ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 6th December 2021

Episode Date: December 5, 2021

2021's Most Used Emoji  Top 6: Tesla  What happened when you tried to impress a Hottie?  QR Code PSA  Athiests  12 Days of Fletchmas!  Am I A Bad Person!?  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe, Great Barista Made Coffee, On The Go, Just Us Two Today. Yeah. With Megan away. Are you booking something? I'm just booking tickets to the movies.

It's my return to the movies. Yeah, good. After lockdown, I'm going to go see Eternals. I've heard that's really poos. It, I... You don't care, do you? No, I'm going to go see Eternals. I've heard that's really poos. You don't care, do you? No, I don't care. I'll watch a superhero movie. I love them all.

Oh, yeah, regardless of its Rotten Tomatoes. Yeah, but it started out really good, and then it got, like, firebombed. Like, people were purposely marking it bad. Like, critic reviews are okay. Right. Yeah, critic reviews are okay. 6.8 out of 10 on IMDb. 48% Rotten Tomatoes, 52 Metacritic. Yeah, critic reviews are okay. 6.8 out of 10 on IMDb. 48% Rotten Tomatoes.

52 Metacritic. Oh, what are the critics? Part of Rotten Tomatoes, though, because that was the big thing that got dragged down by the audience. Google users 79% like the film. Okay. So there you go. I just like superhero movies. And then Spider-Man.

I'm very much hanging out for Spider-Man later in the month. Now, what movie, what cinemas? Because that's the key is picking a good one with a good seat. Well, I'm going to Westgate. Okay. Which is the closest to my house. Yeah. But was never very, like, nice.

But apparently friends who also live in the area said they went recently after a full reno. And there's reclining chairs. Oh, okay. Yeah, bigger, wider reclining chairs. Yeah. And apparently the time zone has a few new toy arcade machines. Okay, are you allowed to go into a time zone as a man approaching 40 without kids? Very much so.

Okay, right. Very much so, because no one like a man approaching his 40s will pump that claw machine full of money to win a toy that he totally could have bought from a toy store next door for about a tenth of the price. Yeah, that's true true you're probably more cashed up than like a kid a nine year old yeah well at one time so i go to the claw machine because i absolutely deplete me of all my my liquid funds thanks rachel good morning welcome to the show. Fleets, Vaughan and Megan. It's three minutes past six. Did you celebrate at the weekend?

Did you go out? Yeah, I went out for a meal. And then went to a 40th, but then wanted to go home, so went home. So kind of some freedom? A little snippet of freedom. A little taste of freedom. As much as Vaughan the Social Butterfly can handle. Eh, freedom's overrated.

Nah. It was alright. I was going to say it was good, but it was alright. Yeah. I don't know. You? Yeah, yeah. It was great to see people out in Auckland.

Oh, yeah. When they showed to see people out in Auckland. Oh, yeah. When they showed it on the various news channels, it did look busy. Yeah, it was good. The world full of vaccinated people. Yeah, that's good. All right, coming up on the show this morning, the 12 Days of Fletchmas is back.

If you would like to participate, I'm going to, just before 8 o'clock this morning, call somebody from my naughty list and somebody from the nice list. So you just need to register ZM Online and tell us why you deserve to be on either. We've done this a few times, and it's about 50-50, isn't it? Naughty and nice winners.

So don't think you're going to suck up and go on the nice list. No, it doesn't always win. It doesn't always win. Nope. So we'll do that about 10 to 8 this morning. So if you'd like to register ZM online, the top six is on the way. Tesla, the Elon Musk company that specializes in electric vehicles,

has a cyber quad for kids. This is an electric quad bike. Oh, wow. He's a giant big kid, eh? It's cool, but it's like, remember when he unveiled the Cybertruck? Yeah. And it was all like weird angles? Geometric angles?

Yeah. Well, it's the same. And currently, even though it costs $1,900 US dollars, sold out. Oh, wow. Okay. It's sold out. But I've got the top six other electric things Tesla should be doing for Christmas. All right.

It's coming up in the top six other electric things Tesla should be doing for Christmas. All right, it's coming up in the top six. Next on the show, though, an Italian dentist tried to get around getting the vaccine by getting the vaccine. How he did it, I'll tell you next. All right. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. While our vaccinations, we're getting some good news. Auckland DHBs, 90% fully vaccinated. Was it the whole country is 90%? No, not yet.

Not close, but not yet. And Coastal Health, I think. Oh, yeah. Down, down. Yeah, there's quite a few. Yeah. So when's the whole country at 90? Before Christmas, right?

They reckon? I think on track. On track. Great stuff. That Google vaccination overview that was always like really up to date isn't up to date anymore. Good one, Google. Can somebody Google? Have a word.

87% eligible population with two doses. Oh, that's fantastic. Yep. So that's 93% with one dose. And so I was reading the total amount in New Zealand that are not vaccinated that are eligible. It's something like just under 300,000 like six percent three hundred thousand people that haven't had a vaccine at all at all that's so much more than i thought though um but we think about five million so yeah since five hundred thousand it's just yeah okay yeah okay that's more than i thought and it's

it's come down like it was 300 and something last week. But, like, when you talk about minorities. Yeah. That's an insane minority. Well, in Italy, another push has been out there in all the European countries, actually, for everybody talking for total and honest open freedom. Granted, their vaccination rates were lower. But lots of European countries are shutting back down over winter.

The ones that were like, oh, we're just going to see what happens. Well, it turned out lots of people caught it, lots of people died, and it was way too much strain on our health system. So we're going to have to shut it down again and really putting another push in for vaccinations. Well, a dentist in Italy may be facing criminal charges because he took a fake arm in. So he tucked his real arm inside his shirt like you do when you're a kid. You're like, oh, my arm's falling off.

And you're like, ma'am, I've lost my arm. Ha, ha, ha, ma'am. She's like, I can see it, Dan. You're stretching your jersey. Yeah, and if you're a real ballsy kid, you'd put some tomato sauce around there, but that stuff's known, so you're going to get a kick in the ass with that one. Yeah. Inside the shirt,

it had a silicon arm hanging down and walked in and was like, flop. And, was he just hoping that, hoping that she would inject the silicon arm with the, this guy's a dentist. He's in,

I would definitely put dentists in the medical field. Oh, a hundred percent. I would put them within that medical field. She felt really bad, the nurse doing it originally. She felt terrible because she thought this man was an amputee and no one had written on his notes that he was an amputee and she'd put up his strong arm.

But then when he didn't say anything and she pulled it up and she could see it was silicon, she was like, oh, this guy is trying to get me to inject vaccination into a silicon prosthetic. So that he'd then have the record as having the vaccine and would have a pass. Yes. Oh, my God. Correct.

But then I don't know, what's it like injecting? Because I know it's not a lot. Like, you look at the needle in the syringe and you're like, how many mils are in there? And it's bugger all. It's a tiny amount. But I don't know how it would go into silicon, then if you injected it, it would be like and just kind of squirt out somewhere. And squirt back out.

Oh yeah, because there'd be nowhere for it to go, unless it was hollow in the middle. Yeah, but she was surprised that a man who worked in dentistry thought a nurse wouldn't notice a fake arm. And just pop it straight in and away they go. That's mind-blowing. That's good stuff. Do you have to get it in the arm?

Could you get it in the butt? I don't know, actually. If you were after a slightly more cushioned area, could you go for the baton? To get it into your bloodstream quicker? I don't know. You'd go in the eyeball

if you wanted to get it in. Is it the eyeball? Well, I don't know. Or maybe a suppository. Better get it into the old system pretty quick. Yeah, it'd be hard to get vaccines up if that was... Yeah, yeah.

But mind you, of that 6% left, someone's got to be into it. Well, maybe that could be the option for... They have a cut-off date of Jan 1. If you don't get the injection, it's suppository. Yeah, it's... But it's still an injection. They just leave the whole thing up there. Although, if you were scared of needles

It might be It might be an option I don't know In paste form I don't know We're not doctors We'll leave that to the extra doctors I'm not even going to do my own research on that online

I'm going to leave that to the professionals Well a young woman has opened up As you do on TikTok That's where I do all of my opening up About how she gave birth After finding out Just 50 minutes before 50

50 So she goes to the hospital She's like I'm experiencing Intimidate cramping Of the wildest regard And they're like you're in labour She took to social media to lift the lid seeing intermittent cramping of the wildest regard. And they're like, you're in labor. She took to social media to lift the lid on the unexpected surprise birth of her daughter.

The now 23-year-old was shocked to discover she was pregnant after being on the pill for a lengthy period of time and still only in size six clothing. What size six clothing? Small. What size is small? Small. Very size is small? Small.

Very small. Okay. Yeah, and so yeah, and then they're like, oh, surprise, you're having a baby. Okay. Now these stories are around, it was the start of the year we took to the New Zealand woman who didn't know she was pregnant until she was literally giving birth. Yes. Remember that?

That was an absolutely wild story. It kind of got picked up again and talked about in the media. Correct. After we talked to her. Yeah. And went viral. That was just nuts. She had no idea.

No inkling, no morning sickness, no nothing. No. She had no idea. So she probably ate in soft cheeses, sushi, a rare steak, alcohol. All the things you, what else aren't you allowed to eat? Cigarettes. Cigarettes. Well, actually, I think the jury's out on cigarettes.

No, cigarettes, I don't want anyone misquoting that. But the guy on the radio said I could smoke cigarettes while pregnant. Shouldn't smoke cigarettes at all. No, they're off the table. So 50 minutes. Was she at, Is there a word Was she was at The doctor

When it happened Well she just said She had no idea She was pregnant She'd been using The contraception She just woke up One morning

With a lot of pain In her stomach In her back And she thought She was constipated Right So she's from the UK And then

She went to the toilet Her dad and parents Found her on the toilet And she said something's not right. So they called her an ambulance. And that's, yeah, they were like, oh. My vagina's crying. Yeah, you're having a baby. Good luck.

It's got a head and it screams now. Oh, that's a baby. So I'll wash you guys when she gives birth. 50 minutes. Yeah. Good, good heads up there. Yeah. All right. 621.

Next on the show, I will tell you the top. I will give you every single emoji in the order of which they were used in 2021. I've found a very extensive list. ZDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. 2021 Unicode, the home of emojis.

Unicode. They make them all and all the devices use their emojis. Correct. They create the standard. So they have let us know the top 20 emojis for 2021 and their rank change. Oh, okay. I love a rank change. Like a music countdown.

Like Adele. In this week, a number eight falling three places from five last week. It's Adele. Yeah. And then you play. Good stuff. Yeah, that sort of thing. I'm just looking at my.

What was the buy-in? Was there always big buy-in for music charts for people to tell you where it was last week? Was that to give you the on-fire to go and vote for it? Yeah, maybe. Or it just gets you excited about a song. Yeah. Your favourite song. Or no, sad for your favourite song if it's slipping down the charts. Yeah. And it's still your number one. What's your,

do you have your most used emojis? Give me a second and I'll pull them up. Because I feel like, I feel like if I say mine and it might give away the top one. Because I reckon Well, tell us one of the surprising ones in your top. Because you know what I've said in using...

You know how you have to go down? Yeah. Well, why don't you... Okay, I'll just give you my phone. You've got the purple devil face in there. The evil purple devil face. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dribbly mouth, which is like, yum, that looks yum, dribbly mouth.

Thumbs up. That's exactly what I use it for. Thumbs up. That's exactly what I use it for. Thumbs up. Yep. Then you've got face like, showing all the teeth, awkward. And then eggplant. Yeah, no, I love. You love eggplants.

I've got an eggplant curry. And then two down under eggplant splash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lots of beach. There's been a lot of beach time. Oh, because of splashing. You've got traffic lights in there as well. Oh, yeah, because of traffic lights. Because of the traffic light system. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lots of beach. There's been a lot of beach time. Oh, because of splashing. You've got traffic lights in there as well. Oh, yeah, because of traffic lights.

Because of the traffic light system. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We've been using that. There's a camera and they're taking a photo. Is that requesting pics? I don't know. Okay. Yeah.

I think you're just getting into the emoji list now. I've got, you know what I'm a huge fan of And I've been using it Tons Okay The Italian hand Oh okay Yeah right Italian hand Made its way into

Emojis So Charlotte could be like We'll have this for dinner tonight And you'd be like Yeah yeah yeah Because it's kind of like Or just like You give a bit of attitude

You give a bit of Okay But I like it The Italian hand Is in there I've started using You know The one you use,

but with the cold face as well. Oh, okay. Yeah, right. I've started using that a bit more. The helicopter's in there. Not sure when that got used or how that's in there. Yeah. Crystal balls in there.

That gets used ironically. Well, you love your crystals. Yeah, you do. Yeah. And I love a good vomit, the vomit emoji too. Yeah. It's literally just like pouring out of its mouth. But here's the 20 as used this year.

20 is the heart, but it's the heart that's from the playing cards heart. There's two hearts in the top 20. One's got a sheen to it, like a 3D looking heart, right? Yes. And the other one's just a flat red heart. Face palming is 19 and that's moved up quite a bit. Smiley face, traditional smiley face. Oh, no one's using that, are they?

That's moved up a little bit. Fire is number 17, and it's fallen down a little bit. Grinning face with the sweat bead, 16, but also fallen down. Pleading face, that's the big puppy dog eyes. I expected to see that in yours, to be honest, because you do big for it. Has moved up hugely. Now, I'm not sure if that's because it's a new entrant and it wasn't on the list last year, but it's moved up from like 100.

Okay, wow. Right up with the pleading. Two hearts is still being used, but it's fallen a little bit. Beaming face with smiling eyes, up slightly. Party popper, however, had a good year. This is like a political poll, isn't it? Yes. Judith Collins down four.

Colmar Brunton. Yeah. Smiling Face with Smiling Eyes. Yeah. That's the one where the eyes are, you know, closed. Yep. That's fallen this year, along with Smiley Face with Heart Eyes fallen somewhat this year.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven. Eighth place, Smiley Face with Hearts. Up in the rankings this year. As well as number seven, Face Blowing a Kiss. Okay, yep, that's a classic. Not moving at all. Staying at six. It's called Folded Hands, but to me it's putting the hands together in a prayer.

Some people think it looks like a high five. Whatever you're using it for, it hasn't moved. Loudly crying face. This is the one with the tears literally streaming down. Moving up to place five this year. Well, doesn't that sum up 2021? Yeah. Thumbs up.

It's a classic and at number four, moving up a bit this year. Rolling on the floor laughing. Now that is the laughing face with the tilt. Oh, yep, okay. That isn't at number three. Red heart, number two. And retaining its place for the last three years at least are faced with the tears of joy.

That's my number one. It always is. It's my go-to. Can we just check in with Carlin at the social media desk? Is that uncool now? The number one emoji. Yes. So you're officially uncool because the Gen Zs are not using that

to say that they're laughing anymore, even though we're never laughing when we use it. We're using the little skull emoji because we're dead. It was so funny. Oh, right. Okay. I thought you were using the tilted laughing face. No, that's so chuggy.

Oh, no. Okay, shit. I either don't know that, Grandad. Right. Okay. So use the's so chuggy. Oh no, okay, shit. Either that or that, Grandad. Right, okay. So use the skull. Yeah. Right. But even though that means like death. Yeah, but it's like, oh my god, I'm so dead, that's so funny. But what if it's averagely funny? What would

you do? I don't know, I guess we're still using it. Or just like, ha. Just type a little ha ha. Just ha ha, okay, right. That's how I end most sentences actually, ha ha, instead of a full stop.ha. Just ha-ha. Okay, right. Yeah, right. That's how I end most sentences, actually. Ha-ha. Ha. Instead of a full stop.

Okay. It's a bad thing. What are any other quick tips of ones to avoid? I don't want to look chuggy to my chums. God, I hate that word. Born in the chuggy chums. I hate that word so much. Yeah, the word chuggy is pretty chuggy.

Yeah, like it's so bleh. Right. But nothing else to avoid? Nah, just don't be weird with the emojis. Yeah, what if I'm like, yeah, you're fire. Don't be that dad that's like awkwardly using the like smirky face because they think that's like a funny face, but it's like kind of creepy. It's creepy.

Yeah, I wouldn't use a smirky face. Or don't use the winky face when you're not trying to be flirty, you know? Yeah. All right. Okay, all right. Good tips. Good tips. Play ZM's flirty, you know? Yeah. Oh, right. Okay, all right. Good tips. Good tips. Play ZDM's Flesh, Vaughn and Megan.

Apparently Australians are the world's drunkest population. Doesn't surprise me. But there's been a global drug survey that's surveyed 32,000 people in 22 countries about their drug habits. Okay. Now, everything falls under that umbrella. You've got your recreational drugs.

Booze. Yeah. Yeah. Booze. One of caffeine's in there. Caffeine is a drug. Oh, yeah, it is a drug. Caffeine is a drug.

What about kombucha? What about kombucha? A-class. Yeah. It's been reclassed. Have a little bit of kombucha. Yeah. It's a little bit of booze in that sometimes, isn't it?

Low levels. Kombucha itself's an A-class drug now. Is it? Yeah. Right. To stamp out everybody's gross scobies. I love it. You can'tclass drug now. Is it? Yeah, in an effort to stamp out everybody's gross scobies. I love it.

You can't stand it. No, it's not nice. It's not for you, is it? You're all just buying into the hype when really, you know, you can't beat a good bottle of pop.

So, are we on this list? So, Australia was tied with Finland. Finland? Why did you put a D in Finland? No, Finland. Finland.

Australia was tied with Finland for the highest rates of people seeking emergency medical treatment as a result of drinking alcohol. That's terrible. I thought we would have been up there. Maybe they didn't ask us. We might have got lumped in. We might have got lumped in. I think we got lumped in.

Are you kidding me? I can't see us listed anywhere. I think we've been lumped in. So asked how many times they got drunk. Australia also got drunk 15 times a year, which was world leading. Really? Doesn't seem like. Is that like proper piss?

Not just like mildly. I'd say so, yeah. The French drank the most often, 132 days per year on average. Australians drank 106 times a year, only five days more than the global average. But when they did drink, they drank. Yeah, right. So, yeah, Irish people, they regretted drinking the most.

28.4% of people from Ireland who partook in the survey said that they had some form of drinking regret. 24.4% of Australians regretted drinking. Bit of anxiety there. So we were actually one of the, we were the third biggest respondents in the Global Drug Survey. New Zealanders. Yeah, and I'm looking through it now.

It is pages long. Fascinating. What other stats? Is there anything weird? They delve into, oh, okay, I'm onto the alcohol now. Frequency of drinking. Mean number of days that alcohol was consumed within the last 12 months. France, 132.

New Zealand, second, 120. Followed by the Netherlands, Hungary, and the UK. Australia is sixth on that list. I must have been reading an Australian-based news article. Otherwise, surely they haven't mentioned us because they're jealous. Because we beat them. Because we beat them. That's typical Australian, not mentioning when we beat them at something.

So they, um, Pleasure. This actually looks like a, looking over your shoulder, this looks like a very significant study. Very serious too. It's full on serious. Yeah. How important is the amount of fun you have with other people? 7.8% in Australia.

But then, so it goes pleasure, harm, fun. There are so many grass here. It's so overwhelming. What other drugs are in there? All of them. There was like a one on cocaine. It's too expensive. There's everything.

But yeah, we're in this. Right. What about poor man's cocaine? What's it? Raro. Raro. Raro. They don't break down a tropical Raro.

Oh, no. I'm a sweet navel orange guy if it's going up the old hooter. It's got to be sweet navel. All the other stuff burns. I don't sniff lines in Raro. No. Not anymore. Not anymore.

When you were a kid. Absolutely. I'm off the Rara. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six. Hey! So Tesla is a branch of Elon Musk-based business stuff that primarily deals with electric things. Like cars, solar panels.

They're doing the trucks. They're doing an electric truck. Eventually, I can't find it on their website. You've got your Model S. You've got your Model X. You've got all these different Tesla cars and a cyber quad. You're a big fan of his. You've got his internet.

Well, I'm not a big fan of his. You're just a fan of his internet. But I do admire the tenacity to be like, why can't we get internet from a satellite? Oh, it's so expensive. Get it done. Did you see Courtney Love Cobain at the weekendacity to be like, why can't we get internet from a satellite? Oh, it's so expensive. Get it done. Did you see Courtney Love Cobain at the weekend came out and said, because after, do you remember he had a go at Bernie Sanders?

He said, oh, I forget sometimes you're alive still. Yeah. He tweeted him. And Courtney said, hey, I've got some emails that I was blind CC'd on. You shush. She's got this email thread that he was in on and she's like... She was BCC'd. Yeah, and she's like, there's some shit in these emails

you don't want out, kind of thing. What? I know, absolute shots fired. How did Courtney Love Cobain get BCC'd? I don't know when this happened, but she's apparently got email threads. How interesting. Where he's no doubt saying something he probably shouldn't be

fascinating and now I need to see those well maybe she bought a cyber quad for the kids no because

Francis Bean's like 20 something yeah so the cyber quad for kids 1900 US dollars currently out of stock

it looks like a lot of fun although those tyres don't look like they'd do a great job in a muddy paddock right you might want to

just go on the lawn does it look space age I haven't seen it after all this chat you still haven't seen it oh okay that's cool it looks like something that would be

in like some kind of futuristic farming movie oh yeah it looks a little bit like the quad bikes if you've played

the Halo game series it looks a little bit like the quad bikes from that but I thought why stop there if you've played the Halo game series. It looks a little bit like the quad bikes from that. But I thought, why stop there if you specialize in electricity? These are the top six other Tesla products we need for Christmas. Okay. Number six, Tesla remote control cars.

Oh, yeah, okay. Go all day. Plug it into the same port as you charge your Tesla car. Is that something you'd do? You'd get one of those for Christmas. The batteries would run out and then mum and dad would say like, no, no batteries. No batteries, no charge.

But then you can. You can just plug it into the Tesla charging port and away you go. Number five on the list of the top six other electric Tesla products we need for Christmas.

A Tesla electric reclining chair for the post feed nap. Oh yeah. You jump in and it just knows exactly what angle you need to be kept on because sometimes if you lie straight down

you get a little bit of reflux because you've had a rich meal. And maybe it hovers so you don't have to get up when you go to the fridge. That's a great idea. For a new drink. It's a hover lazy boy. We could totally work at Tesla with these ideas. Yeah. You're like, fridge.

And it's like, it takes you to the fridge. The Tesla fridge is there. You've already made your order, so it's already, it's like a... Takes you to the fridge. The Tesla fridge is there. Yeah, it knows. You've already made your order, so it's already waiting for you. Left by the sun, it's my Mr. Christmas ham. It's got to be taken care of. Yeah. Number four on the list of the top six other Tesla products,

electric Tesla products for Christmas, the Tesla Christmas tree lights. Oh, okay. How's it going to reinvent those? Solar powered, I assume. Oh, yeah, nice. And a wacky shape, not your Tesla Christmas tree lights. Oh, okay. How's it going to reinvent that? Solar powered, I assume. Oh, yeah, nice. And a wacky shape, not your traditional Christmas bulb shape. Yeah.

Maybe a wacky shape like this motorbike. Number three on the list of the top six other electric Tesla products we need for Christmas, the Tesla taser. Oh, yeah. Not necessarily specifically for Christmas. Yeah, round use. But that's a problem when the police are tasering someone. They run out of batteries. No, solar powered. Well, they're shocking them problem when the police are tasering someone. They run out of batteries. No, solar power.

While they're shocking them, as long as they're in direct sunlight, it'll keep recharging. What if they're trying to tase someone at 2 a.m.? They use their charge from earlier in the day. They've got one of those Tesla home panel batteries attached to the table. Does that make sense? Number two on the list of the top six other Tesla products we need for Christmas are Tesla AA batteries.

You mentioned before that the batteries could run out. Well, with Tesla AA batteries, nope. Forever. Yep. I'm a fan. And then to recharge them, you just leave them out in the sun. Yeah. And the solar panel on the side of the...

What? Why couldn't that work? Why couldn't that work? Like a little solar panel on a battery. And when it runs flat, you just leave it. Yeah, but then the batteries are always in. It'd be very expensive for a battery, wouldn't it? But that's okay.

Like $1,000 for an AA battery. You just literally could buy 1,000 AA batteries. No, but it'd be a small, flexible solar panel. I was thinking like 20 bucks for a two-pack of AAs that never ran out. I don't know.

Solar panel, rechargeable. Check the patent office. Executive Internania, what are you doing? Can you run a patent check for me, please? Thank you. There's someone looking like,

that's a bloody cheat. I can't believe I've stumbled across my million-dollar idea right here, live on the radio. It's one minute to seven. It's a Google patent actually. Oh, fuck! U.S.

Google! 4-5-6-3-7-2-7-A. Self-charging solar battery. A self-charging solar battery comprising a rechargeable cell and a solar electric panel. Shit. Okay, it's done. Yeah. Okay.

You have all these great ideas and they're already gone. You always do this. I've got some images here of what they look like. Look at that. That's exactly what I was thinking it would look like. I know, and it does. That's exactly how I pictured it. I'd drawn that exact blueprint in my mind. Son of a... Application fired

by Curiel Raymond F in 1985. Well, do something with it. Or let me have the patent. Hurry up. Either way. You're too late. And number one on the list of the top six other Tesla products

we need for Christmas are electric ones. The Tesla Adult Fun Toy. Again, leave it in the sun. It charges itself. Yeah, but do you want to be leaving your...

It's nice and warm. Tesla Satisfyer Pro 4 in the sun. Yeah, but then it'd be nice and warm. They could call it the Quad Satisfyer because everything's like quad. Yeah, okay, right.

For these Tesla things as well. That is today's top six. Kia ora, I'm Simon Pound and I host Business is Boring, a podcast that reckons it's anything but. Join me each week as I chat with some of the most interesting and inspirational players in the Aotearoa business scene and learn what it takes to make it happen from accidental

entrepreneurs to the brains behind some of the country's biggest brands. If you're into business or want to be, then make sure you follow Business is Boring wherever you get your podcasts. Brought to you by the Spinoff Podcast Network in partnership with Sparklab. Play ZM. We want to know now when you've hurt yourself trying to impress someone that you thought was hot. Before we get to that, I think we should compile a list of

the most annoying couples of 2021. Yes, this couple, 100% on that list for me. Would be easily top five. Yeah. I have no interest in knowing anything about them. Kourtney Kardashian and Travis Barker sucking each other's faces would be up there as well.

Yeah. And before they broke up, sadly, this year, Shawn Mendes. Oh, Shawn Mendes and Camila Cabello were annoying. That was entertaining though for me To watch

Yeah Okay Well yeah okay Well you only need A couple more Go and put a Question box on Instagram Who's the most annoying

Couple of 2021 Why are you whispering to her She's got very sensitive ears Okay She's got very sensitive ears She's like a fennec fox Right okay Who spends a lot of time

In the desert They've got to hear this The predators coming of course Right If you She's like a fennec fox. Right, okay. Who spends a lot of time in the desert. They've got to hear the predators coming, of course. Right. If you've not seen a fennec fox, look one of those up. It will immediately launch itself into your top 10 favorite cute little animals. Okay, great. Anyway, back to annoying couples.

Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox would definitely be up there this year. I don't have a problem with what they're doing, but it seems like they're desperate that we all see it happening. Yeah. So he said when he was trying to impress her in the early days, he threw a knife up and then went to catch the knife because, I don't know. Like a kitchen knife or like a hunting knife. A sharp knife.

A very sharp knife because he cut himself. He cut himself so badly that he needed stitches. Right. Is this something he normally does? Is he a knife juggler? Or thrower? No. Okay, right, wow.

Another thing he did, so he's done two things trying to impress her that he ended up hurting himself doing. He tried to slide down a staircase rail and at the bottom of it he hit a giant spike and it rammed him. to slide down a staircase rail. And at the bottom of it, he hit a giant spike and it rammed him from behind. So she likes him because he's accident prone or he's a great source of entertainment for you? Yeah, I think just a great source of entertainment,

physical entertainment. But anyway, they're still together as they will more than happily let you know. But he's hurt himself twice trying to impress a hottie. So I was wanting to know this morning if anybody listening had hurt themselves trying to impress somebody that they found attractive. It's always, like you might not even know this person, right? You could just see them. And you think, oh, I might just do this.

Yeah, I might pop a wheelie on my BMX. And it just goes over. I could never do a wheelie. Never, ever. I was always so jealous when I saw someone doing an extended wheelie. I could ride my bike no hands. Me too. Have you tried it lately? Yes.

Hard. Very hard. Why is it harder as an adult? Everything's harder as an adult. I feel like if we'd continued to ride our bikes with no hands all through our teens and twenties, then you would have retained the ability to ride. But not now. Yeah.

So hard. But yeah, I could never do an extended wheelie. Well, maybe you were too busy looking at a hottie and you were trying to show off and you walked into a glass door. That can happen. Or something like that, or a window. Certainly. Certainly.

I imagine every time a bird crashes into a window, that's what they're doing. Yeah. They're showing off. They're trying to show another bird their plumage. Hey, look at my wings. And the other bird's like, watch out! And it's too late. It's too late.

They've just come. Yeah. Beaked window with the kitchen window. All right. Well, we want to take your calls now. 0800-DARLS-NM. You can text as well. 9696.

What happened when you were trying to impress someone hot? We're talking about when you've hurt yourself trying to impress somebody. Maybe. I mean, you would imagine they'd have to be a hottie. You'd have to consider them a hottie. I mean, beauty's in the eye of the beholder. But you'd have to consider them to be hot, to be hurting yourself trying to impress them.

Sean's called up. Sean, when did you impress somebody? Or when did you hurt yourself trying to impress them? Well, second time that I met my current partner. Her rubbish bin was overflowing, so the key thing to do

was jump on top of it. As I went to get off, it moved, and I fell headfirst onto the concrete. And she just stood there laughing, pissing herself. Were you bleeding from this smashing head on the ground? No, because she half-ass caught me with her foot. So you're falling, and she tries to boot you in the head while you're falling.

Yeah, pretty much. It was a cushion. It was a cushion the blow. Cushion the landing. The way I looked at it, it was just an excessive way of saying that I was falling for her. Oh, yeah, right. Okay. I see what you did there.

That obviously worked. I like it. I mean, you could have just taken the rubbish, the overflowed rubbish, and put it in the neighbour's bin. Nah, because the neighbour's a bit of a cower. Okay, yeah, right. She'd have a go, wouldn't she?

No, it's good, eh? You think the bin's full and you're like, I can get a bit more out of you, bin, and you stomp it down. Oh, exactly. But then if you stomp it down too hard, when the truck tips the bin upside down, it doesn't all shake out.

Oh, right. Okay, and then you're stuck with... Word from the wise there. Yeah, right. Okay, well, I mean, I'd obviously work... Stuck with the juice in the bottom of the bin. Obviously work, Sean.

Yeah. Still together now. Exactly. Okay, but that head trauma could come back to bite you later in life. Yeah, it could do. Let's hope not. Hope not.

Or just enjoy life, eh? Enjoy it while you can. Enjoy a great day. Thanks, Sean. Claire, when did you hit yourself trying to impress somebody? It was back in the day, back in the youth, when the Outback used to have these weird picnic tables to dance on in the inside. They were very sturdy, though, weren't they?

I wondered what happened to those tables because they were almost a rustic wood look. They look great as it had pissy outdoor furniture. Okay. Well, I might have been the reason because I was trying to dance to impress someone, but I don't think they could see me properly. So I was like, sweet as, I'm going to try and walk a bit further. But, you know, I had a few drinkos and there was a huge gap and I fell down the gap and bruised my leg real badly.

Oh, no. And the bouncer squatted me out in front of him. And, yeah, I didn't really hear from him or anything. So I thought, yeah, no, I better just leave that. Right. And so you never got to go on a date or anything with him? No, no. I didn't even say anything to him.

I thought that was pretty embarrassing. They gave me the big vivet on my arm. They gave me the big vivid and I thought, oh, no. Oh, they vivided you? Yeah, they kicked me out because they thought I was too drunk, but I was just really clumsy. Wow. I do love how the bouncer won't only take your dignity

in front of all those people. I mean, you fell, so your dignity was already on the way out the door, but they'll also graffiti you to be like, this person fell between two tables. Amazing clear things you call some messages in. Somebody said, during adult fun times I was trying to do something fancy and

I kicked his glasses right off his face and heard him wondering two things. Yeah. What was it? It was being fancy. We were probably trying to get a leg things. Yeah. What was it? Mm. That was being fancy. We're probably trying to get a leg over. Yeah, but then also, as someone who used to wear glasses,

I never left the glasses on during adult fun times. They get steamy. Yeah. Maybe they've got anti-fog lenses. Perhaps. Is that a thing? Can you get anti-fog lenses? I've never heard of them.

Okay, right. Yeah, because they get steamy like when you open the oven or the dishwasher and you get anti-fog lenses? I've never heard of them. Okay, right. Yeah, because they get steamy like when you open the oven or the dishwasher and you get a flow of hot air to the face and the glasses would immediately steam. Right.

I mean, if you're doing sex right, those things will fog right up from my experience. Sometimes even if you're not doing sex right, they'll fog right up. Right, okay. So either way, they're fogging. Oh, there's a lot of fogging. So it's no indication

if you're doing it right or wrong. Even if you've got a pumping HRV system, I believe that if the HRV's really humming that hot air from your ceiling space, this isn't a paid post for HRV by the way, although they do work fantastically, your glasses will still be

fogged during lovemaking. Okay. So by the way. Right. Although they do work fantastically. Your glasses will still be fogged during lovemaking. Okay. So either way there. Great. CDM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. Well, the first weekend of traffic lights, and for those in Auckland, the end of 100 and, what was it, 108?

Nine or 10 days? I don't know. Yeah, similar. Of being locked up. So it was pretty cool to go out and see everybody out on Friday night. I went out on Friday night, and it was kind of cool to be at a bar and restaurant where you know everyone in there is vaccinated.

Yeah, true. And you're not wearing a mask. Yeah. And it's like, cool. Carmen, you went to the movies. What was that experience like? Because I've got some movies I need to see. It was pretty normal, to be honest.

Are they spacing people out? Well, the cinema wasn't very full, so potentially. Right, okay. Because I heard the other year they're blocking seats kind of around. What did you go see? Dune. Dune. Oh, is it good?

Yes. Yes. I love a dystopian film, so I did appreciate it. I do love a dystopian film, so I did appreciate it. I do love a dystopian film. It's my favourite genre of film. But I felt like I needed prior knowledge. I didn't really follow the... Did you go with your boyfriend?

Yeah. Was he upset that you were leering at Timothee Chalamet? No, I don't think so. Was he upset Zendaya's only on screen for 10 minutes? I definitely was. She's on the bloody poster. Now, did you have any issues scanning in? Yeah.

So the guy was really having a struggle scanning my QR code. He insisted that I put my phone on the table because I think I was shaking maybe. And then just hovered over the QR code for a solid minute. So this is what I wanted to bring up and raise. And, you know, I'm not having a go at anyone because, you know, we're all... We're learning. We're learning.

We've got to have some patience. I'm absolutely feeling for those, you know, some hospital staff that have to deal with this. But I reckon the QR code's too small. Like, do you think that too? Yeah, like it took a long time for his little camera to focus on it. Yeah. You know, because it was quite small.

He was getting very close to the phone, but then obviously the screen reflection was bad. Yeah, and also people that are printing them out and laminating them, because I don't know if you find this when you go into a supermarket or a store, if they've laminated their QR code, sometimes all the light's shining on it. Sometimes you have to angle your camera. Right. So apparently people with laminated passes are also finding it takes some extra time.

To scan it. Because people have to kind of move their phone. We're learning, we're learning. Feedback, feedback. What I've done is I went into my email and I zoomed in on my QR pass that you can print out and I just took a screenshot and I've made it my lock screen wallpaper. And it's way easier for people to scan. But it looks real, like, yuck.

Yeah, does anybody ever be like, is that you? No, because when they scan it, it still comes up with your name. Right. And it's enough that, like, it's the same as if I was just zooming into my email pass and showing you, basically. And if anyone did have a problem, you can just open up your app, right, and show them. Oh, yeah, because I've just got my family there at the moment,

and they're not going to get me into a restaurant during a pandemic. No, on your lock screen, yeah. No. Well, no, I've just kind of been trying it out, and I reckon, yeah, I reckon it's too small. Could I get it printed on a T-shirt? Yes. And if I were to say, this is my going out T-shirt.

Yeah. Well, producer Jared is contemplating getting a tattoo of his QR code. Yeah. If it sticks around for years, I'd be keen. But it's very intricate, the QR code. It's lots of dots. It says on mine that it expires in May next year. So am I going to get a new QR code next year?

Or is it just going to update that QR code? Because imagine if you got a tattoo and then it got to May and it expired and that was out now. Yeah, well, I could start with like a square in the forearm and then if I get a new QR code, like twist my arm a bit and then eventually just have like a band of QR codes. Yeah, that'll look cool, dude. Yeah, dude.

That'll look dude. I don't think, but then if you had like one freckle in the white space, it could make it not valid. Or you scan your QR code and it's like, you've got skin cancer. You need to go and see a dermatologist immediately. But I don't know if you want to message the Prime Minister on Instagram and say maybe I think the QR codes are a little small. Do I want to?

Does she need that on a Monday? Probably not, no. She's got some other stuff. I could just not say they're small. I say, what are your thoughts on the QR code size? I just think I'm not the only one. I think a few people

over the weekend would have had that issue. My father-in-law had this issue when we went out for a meal with him but he'd also printed out his vaccine pass on the smallest piece of paper you could ever imagine and the entire QR code would have been no bigger than an inch by an inch and he was wondering why it was having trouble scanning.

Yeah, that's... I was like, it's too small. Yeah. He's like, mmm, they should have told me that. I was like, well I mean, okay. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. Agnostic. Doesn't know for sure whether any gods exist or not.

Atheist is someone who doesn't believe in the existence of any gods. Okay. Deities. Deities. Is that a flash word for gods? I just googled atheist. So I'd say I'm an atheist. Yes.

Would you say you're an atheist? I'm also an atheist. Because what's an agnostic is like, I'll just show, I'll believe in something if there's proof one day. Right. Or open to the idea, but. They just, no, they've got a,

they haven't, they haven't got a team. They'll watch the league, but they haven't got a team. Just whoever's winning. They'll watch the league, but they haven't got a team. Just whoever's winning? They'll watch the World Cup, but they haven't picked who they want to win yet. Right, okay. Is that what?

I don't know. Well, anyway, there's been a study done, and it's bad news if you are an atheist. Atheists are viewed as less desirable romantic partners. Probably because we're always making this noise. Ugh. Like that. noise. Ugh. Like that. Ugh. Ugh.

Somebody said, Mitch Brown, who wrote this study, said a litany of negative stereotypes exist around atheists, social value, despite what many would consider a surprising number of them in our society.

Now, this was out of America, this study. It studied a whole bunch of people and presented them a whole lot of atheistic tendencies and they listed them as someone that you wouldn't want to be in a relationship with. Because, yeah,

but they said positive stereotypes of atheists are fun and open-minded but people didn't consider them open-minded in the dating process. Okay. But I think it's probably more just with the noises. A lot of annoying noises. In the 2018 census, 48% of New Zealanders said no religion,

but that doesn't mean they're atheists or don't believe. That just means that they, yeah, might be atheist, agnostic, or believe in the presence of something without. For sure. Like chucking a dollar on their horse. That's a better analogy. A horse race. Okay.

No, because if you were like Christian, you don't believe there's any other horses apart from your horse. No, that's a bad. So that's a bad analogy. Bad analogy. Okay, so agnostics believe it is. No, if he's improved to them, a horse race is happening. I mean, you can see all the other horses.

Whereas atheists are like, there's no horses. There's no horse race. That's a terrible analogy. Whereas Christians are like, I've got a horse. He was a carpenter. Yeah. And his mother was a virgin. Right. Gotcha. Why are mother was a virgin. Right.

Gotcha. Why are atheists terrible lovers or partners? Well, no, we're not terrible lovers. No one said that. They're just more talking about like long-term. Right. And it was because of people have been told the negative stereotypes of atheists. Right.

Yeah. That we're what? Negative. I'm telling you. We're cynical. Too cynical. Yeah. That we're, what, negative? I'm telling you, it's the noise. We're cynical. Too cynical. Yeah, too cynical. It doesn't make for like fun long-term when the person is just like, they're more desirable

for short-term relationships. Right. Okay. Whereas people who believed in something apparently were more desirable long-term than atheists overall. Huh. Yeah. Interesting.

Not because they believe atheists were any less likely to cheat on you. Apparently that was equally spread. Oh, okay. Between people who believed in something and people who believed in nothing. Basically, if they had genitals and a sexual desire, they could very well cheat on you. Huh. But it's just, yeah, the negativity and the fact that they wouldn't just buy into things, blindly believe in love forever and stuff.

Right. Well, at least when we cheat, we're not going anywhere. What do you mean? Oh, like hell? Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's the deal. If you can't get into heaven because you don't believe in it, you can't get into hell if you don't believe in it.

Unless we're wrong. Oh, sounds like someone's agnostic there. Sounds like someone's wavering towards agnosticism. I've done a few things, Vaughan. You'll be there too, though, right? We're purgatory. I'll be in the ground or burnt and then ground and then spread somewhere and that will be the very end of my physical existence.

Okay. And the series of like electron and neuro, electro currents and neurons that created my consciousness will cease to exist because they're powered by the whole system and then that'll be me and I will exist no longer. And I'm happy with that. Right, okay. Have your kids asked what happens when you say that?

I told them this. That same thing? Yeah. And they were remarkably all right with it. Who's on the nice list? Sarah, good morning. Morning. Now, why are you on the nice list?

Well, I got married a couple of weeks ago. Okay. And so basically the story is we were outside in the car. It was pouring rain. First bridesmaid goes in. Second one goes in. I wait, you know, just waiting for the song to come on. Yep.

We'll hear it. And then I get to the point of walking in. Me and Dad walk in and the wrong song is playing. So basically we walk in and the song that we had picked for the signing, the registry song instead of the song, in case you didn't know. Can we ask what songs? Because I could probably, I'm getting emotional because, you know, I mean weddings.

I know you love weddings, don't you? What song were you supposed to walk into? In case you didn't know, the cover by Boyce Avenue. Oh, I don't know that song. In case you didn't know, by Boyce Avenue. Okay, I don't know that song. In case you didn't know, by Boyce Avenue. Okay, this song. Yeah. This song.

Yeah. Oh, that's lovely, isn't it? I could imagine that. Yeah, but no, that one didn't quite play. So what one was playing instead? It was called Blow Me Away by Corey Smith. That's lovely. That's very wedding, isn't it, that one? Blow Me Away by Corey Smith. That's love. That's very weeding, isn't it, that one?

Blow Me Away. I've only got Blow Me Away by Breaking Benjamin. Yeah, no, yeah, it's quite a non-song. My partner really likes it. Okay, hold on, hold on. I found it, I found it. Okay, so instead this was playing. Yeah.

Howdy. It's not. It's a walking song, though, but it's like a... No, it's not. Those two songs are poles apart. Very different. Oh, no. Okay.

Yeah. So who messed this up? Oh, well, that's the funny thing. Luckily, I found it funny, and then the DJ comes up to me later and he says, oh, someone told me I played the wrong song. And I was like, yeah, but it's okay though. Like, it's fine. And he's like, I just played in the order of your playlist.

And I was like, I only sent him the playlist so he got the right songs. But the email had the correct songs listed in the right order. Right. And so you're saying you're on the nice list because you didn't bite this DJ's head off. Exactly. I did not turn Bridezilla on him at all. And funnily enough, I did find out the next day that the music wasn't even playing when the first bridesmaid walked in.

I mean, I don't want to name and shame, but it almost feels like a service. Don't do it. But I'm just airing my thoughts here. We can avoid other brides going through this, Blake. No, he was great anyway. I think it was just got mucked up because it was a rainy day. But no, it was just, yeah. You're so understanding. You are so understanding.

I know so many brides that would have just absolutely bit his head off. I can imagine that same story, but you're on the naughty list. Yes. Because you absolutely let him have it. Alright, wait there Sarah. Ho ho ho! Who's on the naughty list? Hannah, good morning. Good morning.

Why are you on the naughty list? I'm on the naughty list for polar opposites to the nice list. Okay. My sister, her partner cheated on her. And when I went to go and help her pack up her house, I burnt a very bad word on his lawn.

How did you burn it on his lawn? I made a mixture of vinegar, salt and dishwashing liquid. That's actually a great environmentally friendly weed killer as well. Is it? Is it? That's how I know. I'm a rural girl. Hannah, what did this word start with?

C. Okay. I agree. What was the next? No, I think you go for the last letter next. How many letters in this word? Four. Four.

First one's C. Cock. He's not a very good cock. He's not a very good. Wow. So the worst C word you could burn into somebody's lawn. Yeah, and he loves that lawn. So this would be like burning Vaughn's lawn because you love your lawn, don't you? Yeah, and he loved that lawn. So this would be like burning Vaughan's lawn because you love your lawn, don't you?

Yeah, I do love the lawn. What were those ingredients again just so the next time I met Vaughan's? Vinegar, salt, dishwashing liquid. And a very specific ratio too because I messed it up once and it didn't do a good job at all. Very specific ratio.

Okay. Oh, I like both of these. This is hard. I want the listener to know this is hard. Yeah, tell them how hard it is. It's a real pickle. It's being in the middle of two great stories. I love both of these. Yep.

But for the 12 days of Fletchmas, I can't go past the lawn, Hannah. I can't go past it. The naughty word in the lawn. It's the naughtiest word. I love it. I love it. That's brilliant.

It's brilliant. Have you seen or know of his reaction? Yeah, he was very disappointed. So were his parents and his kids um, his kid's baby mama. Oh, wow. Okay. Brilliant. And it'll be there for a while too, won't it?

Oh my Lord. Even if you green spray painted where the grass had died, it'd still be obvious. Yeah, I'd probably just spray off the whole block. I'd just create a whole square. Yeah, I did it right by the front door. All right. Oh, good. Hannah and Vaughn, you want to open up this present?

Oh yeah, I've got it here. Ready? Ready. Great. Holy. Okay, it's got a face on it. You have won a Bondi Sands Everyday Skincare Pack featuring one of each product in their range,

12 total products and a Bondi Sands robe. Oh, my God. Recommended retail price of $317. The perfect gift for the self-care guru in your life. Congratulations, Hannah. Well done. It's paid off being on the naughty list this Christmas. ZM's Fleshborn and Megan.

Play ZM's Am I a Bad Person? We've received a message and they are keen. For Am I a Bad Person, I always imagine there's a bit of guilt there, but they want to know, is it misplaced guilt? Why is that guy out there rubbing that girl's back? He was giving her a pat. You know when you give someone a pat to make them feel better? Oh, yeah, right.

But they're too far away. He had to really reach his arm out to give her a pat. So close it to someone if you're going to pat them because it makes it look like they're shuffling away. Anyway, that's what's happening outside the window. But anyway, on the email, it reads, hey team, I was wondering if you could let me know if I'm a bad person or not.

Yes. We can let you know. Not yes, you're a bad person. During lockdown, I was feeling pretty lonely and in serious need of some adult cuddles. Will you ask the adult toy mega house. Mega warehouse? What's it called?

Mega toy. Adult toy mega store. Mega store. Yeah. That's what it is. They did an absolute thriving business over lockdown. They all did. All of them, yeah.

So you were not the only one in need of some adult cuddles. So when the traffic lights came into effect, somebody invited me around for some Netflix and chill and obviously I jumped at the opportunitoy. Okay. I've known this person for a while and my friends and I all know he's into me. But I really just needed

some lovin' for one night. Am I a bad person for sleeping with someone who I know is super keen on me even though I was just looking for a one night stand and this may have led them to believe there's more. Oh, I don't think he's going to care. He's got some too, right? Everyone's happy in this situation.

Yes. She's just feeling guilty. Well, we never said she was a she. Oh, okay. I'm just assuming. I'm just assuming. It could have been a he and a he, or a she and a he, but it was mentioned that he invited me around.

No, but she says, thanks, anonymous female, as she signs up. So it is a female. But would that have changed? Maybe, yeah. Perhaps. So she's feeling bad because what he thinks maybe there's a relationship possibility here. Well, I mean, there must be a little bit of guilt there, right? Yeah.

A little bit of post. I don't think he's going to care, is he? He's got some. He's happy. Right? He's in the same boat. But I can see that maybe he's, if he's liked her, liked her. He might have thought it might have been, well, maybe not like a long-term relationship,

but it might have been more than a one-off. This guilt thing. Horrible. I know. Horrible, isn't it? This has got Catholic upbringing written all over it. It's very. Producers, what do we think?

Producer Booth, is she a bad person for technically leading this guy on? Nah, I don't reckon. If he'd asked her on a 10-course degustation date. No one's making love after a 10-course degustation because you think it's a tiny bite. Sure, I'll go for the wine pairings. Do your worst. And then at the end of the degustation, you're like,

I was so full from eating bloody sea foam and cucumber juice. Also, never take anybody out if you're going on a date and you want some Netflix and chill afterwards. You don't take someone out on an Indian either because, you know. Oh, like an all-you-can-eat curry situation.

Oh, God. Even just a combo. Even a combo, I'm full after that. I don't know. We talked about, remember, what's that ingredient

in the curry that gets you to love making? Carl Wayne at the social media desk, what do you think? Um, nah. It's fine. She's not a bad person.

What if, I always, I'll do this, the boot was on the other foot and it was a male who knew a

female was into him. Oh yeah, you'd be all like, but he just had the one night

situation. Yeah, maybe there should have been a discussion before. Yes, this is like

at the optometrist where they're like, what's clearer? One or two? One or two? Sometimes you're like, one is clearest until you see two and then there's three and four coming as well so you could have a more... But surely he knows that she's not into something serious with him. If he's liked her for a

while, they've all known she's never acted on it before. We're dumb. I don't know if you've picked this up, but we're dumb-dumbs. We'll be like, oh, she's changed her mind. Lockdown made her realise I am the one. I reckon he should just be stoked that it happened once. So that's quite a unanimous. Until you bring up that point point though, Vaughn.

So we want to take your calls. 0800 dials at him. Text in 9696. Is she a bad person? Because she scratched an itch and he thought there might be more. She thinks he thinks there might be

more to it. Well, he's not like full on written her a letter saying I want to marry you or anything. All right. Well, let's know what you think. Am I a bad person? So a message in over the weekend from a listener. Yeah. She wants to know if we think she's a bad person. So somebody's obviously said to her, you shouldn't have done that.

She had a certain itch that needed scratching over after a long and lonely lockdown. I mean, a hundred and something days of lockdown. Yeah. Can't blame a girl. So traffic lights came into effect. Somebody invited her over for Netflix and chill. And this person has been known to them for a long time. And their friends and my friends and I all know he's super into me.

But I just needed loving for one night. Am I a bad person for sleeping for someone who I know is keen on me, me, but I just needed loving for one night. Am I a bad person for sleeping for someone who I know is keen on me, even though I was just looking for a one-nighter? Okay. By the way, we're allowing people over in red traffic lights, though. Are we allowed to in red? Yes, as long as they scan your QR code. And you check their pass.

Yeah. Right, okay. Check their pass. Just checking. All right, Kate, what do you think? Is she a bad person? Yes, 100%. Why though?

How's this happened to you? It's happened to me and I've done it to someone and it never, ever ends well. What happened first? Did you do it to someone first or was it done to you first? I did it to someone first. And were you like, oh, it's all right, they'll get over it. And then it happened to you and you were like, oh, yowch, that does suck.

Yeah, no, I felt really, really bad the first time and like still to this day regret it. And, you know, after that he was even more clingy and like expected it more sort of thing. And then stuff hit the fan and it did not end well. Okay. So then what do you think there needs to be a chat about expectations? Yeah, 100%.

Like, they needed to make it clear, like, this is a one-time thing. Like, no strings attached sort of thing. Especially if they're wanting to continue any sort of, like, friendship with them. Yeah, right. Okay. All friendship with them. Yeah, right. Okay, all right. Brilliant, Kate, thanks. Jade, what do you think?

Is she a bad person? Jade, what do you think? Yeah, I agree with the previous caller. I think if it was a male, we'd be having this conversation and everyone would be saying yes. So I think it should be the same for a myth situation. Wow, okay. Has this happened to you

or have you dealt this hand before? No, it hasn't happened to me and I haven't dealt the hand. I have seen it with friends though and it has been as a bystander really, really horrible to see somebody sort of crumble like that so I just don't think it's, she knows

that's why she's feeling guilty and she's written it and she knows. Okay, what if that had the chat though and she's like, look, it's been a long lockdown and I know you think there's going to be more, but this is just a once off. Do you think even then, because I was thinking if that was me, I'd still be like, oh, once off, but I can convince her that it's worth a repeat performance.

And then we're going to fall in love and get married and have children, of course. Makes her less guilty. Would make her feel less guilty if she had been a little bit more up front about it to begin with and said, hey, I'm just down for this one time. But like you say, I'm sure emotions would have become involved no matter what. It's like chucking a dog a treat and then they follow you around for the rest of the day wanting another treat. I said one treat.

I think that's another bad analogy to even have on the show today. I love bad analogies. Jade, thanks for your call. Anonymous, what do you think? Is she a bad person? I think she's not a bad person because if he really, really liked her, the first thing he would do

is not invite her around for Netflix and chill. Yeah, right. That wouldn't be the first move. He'd invite her on a date or something. Yeah, that's true. Right. Okay. And she's not responsible for him not being up front about his feelings. That's not her problem. Yeah, true. Yeah.

Yeah. I'd agree. I would absolutely agree. Yeah, right. Okay Yeah right Alright Anonymous Thank you Message is in No she's not No one can tell her How to feel

She's not feeling guilty Others are trying to Make her feel guilty Not a bad person The guy may have liked her But maybe only for the looks Now he can move on Maybe

Yeah Maybe We've invented this guy It's really just like I don't know We're putting a lot of words In this guy's mouth A lot of thoughts in his head.

Yes, she is a bad person. If it was a guy doing it, we totally wouldn't be having the same conversation. Unless you told the guy up front it was only a one-night thing, then she's a bad person. If she'd been a guy, then everyone would immediately say

he was the bad guy for doing this. Yeah, that's true. So yeah, absolutely not a bad person. He's probably just happy that he finally got there. Yeah. Yeah, who knows, maybe. After 110 days. And if he'd been like thinking about it forever and ever and ever and ever,

he may have had very high expectations. Yeah. And it may have fallen short. So he might be like, not for me after all that. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Just need to run. Can you put my auxilary out? I just need to run a quick pronunciation check.

No, that didn't work. Jävle bokken. Jävle bokken. What? Jävle bokken. Jävle bokken. Jävle bokken. Gävlebocken. What? Gävlebocken. Gävlebocken. Gävlebocken. Gävlebocken.

It's not G-A-V-L-E-Bocken. So I would have thought Gävlebocken. Gävlebocken. Gävlebocken. Okay. It's a Swedish word. It's a Swedish word and it stands for the Gullveig goat, which is a traditional Christmas display erected annually

at Slotstorget Castle Square in central Galve, which is a town in Sweden. So, Galve, Swedish town, Brocken goat. Yep, the Galve goat.

It's a giant version of the traditional Swedish Yule goat. Okay. They've got a Christmas goat. Yeah. Oh, I really like this about the Yule goat. Their Christmas decorations have always been a Yule goat. Old Father Christmas rides a goat, has a goat.

Often a goat pulls the sleigh. Really? So a goat's a very important animal for the festive season, but it is erected each year by local community groups, and every year it gets burnt or destroyed or pulled down. Now, you might be thinking, oh, is that the tradition? No, no, it is illegal. Burning or destroying the goat can land you a three-month prison sentence.

Right. As a 27-year-old man was served that in 2018. Or massive fines for pulling down the Yule goat. But it is also something that happens every year. It's almost like they say it's illegal, but it's a massive challenge to do it. And other people don't seem terribly upset that it happens because they know it's going to be an inevitability.

But then that time that guy got caught, was that just the police saying, huh? He got a suspended sentence. Oh, right, okay. So he got a suspended sentence, meaning he can't do it again. Right. So since 1966, the timeline begins. It has its own Wikipedia page of its timeline of destruction

and what security additions were added to the Gulliver broken to stop it happening. In 1968, a fence was added, and that year it survived. In 1969, inside of the goat was protected by chicken wire netting that did nothing to stop the inevitable fire. In 1976 years, six hours, so in 1976 hours, after the construction was completed, two drunk teenagers burnt the entire thing to the ground.

So it only lasted six hours. And then, so they burn it down, and then does the village celebrate the fact that it's happened? They all go and watch it burn down. Okay. They don't necessarily celebrate, but they're like,

well, it was going to happen. Like, right. People don't like that it doesn't last, but they also, no one seems to be like, this is so bizarre. No one's, there's never a lynch mob

to find out who did it. In 1971, it was smashed to pieces. 1972, it collapsed under its own weight, but they believe it was because somebody took out a crucial part that held it all together. In 1973, it was stolen. Wow. I feel like this needs its own Netflix documentary.

Yeah. The goat. Fascinating. The Yule goat. Destroyed by fire in 74. In 1979, after the first goat was burned, a second goat was fireproofed. Okay.

But then it was smashed to pieces. Oh, okay. 1980, they didn't bother with the fireproofing, and it burnt again. 1981, a rare survival. The next survival happened in 1988, and that was only because it was heavily fireproofed and enclosed by a two-meter high fence around the entire thing.

So they started attacking it. Why don't they just put some red badge security on it? Well, that's what they did in 1990, and it survived that year. However, they thought after one year of its success, they got comfortable, and then in the next year it was burnt down. Eight days after it was put up in 92, it burnt down. They put up another one, and it got burnt down too. It then survived two years in a row being heavily guarded.

However, then on the morning of Christmas 1995, another one was burnt down. Two more years of survival after being monitored by webcams. Oh, okay. In 1996, early use of webcams. In 97, it was damaged by fireworks, but not destroyed. And then a series of fires saw it not survive again until 2002. Right. It survived, and then three more years of fires,

a couple of years of survival, and then a whole bunch of fires. Great. In 2011, it survived the fire Only because it was sprayed with water To create a coating of ice Making it very hard to sit on fire Okay And then in 2013 Soaked in flame retardant

It has survived In the years 2017 After double fencing Cameras And around the clock security guards There was taxis parked around it To stop people being able to get close to it. This is full on.

Yeah. What a mission. In 2019, do you know what was added to it? Apart from, you know, around the clock security? A canine unit. And in 2020, it survived. It had guards, double fencing, 24-hour CCTV, public webcam feed, 24-hour security guards, and two canine units.

Oh, it's impossible now. And 2021? Yep. Currently standing. Oh, okay. Currently standing. And I bet there's a web feed for that somewhere too. There might be, yeah.

It doesn't say, well, last year there was. There definitely was. So if you want to keep an eye on the Galvea goat, you can see whether or not this year it will be destroyed. As since the tradition began, it's been destroyed more than it survived. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Well, Facebook are trialing something.

Facebook Messenger are trialing something in the US next week that they're hoping to roll out around the world. And it is the ability in Facebook Messenger to split bills with your friends and payments. So, for example, you go out with friends, one of you pays the restaurant bill, and then you split it up in the group chat, in your friend chat.

What do they call that? Venmo. Is this what Venmo is in America? Because people are always like, I'll Venmo you or I'll Venmo me. There's lots of different ways you can make payments to friends and stuff. Like banks here do things, have ways that you can do that. But the built-in bill splitting feature is targeting friends and also like flatmates.

So the power bill comes in and you just like split it in the group chat. Right. But obviously Facebook in October launched a crypto. Well, they launched a digital wallet and payment system. Novi, that's what that's called. And then they also have their fingers in a few crypto and coin, you know, things as well. It's all a bit above me. I don't really know too much about cryptocurrency.

But the idea is they're trying to really, they haven't infiltrated our lives enough. They want more. Now they want our our lives enough. They want more. Now they want our money as well. They want to be on every avenue. Yeah. So I don't know if you want to give in just yet and be making all your payments on Facebook. Right. But yeah, it's the way it's kind of going.

Yeah. I mean, yeah, just try to get out of Facebook as much as I can. I had some cash in my hand the other day. Was that weird? It's weird when you have cash, hey? It was a bit weird. Just holding a $20 bill being like,

you look like a drug dealer. Because when I see people with cash, I'm like, you're drugs. Yeah, everything about me screams drug dealer. Yeah, it does, yeah. Look at me.

Look at this guy. It really does. It really does. If I was peddling a drug, what would it be? I think I'd have some vet stuff. I'd have some vet stuff. I'd have some stuff from the vets.

Instant coffee sachets? Yeah. That you've stolen from hotels? Caffeine, yeah. That's it. Sweet little, do you want a little hit? Do you want a little morning bump? I'll take two sachets of Makoto.

I've only got decaf left. Oh, no. It's been a great day for me. I've been peddling lots. Play ZM's Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. Fancy Feast Festive Felines. Well, we're giving you the chance to win on the lead up to Christmas. All thanks to Fancy Feast with our festive felines.

You've just got to register at ZM online with a photo of your cat looking festive. Whether it's in the tree, snuggled in between the presents. Maybe it's dressed up as pussy claws. I can never, I would never, I can't put anything on my cat. Like a collar. I want to put it like a bow tie on. I'm not into it. Yeah.

So I think a Santa hat would be out of the question. Bryony, good morning. Good morning. Now you entered and you submitted a festive feline photo of your cat Lulu in the Christmas tree. Yeah, literally in the Christmas tree. He was like only a couple of months old then and he just disappeared totally in the tree. Oh, I know. That's such a young age.

And now they'll climb the tree. They'll tip it over, won't they, when they get big? I know, yeah. That looks like an artificial tree too. So, you know, they're not overly weighty. No, they're not. Yeah, literally. On Boxing Day, it was falling to bits. Does your cat have

blue eyes? Yeah, he does actually. It's really mysterious. Yeah, really like... Gorgeous. Gorge, absolutely gorge sprydy. Hey, we've drawn you out today, so you have won a prize for you and a Fancy Feast prize pack for your cat. So Lulu's looked after for Christmas.

You can mark the occasion this Christmas with a Fancy Feast, a superior range of high-quality gourmet meals. And for you, because we have a prize for you as well, Bryony, $500 petrol voucher. Oh, my gosh. Wow. Awesome. Thank you. That's taken care of the fuel over Christmas, wow. Awesome. Thank you. That's taking care of the fuel over Christmas and New Year's. Well done. If you'd like to register, we'll do

another draw tomorrow. Go to ZM online and upload a photo of your fancy feline. All thanks to Fancy Feast. ZM's Fletch, Ron and Megan. Just looking up the NCEA timetable here, dudes, just to see what we've got going. What are we, 6th of December?

Nah, they'll be done by now, won't they? They'll be done by now, won't they? I've got no idea. They'll be, oh, no, no, no. Vaughan, you're dead wrong. Art, history, and today-o. Is that today's? Japanese, social studies, psychology, Latin, classics.

Yeah, there's a whole lot happening. Classics this afternoon. Good luck with a bit of classics. I got to help you out there. Yeah. Isn't it all vases and penises? Yeah, a lot of crockeries and the other things. So I imagine the exams are like,

whose penis is this on this ancient crockery? Yeah, that's Dionysus. Right, easy. That's a Dionysus doodle right there. Why can't they do psychology at school? That's good, that's good, that's good. That's imagining a tip. All these kids will be psyching you out with their psychology tips.

Science tomorrow. Making music tomorrow. Making music. Okay. That sounds like a school holiday class course rather than... Some more in Spanish later on this week. Some home economics. Some German.

Some Germans. Well, it turns out only half the people are tuning up to these exams. Yeah. Particularly in areas that have been locked down for long periods of time, like the Waikato, Auckland and Northland. One example given by a principal said that there should have been 54 turn up for English. Eight have shown up. Last week for maths, there should have been 31 and six showed up.

So tell me that percentage, if this is maths. What's the percentage there? So apparently Auckland, Northland, and parts of the Waikato. That's crazy. So it doesn't mean that they don't get a mark. They do. They just get an assessed mark, right? Yes, there is a rule called the unexpected event grade

for any exams that you miss. And apparently some are making the most of that. So how do they get that? Because isn't that based on your work through the year? So if you're dumb, like I was dumb at maths. That's why when it used to be so how it used to

gather around how it used to work, fifth form, which is year 11 was called fifth form, and it was school C, and that was all exams. Sixth form was all internal assessment. So people who silly-billied the entire year and then just like crammed in the last few weeks

didn't do as well when it was all internal assessment and then went back to a mix for the last year of high school. But now it's yeah, in these situations it would be from your work throughout the year. I would have taken my chances with an assist mark because I was rubbish at everything. Just roll the dice. And then if they ring you, they're like,

hey, hey, hey, look, I'll give you a spoiler alert. Your work throughout the year is definitely not enough to get through. You need to come in and give this exam a go. Yeah. So, yeah, some principals have said only, yeah, 20% to 25% of eligible students have been showing up. Wow, that's hardly any.

Yeah, I know. But then also if you'd missed a third of the year because of lockdowns, you wouldn't know half the. Totally. Principals also said they just weren't surprised that as many students were opting not to sit their exams and were going for the unexpected event grade. Hmm.

Yeah. And some had achieved excellence as well throughout the year. Yeah. So they just didn't need to. They're like, well, the unexpected event grade's going to do it without the stress of the exam. Well, look, look, kids, if you're listening and you're thinking about going to exam and all,

I went to a maths exam and got 40%, so I wouldn't bother. You know, I'll tell you what bloody else. Life's one big unexpected event grade. You don't know what's around the corner, all right? Yeah. You'll be fine. Yeah, you'll be all right.