ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 27th January 2021

Episode Date: January 26, 2021

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Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Morn and Megan podcast with Hayley Sproul. The show is thanks to McCafe. Download the Maccas app to get McCafe rewards today. It's nothing new that sort of celebrations or holidays get pushed on us way too early. Halloween's happening in August and, you know, there's Easter eggs and stuff. Yeah, I've noticed Easter eggs creeping in. Oh, many Easter eggs. It's January.

And the buns in the supermarket. Yeah. Already. You know, the one that drives me mad is Valentine's day. Valentine's day has been shoved in every direction at me. It is only two and a half weeks away. But is it even something that we need to make a fuss about? Do you guys do a Valentine's day?

No, because Shade's birthday is the next day. Oh yeah. So you pair them up, pair them up. I just feel like at the moment, all the ads you see at this Valentine's Day? No, because Sade's birthday is the next day. Oh, yeah. You pair them up. Pair them up. I just feel like at the moment, all the ads you see are, this Valentine's Day, give her something that's going to make her happy. And it feels premature to me.

Do you not want a present? No, I don't do Valentine's Day. Okay. We've been together for 10 years, Aaron and I. Right, so the flame's gone. Oh, it is. Extinguished. It's not even smoking anymore. It's not even smoking anymore.

It's not even a fire. We could throw in some tindergrite cannerberry grass and not see her. It has rained. We put the sand over the top. It's been thoroughly sanded. There's just something about the way that people market

Valentine's Day that makes me not want to be a part of it. Yeah, right. Gift for her. Like, who's buying diamonds on Valentine's Day? To make her happy. To part of it. Yeah, right. Gift for her. Like, who's buying diamonds on Valentine's Day? To make her happy.

To make her happy. She's miserable. I'll tell you what's going to make me happy, and it's not diamonds. What is it? Sax. Oh, saxophone. That's, yeah. You love a bit of sax.

A bit of Kenny Baker. A bit of Kenny G. Yeah, Baker Street. It's just too much. I don't want a bar of it at all. ZM. Hit music. Live ZM six. Fletch Warne and Megan with Hayley Sproul. You nearly forgot Megan's name. Out of sight, out of mind. Isn't that terrible? Gosh. Just pausing for effect. And which one?

What's her name holder? I was actually multitasking, trying to open up the weather temperatures, the current weather temperatures. Oh, it's skyrocketing this week, isn't it? Hearing Rachel talk about the highs yesterday. It was records yesterday, wasn't it? An ash burden. Yeah. A new record.

But, yeah, more of the same today. Currently the highest temperature in the country, 23.6. Currently? And COVID in, yes, right now. It's six o'clock in the morning. You're sleeping nude, eh, with no blanket. With the fan on. And the fan on.

Nude and fan on. You're going to wake up very dry. The wind's been blowing air up your nose all night. Yeah. You go to the bathroom and you drink straight out the tap. Yeah. That's good taste. That's a good tasting water, eh? Straight out the tap.

Sucking out a faucet. It does taste better. Yeah. Do you, because you've got air con, do you sleep with that in the bedroom? Yeah. Because I don't have air con at my place. No, neither. If I ever stay at like a hotel or a motel and there have air con at my place. No, neither. If I ever stay at like

a hotel or a motel and there's air con, I'm always like, I'm going to put it on real cold and then, yeah, you wake up in the morning and you're just like.

Super dry. It was so dry. Real low fan. Just. Low fan. Play the long game. Play a low fan. Don't like blast yourself

with Arctic. Six fans. We don't have, we don't have air con and we've just got one of those little fans that we blow at our feet all night long. Just the feet?

Yeah, well, that's the hottest bit. So you poke your little feet at the body. Because it's buried deepest in the dirt, aren't you? Oh, no, I can't poke my feet. Even if I have no sheet, I've got to be tucked in with my feet. Yeah, because of monsters. Oh, no, no.

The sheet's just a gesture for me. I'm predominantly out. Leg out, feet out, arms out, head out. People are sharing those hacks with fans at this time of year. You know, there's that one where you can put like a little bit of, like a tub of ice in front of your fan or behind it. Homemade air con. Homemade air con.

I might try that. Or people suggest putting, you crack a window, eh, and you put the fan right at the window. So it sucks the cold air in from outside. It sucks the cold, yeah. Oh, I like that too. And the mosquitoes and the robbers and everything else that comes through an open window.

Yeah. You could also put something that's like very tasty in front of it and it will just waft. Fries. Like a hot pie. Like a beautiful bolognese. Blow. Oh, yeah, I love smelling and sleeping in the smell of

Bolognese that was your go to smell Bolognese but you know when you walk into the house and someone's cooking onions and garlic it's been on the stove for 3-4 hours I always say that smells amazing, what is that?

it's garlic, that's all I've put in the pan so far amazing what's that now? I've just chucked the onions in there. Just onions and garlic. I've never eaten it just by itself, but that smells great. Alright, the top six is coming up on the show soon. Yep.

Forgotten. Top six New Zealand bands that could also have instant kiwi scratchies. I can't but executive producer Anton Anja told Vaughn in his earpiece. Unbelievable. I was going to let him flail. I wanted to see him flail a little bit.

No, because I just would have said, I've forgotten. And then just been like, I just would have sat here and it would have been a standoff. So there are new Scratchies and they're 660 themed. Yes. Now. There's a little bit of, what would you call it? Backlash. Backlash. I was going to say slap themed. Yes. Now. There's a bit of a, a little bit of a, what would you call it?

Backlash? Backlash. I was going to say slap back. Slap back. Slap back to reality. What's the backlash that, because obviously it's Galloway. They are a band that appeals to

every New Zealander and in that group of appeal, children. Yeah. So are they cancelled? Um, no. Because you remember we worked

for that radio station and they had a scratchy. So we should cancel them too. We always got off lightly with that. I was waiting for that. Well, no, it's never too late. Let's cancel them. Oh, you're talking like when you find someone's old tweet

from like 2008 and you cancel them based on that, even though their opinions and behaviour may have completely changed since then and that may have just been a temporary lapse of behaviour. Well, that sounds too sensible. But like 13 years later, we might as well just absolutely bury them. Piling them out. And they're like, sorry, he doesn't mean it. No, I do.

I promise I mean sorry. It was a long time ago. I'd burn them alive. I reckon right now there's a bunch of women hopping online to try to find something on you. They would not have to look hard. So are the top six with the 660 scratchy. Top six other Kiwi musicians that need scratchies.

Okay. Coming up next on the show though. A treat for dogs. There is a new way to treat your dog and as a cat woman, I think it's gone too far. Am I the only one here whose memory is working? Yeah. Yeah.

Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast ZM. It is 11 past 6. Now, do you guys have dogs? Yes, I've got two dogs. Two dogs. You're a cat? I'm just a cat. I'm a cat man. He's an old dog himself. And he's up to all sorts of new tricks.

I'm a cat person as well. He's a naughty little mongrel. You little mutt. A naughty little mongrel? Yeah. He's had animal control caught on him. Savaging. Savaging the postman. This is just the regular. You're the meter reader.

This is just the usual slander that I have to put up with. I just love that you've got a mongrel on air. Hump a little leg, don't you? Now look, I love a dog. But people, dog people, you just baffle me. And now dog owners are making charcuterie boards for their dogs, otherwise known as a platter. Right, a meat, primarily meat platter.

Primarily meat platter, sort of a cracker on the side, a little bit of a dip happening. Actually, they have tux. Remember the old tux triangle biscuits? They'd be a wonderful cracker. Yeah, and they dip it into some sort of meat mousse. It would never break. But, you know, like grazing platters went crazy online in the last couple of years,

and people are taking them to the extremes, and now they're making them for dogs. These pictures of these sweet little dogs, and they've got sort of curled up meats, little chewy sticks, little nibbly balls, some meat mousses. But then there'd be, but you couldn't just put four dogs down because they might get a bit like.

Yeah. But growl at each other. Are these for special occasions, like a dog's birthday or? Generally people are putting photos saying, you know, a way to treat your pet for their birthday. But, I mean, it's sort of, they look quite alluring in terms of, you know, people putting bright colours. It looks like I would reach for this.

I was going to say, like, you arrive at the party late and a little bit drunk. Yeah, and you're like, oh my God, I'm bloody starving. And then this one here's got a sardine in the middle, which would be all right. And then there's a very hairy hog snout, which I would not want to pick up and chew on accidentally

if that's a dog platter. Right. It's very cute for Instagram, but the dog's going to ravish that presentation immediately. You hit the nail on the head there. It's all about the gram, isn't it? It is. I also ravish the presentation of a charcuterie board.

Are you that person? Aaron does that. He just tucks into a board and mixes it all together and you're like, no, no, no, no, no. I love it in the end when everything's like mushed that shouldn't be mushed. You know how there's always some chocolate on there? Yeah. Which I'm a bit weird about. It's all like meats and cheeses and then there's like a little bit of chocolate.

It's got a bit of basil pesto on it. Yeah, I love that. Some hummus. It's smeared in hummus. You get that flavour cocktail at the end and you just chuck it in and you're like, a bit of everything there. I just feel like maybe we've got, here's the greatest pun of them all, a bark-cutery board. Right. Yeah, that was my response as well.

We've got a dog's birthday coming up. Yep. A bark-cutery board. Shove some fruit, nuts, maybe not nuts, meat. Just put some meat and some bickies on a board. Yeah, check what dogs can and cannot eat. Yeah. So not chalky.

Oh, because you can't, they can't eat chocolate. No. Is it onions they're not supposed to eat? I think so, yeah. Avocado, also a no-no. Oh, this board has a big avocado on it. Oh, they have just killed their dog. Oh, my Lord.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Well, there is, and you know what? This could be two segments. This could be yummy, yummy, where we talk about new foods. Or this could be don't get Fletch started, where you wind me up about things. Okay. That I've complained about.

Yeah. Because there's a new chocolate bar variant. Correct. in town. The Twirl Breakaway. Now, the Twirl original was quite a small one, eh?

It was like a... Yeah, because there's the Caramel Twirl, which is real good. Yeah. And it's like a chocolate outer and inside is like

wavy lines of the chocolate. So that's all it is. That's all it is. It was just chocolate. Yep. So like a chocolate-covered flake. Well, they have now launched the breakaway,

and they have inserted a wafer into the twirl. So now that's kind of, okay, I'm looking at it. I'm semi-familiar with this controversy attached to you. Because it's very, you get two bars in the thing and they're small enough already. Now to me, wafers in chocolate are like rice and noodles

at the Chinese buffet. Oh yeah, avoid them. They're space fillers. It's not bringing anything to the table. They want that put there so you don't eat all the meaty goodness and the good bits at the buffet. You know what I mean?

If you just take the wafer part and eat it on its own, you'd be most disappointed. Well, I'm even disappointed when it's in a chocolate bar. I mean, I do like a bit of a crunch.

Unless it's that big, you know, what's that big Kit Kat one? That's a big one. The chunky. Those are good because they're huge. They're massive.

They're big and so you get the wafer but you wouldn't be able to bite through it. You wouldn't be able to bite through it. You wouldn't be able to bite through it if it was solid chocolate. Exactly. You'd snap your tooth.

You would. Whereas the Twirl, I'm like, this is a cheeky idea. You cheeky shit. To get less chocolate in the Twirl. Yeah. So I think I'm avoiding this one, and I'll just go for the Caramilk one.

I've just looked up the Twirl was 39 grams. Yep. The Twirl Breakaaway, 40 grams. So it's only a gram heavier. But they're saying it's bigger because now it's got wafer in it. But it's only added a gram over that entire space. Yeah, but a wafer is famously lightweight. Yeah.

Wafer weight. But they've just taken away. That means they've taken away actual chocolate and given that weight to the wafer. Yeah, exactly. So when you bite into anything chocolate and there's wafer in it, you just think to yourself, that could be chocolate. That's a wafer. Yeah, exactly. So when you bite into anything chocolate and there's wafer in it, you just think to yourself, that could be chocolate. That's a wafer of space.

Yeah. Hey, yo. I saw this rear its head over the weekend. Madeline Chapman, who's a New Zealander, she wrote Jacinda Ardern's book that came out in Stephen Adams' book. She's an author.

Did they do nothing? Huh? Oh, no, Jacinda did it because it was an unofficial biography that Stephen Adams, I think she sat down. Oh right, okay. So she did an investigation. She bit into a timeout. Are you familiar

with timeouts? Yes. She bit into a timeout and then held the cross section of the timeout next to the picture of the new Toil Breakaway. The Toil Breakaway is just a timeout. Oh my God, I'm looking at a two now. They're exactly the same.

I don't have any time for the timeout. It's a rubbish chocolate bar. No one reaches for it. It's the worst when you get one in the favourites. Do you think that they're trying to phase out the timeout and rebrand it? As the Twirl, because the Twirl sells better and it's a better brand.

Everyone knows that Time Out sucks. The Time Out bar is the light chocolate coating and then it goes wafers is the next and then the inside is that ripple chocolate. That's exactly what the Cadbury Twirl Breakaway is. I for one will be

boycotting the Breakaway. There's a Wikipedia page that talks about the timeout. It says discontinuations and rebrandings is one of the subheadings. As of 2016, timeout has been discontinued in New York, Japan, Canada, South Africa, blah, blah, blah, Judy Paul sales. It was replaced with a single bar version called timeout wafer. And in Australia, timeout was rebranded as Twirl Breakaway in January 2021.

Okay, so that's what they've done. So it's just a Time Out. Well, there you go. Now we've let the people know. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Smarter than multinational. That'll teach you to take your Cadbury factory out of Dunedin. I'm sure they're hurting.

And now I do just feel like chocolate. So you've won in the end, Cadbury. Flesh, fawn and Megan. The podcast. ZM. they're hurting. And now I do just feel like chocolate. So you've won in the end! You can't breathe. There's been a study that has kind of, I think this has been long speculated. That's why when you were young, were you ever encouraged to take up a musical instrument? Oh, not really. I don't think so. Right. I went

to record a class at primary school once. I think that's why they do those sorts of musical classes at school. I lasted one, the teacher wouldn't let me. Record, everyone learned to record in New Zealand, didn't we?

We all had a little toot on the, little toot on the flute. Toot on the flute. Yeah. Yeah, I learned piano my whole life. What age did you start? What age did you start?

Six. Right. That's the good age, apparently that's the good time to start. Okay. That's, because apparently

people who have been trained in music from a young age have a super connected brain compared to those who don't. What does that mean, connected? Like your left and your right works really well together and the different hemispheres of the brain talk to each other fluidly. Right.

Do you think you're super connected and smarter? I don't know. I always thought I was a left-brained person. Which one's that? Creativity, emotional. That's me. If I was a parent, what did you want your six-year-old banging about on drums and a piano?

No bloody way. Mate, the crap my parents put up with for years before I got good. God bless them. The keyboard would be the way because you could plug the headphones in. Yes. No, I had, I got, when my mum decided I was going to learn piano, she, the first piano I got was an upright, like a big loud one. Oh, yep.

And a lady died and it was for free. And so my parents picked it up and I played this dead woman's clanger for ages. You've got to be careful with your dead woman's clangers. It was a rye clanger. And so I learned how to play piano on this horrible thing. It would have been awful for ages. And then I got... Did you have to...

Did someone have to come to your house and tune it? We had a piano growing up, and every couple of years... Yeah, and you've got to be silent. Yeah, and they'd go, ting, and whack a fork, and be like, mmm, bong, mmm, ting, bong, ting. And it was like this whole thing. And we'd just, as kids, I remember standing there and being like, hey, that's weird.

And the person would be like, shh, I'm tuning the piano. I know, and then they show off at the end. They play a little tune and they're always better than you. And they're like, perfect. It's ready to be played. Bloody perfect. And then they'd disappear with their creepy briefcase perfect. It's ready to be played. Bloody perfect. And then they disappear with their creepy briefcase. But that's a dying art too.

I remember reading like last year, if you've got a piano, it's bloody hard to get it tuned because piano tuners are a dying breed. I learned how to tune a piano. It's not too hard. You twist the little thing. Yeah, they twist the little knobbies. Yep, get them in there. But then you've got to know what the right sound is, don't you?

Yeah, well, that's... That's how you get your tuning forks. Oh, right. You get tuning forks, but yeah. Remember those things at school and you'd bang them and they'd go... The vibrating thing and you'd put them on your teeth and it would blow a filling out? It would break in a wine glass.

Yeah. I always had a wine glass at primary school. I do feel, though, when I think back about... Because I played piano my whole life. I still play. And I did all the exams and all that kind of cramming in, like, you know,

practice two hours a day, blah, blah, blah. Well, my mum's going to laugh when she hears that. I had to get forced to practice a lot as a stroppy kid. But I do feel like

it has some of the benefits of doing it still apply to me. Like, I've got a really good memory and I'm really good at learning scripts, which is great for an actor. And I've got a really good memory and I'm really good at learning scripts, which is great for an actor. And I think that's because of like the visual,

looking at sheet music and then you've got to take it away for your competitions and your exams and stuff. Yeah, like literally 25 minutes ago, you forgot what you were about to do next. So I've got an excellent memory. Yep. And it still stays with me today. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

From the ZM Think Tankletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. There is a little bit of controversy around New Zealand's band of the moment, 660. Who do I 660 Saturdays? And the crowds are insane. Next level. I saw another news site sharing one of their photos from the Hastings.

Napier Hastings concert at the weekend. Yes. Just like, because you know at the moment Britain are contemplating or about to apparently bring in the hotel quarantine for all international arrivals. And somebody shared that saying, oh, this was New Zealand at the weekend. And everyone's like, well, yeah,

but they started kind of 12 months ago. Yeah. Like we're kind of screwed. So who knows how that's going to go. But yeah, a lot of people holding up what's happening in New Zealand at the moment. Yeah. But there's a little bit of controversy

because 660 have put their name to an instant Kiwi. So there's that whole, with their wide fan base, are they encouraging people to gamble? I mean, I don't need encouragement. I love a scratchy. I'd imagine you love a crossword. Oh, I love a crossword. I love a Sudoku. What?

Is there a scratchy Sudoku? No, no, no, no. Oh, you mean a crossword scratchy. Oh, yeah. The best of both worlds. I just mean a pure... Oh, you just mean anything. A pure analogue Sudoku.

But every time I go into the dairy, whatever I'm buying, be it nuts or lollies, I get a scratchy. I love a scratchy. I can't even leave the supermarket without getting just a little $1 because you never know,

it could be $10,000. I'm not addicted to gambling. That's what we call a gambling problem no it's not I just buy scratches every day and I never win that's your kiwi saver

I'll never stop it's your kiwi saver yeah I've withdrawn it and yeah a buck here a buck there trying to win the big one

well there's yeah there's controversy there's backlash yeah right I think there's been a comment that the good would come from it far outweighs the bad

because that's the thing. It has to all go back into the community. Money made from that, from the Lotteries Commission. Yeah, true. But, I mean, take it whatever. All or some? Huh? I don't know.

All profits. Right. Right. They would have got paid to do it though, right? They would have got paid. Yeah, well, their faces are on the Instant Kiwi. Yeah. Yeah.

So it's not charity. Imagine if they were paid in Instant Kiwis. How do you want to be paid? Cash or Kiwis? I could take the cash or I could take the scratches. You would take the scratches. Because you might get the $100,000. And what a great way to pass the time.

Yeah. So the top six Kiwi musicians that also need instant Kiwis. Okay. Number six, Dave Dobbins, Slice of Seven. Scratch three lucky sevens and win it all. I like that. I couldn't imagine Dave Dobbins doing that. No.

Nah, probably not. He doesn't seem like the type, eh? Nah. Doesn't seem like he's worried about that sort of thing. He's sort of a folksy, you know, like an old school guy. I'm not calling him old. He is though. I didn't say folksy.

He is old. He's old. He's mature. He's been around for a while. He's had a good time. The other day, biked past a building site. And you know how builders put their name outside? Yeah.

It was like Dobbin Builders or something. And I was like, I wonder if that's Dave Dobbin's brother. It's a relative. Dobbin Builders. I thought you were going to say you bike. Dean Dobbin. Dean Dobbin Builders or something. And I was like, I wonder if that's Dave Dobbin's brother. It's a relative. Dobbin Builders. I thought you were going to say you bought. Dean Dobbin. Dean Dobbin Builders. Would you like a slice of heaven?

Yes. We'll build your slice of heaven. Yes. Or renovate your slice of heaven. It's really good. It's really good. There was no catchy slogan like that. If there's any Dobbins out there, feel free to use that.

You're missing a track. He's got to be related. You never hear that name, apart from Dave Dobbin. Hayley Jane Dobbin. No, it's a rare name. Just for a moment there, imagining that you'd married Dave Dobbin. No, I was just imagining. I was probably more part

of the family. I'm more of a Dean Dobbin girl. I've searched Dobbin. You've got on Facebook, there's Nick Dobbin. I've even got a mutual friend with Nick Dobbin. There's Suzanne Dobbin girl. I've searched Dobbin. You've got on Facebook, there's Nick Dobbin. I've even got a mutual friend with Nick Dobbin. There's Suzanne Dobbin, Karma Dobbin. Don't read out all the Dobbins. Dave Dobbin. Dave Dobbin's just on Facebook.

Oh, no, that's a different. Oh, my God. There's a guy called Dave Dobbin who's probably about the same age as Dave Dobbin. Nah, you'd say your name was David, wouldn't you? Yeah. Or change it. Dabeen. David Dabeen.

I'm David Dabeen. Number five on the list of the top six Kiwi musicians that need instant Kiwis are, oh, I'll have a lotto Powerball and then with the money left over, I'll have Lady Lord's Lines of Luck. Lady Lord's. You've never seen a diamond in the flesh.

So if you scratch one, you get a cut of Lord's Royals Royalties. Oh, okay. Yeah, nice. Royal Royalties. Royalties from royals. I couldn't imagine her signing up for a scratchy either. No, I don't think she wouldn't be associated. She wouldn't do it. Number four on the list of the top six

Kiwi musicians that need instant Kiwis are Josh685's Savage Scratchy. You scratch all the symbols and if you scratch the savage love dance from TikTok, the me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. If you scratch

those symbols in the right order, you win Jason Derulo. Oh, wow. Okay. I reckon you've got a real future in this industry, Vaughn. I've always said I could invent board games and scratches. You could. I believe in you games and scratches. You could. I believe in you.

Come on. Live your dream. Come on. Lottery's commission. Get me on board. Number three on the list of the top six Kiwi musicians that need instant Kiwis. The Split Ends split the difference. Oh, okay.

Yeah. If you scratch both Thin Brothers on one line, you win. Yeah. I'd love to give you some other Split Ends knowledge, but I don't know anyone else that was in any of those bands. And I just know they had a leaky boat. They did. They spent six months in it.

They spent six months in it. Rather than just fixing it. It must have been a small hole if they spent six months in it. Imagine the mould. Imagine the middle tube. How small would the hole be in a leaky boat for it to last six months? Like microscopic. It would have to be tiny.

I wouldn't call it a hole. Yeah, a hairline fracture. And it wouldn't squirt and it would do one of those like persistent drips. Yeah. Like you'd see it beating and then it would drip

and then it would beat again and drip. Okay. Then six months is a long time. Split the internet and look for that hairline fracture. Unless they were constantly bailing themselves out.

Might have had a pump. Yeah. I believe it's called a bilge pump themselves out. Might have had a pump. Yeah. I believe it's called a bilge pump. A bilge pump on a boat, yeah. Number two on the list of the top six Kiwi musicians that need scratches, Solomio Trio. Okay. That's where you scratch three handsome men with voices like golden syrup

on your ticket to win big. Okay, you're nice. Because there's always lots of three on Instant Kiwis. Yeah, there is. So there's a handy that's a trio there. And number one on the list of the top six always lots of three on Instant Kiwis. Yeah, there is. That's a trio there. And number one on the list of the top six Kiwi musicians that need Instant Kiwis are Benny's Big Bonus Bucks. Oh, good alliteration. Yeah, you scratch the whole song of Benny's.

Yep. Each line is 15 seconds from her song. And if you get the 15 seconds it matches up perfectly with the 15 seconds everybody knows from TikTok you win big right good

wow great ideas there I know I'm getting fizzed about them it's not even real yeah but you've got a gambling problem we're definitely

certified on the show today as soon as we wrap this up I'm gonna get scratching I've got a few in my bag no you can't buy them

to what time can you buy a scratchy from 7 in the morning 9 in the morning there's limits on the time yeah bag. No, you can't buy them. To what time can you buy a scratchy from? Seven in the morning, nine in the morning. Is there limits on the time? Yeah, there's time limits. You can't like go in in the middle of the night to a servo that also does scratchies and buys a no-go

till like nine in the morning. That's only quarter to seven. Hang in there with some drinking. Yeah, I might have a wine. That's the time. That is today's top six. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Just Google Maps-ing the exact location of Omanawa Falls.

It's by McLaren Falls. Okay. And it's just down the road from Julia's Edible Weeds. There you go. Okay, in what area? The Bay of Plenty. The Bay of Plenty. Yeah, Western Bay of Plenty. Okay. The Mexican Hammock Store is just down the go. Okay, in what area? The Bay of Plenty. The Bay of Plenty? Yeah, Western Bay of Plenty. Okay. The Mexican Hammock

Store is just down the road. Okay, there's been a warning about these falls. Don't jump off them. Yeah. I mean, there's been plenty of signs there saying don't. That's just bloody stupid. And now there's been an official request for a Red Bull cliff diver. So this is

someone who... I'm imagining they've jumped off that massive bridge. Where's that massive bridge in Europe? And it's really high. Oh, yeah, yeah. Wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, wee, splosh. Because the Omanawa Falls is closed, isn't it? Like there's...

Because, yeah, I've had friends that have gone there, and they put it all on the Instagram story. They climb the fence and everything, and it's like full on. I was like, you guys are naughty. Very naughty. It's closed for a very good reason. Or even this year, a man's died there. Another man's drowned in 2018.

There's been various rescues and people hurting themselves at the falls. But apparently this German Red Bull diver posted to her 288,000 TikTok followers her diving off the very top of the falls. Can I say she does a very good dive. So elegant. It's Olympic standard. Well, most of them are ex-Olympic divers, aren't they? Yeah.

The Red Bull cliff divers. So they, I mean, I guess they know what they're doing. She does a flip and does that tuck thing, you know, she extends her legs in the middle of it. I'm impressed. I encourage this behaviour.

So she came to New Zealand before the COVID lockdown and then it happened and she's been here ever since. Right. She's getting bored and she's like, I'm going to go

climb some fences and jump some cliffs. And AJ Hackett's like, excuse me? That's my thing. Calm down. I'm the New Zealander that jumps off things. So what, they're asking her to take it down. Yeah AJ Hackett's like, excuse me? That's my thing. Calm down. I'm the New Zealander that jumps off things.

So what, they're asking her to take it down. Yeah, because it's encouraging other people and there's sort of this big surge

in social media. Like you say, people go there and put up videos of them jumping the fences that are kind of like keeping people safe and jumping off.

Anyway, I never see a waterfall and I'm like, you know, I'd love to jump off it. That's never my first thought. I always think, is there a secret cave behind that waterfall? Yes., you know, I'd love to jump off that thing. No, yeah. That's never my first thought. I always think, is there a secret cave behind

that waterfall? Yes! Because, you know, TV and movies and cartoons always tell us there are secret caves. And it's full of gold. Yeah, and there never is. No. So don't go to Omanawa to find gold or jump off the cliff. You're not going to like either of those things.

No. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. I want to talk about your family's unique, maybe family recipes. These are generally in an old red cookbook with a handwritten recipe in there. Or mum just knows it off the top. Oh, yeah, yeah. My nana knew all of her recipes off the top of her dome. She had freestyle. But she always got the book out anyway, but she never looked at the book.

But she said it was just out of habit. But I remember that. And that book would be worth it. Oh, for sure. It's got some Smith family secrets in that thing. It's brown and smeared and sauce and butter. There's a bit of, yeah, there's all these mysterious stains all through it.

And then there's a page torn out and you're like, what was on that page? That's a recipe we don't talk about. Yeah. The lost recipe. We ate the cat. Times were tough after the war.

We ate anything we could get our hands on. Cat curry won't be happening again though. Oh damn. So the other day when I was doing some preserving,

mate Sam sent through saying Margaret Bain would be proud. Now that's when I learned that, I was like, what? Do you know Margaret Bain of the famous Bain family be proud. Now, that's when I learned that. I was like, what? Do you know Margaret Bain of the famous Bain family?

Yeah. Monster preserver. She preserved everything. Apparently, when the policeman did it, they asked him, bloody preserving jars full of God knows what everywhere. I wonder if they ate it or if they just chucked it. You know, imagine having a little bit of a cracker, a cheese on cracker. Yeah, with a bit of quince.

With a bit of Margaret Bain's quince paste. Yes, I would. If I could get my hands on a jar of sweet Margaret's plum. I didn't even know that. I didn't know that was a thing. Was that in the TV show that came out last year? No, I think it was a missed detail. Right.

Okay, fascinating. Of the extreme lengths. And then he said, I should get you my grandma's famous pickled onions recipe. I was like, I love, and that's when I said, I love like grandma's recipes because they're always good.

Right. And he said, oh, the best in her book was curry chips. What? That's very British. Dad still makes it every holiday season, not chips like hot chips. A whole bunch of different chips,

crackers and nuts. So you'd get like either Ripples or Bluebird salt and vinegar chips and all kinds of chips. Corn chips. Like you could use grain waves, those sorts of chips. Slop them in curry. Slop a curry

and nuts and crackers and you slop a curry sauce all over it and re-bake it in the oven. It's curry chips and then we still make it every... Wait, you re-bake it? Yeah. So you cover the entire thing in a layer of curry and re-bake it. And then I'm just assuming you just eat it like nachos.

You just get it in a num-num-num-num. I'm not down for that. Chips, like bags of chips. That's one of those classic recipes making the most out of everything you've got. Yeah. But do the chips stay hard or do they go soggy? You're re-baking them.

There must be a stiffness to them. Like a nacho, you get a bit of sog. Towards the end, there's a sog. But if you're baking it, does the curry kind of go into a hard kind of a gelatin? Maybe. Like layer. I think maybe we're also imagining too much curry. It could almost be like the curry sauce is a coating to the chip.

Oh, I'm imagining a full takeaway curry. Like an inch thick of curry. It could almost be like the curry sauce is a coating to the chip. Oh, I'm imagining a full takeaway curry. Like an inch thick of curry. Yes, yeah, yeah, same. Covering all the chips. That's too much curry sauce. What a bloody mess. That is a weird recipe.

I know. My family's weird recipe is a curry. There was this, our family's favourite restaurant, Maharajah's, did this lemon and honey butter chicken. And when I was a kid,

it's all I ever ordered. And it was insane. And it was super sweet. And then so my mum came up with an idea of, this is the widest thing about my family, came up with a way of replicating it. So you put in the chicken in a pan, no vegetables,

chicken in the pan. Then you put honey in the pan, squeeze some lemon, and then a bot of cream, and there's your lemon honey curry. And we would eat that with rice and naan. Okay, that actually sounds really yum. It's like a lemon chicken. A whole bot of cream in with... It is so

yum. Does it thicken? It thickens right up. Probably not as much as if you were making a spiced, you know, sort of a paste-based curry. But it's enough and it's delicious. And that's the famous family recipe. That's the famous family recipe. In fact, in year third, no, in third form,

when I went to high school and I did home economics, and we did cooking, I cooked it for my home economics teacher who was Indian. And I think I might have insulted her not only because of this three ingredient curry but also because I undercooked the chicken and it was raw.

So that's not part of the Sproul family recipe. Do cook the chicken. Want to try that? So we want to open up the phone lines this morning and ask if you've got a recipe like this in your family. Like a weird family recipe. Whenever you talk to someone about it, you think it's normal and when you're explaining it is at the point you realise

that this is a weird family recipe. Yeah. Like I remember that was like us with Megan who's on maternity leave and her mum's famous chicken casserole. Yeah. Which is cooked, which has nacho chips all through it. Through it? No, primarily they're on top. They're on top.

They're used as a crust. You crush them up and you sprinkle them on the top. And was there something else in it? It's delicious. We've had it. We demanded that it be cooked for us. It's so good. Why are people putting chips in things?

I don't know. Does it make everything better? I suppose so. It's weird to me to think you might have anything left in the bag of chips that you could add to dinner the next night. Like, I open a bag of chips, I'm scumming crumbs at the bottom of that thing before the night's through. We're talking about the family recipes, and maybe they're a family secret.

And we want the weird recipes that people go, that's odd. Yeah, we have a well-guarded three-ingredient ice cream recipe as well, and we make it every Christmas, and I shall never share. And the recipe came home in my brother's kindergarten newsletter in 1980-something. She's just telling you. She's never going to tell you. I'm just trying to trick her. But is one of the ingredients ice cream, and it's stuff you add to ordinary ice cream?

Oh, God, no, no, no. Okay, so you're making it on ice cream. It's from scratch, thank you very much. One of the ingredients is cream. It requires no churner, and it is the most delicious ice cream in the world. I shall never tell. Oh, well, that. Okay, so you're making it on ice cream. It's from scratch. Thank you very much. One of the ingredients is cream. It requires no churner, and it is the most delicious ice cream in the world. I shall never tell. Oh, well, that sounds interesting.

But I did tell you my famed butter chicken recipe. You're going to have a big tip-top waiting for you after the show. You will. You're going to walk into your car. Aaron, what's the family recipe? So when we were kids, we didn't have a lot of money. So my mum used to make a mince dish and it was literally just

mince and banana. The banana was primarily to bulk up the mince. It was horrendous. Why banana? Tasted yuck. I thought you were about to tell us mince and banana were about to stumble across something we'd love. Was there any kind of

bolognese sauce or any kind of curry sauce? No, no, no. It was literally just banana and mints. Because obviously the banana dissolves up, so you didn't know it was there, but obviously banana goes through everything. Yeah. So that's all you could taste.

So now you would probably put mixed vegetables or something like that in to bulk it up. But now we just have banana. I feel your pain growing up on mints, Aaron. Do you not eat? Oh, boo-hoo. I grew up on mints. Poor me. You son of a bitch.

It's all my kids want to eat. Really? What's for dinner? Fish. Oh, yuck. We want mints. I think that's why I don't eat mints now. But we were similar. Everyone. We want mints. I think that's why I don't eat mints now. But we were similar.

Everyone grew up on mints. But on a mints dish that wasn't a dish. I mean, this banana thing is revolutionary to me. Also, New Zealanders, we're very plain joe. We're not very spicy with our bananas. No. Like, bananas get used for dessert and eating. Like, as a banana, that's all.

But a lot of people add them to curries. Yes. Which I've had. It's delicious. as a banana, that's all. But a lot of people add them to curries. Yes. Which I've had. It's delicious. Because a banana can be quite sweet. Aaron, did it make it the mint sweet? Sweet mints for dinner? No, well, it was just like, it was just completely overpowering.

Like, it was like, it was almost like the mints was there for texture, but the main part of it was the bananas. Bananas. But she denied it for years and then I obviously tell my kids that Grandma used to make this for us and she's like, no, I never did. I'm like, you 100% did.

And she's finally admitted it and she reckons that she's going to make it for us again one day. Brilliant. Love it. Excellent. Hey day. So looking forward to that. Excellent. Hey, Erin, thanks. You call Hannah.

What's your family recipe? Hi there. Hi. Hi. My family recipe is a thing called tuna roni. Tuna roni. I'm already out. It's got tuna in it and macaroni.

Yeah. So you put the whole tin of tuna with, like, the oil and some cooked pasta with peas, and you put cheese on top and you bake it. This was the Smith family fish pie. Yeah. This was what we called fish pie growing up. Oh, my God. That's basically a fish pie.

Yeah, yuck. It's one of my favourites anytime mum makes it I get so excited my brother used to pick it if it was his night to like pick what it was for dinner

he'd pick it just because he knew he knew I didn't like it really so you is that to this day why you hate churroni

and fish pies I could probably eat it nah look I'm a grown ass man I shouldn't have to eat churroni don't want to. Hey, thanks for your call.

Had some text messages in. We had a recipe called Egg Flip. It's a milkshake involving raw eggs and cinnamon. So delicious. Yuck. Oh, no. Here's a mac and cheese recipe. Mum makes a kick-ass mac and cheese.

She puts a ton of diced tomatoes in it, so it's extra saucy and also pink. No. Mac and cheese being pink. Yeah. I'm and also pink no mac and cheese being pink yeah i'm down for it because mac and cheese is boring you know if you're gonna add anything you gotta add bacon and tomato and cheese and bits of pickle and you're on your way to having like a cheeseburger no no no all right add them as well oh yeah like a like a big Mac mac and cheese. Big Mac and cheese? Like pickles. Pickles. That burger sauce?

The burger sauce from Waddy's. Lots of cheese. Lots of cheese. Bacon. And some sesame seeds on the top. Mints. Yes. And then a side of shredded lettuce.

Nah. Nah. Shut up. You're a mystery. Don't be stupid. Get out. Get out of here. It was all going so well until you said that.

Go back to work, Mum. Boo! We hate you, Mum. Somebody said, we put crushed up cheese Doritos in our falafel mixture. Oh, I hate falafel. Me too. Too dry. Too dry.

Well, you've just had bad falafel. I love falafel. Why don't you tell us how we haven't had good tofu either? You're not cooking it right. You're not cooking it right. You're not cooking it right. No, you've accidentally eaten the kitchen sponge. How have you just turned

on me so quickly? All it took was the shredded lettuce. After I was so generous with our lemon honey butter chicken recipe. The way back into our good books

is going to be that three recipe ice cream. That's the three ingredient. You son of a cream. I'll take it to the grave. Someone said, mum had a recipe called mum nachos and she made it once and we loved it. And it was one of those classic family recipes where it was just made from what was hanging around.

Yes. So they had some nacho chips in the bottom. Yeah. And then mum put a ton of baked beans over those. Yeah. And then whatever cheese we had lying around. And then sliced ham that was meant to be for our lunches the next day. Yep.

Put that on top and then a little bit more cheese. It's mum's nachos. Yum. I'd eat that. I'd eat the hell out of that. That's our super duper 1990s comfort food right there, baby. Yep. There's so many.

My friend makes butter sausage. What, like butter chicken, but butter sausages? It is literally butter chicken from a jar with cheese sizzlers sliced up and cooked in the sauce. That's unacceptable. Cheese to start and butter chicken sauce

but a sizzler. See, I could go to a food court and get a butter chicken with no chicken and just do sauce and naan. When I was a teenager you could have a cheese sizzler. When I was a teenager I used to always go to the mall curry places and say butter chicken no chicken. Isn't that terrible?

Butter chicken no chicken. Butter chicken just the sauce. Just creamy, spicy goodness. Dip that bread in there. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fletch Vaughan and Megan's Audio Ninja Warrior. Well, Audio Ninja Warrior. And Hayley, you've never played Audio Ninja Warrior before.

I'm a big fan of the franchise, and I'm interested to see how you've put a spin on it. Well, it's like the TV show, but instead of actually needing to do physical activity, you just need to get through our audio obstacle course by making sounds. Fantastic. That we give you. And our first contestant this morning is Shannon.

Good morning, Shannon. Good morning. All right. Okay. Where do you get that thing that, I just, this is from my last little bit. Where do you get that thing that says the high temperatures in New Zealand right now? Met Service. I've got it open. Do you want me to tell you the? thing that says the high temperatures in New Zealand right now? Met Service. I've got it open.

Do you want me to tell you the... I want the expected high. Can you tell me what's expected to be the most warmestest? I've only got the warmestest at the moment. What is the most warmestest right now? At the moment, it's Methvin that make the taps. 24.7. Wow.

It's 7.30 and it's 24.7 degrees. I'm going to, yeah, okay. Wake up, roll to the beach straight away. It's a long roll from me. Roll into the river and just let it do the rest of the work. If you see anybody rolling from me, just please, please give them space. We're rolling to Ilaroo. All right, Shannon, we're going to start the time out and give you sound effects.

Who's Shannon playing against? I can't remember. Don't we meet both people? Well, no, not initially. No. Jasmine. She's up against Jasmine. Jasmine is in the cone of silence, so she can't hear the sound effects.

So she won't have an advantage. Shannon, we're going to give you five sound effects. And once you've done each sound effect, you then progress on. There's six sound effects. There's six today, it turns out. We're a little rusty. And a plot twist. You can move on to the next one when we okay you.

All right, are you ready? Uh-huh. Your time, Shannon. Your time starts now. A noisy eater eating. Oh, yuck, yes. A chainsaw? That'll do me.

Yep. You scratching a 660 instant kiwi? That's good. Yeah, that's a good scratch. Dr. Ashley Bloomfield saying kia ora koutou katoa. Kia ora koutou katoa. Oh, that was bloody lovely. That was good.

A car failing to start. Yeah, that's good. That's that clicky noise. I hate the click. That clicky noise is horrible. And a dog panting in 39 degree heat in Methvin. That's good. Yes, all right. We've got your time there. heat and methane. That's good.

Yes. All right. We've got your time there. We're going to put you on hold, Shannon, and we're going to bring out from the cone of silence our next competitor. Jasmine, good morning.

Welcome to Audio Ninja Warrior. Hello. All right. You've got some stiff competition, I'll tell you what. She was quick, wasn't she? She was very quick.

No pressure, Jasmine. Your time starts now. A noisy eater eating. That's very noisy. A chainsaw. That's pretty good. You scratching a 660 themed instant kiwi. Oh, my God.

Oh, you won. That's good. I won. That's fine. Dr. Ashley Bloomfield saying, Kia ora koutou katoa. Kia ora koutou katoa. He does laugh sometimes.

He's always laughing during this pandemic. We've got another case. A car failing to start. Sorry, Sarah, what was that one? A car failing to start. Tick, tick, tick, tick. Yes! Tick, tick, tick, tick.

And a dog in 39 degrees heat in Methvin. There's no noise. Is it dead, is it? Potentially. Oh, my God. That's a morbid take. I've done it! Wow, we

ended with a dead dog there. There's no sound and I've got terrible news. Your dog's dead. It's a dead dog, but she did win on the 660 scratching, so highs and lows there. Exactly, yes. Alright, let's bring you in with Shannon. Back out from the cone of silence. I right. All right, let's bring you in with Shannon.

Back out from their cone of silence. I would have to say highlights from the round. I really enjoyed both of them scratching their 660 Instant Kiwi. Yeah, me too. I also enjoyed the car. The car failing to start. They both took a different turn there, but both those dreaded noises in the morning.

But today's winner, by about seven seconds, congratulations to Shannon. Yay! Yay! Congratulations, Shannon. Winner today of Audio Ninja Warrior. Well done. Oh, thank you. Didn't even have to break a sweat.

No. Not like that dog in Methan. That's it. Yes. Flesh that dog in Methan. That's it. Yes. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. I recently purchased a new car. I bought it off a friend.

Oh, don't do that. Why? Because then if something goes wrong, you can't be angry at your friend. No, look, no, I know what I bought. Well, I didn't know one thing about it, and that is that it is haunted. Okay.

So that's something I want to know from a friend. I knew the Ks on the clock. I knew the work it had done. Yeah. I knew the quality of the speakers. I did not know it had a ghost inside it. Because it's a little, like, cute. Is it a Mazda?

Mazda 3. A little sporty Mazda 3. And I did notice in the car park that you've got roof racks. I do have roof racks. Do you have a stand-up paddleboard? I don't have a stand-up paddleboard, but I'm just keen to store things. If you ever need to. Well, I'm moving on Friday, and we're moving into quite a small little house,

so I sort of figure I might be able to put some storage things on the roof and just drive around with it. Yes. Get a pallet, like one of those wooden pallets. Yeah, and just put some of my old school books up there. Yeah, and just strap it down. We're short on space. Bolt a surfboard to it.

So you're just like a cool dude. Yeah. That means every time you go through the drive-thru, you've got to check that you're not over height. Yeah. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for space, to be honest. Okay, right. Anyway, so I noticed when I would get into the car,

which has Bluetooth, right, and it hooks up to your phone. I noticed when I would get into the car, which has Bluetooth, right, and it hooks up to your phone. I noticed when I would get into the car that I wouldn't, if I didn't connect to the radio and I just wanted some silence, it would instead play me the sound of silence. Hello, darkness, my old friend. Okay. So I would get in and this would just start playing and I'd go, oh, that's so weird.

So you're not plugging your phone in. No, no, no. It's just taking this upon itself. Right? So we just started doing this and I'd go, oh that's weird. Don't mind the song. We'll let it play. And then it would just loop. So this song would play and play and play. Then I, the only way to turn it off, so I'd hit pause

on the little screen. Yeah. And then it would just start again. Yep. And it would just loop and loop and loop. So I had to turn the radio off. Where's it coming from? The ghost. The ghost of Simon and Garfunkel. And then, so the other day,

I was driving out west to go to Spotlight. It's a bit of a drive for me. The whole time it was silent. Okay. About 15 minutes into the drive, it played. Just all of a sudden started. It just started. I went far out.

Okay. See the bejesus out of me. Yep. Hello Duck was my old friend. I thought, I'll let it play. It obviously wants to play. I'll let it play. Yep. Then yesterday I pulled into a car park and I turned the car off. Okay. It has an off button and I turned it off and I got out of the car and a friend walked past this car park

and I said, Alice, hi. Gave her a hug. And then suddenly I heard... Hello, darkness, my old friend. Screaming from my car. The car was off. It was off. It was off.

And it just started playing. But were the keys in the ignition? No, it doesn't have an ignition. It's one of those pushy... Oh, right. But you press stop. It was off. And I saw my friend Alice and I went, oh, get out.

And I say hi to her. And then I heard it. Yeah, those cars, when you get out, the opening the doors, the bit that's like the car's like, oh, we're done here. We're done here. We're done here. I got out. And then it was really loud.

And as I was talking to her, I went, what is that noise? And I looked at my car and I thought, she's back. The ghost is back. And she doesn't like me having a new friend. She doesn't have any friends like us. She wants to be my friend. I know. So now I feel, I don't know.

I don't know whether I just make friends with her, whether I just play the song and just let it happen. This is where Vaughan Smith's white sage business would be absolutely booming because I could convince you to spend $40 on a bunch of otherwise dry sticks. Yeah, like financially worthless dry sticks. Yeah. Like financially worthless dry sticks and you'd light it and then it wouldn't stop it but at least the ghost would be calm.

You can come down to the garage after the show and have a go because... Is the song saved on your phone? No. I don't use Apple Music or anything like that. I've got an iPhone. Is it in a USB hidden somewhere weird? There's a USB connection, but I can see it and you can plug your phone into it.

No, but is there a secondary one in the centre console that has got a USB stick in it? My friend who I bought this car off has just put an MP3 player with only one song on it just to mess with my mind. You think it's a ghost. Mine at least makes sense. Yeah, that's irrational.

Something's wired in somewhere. I feel like if you're going to haunt someone, though, the song Sound of Silence. I know. It's a great song, but it's a haunting song. It's a haunting song. But then again, when you've heard it over and over again. Oh, I know every harmony.

I know every line now. The bottom part's really good. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul. Refund your date. It's been a crazy enough year already without having to go on dates, pay for them, and them not be great. So we thought of this idea, Refund Your Date, where you ring us up. Well, we ask you online, you register.

You say, this is my date, this is how much it costs, and it was terrible. We don't know anything about that. Organise behind the scenes who we'll be talking to, and then we learn your story on air and decide whether or not to reimburse you for that date. Yes, and joining us this morning, good morning, Keegan. How's it going? Good, good.

Jesus, that's a baritone, isn't it? Very deep voice. Yeah, a little bit, a little bit. Calling from the West Coast, something in the water, voice. Yeah, a little bit, a little bit. Calling from the West Coast, something in the water maybe. Yeah, I think so. Greenstone. Sure.

Keegan, tell us about this date. Start from the start. How did you meet? All right, so we met in town in Queenstown. And so we were just like talking, dancing, righty-righty-right. Everything was going all right. Yep.

And she was asking me if I wanted to go to this festival with her the next day, the Dragon Festival in Queenstown. Sorry, I'm super nervous right now. No, don't! Don't be nervous. You're calming us with that voice, I tell you what.

I'll calm you with mine. Keep going. So she invited me to this concert and I said maybe. She's like, voice, I tell you what. I'll calm you with mine. Keep going. Yeah, so she invited me to this concert and right here, I said maybe. She's like, oh, I'd really like to see you again. I'd really like to see you again. I was like, oh, all right, maybe. So the night continued and she kept bringing it up. I was like, I really didn't want to go.

I just wanted to do my washing the next day, clean my room, you know. Yeah, I feel you. I love a washing day. Love a washing day. Dedicated to cleaning. Need a day. You're dedicated to life admin sometimes, don't you? Yeah, definitely.

So I rung mum. I was like, what do you reckon I should do? She's like, go to the concert. It'll be fun. I was like, all right. So I bought my second. Righty-o. I'll text her the next day, ask her if she got home all right,

ask her how she was feeling after the night out. Yeah. She's like, oh, good, good. I was like, all right, righto. She's like, I'm heading to the festival now. I was like, yeah, I'm heading to the festival now too, actually. She's like, oh, yes. Like, thank you so much for a quiet weekend. I was like, oh, yep, heading to the festival now too, actually. She's like, oh, yes, like, bloody so much for a quiet weekend.

I was like, oh, yep, sweet as, see you there. And then I got there, I asked her where she was, she didn't tell me. I told her where I was.

I didn't hear from her again. I actually still haven't heard from her again. Oh my gosh. So I went to the festival to see her and then bloody. So she just dragged you all the way to this festival and I hate to think

what you paid to get there. Yeah, oh, it was 150 bucks. It was a sick festival, though. Like, my friends from work were there, so I went and hung out for them. I got to listen to April Sun in Cuba, which is one of my favourite songs.

It's our banger, mate. Can I just say, listening to this, A, you took a time, you were going to take time out of partying to wash your clothes and clean your room. When you wanted advice, you called your mum. That's, yeah, beautiful. You were sweet and nervous.

You're not overly cocky. I reckon if we just opened the phone lines now, there'd be a list a mile long of potential suitors. No way. You're exactly what the modern woman's after in 2021. Oh, yeah, I'm sure. And so still to this day, you have not heard from her? No.

I sent her a wee bit of a sarcastic message afterwards. I was like, oh, really nice to see you at the festival today. I'm really glad you convinced me to go. Good on you. Wow. Hey, well, Keegan, we're going to refund you that concert ticket. $150. Woo!

Awesome. Thank you very much. You still sound like you had a fun time anyway. I feel like you said you had a good time. Yeah. It definitely wasn't a waste of money. Always take the advice of your mother. That's what I've learned from this.

Yeah, definitely. Mum knows best. Mum's always my best. They do, they do. And what did Mum say when you told her that she stood you up? Oh, she laughed, you know. Shit happens. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.

You're all right, mate. It does, it does. You're not wrong. Hey, Keegan, well done. We're going to refund your date $150 all yours Well done Awesome Thank you very much

Yesterday we were having A bruncheon Which is like a luncheon More of a luncheon than a brunch Okay right It's a bruncheon Yep And with a friend

I don't know We got talking about going away As a group. Not us. We're not all planning a weekend away or whatever. But we are very soon embarking on the Bangers Bingo Tour of War, which I just mentioned moments ago. I said at the time I'm throughing for it.

ZM Online, yes, exactly. It was so smooth. You hate leaving your house. Famously. As a fact. Famously, I know. But we talked about going away as a group and I said that,

he was saying that it's kind of, there's a whole lot of dynamics to work in and I said, add kids to the mix, it's a whole lot worse. And then I got talking about

how I now understand why my parents didn't like me having friends over when I was young because they only knew how to discipline one way and it was a smack on the ass.

Or a kick up the ass. Yeah, kick up the ass. Whack with a rolled up newspaper. Or a wooden spoon or the gland rat roll. Yeah. And I said, I understand that now. Not that I smack my kids or I want to smack other kids, but it's hard to discipline other people's kids.

Is it even hard to tell them off though? You can't really, can you? You can't say, get out of there. Well, not like you would your own kids. You know your own kids, you, can you? You can't say, get out of there. Well, not like you would your own kids. You know your own kids, you shoot them the look, you're like, get out of there now. And they know what that means. But you can't really do that to other people's kids as much.

And that's when Hayley told us this little chestnut. Look, the 90s was a different time. I'm going to start by saying that. The 90s was a different time. I'm going to start by saying that. The 90s was a different time. That's your disclaimer. Yeah. Yep. So I was disciplined by someone else's mother in the 90s.

And I went to this birthday party. And I don't know if you guys did this, but we used to tie Barbie dolls or toys on strings and you'd bungee them off a balcony. Yep. Very familiar with it. We used to climb on the roof to do it. Actually. Yeah, yeah. Bungee like G.O. Joes and stuff off. You just like throw them off a balcony. Yeah, very familiar with it. We used to climb on the roof to do it. Actually.

Yeah, yeah. Bungee like G.O. Joe's and stuff off. You just like throw them down and go, woo. And we were doing this at this birthday party. This feels so terrible to say. We were doing this at this birthday party and I dropped my Barbie doll. I dropped the string.

And it fell down and it hit a cat. And then the cat jumped onto the friend's sister and clawed her. And she bled and she cried. Right? So this is what happened. This is what I'm talking about. How do you deal with that?

So the mother was downstairs dealing with the daughter who's bleeding and crying because of this cat that got afraid. And we came down, and I think I didn't come down to be like, oh, I'm sorry. Because it's not my fault. I just dropped this thing. It's the cat's fault.

Yeah, it's the cat's fault. So we came downstairs and the mother walked in with the sister and said, look what you've done. And then gave me a little smack.

What? My dad loved a smack. But he never smacked. He didn't, my dad was the dad that I'd be like, oh yeah, my dad can be really mean. And then people would come around and my dad would a smack, but he never smacked. My dad was the dad that I'd be like, oh, yeah, my dad can be really mean. And then people would come around and my dad would turn on the charm. And they'd be like, you're full of shit.

Your dad's awesome. I'd be like, no! I know. I got a little smack. Oh, my God. You got a smack. Anyway, I just remember being like, okay, I'm in trouble. And maybe I was upset.

And I never told my parents until maybe, honestly, a few years ago. And I was like, remember when so-and-so's mum smacked me at that party? And she was like, I beg your pardon. So had Patsy at the time known that her child had been smacked? She would have been knocking on that door, going around there. Maybe would have given the mother a smack. Who do you think you are? Yeah.

Wow. Crazy, huh? Get a little smack? Wow. Do you ever get disciplined by anybody else's parents? No? Yeah. Wow. Crazy, huh? Get a little smack. Wow. Do you ever get disciplined by anybody else's jokes? Nah, not by anyone else's. Shitbag. Not even a little telling off.

Or maybe a telling off. Yeah. But yeah, not a hiding or a smack. We were at Stephen G's place breaking light bulbs. Stephen G's house. Sounds like a Chris Lilley character. Stephen G's house. He's a real life person.

Breaking light bulbs. Like in his pockets. And his mum was like, yeah. His mum was like, don't do that. Like, can you believe that? Look at that. We just did it once. And we were like, whoa.

How did they make a prop? I drop a toy and I get a smack. You get a smack. We just got, don't do that. Oh. Don't do that. But when you left with Stephen G, you've got a hymen? I don't know.

Probably. I don't know. Probably. I don't know. What year was this? This was like 89. Yeah, he would have got a bloody smack. Surely. Someone had to get a smack. We brought light bulbs in my house.

It would have been big trouble. You would have been working off the cost of those light bulbs too. I would have been put in isolation. Yeah. It would have been absolutely. So we wanted to know this morning if you've ever been disciplined by somebody else if you were around at somebody's house.

At his birth? I didn't know this. Was it a birthday party yesterday? What a way to bring down the mood of the party. Yeah, we were surrounded by other children. And you got smacked. I got shamed. Wow.

For shame, I got smacked in front of everyone. So when were you told off or disciplined by somebody else's parent? Not your own. Maybe you were at your best friend's house or your friend's house and like the parents laid it to you. Not obviously like a hiding or anything. You keep those ones a secret for 20 years like I did. You never forget it though, eh?

No. Like being told off by anybody as a kid. I remember what the house looked like. I'm not traumatised. Yeah, those days were though, eh? No. Like being told off by anybody as a kid. I remember what the house looked like. I'm not traumatised. You had those days of wild, eh? It was just a wild time. You did that now. Holy moly.

Yeah, ridiculous. All right, so 0800-DARLS-NM, you can give us a call, 9696. When were you disciplined by somebody else's parents? All right, and what happened? What was the story behind it? Give us a call. ZM, Pleatspawn and Megan with somebody else's parents. All right. And what happened? What was the story behind it? Give us a call. ZM, Pleach, Fawn and Megan with Hayley Sproul. We're talking about those times when you were disciplined,

told off by your friend's parents, not your own parents. No. Because, you know, it's a bit of a thing you can't really tell off someone else's kids, can you? Well, you certainly can't. You certainly can't tell them off physically either, as I was. This was started because Hayley revealed to us yesterday at brunch that another friend's parent smacked you.

Gave me a smack when I frightened their cat, and then the cat clawed the daughter. And you got smacked. And you hid this from your mum. You didn't tell your mum that she smacked you. I don't know if I actively hid it. I can't really remember, but I never told my mum until honestly a couple of years ago in my late twenties.

And she was like, oh my God, if I had have known. And then just now my mum's listening, as she does every morning. She's very proud. Of me. She said, I would have, I would have smacked that bitch, all right? Oh my God.

Wow. Your mum threw down with another mum. Excuse my language, but I needed to say the word for impact. Yeah. Wow. Wow. There you go. But then we've learned that your dad's also dished out a smack or two

in his time to other people's kids. She said, by the way, dad gave Hayden a smack at a barbecue because he had kicked him out of the blue. I was horrified. Same barbecue his sister took a shit on the conservatory floor. They were feral. What a barbecue! What a barbecue!

Oh, I can't breathe! Wow. One kid's kicking the adults for absolutely no reason. While the other, probably distracting it so his sister can take a dump on the floor and they can sit with you. So there you go. I was smacked by someone's mum,

but my dad gave someone else's kid a scissor. Yeah, as good as he got it. Leslie, you were told off by somebody's parent? Somebody else's parent? I was given a jandal. Oh! On a bare leg? Or where did you get the jandal?

Oh, just around the bum. Yeah, it was by my parents' friends that we were staying with for the night. They were like auntie and uncle to us. We were just walking up to the shop and me and a couple of the other kids just took off ahead and were crossing the roads where we weren't supposed to. When auntie caught up to us, we all got a little bit of a smack around the bum with the jandals years later actually um at a party i said to her passing you know just joking you know you sent me around the bum when when i was a kid with janus like

did i i'm like yes you did and we all had a good laugh about it that's the thing it just would have been in the spirit of the moment you've got to learn you've got to learn and you're going to learn, and you've got to learn. I love that. You're under the bridge now, isn't it? Do you jaywalk now as an adult, Leslie? Oh, I try not to, but you know. You see?

Look at that. You see? You've been scared to, scared the bejesus out of you with a jandal. Thanks for your call. Some text messages. Somebody said, when I was young, I was at a friend's place

and the mum heard me say a swear word. As I recall, it wasn't even a swear word Maybe blasphemy at most Oh right okay Light Light Jesus A bit of a light Jesus light

And she made me bite Into a bar of soap And then she dragged the soap out While my teeth were still closed So I had teeth Soap caked on the back of my teeth That is ruthless That's terrible

That's terrible. That's so, just as I said that, I can remember the taste of soap, that yellow soap that was always in the laundry. Yes. And a bar. Palm olive? Nah. Sunlight.

Sunlight? Yeah, it was. Yeah. Yeah, I had that in my mouth a few times. Driving home with my friend and her mum, I accidentally burped out loud. She pulled over the car and berated at me, berated me yelling and made me walk the rest of the way home. I was 10 years old.

Just for a burp? I was crying and walking and she eventually turned around and followed me in the car but wouldn't let me in, just drove beside me and gave me a lecture on why burping is so rude. Wow. I got told off by my best friend's mum for not wanting to watch The Grudge

and getting really upset by it. We were 10 and she wanted, my friend wanted to watch it and the mum berated me for ruining her get-together by not wanting to watch the movie she watched. 10? You shouldn't be watching The Grudge if you're 10. No. You shouldn't be watching that at all.

That's The Grudge, eh? Yeah, that noise. she watched. Ten? You shouldn't be watching the grudge if you're ten. No. Oh, no. That's the grudge, eh? Yeah, yeah, that noise. When I was four, I used to bite and I bit a kid for riding my trike. His mother bit me back. Bit me so hard it bled. Apparently, I never again bit another person. But now

as a parent, I can't fathom biting a four year old that's so small four four yeah there were four when they got bitten by the

bit it so hard that it bled that it bled that's the thing I can't imagine kids are so tiny they are like whacking

or biting it's just mind blowing I was yelled at across the room when I was 10 for eating my friend's parents' Milo. I was raised in a house where we were very healthy and never had Milo, so it was like crack for me.

Once I got a taste of it when I was staying at their house, I woke up early and snuck into their kitchen and just started eating it by the spoon load and got absolutely torn to shreds by my friend's parents for doing it. I was at my best friend's place. Her mum grounded me. She smacked me

on more than one occasion. What? And I was as scared of her as I was of my own mother. How do you enforce a grounding when you don't even live with that person? I don't know. While you're here, you're not going outside? I don't know. Grounded you? Yeah. The audacity.

Someone said, we got a smack. I got smacked by my parents, my friend's parents. We're at their house. We stole a big bot. So like a Swap-a-Crepe bottle. And then spilt it on her parents' carpet and then tried to clean it and ended up blowing up a hair dryer trying to blow it out, dry it out.

So I got a smack. I'm assuming these people are all of a certain age that smacking was A-OK a few years ago. I've talked to my parents about it now. Many, many years ago. And they said they just, they grew up being smacked. No one told them not to. Yeah. There wasn't, my mum said there wasn't Nigel Latte on TV when you were a kid.

To tell us that it wasn't good. My mum used to do the old sort of firm grip around the wrist if I was being a brat in public. Not so much of a smack, but sort of like, I'm going to hold your hand. I'll just give you a little squeeze to let you know. You need to calm down. Who's in charge here?

Times have changed. Flesh, Vaugh let you know. You need to calm down. Who's in charge here? Yeah. Times have changed. Fletchvorna Megan, the podcast, ZM. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is about smorgasbords buffets. Oh, yum. Yum. In Japan. Okay.

Know anything about buffets in Japan? No, but I feel like you're about to shock us. Look at that smug look on your face like you know something we don't. In Japan, buffets are not called buffets, nor are they called smorgasbords. They're called Vikings. Beg your pardon? You go for a Japanese Viking. A lunch Viking or a dinner Viking would mean

you would be about to embark on a disgusting amount of gluttony. Is that because you would do that before you got in your big boat and rode to another country? No. And hence you have a car loading, basically? Pillage country? No. And hence you were carb loading, basically? Pillage them. No. It's because until like the 1950s,

until like after World War II, when Japan started to recover, prior to that hadn't had heaps of natural resources. The food was pretty simple. Fish, rice, a lot of, you know. A lot of bento boxes. Tons of bento boxes. Is that what you're saying?

But not pancake crumbed. So it wasn't until after that, A lot of, you know. A lot of bento boxes. Tons of bento boxes. Is that what you're saying? But not pancake-combed. Okay. So it wasn't until after that that they kind of could get into a buffet. A buffet-style eating as the economy recovered. Now, it was in 1957 that the restaurant manager from the Imperial Hotel in Tokyo traveled to Sweden. And that is where he had his first smorgasbord. Now, he loved this

and he was like, you know who's going to love this? Everyone back home. Yep. So, back home we went. He had it written down, smorgasbord, but he could not find anybody who could say it with ease. Okay. In Japan. Smorgasbord, not an easy word to say. And you're kind of adding a C-H in there.

Smorgasbord. Smorgasbord. Smorgasbord. I got Smorgasbord because I'm imagining the Swedish chef from The Muppets saying it. Right. Smorgasbord. Smorgasbord.

Smorgasbord. Smorgasbord. Is that where the Smorgasbord originates from? That's the name. Sweden. Yeah. Okay.

Scandinavian Smorgasbord. It's got an umlut over the O. Oh, it does. And a little circle over the A. Circle over the A. I don't know what you call a circle over a letter. I think it could be quite right.

Smugg, smorg. Okay. So no one could say it and it wasn't catchy. So he was like, well, what I'll do is Vikings is a fun word to say. And people in Japanese can say Vikings. Yeah. There's pretty much a Viking, there's a direct translation into Japanese

for Viking. So we should just call them Vikings because that's, this is how the Vikings would have eaten also, just a lot because they were big lads with horn hats and beards. So it was just, picked a word out of the sky basically. Yeah, from where it came,

from where they had first seen the smorgasbord. Wow. And they said Vikings, that's what people known as. So if you're going to have a Viking in Japan, you're about to sit down and have a smorgasbord. Ah! That's what it is. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sparrow It's 18 minutes away from 9 It's also 18 minutes away from my tickets expiring It's not, I've got 4 days So you've got some tickets Yeah, I'm moving house on Friday.

I don't know if I mentioned that enough. And I've been cleaning out my stuff drawer. You know, everyone's got a stuff drawer. And I found six movie ticket vouchers that were gifted to me, I guess it must be about a year ago. Oh, where did you get those movie tickets from? Oh, they were gifted to me by our employer at Have You Been Paying Attention. Weird.

I didn't get any movie tickets. Wow, because I've got four normal ones and two gold class tickets. Wow, okay. So six, and that's just for anybody keeping a score. You got six and I got none. Yeah, I got six. So next time someone mentions the gender pay gap...

Yeah, fair call. There's a movie, there's a clear movie ticket pay gap A huge disparity An undeniable disparity You guys are about to film the next season of Have You Been Paying Attention Oh, I'm not going Oh, wow Until I get six movie tickets

Well, the thing is, look I didn't even get to enjoy them because the expiry date is the end of January. Now, that is four days away. I'm not going to go today, am I? Because you're moving. Well, I'm moving

all day up until. I'm moving on Friday, so I can't go Friday. So I've basically got tomorrow and then I'm busy all weekend and then they expire.

So what I'm trying to do is maybe tomorrow I guess I'll try to see six movies, two of which will be in the Gold Class. Yeah, okay. Are you going to go by yourself?

Gold Class picks a movie and then just shows it over and over all day. Yeah. I'm not going to share them. They were gifted to me for my hard work. Okay. I'm not sharing them. Yeah. So, yeah, I'm going to try and get to see six movies.

I guess I could go tonight. I don't know. But it's a bit stressful. Yeah, the trouble are there aren't a lot of movies on at the moment because America, you know, they're saving a lot of their movies until the end of the pandemic, whenever that is. I might have to look for something

sort of arthouse-y, maybe a Rialto or something. Monster Hunter's on. Okay, I'll see that. That looks rad. I'll go see Dawn Raid. I'll go see Promising Young Woman. I'm hearing fantastic things about. So there you go. There's three taken up.

It's more of a time constraint. Like how can I cram this in? Can't be a late night. Would you feel bad about going to say a first session at 10 and then going to like the midday screening and then going to like

a 2pm and then a 5? Have you never done that? No. Have you never spent the day going to the movies? Not since I was a teenager. We used to do this in Wellington because at the

Wellington cinemas, Reading cinemas, they had the person at the front of all the cinemas and you gave your ticket to them and then we would

just stay in. So we're just cinema hop. Right, because you had paid for the other tickets, hadn't you? I paid for one. It's not an

all-you-can-eat system. It's a buffet. It's a movie buffet. Once you pass the gatekeeper, they're a bit more arid than a buffet. It's a movie buffet. It's a gatekeeper. They're a bit more arid than us now. It's a movie viking. It is a movie viking. In Japan they do, yeah.

You're going to movie viking. It's just stressful. I hate letting things go to waste. I hate, you know, someone thought so kindly to gift this to me and me alone, it seems. Have you noticed that because there was a big uproar, there's been an uproar over the last year on gift vouchers, because I got a few at Christmas.

Have you noticed the expiry date for gift cards has blown out like two years now or something? Oh, really? It's really good now. Because everyone was complaining that they'd get six months or 12 months. Yeah, well, sometimes, especially with Boxing Day or pre-Christmas, it's like end of Jan is your return date. Yeah.

I'm still on holiday. Yeah, I think people have become a lot more accepting with expired. Like little businesses are. Shall I try it? Shall I go to five movies and then maybe on the first on Monday?

Go in. I don't even reckon they'll even see the date to be honest. Yeah. They'll just be stoked to see you. Yeah, probably.

I'll give you my review of the movies. I feel like by the fourth one I might be asleep. Make the fourth one gold I might be asleep. Make the fourth one gold class. Great reclining chair. Use that voucher, because then if you do fall asleep.

Get a couple of shampers. Yeah, and get them to bring me a couple of shampers. Yeah. That's not included in the voucher. Isn't it? No. Take your own shampers. Could I use the second gold class voucher for food and the first one for the seat?

That's not how it works. You can't but ask. They'd probably just be So someone gifted me something and I still have to pay for it to be an enjoyable experience. Ha ha. Glad I didn't get the gift.

Well good. I was going to invite you guys to come with me but now I wasn't. I'm going to see six movies by myself. Fleshforn and Megan

The Podcast ZM Why does that end so abruptly? That's certainly not how LAB intended that song to end. Wait, what just happened? It finished mid-sentence.

I think it just finished mid-bit. There you go. God, it's that bloody... Really surprised me. It's that Matt Romney song all over again. That lulled me into a false sense of I was just getting a little like nunnies. Like I was relaxing in the summer sun. I was hammocking.

I was hammocking. I was in a hammock too. And all of a sudden it's like I got flipped out of the hammock. God, that took them two months to fix that song last time. Well, after this is doing telling, I can imagine this will be fixed ASAP. Rocky. All right, five minutes away from nine. It blew your guys' mind.

I was just telling you before that my daughter's favourite TV show is Paramedics. Now this is on TVNZ1 at 7.30 on Tuesdays. Now, these are Australian. It's a reality show following, yeah, the Melbourne Paramedics. The Melbourne Paramedics. God, they do a great job, Paramedics. It's high drama, isn't it?

So my friend's a paramedic and he moved over to do his, you know, working holiday. Moved to London. Oh. Just in time for a global pandemic. And he just said they're just like basically giving people

giving old people the right to the hospital to die my friend that's over there doing that she said they don't even

just leave them in their house now yeah because they're like well we can't help you if they're over a certain age they just kind of like leave them in the house

try to make them as comfortable as they possibly can and give their family things to help make them comfortable I mean shocking terrible but there is an upside they get the NOS don't they the house. They try to make them as comfortable as they possibly can and give their family things to help make them comfortable. I mean, shocking.

Terrible. But there is an upside. They get the nice, don't they? Lunchtime huff. Yeah. A little lunchtime nang. A bit of a giggle

on the way out. So as long as you're not driving. If you're that one in the back. Oh, knock yourself out. Well, don't.

That's problematic. Where are you driving anyway? Yeah. In the UK at the moment. Oh, they're not going anywhere. So Paramedics is my daughter's favourite show.

I think my mum got them onto it because mum loves an Australian emergency response show. She'd watch anything. Police. There's never been a fire one because I suppose you get in the way. They're in a real hustle bustle. Yeah. But they got into Paramedics. So it's one of those TV shows where, oh, it's Paramedics tonight.

They'll say, it's Tuesday on the clock on the wall. It's got Tuesday. They're like, Tuesday's paramedics night. I'm like, well, if you want to watch paramedics, you better eat all your dinner. If you want to watch paramedics, you've got to be showered in your pyjamas by 7.30. Frantically washing. Brush your teeth or you won't be able to watch paramedics. I wish paramedics was on every night.

Wow. Because it sounds like it really makes them get ready. They love it. Okay. And then they've got heaps of questions throughout it, most of which I'm absolutely incapable of answering, but I can Google and get, like, what that word means. Yeah, right.

Like intubation. Yeah, yeah. Perhaps they're getting inspired for a future career. You would find that, would you? Free NOS. Wow, okay, Dad's on board. That's Christmas sort of A bock

A big bock Gas Gas Canister of NOS Yeah right So I know I'm a chef I just make lots of whipped cream stuff So last night

And I've noticed this on this show before They don't censor the swear words I don't know if this is an oversight at TVNZ, if it just arrives digitally and it just gets chucked in and they're like, 20 minutes in, ad break. 20 minutes later, ad break. And no one's checking, but this show is riddled with uncensored swear words. What kind of swear words are you talking about? Here it is last night, if you start playing this in the background. Wait, wait, have you censored it? I would have censored it. Wait, so we're censoring it. But they didn't censor it. This was also at like 10 past 8 last night.

I'm going to a Code One job. So this is a potential wife-adjusted situation. This guy's wife's pregnant. Okay. So he's waiting here for his wife. I get a text message and the first few words read, don't panic, but that she might be in early labour. Oh, f***.

What? The stage has got a bit more interesting. Like a big F-bomb. And that wasn't censored. Not censored. And you heard him. He's like, ah. Like, he really hit the F.

He really followed through. The K was strong. But in that circumstance, there's not really any other word you can say, is there? Shivers. Oh, heck. Oh, we're heading to an emergency and she's going to do early labour. Yeah. Shiver me timbers.

Arr, shiver me timbers. So blimey. But it wasn't censored. I don't blame him for saying it. He's doing his job. And then the next sentence was another F-bomb. Then they followed it up with another F-bomb. My children were just recovering from the shock of that.

They heard worse. But they, like, not on television. And it was that hard when they were like, I've heard worse. And they looked around. They've heard worse. You're just chucking around. Yeah, shiver me timbers.

They just heard you say it. Chucking around the seas, left, right and centre at home. No, no. Did they hear that or did they explain to them? I think I went through the hierarchy of swear words. Yeah. Because on swear words, August, my youngest, over summer she had a bad graze up her leg

and we were putting plasters on it, but we needed to change it every day. And I came up with what I thought was a genius parenting hack and anybody else can feel free to use this. I let her, because taking off a plaster is horrible when you're a kid. Got to do it fast. That's why they say whip it off like a band-aid. Yeah.

I let her say one swear word every time we've ripped off the plaster. So day one, she's like, okay, interesting. I'm looking forward to this. I was like, you're not going to be in trouble. And so it takes her mind off the fact this is going to hurt. Yeah. So she gets to say a swear word and she doesn't get in trouble for it. So she's amped.

Day one, I go one, two, three, and she's like, shit. And she just looked around like, oh, that was good. She's like, I better have another plaster. She's getting hopped up. Yeah, next day. She's like, does the same rule apply? Do I get to swear? One swear word.

One swear word. And so I'm ready, set, and I rip it. And she's like, F, that hurt. Said, oh, loved it. Hit it like a pro. And I was just like, oh. And next day she's like, I've got a good one lined up today. Are you terrified at this point?

I'm scared. It's elevated quickly from shit to the air. I'm thinking we're going straight C-bomb at least. No, she just kept using the F word. Oh, good. She reached her glass ceiling at the F word. And then she kept going, C-bomb at least. No, she just kept using the F word. Oh, good. She reached her glass ceiling at the F word. And then she kept going, oh, it needs another plaster. I'm like, no, no, we've got to the point now where it needs to dry out.

It needs to air. You can tell she really felt like she'd lost the reins of power there by not being able to rip the F-bomb. Absolutely, you know, without knowing there was going to be no punishment following. And now this guy on paramedics said it again. She's probably going to go out today and hurt herself just to get another plaster.