ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 9th April 2021

Episode Date: April 8, 2021

Top 6: Covid App  Bakery of the Day!  The Cube Rule!  Bet I Can Guess Your Mums Name!  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul podcast, thanks to McCafe, by 5 McCafe coffees, get one free on the Maccas app. And it's... Ah, yes. Vaughan's leaving. Vaughan is gone. Now just, is that an Andrea... Borchelli. Andrea, Andrea...

Borchelli. Andrea. Andrea. Borchelli. God, any excuse to bloody crowbar that performing arts degree in, eh? Absolutely. $38,000. Hit me. Got to get your money's worth. You didn't hit me at the right time. Hit me.

I can't listen to this without thinking of stepbrothers now yeah feral john c reilly yeah yeah yeah yeah remember at the worldwide prestige whatever it is the catalina fucking wine mixer yeah yeah the catalina remember and they and they the whole thing's falling apart and then they start singing this that's right and it calms the whole crowd oh this is this is the Celine version. This is the Celine version. Oh, beautiful. Is there any other version?

We will get down to why we're singing this soon. We should play songs like this more often on ZM. I think so. This could be a great Friday Flash thing. I know you're new to commercial radio, Hayley, but that's not... I've got a good understanding of it now. Right, okay.

Is that the air conditioning guy? I haven't seen him for ages. Well, maybe. I'd love to chat about traffic. There he is. It is him. It is him. Yeah.

It's perfect. Great temperature. Yeah, you got it, buddy. It is him. I knew it. You never forget a face, do you? All the time. But not when it's important people

Like the guy that keeps the air con at the right temperature Time to say goodbye I never forget the name of a man who keeps your nipstiff No, neither I don't often meet them But when I do, burned into my retina Now why are we singing goodbye? But it is time to say goodbye

Mountie, who's been on the social media desk How long have you been on the social media desk. How long have you been on the social media desk for? Probably like a year and four months. I held up two fingers for two months. As a two-year guest. Right. Okay, very close. And you are not leaving ZMU, retreating to the office.

I am. To normal hours. Oh, baby. Disgusting. Good riddance. Babies. Good riddance to those early morning alarms. And you guys.

Good riddance to us also. Yeah. You'll miss Vaughn's yelling. Oh. Everybody misses mine. I can come into the office and yell. Your ears won't start burning. She can still wake up early enough to listen to it.

I can probably still hear it out in the office. Yes, that's what I aim for. I want everyone to know I'm here when I'm here. You'll know when we're getting excited about things like schnitzel. Yeah. Oh, the schnitzel excitement was my absolute height of excitement this week. Apart from when I followed a guy messaging him with his mum's recipe. His mum's a b****.

Because her recipe sucks. I mean, boy, that's hard. That's hard hard That's hard I was so dark When I followed his recipe I followed his technique to a T It was a subpar schnitzel Subpar schnitzel

I will request I will request that producer Jared Absolutely remove what you said about his mother Because I don't believe that. It could be anybody's mother. I don't believe that's fair. He was a live radio listener. I don't believe that he...

Yeah, I'll be censoring that. Okay, fantastic. Please apologise now. We'll never know what I said to his mother, so no apology necessary. I think you're getting riled up, and I think we need to listen to Andrea to calm us down.

Well, so just because somebody else has a nice snitch recipe doesn't mean you're going to like it. Don't start a... Thank you. Well, anyway, back to Mountie. Thank you so much for all of your amazing work. Your service is rendered. Thank you.

During your time here. Good luck with your new ventures and your new hours. Thank you. Thank you so much and thank you for that very derailed goodbye. I don't want to cry, so that's why I always very derailed goodbye. Yes. I don't want to cry. You're most welcome. So that's why I always derail a goodbye. I noticed I haven't received a goodbye gift. Yeah, so this was a, well, a topic of discussion.

But because you're not leaving. It's a reassignment. It's been awkward. It's a reassignment that you don't get a giant card or leaving gift. Because you're still in the office. Here's the problem. Yeah. We've got all these, like, other nice guy shows

that keep buying their behind-the-scenes people stuff and it's not teaching anybody to stand on their own two feet. Hit it, Andrea. You only say that because our producers are pissed off because Jono and Ben buy their producers coffee all the time. And I'm saying they're raising a wicked producer. This intro is literally the length of that song. And I'm saying, they're raising a wicked producer. This intro is literally the length of that song.

And some. Yeah. That was... What's this? Another Celine train. Is this what just comes afterwards automatically? This is the next.

This is some more Andrea Bocelli. Quanto me in the moro. Oh, this is nice. A more. A more. It's turned into

a sexy farewell. Yeah. So, to answer your question Mountie no you don't get a gift because you're in the office

but when you do get a leaving gift if you ever choose to leave it will encompass the multiple jobs yeah one like large

yeah well if they do decide to get back into producing I think John and Ben are my guys they're lovely guys

they're nice guys the nicest guys in the industry. So lovely. They never call me a dum-dum. You've worked with both now. You've worked on their TV show with John and Ben and with us. Who are the nicer guys? Oh my god. But I want to know

who pushed you harder? Who expected more, demanded, and who you'll leave as a better broadcaster? John and Ben. No, that's not a better broadcaster? Jono and Ben. No, that's not the right answer. No, Jono and Ben are the nicer of the two. Fuck you then. But Fletch and Vaughn are the most inspirational.

That's what I'm saying. Push me to my absolute best. We're raising wolves. We're not shepherding sheep. We're raising wolves. We're not shepherding sheep. Yeah. We're raising wolves. You're not here for a free ride, Sproul. Absolutely not.

And I realised that from day one. Yeah. Yeah. And I feel like I've stepped up. You're a fucking wolf. All right. Group howl. Ready?

Three, two, one. Oh! Oh! Yeah, good. We're raising wolves. All right. Now back to Mountie. Thank you for your time

Come on Hal Raising fucking wolves Hello good morning welcome to the show Fleach, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul Thank you, Rachel. Thank you so much, Rachel. Friday morning. Friday, Friday, getting down on Friday.

Poor girl. As Svorn plugs his headphones in. You know whose fault this is? Whose? Megan's. Because one day, all of a sudden I said, what happened to my headphone bag? And she said, oh nothing, that's my headphone bag. She took my good headphone I said, what happened to my headphone bag? And she said, oh, nothing.

That's my headphone bag. She took my good headphone bag and left me with this dud headphone bag with all the stitching coming undone. Yeah. I need a sewing machine to redo the... I've got a sewing machine. Do you? Fix this, please. Toss it at me.

Do you use your sewing machine? It's just the stitching's come undone. Yeah. The strings, the drawstrings are always flapping around willy-nilly. Is this a pleather? It is a pleather. I believe it is a pleather.

It's a high-quality pleather. I'm not confident enough to sew on a piece of plastic. I'm not pleather-shamed. What do you mean? Well, you can make me a brand-new one from actual leather if that's your preferred solution to this issue. Yeah, or an old pair of jeans. Yeah. That'd be nice. old pair of jeans. Yeah.

That'd be nice. A denim headphone case. Yeah. Use the pockets. Do you use your sewing machine much? My sewing machine is actually being occupied down in the Wairarapa. Oh, right. So I can't help you.

My mum's borrowing it. Yeah. She is... What's Patsy whipping up? Probably some curtains. Oh, okay. She's pretty good, mate. Why would you make your own curtains nowadays?

Why wouldn't you? With how cheap they are. But like, it's literally a slab of fabric with a hem. Yeah. But then you've got to put the little strings that you pull. Yeah, but they come as like a kit. You just sew that on. And you just sew them on.

I didn't know that. But then how much does the kit cost? This is all starting to add up. This is all starting to add up. Yeah, especially when you go to the warehouse and get pre-made curtains for next to nothing. Yeah, but you can still smell. But what?

But a bit. You can still smell the Chinese factory. You open them up, you're like, you haven't breathed since you left Shanghai. You don't want them to blow onto an open flame, that's for sure. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Certainly not. Coming up on the show,

your chance to win free fuel this morning at 7 and 8, Z Empty Tank, the activator coming up just before the news at 7. Your next shot to win. You need it. You need it. It's fun.

The top six is coming up. I can't remember. Oh, my God. I don't think it was even decided upon, was it? It was the gaming achievements on the app. Hey guy, what app? On the COVID app. Why were we doing that? Oh my god, you were literally in the pre-show meeting.

Ha ha ha! You've got a real attitude because you sat in the nook. I sat in the nook because there wasn't a spare chair. I haven't been at a desk. This is my first minute at a desk this morning. It's absolutely changed your whole thing. It's the top six other sorts of gaming achievements

that can be within the COVID app because now you can get a streak. Oh, yeah. You can get a 14-day badge. You get a sweet little badge. You better be able to display it on your damn social media. And we should be using that today because yesterday there was a worker.

It's back, baby. Yeah, but hopefully this, baby. Yeah. But hopefully this is contained. Yeah. I don't even think there's been any lists of places visited. Places of interest, no. Apparently they lived alone as well.

Made me a little bit sad. No, I'd love to live alone. No, but then they were... Where would your fiance go? In his own house. Come to some sort of agreement. Next on the show, speaking of COVID, managed isolation. Somebody is on hunger strike.

Yeah, but she's cheating. She's cheating her hunger strike. Yeah. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. I remember a couple of days ago, Fletch said to me, is a woman doing a hunger strike? Yeah, I did.

Because she was refusing her final COVID check. So I have a bad habit, and this can be at times morbid as well, because it can be when people are in the news and they've died. But I know I'm not the only one that does this. I will Instagram and Facebook stalk people in the news. 100%. Is that bad? And you know what?

I'm not the only one because you only have to type in the first few letters or their first name and it auto-completes the full name. Right. Because people also do this. I don't do it, but I will now that you've mentioned it. But I especially do it for people like this, like the hunger striker, because I'm like, where are they coming from? Are they a crazy, like, conspiracy theorist?

And in this case, I showed you her Facebook page. She has posts like, don't get the vax. Don't let your whanau get the vax. I'm like, okay. No, encourage your whanau to get vaccinated is what we should all be doing. Exactly, yeah. So she's on a hunger strike because she has to stay longer and she's refusing her final test.

Yeah. And if you refuse, they keep you in longer. Yeah. Which is fair enough. Does she know that the test doesn't vaccinate you? You know, like... I think she's like most anti... I mean, I don't know.

She hasn't... I can't speak for her, but I'm assuming that she thinks it's all a big fake lie and she doesn't want to be involved in any of it. Just get the swab up the nosy and go. Yeah. Well, she's in a fast against medical tyranny. But she's drinking smoothies. Now that's not a hunger strike.

No, that's a diet. That's a diet. That's a crash diet. That's a crash diet ahead of an event. Yeah. Yeah. Also, if you load up a smoothie, you could probably have close to half or if not all your daily intake.

Oh my gosh. My smoothie this morning was packed with calories. There's no reason you couldn't smoothie a whole roast meal. Absolutely. I could, yeah. The kumara would whole roast meal. Absolutely. I could, yeah. The kumara would add quite a nice texture. Creaminess, yeah. A creaminess.

You've got your broccoli for your greens. You've got to hide a bit of greens in your smoothie, don't you? And then the lamb. So you could smoothie it all. Very well known for its smoothies. You'd smoothie it all into a gravy, wouldn't you? It would become a gravy. Yeah, like a Maggie gravy.

A thick Maggie. Like a Maggie gravy. A thick Maggie. Like a Maggie gravy. A thick Maggie packet gravy. As the South Africans call it, yeah. So I didn't, because she's in isolation, like managed isolation. How is she getting the smoothies? Because famous, you can't, it's not made to order. I wonder if she's literally getting her bag of food

and she's got a magic bullet in the room. I'm on a hunger strike. I can't eat that. Or maybe they're giving you a smoothie. They're like, well, you're not eating this food. Here's a smoothie.

You're more on a chewing strike at that stage. Yeah. You're lashing out against the medical tyranny in the form of refusing to chew. Or is she ordering in some tank? You know?

How loaded is she? You just can't be having a tank for every meal. You'd be broke. Well, especially if you've got to stay in longer than 14 days. Yeah. Also, like,

she knew she was coming back into the country. This is what pisses me off wildly. Like, you know, if you don't want to be in quarantine, wait until... Don't come home. Yeah, wait.

Yeah. Totally agree. If you don't want to stick to the rules that have kept us fairly untouched by it, don't come home. Yeah. Totally agree. If you don't want to stick to the rules that have kept us fairly untouched by it, don't come home. Yeah, and if you're going to do a hunger strike, don't have a smoothie. You're on a chewing strike now. Yeah, you're on a diet.

Yeah. A dumb diet that never works, by the way. Those people that do these smoothie, liquidy, detox diets, the minute that's over and they smash three blocks of Whittaker's and literally a family-sized pack of those crusty buns, those dinner rolls you get from the... Yes, the Christmas dinner rolls. Yeah, you're just like...

Swallowing them whole because you forgot how to chew. You're straight back to where you started. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Chris Lilley has a new project after a couple of years of controversy now. And I can't actually believe it took so long for controversy to find her. Obviously, he has played many, many characters, some excellent character work, some very questionable. We were talking about this yesterday, Pat rolling to Uluru and We Can Be Heroes.

One of the best. I do have to admit that I loved We Can Be Heroes and I did love Angry Boys at a time where I was less informed about what was appropriate. Let's not forget that he did do blackface in that show. Yes, a lot. He also played a Chinese mother. That's right. Yeah, he did do blackface in that show. Yes, a lot, yeah. He also played a Chinese mother. That's right, yeah, he did.

With a very stereotypical racist accent to boot. But Summer Heights High, again, that had some... Jonah. That had Jonah in it, and that was problematic as well. Yeah, it's really successful shows, and then I think it's just people were like, you know what, we're going to call time on that. Well, same with Little Britain. Same kind of time, wasn't it? Yes, exactly.

And then he had that show, Lunatics, that was very poorly received. Do you remember that? That was just on Netflix? Yeah, I didn't rate it very much. He did have a blackface character on that as well, an African character.

And very recently too. Very recently. But, of course, one of his most famous characters, Jemay, who was a high school student. Jemay was more like kind of. Yeah. Did you relate being a private school girl at all to Jemay? I don't know if Jemay and I really connected.

No. She was the opposite of who I was at high school. But anyway, Jemay, his character, now has a podcast called Jemazing. I'm so over the world right now. It's like I'm in like the hottest phase of my life and the world's literally like falling apart. It's like climate change, COVID. It's like so fucking annoying.

Yeah, we were just playing that straight off the podcast. I knew it. I knew what that was. We listened to the first 15 seconds and that was literally in the 16th second. It's been nice working with you, Hayley. It's been so, that was not on me. It would make sense to make you the scapegoat.

You are filling in. And I have had a couple of complaints in my short time here. Yeah, it would make sense for you to take the fall for this. For your blackface escapades. Yeah, honestly. Which day? Which day are we talking about? Anyway, so it's a weekly 15-minute podcast, Jemazing.

Okay. And it's now Jemay is 20 years old. She's a uniing. Okay. And it's now Jemai is 20 years old. She's a uni student. Okay. And she is doing it as an assignment for uni. So, yeah, that's her being like, listen every week so I can pass my. Is she studying comms? She 100% is studying comms, right?

Well, she said that it's for her social media subject. Her social media subject. Her social media subject? So maybe she is, yeah, she must be, oh no, it's her final year in a PR degree. So calm. Yeah, there you go, calm. PR and calm. And that she's moved into an influencer space these days.

Yep. So there you go. Every week, a 15 minute little bit of time with Jermaine. Hopefully he doesn't have any podcasts with some of his other characters. Give that a listen. I've seen a few people sharing it so I'm assuming it's pretty good. Probably one of his stronger characters.

It's 15 minutes long. Maybe one of his least offensive. More acceptable characters. From the smoggy ZM think tank, this is the top six. Hello there. Now

within the COVID-19 tracer app on your phone, this is where you use to scan the QR codes to check in. Let me see if mine's updated because apparently now it gives you some sweet stats. Yeah, mine hasn't. Do you have to update it? I think mine's updated because apparently now it gives you some sweet stats. Yeah, mine hasn't. Do you have to update it?

I think mine's just on auto-update. Yeah, mine is on auto-update as well. Okay. But apparently there's going to be stats that show you how many people used the app the day before. Okay. And how many places have been checked into the day before. It's going to start giving us some sweet stats. Okay, because we did

have a community case yesterday, so we need to get back onto using this properly. Yeah, but that was something that worked. And as in managed isolation facilities, a board of work,

a frontline staff, and as yet, no places of interest to report. No. And you think that the frontline staff would definitely be using

the app. Seriously. Yeah. Also, like, he missed two appointments to get a vaccine, the security guard. What do you think? Because of personal reasons.

For personal reasons. God, I'd just be in there straight away if I worked in an IQ facility. Get in there. Give me a vaccine in the arm, then give me another in two weeks time. I was going to say a biscuit, you know, but that's blood donations, isn't it? But they should do biscuits after the COVID vaccine. Why? You're getting vaccinated against a possibly deadly disease.

You don't need a biscuit. I like biscuits. They should give us like a Jaffa Finn, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, or a wafer, yeah. Just something light. A biscuit for on the go, you know? Just something light. We're not talking Tim Tam.

We're not talking Toffee Pops. We're talking... and then when they get behind the vaccine schedule they're like sorry it's just the biscuits we've been waiting on the biscuits yeah we just can't

they were coming on that boat through the Suez Canal why do we open these because now I'm just scanning through everywhere I've been over the last month

where have you been literally all up and down the country oh yeah you've been around Napier Wellington I sign in here every day what do you do Karen Walker Ponsonby store shout out All up and down the country. Oh, yeah, you've been around. Napier, Wellington. I sign in here every day.

Do you? Karen Walker, Ponsonby Store, shout out. But you do, when you scan in with your card, that goes into a computer so that they'll be able to tell. God, if this goes on... I'm not saying don't scan in. Yeah, if my diary goes on the TV, people are going to be like, hey, he just eats a lot. Yeah, look at that.

Rude Boy, this was all on one day. Rude Boy, Brown Street, which is a bar. Daily Bread, which is a bakery. Catro, which is another bakery. Scratch Bake is the next day, which that would have been a free off. There should just be a pie graph and it's like carbs, supermarket. Oh, no. Ouch.

Ouch. That was an interesting day. Got a mole map. Anyway, the top six deals with this streak function of the new COVID Tracer update. If you use it, you can get a 14-day streak if you use the app every day to check in

when you're going around the place. So I've got the top six other gaming type achievements for the COVID app in the next round of updates. Number six, a kill streak. This is in video games where you kill someone and then there's a small amount of time and then you kill another person

and that's a double and then it could be a triple. That would kind of be defeating the purpose of... Oh, no, to stop killing people. It's killing possibilities to spread the virus. Ah, right. So you do the check-in and you sanitise your hands. Right. It's a kill streak.

Yeah, good. It's a kill streak. How do you good. It's a killstreak. How do you log your sanitised hands? There's a little button. You could lie, but... But you've just touched the app before you sanitised, so now you've re... Infected.

Touched your hands after you've sanitised, so... We can work on that. Number five on the list of the top six gaming-type achievements in the COVID app. You find the hidden QR codes within the store. You don't scan at the door. You try to find like a cool hidden one throughout the store. And then it says, for example, yesterday I went to Mitre 10.

So I could have scanned at the door. But then I find the hidden one. It's like you went to Mitre 10 but you earned two points because you found the hidden QR code it was behind the hammers it's kind of like

Pokemon Go isn't it yeah you gotta find the QR codes you gotta walk around yeah they should have

I don't want to ruin your list but imagine if there was a okay no you can save it to the end it could be a bonus

one but otherwise sometimes if I say something I'll say shut your mouth. That's in my list. Way to go dickhead.

Improvise one. Number four on the list of the top six gaming type achievements for the COVID app. You can unlock a new costume for your character if you check in a whole lot of places. They're monitoring it right and you do 10 you check in a whole lot of places. Yes. Oh, yeah, I like that. So I guess they're monitoring it right, and you do 10 check-ins at a variety of places.

And so they send you a cool T-shirt in the mail. Hey, I check in, man. I'm cool. I checked in, and all I got was this lousy T-shirt. Or like you, that bakery, the day that you checked into five different carbohydrate outlets, they could send you the carbohydrate t-shirt which is an XXL black

t-shirt. It's a black t-shirt. They know where you're heading. They're helping you out. Number three on the list of the top six other gaming type achievements for the COVID app to have scan somebody else's scan in.

So when you're scanning in, I scan in. I get the QR code of your screen. Okay. And then it knows. Yeah, good. And that's a double down, triple points scanning in of a scanning in. Yeah, okay. Number two on the list of the top six gaming type achievements for the COVID tracer app

are combo chicken achievements. Okay. Like we were just talking about the bakery. The day's combo might be haircut, bakery, booze. Yep. And so if you just magically happen across a combo of those three within the day, you get that day's hidden combo check-in achievement. I was just going to say,

you've described a middle-aged woman, but also that could be a good one for you. Also Hayley. Booze, bakery, and haircuts. Yeah. Yeah, totally. And number one on the list of the top six gaming achievements for the COVID app,

this one would be the hardest one to get. Like in video games, it's the 100% achievement check in completion yep achievement so basically you have to check into every single business

in New Zealand wow yeah and then good luck going into quarantine yeah when it sneaks out what a nightmare

well actually now that I'm thinking about it that's a really bad idea because it's encouraging you to go literally everywhere that's why someone on Twitter suggested maybe's encouraging you to go literally everywhere. That's why someone on Twitter suggested maybe you could get like a little voucher for fast food if you checked into X amount of places.

But then someone was like, that'll just encourage people to go around and scan and not actually go in. Yeah, imagine publishing that, those locations of interest. And the location of interest is everywhere. Lockdown again is what would happen. That is today's top six. All right, the latest is next. We all remember the hot priest from Fleabag. Well, he's back.

Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Now, if one thing severely went missing, and for good reason during the pandemic, it was cruisers. Yeah. They did not do well. They were like the hotbed for early COVID mass infection. And especially here in New Zealand, that cruise ship went to Australia, didn't it? And that's what kicked off Australia's COVID. And then there was that, what was the big one that everyone was locked in their rooms?

Oh, for ages and no one was letting them in. And did Japan eventually let them in? Let them in, yeah. I mean, it was just absolutely horrible. So I feel, I thought that people's minds wouldn't be able to move away from that when they thought of cruises in the future. But apparently, bookings for cruises skyrocketing right now. There was a documentary made about the cruise industry

and I got a feeling it was made before, it was well underway before COVID hit. And then when COVID hit, they were like, well, we can make this 90 minutes now. Yeah, right. Because there was a whole bunch about the bad stuff that happens in the cruise industry before. But then it got into

covid and it was like literally in the midst of covid yeah a norwegian place was like so what we're gonna do we're gonna get back into the cruise buzz yeah um because people love cruises and they sold tickets tickets got purchased tickets got bought they had to people had to pass the test yeah and then they went on the cruise and a crew member had COVID and then everyone on the boat had COVID. It was like, the world still hasn't got used to this. What made you

think this was going to be a great idea? I know. Well, these are advanced bookings for next year. So I wonder if it's um, uh... It's a bit of hope, certainly. People are sort of assuming like, surely by next year we'll be done. And then you wonder if they'll only let people on

that are vaccinated. There's a huge amount of hopeful thinking when it comes to booking anything. So yeah. And we had the announcement of the bubble, which is what, 10 days away. A story in the news today about some businesses warning their staff that if they're going to go on holiday

to Australia, check with work first. Because they might not let you come back. Because you might be stuck there and then your work is in this position where you've basically not turned up for your job. Because you've gone on holiday. And so a lot of workplaces are saying

we won't even do business travel to Australia because you could get stuck there and then there could be MIQ costs on the way back. So, yeah, if you are booking a bubble, check with work. Yeah, and if you are booking a cruise, just make sure there's a refund policy because I don't know if we're going to be jumping on board cruises. But then I'm guessing a lot of people had credit, right, to burn? Well, I just got an email this morning because I was supposed to be in Europe in the middle of last year. And so obviously that whole trip got refunded. Mostly I got my money back, but for some I got a credit.

And I just got an email from, what's that cheap one over in Europe? Ryanair. I had a connecting flight from like Venice to Paris or something like that. Just saying where I was supposed to be makes me sad. But I just got an email saying they've extended it to January 2022. So I feel like lots of places are going to do that because obviously I can't use it now. Even January 2022. Yeah.

I'm not planning a trip to Europe in January 2022. Not yet. They'll skip India as well. They're averaging 93,000 new COVID cases a day. A day. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Bakery of the Day. Bonjour, ma.

It's time for Bakery of the Day. We're going to put two listeners up against each other, both nominating a Nomi Nomi bakery and we'll pick a winner we're very hungry today if you can't hear it we've been talking about mince pies

off here and on here we just had a good actually we had a whole Dua Lipa worth of pie there didn't we yeah we did really got into some great pie discussion

but not just pies we want to know from your favourite bakery what is on offer and the best thing there quite often we do get into the slices yes yes But not just pies. We want to know from your favourite bakery, what is on offer? And the best thing there, quite often we do get into the slices. Yes. Yes.

We're often quite, you're a bit of a Lamington man. I'm a lolly slice girl. Yep. Bakery number one. Well, let's meet Tanya. Good morning, Tanya. Good morning. How you doing?

Really good, really good. Now, what bakery are you nominating for Bakery of the Day? Well, the best bakery in Rota Vegas and probably the North Island. Oh, okay, big call. Chewbacca. Yeah, Chewbacca. Chewbacca. Yes. Okay, so what is the go-to there for you? Oh, oh my God.

Oh my God. Oh, my God. Yeah, there is, look, there's probably nothing in there that I wouldn't shove in my mouth. Oh, really? Do they do, called ciabatta, do they do fresh breads? Well, that's how we started. He's a Swiss baker, and he used to tutor the pastry chef at Polytech. Oh. And he made this bread on the side, and it got so big He used to tutor the pastry chef at Polytech. And he made this bread on the side,

and it got so big that he had to, he used to make it in his garage, that he had to move to these industrial premises, which are right opposite my work. Oh, that is absolute dangers on him. Oh, my God. You know one of those little carbohydrates staring at you every time you're shitty at work? Honestly, I wear it every day.

Oh, no. Does he do the sweet treats as well? Yes. I'm looking at his website. Oh, my goodness. That looks amazing. There's a custard slice I can see here. And it's got your traditional white custard square glaze on the top.

But it's got chocolate dragged through custard square glaze on the top. But it's got chocolate dragged through it. It's got croissants. Look at the donuts. There's donuts. Oh, what's this? Nusskopfell. Have you had one of those? I've had one of everything.

So that's the thing. He keeps changing what's out on display. So he'll change up the baking. He'll bring in these things from overseas. Try this. Try that. That does look amazing. Try this. Try that. Wow. That does look amazing. The website does look amazing.

Tanya, just wait there. Bigger than number two. Frances, I tell you, you've got some tough competition this morning. Frances, good morning. Good morning. I can hear it. That was such a strong plug. Really?

A strong pitch. I've just seen their website, Frances. Now, what bakery would you like to nominate? I'm going to really mess up pronouncing it, but it's Le Voix Francais in Mount Roskill. I thought that was a beautiful bakery. That was good. I've been to France once, and that sounded perfect.

Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. So what kind of stuff do they do there? What's your go-to? So there's a little French bakery, so they do all the classics. You know, your little pain au chocolat.

Your tart au citron. Danish things. Yeah, everything. And everything's priced between like $3 to $6. Oh! Bonjour, bonjour. You hear the tight-ass Vaughan there get really excited. Do they have a baguette?

Yeah, they have all of your bakery goods. Look at the baguettes, actually. Like, there's a line out the door every weekend. Like, Saturday, Sunday, line out the door. Wow, okay, okay. Do they have guacamole? This is hard. This is hard because, Hayley, you've just looked at their Facebook page,

and, yeah, that looks delicious too. The breads they've got there. Look at those hotty cross buns, naughty boys. Yeah, naughty little hot cross buns and a little smack. Hold the line. It's time now for the panel to vote now for our favourite bakery. I'm probably going to go Tanya. Oh, no, but look at that.

I love that. What's that? That is a – this is from Le Voix Francais. That is a little, what's it called? Choux pastry filled with coca-co coffee custard. I just learned about a new dessert. I've seen this picture on the Le Voauvoise Fond Francaise. Paris Breast.

And it's pastry with praline flavoured cream. Yeah, that looked like a praline in the middle of a chocolate. There's an apple turn over here. Well, I voted for Tanya because the donuts and the stuff in Orotoroa, that looked beautiful. Who are you voting for, Hayley? I'm genuinely really torn. I'm going Le Voix Francais.

I love a little French bakery and this looks like the classy. This isn't far from your house. Isn't it? You could go. Give out your address on air and we'll work it out. Okay, got a pen and paper as well? Check your phone number down as well. So they can ring to make sure they're outside your house I'm going the French bakery because

I am fancy and it's near my house I am Going with ciabatta And rotorua I've got to Tanya, congratulations You've taken it out, but I tell you what,

France is an impassioned plea there for her bakery, and I tell you what, that's something no one knows. Sounds amazing. Sounds amazing. Well, I'm definitely going to take a visit there. Oh, yeah, well, you can let them know that they've won today. Like an exchange program.

Oh, sorry, I thought you meant you were going to go to the other bakeries. Like an exchange program. Go to each other's bakeries. You can let them know that they've won. We'll get a certificate in the post for Bakery of the Day. A treat as always. Fletchborner Megan, the podcast.

ZM. Fletchborner Megan with Hayley Sproul's ZM Detank. Good morning Jess, how are you? Oh, hello. Yeah, it's you. It's you, baby. It's you. Now Jess, we're going to put you right now on the imaginary ZM4 cord. You're pumping away the fuel.

It goes up in dollar amounts. And you can say stop at any time. When you say stop, you lock in that dollar amount. But if the car behind you buzzes and beeps and moves you on, you lose. Already. All right. Okay, you lose. Already. All right. Okay, no pressure. Here we go.

$5. $25. $75. $105. $135. $175 $175 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195 $195

$195 $195 $195 $195 The buzzer went off before you said it. No, we need a recall. We need a recall. Can we get an action replay? I believe we are going to get an action replay from producer Jared. My gut, and same yesterday when this happened, my gut was you were after the buzzer when you said,

I'm going to stop. You also didn't say stop. You should have said stop instead of I'm going to stop. Wait, let's see. Let's see. Let's see. Jess, this happened yesterday. I don't know if you were listening. All right.

Let's see. Here we go. $135. All right. $175. $195. I'm going to stop it there. Split seconds. I'm sorry, Jess it there. Split seconds.

I'm sorry, Jess. We cannot give that to you. You started speaking after the buzzer. No worries. That was fun anyway. Oh, Jess. Oh, my God. Jess, I'm so sorry.

That was like literally a split second. Oh. All good. Don't be angry at us. Be angry at the capitalist society that's forced you to be greedy, okay? That's their fault. It's society's fault. It's Ronald Reagan's fault.

Thanks. It's neoliberalism. Yeah. It's Ruth Richardson and other people from the 80s. Rodronomics, for example. Yeah. It's not your fault, Jess. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

The thing about savage teachers, teachers that, I mean, I think everybody had one. Yeah, I had. And then, like, now if you went back and you said, oh, you said some really, like, horrible things to me, they'd say something like, well, I just knew the sort of encouragement you needed. Oh, exactly.

That bullshit. That nonsense. I always knew you'd become successful. I was just pushing you. You had people giving you encouragement other ways and you needed a variety of encouragement. I will say I admire teachers for the work they do. Oh, me too.

And as parents have found out in the last year having to homeschool kids, it's not easy dealing with attention-seeking brats like, say, for example example Hayley Sproul and Vaughan Smith. Literally. I just feel you would have been both trouble. I recently was at my parents place and I went through

my old reports from like new entrance to seventh form and without a doubt, every single, without a word of a lie, every single year it says attention seeking. Every single one. I knew it, I knew it.

It'll be like, Hayley is a great student. She does well when she's not busy trying to get the attention of her classmates. So this is what got us onto this. A girl called Ashley has gone through her leaving book, where, you know, people write stuff when you leave. And she has found something from Mr. Seedat, her teacher. Oh, Mr. Seedat. Seedat, S-E-E- has found something from Mr. Seedat, her teacher. Oh, Mr. Seedat. Seedat.

S-E-E-D-A-T. Seedat. And he wrote to Ashley, Sometimes I go home and can't sleep because your annoying voice, it just doesn't stop, keeps ringing in my ears like the worst torture known to man. That is all. Good luck, Mr. Seedat. Wow.

Savage. That's gone viral because people are like, wow, that is a teacher not holding back. You can always... Absolutely savage. I love that because there always has to be that relationship between teacher and student where they can't do that. In the middle of class, when you're being, like myself,

a rebellious, attention seeking goth, they can't just look at you and be like, I effing hate you. They can't leave a paper trail. This is a paper trail. I know. Say it. I had one teacher at my high school who utterly hated me. She was my dean in

year 10. Hated me then. Is it because of your purple hair at the time? Yeah. And then in sixth form I had purple hair and she looked at me and she was like, there's no way you'll ever be a prefect. I was a prefect, suck it. But in, I think it was in year 10 when she was the

form teacher, my friend and her mum were in a parent-teacher interview and the woman, this teacher, her name is Shona, I won't say her last name. She said to my friend's mum, you want

to keep Lucy away from Hayley Sproul. She's no good. She's no good. She's bad news. Oh wow. Isn't that crazy? Like talking about me to another parent and then luckily that lovely parent was like, well she sounds fun and she encouraged our friendship and we've been lifelong friends ever since. What does she do now?

What does your friend do now? Did you let her down? Is this your friend that's addicted to meth that killed three people? Yeah. Right. Yeah. But she made that decision. No.

You blew the meth into her mouth. My friend has a law degree. She works for a law firm. Wow. But is also a writer and artist on the side. So she got a little, you know what I mean? She's a bit of a nerd. Wow, she's got to be everything. Sounds like a law degree. She works for a law firm. Wow. But is also a writer and artist on the side. So she's got a little, you know what I mean? She's a bit of a nerd.

Wow, she's got to be everything. Sounds like a real nerd. We want to know right now, 0800DARLSATM, you can text her 9696. What is the most savage thing a teacher said to you that you still remember

to this day? It sits with you, doesn't it? Because like, that has sat with you this whole time. But in a way, and I hate to say it, it did,

it egged me on to be like, I am going to be that prefect. I'm going to be a pre, and I hate to say it, it did, it egged me on to be like, I am going to be that prefect. I'm going to be a prefect. I'm going to show you. Yeah. Now I hope she turns

on the TV or the radio every morning and sees my purple hair. And sees who? Yeah, you were just another, you were just another girl. Remember me?

No. Queen of Agri-College. No. So 0800-DALS-IT-M text in 9696. What is the most savage thing a teacher said to you that you still remember to this day? Want to know the most savage thing a teacher said to you

that you can still remember to this day? There's something, there was always, this is horrible to say now that I'm an adult, there was something always fun about winding a teacher up. And you know when you adjust, you know you are on the cusp of tipping them over. Yup. And then you wonder why they lash out and say something horrible to you that you'll always remember.

Yeah, it's like, because they're staring in front of a room of bitchy 14-year-old girls. Private school as well. I've got daddy's money. Oh, my God. That would drive them mad. Yeah, daddy will sue you. Yeah. My father.

I don't have to do my homework. Yeah, well, I'm going to. And then if I was a teacher, I'd say, yeah, God, that would drive them mad. Yeah, Daddy will sue you. Yeah, my father. I don't have to do my homework. Yeah, well, and then if I was a teacher, I'd say, yeah, well, you know what, I'm going to sleep with your dad and I'm going to break up your mum and dad's marriage. Anonymous, what can you remember a teacher saying to this day? So I was training to be a teacher and it was my final practicum. I was six months away from graduating, going into a class for work experience and it was the day I met her. Hadn't even walked

into the classroom, met the kids, was just learning where the classroom was, literally. I introduced myself and the words that came out of her mouth were, you just failed. You just failed? Why? So she literally just said you just failed until you can prove to me

that you are good enough to teach my mokopona. Oh, wow. Wow. And you weren't even at school. Yeah. You're an adult and a teacher savaged you. Yep. And I literally ended up with tonsillitis and burnout

and had to take time off university to after that crack. I bet. Yeah. Brilliant. All right, Anonymous, thanks for sharing some text messages. Somebody said, my teacher told me I'd be a garbage collector. And I said, in front of the whole class, this teacher said I'd be a garbage collector. And I said, well, I'd be on more money than you.

And the teacher didn't like that. Somebody else said it wasn't to me, it was to my dad. My statistics teacher said that I would be doing better and advancing more if he was a better parent. That's out of line.

Yeah, dad said some choice and lovely words and then walked out of the meeting. I would have changed schools. I would have pulled my kid right out of there. Then you've got to buy a whole new uniform. Yeah, no, you're right. And drop them further to school.

I'd send them to a mufti school probably. Oh, even worse because then they want nice clothes and they just ruin them anyway. My year 10 science teacher told me to get out of the class because I was a waste of space. And I said, well, technically I take up less space because the gap between atoms is more than the

atom itself. They didn't like that I knew that. Trying to sass me on the way out. Lots of ones that I can't even really read. So I'm hoping they happen like in the 70s or 80s. Really? Yeah, they should certainly not have been happening recently. Little spankies?

No, like teachers having a go about weight. Weight. Lots of those. A couple of race ones in there. That's terrible. Yeah, some teachers giving some choice advice about future prospects for breeding for students, which will seem wildly inappropriate to even read. My year 12 math teacher told me at my parent-teacher conference

that I hope I look forward to failing because that's all I had to look forward to. Yep. May have been the motivation I needed, though, as I managed to scrape through and not fail any. My sixth form physics teacher told me and my mate if we weren't going to take it seriously, we should up and leave and take up a trade

like it was some sort of bad idea but now we both have a trade and we're earning really good money how good would it be to have a trade

it's so crazy back in the day isn't it crazy back in the day they're like well you don't want to get a trade like that's not

where you go you're going to go into the trade and then like you want to go to university for four years to study something

you're not really passionate about that you don't really know why you're there for and then come out with a massive amount of debt and it's still no qualification. Every time I get a bill,

because I'm renovating at the moment, every time I get a bill from a plumber or an electrician, I look at the amount and I think, should have gone

into the trades. Should have been in the trades. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. I stumbled across this on the internet yesterday.

This might not be news to some people. This might be news to some others. It's news to you too. It was news to me yesterday. The cube rule of food identification. The cube rule. The cube rule of food identification.

The Washington Post have posted about this. This won a Webby Award. Okay. For like solving conflict online. And it's even been in the Maryland courts. That is the official court system of the state of Maryland, fair, efficient, and effective justice for all. Right.

So there was a debate raging online at some stage, is a hot dog a sandwich? As it's a meaty product encased in a bun, an American hot dog. This is the traditional American hot dog. Not a corn dog. Yeah. We call that a hot dog on a stick.

Yeah. But that's like a corn dog. This is like an American hot dog. Right. I call that a hot dog on a stick. Yeah. But that's like a corn dog. This is like an American hot dog. Right. I wouldn't say that's a sandwich. That's a hot dog. But it's meat encased in bread. So that's why people said, well, what does this define as a sandwich?

Officially, the New York State, the Department of Taxation and Finance, ruled that it was. A sandwich? Yep. Oh, controversial. Anything that a sandwich for the sales tax purposes included things like hamburgers, hoagies, sub sandwiches. What's a hoagie?

Like a little bun? I always thought it was like a hot dog that wasn't a sausage. It's a submarine sandwich. Oh, right. It's a submarine sandwich. Oh, right. It's a sandwich made of a long roll filled with meat, cheese, and salad. So it's a sub. Like a sub. Yeah, just another name for a sub.

Your paninis, your open-faced sandwiches, your wraps, and your pitas, they were all classed as sandwiches. Okay. And that didn't sit well with people. No. A sandwich has a bread on the top and the bread on the bottom. And a pita's a pita. I wouldn't go to a pita-pit and be like, delicious.

Do you say pita or a pita? I say pita. I say pita-pit because it works better with the name rather than a pita-pit. Because it's not pita. Okay, yeah, right. Well, that's a pocket. That's not a sandwich.

Then somebody raised the point saying, well, if this is the case, are Pop-Tarts just a kind of ravioli? Yeah, fair call. A sweet ravioli. Yeah, yeah. Ravioli's just pasta with something encased in the middle, right? Yeah, or is it just a filled toast?

Is it a Jaffa? Yeah. Because that's... It got wildly out of control. Yeah. There were many arguments about what made a sandwich a sandwich, and that's when somebody invented the cube rule. Okay.

The cube rule is the unified theory of food identification. So basically what you need to do is if you ever need to know what you're eating, you draw a cube. And then there are nine different, sorry, six different official shapes for what you're eating, you draw a cube. And then there are nine different, sorry, six different official shapes for what you're eating. If it's just got one piece, this is for identifying dishes based on starch location. Yeah, okay. So this could be bread or it could be like a corn tortilla or it could be anything basically

that turns a salad into a sandwich, right? Right. So if it's just one piece of bread and it's on the bottom, that's toast. That's one. Two is a sandwich, top and bottom, but nothing on the sides of the cubes. This is where we get into number three, a taco, where three sides are covered. Side, side, bottom makes it a taco. Now, sushi is when it's got around.

It's a sushi situation where it goes around. Okay. Around the whole side situation where it goes around. Okay. Around the whole side, but open-ended. Then if it's boxed in, but one opening on the top, that's more of your bread bowl situation. Right. But wouldn't a bread bowl be all sides? Or that is all sides.

All sides and a bottom, but not fully enclosed. Fully enclosed falls under the calzone bracket. Wow. Okay. So that does settle every argument. So would enclosed falls under the calzoni bracket. Wow. Okay. So. That does settle every argument. So would a pie be a calzoni? A pie would fall into the calzoni.

But what would a pita be? A sushi. Like a filled pocket. No, because that's got two ends open. And that would be a wrap. I believe the pita would be in the bread bowl. Oh, yeah, because the bottom's closed up, ideally. Yeah, it's closed when it's open at the top.

Or it could be a taco. The gyro. Yeah. A gyro would also be in this all enclosed apart from the top situation. Yeah, right. I found this a very fascinating rule to look further into. It does settle the argument. It really settles it.

If you've ever had that argument. You can't say a taco is a sandwich. No. So why would you say a hot dog is a sandwich? So a burger is a sandwich? A burger is technically would fall under the sandwich in the sandwich family, yes. Makes sense. Well, there you go.

The cube rule if you're ever needing to settle an argument about what you're eating carb-wise. There we go. We're happy to help this morning. Keeping up to date with the news just became a little easier. As at Herald's new podcast, the front, is your short, sharp daily news podcast. Join me, Damien Venuto, every weekday morning as I chat with journalists and newsmakers going behind the headlines to break down what you need to know on the biggest news stories of the day.

Listen to The Front Page at nzherald.co.nz slash podcasts and follow us on iHeartRadio or wherever you get your podcasts. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. This is something I'm guilty of and I know for a fact you two are guilty of because you literally did it yesterday. But when you maybe go out and someone covers you and you say, I'll pay you back and you transfer your friend money for whatever reason and it comes to the reference

and instead of putting dinner or food, we put dillies. That's actually what I did yesterday. So we were paying our friend James back for tickets. He brought group tickets to a show and told us, hey, put $29 in the account. were paying our friend James back for tickets. He brought group tickets to a show and

told us, hey, put $29 in the account. Also, I felt James didn't come into that chat with like, hey, mate, how are you? Really looking forward to going to the show. Here are the details. He just literally sent me details, $29 each. Oh, he doesn't mess around. Don't mess around. And also, because it's so often that people will just

forget about it and never pay you back. So you've got to get in there sharply. Yeah. Get in there sharply, but give me some foreplay first. Well. Warm me up, you know. Yeah. A mortgage broker has chimed in on this. Okay.

This is why it might not be such a good idea, because she said the number one thing that people put is like 50 bucks, reference, drugs. Yeah, I love the drugs one. And so this mortgage broker is saying when they go to the banks that you're applying for your mortgage from and they're looking for income

and they're making sure the income is regular, they're making sure that the income is legit. And so they will look at what is coming into your account. And when they see things like drugs, it's something they genuinely take into consideration. But they know, surely people that are in the banking industry and the mortgage industry listening now, they know

that it's silly shenanigans. It's just joshing between mates because if you actually were paying back your friend for drugs, you'd put something like high tea or yum cha. Very high tea. Got a little bit too high. You wouldn't actually do that. You already do it because it's funny. Like high tea. Yeah. Or yum cha. Very high tea. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Got a little bit too high. High AFT.

You wouldn't actually like do that. You only do it because it's funny. I know, but. Or you think it's funny. Money for drugs. What did you put yesterday? Because I put XL adult fun toy. I put rugby trip payback lads, lads, lads.

Right. Yeah, I love that. James doesn't do rugby. No. I'm just hoping if he does go for a mortgage, they ask him who he plays for and he has to on the spot lie and he'll say some team that doesn't exist. Yeah, I love that.

Before Aaron and I became financially bound and I used to transfer him money, it was always farts, farts, farts. Farts! That's great, but you're paying for farts. Yeah. Farts, farts, farts. A mortgage broker can't deny you a mortgage because...

You pay for farts? Farts, farts, farts. I know. Well't deny you a mortgage because... You pay for farts. They're just... I know. Well, they're just saying if you're going to do it, it's actually something that just kind of makes your bank statements a little murky. I would love to have a tanty in a bank. You are telling me here at the Bank of New Zealand

that you will kink shame me for paying for farts? I will take these three pence, sir, and I will be gone. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Hey, you on the phone, I bet I can guess your mum's name. Well, it's time for I Bet I Can Guess Your Mum's Name.

I'm born on an absolute hot streak. I think you've got, like, the last three or four in a row. Oh, at least. At least. Well, Catherine joins us. Oh, at least. At least. Well, Catherine joins us. Good morning, Catherine. Good morning. How are you?

Good, good. Well, Vaughan now has five questions for you about your mum and then has 15 seconds to guess her name. Okay. Hi, Catherine. Hello. Oh, raised well. Raised well there.

She said hello politely. Okay. Okay. Five questions. Number one, what's mum's favourite fruit? My mum's favourite fruit is pretty much any stone fruit. You're talking your nectarines, your peaches, your plums, your apricots. I bet mum bloody loves a trip to Cromwell.

I'd chuck a Patsy on that list Would you? Yeah Patsy loves the stone fruits My mum's just a bit of a plain Jane She's a nanny She's a nanny girl She loves a nanny

No actually my mum loves a peach and a nectarine as well That's why I love peaches and nectarines Okay Because she said when she was pregnant with me Her major craving was peaches And peaches are a stone fruit There you go then That's major craving was peaches, and peaches are a stone fruit. There you go then. That's why I love peaches.

Right. Two. Pets. Her cat. Yeah, does she have any? And if she does, what are they? She has a cat. Just a cat, okay.

What's the cat's name? The cat's name is Alfie. Alfie. Okay, does she love it like it's one of her kids? I would say my dad likes the cat more, but my mum likes the cat as well. Is that unusual? That's unusual. My dad doesn't mind a cat, but mum's more of the cat.

Okay. She always comes over to visit my My dad doesn't mind a cat, but mum's more of the cat. Yeah. Okay. She always comes over to visit my cat, doesn't she? Your mum. She loves my cat. Oh, really? Oh, my gosh. Did I tell you one of mum and dad's cats has run away? Oh, no.

And hasn't come back. Oh, no. Yeah. It's probably gone to a farm. Oh, but she's already on a farm. Yeah. Interesting. Okay.

Third question. Does mum have siblings? Yes, my mum has five siblings. Holy moly. Okay, so what are their names? That'll give us a good indication of mum's name. Yep. So there's Diane.

Oh, my God. Look what I just wrote down. I just wrote down Diane. I'm going to have to cross that one. Oh, no. Diane's off the list. Diane, Lynn, Elaine, and David. Oh, they are absolute mum names, aren't they?

Yeah, totally. Classic. Classic. Ah. Okay, Vaughan's just... Whenever there's an answer, Vaughan will write down names. This is how this madness works. All right, next question.

What are Mum's weekend plans? She likes to do crafts, so she's probably got a craft afternoon booked in with her friends. What kind of crafts? That's cool. I like when Mums do crafts. Quilt making, card making, lots of crafts. So wholesome.

So wholesome. Very, very wholesome. I list a very wholesome name, so I don't need to take any off the list. No. Was that your fifth question? No, I've got another. One question remaining. I've got another question.

What's her, does she have a cute little nickname for dad? Without giving away, Dad? No, we don't want to tell you. If it's dad's name, don't tell us. But what do they call each other? They call each other like babe or hon or doll. No, she just calls him by his name, so I won't reveal what that is. And what about dad?

Back to mum, does dad have any? My dad calls her baby. Oh, dad. All right, well. So dad's like, hey, baby. And she's like, hello, Kevin. Yeah. All right, what is it, Kevin?

Catherine, Vaughan now has 15 seconds to guess your mum's name. If you hear your mum's name, yell out, stop, that's my mum's name. Are you ready? I am ready. All right, your time starts now. Christine, Patsy, Gay. Stop, that's my mum's name. Jesus.

Which one? Christine. That's my mum's name. That's why my mum's name was first, because of the stone fruit. Oh, my God, you got it first. Yeah, first try. And a world first. Wow. I got it first. You know, your mum's name was next on it first. Yeah, first try. And a world first. Wow.

I got it first. You know, your mum's name was next on the list. Yeah, I know. When you said stop, I thought it was Patsy. I was like, I don't know a lot of Patsys, but it's Christine. Bonus round. While you were on the phone, I'll have a go at guessing your dad's name. Well, Catherine, Vaughan now has to guess your dad's name.

One guess only, no questions. Vaughan, Christine and... My go-to would be Ian because that's my dad's name. Yeah, right. I don't think we're going to fluke this. We're not going to fluke this twice. Okay, so who are you going for? Christine and...

What's your dad's name again, Harley? Craig. Craig. Christine and Craig. That's got a ring to it. It's got a ring to it, but it's not verified. You don't think that's it? Okay. I just feel like that I got it first off. That's really weird. Yeah.

And I had a, I, when you thought it was Patsy, I was like, it's like Patsy. And then I have circled Patsy a few times. Yeah. Now, I know your dad's name's not Patsy. But your second mum's name. Oh, my God. Imagine if someone had a second mum.

That would be even harder for you, wouldn't it? It would be. That would be easier. You'd have to do a whole other round of questioning, I think. Yeah. Yeah. For another ones. Okay, we're running out of time We need an answer

We don't hurry genius Excuse me Leonardo da Vinci I'm wondering if the Mona Lisa's done yet Yeah but he didn't have the news to play at 8 o'clock And free fuel to give away That's right we're doing it before This is why we always do it after 8

I've got a bit more room to breathe Right Let the genius breathe. Okay, Leonardo DiCaprio, Da Vinci, whatever. Christine and Patrick. Um, that is correct. Yes! You know what?

It was 100% because I wanted Patsy. How do you do that? I wanted Patsy, but Patsy's not a girl's name, so I just went for the guy version of Patsy, which is Patrick. Oh, my God. Are you serious, Cassidy? People are going to think this is rigged. No, very well done.

Did you also, yeah, my face didn't give it away, eh? When I started saying Patsy, I was looking for clues, because you always know. I always know. And you were, like, not looking at me. So I was, like, I feel like, I didn't think it was going to be Patrick. I thought it was going to start with P because usually you look away when I get the right

letter. Okay, I'm going to start not knowing the dad's name until the last moment. Oh my gosh. I didn't get that away, but how did you get that? Catherine, congratulations. A double winner today. I bet I can guess your mum's. Pass on my

love to Christine and Patrick, please. I definitely will. I'll let them know. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan with Holy Spells. ZM Detank. Sianae, good morning.

Hi, good morning, everyone. Good morning. Now, did you hear the drama with ZMD Tank at 7am this morning? No. Oh, my gosh. Let me tell you what happened. The buzzer went, the toot happened, and she said, I think I'll stop now. And it was too late.

It was split second, Sianae. She lost out on $195. Now, we've had amounts go anywhere from $50 right up to $600. I think the lesson we learned, Sianae, this morning was when you feel it, stop. Say stop. Say stop. Yell out stop. Or just before

you feel it. Can I go to practice? You can go to practice. Or do you want to practice just saying stop? Really? Okay. Stop! So quick. Yeah, that's what we're talking about. That's really good, Sian. I'm excited about this.

All right, well, the dollar amount keeps going up. You say stop, yell stop at any moment to lock in that cash. Otherwise, if it buzzes, the car behind you beeps and toots and moves you on, you lose out the cash. Here we go. $5. $30. $65. $ $65 $100

$140 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185

$185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $185 $100, Sianay. Get that money. You have locked that in. That is all yours. Should we see how high it would have gone? Yeah. $230. $275. $300. $340.

$370. Oh, my gosh. $400. Oh, okay. $400. Oh, okay. $400 it went up to. Still though. Still though. What was it?

$95. $85. $85. $185. All yours, Sharnay. Congratulations. Woohoo! Thank you.

You're so welcome. Friday Flashback. Well, it's a Friday tradition. Pick a song. It's got to be at least 10 years old. Something we haven't heard for a while. And Hayley Janesbrough will now dive back into her teenage years. Into my teenage years.

I'm taking you right back to 2007. I was 17 years old. I was peak emo. When was that peak emo? 2006 was my emo. That was your peak emo. But 2007, I was still, was my emo. That was your peak emo. But 2007, I was still, I was lingering in there,

to be honest. You sent her through a few emo shots through the group chat. Very good. Shocking, aren't they? Yeah. Do you hang out outside BK?

I think we should share more manners rats. If it's okay with you, we should share that and you should almost recreate the poses now. That's a hot bit of Friday content. Yeah, we can absolutely share that and you should almost recreate the poses now that's a hot bit of Friday content

yeah we can absolutely share that so I was listening to some hard stuff but I didn't mind a bit of emo pop as well in the shape

of Paramore and now I can hear a lot of emo hearts screaming with joy right now I'm taking you back to 2007 off their album

Riot it was their second album and this was the hit from the album. It charted number one in the UK rock and metal charts. In the Australian top 100, it was 65, because it's still rocky. Would it have done well here? Do you have the chart position for New Zealand? 36. Oh, it peaked at 36.

This was everywhere this song. Over the whole year. Over the whole, oh, right, right, right. So that was its highest, but it did well in the UK. It's been used in lots of films, had lots of people covering it. 200 million views on YouTube. This is Misery Business from Parabour. It's your Friday Flashback on ZM. I waited a long run, she finally set me free I told him I couldn't lie, he was the only one for me

Two weeks and we caught on fire She scared it out for me, but I wear the biggest smile Whoa, I never meant to break But I got it where I want it now Whoa, it was never my intention to break To steal it all away from you now But God, does it feel so good Cause I got it when I want it now

And if you could, then you know you would Cause God, it just feels so It just feels so good Second chances, they don't ever matter People never change Looks are horny and nothing more I'm sorry, that'll never change Looks a whore, you're nothing more I'm sorry, that'll never change And about forgiveness, we're both supposed to have exchange

Sorry honey, but I passed it, I'm not looking this way Well there's a million other girls who do it just like you Looking as innocent as possible to get to They want it what they like, it's easy if you do it right Well I refuse, I refuse, I refuse Whoa, whatever meant to break But I got it where I want it now Whoa, it was never my intention to break

Just will it all away from you now But God does it feel so good Cause I got it where I want it right now And if you could then you know you would. Cause God, it just feels so. It just feels so good. I've watched his wildest dreams come true. Not one of them involving you.

Just watch my wildest dreams come true. Not one of them involving you just watch my wildest dreams come true not one of them involving Whoa, I never meant to break But I got it where I want it now Whoa, I never meant to break But I got it where I want it now Whoa, it was never my intention to break. To steal it all away from you now.

But God, does it feel so good. Because I got it where I want it now. And if you could, then you know you would. Because God, it just feels so. It just feels so good It's Paramore, Flashback Friday, Misery Business on ZM, Hayley's pick. The only Hayley that was more emo than I was, Hayley Williams, lead singer of Paramore. How cool is she?

Well, I don't know lately. She's doing a lot of solo stuff, isn't she now? Yeah, I think she's toned it down a bit as well. But that was a good exertion of energy there. Yeah, get a heart going. A bit of rage. Good feedback? Amazing pic, taking me back, rocking out in the car with my kids,

looking at me like I'm crazy. Now, that surmises the entire situation, doesn't it? Because a lot of emos grow up to be like mums now. A lot of my emo pack are either pregnant, married, or already have kids. Not you, though't it? Because a lot of emos grow up to be like mums now. A lot of my emo pack are either pregnant, married, or already have kids. Not you though, eh? Not me, mate. I'm standing true to the rock and roll.

I'm going to get my piercings put back in. I had my flesh tunnel surgically closed. Everybody told me they were a bad idea at the time, but I couldn't be told. Now my earlobes look a bit funny. Like a fucking bum. They do look like a here at the time but i couldn't be told now my earlobes look a bit funny they do look like they do yeah always yeah um the flesh tunnel through yeah um i still know every word my little emo heart is happy which is very ironic. Good pick from you. What a banger. My day started rubbish, but now it's going to be okay.

Yes. Yes. What is this tripe? Okay. Well, there's always one negative. Ladies and gentlemen, moving on now. Before your very eyes, burgeoning and burgeoning. Burgeoning? Burgeoning, that works, doesn't it?

Yeah. Can I get a definition check on burgeoning? Burgeoning? Burgeoning, that works, doesn't it? Yeah. Can I get a definition check on burgeoning? How good would this be? Beginning to grow or increase rapidly. Flourishing. Flourishing, burgeoning. Yeah, burgeoning. Word check on burgeoning.

Yes, it's what I was after. In front of you, you are witnessing a friendship burgeoning. Okay, flourishing. Flourishing, blossoming between Carl Fletcher and Hayley Sproul. These two little, you've even both worn

white t-shirts today. You've coordinated your outfits. We coordinated, yeah. You guys are getting on like a little house on fire. We hung out yesterday. Yeah. Outside of work.

Outside of work. They've had a hangout. And now Vaughn, you find this quite amusing. Well, you're both supposed to be my friends. I did not want to go to your weird spin class. It was not weird. Well, no, we just went to a gym class.

But you both belong to the same gym. A, I don't belong to the gym. I'm not paying to ride a bike. That's ridiculous. We can get you a friend's pass. I don't want that. Because B, and second on my list, is you both said that I'd likely get motion sickness

on this weird theatrical spin class where you're peddling around the universe. What's it called? The trip. It's called the trip. And you just do stationary bikes in front of this, like, tripped out, like, giant screen. We went to, like, a kind of futuristic,

warped Japan yesterday and it was just a beautiful ride. I sweat and I sweat so much. We were sweating. I looked down and both of our forearms were dripping and that's friendship when your forearms are sweating together. Yeah, yeah, you're sweating together. Yeah.

So that's kind of like you guys have taken it. But are you jealous? A little bit. You could have come. We both individually make friends. Because we've already made plans for next week. But now it's what? We're going to do more classes next week.

What classes are you doing next week? Well, just some other ones. We'll run them by me, I'll see if I'm interested. You won't be. On Monday, we're doing grit cardio. Absolutely not. Which is 30-minute high-intensity interval training. Nope.

And then on Tuesday, we're doing ceremony, which is kind of like F45 circuit. You don't even need to tell me what it is, the name alone. No. And then we're already planning like a little wine night. What? And then on Friday, we're going out. Oh, I don't want to go out, but I do also want to be invited.

So someone's a little bit jealous. You don't have to be jealous. Look, your friendship has lasted 17 years. I'm not moving in on your bestie. Well, it feels like it. And you know, Vaughn, we've got our own thing going on. Yeah, well, you can call it friendship if you want. You just called it a thing, which was...

But your thing's more work. Have you actually hung out outside of work? No, connected to work. You're always connected to work. We drove to Rude Boy that time. You saved me from that time. I nearly got hit by a bus that was on the same walk. No, that was getting a snack on work time.

So technically, you haven't done anything. We got drunk on work time that time. Yeah, we did. That was nice. A number of times. But again, work time, not outside of.

Okay, well, what are you trying to do? Tell me that you're better friends with Hayley than I am. Guys, there's plenty of me to go around. Real kick in the teeth.

It's an interesting thing because making friends as adults, you know, it's not easy now. It's weird making friends as adults, isn't it? And I don't need any more friends.

I'm not looking for more friends. If you hadn't come into this job, I wouldn't have made an effort to, like, hang out and be, you know, because you just don't because you have your friends and you're done. And you're done. Yeah. It's unexpected. But what about the people, you might be listening right now, and you just met your newest best friend at work. Right.

And then, you know, the moment in Step Brothers where they're like, did we just become best friends? Yep. Yep. You might have had one of those moments. And that's what I want to know about this morning. I want to know about those moments. When you realize that your colleague was now your friend.

Oh, right. You've taken it from a colleague was now your friend. Oh, right. You've actually did something. You've taken it from a colleague space to a friend space. So you want to hear of those stories when people, yeah, they went outside of work and did a friend's thing. Yeah. With someone they work with. Yeah, and who made the first move?

Oh, my God, maybe people have a cute story of how they asked them out. Because that would be hard, right? Yeah. Not romantically. No. Ask them out. Friend. Would you like to do a thing outside of work hours?

Yeah. Oh, how awkward. How horrible. I know, because then what if they say no? It's like asking someone out. You'd have to change jobs. You'd have to go get a new job. I assume you'd have to quit.

You would have to. I assume you'd quit on the spot. Okay, well, let's take some calls. 0800-DANCE-AT-M. You can text in 9696. When did it go from colleague to friend and how did it happen? Yeah, maybe there's a cute little story.

Maybe you had to get the courage to ask them. We want to know from you this morning when it went from colleague to friend. It's happening right in front of my eyes. We've mentioned it. It's flourishing.

Yeah. If I was to get married next weekend, I'd invite you both. Yes. Yeah. Oh, that's great. I've been waiting for ages. It'll be fun. Be warned.

But we'll see when I'm not here and some time passes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll do one of those WhatsApp groups. Yeah. Yeah, do I get to stay in the chat? So when did it go from work friend to actual friend? And maybe there's a cute story of how it happened. Because it is, it's hard making adult friends.

Oh, it's really hard. This is on the back of the fact that Fletch and I went to a gym class together yesterday, outside of work hours. In fact, we both went home and then re-met up. And now Vaughn's trying to organise a thing next Friday. Yeah, now we're going out to dinner. So, Ashley, you guys were's trying to organise a thing next Friday where we go out. No, actually you guys will always do something. I was already hanging out.

And you've made it a three-way. You bring your wife. The only way I ever get invited to a four-way is if I bring my wife. No one wants me just... If you're not bringing your wife, you're not invited to the foursome.

That works at golf and other things that involve four people. Yeah, all right. Well, you can come to dinner if you bring your wife. So we want to take your calls this morning. Tegan, how did you go from work friends

to actual friends? I was young and I was working at a bank and one of my colleagues was this guy that used to love messing with everyone trying to make them wonder if he was gay or straight it was a bit of a game he had

with the older women that we worked with we got along, we were polite and you know helped each other out and everything but we both caught each other perving at the same dude oh right, yeah and you were like, this is it. This is my new bestie.

Yeah, and then after that, we kept playing the game. We're like, I didn't say anything. And then I won tickets to Queenstown. I was only 21 at the time, I think. Right. And I took him instead of my boyfriend. Wow. Yes.

Wow. A lot more fun, isn't it? Wow. So you Wow. A lot more fun, isn't it? Wow. So you got a double there. You not only got a new friend, but you got a gay best friend. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, he was awesome.

And even after that, we used to, because all the ladies used to drink so much. God, no wonder they have bank errors. Yeah. Brilliant. Hey, Tegan, thanks for your call. We'll take some more calls. Ebony, how did you go from work friends to good friends? Well, there was five of us.

I hope my old boss isn't actually listening. Well, let's not use actual names or work names. Oh, no. She'll definitely know. We all hated our boss. She was a nasty, nasty lady, and we all kind of, like, bonded on that sort of front. I was the youngest at 25,

and the oldest was, like, 43. And we all, like, had discussions and things like this about how the boss was nasty. And then just one day, we all decided just to go out for dinner. It's been two years, and we still catch up. We've been to baby showers. We've been to funeral theaters.

Oh, I love that. Yeah, we are the closest group ever. Hatred brought you together. It does. It's such a strong bond, hatred. Ebony, thanks for your call. Phoebe, how did you go from work friends to good friends? So at the beginning of the like, the COVID last year,

I came back to New Zealand, and one of my, this other girl had come over from another country, and we were at a work training thing. Yep. And we were, like, we were, you know, there was really awkward, like, group bonding sessions. Oh, I hate those. Forced bonding, yeah.

Yeah. So this, like, tall, this tall, blonde girl stood up, and she's like, Hi, I'm Ellen. I like gin and cats. And I was like, Oh, you're cool. You too liked gin and cats. I think I could like Ellen as well because I also like gin and cats. Me too.

I'm in this group. Let's make a force. It was really great. And let's not invite Vaughn. I got really awkward. Oh, okay. I'm in this group. Let's make a four. It was really great. And let's not invite Vaughn. I got really awkward. Oh, okay. I got really awkward. And I do this thing where I don't think about what I say.

So then instead of calling her Ellen, I started calling her Steve, like that meerkat thing. Steve. Oh, Ellen. Ellen. Ellen. Steve. Oh, wow.

And are you still friends to this day? Yeah. So now, and then she was like, oh, okay, Alan, Alan, Steve. Oh, wow. And are you still friends to this day? Yeah, so now, and then she was like, oh, okay, you can call me Steve and you can be my friend. Oh, and you can call me Steve. That's brilliant. Phoebe, thanks. You called some text messages in. Somebody said that she got broken up with, and another girl at work, who I worked with, but wasn't very close with but i said

hello to every morning yeah also got dumped the same week i didn't know that she messaged me on instagram when it worked saying hey i heard you've been in a breakup i've also been in a breakup if you want to get a drink let's hang out and now we're best friends oh that's so nice yeah somebody said i've worked for the company i work for for over 11 years and I refuse to socialise with any of them outside of work. That's not what we're talking about. You grinch. That's not what we're talking about. But they could work with boring people.

I'm 12 years deep into a Robert Harris staff friendship. What a sentence. We call ourselves the Mafia Wives. Oh, okay. Oh. That's cool. I like that. That's a little bit scary.

They've probably had people kill. I worked with a person for seven years. I found out he was my second cousin after my grandfather passed away. And we both filed for the day off to go to the funeral. And then we're like, oh my God, we're related. Now we're best friends. Love that. Touching stories.

You're really beautiful. Touching stories. I'm really looking forward to our future as friends. Same. My workmate and I became friends outside of work when he sent me a picture

of his penis and I went to his house for Netflix and chill. That's a lot. Okay, yeah. And now they're close? A lot, yeah. I am clear that I don't want

that from either of you. Okay, no, you weren't. Yeah. Absolutely not. Certainly not. That's what I'm sure. I'll make it clear that I don't want that from either of you. Okay, no, you weren't. Absolutely not. Certainly not. I'll just delete these drafts then. Trying to find the good lighting. Unsend, unsend, unsend. I asked my workmate if I could go to the gym with him.

Started there and now we've been really good mates for two years. This is what we've got to look forward to. We've started the gym. We've got dinner next week with the Smiths. You've got the gin and the cats with Alan. Great times. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day

Let's talk about teeth baby Let's talk about you and me Let's talk about fillings and Enamel Braces and Ginger vitamins Ginger vitamins I've been thinking a lot about the dentist

Because I went to the dentist I went to the hygienist and the dentist In one day This week Wow money bags Good Now I do one of those Payment you know

Like pay every month And then you just Claim your What? Your appointments I was going to get One of these What is this?

It's so good Makes you feel like it's free What do you mean? Luminos Luminos Non-paid endorsement For Luminos But you need to

Explain yourself You pay like 20 bucks a month In a year It's like 300 bucks a year or something and you get and you get two

hygienist appointments and one dental checkup and exams with x-rays and 10% off anything you get done okay maybe I need to get in on that I do that as well

I'm an unpaid endorsement yeah do you? they just they get you don't they that's how they get you and I have to say they were listening to Lumino

Mount Eden they were listening to ZM when I Eden. They were listening to ZM when I was in. Oh, maybe they can fix that temporary cab that you got 10 years ago. Yeah, because it is, I just checked my watch.

It's, oh yeah, 10 years since I went to the dentist. Like crazy, eh? Vaughan, is it? It's more like 10 and a half now. Vaughan! I know, Hayley Sproul, I know.

I know. You have to go every year at least. Well, it's like driving a car without a warrant of fitness. It's only a problem when the police pull you over or your teeth fall out. Vaughn, do you floss? Oh, yeah, I'm a big fly flosser. I bleed. I floss for coops.

I floss for coops. You won't get a lecture about flossing, but they will give you a lecture. It's gotten to the point now I don't want to have to go to the dentist for the judgment of. No, they don't care. They will. Oh, they will. They'll be like, what's the story here? When did you get that?

I'll be like, 10 years ago. They'll be like, what are they saying? I'll say it was a temporary crown. So when I got a crown, I got the temporary one that you've got. And that lasted like a couple of weeks until I went back. And they glue it down, and then they have to crowbar and drill it off. Yes. So mine broke in half five years ago, and I swallowed half of it.

I was in Fiji at the time, and I just thought it was a fish bone. So I was like, down you go, and I swallowed it. Now, it might be mercury, and I'm dying, but that's by the by. So I'm used to the new shape of my tooth. Right. Okay. But it is bad. I check on it every now and then and it's certainly not healing itself.

Oh my God. What are you giving me? I'm booking you an appointment. You have to go. Also, I've got now like with our girls, it's kind of like brush your teeth and check your teeth and they're like doing a little bit of like flossing and they're trying like adult toothpaste and stuff. I know I feel like a hypocrite.

But anyway, these things happen. What? Who's messaged? Yeah. Oh yeah, that's true. That Jared, producer Jared's girlfriend works at a dentist. Yeah. And they have talked about the fact that I'm rocking a temporary crown from 10 years ago. Get in there then.

Get the midi to take. Wait, that's what he did say. He said you should get the midi fit. They specialise in this sort of stuff. Oh, yeah. They specialise in that kind of stuff. But see, the minute you say specialise, I'm seeing a couple of decimal points move one place that way. Oh, my God.

You can afford it. You bought a robot vacuum cleaner before you got growled. My uncle Roger went in and they said, oh, it's going to cost a few grand. And he's like, well, how much to rip them all out and get falsies? And it was less, so he went with that option. I was like, that's my man. I sometimes think about it.

I've got kind of like troubled teeth. You know, they're very, I don't know. Yeah, whereas Sade, my wife, never had a filling in her life. Yeah. Unbelievable. And goes in and gets clean and stuff. And they're like, oh, yeah, no fillings required. You need to go.

Well, today's fact of the day is about teeth. Okay. And I would never thought about this. But the only sensation teeth can feel is pain. Unlike any other part of your body that can feel, teeth can only register pain. Because if you rub them, it's not like... I was just giving my tooth a nice rub.

That's the thing. It's like, ah. Do that. I like that. There's parts of your body that can experience pain. For example, the nipple I'll talk about that, it's very close It can experience pain but it can also experience pleasure

As Hayley is now Just giving that a quick touch up Especially your big areoles Excuse me, they're not What an absolute pleasure plate that is Like a shot shootittery board. They are big and they're loaded with pleasure. And they're coloured like a dark salami.

Do you have big nips? I don't have a big nip. He's got giant nips. Oh, that's not a big nip. That's not a big nip. Told you. That's not a big nip at all. Show me your nip.

He's got the tiniest nip. Oh yeah, that's a petite nip. I know. And it's on the side. I'll show you mine. While we're at it. Absolutely not, no. This friendship's really escalating.

Yeah. But I'd never thought about it. But your teeth, like, drink something hot, your teeth hurt, drink something too cold, your teeth hurt, eat something too sweet, your teeth hurt. The dentist gives it a bit of a crack. It's not like...

Yeah. Imagine if... Bite a minty too soon. Yeah. Your teeth hurt. Your teeth don't tickle. No, nothing. But you know how the part of your brain that registers pain is next to pleasure.

Imagine if there was a, if I have a stroke, I hope the thing I come out of it with is the little bit of my brain that registers pain from the teeth turns it into pleasure. And then you'll find- Imagine drinking a cold, cold thing. You'll be like- Biting into a fruit juice. You're just biting. Chewing on something hard. Going to the dentist

and being like and trying to talk to you and you're like I think you know what we should do next week is do a thing on air where Vaughan goes to the dentist. Yeah.

Or we bring a dentist in here. Don't they have those mobile caravans? Yeah, we're going. They're actually very busy going to schools in areas with poor dental hygiene. They don't need to come actually very busy going to schools in areas with poor dental hygiene.

They don't need to come in here to check on one. You haven't done it You have poor dental hygiene because you haven't been to the dentist in 10 years. But every now and then I'll blow on Sade's face

I'll be like, does that smell? And she's like, no. And I'm like, well, that's how I know it's not bad yet. She's not a dentist. No, it's when they rip

the cap off that it smells. Yeah, and they need to get in. I don't want to take the cap off then. If it's like the lid on the bin. No, it's got to go. Keep the lid on the bin. So today's fact of the day is teeth can only register the sensation of pain, not pleasure

or anything else. We didn't do the fact of the day jingle on the way out. We're too late. We're late. We're running behind. We're cutting it. Shivers, we are late. We are.

Fleshforn and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Jesus take the wheel. Low rise jeans are back. And I'm not happy. Jesus just ploughed the car into a tree. He doesn't. He's a toga guy. Oh I know. So Bella Hadid. Beautiful super model. She posted

a photo of herself on social medias and she's wearing a pair of low-rise Von Dutch jeans. Straight out of 2002. Von Dutch's? Yeah, yeah. Still a thing. I saw someone wearing an Ed Hardy t-shirt this week.

Was it Mike Hosking? Edward Hardell. So, it's time we address that they are slowly making a rise They've been popping up left, right and centre on some celebs Miley Cyrus has been wearing them Bella Hadid A number of people

They're the gene of the thin aren't they? They're the gene of the thin Everyone who's wearing them has those little pancake tummies where your hips just kind of hit the bone and go back down to your legs. All power if you can pull that off. All power to you. But I just think they're so ugly.

After a year of pandemic, do we need these coming back in? I'm stuffing the muffin right down. Because I couldn't believe when the mum jeans were back in. Yeah, the high-waisted. I'm a mum Gina. You're awaisted. I'm a mum Gina. You're a mum Gina. I'm a mum Gina. I was a skinny Gina,

but now I've just been told that they're not allowed anymore. They're not cool. So you're not listening to what Jen said, I think. So I'm a mum Jean, but the higher, the better. Any pant.

These are a pair of just black pants from old Moochie, and they're super high, and that's how I like it, all tucked away. You wear a high pant. I love a high pant. So we asked on Instagram,

how do you feel about the return of low-waisted jeans? A resounding no. 92% said no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. No. Whereas the other 8% are like, I can fit them, so yes. Yeah, so I'm going to guess that 8% is an absolute toned, taut size 4. Do you think they look good on the people that can pull them off?

No, I hate them. You just hate them full stop. Oh, you're going to get the whale tail out the back with your G-banger. Yeah. Peek-a-booing. Then you bend over and then it's crack attack. It's just not for me. So the low-rise jeans, I'm just not super clued on.

Yeah. Christina Aguilera, Dirty, the music video, low-rise jeans. I mean, they're super low. They were ultra low. Early 2000s. If you have to do a trim to wear the jeans, they're too low. Right, okay. I'm talking about the pubis.

Yeah. And then on the back, were these the jeans that went with the G-string above the jean in the early 2000s? Yeah, see, even I've got high-waisted undies. Well, I don't even have the right undies to wear. Oh, my God. Maybe that's the fashion this time around. Unvisible high undies are up.

Okay, maybe I could get on board then. With a low jean. And it just says Bonds on the top. You won't catch me dead in a pair of low-rise pants. Mark my words. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the top. You won't catch me dead in a pair of low-rise pants. Mark my words. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Here's some disturbing news for you. The Duke and Duchess of Sussex, Prince Harry and Megan,

since moving to their house in Santa Barbara in America, the police have been called to their house nine times. They've called them because what? People are on their property. Yeah. Because people are trying to get in. Oh my God. Isn't that terrible?

Leave them alone. Phones going off, alarm activations, property crimes, people damaging their property. That's terrible. If you were like a Kim Kardashian level of famous or their level of famous, you'd have to get like a mansion with walls, eh? Yeah. And then do that thing they do in South America with walls

and just like smash bottles into the top of the walls and set them in concrete. I'm sure there's a slightly nicer way of doing it, but yeah, sure, let's smash bottles and set them in concrete. I'm sure there's a slightly nicer way of doing it, but yeah, sure, let's smash bottles and set them in concrete. Yeah. Well, because remember, Harry didn't know that when he left the royal family that his security would be taken away. Yeah.

And so when they moved to America and they didn't have security and they were just swarmed, they had to sort it out pretty quickly. I'd get an ex-team of Navy SEALs. Yeah. Like'd get an ex-team of Navy SEALs. Yeah. Like in America, ex-team of Navy SEALs. You want smash glass on the roof and SEALs? Oh, oh, oh, hopping around.

What is wrong with you? Navy SEALs. Navy SEALs. They're specially trained, but they still smell. The UK police protection was withdrawn after they stepped down, and the Duke admitted he never thought he would have his security removed when they broke away from the monarchy. He said, I was born into this position. I inherited the risks.

That was a shock to me, which is true. It's not really his choice to be this super famous. So now they're going to have to pay like super high costs for security. And obviously it's not going very well. Just before when you mentioned the walls, did you see Grand Designs last night? No. No.

He bought this old church right next to a graveyard. Yeah. And it was all in pounds. He spent four and a half million pounds. Like, so what? In a graveyard. And because it's a historic building, he couldn't build up, but he wanted the space.

He dug down and he dug within like a metre of the nearest like gravesite and dug it all out and put like a basement, had a 30 metre lap pool in it. Like it was an insane episode of Grand Designs. Did it look cool though? Yes. When it was all finished, it kind of looked, not how I would spend

The equivalent of What would that be 8 million 9 million New Zealand dollars Not how I would spend it What if you But it looked cool Dug next to a graveyard

And you dug a basement And you put a window And you could see coffins Okay that's a bit morbid Why not put a window Looking out the window Why not put a window In the coffin as well

Yeah hello A little skeleton Yeah you go in love A little skeleton Why not put a window in the coffin as well? Yeah, hello How you going love?