ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 1st October 2020

Episode Date: October 4, 2020

Aussie Bogan Baby names for 2020  New Borat Movie  Top 6: Things Paramedics Need  Where've you never been?  Megans Baby Diary!  Radio Tinder: Meet Rowan...  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fletch Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to McCafe Coffee for great tasting barista-made coffee on the go. Now, we're about to take off to Christchurch for our Bangers Bingo Tour. And as you'll hear in the podcast, I'll have some trouble checking in for my flight. That still hasn't resolved itself? No, I've just checked in now. Oh, now for security, the session's timed out. Three of us haven't been able to check in, and I want to know why.

Maybe the only person going is Vaughn, which I'm all right with, to be honest. They've seen the big guns. They've seen the big guns. I'm just looking. Yeah, no, see, I've got a text message. It's like, click here and look, there's my boarding pass. I'm fine. Handy.

But I tell you what this boarding pass doesn't include. Room for your knees. So that's still going to be a problem. What the hell? It said you're not checked in now. I shut down that boarding pass, and now it's shown me integrated features of Snapchat. And I haven't had Snapchat open for a very long time.

Oh, weird. Okay. That's weird. Why did it do that? Should we all just wait until you figure out your phone grade, Dad? Yeah, well, I'm checked in, so I've got a few minutes to burn. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleeche.

Morning, Megan. What a fiery leaders debate. Last night. Wasn't it just? We were just talking about when Patty asked if she wanted to be, if Judith wanted to be on the cover of Vogue. She said, oh, absolutely. I'd love to.

Any politician tells you otherwise, they're lying. Vogue. She wants to be on Vogue. It was very entertaining. Yeah. I didn't see a lot of it, but it felt like Patrick wanted to be in the debate rather than moderating

a debate. I felt like he was too involved. I was like, shush, Petty! It's hard for a moderator because otherwise they just wah on and don't answer the questions. Yeah, but there's one thing to stop each other interrupting, but he jumped right in and got involved in the debate. Well, if you watched the US presidential debate

yesterday, any of it, it was certainly way more civilised compared to the US debate. Our one. Oh, I was going to say the US presidential debate yesterday, any of it, it was certainly way more civilised compared to the US debate. Yeah. Oh, I was going to say the US one wasn't, was it? No. Would you shut up, man? It was a dumpster fire. That was the Joe Biden asked.

Biden called Trump a clown a couple of times, I think. Yeah. It was buck wild out there, guys. 2020. 2020. Well, Megan, you're having a baby. Yes, sir. And we've found a list that could help you because have you got a name in mind?

Yes. She's had a name in mind before there was a baby, right? You've had the name for years. Yeah, yeah. Well, today on the show, Megan's Baby Diary, a segment where you're going to just reveal I guess talk about the pregnancy.

But today, you're going to reveal to us it's genitals. Feels weird when you say that. A genitals reveal party. I'm going to be so careful that I don't put my foot in it.

I want to reveal it At the time Not stupidly beforehand Okay Right you are You've done very well That's later on in the show Are we going to set a forest on fire?

With a smoke grenade? I think we've probably had enough of that in 2020 You should set that pine forest By your place on fire Stop your hay fever And be like Oh what a shame Enough of that in 2020. Should set that pine forest by your place on fire. Stop your hay fever. Stop your hay fever. And be like, oh, what a shame. Breathing.

By the way, we're having a... We'll find out later. But next on the show, we thought we'd help you out with the names. These are... I've got a list of the most bogan Australian baby names. So baby names to avoid, but also I think would have never been on your list at all ever. Are you sure? You sure she is from Nelson? I was a bogan in a past life.

Oh, look, there's two or three on there that could be a real hat down the Nelson pub. Imagine if you say one and Megan just goes quiet and she's like... I'd beckited the train. The top six is coming up as well. Yeah. You may have seen those.

I call them Iron Man suits, like those jet packs. Yeah. They're on the back, but also on the hands to be able to fly. Paramedics have been armed with them to get to isolated spots or like up dodgy terrain that helicopters can't get to to be first responders. I know. God, I should have become a paramedic, except I don't like needles.

Or blood or vomit. Or blood or guts. Or open wounds. Open wounds. People crying. Responsibility. Cleaning up ambulances. I hate that.

Oh yeah, I shouldn't be a paramedic. Just looking after people in general. Do you ever clean up an ambulance or is that just a thought? He just thinks it would be awful. I just imagine that would be an awful part of the job. Wipe all the surfaces. Okay. You know that thing where you just shut the door

and push self-clean and it just goes... Yes. Like a dishwasher. A thing comes up from the floor and just starts violently spinning. Yeah. It's a good idea. It's a good idea.

Self-clean ambulance. Well, we've got paramedics with jetpacks. So the top six pieces of kit our first responders need. Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast. ZM. Well, kidspot.com.au has released Australia's baby bag and baby names for 2020. And this is perfect, Megan, because you're having a baby in January.

Yeah. And one of these could be perfect. Now, these are alphabetical. Okay. Alphabetical. Are these names people have actually called their kids? Yeah, they're ones that they've registered on, I guess, their version of births, deaths, marriages.

Right. Okay. And this is alphabetical. So B, this is for girls. B, bushfire. No, I'm only kidding. Oh, my God. I was about to unleash.

I'm only kidding. Karen, but with a C and two R's and a Y. A lot of these. C-A-R-R-Y-N. Yeah, a lot of these are trashy spelling, eh? The names. It doesn't matter because when you say it, it's still Karen. But disguising Karen as Karen doesn't fool anyone.

That's exactly right. But also I hate it when parents do that and you see someone's name and it's like that, like Karen, but then that kid is going to have to spend their entire life explaining the different spelling of their name and the extra R's and letters. It's just like, oh. Trash. Don't hold back. The next one is wine inspired. So there's been, you know, Chardonnays. Shiraz has been on the baby name radar.

Medium white. Sauvignon. There is a wine called Chablis. Chablis? C-H-A-B-L-I-S, French Chablis. But, and it's spelt Chablis, but it is said Chablis. Chablis? Chablis. Baby Chablis.

Please, can you name your baby Chablis? I know you're revealing the gender later this morning, but Char Bliss. I think that could go boy or girl. Char Bliss. Oh, it's unisexual. Unisexual. Corona is on the list.

Not even kidding. You're not. Yep. They said while we're talking about the pandemic, there was COVID, there was lockdown, and there was sanitizer. But those were in different countries, not Australia. But those are some babies

that have been born 2020. Oh my God. Sanitizer. How do you get sanitizer? Hi, I'm sanitizer. Sani for short. Oh, that's not better. No, it's not any better.

Yeah. Wow. Call them Han and their middle name's Sanitizer. Yeah. Han Sanitizer. And then that works better than Sanitizer as a first name. Graceland, as in Elvis' house.

Graceland is another name. Honesty, but honest. And then E-E on the end. Honesty. This is a boy's name, Jezebel. Okay. Jezy? Yeah.

Because Jezebel, That's like A biblical way Of calling somebody The S word Yeah Yeah okay But this has got The double Z The double L

Of course it does Of course Jinx There's a baby Boy in Australia With the name Jinx Okay Sorry

Girl Girl Any of these Tickling your fancy I mean Not really Jumel It's a French word Girl. Any of these tickling your fancy? I mean, not really. Jumel, it's a French word and it means twin girl. Jumel.

That's not that bad. Chloe, except it is spelled K-L-O-W-E-E. Chloe. Like a seven-year-old would spell Chloe if you asked them to spell Chloe and they've never seen Chloe before. There's been a girl called Pistol. Wow.

Yep. The lads, Axe. There's one called Axe. Of course there is. There's Bamboo. There's another. I feel like people are looking out the window into the garden when they're naming their babies in Australia.

I'm going to take that axe and I'm going to chop down that bamboo. Next on the show, we're going to eat lollies. Our segment, Yummy Yummy. There's a brand new lolly in town. ZM. 20 past six, that's good. Well, 17 past, it's early enough for lollies.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Yummy Yummy is our segment where we discover a new yummy, yummy food. It's generally like sweet things, isn't it? Yep. New ice creams, new biscuits, new anything yummy, yummy. And often they are overseas and we're like, oh, fingers crossed it'll come here. This is here. And I have it in my hands.

And we're going to try lollies at 621. Lollies. These are vegan lollies. It's 6.21. Lollies. These are vegan lollies. Born space. Normal lollies have gelatin, right? Yep. Which is an animal product. Right.

Use every part. That's my slogan. Waste not one. I use every part of the. How is it going to give itself up? You may as well. I don't think. I use every part of the... How is... The animal's going to give itself up. You may as well use... I don't think they have a choice. Walk into the shed with their hooves up and like...

Yeah. Here it goes. Don't leave these out. How do they make gelatin? Do we want to say? There was an old way they used to melt. They used to melt various parts of animals, but including like the hoofed areas.

Oh, don't tell me that. I love marshmallows. Yeah, there you are. And lollies. Yeah. Okay, well, should we try these? Yeah, these are the Natural Confectionery Company. They have vegan.

Oh, they're the ones that do the sour worms. Well, they do a whole range of. I know, the dinosaurs. I ate the dinosaurs a lot too. They also, they colour them with spirulina and turmeric and stuff. Spirulina. What do they colour with spirulina? The lollies.

These new lollies? Yeah. Don't come in here tricking me into eating spirulina. Turmeric and paprika. But green lollies are always my favourite lollies. I'm trying the blackcurrant. Well, you can try a green one. I'm going to try a green one.

That would go to... They're a little bit... They're quite soft, but... They're small. It honestly just tastes like a lolly. They're small lollies. Yeah, no, they're fine. They just taste like a lolly.

I was expecting it to taste like plants or something. It's still got sugar in it. Yeah, there's still... Oh, does it? All's still got sugar in it. Yeah, it does. All right, I'll keep going. But see, I would buy that and think it doesn't have any sugar and that it's really good for me. You'd be like, this is better for me. Yeah, my dudes.

Way better for me. It's got not only sugar in it, it's got three different types of sugar in it and they're all the top ingredients. Yum. That makes a good lolly. It makes a good lolly. Cane sugar.

What's invert sugar? That's the sugar that stays home and doesn't want to socialise. Extroverted sugar is the one you see at the clubs and the loud ones at parties. Oh, that's glucose syrup, right? That's the extroverted sugar. That's the next one.

There's some Fickner. Yeah. Okay. Well, if they can make it without animal products, maybe we should all. That's good. It's good that vegans can have a good lolly too, because I can't imagine they've got a lot of lolly selection.

Like, I've never gone to the supermarket and seen, like, vegan lollies. Have you? No, but I don't know what to look for. There probably are. There's only four greens in the entire bag. The apple. Does it taste like apple? You've got to work on.

That's a work on. Okay. For them. Yeah. Do you ever, when you buy lollies at the supermarket, if you see like yellow or like the yuck flavours, do you always keep looking for another bag? Yeah, you pick up the bag and you shake it.

Yellow's universally the worst, right? I know, it is. There's a tonne of yellow in here. I know, there always is. Why do they do that? I don't know. I always like find a bag and I'm just like, yep, that one. Like licorice or all sorts. I'm like, no, too many yellows in this.

Yeah. I want the greens. The reds. The pinks. Yeah, exactly. 624, next on the show. Yeah, those are good. I haven't.

Yeah, real stuck in the teeth though. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Holy moly, it was. 2006. 2006. Borat, cultural learnings of America to make benefit glorious nation of Kazakhstan. Wow, wow, wow. These are very nice.

Oh, it's been long enough that we can have a lower there. Is it? It's like Austin Powers, right? It's on the full loop. No. Oh, come on, guys. Let me have this one. I really want Austin Powers to do the full loop

so we can enjoy it non-ironically again. How many people wore a Borat bikini to the sevens or just on a stag do? What was it called? Mankini. Mankini. Was it the Borat Mankini? Yeah.

Yeah, wow. And then, of course, everybody quoted it and I feel like we've just reached a point now where they're not quoting it, right? Nobody says, very nice. Oh, my God. If they did, you'd be like, really? Imagine you're on a date with someone and they're like, very nice.

The dinner turns up on the table. Very nice. And then they follow that up with a neck minute. You're like, oh. We've stopped that now, right? My sister. You'd be like, no. So this has all been done secretly.

I think we talked in the latest about somebody spawning him driving on an LA freeway like a month ago or two months ago. Yeah. Well, it's going to be out before the election on Amazon Prime, the follow-up to the first Borat movie. How does he get away with that? Because is he Borat again? Yes, yes. We've all seen the movie.

Speculated at this stage, it will be released on Amazon under the title Borat, Gift of Pornographic Monkey to Vice Premier Michal Pence to make benefit recently diminished nation of Kazakhstan. Where he shot that village was actually in Romania. Romania. And they hated it. Because he did it under the guise of... And they didn't speak English.

Right. No. So he didn't get away with it, Megan. And apparently in early July, Rudy Giuliani called the police on him after an interview where Sacha Baron Cohen was in character as Borat. Yeah. Because he did that show This Is America last year, which was, it was, there were some really incredible bits.

Some super smart, like, well-played, absolutely ridiculed people. Yeah, and they had no idea who dressed up in, like, different characters and you'd never even recognise them. And parts of that were just brilliantly done. So I'm thinking it's going to take more of a He's going to go

for some Republicans I think. In Olympia, Washington posing as a sponsor of a far right event and he led the crowd in a racially charged singalong. Rui Giuliani told police

that this guy comes running in wearing a crazy what I would call a pink transgender outfit. It was a pink bikini with lace. Wow. So it's going to be on Amazon Prime and they're saying before the election, which will be this month. Yeah. That's

crazy. I would love to sit down with Sacha Baron Cohen. He would have some stories just from all these movies. Because I read articles when he was Ali G about how he would trick people in those interviews. So a lot of people thought he was setting up the camera and there'd be a guy in a

suit in the chair and the politicians would be like, well, this is who's interviewing me. And then at the last minute, he swaps, sits down and does the interview and they're just like, what's happening here? Was it Jonathan Ross? He had a chat with him about how he said it and he said it always before the interview and they're just like, what's happening here? Yeah, I saw, was that Jonathan Ross? He had a chat with him about how he said,

and he said he'd always, before the interview started, ask some really stupid just day-to-day questions. Yeah. And that would be like, oh, they'd be like, oh, this guy's ridiculously stupid.

Yeah. And then the interview would start so the questions weren't as stupid as what they'd been asked pre-interview, so it didn't seem as bad. Right. He said his favourite one was with Borat when he first

walked into a house he would say, before I start I need to make shit. And they'd just be so confused and it would set this ground for them being like, if a guy walks into your house and the first thing he asks to do is make a shit, like, nothing can be crazier

so then that's why everything else seemed relatively normal wow he's a very clever guy ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan the podcast

from the ZM Think Tank this is the top six hello there if you're in the UK Lake District hello but also keep an eye out because you might have Hello there. If you're in the UK Lake District, hello. But also keep an eye out because you might have a flying paramedic inbound. This is like a jet suit.

And the Lake District is massive for, it's, how do I describe it? Is there lakes? Yep, there's some lakes. There's lots of mountains and lots of tracks to go walking. It looks beautiful. I've always seen it in like TV shows and stuff. Yeah, imagine like a hilly area but there's grass and there's sheep

and there's like those walls made of stones. Yep. And that sort of thing. Hadrian's Wall goes through there. Hadrian's Wall. It's like a real low budget version of the Great Wall of China. Went across. Arian's Wall. It's like a real low-budget version of the Great Wall of China. Went across the globe. A really budget version.

But old people think, I'll be able to do that. And then they get up there, sprain an ankle, have a heart attack, and then it takes ages to hike in. So paramedics with jetpacks is a real option. They've got a whole lot of kit on their back, and they've got like the Iron Man repulsors on their hands

and they can like fly up there. It's being trialled. If you've got some time today, give it a Google because the footage is pretty cool. Also, lols in summer if they jetpack in and start a scrub fire when they land with their jet engine. Yeah, it doesn't look... He's got them like right on his hands. It doesn't look hot. I don't know what's jet engines. Yeah, it doesn't look. He's got them, like, right on his hands.

It doesn't look hot. I don't know what's going on. Yeah, right. But it looks pretty cool. But if we're talking about upgrading the paramedics, I've got the top six pieces of kit that our first responders could use. Oh, St. John's. Yeah.

Okay. Number six. Now, this is a long shot, but stay with me. So paramedics, if there's trouble and it's not anywhere near their base, they get into a van and the van has lights so that they can be like, I'll turn on my lights and people will be like,

oh, it's the paramedics, they'll get out of the way. And if they don't see the lights, it's also got a siren. Interesting. Okay. And so people can see them and hear them and be like, oh, that's it, that's the important. Yeah, right. Okay. And we'll need to also make the vans quite bright. Okay. And so people can see them and hear them and be like, oh, that's it. That's the important. Okay. And we'll need to also make the vans quite bright.

Okay. And also have written on the front of them, ambulance, but backwards. Okay. So you can see it. So you can see it in your rear view mirror. Yeah, right. Like Mr. Whippy. Yes. Who should have that thing?

The exact same thing, except it says ice cream. Yep. That's just a thought. Well, I know I'm a dreamer. Okay. Yeah. But you can't hold the dreamers back. Number five on the list of the top six pieces of kit

our first responders need. You know when someone has a bleeding bit? Yep. And, you know, like anywhere. Something bleeding. You imagine like you're bleeding on the arm, the head, the leg. Imagine having a long but thin piece of cloth that you could wind around the bleeding bit

to stop the bleeding. Fascinating. And how it works is... Pressure. No, the blood's like, well, I can't get out there. I'll stop trying. Okay. Right, okay.

But it's cloth. It sounds like that could work. Yeah. Yeah, good, okay. Seems simple, like it should have been done before. All the best ideas are, Megan. Number four on the list of the top six pieces of kit our first responders need. Have you ever seen someone struggling for breath?

Yeah. I can't breathe. And then you can't stand their blowing air into their lungs all day. I say we give the paramedics tanks of air compressed. Okay. So lots can fit in there. And you put a mask on the face and then that air goes into the mask so it makes it easier for them to breathe.

It's genius. I think I'm doing okay. Number three on the list of the top six pieces of kit our first responders need. Sometimes I'm like, who's the paramedic here? Wouldn't it be easier if they were all wearing clothing that looked the same? Like a school uniform, but not for school. Yeah, okay. And it could have pockets.

Yeah, for all their scissors and stuff. Scissors? What are they? Sounds like another great thing that they could possibly use. Okay. Number two on the list of the top six pieces of kit our first responders need. Have you guys seen CPR? You know where they're like, go, push, push, push.

Imagine if there was a machine that could restart the heart with electricity. It's mad. Stay with me. Sure. Gets the heart going again, and then they don't have to... Great idea. ...stay alive on the chest for so long. It's futuristic.

It's maybe a little far-fetched, but one day. And number one on the list of the top six pieces of kit our first responders need if the van can't get somewhere. For example, over water. Yeah. I've invented, over water. Yeah. I've invented a flying machine. Okay. You get into the flying machine, but it's not like a plane.

It doesn't need a long straight runway to take off on. It starts a blade spinning above it, which effectively acts like four wings with the downward pressure, but they spin around on the spot, allowing for vertical lift. Right. And then would they just like winch into places? A what? You're on board.

You sound like an ideas guy. You sound like an ideas guy. It is going to be expensive though. Okay. Luckily, banks have lots of money. We'll ask them to put their name on the side. Of the flying machine. And then when we're talking about the

flying machine, we can say the bank's name. Great idea. For example, the ANZ flying machine. With winch. Or the Westpac rescue. Would that work?

Westpac is a bank and they are rescuing people. The Westpac rescue a bank. Yeah, it's a bank. And they are rescuing people. Yeah, they could do their own. The Westpac Rescue Flying Machine. Coming to a sky near you. It's a great idea, Vaughan. I'm full of them. That's today's top six. So it's been revealed that the average parent is no better at maths or science than a sixth grader.

So that is around 11 or 12 years old. So they take, once they get to that age, they take their maths and science than a sixth grader. So that is around 11 or 12 years old. So they take, once they get to that age, they take their maths and science home and they're like, Mum, Dad, can you help me?

I remember the age of getting to the point where my parents were like, we need to like, if we're going to do this, we need to sit down. I don't remember ever

getting into that. God, and they wouldn't have been able to Google either. They would have had to get out the CD-ROM with encyclopedia thingy on it. Britannica.

And Carta. And Carta, yeah. Carta 95. Carta 95 wouldn't have had your answers. Probably not, no. Yeah, I'd say it would be younger than that for me because I've forgotten everything.

Well, I just use a calculator. I'm not even good at timestamp. Yeah, exactly. Maths was my worst subject at school. I'd just sit at the table with them and have the calculator under the desk and be like, what did you say?

Six times 12. Well, we have tasked Executive Intern Anya. Good morning, Miss Anya. Good morning, Miss Anya. Hello, everyone. Sit up straight, fold your arms and pull up your socks. You've got three maths. Now, these are from grade?

Six. Six. Yep. So 11, 12-year-old math questions. Yes. Are you ready for question one? I'll get my pen ready. Okay.

Test us. Question one. If Alex has 855 donut holes... What are donut holes? Just donuts. They're those little ones, aren't they? I don't have a pen. Wait, so he's got...

He's got, like, large donuts with a hole in the middle. No, they're little donuts. Donut a bit out of the middle. They're those little ones, aren't they? I didn't have a pen. Wait, so he's got like large donuts with a hole in the middle. No, they're little donuts. Donut holes are like the little... Just say donuts then, okay? Oh, okay. Alex has 800. Sorry, I was imagining the hole in the middle. I'm a miss, I don't have a pen.

Vaughan, we've talked about this. More organisation, please. Why not your computer? Okay, he's got 855 donuts. Holes. Did you say 855? Yeah, 855. Good start. Wait, who's got

the donut holes? Alex. Jesus, okay. I'm starting from the top. If Alex has 855 donut holes. Well, does he or not? He does! Well, you said F. Just feel like he cares. And miss? Oh my god, silence please. Is it better in English, miss? This Silence, please. He's a better English miss.

Is this a hypothetical? That's a lot of donut holes, too. What are you doing with that many donut holes? Alex currently has. It shouldn't be that high a number. If we're doing that high a number, it should be something more relative to having that high a number. It's not good for you.

I hope they're sharing. Yeah, does Alex want type 2 diabetes? No. I'm going to have a school wine. Okay. And we all know the teachers have school wine. And your pump bottle. Okay. Sweet Jesus. Okay. And school v know the teachers have school wine. And your pump bottle. Sweet Jesus.

And school vodkas. And if he gives each of his friends nine donut holes. How many friends does he have? Nine donut holes. How many friends can he feed? Vaughan, if you let me finish the question, you might have a chance at getting a grade. So I have to divide that by nine. I'm out.

I don't know how to do that. Am I not like a calculator? No, that's not how that's... But miss, in my grown up life, I'll always have a chance at getting a grade. So I have to divide that by nine. I'm out. I don't know how to do that. Am I not like a calculator? No, that's not how that's... But miss, in my grown-up life, I'll always have a calculator with me. Yeah, remember that old thing? You won't always have a calculator. Be like, I'd love to go back to 95 and be like, I would like to introduce you, the iPhone.

Give me... 855. Do you want multi-choice? This guy, I want to see what French just said. He got in his calculator and he bought 855 minus 9. Not divided by 9. He can't feed that many people. And then I was like, it's divided by...

No, I don't even know how to work that out. Okay, Miss, next question. No, you do that, curve the bracket with a little line and you put 9 there and nine there and 855, and then how many times does it go into that remainder and then that? They're asking too much of our 11-year-olds. Okay, all right. Shall we move on to question two?

Nine, nine, 18. Wait, do you want to know the answer? What comes after 18? Okay, tell me the answer. 95. 21, 22, 23, 24. Fletch, you got it right. He used a calculator.

I'm up to three nines. Megan. Seven, 24. Fletch, you got it right. He used the calculator. I'm up to three nines. Megan. Seven, 28. I'm sorry, but it's too late. Okay. Did you get that right? Yeah, but you go nine because nine into 85. Yeah, but I don't know that.

But nine goes into 90 ten times, but it's not quite that. But it's nine, so the first one's nine. Oh, well, you didn't tell me how to work it out. And then you've got a remainder of four, so then you've got four next. It's 45, it's nine. So the first one's nine. Oh, well, you didn't tell me how to work it out. And then you've got a remainder of four. So then you put four next, it's 45. And then nine goes into 45 five times. Teacher's falling asleep.

That's 95. I'm falling asleep. Stop being a smartass, Paul. Okay, we're out of time. So that means Fletch is the winner. Is that right? I believe so, unfortunately. And that was not only a lesson in maths,

but also a lesson in how to delay your teacher enough To not learn anything in a maths class ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast Today I didn't make sure I was able to talk Before I tried to start That was the voice equivalent of standing up

After you've been sitting down for a long time And your legs aren't ready And you're like That's why they call you Vaughan Smith Broadcasting Professional. Vaughan Smith, always prepared broadcasting professional.

We're off to Christchurch today. It's been a little while since I've been to the Garden City. It's certainly easy to check in on Jetstar, isn't it? Jesus. Still loading.

Wouldn't leave me checking. I have to do it at the airport. Good. Why is Vaughan allowed to check in but I'm not? Broadcasting the airport. Good. Why is Vaughan allowed to check in but I'm not? Broadcasting professional. Profiling.

Yeah. That's right. Megan's not allowed to check in either. She looks dodgy. Oh, yeah. You know, those upper class white women. Oh.

They're dangerous on a flight. Oh my God, you called me upper class. Thank you. Yeah, I don't know why I went with that. But, you know me upper class. Thank you. Yeah, I don't know why I went with that. But, you know, I did. We're flying to Christchurch and producer Jared's coming

and he just said before, I've never been to Christchurch before. This will be my first time. And I said, the hub of the South. The Garden City. Have you ever been to the South Island? I have. I've been to Queenstown and Dunedin.

Right. Okay, that's fair enough, I guess. But why not? I've never really had reason to. I'm sure it's lovely, but I don't know anyone there. My parents were never like, let's go on a holiday to Christchurch. Why did you go to Dunedin then? My mate was at Otago Uni, so we got pretty loose.

Righty-o. We all had one of those regretful trips that we're glad didn't end up on social media. Were you able to check in for that flight online? No, I wasn't. I'm ropeable. Did you go to the airport as well? Yeah.

Okay, we'll see you guys there, right? Just checking. But I thought this is pretty amazing. It's going to be great to like be with you while you're like seeing it for the first time yeah walking down Christchurch Boulevard

yes and then they need to rename this where would we take Jared and Christchurch that would be you would call Christchurch Boulevard

Manchester Street Avent yes he doesn't get that joke a lot of people don't know it was an interesting Boulevard. Manchester Street. Yes. He doesn't get that joke. Not a bit. He doesn't get it. It was an interesting street when the sun

went down. Manchester Street. Where'd you go punting on the Avon? Do you know what it still is? Because the last time I was in Christchurch to get a rental car,

I pulled in to Manchester Street and I was getting a message because I was meeting friends so I pulled over with texting because I didn't want to text and drive

and then there was a knock on the window scared the shit out of me and Manchester Street because I was meeting friends so I pulled over was texting because I didn't want to text and drive and then there was a knock on the window scared the out of me and Manchester Street I was like oh right it's Manchester Street yeah and going they're like silly you because are you interested I know and you were like oh honey you've got no idea down the street um I don't know. Yeah, I was thinking. It's going to be exciting. Yeah. For your first time.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. I want to take some calls this morning. And I know we've talked about this in the past. It was mostly, was it your nana who'd never been over? My nana, yeah, had never left the North Island. That's right. The first time she'd actually been over a body of water was to my wedding on Waiheke Island. Wow.

That's right. Yeah, yeah. That's nuts. And she was, yeah, 82 at the time. Wowzers. Yeah, 82 at the time. But I know there'd be like places in like New Zealand that people haven't been.

Like maybe, it took me ages to get to the West Coast because I don't know, you just kind of do the main areas, The West Coast is, you specifically go to the West Coast. Yeah, true. And it's beautiful when you specifically go to the West Coast. Yeah, true. And it's beautiful when you get there. It's amazing. It blows my mind when someone, say, from Auckland hasn't been to the South Island

or someone from the South Island hasn't been to, like, Wellington or Auckland. There'd be people from Auckland that haven't been south of the Bombays. I'd put money on it. I'd put money on the line. There would definitely be. Do you remember that? Like, it was actually quite a sad statistic of how many

school-aged kids live in Auckland that have never been to a beach. And Auckland is surrounded by water and they've never been to a beach. I think you were going to say to snow. I could imagine that. That number would be astronomically low. Wow. Do you know how expensive it is to get to the snow,

let alone do everything you want to do when you're there? Oh, totally. It's just so far out of people's price range. And the beach is so many. Yeah, I blew my mind how many Auckland school kids had never been to the beach. All right, well, I'll wait $800 at M9696. I reckon we open up the phone lines and take some calls. Yeah, where have you never been? And the closer to you, the better.

Like, imagine living in, in like Nelson, Marlborough and never having been to Wellington. No. It's just a nip across. It's painfully close. I know, but it's painfully close.

and didn't even tell their parents. They were just gone for a night and then nipped back. What? Did you go to Wellington? Oh, I didn't, but lots of people did. When they drive over to Picton.

Yeah. Ferry across. Have a weekend in Wellington and was like, oh, it's just at a friend's place. Loose. That's an ocean away.

Maybe you're listening and you've never been to the North Island and you live in the South Island or vice versa. Or yeah, you've just never been to a big city and people just can't believe it. This afternoon, you'll be strutting down Christchurch Boulevard like Tobey Maguire in Spider-Man 3, looking right plays of himself as he's enjoying his first time in Christchurch. Producer Jared revealed to us he's never been to the Garden City.

I've still got to check in at the airport. I've just tried again. Jetstar. Easy. This is really, this is Fletcher's worst nightmare. I just opened the email, clicked the link. Did Jetstar have an app? Got in

Do they have an app? Do they have an app? Aren't you a club Jetstar? You're a club member You're always wiring on about your club You're a past seven inch She's had enough Hello Jetstar ambassador speaking

Yes they have an app Can you check in on the app? You can check in on I think I'm 62% confident You can check in on the app Probably not me though, eh? Oh, Jesus. Why can't I check in?

You can have one complaint today. One complaint. Can it all be all Jetstar? Oh, my God. Can't help me. I hope I get bumped. You've got over 24 hours of this. Not today.

Nope. So, producer Jared, never been to Christchurch. And he might not actually because, because he can't chicken either. But regardless, we're talking about where you've never been. Yeah. The closer to you, the better. Also, like if you, for example, somebody said, I live in Southland. Hold on.

Did they text, have they? No, you're safe. This is a safe one. I live in Southland. I can see Stewart Island On a fine day Have done my whole life Never been See I've

I really You've been Amazing I only just stayed In the little Part that gets The weather shout out Oban

Okay The little settlement Amazing Beautiful Because I only ever see it When there's a whale stranding And it looks beautiful But very sad

Or some rambunctious Kiwis Are filmed Yes Running around being silly buggers Exactly because I only ever see it when there's a whale stranding and it looks beautiful but very sad. Or some rambunctious Kiwis are filmed running around being silly buggers. Exactly. So we'll take some calls. Dan, where have you never been? I've never been past Whangarei and I've never been past New Plymouth. So where do you live? I live in Kiwamuru.

Right. Wow, okay. So you've kind of been in that little radius and that's it. Yeah. You're missing out. Like far north is one of the most beautiful spots on the Bay of Islands. Stop it, Whangarei, you're doing yourself a disservice, aren't you? And if we look the other way, just south of New Plymouth, Whanganui. Oh, yeah, we heard they've got the giant pencil, Dan. One of the callers last week, yeah, they pencil sculpted it.

We've all got weekends booked booked And If I'm gonna notice The giant pencil Nicole Where have you never been? So I've lived in New Zealand For almost like 19 years On and off

And I live in Christchurch Okay And I've I've done all the South Island Even Stewart Island Oh wow And Auckland And Auckland

But I haven't ever been To Wellington Wow Okay Yeah And I I go I want to go to all the zoos In New Zealand't ever been to Wellington. Wow, okay. Yeah, and I want to go to all the zoos in New Zealand. I've been to pretty much only Christchurch and Auckland. I really want to go to the one in Wellington,

and I've just never been. Hamilton Zoo, if I could get a little plug in for my hometown zoo, Hamilton Zoo is an amazing zoo. Just being in Christchurch, could you give Producer Gerard a tip for Christchurch Boulevard? Oh, yeah. The boulevards are wonderful. See?

The boulevards are beautiful. Wonderful stuff. The boulevards have not broken trees. Hey, thanks for your call, Nicole. Kay, where have you never been? I have never been to the South Island. Oh, come on, Kay. Really?

It's my homeland. It's the mainland. Whereabouts do you live? I was born in Fedderston and then came up to Auckland at two years of age. Yeah. And I've been up north and I've only got as far as Wellington. My sister was born in the South Island. And you've never been, do you want to go?

Like, Queen sounds beautiful. I've thought about it. I hear about it on the news or the radio or whatever. I'd love to see all the old historic buildings and all that. It would be sad to hear about the earthquakes and that, but that's something that I'm not a part of. Wow. Well, don't skip nelson and tasman kate oh yeah beautiful beautiful and crush which boulevard as well okay you must go down the boulevard thanks kate thanks kate um liam where have you never never been uh i grew up in

wellington as a kid and moved to palmerston years ago. And in Wellington, I'd never been across the ferry or to Nelson or anything. Have you been to anywhere in the South Island? I just flew to Christchurch and that was it. But, oh, you've got to see the Inter-Irelander. If it was a Wellingtonian, you'd see the Inter-Irelander all the time. It'd be a temptress. Yeah, but you also see it when it's really rough. Yeah, you see it at its worst.

You do. Hey, Liam, thanks. You called some text really rough. Yeah, you see it at its worst. You do. Hey, Liam, thanks. You called some text messages. Someone said, I'm from Hamilton. To be fair, the only reason I've ever been to Christchurch in the South Island has been for chasing the D. Wow, I love the honesty. No judge.

Do you find that on the boulevard? There's everything on the boulevard. You've got your Ds, your As, your Bs, your Cs. Okay. Your EFG. Yeah. I know an 86-year-old who has lived in Invercargill and never been north of Gore, which is 45 minutes away.

So they spent their whole life living in Southland and have never been north of Gore. I have lived in Auckland my whole life and I've never been to Waiheke Island. Oh, you simply must. Get the girls together. Hit the vineyards. Maybe not Cable Bay because the neighbours are pissed at the moment, aren't they?

Oh, they're always pissed. Go on. Apparently someone's doing a brown eye. Get over it. Who's going to a winery? Wait, on the lawn they were doing a brown eye. I didn't hear this story. I always thought they had a problem with the noise.

No, it's everything. It's all the drunk shenanigans. You go there and you start off all classy and you have a lovely day in the library and then it all turns to shit if someone's doing a brown eye on the lawn. Well, you hope a brown eye doesn't turn to shit. You're getting the full view of life.

724 next on the show. A bit of a serious moment and something pretty cool. Sarah Gandy, broadcaster. We used to work with her here. And she has, with the help of the Breast Cancer Foundation, launched Change and Check. It's a campaign to help us check our boobs. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. ZM. Joining us in studio as she launches the Change and Check campaign. Sarah Gandy, good morning. Good morning, guys. This is something that you have launched with the Breast Cancer Foundation? Yeah, this is actually a campaign

that already exists in the UK, but I didn't want to just steal it because that felt rude. So I saw it online. It was a woman who is a breast cancer survivor in the UK who works for, if anyone knows Lorraine, the ITV morning show over there.

Yeah. So she's a producer on that show. She got breast cancer and then said to Lorraine, I want to do something. So they launched a campaign called Change and Check, which is stickers in changing rooms that show you the nine signs and symptoms of breast cancer. And all these women started coming forward saying I saw these stickers and now I'm in breast cancer treatment and I never would have done anything if I hadn't seen these stickers. Wow. Yeah.

So it saved their lives. Yes. So these stickers have all the different symptoms. I never knew half of these. Yeah, so nine symptoms sounds like a lot and I've been trying to commit them to memory now. Inversion. Nipple inversion, guys. Who even knew that was a thing?

Do you know what? I mean, for me, I found my breast cancer with a lump. Right. But in retrospect, I me, I found my breast cancer with a lump. Right. But in retrospect, I actually think I had some pain maybe months before I found the lump. And I just thought it was a weird body thing. Right. Because you know you have weird body things. Like similarly, a rash can be a sign of breast cancer.

And I think a lot of people would easily go, oh, it's a weird rash. Yeah. I've just got a weird skin thing. On the breast area. Yeah. If there was a rash. a weird skin thing. On the breast area, if there was a rash. Totally. And it can be the breast area above the breast, like your kind of clavicle, chest area, or also your armpit. Like when I went and was diagnosed, I actually had a lump in my armpit as well.

So it had gone to my lymph nodes. So it can, yeah, be in that armpit area as well. Right. So these are going to be in like changing rooms at the gym or like at the mall? Yes, anywhere. Anywhere, because the reality is people are really busy, right? People are running around, we're crazy. It's really easy to go, oh, breast cancer, yeah,

I could check my boobs. But the reality is that it's just the thing that gets thrown to the side. But when you're out trying on a top or a dress or something, you maybe have two minutes to yourself and you're standing in front of a mirror and you could quickly have a look, have a touch, do whatever. Or even if you just notice something on the sticker of boobs,

this wall of boobs that we're putting in front of people and go, oh, that colour change thing. I didn't know that the colour change. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That rash. Yeah. That I've been ignoring for two weeks now. Exactly. So, I mean, I think

88% of women under the age of 45 don't know the nine signs and symptoms. No, I didn't. I have no idea. Because lumps was always like. You just think of lumps. Yeah, lumps was always the number one, right? Yeah, yeah. And then the next thing is, if we go one in nine women in New Zealand get breast cancer, right? I think one in eight women have said they've found a lump and gone

nah, done nothing about it. Haven't gone to the doctor. And you know what? Let's not judge because when I found my lump, really it was only because a friend of mine who's a similar age had just had breast cancer and I thought, man, if I don't go to the doctor, Delaney will kill me. Because at

the time I found it, it was a couple of years ago, I was having panic attacks, I was going through some rough stuff at work. It wasn't in my head, I could have easily gone, I don't have time for this right now. Really easily. But it wasn't, it was just because of her, really, in the back, this little niggling voice that I was like,

I'm just going to go. And even my GP was like, I don't think it's anything, but we'll just put you through the process because I'd hate to be that doctor that didn't do anything and thank god she wasn't yeah yeah uh yeah but thank god she wasn't because one in six women never check um under 45 never check but I would be one of the people that say yeah I check but I'm counting like you have a shower and you're like yeah no it's all good well look if you feel like you know what

your boobs are supposed to feel like generally, so if you notice something different, that's a really good start I mean, the way to check properly is you start at your nipple, I mean this is how I do it, you start at your nipple, you go around a little koro around your boob and do that, and then you go up to your chest area and under your underarm and have a look

is the other thing, so it's not just touching it's looking as well. So the colour change and trying to do it around the same time of the month, every month, because your boobs change. Boobs are a real hoot. They're very confusing. Doing it in the shower with some shower gel, you know. I've often said boobs are a hoot.

Boobs are a hoot. Aren't they? That was my slogan for a few years. Do you find them confusing also? They can, yeah. Sometimes you think they're looking at you, but they're not. No, that happens a lot. Sometimes they're looking

in two different directions. I know. Yeah. And you don't know which one to look at. That took at least three minutes for the conversation

to go that way. I'm really proud of you guys. I wore it off as long as I could. I've been waiting. I've been like, man, this is getting really medical. Yeah, so I think

the other thing you can do is download the PreCheck app. It's free. Breast Cancer Foundation put it out last year, and it does show you how to check yourself. So if you want to just give yourself a crash course, and it will also remind you, however much you'd like to be reminded, it'll nudge you to go, hey, check your boobs out.

Oh, that's cool. Look at notification. Yeah. Oh, that's great. That's a great idea. Yeah. App Store and Google Play, so it's on all the devices. Yeah, totally.

And I guess what I would say for this is not only know your normal, but also if there's any shops or like retail stores, gyms, anywhere in New Zealand who think, I would love to have some of these beautiful stickers up in my changing rooms or in your mirrors, you can go to

either the Breast Cancer Foundation website or the link is on my Instagram, Sarah on the radio. Just go to my link in bio. But you can register for stickers there for free. We will send them out to you for free. You can have as many as you want. You can have posters as well. Whatever you need,

we will send it to you because really this campaign relies on it being as many places as possible. Farmers are helping us for the launch. So there's going to be one of these stickers in every women's changing room in Farmers, which is great because it means it gets it

right across New Zealand. But my hope is like nationwide domination and I would love anybody who's up for supporting to go and register for a sticker, please. And you can,

I was actually contemplating putting one on the back of my car, but I thought nine boobs might be really distracting. Yeah, might cause some accidents. What do you think? I don't know. Terrible idea?

No, because you might like pull up to the lights and the person behind you. Yeah. That's just reminded me. Put it on the back of a bus, like a bus size advertisement. That would be handy. Imagine nine, because that would be a boob on a butt. That would be. And then the new conservatives complain about breasts being exposed in public.

And there's publicity you can't buy. I'm waiting for this. Someone is going to whinge. for this Someone is going to whinge 100% Someone is going to whinge Alright well you can Check out the website bcf.org.nz

Slash pre-check Zeragandy Thank you so much Thanks guys ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Megan The podcast Megan's going to

Reveal the gender Of her baby soon Before 8 o'clock Yee Yeah Dude You've got to work On your excited noises about this baby. It's going to take attention away from me and I don't like it.

And there it is. There it is. The whole thing. The truth comes out. The whole thing. We're going away today and... By the way, I still can't check in. Okay, good.

Just me at this stage is going away. See you tonight. In Christ's name. Why does she look like you and not Megan and I? I look great in orange. Okay, great. They want me on board. Okay.

So afterwards, I'm going to go get the girls from my parents. So I've got the family car. The Hyundai. The nicer car. The nice car. Yeah. The nicer car. But that means Sade's got to drive my Honda for a few days,

which yesterday when I got home, I was like, okay, this car is a mess. It's fine when it's just me because I don't care, but she shouldn't have to sit in this filth. You gave me a ride home the other day. There was hay on the seat. Yeah. And mud.

Man, do I find some hay. You clean it for her, but we have to sit in that filth. Not very often and never planned. But anyway, I got to cleaning and it was all on. I had to empty the vacuum cleaner four times. There was a lot of hay, as you said. I transported a lot of plants and that tipped over and there was some potting mix, et cetera.

So that all got cleaned up. The most interesting thing I found, I went under the seat and the little blower thing under the seat that blows hot air into the back seat, I could see something under it. And I'd never really been under the seat. And I was like, what is that? And I put my finger in, and I was like, that's weird. And I grabbed it, pinched it, and it was well in, under the carpet.

I pulled it out, Japanese chewing gum. What? From when the car was in Japan. What? What? It was underneath. What flavor? It It was underneath. What flavour? It smelt minty.

I can't read Japanese, so I can't confirm, but it smelt minty. Oh, like still the packet. Yeah, yeah. Wow, that's crazy. So I gave it the thorough vacuuming. And also I finally took care of that pesky situation that arose when that tree was down on the road and I hit it. And it wiped out my wing mirror.

Yeah. Because I bought a new wing mirror, but it was white and my car is black. So I got some tape and some painted tape. Why didn't you buy a black one? They didn't have one. And I masked out the bits that I didn't want to paint and I painted it with a spray can.

Painted it black. Wait, like just a spray can? Yeah. Genuinely, I'm quite impressed with how it turned out. Is it a gloss finish? You sent a photo in the group chat, but it looks like a different black. Not really. It looks more like a black than a white would.

Fair call. Fair call, I'll give you that. So that got sorted. It even works. You can even like change it from the driver's seat. Wow. The angle. Everything got hooked up.

Wow. Okay. Push the button and it goes. One thing I had to fix after because I had to clean the wheels and they've been clean for ages. And you know how the wheel, Maggie wheel bit gets real dirty? Yeah. So I clean it and some stuff wouldn't come off.

I was like, I wonder if CRC will make this come off. Now what I didn't take into consideration was the brake pads right behind it. Don't spray CRC on the brake pads. Oh, my God. So anyway, when I went to put the car away, I was driving into the garage and I put my foot on the brakes and nothing happened. And you're giving that to your wife today. So I backed it back out.

Again, I put my foot on the brakes. There was a bit more grip And I went in and I like Sprayed it with lots of water Oh my god And I just said to her I will give you fair warning Don't rely on them

For the first couple of times They are getting better So I mean it's clean But it's a death trap So no different Cleanest death trap Well no now you're gonna die of sliding through an intersection rather than whatever you'll catch from the seats.

Legionnaires, maybe. Yeah, yeah. Well, the potting mix. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Megan's baby diary. Oh, my God.

Do you know why I love this? Because Fletch just hates it. You know what? I hate babies. Don't say you hate babies. Don't say that. You can't say you hate babies. I'll rephrase.

On planes when they cry. You're not a huge fan. You're not a huge, what's the word? Like paternal person. Not at all. I've been well known to block. I haven't blocked you yet on Facebook. Oh, I just thought that had happened.

No, not yet. I just assumed we'd got that. When you start posting like 10 baby pics a day, I'll be like I'm out. Really wonderful be that type of person. Everyone says they're not going to and then they do, eh? Yeah, they do. Well, to kick off this segment, it is where I'm going to give updates on what's going on

but to kick it off, we thought we would start it by revealing what we are having. So it is pretty strange in 2020 because Andrew and I have discussed this at home. We've discussed it at work. We've all agreed it is pretty weird to kind of reveal your child's genitals, which is essentially what you're doing. And everyone asks, what are you having? Are you going to find out? And we're planners, so we were always going to find out

just for name, clothes, et cetera. Yeah. But the issue is if you haven't conned on already that assigning someone's gender based purely on their genitals, it doesn't always match up. So, and I don't want to be the person that always grandstands on everything. I feel like I could easily become that person but I don't want to do the community a disservice by not pre-empting this

by saying that we are two cisgendered parents we are open and supportive and we will accept and love our child whoever they choose to be whoever they choose to love and whatever they choose to do in their life. So yes, I am going to reveal the genitals, which is so weird. Now, did you bring smoke bomb? No, I only bought one and I used it at home. Now, I've got my flamethrower in the car. Do you want me to go get it?

Because I can burn different fuels to make it burn different flame colours. Okay. And I could just spin it around wildly. Should you have given that back after your army service? They never asked for it. The dishonourable discharge from the New Zealand army was quick. They didn't ask for all the gear back.

I'm pretty sure they want that rocket launcher back as well. Do you guys, are you placing a bet? I am amazed because I found out on Monday. And you haven't put your foot in it. I haven't. But have you got bets? I haven't, nah. Flea doesn't care.

Do you want one or the other? No, no, it doesn't worry me. It's not mine, is it? I'm so great with babies. Shit, when you have a child, you don't care as long as it's healthy and it's... Absolutely. Yeah. But I don't know.

I haven't put too much thought into what it could possibly be. Do you want a drum roll? Yeah, okay, hit it. Do you want like a medium drum roll or an over the top? I think it's got to be over the top. Okay. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Oh, yeah. Oh, okay. It's a boy. Yeah. Lawrence. Lawrence. Lawrence.

Lawrence. Lawrence. Yeah. It's all coming up, Lawrence, Lawrence, Lawrence, Lawrence, Lawrence. Yay. It's all coming up, Lawrence, baby. Vaughn and I have always joked that Megan and Andrew would have just one boy. A spoiled little boy named Lawrence. And he would just be dressed in Gucci. Yes, the most wonderful little diva boy. Yep.

The only person that could out diva you two, Lawrence. But you made it so that as soon as I found out, getting the, what do you call it? The ultrasound thingy. Yeah. You two were the first people I thought of. Yay!

I was like, oh no, Lawrence is inbound. Lawrence is inbound. This is great news. Yeah. Wow, cool. Yeah. Wow. Cool. Great.

It's not going to be, he's not going to be named Lawrence. Please. No. It's all our fault. Have you said it on a name? Yes. What's the first letter? No. No.

Oh, why not? I don't want to know either. No, no, fun. Also, you're absolutely going to hate his name. Q. Is it Q? No, no. L. Don't start. hate his name. Q. Is it Q? No. L.

Don't start. Don't start. S. Mm-mm. Sebastian. Stop. Okay. That's his middle name.

Lawrence Sebastian. It's in Papadopoulos. And he's going back to the full Papadopoulos. He's not happy with Papas. He wants it all, baby. And when does he want it? He wants it now. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast.

Fletch Warner Megan. it's nine past eight. Radio Tinder. Rude. Radio Tinder. Now, the last time we played Radio Tinder, producer Jared was, we sprung this on you and you matched with quite a few, didn't you? Yeah, I got five matches.

Ladies were coming in hot, too. They were. Now, you actually got a few numbers, and I believe you were planning a date. Was it last weekend? Yeah. Look, so the date didn't actually end up happening. We were both wildly hungover from two separate events, so...

You cancelled? Postponed. Who postponed first? It was a mutual thing. I think I sent the message saying, hey, I'm pretty not in a good way today. Pretty not in a good way today. Right.

And a bit of Shea Keane, do you think? Yeah, next time she's in the area or I'm in her area, we're going to... Sounds aloof. Is that what you're calling it? Bloody kids and their codes these days. You could have sheeted Powerade and cut it up on the couch. Sounds aloof. Is that what you're calling it? They're kids and their codes these days. You could have sheeted Powerade and cut it up on the couch.

I would have had the whole Powerade to myself. It was a bad day. You can buy two Powerades. I'm on a producer budget. Buy your own Powerade. All right, well, let's meet today's Radio Tinder contestant. Spinning the wheel on Radio Tinder today, Rowan. In his spare time, you'll either find him catching a fish,

getting behind the local sports team, or he might be looking after foster kids. He's a true Aquarius who loves helping others. If you love to live, laugh, and love, meet Rowan. Rowan, good morning. I think everybody's heart just melted when the voiceover guy said looking after foster kids. Oh my God. Yeah, it's true, believe it or not.

Right. I'm married to an Aquarius and they are very caring. And he doesn't look after foster children, so you... He doesn't care that much. Right. Okay, so do you just look after them and you... Yes, to be fair, it's been something I've been doing for a while since I left school.

And it's a job, like I do it one day a week on a Sunday. So just children and young people who are sort of in compromised situations, this place out in South Auckland, and sort of just like a mentor, sort of someone who can take them to sports and stuff like that. That's so selfless, that's part stuff like that. That's so selfless. That's part of your weekend. That's so cool. Did you hear that, Producer Jared, when you were hungover?

What were you doing on a Sunday? Yeah, piece of shit. Yeah, I'm way out of my depth here. Look at Thuram. Wow, very cool. Okay. And what do you do for a job? So I work in events.

Okay, all right. And you fish? Yeah, I I work in events. Okay. All right. And you fish? Yeah, I fish. I fish. Okay. I don't have a boat, but I've got friends who have boats. Oh, okay. Best of both worlds.

That's all you need. That's all you need, isn't it? No responsibility. Way cheaper to be the friend of a person with a boat than having your own. Just hypothetical on a date, if you took me fishing would you put the bait on the hook? Yeah I'd put the bait on the hook. Would you get the fish off?

Would you get the fish off too? You're real flabby. I'd do it for the first time and then I'd be like oh no you know you gotta try and do it. Give a man a fish, teach a man to fish. Or a woman to fish. So any other hobbies?

So I'm pretty into sports. I play golf and cricket, unfortunately. Two of the longest sports. So looking after kids on a Sunday and then you won't see me on Saturday either. Golf and cricket. Wow. That's too much boring sport.

And how old are you? I'm 25. Okay. Yeah. Right, okay. What about pets? Cats or dogs? Dogs. I. Okay. Yeah. Right, okay. What about pets? Cats or dogs? Dogs.

I don't have any, but there's any dogs. Okay. All right. What's your handicap? I would like to say I'm off about 16. Okay. But probably more like a 20. Okay.

So not like super advanced that if you went low. No, no, no. I don't know which way is better. What way is lower better? Lower's better. But then this is the other thing about if you've got a high handicap, so not like super advanced I don't know which way is better what way is lower better lower is better but then this is the other thing if you've got a high handicap

like someone who doesn't play and then you go with someone who's really good they get really frustrated with you but like 20 okay there's a lot of teaching

going on there I'm sort of good enough to know more or less where it's going which is the fun part yeah right okay you can do that thing

where you get behind them and you're like it's all in the hips isn't it it's all in the hips, isn't it? Yeah. It's all in the hips. That's a bit sexy. Well, important question then. What are you looking for?

Who are you looking for? Someone who is sort of outdoorsy. I'm a pretty bit of an outdoorsman, you know? Someone who's funny and someone who likes a drink because I like a drink, you know, after a hard day's work. Guy, girl or both? Girl. And what would your ideal date be? Like are you a flashy kind of date guy or?

No. Like a picnic with some buns from the supermarket and some... Costar on hand! A hot chicken, a hot chicken, a deli chicken! That's the best! You can't go past a deli chicken. Maybe like a second date. First date, I'd, you know, go for a drink, get a bit.

And then deli chicken. You've got to have some wet wipes if you're going to deli chicken it because you go in with your fingers and you pull the chicken a bit and often you're left with the sticky fingers afterwards. You want some wet wipes. Okay, well, if you would like to call up and play Radio Tinder, Rowan's got a whole bunch of questions that he can ask you. Fleece for an Amigan's Radio Tinder. Rowan is got a whole bunch of questions that he can ask you.

Rowan is in with us. Good morning, everybody. Now, Rowan is 25, as we just heard. Quite outdoorsy, sportsy, loves to fish, and looks after foster kids once a week. He's an Aquarius. Which means... Caring. Yeah.

Very loving. If you believe in star signs. Lots of people do. Because I'm an Aquarius. There's always an exception. I'm an Aquarius, but I'm on the cusp. Yeah, if I see an Aquarius. Yeah.

It's all bull. Let's meet our contestants. We'll start with Hannah. Good morning, Hannah. Welcome to Radio Tinder. Good morning. Alright, so. Let's meet our contestants. We'll start with Hannah. Good morning, Hannah. Welcome to Radio Tinder. Good morning. All right. Let me say, this is something I want to try. Oh, Hannah and Rowan, have you met my wife, Shada? Yes, that feels good when you say the names.

Oh, yeah, right. You just tested. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Rowan, you've got some questions for Hannah. Yes, hi. Good morning, Hannah. Good morning. Question number one.

Are you enrolled to vote? Yes, definitely. Good morning, Hannah. Good morning. Question number one. Are you enrolled to vote? Yes, definitely. Oh, yes. Good on you, mate. Number two. What's your go-to drink on a night out? Oh. Can I guess?

Yeah. Go for it. Should I write it down? Or should I just say it out loud? Just guess. Yeah. I feel like you're an espresso martini girl. Oh, I probably used to be,

but I actually go for the whiskey sours now. Oh! Yeah, the espresso martinis keep you up, don't they? They do. They keep me up too late. And you don't want the caffeine to make you take a poo on a night out, do you? That's happened.

No, but you're right, because have you seen bar toilets? We're trying to keep this sexy. Yeah, we are, sorry. And we're doing the men's ones. Someone's always weird on the seat. Okay. Okay, and question number three.

Money aside, what would be your ideal weekend? Probably going down to Queenstown and going up the mountain for the snowboarding. A few beers afterwards in the sun. Onsen, do the hot pools. Onsen hot pools. She's outdoorsy. Make that, Graham. Watch the cricket.

Nope. No. That's a yes. That's a yes, Hannah. Yes, Hannah. Congratulations. All right, wait there. Wait there, Hannah.

We'll get some details. Elizabeth, good morning. Welcome to Radio Tinder. Hi. I was meant to do a spiel, but I freaked out. Oh, my God, bless. That's all right. I love the honesty.

You're 29? Yes, I'm a 29-year-old. My last day of being 29. Oh, okay. And, yeah, yeah, happy Elizabeth's birthday Eve. And I'm a graphic designer for a jewellery company in Christchurch. Wow, okay. Oh, she's going to be picky when the engagement comes around, that means.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Good morning, Elizabeth. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh, good morning. Yeah, question number one for you. Are you enrolled to vote? Yes, absolutely. I'm loving this voting memorandum you've got going. Good morning Question number one for you Are you enrolled to vote? Yes, absolutely

I'm loving this voting memorandum you've got going Can I also say vote.nz for all the voting info This election Is it because if somebody's not enrolled to vote Rowan, would that kind of put you off Because you want them to at least have an opinion And be political? Yeah, well, I would encourage them to enroll

Okay I like that Just didn't know if you're on the big orange money there Yeah, well, I would encourage them to enrol. Okay. Yeah, of course. I like that. I like that. All right. Just didn't know if you're on the big orange money there or not. Big orange man money. Yeah. Okay, question number two.

How would your friends describe you in one sentence? They would describe me as a very caring, facetious, funny friend. Facetious? Do you know facetious? Yeah, facetious, funny friend. Facetious? Do you know facetious? Yeah, facetious. One of my favourite words. Yeah, I've gotten that a lot recently. Like, oh, you're so facetious.

And I was like, oh, I love it. It's such a really weird... It's not a compliment, though. In my experience, everyone would call me facetious. I know, but I take it as a compliment. I think it's great. So do you mean you're quite sassy, Claire?

What? Would you be quite sassy? Not really. I wouldn't call myself sassy. I'd just call myself fast and witty. Okay. She's treating serious issues with deliberately inappropriate humour. She's flippant.

Yeah, that's true. Oh, I like that. Okay, yeah, that's good. We all learn to do words. Great. Hey, don't be so facetious. Okay, and question number three. What's your main deal breaker?

Oh, okay. Okay, there's kind of like two. Okay. No, there's two. There's only really two. I'm not that picky. I'm like 29. It's like the list is getting shorter.

Every year she knocks one off. Okay. Yeah, so like the two are, like, one, if someone is, like, not very socially conscious and if they're just, like, if they're just, like, if they're very conservative, well, there's nothing wrong with that,

but if you're, like, a dickhead conservative. Yeah. And, like... Same. Yeah. And also like I'm sorry if you are I'm sorry if you're

No no no I'm agreeing with you We wouldn't have Dickie conservatives On the show Oh okay Great But you hear what I'm saying

Those type of things Like Every time they come out With like Oh you know I just think it should be All lives matter Rather than black lives matter

I'm like No No Yeah Okay Alright And then my second one is sweatpants. What's wrong with sweatpants?

Pants! Right, so deep. It's so moral. Yeah, we went from Black Lives Matter to sweatpants. Oh, just, you know, I have range. So like, yeah, this one guy said like, oh, is there anything I should know coming around? And I was like, well, if you're wearing sweatpants, don't come around.

He was like, oh, I'll change then. I'm like, yeah. I can't confirm Rowan is wearing black jeans. Oh, thank God. That's a yes, Claire. Man. Sorry, Elizabeth, that is a yes. I'm jumping the gun there.

Thank you. We'll hook you up. We welcome Claire next to Radio Tinder. Claire, good morning. Claire, good morning. Good morning. Excellent, just turn the radio off there. Okay, Rowan, you've got some questions. Yes, good morning, Claire.

Are you enrolled to vote? Hi. I totally thought that I, yeah, didn't realise that was on. Sorry. Okay. This is you, Claire. Yeah, so Claire, are you enrolled to vote? I sure am, yeah. Okay, good. All right. Okay.

I'll do a start. Where is the first place you want to travel when the world opens? I think Morocco. Oh, Morocco. Morocco, why there? Well, I just like the desert, riding a camel, a new culture. And a tagine. All of the time, yeah.. And a tagine. All of the time. Yeah.

Beautiful tagine. Sweet. And the last one. Do you hit snooze or get out of bed straight away? I guess today I was guilty of one snooze and then I was straight up. Because what do you do

Rowan? Are you a snoozer? No, I'm a get out. Same. Yeah, same. Because you can use all those youan? Are you a snoozer? No, I'm a get out. Same. Yeah, same. Because you can use all those, you know, if you snooze three times. Snoozy times to good quality sleep. Yeah, you could have 30 minutes of good quality sleep and then just get up. No way. I'd rather have anxiety filled, freaked out. I'm on my phone, but I put it down.

But is the alarm still on? Freak out sleep. That's the good stuff. That doesn't snooze. And next minute, an and hours gone by. Okay, well, that's a yes. Claire, fantastic. Congratulations.

It's a match. We'll put you in touch. Let's do one more quickly. Erica, good morning. Welcome to Radio Tinder. Good morning. How are you? Really good.

Good morning, Erica. Okay, question number one. Drumroll, please. Are you enrolled to vote? I Really good. Good morning, Erica. Okay, question number one. Drumroll, please. Are you enrolled to vote? I sure am. Good. Yeah. 100%.

That's good, yeah. Okay, and question number two. Would you consider yourself a good girl or a bad girl? A good girl. What's your preference? Good girl. Okay. Oh, there we go. That's how you said it. Like if you had said... Yeah Girl. Okay. Oh, there we go.

That's how you said it. Like if you said... Good Girl, he, he, he. Okay, and the last one. What would your hype song be? Oh, yeah. Oh, this is so hard. Something Lizzo.

Yeah. Grave Hype. Grave height. Great. Good. All right, that's a lie. Yes, four from four. Erica, congratulations. We'll put you in touch.

Rowan. You did well. Four out of four. Fantastic. They were all great. Thank you, producers. Fantastic. I bet three of them were fake at least.

Catfish. Catfish. Catfish. Are you sure they're not old truck drivers? Old men that were pretending to be females? 85% sure. Okay, we've seen catfish on MTV. It happens. There'll be some very convincing female voices.

Ryan, thanks for coming in, mate. Thank you, guys. Appreciate it. Thanks for playing. Next on the show, it's Fact of the Day. Oh. What was that? Don't say Fact of the Day and then play the sad song.

Sad. Come here. That was ready in case you disliked anybody in Radio Tinder, but it never happened. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Fact of the Day, Day, day, day, day. I have to say thank you to somebody for sending this in. They sent it in.

Mountie at the social media desk copied it and sent it to me. Hinero sent this in. Okay. It's a fact about mummies. Okay. About ancient Egyptian mummies. Ever wondered why they're called mummies?

Or is that something you've just Because they're mummified? Yeah, but what does that mean? Oh, I don't know. Which came first? I never thought about it. Why are you mummified? What does mummifying mean?

You preserve. Maha! Maha! Maha! Maha! Today's fact of the day is that mummies are called mummies because the ancient Persian word for bitumen, like what we use in the road and stuff,

is mumia. And that is what they were mummified in, preserved in. The earliest mummies were preserved in like a raw, not quite road quality bitumen. Yeah. But bitumen. Not the stuff you see Fulton Hogan pumping out. Nah, which I love the smell of.

I know, same. I won't lie. I go slow past the trucks. Does that make us drug addicts? No, because I can stop whenever I want to. It's not like I go around looking for a Fulton Hogan sign. You guys are still on the road, are you? Give us a little snack.

It's like when you walk to the planes on the tarmac and you get a whiff of the jet fuel. That's good stuff too. Do you prefer that or bitumen? Bitumen. Every time. Yeah's good stuff too. What do you prefer, that or bitumen? Bitumen. Every time. Yeah, maybe that too. Are you discussing

what road surfaces you prefer? The smell of. The smell of. Oh, okay. Like sometimes when you're walking in summer and you get a little bit of that ticky tacky, ticky tacky.

Yeah. Because you're on the road, I'll go, I'll bend over and give it a bit of a... You're weird, man. But I don't like the petrol station.

Worrying me. Oh no, neither. Every time we're filling up, my daughter's like The petrol station Worrying me Oh no neither Every time we're filling up My daughter's like I do love the smell of petrol I'm like That's concerning Yeah

I don't know if you should Love the smell of petrol But then I slow down Past roadworks And I'm like You can't beat bitumen On a hot morning So

Why are they called mummies then? Because So they were They worked out They could preserve the bodies Yeah In bitumen That they got from the Dead Sea So why are they called mummies then? Because, so they were, they worked out they could preserve the bodies in bitumen that they got from the Dead Sea. Now, the secret to the Dead Sea bitumen was that it contained sulfur, which would stop the rot.

It would stop, it was kind of like, what's the word? Not antibiotics, but it would stop small microorganisms breaking down the body and the rot and everything. Antimicrobial. Right. Okay.

It had antimicrobial properties, so it would stop the breakdown so that they would use that to preserve mummies. Okay. And the Egyptians used that. Lots of any mummification around the Middle East used it, and the Persian name for them was mummia, which mum meant wax, and because this was waxy but different, they called it Mamiya.

So if you were to embalm someone, they would be a mummy. Okay. If you were to use that technique, but then the name caught on and then the people in the, you know, the objects became known as mummies rather than what was used to make them into preserved. And then they came to life in the Brendan Fraser movie. Yes. And that's. Oh life in the Brendan Fraser movie. Yes. Oh, my gosh, so much trouble.

But do you know people used to eat the first, the mummies, they used to grind them up and eat them when they first discovered them. Like in the 1800s. Oh, what? Well, like in a smoothie, like a bit of collagen. Like so back in the day, before you could just pop down to the supermarket

and get some organic free-range bone broth, you'd have to find a mummy, grind it up, put it in a slow cooker and do it yourself. And now you're all just eating collagen pills and bone broth. Okay? And back in the day we had to work for our bone broth. And there was even a special dye colour called mummy brown, which was you ground up a mummy, added it to a dye substance and dyed dresses,

and that would be mummy brown. And you can Google what colour mummy brown was. And when people found out how it was being made, they were a bit like, oh, maybe we should find a different one about brown. Like tree bark and other stuff we were using before we were grinding up dead bodies from thousands of years ago. So yeah, we went through a lot of mummies

before they became like museum artefacts. We were eating them and using them to dye our clothes. But today's fact of the day is mummies are called mummies because of what they were mummified in. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. It's time to play How's Benny with Benny. Guys, remember concerts? Remember concerts?

They're back, baby. Benny sold out tonight's kicking off her New Zealand tour in Christchurch. Sold out all over the country. But we have a double pass right now to the Christchurch show. And we welcome one of our first contestants, Laurie. Good morning. Good morning. Good morning.

And you are going to be playing against Andrew. Andrew, good morning. Hello, good morning. Hello, good morning. Hello, good morning. Okay, now I just want to remind you the item I'm about to tell you is not the prize for today's competition. You might get very excited about this item. That is not the prize. It is simply what we're guessing the price of.

Have you chosen just an item at random? Yes. Now, Laurie and Andrew, it will be, this is how House Benny with Benny works. It'll be the closest person to guess the item, the amount of money that the item costs that Vaughan mentions. Am I saying that right? The price. Oh, the price.

Otherwise known as the price. Today's item is a Stihl MS180 14-inch bar petrol chainsaw. Oh, of course it is. From the Stihl shop. That's where I've got my price from. Okay, right. Steel. I've got no idea how much a chainsaw costs.

Andrew, would you like to have the first guess? I'll give it a crack at 297. 297. We're going to lock in 297. Laurie. Is it Laurie or lock in 297. Laurie. Is it Laurie or Laurie? Laurie. Who's called Laurie?

Like old men and trucks are called Laurie. It's a Laurie. Laurie as in Rise of Tori. Oh, Tori, okay. Laurie. Laurie. I'm going to go with 380. 380. $380.

Okay. I have no idea. We're going for the exact price, aren't we? No, it's the closest. It's just who's closest. Oh, okay then. Christ, do you not listen to anything I say? I thought we were apparently priced this right.

It was like lower, higher, higher, lower. We'll be here all day. We'll be here all day. No one cares that much. We wouldn't be because I tell you what, Laurie is knocking on the door. Congratulations. What?

Oh, my God. Laurie, you are only $15 off. $395. House Benny with Benny. Our first House Benny with Benny winner. Fantastic. You've got a double pass to see her tonight. Thank you so much.

My kids are going to love you. All right, well done. And probably just worth a mention, Benny in no way endorsing steel chainsaws and really has no idea that we're doing this competition. Wanted nothing to do with it. Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM.

Well, Vaughan, you have Megan's suitcase. The big silver suitcase. For one night away. My undies are in there. One side is zipped and one side is not. Oh, do you have the one side has its own all year though? That's flash.

Fancy suitcase here. But it's, you know, I always take away a massive suitcase. It's got a built in lock. Oh yeah, no one uses a lock though, do they? I always take a big suitcase because we need options. Are you looking at my undies? No.

Where are your undies? In the locked side. No, the locked side is what we're referring to. Oh, into the locked side? You'll unzip it and it'll be... He was looking at your undies. No, I can't see your undies. I can see...

Don't look. I think you've murdered a Muppet and it's stuffed in here. That's my jacket. Okay, don't... It looks like snuffleupagus. It does. It's like my brother's in my undie drawer. Get out of it.

I'm not in your undies. I can't see any undies. Okay, good. They're right at the bottom, thankfully. Now, you taking up one half of your giant suitcase is a pillow. Pregnancy pillow. That's as tall as my torso, right? Where does it?

Well, if I started at my head, it goes down to my gorge. That would be like a metre, 1.5, no, 1. Nah, not 1.5. 1.2. 1? 1.2 metres. That looks worse for wear, eh?

Should we just all spend five minutes speculating its length? Get out your phone and do the camera thing because I need to know how long that... That's, unless you're getting a perfectly straight surface, that's unreliable.

Oh, okay. Trust me, I tried to design a, I tried to design a harbour bridge using it, and it's got a few weak points. Now, the pregnancy pillow is... It goes to my head, to my knee. Yeah, it's almost as big as you. And so you obviously bring that because you're pregnant and because hotel pillows, we know, are rubbish.

Well, you'd already spoken about how you guys always take your pillows, and I never do, but I've been sleeping with that every night, and I'm just not confident that I will be able to sleep without it. I'm not going to lie, but would you judge me as a single man if I had a pregnancy pillow? Because that looks so comfortable. Dude, like, when I

leave, my husband cuddles it. Like, I wouldn't judge you. It's so legit. It looks very spoonable. Trouble is I'm the big spoon, so that works, doesn't it? It needs arms. It needs arms. Okay, I'll judge you if you sewed arms on it. Oh, I'm not going to sew arms on it.

Come here, cuddles. What's the idea with a maternity pillow again? You put it between your knees, right, and then you hold it. And you can rest your thumb on it too. Yeah, that's right. Because everything kind of like gravity pulls you down a little bit. That works for me too after a big night of eating. I put my tum on it.

You rest your tum on it. Yeah, I put a movie to side. How much, where do you buy these from? Because I've never seen them. Are you kidding? Like Briscoes. Yeah. You can get some that just literally have like a little tummy bit

and you just chuck it under your tummy and then you have one you can just put between your knees. Oh, I just want a big long one. That sounds great. Beep in. I just, I. Do you just tune in? I was just thinking about something else.

I joined the conversation and you're after a big long one? Pillow. Ah! That's good stuff. Zedien's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, It's good stuff.