ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - 9th March 2021

Episode Date: March 8, 2021

Top 6: Hosking  Iris Scanning  Audio Ninja Warrior!  Producer Jared is on the hunt!  How different are your Ex and current Partner?  Hayleys Hair  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan with Hayley Sproul podcast. It's thanks to McCafe. Download the Maccas app to get McCafe rewards today and mailbag for me today. Oh, what'd you get? What'd you get? Somebody has sent, now that I don't know, there's no name. The sender's details, Wellington listener. Oh, mysterious.

And it's got an address here in Porirua in Wellington, a phone number. And it's addressed to Fletch, Vaughan and Megan and in brackets Hayley and then in brackets for Fletch though in brackets, closed brackets. Can I just borrow that? I'm just going to see what this address is. Okay. Okay. What are you going to Google it? Yeah, I'm going to Google it and see what I got.

Okay. And they have sent me a three in one soil tester to test the moisture, light and pH levels with one device. Yeah, they're really good. Because I'm renowned for killing houseplants. Yeah. This is going to be amazing. I've got one of those. They're really good. You just probe it. Because sometimes you just don't know.

And then a plant starts misbehaving. You're like, what do you want? You want more water? You want less water? You want more light? Could I be stabbing the roots with this? Oh, yeah, but there's lots of roots going on under there. Gently. Gently insert. The stabbing is where you've gone wrong there.

Okay, so yeah. Go home and be like, pat. So gently insert. And then it's amazing. So it tests the light. So then I'm guessing the light tells you if your plant's in a good place. Yeah, but each plant wants their own thing. So what you need to do is you look up the name of your plant

and what it wants. Well, Vaughan sent me an app at the weekend. Which one do you use? No, so I got targeted advertising to it because I was trying to work out what's not going wrong with Sade's plant, but I needed to trim it. So I did some Googling on, like, how to trim a house plant, and then it promoted Blossom to me.

And Blossom is one that you download and you start, and it tells you, you're like, today I wooded my fiddle leaf fig. And then it will be like, okay, in two weeks I'll send you an alert because that's how often you need to wood a fiddle leaf fig. Okay, see, I didn't know when you sent that about the alerts. I need to do that because that's perfect. Alerts, where to put them, how to do it. Yeah, it was a whole thing.

It was really great. Because I've put, we've moved house and I've put my fiddle leaf fig in the window and I thought, watch this baby grow. No, shade. Yeah. But not, it needs medium light, not direct. Yeah, it's been in the direct light and it got burnt. We repotted ours, our fiddle leaf.

It's a monster. It must be eight foot tall. Really? Because mine stunted. Ours is growing so massive, it's in a new pot. Yeah. Which is going to give it more room to grow. Because I'd put my monstera in a bigger pot and it's just gone crazy.

Oh, mine is ginormous. Backbreaking. We had a massive monstera and Sade was like, oh, it's too big now. And gave it to somebody else. Oh, how dare she. I know. We had a massive Monstera and Sade was like, oh, it's too big now and gave it to somebody else. Oh, how dare she? I know. Loves me a bit. Well, thank you to the anonymous listener for giving me the soil test.

I really appreciate that. Best of luck, Fletch. I'm going to go home and stab it in my Monstera. No, no, no. Gently insert. Into the Monstera. That's actually my life motto. Gently insert.

Whatever you do in life Gently insert Gently insert myself into things Situations Yep let's stop there I think we'll leave it there eh ZM Head music

Lives here Fleece Fauna Megan The podcast Good morning Welcome to the show Fleece Fauna Megan With Hayley Sproul Wow

I need to watch this interview. We can't even get it yet. I've only watched clips. It's like a little tease. How did Oprah twist the arm of pirates everywhere to keep it from the torrent sites? I don't know. I was doing my best pirating yesterday.

And you couldn't find it on the high seas? I couldn't find it anywhere. Nothing be blowing on the horizon. There she blows. I've watched so many little clips of it now, though, that I've really pieced together my own version of it in my head. Right, because was it two hours? Yeah, two hours long of them just sitting there.

Wow. And a beautiful sunny day, I will say. Backdrop. Did look lovely. Was that Oprah's house? I'm not sure. Probably. She's got a lovely body.

$2.5 billion she's worth. I read about her properties. Because I wondered they paid, CBS paid like $9 million. US dollars. US for that interview. How much would Oprah have got? Does that include what? Oh, I don't know.

They would have paid Harpo, right? Or did they pay, I don't know, Harry have paid Harpo right Or did they pay I don't know Harry and Meghan Maybe she did it What's the word Well I don't know Lots of Lots of

Info From that interview And this morning We will We'll go through A lot of it The big moments Five

We've got five Of the biggest bombshells And it was hard to choose five There were twenty There were bombshells. And it was hard to choose five. There were 20. There were bombshells coming left, right, and centre the whole time. Do you know that they were going to live in New Zealand? I'll take that off the bombshell list. Yeah, I heard that they considered it.

Could you imagine if they lived here? If they just lived in like Parnell. We talked to Meghan Markle when she was just on Suits. Well, just on Suits. Just on Suits, which was just an absoluteits. Or just on Suits. Just on Suits, when she was just an absolute nobody, when she was just a bombshell actor. She did her honeymoon here, and she got a camper van with her then. Was her husband, was it like a movie producer or something?

Yeah. And she was staying at a campground, and a little boy slid his head under the shower door and looked up at her naked. That was her story. Yeah, there's someone in New Zealand now that's probably a grown man that has seen Meghan Markle nude in a campground shower.

Yeah. No one's ever come forward, have they? Nope. To admit that, but yeah. Do you know, CBS, so they paid all this money to get this show on. So to get an ad, to get a 30-second ad on during the show, like a McDonald's commercial or something, $325,000 for 30 seconds.

That's not bad because they were expecting Super Bowl-level viewership for that interview. And that's actually what we charge McCafe to be associated to our show as well. Absolutely we do. because they were expecting Super Bowl-level viewership for that interview. Wow. And that's actually what we charge McCafe to be associated to our show as well. Absolutely we do. Every time you say McCafe. It's $325,000. I'll say the show is thanks to McCafe. Download the Macca's app to get McCafe rewards today.

Ching, ching. Ching, ching. There we go. We're basically the Harry, Megan, Oprah interview every morning on the show. Coming up, the top six. Yeah, Mike Hosking has got a Prime Ministerial-sized hole in his show every Monday morning.

Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern said, we'll go on as the occasions call for, as issues arise, but it doesn't need to be regularly every Monday morning. I'll just check with Executive Intern Anya. The Prime Minister hasn't cancelled her slot on our show, has she? No.

No. We have shimmied from a lovely Friday to a lovely Wednesday. Oh, yeah. Monthly. We're doing monthly now. Yes, but that's been the same frequency for a while. Because she upped it when it was the election. Because they want to get on your lots when it's election year.

Yeah, and this is a cool, cool channel, you know? Is it? It's a cool channel. We may have been the station Hosking referred to as loving her softballs rather than delivering her fast-paced quickballs. Well, Hosking's needs to fill a slot every Monday. Yeah, so I've got the top six things to fill the Prime Ministerial-sized hole

on the Mike Hosking radio show. Next on the show, though, something that's launched in the UK. Yeah, they call it soft play there. We call it chipmunks. You know those places you take your kids and you shut the pool gate behind them and you just let them run around like rabid little filthy gremlins. Do you remember lollipops? Lollipops play there?

Yeah, lollipops? Lollipops playlist? Yeah, lollipops. Oh. Lollipops. Well, the UK's doing something with those parks that may be of interest to you. Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast.

ZM. So soft play is what the British call the likes of your lollipops playgrounds, your chipmunks, your basically where you can go in and you can set your kids free and then they come out crying

because some other kid did broken rules Did something bad What about the trampoline parks Are they the same But different No they're just trampoline parks They're just for adults anyway

Adults are allowed in there You just gotta be You gotta give way You gotta wear the special socks They used to be The coolest thing in the world When I was a kid There was a

There was a girl At my primary school Her mum worked At Lollipops Playland And we were like oh my god, like what a celebrity. So did she get to go there after school every day? Yeah. Scanning, no

bracelet. Yeah, no bracelet. Yeah. Oh my god that was so much fun. And then I went there when I was a teenager for my best friend's little sister's birthday and I was like, this place is gross. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well I mean if you're an adult who's been there with your and I was like, this place is gross. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, if you're an adult who's been there with your children

you're like, nah. Well, because it's full of snotty gross little kids. And it's everything, over the last 12 months, it's everything we've been told not to do. Like, no social distancing, no licking balls. Don't lick the balls. Jacinda was very clear on that one.

No licking the balls. They said that at most press conferences through level 4 lockdown, don't they balls. Don't lick the balls. Jacinda was very clear on that one. No licking the balls. They said that at most press conferences through level four lockdown, don't they? If you're in a ball pit, don't lick the balls. Don't lick the balls, yeah. People are pooing up a storm in those pockets. There might be a little bit of a wee somewhere in this. Little bit of a wee. There's dribble, there's snot, there's...

Because how much would they even clean though? I mean, they'd clean them obviously. Yeah, but you're not Going to go at the end Of every day Full of snotty kids You're not going to Pick up each ball

And be like No way Well there's one In the UK That's planning An adults night They're going to do Every Friday

From 8 till 10 There's a bar there There's a bar there Normally by the way Because some parents Need a drink To stand the noise Because it's a small

Is there? Yeah yeah I think you can get a couple of beers I reckon a couple of RTDs from the fridge Yeah There's a couple of smirn off ice

Yeah Do you reckon there'll be the same amount of vomit in that ball pit as it usually is with kids If there's a spinny thing

they might be able to If people get tangled up because I've been in there when the girls were little and they'd go in Yep They'd get to a point and they're like,

Dad, I can't give us this part. So you'd climb through. They're not made for a six-foot-two man. I'll tell you what's hard is a foam pad. That one that we went to at Jump or whatever, you get stuck in a foam pad. Oh, my God. It's like quicksand.

Because kids can just like Jesus across the top of it. I know. You're like. Like that horse in Never Ending Story. Oh, yes. A tree! And it's just like... Down into the foam.

Again, I feel that would be pretty gross as well, even as an adult, even if you're a little drunk. I don't know if drinking and these kind of things go hand in hand. I went to a party the end of last year, and I turned up and there was one of those inflatable gladiator pits. Oh, yeah. You know, and you get the little,

it was all blown up and you had these two sort of bits that you walk out in the middle and you fight with the little stick. It was a giant Q-tip thing. What kind of party was this? It was a rap party. Right.

For a rapper? No, for like wrapping a shoot on someone. Oh, right. Okay, right, okay, right Yeah, and I was not expecting that I turned up and was already a few down And then I was like, there's a wrestling pit Because I feel like, was it a year or two ago

That ball pits and bars became a bit of a thing Because of Instagram Right There were bars that were doing them I think mostly overseas And you know, you could go in a ball pit No And get a photo See, I'd like that Oh right, a clean But at a them, I think mostly overseas. And, you know, you could go in a ball pit. No. And get a photo.

See, I'd like that. Oh, right. A clean. But at a bar, I don't know, would it be clean for long? No. They'd have to be hosed down at the end of each shift. What if people are in there doing the dirty as well? Just hop in the ball pit.

Waist down. No one can see. On your hop. Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. Well, our very own Hayley Sproul and Vaughan Smith on Have You Been Paying Attention. Did you all left out?

TVNZ. No, I'm all good. I'm good. But it's on tonight. And this is the issue. The same time as the interview. The Harry and Megan interview. We can't deny it.

I'm just saying. The nation has a choice tonight Of their television watching Do they want to watch this Long anticipated Juggernaut Bombshell thought Interview with Harry and Meghan With Oprah

Or Some delicious light comedy With New Zealand's favourite comedians You're not going to see boobs on Harry and Meghan We've got boobs tonight We've got boobs Actually We've got Exposed breasts We've got boobs. Actually?

We've got. Exposed breasts. It was International Women's Day yesterday. So when we were filming. Correct. Okay. Yeah, so all the men got their boobs out. Right.

You just record. You just get on the internet, watch the interview today, and then you can watch our show tonight. So if you want to catch that, it's 8.30, TVNZ2. And if you want to be a part of the live studio audience, which films on Mondays, Monday evenings, you can text Hayley to 9696. We'll find you back a link so you can be in the studio.

We'll give you a little snack. We'll give you a little drink. Yeah. And you can always catch it online if you do watch that. No, watch it on network television. Tonight, you've been told. Tonight. Google has narked on us. What? Google has narked on television. Tonight, you've been told. Tonight. Google has narked on us. What?

Google has narked on us. So, you know. Who's that? Because, you know, when you're like Amazon, you're like Jeff Bezos. Or Facebook, you're like Mark Zuckerberg. Bill Gates. Who are the Google dudes? Larry?

Larry someone? I feel like there's a Larry. Lazar. Are you Googling? The CEO of Google is Sundar Pichai. Right. But the guys that started it wasn't there. Oh, well.

Yeah. Larry Page. Yeah, there you go. Bloody Larry. Bloody Larry. Isn't there some Google guy that's got a super yacht in New Zealand at the moment and it's got a helicopter on the back of it? Oh, must be nice. I don't know.

Isn't that what you say when someone's done really well for themselves? Yeah. Oh, must be nice. Well, Google phones are always on. You click okay, I'll allow Google to follow me around on the phone. Any Google app, like Maps or anything, right? But, I mean, that's the thing. You say yes and you don't mind because how great is Google traffic?

The Maps. It's fantastic. Live traffic's great. It saves you so much time. Well, they have compared the August level three lockdown last year to this level three lockdown that we've just had. Now, they have found that we have not been as good this time around. So compared to August, there was a 47% workplace. Well, this to August, there was a 47%

workplace, well there was a, this time around there was a 47% drop in workplace visits by people. That is compared to only a 51% drop in August. So more of us were going to work. I also think a lot of workplaces worked out how

to continue working. That's true. Yeah, there's a lot more we're a bit more prepared this time out how to continue working at level three. Yeah, there's a lot more. We're a bit more prepared this time with what we can and can't do. I did see more hospitality, like cafes and stuff, doing door service. So like contactless door service. They were encouraged, and I will say I notice this a lot. They were encouraged if you were going to work, like construction sites in particular,

that you can go, but you should be masked up and maintain your social distancing. Yeah, totally. And every site, construction site that I went past, they were practically making out. Yeah. I saw a couple where they were. They were kissing. They were kissing on the scaffolding, weren't they? I was like, man, that's a big highlight

of yellow vest. I was like, that's too highlight of yellow vest. So I don, that's too highlighted yellow vest. So I don't know how, yeah, we got away with it all to be fair. Big claims rocking the construction industry there, Hayley. Well, they're not allowed to can't clean anymore. They have to let out their horny somehow. Yeah, they do. By kissing each other.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, fair enough. And sitting on the concrete mixer. It's like the construction site version of the dryer. Sitting on the concrete mixer. Or the big one on the back of the truck. Or the little one. You can get on top of it. Just sitting astride.

Okay. So Google also found that there was a 23% increase of people staying at home as opposed to not being at home compared to the August last year increase of 28%. Okay, so that's not too bad. But still, that's quite a big drop. Shops and retail. Shops, retail and recreation.

There was a 49% decrease this time of people going to shops, recreational areas compared to 57% in August. What caused the August cluster again? What was the August cluster again? What was the August lockdown? Which one was that?

Last year. Yeah, this was all related to the Valentine's Day cluster, right? Wasn't it the cool store? Yeah, I thought it was the shipping thing. Oh, that's right. That was the rumour one, right? The rumour. Remember there was the nasty rumour going around about how it got.

Yeah. And it was a bigger outbreak as well. And the churches wouldn't listen. And they'd go to a church and the church would not go to church. They should do Google on the churches. Yeah. That would be interesting. Well, I mean, I decided not to go to church last week.

So I did listen there and stayed home. But everyone was like, how was your lockdown? Oh, Auckland lockdown. I was like, busiest week of my year. Well, you were getting up at four o'clock in the morning. I've been left, right and centre. I've been everywhere. And then I tried to think about the size of my bubble and it just blew my mind.

Super spreader sprout. That's what they call you. It's because you're working construction after you finish here. And you kiss everyone. Well, of course. And you kiss everyone. I do. I just pop in, see the lads. The top six is next.

Mike Hosking needs a gap filled on Monday morning. The Prime Minister is like, I'm not coming in every Monday. And he's like, it's very mean. I've got the top six ideas to fill that hole. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. From the ZM clickbait room, this is the top six. Hello there, welcome to the top six.

Mike Hosking yesterday found out that the Prime Minister won't be making the weekly appearance on the Mike Hosking radio program. She's like, I think she said, well, I'll just go on when issues arise. Yeah. And I was like, well, I wouldn't want to start the week. What a rough start to the week. Oh, it'd be horrible. You've not done anything right. But what about that?

But no, that's not enough. What about the fact we've got too many vaccines? Too many vaccines. That's your problem? Oh, and not enough. It's such a, he's such a flip flopper. Well, yeah, there was an article Jose from the spin-off

watched three months of Mike's Minutes in a row and kind of pointed out how quickly opinions can be completely 180'd. Oh, that was so good. It was very, very well put together. I know, like, would you watch that and think, oh, yeah. But he knows what he's doing. He's just got to rile people up.

It's the easiest thing in the world. He's a provocateur. He just gets his little finger and he goes pfft, pokes it into everything. It's like the Easter eggs, because it's almost Easter, and the tinfoil in a box

and he's the little kid that goes along and goes pfft, and pokes this hole and then you're like, well I'm not wearing that one. It's got a finger hole in it. He's the guy at the supermarket going into the avocado pit and just being like, squeeze. Squeeze. It's your fault for being soft avocado. Yeah, too soft, too hard.

Yeah, I was a soft avocado, but look at me now. Now I'm ripe ass. I'm ripe and I'm hard. So I've got the top six things to fill the Prime Minister's size hole on the Mark Hosking Radio Show. Because I don't know if you guys know, but we work in radio. So we've got a few ideas. We know a thing or two.

We've got a few ideas floating around up here. I will point out again, she hasn't cancelled our slot. Our monthly Wednesday. Our monthly Wednesday slot. So no big deal. Because she knows this is where the cool kids are. She knows what's there. Number six on the list

of the ways to fill the Prime Minister's gap on the Hosking radio program. Number six, rather than talking to the Prime Minister, what about talking to a mine prisoner? Someone who's been kept prisoner in a mine. Never start with your best idea. We're

easing into it. Mine prisoner. There's so many of those to choose from. I know, well old mines make great We're easing into it Yeah, yeah, yeah Push into it Mine prisoner Push into it There's so many of those to choose from I know, well old mines make great prisons Number five on the list of the top six ideas For the Mike Hosking radio show

To fill the Prime Minister's Monday hole Husking with Hosking How long will it take Mike Hosking To husk a coconut? Okay. Only using the most basic of tools. Okay. You see them in the Pacific Islands

when you go on a little tourism jaunt. Yeah. You're shown how to husk a coconut. Yeah. Sometimes just a bit of rebar, just a steel thing. Crack, push, crack, push, crack, push. Monkeys can do it.

Surely the hosk will be able to. I'll tune in for that. Number four on the list of the top six ways to fill the Prime Minister interview hole on the Mike Hosking radio show. Stop saying hole like that. Mike's fashion choices. Now there's something I'm tuning in to. He loves a loafer. He loves a Gucci loafer, doesn't he? He loves a Gucci loafer.'m tuning into. He loves a loafer.

He loves a Gucci loafer, doesn't he? He loves a Gucci loafer. Maybe it's the goat fur Gucci loafer with the goat hair on top. Maybe he can give us a distress your own jeans tutorial. The $1,000 ripped jeans with paint on them. Or the blazer made from the thoughts and the prayers of the right wing. Who knows what he's got in the wardrobe this week. No doubt it's ghastly and no doubt he paid a fortune for it.

It's Mike's fashion choices. I like this. Number three on the list of the top six ways to fill that gap left by the Prime Minister saying no on a Monday morning to the Mike Hoskin Radio Show. Mike's car cleaning tips. He runs a tight ship when it comes to cleaning the Maserati. Yeah, because he famously was vacuuming his car, wasn't he, that time?

Yeah. If you're not familiar with this, a new gossipy New Zealand gossip site launched in their lead store as Mike Hosking vacuums car. And everyone was like, oh, this is why this doesn't work in New Zealand. No one does anything. Oh, vacuuming, eh? was like, oh, this is why this doesn't work in New Zealand. No one does anything. Oh, vacuuming, eh?

What next, Rachel Glucena? And that's a great question. No one knows. Number two on the list of the top six things to fill the prime ministerial size hole on the Mark Hosking Radio Show, Judith's characters. Judith Collins rings in and puts on, she like, plays a character. Oh yeah.

She could be like a farmer who's sick of the greens. Yeah. She could be like a worker who's sick of unions. Yeah. She tries to undermine the political left by playing someone from the political left who's had enough of the political left. Is Judith known for her character work? I think,

I always thought the secret to good character voices is having a deep voice to start with. Right. Because you can go high and it sounds natural, but you can't, when you've got a higher register, go low and it makes it sound very natural. So I think impressions. I'd love to see Judith doing some impressions.

Okay. Judith, if you're listening, call up and try to get us with one of your characters. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, no, it's Timothy from Christchurch. Hello, Timothy. How are you? Well, I've had enough of bloody Jacinda Ardern. I'm a hard-working factory worker,

and I don't feel I'm getting anything out of this labour government. Oh, Judith, it's you, isn't it? Oh, you got me, guys. You got me. You got me. You got me. You got me. And number one on the list of the top six things to fill the pro-ministerial size hole in the Mark Hosking radio show on a Monday morning.

Bit of punching down. Bit of punching down. Yeah, okay. Bit of punching down. You know, you can say things like, well, I grew up in a state house. And then you start punching down on people who are in state houses. It's classic. It works for 90% of the show.

I don't know why you can't feel the other 10% of it. Yeah. A little bit more. A bit more punching down. That's today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. I wonder what the world's biggest airports are like at the moment.

Your Changi Airport in Singapore. Yeah. Which is an absolute monster. I think last year they shut down some of the terminals because they just weren't using them. Yeah. It's like U-shaped. It would be a great venue for a wedding.

You know what I mean? Empty. A lot of space. Yeah. Travelators. Yeah. Water and electricity and, you know, power. Changi's super photogenic too.

It's got mini gardens and doors. Yeah. Changi's nice. And then LAX, which is horrible. Oh, that's, yeah. Dingy but mini gardens and doors. Yeah, Changi's nice. And then LAX which is horrible. Dingy but massive. And Dubai, another one. Lots of New Zealanders who came back from the UK transited

through Dubai and they said it was quiet and eerie. I've seen your friends came back from Melbourne the other week and their story was like Melbourne International Airport was deserted. Right. It was weird to see.

Well, it's Dubai. They're going to be trying something new when international travel does start again, and it's the iris scanning instead of a passport. If you're registered with them, you can walk in and it'll scan the iris. Because, you know, we can do the face scan at the moment. Yep. Which is really no different, right? It's biometric info.

Yeah. And so they're going to be able to do the iris scan and they reckon it's just going to hurry everything up. The queues will be minimal. It's going to fly through. I just worry that I've got a doppelganger that's, you know, a drug lord or something. I worry about that I've got a doppelganger That's you know a drug lord Or something you know

Like do you worry about Yeah I'm always like You know they say because you do Everyone has a twin A doppelganger Yeah In the world

They're like everyone has someone That looks almost exactly like you I watched a show where they paired people up That were not related at all And they looked like twins It was so weird What show is that? It was one of those like British documentaries

Oh wow okay It was so good Because have you ever in public Have you ever seen someone that looks like real What show is that? It was one of those British documentaries. Oh, wow. It was so good. Have you ever seen someone that looks real, quite similar to you? Do you know what? It's weird, eh? Do you know, okay, this is a bit far-fetched, but you know the game Catan? Settlers of Catan.

Settlers of Catan that everyone loves. I have not played it, but I desperately want to. It sounds like a lot of fun. What's the gist of that game? Buying and trading and building up the strongest village. Yeah, kind of. Monopoly with villagers. I'll say I don't play it a lot because I'm very competitive. Okay.

But there's a painting on the box of one of the settlers of Catan. And it's this woman. And she's in like an old ye olde frock farmer. She's holding a bloody shepherd's hook. And then she turns to the side and it's my face. Really? Right. It's my face.

So that is my twin. Who have that spaced on? And then, you know, shutter stock. Yep. There is a woman on there that I looked at these photos. A stock image. A stock image. And they're like, have you seen this woman?

And I was like, I don't remember doing that photo shoot. It was like that. It looks like you that much. What is happening here? It freaked me out. Okay, see, if that person went through Dubai. With something up there. And had the same eyes and face.

She's got my face. Yeah. I'm in trouble. You know, an unsavory person. Yeah. How do they Distinguish Or I guess There's enough

With the face And the eyes But then it could work In your favour Because I don't see it And I certainly Don't think it But I'm getting a lot

At the moment Because the cricket's Being played Kane Williamson I think it's just Because he's got a beard Anyone with a beard And we've both got

Beady eyes Beady dead eyes Beady dead eyes He's got dead eyes Because he's trying He's playing sports He's trying to psych Everybody out I've got dead eyes Because Beady dead eyes. He's got dead eyes because he's playing sports. He's trying to psych everybody out. I've got dead eyes because I'm dead inside.

Yeah. I'm a husk of a man. And I've been getting, so maybe if I went to Dubai and I was like, oh, Kane Williamson, I might get treated better. Yeah, and people would follow you around wanting an upgrade. Yeah, and they'd be like, so am I a cricket bat? And I'd be like, of course. And I'd write Kane Williamson on it.

Okay. I'll write it in full in handwriting just so they really knew it was me, Kane Williamson. Leading royal commentators, which is a weird job to choose, isn't it? I'm going to make commentary about just the royal family. They're very traditional. They're very traditional. Well, they're all about it

because if you lose the tradition, you lose the royal family. And if they lose the royal family, they lose their cushy job where they're always asked on their opinions. Exactly. And they're the ones that are always quoted in tabloid newspapers.

I think we talked to one before the royal wedding. Right. Which wasn't actually the wedding, was it? Because they got married three days before. More on that later. But they come under fire. Four of the leading royal commentators are under fire. They were filmed giving an interview, giving their point of view

and their take on the Harry and Meghan interview with Oprah before they'd seen it. So this was organised. This is brilliant. And just goes to prove that you can't believe everything you see. I know. It's just, and the way, honestly, the way they sell it, you're like, oh, I believe that.

But this was organised by YouTube pranksters, Josh Peters and Archie Manners, and they're known for setting up these really elaborate pranks. Are they the two that took Katie, you know that Katie Hopkins? Oh. They flew to some Eastern European country before COVID and received an award that the initials of the award

spelt a very bad word that starts with C. Oh, really? Right. That is brilliant. Well, on this, they interviewed them. They had them all on their little Zoom call. These two were interviewing them, asking for their opinion on something they'd never seen before.

And I tell you what, they did a good job of selling the idea that they know what they're talking about. So now that we know what has been said in the interview, do you think this is going to play well or badly for Harry and Meghan? There wasn't a real need to go into so much detail as to why they were unhappy as members of the royal family impression of the interview i think that this was an extremely hard-hitting interview to my mind this was an actress giving one of her great performances megan was acting so having seen the interview, what do you think it said about Meghan's relationship with the Queen?

I think what it said is Meghan's relationship with the Royal Household was not very good. The interview told us that Harry and Meghan both greatly admire the Queen, but not the institution. If we could speak to the words that Megan used in the interview to describe Prince William and the brotherly rift, what did you make of that part of the interview? In describing the brotherly rift, as they did in the interview, you can't help but be incredibly moved, stunned, saddened by all of it. Just general...

Super broad... Just general broad super broad, just like they're running horoscopes. Yeah. Oh, it was moving, scary, frightening, exciting. Wow. I mean, they're not wrong, having seen some of the clips. No, it's an absolute bombshell interview.

Oh, I know, but yeah, they've missed all that because they haven't seen it at this point. Then these YouTube pranksters wanted to see how far they could push it. I mean, I would have gone absolutely absurd. But what they did, they asked about, they were saying, what do you think about Megan's support for the

Bellum donkey sanctuary? And they went on about that for a little bit. And then they said, how do you guys feel about the fact that Megan is refusing to get the vaccine? Now, if anyone knows, you know, is a royal court. She's for it.

Yeah, they would know that. And they just didn't blink an eye. They were like, yep, I'm just pretending like I've seen that and I know that information. And they just gave their opinion on it. It's so good. It's a good watch. I love this.

All right. ZM's Fletch, Vaughn and Megan, the podcast. ZM's $50,000 secret sound. ZM's $50,000 secret sound. It's thanks to Star streaming now on Disney+, including more originals like Solar Opposites. You can learn more at DisneyPlus.com. Soundkeeper Owls is in.

And we welcome to the show Jodie. Good morning, Jodie. Good morning. All right, so this is a sound that is collectively doing the nation's head in. Yes, you're welcome. Jodie, for $30,000, what is the secret sound? I think it is the lock screen button sound on your mobile. Which mobile?

iPhone? Yeah, specifics, please. Ooh, that's a hard one. I'm going to go Samsung. I'll try and play mine. Okay. Oh, no, that was like, it's like more of a clickety. Clickety clack.

Did you hear that? It's more of a clack. Have another little listen. I see where you're going with this. There's definitely something sort of metallic-y to me. That's just. See, that's an audio noise. This is.

That's a sound effect. Whereas I think... Yeah, that's just a light click, isn't it? It's very light. What is... Yeah, okay. Okay, let's see. Hey, well, I'll tell you now.

Jodie. For $30,000. Is that the secret sound? No, that's not the secret sound, man. Jodie, though, we've got $100 for you. You either get $100 or you get the jackpot, and in your case, $100. Well, there's a lot of debate in the UK at the moment,

and as a country, they've actually vaccinated quite a bit of their population, haven't they? Yeah. With the same vaccine that the government just announced yesterday that we're sticking with, the Pfizer vaccine. We're getting the Pfizer. That's a good one, isn't it? Yeah, everyone's raving about the Pfizer. We should have trusted them from day one. Stiffy pills and vaccines.

They make Viagra, don't they? And their graph is gone. So the UK and Israel have vaccinated a lot of their population and real-time data is showing like, was it 93%, 95%? What do they say? Efficacy. Effectiveness. Effectiveness.

Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Effectiveness. Effectiveness. Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. Ecstasy. You don't need to be able to speak to do this job. You don't know.

Efficacy. Efficacy. Efficacy. So after two shots of vaccination with the Pfizer, yeah, they reckon 93% to 95%. So that's fantastic. That's such good news. And I think the science is still out on the,

if you can transmit the virus when you are vaccinated, but it looks like maybe not. All right. Which, fingers crossed, is the case. If you have the vaccine and the virus comes into you, you won't get sick. But you could possibly pass it on. But if it's inside you and not affecting you, and you are with someone who hasn't had the vaccine, they're working out whether or not they still might get sick. But you could possibly pass it on. But if it's inside you and not affecting you,

and you are with someone who hasn't had the vaccine, they're working out whether or not they still might get sick. Yeah, so they're still working through that, if that's the case. That's why you need to get vaccinated. Everyone just needs to get vaccinated. Exactly. So if everybody, yeah. But here's where the argument is in the UK at the moment,

because obviously summer's coming up and festivals want to go ahead. And I think Glastonbury, they're not happening this year. They cancelled, didn't they? Yeah, second year in a row they've cancelled. Which is crazy. But responsible. Yes, there are still festivals that want to go ahead

and they are saying that if people want to come to these festivals, and this is the argument that they're having between the government and people, is should you have to prove that you've had the vaccine to go to the festival? Well, you've got to prove your dog's had the kennel cough vaccine to go to a kennelry.

Same with cats. And you've got a little passport. Yep. And when they give them the injection or shoot it up their nose, they put the sticker in the book and they put the date and when it needs it, it's booster. Well, it's no different to Australia. If you go to some South American countries,

you've got to show that you've got a yellow fever vaccination. Yeah. It's no different than that. It's not a new concept. But to go to a festival, like how are you going to have an app for that? And then what if people don't believe in vaccines

and they really like the festival? They can't go? They can't go to the festival. Wow. I don't know. Hey, I'm pro-vaccine. Don't get me wrong. I'm just taking the angle of all people here.

Yes. I don't know. I feel like the majority of people will get it. That's fair to say, isn't it? The majority of people wouldn't be anti-vax. I think they said, what, 25% of New Zealanders are waiting to see? Waiting to see what? The effects of people wouldn't be anti-vax. I think they said, what, 25% of New Zealanders are waiting to see? Waiting to see what? The effects of it?

Waiting to see if people blow up and turn purple. Oh, my God. Hasn't happened to any of the people that have got it so far. No reports of purple inflation. Or someone I've seen that said, are you going to turn into Violet Beauregard? Beauregard, yeah. Yeah, the Prime Minister has actually answered that question in a live Q&A. We know how to waste that woman's time.

Don't we? No wonder she's pulling out of Mike Hosking radio interviews. She's sick of all the... She's got to deal with questions regarding Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's Audio Ninja Warrior. Well, it's just like Ninja Warrior,

except you don't need upper body strength or big muscles. And you don't win a prize. Okay, well, I would... So despite what? Your prize is pride. I need to apologise, probably mostly to our competitors, Jared and Vicky, because I falsely... Wrong. And I don't want to end up on fair go.

No, I think you should have to call her up. Pippa Wetzel will bloody go to town on me. Oh. We don't have a hundred... You would be lucky if Pippa Wetzel will bloody go to town on me. You would be lucky if Pippa Wetzel went to town on you. We don't have $100 cash prize. We're playing just for some prize that I've been told is in the group chat that I don't have. Give them a dollar is what's in the group chat. You should give them $1 cash.

Okay, we're in a recession or something. I think Fletch personally should have to come up with that dollar as well. Agreed? Agreed. Good morning, Jared. Hey, how's it going? Good, mate. Playing for Pride this morning at Audio Ninja Warrior. You've got to

be the first to get through our Audio Ninja Warrior course the fastest. Now, Vaughn, you've got the timer standing by yeah and jared we will be reading out these sound effects you've then got to give it to us as quickly as you can uh we may pause if it's not to our liking and ask you to redo all right jared are you ready yeah all right let's go A zip. A what, sorry? A zip.

Good. Driving your car over the rumble lines. Yeah, that was really good. A tight, fast turn on some squeaky concrete. Yes! Yeah, yeah, that'll do. It was very fast. A PA announcement at a supermarket.

Excuse me? No, that was it. No, it's got to be a functioning PA announcement at a supermarket. Can we please have a super positive shout now, please? Yeah! Good! The intonation was perfect. Mating tortoise.

I don't even know what that is. A tortoise.ating tortoise. I don't even know what that is. A tortoise. A tortoise. I can't even do that one. Well, just how you think it would go. How do you think they hump? They hump. They mate. Yes! And an explosion. Yes!

You've done it! Alright, congratulations, Jared, making it through all the way through the Audio Ninja Warrior Explosion. Yes. You've done it. All right. Congratulations, Jared, making it through, all the way through the Audio Ninja Warrior course. We're logging your time. A couple of hesitations there. Yeah. I will argue that tortoise, they're more breathy.

They're a breathier lovemaker. But, you know, maybe they do squeal. Yeah. And I just haven't been around for that kind of lovemaking. No. All right. Let's welcome Vicky to Audio Ninja Warrior. Good morning, Vicky.

Good morning. Playing for $1 this morning. And the pride, Audio Ninja Warrior. Definitely. A lot of pride on the line. Definitely. All right, Vicky. Stand by.

Your time starts now. A zip. Good. Driving over the rumble lines in your car. Yeah, that's it. Okay.

She's going a bit slower. Tight, fast turning on squeaky concrete. Oh, yeah, wow on squeaky concrete. Squeak. Oh, wow. That's squeaky concrete. A functioning supermarket PA announcement. Good morning.

The store closes in 10 minutes. Good morning. Oh, yes. It's morning and the store is already closing? They're allowed to. Oh, madness. Mating tortoises. Tortoise. Oh, madness. Mating tortoises. Tortoise.

Wow. That turtle is getting it. And an explosion. Yes. I've done it. Sort of a gender reveal level explosion there. Yeah. Yeah, it was a confetti cannon.

Yeah. Well, congratulations, Vicky. You have made it through our Audio Ninja Warrior course, as did Jared, but who did it faster? Jared joins us now from their cone of silence.

Yes, Jared, you did very well. Couple of hesitations, though. May have cost you. And it did cost you, because today's winner of Audio Ninja Warrior is Vicky. Quicker through the course. Congratulations.

Yay. Congratulations, Vicky. The pride is all yours and a dollar as well. Make sure you give us your correct bank account details. We have to give you that dollar. It'll be an automatic transfer. It'll be coming from Fletcher's personal account.

$1 every hour for the rest of your life. Oh, my God, imagine that. That would be a lot of money. Next on the show, producer Jared. He's got a 90s... He messaged a group chat with this stupid request last night and it was just met with a wall of abuse. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

Last night in our work group chat, which is a lot of personal stuff too because, you know. It's nice and active. We're more than workmates. But Jared, producer Jared has messaged, do any of you guys have a CD tower you're looking to get rid of? To which we immediately all piled on, Jared, because it's not 1993. I said you're about 10 years too late.

I think that's when I got rid of the last of my... I think I had a DVD tower, but it was more for, like, games, like PlayStation games. Yeah, right. And it was, like, small and it hid itself away because it's yuck. I had one of those CD towers that was, like, snaky. Like, right. And it was like small and it hid itself away because it's yuck. I had one of those seedy towers that was like snaky. Fancy.

Yuck. That was yuck. And it was a feature of my bedroom. Was there a balance issue? Was there ever a balance issue with those? Oh, I'd knock it over all the time. Those things were not stable. Too tall. Even the standard straight up ground ones were never stable. They were wobbly.

Do you know what lasted a bit longer than CD towers? CD wallets in cars? Okay. Do you still have your CD wallet? I have to admit, so I just got a new car and it's all Bluetooth now. There is no CD slot. But my old car was a 2005 car, so it was a six disc, no auxiliary cord sort of thing. So yes, I had old CDs of my dad's because my dad won't throw out his CDs.

Just some classics. Well, your dad is pretty much like producer Jared except way older. Yeah, my dad's 59 years old. Why do you want a CD tower? Like, it's not a trick question. I want to put CDs in it. But why do you want to ugly up your house with CD towers? There is nothing sexier than a fully stocked CD tower.

Do you even have a CD player? Can you buy those? Yeah, I've got a real nice record player slash CD player. Oh, no. See, look. See, I get the gist with records, because they sound beautiful. You put on a vinyl and the crackle and the sound is incredible. It's how music was supposed to be played. It's the same thing

when you open a CD case. No, it's not. That crackle, that... That's the plastic... No. The plastic grippy teeth. I'm talking about the music sound. That says to me, that music's about to sound great. CD cases are the most flimsy, the worst plastic in the world because you'd open it and be like, oh, new CD.

You'd be like, crack. And then the arm thing would slip off. So then you've just got that bottom half of it. You've lost the pamphlet with all the lyrics. What CDs have you got? I've inherited mum and dad's big box of, what would it be, 150, 200 CDs. They've given it up. They got rid of it. That means it's time

to get rid of it. The Salvation Army is waiting, arms open. It's all online. No, I don't want it online. I want a cool shelf or CD rack. I've got a little... Find which one you're after. I didn't put it back in the right case after I listened to it last time.

I put it in another case because that one's in the... Oh, that's the worst. So now I've got to find the case of the one in the CD player because that's probably where this one is. Especially because you have a CD wallet on the go as well. So the discs are in there. The empty CD case is on this. You wanted a pink sink.

What are you talking about? And the nation spoke and they wanted it too. I'm going to be in Home and Garden magazine. I don't think Home and Garden's coming around, Jared, to photograph your CD tower. That's for sure. Well, look, if they wanted to, I've got a new flat. It's very clean.

I've got a neat little music section. You don't want a bar of this. It's not even a retro throwback. The 90s. No, it's. I have a plan. So I've got my record player. I've got my little crate of records.

I've got. See, that's fine. That's cool. And then on the other side of this entertainment unit, I want a nice CD rack. And then next step, cool bookshelf for all my books. See, books tip. So a collection of things.

Look at these CD towers on Trade Me. Oh, hideous. Look at these racks. You know the ones they try to make fancy like solid pine. Yeah, that sounds hot. Look at it. It's an eyesore.

You're an eyesore. Wow. Okay, wellous. It's an eyesore. You're an eyesore. Wow. Wow. Okay, well, we haven't been able to talk about that. And you're also going to need to get a CD cleaner, one of these little separate gadgets. Remember those? Oh, my God, yes.

And you'd squirt a bit of that CD cleaning fluid on it, and then you'd be like, azz. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Jeff Bezos, he founded Amazon. And he's a very, very, very, very, very wealthy man. He, along with Elon Musk, kind of depending on how their stock portfolio is going on shares, are kind of jumping between who's the richest man in the world. That is correct, yeah.

Beautiful game of tennis. Mackenzie Scott is Jeff Bezos' now ex-wife. Yes. And she divorced Jeff, got a whole lot of tennis. Mackenzie Scott is Jeff Bezos' now ex-wife. Yes. And she divorced Jeff, got a whole lot of cash. She's given away half of her money. Yeah, she's given away so much money. To what? Charity.

Charity. She does a lot of charity work. But even still, because I think it was one of the richest divorces in history, right? Yeah, didn't it instantly make her the richest woman? I believe so. She's one of the richest divorces in history, right? Yes. Yeah, didn't it instantly make her the richest woman? I believe so. She's one of, yeah. Yeah. She, yeah, one of the richest women in the world.

Yeah. She has married again. Lucky boy. How long's it been, though? I feel like it's been a couple of years. Yeah. But then that's quick. Especially when you're

one of the richest women in the world because wouldn't you instantly think anyone just wanted your money? How do you go dating her and how do you just keep it balanced?

Like if you went out, even if, is this a high-flying society man who she's married? It's, he's a teacher and apparently

he was a teacher at her kid's school. Oh! So what, she met him like after school or a parent-teacher. Parent-teacher interviews. Jeff was probably busy. Yep. Running the company.

So, do you know what I mean? Like, because if they go out and they have a little flirt across the school yard and then they have a little date, at the end of the date, who's paying? The richest woman in the world? Or the teacher. Or the hot teacher. Yeah. Hot teacher.

Although I'm imagining he was a teacher at a private school because I'm imagining if you're the richest woman in the world, you're not going to... He probably wasn't going to a public school. Yeah, no. But I think even private school teachers are not making as much as the divorcee of... No.

...Jeff Bezos. Yeah. He was a science teacher at a private school, yeah. Okay, right. Yeah. Science teacher's hot. And now he's married to... They're married.

Okay, yeah. Okay, right. Yeah. And now he's married to... They're married. Okay, wow. They're way different than Jeff Bezos, right? Because he's quite a, like, ruthless man, isn't he? Jeff Bezos is, like, not like a huge dude, height-wise or stature-wise. He's not like a big unit. This guy's a unit. He's a bald brother.

He's got a shaved head, but I think he's not like a big unit this guy's a unit he's a bald brother and he's got one of those he's got well he's got a shaved head but I think he's shaving the head rather than having the inevitably thin hair when it grows longer read the room and he's done fantastically

making that choice but he's got one of those rugby player noses oh okay what's a rugby player nose it's been like head butted or boomfed

or it's been in a lot of scrums you know those if you were gonna draw a cartoon English rugby player. Yeah, right. You draw them with like a thick nose there. Like a kind of an Owen Wilson, like it's been broken a few times. But girthier.

But wildly different to Jeff Bezos. Yeah. And that's what we wanted to talk about this morning. How different is your current partner to your ex? Like, what's... Because you've been with your partner now, Hayley, for what, nine years?

Ten years. Did you have anyone before him that was quite serious? Not a lot of serious relationships before Aaron, but, like, my style, yeah, dramatically changed. So the boys that I... I would say that the boys that I had dated

before I met Aaron when I was 21 years old were usually, like, rock and rollers, skinny jeans. Skinny little skinny dudes. My mum used to call them the great unwashed. Like, you know what I mean? Like, they had that kind of feel about them. Yeah. And then Aaron, like, they'd always be really skinny,

little wiry rock and rollers. And then Aaron is like, man. He's five little wiry rock and rollers and then Aaron is like man he's five six foot five right six foot six six foot six and then Vaughn what about Shada

your wife before you you would have been way different than her like ex yeah because her exes would have been hot

hot to try yeah they were pretty hot what are you saying you're a minger what I am a minger. I am a minger.

Thank you for that. No, no, no, no, no, no. Please don't apologise. I thought you were going to be like, oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. Don't apologise. I am a minger. You just came up and said, you're a minger. And your wife is really hot. She would have had hot, fit hotties.

Yeah, she had. Didn't she, like, go with a boy racer or something? Oh, should I? And didn't she have a girl racer car when you met her? Yeah, sure. And then you made her sell it and get a Nissan. It was a turbo GSR. Oh, God.

That thing's costing us a fortune in gas. Vastly different than you. Oh, yeah. We're talking about how different your current partner is to your exes. Some of the descriptions of people's current partners, I sure hope they don't work out. They're talking about them. Oh, God.

But some of the messages, I had a type. My exes consisted of A, a Tonga professional cricket player, B, a Zimbabwean personal trainer, and C, an Egyptian electrical engineer. Okay. I'm married to a beautiful, chubby little white boy. Oh. Chubby little white boy.

I'm picturing like a cherub. Like a little bow and arrow. Who bakes and does cross stitch and I love him to bits. Yeah, right. Okay. My ex was a tattooed up drug dealer, a wannabe rapper, someone with a problematic relationship to alcohol,

always broke because always bought all sorts of unnecessary bullshit. Absolute bad boy. My current partner, no tattoos, never done drugs, highly intelligent, super tight ass with money.

In fact, at the weekend, he wouldn't even buy an $8 sprinkler because the hose he's got does a fine job. Completely different people. Oh, wow. Well, there's a reason that exes are exes, right? They don't work. Yeah, exactly. MC, how are you different from your ex? How is your ex different from your current partner?

I think my ex-boyfriend, well, he was 14 years older than me. Currently, my age gap between my current partner is four years, so it's a bit different. Okay. But my ex-partner was probably not from a physical perspective, but he was just quite, I guess, lazy. Okay. After six months of dating, he would always leave his shit lying around. Never done a wash in his life. Never washed his dishes. It came to this point where he actually quit his job without telling me.

And then I would come home and he'd be playing video games all day and he hadn't had a shower. And I was just like, no, no, no. He's meant to be the sugar daddy, not you. Yeah, exactly right. Brilliant. Brilliant. MC, thanks for your call. Jess, how's your current partner different than your ex? I met when I was 20 on my OA.

I fell in love with a French hippie who wore harem pants, paper cane drums, picked apples for a living when he needed money and didn't believe in capitalism and consumerism. Okay, another time. We got married three months later. Oh, okay. And it ended catastrophically about six months after that. I love this. Catastrophically?

It wasn't like it ended, it didn't end great. It ended catastrophically. So how different is your partner now compared to the French hippie? Well, I ended up a single mum on my own at 22. And when my baby was two, I met and fell in love with and married the most stable man I've ever met. With a job and a house and a car. It seems like a low bar.

The lowest bar is in by the French apple picking hippie non-consumerist. The guy had a job and I love him. Nothing's hotter than stability, eh? Normal friends and a family and yeah

and we've been married 10 years. Oh wow. That's amazing. Jess, thanks for your call. Some other text messages on how different your current partner

is to your exes. My current partner is three years older than me. Big nose. Why are you... What does that matter? Big nose. Is he nosy?

Thinning on the top. Oh, yeah. With a well-lived in face. Now, I'll remind you, this is current partner. Yeah, okay. My previous partners have all been hot. And I mean hot toy boys. Been together for five years, though, so something's obviously working.

She can get past this. Well, there you go. It's more than looks, isn't it? It's not just about looks. More than looks. Looks last a moment. Personality is a lifetime. This is a little piece of wisdom, if you guys want that.

Yeah. I've had one successful relationship in my life. Put it on a tea towel. I reckon. Bloody Mahatma Gandhi filling in for Megan. Fantastic. So philosophical. Somebody said, I've only ever dated gingers,

but my current partner has brown hair. What was that? Right. Was that an indication there you just made about when I said the gingers? It's time for The Secret Sound. What was it? ZM's $50,000 secret sound.

And it's all thanks to Star streaming now on Disney+, including more originals like Solar Opposites. Learn more at Disney+.com. $30,000 is the current jackpot. Tegan, good morning. Oh, my God. Hi. Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. I've been trying to get through for so long. Oh, my God. Hi. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I've been trying to get through for so long. Oh, my God, guys. I'm so excited. Are you one of those people that has been texting in and been like, let me through. I 100% know the answer. I know it.

I know it. I do. Okay, well, no pressure. No pressure. But... Oh, my God. If you can tell us what this sound is, $30,000 cash is yours.

Oh, my God. All right, Tegan. Tell me what it is. I think it's the hand on a watch ticking, like the hands on a watch. Okay, because we had winding up a watch yesterday. Yeah. No, I don't. Yeah.

Why are people fixated on the watch? I don't know. I think I've got the clues match up with some of it. Go on then. Dance us through this situation. I think it was Greg, the first one, that's the brand of a watch. Okay.

And then the Titanic one, it means she's holding the heart of the ocean. That's a watch face you can get, heart of the ocean face. And they also weren't watching for icebergs. They weren't. Yeah, that does. That does.

Yeah. And the proposal at that time, he looked at his watch at the time. Okay. And that's what I can think of at the moment. So you're saying that if that was an up-close listen... Super amplified. Like a big zoom.

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Good bet. I can take you out of your misery right now. Oh, God. Oh, okay. It's not the secret sound.

I'm so sorry. Oh, but I 100%... Yay! Oh, no. Okay, well, Tegan, you don't totally miss out $100 for a wrong guess. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

The interview last night, of course, was in America with Megha Markle, Harry what's his last name? Windsor? Harry Prince? Harry. Is it Windsor? I think it might be Windsor is it Windsor? I think it might be Windsor

yeah Mount Windsor Baton Baton Windsor something like that yeah too many with Oprah and there were some

big bombshells as promised in the trailer but they often don't deliver these things they say oh there's gonna be bombshells and then there's not there were

you'd be from what we've heard I haven't seen the whole thing but we've watched a lot of clips this morning, there would not be a royal interview this revealing ever. No, we've never even, and this was one of the things, it's not a bombshell so it's not part of my list

but this is one of the things that Harry spoke about was that at least they're going through this together, this process together, whereas he keeps reflecting on his mum, thinking about Lady Di in the middle of all this, never said a word, you know, like was never, well, not never said a word, but never supported it,

you know, never did anything like this. So we've never had an insight into the royal family like this. What about Fergie? She did an interview with Oprah as well, and she did say some shocking things, but she's not as central to the family. I mean, Prince Harry is, you know, the grandson of the... Yeah, he has direct lineage.

He's the direct lineage of Charles. So this is pretty insightful. Yeah, so screens are on New Zealand TVs tonight. Tonight at 7.30 on 3, it is tonight. But there's a lot online, so you can head on if you just can't wait. But I'm going to give you the five biggest bombshells. Number five, and I will say a bit of a disclaimer. This could be a trigger for some people.

So if conversations regarding mental health are not good for you, feel free to turn me off right now. So number five is Megan suffered really badly with her mental health to the point where she even contemplated suicide. She revealed to Oprah in this interview, she said she went to HR and begged for help and

some support. They've got an HR department? They do. Actually. It's like a business. Well they call it, they keep referring to it as the firm. Several times they call it the firm, which is crazy. Well, she went to HR begging for help with her mental health,

saying that she would stay up all night just totally overwhelmed with the terrible publicity she was getting and the treatment from the royal family and they denied her any help because they said it would be bad for the royal family image. That's bad. Wow, that is bad. That is very very bad.

Number four, the biggest bombshells. Harry and Meghan actually got married three days before the wedding that we saw. This was a bombshell. Yeah, so the big wedding they literally did for the public. She said it was a show. And you know because they couldn't not do that. So they had

the Archbishop marry them in their backyard but there was was her mum there I don't know I don't think so they said they keep saying

in the interview just the three of us just get the paperwork out of the way wow so maybe they've got yeah different sort of rules

I thought maybe they might have done like a family and friends you know five or ten people yeah BBQ and the you know yeah BYO

were you jandals just literally them in their backyard with the Archbishop of Canterbury and them. Do you think that was so that there wasn't pressure? That's a weird one because I didn't think that was that big a deal, but everybody's like really hooked on the fact that what we were watching wasn't just ceremony, but like that's all I found it ever really looked like was pomp and ceremony.

Well, it is about the pomp and ceremony, which we still got. We don't care about them signing the document. But yeah, when we saw them and we saw her come out in that dress and they were in the carriage, they were already husband and wife. Wow. They had us fooled.

Third biggest bombshell, they've been cut off financially. We kind of knew this though, right? Yeah, but the way they go into it was that that was a surprise to him. Yeah, having to pay for security. Pay for everything. And now that they

because obviously she stopped working and they didn't want her to be an actress on a TV show, so they had no money. So now they are living off of the Princess Diana's inheritance that she left Harry. How much would that have been?

I don't know. Well, it's obviously enough. I don't know if the information is there, but he said he feels that she could, that Lady Di has done this because she could foresee something like this happening for them. Okay, so the princes were left about 6.5 million each pounds. Right. Oh, they'll be all right.

That's like 12 million New Zealand dollars. Prince Harry inherited 10 million pounds on his 30th birthday. So that must have gone into some kind of fund or... Right. I mean, that's not a lot really, is it? 10 million pounds? I mean, it's a lot. 20 million New Zealand dollars.

What do you need? You don't know that he hasn't spent half of that already. I know, but gambling, drinking, all sorts. He did that, remember those Vegas parties? Yeah, he did. That was pretty 30, though. Pretty terrible. Number two, they use the interview as a gender reveal.

They are having a baby girl. And then they have said they will have no more children. Snippity snip snip. Right, okay. I don't know. They didn't confirm he'd be snippity snip snip or tubity tube tie. But they are having a little baby girl and she will live in freedom. Titleless, nonetheless.

And of course, number one, the biggest bombshell, which we've been talking about a little bit this morning. You've probably heard it already. Racism. So this was when... Old white English people are racist. That wasn't the bombshell. Sit down, take a seat.

It was how overt it was, not only towards Megan, but towards their son Archie. So the first she found out when she was pregnant that they had decided that he wouldn't receive any of the protection or any of the titles he was entitled to. He would be a prince. Prince Archie was told that. and then was told that there were conversations happening and concerns around how dark Archie's skin would be.

Isn't that crazy? And they've since come out and said that it was neither the Queen nor Prince Philip that said that. Yes, but they didn't say that in the interview. So he didn't go into information, even though Oprah wanted it, but Oprah was interviewed this morning on CBS Good Morning and had this to say. Yes, and he did

not share the identity with me, but he wanted to make sure that I knew, and if I had an opportunity to share it, that it was not his grandmother nor his grandfather that were a part of those conversations. Who said it? It must have been his dad then, Charles, Prince Charles.

Well, this is the thing. And now people are going like, the number is narrowing down on who it could be. We'll find out. So they're going to try to find out who it is because that is an absolutely shocking revelation and something that the royal family would have hoped would be swept under the rug.

Wow. There you go. Bombshells. Bombshells are plenty. And that's only five. Yeah. So many. That was probably in the space of about three minutes all this was revealed.

Can't wait to watch this. No, look, I never try to pretend to be anything that I'm not. I'm aware of my shortcomings and the areas that I could improve on and it turns out grooming is one of them. I've never kept it a secret that I'm a bit of a hairy woman. I wouldn't say you're...

Because I groom. I do like grooming. I've got PCOS and one of the symptoms is you can be a bit hairy. Especially in the facial region. And I had a really busy week last week. Right. Polycystic ovarian syndrome.

Oh, right. I didn't, I thought, okay. I didn't know what that stood for. You were like PCOS. I thought, was it like one of those banks that's not a big bank? Yeah. It's not one of those co-ops like PCOS? I bank with PCOS.

Yeah. Anyway, so I had a busy week last week. We're filming lots of things. And so I spent a lot of time in the makeup chair. And I had a bit of a mishap in the makeup chair. The lovely makeup woman was doing my face and, you know, doing the powder, doing the things, trying to ignore the state of my eyebrows because I was in lockdown. I couldn't get them done.

And then she was sort of brushing, doing the powder on my face and she goes, oh, God, these lemon cheek brushes. One of the hairs is, the hairs keep falling out. And she went to get the bristle off of, you know, the brush that had landed on my face. She pulled it, attached. And your whole face went. She's 100% attached.

And there was just that moment where time slowed and she went, these brushes. And felt the pullback, felt the resistance. Oh, no. And then instantly let it go and was like, oh. And there was no denying what had just happened. Did you speak about it or was that it? You just left it.

Or did she pluck it? I did what I always do, which is like, oh, I just haven't had time. Did she? No, she left it. She left it. I've dealt with it now. Right.

It's these ones on the chin. Ladies, you feel me. It's these ones and they just sort of spring out of nowhere and you can't see them in a lot of light. Right. Are they thin then? No, no, no. They're thick as. You said it was like a makeup brush. Was it like a thick black?

No, it was white. The makeup brush was white. But I guess it was like a blondie. Right, okay. But I'll never forget that feeling of just like yoink and me going ow. That was my face. That was attached to me. My lady ow. Oh, that was my face. That was attached to me.

My lady beard. It's not the first time. I know someone who's had the same thing and makeup artist has been like, oh, you've got a little brush here on your chest. And pulled it and it was attached. So look, no shame. Yeah, wow.

Makeup artist should know now though, right? No, but I think she was surprised by the coarseness. Oh, right. I mean, she did call it a brush here. Yeah. Just that feeling. You know that feeling when you pull a chin here and you're like, ow.

It's not a brush here. That's a hormonal hair. It's in there. It makes you feel better in the lift on the way up yesterday because I always give myself a look in the mirror. I don't really see myself until I get in the lift at work. So only time you look at yourself in the mirror. In the morning, I don't really look in the mirror in the bathroom.

Because it's early and it's bright. Maybe, and it's very confronting. Yeah. And I'm naked and that's embarrassing to see. I'm so embarrassed. I'm so appalled by my own white ass. I avoid mirrors if I'm naked. Don't be embarrassed.

And I saw myself in the lift and then I was like, huh. And I had, I was like getting out the nose hairs. A nose hair. I had a protruding nose hair because I get them waxed, but I'm due for another revisit. But yeah, I had to pluck a couple of those out. Oh, look. And then your eyes, it makes it look like you're crying and I got out of the lift

and someone was there, one of the journalists, they're like, morning. I was like, morning. And because I had tears in my eyes, I'm probably like, shit, that guy really hates work, eh? He's come in, be happy, he's crying in the lift on the way out. Good morning. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan,

the podcast. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Today's fact of the day is happy birthday also. Okay. To Barbie. Oh, I love Barbara. Barbara, weren't you

saying you had a lot of Barbies? I had 52 Barbie dolls. Rich. And I, yeah. And I, no. Yeah, I went to a private school. No, not rich. It was just my only toy of choice. Really? I loved Barbie.

Love Barbie. And I still have them all, but they're in a terrible state. What was in your range of Barbies? I had everything. I had Bride Barbie and Groom Ken. I had Rapunzel Barbie. I had the Spice Girls. They weren't Barbie Barbie.

Did you have all five? I had all five. Were they not official Barbies? I don't think they were, but which one did my dad get me from Australia? I think he got Jerry, and it was a knockoff brand, and it looked like a drag queen, so I loved that one. I had every Barbie.

Like, I just had them all. I loved them. Right, just like a Barbie. Well, it's Barbie's birthday, and I've got some Barbie facts. Barbie was unveiled today, 62 years ago at the World Toy Fair. Wow, and now it's just, well, it'd be one of the biggest toys in the

world. And, um, hold on. Don't you dare. Yeah, it came out at 5am. It's on the New Zealand Herald. Barbie has revealed their third official New Zealand Barbie and it's Karen Walker.

Karen Walker's got her own Barbie. And it's even got the sunglasses like her. The trench coat, the glasses. Yeah, good. Now, apparently that was embargoed. She's younger than Barbie. But? Barbie's 62, Karen Walker's 51.

Right, okay. So she's got a Barbie made in her likeness. Karen Walker is keeping it tight, man. She is cool. Who else have been the New Zealand Barbie role models? Was Dame... Valerie Adams. Yeah.

Valerie Adams was one. And the reporter... Mallory Robertson. Yes. Yes. Was another Barbie. Oh my gosh. This is so cool.

She's got the grey streaks through her hair. The best-selling Barbie doll ever. This is just some Barbie facts before I hit you with the main Barbie fact. The best-selling Barbie doll ever was 1992's Totally Hair Barbie, which featured floor-length hair. Did you have that one? Yes, yes. Did you cut the hair? Did you cut it?

I cut the hair. I cut a lot of my Barbie's hairs because I used to put them in the bath with me, and then every Barbie owner knows the hair never bounces back from that. So then you try to wash it and then that would make it worse because it's synthetic fiber. Yeah. So yeah, you often end up cutting it. I know this from my daughter's Barbies. Their hair goes all like real ratty.

It just goes terrible. It looks like Barbie's been lost in the bush. She's been on her own version of Barbie naked in the frame. Yeah, very much so. Twigs in her hair and stuff. Hey, if my mum's listening, which she will be, can you just go out into the garage and see if they're still in there? They're in that

black leather case. Thank you. What if a rat's got in there and chewed the faces off all your Barbies? Well, the rat better watch his back. That's a new collector's Barbie. Rat face. Rat face Barbie. I was terrible though because I got some collector Barbies and I just played with them. Opened them up. Oh, you meant to

leave them in the box. They could be worth thousands now. Well, I've got that collectible Ken. The one that came out with earrings and matching earrings and he became like this weird, it wasn't intended to be. They were like this is just Ken and he's wearing a mesh singlet and he's got earrings

and he loves to party. And he was adopted by the gay community who were like, finally, adult represent us. And Mattel were like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And they were like, no, too late. And so they pulled them off the shelves. And I've got one. How did you? I read about it.

And you found one and ordered it. And I found it on eBay and I ordered it. And it's still in the packaging. It's in the wardrobe found it on eBay and I ordered it. That's right. And it's still in the packaging. It's in the wardrobe. This is why you are a hero of the gay community. Yeah. Well, I wanted to conserve.

I mean, I can't believe that Barbie thought that we wouldn't think that this character was part of the LGBTQI community. Yeah. It's fantastic work for him. It's a fantastic doll. And they took it off the shelves. Where have you been, Ken? Here's just out with the lads. Yeah. It's fantastic work for him. It's a fantastic doll and they took it off the shelves. Where have you been, Ken? Here's...

Just out with the lads. Yeah. What lads? So this is today's main Barbie fact. Yep. The average since Barbie was released 62 years ago, Barbie has sold 58 million Barbies a year. Whoa.

I've got 52 of them. I went and I gathered all my daughter's Barbies and I weighed them. Yep. Each Barbie weighs 100 grams for a standard Barbie. Now there's smaller Barbies now and there's bigger Barbies now. I weighed one of the smaller Barbies

and she was 75 grams and the bigger Barbies were 125 grams. So that still averages out at 100 grams of Barbie. Yeah. So if you take into account 58 million a year at 100 grams, that's 5,800 tons of Barbies every year. Now, a ton, however you want to measure that, in a small elephant could be a ton.

So that's 5,800. Or 580 Eiffel Towers. The Eiffel Tower is 10 ton. Wow. Which I thought would have been heavier. What you're saying is that Barbie is a huge blight on the world for plastic. It's a lot of plastic. And if you were to collect Barbies and say have 50 odd,

you'd actually be an environmental terrorist. What? That's what you're saying. they have 50-odd, you'd actually be an environmental terrorist. What? That's what you're saying. You've got a lot of carbon locked up in your Barbie. I call Vaughn a minger, and now I'm an environmental terrorist. That's how it goes. Basically, you're both cancelled.

It's not environment, because they're never going into the environment, because I'm keeping them forever. In four years of Barbie sales, there would be enough Barbies produced, they would weigh the same as the Sky Tower. Wow. In four years of Barbie sales, there would be enough Barbies produced, they would weigh the same as the Sky Tower. Wow. In four years.

And it would be bigger because plastic weighs less than the concrete and steel that that's made of. And surely all the Barbies ever made would stretch to the moon and back a few times. Oh, easily. Well, I went as nuts. And for weight of Barbies, should have gone for height. I should have gone some distance of... Is there an astronaut Barbie? Yes, there is.

Oh, okay. Well, that's... Well, it was one of the first Barbies. We'll have to use astronaut Barbies, otherwise they'll suffocate. Yeah, they will. It was based on the first woman that went on the Challenger spacecraft.

Oh, fantastic. I think it was a space shuttle. Good stuff. Feminism. Yeah, it's all go. So happy birthday to Barbie. And today's fact of the day is 58 million Barbies are sold every year.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Megan with Hayley Sproul. Yummy, yummy. Yummy, yummy. A segment of the show where we take a look at new food items and New Zealand's Hayley's mid-eat. We have these in studio. We were anticipating their arrival this morning. There is a new ice cream out.

It's called Pascal Pineapple Lumps. But it's like a bar because you might be like, didn't we have Pineapple Lumps ice cream? I remember it was like... Yeah. Who makes this? Tip Top. Tip Top.

It's a Tip Top. Yeah, it's... Oh, you've dribbled ice cream everywhere. Oh, you've got a melty ice cream. Put it in a cup. I don't have a cup. We need a paper towel. Mine's dribbled and all that's left is the shell.

That's the problem. Yeah, we've got these a little while ago and you guys didn't freeze yours. I've said when the, they just had a pineapple lump collab with Milk Bottle come out recently. And I've never been the hugest pineapple lumps fan. No. And I'm also generally not a fan of artificial fruit flavours in lollies and ice creams. Yeah. Are you guys the same?

Like chocolate's fine, but when it comes to like artificial strawberry or banana or especially pineapple and banana, I just can't do it. I love artificial banana, but I just love banana flavoured anything. I'm not a huge fan of artificial banana. Banana. It's quite tasty. It's not just a frozen pineapple lump, which is

when I have pineapple lumps, they go straight into the freezer. You get them and you snap them off. So it's pineapple lump flavoured ice cream in the middle. The pineapple that's usually the marshmallow-y bit. There's a layer of goo on the top. What's the goo? Caramel? Which is like a chewy pineapple chew.

Oh, okay. Pineapple flavour with jelly layer. So it's a pineapple jelly. So it's a pineapple ice cream, a pineapple jelly coated in dark chocolate. It tastes like, if you like pineapple lumps. You'll love that. Then you'll love this, I think. But if you're like, oh, pineapple lumps, not for me.

It's very strong in the pineapple. Right. So if you're not into artificial pineapple, it might not be for you. No, but I mean, I think if you love pineapple lumps, you absolutely will love this. They're always like one of New Zealand's highest selling lollies, right? Pineapple lumps. And when people go overseas, they miss the pineapple lumps because no one else does it.

I think that's because so many radio shows buy them for visiting celebrities to give them interviews. Would you like some lollies? Is that what we say to them? Yeah, they're from New Zealand. How long do you reckon we have to wait until snifters come back? Forever. I could give it up. Let it go. What about peach fruit bursts?

No, they're not coming back either. How dare they keep orange and get rid of peach? Stop living in the past. You're right, I need to move on. Move on from these. There's no shortage of other highly addictive sugary treats on the market. Started something new last night at our house before the girls addictive sugary treats on the market. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

We started something new last night at our house before the girls go to bed. Ice cream? No, not every night. A silent treatment? Every now and then. But this new, no, we do a quiz. Okay. Sade's Quizmaster, she asks general knowledge quiz questions

to the girls I was very impressed Who built the great pyramids was a question last night August said Jesus And then Indy Really surprised me She was like the Egyptians I was like how do you know that

She's like I don't know They did a good job too And then August said Prove to me Jesus was an Egyptian And I like, I don't know. They did a good job too. And then August said, prove to me Jesus wasn't Egyptian. And I was like, I can't. I can't prove that. That whole thing's a bit light on fact. So she's got you there.

Yeah. It's all good. But we started, August was actually, August is, if you don't know, August is my younger daughter. She's going to turn seven. She's six. This is her seventh year. So she's going to be seven in June. And she was actually ahead

for a good slice of the game. Why brought this on? Because we always watch the chase. Yeah. Always watch the chase. And they're like, you know that round where they just hit them,

the end one, where they're trying to build as many. I always act like I'm part of the team. So I yell the answers. Same, I do that. And then there was a woman on the other night just alone. Alone. She was so useless and she got like five.

Yeah, she was so embarrassing. And I was like, oh, that would be my worst nightmare. And then when the, what are they called? When the chaser did their round to try and get to the same number, there was one pushback at four and the host is like, okay, well, we need these pushbacks. I was like, she's got a minute and a half left. 17 more pushbacks.

In the next 30 seconds. So you think this could be every night? Yeah, building them up for... I think it's really good because my general knowledge is appalling. Mine isn't bad, but it was even like, as a kid, I couldn't sit down and like read a book like a long

story book. Like if Harry Potter had come out when I was a little kid, I couldn't have done it. Have you seen how thick the third one is? Yeah. What's the third one? The Prisoner of Azkaban. They just get thicker and then the sixth one was a monster and then I think the seventh maybe was a little bit smaller, but that would have intimidated

me. I used to like sit down and read like the children's encyclopedia. So you could read like two or three things and be like, interesting. Shut book. I read a book. Good work, Vaughan. Thanks, Mum. I just wonder where I went mentally during history and geography and science.

Yeah. I did well at school, but because I chose mostly creative subjects. But then if you were to ask me the date of something or like where a country is, I'm like, east? Over there somewhere? Here. East of here. Yeah, that way. Yeah, I would just think about it now to liken it to modern.

I could do like the TikTok of school. I could concentrate for 15 seconds as long as I got something out of it. Yeah. I would just think about it now to liken it to modern. I could do like the TikTok of school. I could concentrate for 15 seconds as long as I got something out of it. Yeah. And then I was like, next. No, no, no, no. I can't write an essay on it. Just keep hitting me with ridiculous facts. It's in.

It's in. Yeah. Yeah, that's my education at the moment is just your fact of the day every day. Yeah. I'm done getting smarter. I get messages all the time from people who are like, fact of the day, got me five points at pub quiz tonight. Wow, you're an educator.

I am an educator. You're an educator. When do I start getting paid by the Ministry of Education? Can I get an NZQA thing? Maybe get some unit standards. You might have to go to university for that, I think. No, cannot do that. Busy.

Again, university is longer than a TikTok. Yeah. And I don't want to be the mature student. Yeah, because you would always be asking questions. You would. And then you'd be at the parties like, yo, yo, yo, how's it going down? What up, dudes? What are we doing?

The TikTok dance. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's free and Clinton to listen to? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hit music lives here. ZM.