ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 6th August 2021

Episode Date: August 5, 2021

Top 6: Teen Votes  Ladybug  Megans Vax  Ruby Tui?  Producer Jared interrupted a Breakup...  Drunk Pig  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Clay. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Grab any size McCafe coffee for only $4. Conditions apply. I just changed my goddamn work email password.

It feels like yesterday. Okay. And I've just received the email saying my password will expire in 10 days. I think... It's every three months, isn't it? My current password is something like, why the fuck do I need a new password 2021? You can't have your past five passwords either. Or it can't be too similar to them either.

Yeah, because you can't just add a 1, 2, 3, 4, and then a 5, 6, 7 onto it. No, you can't do that. No, they're not. Someone was telling me that you did like summer 2021. Yeah. And it would last for the period of time. Summer.

Oh, yeah, right. Of summer. It's like three months or 90 days that it lasts. Yeah. So you get that. And then you go autumn. Autumn 2021. And then when it gets around to the next year, you go autumn 2022.

They told me to do that in IT. Yeah. And then it got to a year of next year, you go autumn 2022. They told me to do that in IT. Yeah. And then it got to a year of doing that, and I went summer 2021. It was like too similar to your password. Are you kidding? Yeah, because that's only four, right? And you need five passwords. You can't have your last. Well, invent a fifth season.

Monsoon. The monsoon 2021. Okay, so what are you going to go for? I mean, you can't tell us. Monsoon 2021. Oh, so what are you going to go for? I mean, you can't tell us. Oh, you can't. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleeche, Vaughn and Megan.

Vaughn and I just clearing our throat after vomiting in it after Megan was... Excuse me? You were just very inappropriate to us. No, I'm just saying, I didn't mean it how it was taken. Megan said to Vaughn and I, if you are good boys, I will tell you.

I will tell you something, but only if you're very good boys. We were just like, what? I mean, after we do this bit on here, if you're good, I'll give you some goss. We've been naughty. Man, Mr. Toyboy's been away, what, a week? I know. God, you've got to put that dominating energy somewhere, don't you?

My God. On the show this morning, another chance for you to have your boring mundane bills paid. We'll do the free ride with the movie Free Guy at 8 o'clock this morning. You've just got to get through when you hear the activator. We'll give you the chance as well to make a good day a great day with double or nothing. So make sure you're listening out at 8 for the activator. Friday flashback today. Your pick.

I have a couple of options. I'm scooting around. One's topical, actually. Okay. I have to re-listen to the song, make sure it's not an approves. Okay, we're going to phone in to MIQ as well

just before 8 o'clock on the show this morning. Ruby Tooey. Yes. Going to be talking to Ruby Tooey. And speaking of MIQ, I do have some questions about MIQ. Okay.

Yeah. So... For the interview or just in general? Just have some questions about MIQ. Okay. Yeah, so... For the interview or just in general? Just in general. Okay. I don't know when I'll ask those. Just keep the listener on their toes this morning. All right, well, listening, you've been warned. Be on your toes this morning.

The top six is coming up as well, listener. Yeah, keep you on your toes with that one too. No, there's a petition that's gathering some steam that 16 year olds believe they should be entitled to a vote. 16, 17. So you can vote at 18. Yep. At the moment you can, but the voting age down

to 16. Yeah, right. It's their world to inherit. It's their future. Yeah. People who have children who have wildly different political opinions tend to be the people who think this is a their future. Yeah. People who have children who have wildly different political opinions tend to be the people who think this is a bad idea.

Yeah. But no, let them have their say. I say, but the top six things that I would have voted on as a teenager. Next on the show, though,

something is becoming a trend. Yeah, some stupid moron thinks they're going to make $100,000 because they've got something that I'm sure if you opened a few packs, you'd probably find yourself. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan.

Hi. All right, you okay? Are you warming up? No. He's stalling to find the story, isn't he? No, no, I've got the story here I'm just trying to perfect that Well, it doesn't sound nice at all

That's if you can get something rumbling at the back What are you doing? That's kind of what I was after That sound An Australian teacher in Ipswich Which if it's the one, yes, it's the Queensland one I've got a friend that used to I don't know if he still lives there

But it was a really weird place Why was used to, I don't know if he still lives there, but it was a really weird place. Why was it weird? I don't know. Weird people? What would you liken it to a suburb or town in New Zealand? Oh, I daren't. Okay. I daren't.

Okay. Very loud, full of bogans. Right. Aggressive bogans. You just didn't want to say Hamilton, did you? Parts of Hamilton. Parts of... I don't know why I'm...

Hamilton. It's very specific pockets of Hamilton. Yeah, right. And from Hamilton. Okay, right. Norton. Myroa. Yep. Those little... But a whole... It was gross. I Okay But a whole It was gross Yep

I'll say it It was yuck So that's not what I feel about those suburbs No Maybe Norton But Right So that

On a larger scale Yep So she's in Ipswich In Just outside of Brisbane And she is She thinks This chip she found

This Arnott's Sn shapes that's stuck together, she thinks she could get close to $100,000 for it. And her starting price is $5,000. So these are the, what shape is a shape? Are they all hexagons? So they're two. No, they're different shapes. They're different shapes.

Different flavours are different shapes. But these look like hexagons. This is the pizza one. It's a sort of elongated hexagon. Hexagon. So they're two. No, they're different shapes. They're different shapes. Different flavours are different shapes. But these look like hexagons. This is the pizza one. Yeah. It's a sort of elongated hexagon. Oh, okay. Because the hexagon hexagon is barbecue, right? Yeah.

This is a hexagon that's been pushed in at the sides. Yeah, pizza. And so obviously the machine that cuts them or when they split off, it just hasn't happened in the factory. Or when it's baked and they've spread a bit, these have been close and they've joined. That happens when I make cookies all the time. Give them more room, babe.

Nah, because I really you don't know. I do give them room. I do give them room and then they blur together like they're some kind of, you remember when the Terminator broke into pieces and then moulded together? That's basically what happens in my oven. Right. Too much butter. With cookies. Cookie Terminator broke into pieces and then moulded together? That's basically what happens in my oven.

Right. With cookies. Too much butter. Cookie Terminator. So, yeah, I believe that's the case here. Right. She wants a hundred. So when did this become a thing?

Because the Doritos was, what, a few weeks ago or a month ago. Some kid got $20,000 for a Dorito. And it was all puffed up and it hadn't cooked right. It would have been a yuck Dorito to eat. Like it was all puff and wind. It was the kind of thing that you'd think would be taken off the line in the factory. They would see it and take it out. Some sort of quality control.

And then put it back in. Who gave that kid $20,000? Was it Doritos? I don't know. Or was it like someone on eBay or Trade Me? Doritos would have been, got so much publicity out of it, they probably would have been good. $20,000.

I've just clicked on this link for this kid. Some fool with too much money. That's got this big, perfect Dorito. Because what are you going to do? What are you going to do with a $20,000 Dorito? Nothing. Just you can be the person that says, I bought that. Yeah.

So you've got a great story to tell someone. Oh no, Doritos Australia decided to reward the Queenslander for her bold entrepreneurship and ingenuity. So good publicity. They just paid her for some amount of the publicity. Because if it had been an actual publicity thing, no one would have bought into it.

Nah. But they were just like, well, you've done some great advertising for us. We've got to spend some money on advertising, so we'll just give it to you. Shapes aren't coming out with 100K. She's gone too high. Way too high. Well, 5,000 starting though.

Okay, and any bids on it or no? Nah, just a lot of, is this still available? Because she did it in Marketplace and if you've ever tried to sell anything in Marketplace, you'll know what an absolute punish that is. Absolutely. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. A mum of an influencer.

So this is a 14-year-old influencer. She's very young. She's from Brazil. Okay. But she had garnered 1.7 million followers on social media accounts. What is she doing? At 14.

Yeah. What does she do? To imagine being 14 and having 1.7 million followers, like how would that mess with you, do you reckon? Substantially. Yeah. Because when are you allowed to get a TikTok? So Facebook's 13, right?

Yeah, I thought TikTok was about the same. Right. So she's been on, you'd imagine, social media for a year, and you have 1.7 million followers. Now, her mum... TikTok's 13 as well. Yeah.7 million followers now her mum tick tocks 13 as well yeah her mom has deleted her social media accounts oh all of her followers yeah um and her daughter was a furious now she has explained herself and said that um tick tock instagram yeah i know i was gonna show That TikTok, Instagram. Yeah, I know. I was going to show you in a second.

What? I saw a picture. I'm like, this must be the influencer and her pal. Yeah. Is it the same photo? That's the mum on the right. It's the mum and daughter. Oh, wow.

Okay. I was going to get to that. The daughter's 13, 14. The mum looks 19. Absolute tops. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also very attractive as well. And also has 116,000 followers on her Instagram.

Do we think mum was jealous? I think mum was goddamn terrified. I would be. That's. Yeah. I mean, she has kind of, she's kind of an influencer in our own right. Yeah. Sort of.

Not as, I mean, but she's also older, so she has a better sense of self maybe. Yeah. And her reasoning for deleting her daughter's Instagram and stuff is quite good. She said it's unhealthy. She didn't want her daughter going through life believing that who she was on social media

was who she was in the real world. She said, I don't think it's healthy even for an adult and much less for a teenager to base her self-discovery on online feedback. Well, it's a good lesson for all of us, isn't it really? It is. She said, it's hard enough for you to find out who you are at 14 years old when there are 2 million you've never seen in your life thinking they know you. It's even more dangerous. It's easier to lose yourself. She said she would go online and she would see the same old selfies and the same easy to do dances that Irunca do. So she's like, no.

And the creeps. Yeah, and the creeps. 100%. Because she's, yeah, they're both very beautiful. So I'm sure there were creeps as well. But the daughter initially very angry, but she said she's actually quite enjoyed being off socials and for now she's going to stay off.

So I think there's a bit of a lesson in this. All of us. From the fart-addled ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hi there. Hi there. Someone's having a lazy Friday, aren't they?

I'm struggling, man. I'm struggling. One of these is not yet written, so I don't know what's going to happen. Really? Why don't you, in the meantime, just let producer Jared come up with one? How old were you in 1999?

Six years old Okay Have a shot Top six things 16 to 17 year old me Would have voted for Yeah, okay And number one is the one

That producer Jared's coming up with I like that one Was that you? That's good What's going on? I don't know what about that But I like the topic. Was that you? That's good. It's going in. I don't know what about that, but I like the topic. So keep thinking on that. No, number two is going to be their one.

The top 16, 16 to 17-year-old me would have voted upon. There is a petition. Again, this gathered. I remember this happening when I was 16 and 17. There's always murmurs about this. Yeah, that people should be given the vote. Oh, and do you know who was all for it? The now Prime Minister.

Yes. So, let's see if she's flip-flopped on the issue. But should 16 or 17-year-olds be able to vote? I think back to me being 16 or 17. I don't know. Would it have made a difference? I like to think there's a higher calibre of 16 to 17-year-olds now. Yeah, definitely.

A slightly more informed 16 to 17-year-old. Would you have just voted for who your parents voted for? Probably. Because they would have been like, you're not voting. I didn't talk to my friends about politics. Yeah, right. We didn't talk about political issues. I just heard my parents at home mouthing off.

Yeah. And so I was like, I guess that's my political opinion. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I don't know that I would have voted. I probably just would have been like, ah, boy. No, you voted. Remember you voted in the local body elections for that hot one on the billboard.

That was like last year or the year before. Yeah, but you've come a long way. Oh yeah. This is what I'm saying. I wouldn't have voted back then, but now I'm an active voter. Do you think it would be young people would just more likely vote for younger politicians? Maybe. Or good looking ones?

Maybe. Or I don't know what would make them vote. I tell you what, 16-year-old man would have voted for Chloe Swarbrick, that's for sure. Cheers. She's just a great politician. She is, yeah. I know you're a big fan. Big fan. So I don't always agree,

but I would never tell her that because she has got a crosshairs and she's not afraid to point it at a middle-class white guy and absolutely make him wish he had not opened his stupid mouth, Mark Richardson. She's just mowing them down. Yeah, that's a good point. The top six things 16 to 17-year-old me would have voted for. The year would have been 1999.

Great year for pop music. Yeah, number six on the list for P.E. class at school to have a Buffy the Vampire Slayer element to it. Because Buffy the Vampire Slayer was on TV doing flips and massive jumps. Yeah. And Sarah Michelle Gellar was, like, strong. Yeah.

Who was the guy that played? He's been in Bones. David Ouroborianis. Ouroborianis. That guy, he was an angel. He was a bit of a heartthrob. Okay. Number five on the Brianna's. That guy, he was angel. He was a bit of a heartthrob. Okay. Number five on the list of the top six things 16 to 17-year-old me would have voted for.

I've actually, in my head there while rambling, I've filled out that whole thing of number two. So I look forward to it. For number five on the list of the top six things 16 to 17 or me would have voted for, for the Blair Witch Project to have never, ever been released or never have to be watched again and sure not kickstart a whole horror genre. Yeah. Never seen it. Thank Brittany.

I'd never been so scared in my life. It was pretty wild. Yeah. Because they got you in. Oh, my God. I knew better. I knew better. Even afterwards, I couldn't look through the lens of a camera.

I couldn't look through a video camera for a while because it made me feel like Blair Witch. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six things 16 to 17-year-old may have voted for in 1999 for full-blown heterosexual icon Ricky Martin to teach me how to shake my bonbons. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It was, he was definitely straight back then. He was straight back then. We don't listen to Shakespeare. A lot of markers. Just like Elton John was straight for our parents. Exactly. Who's going to be this generation's? Oh, yes, surprise.

But maybe that is a good thing. The progression is that people don't feel the need to hide that or repress it. National Party. Oh, yeah. That was Jesus Christ. Let me start it on a Friday. You know there's a problem when you agree with the young Nats about something. I know where the young Nats were like, we're a little disappointed that the senior gnats.

I was proud of the young gnats, actually. I know, and then I was like, blech. That's the one thing you get, young gnats. Well done, young gnats. There you go, young gnats. Go to the law office today. You've got a compliment from the show. Yeah.

And don't tell us we're a mouthpiece for the left. You just got told you said something good yesterday, so. And that's that. Now get out of here, you rascally little scamps. Number three on the list of the top 16, 16 to 17 year old me would have voted for petrol to stay under $1 a litre forever.

Oh yeah. Under $1? I don't think I remember that time. It was 1999 and I remember it clearly because I was working at a petrol station. By the way, I got hit up when I was on holiday by the kids of the people that owned that petrol station saying, mum and dad are sick of you talking about how you were paid less than minimum wage. They should have paid me more than minimum wage. It was years ago.

It was 22 years ago. So, I remember it because a guy came in and he was driving a Mark 4 Cortina. This is how clearly I remember it. He didn't have a fuel cap. He had what looked like a rag pushed in to stop the fuel bouncing back out. Also a mobile Molotov cocktail. You betcha. And he threw the rag that he jammed in his Cortina's fuel hole.

He threw it at me because he saw on the sign that petrol was $1.101 a litre. And he was like, when did petrol go over a dollar? I was like, I don't know, sir. I just started working here. And he threw the rag at me. God, he's going to be wild now. He'll be dead. He'll be dead.

That Cortina was, as you said, a mobile Molotov cocktail. Number two on the list of the top 16, 16 to 17-year-old me, would have voted for Furby's to bring out a Josh Hartnett Furby. Josh Hartnett. I just snorted. Yes. Yes. Furbies.

Furbies. They were creepy. I wanted one so bad. They were. My friend Kelly had one and it came alive. Yeah. It was creepy. But a Josh Hartnett one sure would have.

What a heartthrob. That put my heart aflutter. And number one on the list of the top six things 16 to 17-year-old me would have voted for, for everyone to stop freaking out about Y2K. Everyone was freaking out about Y2K. I was like, relax, man. All the computers are going to stop working. The planes fall from the sky.

Yeah, I said, it's 2012 we've got to worry about. It's the end of the world. The Mayan calendar runs out, man. You built that arc, didn't you? Huge arc. Get ready for the floods and it never happened. Huge arc. Full of Josh Hartnett Furbies. If anyone listens to the show and would like to give us an artist rendition of what a Josh Hartnett

Furby would look like, I would just love that. You'd lap that up. That's today's top six. ZDM's Fletchmore and Megan. Well, it all winds up on Sunday, the Olympics in Tokyo. Yeah. Another great day yesterday. A couple of silvers in the cycling.

Yes. Now, she's 21 years old. She got a silver yesterday in that one where they're all on the track and it's just absolute bloody chaos. It's like the bike line in rush hour. Except busier. It's like a quiet country

road on a Sunday morning when there's just cyclists riding four abreast not a care in the world and a Ford Ranger behind them screaming wildly. Get out of my bloody way you bastards. That sort of thing. Except it's around a valodrome. It's Car get out of my bloody way, you bastards. That sort of thing. Except it's around a velodrome.

It's Carina. Carina is what it's called. But anyway, Elise Andrews. Okay. She got a silver. She's 21. Yeah. So she's been training for a long time.

I've been riding a bike since I was like four. None of us were made for discipline when we were 21. I was just worried about my 21st birthday. I was a piece of absolute. Yeah, you were. I look at all of these athletes. Serious discipline. When we were 21, I was just worried about my 21st birthday. I was a piece of absolute. Yeah, you were. As I look at all of these athletes. Serious discipline. Exactly. Can't help but admire their discipline.

Yeah. And the men's silver last night to Campbell Stewart, who if I'm correct, I was told he wasn't even supposed to be in that race. The guy that was supposed to be in that race the guy that was supposed to be in that race was the guy that fell off yeah when we just missed out

on bronze and was injured so I think Campbell got into that race and then gets a silver that's amazing wow a silver

Nick Willis didn't place in the final for right for the athletics. Bart was in the final.

Shit, man. What is that? His fifth? Yeah. Fifth Olympics? He is. He's a svelte little machine, isn't he?

Today, Lisa Carrington got another gold. I mean, that just feels like on repeat. She's just like in a whole different league. As soon as the race starts,

she's a boatload. She's a boat length in front. But at the end, all of them look like they're going to have a wee vom. Like, they're like, she was doing a puff, but then, like, yacking to someone beside her. She had a vape. She pulled out her vape and she was like, she doesn't vape. She must have got it built into her paddle.

She wouldn't have that. She had a vape halfway through the race. It's just that it's strapped to her paddle. She's like, paddle, paddle, paddle. She wouldn't have that lung capacity if she was a vaper. So fit, man. Oh, she's insane. Yeah.

So fit. So today, looking forward to what else is happening today, the 50-kilometer race. That's the walking race. Oh, yeah. And they walk like Captain Kim. But their walk is like a run. I would not be able to keep up with that.

It's like faster than fletch walking. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You should do into this. Oh, my God. This is your Olympus sport. I'll get bored. And they do that cute hip movement.

Yeah, I don't like doing that. Really shows the tush. Get a pair of those walking shorts. Yeah, okay. Your PE teacher used to wear. And if he put his foot up on like anything, you'd see the balls. Get a pair of those shorts. Yeah.

So that starts at 8.30 this morning because it takes so goddamn long to walk 50 kilometres. It'll be finished by 10 o'clock tonight. Yeah. But this is the one where people get wobbly legs. Oh, yeah, they collapse. She's all go. Lydia Ko is still playing golf today. Oh, yeah, okay.

I don't know how she's going, actually. I haven't heard. This is the one I'm super excited about. This is the start of the K4 500. So this is the kayaking. Four people in a boat. Lisa Carrington back in the boat. Is she another chance at the medal?

Yeah. This is what I'm jazzed for. Yesterday, she became New Zealand's most decorated Olympian. So how many medals? By gold medals. She's got six gold medals in total now. I ordered the countries by overall

combined total of winter and summer games and you just scroll down for pages. She's got more medals than entire countries with millions of people. Yeah. In the entire history of the Olympics, this is her third. Yeah, she's got more golds alone

than most countries. It is insane. So that's going to be, that's going to be four people in the boat for the kayaking. Elise Andrews who got her silvers

back in for the sprints on the bike as well as, well, this is called a Madison. Gosh, the cycling has so many terms. Rustley Buchanan

and Jessie Hodges. Okay. Both of which apparently born in Hamilton. It's great there. Just claim a little bit of that. And the jumping team. The horses are back out there today doing the hard yards with a couple of... Stop stirring up the equestrian community.

The horses are out there with their tight plaits and their tail trims and some people are just going to bloody dress in tuxedos and catch a lift. Did you mention Tom Walsh and his bronze from yesterday? Yeah. I apologise. I don't think I did. I don't think I did. Shame on you.

Shame on me for not mentioning Walshie. Shame on you. Walshie for his medal yesterday. That was phenomenal. Sorry, I thought that was the day before. It's all a blur, isn't it? It's just been to a blur at this stage. Isn't it?

All these medals. This is our most successful games ever, by the way. Is it? Even beating Rio? Yep. Oh, fantastic. We've now surpassed that with the cycling silvers yesterday. And we've done nothing but sit here and...

Just enjoy it. Just enjoy it. And eat food. And say how tired we are. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. I got another colonoscopy in 10 days. You're not dying. No.

That we know of. The first time the fentanyl didn't work. The drugs don't work. That's a range of Rihanna's. My butthole hurts. Yeah, it's Rihanna's lingerie. Yeah. And anesthetist range.

And they look great. It's quite a thing to be drifting out to sleep in. That's very lacy. And out. So I have been sent this article a couple of times. Oh, you're on colonoscopy on the phone. I'm the colonoscopy guy. Send me your stories

Wednesday, next one's happening Monday week Monday week, yeah Same rigmarole, but I get a different painkiller I still get that drug that stops you creating new memories Yep Great Would you laugh, but lucky you'd had that Because otherwise it would have been quite traumatic for you

The pain is only a cloud, a cloudy memory Yep But the sandwich I can remember afterwards traumatic for you. The pain is only a cloud, a cloudy memory. Yeah. But the sandwich I can remember afterwards. I can't remember getting changed. I can remember struggling getting a sock on. I feel like I need to pick you up this time because it would be hilarious. Last time I was very emotional.

I got a little bit teary. But it was just because this massive build up to it. And I've been a little bit freaking out because I was trying to play it cool but it was getting it. Right. And I've been a little bit freaking out because you're getting, I was trying to play it cool, but it was getting 1.2 metres of garden hose with a camera on the end up the anus. It's a little panicky. Who knew that much could fit up there?

It's the same size. It's the same. The camera's like a Gardena nozzle. It's a GoPro on the end of a Gardena. It's not. It's tiny. It's tiny. Yeah.

And very, very few people apparently. But next time I get a different painkiller. Right. The propofol. Because it didn't work the last stuff. And so you were semi-awake. Yeah. I can't remember.

But they said it didn't work. And I can kind of remember not feeling great. So I get a different painkiller. I'm looking forward to it. Kill Michael Jackson. Yeah. People have been taking the opportunity to send you the story. Yeah. From, is it I Love Science?

Yeah. I effing love science. And this is from Dr. Keith. Dr. Keith is a gastroenterologist, not a bum invader. I dare you when you go to get yours done to call your doctor there. Morning, Dr. Bum Invader. So he is based in the United Kingdom. Okay.

And he talks all about this. He's got a Twitter account that's fascinating. I've looked more into this. They link a whole lot of his articles in this article. And he's revealing things that he's seen while doing colonoscopies. Yeah. And he said it's always interesting when you find an insect. Mind-blowing.

If you don't know how colonoscopy works, three days beforehand, you've got to start, even a week beforehand, you're supposed to start watching what you eat. No like little seeds-y things. No oats. There's folds of the colon.

Brown rice. Yeah, no brown rice. Nothing with a husk or a seed or anything like that. And then the day before you stop eating and you have to drink a gallon of this this salty liquid that immediately just flushes through you.

Yeah. I drank it all and then held on for as long as I could, and it was like an hour, and then I just exploded. So it clears it all out. Nothing should be in there. And he's put up the photos of the alive ladybug that he found in there in a colonoscopy. That is wild.

It's also a very high-def picture. Good colon. Clean as a whistle, that colon. Yeah. Clean as a whistle. But there's a live ladybug in there. I would not want to know. He said, it's unusual that it's alive, but I have found other insects.

There's dead cockroaches. Do they go in when you're sleeping? Yep. That's a theory. That's a theory. Especially the cockroach could have crawled in your mouth and just gone down in your sleep. Or it could have been in something that you ate.

Because it was dead, he said, but it was whole. The ladybug was alive, so he said that ladybug must have gone in the night before, and because your whole digestive tract is clean because you've drank the stuff that flushes you out it got kind of like a slip and slide through your whole system so it didn't stay in the stomach

long enough to dissolve and it was still alive at the other end of it. That is wild. Well I can't wait to see your photos. Apparently you do, you can request the video. Oh really? Okay. I didn't get the last one because I'd imagine the commentary wasn't so great. Do they include the director's commentary?

Oh. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Ah. Sashet. New Zealand food. Sashet Royalty Maggie have released a survey. Yep. About devil sausages.

Apricot chicken. Apricot chicken. Apricot chicken. What else have they got in there? Yum. They've got a thick brown gravy, a rich brown gravy, traditional brown gravy, brown gravy, gravy, and chicken and herb. You're missing the deviled sauce. Of course the deviled sauce.

The absolute Maggi sashay. Potato bake. They've got a cottage pie. Yep. Okay, we've given Maggi enough. And they're all yellow. So you stand in front of the Maggi display and you're like, where's my devil sauce?

No, they don't have the lamb shank one. Look underneath the devil sausage. Oh, yeah, look. Oh, no, you're right. There it is. Okay, and away we go. So they've done a study. They must be about to crank out some new recipes

or a package rebrand or something. Yep. It's the only reason anyone ever does a study. They must be about to crank out some new recipes or a package rebrand or something. Yeah. It's the only reason anyone ever does a study. And then they give you the stats and the hope you'll talk about it, and here we are. Well, they're lucky it's Friday. Yeah. They have found that Kiwi parents have seven recipes in their repertoire

that they will confidently cook from scratch. Yeah. Recipes in their repertoire that they will confidently cook from scratch. Yep. And only a quarter of Kiwi parents admitting that they only feel confident cooking four or less. That's why you just want to take the full menu. On Friday it's fish and chips. You can cook seven, but four they're confident with. Even when you think back to your own childhood and what your parents made you and then now as an adult, your meals,

you do go to your favourites, hey, and the ones that you can cook. 100%. And when you've got kids, your kids don't eat everything and they don't always want to try something new

and it's just easier and I don't want to argue and I'm tired and I know how to do this. Yeah. And you just do it. Yeah. And now, do it. Yeah. And now,

so growing up is a different story because growing up in the Smith household was red meat heavy. Yep. Oh, with meatloaf, your mum was just home killed.

Did her dry meatloaf all the time, wasn't she? Yeah, dry meatloaf. I tell you what, she'd branch out and she'd have a chicken rice risotto. Oh, mum loved

that rice risotto and the packet, the diamond. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's just chicken bits in there and a can of crushed pineapple. Oh, mum loved that rice risotto in the packet. The diamond. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there's just chicken bits in there and a can of crushed pineapple. Oh, okay. Oh, zhuzhed up. Spice it up.

Very zhuzhed up. That was about as fancy as it got. We never had stir fries. Yep. Never had them. See, stir fry's one of my go-to because that's so easy. That was dad's cooking night was the stir fry. Stir fry.

Yeah, we very rarely had them. And we didn't have many pasta dishes. No, neither. I think my mum is because pasta, not good for the hips. Yeah, mince and too many carbs. So no one shall eat it. Mince and macaroni was what we had, which is spag bol, but you chuck elbowed macaroni in the...

Spag bol was one of our go-tos. That was my brother's side of cooking when we had one night a week where we had to cook for the family. He cooked spag bol every single week. So we thought we'd open up the phone lines now

and ask you, what are your four meals or less that you always cook? Yeah. Or maybe it's less than four. Yeah. You rotate a couple of different meals,

but you cook. Especially if you're in a flat. You've got like two meals you cook, right? Also, is this even gonna work? Because most people just get takeaways now, right? Not every night. But a lot do.

The prepped meals. Yeah. My food bags, all the other ones. Yeah. Hello Fresh. Yeah. Help me out. There's four or five minutes of them. Wop. Wop. Wop. That's the wet old mincey pasta. And the bottom to the top.

It's a womp womp womp womp. It's my wet old mince pasta. Macaroni in a pot. Macaroni in a pot and put in some mince. It's my wet old mincey pasta. That one hasn't been selling too well. I don't know why. So 0800DARLSATM, we want to ask you,

what are your four meals or less? The survey says that New Zealanders are only confident with four meals or less. What are yours? And maybe you've got less. 0800DARLSATM, you can text as well, 9696. One of ours is definitely tacos. We have tacos at least once a week.

It's so easy. Everyone loves tacos. Manchi, the people that do the packets have managed to slip one through the old defences and they've given us a survey that we're talking about. We've lapped it up like lazy radio people with nothing better to talk

about on a Friday. The PR person actually said you should talk about this and do a phoner, which we're doing and immediately makes me not want to do it when someone says that. Because someone told you to. Yeah, yeah, but it's Friday, so. You win this time, Maggie.

You win, Magic. We're, we're, we're lapping this up like someone licking the bowl of deviled sausage juice. So the survey that they've sent us says that New Zealanders have, most New Zealanders have, most New Zealanders have seven meals. That they can cook. That they can cook.

Quarter of them can only do four. Confidently. They could muster seven, but four confidently. And then when you think about like how much the average person cooks and what your parents cooked growing up, that sounds about right. Yeah, well, because seven's like every day of the week, right? Yeah. So if you're not having takeaways, you need to pull out the ones you're not so confident with.

Exactly. So we want to know what are your four meals or less that you're confident with cooking? We'll start with Anonymous. Anonymous, how many do you have that you're confident of cooking? So it's actually my flatmate. Okay. And his extent goes to about a piece of steak and an egg,

and that's pretty much it. Wait, so is the egg on top of the steak? Is it a fried egg? Okay, and that's his one meal when he cooks? He might branch out and maybe make a burger, but the past few weeks it's been, that's what it's been. Just steak with an egg. With an egg on the top.

Okay, so that's a subtle lack of vegetables there. Are there any vegetables? No. He's a growing boy. He doesn't need them that much. He's got protein. That's all that matters. I'm pretty sure he's got that the wrong way.

April, what are your four meals or less? Creamy chicken, roast chicken, minced pasta, or nachos. That's solid. That's solid. That's solid. I like that.

Now, would fish ever get a look in? Pardon? Would fish ever get a look in as a meat? Oh, if I knew how to cook it, probably, maybe.

That's something I'm not confident with. I'm definitely confident with chicken and mince. Can't go wrong with mince. No, do you ever do the same meal two nights in a row or do you always alternate? It'll always be chicken one night, mince the next night, and then chicken the next, and then mince the next.

Red, white, red, white, red, white. I like it. That's creature of habit. April, thank you for your call. Claudia, what are your four meals or less that you're confident cooking? So my partner is sort of a creature of habit as well. We have the exact same thing for dinner every night, Monday through to Thursday.

So we have nachos on a Monday. We have either butter chicken or chicken carbonara on a Tuesday. Wednesday we have steak, eggs and chips. And then Thursdays we go for dinner at his mum's so we don't have to cook. What about

Friday? Well, Friday is sort of up in the air but it's usually like that spicy fried chicken that you get out of the freezer. Oh, yes. I know the way they're talking about them tegel takeouts. Non-paid sponsored endorsement here, but those are delicious.

Those are delicious. Claudia, brilliant. They're very naughty, but they are yum. Thanks, you call some messages in your four meals or less that you're confident with cooking. Chicken fettuccine, lasagna, mac and cheese, curried sausages. That's it. A lot of carbs.

But all from scratch. Oh, really? All from scratch. I thought that was all going to be packet stuff. No, not all packet stuff. Somebody else says nachos, tacos, spag bol, lasagna, sausage and mash. So they branch out from the mints on the last day. Yeah, it's a pretty mints-heavy start to the week there.

Yeah. Oh, bacon-wrapped meatloaf. Oh, okay. Tuscan chicken. Seafood chowder. Oh, someone's showing off. Lamb chops and some form of meatballs. Some form of meatballs.

Yeah. Okay, that's quite a good mixture there. Yeah, that's different. Mince with noodles. Hold on. Not just noodles. Mince with noodles, Doritos, cheese and sour cream. That's some sort of...

Is that some kind of noodley... It's like a taco bake. Noodley nachos. They did a noodle taco on MasterChef last night. God, I've got to stop watching MasterChef. Roast lamb. A roast is the other one. And curried.

Curried. No, that's just, I don't know. That's an autocorrect. You've autocorrected a completely different word there. You've curried something. Curried what? You can't read it out. It sounds dirty.

It rhymes with a dirty word. Okay. Does it mean lasagna maybe? I don't know. Jared's got a thought. They're trying to say sausages. What? How did you get that? It looks like

one of the words used in the song with Cardi B. Roast chicken deviled sausages. Okay. Someone said we had the same three meals for five years every night on rotation until we got one of those food boxes situations. Yeah, right.

ZM's Flesh Warner Megan. Play ZM. Yesterday on the show, we had a wee joke about how I was in group three for vaccinations and I hadn't yet got my letter or email. Your invitation. People like you have been doing my hidden. We're going to address it now, okay? Chill.

Breathe. Don't get angry at them. Don't get angry. Encourage. Encouragement. We've got to encourage. I knew I was in group 3 because I've got asthma

and and we also talked about how it's bad when because this happened to me as well yesterday my friend was like I'm getting my vaccine today and I was about to say

how can you get to have yeah I don't mind telling everyone why but yeah I've learnt you shouldn't ask as well yeah because you don't it's because she's over 65. And don't I look good?

Not bad, not bad. Someone then might have to explain a really serious health condition to you. Also don't be afraid to say, I would rather not share that information if someone asks. God, if a friend said that to me, I'd be like, what is wrong? I'm a VIP.

A VIP? A very injectable person. So anyway, I learnt my lesson yesterday and I got in touch and I think it's bookmyvaccine is where you go to online. It's on the COVID.gov website. I knew I was group three, but I didn't have a reference code. I didn't have any sort of invitation, which I thought I was going to get but I didn't have a reference code. I didn't have any sort of invitation which I thought I was going to get. Don't sit by waiting for them.

You've got to grab these things. You've got to be proactive. I have Fletch, and I tell you what, the amount of people that message me saying, you only spoke about this this morning. How have you already had your jab? So, I don't know if this is indicative for the whole country,

but in Auckland, there are multiple places where you can get your vaccination if you're entitled. So I was fascinated by this because the first place you visited that was closest to your house was booked. You said the- September, end of September. And I said, no, no, no, surely there's other places.

And in Auckland, it's a big city, a load of places to get your jab. And there were so many places with appointments yesterday and today and for the few days ahead that are completely open. There were multiple bookings available yesterday.

And there are, because I was googling at the same time you were looking, and there are pharmacies all over the country that offer jabs. There was the Bargain Chemist in Manukau, which had all their bookings for the next, like, week, and they were all available. I was like, why aren't people using these?

Get in and get it. Like, get in. If you're in group one, two, or three, and now group four over 55, is it? Get in there, or get, book for your parents or your grandparents. So, yeah, when I was booking it, because you do click on a place that's handy for you, and I just accepted that September would be the date.

But when Fletch told me to look around, there are multiple places that have so many available appointments. And you just went in. Yeah. So I didn't get any special treatment. And literally, I only found out about it yesterday and went and got it done yesterday. So I went there and it was a well-oiled machine.

I filled in a form, put my mask on, went inside. And just a shout out to those people working there. A few of them are sick. So the people working at the place I went to were pulling 12-hour shifts. Oh, so you're saying the sick people weren't working? No. No, no, that's what it sounded like.

You were saying, shout out to them, people working, they were sick. No, no, no, no. What do you want? They were staying home, which is the advice, especially in a vaccination area. So, yeah, people were pulling 12-hour shifts to do vaccinations. Oh, they're doing amazing work, yeah. So, yeah, you check in and you do your form and stuff.

And then went and got my jab done. It was super quick because I don't really like needles much and it went so fast and would have to be the least painful injection I've ever had. That's what Ross Boss said as well and I've heard that from other people that

the actual going in nothing. Easy, yeah. Nothing. And then you sit and wait 20 minutes and they make sure that you're okay so there's no anaphylactic shocks or adverse reactions. And the people were timing it for me and then asked, please look after yourself, have a Panadol if required. You may feel these symptoms, which I haven't had any flu-like symptoms.

I feel fine apart from I feel like someone's given me a dead arm. Yeah. Well, that's when you always get the flu jab every year. Similar to any other vaccine. Yeah. Now, the dead arm you're experiencing, would you put it on par with being in an ICU on a ventilator? Because I'm still just doing my own research.

I mean, I've got a dead arm, but you know what's worse? Being dead? Yeah. Oh, gotcha, gotcha. It's not great. Yeah. Yeah. But I was just wondering when my 5G kicks in. Good reception? Yeah. Oh, gotcha, gotcha. It's not great. Yeah. Yeah.

But I was just wondering when my 5G kicks in. Good reception. Yeah. So that is supposed to be a microchip in there. Don't even joke about it. There are people out there that believe it. I know. Where?

Yeah. Where? Do your own research or something? I don't know. Have you got your Pfizer boobs yet? No, I haven't got that either. Great. No side effects, got that either. Great. No side effects, positive or negative.

I mean, the big positive is now having an immunity to a deadly virus. Because in New Zealand we forget, you know, all the time that it's even happening. When I put a mask on again and I was sitting there and there's COVID signs everywhere and everyone's following protocol, I was like, so many people have died from this.

I feel so lucky. Yeah. And that's the other thing. You might know people that are in group three, one, two or three, right? And maybe they don't know all of this. Yeah. Especially if you're free during the day. Obviously a lot of people work nine to five,

but maybe you could take a different lunch break. Yeah. Go and get it done. Book in, exactly. So you get there, you get it done, you sit there for your 20 minutes and you're back. Yeah, but honestly, search around because there are a lot of pharmacies around the country that are doing it, and it's free there as well.

People just don't know about it. But if you're in, and you can go to the COVID website to check when you're due, when your group is, and even if you're not due, you can put in your details and they'll fire you back an email. Go to Book My Vaccine. They've got the checklist there too. Yeah. All right.

Nice. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. Huge fans of Jen Aniston on the show, as I think everyone is, right? Everyone loves her. Oh, she's great. And she just came out a couple of days ago saying she's had to break up with her friends that are anti-vaxxers. Yeah. I was like, ruthless. Great. Tough, but necessary yeah I think is what she said she's done an

interview with InStyle magazine and they asked her I think what she does when she's stressed like how does she stay um like disciplined she because she for her age she looks amazing like if you were her age She's 52 Yeah you'd just be like How does she do it Same with JLo Both look better

Than I have in my whole entire life I've stopped comparing myself To JLo We shouldn't You know We're completely different Genetic makeup She's a beautiful mix

Of Latino flavour And I am White Irish Starch You're a potato I'm a mix Between a freckle And a potato Latino flavour and I am white Irish starch. You're a potato. I'm a mix between a freckle and a potato. Yeah, sure.

Don't leave me in the sun. Jennifer Aniston has said that when she is stressed, she eats a chip, a crisp. Yeah, or one M&M. Me too. What? One bag. I can have one M&M and one chip. What? One bag. I can have one M&M

and one chip. She said I know that's so annoying. How does she stop herself? Because you have to have a packet right that you can go to when you're stressed to have one M&M. Yeah. How do you not just eat the whole thing? I can't do it.

That's why I can't have any junk food in my house. Unless I want to eat thing? I can't do it. That's why I can't have any junk food in my house. Unless I want to eat it, I'll go buy it. Otherwise, if it's there and I know it's there, I can't do it. That's her stress eating. So yeah, when she's stressed or when she needs to calm her nerves, she has a chip or an M&M. That's literally what she said.

What does she do with the rest of the chips? Save it for next time she's stressed. She's probably got one of those because she's rich. She's with the rest of the chips? Save it for next time she streams She's probably got one of those Because she's rich She's probably got one of those machines That seals it shut again You know those? Yeah

Absolutely cannot relate No That's crazy stuff But I mean I know that we shouldn't be like Eating our feelings and stuff But we all do right? That's good That's what I'm going to do with them

ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan Just giving it one last try there like eating our feelings and stuff, but we all do, right? That's what I'm going to do with them. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Just giving it one last try there. We can't get through to Ruby. Yeah, we did plan to talk to Ruby from... From the Black Ferns. Yeah, our gold medal winning Black Ferns, nonetheless. Her Instagram profile says, professional rugby player just trying to be a good person. Now isn't that

lovely? I'm not even mad at her. Like, she's in EMIQ. I'll be sleeping. Oh, I wouldn't have an alarm set if it wasn't EMIQ. Heaps of the Black Ferns, I don't know if she's doing it, but I've seen quite a few of the Black Ferns doing some sort of cycling challenge where every four hours

you have to do 12 Ks, is that right? So you wake up in the middle of the night, you do 12 Ks, is that right? So you wake up in the middle of the night, you do 12 Ks, you go back to sleep. It's called the something challenge. It's something cyclists do, and that's the exercise equipment they've got in their rooms. I'm not waking up to do a cycle.

You've just done a huge campaign and won gold, and now's your time to just sleep, right? Yeah. Executive Intern. They have been sleeping, but these are athletes. Yeah. Executive intern, you've tried the media manager and Ruby? I have.

No answer. Five times now. Five times. When she does wake up, she's going to be like, Jesus. Oh, God. What if this private number possibly works? Look, I mean, I'm not mad. Let them sleep.

Yeah. I do have a question. I want to send the cat some maccas. The cat. I call her Cat. Like Captain America. You know how the Avengers are called? You call her Cat.

I call her Cat because she's the captain of the Black Ferns. Right. I've made myself overly familiar. Okay. Okay, so Vaughn's been doing this thing where when people win medals, I message them. He messages them on Instagram like he pesters the Prime Minister with Instagram DMs. And how does he get away with it?

You're pretty much just a fanboy on Instagram. You are a fanboy. You're DMing famous people. Totally. He's like an Olympic gold medalist. It's awesome. I've got so much admiration. I see people from other countries sometimes win a medal.

I'm like, should I message them? Just be like, hey, man, you don't know me. Well done. I learned of you five minutes ago. But shit, man, that medal was awesome. I think I'm more emotionally attached to these Olympics. Especially after like five glasses of whiskey. Look, look, look.

I'm on the couch. I'm watching Lisa Carrington win her fifth gold medal. Oh, you didn't message her, did you? No, not yet. I'm going to wait until she's got the clean sweep of like eight gold medals. Then I'll be like, all right, calm down. Because we're our New Zealanders after all. But yesterday, the cat, Sarah Hidini, did a Q&A, I guess to pass the time.

Yeah. And she said this. Oh, Jesus. She didn't say that. That's a WhatsApp time. Yeah. And she said this. Oh, Jesus. She didn't say that. That's a WhatsApp time. Yeah. Hold on. My go-to one for this would have to be McDonald's, but because we didn't get that in

Tokyo, I had pizza, some hot chips, and some fizzy. So someone asked her, what's your ultimate food indulgence that you can't really eat while you're in competition? And she said she would have eaten Maccas afterwards when she got out, but she couldn't

get her hands on it, so she had pizza, hot chips and fizzy. Imagine, that's just what I eat when I'm hungry. Yeah. That's why they've got a gold medal. And I said cat. Oh my God, don't. You're so embarrassing. I want to send some Maccas to the ISO hotel.

How's that a possibility? Let me know your order. Yep. And she said, this is legit the best message I've ever received, all ISO. Hell yes, I'm in for this. For real. I'm like, yep. You've won a gold medal.

And someone's like, I'll buy you some Maccas. And she's like, too much. No, I don't believe it. I can't. So how do you send? Oh, you just put the hotel and the room number. I don't have the room number. That's a name.

You seem like an hotelist. I don't want to know the room number. Could you just? Not that I'm going to. No, just the name. I'm going to bust into the isolation hotel and be like, ah, I'm here now. Guess we're all bunking down together. Oh, my God.

That's so embarrassing. Exactly. That's not happening. Right. So you just send it to the hotel with their name on together. Oh, my God. That's so embarrassing. Exactly. That's not happening. Right. So, do you just send it to the hotel with their name on it? Yeah, and then they take it up to them. That's easy. I think they go through.

I'm just waiting on the order. I think they go through and make sure there's no, like, nail files or cell phones. It's a prison. There are no cell phones. Oh, okay. A nail file. I'm getting that confused.

It's MIQ. Right. Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, okay. That's happening. That's that easy Now are you paying

For this yourself Or are you Wrangling this Well look As you mentioned About five glasses Of whiskey Someone might have said

Tell me what the girls want Oh my god I might be shouting The Black Ferns Oh you're so Now if too many Of them If too many of them

Jump in Yep I'm gonna use Ross Boss's credit card. Because it feels like I shouldn't have to shoulder the whole thing. Oh, my God. So you want the praise, but you don't want to have to pay for it. I'll share some praise with the station.

You are embarrassing. After a certain time, you need your phone taken away from you in the evenings, I feel. You do. Friday Flashback. Well, it's a tradition. We take turns each week at picking a song that is at least 10 years old.

And Megan, it is your go this week. How do we search? This song is 11 years old, which blows my mind. We are all big fans of this album. Probably, well, in our opinion, best song of this album. Like, best song, best album from this artist. Probably, well, in our opinion, best song of this album.

Like, best song, best album from this artist. Wow. We've said it multiple times. This song was recorded in exile. You're probably going to guess who the artist is now because they do this often.

Recorded in exile after a media controversy. Nelson Mandela. What a great album. do this often. Recorded in exile after a media controversy. Nelson Mandela. What a great album. What album? When he was in exile, did he not record that album? It was called Winnie on My Mind. It was wife Winnie Mandela.

Yeah, it was on his mind constantly. Massive media controversy. Julian Assange. Julian Assange. Yes. Julian Assange Julian Assange Knock on my Ecuador Korean embassy What an album from Julian Assange I'm actually out of people that have been in exile

Do you have anyone else? Otherwise I'm out Edward Snowden He did the Christmas album Yes Christmas in Russia I was thinking of the Yes, Christmas in Russia. I was thinking of the single of Christmas in Russia. Yeah.

Would you look at that? It's Snowding outside. Yeah, that was good. Okay, definitely I'm out of people that have been in exile. From My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. Yeah, you're right. Oh, yes.

Yes. Champagne Kanye. And his new album is any day now, isn't it? Boy is in that stadium working on it. God, this is a great... How long can he stay there for? Great album, great song. It's your Friday flashback. Run away, Kanye.

ZM. Run away, Kanye. Sit in. So I think it's time for us to have a toast Let's have a toast for the douchebags Let's have a toast for the assholes Let's have a toast for the scumbags Every one of them that I know Let's have a toast for the jerkos Gotta never take work off Baby, I got a plan.

Run away fast as you can. Find pictures in my email. I sent this girl a picture of my... I don't know what it is with females. But I'm not too good at that shit. See, I could have me a good girl. And still be addicted to them hood rats And I just blame everything on you

At least you know that's what I'm good at And I always find, yeah I always find Yeah I always find something wrong You've been putting up with my shit just way too long I'm so gifted at finding what i don't like the most so i think it's time for us to have a toast let's have a toast for the douchebags let's have a toast for the assholes let's have a toast for the scumbags every one of them that i know let's Saboteurs for the jerk-offs

Gotta never take work-offs Baby, I got a plan Run away fast as you can Run away from me, baby Run away Run away from me, baby Run away And if that to get crazy.

Then run away. And I'm about to run away. Run away as fast as you can. Run away from me, baby. Run away. Run away from me, baby. Run away. Then, baby Run away Then I'm about to get crazy

Why can't she just run away? Baby, I got a plan Run away fast as you can And I always find, I always find something wrong You've been putting up with my shit just way too long I'm so gifted at finding what I don't like the most so I think

it's time for us to have a toast let's have a toast for the goosebags let's have a toast for the assholes let's have a toast for the scumbags. Every one of them that I know. Let's have a toast for the jerk-offs.

That'll never take work off. Baby, I got a plan. Run away fast if you can. It's Kanye West, Runaway. Today's Friday flashback. And that album, what is it? My beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy. Yeah, that's definitely in my top ten favourite albums of all time. It's going to get a listen to today, isn't it?

Yeah, he's gone downhill since. He'll never make an album greater than this. Don't, don't, don't. Hey, me. I mean, hmm. Don't run him off. He's in a stadium at the moment finishing off his latest ones. And he's in a state.

He is, yeah. He could be. Well, I love that. I don't care if anyone says a bad word about that, Megan. No, it's purely selfish, to be honest. Any metaphorical sort of deep-seated meaning to playing that specific song this specific week? No specific douchebags in mind?

Okay. You don't want to run through any feedback or we're happy with that pick? It is good and it is bad, but as you say. As you say. Great song. It doesn't matter. Personal choice there.

Now, producer Jared came into work today a little bit flustered because yesterday he was in the midst, found himself in the middle of a friend's breakup. Yeah, it was really awkward. Now, so you went around to their house. Yeah, I was popping over to see my plant guy to pick up a new house plant. Wait, what? I see you. What? That up a new house plant. Wait, what? That sounds like code for weed.

No, it's not. Weed! What are you buying? Weed? I was buying a string of pearls because we killed our last one. I killed my last one too. They look like peas. Hanging out peas.

We overwater them and then they rot. Do you know where they thrive? Where? A bathroom. Ecuador. Because they gather the moisture they need from the humidity from your shower. Unless you've got no light in your bathroom. True.

Yeah, true. Good point. So you go around to, why are you buying a string of pills from a friend? Like, why don't you do what everyone else does and go to a plant barn? I get mates rates. Okay. Yeah, because he likes your way. Wait, is this code?

Yeah. I'm so confused. I'm going to need to see a picture. So you've got a mate that deals in houseplants that aren't marijuana. Yes. Amazing. Amazing. Does he have other?

He's got other ones. I've bought other plants from him, too. He just propagates strings of pills. Yeah. Is this your mate that's a landscaper? No. Amazing. Does he have other plants? He's got other ones. I've bought other plants from him too. He just propagates strings of pearls. Is this your mate that's a landscaper? No, no, separate mate. You've got a lot of friends in the plant business. Yeah, yeah. Okay.

Cool. Yeah, there's something fishy here. Okay, anyway, let's put that aside. Let's put that suspicious nature aside. Yes, I'd organised to pick up the pot plant and as I arrived

his partner was there and she was like oh he's gone and I was like oh where'd he go we planned to meet up to do this purchase yeah

okay Steve here I've come for the string of pearls she's like did you want come for the string of pearls. She's like, did you want weed? Oh, the string of pearls. I need a succulent in my life.

And she's like, no. Wait, a string of pearls is a succulent? Yeah, kind of. I think it would go a little under that. They say you can't kill succulents and I always do. You can, but I'm watering them. You're focusing too much on the plant. Sorry, getting back to the girlfriend. And she said, he's gone.

He's packed everything, and he's left. Including the string of pearls? Yes, he took the string of pearls. Oh, you're supposed to pick it up. Right, so you leave without a string of pearls. Without a string of pearls. And I messaged him, and I was like, hey, man, where you at? Yeah.

And at this point, it took him a while to reply, so I was driving home. He's going through a moment and you're just, like, really gunning for the plant. Yeah, the middy wants her string of pearls. Of course she does. And, yeah, then he replied and he was like, yeah, I'm back home now. You can come pick it up. So I rocked up, grabbed my string of pearls, and he was busy just chucking stuff in a bag.

Well, like frantically packing. Sorry, one at a time, please. Actually, that's a great broadcasting technique you've got there. If everyone could just stop yelling at the same time. We need to learn. Which is it? You go first, please. No, you trash.

You're all talking at once. Did we just get told off by producer Jarrah? Age before beauty. That's your speech. Go, Megan. I forgot what I was going to say. I'll go then because he's so old he's forgetting what he's going to ask. Was this on the cards or was this a complete shock to you

that your houseplant supplier, his relationship was on the rocks? Our relationship basically is just that he's my houseplant supplier. Jesus. I'm so, like, I don't know whether or not this is drugs. No, he's serious.

Because we're getting a picture of the string of pearls to prove it's not. Yeah. Where was I up to in the story? You don't, your relationship with him

is primarily houseplant based. You don't know his relationship status. And you couldn't find him and you're like, where you at? Yeah, where you at?

He said, I'm back. You're in the middle of this and you're like, where you at? Yeah, where you at? He said, I'm back. You're in the middle of this and they're having a, it's very tense. He's throwing things in the car. Yeah, he's packing stuff up. Okay. Then I walk back up the driveway

and he's like, hey man, here's your plant. I'm like, cool, cheers. And I start walking back to my car and then I hear a, as he's booking it up. Oh, wow. Okay.

Heck. You didn't offer any sort of like, is everything okay? Do you want to talk about it? I was like, so you're supposed to bottom water these? Oh, my God. Are you meant to bottom them? Yeah. Yeah.

What do you mean bottom water? This is new to me. This is a new. Yeah, put the bottom in the water in the bottom. On like a saucer of water, yeah. And it uses it as a. It soaks up what it wants. Yeah, because he explained...

Wait, should I be doing that for other succulents like my cacti and... No. Well, it depends where they're from because he explained to me that... This is why I've given up. If you've just joined the show, this is the houseplant hour. And we are just discussing bottom feeding and the perfect house environment for your succulents. Strings of pearls.

After the break, we're going to be talking about how to keep the aphids off the roses as we approach spring. I myself have purchased a box of ladybirds. That's for after the break Are we going to ask people to call up With their been in a breakup? I feel like we kind of I'm in two minds What are you in two minds about?

It's 20 past 8 I want to go home I'm in three minds It's 20 past 8 I want to go home Two It feels like we've deviated from the original subject too much to take it back to there. Three, I just want to talk more about houseplants. What do you want to do? Have you since offered your friend any kind words?

Yeah, I messaged them and I was like, hey, man, hope you're all good. Let me know if you want a yarn. It's really important to know where you're getting your next houseplants from, eh? Yeah, I messaged them and I was like, hey, man. That's good to know. Hope you're all good. Let me know if you want a yarn. It's really important to know where you're getting your next houseplants from, eh? Yeah, well, yeah. And who does a better long feed fertiliser? Yates or Tui? Join us after the show when we're joined by a panel of experts. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan.

Just before we get to fact of the day, producer Jared has provided photographic evidence of these string of pearls. Oh, my God. I've never seen such a luscious. Yeah. Oh, show me. Just in case listeners wondered if he was on a slippery slope into a world of illicit substances.

This guy can grow a plant. Yeah, beautiful. Yeah, those are hard to grow. Yeah. Jared, can you nip me off one of those string of pearls? Can you propagate a string of pearls? You definitely can't. If I poke one of those pearly things into the soil,

that just works, right? Joining us on the Garden of the Next is our propagating expert. Honestly, I think we should do a gardening segment. Is seed raising mix enough, or do you need something a little special in your propagating?

Well that's not actually my string of pearls that's his string of pearls which I've got a snipping of. He's propagating from that string of pearls. That's a strong base model. Yeah maybe if you give it a while and I haven't killed it. I've never seen such a plump right at the top of the string of pearls. Are you sure this isn't a Google, like you've just Googled string of pearls and this is what you're telling us is his?

Can we get that on our gram immediately? Because I feel like everyone in their mind is creating a string of pearls. It's a lot more luscious than I imagined. A hundred percent. I think they're imagining a real rubbish one.

A string of pearls is not going to meet what they see visually. It's everything you'd imagined, really, and more, to be honest. The pearls at the top are less of a pea size

and more of a... Grape. Grape. Big grape. That is wonderful orb comparison sizing from my co-host, Carl Fletcher.

God, we need a weekend day. Join us next week on The Gardening Hour, where we're talking about what to plant in the month of August, because remember, spring is just around the corner. Fantastic. Thanks, co-host. If we're finished The Gardening Hour, it must mean that right now it's time to pass the microphone over to...

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's... Let us know in the ear, earphone car. Why not social media this when you get the string of pearls up? For the listeners. Today's. Let us know in the earphone, Carl. When at the social media this when you get the string of pearls up. For the listeners. Thank you. Today's fact of the day. The last Olympics based fact of the day for the Olympics. It ends on Sunday

doesn't it? Correctamundo. It's about pole vault. Okay. Pole vaulting must have been yesterday because Eliza McCartney shared the people that meddled because of course she had an injury that stopped her going to the Olympics, which is a real shame because she did so great last Olympics. Yeah. And I'm glad she's doing some work with a toothpaste.

Because she's got the best smile. She's got the most wonderful memory. That was the thing about Rio Games when she was competing. She smiled the entire time. She was using a six-meter-long stick to jump over another stick and then landing on a mat, and she had a smile. Absolute sitter for Colgate. That's who she's doing it for.

Yeah. The whitening, probably, eh? Yeah. But she already had great teeth, already had white teeth. Give it to someone like me who's yellowing teeth. Yeah, my three coffees a day. Really make it work. Yeah, see if you can do this Colgate. Good luck.

Let's see you fix a temporary filling that was supposed to last three months and has been in there for ten and a half, nearly eleven years. Anyway, Pole Vault became a full medal event at the first modern Olympic Games in 1896 for men. It wasn't until the year 2000 that pole vault became an event that females could also compete in.

Wow. Crazy, eh? 21 years of female pole vaulting. That took forever. I know. The Sydney 2000 Olympics was the first Olympics where females could earn a medal for the Olympic pole vaulting. Prior to that.

Do they say why? Thank you, Carlin, at the social media. This has just posted on our Instagram, FEM, the string of pearls. The luscious string of pearls. Carry on, please. Do you want an explanation into the sexism that's been going on for a long time? Yeah, if you could just... Otherwise, we could mansplain the sexism.

Okay. No. Would you like to do that? Why change it? What happens in pole vaulting? Okay. You run. You stick a stick in the ground.

This is probably where a woman started to get a bit confused. Right. The stick. It's a very long stick. It's not a short stick. Women are probably more used to holding a hockey stick. Yeah. Sure.

Like a wooden spoon. In the kitchen, yeah. Significantly larger than a wooden spoon, Megan. Right, okay. And so you run. Again, another thing women have trouble with. Running. Because of their boobs.

And their hips. Great for childbearing, not great for running. So, should I keep digging this? Of course I am. Come on. And there's no, yeah. I honestly don't know. There's no, yeah. Yeah. I honestly don't know. There's no explanation. It was just like, you could hurt yourself falling from that distance, love.

2,000, that's wild. Yeah. Yeah. So 104 years after men could earn a medal for pole vaulting, women could finally do the same at the modern Olympics. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. I can confirm. If you would like to see the string of pearls

previously mentioned on the Fletch for a Megan gardening hour, you can now go to our Instagram account, FEMZM, and fill your eyes up with those plump pearls. Beautiful plump pearls. Megan, the latest is next. Thank you, Fletch. Selena Gomez is You've got something on the end of your nose. Do I?

What's that? It's a little dot of makeup maybe? No, it's the black because you've got a coffee and it's got a your coffee order written on the top and it's vivid. Oh my god, maybe? Oh, no. No, it's the black. Because you've got a coffee and it's got a... Your coffee ought to have written on the top and it's vivid. Oh, my God. Thank you for telling me. I'll get that. You're welcome.

Selena Gomez. And I think we've allowed them to pole vault. No wonder. What were we thinking? What were we thinking? Oh, shit. God almighty. thinking. What are we thinking? Oh, shit. God almighty.

Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. My friend Helen has a pig. Is it a coony coony? A pet pig. Yes, it's a coony coony. It's a tiny, tiny, mini coony coony. What you can't officially say I've learnt. You can't say that there is a mini coony coony. This is to the coony coony

people. Okay. So you can't say it's a baby. It's a very small one. No, no, it's a very small Would you say like a toy coony coony? No, you can't officially say. People get funny about this. Okay. You know when people are obsessed with an animal and they're like, actually you can't use that because it's blah blah blah. And I stop listening. But it looks like a little teacup tag

doesn't it? It's a tiny coony coony. It's a tiny coony coony called Sophie. Yeah. And Sophie kind of lives the life of a dog. Like it's an inside pig. A lot of people walk their coony coonies, don't they? Yeah. And you've got coony coonies.

They'd totally be walkable except ours are too fat for the harness and they don't have a definitive neck between the chin and the shoulder so there's nowhere for a collar to go. You'd need an actual full body harness. Yeah. It's like a lock that plays for like a Georgian. You know, the World Cup, you see those like Georgian rugby players and they're just like a block of a man.

No neck at all. Is Sophie, does she play fetch? Here's a picture. Here's a video of Sophie pushing her food bowl across the floor saying, I need to be fed. Sophie goes for like runs on the beach. When Helen went overseas, Sophie went and stayed with her grandma and went to like bars and wrote through her stuff.

She's a real sociable pig. Oh my God. This sounds great. This pig, yeah, loves, everybody's getting cuddles from the pig. Anyway, yesterday when Helen went to work, it was raining. So she let Sophie stay inside, fully house trained. Okay. Fully house trained like you'd leave a dog inside.

Leave a little pee pad. Where does it go? Oh, it's got a pee pad. Pigs are amazing at that. Even like when we had pigs growing up, they always went to the toilet in the same place. Okay. Not our pigs because they're in a paddock. They just poo everywhere.

The pig goes on a pee pad. Yeah. Like having a dog in an place. Okay. Not our pigs because they're in a paddock they just poo everywhere. The pig goes on a pee pad. Yeah. Like having a dog in an apartment, yeah. So while Helen's out Sophie's little snout smells something and it's in the liquor cabinet.

So it gets into the liquor cabinet chews the lid off a bottle of Bailey's and proceeds to drink half a bottle of Bailey's salted caramel. Was it unopened or had it already been?

I think it had been opened, but there was still a lot in there. Well, what kind of lid? Aren't they like those aluminium? Little metal. Yeah, those thin lids that you totally can misshape. So I'm guessing if the pig just had a little chew, misshaped it enough that the Baileys started leaking out and then Sophie was in the Bailey's on the lino.

Started lapping up the Bailey's. Drank half a bottle of Bailey's. Helen arrives home to a drunk pig asleep in a puddle of Bailey's. Now this is where it gets really cute. Yeah. I got a video of her showering her drunk pig. Would she give you permission to share these? I don't know, I'll ask

Because these are hilarious We already asked She's like Because you can hear that If you listen, you can hear an oink at the start Hold on, it's about to start again The pig falls over and it's like stumbles Yeah

Oh, buddy It's drunk Poor little pig It's drunk It's a drunk pig It had too much Baileys. I mean, we've all been there. Absolutely.

And then the pig had to get a towel dry. Let me click on. God, I'm like your mum. Let me show you what we did on holiday. Here's the pig getting a towel dry. Oh, my God. It's so cute. It's a real cute little pig.

You're getting a towel dry. Yeah, it's a pest. It's like, you know when your friend at a party vomited on themselves and you showered them off and then you dried them and they're like, I'm so sorry. You're like, it's okay, don't worry about it, this is what friends are for. That's pretty much what the pig's saying with its eyes.

And then it just needed a little post shower lie down and listen to this drunk pig getting a tummy scratch. That is the cutest thing you've ever seen. It's just like absolutely on its back. Oh, wow. And then when it started to feel a little bit better, it decided to walk it off.

Here's Sophie going for a walk down the road in her jumper. I honestly think she, I've told her, I was like, Sophie the pig needs her own Instagram account oh my god I'd follow that because A super adorable

and it's always up to shenanigans Sophie the pig would be massive on TikTok if we're allowed to share those videos we should because they're hilarious it's what we need

ZDM's Fletchmore and Megan now this morning we did promise you a chat with Ruby Tooey Black Ferns currently in MIQ gold medal winning Black Fern as well.

And it appears at that time of interview, 7.50, that she may have been asleep and the media person also asleep. But hey, we can't be mad. Fair enough. It's fine. Sleep in. I wouldn't wake up early for an interview. You deserve it.

So Executive Intern, you apparently had a new time for now. And what's happened when you've called? It says this number has been temporarily disconnected. Shouldn't pay her bills. Yeah. So that's real neat. Okay. Maybe you tried

the right number? I've tried another five times. She's turned it off, hasn't she? She doesn't want to go to sleep. I'm not mad. Yeah, so I've DM'd her again saying, actually, would you give us a tinkle instead? Well, it's too late now. We're finished.

I'm not hanging around for any gold medalist. So maybe in the next sort of half an hour, we'll get a tinkle back. Hey, look, look, look. It's Friday. It's true. It's Christmas next week. What?

The year is 2028. What even is time? I'm too old for this shit. I'm retiring in two days. So don't you do anything, young rookie cop, that's likely to disturb my retirement.

Oh, what? Now we're in a police drama. We're in lethal weapon. I'm Danny Glover. I'm a disgruntled Danny Glover. And I tell you what, there is going to be How To Pay

when they re-release this Lethal Weapon and a strong African-American character has been recast as a white guy. How To Pay. But it's a role reversal.

Yeah. It's been a week. Later. Thanks, Rachel. Welcome to the show, Fleach, Vaughn and Megan. It is three minutes past nine. Holy moly.

It might be happening. An hour and ten minutes after it was initially supposed to. We're joined on the phone by Black Fern Seven gold medal winning. Rudy Tuohy, good morning. What's up, team? Oh, my gosh. Look who's awake god look who's awake look who's awake

eh I'm not even mad nah we're not mad we can't be mad we can't be mad at you I'm so sorry I got confused I was like

I thought I had hoedocking the other day didn't and then I caught up and then I didn't and I was like oh man but I'm here now

I'm here now is Jeremy Wells to blame for all of this well I thought I did two shows and I got real confused oh, man. But I'm here now. I'm here now. Is Jeremy Wells to blame for all of this? Well, I thought of two shows, and I got real confused. Oh, that's right. It's confusing. It's all good. It sounds to me like the afternoon show is pre-recording their Friday afternoon.

Anyway, we're here now. How's MIQ? How's having a gold medal? How was the Olympics? Unload everything. Okay, well, MIQ is really, it's really confusing. Like, I don't know what date it is. Even the yard time, we get like an hour's yard time every day

and it keeps changing. And that's like the highlight of my day and I miss it sometimes. I think my issue is me here. No, it's cool sleeping next to a gold medal every night, isn't it? Do you actually put it on the pillow next to you or on the dresser? Nah, on the bed, 100%. On the pillow. We all do. That is so great.

Good night, baby. Sweet dreams. Give it a little touch. Give it a little polish. So, are you going to see the other girls in the team or, I mean, obviously they're not face-to-face, but in the yard time, are you talking at distance? Or is there a big WhatsApp group?

There's group calls. We've got an Insta group. We definitely chat at yard times, but there's only superior members of the team who've got balconies that can chat to each other. Oh. Yeah, so I'm not push-a-wittin' yet. She hasn have got a balcony that can like chat to each other. Oh. Yeah, so. I'm not a Porsche woman yet, so.

Okay. She hasn't got a balcony. So what are you going to do when you get out? When you get out at MIQ? You've got some

celebrating to do. Yeah, or need to go see the family. We needed like to celebrate with each other like as a team. Yes. It's so weird.

Like we're like, woo! And then you're just like talking to yourself. In a room. You guys are going to be getting out as Lisa Carrington and other medalists are getting in. So I feel like until everybody's out of MIQ,

we're not going to be able to have this big post-Olympics like ticker tape parade of the entire country to celebrate you guys for a little while. So that's nice. You'll be able to catch up with family, get all the praise and then get back on the praise wagon and go down the country. Oh, man, I didn't know that. Lisa doesn't really get that often that she does at the lookbook.

That's the one time she'd be keen. So we have to start something, like some sort of parade. Yeah, definitely. Definitely a big parade. We've been told that you're on a bit of a fiending for Toffee Pops to be delivered to NICU. Has that wish been granted and fulfilled, or can we get some Toffee Pops on the courier?

Honestly, I've been having cups of teas, but you don't get cookies, blickies. It's been a long time. I haven't had sweet treats in a long time, you know, like I haven't had sweet treats in a long time. And then I went on a live last night with Brodie Kane and just said like,

yeah, I'd like a lunch and toffee pops, eh? And then honestly, I wrote like 10 packets turned up and now I'm like,

oh. Too many cookies, yeah, go to 30 of them. Wow. Oh, that's so cool that people did that for you.

Nah, it's pretty special and like, this Olympics, like, honestly, there were no crowds but I feel like you could feel

New Zealand support even more. It was just real special and I think it's just because it's been a bit of a great year, like, it's been a bit of a hard year for everyone and so, like,

to have something positive, like, to be part of that has been really, really special and I just want to shout out the New Zealand public, like, thank you so, so, so much. Especially the women rugby player,

like, you don't know how much it means. Every like, comment, share. Even if your comment was like, you played mud. Like, it's still cool, right? You know? Man, I watched you guys win. And I don't know. Yeah, it just, your emotion that you guys let out, I cried with you.

I was just, like, so happy and proud of you. Like, it was awesome. Oh, no, thanks, guys. It was, it's funny because when you're at a tournament, you've got to, like, stay awesome. Thanks, guys. It's funny because when you're at a tournament, you've got to stay focused. You can't get too emotional. So we're like, no, no, no, one more job, one more job. And then with that whistle went, oh, we just lost it.

Absolutely lost it. But with each other, we had each other there. So that was a moment I'll never forget for the rest of my life. And you guys were up insanely late that night. I asked a couple of the Black Ferns and they said, after a tournament,

you guys have trouble sleeping. Even though you're like physically exhausted, the mind's going and you... Adrenaline. Yeah, the adrenaline's pumping. Yeah, it's so funny. Like, because you've got

to get up for that final. It's usually the hardest game and everyone's just like, let's go. And then, but then, because we had to get out of the Olympic Village

and by the time we'd packed and then you're like, go lie down to sleep, the sun rises so early in Japan, it was, like, 4 a.m. We were, like, oh, I will not sleep. So we were just, like, having day games. But, like, there's still people running around. The village is so crazy.

Like, I remember watching Uganda run around the village on a Friday, and they started on, like, a Tuesday. Like, they just, it's real intense. Arnie Village. That's awesome. Well, thanks so much. How many days have you got left in MIQ? like a Tuesday. Like they just, it's real intense. Wow. Party village. That's awesome. Well, thanks so much. How many days have you got left in MIQ?

I mean, you don't know what day it is, so maybe you don't know, but. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe like 11. Okay, well, if you run out of toffee pops,

let us know. Yeah. Well, thanks guys. I appreciate you, man. Awesome. Ruga Tui, thanks so much for the chat. Thank you guys.

Have a good one.