ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 23rd November 2020

Episode Date: November 22, 2020

Bad News if you use your Phone on the Toilet  Top 6: Smart Glasses  What was the insane client request?  Where's my Medal?  Producer Jared has a Romance Update  Fishy Tank Season 2 Episode 1!  When did you think 'Shit I Love You'?  Vaughan's Yum Cha  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Download the Maccas app to get McCafe rewards today. Monday the 23rd. Excuse me. Sorry, I just got apple juice on my microphone too. Of Applevember. With Megan slurping an apple everywhere. End of this week, Thursday this week's Thanksgiving. And then of course Friday after Thanksgiving is traditional Black Friday sales. Yeah! Black Friday sales have already started with now what they're calling pre-Black Friday sales. Yeah.

I don't trust it. Because I saw all the stuff today and I thought Black Friday was Friday. Just gone. No. Exactly. No, no. That's what I said. Calm down.

Because I knew Thanksgiving is the last Thursday of November. Right. And, yeah, now it's pre-Black Friday sales. But do you think that, I just think that they're doing those and then on Friday they're going to get even better? So you say don't get involved in the pre-Black Friday sales? Well, I'm just, that's just what I'm doing. But what if the pre-Black Friday sales are better than the Black Friday sales?

Why would they do that? That would be madness. Was it last year or somewhere we talked about how all these places were having sales and they weren't even on special? That's why you need to, I always sort out my list of what I want to get beforehand and then you know the prices. Because then if they hike them and then put a sale on, you know they're lying. That's right, because they put them way up before, don't they? Yeah. And then so that the discount, I remember they did that.

That's why you go to places like Price Spy's got that thing. If you find something you want, you go to the bottom, it shows you the graph of what its pricing's been throughout the year. And then if it goes up just before this and then comes down a little bit, but it's still above what it was previously, just hang on. They're cheeky buggers, aren't they? Yeah. Those retailers?

Yeah, cheeky bastards. Didn't the Commerce Commission or something say they weren't allowed to do that anymore? Yeah, people love listening to the Commerce Commission. What are you, the police? If we catch you, you're in big trouble. I'm just looking at a camera. A camera? Oh, no, I just clicked on a random thing.

As an exam. As an EG. And it dropped recently. But, yeah, no, it didn't have a big spike beforehand but if you look at yeah some things go up and down so yeah just be wary of that just be aware of them you might think you're getting a sweet deal but it might be 20 off what's gone up 30 yeah so tread lightly especially these these pre-black fr sales Yeah, they're cheeky buggers Cheeky Cheeky bastards Good morning, welcome to the show

Fletch, Vaughan and Megan And welcome to Joseph Gordon-Levitt Who's in New Zealand, in Wellington Yes Who will be listening Definitely be listening right now JGL What's up?

He owes us that much. I watched a lot of Third Rock from the Sun. Yep. I was a big fan of Third Rock from the Sun, a show that he was in. I've also seen Looper. 500 Days of Summer. Yeah, 500 Days of Summer. He was in that.

I've seen Looper, where he played a young Bruce Willis. That was a good movie, that one. That was a good movie, actually. I don't think that got enough praise for the movie that it was. Yeah. Inception, of course he was in Inception. Of course, yeah. He was in the final instalment of Christopher Nolan's

Batman trilogy. Are you trying to make him like you? 100% yes. Okay. And he can do a run-up-the-wall backflip. And I think he's fantastic singing, dancing, all Randy DeTona. And I think, isn't he one of the guys who puts himself out there quite hard as a feminist? I'm like, yes, I love you. Joseph Gordon-Levitt, I believe.

I don't know that for sure. Sounds like him. Sounds like him. Sounds right in his wheelhouse. What's he doing here? I feel like there are so many celebrities in New Zealand that have snuck in. They reckon they're here for work, but they're escaping COVID-19, I think. I'd want to escape

America at night. Who did I read is it's not Sam Rockwell. It's my other favourite. I saw a picture of this person and I was like, I really like him. And literally it's like the place where they're filming is just around the corner from my kids' school. I drive past it on the way

to pick them up where they're filming this thing and I'm like, what are they filming there? Well, I need to know who this celebrity is now. That's not Tim. Tim Roth. Oh, Tim Roth.

Yes. Yes. I read about that at the weekend. Oh God, I love Tim Roth. Sorry, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, if you could just wait for a moment,

I'm going to brown eyes another international celebrity. Tim Roth is very good. Quentin Tarantino movies. Oh, yeah. Joseph Gordon-Levitt got a bit of spiel. You've just said Tim Roth is good. I Gordon-Levitt got a better spiel. You've just said

Tim Roth is good. I feel like, does Tim Roth need the spiel? Oh, Joseph Gordon-Levitt over Tim Roth any day. Me too. But I don't really know

More versatile. More versatile. Yeah, absolutely. You only can see sings and dance. Tim Roth can do comedy. Tim Roth's got great comedic timing

but he's also like a serious actor because he did that US TV series where he was like a crime scene investigator for a while. But I liked him back in the day of the Tarantino films. He was in a lot of Quentin Tarantino films. And he was the bad guy in the second Incredible Hulk movie where Edward Norton took the reins from Eric Banner.

Both two more fantastic actors. None of them want to be your friend. Just joined us. It's Vaughan Smith wants to be friends with actors in New Zealand. Yeah, until he actually has to be friends with them and then he'll say he's busy or he's got something on with his kids. So he doesn't have to go, yeah. Just socialising is quite exhausting.

Coming up on the show before seven, your chance to win with McCafe $200 cash. I've been sent the in a month's worth of free McCafe coffee. Lovely. Thank you producer, aren't you there in the air? That's coming up before

seven on the show. The top six is also before seven. It's the top six smart wearable tech because Amazon are trying to do what Google could not and release glass, smart glasses.

They go on the old, remember Google glasses? Snapchat tried that as well. Do you remember Snapchat glasses? No. I feel everyone. Yeah.

Everyone's giving that a go. Could other people see what you were seeing on Snapchat? You were walking down the street and you were like, oh God,

I don't want a dick pic. No, I think it street and you were like, oh God, unwanted dick pic. No, I think it was just you. Walk into traffic, boom. Yeah, so the top six thoughts of smart wearable tech. All right, seven minutes past six. If you want nicer skin, yeah. What's wrong with my skin? I didn't want to say anything.

That's why I didn't target you specifically. But there's one thing you could be eating okay collagen no Megan that doesn't work people are literally throwing their money away now I thought this might have come in as one of those PR emails that was you know

slanted and biased in favour of whoever they were trying to promote. In this case, it would have been Big Mango. Big Mango. Not the Big Mango, which I'm sure is definitely in Australia somewhere, but Big Mango money, I thought, yeah, would have controlled this. So on speaking of mangoes, have you noticed they're always super cheap at the supermarket lately? I don't buy mangoes.

Why not? I love mangoes. I love a mango as well, but they're always super cheap at the supermarket lately? I don't buy mangoes. Why not? I love mungos. I love a mango as well, but they're an absolute monster to eat. No, you've got to know the way to cut them. Once you know the way to cut them. Yeah, they're pretty stringy in New Zealand. You can't make like a Thai mango. Oh, yeah.

But then if you're going to buy a Thai mango here, then they're spennies. Well, they got picked early, didn't they? To get here. Yeah. They got picked a little early and that affected me. Fresh, fresh mango. You can't go wrong. But what is your technique?

Run it round. Run the knife around it like an avocado. You go on both sides. You cut down both sides on the stone. And then you... You do the squares. You do the squares. And then you pop it open.

What about all the stuff you've missed around the stone? You can get a knife with that or you can just go nom nom nom. Nah, when you nom nom nom that's when it all gets stuck in your teeth. It's just a risky take. Right, to enjoy delicious mango. Yeah. Well, according to the University of California, a woman with fairer skin who ate half

a cup of mangoes four times a week, see a 23% reduction in wrinkles in two months. And then after four months, these patients would see a 20% reduction in wrinkles in two months. And then after four months, these patients would see a 20% decline in facial wrinkles. Okay. Wow, that's more science than collagen. Far more. That's fine, but

what about when you hit the months when they're like out of season? Well, you're paying $7 a mango. Yeah. Tough, yeah, you gotta get in on that skincare. Though you can in the frozen food section, they get the frozen mango for your smoothies and stuff. Though you can in the frozen food section. Oh, yeah, frozen mango. They get the frozen mango for your smoothies and stuff, so you can use that.

That'd be a bit cheaper. Like other orange fruits and vegetables, they've got beta carotene and antioxidants, which fight off cellular damage. Right. It's orange fruits. Yeah. Okay.

Well, they've got the eating of them that have got that beta carotene in it, which that's why carrots, hey, carrots are cool. Is that? No. Carotene? I don't know. Does that mean you can eat carrots too for the same effect?

Don't know. Because you can go a little bit orange if you eat too many carrots. Another question. If I have like a mango frappuccino, does that count? No. No, no, no, no. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

I'd say this has happened around the world quite a bit with a lot of travellers being kind of stuck in different countries, not their home countries, and they're getting a bit homesick and finding it hard to maybe meet friends. So a German traveller is stuck in Port Macquarie in Australia. Oh, yeah. She's working as an au pair. So she was travelling and then the flights to get back to Germany

were so expensive that she took up a job as an au pair. Right, because a lot of people stuck here have been able to extend their visas, right? Yeah. What was it, working visas? Yeah. Yeah. So now she has spent the last nine months

only speaking to two children that she looks after. Oh, God. Or the single mum. So she's like, the single mum is the adult person that I speak to, and that's it. Other than Tinder dates that she's been meeting, but she's sick of the small talk. What's the population of Port

Macquarie? You'd get through that in a couple of weeks, wouldn't you? You'd say so. It probably takes you a night to swipe through everybody. Yeah. So she has taken to a community page to ask for adult friends because she has no way of meeting

people other than, I guess, Tinder, which is just a whole bunch of small talk. Yeah, and they don't want friendship normally, do they? A little bit more than that. Don't they? What are they after? Something else, Vaughan? Oh, not sex.

Oh, my God. She said, I'd love to catch up for a coffee, a day at the beach, nice walks, a movie, and to make some friends. Feel free to contact me. I'd be more than happy. That's so scary. Like, would you even? You know me, I would not do that.

I would not. You would not. I wouldn't even cope with Tinder because I have to meet someone I don't know and I'd be like, hi. Because even her old avenue of, say, meeting other travellers at hostels or, like, you know, backpacker bars, that's not possible anymore because of COVID. And she did have some backpacker friends, one from China, Germany and somewhere else, and they have returned home. So she's like, I meet these people and I get, like, a friendship, but then they go home. Yeah. So she's like, I meet these people and I get like a friendship but then they go home. Yeah. So she's looking for some adult

friends. I'd go and hang out at the koala hospital. If you just go to what Port Macquarie's got to offer. They've got a koala hospital. And then you might meet other like koala hospital people. Yeah. And then you get to play with koalas. Yeah, but they've got chlamydia. Oh, they do.

But that's good because then if you do you can blame the koalas. Yeah, but they've got chlamydia. Oh, they do. But that's good because then if you do, you can blame the koalas. You just bought it off them. Sure. There's a surf club. It's like a home and away-esque. Oh, okay. Surf club you could go to. Tell you what, they've got more than their fish are golf courses.

There's an aged retirement village. You could get in on somebody's will if you play your cards right. Just looking at some different options here. How long do you think it would take you get in on somebody's will if you play your cards right. Just looking at some different options here. How long do you think it would take you to get into somebody's will? See, I don't know. Like turn on the old Smithy charm. Yeah. Probably with old mates quicker than their wives.

Yeah, right. Talk about lawns and veggies and... Yeah. Actually, I just want to move into a retirement village. Socialising isn't compulsory, but it's an option if you want. and veggies and... Yeah. Actually, I just want to move into a retirement village. I love that. Socialising isn't compulsory, but it's an option if you want. And it's, yeah, nice, quiet socialising.

Yeah. And the grounds are always really well kept because I think everybody there just likes to chip in and pull out a weed if they see it. And they're all nosy like you two. Yes. Actually, why don't you just live in a retirement home now? Yes, it'd be quiet. Everyone goes to bed early.

I imagine some of those old boys wouldn't be afraid of a bottle of scotch if one fell in front of them. Good times. The internet would be fast because no one else is using it. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. So as I said, if you take your phone to the toilet, there is an increased risk of surgery.

What about iPad? Yeah. Because the better games are on the iPad sometimes. The iPad would fall under the same umbrella. Maybe the newspaper, depending on... Oh, I think I know what you... You spend too much time there, and it's the stress. The doctor told me this.

Did he? Yeah. He's like, old doctor. Old mates take the newspaper to the toilet and sit there for way too long and that downward pressure stretches your bum out and gives you hemorrhoids.

Yeah, that's exactly the problem. And you need surgery. So young people have been heading into with this condition and they're like, well, why are they getting this? This is not what, it's not something that young people have to deal with usually. Right. They are requiring an emergency hemorrhoid thrombectomy. Well, that doesn't sound pleasant.

They've developed huge hemorrhoids because they're sitting on the toilet for 20 minutes or more. That is so you, dude. Playing games or on Instagram or something. And yeah, it's putting stress on your... So if you're straining a lot, that's how you'd get hemorrhoids. Or if you're sitting there and putting a lot of stress on the area, you can get hemorrhoids.

That's why you need a high-fibre diet. Get it out. And quick toilet times. Yeah. But then even if you do have a high fibre diet, if you're still sitting there afterwards because it's your quiet place. Yeah. Still stretching. Put the seat down. Like do your poop and then put then flush. Or go sit

on the couch. Like normal people do. You can't lock the couch, can you? You can't lock the lounge room and have privacy and just your own time. We don't know what that's like, Fletch. No. You'll find out. You'll learn.

I don't understand wanting to sit in your own stench. Especially your stench. Yeah. That's quite targeted and very rude and I won't stand for it. Yeah, that seems nasty. But just like, just be wary because it only takes 20 minutes each time for you to potentially hurt yourself. Yeah, the stretching of the downward and the push out and everything.

Give it the old heave ho. White, flush, put the seat down and just chill on the actual flat part. It provides support. If you need to hide from your family. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Well, a poll has revealed that 37%, a third of Americans in a relationship, they say they are hiding a secret stash of money

from their significant other. What for? Like your getaway fund? Escape money, yeah. Really? Really. I've thought about that, but I'm just like, how are you going to get the money out?

But it's for stupid things. And then also once you buy the stupid things. You've got to explain where the stupid thing came from and how you paid for the stupid thing. I know someone that every time they go to the supermarket would do the self-serve checkout or the checkout and then get like 20, 40, 60. But what for?

Just for like secret purchases, stuff they wanted to buy. But then would their partner never see that stuff? Well, no, because it would just come out of supermarket. No, no, no, but then they'd purchase the silly thing and the partner would be like, hey, where did this come from? I just don't guess. I just, but then they purchased the silly thing. Oh, yeah, yeah. And the partner would be like, hey, where did this come from? I just don't guess. I just guess they weren't paying that much attention. Well, then you could have just.

Like, Mr. Toyboy doesn't see half the stuff Megan buys. No, he does eventually. And then I have to try and do that. Oh, I bought that ages ago. Ages ago. And see, it's sitting in the wardrobe. It doesn't have tags on it. Look, yeah.

See? You know? If you want to go the extra, put a little stain on it. They're like, remember, I spilt food on it that time I wore it last time. That's why I haven't worn it for a little while. No, and put it back on him and be like, I asked you about this. I showed you and you were like, that's really nice. He's like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because he doesn't want to sound like he's not paying attention. That happened to me yesterday. He thinks he's losing his mind. Yeah, show me. I wonder when those chairs we ordered are going to arrive. I was like, what? She's like, you know those chairs? Like Renee's chairs.

I was like, we never agreed that those were to be ordered. She's like, are you kidding me? I was like, no, no. No, but sometimes that's legit. And you're like, are you serious? I think I said I liked the chairs, but that shouldn't sign off on the purchase of aforementioned costly chairs. No, that's different than saying, do you want to spend this much money on those nice, lovely chairs?

Yeah. But she said, no, remember I said I can pay now and like pay like 60% of it now. And then when they get delivered, you get the final one. I was like, that doesn't sound like someone got a great day. And I was like, kids, do you remember this? They were like, um, and then Sade looked around and gave them a look, and they were like, yep. I was like, what's this non-communication look here

that gets everybody on mum's side? Big conspiracy theory in my house at the moment. Big conspiracy theory. But are they talking like shoebox of cash scrolled away? Imagine finding a shoebox of cash and your partner's in the wardrobe. You were like, oh, you knocked it over and cash came out. You'd be like, oh. What would you do?

Yeah, I mean, it doesn't say how much people are squirreling away. Oh, gee. It's not like thousands. It might be a couple of thousand. Right. But it's not enough to like go start a new life somewhere. Right. It's enough for...

It depends. $2,000. It's very cheap. Well, yeah, if you could get to Thailand $2,000, you'd get a... What? Like a little... I mean, you're probably not going to be saying anything nice. You'd get a little crate wagon and then you start selling crates

and then the money starts rolling in, baby. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. From the vulnerable ZM Think Tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Amazon Echo Frame smart glasses are on sale. Why are people still trying with these smart glasses? I don't know. Because I guess, I don't know,

it makes sense, right? Like, we've got watches. Yeah. Phones are always on us. Google had a real good go at it, and everyone just thought they were pervy, didn't they? Yeah, but also the Google glasses didn't look... From what I remember, they didn't look...

They were very obviously something happening. Yeah, Snapchat had a go, and they look... They were very obviously something happening. Yeah, Snapchat had a go and they failed. They also looked terrible, though. The Echo Frame smart glasses, the only thing is the arms are a little bit thicker. Oh, yuck. No, those aren't...

Because have you seen that? I think Bose do them as well, and they're big like... They're sports kind of sunglasses, but the arms are real big. Oh, the arms are really thick. Is that where the speaker is? Yeah, but the arms are real big. Oh, the arms are really thick. Is that where the speaker is and the arms in this situation? Nobody needs that.

Yeah, yuck. They look yuck as well. Very thick on the sides. You've got two little speakers on the side of your head. Like, just wee headphones. So it's called an Echo Frame, and it's basically like an Amazon Alexa. So you can be walking along. Yeah.

And you can get little heads up on the frames as well. See, surely we're not too far away from just having that on our eyeballs, right? Like contacts. Like our phone just speaks to our eyeballs and we've got like one of those fighter pilot displays. I can be like, Megan, steer clear. And it's got your height, your heartbeat, your favourite food, your Uber rating. Does it just come up as like a little projected screen?

Yeah, like a black mirror. Like Terminator. Yeah. We need scan paper and be like, I need your clothes, your boots and your motorcycle. Like that. Yeah. Well, I've your clothes, your boots, and your motorcycle. Like that. Yeah. Well, I've got the top six other smart wearable tech.

Number six, smart scrunchies. Because they look like, you know, it's got a bit of an 80s vibe to it. Yeah. And you put it in and it basically vibrates sound through your hair into your brain. I'll be down for that. Yeah, like it's in there. Yeah. You could be like, ring, ring. You'd be like, boop, touch the scrunchie.

You're like, hello. And it's like vibrating into your brain so you can hear it. Wow. I like that. And it would also be, it could send you little alerts to your phone like, I'm slipping a little bit. I think it's time you redid your hair. So you know how they start to slip and get a bit loose.

Number five on the list of the top six smart wearable tech ideas are smart earrings oh yeah which like actually though because you could be like boop and it could be

on your ear anyway so yeah could have a little speaker in it and talk to your ear yeah sure and it can do things like

monitor heat and stuff and those flesh tunnels you know the yeah some people had the big loop earrings. That could be like a Dyson bladeless fan. How good for summer. And that could just keep your neck cool.

Yeah. And maybe like blow air down your shirt, which would be nice. It would be cooling. Number four on the list of the smart wearable tech ideas I've had today. Smart hats. This is for the bald dudes who can't wear the smart scrunchie.

Okay. It's just basically the smart hat. Okay. And it's all around your head. Same thing. Measures temperature. Probably gets a pulse off the old temple there.

That's actually not... Why is that not being done? Because, like, there's a lot of area to hide speakers and stuff in if you did a smart hat. Yeah. Would you need speakers if it was sitting on your brain?

It would just vibrate through your skull, eh? Yeah. And you wouldn't need it. Easier than glasses, more room. Yeah. And where would the battery, the battery could be in the button on the top. Yeah.

Or in the peak. Solar panel. Solar panel. Yeah. Solar panel. Great idea. Just going to make that not look like one of those big square solar panels that you see on people's roofs.

Number three on the list of the top six ideas for wearable smart tech, smart rings. Oh, yeah. Like around your wedding ring. You could have like a little. Now that I'm saying that, I think somebody had a ring for measuring their heart rate. Oh, really?

Wasn't there a ring? I don't know. And did that connect to their phone? Maybe. Maybe it did the old Bluetooth connect. Number two, smart belts. Basically like Batman's belt. Just a belt with lots of accessories in it.

Gadgets. Yeah. Bits and pieces like a Swiss Army knife, but a belt. And also you need to charge it every night. Imagine walking into someone's house and their belt plugged in at the wall. Wouldn't be able to take that on a plane. No. No.

Well, as long as it was in flight mode. And number one on the list of the top six smart wearable tech ideas to follow up these new Amazon glasses, smart masks. Everyone's wearing masks. Get some tech in there. But most importantly,

it can be actively rating how bad your breath is and send updates to your phone of when it's time to brush. Imagine brushing, putting it back on and they're like, give that another go. You've not really done that properly.

Your breath is quite confronting wearing a mask. You're just like, I did brush my teeth this morning. But yeah. Wow. And then because you're breathing into the mask

and it sticks to your face, you can smell it for quite a while after you take it off. Better than COVID though. That's today's top six. So a woman has done that thing where you think everyone's going to agree with you and you put it on the internet

and then suddenly not everyone agrees with you. Oh, I like those. Yeah. So tell me your thoughts on this. And then when everyone tells you their thoughts. You're like, I don't want your thoughts. Get all defensive. I only want opinions that agree with my own, even though

I may have indicated I was after a general opinion. So she's from the UK and she shared a very short text conversation between her and a tradie. Okay. So, it's important to tell you that this text was sent

at quarter past midnight. She sends a message to a carpet fitter and says, Hi, could I have a coat, please? A carpet, like a carpet layer. Yeah. Do they call them carpet fitters in the UK? Yeah, maybe. Okay.

Carpet layer. They are fitting the carpet to a roof. Yeah, I think fitters better. They layer it. But they lay it. They do lay the carpet. Then they fit it. Well. Yeah, I think. And then they layer it. But they layer it. They do layer the carpet. Then they fit it. Or no, they fit it and then they layer it. Because you have to cut it.

Oh, no. No, you would fit it. No, because you roll it out and you attach it and then you cut it and you... But, I mean, you have like a rough idea of what size you're needing. You don't just bring in a big reel of carpet. Carpet installer? Yeah. Most of them are layers.

When I've Googled carpet fitter, most of them have come up carpet laying. Okay, but we can agree that the person that puts the carpet in there, they must. Yes, we can. I think that's semantics. Okay.

So this was seen at quarter past midnight and the carpet fitter layer, whatever, responded straight away and said yes. Here's a quote. Who asked for carpets at 12.15am? It's weird because it's a text message. If that was an email or an inquiry through a website, that'd be fine. It'd be fine. Because that might have woken that person up when it came through as a text.

It still blows my mind that people don't sleep with their phones on silent. Well, like, yeah, bedtime mode and everything. Bedtime, yes. Like, when it gets to the time, it turns itself on to silent, right? Yeah. So, yeah, that's one of the responses that people gave, that had she sent an email, had it been some other way other than the phone, it would have been fine.

But someone said, you literally asked what people thought. Now you're getting mad that they gave their opinions. I'm a business owner. My phone is muted after hours. The message is clear. Return calls should be made appropriately. I've found that responding to qual concerns off hours sends the wrong message and invites more of the same. So he's saying turn your phone off and then respond at a normal hour. Yeah, that's what I'd do. But still, you can't make business calls or messages on someone's phone after hours.

Like, you'd wrap it up at 6pm, surely, at the latest. Nah, but what about 8? Unless they specify that they work or the work means they are later. But they could be at home with their family. Like having dinner or putting the kids to bed or something. Yeah, but they just leave it unread

until they can deal with it at another time. But I personally wouldn't message somebody that late. No, not at quarter past midnight. But then if I received one, I just wouldn't deal with it until the next day within my working hours. I don't think I'd fire back, yeah, here's a quote. Because you've also got to think about

the fact that that person will be paying you at some stage if they choose you. Yeah. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with customers and stuff. I just couldn't do it because I don't have the patience. Yeah. But, I'm so glad I don't have to deal with, Oh my God. like customers and stuff. I just couldn't do it, eh?

Because I don't have the patience. Yeah. Like, I'm free of that now. I'm a big fan of telling people that I think they're being silly. Then they never come back. Yeah.

Exactly. Which would be problematic. Oh yeah, I'd have a one star Google review if I had a business. I'd be the faulty towels of whatever business I was running.

Or you'd switch it around and be one of those places where people go to get abused. They know that that's going to happen. That's your shtick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They come for that

specific purpose. You'd be great at that. Yeah. Or they come to watch you yell at people. I'd imagine most people who go to Hell's Kitchen or those filmings

with Gordon Ramsay, they just want to see Gordon Ramsay blow up at people. Or they've not gone to HR, eh? I don't know. I don't know. I don't have a sign something on the way in being like,

you know that this is going to happen. And telling like HR that someone put bread on either side of your face and called you an idiot sandwich. What are they going to say? HR just went, oh, just give me a minute. I'm just going to go to the back office and they get back. They're like, that is so good. Well, I'm sure that tradies have lots of stories about this kind of thing.

We want to know unreasonable clients that you've dealt with. Yeah. What are some of the requests, the messages? It doesn't have to be tradies. Just any customer that you deal with, what's your like craziest story? Yeah. From these clients and customers yeah and maybe you have had calls and text messages after midnight and insane hours yeah even after it's the latest you call someone like seven I wouldn't call any later than that I wouldn't

call definitely not yeah a woman in the UK sent a text to a carpet layer at midnight asking for a quote. Yeah. And he sent back a not very nice message. People are torn on which side they stand on. Is that appropriate or not? But we wanted to hear about unreasonable client or customer requests. Yeah, maybe you have to deal with customers every day in your job. Some messages coming through.

Karen's messaged in. It's 2020. Your phone's a computer now. My only admin time is at midnight when everyone's in bed and I can do my emails, which includes inquiries to tradies. It's their issue if their phone's on. Yes, but email. But a text is considered an email these days.

No. No. I don't think so. No, no, no. See, I can kind of divide there. I'd send an email. I wouldn't send a text to someone I didn't know after midnight. Definitely not.

No, not on business. Nah. Yeah. But then I kind of get this, who has their phone on loud when they're going to bed? Maybe there's a reason why they have it on loud. You don't know. Just don't send it so late. They have a dependent, someone that could call them.

Yeah, but you add that person to your friends list and they can get through. Yeah, but not everyone's as tech savvy as you. I'm just playing devil's advocate. Yeah, right. Someone said a parent from an early childhood sent a text at 8.30pm to ask about an item of clothing that the child had been wearing all day that day that had not come home with him. 8.30.

It's getting in. Plus, like, do it tomorrow. Deal with it tomorrow. Yeah, it'll be on lost property if it's going to be there. It's getting in. Plus, like... Like, do it tomorrow. Deal with it tomorrow. It'll be on lost property if it's going to be there. It's not going anywhere, is it? Ella, what happened? So, I'm a truck driver, and I was going up to the farm, like,

to see this real old guy to take out some fertilizer. And I get out of the truck to go talk to him. And he comes over, and he's like, oh, so, you know, where's the man that drives the truck? And I was like, oh, it's me. And he's like, no, no, no, it's the man, you know, he drives the truck.

And I was like, no, no, no, you're talking to her, it's Ella. And he, like, rang my boss and got him to get to my house. It was very embarrassing. How odd that a woman would drive a truck. Do you even know how to handle that, Ella?

Like, do you know what you're doing? It's ridiculous, isn't it? So what did he want to take over? Did he want to drive? Because he has a penis, and that obviously qualifies him significantly better. Because that drives the truck. Yeah.

Well, you've got to put your penis into the truck to get it to go, Megan. If you don't have a penis, how are you going to start the truck? It's got that little hole under the steering wheel where you've got to put your penis in. Yeah. It's obvious. Yeah. Yeah. steering wheel where you've got to put your penis in. A zombie-er.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It is. Ella, thanks for your call. Somebody text messaged in, I'm a property manager, and it's insane. I got a call at 2.15 a.m. on Saturday for someone who wanted to view a house. Not from someone in one of the houses that was having an emergency.

Someone who wanted to view a house. Because, yeah, if, say, the building was flooding, you'd ring the property manager. Yeah, be like, that's okay. Yeah, we need your help. It's two in the morning. And the property manager's like, okay. But not just some person who's like, hey, ring, ring, ring, ring.

Hello, I've seen a house. I want to view it. What the hell? That's crazy. That's next level. Okay, so here's someone who has their phone on loud to answer your question. I have my phone on loud on the weekends in case any of my mates are ever in trouble

and need a ride home from town. Aw. Yeah, they can ring twice and it goes through. Yeah. So you can have it on silent and then if they ring once, it doesn't wake you up and then the second call wakes you up. That's a setting.

Yes. Because then that assumes That's a setting. Yes. Because then that assumes it's an emergency. Yeah. Someone said, I worked at a 600 bed hospital and a patient later complained because I wouldn't take their egg request seriously. They wanted eggs sunny side up every morning. And that was not something that I could facilitate as the eggs were made in bulk. You're in hospital,

you're not in a cafe. Hospital. I had a demanding customer call my boss saying as a business owner she should not have been allowed to go on maternity leave. What?

Because she owned the business. She had a responsibility. Oh, right. And that's why you hire people you trust, right? Yeah. Fletchvorner Megan. The podcast.

ZM. Stepping up toner Megan, the podcast, ZM. Stepping up to the podium for the 10th year of Nauru. Your gold medalist. Where's my medal? Where's my medal? It celebrates small accomplishments. Yeah. We have three stories and then we award medals,

gold, silver and bronze for accomplishments that we think are fantastic for this week. Commencing Monday, 23rd of November 2020. We welcome first to Where's My Medal, Abby, good morning. Good morning. Now, Abby, what did you finally do? Wow, are you ready for this one? Yeah. Wow, are you ready for this one? Yeah I put all the clothes away that were sitting on top of my drawers

inside my drawers Wow Yes Wow Thank you What was on there? Give us a sample of what sort of clothing you rifled through and sorted out

So there was about a three week backlog of me being lazy and not putting them back into my drawers. Because, you know, I don't have one of those chairs that everyone has at their store. Yeah, that's why I didn't get a chair for my room. I was so tempted. And I was like, no, because you just ends up being the clothes chair.

Yeah. Yeah, well, I've got a clothes drawer that clothes sit on and don't go in. Yeah. Right, so when you'd been needing clothes from that pile over the last three weeks, you'd just kind of been pilfering through them on the spot for what you were after? Yeah, well, it kind of got to the point where I couldn't get into my drawers.

Good achievement. Really good achievement. Really good achievement. Thank you. That's a great pencil. Vaughan, you've got a great pencil there. Yeah, I do actually. I a great pencil. Vaughan, you've got a great pencil there. Yeah, I do, actually. What is that pencil?

I got this pencil when we were in Queenstown at the QT. Oh, that's a lovely pencil. It's a really nice pencil. Okay, well, back to Abby's close. Sorry, Abby. And look at that, it's got a full eraser on the end. Oh, that's a lovely pencil. Thank you.

Erin, good morning. Morning. Morning. Now, tell us why you deserve a medal today. So after two weeks of procrastinating after joining a gym, I finally got up at 4 o'clock this morning to get there to go at 5 o'clock. Yay! So I like that you joined it and your first two weeks you didn't go.

Well, to be quite honest, I don't want to sit in that commuter traffic, so I decided 4 o'clock in the morning was a good time to get up and leave. Yeah. Good work. Because normally it's the other way around. You join a gym and you go for two weeks, and then you don't go forever. Yeah, I've been a bit injured, so I figured I'd probably sort that out. What did you do at the gym today?

So started off with a good 3K walk on the treadmill. Okay, nice. And then another 3K rowing. Oh, 3K rowing. That's decent. That's more than right. What's your technique like on the row? Because I know Megan's a real harsh critic.

She's made me a harsh critic of people's rowing techniques. So on the rower at the gym. Don't you hurt your back? That's actually real harsh critic. She's made me a harsh critic of people's rowing techniques. So on the rower at the gym. Don't you hurt your back? That's actually what's sore. So my biggest suggestion for me is to do the rowing. Okay. You've got to keep your back straight, don't you, Megan? Be very careful.

And the legs do all the hard work, don't they, Megan? The legs do the hard work, not the arms. And the arms do that little bit just at the end when the legs are straight. All right, Erin, wait there. Lizzie, good morning. Welcome to Where's My Metal? Why do you deserve a medal this morning? I picked up all the toilet rolls off the floor in the toilet

and put them in the recycling bin. How many empty ones? You just kind of start making another pile, don't you? You've got your pile of your toilet rolls to be used and your pile of cardboard rolls that have been used. Yeah. How many rolls were there, Lizzie? There was about six.

That was it. Wow. That's weird. I'm proud of you. Thank you. So what, were you on the toilet? I have a 12-year-old son and a fiancé, and I thought I wasn't going to wait around for them to do it.

So do they just finish the roll and chuck it on the floor? Yes. Oh, man. I had a mate that used to rip it up and flush it. No. I know. Oh, my God. What?

I know, sit there on the toilet when it was empty, rip it up and be popping it between his legs. No, don't do that. And then flush it. I was like, no, don't flush a hard cardboard. The three Ps. P, P, and paper. That's the only thing that goes down the toilet.

But what happened when you finished a roll? When I did? Yeah. Oh, sometimes I leave it too. And I thought maybe someone else might do it, but no. No, they didn't. All right, Lizzie, wait there. The judges will now confer.

Yeah. Chat. Well, actually, I'll write it down. The judges will now confer. Yeah. Chat. Well, actually, I'll write it down and I'll see if you guys agree. With your nice pencil. Yeah. Yes. That's good. Unanimous decisions all around there.

Right, ladies and gentlemen, it's time for the medals. And in bronze place. Bronze place, third place. Bronze medal. For putting her clothes away so she could use her drawers again, ironically, to store clothes. Abby, congratulations for your bronze medal. Oh, thank you so much. It was worth it, wasn't it?

Thank you. So worth it. Punching those socks together, folding the knickers. It went all worth it for a little bit of medal action. Today's second place receiving the silver medal in today's Where's My Medal? Week commencing November 23rd, 2020. For getting out there at 4 o'clock in the morning, doing 3Ks walking, 3Ks rowing. Let's see if she's back there again tomorrow.

Erin, congratulations. Woohoo! Thank you. Keep it up. How many weeks is it Until you get into a routine Three You've got to do it

Every day for three weeks 300 I don't know I've got it free Until the 18th of December So I'm tossing out Whether I keep going You go till then

You'll need a break You'll need a break Over Christmas I like your honesty I like your honesty Hey Erin Here's the good thing If you stop going

Then They'll call you three times a day to see why you've stopped going. Well, I can just put my phone on silent. Block the number. Yeah, block the number. All right. And that means the gold medal

for taking six empty toilet rolls from the toilet and depositing them into a, I hope, the recycling bin. Because cardboards can be good to hear. Lizzie wins today's gold medal. Yes! Yay! Congratulations, Lizzie. Well done.

Thank you. What's next for Lizzie in the area of cleaning up something in the house that was easy if it had been done at the time, but kind of got a bit of a backlog? I have a drawer that's covered in clothes that I could do. Talk to Abby. Like Abby. Yeah, Abby's got the inspiration.

If you need any inspiration there, Abby, the bronze medal today could help you out for sure. Congratulations. Congratulations. Making a big deal of small accomplishments. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan,

the podcast. No shadows, just give me a pig report. I said, my question line's basically, how are the kids? Good. How are the pigs?

And then she said, well, I tell you what, Hamlet is a fat little squalor. Bloody hell. That's why I was laughing when we just went to that. said, well, I tell you what, Hamlet is a fat little squalor. Bloody hell. That's why I was laughing when we just went to that. Now,

that's enough just light pig chat there. We need to check in with one member of the show who had some big news over the weekend. Yep. Big news over the weekend.

Oh, man. Yeah, so the DMs are shut, team. Don't go sliding into mine. That's right, ladies and gentlemen. Producer Jared is off the market. What about Tinder? Is that gone?

Oh, that's been gone for a couple weeks, I think. Is it? Yeah. Good man. I saw this. When did I wake up? Saturday morning or Sunday morning to this on Facebook? Would have been Sunday morning because it happened Saturday, Arvo.

Facebook official. Wow. Okay. You have a girlfriend. You made it official. Yeah. It's pretty exciting. And this was after

she fed you fake bacon. Yeah. Yuck. That was an interesting time. I've never seen pieces of wet leather frying in a pan before. Gummy leather. Faking and before. Can't be leather.

Faking and what? Tofu scramble. Tofu scramble and faking. See, I don't mind a tofu scramble. What? You heard eggs? No, yeah, but you have bacon and eggs in it. I don't think I would have minded that.

You have bacon and eggs in the tofu scramble. Yeah. Well, then you've eliminated the need for tofu. What? Ta-ta tofu. Eggs, bacon. That's the great thing about tofu scramble is it takes on any flavour you want it to.

Or no flavour at all. I give up. You know what else tastes like the flavour of something you might want it to taste like? The thing that you could eat instead. I'm going to describe how my tofu scramble takes on the flavour of eggs. Just eat eggs then. So Jared,

how did this come about conversation go down said day afternoon yeah cuz last what you were asking us like how should you ask her yeah I was trying to be all cute so we went to waipu cove for one of her mates birthdays yeah so then Friday night we were there and I met like half of her crew apparently I passed which is cool and then Saturday but hungover, went down to the beach, had a swim. And then I was like,

do you want to go for a wander? And she was like, yeah, right. Oh, that sounds like an engagement, doesn't it? Yeah, for a little walk. Okay, okay, yeah. So we walked down to the end and I was like,

so do you want to be my girlfriend? Yeah, you want to be my girlfriend. I might have said it like that too because I was feeling so awkward. Do you want to be my girlfriend? Do you want to be my girlfriend? I might have said it like that too because I was feeling so awkward. Do you want to be my girlfriend? Do you want to be my girlfriend? Yeah, and she was like, yeah, right? Yeah, right. Oh, it's nothing better at the moment.

Yeah, right. Yeah, so. She wanted to appear casual, but like it's a conversation someone needs to bring up. Especially when you guys are like meeting the fam and stuff. Yeah, so I'm hanging out with her dad and brothers again tomorrow night, going to a pub quiz. Is she going with you? No, just me and the boys.

Oh, that's some pressure. No, yeah, she's coming. That's some pressure? What if you don't answer enough questions? Well, last time I didn't go and they came last, so she'll be all right. She'll be golden. Or you do that thing where you really argue for an answer

and you get in like quite a heated argument and then when the results come through you were wrong you're like huh. Yeah that's happened before. Yeah right.

That's definitely happened before. And you've got to pick your round that you're going to take double points on and the dad's like sport let's just go we'll go sport and I'm a sport.

And then it's get there and it's not a question about the 1990s all black so he doesn't have anything. Oh shit. What is hockey? Is that the one

with the sticks is it? I don't know any answers to this one. Well I shouldn't have let dad pick the double points round should we? Well there you go

honeys don't slide into producer Jared's DMs. Yep. Shut up tight. Yeah. Welded shut. Why was that? Shut up tight.

Why is everyone looking at me like I've said something inappropriate? I don't know. It just sounded like it would be. It sounded like it should be inappropriate. Locked up. Yeah. Shut up tight. Sealed.

Sealed. Welded. Do not open. Okay. Why is it? It's not dirty. I'm just, yeah, it just sounds like. It's more an industrial approach.

Right. Okay. Like, imagine like he's a factory yeah and the the every day the the workers or in this case the workers represent the dms from the gals are just like filing in yeah but now the factory's shut now okay it's all automated right a new owner has come in and she's automated the process so the workforce has been fired now there's heartbreak there's famine yeah um and lots of people are having a foreclose on their mortgages because they don't have a job factory jared this is it and all because this one woman's coming and taking

taking all of the jobs and be like no mine greedy are you saying no more jared's to blame for unemployment at the moment. Unemployment of? The heart. Love. Love. Okay. From the factory. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's Fishy Tank. Season two. Backed by Vodafone Business. Well, if your side hustle could do with $5,000, you need to enter ZM Fishy Tank Season 2. It's banked by Vodafone Business. We did this just after the big lockdown.

Yeah. The great big lockdown of 2020. There was a few stories about how Kiwis had maybe lost their jobs or with the time at home had put more passion and energy and time into their side hustles, their little passion projects. We had hundreds of entries. Honestly, just couldn't get to all of them. So we're doing season two, and it is a chance for you to win more cash on the line,

all thanks to Vodafone Business, five grand, and an advertising package that we'll put together for you as well. So we have been taking entries. You can do this at ZM Online and it is time. First to enter the fishy tank is... We welcome Luke. Good morning, Luke. Oh, hey, how's it going?

Good, good. Now, what's your usual occupation? A winemaker. A winemaker? Is it a vintner? My ears are pricked.? Is it a vintner? My ears are pricked. You'd say a vintner? Yeah, or just a winemaker is probably fine as well.

You're right. You've got a zhuzhen up, Luke. Yeah, people must get pretty excited when you say you're a winemaker, Luke. Yeah, yeah, there's a few hands out, that's for sure. What's your specialty wine that you have a hand in? I think we do a really good Chardonnay here at Liveret Estate. Oh, Chardonnay. Yeah, that and Syrah, my two go-to.

Oh, Syrah. Okay. I love a Syrah. Now, Luke, what we're going to do is give you 30 seconds to pitch your side hustle, your business idea. Okay. And then after that 30 seconds, after you've explained, we're going to jump in with some questions. Yep.

All right. Are you ready? Here we go. Go for it. Hey, so I'm Luke. I'm from the Mount. I have two beautiful daughters who I read to every night before bed. Over the last five and a half years, I've read hundreds of children's books.

Some of them are really good. Some of them are boring. None of them have been about surfing. So me and my friend Nate, who is an awesome artist, decided to create a series of children's books about a grandfather, Pop, who teaches his two grandchildren to surf. Then he takes them on epic surf adventures around New Zealand. Oh.

Oh. That's so cool. That's what a cool idea. Yeah, yeah. It's just crazy there's none out there, you know. So it's such a favourite pastime of Kiwi's and kids love it. So let's let them dream about it at night by reading them cool books before they go to sleep.

Totally. Now do you have any like artists involved or would you be doing the illustrations? No, no, so I've got a really good friend Nate Balgin who's an awesome artist so you know to be honest kids books for me like there's two things that they've got to be and the first is have epic pictures and then I like a rhyme. So, yeah, my books have got a rhyme. So your book's written, you've got your illustration. If you won Fisher Tank, it would just be purely to get it published. It would be money into publishing.

Yeah, so we've been looking at options, but we'd like to keep it local. We want to get it published in New Zealand, but going down that route, it's a little bit pricier, but we want to keep it in-house in Kiwi, so. Wow, good on you, man. Yeah, that's all, yeah, we'd want to put the 5K into getting the book published, and then I think if we manage to be successful and get that 5K, we'd like to donate for every

book sold to Surf Lifeesaving New Zealand. Oh, what a good idea. You're a good man, Luke. I love it. It's a great idea. See, these are the kind of ideas we're coming in, getting in. Luke, thanks, mate. It's time to meet our second contestant.

Fluffing about in the fishy tank is... Catherine. Good morning, Catherine. Good morning. All right, so we're going to get a business pitch from you. What's your usual occupation? I am an office manager. Okay, so this side hustle is kind of, be honest,

are you doing a little bit during work time? Because I would. Sometimes, I mean, spreadsheet and stuff, yes. That was my immediate thought too. Yeah. Use the office printing. Sometimes. I mean, spreadsheet and stuff, yeah. That was my immediate thought too. Yeah. Use the office printing. Yeah. Bit of free stationery.

All right, well, we're going to give you 30 seconds, Catherine, to pitch your business idea, your side hustle for Fishy Tanks Season 2. Your time starts now. Okay, so our side hustle is 50 Best Feet. Your ultimate festival experience begins with your best friend. The range of pre-made boxes filled with practical items you need to survive a festival. Select a box based on your needs or build your own. Boxes will contain everything from glow sticks and glitter down to first aid bits and hangover cures.

The idea stemmed from myself and my bestie while we were missing festival life. We know that we always forget something and what is more critical than having a box with everything that you need in it. Wow, okay, the bestie bestie. So basically like a little kit, like would it all come in like a fanny pack? Yeah, so basically like a box that you can fill with a, well, put into a fanny pack or a bag and it's got everything that you could need.

So yeah, you shouldn't need anything else. Oh, I like that. That's a good idea. Even down to glitter and stuff, I love it. Yeah. Yeah, and definitely good Christmas gifts for festival goers. Yeah. Well, and that's the thing, nobody's going

overseas. They're all going to be going to festivals in the new year, aren't they? No, and we have been kind of waiting to launch, wondering if COVID was going to stop the festivals or not, but it looks like it's going ahead so we can carry on. Wow, okay, so if you

got the $5,000, you just put that into buying product and kind of launching. Yeah, so if you've got the $5,000, you just put that into buying product and kind of launching. Yeah, buying product and launching the boxes in the new year so that we can get people ready for festivals in the summertime. What an awesome idea. Wow, it is. Yeah, festy besty. All right, thanks for your pitch, Catherine.

And registrations are open for Season 2, Fishy Tank. It's backed by Vodafone Business. Up for grabs, that advertising package in $5,000 cash. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Recently celebrated 10 years married

to my lovely wife. I had a dream last night that we went overseas actually. Oh yeah. So it was a nightmare. Well no, we went overseas and we came back and I forgot we had to do isolation.

But then she wanted to isolate in a different hotel to me. They're hermophilus. She'd had enough of you. She's like, do we have to go together or can I get different quarantine facilities? She's fine with you normally, but when there's no getting away. Yeah, when you're locked in a room. Do you remember where you were quarantining in your dream?

I was very near the airport. Oh, okay. At Auckland Airport. I hope not. I hope it wasn't Jet Park. That's the one you don't want to be. No. That's a bad sign.

Anyway, we weren't. That was just a dream. But anyway, one thing did happen over the weekend. She was on social media and she said, oh, because we've got a friend who, quite a secretive friend. A friend that doesn't, not one of those friends that will tell you what their plans were, perhaps. Oh, I can totally know what that's like. A lot like you, actually. Yeah, right.

Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. You have a long weekend and you're like, what are you doing? Yeah, where are you going? None of your, and they literally say none of your business. Well, no, Fletch says that. They just don't tell you they're doing anything. And then you'll see on social that they're away. Because it gets talked about on the radio if you say anything.

Yeah. That would be if this was you. But to reiterate, it's not. It's not me. Definitely not you. So friend, aforementioned friend, sent us a video, like a small friend group, a video of where they were. Okay. And then later

in the piece, put up a video more for public, more for not a very close friend, but for other people that they know. And it was pretty much the same video. However, my wife said to me, now did you notice this? And she had done some

great online detective work. Yeah. And she said, when we got sent the video, it was for the small private group, two pairs of shoes at the door. Now, when the general video got put up, one pair of shoes at the door. A pair of shoes had been removed to indicate to the wider audience that that person was there alone. However, the two pairs of shoes in the earlier video would indicate that they weren't.

I didn't even know there was two videos. I believe I only got sent the one video. Interesting. Interesting. So there was another video that had extra pair of shoes. An extra pair of shoes. And I said to Sade, shit, I love you. Like, that's good stuff. Good spotting. Shit, I love you. Shit, I love you. Like, that's good stuff.

Good spotting. Shit, I love you. Shit, I love you. Good work. For her detective work. Great detective work. You two are the nosiest gossipers that I know. We're really good.

If we want to know anything, we're like, hey, Smiths. And we'll be like, we'll see what we can find out. We're on it. We're on it. We'll put the feelers out'll see what we can find out. On it. We're on it. We'll put the feelers out and see what we can find out. It was just one of those moments where you're like, yeah, shit, yeah. I love you. This is why. We've been together 10 years. And then I was like, all this

detective work's got me in the mood. What about you? And she's like, God, no. Do you want to quarantine at different facilities again? Yes, I do. But it got me thinking about when you have those little moments with your partner and it's not like, oh, he's turned up with flowers and oh my god, that's so nice.

One of those things that's just, you're like, yes! Like maybe it's your little specific thing, they do something and you're like, yes, should I love you? Those should I love you moments. Do you have one of those for Mr. Toyboy? I did have one recently but I don't want to tell you because I just don't want to start that.

No, we won't. It would be unlike us to react, wouldn't it? What reaction do you want? Low-key reaction? No, I don't want your reaction. Just tell us. We're friends here. No, okay.

So there was a little argument about someone brought up um everyone's so invested in this now it's gonna be it's gonna be a real like let down let down the story no um there was an argument about um a man cave where the guy should have a man cave and he said that he doesn't require a different room in the house to get away from me. And he doesn't understand why. He's like, does she get a woman cave then? And I was like, should I love you? Oh, right.

So he was like. He was defending. Men shouldn't get preferential treatment. He's like, you spend all your time trying to find a woman and then you propose to her and you go through with it all and then you're like, right, I need to get away from you. I knew I didn't need to know that. There's the she shed movement.

Yeah. You could have a shed. Also, Mr. Toyboy is totally going to need a shed when you have a baby. To get away from me or the baby? Everything. Everything. He'll dig a bunker if he has to. Just run to your house.

We're talking about when you had a moment with your partner, a shit-I-love-you moment. Somebody else said we call this a mutual fist-bump moment. A fist-bump moment. Okay. Which is a bit of a mutual one. My husband and I share them every time we make the same joke at the same time about someone. Yeah, that's good stuff.

Yeah, that feels real good, eh? Yeah. Well, yesterday when we were at Yum Char and Sade said, can you pass that? And I knew she wanted the steamed buns before she even said it. And I passed the steamed buns. She's like, how did you know? I was like, baby, I know.

Baby, I know these things. I know these things. Yeah. Somebody just sounds like their partner did all the hard work at the weekend. My partner shoveled 10 tonne of lime paths at the rental property. 10 tonne of lime paths. What is this rental property? We're renting out a botanical garden.

Crushed lime. Oh, is that? Don't do that if you've got sheep, guys. If it gets into the water, you'll have toxicity issues, okay? It's just a little lifestyle block. Knowledge that I've picked up along the way. Right, okay. So we want to know from you when you had a sort of a shit I love you moment.

Somebody said, I have one of these every time I order medium fries, but my partner comes back with large fries. Oh, he knows. He knows. Only because he's sick of that thing that everyone does. You finish your chips first and then you want to get in theirs. And you say, I was going to order you large, but you only want a medium. You do this, Megan, don't you?

Every time. Yeah, because you don't want a whole thing of chippings. Well, you don't want to admit that you want fries. You won't even order fries. And then you eat the other fries. Elise, what was the moment that you had with your partner? When I got home from work, got out of corporate gear, checked on my sweatpants, and my husband goes,

you look good in sweatpants. You should wear them more often. And you went, shit, I love you. Exactly. Breeza, what did he want? I know. Wow, nothing that I found out anyway. But yeah. Right, okay. He didn't even want anything. Amazing. Wow. Nothing that I found out anyway. But yeah.

Right. Okay, brilliant. He didn't even want anything. Amazing. What a top life. What a tip there. Thanks, Elise. Some more text messages.

My boyfriend turns on the electric blanket each night and tucks my pyjamas into the bed so that when I get my pyjamas, they're nice and toasty from the electric blanket. Oh, that's a good hack, actually. I never thought about that. Or pop your pyjamas in the microwave and give them a 45 seconds. With a glass of water. Or not at all, I'd say. They'd just melt into a puddle, wouldn't they?

Yeah, that's true. Emma, what was the should I love you moment that you had? Oh, hi. My husband and I were at a restaurant and we ordered up at the counter and the lady passed us number 8 and we both looked at the counter and the lady passed off number eight and we both looked at each other and said the classic 90 Simpson quote,

number eight, burp, by Barney. And I just looked at her and I was like, shit, we've got humour together. Shit, I love you. Shit, I love you. That's Barney Gumbel references, never fuck. Brilliant, thanks you, Cool Emma. I spent the weekend with some friends

who had very old-fashioned views on roles of the husband and wife in the marriage. My husband came up, gave me a hug and said, you're so much more than a housewife. You're the smartest woman I know. And from now on, I'll be making the daycare lunches. Oh, shit, I love you. That's, I mean, until the kids are like,

Dad's having a yuck. And Dad's like, oh, well, you try these things, don't you? Anyway. So there was a good one in here. Let me find the good one in here. I recently had surgery. No, this isn't it, but I'm still searching. I recently had a surgery and my husband bought me a stool

so that I could climb in and out of his car. That's pretty. And then when you're in, he puts the stool in the car and then when you get out, it gets a little... I had my hip surgery and my husband organised

the seat to go over the toilet. That's love, eh? My little throne. And then he'll just keep it for when you're way older than him and need help onto the toilet as it is.

It's called an investment, Megan. There was a current affairs show and they had a dog up on the presenter's desk. This is the one I was looking for. There was a current affairs show. They had a dog up on the presenter's desk. My partner turned to me and at the same time we both said, I hope the dog shits on the desk.

And we said it at exactly the same time and that's when you knew we were a match made in heaven. Shit, I love you. Shit, I love you. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is if the Earth was 50% larger, we wouldn't be able to get off it using rockets.

Ooh. How would we get off it? Well, we probably wouldn't. Well, I don't know. Slingshots. Gigantic slingshot rockets. Nah. That probably wouldn't work either, either.

Okay. Slingshot rockets. I'll start slingshots and then the rocket kicks in. Yes. Ooh. It sounds good in theory but what if the rocket starts going when you slingshot it

and then that rocket kicks in and just fires it straight back to Earth. To Earth, yeah. Yeah, I mean, it means our gravity would be,

we probably wouldn't be, we'd be like another 50% heavier. Oh, really? No, no, no. But like, good news is it'd probably crush us. Like, we wouldn't live as long no. But, like, in our body, well, good news is it'll probably crush us. Like, we wouldn't live as long

lives because it'd be hard on our organs and everything. And we've evolved to be in this particular amount of gravity. But we'd be stronger if we had to carry around that much weight. Right. And it would be harder work, so we'd burn more calories if we're looking for positives of weighing another 50%.

So, I didn't know this. This blew my mind. So if you took the total energy needed to get a rocket to Mars, you would use 50% of that energy in the first 400 kilometres. Oh, wow. With thrusters and stuff. Yeah, just to break Earth's gravity. That's how intense

the hold of gravity is on the Earth. You'd use 50% of the total energy needed to get to Mars in the first 400 kilometers. So someone used the Tysolovsky rocket equation. I think that's it. Named after famed Russian scientist Konstantin Konstantinovsky. That guy. Anyway, he worked out. he used maths and stuff.

So at the moment, the current percentage, and this is another thing that blew my mind. You know when you see a rocket on the takeoff and it's ready to go, if you broke down the total weight, 96% of the weight of that rocket would be the fuel.

4% is rocket, casing, humans, computers, tech, everything else that goes up there. 96% of that weight is wildly explosive. That's why when they explode, they go up. Yeah. Just in a tin can sitting on a tank of fuel. Yeah.

And a big roar, a gadoosh, away it goes. So at the moment, the radius of the Earth is 6,670. If it was 9,680, we wouldn't be able to get off it using the current rocket technology.

Wow, okay. It'd sputter out just because the time you built a larger rocket with more fuel to get through there, it just would, the size and everything

wouldn't work. It'd be more to push up, so it'd be harder to do. Lucky we can get up into space. It's lucky we're not 50% bigger. Lucky. We wouldn't be enough here. Being big isn't always great. You want the biggest planet, don't you?

What? No. One most sustainable life. Or it'd take longer for us to ruin it. It'd take longer for us to ruin it It'd take longer for us to ruin something that big wouldn't it Yeah So there's the positive So today's fact of the day is if Earth was 15% larger

We would not be getting off it Fact of the day Day day day day Yesterday, Sunday Yum Cha A little bit, sometimes a tradition in the Smith family If you've never been to Yum Cha Because I've had people message me being like, what is it? What are you saying? Yum Cha

It is like a traditional Chinese meal being like, what is it? What are you saying? Yum cha. Yeah, yum cha. It is like a traditional Chinese meal where, see, there's a place where the trolley goes around. Traditionally, I think trolleys get rolled around and you're like, yep, stop. I'll have that, that, that. What are the plates of? Yeah, do you want some dumplings? And you can be like, yep.

The place we've been going to recently since COVID, they just bring you out like this laminated piece of paper and there's things on both sides and it's got all the lists and you write how many of each one you want. And then they just start arriving. So that's pretty good. That's a better way to do it. That's good because sometimes, yeah, you might miss out on something

because you didn't see it go around on the trolley. Yeah. And you feel sorry for the person with the trolley that no one's getting anything off. Yeah. You're like, no. Because they have all the rubbish stuff. Or they have the desserts and you've only just started. Yeah. Yeah, they bring around the ice cream dumpling things. You're like, no. Because they have all the rubbish stuff. Or they have the desserts and you've only just started.

Yeah. Yeah, they bring around the ice cream dumpling things. You're like, oh. Yeah, but then you don't know if they're going to be mango pancakes when you finish your main. So you get a couple of mango pancakes at the start and you just let them sit. But the ice cream balls, you can't do that

because they'll start to melt. You want them cold. There's a whole lot to it. There's a lot of stress at Yum Char. There's no stress, baby. Just sit back. No, because I've always got one eye on the trolley. One eye, I'm eating, but I've always got one eye looking out for the new dishes.

It's got a hunter-gatherer vibe to it. You've got to be keeping an eye on the prey while enjoying the food that you have got for your family. Whilst overeating. Yeah. So yesterday when we arrived, Table 44, they said, okay, so you've got a choice. You can sit at the large family banquet table with a lazy Susan, which you will be sharing with others, or you can wait 25 minutes. We don't wait.

So that was fine. We sat at the table and some other families joined us and families left in that time. Now I was at... Oh, you were still there? We ate pretty quick, but that's the vibe. Everyone eats pretty quick at Yumcha. She's telling me it's Sunday, busy day, one hour limit. And I was like, we're not going to need that.

You keep the food moving and we will not be here for an hour. So we classically overordered because we arrived hungry and then just ordered it all at once. And the food just kept coming and coming. And then my daughters are like, I think we've overordered because we arrived hungry and then just ordered it all at once and the food just kept coming and coming and then my daughters are like, I think we've over-ordered and I say don't you dare say things like that that's a quitter's attitude, all this has got to be eaten the guy beside

me was quite a big dude and when we finished, he said to me I am so surprised you got through that all, where do you put it? And I was like, oh my God, thank you. That is a compliment. I said, shut up. I was like, that's a big compliment.

And she's like, no, he was calling me like a pig. I was like, a skinny pig. Or a skinnier than he imagined pig. Yes. Where do you put it all? That's what you say to a skinny person. I know. I know. No one's what you say to a skinny person I know I know

And I've never I've never No one's ever said that to me before Oh yeah That would be nice Yeah I mean I did eat An insane amount Because I was a bit dusty

I accidentally got drunk Playing PlayStation On Saturday night by myself That's a problem Because I sat down And I was like You know the biggest problem Is walking back and forward

To get drinks So I just sat down Filled my glass right up with ice, and then just sat there with a bottle of whiskey. I didn't have to move. And then when I did have to move to get out to go to bed, I was like, whoa. So I was a little bit dusty and really hungry. Oh, there you go then. Great.

Great feed. Good compliment. You wouldn't have taken that as a compliment, Megan? No, I would have loved that. Yeah, where do you put it all? But Sade thought it was only because he'd watched me being such a glutton. Yeah, right. And he gave it to me.

So she said, you had to have a negative thought to get it. And I was like, I don't care how a compliment comes. Wrapped or unwrapped, I will take it. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. So somebody's taken a look at divorce stats and then compared those with where those divorcees went on honeymoon, where those couples went. And there is a resounding, number one on this list,

is a resounding winner. Okay. I'm going to start at 12, because that's the location of your first wedding, Megan. Is it? Well, that didn't... Bangkok slash Thailand. Oh, yeah.

That's me too. That's you as well. That's... Yeah, that's quite low on the list. So that's followed by Cancun and Mexico, which is like the American Gold Coast. Yeah, right. It's the Gold Coast for Americans in Mexico. Right.

Buenos Aires. Okay. Be an interesting place to... Yeah. That's on my list still of places to visit. Have you not been there yet? Nah. Okay. Be an interesting place to... Yeah. That's on my list still of places to visit. Have you not been there yet? Nah. Okay.

I was meant to go this year. We don't talk about that. Dubrovnik is next on the list of the places that have the most divorces as honeymoon locations. But these are also just horrendously popular tourist spots. Very true. Very true. very true. So they have the most divorces because they have the most visits, right?

Yeah. Venice is followed by Dubrovnik, follows Dubrovnik. Santorini, beautiful. A lot of people honeymoon there. Beautiful, yeah. Lapland is next on the list. What is Lapland? It's where Santa lives. It's at the top of Finland, right?

Yeah. So a lot of people go for like the Northern Lights and that whole, you know, sleep in an igloo thing, that kind of thing and see the Northern Lights. Mauritius is next on the list of the most divorces for honeymooning spots. What number are we up to? So that is number five.

Okay. We're in the top five. Bali is next on the list. That would be massive for Kiwis, right? Yes. So would Bora Bora. That is third for the most divorces. Because you want to stay in an overwater bungalow thing.

Yeah. Super cute. But then they cheap out and you have an argument about how a honeymoon's a once in a lifetime thing. Next on the list. Now, I don't know if this is This may be a British Study That's compared these divorce rates But Morocco Marrakesh

Is next on the list Not a It's a place I'd love to go I've never been But I wouldn't have thought It screams honeymoon though No Unless there are some

I mean I don't know a lot about it Casablanca's up the road Right You know from the movie Oh yeah right That's quite like a famously romantic destination. And then if you go off the coast, there's like

the Canary Islands. So like Tenerife and that. But maybe what do you... But that's not Morocco. That's a Spanish territory. Yeah, I don't know. Well, the number one spot... I already know what you're gonna say. The number one spot, the most divorces for this honeymoon spot is the Maldives. Yeah.

To be fair, when I was there on my honeymoon, there was some honeymooners I'm like, you're not going to make it home. Oh, really? Married, yeah. Why are you arguing? So many public arguments. Oh, my God. Lots of Russians holiday there and were on honeymoon. Yeah, right.

And they argue very publicly from what I've witnessed. So, yeah, put it all on them. Put it all on them. No, not me. You'd think people would be going on a holiday before they honeymoon, right? Yeah. Because that's the way to tell if you can, you know. This isn't their first trip together.

No. No. Surely not. You've got to do you can, you know, if you're the first trip together. No. No. Surely not. You've got to do a light bit of travelling together before you marry someone. You've got to live together too. You've got to see that that's a compatibility issue. Going away for a weekend around New Zealand's a bit different

than your first big overseas. And what have you got to argue about in the Maldives? There's just sun and food and the beach. They're not taking the photo of you, right? Oh, yeah. How am I supposed to put this on the ground if you can't take a goddamn photo, right?