God. Or like, you know, second tier undies. You'd never wear those on a date. My gym, I call them gym Gs. Gym Gs, yeah. My gym undies are repugnant. Like, if anyone was to see them and think, are these your undies? No, no, no, no.

They're just for the gym. I'll wear them for like an hour, two hours max, and then they go on the walk. They weren't the ones the students next door were stealing at your old flat, were they? Oh, God, I hope not. But I've had some undies for a good few years. Yeah, same.

That's the thing I just wear. I couldn't even tell you. Nah. I just add to the rotation. I add to them, yeah. And then only when they're really sort of falling apart am I like, see you later. They become like sleeping. You can sleep in those ones.

Or if they don't fit. Yeah, that's what actually this gynecologist that was consulted said, that if underwear is too tight, it can cause some irritation to the self-cleaning oven. Absolutely. And that's when it's time to say goodbye to them. And get some bigger ones. Yeah, and you do have to let it breathe, like at night. You shouldn't be wearing undies to bed.

Oh, yeah. Okay. Get some air in there. Okay. Again, I can't speak to... Again, we can't speak for the ovens. Well, I'm telling. The ownership of the oven.

I'm more of a microwave guy myself. We've been talking about the term sleep divorces a fair bit recently. It's a term that's on the rise. Talking about couples sleeping in separate beds actually being something that might be good for their sex life. But they stay together. They're not divorcing. Same house.

They just have little separate bedrooms or separate beds because sometimes the lack of romance from snoring and the likes totally strips any sexiness away. So we've got Morgan Penn, sexologist in the studio, to talk to us about these sleep divorces. What's your take on it, Morgan? Well, I mean, there's pros and cons to it, of course, and it just depends what values the person,

the people in the relationships place on sleeping in the same bed, sex and a good night's sleep. So for me, yeah, if I was with a snorer, I value sleep very highly. So I'd be pissed off and angry the next day. Resentful. Resentful. Not wanting to really get jiggy with that person.

Gosh, no. You're not going to wake that person up for a little middle-of-the-night nookie, are you? No, exactly. But the other thought is, like, the bed in a relationship is like a sacred space, right? It's sort of where intimacy happens. It's where connection happens. The world can be wild out there. But in the bed, that can be sometimes your only time, alone time, especially if there's kids around.

Yep. Yes. So, yeah, I mean, it really depends. And what I do like about it is that quite often couples think that they're just going to assume that sex is on, right? You're in the same bed and it might just happen that night. Whereas if you're in separate beds, you have to make an effort and you have to proposition. So you kind of woo and you make to make an effort and you have to proposition.

So you kind of woo and you make more of an effort instead of just assuming. But what about if you made it fun? Like, ring, ring, hello, it's reception. I've got those towels you were after. Oh, bring up the towels. A little bit of playfulness. Toe, I like it. And then you knock on her door.

Yeah, knock, knock, knock. And then I open the door and she's like, where are the towels? I said, I like it. And then you knock on her door. Knock, knock, knock. And then I open the door and she's like, where are the towels? I said, I forgot the towels. And then there's a whole towel thing. Are you dressed in your Ridges uniform? Yes, yes. Balboa. Yes, my Balboa outfit with the little hat on. Yep, nice. I'm ready to go.

But people were saying, you know, like it does make them feel kind of young again, like they're sneaking around a little bit or like having little date night visits in the bed. So it could actually add a little element of fun, as you say, Vaughn. Don't you think? Yeah, I think the issue that we run into is that once you start doing that, it's very hard to come back from that as well.

And so you need to like get some good rituals going on so that there is bedtime rituals. So even if you're not going to get jiggy with it with each other that night, you're still going to tuck each other in and have some closeness and maybe some spooning, some hugging. Because even what happens with the nervous system when we sleep together in the same bed

is that we co-regulate. And so there's the safety and this deeper connection that's formed just being close to another person. I hate co-regulating with my fiancé. Oh, he just wakes up every hour. Because he's six foot six. He's ginormous. And then he'll wake up in the first, he'll never wake up

and then just be like, okay, I'll try to get back to sleep. He's always like, all right, iPad out, have a watch a little something. Oh, yeah. Now, these are not decisions I'm making. That's what I'm regulating with. Yeah, and when you're on breakfast radio, I don't know how you'll find it. Well, I know it's Fletch. I mean, he would never share a bed. Too selfish.

Never share a bed. This is not about me, okay? I have slept divorce long ago. Yeah, from everyone. See, but no, I'd love a spoon before bed. Yeah. Spoons. But then it's like, okay, I'm done with spooning. Let's sleep divorce. Yeah, I. But then it's like, okay, I'm done with spooning. Let's sleep divorce.

Yeah, I sleep divorce. Morgan's like, oh, where do we begin? She's like, it's a long book, this chapter. But I do a mini sleep divorce. So cuddles and then split. Separate. Separate, but in the same bed still. Big bed.

Yeah. So split sides. Don't touch me. Don't look at me. Don't breathe on me. See you in the morning. And it works? Well, yeah, I think so. I mean, people are obviously doing it more because it's got

its term now, sleep divorce, but do you think there's still a stigma? Like, if people found out that you as a couple were sleeping in separate beds, they'd be like, oh, it's not a good relationship. It makes me think of old people. Well, that's exactly right. That's where we've seen it. But when we think back,

right back to when we used to do it, why we would do it is because we lived in caves and little shacks and there were other people around so it was for safety. You know, but we don't actually need that anymore.

So, and this is the amazing time we get to build our relationship how we want it to be and how it works and how it's functional for each of each of us so good night sleeps do what you need to do uh well morgan pen if you would like to uh know more about morgan pen uh or you'd like more information morgan pen with two n's dot co dot nz

uh trained uh certified somatic sexologist what's somatic mean mean? Well, soma is the Greek word for body. So somatic is to work sort of holistically with the body. So I work with talk therapy, but also hands-on. Like I can go internally, baby. The mapping of the young eye, I believe that's called, Hayley, with that shocked look on her face. I want this. All right, on the desk. All right, let's go to a song.

You've got two and a half minutes, Morgan. Map away. Morgan, thank you for coming in. Such a pleasure. Thank you. I've got some shocking statistics for you, for you singles out there who may be in the dating scene. So not me, not Vaughan.

This is more for you. out there who may be in the dating scene, so not me. Not Vaughan. This is more for you. Okay, great. 60% of men in a recent survey have revealed that they will judge a first date on their drink order. 60% and they would call it a deal

breaker. God, I judge everybody on their drinks order. Well, just 32% of women do on a first date. Right. Oh, yeah. Okay, say we're on a date. I'm going to run a couple of drink combos past you. Vodka soda with a wedge of lime. Except.

What are you worrying about that for? That's what I think. Okay, next drink order. Karuba and Coke. Karuba? Wait, do you ask for Karuba or do you just say rum and Coke? No, I ask for Karuba. You ask for rum and Coke. Karuba and Coke. Karuba? Wait, do you ask for Karuba or do you just say rum and Coke? No, I ask for Karuba. You ask for rum and Coke.

Karuba and Coke. That's a deal breaker. That's alarm bells. Yeah. I don't know if it would be a deal breaker. Deal breaker for me is like something milk based. Oh, like if someone got a white Russian. Yeah, or if someone was like, you know.

Like a Bailey's. I love a Bailey's. A Midorian lemonade. A Bailey's isn't a date drink. Or what if you went to like a fancy restaurant and someone was like, you're like, I'll just have a glass of your house Sauvignon Blanc. Where's it from? Marlborough.

Beautiful region. What are you going to have? You know, Smirnoff Ice. Like if you were at a fine Italiano restaurant and someone's ordering an RTD yeah do you guys do those piccati breezes

here yeah the purple ones got any pals in the fridge is pulse still a thing because I want to get drunk but I also want my heart to remind me it's there

yeah yeah so okay so it's a I mean I think you we'd all do that wouldn't we we'd judge I'd judge't we? We'd judge I'd judge

even like going out for dinner with friends I'd judge people's drink orders. Especially if you've got something nice and there's like a nice cocktail option I'd have a giggle at some orders but I wouldn't judge so to speak I'd be like If we're drinking at someone's house

and you're drinking a vodka soda that's fine Yeah. Because we're drinking at someone's house And you're drinking a vodka soda That's fine Yeah Because we're drinking Yeah But if you're getting like A nice cocktail To prefix

The upcoming meal and conversation Yeah And you get a vodka soda I'm like Live a little Yeah Right But then a cocktail

Could be more expensive Could be twice the price We're here baby Okay We're living So Three in five people in this survey said a martini would make the ultimate good impression. So James Bond had it absolutely correct there.

If somebody ordered a martini on a date, I'd be like, who do you think you are? Oh, so that's a bit sort of pretentious. I think that's two. Ooh la la. Maybe an espresso martini. An espresso martini? Oh my God. If you're on a hen's night, maybe.

Other drinks that leave good impressions. 46% of people said a gin and tonic is absolutely a good impression. That's my gin and tonic, very acceptable. That's my go-to. So many good gins. Manhattans, 45%. 42% cosmopolitans or whiskey sours. Whiskey sours.

I mean, this is not a specifically New Zealand-based study. Because we're more wine drinkers in New Zealand. I wouldn't often go to dinner, particularly with food, and order a cocktail or a whiskey salad or something. I would always get wine. I'd start with a cocktail. Absolutely. Could we take some calls now?

Is there a date for you that is an absolute, a drink on a date that's an absolute deal breaker? Like if you're going out on a first date and somebody orders this, it's alarm bells. Maybe it is the Karuba and Cola. Or maybe they take you down the local bowls club and they order a tourley, a tourley of Lion Red. Leave it in the bottle.

Do you want a glass? Nah. That's kind of cool. Yeah, actually, that's kind of, yeah. That'd be endearing. All right, so 0800DARLS.M, give us a call. You can text as well, 9696. When was an order on a date a deal breaker?

Midori lemonade. Yeah. Unacceptable. And even if you haven't been on a date, but what would that one drink be? If it came out, you'd be like, okay, this is not going to be a long-term thing. What about a Jagerbomb with a steak? No.

A Jagerbomb. That's Jagermeister and a Red Bull. Yeah, Jagermeister and you drop it into a glass of Red Bull and you neck it. Right. I assume the person that's ordering this is wearing two popped collars on polo. Yeah, absolutely. Okay. All right, what is your deal breaker drink?

So, ladies, woman, wahine your deal breaker drink? So ladies, woman, wahine. Straight wahine. 60% of men will judge you on a date on that very first drink that you order. Whereas men, it's only 30% of women that judge that first drink. Maybe if you're known

to have an embarrassing first drink order, you should have that at home before you go. What about preloading? Yeah, a little pre-date preload. And then just go with something quite plain, do you think, for that first date? Yeah, you turn up with a couple of Zambookas on board and then you order a glass of the house pen agree.

You're like, I just... It's nice. We want to know what that deal breaker drink is. If you're on a first date and they have this drink and they order it, you're like, no, this is not going to work. Diesel. Someone text messaged in, diesel. Anika, you also are not a fan of diesel?

Absolutely not. Now, just... Go on. A couple of nights out with the friends, when they pull out the diesel, it's a no-go. It's all over, right? It's not your future husband. I used to be a bourbon and coke in a can girl when I was about 19, 20, 21.

Right. 22, 23-ish, through to 29. 24, yeah. I drank bourbon in a can. So much sugar. Yeah. You always told me that scar on your face, Hayley, was from a childhood accident, but now I know it's from a diesel-induced Wellington street ball.

Yeah, you fell on a can. Someone can't be with a split can of diesel. So, Anika, you won't give it long if he orders a diesel? No, it's not husband material. Oh, yeah. So what is husband material drinking, then? I don't know.

Probably not alcohol, really. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Yeah, right. Maybe a nice green tea on a first date for you. At a restaurant. Because that's what lots of people said, Annika.

Lots of people have messaged in if they go out for a nice dinner and they order a soft drink. It's a real, like, we're about to have a nice meal and you're just going to have a fizzy, sugary soda. Yeah.

Okay, all right. We'll keep your texts coming in. 9696 0800 dials at M. That first date deal breaker drink that you just cannot stand somebody ordering. We're talking about those drinks that people order on a date that are absolute deal breakers for you.

60% of men judge women on their first drink order and only 30% of women judge men on that drink. Yeah. Well, we're hearing from many women who would judge many men. Okay. On the drinks. Perhaps they missed the survey.

Yeah. So, yeah, these are the ones that didn't get to speak up in the survey. Somebody said, I went on a date with a guy. I ordered a glass of wine. I just thought, keep it simple, glass of wine. He ordered a traffic light. Now,ry that man Oh my god

You aren't familiar what a traffic light is It was an absolute Cobb & Co classic A staple

along with the Pink Panther Yes The Pink Panther That was too creamy for me That got me gut sick as a kid

But the traffic light was different viscosity drink so it would stack up and on the top there'd be red, yellow and then green on the bottom.

But the green would go bluey. Yes. It would be a real mess by the end of things. But when you're a kid, it was just such a monumental thing to watch be made. It was a mind blow, wasn't it? Because you're like, how are they doing this? And how is it not mixing? How is it not mixing?

Somebody else said that they went on a date with a guy, and you could tell he was nervous but also really eager to impress, and he ordered a Point Gris wine. If I could just have the Point Gris. And Norman looked confused. He ended up saying Point Gris about four times. That's been no hon. Reiterate, reiterate.

Hon. Hon. Point Gris. Point Gris! Imagine if he was like, fine, if you don't have it, just a Point Noir then. Someone said, went on a date once. The guy ordered a purple guana. I was like, oh, we are in for a hell of a time here.

Deal breaker, he ordered a tequila soda as a drink, which is an odd mess. No, tequila soda is like a diet drink is an odd mess. No, tequila soda's like a diet drink. Because it's Yeah, it's a tequila, right? There's no sugar in it or something. But he had a shot of tequila on the side so this drink came out tequila soda with a tequila on the side. On a first

date. First drink on a first date. Juliet, what's your drink deal breaker? It'd be either an espresso martini or an RTD. Okay, RTD, I'm with you, but espresso martinis, that's class all over, isn't it? No, I hate espresso martinis.

Oh dear, we would not be friends. Right, but to me, that's a good drink to start the night if you're planning a big one, because, you know, it's alcohol and it's a bit of coffee. Kicks you up. Yeah. Yeah, if you're going out for dinner and you're having that and you're eating, it's kind of like,

your person's not really bad if I want to kiss you. No, actually, that's a really good point. They're drinking a milky coffee drink and then they're going to go into some savoury mains and then they might want to kiss later and it's all curdled up in their guts and they might give you a little kiss burp. You know when you're having a kiss and a little burp comes out?

Yes. And then you've got that. Gross! And you can smell it and taste it. Oh, yuck. Okay, Juliet, thanks for your call. Kat, what is your deal-breaker drink? My deal-breaker drink is Cody's.

So, okay, so you meet a guy on Tinder, you go to the bar, and he orders a drink and it's a Cody's. How long do you leave it till you're out of there? Probably, I reckon, 20 minutes. Yeah. Give him a chance to finish two or three Cody's and then you're out of there. Two or three Cody's, they're about two and a half standard drinks per can. Yeah, it's a court case in a can, really.

Are you letting him order one of those monster ones, you know, those huge cans of Codys, or are you making him stick to the small, petite cans? You know what? Even if he just ordered the small one, it would, yeah. If the word Codys comes out of his mouth,

you're done. Yeah, but what if, for example, Kat, he's a 10 out of 10 in the looks department and he still orders a Cody's? Nah, still a deal breaker, mate. Good on you, mate. Yeah, I'm out. Brilliant. Kat, thanks for your call. Some text messages in on it.

Drink order. Drink order deal breakers. This one's hot off the press. Okay. A Mad Jacks and a mudslide. My student days were fuelled by Mad Jacks. Mad Jacks rum. Well, when I was a student, it was a $10 bottle of rum.

It was Cristobal vodka, Mad Jacks rum, Wilson's whiskey. There was all these like nasty drinks. Yeah. But they were so cheap. It was rocket fuel. That's well gone, eh? A $10 bottle of rum is a thing of the past. Because I remember they brought in more taxes

because it was too cheap. People were getting it too easy. Mine was the Christoph vodka goon sack with orange. Yes. Those were dangerous. And you'd be like, hey, do you want to go halves on a goon tonight? A goon sack. And then one of you would get the pillow at the end of the night.

Yeah, before sleep in the bush. Somebody said, I was on a date with a guy once. They said, do you want some water for the table? He said, yes. They said, tap still or sparkling? He said, still water. And immediately a shudder ran down my spine. Who's paying for still water?

It's the same amount of tap. You're going to get the tap water for free. I came across very pretentious. You either get sparkling because you're like, I want a little treat, or you just head under the tap. Somebody said, I was out on a date with a guy and he ordered an Aperol Spritz. I was like, what's going to happen here?

What's wrong with an Aperol? I would order an Aperol Spritz. What's going to happen here? I love that you're like, interesting. What's going to happen here? What's going to happen here? I was on a date. This is from a guy.

I was on a date with a is from a guy. Okay. I was on a date with a girl. We were in the Waikato, and she had a go at the bar for not having Waikato draft on tap. I was like, oh, I've got to leave before she stabs me with her pig-hunting knife. I assume it was a pig-hunting knife. Somebody said if somebody ordered Mateus Rosé.

For shame. What's wrong with Mateus Rosé. For shame. What's wrong with Mateus Rosé? It's got the nice looking bottle. Is it cheap? It's so cheap. It's like $10 a bottle.

It's cheap but it's got a great little story on the back about the vineyard in World War II. And it's actually not a bad drop. No. You know,

for like a barbecue, you sort of, I'll just bring some along to put into the mix. Yeah. Am I working with too trash? No, I'm not trash. I'm not trash.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan Am I working with too trash? No, I'm not trash. I'm not trash. Let's give away some free fuel. Chris, good morning. Hey, how you going, guys? Good, good. All right, so this is how it works. You're on our imaginary ZM forecourt. You're filling up, and the car behind you is very impatient. So impatient.

You have to fill up and say stop before the car behind you loses it and toots and moves you on. The dollar amounts will increase. You can say stop at any time. If you fail to do that, though... You get nothing. You get nothing.

You lose. Are you ready, Chris? All right, let's do it. Here we go. $5. You lose. Are you ready, Chris? All right, let's do it. Here we go. $5. $10. $30. $65.

$135. $155. $180. $180. $200. $205. $230. Stop, stop. We'll stop there.

Okay. Chris, who come collected Chris? Yeah, just stop. That's a bad. Just stop there. I'm happy with that. $230 is locked in, Chris. Should we see how high it would have gone? Yeah, let's do it.

I've been listening all week, so I was just like, I'll bet you I'll be the one that gets like 20. All right. Oh, okay. Oh, my God, I loved that when that happened. So that was it. That was it. All right.

Well, you did. Nick of time, Chris. Congratulations. $230. Woo! Free fuel is all yours. Enjoy the long weekend. So that was it That was it Alright Well Nick of time Chris congratulations $233 Free fuel Let's go Enjoy the long weekend Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast

ZM Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's Long weekend group two I'm waiting for it That group two I want it Look Look

Look at the fine lines Yes Full to the brim. And what a coverage. Tauranga, Hamilton, Christchurch, Wellington, Whangarei. Now, I was just trying to remember, last Easter, was that cancelled because of COVID? I know that we did the weekend, long weekend group tour.

I can't remember if that was for ANZAC weekend. We did the driveway edition. Yeah, we did the driveway edition, but I feel like... I know, I don't, I can't remember. We've blocked that time of our lives out. We have, we've let it go. I think we did the driveway edition for Easter, and maybe Anzac we were away.

Right, so this is how it works if you're new to the show and you have never heard the Long Weekend Group Tote. We ask you to call us in traffic on 0800 Dials at M and give us the first part of the long weekend group toot. You have your window down and your phone ready. And then this is where the rest of us come in. If you hear anybody doing that in your car this morning, you follow up with two small toots.

Easy as that. So if it works for you and you call through, it should ideally sound like this. Oh, yes. Dan, miss a beat. Now we always welcome newcomers. Yep. It's an easier way to remember

if you're going to partake in the lead toot. It's one, two, one, two, three, one, two, three, four. One, two, three, one, two, three, four. One, two. Stop. Let somebody else do the final one, two, one, two, three, one, two, three, four. One, two, three, one, two, three, four. One, two. Stop. Let somebody else do the final one, two. All right, Danielle joins us from Hamilton.

Good morning. Good morning. No pressure. You're the first one. Yeah, thanks, Professor. Whereabouts in Hamilton are you, Danielle? So I'm just coming up to Norton Road. Famously, Norton has responded previously.

Okay, all right. Well, Danielle, give us the long weekend group two when you're ready. Okay. No. No. Not the start. We were hoping for a wonderful turning from you. Should we try again? Why don't we try again? Your rhythm is perfect. Yeah, it's great. No! Not the start we were hoping for, but wonderful turning from on your behalf.

Should we try again? Why don't we try again? Your rhythm is perfect. Yeah, it's great. Okay, hang on. I'm just going to... Oh, there's not really... Okay, hang on. I'm having another go.

Yeah, go. Do it. No! Go! It's wanting. Danielle, through no fault of your own no not your fault Raina good morning

morning alright whereabouts in Todong are you Papamoa I'm in like Doncaster area okay alright when you're ready

it's getting so built up over there when you're ready give us a long weekend group toad alright nope When you're ready, give us a long weekend group tote. All right. Nope, nothing.

Oh, my God. I thought I heard something. I thought I heard something. It's Easter. It's Easter. Get in the spirit. Not a good start. Zero from two.

Let's try the South Island. Nathan, Christchurch, good morning. Morning, guys. How are you? Good. Whereabouts in the Garden City are you? Just around Northlands Mall. Okay. When you're ready, Nathan, give us a long weekend group toot.

Alright, guys. Here we go. Oh, wait. Wait. It was only one toot reply. Now, it must be a double toot to accept it. Go again. Go again, Nathan. Now, it must be a double toot. It must be a double toot. To accept it. Go again.

Go again, Nathan. All right, let's go again. Yay! We're on the board. You know what? We'll take that, Nathan. First one for the Easter weekend long group toot. You're a legend, mate, on the honours board.

Let's go to Wellington now near the tunnel. Which tunnel, Wilson? I'm actually now around Kilbirnie. I missed the tunnel. You were in the toot tunnel there. You were in the toot tunnel. All right. Give us a long weekend group toot, Wilson.

Cool. No. No. Oh, Simon. Wellington loves a toot. I think we should give another go. You reckon? Another go? Yeah, Wellington loves a toot.

Come on, Mr Bernie. OK. No. Oh, Wilson, thank you. Thank you anyway. Let's go to Whangarei. Janine, thank you. Thank you anyway. Let's go to Whangarei. Janine, good morning. Good morning, guys.

How's it going? Good. Not that great, Janine. We're only a quarter success here. We'd love to bolster those numbers with some support from Whangarei. Well, yeah, I'm trying. I've just dropped off one of my children, and there's literally no traffic on the road that I'm on.

Okay, Janine, we'll pop you on hold and come back. We'll come back to you. Let's try Anton in Auckland. Whereabouts are you, Anton? I'm in Otara. All right, okay. Well, let's give it a go, Anton. When you're ready, the long weekend group toot.

Okay, let's do it. Yeah. No. What? I thought I heard a one-toot reply. I think you heard what you wanted to hear. Yeah, you're hearing things. I'm projecting.

I'm projecting now. Jesus, we are, guys. Fantastic tooting. I know. One for five. Through no fault of our own tooters. Is it the weather? It's so grey and wet.

Come on, cheer up. It's the last day of the work week. Yes. We're on to the long weekend. Kate is in the car with her son, Connor. Good morning, team. Hi, guys. All right, whereabouts in Auckland are you?

We're on the North Shore. We're at Wire Owl Road. All right. Packed. Okay, give us the long weekend group, too. All right, here we go. Yes! Yes! Yes!

Yes, yes, yes. Got him! Jesus, are you driving a Mack truck? That horn was honky. We're in a golf. Oh, Volkswagen Golf. I did not know that was their horn. Neither did I, but Kate, thank you so much.

That's great. Your Volkswagen's probably about to break down and cost you a fortune to get fixed, so we'll let you get back to that. Tanya in Hamilton, good morning. Good morning. Alright, we've had a failure already this morning, Tanya. I don't want to put the pressure on Hamilton and yourself, but

when you're ready, Tanya, give us a long-wicking grip to it. Alright. Alright. Yay! Yay! Give us a long weekend group toad. All right. Yeah! Yeah! Yes, you did it! Woo-hoo!

Go Hamilton! Oh, Hamilton, you did it. Hamilton, you cheeky rascal. You're back on the good books. Thanks, Tanya. Vanessa, also in Hamilton, do you reckon you can follow that up with another Hamilton group toad?

Before we get in another three minutes, as I'm coming up to a Fairfield Bridge. You're coming up to the Fairfield Bridge. Okay, so should we... There's a lot of traffic there. So should we... We'll pop you on hold, we'll pop you on hold. Let's go now to Candice. Kensley and Emerson, good morning. Say good morning.

Good morning. All right, worry about you, you're also in Hamilton. Yeah, we are in Chartwell. Okay, give us a long weekend group two. When you're ready. Okay, there's not very much traffic now. It's actually flowing really well. So I'm going to try. Okay, give it a go.

No, no. Oh, no. Hamilton. They sound like they're ripping past you, those cars. Should we see if Janine and Farngaday's got some more traffic around her? Yeah, all right, let's try to Janine. Janine, are you in traffic? Yeah, we're by Burger King and Farngaday Intermediate. There'll be heaps of people there.

Okay, go. When you're ready, Janine. All right. Oh, my God. Okay, so maybe nobody listens to them. Hey, as long as we've got you, Janine. That's all that matters, Janine. Every day, guys. Every day.

That's a winner in my box, Janine. Thanks. Let's go back to Hamilton. Hayley, how are you getting on there? Oh, God, we've just come off the main drag where there was heaps of traffic, but we'll give it a go anyway. I'm going up to five crossroads.

Okay, alright. When you're ready, Hayley. Okay. Okay. Yes! Oh, God, the joy with Hamilton. What a hot spot today. So we're apparently at 40% success. We're running a 4 from 10.

Okay, that's not bad. Hayley on the honours board. Thank you so much. Olivia in Christchurch, good morning. Hello. All right, whereabouts are you in Christchurch? In Hornby. Hornby.

All right, when you're ready, give us the long weekend group toot. I'll give it a go, but there's not much traffic around me now. Yeah, I'm hearing a lot of this. I'm hearing a lot of excuses. I think City's sorting out their public transports, playing havoc with our long weekend group toot. Alright, here we go. Okay.

You didn't believe in yourself from the beginning. Nah, yeah, you felt it. You need to back yourself. It felt... Olivia. Doubtful, didn't it? That's a no. Thank you for trying, though.

I think we need to take a little intermission, a little quick break. We need to take a break. We're down to half time. Does everyone need a pep talk? My heart race is sky high. We need to bring it down. All right, let's start.

Come back next. If you would like to participate in the long weekend group tour, 0800-DARZATM. The last throws of the dice are next. Come on, we need start. Come back next. If you would like to participate in the long weekend group tour, 0800-DARZATM, the last throws of the dice are next. Come on, we need 100% hit rate. We need to at least get up to 50. What I want everybody to embody when we come back, when we come back, I want everyone to take five, but when we come back, I want everyone to embody the same spirit

that we saw from the Vodafone Warriors last weekend when they broke a club record with the ultimate second half comeback. They were 21 points down to the Canberra Raiders. Are you doing a sports analogy? No, just telling you exactly what happened in the sports fan. I don't know if there's

much analogy to it. I also want to see the kind of comeback that Jesus made and that's who we're actually celebrating. He was dead! And he was like,

not today, Dad! Not today! Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's long weekend group toot. I'm waiting for it, that group toot. I want it. Now, I don't know if this is our most successful long weekend group toot. We're running at, what, 40% success rate? I blame the weather.

You know what? I blame the weather. No, we're less than 40% success rate. Right now, we're four from 11, so we're below 40. We've fallen below the 40% threshold. It's a game of two halves, though, isn't it? 100% and it's a second half comeback. It really is.

Here we go. Warriors style. Let's start with Hazel. Good morning, Hazel, in Auckland. Hi. All right. Whereabouts in Auckland are you? Oh, goodness.

You've just missed the traffic now. Oh, why is everybody saying that today? All right. Hi. I'm in a red light. traffic now. Oh, why is everybody saying that today? Alright, hey. Hi, I'm in a red light, so we could try. Alright, let's try. Let's try the long weekend group too. Let's go. We'll see.

Oh, no. This is not a great start. We can't hear you, Hazel. It's like a forward pass to knock on, you know? I think we've lost, Hazel. Let's go to Vanessa in Hamilton. Vanessa? Hi, I'm just pulling up to the red light now, so I'm going to try now.

Perfect. In Hamilton, go for it. Two different replies. Two different replies. Yeah. Two different replies. It only counts! Yes! Two different replies! It only counts as one, though. Hamilton is an absolute hotbed this morning.

Yeah, it's ups and downs. Thank you, Vanessa. Kate in Auckland, good morning. Hi. Now, whereabouts are you calling from? I'm on the Northern Motorway in Auckland. Good. Is it crawling?

Okay. All right, give us a long weekend, Group 2. When you're ready, Kate. All right, I've got to turn the windows down. Okay. All right, give us a long weekend group too. When you're ready, Kate. All right, I've got to turn the windows down. Okay. All right. Yes, yes, yes, yes. We heard one.

I heard it. You've got to hear this. It was low, and your phone wanted to gate that noise out. But it's in there, baby. It's in there. Brilliant. Kate, actually, because you're in there, baby. It's in there. Brilliant. Actually, because you're in Auckland, I've got some tickets to give away. A couple of tickets to Happy Place, the most Instagrammable event ever.

Tickets for this go on sale today. HappyPlaceNZ.me, presented by ZM and Spark. All the details, ZM and I. And Hayley and I are very excited about this. Thank you. Thank you. You're welcome. We'll wait there and we'll sort those out for you.

Jess in Tauranga, good morning. Hi, how are you going? Good. Now, whereabouts are you in Tauranga? I am just about to come up to the Elizabeth Street roundabout. Oh, good. Okay. Elizabeth's always clogged this time of the morning.

Yeah. All right. Let's hear that long weekend grip too, Jess. All right. Give me five seconds and I'm about to pull up at the red light there. Really build this up, Jess. You're asking the whole nation to wait, Jess. A team of five million to wait, Jess.

No, don't be sorry. If it pays off, it was worth the wait. Absolutely. If it doesn't. Oh, my gosh. This is like the longest five seconds of my life. I'm sorry. This is definitely longer than five seconds, Jess.

All right. I'm pulling up now. I'm just going to wind down my window. Okay, wind down your window. I probably would have done that in that five seconds that you had to spare just before. All right. That's right. Here we go. Are we ready?

Yes. Come on. Come on. We waited for nothing. Let's do it again. We waited. We waited. Go again, Jess. Yes, we want results. We waited for nothing. Let's do it again. We waited. Go again, Jess. Yes, we want results.

Go again, Jess. Okay, go. Okay, I've got someone next to me. Okay. Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes. I'm going to give the thumbs up next time. Yes!

Thumbs up back to you. Good, New Zealanders. Ash and Lower Heart, give us a long weekend group toot. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning. All right. Ready?

Yes. Yes! Oh, Ash, you really thumped that horn. I did. Come on. That was a good one. I don I think I just put it out there. Yeah, it was good. And then the reply was swift.

That's so good. That's a comeback like no other. We're going to do two more. Okay, that's just like the 17. Do you know, at the moment, we've gone over 50% because we've had nothing but success in the last half. Well, no pressure. Leanne and Candice join us now from Invercargill,

our first Southland toot. Good morning. Hi. All right, let's get that radio off and let's get the long weekend group toot happening. Okay, here we go. We're at the Queen's High Pastry Light. Okay.

Okay. Yes! Oh, yes! Not a single beat in the rhythm either. What was your... What kind of car are you driving? A Holden Commodore. A Holden Commodore.

I was going to say it sounded like a Holden or a Ford, like a big classic. We're going to the cargo, come on. It sounds like a sort of horn you hear just before you get in a road rage fist fight, you know? Leanne and Candice, brilliant. You're on the leaderboard. And our last call today, we go to Kelly in Warkworth.

Good morning, Kelly. Good morning. Now, hold on. Hold your horses there, Kelly. Now, Warkworth is an absolute bottleneck on long weekend traffic, but people aren't heading away for the weekend yet, are they? Well, we have. We've been driving around for about 10 minutes

and we've missed all the traffic and all the lights, so now we're just... I don't know. I'm not holding my breath to be honest. See, I don't think... I'd rather finish on a strong note. We were at nine successful group tours out of 16. You just want me to hang up on Kelly? I think we just cut her loose. Set her free.

No, but I've got faith in Kelly. I've got faith as well. Ye of little faith. Now, Kelly, are there any cars around you? Yeah, there are. I'm just coming up. We're kind of all moving. We're not stopped. As long as you're near them.

See, Vaughan, I think we've got to try Kelly. Same, same. Alright, Kelly, when you're ready, give us the last long weekend Easter group toast. Okay. Hang on. Is this supposed to open? Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Yeah!

Fuck it! Yeah, he's fucking... No! This is what I was doing! I was telling them they couldn't do it! You know nothing, Jon Snow I was like the teacher at high school That told you you'd go nowhere

I knew you would I knew you would Yes, Kelly You had no faith That's our redemption That's our redemption We rang last time And no one did it

So we're on the board now You redeemed yourself I was lucky you didn't tell them You're on the board He would have hung up on you He would have hung up on you I would have reached across How do you work out your percentage?

Well, how many? What's the total? It's 10 out of 17. Don't you divide 10 by 17? This is embarrassing. Times 100. Our 58% success rate today, guys. Yeah, 58.8.

So we should round that up to 59. I think we'll just round that up to a clean 16. I just Googled it. You Googled 10 out of 17 percentage. Yeah. You don't need to do maths anymore. If kids are listening a clean 60. I just Googled it. You Googled 10 out of 17 percentage. Yeah. You don't need to do maths anymore. If kids are listening, don't do maths. Google does it.

Yeah. Or your phone. Your phone does it. 58.8. I think we'll round that up to 60. 60. Well, we're Swedish. We're Swedish.

We round. Yeah. 60% success. All right. Fact of the day is next on ZM. Thank you, New Zealand. Have a fantastic long weekend. Drive safely. ZM's Fletch

Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is if the weather's right, you can see the Earth's shadow. If you're on the space station? If you're right here on Earth.

Helps if you're by the sea. What do you mean you can see the Earth's shadow? You can see the Earth's shadow. So, you know, this happens at sunrise and at sunset. Ah, because the stage, it hits the stage, it bounces off the end of the flat Earth. Ah, yes, it'll hit the wall and then you'll see the shadow coming. Because I was of the dum-dum opinion that the angle of the sun,

both sunrise and sunset, is so close to the particular part of the earth that you're on that it casts a shadow onto the atmosphere and it's that dark blue belt you'll see above the horizon. Oh, is that the Earth's shadow? That's the Earth's shadow reflecting off our own atmosphere. I want to see this. Because our atmosphere has a thickness to it. Here, I've got a picture of it, the Earth's shadow loaded up.

This is a sunset Earth's shadow. So you look in the opposite direction to the sunset. So if you're in New Zealand and you're on the west coast, you would see this sunrise. Yep. And if you're on the east coast, you would see this sunrise. Yep. And if you're on the East Coast, you'd see this sunset looking out towards the ocean. You'll see a thin blue belt, a very dark blue, and it looks shadowy.

And you'll be like, well, that is the Earth's shadow reflecting off our atmosphere. So we're casting a little shadow. I didn't know that. But you know what? It wouldn't work if it was a flat Earth. No. Oh, no, because they think the sun's a lamp.

Well, it depends where the stage lights are. Yeah, they think the sun's a moving lamp. It depends on what the director of the Truman Show is warning you to see at that moment. Basically, yeah. That's right. So, yeah, you can look at it. If there's fine weather this weekend and you're on a coast,

it's easiest to sit on a coast. You can sit other places, but you need to be in a very flat spot. So today's fact of the day is that dark blue belt that looks like a shadow at sunrise or sunset is indeed the Earth's shadow reflecting off our atmosphere. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Mondays. A public holiday? It's Easter Monday. A public holiday. So it wasn't Easter at the time. It wasn't Easter in 2004 but it was on the 5th of April 2004 that Fletch and I started working together.

How many years ago was that? 17. Nuts. Do you know why this struck me over summer? I was just talking to this lady. She was so lovely. It was in Tauranga. She was like, I've been listening. I remember when you started working with Fletch

and she's like, how I remember is I was pregnant with this guy and there's this adult looking at me and I'm like, how old is he? He's like a 17 year old.

But he's like, he was a, like he wasn't, granted he was one of those 16 to 17 year olds that you would have got to buy booze for you back in the day

because he was like big and he had like a little moustache coming in. That's unfair. The police always choose those kind of guys for their stings. For their sting operations. Because I'd always fall for that if I worked in a booze store. Yeah, totally.

I'd be like, he's got a moustache. He can't be 16. 17 years ago, I was 14 years old. I was in my second year of high school. I was a goth who would wear kilts and fishnets. You would have loved our afternoon pop radio program. Yeah, I don't think. Panic at the disco.

Safe to say I didn't really listen to you guys back then, but 17 years. Hey, I'm just looking up the, you know how there's an anniversary gift for each anniversary, like silver or diamond. Yeah, I don't think there'll be gifts. 17 years is furniture.

Furniture. Well, I'm actually looking for a bedside table. Maybe that would be a good idea. A bedside table? Maybe that would be a good idea. I could build a bedside table. I didn't know. I wasn't asking you to build one.

I wanted you to buy one. It's a gift. What day is the actual anniversary? Monday. I could build you a bedside table. Oh, my God. Why don't you each... One piece of wood.

Because I've got... So, ages ago, we had a tree cut down. Yeah. It's this, it was a Japanese something. I love this. He said, I'm going to leave a big chunk of the trunk because you can get it, you know, those chainsaw mills where they'll come out and they'll cut the wood up for you on the spot. He's like, it's a beautiful wood. All right.

So, what, I'm not going to do that, though, but I'm going to take my chainsaw, like at the National Field Days when they take a tree trunk and with a chainsaw they make a bedside table. They make chairs and stuff. Like an occasional table. I could make you a table using my chainsaw this week. What a fun project. What's it going to look like?

Is it a light wood or a dark wood? Don't be ungrateful. It's not a custom order. It's a gift. I'm just saying that I can't have a light wood furniture with my dark... I can stain it dark. It's far easier to stain a light wood dark than a dark wood light. I'm not being unappreciative. I'm just saying... I think

this is lovely. If you guys do each other a little 17th anniversary gift, which is furniture, you're going to do a bedside table. What are you going to do over the weekend? I'm not... Why am I all of a sudden, I'll buy. Because this is a solid relationship that has lasted a very long time.

17 years. A beautiful bond. I don't know how you're still friends. I've been here for about two months and I'm sick of you both already. I know, it's a miracle. 17 years,

you could just, it doesn't have to be, you're not as, you're not as hands on. Do you want a spice rack? Do you need a spice rack? No, we've got a spice drawer. Oh, you can't put your spices in a drawer.

They've got to be on a rack. No, no, they're in a drawer. There's a custom insert in the drawer, so they all lay down, label up, and you can see exactly what you need. Sounds inconvenient to me. Alphabetical. It is so wildly convenient.

Every time you're cooking, you've got to stop what you're doing, put your tools down, and open a library of herbs and spices. Yeah, the drawer might hit you in the hip. So now you're mad. Well, you can go to the front of the row because there's multiple rows. You can be like, I'm already up to H for herbs.

Oh, I know what I'll make you. Some wooden coasters. Is that furniture? I'll accept decor. Can this be any furniture? That's home. That's home. Yeah.

Any furniture. I'll just go to Kmart and get you something. Oh, I suppose so. Yeah, it doesn't say you have to make it. Shardo wants a coffee table. You can buy me a coffee table. Buy me a nice coffee table. I'm not going to buy you a...

What, you've got a design warehouse? What do you do with your money? Screw it away? Yeah. What if you're dying and you never get to buy me a coffee table? You have kids or a partner. It's a terrible time to be keeping money in the bank. Interest rates are so low.

You're going to have to think of something because Vaughan is going to sweat blood and tears into a log of beautiful Japanese tree. Okay, well, come Tuesday, I will have a furniture gift for you. Great. I'm going to go and shuffle my chainsaw. Leave it with me. Happy anniversary, guys.

My neighbours are going to love this. Thank you. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, it was on last night, the Kiwi Bank New Zealander of the Year. It's a pretty big honour, isn't it? Well, it only happens once a year. And only one person gets it.

This award is specifically a New Zealander as well. Yeah. Very exciting. And of course, the ultimate winner, Dr Susie Wines. Congratulations. How do you feel, the ultimate winner, Dr. Susie Wines. Congratulations. How do you feel? Oh, really mixed feelings. I feel that it's a big, heavy weight.

I feel like you've already done all the heavy lifting. Now you've got the award. You don't need to worry about it anymore. What feels weird about it is that, you know, of all years, this is like the year that everybody deserved it because we've all played our part. And then obviously we've got people who play a bigger part, like all our essential workers and all the people working in MIQ.

So I sort of feel like it's, yeah. I'm sorry, I'm not used to this incomprehensible. Like it or not, you're the team representative. Yeah, that's it. Take it that way. I mean, my lab often refer to me as their mascot, so I guess that's how I feel. Representative sounds slightly more grown-up and adult-ish

than mascot. But you should have heard you as doctor. That's fine. Doctor mascot. How much, because we spoke to you early on in the pandemic. How much has your life changed in the last year? Like do people, when they see you, are they like, oh, shit, I haven't scanned in?

Yes. Yes, lots of people when I enter somewhere and scan will get up and go and scan. And I find that people wash their hands for a lot longer while I'm around. You are hard to miss with the pink hair. So I think this is why you're the mascot. I mean, team representative.

If I came out of the cubicle of a bar or something and I was washing my hands as I do for a quick four seconds of water, I've got eczema. And then you came out, I wouldn't stop washing until you had washed, dried and left. Your hands would be raw,

your eczema would be flared and you'd be like, flared off. Yeah, I'm sorry that you, your eczema would be flared and you'd be like, Fususie! Flared off. The good of the nation. Yeah, I'm sorry that you've got eczema. That's fine, it's healing. It's healing quite nicely.

And it's been really hard, right? Yeah, the whole washing hands for 20 seconds. It's a long time. Yeah. It's like, oh, how many times do I have to sing happy birthday again? Oh, I know. So how did you celebrate? Obviously, there was the big, the ceremony.

Yeah, well, it didn't finish till like 11.30 last night. So I went home, went to bed. That's what I did. Wild. I know. Well, it was a long evening. It starts at sort of 6.30 or so because there are lots of other awards. So there's been lots of other amazing people.

There's a young New Zealander of the year. There's a Young New Zealander of the Year. There's an Older New Zealander of the Year. There's all sorts. There's an Older New Zealander. When do you head to that? Because maybe morning, that's where you... Oh, I think it's like Masters. What are you looking this for?

No, that's like a 65 plus, right? It's like a Masters Games level. Did you know? So when you got invited, did you know? Or were you just like, this is weird, I'm being invited to this ceremony? Or did you know or were you just like this is weird i'm being invited to the ceremony oh no so the way so the way it works is they um they put uh there's a there's a short list of 10 finalists so you find out so several months ago they're like hi suzy you're a finalist for new zealand of the year and it's like oh no sorry a semi-finalist it's like oh okay and that's when

they kind of say do you want to accept the nomination? So I said, sure. And then a few months later, they say, right, well, we've whittled that list of 10 down to three and you're now a finalist. And then you don't find out until the evening when they, you know, open the envelope and call out the names. And you're joining a list of renowned people. Last year was Jennifer Ward-Leland. Yeah. Does so much for the arts.

We've had Mike King. Does a lot for, again, the arts and mental health. Taika Waititi, Richie McCaw, Stephen Tindall. That's hilarious that I've won the same award as Richie McCaw. When you became a microbiologist, were you like, me and an all-black, we're going to have something in common one day? Ironically, because I do a lot of work with Cure Kids, so Cure Kids have been funding a lot of my research for the last few years,

and they're the official charity of the All Blacks. So I actually have met some of the All Blacks and was sort of, we were like, do you want to come do some science? It was quite funny. You're a full-blown celeb now. Look at you, winning awards, hanging out with you are you um have you had the vaccine yet the first dose or any of them are you going to be like no as i say i'm not an essential person so i'm no i'm in i'm in the i'm in the back of the queue when everyone else gets theirs i mean if i if if

it will help for people to see me get it then then I'm really happy to do that in public, but I will get mine when it's my turn. I heard it really makes your arm heavy. For some people, what you have to remember is that it's basically getting your immune system activated. And so actually, if you feel something, that's a really good thing. That's your body responding.

I get the flu jab every year and you get a bit of a... It's just a dead arm, isn't it? It's fine. Someone's. That's your body responding. Because I get the flu jab every year and you get a bit of a, it's just a dead arm, isn't it? It's fine. And then someone's got to punch you in it. Yeah, it's just your cells doing their job. And sometimes it's a little bit worse for the second jab,

but again, that's a really good thing. Although if you don't hurt, that's also not a sign that your body isn't responding. So don't panic either way, basically. Just get it. I want to clarify this because this was over summer,

so it's going back a little bit now. But somebody said to me, how much does it cost to get, like, for an example, how much does it cost to get Susie Wiles to come into studio and talk about this? And I was like, what? No. And they were like, oh, I just assumed she was getting paid by media outlets to come in and give her opinion.

I was like, no, no, no, no. We don't pay for any interviews. Yeah, I would be very, very rich if I was paid for every interview I've done. I think a lot of people don't know. You actually didn't financially benefit out of the pandemic. No. Well, I have. So I do, if people can afford it, I do charge to give longer talks.

Right. But that's like a lecture. You're a doctor. That's what doctors do, right? Yeah, well, and I use that money to support my research, so to help my students do their experiments and stuff, so I don't feel guilty about that

at all. No, no. But yeah, a lot of people seem to think that I'm paid every time they see me on TV, and it's like, no. Should we do a give-a-little for Susie? You know? She'll probably spend it all on science. She won't even spend it on herself. Ironically, actually, so this is a little uncomfortable, but I've been thinking for the last few months,

I really need to do another crowdfunding drive because I've got this amazing project. It's all about how bacteria evolve to become more infectious and we can't get it funded any other way. And I'm like, oh, if I launch it now, everyone's going to go, see, she was in it for the money. Anyway, we may well launch that because that research really needs funding. But it's a weird thing.

I was thinking more just for you to have a holiday. No, that's what I'm saying. She'll spend it all on science. We want her to spend it on herself. She'll spend it all on science. Trying to make the world a healthier place. I'll just buy another board game. Dr. Susie Wiles.

More Lego. Congratulations. So exciting and so well-deserved. Kiwi Bank New Zealander of the Year, thank you so much for coming in again, Susie Wiles. More Lego. Congratulations. So exciting and so well-deserved. Kiwi Bank New Zealander of the Year, thank you so much for coming in again, Susie. My pleasure.