ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 3rd December 2020

Episode Date: December 2, 2020

Exit Survey  Top 6: Richie McCaw  Producer Jared joined a Club  Audio Ninja Warrior!  Am I a Bad Person?  Bet I Can Guess Your Mums Name!  What sneaky purchase did your partner find?  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe by 5 McCafe Coffees. Get one free on the Maccas app. Thank you to all of our podcast listeners on Spotify who have been sending in their screenshots of their year of 2020 podcast listening. Yeah, their minutes listened. Some incredible minutes and hours racked up. Yeah, some real losers out there with nothing better to do.

What? No, I didn't say that. I don't know how they did it. Put up with this for hours. Put up with that. Don't point at me. As you'll hear us talk about on the podcast today, I don't know if your podcast listening

will beat Megan's Harry Styles listening. Yeah, but you're saying it like I should be ashamed of it. I'm not ashamed. I'm a very supportive fan. You were in that, Megan worked out, you're in the top 0.2% of Harry Styles listeners. Just 2%.

You're in the 0.5%. You actually are a higher Harry Styles. No, Megan's higher than me. But also, that doesn't count our listening at work or our videos. No, no, it really doesn't. our listening at work Or our videos The YouTube watches You listened to a wider range of Harry Styles Whereas Megan was very honed in

That was an album I just put on loop For a lot of this year It's a very good album Whereas Megan just honed in on the horny songs I'm just looking at some people that have sent ours in Heather Listened for 197 episodes and 13,281 minutes of the show. That is incredible. Thank you, Heather.

Jenny? No, Gwynny? Gwynny? Okay. Gwynny? It might be Gwynny. Gwynny. It might be Gwynny.

Okay. She listened for 268 episodes for a total of 20,699 minutes. Wow. That's the... I'd like to think people are more knowledgeable for it too. Oh, definitely. I mean, you could have used those minutes. Holy shit. Courtney listened for 35,000 minutes, a total of 281 episodes.

Are these people who fall asleep and it carries on playing? Maybe. I've always thought that to be like a compliment you could take either way. Yeah. I find you so redundantly mind-numbing that you put me to sleep. Well, however many minutes and hours you listen to, we certainly do appreciate it and enjoy today's podcast. ZM. Hit music. Live the air show, Fleeche Morning Megan, on a tourist date.

Good morning. Really thought today was Friday. It is not. It is not. Why can't I get my headphones out of my bag? They're all tangled up. Just plug the end in and put the other end on your ears. Let the bag flap around. Do you think people are really... You can let your bags flap? Do you think people are getting over work and the year and just everything?

Can I be honest? Yep. That was about August for me. I think it was about August for me I think it was about Yeah August for everyone Right okay July So yeah fine

Yeah God yeah I mean you might be the only one With any Any remaining smidge Of work ethic left Well at least you've Got more than us

So actually you probably don't But it's just more than you But it's just by comparison We have been noticing That you've been coming later and later to work it's been I was sat behind a police car

on the drive in this morning and you know you can only drive 95 when you go behind a police car no and that bit where it says 80 but no one goes 80 but the police car goes 80

so you gotta go 75 jeez Louise you should live a little just go like 85 see what they do you flew up Behind me Went

Undertook me Yep Then got in that lane And then saw the cop And was like I love that When someone I love that

That frantic breaking When someone first That's why we're going slow Sees a police officer Do you think the police Get really annoyed When people drive like 40 And 50k zones?

Because they're like, oh. And they're just like, oh, I've got to hurry up. I just use my sirens all the time. I'd use it for my lunch break, for going home. I'd definitely use it for going home. Because sometimes you see a cop car do that. They're like, woo, woo. And then they just stop up ahead.

You're like, you just went and ran three lights. Cheating. I like to imagine the emergency's been downgraded. Has been cancelled. Someone else made it to the scene. Is there a, because I know the New Zealand police do listen to the show. We've had them partake in the show before.

Absolutely. Are there like grades of the, do you get like, come in car 44? You're allowed to use all your tricks, come in, car 44. I don't know if that's how it happens. You're allowed to use all your tricks, all the bag of tricks. So you're like siren, lights, near them, running lights. And the, and the, to get past people. Or they're like, Steve, car 44, get over here, mate, but it's not too urgent.

It's not too urgent. Lights but no siren. Oh, okay, right. Lights but no. Because I always get really sad when a cop car's going the opposite way to you and you see the lights coming and you're like, listen, and then it goes past and it wasn't sirening. Oh, okay, yeah.

It was just lights. I think it's trying to be thoughtful of the neighbourhood, right? I want to hear that siren go... Past. I love those sounds. Yeah, you're like... Okay. The top six is coming up,

and Richie McCaw doing his bit for New Zealand tourism. He jumped out of a plane. His first time, because he can fly them, fly his helicopter. But he's never jumped out of one. And a glider. Never been skydiving.

Richie McCaw. Mind you, tandem skydiving, he'd probably be on the verge of how heavy you could be. Yeah. Not that he's, he certainly isn't obese, but he's a unit. I know that when we went skydiving with the Air Force, they're used to jumping in with guns and all kinds of, you know, equipment, so they can jump quite heavy.

Their parachutes can jump with like multiple hundreds of kilograms. Whereas if you're over a certain kg with commercial flights, depending on the guy you're being strapped to, you might not be able to jump. That's why when I first did it, I was strapped to a tiny person because I was so big. They had to be small. So I was strapped to the smallest person. So when I stood up, it was like they were...

It's like mini me. Like a little possum on my back. Yeah, like a little mini me. So I've got the top six other ways Richie McCaw can burst New Zealand tourism. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. I think, Megan, this could be the story of 2020.

It gets better and better as I read. Big call. An ultra-conservative MP. Oh, I know this story. Yes, it's the story of the year. From Belgium has leapt out of a window as police raided the orgy he was taking part in during lockdown.

Now, he's an ultra-conservative politician. Yes. In Belgium. Yeah. Now, was it a gay orgy? Or was it a mixed? I think it was mixed, but it does say predominantly male. Oh, okay.

Predominantly male. 25 strong, mostly male sex party in Brussels city centre. Brilliant. Police were sent there because of the noise that was happening and the neighbours were like, there's so much noise coming from that place. And obviously they're in lockdown and there's COVID restrictions.

Yes. And so Joseph, or Joseph, he, when the police raided, jumped out of the first floor of a flat above a bar where the lockdown orgy was being held. They found him outside, so he's fine. But he had some blood on his hands and he had a backpack on and inside the backpack they found some drugs, which he was like, I don't know how they got there.

Those are not mine. He had no ID on him, so they took him back to his home and he produced a European Parliament diplomatic passport and claimed immunity. Oh my God. So is he not from Belgium? Or he is? No, he is.

You can only claim immunity if you're from another country, right? He's a Hungarian politician, so if he was in Brussels. Right, okay, yeah, right. In Belgium. But he was not the only one. So apparently there were two EU diplomats at this lockdown orgy as well who have also claimed immunity. Wow.

So they're conservative to the point where they're like, COVID-19 shouldn't stop business and COVID-19 shouldn't shut stuff down, but not conservative enough to not hook up with the dudes. Especially in Hungary at the moment, because a lot of those, there's quite a few countries going quite conservative and quite right. Yeah, yeah. And they've really trampled on some rights lately.

Yeah. So he's married and he's got a daughter and he's like, look, I've been a good boy for 30 years. I've devoted myself to this cause. So please just kind of evaluate my misstep. My misstep. You don't, that's not your first step, is it? Just all of a sudden appearing at an orgy.

That's not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't climb Everest on your first time. 25 strong. You don't put on crampons and climb Everest, you know. No. No. But I love that the police did a press conference and quote,

they said, we interrupted a gangbang. Gee, you got a war here, I just took a drink. Born out of a mouthful of coffee. I feel like, I feel like. I love when these. Should have been a bit. Yeah, I love when these right wing conservatives get done for stuff like this. Like, if they were just a bit more chill about things.

Yeah. But does it bum anybody else that, like, the. I'm sorry, I'm just an essential word there. There's a poor choice of words. Does it bum anybody else out... Yeah. Yeah. ...that these like conservative peoples have a more wild sex life than you?

Like I consider myself quite liberal and progressive, but I've never been in a 25-person predominantly male-strong orgy. Never. Never even come close to it. Well, Yosef would say you're missing out. Yeah, he would. Yeah. I've been a good boy for 30 years.

And his wife's like, 30 years is a long time. He deserves a little blowout. ZM's Fletch Warner-Megan, the podcast. A statistic that will come as no surprise to anybody, but New Zealand travellers overseas spending in the last quarter, like traditionally the winter overseas holiday time that we all go overseas,

fell almost $1.7 billion. Wow, that's how much we spend on holidays overseas or when we're on holidays overseas in that September quarter. So that is probably part of the reason. Because I read yesterday that the New Zealand, what is it, GDP? Is that what the GDP? Yep, gross domestic.

I don't know. I mean, it's a thing. Only fell 3% this year. It's on target to only fall 3%. Because we've all stayed at home and spent money. Yeah, which is significantly better than what was forecast and also like way better than a lot of other countries because of that initial lockdown.

So New Zealand travellers and students while overseas dropped 84% to $324 million. So there's still Kiwis overseas spending $324 million. But would that be like Kiwis are doing their OE and have like a credit card here and pay it off? Maybe. Or overseas buying. Does that count?

Nah, because that's a different stat, I think, isn't it? Oh, okay. Unless it is overseas. It doesn't elaborate on that. But yeah, crazy. It's just depressing, isn't it? It is. Yeah, it is.

Not long. I wonder how many, I'd like to see the breakdown of what percentage is spent by the top percent. Do you know what I mean? The top percentage is spending the most percent.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The top 10% what they spend versus like the bottom 50%. You know how those stats are always, because some people go on overseas holidays and they're not doing them this summer where they go skiing or whatever. So they're like, oh, well, maybe we'll just buy a new car instead.

And they buy themselves like a European, brand new European car that's like $150,000. I'm like, so you're telling me if you'd gone on holiday, you would have spent $150,000 on holiday? No, no, that's nuts. We're living wildly different holidays. We are living wildly differently. I don't think they're doing three-star motel slash Airbnbs.

No. These people. Well, they're Airbnb maybe, but they're doing the posh one. Well, that's what they've said. The low numbers coincide with New Zealanders spending more on nesting at home and buying things like furniture and hardware and cars. Yeah. Well, that's good.

We're keeping ourselves going. I'm trying to find a silver lining. With all the essentials, like new European cars. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Charlie Brooker's Black Mirror series and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Charlie Brooker's Black Mirror series was very, very popular. Once it hit Netflix, I think it was level,

was it season three that was on Netflix? And then they went back to season two and one. What do you mean? Well, I feel like it didn't really hit its popularity straps until season three because it had just been a BBC show and then Netflix bought it. And then everybody delved into the, like the first episodes of Black Mirror were out there.

Yeah, yeah. When they were made, very much so. But they've been questioned, or he's constantly questioned whether or not he's going to do another one. And he's like, I think this year's been enough. However, it's Hugh Grant that let slip.

This was with New York Magazine when he was doing an interview about the undoing. Oh, I had a lot of messages of it because we talked about that the other day. I just finished that on Neon. People messaging and saying, I heard you talk about this whodunit show. What is it? The Undoing.

The Undoing on Neon. So good. It's only like six eps, so super easy to binge. So in that interview, he said Charlie Brooker has written, when asked what he's going to be doing next. Right. Charlie Brooker's written a mockumentary about 2020 for Netflix. And Hugh Grant will be playing a historian

who's being interviewed about the year. I'm pretty repellent, actually. And you'll like my wig. Okay. Did he say too much? That was all that he said. I wonder when that's going to come out then. Because Charlie Brooker, when I first heard of Charlie Brooker,

he was doing a show called The Weekly Wipe, and it was brilliant. He's a genius, yeah. He's very, very smart. And then when he got really popular and obviously was getting paid more for smaller products, projects rather, he didn't need to do one every week, so he did the yearly wipe. Yeah. And it was so good. It was a look back on the year. So I wonder't need to do one every week. So he did the yearly wipe.

Yeah. And it was so good. It was a look back on the year. So I wonder if he'll do one this year because they always come out just before Christmas. Yeah. And they're just this scathing look at the year that's been. But we all lived it.

Maybe we don't need the scathing look back at the year. I wonder if he is doing one though. I might actually Google that and see if he is because... It's worth a Google if you can find it. Yeah. It's normally, like you say, is in the UK. I wonder if he is doing one though. I might actually Google that and see if he is because it's worth a Google if you can find it. Yeah. Like you say, he is in the UK. But yeah, so no word on a release. Because did it sound like Hugh Grant said

he'd filmed it or was filming it? He said he'd written for Netflix. Yeah, he said he'd written it. But then he said he didn't like my wig. So he obviously knows what it's going to look like. But then he had a wig. Yeah, he said he'd written it. But then he said, you don't like my wig. So he obviously knows what it's going to look like. But then he had a wig. Sounds like he's acted in it already.

But you wouldn't release something about 2022 late into next year, would you? No, because we all want to move on from this shit. Yeah. So maybe they'll drop it

just after New Year, maybe. Yeah. Perhaps. What a nice Christmas watch. Just to relive the year. Lovely. A little recap. ZM's F watch. Just to relive the year. Lovely. A little recap. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. Man has received an exit survey from a rendezvous. Now, I've never had an exit survey mostly come from employers, right? When you leave a job. So you leave a job and they say,

look, how can we do better as a company? And you're in the departure lounge, you're leaving, you don't care. You might be leaving because you hated the place and it's an inconvenience of your time. We've had one, Vaughan, haven't we?

An exit survey? Yeah. It was a phone call from HR at our last place. If you're leaving, like, I wouldn't want to ask them. Yeah, I was just like, I was just like, oh, yeah. I can't remember. So I'm going to tell you how to be a better company. I'm leaving this one to work against you.

Why would I tell you how to do better? Like, if you can't read. So I'm going to tell you how to be a better company? I'm leaving this one. To work against you. Why would I tell you how to do better? Like if you can't read between the lines. No, but that's your chance to tell them what they did wrong, right? They should know what they did wrong. No, it's like when you're angry at your partner and they're like, have I done something wrong? Well, have you done something wrong? Could you tell me what I've done wrong so I don't do it again?

I think you should just know what you've done wrong. So this was after a rendezvous and this is quite funny. So not a relationship, a one night stand. It seems like it. He was casually seeing. So this is Niall from Cornwall. Okay. He was casually saying. So this is Niall from Cornwall. Okay. He received this exit survey and the survey

starts with thanks for the shag. Now rate the experience. Thank you. Oh wow. Oh it was just a shag. Yeah. They say casually saying. That word is so horrible. So horrible. This is from a female,

Lily. Okay, yep. But it's the UK, so... Yeah. Yep. So Lily starts, the first question is, how attractive did you find Lily? She's got one to ten. One is ooh, what was I thinking? And ten is wow, wow, wow. Why would you need this like...

Why would you want this? It's like seeing nasty comments online. But then I think it kind of showcases her personality. She seems quite funny. Yeah. Next question was, how would you rate Lily's personality? One to ten again. Absolute snore fest up to immaculate vibes.

Immaculate vibes. That's a cool way of describing yourself. Yeah. And then the last question is, what is Lily's best feature? In brackets, it's okay to objectify me here, by the way. Right. Did you leave out questions about the performance in bed? Or was there none of that?

Was there none of that? Oh, I don't believe she... Oh, no. Snorefest. Yeah. I wanted to know if she was a Snorefest or whether she was good. A freak between the sheets.

Yeah. One to ten. That's so... What if you've really got an honest answer? She's obviously got a bit of confidence. Exactly, unless you're confident you're going to get good answers, right? But even if you're confident

and someone comes back with a one or a two, that's going to rock you. Yeah. I just like to live in ignorant bliss. Niall's sexual prowess. Yes, of my sexual prowess. This guy Niall shared it and said, I can't believe I sleep with a psychopath. But I'm hoping he's kidding because I think it's quite

funny. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think that's psychotic. No. I just think it's quite funny. Yeah. It's sort of a laugh. Probably get you a second date if she maybe gave it to him because she was into a second date. Yeah. This would just like confirm it, right? Chill out, Nigel. Niall. Niall.

Who's like 22-year-old Nigel? There'll be a 22-year-old Nigel out there. He'll be doing alright for himself. Okay. What did you say? How did you describe his personality? Immaculate vibes. Immaculate vibes, yeah.

Maybe he's not immaculate vibes Nigel, but, you know, he's not a starfish. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the top six. Just googling a saying Megan just said. What was it again? You weigh publicity, you don't read it. So it's like saying it doesn't matter if it's good or bad. We were just making fun of somebody.

You don't read your reviews, you weigh them. Yeah, how many you get. You don't read what they say. It's all about how many people are talking about you, not what they're saying. God, that's a terrible approach to life. Isn't it? I mean, what if everybody hates you?

What a terrible way to live. Yeah. Anyway, today's top six is completely unrelated. Top six ways we can nearly kill Richie McCourt to promote New Zealand tourism. Yesterday, he jumped out of a plane. Now, we did this recently too. Yeah, I don't want to. I mean, I'm not comparing them, Remote New Zealand Tourism. Yesterday he jumped out of a plane. Now, we did this recently too. Yeah, I don't want to, I mean, I'm not comparing them,

but ours was way cooler. We jumped out the back of a military plane. Yeah, I think Richie McCourt even would have been more jazzed up for this. Yeah. For jumping out the back of the Hercules, which flew over the house yesterday when it was watering the plants. I know, you're going to do that every time it flies over. You've seen a photo to the group chat.

Yep. We jumped out of that. That us. That us. That's what I'm going to do that every time it flies over? You sent a photo to the group chat. Yep. We jumped out of that. That us. That us. That's what I'm going to say. That us. So he jumped out of it, applying beautiful photos, but I didn't see the media doing backflips when we did it the other week.

I think you did enough backflips for the media. Yeah. I can't quite see the difference between us and Richard McCall. No. I don't remember you winning a World Cup. Similar. I've won a World Cup. I don't want to go on about it. Playing with

yourself World Cup. And you put up a good fight in the final. Good from you. But you still made the final. Yeah. Megan's lazy one o'clock Harry Styles Those sorts of numbers are rookie numbers You've got to pump it up

One when you get home One at one o'clock Couple more before bedtime You're not getting anywhere with that kind of attitude It's for prostate health The top six ways we can nearly kill Richie McCaw to promote New Zealand tourism. Number six, what about a

drive down a rocky canyon in a super fast jet boat at break net speed? Yeah, great. Yeah, Bree and Clint did that yesterday on their tour around New Zealand. Oh, it's an amazing shot over. It's just incredible. Bree didn't look like she agreed. Number five on the list of the top

six ways we can nearly kill Richard McCaw to promote New Zealand tourism. Let's throw him off a bridge with a rubber band loosely tied around his ankle. And to add to it, why not make it a historic bridge as well? One that you're like, hmm, how long has that got? Number four on the list of the top six ways

we can nearly kill Richard McCaw to promote New Zealand tourism. I'm boring to death on the Northern Explorer from Auckland to Wellington. That's mean. I felt mean writing it. I felt even meaner saying it. It's a beautiful train journey. It's got some really picturesque parts.

It does. If you get a lovely drive through the central plateau, looking up and seeing those mountains. Don't you think you're being sarcastic? Nah. And if you're your mix sarcastic? Nah. And if you're like me, if you're a bit of a fan of civil engineering feats, the Rarimu spiral. The spiral, yeah.

How will we get over this giant hill? Let's go around a few times. I didn't do a great job of explaining that. Number three on the list of the top six ways we can nearly kill Richie McCord to promote New Zealand tourism. Swing him face first into the abyss of a huge prehistoric looking canyon.

Yeah, good idea. Yeah, the old canyon swing. The thing about it is, bungee jumping, you're like, well, if it all goes badly, I've got a chance because I'll be falling into the water. Canyon swing.

If it all goes badly, I stand no chance because I'm doing this into a rocky cliff face. Yeah. Number two on the list of the top six ways we can nearly kill Richie McCaw to promote New Zealand tourism. Put him in an inflatable plastic bag and half fill it with water and roll him down a hill. Now, that sounds like a surefire way to suffocate yourself, doesn't it? But the Zorb people have made a lot of money off it. Yeah.

And made it a lot safer. Yeah. Well, not really. It's still just an inflatable plastic bag full of water. I think that's one of money off it. Yeah. And made it a lot safer. Yeah. Well, not really. It's actually just an inflatable plastic bag full of water. I think that's one of my favourite things to do, the Zorb or the Ogo. Yeah. So good. It is so fun.

Ogo, yeah. Ogo was the Zorb people after they sold the Zorb and sent it to Zorb people. Lovely, lovely people. We've met them. We won't. We won't do Zorbs again, no way. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, fingers crossed. Come back and do Ogo. So much fun. Great nudge, nudge, fingers crossed. Come back.

So much fun. Great fun. Can you buy those for personal use? Question. If you've got the money, why not? Answer. Okay, good. They're probably pretty expensive.

Yeah, or else I'd probably find a stick when I was going down the hill to stab myself. Well, yeah, their hill is specially made. You could just definitely chuck one in Mission Bay or like a harbour and go for a... I reckon I'd get blown out to sea, though. I reckon Wellington... How embarrassing would that be? The host guard have to rescue me.

The wind changes and then you're heading out the opening of the harbour. Before you know it, you're washing up in Blenheim. But it would be good fun because the inter-islander ferry could bump you along. Yeah, great. Bump you along on the right way. And number one on the list of the top six ways we could nearly kill Richard McCaw to promote New Zealand tourism. Get him to drink one of every wine made in New Zealand. Yeah, great idea.

He'd be well on his way there. And that's today's top six. It's a special day today. It is producer Gerard's birthday. Happy birthday. It is producer Jared's birthday. Happy birthday. Oh, thanks, guys. I got to work and didn't say happy birthday to you because I didn't know it was your birthday.

I thought you were going to lie. I was about to say Fletch came in and had no idea it was your birthday, but I did. How did you know? Because... I knew because the email that went around last night to say what everybody would like to put forward to be on the show tomorrow. It said Jared's birthday at the top.

Of Sarah. Of Mounties. Yeah, I missed that. But it's an ominous birthday because you are in the 27 Club. Yep, hanging out with Kurt Cobain. Now this is for those that don't know. Amy Winehouse. Yeah, Amy Winehouse.

For those that don't know, the 27 Club are all of these celebrities who died on their 27th year. I thought there was more. Isn't there like 10? There's not a huge amount. I thought Heath Ledger was afterwards. Heath Ledger was after. How old was Heath Ledger? He was 29.

Oh, okay. He was in his 29th year. I thought he was in the 27th. Miley Cyrus is 28 now, but she said that's why she wanted to get sober because she didn't want to join the 27 club. But now she's 28, she'll cut loose. Most of the big names joined in one year. Jimi Hendrix,

Janis Joplin and Jim Morrison, Jim Morrison of the Doors. Were they all 27? They were all 27 and they all died in either 1970 or 1971. So in a 12 month period, that's when most of them joined. And then some rock and roll dudes like the guy from The Grateful Dead,

Kurt Cobain and Amy Winehouse. All in the 27. Those are the musicians that were in the 27 Club. River Phoenix? Yeah, that's true, actually. Was he in the 27 Club? That was the musicians there that I was reading. Yeah, because he's an actor. Jim Morrison, yeah, I mentioned him from The Doors.

Amy Winehouse mentioned... Yeah, I don't know if River Phoenix was 27. Born 1970 and died 1993. I can't do maths. Is that 27? Yes. So, yes. Oh, okay, there's lots more people. The one I was reading was just

the musicians. Anton Yelich, you know the guy... Do you remember before, Megan, when I said, So yes. Oh, okay. There's lots more people. The one I was reading was just the musicians. Just the music, yeah. Oh, Anton Yelich. Do you remember before, Megan, when I said, Vaughn, you've got enough time now to research who's in the 27 Club. Finally, I read the article. The definitive list of members of the 27 Club. And what did Vaughn say in response?

Yeah, easy. Easy. Easy. Anton Yelich, you know the Russian guy that was in Star Trek? Yes. Do you remember? That's horrible. That was horrible. That was horrible. He's one of those people I always forget passed away.

He got pinned. Didn't he get pinned by a car? Yeah. In his driveway. That's right. Yeah, there's a few rappers in the list. I don't want to bring it down on your birthday. Yeah.

Yeah, good luck, Jared. Good luck. Cheers, guys. Have you thought about wearing a helmet on? It's not just today, is it? Do you have to wear a helmet all year? The whole year, yeah. Just in case you get a...

I hadn't considered that. A fall? I probably wouldn't consider that. But most of these are drug overdoses, and I don't think a helmet's going to stop the drugs from... Yeah, okay, big goal. Imagine if drugs are like, no, we can't. He's wearing a helmet.

He's got a helmet on. We'd better just jump back out. I was just thinking it's just for the one day on your birthday but it's no just the whole year yeah yeah just be careful please jared all right we'll do 365. now how long have you been uh with your girlfriend for because she's gonna have to buy your present today that's an interesting point um two weeks almost two weeks yeah yes i do you think she should bother? I personally think she should. Okay. But are you holding up, like, expectations for a grand present?

Because it's two weeks. Nah. Okay, good. Nah. Yeah. I'm pretty low-key. Well, you have to tell us what she gets you now so we can all rate it. If it's appropriate.

Oh. Okay, pulled a Megan there where you went all gross. Fleshforn and Megan there where you went all gross. Dating and online dating and dating apps all up the wazoo this year. It's a bit weird because there's been lockdown and stuff. There's a couple of new dating terms that have been chucked out there. They are kind of polar opposites.

So the first one is carpe diemers. So carpe diem is seize the day. Seize the day. So carpe diemers are seizing the day with a diem. Yes. So basically, these are the people who have taken 2020 to be like, okay, we've got no time to muck around. And they are getting straight to the point.

They're sliding in and being like, should we go on a date? Chat. Right. Is that not just already all guys? But apparently not. No, not so much going on a date. Right.

Okay. Oh, right. Okay. Yeah. And as soon as one ends, they're back in there being like, do you want to go? Should we go on a date?

Just absolutely sliding in a date. Not mucking around with too much banter. Yeah. What was that other old term a while back, a submariner, where like a guy would pop up and then you might go on a date with them and then they go. Dive, dive. Whoop, whoop. And then they disappear off radar.

And then you don't see them for six months and then they submarine and submerge again. Or re-emerge. And the next one is hybridators. So this is the opposite of Carpe Diemers, hybridators. So they are using lockdown to its full potential and like a lot of people were laying the groundwork and taking it slow and like getting into conversation and getting to know people and using lockdown as like,

oh, we actually can't meet just yet to keep the conversation flowing. They're quite liking the fact that they don't have to meet people. Yeah. And that they can be online chatting. That would be me if I was online dating just to like chat, really make sure you want to meet them.

But then what if you're wasting all these lockdown months and then you meet them and you're just like, nah. Because you know in person it's different. What else are you going to be doing in lockdown? I don't know. Waste away. Watching Netflix. Eating. You do that at the same time.

Yeah. Watch Netflix and do the DMs. But yeah, hyperdaters, completely opposite to carpe diem is. Right. Two new dating terms out of 2020. Alright, next on the show we're going to play Audio Ninja Warrior. So if you would like to play, we need two contestants right now.

Yeah. You've just got to make your way through the Audio Ninja Warrior course by making sound effects. Yeah, if you fancy yourself as a bit of a sound effects machine, this is the one for you. We time you. It's the quickest one through. So we'll give you a sound effect, for example, an ATM machine.

And you'd go... Unless you're that one in Wellington that got smeared with faeces, and then you're like, oh, God, oh, no, oh, what are you doing? Why are you waving that on me? ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fletch Vaughan and Megan's Audio Ninja Warrior.

Well, it's just like the TV show Ninja Warrior, except you don't need to be ripped. You don't need to be athletic. You just need to make your way through the Audio Ninja Warrior course by making sound effects. We'll give you the sound effect. You do it. You then proceed to the next sound effect,

and the person that can get through the obstacle course the fastest is our winner. Hannah is our first contestant. Good morning, Hannah. Good morning. Now, you're going to be up against Zach, who is going into the Cone of Silence. So he won't be able to hear the sound effects. He won't have an advantage. How are you with your sound effects?

Are you confident? Yeah, I'm pretty confident. Okay, good. Well, Vaughn Smith, you are our... Yes, let me just get my clock ready. Oopsie, I pressed calculator. Who else does that? You're going to set the alarm in the morning.

It doesn't wake you up. Every time. Because you entered 440 on the calculator. Yeah. Silly. That happens. All right, I'm ready. Okay.

Are you ready? Yes. Are you ready, Hannah? Here we go. I am ready. A self-serve checkout. Ding. That'll do.

A golf course timed sprinkler. That was good. Oh, yes. That was good. Really good. An emergency vehicle of your choice. That was cute. Christmas music over a speaker in a mall.

Silent night. That was a good one. That was a good one. And what Richard McCall would have heard skydiving? Wah! I've done it! That'll do. They were hard. They were, yeah.

Good sound effects today. Brilliant, Hannah. All right. All right, well, we're just going to put you into the cone of silence now, Hannah. And we welcome Zach to Audio Ninja Warrior. Good morning, Zach. Hey, how's it going? Good, mate. Good. Alright, so we've got an

audio obstacle course for you. Uh-huh. The same course that Hannah went through, but you don't know because you didn't hear it. And your time starts now. Self-serve checkout. Yep, yep, that'll do. I like that. A golf course timed sprinkler. Oh, yes.

Oh, it's a slow one. That's one of those ones chucking long bits of water. An emergency vehicle of your choice. Oh, yes. Air raid sites are my ball. Yeah, good. Christmas music over a speaker at a mall. Wow.

Yeah, that was good. That was good. Elevator music. Yeah. And what Richie McCall would have heard skydiving? Richie McCall, was it? He went skydiving. What would he have heard?

Ah! I've done it! Yes! All right, okay. Zach, we're going to bring in Hannah. Hannah and Zach, it was very, very close. Two seconds in it. Do you know what, Zach?

I think you stalled too long at the Christmas music. And the hesitation at Richie McCaw's skydiving cost you because it was only two seconds. Zach, you got 50 seconds. Hannah, you got 48 seconds. Congratulations. You are today's Audio Ninja Warrior. By two seconds, I think that's our closest ever Audio Ninja Warrior.

Very, very close. Congratulations. Never hesitate. Never just get straight in. There's no room for hesitation on the Audio Ninja Warrior field. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Am I a bad person?

But right now, it's a Christmas predicament for someone who's contacted the show. A Christmas situation from a guy. It says, as if Christmas wasn't stressful enough,

dot, dot, dot. Okay. Can I just stop you there? You've got some glitter on your forehead. Oh yeah, Vaughan's got some on his nose.

Where did it come from? Oh, it's Christmas. All this bloody tinsel. Everywhere in here. I told you, it's too much Christmas in here. I like the glitter on my forehead. But tinsel's different to glitter. it's Christmas. All this bloody tinsel. Everywhere in here. I told you it's too much Christmas in here. I like the glitter on my forehead. But tinsel's different to glitter.

I don't know. You've been sniffing the baubles. I do love Christmas. I know you do. Okay. As if Christmas wasn't stressful enough. Dot, dot, dot. I have been with my girlfriend for nine months and things are going really well. She's amazing in every way. And this isn't about our relationship. It is about my ex.

So my ex and I went out for three years before we split up because we knew we were just better apart. There wasn't a massive argument or anything like that. And so we're still pretty friendly. Here comes the issue. My ex and I have, ever since we were together, given each other presents at Christmas time, even after we broke up. Right. But this is my first Christmas with my new partner and now it's come time for me to buy my ex a present.

My girlfriend really doesn't want me to. She doesn't understand why I would even want to, even though I've tried to explain that we are just mates now. She wants to know what all the presents were in the past and is just really against the whole tradition. So how many years, do they have how many years they've been split up? No. How many Christmases have they not been together

where this present thing's happening? No, I don't know that. Did you say how long they've been split up? No. How many Christmases have they not been together where this present thing's happening? No, I don't know that. Did you say how long they'd been together, the previous relationship? Three years. Okay. So that's substantial. And they're friendly and amicable split and stuff.

Yeah, right. So if they were together three years, and let's say they broke up last year, so last year was the first Christmas where they weren't together, but they were friendly, so they did a present, and then he said nine months, so he got with a new girlfriend in like March.

Yep. And then so this will be the first Christmas that he is both with girlfriend and not with, and not being single. Yeah. But he got her a present last year. I would have just got her a present and not told the new girlfriend. No, because then you... No.

Then you look like you've got something to hide. But as someone who's friends with exes, it's like, this isn't weird to me and I don't see a problem with this. Well, he does say... The glitter on your forehead's back now. It's just catching the light. Yeah. He says, am I a bad person?

I love my girlfriend. And it doesn't sound, he sounds like he loves her lots and it's going swimmingly. But I don't want to give up on this old tradition with my ex. Because they're friends. Nah, it's not a tradition.

You got her presents when you were together and then last year at a dinner, you got her a present because you found the need to be a friend. Yeah, but you're assuming it was one year. It could have been a couple of years that he was doing it. I just invented the fact.

I just put that in there. Also, you can understand how it would be awkward for him to talk to his friend, his ex, and be like, hey, I can't do this anymore because my girlfriend. Yeah. But then if I was his girlfriend, I absolutely would not want him to do that either. Has this friend also been around? Because it sounds like, how much is this friend involved on a friendship level with them as a new couple? Yeah, because if she was involved, maybe

you wouldn't feel as threatened. Yeah. If she was there day to day, if you hung out, but if you don't see her and then he's just randomly gets to Christmas and buys her something, that does look a bit... But then why is he trying to keep them apart? Why does he want to not, like, involve them in each other's lives?

That seems fishy. They're exes, Megan. Yeah, but there's history. They once, like, cared a lot about each other. They loved each other. This just shows everybody inserts themselves

into the situation. Yeah, yeah. Fletcher's friends with the ex is just like, that's fine, but Megan's like... Also not getting presents. No, but I've just never been really friendly like that with an ex.

So it's hard to understand. But yeah, Keem's not what everyone else thinks. So this is how Am I a Bad Person works. What do you think? Is he a bad person for buying his ex a present when his girlfriend doesn't want him to? Maybe you've been in the situation where you are friends with an ex

and a new partner hasn't known how to deal with that. They can still be friends, right? But like a present, like what is he planning on buying her? There's a whole lot of categories. What's he buying? Is that just like some silly, cheap, throwaway, trinkety thing?

Yeah, or is it? Or is it some serious investment? All right, well, 0800DARLS.N, what do you think? Is he a bad person for buying the ex a present while he's got the new girlfriend? Maybe you've been in a similar situation. You can share some advice. So we've got a guy who has a new girlfriend for nine months, but he has this tradition with his ex that he was with for three years

where they buy each other presents. The new girlfriend is not keen. Somebody said, I've been watching The Crown and this just screams Princess Diana and Camilla Parker Bowles. Yeah. And we all know that didn't end well. No, poor Camilla Parker Bowles. That bracelet, eh? God damn it. You guys aren't watching it, eh?

No. I'm still behind. It's on the list. Rick, what do you think? Bad person? Hey, initially, guys, he's not a bad person. But, you know, with the new partner, she's not going to accept that one bit. And he really needs to take her side and think about her feelings, right? Aw, that's so nice, Rick. I mean, how much does a present really mean to him? He could just, like like stop doing the present,

still be friends with her and save the new partner's feelings. Well, do you know what? I just heard this and I'm sitting at the Urban Bakehouse here in Plymouth in Wellington where they've got some beautiful food, guys. Wait, is this a shameless plug for your cafe? Yeah, I'm sitting here just about to have

a beautiful panini. Crack, crack, Rick, Rick, Rick. We're giving this away for free. No one's going to buy the cow if we're giving the milk away for free. I love that Rick has called up for a shameless plug and seamlessly dropped the plug for the cafe. Former cafe owner, I appreciate that so much. He was driving down

a... Shush, Rick. So what are you, lovely paninis? He was driving down a smooth road of opinion and then we hit the jutter bar of plug. Not bad, eh? Not bad. Bloody hell, Rick. I must take my hat off to you. I didn't see you coming.

Love you guys. Thank you for the mornings. It's brilliant. Oh, thank you. You can't. Yeah, exactly. Bloody Urban Bakehouse and their fantastic paninis. All right. Well, give us a call.

What do you think? Is he a bad person? Tom Sainsbury. Am I a bad person? All right. So you've just joined us quickly to recap. It's a Christmas predicament,

a present predicament. So a guy has a girlfriend for nine months. Things are going well. She's amazing. But his ex-girlfriend and him, they were together for three years and they buy each other Christmas presents. Even though they're not together now, the new girlfriend does not like it.

Would you say people are split on this or are people leaning more one way? Oh, no, people are definitely leaning one way. Grace, what do you think? Is he a bad person? Hey guys, I reckon that he's not a bad person but the tradition needs to go.

It's time to create new memories with new person and let the tradition go. That's a good way of looking at it. He isn't saying you cannot be friends with her. It's just the gift buying's a bit weird. And sure, she was special at one point in time, but, you know, obviously there's a new person that's come in

who is giving him all the attention and care in the world. Why does he really need the ex to hang around and get that from her? Just let her go, let her move on with her life, and you move on with yours. Yeah. I mean, I tend to agree with yours. Yeah, well said. Thanks, Grace. Sarah, what do you think? Bad person? No.

No. Yeah, I don't think he's a bad person at all. I think that they have a really nice friendship. I want to know why the current girlfriend doesn't like it. Because it's just a gift. I mean, unless it's just, it's just a gift.

I mean, unless it's a really inappropriate gift or maybe he's spending too much time with her, like, where, like, where is her questioning coming from and why doesn't she like it? Are you, are you friends with an ex? Yes. It's interesting because everyone that's saying he's not a bad person has a friendship with an ex. And so they understand the relationship. Yeah.

Yeah, whereas I don't. I mean, so my current partner, he has met my ex. He, you know, he shook his hand. He's met at my parents. Like, my ex has even stayed at my parents' house when he's come up and visited. Like, you know, like, my current partner knows that i'm not with my ex and there's no threat of me leaving him for him or anything like that but he understands

that we had time together you know we're still friends we ended really well like it's not you know we don't fight or anything so but you don't buy each other presents um well he has he's brought me presents um i've brought him stuff Not necessarily for Christmas Because I'm in the belief That Christmas isn't just a time for gifts It's a time for sending the family and stuff Like I'm not a huge gift person But he sent me like bunches of flowers and everything

Wow Megan's like no way I think you're quite a bit more mature than me Yeah true Hey Sarah thanks for your call Some text messages I have a friendship with an ex and I still wouldn't do that. No to bad person. Yes to being friends

but no to presents. Would he be as supportive if his current girlfriend was buying somebody else presents? An ex presents? That's what I always try and do, like when someone has an issue, put yourself in their shoes and think if you'd find it weird. From the other side.

Someone said, does he buy all of his long-term friends presents? If not, this one can be nipped in the bud. Yeah. Yeah, because that makes it a little bit special, which you don't want them to have anything special with their ex. You don't want anything special apart from with me.

All right, it's four minutes away from eight. Coming up, your chance to win. Are we giving away cash today? How's the economic situation? Yeah, let's do minutes away from eight. Coming up, your chance to win. Are we giving away cash today? How's the economic situation? Yeah, let's do it. $100 cash with, I bet I can guess your mum's name. Vaughan's going to try and guess your mum's name after asking five questions. Yeah, five.

We haven't done this for a while. You're on a hot streak. Yeah, that's why we haven't done it for a while. The accounting department was like, hey, hot streak smithy. Actually, they took me to the casino and they made me blow on the dice. Yep. And then they were using the company money to gamble. And we're in a good state.

I blew some lucky sevens there. Okay. I didn't know that's how the accounting department works. But they do, right. Yeah, they gamble with the company's money. We won big. Okay. Christmas bonus is big.

Oh, brilliant. Okay. For me, because I'm the lucky blower. Okay. We're one big Okay but Christmas bonus is big Oh brilliant Okay well your chance For me because I'm the lucky blower Okay ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast Hey you on the phone

I bet I can guess your mum's name Just having a cough there Did you guys see Lotto last night? No What? Did you guys see Lotto last night? No. What? Did you guys see Lotto last night? What, the draw on TV?

Yeah. Do they still do that? Yeah, but they're doing it 20 past 8 now. Not 8. And I don't know why there's been the 20 minute change. I don't watch normal 10. I wouldn't get that in for you. But just to fit in the ad break maybe.

Oh, okay. Sonia Gray, gosh, she could hardly speak. She had such a croaky voice. Okay. I said she's going to need to address this before the end of the Lotto ad. Everyone's going to freak out, she could hardly speak. She had such a croaky voice. Okay. I said, she's going to need to address this before the end of the Lotto ad. Everyone's going to freak out that she's got COVID. And she said, I'm off to have a cup of tea.

It's just a raspy throat. So I think that she's probably had to dongle up the schnoz just to make sure it wasn't COVID. But she's very croaky. Are you? What does this have to do with anything? Yeah, I was like, are you wondering what the point of this is? Because I coughed to clear my throat before I was going to do this because this is the show's lotto. This is a tune-in moment.

Oh, my God. And I am the show's Sonia Gray. You would agree. Megan, you're ball 40. We're both aging. Why am I ball 40? Can't I be ball seven? You're the bonus ball.

Yeah, you're a bonus ball. Okay. They're better. Used to have a point, now kind of point. You're perfect. We welcome Chantal to I Bet I Can Guess Your Mum's Name. Good morning, Chantal. Good morning.

All right. Now, Vaughn is going to ask you five questions about your mum and then has 15 seconds to try and guess her name. If he can do that, $100 cash. And he's on a hot streak too. Is this three or four wins in a row? Stop keeping count. Because he's winning all the time.

Yeah, I'm like Lewis Hamilton at Formula One. It's a foregone conclusion. He's got COVID. Does he? Oh my God, stay on topic. Proving that even the fastest driver in the world can't outrun COVID. Okay, let's get into it. Chantel.

Yeah, because the phone screen's on the blitz, isn't it? It keeps sliding off the screen, Chantel. Alright, let's ask some questions. What's on the Christmas dinner menu if mum's putting Christmas dinner on? Mum loves a slow cooker

roast chicken. For Christmas? Yeah, well, she's a bit of a traditional. You've never heard of me. It's ham or turkey on Christmas for your traditions. But I mean,

I love a slow... I don't like turkey or ham, so she's got to cater to her fussy kids. Oh, you're fussy. Mum would probably love nothing more than a roast. Than a roast turkey. Interesting. But like, in the

slow cooker. Yeah, she did a test run last night. She did a test run. Just to make sure. I love it. But so what has she done previous years? You've just had to put up with. Well, it depends on the weather.

If it's real nice, we would have had a barbecue with the family. But she's always prepared for all weather because it's New Zealand after all. That's true. Your mum's got a rocky couple of backup plans on Christmas Day. I'm putting my mum's name down because my mum loves a slow cooker. Okay. Yep. I'm also going to put my nan's name down Because she's also a slow cooking runs in the family Okay

How old is your mum? My mum is 54 54 Okay She's quite young 50 somethings I know So we laugh at this Megan Megan, but he gets it. We laugh at his ways.

Madness. Does mum have a favourite Christmas movie? Oh, I would say she's probably a Love Actually fan. Really? Good woman, yes. This is just this, this, hmm, this is kind of like a bonus question. Like, who's her favourite male in that movie Do you know Like what does she

Oh Gotta love Colin Firth Colin Firth I thought she might be a Hugh Granter No Liam Neeson Oh Hugh Granter's a good one too Cause he's a good dancer you know Yeah

Yeah okay Yep What about Liam's accent Can't go wrong Oh That's what I always forget Liam Neeson's in Love Actually So good

With that little fella Of Love Actually who's his son. Yeah. Who was in Game of Thrones. Yep. He's in the chess show I'm watching. Oh, yeah. The Queen's Gambit. The Queen's Gambit.

He's like this legendary young chess dude. He wears a cowboy hat. He's actually older than he looks. Okay. Yeah, he is. I know. Yeah, he's got a moustache and this. And I was like, do you reckon that's real?

What's your mum's, what are your mum's siblings' names? She has one older brother called John. Okay. She's only one of two. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

Okay. Yeah, that's good. I've got that down there. And what's mum's Christmas tipple? Like, what would mum have a tree? She's a bubbles or a red, depending on the time of day again. You know, morning she'd do a bubbles, but she'd be settling with a red in the evening.

Does she not put orange juice in it? She doesn't make it a mimosa? No, she doesn't muck around. Yeah, she's straight into the champers. She's no wimp. Wow, okay, mum. Straight into the champers. I'm just goingimp. Wow. Okay, mum. She's straight into the champers. I'm just going to chuck that. Are those your five questions, Vaughn? I think so.

Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Alright, well, you've got 15 seconds now to guess Chantel's mum's name. Now, Chantel, if you hear your mum's name, yell out stop, that's my mum's name. Your time, Vaughn Smith, starts now. Okay, I've got Margaret, Nicola, Cam's name. Your time, Vaughan Smith, starts now.

Okay, I've got Margaret, Nicola, Camilla, Nicole, Susan, Wendy, Robin, Liz or Elizabeth, Christine, there's my mum, Alison, Paula, Judith. Yes, stop, that's my mum's name. Oh, my God. Which one? Judith? Paula.

Paula. Yeah, loves a slow-cooked chicken. A champers on Christmas morning. Woo-hoo. Colin Firth in love, actually. Wow, yeah. I was a bit skeptical. Well, that means you have activated the bonus name. And another $100 on the line.

I've just had the dad's name sent through to me, Vaughan, by Executive Intern Anya. Yes, interesting. One guess at the dad's name. Dean. Oh, is there a Paula? Paula. Paula Dean.

She's that chef that deep fries everything in butter, but then she also said the N word that time, and everyone's like, oh, you can't say that. Oh, no. Absolutely not. No. Leave the butter, and you get out of here. I feel like it's a D, though.

Darren. Warren. That's a popular dad's name from that time. Darren. I should actually stay out of this conversation. Well, you're saying it was a popular dad's name from that time. No, I'm not saying that at all. I said Darren is, but...

Oh, but you're saying... I'm not saying anything else. What are you feeling? I don't know, because in my mind, like the Paula now, the reason I wrote it down, she's who I picture. So I have a real hard time shaking who that... Okay.

She's with Murray. Paula and Murray. Paula and Murray. But I don't feel like it's Murray. That'd be too coincidental. Murray. Roger. Or you've got one guess. Roger. Don't it be Roger? Why wouldn't it be a Roger? I don't know. Paula and Roger. Don't it be Roger?

Why wouldn't it be a Roger? I don't know. It's just a few away. Puller and Roger. Okay. Puller and Roger. What's your show? Are you going to go down to Puller and Roger's?

That sounds good, eh? Puller's got a slow cooked chicken on. I don't know. Bloody Roger will be watching the rugby, no doubt. Yeah, see, that sounds good. Okay. I'm going with Roger. Chantel.

Wait. No. You can't change it now, she is. I will say that you got the first letter right, didn't you, Chantel? Yes, got the first two letters right. Oh, R-O. R-O. Ah, Roy.

Yes. Paula and Roy Well Chantel $100 cash Congratulations And say Merry Christmas to your mum Paula From us And Roy

You tell them to have a ham and a turkey and bugger the kids Well if you haven't been on social media for the last day and a bit, you may have missed out the fact that everybody's sharing their Spotify wrapped playlist. It's an absolute master play from the Spotify marketing department. Towards the end of the year, they do this every year. It gives you a little rundown on your stats. I was kind of upset because when I went to bed last night,

I still hadn't had mine. I swear I didn't got it on my app. I couldn't get mine on the app. I just Googled Spotify wrapped and then clicked the link and it opened it. Oh, right. Because it was there this morning. And I was like, huh, but it's too late now

because everyone in the country has done it. And I'm too late. Yeah. Yeah. I share my Spotify with the children. And this is your issue, is that you're- Well, no, it's better than, like, remember that year, like, my top three songs were Moana, Frozen.

Yeah. I think I had a baby shark. Yeah. In there as a joke. Now that your kids have got older, it's gone more mainstream, hasn't it? Oh, it's very mainstream. Yeah. My song of the year was Sunday Best, that Surfaces song.

I feelin' good, like I should. We listened to that a lot. That was always on. Really? Well, if it's your number one song, you must have. Yeah. Do you know Megan and I share the same number one artist? Take a stab at that one.

Harry Styles. Great album though. He's my number two. He's my number two. Yeah, that album is so good. Nothing to do with what he looks like. Just a really good album. You'd think I'd go home from work and listen to something else,

but nah, we'd go home. Still the same. The weird one was it said, what do you think your top decade was? Mine was 2000s Yeah Yeah same Did it tell you

What your top song From the time was No Oh maybe Mine was Boom Boom Pow By the Black Eyed Peas I don't know

Yeah I wasn't around For a lot of that Did it tell you What song you'd listen To the most Cause I listened To Watermelon Sugar 1,500 times. 1,500 times!

Whoa! I was like, that doesn't even count how many times I listen to it at work. And watch the music video. Oh yeah, that too. That doesn't count. That's a lot of time in my life dedicated to Harry. There's not even 1,500 days in the year for your 1 o'clock Harry Styles, which started the year as a 1 o'clock Jonas.

When did that song come out? And let's do some math for this. Oh, no, we don't need to break that down. It's a phenomenal amount of listening times. It is quite confronting. Okay, I'm trying to find. Okay, so that was released on the 15th of May, Vaughan, if you can bring up the calculator.

That's the start of the year. Megan, it's the fifth month of the year and the middle of the fifth month of the year. Oh, yeah. So that came out on the 15th of May. That's been 202 days since then. So how many times did you listen to it? Oh, my God.

1,500. This is very confronting. 1,500 exactly or? I think it was like 1,522. 22. 1,522. 22. 1,522. Divided by 222. Why are you saying it like it's drugs or something?

It's just Harry Styles. Seven and a half times a day. Oh, that's all right. Megan, that's 200 and something days. I committed a lot of time to. That's a year of vets, warrior. Was your own husband in your top five artists? Nobody hasn't put anything out recently, has he?

Yeah, that doesn't mean he doesn't have a back catalogue. Doesn't mean you shouldn't just play it in the lounge to give him some royalties, Megan. That does make sense because I'd get those in my bank account too, but... Do you get a shared... Do you get a shared royalty check? Well, our bank account's shared, so everything that he gets, I get.

So, yeah, that would make sense, actually. God, I'd just have it on loop. No, because they've done... It's a perpetual economic machine. They've stopped that. They've got an algorithm that doesn't count that. If you loop a song, they'll stop it. Well, could you make a three-song playlist

and just cycle through the three songs? Yeah, maybe. I mean, I'm not here to make you money, but that's how I'll be doing it. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day, day the man that started the Gillette Company. Oh, okay. Do you know much about this fellow? Gillette, the best a man can get.

Keep your hands off. Can I still say that now? Huh? I don't know. We'll know you because I don't think so. That'd be excluding 50% of the possible market of people who could be

buying their razors couldn't they? For their legs and such. And the best a woman can get secretly to shave her legs. In the shower and then when her husband asks she'll be like

no what are you talking about I've got my own razors to do that. So today's fact of the day I've got a little bit more information about the guy that started Gillette but the fact of the day is the've got a little bit more information about the guy that started Gillette.

But the fact of the day is the guy that started the Gillette company's name was King Camp Gillette. What? King. Was he a king? His first name was King. He was not a king. His parents called him King. Where was he from?

Because in New Zealand you're not allowed to call him King. He was born in America. You looked into it. You can't call him any title that needs to be earned. I know. Birthright or earned. Duke. You can't call them Dukes.

King, Queen. Lieutenant. What about Captain? Just anything from the pull-down menu when you're booking a flight within New Zealand, basically. No, you can't. No military titles. Yeah. Could you call them Doctor?

I don't know. Unless you've got a cat, because Major Murray Fluffington's allowed. Yeah, well, he's not. Do what you want with cats. He's not going to be able to commit much fraud using that. Well, I thought you meant he's not going to be able to command a military unit overseas. He could. If he put his mind to it.

The world's his oyster. Are you Googling if you can call? Oh, no. What were you Googling? I was working on the latest. The way you frantically turn back the screen instead of typing, I was, can you name your child Doctor in New Zealand? I doubt it.

I'm still as silly who would want to. I doubt it. Baby names banned in New Zealand. Yeah. List of declined names. Oh, in 2018. Oh, that's always sad because you're like, man, that poor kid was, the parent was going to call them like Satan.

Yeah. There was a, in 2018, there was a Duke that was turned down, an Allah, a Heaven Princess Star, a Hunter Rouge. Wait, wait, wait. Why is that? That's not a title. Heaven Princess Star.

Oh, Hunter. Hunter Rouge. I don't know. Is there something in Rouge? It looks Germany. Yeah. Hunter Rouge. I don't know. Is there something in Rouge? It looks Germany. Yeah. German-esque. Justice, but it's about J-A-H-stice.

Justice. Oh my God. Judge. There's another justice. J-U-S-T-Y-C-E. Judge. Yeah, you think you're skirting around it changing the spelling. They know.

And then one called Just Us. Like just. Mate, it's not a personalised play. This is an actual human's name. Six people tried to call their kid King. Just Us. Just Us? Like, just? Mate, it's not a personalised play. This is an actual human's name. Six people tried to call their kid King. Just Us. Just Us. Just Us.

Who's that? Just Us. What did you say? Did you say Justice? No, I said Just Us. How many are there? It's just me. But you said Just Us.

Yeah, it is Just Us. Just one of you then Just say just me No it's just us Go away King King with two eyes There were six people who tried to call their kids king in 2018

Really? In New Zealand Majesty Messiah Miss You can't call your kid miss Oh miss Prince Four attempts at prince Two at queen Majesty, Messiah, Miss. You can't call your kid Miss. Oh, Miss.

Prince, four attempts at Prince. Two at Queen. Six at Royal. And that's just the traditional spelling. There's also Royale. Yep. Two As. There's Royale as in like the French version of Royal.

There's Royal Bubs. What about Royalty? Because that's not a title. Correct. Royalty one. Royalty spelt as Royalty is spout. Three attempts at that. These are all turned down names. Royale.

So like Roy, but like the female version. So like Roy with an L on the end. Royale also declined. Three attempts at Saint, Sir, Sire. They were also turned down in 2018. But the guy that started Gillette is a king. But the guy that started the company Gillette that made the first disposable razors,

his first name was King and his middle name was Camp. Right. King Camp Gillette. Yeah. Okay. So that's an interesting thing to see next time you're in the razor aisle and you look at them and you're like, oh, guess what?

Wow, that's expensive. I'll just keep buying the cheap ones. $36 for foreheads. That's what you say to yourself. Yeah. Do they not want me to shave? So today's fact of the day is the guy that invented the disposable raise, his first name was King.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Ah, do, day, day. A woman overseas has just found out that her husband did not buy her an air purifier. The thing sitting on their coffee table going, buy her an air purifier. The thing sitting on their coffee table going, was not an air purifier. This is the most brilliant story. It was a PlayStation 5.

Because the PlayStation 5s are like white, aren't they? White and black or something? Yeah. Does it not say PlayStation on it visibly anywhere? I think it's got a PS. It's got the logo on the side. But PS isn't obvious. He might have put like a book against it.

He might have put something around it to. Yeah. Where was the controller? Was that hidden in the drawer or something? I don't know. But then he might have been just saying, I'm just still playing the PS4. I just got a new controller.

Oh, okay. Not knowing that he'd bought himself a PlayStation 5. And Megan's like, how can I get away with this for like shoes and dresses and clothing? They don't really double as anything else, do they? No. This is so, how long was she in the dark for? And how did she finally click? She clicked when, I guess after a while, the air wasn't any more purified.

But she didn't like look into it or like, I would have been like, it's a really big air purifier. Could we have got a smaller one? Well, how big are air purifiers? I don't know. Are they even a thing? Yeah. Or like dehumidifiers. We had one in our house growing up, but it was massive.

But that was ages ago, so I'm assuming they're small now. Yeah. Could totally be an air purifier. Yeah, I guess so. And you could be like, I empty it all the time. Don't worry about it. There's so much water in here. You don't need to.

I clean the filters and everything. Don't worry about it. But anyway, when she found out, she sold it. She was very angry. Oh, what? Yeah, this all came to light because the guy who ended up buying it, because it's so hard to get a hold of. Because I heard, I don't know what it's like in New Zealand,

but I was reading a story the other day. Like, apparently Australia is, like, out of them. Oh, yeah, they're all. You can't get one for Christmas. Super hard to get a hold of one. Yeah, unless someone's, like, scalping one they've got online. Yeah, well, that's why this one got so popular. And the guy buying it was like,

what's the story? And she said, oh, my husband told me it was an air purifier. If my husband told me that, I'd just have to be like, good on you, you can have it. You just couldn't be mad. Because you have to charge the remote, the controller, so he

would have needed to plug that into the air purifier at some stage. What would he have said that was. So he would have needed to plug that into the air purifier at some stage. What would he have said that was? I just would have said it's got a bonus USB charging. That's the monitor. That's the monitor to tell, you know, just to run a little bit of diagnostics on the air purifier to see what unnecessary

chemicals we're breathing in. I'd actually like to open up the phone lines now and see if you've ever snuck a purchase in from your partner, either by hiding it or just outright lying, Megan. I'm looking at you.

Yeah, I noticed that. I was looking away. Well, I just do the simple ones like you say it's been there forever. You take the tag off and say you've had it for ages and put it back on them for not noticing. Well, I'd love to as well hear from people that have snuck something past their partner

and to this day have still got away with it. Oh, yeah. Didn't you try to sneak a power tool? Many power tools. But they've all been... No, they're in the garage. You can hide them in the garage. I don't clean the spiders on that side of the garage,

so nobody goes there. But have you actually got away with a power tool purchase? All of them. Okay, so, right, we better not bring this up. Yeah. Well, no, she knows I've got power tools, but she doesn't know where they came from, how long I've had them.

How many. How many, what they do. How much they were. That's the good stuff. All right, well, whatever it is, clothes, power tools, what have you snuck past your partner as a big purchase? And bonus points if they still don't know to this day. Maybe because it's hanging in your wardrobe.

We won't tell. Or the garage, and they haven't seen it yet. Well, a woman, is it overseas, the UK? Or America? No, no, Taiwan. Oh, okay. Taiwan's where it happened. He snuck in a PS5 and told his girlfriend it was an air purifier.

Yeah. Which she believed for a while, but it's now been sold. When she found out, she sold it. So we want to know those purchases that you have snuck past your partner. And bonus points if they still don't know. Chloe. Hi. I purchased two new horses a couple of months ago and didn't tell hubby.

And he found out several weeks later when he started noticing the different colors of my horses on Facebook. Wow, he noticed on Facebook. Not in real life. That's attentive. So did you get rid of two other horses? Your original two horses? No, I just added to the herd and he didn't really count them until we noticed that they were all quite different colours.

And then he walks out and he's like, hold on, hold on. Hold on. And was he upset or? No, well, I got in trouble, but I still got them to this day. I mean, they're here now aren't they yeah it's better to ask for forgiveness isn't it

Chloe brilliant hey thanks for your call 10 minutes away from 9 you can text in 9696 someone said snuck a new 8 foot

Christmas tree in this season pretended it was the old one he didn't notice but then he said that box is in great condition and I said oh yeah my friend gave me their old box

to store it in because you know I remember how tatty our last one was. And he still doesn't know. Totally bought it. Totally bought it. Really? Wow. Talking about sneaking things past your partner.

Yeah. How'd you do it? Bonus points if still to this day they don't know that you managed to sneak it past them. Chelsea, what did you manage to sneak past the boyfriend? Hey, I got the new GHD and I told him I won it in Women's Day. Was this at the stage this year where Women's Day didn't exist for a while? No, like he didn't even, he was so stupid.

He was like, oh my God, babe, that's amazing. And he made me tell everyone at the pub and he'd be like, tell them about that CompuOne. Oh no! He'd be like, tell them about that Compu one. Oh, no. He'd be heartbroken if he found out. No, he still, well, he's actually my ex-boyfriend anyway, but he still to this day probably believes it. I was thinking that's a really good, we should run like a text,

you text a number and we reply with a congratulations on insert the. What do you need us to lie? Yes. Because you bought something. I mean, we're doing great work making strong, honest relationships. Yes, we know that. Hey Chelsea, thanks for your call. Desi, what did you purchase without your partner knowing? Kia ora, I purchased a

pair of $1,200 Christian Louboutin shoes. Oh, girl. How did you hide that? It's easy. You hide them in plain sight because I said they belonged to one of my daughters. Wow.

When does your daughter get $1,200 for shoes from him? Oh, yeah, yeah. They save up. They're pretty good at hustling. But the other funny thing was he actually had no idea what they were and he'd wonder why whenever I wore them out to like work do's and

stuff that all these women would come up and go oh my gosh I love your shoes oh they're just beautiful like every time we went out with the shoes. I was going to say does he understand what the red bottoms are? He didn't understand and neither did my other daughters. It wasn't until that song came out you know with the red bottoms

my girls had Googled it, and they were like, what the hell are you doing with a pair of shoes? They're like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, yeah. But they love them. They love them, love them. That's something guys wouldn't know. I'd just be like, oh, yeah, you got them from Hannistead.

You're cool. Yes, yes. Brilliant. Hey, Jessie, thanks for your call. Some other text messages in. Jo messaged in saying that she helped her friend get away with a denim jacket purchase. Oh yeah. She bought it, went in the car

ride home, took off all the tags, got inside and Joe was wearing the denim jacket and said, oh my god, I've got a denim jacket if you want it, if it fits you, you can have it. And the friend was like, oh my god it fits perfect. She's like, oh yeah, you keep that then girl. It fits perfect, like I tried it on at the shop. Yeah, they did that in front of the partner, so the partner's like, oh yeah, you keep that then, girl. It fits perfect. Like I tried it on at the shop.

Yeah, they did that in front of the partner. So the partner's like, oh, that's good. Save yourself some money there. As long as your partner doesn't check the bank account, then you're fired. Yeah, yeah. Someone said,

I was talking to my partner about getting an all new car stereo speakers in a subwoofer. They said, absolutely not. I said, oh, okay. Well, maybe then I'll just get some new wiring because a new wiring can make it sound really good. They bought all new car stereo,

and they said, I'm just going to go for a tinker with that wiring, and then the next time they're in the car seat, that does sound a lot better. But did they not notice the whole stereo system was different? And again, the bank account, you're like, how much does the wiring cost? Maybe it's got to be separate bank accounts, right? But like a joint bank account somewhere.

Wow. I snuck in a Satisfyer Pro 2. I just left it lying around in the bathroom. My partner only just found out it wasn't a face washing pimple remover. It could pass as one. Yeah, it looks like it could just clean out the pores. How did he find out? By you walking in and he's using it to suck his pimples? He probably stuck it on his face and yeah, it looks like it could just clean out the pores. How did he find out? By you walking in

and he's using it to suck his pimples? He probably stuck it on his face and yeah, it wasn't working and he was like, how do you get this thing to work? Rubbish. Oh, horn. Horn. Oh, horn.