ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 26th November 2021

Episode Date: November 25, 2021

North Korea  Top 6: Judith  HOGO  Vaughans Self Serve Checkout  Matty McLean  How did you know you were about to be dumped?  Ian's Shoutout  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play. ZM's Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Barista made coffee available from drive-thru and McDelivery at level 3 and also dine-in at level 2. Nan's hurt herself. I haven't had a fall, but I've hurt my back.

Tell Vaughan how you did it How did I do it You were pushing your pram Oh no yeah Where So around where we live It's flat There's a slight incline

It's pretty flat though When you turn a corner There's a slight incline So I had to push the pram Like upwards a little bit So I arched my back And whoo wee Oh it pinged

Got a ping in my back man how bad's an arch and a ping god do you know what I don't want to it sounds like you've got what I've got which is the pinched nerve

and a slipped disc and if you've got that good fucking luck started down low and now it's right up my back oh see now maybe it's not that's not working to me

is that a that's an age thing though I look at us there's different things. You're both older than me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, but...

Yeah. Why is that age thing? Honestly, if I could go back and talk to my younger self, I'd be like, don't play sports because... I know. Like, I broke my ankle. I stuffed my knee. Like, I played roller derby and I shouldn't have done that.

That's what the sports doctor said to me. Did you play cricket when you were a teenager? I said, yes, a lot. And he said, well, that'll do it. I hope it was worth it. Where was that advice? It wasn't worth it. Where was that advice when I was like 17, 18, 19?

Ridiculous. So what sport would they recommend? Lawn bowls. Any sport that old people play now. Well, old people do a bit of a dip in the old lawn bowl. Is there? You go down, don't you? It's like a lunge. That can hurt your back. able to do a bit of a dip in the old lawn bowl. Is there? No, you go down,

don't you? It's like a lunge. That could hurt your back. It's like a lot of lunges. No, golf's bad because of how like the swing

and it's just over and over and over again. If you're going too hard at it, you'll hurt yourself. With lawn bowls, are you allowed to use that thing from Tenpin

that the kids use? No. To roll the ball down? The ramp. The ramp. That would be great. It'd go wobbly though. I don't think that would work though to be honest. I think they'd make an exception if you were a lifetime

member and all of a sudden you became wheelchair bound. They might do. They might make an exception because you get the last couple of bowls. Well, Megan will be fine. Don't fret dear listener because I've just popped into my pharmacy bag. The top flap of my zip. Oh what you got in there?

My bag. That's my pharmacy. I've got no ketamine. From your vet clinic? Pennies. There's anti-shit yourself pills. Anti-shit yourself pills? Yeah, I don't know why you guys. Ammonia.

Yeah, I've just had them in there for ages. Well, where was the offer of one of those before when I was all dosed up on vitamin C? Well, you didn't say you needed to. I rocked it off. Who's given me those anti-shit yourself tablets before? You never know because you've only got one song. You need to go to the toilet. There's not enough time.

You just clog yourself up with these pills. Oh, Jesus. No, I don't know if that's what they're for. But I've given Megan some anti-inflams. Thank you. So you take those and let us know how you go. Thanks. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan. Thanks, Rachel.

Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fleets, Vaughan and Megan. She's just got the headphones untangled. What a bloody tangly mess. Bigger mess than the bloody National Party. Am I right? Now, is it true, the rumours,

are they true that you will be putting your name into the ring? You're damn straight. As leader of the National Party. Yep. What they need is a white man. With arrogant sweet wazoo. Yes. And a loud voice to just talk over everybody.

Right. Who will your deputy be? Could you bring back Paula? Paula Bennett. People liked her. No, we're training the swamp. Oh, right. Okay.

Do you think you need some kind of influencer, female influencer maybe? Yep. Okay. Do you want me to name who I want as my deputy? I don't know. Who do you want as your deputy? Simone Anderson.

We're going to get the votes, baby. You get the Instagram vote. You get the Instagram vote. You get the Instagram vote. If that doesn't go well, I'm axing her. I'm getting Pebbles Hooper on board. Matoodles. Matoodles it are. They'll be my health and wellness ministers with that portfolio.

Health and wellness ministers. Yep. I love it. I love it. I have a bloody lot of them. You have a lot of them. Coming up on the show, 8 o'clock this morning, we start the Benny Ticket Blitz.

She's touring all around the country next year, kicking off her tour, going to places that don't normally get shows as well, which is great. So every hour, we've got a chance for you to win a double pass with our Benny Ticket Blitz. So listen out for that. The top six on the way.

Yeah, we're going to be dealing with this whole Judith Collins situation in the top six. I don't know how yet. All I've decided is it will be somewhat related to the Judith Collins situation. You'll be tackling the issue. Yes. Alright, next on the show. It's that time of year, Collins, the dictionary, have released the top

ten words from the year. You probably pretty much guessed the theme of a lot of these. Yeah. I reckon it's going to be bad. That's my thoughts. CDM's Fletchborn and Megan. The Collins Dictionary experts have released

their top ten words from the year. Which is like the dictionary? The dictionary? I don't know. You've got your Collins. You've got your Webster Miriam. Yeah, those are the main ones i don't know i guess it's like you got your collins you got your webster miriam yeah that's those are the main ones aren't they they're always the people releasing their life you've got your scrabble yeah i said that's not a dictionary no we know they do they scrabble have an official scribble dictionary do they yeah because and if you it's like in cricket if you

think you've been hard done by, you can call for the dictionary. But you've only got so many calls. Right. But then why not just use any dictionary? Or do they not allow that? No, it's a specific Scrabble dictionary. Here are the most well-known English dictionaries. The American Heritage Dictionary.

Okay. I'll try again. The American Heritage Dictionary. Okay. I'll try again. The American Heritage Dictionary. The Chambers Dictionary. Collins English Dictionary. Concise Oxford English Dictionary. The Macquarie Dictionary. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary.

The New Oxford American. The Oxford Dictionary of English. The Oxford English Dictionary. Those seem like we don't need both. It's a flooded market. Hugely flooded market. Random House Webster's Dictionary, shorter Oxford English Dictionary.

Oxford seem to be involved in a lot of dictionaries. Yeah. Well, they've got the Oxford comma, don't they? And Webster's third new international dictionary. Well, this is the Collins, and it does include the Collins 2021 word of the year. Okay. But we'll go from 10.

Regency core is... What? No idea. Regency core. Regency core. Core as in C-O-R-E. Yeah. Regency core is a style of dress inspired by clothes worn by the wealthy in the Regency period slash Bridgerton.

Ah, so Bridgerton. Okay, right. Regency. Number nine is ping-demic. Ping-demic. That will be about everybody on the internet, so the internet runs slow. Or knows that you're getting so many notifications that it's a

pandemic of our time and our wasted lives. Such vast numbers of alerts have led to commentators terming the phenomenon pingdemic. So it's like when you get, bing, breaking news, and you're like, oh, shit, a tsunami, and you click on it and it's like, old white guy's got a thought.

You're like, this isn't breaking news. Stop sending me notifications. I'm not looking at anybody in particular. Number eight in the Collins 2021 top ten words is neo-pronoun. Okay. Number seven,

metaverse. Yep. There's a lot of chat after meta. After Facebook changing their name to meta. Hybrid working.

Hybrid working. Like a bit of home, bit of at work. Oh, yeah, of course, yeah. New way to work in the pandemic. Number five is double vaxxed. What does that mean? I don't know.

It sounds dangerous though, man. Number four, crypto. I would have thought they would have been a book. Have I told you about my mother-in-law's into crypto? What? Of course she is. She's made 800 bucks in less than a week. What?

For everybody. And then next I get to be $2,000. And then it'll be $5. Yeah, yeah. She's not going to show you and it's not going well. No. Well, Ross Boss has been very quiet about his crypto, hasn't he? He's kept it very quiet.

Remember when he was making thousands? I think famously he bought high, sold low. Yeah. Which is the opposite of what you're supposed to do. So that was number four. But the top four are actually not to do with the pandemic. Right, words of the year. Okay.

So number three in the Collins words of the year, climate anxiety. Okay. It's a big one. I get that when I'm like, it looks like it could rain. Oh, I thought of me when you're like trying to decide the perfect temperature for the air conditioning. While you ruin the planet. Too hot for others, I can't do it.

Number two. Oh, chuggy. Made it into the top 10 words. I feel like that word kind of came and went. It's real strong and then it...

Even now, just saying it, it's like bleh. Chuggy's become chuggy. It's almost up there with moist. Ah. When I hear chuggy, I'm like, no, it's like bleh. Chuggy's become chuggy. It's almost up there with moist. Ah. When I hear chuggy, I'm like, no, I don't mind moist.

Chuggy I find harder on the ears than moist. That poor boy's making me chuggy in all the right spots. It doesn't work as well as moist, does it? No, I'm not saying replace it. You can't replace it. Yeah. You're just saying it makes you feel yuck. Yeah, the sound, it's very cringy.

But the number one word for the year, top words for 2021, the Collins Dictionary, is NFT. Oh, yeah. Increased 11,000%. Non-fungible tokens. Yeah. I saw somebody describe it as beanie babies for white dudes. Yeah. Better buy up those beanie babies.

They're going to be worth a fortune, baby. Now everyone's just got these bags of worthless shit beanie babies. That's your NFT. But, nah, good man. Spend $200,000 on it, I reckon. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Megan. But nah, good man. Spend $200,000 on it, I reckon. News that has been described as dystopia reacts to dystopia. A man in North Korea has been reportedly sentenced to death by firing squad for illegally downloading Squid Game,

the Netflix show that half the world, three quarters of the world has seen, and distributing it to the country's teenagers. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Like the irony there. Definitely, definitely put him to death. What a horrible man.

Okay, why? Oh, I know there's the North Korea, South Korea thing, but. Well, you're not allowed to watch anything that's... To death. ...produced outside, are you? But particularly from your neighbour that you hate. Like, they've produced this worldwide smash hit. Yeah, but we love Home and Away.

Aren't we? Yeah, yeah. No one's wanted TVNZ Commissioner to death because they have selected Home and Away. Well, if it was North Korea, maybe they would. Good Lord. What about the new Korean TV show that's taking over Squid Game? What's that?

Talked about that? No. In the days I was away? Haven't heard about it. Hellbent. Is that what it's called? Hellbent. Yes.

Hellbound. How does that work? Demons. Ultra violent. Korean style horror show, much like Squid Game, and everyone's just lapping it up. It is a hell of a year for Korean pop culture. Whereabouts is that?

You guys heard the gam-yam style? This guy called Psy, he's Korean. Yeah, yeah. I'm a bit late to this, apparently. There's a dance already, and people know it, but gang-yamnam styles all the rage. Gangnam. Gangnam.

Why? I can't. Gangnam. Gangnam. Gangnam. No, what are you adding a Y in there? Gang, gang, nam. Gang, nam.

I don't know. Something like that. I'm very well aware that that's an old song. I was being silly about Korean pop culture. I was just looking When did that come out BTS You guys like a bit of BTS

Or stop it Blackpink Blackpink I actually very much like Blackpink And there's a New Zealander In Blackpink Yeah That was 2012

Gangnam Style Yeah I know Gangnam Gangnam Gangnam Gangnam Gangnam Gangnam

It's a gang of yams That's how I think about it It's delicious Gangnam Yeah it's a gang of yams. That's how I think about it. It's delicious yams. Gang Yams. Yeah, it's 2012. Yeah, so this new show is terrifying people. So more people will be put to death in North Korea

if they smuggle in this one up to Rome. Where are you watching that? Where can you watch it? It's on Netflix. Oh. Yeah. From the vulnerable ZM think tank, this is the Top Six.

Judith Ann Collins, born 24th of February 1959, was the 39th leader of the opposition. And now she is no more. Yeah, she really took the pen out of the grenade and dropped it on the floor, didn't she? She dropped it on herself. It's good stuff. But she's out. Everyone's like

saying stuff. And I thought, well, what about the nice things? What about the good things about you? Yeah. Everyone's taking shots on the way out. Even her own MPs. You know? Your spineless slugs. You were all sucking up to the big lettuce leaf before,

but now that the lettuce has gone wilty, you're turning your back on it, you cowards. When she came in here for an interview pre-election, she was lovely, wasn't she? Yes. Remember everyone said I was giving her a sour face? I was like, no, that's just my normal... That's just your face.

My resting space. Puzzled. just your face. My resting face. Puzzled. She was lovely. She was nice. Yeah. Icy, though. Do you think icy? Like when a shark is nice at Kelly Tarleton's. You're like, oh, that's a nice shark.

She just had breakfast. Yes. Yes. But she wasn't going to be happy in full forever. Right, okay. Anyway, you're saying nice things. So I've got the top six nice things

I can say about Judith Collins. Okay. As soon as I know national MPs are doing it. Yep, okay. Again, I'll call them slugs. Yep. Oh, imagine being called a slug.

That's a horrible thing to be called. Yuck. You're not even a snail. Number six. On the nice things I can say about Judith Collins.

She pretended to remember my mum from school and my mum said that was total bullshit. That's right, because they went to school, didn't they?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was the year younger than my mum. But then I wouldn't remember. I remember the Holmeses. I remember the Holmeses. I remember the Holmeses. And mum was like, bullshit, she would.

But see, your mum went to school with Judith and you went to school with Jacinda. They're both no nonsense either. What can I say? Me and my mum and Judith, very similar. I can imagine your mum pulling that on Bridges yesterday. She would have dealt with it at the time. Yeah.

Deal with these things at the time. Number five on the list of the top six nice things I can say about Judith Collins. She looked lovely in blue. Yes. And I think that's essential for female leaders of the National Party. I've got to imagine if you were the leader of the National Party and you looked great in red. Controversy. Yeah.

She's the second after the ship, right? There's only been two female leaders of the National Party. Jenny Shipley, Megan, your cousin. The ship. Distant. She looked great in blue. The Crusher. I think I saw her in Farmers, the ship.

Former Prime Minister. Was she wearing blue? It was a really dark blue, yeah. And as you say, Vaughn, she looked great in blue. Yeah. Svelte last time I saw her. Real shit kicker. Really looks like she could go a couple of rounds.

Number four on the list of the top six nice things I can say about Judith Collins. You could tell when she was telling a joke because her eyebrows went up. I like that. I like to know when people are telling a joke. And she told us all, you can tell when I'm telling a joke because my eyebrows go up. Yeah. And so then you just watched for the eyebrows to go up. Even more. Yeah. And then you were like, well, no, she's telling a joke now because her eyebrows have gone up. Yeah. And so then you just watched for the eyebrows to go up. Even more.

Yeah. And then you were like, well, no, she's telling a joke now because her eyebrows have gone up. Number three on the list are the top six things I can say about Judith, nice things I can say

about Judith Collins. She prays like people from old movies pray. That's right. I love that. They put their hands together and they lean forward and they say,

dear Jesus. Because she needed everyone to know that she was praying. And they lead up to the election, she's like, see, I go to church. Everyone's like, you never come here. See, Christians? I know what's going on. She puts her hand together. She's like, what up, Jesus?

It's me, Judith. It's been a while. I'm going to need a fever. Number, and Jesus is like, no, I'm sorry. Plummeting poll numbers for you. Number two on the list of the top six nice things I can say about Judith Collins. I liked how she took the approach of setting the house on fire on the way out. The Russians called that a scorched earth policy.

The rest of us call it, if I can't have him, no one can. Set it on fire as we leave. And number one on the list of the top six nice things I can say about Judith Collins. Her husband is Samoan, so talofa. Talofa. That's not a compliment for Judith. Talofa to you. And a talofa to you.

And a talofa to everybody this morning. That is today's top six. ZDM's Fletch, Ronan Megan. There's a new term. It's not a dating term. A term that's come from the UK, hogo. Like, do you remember FOMO? I used to have so much FOMO.

Fear of missing out. Yeah, I think people still use FOMO, don't they, quite a bit? Yeah. I just don't have it anymore. The fear of missing out because you just rather stay at home yeah because of the pandemic

how good's home baby both yeah and just home where the heart is yeah it is sweet

you don't have to deal with people home always people are always saying how sweet home is you don't have to scan in and wear a mask yeah

I like to wear a mask at home well you you're not that kind. You, I think this sums you up, Vaughn. Sex mask, you're talking about, eh? That's what I meant.

Yeah, yeah. I think people picked up on that. Yeah, my sex mask is any face that's not this one. Sometimes I even wear that Winston Peters rubber mask. Yeah, I know.

Sade loves it. Sade loves it. Still better. She loves it, doesn't she? No, I think... You know who the problem is around here? And she'll be like, oh my God, talk like Winston. Sade loves it. Still better. She loves it, doesn't she? No, I think. You know, the problem is around here. And she'll be like, oh, my God, talk like Winston. I'll be like, immigrants.

Bloody immigrants. That's what I say. And she's like, oh, my dad's an immigrant. And I'm like, yep. And then sex happens. Yeah, right. No, this is you to a T, Vaughn. Hogo is the hassle of going out.

Oh, awful. Hassle of going out. Yeah. Horrible. Yeah, it really is. You've got to get there. You've got to get back. You've got to talk to people, presumably.

Yeah. No. You've got to get dressed up in something other than your swanee. Yeah. Well, no, not always. But Shona's like, you can't wear that. You've got a new swanee. Is this the new one?

This is the new swanee shirt. Now, at the moment, this is an unpaid plug. But if you like the look of this bone-coloured, Bendigo long-sleeve work shirt, that button's half down Stevie Irwin-esque. You're showing too much T-shirt. You can't show that much T-shirt. Yeah, you can only have a couple of centimeters of T-shirt.

I wore this without a T-shirt yesterday at home. Right. I felt so slutty. Am I allowed to say that about myself? No. But about myself. Okay. I felt, yeah, maybe.

I had that button and I put it on and I was like, shh, cheers to it. Anyway, that's... Why don't you just say sexy? Again, that's too much T-shirt. Because I didn't. I felt dirty. Oh, did you? I felt. Yeah, maybe. Because I had that button and I put it on and I was like, shh, cheers to it. Why don't you just say sexy? Again, that's too much to share. Because I didn't. I felt dirty. I felt dirty. But these, at the moment, $30.

Swandreau's having a Black Friday sale now. That's an unpaid endorsement. Yeah, right. These come in other colours. Horrible other colours. Are you going to buy? Horrible other colours. Bright red and bright blue.

Horrible other colours. That's such a my mum thing to do though. Be like, you like that top? Get it in every colour. Why don't you buy a whole lot seeing as you're wearing that to death? I'm going to.

This is my new one. Do it. Okay. Because what if they even stopped making them? I'll be livid. Like those long sleeved shirts that I like. You know that other places have long sleeved collared shirts.

Not like this, they don't. Oh yeah. It's a favourite shirt. It's a favourite shirts. Not like this, they don't. Oh, yeah. It's as comfortable as this. It's his favourite shirt. And this is, I could wear this going out now. Because it's got a collar. Right.

The hassle of going out. One less thing, because this is my nice version. Would you say that's your favourite shirt? Absolutely. Would you let me, would you loan me your favourite shirt? I would. Is this an inside joke? I ask you.

It's the latest. Curb your enthusiasm. It's the latest episode of Curb. You can't show too much t-shirt under a shirt. I would. Is this an inside joke? I would ask you to curve your enthusiasm. It's the latest episode of Curbs. You can't show too much T-shirt under a shirt. And you never, ever loan out shirts, but never your favorite shirt. Because what if you don't get it back? In the right state.

But, yeah, I'd let you wear the shirt. Thank you. I think you'd treat it with the respect it deserves. Could I wear the shirt? You could wear the shirt. We could all get the shirt. I was baiting him to say that I'd leave boobie marks. No, because it's loose fitting in the chest, you see. Right.

I thought this was my post-lockdown shirt. We need a boobie room. Yeah, a bit of boobie room. A bit of boobie room. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Right. What have I done? Pappas.

Yeah. You work at New World now. So I've got a problem that I need you to take to your headquarters. For those that have missed it, who was on their Instagram yesterday with the whole set of New World KitchenAid cookware? By the way, I'm sorry. They said, would you like the whole set?

I was like, oh, yeah, yes, please. Did you get a giveaway one? No. Tony Street got a giveaway one. I know. Yeah, Tony Street does the ads, though. You're not at Tony Street level. I'm working on it.

You're not at street level. She's at sea level. Yeah. She's a big old sea. You are. Don't say I am. Are you arguing with yourself? Sure am. Yeah, I guess. Leave her alone. No't say I am. Are you arguing with yourself? I sure am.

Yeah, I guess. Leave her alone. No, she's okay. You don't know what she's thinking. It's day 101. 101 Dalmatians. Oh, Jesus. Yeah, so can you tell New World?

Yeah, possible. They've got new self-serve checkouts. Oh, my one does too. Yeah. And I tell you what. It's good because would your old self-serve checkouts. Oh, my one does too. Yeah. And I tell you what. It's good because with your old self-serve checkout, never because we use the digital version of our FlyWise and we never scan it.

Yep, but now it does. Like that. Like that. So I said, I famously do this. I get all this armload of stuff to the self-serve and I beep, beep, beep. And then before I pay, I walk away and get a box. Right. And then come back. No, walk away and get a box. Right.

And then come back. No, you've got to be careful because the self-serve checkout once at Countdown was like. Timed out. It times out and goes to sleep or something. No. This one's just like, hello. No, it gets the supervisor to clear the checkout because you've spent too much time and it's sus about you.

I don't dilly dally when I get a box. Right. So I strode to get, or actually there was a bottle of wine as a purchase. Yeah. So supervisor needed to come and give it the old doot. I said, I'm just going to grab a box. How about you grab me those stickers? Jesus.

No, I didn't say it like that. I said, I'm just going to grab a box. Can I please get my stickers? Because you know you have to ask for the stickers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is because I'm collecting them for the cro to grab a box. Can I please get my stickers? Because you know you have to ask for the stickers. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is because I'm collecting them for the crockery. Yeah. Cookware.

Cookware. Oh, the KitchenAid cookware? The KitchenAid cookware. Megan could gift it to you. She could. Well, I can tell you it's lovely, but you're not going to have any of mine. Because that's what I also spent a long time the other day at the supermarket doing, picking it up and feeling its weight and being like, it's a good weight.

And I said to Shona, it's a good weight. She's heavy. She's heavy. So I said, could I please have my stickers on the way to get my box? More of a... She's there. It'd be good to do it there.

You look at how much it's going to cost and tell me how many stickers I'm going to get. I know for a fact one of the things I'm buying is a bonus sticker. Okay, yeah. So I'm going to get. I know for a fact one of the things I'm buying is a bonus sticker. Okay, yeah. So I'm going to get one more sticker than I would otherwise. Yeah.

So I, and she immediately fires back, not till you've paid. Like I was just like. Oh, I love her. Sacre bleu. Because they've got to cite the receipt because the receipt says exactly how many. It's not her job to tally up your.

So that's where I. Order. I didn't know that, but I know it now because then she came. the receipt says exactly how many. It's not her job to tally up your order. I didn't know that, but I know it now because then she came, I took her the receipt, I said, oh, I've paid now. Yeah. And she said, you have. And then she did a scribble on the receipt. I think that's so that you don't pick it out of the, or you can't go back later and be like, you didn't give me my stickers because I signed them

after they gave me the stickers. So if you could just run that up the old flagpole. Wait, what do you want me to run up? What's the... Well, Vaughn would like his stickers before he pays. I think that's his problem. When you click your fingers at them, they are being very vigilant with the stickers.

Oh, yeah, they don't... They have to be. They were like that with the knives too. Yeah. Yeah, they were signing the receipts and everything. I went through the old school checkout, which I believe is just the knives too. Yeah. Yeah, they were signing the receipts and everything. I went through the old school checkout, which I believe is just called the checkout.

Yep. And I was flirting up a storm with one of the older ladies there because that's my demographic. Yep. You want to try and get some extra stickers. Yeah, and then sticker time, I was like, ooh, sticker time. I actually said it like that. She was like, oh, I'll get you your stickers. I said, ooh, sticker time. Like actually said it like that. She was like, ooh, I'll get you your stickers. I said, ooh, sticker time.

Like that. Expecting. That sort of like. That would do it. With her arms, she'd just reel them off and just give you. Like that at the same time. She did it. She like gave me, she was like, one, two, three.

Tear. Very carefully. And she's like, there's your stickers. I was like. And please do up that extra button on your swan rusher. I want to see your testicles. Yeah. Also, while we're talking about your Instagram post,

I've put an Instagram post up and I haven't put an ad on it. Now, I don't want anyone to take me to the cleaners on that. Also, I don't know why my Instagram, I'm not getting any penetration on my Instagram. I'm not getting any cut through on my Instagram. Am I creating shit content? That's what it is. That's what it is. I put my heart and soul

into this post with these stupid dogs. They say I never work with children and animals. Are your kids in the post? No. That's where you went wrong. People don't follow you for you. You said I put too much writing in the post. It knows when your video's got too much writing. Here's why I put writing in.

And I'm not a hero. Yeah. But yes, I am. Okay. Because one time I put captions on because the girls were speaking quietly and they were mumbling. And afterwards I said, for Christ's sake, children, enunciate. Enunciate.

But it was too late. Yeah, right. So I put little captions In one of the videos With the girls And now Someone messaged me saying I'm hearing impaired

So when I watch Instagram videos I have to lip read And it can be hard And it was really nice Having the titles there So I was like Every time I do a little video now

I'm always like I'll put subtitles on there Yeah Even if it only makes a difference To one or two people Again I'm not a hero You're not a hero I'm not a hero I'll accept subtitles on there. Yeah. Even if it only makes a difference to one or two people. Again, I'm not a hero. You're not a hero. I'm not a hero.

I'll accept my MBE, my New Year's Honours, Queen's Birthday, whatever. Jesus Christ. I'm not a hero. But now I'm being punished for being inclusive. I mean, if you get... Because that's only a New Zealand rule. And that was an honest mistake. Carwin's trying to fix it for me.

I won't be surprised if you get battered to death with a KitchenAid casserole dish. Who by? Multiple people. Jesus. Okay, well, I'm going to keep an eye out for it. ZM's Flesh Warner Megan. Clay. ZM.

Your Friday flashback today. Yeah. That didn't sound... What are you going to do? Well, I haven't picked yet. You came out strong last week and said you had a choice, but now you're doubting yourself. Well, I was going to go an unknown indie track,

which is 10 years old. And I'm like, well, no one's going to know it, and I'm going to get heaps of shit for it. Someone might know it. Well, back to the drawing board. Coming up on the show before 8 o'clock this morning, we are going to catch up with TV One Breakfast

reporter Maddy McLean who this morning is in Gisborne and talking to those that are running Rhythm and Vines and what's happening there. And what's happening because that is a big question at the moment is R&V, are a lot of the summer festivals going ahead?

Particularly R&V, the nation's biggest. It's been a catch up with him, who's on the ground. I believe the idea is to kind of boost vaccination numbers so that it can go ahead. But a lot of questions regarding that. What'd I miss? When you went to the toilet,

I said you only have a minute. Uh-huh. Well, at that stage, it was only a wheeze. Oh. Here's the... What is wrong with you? Because I'm absolutely

gassing my system with vitamins at the moment. Why? Because I'm sick. Oh, yeah, right. I'm trying to like, you know, whatever.

And... But... So you've got your light atmospheric vitamin C. Yeah. There's some green juice stuff. Yeah. That doesn't alkalize you. That's bullshit.

But it's got lots of greens in it. So that's gotta be good for you. Your crystals are charged. Crystals up and inside. Good. My nostrils. I got my normal Barocca. I got this Viralek stuff.

I'm just trying to smash this cold because everybody thinks I've got COVID, but it's not COVID. I've had the test. But it does upset the tum. Okay. It does create havoc on one's tum. That's good to know. That was my excuse. I apologise to everybody.

I mean, I don't really know that they noticed you were here. No, they don't. I mean, we seamlessly could have got away with that. Yeah. CDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Octalina Anderson. Ah. Octalina Anderson.

Congratulations. And also commiserations. She was the first ever female prime minister of Sweden. And just hours after she was appointed, she's like, nope. I wish to resign. Which, when you actually look into it, it wasn't

the fact that she was like, oh, I can't handle this. No, I didn't want this. It was that there was a moral conundrum. Yeah, there's a system. It's like New Zealand with the MMP system. There were different parties, and one of the parties was quite right wing. Nazis! Yeah, rooted in Nazi ideology and stuff.

So she's like, well, I can't work in this. I can't work with them. But literally had the job as prime minister in Sweden for a day. Yeah. This is good stuff. Because now she's on the books as the whatever prime minister and the first female prime minister, but she didn't have to go through all of this bullshit.

Everybody else that's prime minister has to go through. Do you think she gets all the perks that come with being a former prime minister, like free travel? Lifetime travel, lifetime security detail. That's a great loophole. I was prime minister. I think you have to, normally you've got to serve X amount of years, don't you? How many?

How many? It's more than a day. I'm pretty sure it's more than a day. Yeah, minimum. So we want to reckon, if you're a politician in New Zealand, at the end of your tenureship, if people can be, like, even in your constituency, walk up to 100 people

and if 85 of them can't name you just by looking at a photo, you shouldn't get all the perks because you haven't. But there's some MPs that, like, they've been the MP of some back-block small electorate for 80 years. And this guy's been dead for the last 20. And no one's even noticed. Yeah. But there's too many members of parliament just skating through, right?

But they're still doing public service just because you don't see them on the telly every day. They do. Yeah, some of them. but then they'll be the ones that their constituents can name if they represented their area well. Yeah. Or they were just super annoying on the news every night. Yeah, well, that's the other thing. But then they've probably

dealt with their fissure of hate over the time, so they get the perks. So, like the Prime Minister of Sweden who lasted a day in the job, we want to ask now, how quickly did you quit a job? Day one always sucks though. Day one does suck, but maybe you get there and you're like, okay, this

is not what I thought this job would be. Like, I have to actually do hard work. I'm actually not qualified to do this. I don't know how they picked me to do this job. Yeah. Who, is there anybody listening now that's quit super quick? I had, this is kind of like

that. At school, I was often selected to be the person to show around the new kids. Okay. I don't know why. I think it's because I sat perfectly in the middle of all the groups. Right. The cool kids and the nerds. Yeah. Like we were all there and I was just bang in the middle.

And they showed me around and one day this kid came and I was just bang in the middle. And they showed me around. And one day this kid came, and I was like, oh, yeah, this is everything, and this is the library, and did the old classic show round. And then the next day the kid wasn't there, and I said to the deputy principal, where'd that kid go? And they said they decided not to come to the school. And that was the last student you showed around. Was it on my tour?

I did it very personally. I really ramped up my tours after that. I think it was more on Morrisville than it was you, to be honest. Maybe, yeah. Perhaps. 0800 DALS at M. Give us a call right now. You can text as well, 9696.

How quickly did you quit a job? Or maybe you had someone come to work at your workplace, and they lasted a day because they set something on fire or flooded something. I don't know. We're talking about how quickly you've been like, not for me, after you started a job. Hey, look, life's short.

Not for me. Yeah, the new prime minister of Sweden has resigned after a day. Yeah. So can you beat a day? Are we getting down to the hours? You bet. Not good.

I got a job. They said have a trial day. It lasted 30 minutes. So let's have a trial half an hour hour Are you allowed to do a trial day? Um I'd still last for my half an hour's wages Yeah Um, I worked at a deli

At a very large supermarket A yellow one with a stick man Oh, what was that? Don't tell them A yellow supermarket. Okay. Yeah. I'm going to need a minute. Okay, carry on. Okay, you try to work it out by the end of this.

I worked there and a lady got a job there. Right. An empty nester, middle aged woman. Yeah. And I had to train her. Okay. She was appalled that the job entailed more than just handing out ham. What did she think was going to happen?

She probably was just like, you know what I can do? Someone can say 200 grams of ham. No, I can eyeball 200 grams of ham, give or take 10 grams. That's my talent. I can eyeball 200 grams of ham. And then they're like, okay, but you need it clean, there needs to be scrubbing. Also, the coleslaw needs to be made. Yeah, yeah. She quit just after

lunch when she came back and we were like, alright, well now it's time to make the coleslaw and she's like, bullshit, it is. She was out. It was Golf Warehouse, wasn't it? Bingo, you got it. That's exactly where they were dishing out deli meats. Big and yellow. Famously. Somebody else said, I did a two hour trial at a fast Bingo. You got it. That's exactly where they were dishing out deli meats. Big and yellow. Famously. Famously for its...

Somebody else said, I did a two-hour trial at a fast food place. I was like, oh, it's not really for me. And they said, nah, we kind of judged that. Here, we'll pay you in a combo meal because we can't be bothered filling out the paperwork with holding tax and all that jazz just to pay for a couple of hours.

So how about a combo? To which I said, it's fantastic. Zoe, how long did you last in a job? I lasted a day. Oh, what job was that? So I got hired a couple of years to work as a receptionist in a gym. And my first day, they were showing me around and they were saying, oh, yeah, this is all the equipment,

you need to learn what all of it is and you need to use it. And I was like, ah, yeah, no, I quit. Thank you. Why did you have to, you were just doing reception, right? You were just scanning people in and doing memberships. Why do you need to know how to use the squat machine?

They wanted me to help out with the customers around there. It seems like that's a job for like a personal trainer or someone that studied fitness. I needed to be able to clean the machines properly as well apparently. Oh God. Fletch doesn't do that. That's because of people

like Fletch. When we all get back into gyms, you've got to start wiping up. I wiped down the machines for like a week. Yeah, you get a half a wipe. I did it for a week and everybody stopped wiping them down because we thought the pandemic had gone away. It's gross that you're not giving a

thorough spray and wipe. Rachel, how long did you last in a job? I lasted four hours. Four hours? Doing what? Asparagus picking. Oh, that's tough. That's tough.

Backbreaking. Individual spear by spear. You have to cut those, right? Yeah, but you're like crouched down and it was just, oh my God, I didn't know what I was getting into. My brother said it was a really good thing and we get paid heat. And after four hours, it was probably about three and a half hours, we were allowed to have a break.

So I walked down the road to a phone box, rang my mum and asked her to come get me. I was like, nah. Why did they pay you for the three and a half hours? Well, I actually found out that they did pay me, but I never received it because they gave the check, because it was like checks in those days, to my brother. And he decided that I didn't deserve it

because I hadn't even mastered the day, and so he kept it. You abandoned ship. No, he's fair enough. He'd be charged with treason, I reckon. He's got a great point. Rachel, thanks for your call. Anise, how long did you last in a job?

I lasted, it was one shift, so it was about three or four hours. Oh, doing what? It was cold calling for an insurance company, and it was one shift, so it was about three or four hours. Oh, doing what? It was cold calling for an insurance company and it was horrible. Yeah, because I had one of those calls the other day and I was just like, oh, no, sorry, I'm not interested. And I, yeah, it's just like. Yeah, well, for my whole shift, I only had sort of one call that seemed like it was going to be successful. But I think he was just stringing me along to keep me from calling other people.

So, yeah. So he was like taking the grenade. Like he threw himself on the grenade and said, I'll tie this person up. Or he's just lonely. Yeah, 100% think he was doing that. And when he started sort of, like when I started feeling like that was what was happening, I thought, okay, maybe someone else should give you a call back when it's a better time.

And he just, he was like, no, no, no, let's sort this out now. And so I kind of went to switch to the next spiel that I had to say. And then I lost the paperwork and I got flustered and I wound up sort of saying something under my breath that I sort of probably shouldn't have said. And then he heard me. So he said, did you just say such and such? And I was like, no, no, no. I said

shoot. But yeah, I totally did. Yeah, so that job wasn't for you, Anise. Thanks for your call. Message us in. Of when you chucked it in pretty smartly. Someone said, I work at a lawyer's. We had a new admin girl. She lasted three days

till she quit. But those three days she did spend crying at her desk. Oh. Oh, my God. Is she okay? She's like, oh, my God, I thought it was going to be like suits. This is boring. It's so boring and no one's as hot as they are on TV at law firms. This isn't as much fun as Ally McBeal.

No. I worked at a supermarket in the UK. I got another job at another supermarket for a night role. I left halfway through the night

without saying anything. Never saw or spoke to them again. It was just horrible. I think ghosting a job if you had it would be great. Once you've,

on payday though, do it on payday. So the pay comes in and then you're a, and then you just ghost your job. You ghost. Was relieving in a school.

In fact, we've had two messages. I thought this was the same message. This might be the same story from both sides. I showed a relief teacher to their classroom. They walked in. I walked them in at 8.49. I said, this is the class you'll be in for the day.

At morning tea, she was like, she walked into the staff room and she's like, I won't be going back there, ta-ta, and walked out. And this other person said, I was relieving in a school. I walked out by 10 a.m. as the kids in the class were just absolutely feral. Yeah. Yeah.

But it was always, you always tried to break the relief teacher, eh? Yeah. You tried. It was horrible, but why? Why did we do that? But you did. You did. I think it was horrible but why why did we do that but you did you did i don't

know i think it's because the ordinary teachers would your ordinary teacher tell you that relief teachers were paid more mate i think teachers love being like these relief teachers get paid more than us you better well let's make them work for it horrible cdm's fledgeborn and megan take the kids up from school yesterday yesterday and then went to the supermarket. We mentioned that before. Yeah. With the new self-serve machine. Self-serve?

Self-checkout thing? Anyway, while I was there, because I am a great man, I grabbed each one of my daughters a Malteser reindeer. Oh, cute. I'm really bad at that because my mum would never do it. So in my mind when I get to the checkout, I'm like, what would little Vaughn want? Little Vaughn would want to, he'd be right into something sweet

and he'd be right into some sort of like festive themed thing. I think our parents would always buy us a treat because they knew it would keep us quiet at the end of the weekly food shop. Right. So the deal was if you behaved, you got a treat at the end of it, but if you misbehaved, no treat. Yeah. Or they stay in the car.

Okay. Right. With the windows up. Yep. Good. And cigarettes. And water. Or not water.

They could spill that and make a mess in the car and leave them with cigarettes. So they're enjoying their cigarettes. Menthol cigarettes because they're children. Yeah. I get back to the car and I toss them and they're just like stoked. That's the other thing. They're always stoked to get chocolate. Whoa, yes.

Thanks, Dad. Maybe I've got a problem. I need that sort of feedback in my day-to-day parenting. Yeah. Anyway, I can be a bad guy as well. I can be a good cop and bad cop. Okay. So I'm being good cop.

We're driving along and they say, Dad, question. Name your top five favourite things with chocolate in them. And I'm just like, whoa, far too big a question. I thought this was going to be a where do babies come from question. No, we've dealt with that. That was relatively easy. Just tell the truth.

And they're just like, what? What? How? And you're like, truth. And they're just like, what? What? How? And you're like, well, yep. And they explain, they're like,

geez, whoa. Ask your mother. No, just be honest with you. You'd be surprised what children can like process in that regards to things.

So they said, what's your top five things with chocolate in them? And I just couldn't. It was too much. And then they just rattled off It was too much. And then they just rattled off their top five things. Maltesers made their list. Yeah, that would be

one of my top five because, you know, I can hoover a bag of those. Yeah, how good. And I said, oh, you should have tried white Maltesers, white chocolate Maltesers. And they were like, what? Yeah, they used to come in white chocolate. Back in the day. And then they were like, okay, yeah, that white chocolate is one of my top five chocolates as well. So things with chocolate in them,

not just a block of chocolate. Anything that has chocolate. No, anything that has chocolate. So they went Maltesers, chocolate, ice cream, but not plain chocolate ice cream, chocolate ice cream with the chocolate chunks and the chocolate syrup-y swirl in it.

And so they, oh, August was Freddo Frogs. Yeah. And so they, oh, August was Freddo Frogs. Yeah. And Indy's other chocolate thing was, what was their other chocolate thing? Oh, it's hard, isn't it? See, they just rattled them off. I was like, you just, whoa, whoa.

If you're deciding a top five, you've got to give it some thought. You've got to, yeah. You've really got to ponder this for a few days. I just couldn't do it. The red licorice with the chocolate insert. Yeah.

Okay, well, it's got chocolate, so it's in my top five. It would absolutely pass the bar. That's so... See? What a ponderous question. Cream eggs? Nah.

Old cream eggs? Old cream eggs. Yeah, before they went all... New cream eggs? Yeah. No. No. And maybe it's when you're a child, you've got so much...

Linded balls. Linded balls. Linded borscht. What about like... Nah. Nah, not a top five. Naughty. Too naughty. Yeah, you're right. You're a child, you've got so much. Linded balls. Linded balls. What about like, naatty to naatty? Yeah, you're right. You're a scorched almonds. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, scorched or a skinny almond. Or the skinny almonds, yeah. That's the debate too. I was like, oh, pretty skinny almond. And they were like, oh. And I was like, yeah, but you're right. Is it just because they're new and exciting? A scorched almond's going to stand the test of time?

You can eat heaps more of them and then different flavours and colours. Yeah. But then what about like baking? Because you like caramel slice with chocolate on top. Chocolate muffin. Yeah. Okay, I'm going to need a... Pan of chocolat.

See, this is what I said. I'm going to need a week at least to get back to you. I know, I know. This is a brainstorm session. You're going to sit down, you're going to do a mind map. Yeah. And then even...

Just chocolate. Even then, depending on your mood, the list can change. I guess that's why you do a top five, right? And that's another important thing to take into consideration with your top five is your different moods for chocolate. It was a very ponderous question.

Even just when I put them to bed, I'm still just, my mind is just racing. My mind is racing on this top five chocolate things you guys have put to me. Well, play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Megan. Joining us on the ground in Gisborne. Last time I was in Gisborne with them, we were in arseless chaps covered in environmentally friendly glitter.

We're in cowboy hats, nipple tassels, and we were chewing our faces off. Matty McLean! Good morning. I guess I've got my serious news blazer on so I've asked for a serious news thing to go underneath it. You got it.

Vaughan, don't flirt with me right now because I'm very serious, okay? But you've got to admit that R&B with Vaughan was one of your favourite New Years, Matty. Any New Years with Vaughan is my favourite New Year. Now, so we yesterday, we had a little work picnic in the park and a few drinks, and everybody, the topic of conversation was,

is Rhythm and Vines happening this year? Now, you're on the ground in Gisborne for TV One this morning. What's the vibe on the ground? What are you feeling? Yeah, look, I'm going to get my serious news statistics out. I'm looking at them right now. 74% of people here have had two doses of the vaccine. You compare that with Auckland, they're up around 90.

So they've still got a really, really long way to go. And there's so much kind of hesitancy from people here to get it done. So they are literally on the ground going door to door, just trying to get as many people vaccinated as possible. If they can do that pretty quickly, like if they can get out in about the next couple of weeks and get people through the door to get that first jab, then maybe they'll be

ready in time for New Year's, but far out. It's December next week, isn't it? Hey, Serious News guy Matty, do you have the stats for how many people at least had one jab? I do, Megan. Thank you for asking. 85% first dose.

They need 1,950 people to get in to reach 90% first dose. Okay. It's a bit of a love or hate, though, for Gisborne locals with R&B, right? Because town gets overrun for a few days, but it also brings in so much money. Yeah, for local businesses. And then you've also got to think about all the artists

and the people that put on R&V. It's good for them to have the jobs, but then also some people just want them to piss off, don't they? Maybe great if you own a business, but if you're a checkout chick in the local pack and save,

do you really want that many people coming through? No, you don't. No, it's a lot of work, isn't it? Right. Serious news guy, Matty, I've got a question. Are you wearing your serious news blazer on top, but what are you wearing on the bottom of it?

Do you two want us to leave you alone? I told you, Vaughan, don't flirt with me. I'm very serious right now. I'm sorry, I can't help myself. So is R&B happening then, Matty? What do you reckon? Well, I actually chatted to Hamish Pinkham, the boss of R&B, last week, and he was very confident that it would still go ahead.

So I reckon they can do it in terms of getting the rates up. Whether or not people want it to happen here is another story. But I'm an eternally optimistic, serious news guy. Yeah, aren't we all? If I can be serious for a minute. Okay. Rhythm and Vines or not, people are going to be coming to Gisborne. Yes.

And if the people aren't vaccinated, there's going to be, you know, potentially a lot of dangerous situation that could be avoided. Exactly. So you know what the,

you know what the, what you need to do to fix that? Bloody get in and get your jab. Yeah, nice. Okay. God, I'm very serious

this morning. Very serious. You are, you are. What if we did an arseless chaps vaccination drive-thru where people came down. That'll do it. Exactly. And they got their jab

and then a parade of men. I'll fly down. I'll join you because you and I, we've arseless chaps together before. And platonically, of course, nowadays because we're both partnered up. But, you know, and then there's some sort of reward

for people as well. Well, that's reward enough for me. And then the people who aren't vaccinated, we show up at their house in the arseless chaps and we don't leave until they're vaccinated. So it is both reward and punishment. Exactly. Exactly.

Manny McLean, serious news guy this morning. Reward and punishment. Exactly. Love it. Matty McLean, serious news guy this morning. Forrest and Gisborne, head of Rhythm and Vines. Thank you so much for talking to us this morning, Matty. Might see you at the beach later. Yes, please. For a wine call. I'd love a very serious wine call-up.

Very serious wine call-up. Ellie. Love you guys. Ellie. Thank you. Very serious when I go up. Ellie. Love you guys. Ellie. ZM's Flashborn and Megan. Play ZM. Friday Flashback.

Okay, I am jazzed for this. Now, this is probably the oldest ever Flashback Friday we've ever played. And you're normally the one that pulls these. Love and oldie. Love an oldie, but a goodie. I feel like everybody knows this song. Everybody knows this song. Now, I have, this is an ode to a fallen member of Parliament, Judith Ann Collins,

the New Zealand politician who served as the leader of the opposition and leader of the National Party from the 14th of July to the 25th of November, just yesterday. R.I.P. This song went to number one in every country in the world except France.

And I'm yet to find out what beat this song when the entire world was listening to this song. It was number one in New Zealand as well, without a doubt. It was the biggest song of the year in most countries by the end of the year. I think we've figured it out, right? If not. Oh, everyone loves a na-na-na-na-na.

Yeah, it's a na-na-na-na. ZM, it's your Friday flashback. Make it better. Remember to let her into your heart. Then you can start to make it better. Hey Jude, don't be afraid. You were made to go out and get her. The minute you let her under your skin,

then you begin to make it better And anytime you feel the pain Hey Jude, refrain Don't carry the world Up on your shoulder Well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool By making this world a little colder La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la Hey, June, don't let me down You have found her, now go and get her

Remember to let her into your heart Then you can start to make it better Thank you. want to perform with And don't you know that it's just you Hey Jude, you do The movement you need is on your shoulder Na na na na na Na na na, na, na, na, na, na, na, na, yeah.

Hey, Jude, don't make it bad. Take a side song and make it better. Remember to let her under your skin And you'll be in to make it better Better, better, better, better Better, better, yeah, yeah, na, na, na. Na, na, na, na. Hey Jude.

Hey Jude, hey Jude, hey Jude, hey Jude. It's your Friday flashback on ZM, The Beatles and Hey Jude. It's the version where they lose their minds. It's Collins, yeah. Hey Jude, they go Jude, hey Jude, hey Jude, the Beatles And Hey Jude It's the version with the other bit where they lose their minds At Collins, yeah Hey Jude, they go Jude, Jude, Jude That was the edit The other one was like seven minutes long And we don't have time for that today

R.A.P. Judith Collins Not dead, politically dead, yes No, no, no, still the MP for Fantastic To loafer Megan Feedback, somebody said the MP for Papagura. Fantastic. Telofa. Megan. Wait, what was the feedback?

Feedback. Somebody said, they said my name, but they meant you. The National Party board has met and unanimously agree you should be demoted and henceforth not allowed to pick Friday Flashback. Somebody else said. Classic Judith Collins saying the board's met. You're tuned into the sweet sounds of Radio Reba. Radio Reba wouldn't play The Beatles. They lived a hedonistic lifestyle.

A hedonistic lifestyle. Somebody said, am I the only one who's never heard the full song, but I know that hey, hey, nah, nah, nah, nah, Jude. Someone said, what song is this? Oh, my God. Ouch. na na na na Jude but so I said what song is this oh my god oh my god ouch oh my god

well it was either that or I was gonna go Casher but that Beatles documentary that comes out soon Peter Jackson's done that hasn't he

yeah Peter Jackson's done that comes out on Disney Plus it looks amazing okay it looks so good three parts it's about how they basically

did the most New Zealand thing of all time and said yeah we've got an album when's it due out three weeks alright guys we've got an album. When's it due out? Three weeks. Alright guys, we've got to start working on that album. That was me with my homework the night before. They locked themselves up and did it.

Moving on to something a little bit depressing. How to know if your partner's planning on breaking up with you. Oh, great. I mean, yeah, there's two words that they may chuck into conversation a little bit more than usual, but they are common words. So if they're just saying them, I don't know, don't look into this too much. But if they're starting to use pronouns such as I or we more, you might be heading for a breakup.

I or we. I or we. Wouldn't it be I? Like, I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this. Not we're going to do this. Like you say, this New Year's, I'm going to this. And then you're like, okay, this is a sign he's breaking up with me. So using the

words I and we more showed signs of increased cognitive processing, especially I, it's correlated with depression and sadness. So you're not thinking so much about others, especially the one you're in a relationship with. Wouldn't you be saying like, we are doing this, we're doing that? You would think so.

Yeah. So they studied a whole bunch of people before the breakup and then a year after. It took about a year for people's language to return to normal. But it did affect their language. The way they spoke changed when they were planning or when they were unhappy and planning to break up with someone. That's true, though, because I had to break up with somebody

because they said they'd seen that. And I said, that language needs to change or I'm going to be out of it. Have you ever been broken up with and had like a spidey, tingly feeling it was coming? Yes, I have. How? Both times. Every time. When you got dumped

on Christmas Day? To be honest, I didn't see that coming. That was like, I was playing on the train tracks, but just around the corner. Right, okay. So I didn't see it coming until it was right on me, but then I saw it was coming. But no, this other time, I went round to her house and she was

like, oh, Kerry's calling. Kerry's calling. I was like, okay. Kerry's her friend? Actual name. Yeah. And then she's like, I'll just take this call. I was like, yeah, yeah, cool.

And so I just sat in the lounge and then she went into the kitchen and that was just one wall apart. Yeah. With no door. Okay. And she said to Kerry, I haven't done it yet. I know, I know, I'm going to do it. Tonight's the night, yo. I'm going to do it.

I know it's just hard. Do you mean break up with you? Yeah. And so I was like, oh, I see what's happening here. But then once she got off the phone to Kerry. She came back into the room and I went, I'm breaking up with you. Be true. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Now I, now I, well, that's, you're a loser because you got broken up with. But this guy, he's cool. He's cool. He's all right. He's going home now. No, I was just sat there and I was like, what was, how's that? How's Carrie? And she's like, I was like, yeah, I kind of heard all that.

She was like, oh, okay. So, um, and then. I'm starting to think that she went into the kitchen and was loud on purpose. Yeah. I think she might have messaged Kerry and said, call. Can you help me out with this?

I've got to get this fire started. Call. Can we take some calls now? How did you know that you were about to be dumped? Did you see it coming? Did you smell the smoke? Maybe you just had a little intuition. Yeah.

It's quite sad. Huh? It's quite sad. It is quite sad, isn't it? Especially if you're like, oh, it's going to start happening soon. But prior to that, you had no inclination. Yeah. And then it's just like, boom, it's here.

All right. Well, I mean, we'll see if anyone's been in this situation. 0800-DARLS-IT-M, 9696. You can text in. How did you know you were about to be dumped? Did the barometer drop? Yeah. Maybe you overheard a call like Vaughn.

Study has revealed if your partner's starting to use I and we more in a conversation, their pronouns, especially I, is they're not talking about you in their life as much. It means you might be heading for a breakup. So we wanted to know if you ever saw a breakup coming. How did you know you were about to be dumped? You heard a phone call before you were dumped? Yep.

I mean, we're going back some years, though. You were over it. You're not. Pain's not even there anymore. Some calls, lots of messages. Anonymous, how did you know you were about to be broken up with? I didn't get an I love you text before I went to bed. And that was despite having that happen for probably the past, I don't know, 18 months of our relationship.

And then, yeah. Oh, no. Did you text them? Yes, yeah. So there was a little bit of back and forth. I was like, love you, night. And then I just didn't get anything back. And I was like, oh, like, this is so weird. Like, what's happening? And then I was like, hey you, night. And then I just didn't get anything back. And I was like, oh, like, this is so weird.

Like, what's happening? And then I was like, hey, like, is everything okay? Oh, my God. And then they were like, yeah, it's fine, night. And I was like, night, like, what's happening? Uh-oh. But was there anything, was there any inkling before that? No.

And the context is that he cheated on me with someone that evening. And so I think I was feeling a bit guilty. I'll kill him. Yeah. Wow. Not great, but that was a long time ago. We're much better now, but yeah, it was

not good. So like Vaughn, you're not at all holding on to that. No. No one needs to die today. Anonymous, thanks for your call. Hannah, when did you know you were about to be dumped? Oh, so he said,

let's go have a talk at the park. And I was like, oh no, you're just going to talk about, you know, your relationship. It's at the park. You're going to have fun. It's going to be romantic. That kind of thing. And I was like, oh, no, you're just going to talk about, you know, your relationship. It's at the park. You're going to have fun. It's going to be romantic, that kind of thing.

And I was like, nah, nah, he's going to break up with me. Yeah, it's a classic do it in public so that you can't make a scene. I always say to my partner we need to talk just to keep him on his toes. Oh, really? But one day it's going to backfire on me. Yeah, he's going to be like, oh, thank God, finally. I'm pretty sure you're... Set me free, set me free. I'm pretty sure your psycho's come out every day on the show this week.

I know, it has. Some messages in. Someone said he started referring to me as bro, and that's when I knew we were headed for the cliff. Or it's like mate, dude, bro. I only ever call Sade mate. I hate that. She'll know something's wrong if one day I'm like, hello, love.

She'll be like, what's happening? Yeah. What is wrong with you? I knew I was being dumped when he didn't turn up for my 21st. He rocked up during the party in a van with his mates. Look, if he's in a van with mates, you should probably break up with him anyway. Yeah. Nothing good happens in a vanload of lads. Nothing

good. And he passed me a photo book out the car window and then said, have a good one and drove off. At least wait till after. At least you got your stuff back. I knew I was being broken up with because he arrived

at the event of our breakup with a bag of my clothes from his house. He then avoided me for the rest of the night. And then once everyone left the party, he broke the news to me. Oh, right. Okay. Broke the news to me.

Georgie, how did you know you were being broken up with? Good, guys. How you going? Good. Good, guys. How you going? Good, thanks. So he asked for a break like a month before he actually did it, and that was kind of the start. Yeah.

The whole, you know, change of password thing. But when he was next to me, he would be on his phone, and I'd catch him, you know, chatting about the girls on Snapchat, that sort of thing. And then once I saw her, I was looking to a girl about her underwear. That's kind of when I started to really know her. Are you sure, though? Because Vaughn and I were always...

Like, sometimes on the way to work, I'm like, what knickers are you wearing today? Oh, we can't wear the same knickers. No, no, we can't. Can't have a knickers snap. No. I feel like that could be a type of conversation you could have with your mate,

but maybe not with another girl while you've got your girlfriend next year. Georgie, Georgie, Georgie, hon. Georgie, hon. There was more red flags in the lead up to this than at the beach when the lifesavers are like, we'll do the whole beach. It just gets worse. Then we had our one-year anniversary.

I shouldn't have made it that far, to be honest. Wait, wait, wait. Georgie, stop. After the undies picture, you had your first anniversary. I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Georgie, I will again refer to you as hon. Hon. We had our one-year anniversary, and he was on his phone the whole time.

Hon. Two days later, two days later. Two breaks up with me then and then tells me, yeah, I returned your birthday present. It was a ring, but I didn't want to give it to you because it was expensive and I was going to break up with you. He's a dick. You should have been breaking up with him, Han. It was a bit ruthless. It's okay breaking up with him, Han. Han.

It's okay. They all come crawling back later on. You were literally dating a red flag. You are the opposite of me. I am psycho and tuned to every little detail. You're not. Yeah, Andrew has to, Megan has to unlock Andrew's phone for him to use it.

Andrew's not even allowed, Andrew's not even allowed to look at the farmer's catalogue until Megan's gone through and taken out the undies papers. Yeah, I'll look it up the next time. Well, he can't be getting excited at the Bindon models, can he? Absolutely not. Oh, my gosh. We joke. Do we?

Do we? Do we? He's not allowed to watch Home and Away No He's not allowed to watch the intro Absolutely not Thanks Georgie Next on the show Fact of the day

He's not allowed to watch the weather When Renee's doing it Because it's the sexy weather Megan's like Who's on the weather tonight? Who's on the weather tonight? And Andrew's like It's Dan

And she's like, who's on the weather tonight? And Andrew's like, it's Dan. And she's like, permission to watch. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day incorporates some of our favourite things. Okay. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- a tradition as old as whiskey distilling itself. Oh, is it to stop rats getting in? Correct. Oh, get on you, sister. Correct. So throughout history, brewers have always kept cats.

Brewers and distillers have always kept cats because of the amount of grain on hand. Oh, yeah, they'd smell that a mile away. So the rats and birds are a big problem. So the idea was if you had a distillery, you had a cat or multiple cats. Probably back now that storage can be a little bit more rat-proof and bird-proof, you probably just have a cat to keep them at bay. But back in the day, you'd have multiple cats to catch

the birds and rats before they sullied your grain that you would make your whiskey out of. Distillery cats, there's a book called Distilleryillery Cats Profiles in Courage of World's Most Spirited Mouses Spirited And it meets some brewery cats From around the Around the traps They also give out every year The top five distillery cats

Oh okay As awards amongst the different distilleries Right They've got a few here This cat's called Rick Key. So it sounds a little bit like whiskey. Okay. Rick Key.

Rick Key was an adopted cat, and he is at the Castle and Key Distillery. Here's Rick. He's an adopted cat, a rescue cat. Had a bit of a tough start to life. He got half an ear and an eye at the situation there. He's pretty cute. And he's also FIV positive. Female, feline.

HIV, yeah. F. HIV. Yeah. Feline HIV. Yeah. Which cats can pass to other cats through fighting and all manner of things, isn't it? Especially very prolific amongst the urban cats. He's a cat ambassador for whiskey. Here's another one. Sugar Maple.

Look at Sugar Maple up there. I'll show you my favourite. That's a pretty cute cat. My favourite is Fatty. Here's Fatty. That's not as fat as my cat. Fatty at the Hotel Tango Distillery. By the way, my cat, who, you know, is on a diet at the moment because he was 6.8 kgs. Yeah.

I'm feeding him like 20% to 30% less, like the vet said, and all he does is meow and claw at me. Fatty, the cat, how big? How fat? 35 pounds, 15.8 kilograms. Oh, that's nothing compared to my fat cat. Your cat's six. Yeah, but my cat hasn't fully grown yet.

It's still got six months to go until it's adult size. But your cat's not going to put on eight kgs in six months. Give it a few years, Vaughn. It's not me at the start of lockdown. But yeah, so Fatty is at Fort Tango Distillery. So yeah, this is apparently a thing. It's almost,

it's just a tradition. Even if you don't need them, you have a distillery cat. It brings good luck to the distilling process. Okay. So today's fact of the day is there are such things

as distillery cats. fact of the day is there are such things as distillery cats. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. ZM from iHeartRadio. This is the latest. Billie Eilish has taken to Instagram. I'm being distracted by your Siri. You came in really hard with the bully. Sorry.

Which Billie? Your Siri was talking at me. Billie Eilish. I thought you meant Billie Piper. No. Or Billie Jean. She's not my lover. Or former national leader Billie Englishilish. I thought you meant Billie Piper. No. Or Billie Jean. She's not my lover. Or former national leader Billie English.

Yes. He loves spaghetti and pineapple on a pizza. Or Billie Ray Cyrus. Yeah. Or Billy M. Shatner. Sure. Prince Billiam. Buffalo Bill.

Buffalo Billiam. Buffalo Billy. Buffalo Billy. Yum. Buffalo Billy. Billie Eilish. Billie the Kid. Billie the Kid-um. Bublo Billy. Billy Eilish. Billy the Kid. Billy the Kid.

Yep. Now we're done. We're done now. She's gone on Instagram ahead of Thanksgiving to stand up. This is Billy the Goat. Billy Goat? Yeah. Okay.

To stand up for turkeys. Now, you've lost somebody doing this before. Somebody stormed out when you did this last time. So calm down. Carry on, Megan. Before I bloody storm out. And apologies, apologies. Respect for your segment.

Nothing but respect. So Billy has stood up for turkeys. Now this is the Billy the Australian Kettle. Yeah, put it under the fire next to the Billy bong. 100%, yep. She said, turkeys are some of the most gentle creatures in the world and 46 million of them are killed

every Thanksgiving. Has she met a turkey? I haven't. They're nuts. I don't know. I can't speak to the... I mean, yeah, I haven't met one. I don't know if I'd call them the most gentle creatures, but I mean, they don't deserve to... 46 million are killed every year.

She said, I know it's hard to change traditions, but just keep it in mind, along with, like, she put a winky face. Okay. I don't know what she hears about chickens. Yeah, there's a lot of those that are, yeah, far nicer birds, far more edible. are, yeah. Far nicer birds. Far more edible.

Now, this was Billy Zane from Titanic. That is the latest. Oh, my God, Billy Zane. That's the latest. Thanks to liquid self-service laundromats, wash and dry duvets from $8 and under an hour. Always good to hear from Billy Corgan of the Session. Okay, you're done.

Google Billy. He did. Of course he did. 23, what's that Billy, that famous actor who was in all those 80s movies? Billy Corgan of the Searching Party. Okay, you're done. Google Billy's. He did. Of course he did. 23. What's that Billy that famous actor who was in all those 80s movies? I just said. Billy who? Billy Zane.

No. Oh, there's someone else. Oh, damn it. Anyway. Billy the Vampire Slayer. Damn it. It's on the tip of my tongue. Anyway.

Billy Porter. Billy Baldwin. No. Maybe I'm thinking of someone else. Next on the tip of my tongue. Billy Porter. Billy Baldwin. No, maybe I'm thinking of someone else. Next on the show. No, good story. I think you should continue. Billy actor from the 80s. Everyone's going to want to know what it is now.

I've got a shout out to make next. That's weird, Vaughn. Yeah, it is a bit weird. Billy Bob Thornton. Billy Bob Thornton. Billy Bob Thornton. How did we miss Billy Bob Thornton? I would have also gone with the actor married to Angelina Jolie that time. I'm not letting that define him.

Bad Santa. Good for you. Yes, Bad Santa is Billy Bob Thornton. Yeah, that's good to hear. I've got a shout out to make some medical professionals next on the show. Oh, medical professionals. Medical professionals. Who we just have to respect.

ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. I just want to give a little shout out to the cath lab team at Waikato. Cath. Yeah, cath lab. Like Catherine. Yes. Kath and Kim. Cardiac catheterization.

Catheterize. Is that like catheter? Catheter. Yes. So like catheter? Catheter. Yes. So like a tube inserting. That makes sense. Bit of a backstory here. My dad gave us a bit of a health scare.

Well, he gave me a scare. He never seemed too worried about it. He gave me a hell of a fright. He had to go to hospital. His heart was not beating enough. Yeah, that's... And yeah, so it freaked me out. Continues to freak me out. This happened at the start of the week, didn't it?

Yeah, yeah. So he went to hospital and he's like, no, it's all good. And then he called me, he's like, well, I'm getting a pacemaker. And I was like, holy shit. Quite a sort of a realisation that he's... So that helps your heart pump, right? Is that what a pacemaker does?

So the thing he had, he didn't have a heart attack. They thought he might have. He just has the electrical impulses between different parts

of the heart that are like, I'll go, you go. I'll go, you go. Yeah. And keeping like a rate wasn't working properly from what I can understand.

Right. In layman's terms. So a pacemaker can have two wires or three wires and it just tells your heart when to beat. Wow. It's got a little go, go, go, go, go, go, go. So I think they set it at about 60 and it just pumps. See, like you get...

This is when... I was like, I've got to tell Fletch about this like you get... This is when Dan was telling me, I was like, I've got to tell Fletch about this because you get alerts from your Apple Watch being like, are you dead? Your heart's not beating. But your heart goes down to like 40 beats or something. I know, sometimes I wake up in the morning. That's where Dan's was at and they were like,

that's not good. Oh my God, do I need one? They were like, that's not good. You should maybe, maybe you should just go like... No, because yours does pick up when you need it to. Right. But there'd be times where he would then like try to do something on the farm. Yep.

And it wouldn't be doing it. It wouldn't be picking up the beats quick enough. Right. And so that's why I needed a pacemaker. Yeah. So he. That's crazy. He's got a pacemaker.

Which I'd always heard about that you can't stand next to big magnets. But given that I'd never had a person close to me get one, I never really looked it up. Thinking of beep at an airport? He can't go through the big whirly magnet that they look at your penis on. I know, they can see your dick. Did you know this? They reckon that they

toned it down so they can't, but you know they can. They're saving two images, high quality for later and quick zap you're carrying a gun for now. Yeah, if you look at can. They're saving two images, high quality for later and quick, zappy, are you carrying a gun for now? Yeah, if you look at Sharon behind the machine, when guys walk through, sometimes their eyebrows go up. Sometimes Sharon has to be taken off the machine because she's letting hostile threats through

because they've got an absolute knockout dong. She's missing the axe in the back pocket. And they pick people they want to go through them, eh? 100%. They're like, Sharon, do back pocket. And they pick people they want to go through them, eh? 100%. They're like, Sharon, do you want to sue this one? They picked me once. They made the assumption that just because you're six foot two, you might have a big wang.

And I tell you what, I sadly put that myth to bed. Sadly put that myth to bed. So, yeah, Dad had his pacemaker put in yesterday. Right, and he had the surgery, so it all went well? Yep, yep, it went well. And they said to him, what music do you want to listen to? Because he was awake. So he was awake.

They're the local, and they go, your collarbone, and they just like shove it down. Three wires, one on the front of the heart, one on the back of the heart, and one just down the hole. They go in your shoulder. Yeah. And they do it from there. And they just, like, poke it in.

Yeah. That's wild. And he's awake. Yeah. Madness. He also had every bloody person's life story that he was in the ward with. I knew about everybody's, someone from Gisborne's entire health history who's in a bed next to.

What music did he pick to listen to? Well, he's like, oh, I don't know. And they said, you know, we can do radio stations or whatever. And he's like, oh, I suppose we could put on, he's like, oh, you could put on ZM, I suppose. And they were like, why is that? And he said he knew what they were up to. No, he didn't.

And I was like, what do you mean? And he's like, well, they knew And I was like What do you mean And he's like Well They knew who I was I'm like what Ian Smith Did you do Do you know who I am On the operating table And anyway

Yeah they were They were familiar With the legend That is old man Ian So Oh they knew Word travels Yeah

So he was high on I mean Smiths we do have a record for getting high on these painkillers that they give us during operations and chatting

and not knowing what we've said afterwards. But he reckons he can recall the entire conversation. So I just wanted to, and then they said, can we have a shout out?

What? They're medical professionals. Yeah, but medical professionals love to hear their names on the radio too. I don't have any specific names and I couldn't even say the cath lab properly.

Yeah. Cardiac. If anyone deserves a shout out, it's medical professionals. Yes, at Waka for Hospital. Fantastic. So, yeah, thanks for looking after my dad and getting it all beaten again, as it should be. That's nice.

And to all medical professionals, because what a hell of a time to be in the profession, facing the uncertainty of all this COVID junk, as well as working bloody hard, in what sometimes can be a thankless task. Yeah. Yep. ZM's Fleshborn and Megan.