ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 6th October 2021

Episode Date: October 5, 2021

Facebook Outage  Carwen's Hook  Top 6: Wellington Air  Couch Guy  What do you eat raw?  It's Beginning to Look a lot like Christmas  Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The ZM Podcast Network. Clay. ZM's Fletchbourne and Megan. Hello, welcome to the Fletchbourne and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe, barista made coffee available from drive-thru and McC delivery at level 3 and also dine-in at level 2. That's the heavy breathing of a man who ate another large portion of cake yesterday. I saw this cake. Caramuk.

I heard murmurs. Car saw this cake. Caramel. I heard murmurs. Caramel cake. Yeah. But Shaday bought a block of caramel to make the cake, but then we opened it to eat a little bit, and we ate too much of it, so we need to get more caramel. But I went to the dairy, and they had that Milky Bar Gold. Now, I'd heard you'd say good things about Milky Bar Gold.

Good stuff. So I was like, I'll give this a go. I think they actually like it better than caramel. It's their kind of caramelized Milky Bar. Gold. Good stuff. I think I actually like it better than Caramilk. It's their kind of caramelized Milky Bar. Yeah. I reckon it's better. It had a fudge quality to it. A Russian fudge quality to it.

A little bit. Yeah, you're right. Delicious. Not as sweet as Caramilk. Like, I had a whole block of Caramilk and I'm like... Yeah, that's because it's a whole block of Caramilk. Whereas I had a whole block of Milky Bar Gold and I'm like... Could have some more. S have some more Slightly less

It was so good This cake looked good The cake was caramel heavy And then the icing was like a glaze And it was entirely caramel With a bit of cream or something Cannot help but notice you didn't bring any in here I mean I think this is the best.

Thank you. I'll bring some in tomorrow. Is there still some left? Yeah. Oh, I thought that was all gone. No. We did practice some sort of restraint. There's four of you.

That's a quarter each. That's not much cake. A quarter each. The kids ate a bit of it and they're like, oh, this is yum. August is like, I liked it when it wasn't cooked better.

She's a cake batter. She's a cake batter. She's a cake batter gal. Yeah. Yeah. So that's on my wife's Instagram account. Don't make it if you're in any way trying to look after yourself because I feel like I took like three years off my life with it. Worth it though because those last three were going to probably be shit anyway.

Yeah. Well, that's a sign of a good cake. Play. ZM's Fleas for an American. Worth it, though, because those last three were going to probably be shit anyway. Yeah. Well, that's a sign of a good cake. Thanks, Rachel. Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fleetspawn and Megan. Morning. Good morning.

Happy hump day. You're mad. The top six You didn't get a ticket on the way to work today No, no ticket on the way to work today That's good That's what happens when you stick to the speed limit As it turns out Also I might be in line for 35 demerit points

35? I know Antonio, how many do you get in there? 100 But you've got two years of clean record Yeah Otherwise it accrues Yeah

And it counts and you start again from your latest inheritance of demerit points Can you go and like clean the police cars to earn some more back? Like do some chores? Oh that's community service, eh? Yeah, I think so. And I don't think it works like that. It would be good if it did. If you could do some good for the community.

Yeah, because I saw a dirty police car the other day and I said, God, no pride in that fleet. I'm surprised they weren't... Who's cleaning those? Written on the back, plain May or something. Yeah, or just take it through the car wash when they... Well, you probably get the aerials stuck on the floppy bits May or something. Yeah, or just take it through the car wash when they, well, you probably get the aerials stuck on the floppy bits.

You get the lights stuck on them. Oh, yeah, yeah, no, it'd be a hand wash. It'd be a hand wash.

Yeah, but get some criminals to do it, or people like you, and then you'd be like, all right, Vaughn has two demerit points for cleaning the patrol car.

I'd just do it because I would like to have a tittle around with a police car. And then you're like, We said not the sirens. I didn't mean to. I was running out the window.

You were doing the cleaning on the controls. I was dusting the controls. The top six coming up on the show. Lights on. Whereabouts is the bird leaving to pop the bonnet? Come on, just come and ask us. I was going to, but this was quicker.

Let me learn. God, do you want me to do this or not? The top six ways to keep the noise down at Bloody Wellington Airport. Someone was trying to enjoy a nice spa and the plane was on the runway. How inconvenient. Did they buy this house not knowing there's an airport next door?

I assume the airport was there first. Right, because there'd be very few people that live around that airport that were there first. Very few. You'd assume. Very few. So, yeah, the top six ways to keep the noise down. All right, also coming up, 7 o'clock, your next shot at $50,000 secret sound

at our $50,000 secret sound. Current jackpot, $10,000. And our secret sound, this is it. The sound that is already starting to do people's head in as they deep dive into it, figure out what it could be. All thanks to Neon, the activator just before 7. Next, the great Facebook outage of 2021. It was a ride.

What happened? What do people say about it? Next. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The great Facebook outage of 2021. Yesterday, seven hours Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp were down. I was like, this is great. Zuckerberg will be losing money.

$8 billion. Stupid sunscreen face. Yeah, but then I was like, oh, this is great. Zuckerberg will be losing money. Eight billion dollars. Stupid sunscreen face. Yeah, but then I was like, then I was like, our KiwiSaver's probably got Facebook shares. Oh, I didn't think about that. So we probably lost out as well. I'm pretty sure it'll bounce back.

Yeah. Unfortunately. So apparently someone broke that down too. They were losing $160,000 a minute Or $2,670 per second I always just think of that scene Whenever Facebook goes down in the Facebook movie Yeah

Where he yells at the Eduardo He yells at Spider-Man doesn't he Yeah So apparently the reason it went down was It's domain name system and border gateway protocol Those things that come up when the internet doesn't work Basically someone In your browser Yeah Down was its domain name system and border gateway protocol. Those things that come up when the internet doesn't work. Basically someone's... In your browser.

Yeah. Cookies, is it? It's like the address book for the internet. Yeah. And it removed itself from the address book from the internet. Yeah. So it did it itself. It wasn't a hack.

Apparently it did it itself. Yeah. Well, that's what they're saying. Yeah. I mean, they're not going to tell you they were hacked. No. That seems very fishy, given the stuff that we've learned about Facebook

in the past couple of days from the whistleblower. But they haven't admitted that they were hacked. So that was, I mean, it's very complicated, but that's essentially the problem. And, oh, the memes yesterday were good. Oh, yeah. If Facebook is the first instance of self-aware artificial intelligence,

it's going to be so septic. It's going to be like Ultron and Avengers. It's going to be like the only way that humanity can be ensured peace is if I kill them all. That would be such an asshole. Yeah. They'd be like, sorry, guys. I've read your comments.

You've all got to go. Snoop Dogg tweeted yesterday, Instagram down, roll one and be productive. So many great memes. Chrissy Teigen said, everything's down. Honestly, take it all away from us. Did it have like a freeing moment? Yeah, I think a lot of people did. And a lot of people also said, do you think that this much of the internet should be owned by one person or one company?

Yeah. That's a good call. People were just like, oh, yeah, this is bad. Yeah. Because, you know, there were people that were ringing Spark and Vodafone yesterday saying the internet's down. Give me my data. My data's not working.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because everything they went to. Everything they went to, which was just WhatsApp, Instagram, Facebook, didn't work for them. And they didn't even try their browser. They didn't even try another app. They were like, well, that's it. The internet's down because that's all they use. Isn't that just crazy? One company. Wow.

Because we discovered we didn't have everyone's phone numbers because we don't text all the time. Yeah. So we were like, ooh, we better get Because we're just messenger each other, don't we? Yeah. Group chats, messenger. It was down for a little bit. It's so weird. Wild. It's were like, ooh. Because we're just messenger each other, don't we? Yeah, yeah. Group chats, messenger. It was down for a little bit. It's so weird. Wild. It's got us, man. Yeah. I mean, when it was down

I was like, right, that's it, I'm not going back. And then it came back and I was like, oh my god, what was everyone doing? Tell me. You're quickly back in the habit, eh? Alright, the secret sound coming up, all thanks to Neon. $10,000. The current jackpot, the activ thanks to Neon, $10,000. The current jackpot, the activator, coming up at $7,000.

But next, what Russia has bet Tom Cruise to? Hell, we won't be happy about it. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. It's me. What did you point at her for? I don't know. We were just talking to Megan, so I was like, ah! The Russians. Oh, my God.

As this New York Times article says, the first dog in space, the first man in space, the first woman in space, and now the first film filmed in space. But they're the first woman in space too. Yeah. I shouldn't come down alive. They were just like, get in this rocket. Get in this rocket, woman.

I don't want to get in the rocket. Get in the rocket! Will they be coming back? No, of course she came back. Will they be returning to family? No! Get in the rocket now! Yeah, first woman in space Why is there nothing?

But they didn't land on the moon first, did they? I, no So a Russian actress, Yulia Sherepild Is going up I've just googled her Guess how many results on Google she has How many? One

What the No one has one result on Google No one But she's an actress No one has one result What?. No one. But she's an actress. No one has one result. What? Okay, is she a fake actress? Did they wipe her existence?

Look, I copied her name from the New York Times article and pasted it in. She has one result. What about if you put actress? No, but how is that possible? That's defining it even more. Oh, wow. Have they made a spelling mistake in the New York Times article, but then even then you can spell it. It's almost docked. Oh, right. Okay. The astronauts at the International Space Station uploaded a photo three hours ago

saying welcome to the International Space Station and it's their rocket getting closer. We've already prepared dinner for you. And she's not a trained astronaut. She's just an actress and the plan is to film a movie over like the next few weeks. Yeah. So her, a director, Klim Shapenko,

who probably has zero Google results, do any of these people exist? Conspiracies. And a veteran Russian astronaut. Okay. They launched to get to the International Space Station. Now, this was something that Tom Cruise had apparently planned to do. Who's he going up with?

Elon Musk or Dick Rocket? No, because he's going to the International Space Station. I don't think he's going with Dick Rocket. Because Dick Rocket, Jeff Bezos from Amazon, is taking up William Shatner's Star Trek. Yeah, Star Trek. Captain William Tiberius Kirk. Who's like 90.

90 years old. He'll be the oldest man in space. He tweets like a 20-something-year-old. Who's like 90. 90 years old. He'll be the oldest man in space. He still tweets like a 20-something year old. He's very, yeah, it doesn't look his age. He's very with it. Yeah, very with it. Very with it. So, yeah, he's going to space.

Which I think is pretty cool. But he was just going up to be the oldest person in space and to go where no man has gone before. Bit of a Star Trek buzz. But, yeah, I thought Tom Cruise was going to film a Mission Impossible. Well, yeah, I don't know. Unsure. Filming in space.

Tom Cruise filming in space. They took too long, didn't they? Yeah, he mucked around. Yeah, Russians beat Tom Cruise as the first movie to film in space, although he had plans to, yeah, film in space. But then if... Oh, he was going with Elon Musk.

He was. Okay, right. Okay. So, I mean, if that's Mission Impossible, because have they wrapped that? He was doing the next two back to back. Oh, right. So it might have been in the next one. Right.

But they haven't finished yet. But that's like the space race continues. Right? This is what it was all about in the 50s and 60s, post-World War II. Yeah. Russia and America racing for who can get to space. Now they filmed in space. What next?

Just seems like a big ego trip though, right? Oh, you're with all the billionaires involved now. It definitely is. Yeah, because Bill Gates the other day said, hey guys, there's still got a lot to do here on Earth. And Dick Rockets is like, I don't care. Can we work out where we had this place? That's like...

That's a wild move. It really is. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. I am awaiting like eight online package, online orders. Was it you or was it Executive Intern Anya yesterday during or after the show said, God, things are just turning up and I don't even know what I've ordered.

It's such a surprise. It's such a surprise. What is it today? Oh, that's right. You're not the only one. I see couriers everywhere. Yeah. And it's quite hectic.

But if there's like a pickup option, I would go for it. But a lot of them don't have that. A lot of it's just delivery. There's a lot of delays too, like the milk that I got sent yesterday. The what? You got sent milk? Oh, yeah. A PR company said, can we send you some milk?

I'm like, sure. And they're like, oh, it's this new recipe. I won't say which one it is because I don't think it reflects badly on them. Right. But I think it's very funny. But they said, and this was like 10 days ago,

can we send you some milk to try this recipe? And if you like it, will you tell people about it? And I was like, yeah, sure. We'll take some milk. Who's going to turn down milk?

White gold, baby. It's free milk, yeah, sure. So yesterday, a courier pulls in and I'm like, what have you ordered now? And Charlotte's like, I'm keeping a pretty good track of what I've ordered and nothing.

And then this box gets put out and I'm like, what is this? And I open it up and it's the milk. And I'm like, ugh. And those little ice packs that are in cool delivery things, they're warm water. They haven't popped. They're still in there things, they're warm water. They haven't popped. They're still in there, but they're warm water. And I pulled it out, and the best before on the milk said the seventh.

And I was like, usually you get milk with like 10 days, two weeks lead way on best before. And so I was like, before I put this in the fridge, I better check the temperature. So I was literally getting my barbecue probe to check the temperature of the milk, and I opened the lid, and I was like, no need to check the temperature. Yeah. So I was literally getting my barbecue probe to check the temperature of the milk and I opened the lid and I was like no need to check the temperature. It was like I could see from the top it was lumpy.

And then I did that thing where I didn't think and I just started pouring it into the sink and I was like videoing it. And I got to the end and Charlotte's like have you finished videoing? I was like yeah. And she's like you didn't think about how much that's going to stink? I was like, yeah. And she's like, you didn't think about how much that's going to stink? I was like, oh, man.

Just all for the video. I can play you the sound because you guys watched the video. It was delayed that long that it went off, basically. I was talking to her actual courier about it as well when she dropped something off. I was like, you guys must be absolutely under the pump. She's like, it's insane. Yeah. It's insane.

She said it's busier than last time. Okay, I'll just see if you can hear this. Okay, that's not how milk sounds. It's so lumpy. Yeah, well, if there's a click and collect option, you want to do it because nothing gets the couriers. They're just under the pump. And so that's what Carween at the social media desk did.

You went for a wee shop at where? Oh, wrong one. Whereabouts? Kmart. Yeah, good old Kmart. Oh, wrong one. Whereabouts? Kmart. Yeah, good old Kmart. Because my flat and I have decided that once we get out of all this, we can't wait to go for a little late night, just wander around Kmart. I just miss the wander.

You go in for one thing and you end up with a trolley. Or in my case, just go in for nothing and leave with 50 things. Yeah. Okay. So what did you order? So I ordered some command hooks because I need to put some art up on my wall, a couple of clothing items, a couple of plates.

And that was all good, paid, everything, got confirmation. And then I got a text saying that some items had been refunded. Turns out that everything had been refunded except for one command hook. Like a picture hook. One of those 3M-y things. Yeah. Chuck on the wall. Instead of like, do you

find this, because I've done a couple of Kmart orders too, and you order it it says it's there and after you've ordered, paid and everything, it sends you an email later being like, oh sorry, everything you wanted is not available. Yeah. Classic for doing that.

And then the refund always takes like five days. Yeah. So you, what did you do then? So I was like, well, I'll try and make another order so that hopefully I can pick two up at the same time and I won't look like an idiot. Yeah. Yeah, that whole order got refunded as well.

This seems like a wildly flawed system came out of running and they let you order things they don't have. Yeah. I imagine they're just busy, right? Doing lots of orders. It's just like an online shopping wrinkle that should have been ironed out years ago. It's probably in the computer system,

but by the time they go out to the shelves, someone's shoplifted it. So it hasn't been accounted for. But no one's in the shops at the moment, at the Auckland shops. Yeah, this is how much you've got to catch up. Well, then catch up. You see that lady at the front of the stood there?

She's always on the lookout. She's looking. She doesn't get all of it. Well, you know who does better than that? Who? JB Hi-Fi. Right. That person on the way out, they look like the TSA. Sometimes I feel like they're going to tell me

to take my shoes off and step into the body scanner. Make sure I'm not smuggling out a CD. From the bustling ZM think tank, this is the Top 6. Hello! Jeff Weir is a Wellington man Wrestling ZM Think Tank. This is the Top Six. Hello. Jeff Ware is a Wellington man who enjoys a soak in his spa. Oh, lovely.

He was taking an unusually late soak in his spa when he found himself basking in the sound of a turboprop rumbling on the runway for 90 minutes at nearby Wellington Airport. Was it waiting to tank off? For 90 minutes. There must have been some issue there. So apparently this was a breach on September the 28th. There has been emails exchanged between Jeff.

You'll remember him from earlier. He enjoys a long soak in the spa. And the airport's noise complaints team. And there was a misunderstanding of rules by an out-of-town team of engineers. Oh, so they were just working on the plane? Yeah. Maybe. Or something.

The engine run was to change the fuel control unit of the aircraft, which was done between 8 and 10. Right. Because there's curfews and time limits. That's probably late. I'd best sleep. Well, you remember Jeff was having a spa

at the time. Does the spa make a hum with the jets going? Who knows? Yeah, turn the jets on. Yeah. Turn the bubbles. Yeah, yeah.

Living by an airport, it turns out you'll hear planes. So I've got the top six ways we can keep this bloody noise down, this racket down at Wellington Airport. Okay. Number six, Wellington Airport buys all the residents around them air muffs. Waterproof ones. Yeah.

Because you'll remember Jeff from earlier. He loves a spa. He loves a soak in a spa. He loves it. So air muffs for everybody. Maybe you could even buy some of them with a little radio in it if you're into that vibe.

Oh, that would be lovely. Maybe Bluetooth. Jeff put on some soothing music in the spa pool. He sure would. What do you think Jeff would listen to?

Love Songs Till Midnight. Some love songs here, okay. With either Gail Ludlow or Raylene Ramsey. He had time for them both. Right. And every now and then he'd make a request

for his love, the spa pool. Okay. And every now and then he'd make a request for his love. Yeah. The spa pool. Okay. Are they still doing Love Songs Till Midnight? No. Oh, Gail Ludlow.

Where's Gail at? She was the best. It was an absolute Love Songs to an answer. Someone in this country must be doing Love Songs Till Midnight. She has such a soothing voice.

I wish someone had given me a love song Like a dedication It was all just lonely truck drivers Wasn't it? Steve you've got a dedication to me Yeah g'day Ray Lane Well I can't be with my wife Tonight

But I wanted to know I love her dearly It's so cute And I'd like to request Shania Twain But I wanted to know I love her dearly. It's so cute. Yeah. And I'd like to request Shania Twain. One of them romantic ones from Shania Twain. Number five on the list of the top six ways to keep the noise down at Wellington Airport. Can't Peter Jackson just do something? Seems like something.

Put up a wall of soundstage or something. Can Peter Jackson just do something? Yeah. What's he up to? Can he step up and do something? Number four on the list of the, by the way, if I was on Wellington City Council, that would be my answer to everything. The water pipes need replacing. Well, what's Peter Jackson doing?

He could pay. Yeah. He rocked around here making millions off all of us. So, I mean, what's he doing? Does he want water? Cut his water off until he fixes everybody's pipes. Number four on the list of the top six ways to get the noise down at Wellington Airport, tell the planes to shut up.

Has anyone tried that? Oh, I don't know if they have. Or shush if you're feeling like a more polite approach, or if they just ask them politely to keep their noise down. Could they just take off at half speed, maybe? They could just, yeah. Which brings us nicely to number three on the list of the top six ways to get the noise down at Wellington Airport. Electric planes.

Oh, yeah. Well, they're working. Like hybrids. You know when hybrids sneak up on you and all of a sudden they're right behind you? Yeah. I saw a Toyota Prius. Did you see this? It was when we were leaving work the other day.

It didn't have a muffler. Oh, what? Do you know how cars are insanely loud when they don't have a muffler? Yeah. So this Prius, I'm like, I'm like, where is that coming from? And the only other car around was this Prius. I'm like, it can't be coming from the Prius.

And then we set up the lights and there was no noise. I was like, There's a motorbike I can't see. Yeah. And then the Prius took off. I was like, Loud ass. You know there's a real problem with modified pre-i.

Friday night drag racing. Oh, absolutely. It's a real illegal street race. Is there a real issue? So then I looked at the back of the Prius, and yeah, there was no exhaust pipe. And I was like, oh my God, it's mufflers been pinched or whatever. You know how people pinch that thing, the catalytic converter?

Yeah. Out of cars? Do they have one of those? I don't know. Was it lowered? No. It was literally the most bog-standard silver press you could ever imagine. Except it sounded like this.

It was quite... I really liked the fact that... Your Hamilton, your inner Hamilton came out, didn't it? Yeah, yeah. Well, it looked like it shouldn't sound like that. Yeah. It's like when you see someone with a Scottish accent and you're not expecting them to have a Scottish accent.

Yeah. What if electric planes are going to fly over you and you'll be like, whoa, shit. It'll be like. Sound like a mosquito. Number two on the list of the top six ways to keep the noise out at Wellington Airport. Move Wellington Airport to somewhere with an even crazier to land in a wild westerly crosswind.

Yeah. Like somewhere a bit more isolated, maybe a hilltop. Sure. Top of the Rheumatuckers. Yeah. What a crazy place to have an airport. And possibly even crazier place to land than it already is. And number one on the list of the top six ways to keep the noise out at Wellington Airport.

What about that jib board stuff that's also noise-proofing? You know, they're always like, it'll keep the noise down in your house. Sure. Which basically is like for parents renovating so that your kids don't hear you having romance. Yeah. Or when you've got teenage boys, you don't hear what they're watching on their iPads. I think that's the agreement there. It's a real embarrassment saver, the old noise-proof gym board.

That is today's top six. Play ZM's Fleshphone and Megan. This started as a simple moment between a girlfriend and her boyfriend. She was surprising. You're right. I was trying to change the height of my microphone. Maybe turn it off if you're going to fiddle with it. Yeah, but I was already holding it.

It was a two-hand job. So she was surprising her boyfriend at school. So they've been doing long distance and she walks in and he's sitting on the couch with other girls on the couch. And it's his reaction that has made this go viral. So 53 million views at last, look. Not even, by the way way not even close to being the most viewed tick tock of all time uh that's zach king's harry potter illusion 2.2 billion

oh yeah and he's got like five four or five in the top ten yeah yeah he's got so many videos you could just sit and watch even at yeah it would take you a long time to get through all his videos yeah so i remember when I first saw this TikTok, I was like, oh, his reaction was a bit, eh? And then I scrolled on. He kind of looks, people think he looks busted, right? Because his girlfriends come from out of town, doing long distance.

She walks into this party and he's like, oh. So that's the thing. Everyone was like, oh, his reaction isn't quite right. And that's when people delved into it a bit more and everyone has got a say. So basically, there's did he hand his phone over to the girl

next to him? Does she have his hand on his back? And then she takes her hand off and there's not one shuffle, but two shuffles over on the couch. So what was that girl doing right beside him with her hand on her back? And then there's the look that he... The look at the end. So he finally gets up off the couch, gives her a hug,

and then looks at his friends like, like, um, okay. God, white girls love a true crime mystery, don't they? Yeah, yeah. Especially when it involves one of their own. So everyone's going crazy and weighing in on this and whether he's been caught out doing something he shouldn't or not. Now, the girlfriend did put up a TikTok

saying, look, I know all the girls. I know that he was holding, I can see that he was holding his phone the whole time. So she's debunking everything. Right. Now, Couch Guy's weighed in himself and he has said, Couch Guy here,

you're welcome for getting you off berries and cream on TikTok. But remember, not everything is true crime. Don't be a parasocial creep. Go get some fresh air. Take care. That sounds defensive. In other words, like butt out of my life. Wow. He said, time to play. Do you know

what gaslighting means? Are you being gaslit if someone on the internet tells you to get some fresh air after you scrutinise their private life, or are you being gaslit if thousands of strangers call you delusional for claiming to know your So he is absolutely wearing it. They've been together for a year? Or been doing long distance for a year? Could you imagine if just an innocent clip where you were doing nothing wrong is uploaded and

then all of a sudden like millions of people all over the world have an opinion about it? Just ignore us. It would be horrible. We're just having a bit of fun. You were getting in on it. You, Megan, was getting in on it. I even showed my husband, I was like, what do you think of this? And he was like, oh,

don't trust that guy. I was like, right? It's the look at the end for me when he's looking at his mates like but imagining your relationship put into that much intense scrutiny yeah well I mean it's the internet we forget that they're real people don't we who put it up was she filming I think she or a friend yeah someone with who was filming so it, to get his reaction. As she's walking in the door, getting his reaction. Which wasn't what it should have been. I think we can all agree. He should have been more excited.

Yeah. Maybe he just wasn't in the mood, though, that night. To see his long-distance girlfriend. Yeah, he was out with his hot other girlfriends on the couch. Yeah, leave him alone. Oh, it's still getting in the way. ZM's Flesh Warner Megan. Play ZM.

ZM's $50,000 Secret Sound. Season 10. It is season 10 of ZM's Secret Sound. All thanks to Neon. Watch TV series and movies handpicked for Kiwis by Kiwis on Neon. This is The Secret Sound, Season 10. Is it wooden? Is it something sliding? Is it a train?

Is it a train? I don't know, man. Well. A drawer. We welcome Walter train? I don't know, man. Well. A drawer. We welcome Walter to the show. Good morning, Walter. Good morning, sir. How are you?

Good. Are you the same guy that's been texting in? Guilty, guilty, guilty as charged. So, wait. You made it. Monday morning, the first time the sound played, you messaged us saying, 100%, I know what it is. Call me back.

Call me back. Call me back. And we said, that's not how it works, Walter. Then you've got to get through. We had a caller, but you kept calling, so we talked to you, didn't we? And you said you're a million percent sure. Yes. Well, I hope you're ready for a $10,000 deposit in your bank account. I'm ready for this.

All right, Soundkeeper, Al's, are you ready for this? Oh, I've loved Walter since day one. You're an OG Walter fan. All right, well, Walter, you've got Soundkeeper Owls now. You've done the hard bit. You've managed to get through beating out all these people. What pressure? You're a million percent sure.

Walter, what sound is it? I think the secret sound is it's a tally counter. You know, when you go into the supermarket, there's a guy outside the door with the hand tally counter counting how many people are going into the store. The same when they like to count sheep. Yeah, sheep or cricket. Yes, the little clicker thing.

Yeah, little clicker thing. Okay. Hmm. Oh, the little clicker thing. Yeah, little clicker thing. Okay. Hmm. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. I don't even know why we're talking to Al. He's a million percent sure. All right, all right.

No, I just, I have a few questions. Yeah, Walter, did you, do you have your own counter? Have you tried this? Well, listen, the thing is because you say the clue is in level three. Level three made me. So when level three came around, we all had to go to the supermarket, and obviously the government had to limit the number

of people going to the supermarket. So obviously there was a guy who was counting, you know, how many people going to the supermarket. So that was my clue. Yeah. So that's right. Did you just go without food for all of level four, Walter? Yeah, yeah, exactly. I was starving, mate.

Yeah. It doesn't sound plasticky enough or metallic-y enough. In my mind, Walter. Uh-oh. Don't mess with Walter. Oh, don't you put that on me for me now. Oh, all your negativity. Yeah, come on.

Let's get behind Walter. All right, Walter. Can I give you my bank account number yeah yeah i said no no we'll put it straight on your credit card you tell me your credit card number and i'll make a little three did you want on the back yeah yeah okay walter okay time to know if you will get 10k in your account. I'm surprised. It's a good guess, honestly. And the positivity, and I've wanted energy as well. Walter, you're the ideal caller, but you haven't given me the right guess. I'm sorry.

But Walter, you were 1,000% sure. The build-up to that story is like the Prime Minister giving us the update at 1 o'clock. Walter, we've got for you. You don't go home empty-handed. Everybody that gets through this week and gets a guess wins a one-month Neon subscription. So there you go.

And speaking of the Prime Minister, you're great, Walter. We love you. ZDM, Splashborn and Megan. This story is so stupid. But at least it's not COVID. Yeah. I can promise you this is not COVID related. This is a story out of the UK.

It's a story about Peter. Peter is a 55-year- UK. It's a story about Peter. Peter is a 55-year-old father of four. Okay. He is married to 42-year-old Katie, so she's 13 years his junior. Yeah. Good work. Hot play there, Peter. Well done,

sir. She's been with him for eight years, and she said it's always just been this little quirk of his, but she shared it's always just been this little quirk of his, but she shared it online. He eats raw sausages as a snack, so he'll get like three or four raw sausages, uncooked, raw, not pre-cooked. And not like a saveloy? No, no, no, no, those are steamed.

So he's biting it and it's squidging. He bites the end off because it's inside the skin, the synthetic skin. And he slowly rolls it around his finger like you would like when you're trying to get a toothpaste tube out and squeezes all the sausage meat into his mouth. He's been doing it for more than 50 years. He started doing it when he was a kid. That is disgusting. How has he not got sick? He's never got sick. He's never got it for more than 50 years. He started doing it when he was a kid. That is disgusting. How has he not got sick?

He's never got sick. He's never got sick. Wow. He said he only eats the highest quality sausage. He knows the local butcher. Oh, yeah. And he knows that the supply chain is short. This guy does the home kill.

He does the slaughtering of the animals. He doesn't buy the meat and then repackage it. So, yeah yeah he said but since the skins went to a synthetic skin he hasn't been able to eat the skin he just used to eat it all

and even during like BBQ he says whilst BBQ for other people he'll standing at the BBQ eating a raw sausage

rather than cooking it that is disgusting I feel like my porridge is in my throat that is so yuck. He said, I know that there's a risk to eating pork. Yeah. Because that's the thing.

I assumed beef. And I know you can eat raw beef. Yeah. Or very, like, slightly cooked beef. Steak tartare. Yeah, but I didn't know. He's doing it with pork. Yeah, and pork is something you've got to cook well.

Or at least, yeah, cook it thoroughly. I know there's a risk to eating raw pork, he said. But some people smoke and drink alcohol. And they know that there's a risk to eating raw pork he said but some people smoke and drink alcohol and they know that there's a risk involved there. Does he eat raw pork?

Yeah. Wow. Yeah. He has recently caught one of his sons eating raw bacon and he's like He's like proud of you?

Look at him go. My little fella. Chip off the old block. What the hell? His wife said ironically he's a very fussy eater. Like, super just meat and three veg sort of dude. He won't eat a salad.

He'll pick the lettuce and the tomato out of a BLT. Yeah. But he'll absolutely hoon a raw sauce. That is disgusting. It just makes me feel gross. There's like various photos of him. Yeah. It's like people that do raw eggs in smoothies.

I can't deal with that. Oh, in a smoothie it's fine because it's hidden, but when you see people just gulling raw eggs, sometimes I'm like... And you've got to know the supply chain as well. Like he said, he knows the butcher that makes them But like somebody who commented on it Saying that they've seen people be very very sick

Off undercooked pork Well because they're always warning about the raw eggs Salmonella dub or whatever's in them Yeah But I'll eat raw cookie dough I wouldn't eat a whole batch but You'll have a little snack Like I'll do biscuits and then I'll be like

Okay lots for me yeah because it's nicer a little yeah that's quite cultured thank you I thought so

it's quite cultured of you yeah to try these things raw to try different food groups yeah but I was wondering on the back of eating a raw sauce is there anybody

listening who knows somebody or is that somebody that eats something raw rather than cooking it? In its more traditional cooked state. Did you ever, when you were a kid, CBF cooking the noodles? So you'd just smash up the pack and mix? No, I could never do it.

I could never do it. And, yeah, you put the sachet in and shake it about. And then you're basically just eating chips, right? You know how you get those crispy noodles on top of, like, a salad? These are just, like like the cheap version. Yeah, those are the very cheap version. Very tough on your teeth. Yeah.

Oh, you could get a rogue spike in the side of your mouth. That's what I didn't like. Or it would run up the side of your tooth and stab into your gum and it's the equivalent of getting something stuck between your fingernail and your finger. Yeah. It would really get you. Well, let's take some calls. Let's see if old Peter Peter

sausage eaters, raw sausage eaters alone, 0800 DALS at M, you can call 9696 to text in. How's this to start things off? Okay. I'm an ICU nurse. I looked after a guy

with salmonella. It was a mystery where it came from. A week into his hospital stay when he was super sick on life support, his wife said, you don't think you get it from all

the raw sausages he eats, do you? And we were like, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so this is why we don't eat raw sauce. Oh my God. Alright, well, if you like a particular food raw, something that's a bit unusual, not like carrots. Maybe just have a

spoonful of mints. You're getting the spag bol on and you're like, check that one's watching. Give us a call, 0800-DARLS-AT-M-9696. What food do you eat raw? A guy in the UK has gone viral. Yeah, his wife's outed him as a raw sausage eater and he reckons he's been...

Hey, that's not an analogy. No, it's... I caught my husband eating another man's raw sausage. I came home from work early, and he was eating Steve from Next Door Sausage. We got it. But he's goblin raw sauce. Not the skin, though.

He doesn't like the synthetic skin. It's something he's done since he was a kid. And as we just heard, someone was in the emergency, though. He doesn't like the synthetic skin. It's something he's done since he was a kid. And as we just heard, someone was in the emergency. Yeah, an ICU nurse messaged him saying a guy had salmonella. He was on life support, and it was because he ate raw sauce. So don't do that. Don't do that. Don't do that at all.

So we want to know if you are a raw food eater, maybe something a bit unusual. Steve, you are one of these people. I am. I am. So what do you eat? Raw onion. There's been a few people messaging in about raw onion. You'd eat it like an apple.

I do. You just take the outer layer off and it's quite dry and then you just bite into it. Take a bite, crunchy and you go. Do you need chewing gum or something after? No, it's actually quite crispy. Do you eat the core

as well, or do you stop? Because that's the bit that's got the real juicy bits that make you cry. Well, it doesn't really have a core. You just keep chewing through it, and then next thing you know, it's gone, so you grab another one. What about the bottom bit? What about the hard bottom to an onion?

Well, you can eat that right up until it's just a little bit that sticks out of the husk. But realistically, when you've got a whole onion, why would you eat that? So how often are you doing this? Sometimes when I go bush or go out a bit and do a bit of hunting. You don't get bitten by mosquitoes or anything like that. They tend to stay away, a bit like garlic. Really? Because you're stanky.

You smell like onions. Do you do a purple onion or just a brown? Purple's good. Yeah. Well, realistically, I like the brown ones because the purple ones seem a little bit mild compared to the brown ones. Oh, really? Okay. It doesn't have that same flavour, I suppose.

Yeah, right. Which is why I think a lot of people eat them in their salads. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, fresh in the salad, yeah. Wow, fascinating. Steve, thanks for calling. Liz, you're a rural food eater. Well, yeah, don't say it like that.

I thought that was a nice way of putting it. It makes it sound like a new fad diet. I thought I was the special one in the world, but clearly there's more like me. But yeah, I like a little bit of raw bacon. Raw? No, you can't. Isn't bacon cooked? Cured?

Yeah, cured. It's cured beforehand. That might play a part in it. I have been known to eat a little bit of sausage, Bacon cooked. Cured? Yeah, cured. Isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's cured beforehand. That might play a part in it. I have been known to eat a little bit of sausage, but I don't think I could eat a whole one, and you definitely can't eat the skin, so yeah, I'm with Peter on that. Oh, my goodness.

Because I imagine it's still, like, salty and stuff, but it's the texture for me. Like, isn't it slimy? Yeah. Well, yeah, kind of. But then I went to a fancy restaurant once by accident and I had some steak tartare and that was also by accident. And that was interesting.

And it had a raw quail egg in the middle and out of all of it, the egg was the thing that, yeah. Wow. The meat was fine. Wow. Okay, wow, Liz, thank you. Message is in.

That's Liz, the ferret, who just called in the show. I want to thank all of our muster lids for listening this morning. Amazing. Salmon. I can eat a whole fillet of raw salmon, like a grizzly bear, but I cannot eat cooked salmon. It's too rich. So what, like a sashimi?

They'll just kind of put it in slithers and dip it into soy sauce or something? No, just... It sounds like they're slapping the slab on the plate. Yeah, and... Oh, no. They'll be eating the bones too. Mind you, salmon bones, there's something... I like a bit of salmon bone.

If you get a bit of salmon bone, you can crunch them. My friend Bicky loves eating raw potatoes. I grew up on a potato farm and I've seen all the hands and machinery that those potatoes have been touched by. Oh, wait, so... She's giving them a wash. Surely Bicky's giving them a wash. You want to leave the skin on. I've seen all the hands and machinery that those potatoes have been touched by. Oh, wait. She's giving them a wash. Surely Becky's giving them a wash. You want to leave the skin on.

That's where all your nutrients are. Oh, that's not. A jacket. Would you be able to bite through that? It seems really hard. It would be a lot. Kermit would be a hard eat. Those are much harder.

Maybe you'd slice it into thin chips or something. Back in the day, my brother and I used to sit down and eat a bag of raw pasta. Mum used to get really pissed off. Like macaroni elbows. Yeah, we were eating raw pasta, which was costing her the ability to cook pasta later, but also she just did not know what it was doing to us. My old flatmate would eat raw mince. She did not like it cooked.

She'd just have her portion of the flat. They still put like, you know, tomatoes and spices and stuff in it in the spag bol? I don't think you would. I don't know. Is it just raw mince on top of spaghetti? What is wrong with people? I love to eat raw pastry. If we have some in the freezer, I'll take a sheet out to Thor just so I can eat it. I've done it for years.

I don't know what about it I like. I like eating raw pastry. Not just the sweet stuff. The flaky pastry too is pretty good. You're weird. My husband's German. He introduced me to a German dish which is raw mince on crusty bread with onions. Raw? Okay.

Schweibelt Mittwurst! We don't make it ourselves. We get our fix from the local German butcher in Tauranga. Give it a go. It's really yum. Raw mince? I'd try that.

Oh, okay. The Germans know their meat. They certainly do. Are your bookies classes raw? Why, that wasn't... They just... No, I was laughing at something else. The Germans know their meat?

Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Well, yep. My fiancé is French. I don't know if he has anything to do with that, but I blame it on that. He eats raw red meat. If I'm preparing mince or steak, he walks past and just grabs some and pops it in his mouth. Nothing better than a raw mince sandwich.

It's very common where I come from. You can ask for it at the butcher's. A raw mince sandwich. With cheese? Okay. I'd definitely add a lot of sauce. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. Ho, ho, ho.

Ooh, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Ho, ho, ho. Ooh. 79 days, 16 hours and 23 minutes away from Christmas. That's wild, right? That's not far away.

I love Christmas, but I haven't even got that spirit yet. And I usually put my Christmas tree up in three weeks. 31st of October is always my day. Yeah, right. I don't think that'll happen this year. Halloween. Yeah. What do you reckon you'll wait till after Guy Fawkes this time?

God, Halloween? I haven't even got a costume. Are we even going to do that? We're a month away from Guy Fawkes. We're a month away from community pages being flooded with, who's selling that off now? Yeah. All right.

But Christmas is what we focus on in this segment. And I can tell you, we're seeing a big bump. We're seeing a big bump. Yeah. If you see any Christmas penetration creeping in while you're out and about, screenshot it. Send it to us, FVMZM on Facebook. This was spotted online from the Kmart and Warehouse Hacks and Decor NZ Facebook page.

Danielle said, woke up at 4am and couldn't sleep so I decided to get up and wrap the first of the Christmas presents. You know me, I'm a bit of a wacky man. And she's wrapped Christmas presents. Already? She's wrapped Christmas presents. She's purchased Christmas presents. I've purchased Christmas presents.

Well, yeah, because they're saying with all the delays in shipping, I mean, we're already experiencing it now. You want to get in. You don't want to be leaving it until the last minute if you can. What was it this year? The US has paused postage to New Zealand? US Postal Service. Yeah, they're not sending here. Yeah.

Lazy. International reports. Tara said Christmas penetration in Broome. Now, this is Broome, Australia. Australia, yeah. The Three Angles store. I don't know if it was supposed to be Three Angels and there was an autocorrect there.

Time for, yeah. But yeah, they've got like a full-blown window display up. Oh, goodness. Yeah, and it says 12 weeks until Christmas on that. So that's from when she sent that in. By the way, her phone's on 83% charge, but still... Oh, no, that's your phone. Carwin screencapped that from a thing.

She's on 83% battery, but it's still yellow. Oh, she's left power saving on. Why are you leaving power saving on at 83%? What are you doing? Because I have a terrible phone. So you just live in power saving mode. Yeah, because

it decreases so quickly that I have to constantly have it charging. Yeah, I use power saving mode quite a bit. You guys in the iPhone 12s wouldn't know about that. You're right, I wouldn't know. I forget sometimes. God, I feel like Jeff Bezos.

So rich. I'm struggling to relate to people. Forgotten about having a home button. You're flying around in your dick rocket. I know, I love my big dick rocket you forget that people like Megan still have a button a home button and Cohen lives in power saving mode gosh

Tiao messaged in saying Christmas penetration and then eight exclamation marks it's a Bunnings and I can tell you nature is healing because bunnings and my attention is starting to move into christmas mode you know how they are like uh let's get rid of the worst brand of power tools uh makita are you trying some tradie banter because you know what i'm a trader i use they love it the worst allter. Yeah, that's the worst. All right.

Oh, what one am I? Milwaukee. I don't even know that one. No, you're Black and Decker. You were good in the 90s with your shit ass now. I don't want to be Black and Decker. I'm DeWalt. No, you're not DeWalt.

I'm DeWalt. But then tradies don't like DeWalt. I'm sure my dad's Makita. That's blue, right? And tradies love Makita. God, there'll be some tradies listening now thinking, no, yes, no. What happens if I had a Black & Decker, a DeWalt and a Makita?

You can't do that. Why? Pick a team. Nah, Megan's that budget brand that's orange. I'll get whatever's on sale at the time. Jobmate. Yeah, something like one of those. I've got a Jobmate trigger at home.

You're a Kmart drill. Oh, I don't get a Kmart drill. The brushes will go. I've got Jobmate stuff at home. You're a Kmart drill. Oh, I don't get a Kmart drill. The brushes will go. I've got job mate stuff at home. We've been distracted. By brand bad. But also, you've got to have the same thing

because all the batteries. Yeah. You've got to go with one brand. Megan doesn't have batteries. She has to plug in the wall. Oh, my God. And you don't even have a good multi-box.

You'll constantly be unplugging one thing to plug another one in. You're the worst tradie ever. Get another extension cord. Excuse me. It's gone from my phone to my power tools. God, plumbers. Am I right?

Not like us builders. Yeah. Not like us bloody chippies. Sorry, your wife said. Guys, I'm going to report on Christmas penetration. I know how to work your bloody wife's pipes. What did you just say? That is my wife you're speaking about.

Christmas penetration at kids' bakery in Christchurch. I don't know, but there's been a couple of reports of these. And these look absolutely... Christmas ginger nut biscuits, but they're iced with a white icing and then a decorative... I know, I know, look. Christmas ginger nut biscuits. Oh, my goodness. Send some of nut biscuit. Oh, my goodness.

Send some of those immediately. You know what? Let's breach the COVID boundaries and get to Christchurch for a ginger nut biscuit. I think it's going to be worth it. I can't see that not going down well. We're about to talk to the Prime Minister. Public pasting. The man was arrested at a bakery.

He said, I just wanted a ginger nut ice biscuit. They don't have these in Auckland because of the great ginger shortage. Yeah. The great ginger shortage. And finally today, someone wants us to know that Kmart Porirua had Christmas items on display, decorative items, your usual edible items, but they also had one of those big movable trolleys they have in Kmart with the high sides.

Oh, yeah. Full of boxes that said Christmas on them with tape around it, indicating that that would soon be unpacked. Oh, okay. So, 79 days away from Christmas, and with all that in mind... Mrs. Claus, my curtain hat, please. Christmas penetration is at... 35%.

Oh. It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. And if you see any reports of Christmas creeping in, screenshot them and send them in to us. ZDM's Fletchmore and Megan. Now the padding begins. Oh, look at that. Don't even need it.

See, we could have got away with that if you hadn't have said the padding begins. I didn't see the phone flashing. We could have done a long intro. We could have. Joined on the phone by the Prime Minister of New Zealand, Jacinda Ardern. Good morning. Good morning.

Good morning. How are you? Are you okay? Not too bad. How are you all doing? Firstly, wouldn't want your job for anything. No, no, not for a million dollars. Kind of.

Not for a million dollars. Not for like five or ten million dollars. Because you're damned if, it kind of felt like this week you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't. Yeah. Yeah. And look, that's COVID.

You know, that's the situation that's put everyone around the world in. But we have still nothing about what is happening right now changes that New Zealand's response. And the team of 5 million have done incredible work. We just need to keep going through this tough patch. Now today, Aucklanders get a chance to see friends and family in a limited way, albeit spaced outside.

Yes. The picnic, for example. Yes. A few questions about if you've got people, say, for example, you have a picnic in your backyard your friends come over, you're socially distanced you're wearing a mask, are they allowed to use the toilet inside?

The toilet keeps coming up. I'm really, I'm just a stickler here on just keeping it nice and simple. We don't want people going inside. We don't want people thinking, oh I went to the toilet so maybe I can just pop in and have a yarn to someone in the kitchen. I'll stay two metres apart from them. Social distancing, all of those rules,

actually inside, ventilation is completely different. And with Delta moving through aerosols, the outside bit is so, so key. So rather than causing any situation where people think that a little bit doesn't matter, I just keep it outside. Go to a park if you're worried about your friends fusing the alert. Reading between the lines there, it's saying,

you're saying pop a squat on the road at Endram's. No, lemon trees and tomatoes. Lemon trees, because then actually you're helping the garden as you go. What about public toilets? I can see the headline now. Prime Minister encourages people to pop squat on lemon tree Also you could pass an order to be like for the next couple of weeks you're allowed to wee outside

but just make it somewhere like So we are talking to councils about making sure that public facilities are available in spaces like parks and things But cleaned more regularly because public toilets can be pretty grim are available in spaces like parks and things. Okay. Right. But cleaned, like, more regularly? Because public toilets can be pretty grim. Yes, they can be.

So take a hand sanitiser with you just in case there's as per no soap. Are there any plans? People are asking, are there any plans for the rest of the country, like the South Island? Is there any way that they can move into Level 1 or have an easing of restrictions?

Because we see Auckland's going to be in this for a long time. Yes, on Monday, one of the things we said around the rest of the country who are in two, one of the things we said is previously for hospitality, we had a cap. Everyone's seated and they're separated, but we then had a cap on the top of that. Our view was as long as people are continuing

with the seat and separated, we can remove that cap so that we then had a cap on the top of that. Our view was as long as people are continuing with the seat and separated we can remove that cap so that will make a difference for some of those larger hospitality operators. But the reason we're still keeping restrictions, we've seen we've had positive COVID cases now in Tauranga, Palmerston North and Hamilton and so by having restrictions in place it is us a confidence, rather than if we find cases have gone through a city or another area, popping everyone back into three, it gives us a confidence that it's a bit easier to contact trace and keep people safe.

So that's why we do it. If we find a case in Christchurch of, say, someone moving freight, it means we won't necessarily have to go into level three. Could there be a 1.75? Could there be a slight easing of the twos slightly towards the ones, but still I mean, this is confusing. God. Yeah, no,

I hear you. I mean, that's what we constantly look at. Are there things we can do that keep the really important parts, that keep people safe? And that's why we lifted that cap. And I think that hopefully will make a difference for a number of operators. And that's why we lifted that cap. And I think that hopefully will make a difference for a number of operators. And that's what we've done with Auckland. You're still in three, but we thought, what is the thing that we can do safely that will help you keep going

with the restrictions that really, really matter? And so we don't want people in one another's houses, but maybe we just tell people how to see one another safely. That could make a difference. So yesterday, the vaccine certificate, the website was unveiled, and it's looking like if you want to go to a summer festival this season, it'll be no vax, no certificate, no entry. Yeah, yeah. So we've been looking at and developing vaccine certificates

for a little while. We thought we needed to give people forewarning that even though we're working through all of the places we may choose to use them, it's very clear to us that large-scale gatherings like festivals are definitely on that list. So giving people time because they want to be vaccinated for those events in summer, they need to be vaccinated now. But what are the chances of something like that even happening? I mean, we're 86 days away from New Year's. Well, we are. Look, I mean, we're at 84% of Aucklanders

who are eligible have had their first dose. So, you know, the number of people who then follow up and get their second, roughly 96% of those will then go and get their second and be fully vaccinated. If people go and get vaccinated this month, they will be vaccinated for Christmas. And so actually, and on the track that we're on at the moment, Auckland could be at 90% in a couple of weeks.

I think it's possible. So we just need to keep working on all our friends and family. So 90% is the magical number then for things like Rhythm and Vines and other big summer festivals to happen? It's a thing that puts us in the best possible position to have those events. 90 plus, yeah. So of course we need to constantly look at how it's tracking in New Zealand and how we're doing in New Zealand.

But we know from all the modelling that if you're at that point, it makes a big difference. But keep in mind, 90% of eligible New Zealanders means about 76% of our total population. We've got a lot of kids. Yeah. Speaking of which, 18th of October, kids are going to be going back to school in Auckland.

Where are we at with getting kids vaccinated? Because I've got two primary school-aged children and I'm kind of like, ugh. Yeah, so look, the public health advice and all of the changes we made on Monday were all based on recommendations from our public health advisors. They've said at the moment they believe schools will be able to open, but we haven't confirmed that yet. We want to keep looking at how we're tracking.

So we'll talk about that again next Monday. In the meantime, we're looking at the way we use vaccines, masks, and tests to create the safest environment possible. And we'll have more detail on that next week as well. Would you consider in, say, a month, we're still struggling to get vaccination numbers up because, you know, some people are still holding out. Would you consider making them stay at home and releasing the rest of us? Well, that's why we've said things like vaccine certificates help us to open up high-risk environments for vaccinated people and keep them closed for non-vaccinated people.

So we're working on a framework that will use vaccine certificates in that way. And that's something for the next couple of weeks that we'll be releasing. And so you will hear me say that here's the phases for Auckland that we're planning on using. But then once you kind of hit the end of that, then it's likely we're then going to start using vaccine certificates. Right. What was your reaction to the news that Brian Tarmachie was charged last night? Well, of course, I think what was put out was that a 63-year-old has, I believe, appeared in court.

It's not my mum. I was worried for a minute. I said, you're not a pet in court for inciting a public health order disobedience, are you? She said, no, not that I am aware of. Ultimately, we let the police make those decisions. I think if I was going around telling them who to

arrest, then that's something a bit like the Banana Republic. But I have said that I thought what happened there was illegal. And a massive slap in the face for Auckland. And if they charge him nothing else, crime against eyebrows. I know, right? And just quickly before you go, Prime Minister, it's season 10 of ZM's Secret Sound.

Do you know what this secret sound is? Imagine if she wins it though. Well she's not allowed to win it. You're not allowed to win it. It sounds like the automatic stapler on a photocopy machine that probably the speakers open in office.

Oh yes. What are they doing? ZM's Fleshborn and Megan. Play ZM. ZM's $50,000 Secret Sound Season 10. All right, Soundkeeper Owls is standing by. She's the one that knows what this sound is. This is the Secret Sound Season 10 that is going to drive us crazy for who knows how long until it's guessed. Soundkeeper Owls.

Hi. Standing by today, we welcome Vanessa. Vanessa, you've never guessed a secret sound before ever. Never. Oh, welcome. First time. First time caller, first time winner, maybe. Yeah, no pressure, no pressure.

We'll see, we'll see. All right, Vanessa, this is the secret sound. For $10,000, what do you think it is? I think it's one of those scales that you stand on, not the digital one, because Level 3 made me gain weight takeaways, you know? Oh! You mean the one with the dial, and then you stand on it,

and it hits the top. Have you been practising this? And then it goes back and forwards. Wow. That's a really good guess. That's hilarious. Oh, it is a good guess, I must say. I think a lot of us are doing that,

although we are going for our little walks. we're still eating lots of chippies. But is it the secret sound? Yes, those chippies are good. Famously quite popular chips. That's why there's a whole aisle dedicated to them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Alrighty, we'll get down to it.

I'm going gonna have to say that that 10k is not yours that is a secret sound Vanessa, we do have for you though, all this week every guest that gets on air wins a one month Neon subscription so that is all yours, well done

Thank you and secret sound season 10 it's all thanks to Neon, you can watch TV series and movies handpicked for Kiwis by Kiwis on Neon. Some amazing stuff there. I thought you were going to say handpicked for Kiwis by Kias. Just another bird getting in on the Neon watching. Yeah. All right, next on the show.

Someone has revealed her pregnancy to her partner in a very odd way. I don't even know if he was that fond of the reveal. ZDM's Fletchborn and Megan. So a woman has shared how she told her partner that she was pregnant. She put this on TikTok and they went to McDonald's. Okay. And he obviously is a big fan of just a soft serve. Not a sundae, not a McFlurry.

Just a plain soft, is there a flake in there? And a cone. No flake. And a cone, yeah. Just straight up soft serve and a cone. Okay. And she gives it to him inside of the soft serve. So she has pushed in the pregnancy test.

It is one that you... Ugh! Same one I used. It's the one you would either whittle on or dip in. Dip in your whittle. And then she's put that into the salt. The salt is ridden off.

So it does have a cap on it. But like if you... There would be residual urine. If you whittled on it, you can't really control. Well, I mean, it's a... I don't know how much. Are they still 50 cents?

I haven't brought one of those for ever. But I mean, I guess it's obviously going to be ridden off and thrown away, right? He's not eating that. Yeah. Oh, I don't know. But yeah, everyone's problem with it is, yo, that's pretty unsanitary. That's disgusting, you peed on that. Yeah, I'm assuming he's not eating the ice cream.

Yeah. Then, yeah. I mean, he was stoked, but he did take a while to figure out what the heck was going on and what it was because I imagine the window that tells you the lines too would have been covered in ice cream. You would have had to lick it off.

You know when you get ice cream on, but you're like, oh, it's just ice cream. Yeah, if it's a hot day, you've really got to time that announcement pretty quick. There's a bit of pressure though, because you're like, well, I want to tell them in a cool way. Like, you don't just want to be like. So she stuck it in like a flake.

She stuck it in like a flake, yeah, of a soft serve. And in a public place too. Like she did it at McDonald's. Such a waste of an ice cream. So he didn't know that they were expecting. No. So this is like one of the biggest surprises you'll ever get in your life, accompanying a ruined ice cream.

For some people, that could be a real double blow. It could be a double blow. Yeah. Well, yeah, I mean, she could always go get him another one. Yeah.

I didn't get the surprise pregnancy announcement either time because we were, you know, trying. So, we did the whole thing together. Oh,

you did the, I paid on the stick at the same time. We both paid on it. I don't want to be left out. Because weirdly, Fletcher's looking at me like, would that work? Imagine if you paid on it. I don't want to be left out. Because weirdly. Fletcher's looking at me like, would that work? Imagine if you peed on it and it's like, yes, pregnant. You're like, uh-oh.

Uh-oh, spaghetti-o. We were trying as well. But Andrew, I remember him saying early on, he watched someone do that reveal together where they waited together and he was like, I don't want to do it like that. I was surprised. Is this when you're going to tell us the cul-de-sac story? No.

That was nine months earlier. Fletch. And that was... Fletch. That was told to in the sanctity. That's not even appropriate for the radio. Oh, I think it is. Even if I wanted to.

No. So yeah, I did a little reveal with it in a box. But when I revealed to friends and family, it was on my birthday. So Andrew, after I'd opened all my presents, gave me, he's like, oh, here's one more present. And I opened up like this tiny little onesie in front of all the friends and family. Weird. I don't remember being at that birthday party. No, neither.

With these friends and family. And there was no COVID restrictions. No, there was certainly no invite. It wasn't like the case of being invited and not being able to attend. No, you got a special reveal. Remember, we were like, let's start for the radio. And then you got like a special. Still, that was a party with food.

I feel like I could have, yeah. I could have really thrived in the environment. Wow. I mean, we wouldn't have gone. You know me and a social setting. I know. I'd thrive. As if you would come.

Interesting though. I mean, people find really cute ways to do it. Some people stick the Whittle stick in an ice cream. Sure. I would love to take your calls this morning on 0800 dials at Emmy. Text as well, 9696. How did you surprise people with your pregnancy news? So we want to know how you revealed your pregnancy news to other people.

Someone put a pregnancy stick in an ice cream and gave it to their partner. Which is manky because you've ruined the ice cream because that's unhygienic. Yeah. I hope you didn't need it. Tori, how did you reveal the big pregnancy news? Well, at the time

I was a manager in retail and I thought, oh, what better way to test the team and we'll see if they read the daily planner. So did my normal, you know, goals for the day, little inspirational quote, lunch breaks, and then right at the bottom put, P.S. I'm pregnant. And no one could read it. Nobody saw it, yeah.

Nobody's reading your daily planner, Tori. It was so rude. So, yeah, after lunchtime I was like, all right, time to hit these guys up. Did you stop doing the daily planner after that? No, but I made a point of going, right, well, come on, you've studied a chef, let's go through that together. So, yeah.

I love that. That's amazing. I love when you never read a daily planner or an email or whatever that goes out, and then the one time you do read it, there's some test about if people are reading it in there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I never read this, but I sort of skirted the rules. I'm always a bit sus about our CEO, Bogsy, sends out his weekly report at the end of the week,

and to read it, you've got to click the link to go to the report to read it. And I'm like, he knows how many people are clicking. So I always click it and then I shut the window. So it looks like I've read it, Tori. I click it and scroll. You obviously haven't because it's always a video. Oh, no. I've seen he's done videos, but I just, I read.

I don't watch the video. Do you reckon he gets the view count? I watch it thrice. I watch it thrice to make sure I've not missed anything This is why you're a model I'm a company man Yeah Yeah

Shut up you dude You just know he's probably listening I watch it Thrice Bogsy I watch your video Three And then I send him an email I send him an email

Of bullet points That I think of Great points that he's covered For the week And where I think We as a company Could be heading next week Vaughn's got his number

He texts him He kisses his ass weekly. On where the company needs to head. Yeah. He's like, Christ, another text from Vaughan. I tell,

I say, Bob's here, get the bloody editor of the Herald on the phone and tell them to pull their bloody heads in. That's what I say. I say,

you're losing subscriptions. Now this is where I'd, this is what I'd do. And I tell you what, they love it. They love it. They do love it. Everyone upstairs

loves hearing from me. They do, yeah. Jumped up, pricked downstairs is what they call me. I think that's a compliment. I think it is, yeah. Some more messages in. Are the ways that you've revealed the pregnancy news? Someone said they saw it online and it's worse than the stick and got in the ice cream like a flake.

They used the pregnancy stick as a popsicle stick and made him an ice block. And he literally ate the ice block and then saw it at the end. Oh, please tell me they used it. There was no cap. Oh! They said they had washed it, but that's not. It's manky. No.

We were trying for a baby, but it was a surprise. I had no idea how to tell them. So a few weeks ago, we were watching Give Us a Clue, and I said we should play a game of charades. And that was how I told him. Oh, that's pretty cute. A game of charades. Did they go first with the pregnancy,

or did they lull them into a false sense of charades by doing Lion King? And then your turn, and then third one is I'm pregnant. Yeah. I'm pregnant. We played a game with the entire family at Christmas of Pass the Parcel. And the present in the middle was the announcement we were having about, I'd be so jip. I'd be so bloody angry.

Yeah, you would. If that happened to me. And jealous of the attention. Yeah, because you're not getting anything. But this isn't for me. This is for you. What about me? What about me?

What about me? What about everybody else got a lollipop on the layers that they got? And that's how I brought Christmas for everybody. Oh, somebody said, I'm listening. As my partner and I are pregnant, we haven't told anybody yet. Oh, these are great ideas for you. These are great ideas. We had some on the old Instagram response too.

I always tell my mum that she could clean my oven when I finally got pregnant. Great ideas. We had some on the old Instagram response too. I always tell my mum that she could clean my oven when I finally got pregnant. Is that a use of miscreant? Mum's just like gagging to clean that oven. She's like, let me in there. Let me in there. Let me around, Tracy. I've got the Mr. Oven. I've got my gloves.

Mr. Muscle Oven. Mr. Muscle, yeah. Whatever it's called. And then they put a bun in there or something. No, they just said, but I was living in the UK when we found out, so I said to her, you can clean my oven. It needs cleaning. Oh, that'd be a good idea, putting a big bun in there.

People do that too. But then people would be like, why have you put a loaf in the oven? They'll be like, no, it's a bun. No, it's not. It's a loaf. And then if you go too small, they're like, there's a slider in the oven. Or there's a roll. Yeah, or a brioche.

You're like, okay, back up the specificity of what it is. You put a hamburger in a bun in the oven. A hamburger's a roll. Yeah, or a brioche. You're like, okay, back up the specificity of what it is. You put a hamburger in a bun in the oven. A hamburger what? Also known as? Yeah. Brioche? No.

No, no, no, no, no. Keep going. Whip? Sourdough? No. It's less the type of bread and more of the form of bread. This is your fault

for trying to be clever. Yeah. My husband asked me what I was thinking. I love asking everyone in my family this. Sometimes the kids will be sitting there quietly and be like, what are you thinking about? They're like, I don't know. I'm like, you've got to be thinking about thinking. I love asking everyone in my family this. Sometimes the kids will be sitting there quietly,

they'll be like, what are you thinking about? They're like, I don't know. I'm like, you've got to be thinking about something. I said to my, my husband said to me, what are you thinking about? And I said, well, I'm just really rattling my brain on how I'm going to tell you that I'm pregnant. Ideal.

What a cool way of doing it. Wow, yeah. I threw a pregnancy test at my partner while he was hungover in bed. Ha, cute. Yeah, just the cute little things. Okay. I had a bread bun in the oven, told the in-laws

to search for their present in the kitchen. Oh, yeah. Did they get it or did they just think stink present? Yeah. Oh, yeah, having an open home, are you? Yeah. Took a bit of bread in the oven and turned it on. My sister told... Oh, my God. No, this is terrible. This is a terrible... Don't do this one. My sister told me that god No this is terrible This is a terrible

Don't do this one My sister told me That the doc had found An abscess in her uterus And then there was A long pause And he said But it'll be growing

And gone in nine months What are you doing? Oh my god Why are you saying Things like that? Yeah That's a dark Family sense of humour

Good way to Know that they're Going to be happy about it It's not an abscess It's a baby And then the baby's Called Abby And they're That's a dark way to know that they're going to be happy about it. It's not an abscess, it's a baby. And then the baby's called Abby. They're like, why am I called Abby? And they're like, you want the truth or should I make something up? Right, yes, there's multiple ways.

CDM's Fletchmore and Megan. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Tay, tay, tay, tay, tay. Today's fact of the day is two of the least profitable movies, and by saying least profitable, I mean actually cost the studio that made them a ton of money. Two of the least profitable films both take place on Mars. Really? 2012 there was that sci-fi movie

called John Carter. Oh yeah. And it lost $127 million. That's how much it did not make back. Who was the guy that was in it? I also feel like he was like a heartthrob

up and comer and then this this costume Taylor Kitsch. Yeah. Remember he was going to be like the next big thing? He was like a real horn, wasn't he? He was a real horn. He's been in some stuff lately but he certainly isn't the horn we're all expecting him to be. And the other one

is Mars Needs Moms which was a movie about Mars needing moms. It was all in the title, Everything You Need to Deduct. And it lost $143 million. But you could say from this that Mars is cursed, but then that Mars, the Martian. The Martian.

So then I was like, how many movies have been set on Mars and when did this whole fiasco start? The first movie ever set on Mars was filmed in 1910. It was four minutes long. A professor used an anti-gravity powder to float to Mars where he encountered aggressive trees and a giant creature. The creature hits him back to Earth,

but the powder spills and the whole laboratory flies into the sky. All in four minutes. All in four minutes. That's a lot happening in four minutes. I mean, I feel like, you know, HBO could probably make that ten hour long episodes now. A whole lot of story about like, where did the powder come

from? Is the powder ethically sourced? Yeah. Who is this professor? What's his background? Has he ever killed anybody? But it's throughout time. In 1913, a Martian travelled to Earth to help a man change his ways in A Message to Mars in 1913.

There's just been a ton of movies set on Mars. But yeah, probably the most well-known one would be Matt Damon's The Martian, 2015, where he lived on potatoes grown in other people's poo. Yeah. Which is one of the small parts,

but also probably the biggest takeaway from that movie that everybody remembers. Yeah. So today's fact of the day is you're really rolling the dice if you do a movie set on Mars, because two of the biggest money losers of all time took place on Mars. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Apparently 39% of Kiwis are looking to change their job. 39%?

Okay. Yeah, that's, well, just shy of half, really, isn't it? This was, what? I was going to say, that's good. If they're not enjoying it, then you should always do something else, right? Yeah. 33% of people said they had their itchy feet due to lack of career opportunities, but that could be athletes athletes fault because we're coming

to the end of winter and it's starting to get warmer again you might have picked up a bit of fungus you may not have been wearing your jandals in the gym shower

yeah as well yeah and it could have been a slow grower 30% said the lack of appreciation or recognition

is their major motivation aww yeah women were 21% more likely to select no pay rise as a reason for wanting to change their jobs. When asked what initiative, oh, this classic question when you work for a company,

ask what initiatives would encourage them to stay in their role and you always address it like, right, like more money. And then the next time they ask, they're like, outside of financial remuneration. So meaning, you poo out a lot for a pay rise. Yeah. What else? 27% said the introduction of more rewards and recognition.

And 23% chose a promotion. A promotion without the associated pay rise? But that doesn't make, you'd want a pay, I'd rather have a pay rise. You could call me whatever you want if you gave me a pay rise. I would like to see. You could call me the intern, I wouldn't care. Diddlehead. Diddlehead bum bum. Hey, alright, we're going to give you

a five grand pay rise, but when you log onto Zoom you have to say, hi everybody it's Sweet Chat from the diddle diddle bum bum department, I'm ready for the Zoom. Prison unaccounted for. I'd be all for it, I'm getting a pay rise. I'd actually do it for nothing if I got to be the head of the department. It's a thriving

department. It's got a huge potential for financial growth and I feel like with the KPIs, I can really have a good ROI. I'm similar hanging fruit with a lot of blue sky thinking. This is why you're great. Play ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. We are loving Squid Game on Netflix. No spoilers here. This is to you're great. I'm in management now. You are. Play ZM's Flesh, Fawn and Megan. We are loving Squid Game on Netflix.

No spoilers here. This is to talk about the success of Squid Game because- So on track to be one of the biggest shows ever, isn't it? Yeah. I saw Tucker Waititi yesterday weighing into the watch it with subtitles or dubbing debate. He's team subtitles. What about people that are saying Korean people are saying we're missing, even with the subtitles, we're missing

a whole lot. The subtitles was rushed. Was rushed, were rushed. I wish I could go back and watch it with subtitles. Did you watch dubbing? Yeah. Of course you did. No, I knew that it wasn't doing the characters justice. I knew it. I don't like, they always

use mismatched voices. I know. No, I don't like the, they always use mismatched voices. I know. And they, it's, no, I can't do it. Yeah. So it is easily the most successful Korean program on Netflix,

but it took a long time to get to us. So Wong Dong Hyuk is the show creator and was rejected by studios for 10 years with Squid Game. It wasn't called Squid Game. It was called Round 6. Yeah, Round 6. Right. Obviously six rounds. But then, yeah, they changed it to Squid Game.

He said after about 12 years, the world has changed into a place where such peculiar violent survival stories are actually welcomed. But at the time, everyone was like, ah, no, this is really violent. Yeah. In South Korea, that kind of TV show wasn't welcomed at all. Just imagine if you were one of those TV executives that turned that down.

Like, back, I love stories like this. People that, like, struggle for years to get their ideas off the ground and they persist. Ten years. And they make it. What we've learnt, man, is that if it's your dream, man, never give up on it. Yeah, unless your dream's

real shit. Yeah. Don't bother. But apparently he was struggling for money and sitting in a cafe and was like dreaming up how to play games to win money. Originally, the games were really complicated and he was like, what if you did it with like kids games? And so that's how it came to be.

Right. But what? Wow. So I'm in my soaps company. You're doing a soaps company. I didn't know about this. Are you? Yeah.

What kind of soaps? But I'm making the soaps in like ice molds. Right. Are you just melting down all the half used soaps from the ridges and then putting them into new soaps? Uh-huh. Okay. That's a good idea.

Yeah. And I make it in my bath. Okay. Right. Okay. Cool. Do you have to get all the pubes out from the hotel guests? Works as exfoliant.

That's part of it. It's Vaughan Smith's skull-shaped ball hair soaps. Okay, well you don't need any one. Pubes always. You don't give up on that, I won't, man. This is what I need to hear. Thank you, Megan. I'm going to give you a special mention on the

soap packaging. I thought you were going to give me a special soap. I was like, I don't want it. I'll give you a soap too. Nah, it's okay. Give me a soap. These soaps made possible by Megan Pappas. That's what I'll say. She encouraged the dream.

Yeah. That's wonderful. Of Vaughan Smith's recycled pube soap. I don't need one though, thanks. Sure? Yeah. Cool. Just know that your inspo was enough.

Yeah. ZM's Flesh Warner Megan.