ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 27th September 2021

Episode Date: September 26, 2021

How to be more Memorable  Most Stolen Cars BOP  Top 6: Other names for Men  Food Deal Breakers  Producer Jared's Super Cool Purchase!  Where's my Medal!?  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Clay. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. Thanks to McCafe, barista made coffee available from drive-thru and McDelivery at level 3 and also dine-in at level 2. We've just received a lovely package. I'm trying to find out what TH stands for.

Emma, TH. Who lives in Bulls? Bulls? Postcode 4818? Oh no, that's what you call the police there, a Bullstable. I like a Constable. A Constable. A Constable, that's what they say.

A Bullstable. I haven't driven through there for ages, but all the shops and stuff have different things. Yeah. Like Supermarketable. I don't know what that supermarket one's called. Edible. Edible. Yeah, like that. It's Bulls.

I don't know if I've ever been there. McDonald's. It's got a Bulls. Bulls has got a McDonald's. McDonald's has a Bulls outlet. But Bulls looks so small. It's a small town. It's a thriftier. It's got a hockey right like, right next door. Yeah, right on the doorstep.

Sanson, just up the road. Yep. But I tell you what, I was looking at some real estate there in Bulls. Oh, yeah? And tell you what, you can pick up an absolute bargain. Yeah, right, okay. An absolute bargain. But that's where you're thinking of moving to Bulls, then?

Oh, I could go. Bulls Domain's massive. Looks like a beautiful, massive. A Bulls what domain? The domain, like the park. Lovely. Yeah, it's got three tennis courts. They all look like they're made of that asphalt stuff that it was made of in like the 90s

before that flash greens, where if you fell over on it, it would just absolutely tear you to shreds. It's got some of that. It's got an RSA. So, I mean, Bull's has got a Bull's Liquor Center. Yeah, right. Shit, that'd be mixable. Yep, yep. But Emma has sent us this lovely package of goodies.

No, like, contact details. Falling short of the address. Okay. Definitely just want to make just a few treats and say thank you for all the yarns. You guys are awesome. Take care, Emma. That's a thank you card. And it's pretty much everything. She's sent us treats, everything that we like and mention.

Remember I mentioned those squiggles, the raspberry jib squiggles? Yeah. There's a small sort of like 11 pack. No, that's a large. No, it's all little packs inside. It's 11. That's good. Weird also that they put an 11 pack in.

Yeah, make it 12 or 10. Yeah. Is 11 a prime number? It's treat size so you don't get too low of a bag. It's not like you could have three kids and they could have or 10. Yeah. Is 11 a prime number? It's treat size so you don't get too much bag. It's not like you could have three kids and they could have four each. Yeah. That would be 12. Porridge.

Uncle Toby's rolled oats. She knows you have porridge every morning. I have porridge every morning. Dinosaurs. Don't chop the dinosaur, Daddy. Natural dinosaurs. Kinder happy hippos and a block of caramel. You will hear us on today's podcast talk about

lockdown traits and fatness. So thank you for that. Thank you for adding to that. Lovely gesture. Thank you. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show. Fletch Vaughan and Megan, happy Monday morning.

Megan just showing some concern there for Warriors player caught at the weekend with cocaine, Rhys Walsh. He's a very attractive young man. I heard you described him as a boofhead. Did I say boofhead? Before you did. I don't have a lot of time for boofheads is what you said. No, I said I'm not hugely attracted to boofheads. And then you asked if I was vaccinated. I thought that was a pretty good line of questioning

to go down. Well, I'm just concerned that people who like to do illicit substances but then refuse the vaccine. Oh, because they don't know what's in it. Yeah. That seems very hypocritical. Yeah. That was my line of questioning.

I always remember someone when, you know, the sports players muck up, the league players, the union players. To a lesser extent. The lawn bowlers? Yeah, not really. To a lesser extent, the cricketers. Somebody said, you imagine giving your first 15 a million bucks. Imagine putting everybody in your first 15 a million bucks? Imagine putting

everybody in your first 15 on a million dollar contract and seeing what they'd do. Yeah. These dudes have been like sports stars since school. Or just imagine giving your 19 year old self a million dollars. And social media.

Neither. Either could have been very, very dangerous. Yes. Not a great idea. I mean, it's not an excuse, but maybe it kind of gets into the headspace of dumb decisions. I would have been able to buy some quality dark rum, like a bottle of Karuba. Not that Mad Jack's $10 stuff I used to buy when I was 19. Partay.

Those were the days. Partay. when I was 19. Party. Those were the days. Party. If I'd had a million dollars, we wouldn't have had to have had the flat policy and regular meal, potatoes, potatoes, potatoes, where we just had three different types of potatoes. Like mashed on top of fried. Mashed. And scalloped.

Boiled. Yep. And scalloped was posh. Yeah, because you need cheese. You need a lot of cheese. And that was all used in Callum's Tuesday Night Pasta Bake, which was the other every week flat meal. Yeah, the third potatoes was up for debate.

You could fry them, though. Yeah, right. Coming up on the show, the top six, as usual. Yeah, the top six will be the top six ways to describe men in medical journals after women were described as bodies with vaginas. A little bit of controversy there. It's not wrong, though. You know, the bodies with the vaginas.

You're meant to be outraged. No, but I understand it's trying to be more inclusive. So I'm not outraged. I mean, I am a body with a vagina. If you want to break it down., I am a body with a vagina. If you want to break it down. You are indeed a body with a vagina. So I've got the top six ways to describe men in the same medical journal.

Yeah, right. Okay. Alright, five past six. And so we head into summer and hopefully maybe out of some sort of lockdown you're going to be seeing more people. So next I'll tell you how to be more memorable to people you meet. Are we? I mean, I'm trying to be positive. We hope.

Hopefully we'll get to socialise again. Sometime. I mean, lots of people found a way in the weekend, though, didn't they? To socialise. I mean, there probably shouldn't have been. I could not believe how many cars were on, like, the motorway and the streets. It was nuts. Naughty.

Very naughty. Very naughty. Very naughty. Yeah. Well, if we do get to socialise again, a memory expert, this is a US memory champion. His name is Chester and he has given us tools to be the memorable person at the party.

How to be more memorable to people you meet. So, you know when you meet someone and you're like, oh, we've met before and they're like, oh, have we? You're like, wow. That's like me all the time. I'm not, I can remember faces. Like I'll always be like, I've met that person somewhere,

but I've no idea what their name is. We've met before, yeah. Is that rude to say that? We've met before, right? No, I like to do things like, hey, Vaughn, ask that person their name. But then I could look like the bad guy because what if I've met them too?

The last time you met them, I met them. And I'm like, hey, what's your name? We've met before. I'll be like, that doesn't work, does it? No.

We're okay with you being the bad guy. So here's some tips apparently on how to make yourself more memorable at a party. Take your pants off. Yes. Walk into a party with no pants. I mean, sure.

Because the next time they see you, they're like, pants down, guys. Pants down, yeah. And people will go home and be like, oh, my God, this party I was at last night, this guy walked in with like a box of long white raspberries and no pants. And they remember you. Maybe for the wrong reasons. I reckon just the box of long white raspberries would no pants and they remember you. Maybe for the wrong reasons. For the raspberries.

Just the box of long white raspberries would probably be enough. Not those. A man your age walked in with a box of long white raspberries. Yeah, but they're delicious. Yuck, not the raspberries. No, they're delicious. It's the apple and nectarine. Have you tried the apple and nectarine flavoured Long Island? Oh, my God.

What are they called? I thought that would just taste like lollies. You're damn right it did. Yeah, that's what the raspberry one tastes like, lollies. The first 11 tasted like lollies. I don't remember what the 12th one tasted like. They were yummy. So apparently remembering people back.

So when you go somewhere and they're like, oh, have we met? And you're like, yeah, so-and-so, I remember you. That makes you more memorable. So, like, as soon as someone tells you their name, I always like to say it back in my head. I'm like, okay, so that's Fletch. Yeah, yeah. Fletch.

And then associate it with someone. If you're having trouble remembering his name, you've been working with him for years. Yeah. God, are you okay? I'm Vaughn. It's nice to meet you. I always try and associate it with someone I know,

but I literally don't know how I would associate your name. Fletch. Like, nah. Fletch. That's why I would associate your name. Fletch. Like, nah. Fetch. Sorry, people don't remember me. But apparently, we remember and like those that express a genuine interest in us. So that will make you more memorable.

Be funny. This guy says that you should have some jokes or anecdotes ready. No, because then you're that person that tried to be some jokes or anecdotes ready. I don't know because then you're that person that tried to be funny. Just no. Especially if you have social anxiety or struggle with small talk, which is me. And then, hang on, here's a joke that I've prepared.

Yeah, I don't think that is. Would you like to hear a joke? No. Oh, no. I don't know what else I could do. Or bore them with an anecdote. Oh, I couldn't think of anything worse. Apparently switch up your look is a good one.

So you don't have to wear like something crazy loud, but wear something different because apparently remembering the woman with the flower in her hair is much more identifiable than the woman with brown hair. Yeah, fair call. I mean, that's just an example.

That's actually how I got first caught rubbing my first bank. So I had one of those pretty flowers just here. We're looking for an assailant with a hibiscus behind his ear. A bald head, but a hibiscus behind his ear. No, he was wearing a balaclava. I just poked it in. In through the knitting.

It was also your cable knit balaclava that gave it away. It seemed to be some sort of craft. Maybe he'd made it himself. And the last tip is, especially for you, Vaughn, focus on being in the moment. So focus on the people you're with and what you're doing. Why is this for me? Get off your phone.

You're on your phone worse than me. Whenever we're somewhere, you're just like thinking about going home, putting your feet up and having a whiskey. When can I leave? When can I leave? That sounds great. When am I leaving? When can we leave?

You've still got a few hours to go. Yeah. I don't think so. I think we can work something out. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. Well, a list has been released of the most stolen cars in the last six months in the Bay of Plenty. Oh. Now, I'll give you the top six.

Mazda Atenza. What's that? Like a Mazda... Mazda 6. Is that the big family one? Yeah, it's a family one, but it's still a sedan. That's the sixth most stolen in the last six months. The Mazda Bounty.

The Mazda Bounty? The Mazda Bounty. What's that? It's a chocolate bar, isn't it, with coconut in it? No, that's a Mars Bounty. The Mazda Bounty? The Mazda Bounty. What's that? It's a chocolate bar, isn't it, with coconut in it? No, that's a Mars Bounty. Oh. Mazda Bounty, a ute? Yeah. So do you know that the top five are all...

Oh, that's what the B stands for. And a Mazda B, like a B150 or whatever. Bounty. Yeah. Oh, right. It's like a Ford Courier, but with a Mazda B. Like a B150 or whatever. Bounty. Yeah. Oh, right. It's like a Ford Courier, but with a Mazda badge on it. Four in the top five are utility vehicles. So you tradies out there this morning.

Oh, shit, mate. Lock it up. I've always said lock it up. Don't leave your tools. I've got my Milwaukee stuff in the back. The tools. You let that be stolen, buddy Milwaukee. Got a brand of ear rocker over there, champ.

You're a DeWalt man. I'm a De there, champ. You're a DeWalt man. I'm a DeWalt man. Yeah, I'm a DeWalt man. Don't come at me with your Makita bullshit. So the Mazda Bounty is the fifth most stolen. The Nissan Navara, that's a ute, isn't it? 13 of those have been stolen in the last six months. Named after the 90s band, Navara.

Yep. So they just had their 30th anniversary. Never Mind, Like two days ago Yeah Navarra's Nevermind album The Holden Commodore Third most stolen in the last six months Are you kidding me? No

14 of those And the Ford Courier 26 have been stolen in the last six months Well if you team that up with the Bounty Yep They'll more or less the same thing Just with a different badge on it Yeah pretty much

So that's a lot of those have been nicked. And the Hilux, mate. The Toyota Hilux. Bloody Hilux. 32 of them have been stolen in the Bay of Plenty

in the last six months. 32. Where do you put 32 utes? Like, how do you even get away with that? Sounds like the start of a joke. Where do you put 32 utes? Oh, I thought you were going to say like 32

utes went into a bar. And the bar was called the uterus. No, don't clap for that. If you had a bar and it was for utes, you'd be able not to pull the uterus. You'd be an absolute fool.

And you could, like, say, covers band tonight at the uterus, 7pm. Yeah. Or two for one drink specials, happy hour. Philip and the opium tubes. Yes. Oh, my God. All those people in the highlights ad could come. Yeah.

Now, you wanted the private womb. You wanted the private womb to use tonight, didn't you, for you and your pals? The private womb. If everybody could just identify the fire cervixes. Stop. Down there at the back. It's a great name for a bar. And the tradies would love it after work.

Oh, yeah. And bring the utes in. Fantastic. Yeah. Well, there you go. If you've got. Bring the utes in. Fantastic. Yeah. Well, there you go. If you've got... That fill up with the opium. Yeah.

Oh, shit. There you go. All right, tradies. You could call the tip jar the clitoris because they'd never find it. Oh, we haven't... Are you out now? Are you out? You're done?

I don't know. I think I've squeezed two more out. I feel like I've barely touched the sides. Six of the possibilities of other things at the uterus. 6.23 next on the show. Netflix has made an announcement. Yeah, there's going to be a sequel of a very much beloved TV show. No.

The cocktail part of the bar much beloved TV show. No. The cocktail part of the bar. Yep. It's called the cocktail. No, lad. Yeah, we'll keep going. Muraki. Wavy. It's a scientific term.

ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. So, I mean, it was the start of last year that we all got introduced to the Tiger King on Netflix. That, for me, will always be that first lockdown. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone just absolutely binged it. Yeah, it feels like the entire world watched that. Yeah.

So 64 million households in the first four weeks. Oh, yeah, wow. So, yeah, literally running the world. Everybody did then. Yeah. It has been confirmed that we're getting a season two. A sequel is on its way as part of Netflix's upcoming true crime slate. So apparently there's a lot of new information.

It says in the teaser, we've only just scratched the surface. Oh, God. I mean, when you watched it, you were like, this can't get any worse. Whoa. This can't get any worse. Whoa. Are they going to dig up Carol's septic tank? Yeah.

Oh, my God. Because she'll be like, oh, God, I've just got back to normal life. Because, you know, everyone was like hassling her, weren't they? Yeah. Has she opted in? Or has she opted out? I don't know, actually. I know that they are talking to Joe Exotic.

So there's footage of him in prison. But I don't know because his what is it called? The zoo was sold as well. So I don't know. Well she got that didn't she? She got that initially but it's been sold. Because there was that other guy that came in

what was his name? That's right he was going to build another zoo somewhere in like Florida or something. He was like with Joe and then it all went bad and he was against him and then he was a shady character. See, she slammed plans for the sequel, so I don't imagine she's going to be there. Or not doing any piece to cams anyway. Yeah, right. So November 17 on Netflix. I mean, that could be America, but it'd be around then that we're going to get it.

Yeah, it's normally the day after if it's America. Is it going to be clutching at straws? Yeah, it kind of feels like you're not going to beat the first season, are you? They're milking it. Oh, definitely not. Yeah, flogging the dead horse. Although I definitely want to hear from Joe in prison.

He's so deluded, eh? I thought we'd heard enough from Joe in prison. Haven't we still been getting little bits and pieces from Joe in prison? I could probably do with not watching this. No, we're not watching it. There's so much to watch. There is like so much to watch. People are always like, hey, watch this show.

Add it to the list. Add it to the list. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Megan. This research, well, it's just a press release from Trade Me. Oh, okay, right. But, you know, everybody needs a story to tell. So they've released what people have been searching for on Trade Me. During lockdown.

Auckland is specifically, and now that alert level three means that things can be ordered online. Right. And apparently it's going into summer. Bikes, boats, and barbecues. Are the big ones. Bikes were the top of the list. 51,000 searches in the last seven days.

Yeah, right. Followed by boats. 17,700 searches for boats. That's a big... Yeah. Like a bike you can kind of put in the garage and be like, oh, that's right, I got a bike.

But they're including like dinghies and stuff. Yeah, all sorts of boats. If they just search boat. Yeah, right. That was right up there. And barbecues. Well, it's getting, you know, daylight savings at the weekend.

Correctamundo. It felt a lot warmer. I mean, you barbecue whatever day of the year it is anyway. You don't care, do you? It's raining. Yeah. You put up the umbrella and you can barbecue under that. You won't get wet.

Yeah. Thanks for explaining how umbrellas work. That's absolutely fine. But you seem to think it needs to not be raining. It's daylight savings. Our eyes are stinging. You put up one of those big ones. Not a little one.

Tell me more. Tell me more. Okay, so you know the little umbrellas that you can carry. There's these other umbrellas that are bigger. And you can put them up outside. What? Do you hold it? No, it's got a holder.

It sits in a holder. Oh, my God. Here's where people go wrong. Yeah. These are called sun umbrellas. Right. Not like your ordinary umbrella. Right.

A lot of a parasol situation to protect you from the sun. But they also protect you from the rain. This is fantastic. Forget this. So you can pop that up outside and put the barbecue under it and, you know, say no more. Yeah, nice. You can barbecue any amount of wet. Now, I will mention these big umbrellas don't like the wind.

Oh, so you have to pop them down, do you? Well, or you can somehow anchor them. I now regret asking. You can somehow anchor them to something. Right, okay. Yeah. Or have... That's good stuff. If it's not on the deck, maybe it's on the ground,

you could anchor it. Okay, we know. The base, into the ground. Into the ground. Otherwise, I just weigh mine down with some heavy tiles on the base, and that will hold it. Have you given his bike back yet? No. I'm waiting for him to say he wants his bike

back. I kind of did hint that I wanted it back. I know, I got that hint on Friday. I'm almost there. I'm waiting for him to say he wants his bike back. I kind of did hint that I wanted it back. I know, I got that hint I'm almost there. I am almost there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You let me know

when you are there. Have you been searching for bikes? That's why he said on Friday, have you been looking at bikes? Because I'm getting

ready to get my bike back. But it's hard in level three because a bike's not something you just buy because you see it online. Yeah, you want to sit on it. Sit on it. Right.

Literally. You want to see how it feels on your boot home. Yeah. And, you know, it could be two, you're a big person, you're six foot what?

Tall, bitch. I mean, okay, so I should have said tall. Yeah, six two. No, but that's true because did you know there are different sizes? Yeah, there are frames.

Yeah. So if you're taller... I tell you what, I like those Kevlar tyres you've got though. In case any... If I was in a drive-by I could just hide behind them

and it would protect me like a Kevlar vest. Well, it's just for glass on the road. Yeah. Road, road, like road tyres. Right.

But yeah, you'd want to try one out. But then I've also like... I've done your bike now which is called a commuter bike. Yeah, it's like a hybrid. But when I'm on the commuter bike people on proper road bikes blitz past me. I'm like, maybe I need one of them.

Yeah, they do blitz. They go real fast, eh? They're so fast. It's because they're wearing the Lycra. And they don't weigh much. The bikes and the people on the bikes. Yeah, could it be something to do with the athlete on the bike? Definitely.

Yeah, okay. Definitely. But, you know you gotta do you gotta have the right equipment as well yeah right well you're not

obviously not the only person searching for a bike yeah everybody wants a bike alright 14 minutes away and I imagine

more people are gonna be searching for barbecues now that they've heard about these umbrellas well and certainly umbrellas as well

I'd imagine now that you've told people about them well they're actually on there under outdoor furniture which is also quite highly sought after.

All right, well, let's revisit this list next week and see if umbrellas have shot up. Umbrellas have shot up through the roof. CDM's Fletchborn and Megan. From the dusty ZM sink tank, this is The Top Six. Hello there. A medical journal accused of sexism after it described men and women as bodies with vaginas. Right.

So this article mentions women several times, but then once it says bodies with vaginas. And I guess it was an attempt at inclusivity to include, you know, everyone, because it's not just exclusively women. Cis women who have, it was about periods. Described as well-meaning but unhelpful. Yeah. The term. And but people are cancelling subscriptions.

He's a big uproar. Saying it's sexist and it's regressive. Well, who better to wade into this debate than Vaughan Smith? I've got my boots on and I'm ready to slop in and make a muddy mess as I enter the bog of cancellation. A cis white man telling his opinion. Slop, slop, slop, slop, slop, slop. Hey, why not?

We're used to it. White Saviors. Hey! You look around in the bog of cancellation, you see everybody. Everybody that's names you don't say anymore, because then in the bog of cancellation, that's how they grab

you. Yeah, they pull you down. And then you get cancelled. Top six ways to describe men in medical journals after females described as bodies of the vaginas. Number six, penises with barely functioning brains. Yeah, you said it, not me. The penis with the barely functioning brain. Number five on the list of the top six ways to describe men in medical journals are bodies

with belly buttons full of dark blue lint. Yeah. Why is it always dark blue? I mean, I understand with Fletch because that's all he wears. Yeah. It's only where Navy. Yeah. Actually, my belly button's all he wears. Yeah. It's only where Navy. Yeah. Actually, my belly button lint is pink.

Wow. I know. No one knows why. Ally. Number four on the list of the top six ways to describe men in a medical journal after a woman was described as bodies with vaginas are bodies with hairy ear holes and nose holes. Yeah.

Such hairy. Yeah. Nose holes. Bodies with hairy ear holes and nose holes Such hairy Yeah Nose holes Number three on the list of the top six ways to describe men in a medical journal The bodies with the stinkier butts Yeah Such stinky butts Number two on the list of the top six ways to describe men in medical journals

After a woman was described as bodies with vaginas Stiffy machines Okay I hate it when you vaginas. Stiffy machines. Okay. I hate it when you say that word. Stiffy. Don't. We don't need to say that anymore.

No, it's great when you say that word. I'm already in the bog of cancellation. Where you can scream stiffy. But if no one else is in the bog of cancellation, does it make a noise? Stiffy. Stiffy. Stiffy! Stiffy, stiffy. And number one on the list of the top six ways to describe men in a medical journal after a woman described as bodies with vaginas.

Bodies with pointless nipples. Yes. And do anything. I mean, they're fun to play with. Yeah. I think we can all agree on that. Maybe not everybody. It's not everybody's cup of tea.

To put a clothes peg on. Wow. One of those hard spring-loaded clothes pegs too. I guess we know where all the clothes pegs have gone now. Only the purple ones.

We've all got our colour preference. Ally! That is today's top six. Three in five people were to end a date over annoying food habits. And so this includes things like, in fact, the top most annoying food habit on 68% is talking with your mouth full.

Oh, yeah. Oh, God, okay. That's yuck. Yeah. I wouldn't be the person to say anything, though. I just wouldn't go on a second date. Yeah. But if you went on a date that's food, like a restaurant,

what do you just not have conversation? If you went on a date that's food. Well, no, like if you just, like a coffee date or a drink. A food-based date. Yeah, a food-based date. So you've ordered meals and it's your first time meeting them. Do you just not have conversation while you're eating? Yeah.

Well, like, what if they're asking you questions? You're like... Between mouthfuls. Yeah, just kind'd be like, between mouthfuls. Yeah, just kind of. Yeah, between mouthfuls. Right, just wait. Dainty, you've got to have dainty little mouthfuls so that you can chew and swallow and get back to chatting.

Yeah. Chewing loudly is another one. 64% of people do not like that. And open mouth chewing right behind it on 63%. Oh, God, yeah. If you met an open mouth chewer, you'd be like, no thanks. Gen Zers are the people, they're the most tolerant. 73% said they would ignore the food habit.

73%. So millennials are the ones that would say something. 61% said they would say, hey. Of course they would. Stop, please. I don't think I could. It would just be like, no, no second date. I'm not having it.

Yeah, I wouldn't say anything either. What if they're real hot? Yeah, still go there. It's Reese Walsh pre-cocaine conviction. Imagine if Harry Styles was an open mouth, like, chewer. Yeah. You finally sit down. Harry's ordered a chicken salad.

Oh, of course he has. Yeah, he's not going big red, is he? And he's crunching the croutons. And he's like. So when you show like an Irish soldier. One direction. Does he talk about himself in third person too? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I know. I think that's, nah. That's two strikes. Even for Harry, that's enough. Nah. Are you still having Harry Styles for Harry, that's enough. Nah. Are you still having Harry Styles dreams? Not even anyone for a while. You like me, Bill, or Jane Malek?

Yeah, that's not attractive at all. You've just ruined Harry Styles for a lot of people. But I would like to know, since three out of five would end a date for annoying food habit. Yeah. What's the annoying food habit that you can't stand? Like the open mouth chewing. Like that. I mean, that's got to be right up there, doesn't it?

What's your food deal breaker? It's food related. I don't like it when people hold their knife and fork wrong. Like hold it so far down. Like a shovel. Your fingers are pretty much in the food. Oh. Who does that? You much in the food. Oh. Who does that?

Short grip in it. Yeah. Who does that if they're not kids? Lots of people do it. Yeah, because some people. Do they? Yeah. Because I use a fork like a thing.

I'm not a huge fan of using a fork as a shovel. As a shovel. But if you've got it up the other way and some people put their thumb on the back of the fork. No. Oh, no. You don't have that right in there. That's a real pet peeve of mine.

I can't handle it. Can't handle it. Is it called choking it where you go right down the handle on something? Yeah, right. Yeah, nah. Right. That would be no second date. I wouldn't tell you.

Just no second date. Well, maybe you've been in the situation, if you're listening, maybe you've been on a date with someone and there was eating and something put you off. Or maybe it's just something your partner does and you just cannot deal with it. Yeah. They do this all the time. 0800 dials at him.

You can text as well. 9696. What is your food deal breaker? Three in five people went to end a date over annoying food habits. The top ones were talking with your mouth full, chewing loudly, and open mouth chewing. They were the big ones. Okay. But we wanted to know if there was an annoying food habit

that just really drove you crazy. Maybe your partner does it. And yes, we are hearing from people this morning. There are some grubby people out there. Somebody said, some text messages in on the subject, if you use your teeth to pull the food off the fork Oh man And slide your teeth

Along the metal Yeah No No no no What about people Who just eat really slowly And they put their cutlery down Between mouthfuls

I feel like that would drive you nuts It drives me up the wall They're just like taking a break Enjoying the soup My dad's a slow eater I feel like that would drive you nuts. It drives me up the wall. They're just like taking a break. No, I'm not. My dad's a slow eater, but he's a consistent eater. Right. He just eats slow.

My father-in-law is the slowest eater. Oh, God. I grew up, my mum's family, it was like if you, I can literally remember like my granddad would finish his dinner and just start eating mine. So you had to eat quick or you'd go hungry. And it was absolutely like when Nan made her deviled eggs. Yeah. Oh.

At a barbecue, there was only so many deviled eggs to go around. If you weren't eating your deviled eggs quick enough, people would just steal the deviled eggs off your plate. So we all just eat quick as we can out of fear of someone stealing our food. Somebody else said, if anybody eats Marmite, I'm just like, yuck, no,

your mouth's gonna taste like Marmite now. That is disgusting. I fell out with my best friend of 15 years over her loud chewing. She moved to London after high school

and I went to visit her two days after sharing a room with her, I was like, nope, I gotta go. It's the eating. Because no one told her though. I know. Is she not aware? You've got to. Is it such a habit you can't like when someone tells you, like

your mouth's open, you just can't change? I don't. I know there's people who struggle to breathe, right? Right. When they're eating. Like French bulldogs. Yeah, pretty much the French bulldog at dinner time. Can't put it through their nose or something,

if there's food in their mouth. Somebody asked me if my father-in-law chews like a horse. Open mouth and loud slopping sounds. First thing in the morning, it's not fun. It's not a fun thing. What about, do you know my message in about picky eaters? Because that's another one. Yeah.

Somebody else said when they don't want their food to touch, I'm like, I ain't got time for that. Somebody else grimly said, I went on a date once and they were eating and they got to a chewy bit so they spat it back onto their fork and dumped it on their plate. No, no, no, no, no. Spitting out food is just really nasty.

And then what? It stares at you on the plate for the rest of the meal. Yeah. Like get a napkin at least or try to hide it. Someone said,

I once saw a fully grown man using a spoon when it was a fork that he should have been using. Okay. Was it something liquidy? No, they said it was definitely a fork. A fork meal.

Unless you're a baby, you don't need a spoon. But you use like spoons sometimes. Sometimes. Like a curry. But you have a fork and a spoon. You wouldn't have a knife. Knife and a spoon would never be paired. No, you don't bring a knife to a curry. No, no, no. A curry fight. You have a fork and a spoon. You wouldn't have a knife. Knife and a spoon would never be paired. No, you don't bring a knife to a curry.

No, no, no. A curry fight. No way. You bring a spoon and a fork to a curry fight. And a naan to soak it up. That's what you bring. Yum. Yes.

Go ahead. Naan news. Yeah. Are we happy to now take this over? Absolutely. Take the reins in Sarah Swill's naan town for a moment. Have you found a supermarket naan? No.

Got Indian takeaway at the weekend. Okay. I feel like I know what you're going to say. The sweet naan? Peshwari naan. Yes. Have you ever had the sweet naan? The dessert naan?

What's a sweet naan? You would love the sweet naan. It's got fruit and nuts and coconut and... Sometimes raisins, but not always. Sultans. I don't know if I would like this. It sounds too full on. Is it like a bread and butter pudding, but dry or moist?

I've never had it. What is that? Peshwari naan. Peshwari, I believe. Peshwari naan. Oh, okay. Oh, my Lord. Stumbled across it.

But you don't dip this in butter chicken. Absolutely not, sir. No, it's dessert. Absolutely not, sir. I'd imagine if you had some cream, a bit of cream on top would absolutely go down a treat. But yeah, because I got to the naan section of the ordering,

and there was a roti option, so I was like, I'll have two of them. I like them. And then I saw cheese and garlic naan, I'm like, I'll have two of them. Of course you will. And this is for me and my wife. Yep. Oh, and not the kids? They did actually try it and they liked it.

This is their first time on the naan. And then I was like, what is this peshwari? Peshwari. Peshwari. I apologize. Peshwari naan. Yum. And I loved it.

Okay. I loved it. So there's an additional 600 calories every time I eat it. Yes. Yum. Yes. Yum. And that was without ice cream. Fantastic nah news. Next on the show, producer Jared, who has dressed,

I mentioned last week, I love when he dresses in his dungarees. You've got the dungarees on. And his yellow hoodie because he looks like a minion. Just for you, Fletch. Thank you, Jared. You've got to put the hood up. It's a you, Jared. You've got to put the hood up. It's a wheezy-giggy goggles or something. Yeah, let's get some goggles.

Banana! Next on the show, you've ordered something. Yeah, I saw something when I was scrolling the Facebook and far out. Okay, it's definitely nerd related. I don't know about this. All right, let's delve into this next. Play ZM's Fletch,

Fawn and Megan. Producer Jared today in full Minions attire. He remembered Fletch said that's his favourite outfit. It's my favourite Producer Jared outfit. Can we get a photo of Jared looking like a Minion for our story? Because people may be at home.

Carwin's already all over it. Good stuff. It's good stuff. I'm going to buy you some minion goggles. Winnie needs goggles to look full minion. Yes. Would he be a one-eyed minion or a two-eyed minion? Ooh.

Pretty two-eyed. He'd be a two-eyed minion. Yeah. Easier. Well, you've purchased something online which you thought we'd be very interested to hear about. So we've given you this primetime slot. No pressure.

On the Nationwide Radio Show right now, producer Jared. So make this good. Well, last Friday I was scrolling on Facebook and I saw something that caught my eye. Okay. It involved the words limited edition, Lord of the Rings 2021. I told you it was going to be nerd stuff. So I quickly pressed the buy button, and they're arriving today.

I've got three packs of limited edition Lord of the Rings 2021 stamps. Stamps. When did you become an old person? I thought Lord of the Rings, I could be into this. Stamps. Well, I saw the stamps, and I was like, man, these look cool. What did you see? An ad at a urinal or in a toilet cubicle?

That's literally the only place you see ads for stamps. Call us to check out your stamp collection. We will travel. I got some targeted advertising for New Zealand Post. Oh, my God. The most shocking part about this is how much postage costs nowadays. $2?

$1.50 is the cheapest stamp you can buy now. You can buy a $4 tin stamp. I hope it gets there within two days. Why not just $4? Whoa. Yeah, weird. Okay, so what? Did you get all the sheets? Which ones did you buy? Not which ones? The ones like that six pack. Oh, that what, did you get all the sheets? Which ones did you buy? Not, which ones?

The ones, like that six pack. Oh, this is a $15 one. Yeah, yeah. I was going to say, because there's a $375 pack, and I was going to give you a right telling off if you'd purchased that. But I bought three of the $15 one, because I bought one, and I was like, ooh, what if I decide to use the stamp, and then I don't have a complete set? Oh, my God, Jared, you don't buy these stamps to use them.

Well, I bought one pack to display and two in case. When is the last time you sent a letter? I've never sent a letter. Have you never sent a letter? I've never sent a letter. Oh, that's actually a little bit sad. You courier things now, right?

Yeah. Oh, write someone a letter. Yeah, I might. I used to like as a kid licking the stamp for my parents. Christ alive. You don't have to do that anymore. I've got bad saliva for licking and sticking. You have to use that thing they used to have, the roller thing.

If I lick the back of an envelope and then try to seal it, no, sir, it will just curl up at the edges. No, it's too dry. No, it's plenty wet in our mouth. But I don't know why. Does anybody else suffer from this? I had a friend that did one of the COVID tests where you spit in the tube and said it took him ages because he was just like.

It's not a dry mouth. Stop spreading rumors. Maybe it's too sloppy. mouth. He's like, stop spreading rumours. Maybe he's too sloppy. Maybe I'm too sloppy. You're slopping off the adhesive. Maybe because if you were sloppy, you'd lick the litter. I think I've got a cynic tongue. Or a base tongue.

Have you got thrush or something? Yeah, God, maybe I've got thrush. Lucky you don't have a vagina. You bloody mess. Well, my pH balance would be out of whack. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, absolutely. All right.

I thought you were still on about the dryness. How dare you accuse my non-existent vagina of dryness. That too. Good sir. And that, even if it was dry, that's a problem some of us women have. Jesus. Thank you. But again,

it's not a dry mouth. It's a very wet mouth. Why don't you write Jared a letter and tell him about it? We won't be able to sell it. Nor the stamps

are now self-adhesive. Send him a postcard. Do you have a stamp collection or is this starting? I might start one now. Oh, God,

it's too late. It's too late. You've got to inherit these things. Jesus. And next week you'll be like, I. You've got to inherit these things. Jesus. And next week you'll be like, I'm having noodles four days from payday. I'll be like, you know why? Because you bought stamps you don't need.

The price is only going to go up on those bad boys. Oh, my God, is it? I'm so excited about simple things. Are you sure? No. Yeah, they made a lot of them. And as French said, no one's sending letters anymore, so it feels like people would only buy these for their... You know, I've got a set of them. And as Fletch said, no one's sending letters anymore, so it feels like people would only buy these for their...

You know, I've got a set of King Kong stamps. I'll trade you. Alright, nerds. Convene later. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. A YPAR District Council Zoom meeting that was recorded in April 2020. So, initial lockdown, baby.

It was the... I had to Google where Yipa is. South of Hamilton? Yeah, so like Tiawamuti, Cambridge area. Every time you say Waipa, I just say Delta. Yeah, the Waipa Delta. Oh, Waipa Delta. Oh!

Okay, that's really out of business. Yeah. That was the steamship, wasn't it? There was a paddler that would go up and down the Wakatu River. It was a big, beautiful boat. Probably my most distinct memory of that would be

when we went to Farmers in Hamilton and we were in the Sega system. They had an area, a corner where you could go and play the new Sega games.

So I'm like a kid and some kids were talking about how they'd just come up from the bridge because they'd done a poo off the side of the bridge

onto the delta. Is it paddled under? So I was paddling down. Imagine that. You're out enjoying a lovely weekend river cruise, lovely weather, and a poo lands on the deck beside you and you look up and there's some kids, some young teens, little rat bags. So anyway, this Waipare District Council is the regular finance and corporate committee. It's a Zoom meeting.

Okay. I'm looking at a screen cap here. You've got 12, 13, 14, 15 participants in the meeting. And it's just a boring old meeting. However, people are using it when they are at home and they're not in a Zoom call to get some peace and quiet from their families and flatmates. When I saw this story initially, I thought it was one of those crazy meetings

that someone found the link to and shared it around. And so people were just jumping on it. Yeah. Interrupting it. Nothing happens. Nothing interesting happens. And so people are just jumping on it? Yeah. Interrupting it? Nothing happens. Nothing interesting happens. And so people are just using it as like stock footage. Yeah.

So that people won't annoy them. So they're going to be like, hey guys, I'm just on a Zoom. Can we shh, shh, shh? Just put a podcast on. But that is well and good. People are getting called out though that live overseas because everyone's like, what are those accents? Oh, you've got headphones on.

Oh, you've got headphones on. Okay, yeah, right. You okay you got headphones on so that's the key have headphones on yeah like looking at the um looking at the people in there it could be a bunch of white people from anywhere in the world really yeah okay um but yeah it just it's got the perfect mix of people who just look reluctantly dragged into a meeting, a Zoom meeting. How do you fake your camera? Or do you just say yours is off? I guess you could just say yours. And then every now and then you just have to go, yeah, yeah, yeah.

There's 15 people on the screen. Right, okay. So you've got to have a good look to see who's in there. Wow, and so how many views has it had? It had at the time of the story, which was three days ago, it had 300,000 views. And people only picked up on it

because in the comment section on YouTube, because they, for public record, put these meetings online. Anyone else using this just so they can sound like they're in a meeting so that their family members don't disturb them while working from home? Somebody else said, I've used this meeting six times now. I feel like I'm part of a group.

It's a great video to use so no one disturbs me while I'm working. Oh my god, that's amazing. Famous. ZM's Flesh Warner Megan. Play ZM. Stepping up to the podium for the 10th year of Nero, your gold medalist.

Where's my medal? Well, it's time for Where's My Medal, a segment of the show that awards medals to those small life achievements. Uh-huh. Those little ones that maybe you achieved and you thought, I'm not even going to tell anybody because it seems so insignificant. Well, to us, we won't hear it.

Yeah, well, maybe it's the opposite. No one in your life cares, but you feel you should be rewarded. How rude. We go to Sarah first. Good morning, Sarah. Good morning. What's the small life achievement, the small thing you've done that deserves a medal?

So yesterday I vacuumed under not one but two couches. Oh, wow. And not just like a cursory sweep under it. I picked them up and I moved them. I did the whole shebang. Wow, wow, wow. Because I know that's a big thing for you, isn't it, Warren? If you're going to vacuum, you like to move the couch.

Do it properly, yeah. Flip the couch up one way, vacuum, then roll it back the other way so you can get the other side. it, Warren? If you're going to vacuum, you like to move the couch. Do it properly, yeah. Flip the couch up one way, vacuum, then roll it back the other way so you can get the other side. CBS. Yeah. I don't think I've ever vacuumed under my couch ever. No one can see it. No one can see it. I go to like where the head goes under the couch and it disappears. I'm like, that's

enough. Yeah. I can't see the dust now. Oh, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's been a while here too. What did you find under there? Any goodies? I found a hair here, too. What did you find under there? Any goodies? I found a hair clip, which I'd been looking for for ages, so that was very exciting. Oh, nice. Okay.

That was my winning prize. That was your reward. And half of a remote control car. Half? I don't know where the other half is. Okay. It's gone. It's gone. All right, Sarah.

Wait there. I met Sarah Muddy soon. Liz, good morning. Why do you deserve a medal? Oh, look. right, Sarah. Wait there. I'm going to have a ceremony soon. Liz, good morning. Why do you deserve a medal? Oh, look. Hello, everybody. Hi. I finally, after about four YouTube videos,

learned how to curl my hair with a hair straightener. Oh, babes. I know. Wait, it's a straightener, but you're curling your hair with it? Yeah. How do you? It's revolutionary. How do you do it? Do you twist curling your hair with it. Yeah. How do you... It's a little illusionary. What do you do?

How do you do it? Do you just twist it like spaghetti? You've actually got to straighten your hair first before you curl it. That's my new tip. Okay. You've got to put it up at the roots and then bring it down and then you've got to twist it a certain way to frame your face and then you've got to twist it another way to actually get the real banging curls.

Sounds good. I know. And a little bit of hairspray never hurt anybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right, right. Yeah. How long had you been like wondering, how can I curl my hair? Was this a lockdown-induced thing?

Yeah, no. I'm going to say, and this is going to make me sound silly, I'm going to say about eight months. Wow. That is a good achievement, though, a good achievement. All right, our medal ceremony minutes away. Wait there, Liz. Nadia, why do you deserve a medal?

Good morning. Well, on Saturday, I think it was, for the first time since lockdown started, I went to the supermarket and I didn't buy any treats. I just got what was on my list. Oh, wow. That's a big deal. Yeah. Now the trick is to not go to the dairy to buy the treats you didn't get.

No, I was going to say. I usually do that, yeah. Yeah, go to the dairy to buy milk and buy like six dollars worth of lollies with it. I did that too last week. I was like, oh my God, I brought no treats. And then I'm like, nah, just go to the dairy downstairs. Yeah and buy like six dollars worth of lollies with it. I did that too last week. I was like, oh my God, I brought no treats. And then I'm like, nah, just go to the dairy downstairs. Yeah. A couple of hours later.

Or you get home and you're like, oh, that was an exhausting trip to the supermarket. At least I got myself treats. And you're like, oh my God, I didn't get myself treats. I know. I know. All right. Okay, Nadia, it's time for our medal ceremony. The panel will now...

This is a hard one today. It is a hard one. I'm giving you a thumbs up. Normally you write down. Normally I didn't write it down. I didn't write it down today. Why didn't you write it down today? You're voting. You took the charge there. Yeah.

Happy to Happy to oblige. Bronze today! For her services to her own, now curly locks. She learnt to curl her hair with a hair straightener, but you have to straighten

it first and a little bit of hairspray. Never hurt anybody, apart from the ozone hole. Liz, congratulations. Bronze medal today. And you look gorgeous. I know, that's what I tell myself. And so you should. You know, it would be great to settle down tonight with a lovely glass of...

Oh, Collie McNugget Rose. No worries. But when is she going to bring out a Pinot Gris? She's got a Pinot Gris in the works, I think, darling. Oh, does she? Does she? Yeah. I think she does, darling. Absolutely loving it.

Yeah. Okay, all right. Well done, Liz. It might not be on our shores yet, but God, it'll be on the way. Oh, you know she's working on it. I'm like a cat in the bowl with that Kylie McNugget year one. Silver medal today. For services.

Well, disservices to herself, really, because she didn't get any treats when she went to the supermarket. But services to her list and her willpower. Yeah. Congratulations, silver medal for Nadia sticking to the grocery list. Thank you. Thank you. Well done.

I'll go get some treats to celebrate. Yes, do it. I recommend a Kylie McNew Rosé. Oh, beautiful, Darl. Beautiful. Beautiful. Thanks, Darl. Which means the gold medal today can only go to one.

What's happening? Is that a moan of delight? Oh, is that a child? It's a child. I thought you were moaning in delight. Oh, I won. Because she vacuumed under not one, but two couches. Oh, my goodness.

I hope she finds the other half of that remote control car. Yes. The mystery playing in New Zealand today. Congratulations, Sarah. A gold medal. Hooray. I'd like to thank my son for having a nap and my back for holding up while I looked at both the countries.

Yes. Yes. Humble. Such a humble victor. Well done, Sarah. All right, the news next, and then we've got a big announcement. Do stick around.

ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. Want to talk about when your exes got involved in your current relationship? Maybe messaged you some advice? Yep. The thing about this yesterday was Sir John Key's open letter to New Zealand. Five ideas to transform the approach to Delta. It got you thinking because the exes come back

and they're like, we're with our new girlfriend, Cindy, and we dumped John like... We're doing what we can. Yeah. I saw so many people sharing this yesterday. He had five points

that he thought he'd bring up. My favourite was a $25 voucher for everybody between 12 and 29 if they get vaccinated before December 1st. I was on a side note. I was reading the 12 to 29 vax stats were terrible. Real low, guys. Come on. Terrible.

We need to get out of this lockdown. We need to get on with life. So if you're 12 to 29, there are spots available today. Just walk up, book my vaccine. Dilly-dallying, that would take care of the dilly-dalliers. Yeah. A little incentive to get out there. But if you're an anti-vaxxer

and you're going to throw in your principles for $25. Yeah. You know. It's quite amusing. Was it really a principled stance in the first place? But, you know, a few points there. I like to tell New Zealand the borders will open, like when they're going to open

and you best have your shit sorted by then or you're going to get dealt out. But then that's also running the risk of people being like, nah, and then it's still going to crowd the... Look, I don't have the answers, but I just thought it was funny. And everyone was like, here he is, he's back. And I was like, that's like your ex coming into a relationship and being like, I noticed your new partner

is not respecting you enough. Or something like that. Get out of my DMs. We broke up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe they're offering you a little bit of, oh, is this the new partner, is it? They're a bit trashy looking.

I don't think they're good for you. Yeah. My thoughts are, and I just got me thinking, if anybody's ever dealt with their ex getting involved in their new relationship with maybe some advice. Maybe even what if they got in contact with your new partner?

No. And were like, you want to watch their bad, these are their work-ons. Who would get the balls to do that? Crazy people. And if this last two years has taught me anything, they're out there in droves.

Okay. So we want to open up the phone lines now. 0800 dials at M. You can text in as well. 9696. When's an ex given you advice on your new relationship? Or stuck their nose in? When have they stuck their nose into your relationship?

Yoo-hoo. Only me! Wow. Alright, well, you know what's going to happen. 0800 Dials at M. Give us a call. There are some crazy... We are getting a lot of crazy stories and messages coming in. We're asking

you this morning, when the ex has stuck their nose in to your new relationship. This would be a hot button topic. Well, we're with our new girlfriend now, Jacinda. Get out, John! And our ex, John Keyes, all like, you should do this.

You should do this. And that aside, we're not debating that. It was like John Keyes broke up with us. He's like, I'm breaking up. Yeah, he did. He left us. Yeah, he left us. And he's like, but I got you a new boyfriend. His name's Bill. And we're like, oh, what kind of pizza does he make?

Spaghetti with pineapple on the top. And then we were like, what? How long do we have to be with him? He's like, well, that's up to you. And then it was up to us. Then we got a new partner. And now he's like, hey, guys, this is what I do. We're like, hey, hey, hey, hey I do. Hey, hey, hey, hey.

Whoa. You're our ex, remember? Yeah. Ex for a reason. Somebody, some text messages in. These are all pretty charged. Okay. Mine's the opposite.

My ex is having issues with our son and his new partner and is asking for my advice on what they can do. I told him to F asterisk asterisk K. Yep. Oh, hang on. Yep, I got it. Okay, yeah. What did you get? Show you're working.

Mine's filk. Same. Which is fake silk. Yeah. I told him to filk off in a nice way. Ain't my problem. He made his bed. He has to sleep in it.

Oh, yeah, okay. One of my boyfriend's ex-girlfriends reached out to me and told me that he had been talking S-H-asterix-T, so that is shot, about me behind my back. We became best friends. Oh, wow. He's ended up in jail and has three kids of which he has custody on none of them. So I guess I've dodged a bullet there.

Yeah, I'd say so. Wow. Ruby, when did an ex stick their nose in? Ruby. We're having some phone issues with Ruby. We'll just pop that on hold and see if we can get to her soon. Was Ruby a text message or a call? Okay, Ruby was a call, so I can read these other text messages

and not spoil Ruby's story. That's why I asked. My ex's ex. So they've broken up with this person, but the person they were in a partnership beforehand messaged me and said, you must be living your best life now when I broke up with my ex. So they had something in common. They were

both this person's ex-partner. Right. See, well done on breaking up with them. You must be living your best life. And now we're Snapchat pals. I heard you've got a streak. Yeah. My name is Sarah. Hello, Sarah. Hi, Sarah. Should I have you read on?

She said it. Okay. My name is Sarah. My current partner's Should I have you read on? She said it. Okay. My name is Sarah. My current partner's ex is trying to break our relationship up by spreading rumors and blatant lies. Apparently, it's the new thing to do when someone is happy. Oh. She told me that he would lie and cheat on me when she's the one who cheated and ended the relationship. Well, you forget about her, Sarah. What's her name?

Bloody Marie? Marie! Mate, let's... No, I believe we may have Ruby back. Ruby, good morning. Hi, there. Oh, that's good. We thought you'd crashed your car or something. Oh, no.

Okay, fuel. So when's an ex stuck their nose in? So basically I was going to go travel overseas and my ex wasn't really that great, so I decided to break up with her beforehand. And while I was overseas, I found a new boy and somehow he found out and texted and called him and tried to tell him to back off. Oh, my God.

Good Lord. Was the new boy also from New Zealand, or was he? Yeah. Oh, right. Oh, that was a little giggle there. That giggle told a thousand stories. And he tried to tell his parents that it was my mum's fault, so they went into her work.

Oh, my God. But when you broke up with him, it was obviously over, but so they went into her work. Oh my god. But when you broke up with them, it was obviously over but he just hadn't got the message. Still had feelings. So when they went into your mum's work, what did they say to her? Well, they even went up to her boss. Oh my god. What?

Yeah, they went up to her boss and said, this is what your daughter did to our son. What was the boss like? Cool. Get out. We're running a business and stuff? Yeah. That's crazy.

Hey, but good news. Nothing makes your new boyfriend want you more than a bit of competition. Oh, I don't want him. Still with that? Still with the new one? No. Oh, okay. What a heartbreaker.

Yeah, absolutely. A heartbreaker. Ruby there. Ruby the heartbreaker. Yeah, absolutely a heartbreaker. Ruby there. Ruby the heartbreaker. Thanks for calling, Ruby. Ask some messages in. My ex told my new partner I was sleeping with my other ex. Yeah. Are you doing a diagram in your head?

Yeah, because I didn't lend her $170. It's such a specific amount. Then I ended up sleeping with my ex who told my partner I was sleeping with my ex. The cheek of it. The cheek of it. The cheek of it. The cheek. My newly married hubby and I went to the bank to sort out name changes on accounts, etc.

Yeah. Upon leaving, a teller returned from lunch, stopped us, and said hi to my husband, got a bit gushy, and said she could have taken care of it for us. And to see her next time we needed any banking issues sorted. Excuse me, husband, who dat? It turns out she was an ex.

So no. So no, she won't be our banking representative. You won't be sorting out my finances. I told my ex-husband not to behave in any way, shape or form the same way he did in our marriage. And he should be okay at his next marriage. She looks miserable every time I see her, so I can only assume my advice was not taken.

You tried. You can sleep easy. My partner's ex is genuinely crazy. She's constantly turning up at my work and trying to break us up that way. She partner's ex is genuinely crazy. She's constantly tuning up on my work and trying to break us up that way. She calls us both throughout the day just to have a go at us for being together and tried to contact my entire family, telling them I have to dump him. You're just proving why that breakup was necessary. Wow.

Yeah. I'm sorry that you're going through these dramas. It sounds horribly exhausting. Yeah, horribly. CDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Fact of the day, day you go to Gothenburg, Sweden, you can see a taxidermied blue whale. A whole blue whale?

A whole blue whale. One of the big blue whales. What'd they stuff that with? They made a wooden frame and then kind of put the skin around the wooden frame. Oh, that's smart. When it beached itself, this was in the early 1900s. Yeah, right. So it was a different time.

I don't want anyone to think this happened in the last couple of weeks and go, oh, cancelling Sweden. That's what Megan says about all of her fur coats, because they're from the 1800s, it's okay. The animal's dead. Yeah. You're not going to read. To burn a fur coat would achieve nothing

apart from wastefulness. So if you want to tip a bucket of blood on Megan. I don't have. Don't do it when she's wearing her polar bear coat because that's white and the colour won't come out. Maybe do that the day that she's wearing her red fox fur. Please don't tip. If you see me wearing fur,

it's very much like polyester. Okay, don't tip. Oh, that's what they say. Don't tip paint on me. It's got a fake polyester fox head on it too. So different times. The whale beached itself. A fisherman found it and said,

I'm about to do terrible things to you, and poked its eyes out so I couldn't see them doing it. Because it was still alive. But this was just back in the day. You look absolutely terrified. That's horrible. Next day, a guy called August turns up. Okay.

He's a taxidermist and a curator of the Gothenburg Museum. And he's like, I will buy this whale from you. Good sir. And the guy's like, here's a shilling. How much was it? I poked its eyes out. Does it affect your price? we'll buy this whale from you. Good sir. And the guy's like, here's a shilling. How much was it? I poked its eyes out. Does it affect your price?

The guy's like, what did you do with the eyes? So anyway, he purchases it and he's like, well, I want to put this on display. However, I believe I have the facilities to not have to cut it up to transport it. Yep. So it took three steamboats and two coal barges multiple days to tow it up the river to the closest part of the museum that was waterbound. So then they removed its organs and preserved them in barrels.

They began treating the skin over a number of weeks so that it would last and sort of preserve. The skeleton was boiled and cleaned and a wooden frame was made in a whale shape and then they put the skin over it and they also hinged the jaw so that you could open it and go inside it. Oh, wow. There's photos of people having dinners. I'll see if I can make this one larger.

Here's a family having a dinner inside a blue whale. Oh, yeah. Very hard to get out and go to the toilet if you're on the other end of the blue whale table. Yeah, I mentioned there's no fire emergency at the back. So that was a special occasion, but the jaws were hinged thus that you could just go in and then wind up the jaw and give yourself some privacy.

Right. And, well, it was in the 1930s when two amorous museum goers were found making love inside the Blue Whale. Okay. That it then became only opened by the museum on special occasions. See, I mean, I don't know about you, but nothing gets me more turned on than. Being in the insides of a blue whale. Dead blue whale.

You're like, ooh, I feel like Jonah. But what's Jonah Loma got to do with it? You're like, no, the Bible. The Bible. Okay, you be Jonah, I'll be Pinocchio. Those are two. But we're both men. Well, God, we're inside a whale.

Let's just live a little, you know. Tell a lie. Just live a little. Tell a lie? What are you? I hate being inside this blue whale. You got that, didn't you? Tell me one of your big filthy lies, Pinocchio.

Keep lying. Yeah. Okay, Jonah, why don't you run it straight? No, you got the wrong Jonah again! Oh, God, I don't know much about him. And he come out the blue hole. I think he did. Okay.

Today's fact of the day. And then they shut it. Oh, right, they shut it. So, today's fact of the day is he used to be able to have dinner in a blue whale until somebody went and had sex in it. So today's fact of the day is he used to be able to have dinner in a blue whale until somebody went and had sex in it. Fact of the day day, day, day,

day. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. There is a trend of soft launching relationships. We don't really update your status on Facebook anymore. We were talking about that the other week. Yeah. It kind of was a thing. And you'd see it pop up and be like,

so-and-so's in a relationship with so-and-so, and you'd be like, ooh. And then even like back in the day, there was no way to hide that if you broke up with someone. Like they hadn't invented that thing where only you could see it. Your privacy settings. Yeah. And so if you broke up with someone on Facebook, everyone knew.

Exactly. So there's a new trend and celebrities are doing this. Yep. They're soft launching their relationship on Instagram before you do a hard and fast couple picture, like Adele. Right. So it's kind of like laying breadcrumbs that you're initially kind of in a relationship.

Who came up with this term? It sounds like you're dating a PR girl. She's like, I think, or an influencer, and they're like, I think we should soft launch. Yeah, it's the business. Let's go for the low-hanging fruit. While you're trying to iron out all the kinks, you do your soft launch.

Yeah. We need to do some 360 thinking. Yeah. No, blue sky thinking. Yeah. Keep it 360. You do your hard launch and promo once you've ironed out all the kinks. All the kinks.

Right. So apparently it's very important to discuss with your new partner exactly, like define the relationship before you start doing this. Because they might not want their other girlfriend seeing you posting pics of them. Is that what you meant? Yeah. Sure. Always check.

Yeah. Yeah. You need to get the timing right. So apparently the time of the year when like single people settle down with each other and make it through winter is the thing. Like hibernating bears. Yes. Aren't they?

You need to agree on the picture you're going to post when you decide to do the official thing. So what kind of picture would you be posting for a soft launch? Not a really lovey-dovey one, more of a here's us hanging out at mini golf or something, but not looking together, but you're with someone. That kind of picture. Didn't Rita Ora and Tyka kind of do a soft launch, eh? Yeah, and that three-way kiss with Tessa Thompson.

Now that's a powerful relationship. That's an extreme launch, that one. Which one am I dating? Both? One? But yeah, like pictures of you just hanging out. Right, okay. And then maybe like, I don't know, I'm not very

good at teasing, you know. I'm just like straight in there with it. Right. What's our ROI on this, guys? What's that? Return on investment. Carwin at the social media desk raises a great point. A good photo for a soft launch. What would your example be?

Like a picture when you're out for dinner. Yeah. And just a picture of the food, but their hands are in it. Oh, you're like a little side hand? Oh, so people are like, who do hands? Oh, yeah. Or like,

who does hands, girl? So there's a hint of like, oh, there's a guy with me. Someone's arm. Or you do like a little video

looking out at the scenery and then there's just like a shoulder. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You always see those and people totally know what they're doing.

Yeah, Fletch does those. No, I don't. Or you go on holiday and there's another pair of shoes there. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. You always see those. Yeah. And people totally know what they're doing. Yeah, Fletch does those. No, I don't. Well, you go on holiday and there's another pair of shoes there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then in the next video, the shoes are gone. And you're like, oh, no, there were shoes there before. No, it's important to put the shoes in the wardrobe. I use hotel wardrobes.

You don't want to trip. A lot of people don't. You don't want to trip on the shoes. A lot of people don't. Yeah. That's a soft launch. Yeah. You just never get to trip on the shoes. A lot of people don't. That's a soft launch. You just never get to the hard launch part. If you're a dude and you want to do that dinner idea,

I reckon if you painted your nails and made one of your hands look feminine, then just put it on. You couldn't do that. Look at your leathery ring. No, no. I've had a man hand. And hairy. You could do it if you shaved your legs, if you want to put a like rogue,

because I've always said you've got very good calves. Yeah, very thin calves. And what about all the cycling you've been doing on my bike? It's just pounds the quads, mate. It's just absolutely blown out the ass, you know. You should see my bootay at the moment. Can you not say pounds the qu see my bootay at the moment. But the calves. Can you not say pounds? It's my quads and bootay in the same.

It's boosting the quads, dog. Look at these quads. Oh, yeah. Let's go. It's like a ham. It's like a Christmas ham. The calves. Not even a shank.

Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughn and Megan. Megan just behind the scenes introducing Vaughan to a new brioche bun that we found at the supermarket. We were just having burger chat, how to make yum burgers at home, and then, yeah, gone on to brioche rolls. So the fact that if you've been listening all morning, we've talked about that. We just had a very in-depth chat about Smash Burgers

and their Peshawari naans. Yep. Mentioned Kylie Minogue. Kylie Minogue news. Rosé as well. Absolute heaven when it hits the lops. It's like I'm pashing Charlene from Neighbours in 1987. You know what I'm saying?

Yeah, it is. Vintage Kylie. Yeah, it is. So that might have more to do with it But Somehow Someone ended up on the scales Over the weekend

And it was confronting Why? It was confronting I was weighing our dog Yeah Ralph Because Indy was like How heavy is he compared to me?

Yeah So I was like Well let's say you weigh a dog You weigh yourself And then you pick the dog up And then you minus the difference Yeah Oh Horn Why did you do that You weigh yourself and then you pick the dog up and then you minus the difference. Yeah.

Oh, horn. Why did you do that? No one else could pick up the dog. We were like, we don't know how heavy Bastion is because he hasn't been to Plunkett for ages. And so we were like, we have to get on the scales. And I was like, I'm not doing it. No, you just put a foot on the scales to start it and then put the baby on it.

He's not going to stay there. It's wobbly. More than a cat. Maybe you need to get a... No, I got the... You need to get fishing scales and put them in a it. He's not going to stay there. It's wobbly. More than a cat. Maybe you need to get a... No, I got the... You need to get fishing scales and put them in a bag. No, just hang them like a bloody prize marlin. No, take them to the supermarket today and do it where you do the bananas.

Oh, yeah, sit them in the... That's a good idea. Just put them on the self-suit. Well, I tell you what, I wasn't getting on the scales. Do not. Absolutely no way. Let this be a warning. What's the damage?

Don't put on the scales. What's the damage? I think like seven kgs. Do not. Absolutely no way. Let this be a warning. Don't be understaffed. What's the damage? I think like seven kgs. Seven kgs. You've been doing a lot of bicycling. I've been doing more eating. And so much in the garden. Oh, yeah.

It's definitely not muscle. But hey, are you happy? You're happy. I couldn't be happier. Yeah. Exactly. I'd be happier eating this burger. I haven't noticed an extra seven kgs.

I am in our hallway. We've got a mirror in our hallway at home. Now, this is my favourite mirror in the house. Yep. Here's why. When you walk under the hallway light, it casts a downward shadow and it somehow makes it look like you've got some sort of shape to your stomach. Okay, like eggs.

So every now and then I'll do a walk down to the laundry and then I'll walk back up towards the bedroom tensing and be like, yep, you still got it? Still happy with that? And that's all I need today. Holding it all in there was hard. But yeah, Sade, I got the scales out and we were sitting outside. I put them on the deck

and she's like, no, what are you doing? I was like, you lift the dog. She's like, I'm not lifting the dog. I was like, no. Yeah, so here's my ploy. And if I may, Hot Auckland, I was like, yeah. Yeah. So here's my ploy. Yeah. I think, and if I may,

Hot Auckland, I'll speak on our behalf. This is Hot Auckland. This is a club you belong to when you're hot and you live in Auckland. Is this your idea for vaccination numbers?

This is my idea to get vaccination numbers. Okay. We're in lockdown. Yep. The hot people are getting fat. Are you saying, right,

okay, yeah. Yours truly included. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Now, it's probably not too much of a problem for me because i'm at this level of attractiveness where i'll kind of move into the like the tony soprano they'll like woman or look and be like i'm not sure why i'm attracted dad bod and all that but like there's something powerful about him now that's okay for me you can embrace that. And I'm married so I don't need to worry too much about this.

It's still nice to get the looks and the whistles. I'll take it. Here's the problem. We need to get vaccinated so that gyms can reopen and we can work on our hot summer bods. The more dilly-dallying, we're not going to get back to level two which is where gyms can reopen. Yeah.

And, well, I'm afraid to say it, hot people are getting less hot. So if you want something to perv on. Right. Get vaccinated. Your idea is, like, how would this ad campaign roll out? Hey there, pervy. Yeah. A little vax hesitant. Yep.

Well, while you're mucking around doing your own research online, that falls short of clinical trials, so it's not really research so much as passing the time while you take a poop. Hot fit people are getting fat. Okay, yeah. And if you want someone to gawk your good eyes on this summer, then get vaccinated so the whole people can get back to pumping iron.

Because not everybody's got a home gym. I do. That's not our thing. If I had one, I honestly think I'd just probably walk and look at it and be like, no. Yeah, totally.

Now, tell me more about them Sweet ZDM's Flashpoint and Megan