ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch Vaughan & Megan Podcast - March 6th 2020

Episode Date: March 5, 2020

What did you order drunk?Am I a bad person?Vaughan had a grim day!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Welcome one, welcome all to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast brought to you by Spark. Get four gigs of bonus data on Spark's $49 prepaid value pack. Now, on with the podcast. Hello, good morning, welcome to the show Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Happy Friday. Yay, we made it. I don't want to panic anybody, this could be the last Friday. Why? I don't want to play to the media's strength of late of hyping up this coronavirus. But this could be the last Friday. Why? I don't want to play to the media's strength of hyping up this coronavirus. But this could be the last Friday, yeah.

Enjoy your Fri-yay. Your wine day. What's the wine one? What do you say when you want a wine on Friday? I don't know what you're talking about. Thank God it's wine day. What do people say when they want a wine? It's wine o'clock.

There's a wine saying about Friday. Why are we only having wine on Friday? No, because one of those days where you start drinking and you don't have to stop. What have you got there? You've Googled it? I don't know what you're talking about. TGI wine. I don't agree.

No. I just Googled. Wine saying about Friday. Nothing's coming up. You're absolutely not coming up. You're absolutely right. You're living a lie. Why am I? Nah.

Are you sure? You know what rhymes with Friday? Wine. That might be it. That might be it. That might be it. Yeah, good. That's pretty good.

That's pretty good stuff. Well, maybe we need one. Maybe we need a Friday specific wine. I don't know. T-G-I-F. Froze. Thank God it's Froze. Okay, sure, that works.

Yeah, sure. Now, is it true? No, thank God it's Fries Day Day and it's about eating fries on Friday. Is that what it is? That's not. Look, you don't need an excuse to drink. Pop it and drink it. We have, I believe, had a jackpot for The Secret Sound.

Is this true, Executive Producer Anya? Yep. $75,000. You called her Executive Producer. Intern. No, you said Executive Producer her executive producer. Intern. No, you said executive producer. Intern, executive intern. No.

That's early. I don't recall. Executive producer of interns. Yeah. $75,000. Is that correct? Yep. Okay.

Back to your intern booth. That's too late. That is insane money. So coming up this morning, seven and eight, we'll give you a shot at our secret sound. All thanks to Save My Bacon.

The video, the clues, everything you need is at ZM Online. We'll give you a listen to the sound now. $75,000. The top six is coming up.

Katy Perry's announced her pregnancy. Yes. In a music video for a new song. Yep. I mean, that's a real... Guys, I've got a new song move, isn't it? Isn't it? And now we're all just going to watch it to see the baby bump.

Not even probably listen to the song. You have to. It's right at the end. Okay, well, give me a time marker and I'll skip through it The top six other ways Katy Perry could have announced her pregnancy ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast Alright you lot, listen up, it's story time Story time, three news headlines

Interesting odd quirky news stories Vaughan and Megan must pick one of the three following headlines Headline one Roomba attacker facing 10 years in jail Headline two Northern Territory news to the rescue And headline three Twins identical except the bills

Those are your headlines Twins identical except the bills Is about two duck twins And the only way to tell the ducks apart were slightly different bills. Oh, that was cute. No, it's not that. It's far less cute actually, Megan. Our twins both had cancer but at time of cancer.

One was living in the UK so their cancer treatment was free with the NHS. Yeah. And the other lived in America and it cost them an absolute bloody fortune. Oh my God. Just kind of highlighting the difference between, yeah, state-provided healthcare and nothing. Interesting though. A lot of identical twins, identical cancer.

But then if it's a genetic- Yeah. Crazy, eh? Yeah. Okay, well, you know that story. So do you want Roomba attacker or do you want Northern Territory News to the rescue? Roomba attacker.

Or Northern Territory News to the rescue. That's a Roomba. A vacuum cleaner. Roomba see. Roomba yo. What song's that? Pitbull. I know you want me.

Is that it? What an absolute poet. Rumba Si. So, the rumba one? No. What was that product placement? Was he a rumba ambassador? Yeah, early days.

Right, okay. Well, do you want rumba? Well, that Dyson one of them, but he couldn't say it and make it sound Spanish. Dyson. Hard to, but he couldn't say it and make it sound Spanish. Dyson! Hard to rhyme that in a song. Yeah. So do you want Roomba, story one, or do you want story two, Northern Territory News to the rescue? Northern Territory News to the rescue.

Sounds like a win for the small guy. You want that one? Yeah. That's Australia, right? It is, yes. We go to Australia, and the NT Express, the newspaper there in the Northern Territory. Would it be okay if I played that football song in the background? Would that be alright with everybody?

Yeah, I don't have a problem with it. You might need to plug your laptop in first. Now, why isn't that working? I just want to hear the rumba. See? It's the 305 checking in for the remix. You know they had a 75 Street Brazil. Has Pitbull gone so far past cheesiness, he's got a bit of kitsch? Or not yet?

Yeah, he's there, he's there. Yeah, he's there. Ha! This is very distracting. How long till we get to the rumba bit? Rumba, si. I feel like it should be happening already. I feel like we've missed it.

One, two, three, four. Uno, dos, tres. One, dos, rumba. A rumba. This would be a rumba. Rumba, si. Rumba, co. Right, okay.

You got that out of your system? Okay, good. This would be a great song for Zumba. Itumba. Zumba. Right, okay. You got that out of your system? Okay, good. This would be a great song for Zumba. It would, yes. Because you could say Zumba when they say Roomba, and it's quite like a funky movement song. A funky movement song. We go now to the Northern Territory,

and Australia at the moment gripped with their toilet paper shortage. Oh, yeah. I feel like people here have calmed down a little bit when it comes to the toilet paper. Did you see a economist try to explain why everyone's going nuts Toilet paper shortage. Oh, yeah. I feel like people here have calmed down a little bit when it comes to the toilet paper. Did you see a economist try to explain why everyone's going nuts for the toilet paper? Why toilet paper's running out? It's because people hear all the panic about it

and so they're worried they're going to miss out on just general paper. So they go out and panic buy a bunch of paper. So it's just like a snowball effect of everyone being like, I don't want to miss out. Yes. Well, some people are saying it's the panic

that's worse than the actual virus. Way worse. Way worse. God. Another thing to blame social media for. Well, the Northern Territory News, they have printed a special eight-page lift-out blank with some lines that you can cut as a guide. But it's still newsprint.

Still newsprint. They've got a little... You'll put that down the toilet. That's pretty clever. It's pretty clever. They've got a little logo of Australia, the Australian NT News logo, and they've got some handy lines where you can cut and fold, and you can use those eight pages in the middle of the NT News logo, and they've got some handy lines where you can cut and fold,

and you can use those eight pages in the middle of the NT News as toilet paper. And how long till, like, the local council comes out and says, please don't flush that. Yeah. Not flushable. There's that too, but yeah, pretty funny from them. Good stuff. But yeah, Sydney is crazy at the moment.

Like, seeing friends post supermarkets and I had a friend in Sydney on his Instagram story, there was a guy wearing a full-on gas mask buying toilet paper at the self-serve checkout and he's just like, what is going on? It's crazy. But I saw a headline yesterday being like, Australia's death toll

doubles. But it went from one person to two. And it's like, that is horrible and tragic, but like. People die from the flu all the time. Also like, death toll doubles. It's like, come on, seriously. The hype and stuff at the moment is absolutely insane. Madness.

Just remain calm. I can't find, if you can flush toilet, flush newsprint. Well, once it goes soggy, it's going to unclog the drain, isn't it? Because it does sog up way more than like cartridge or A4 or cartridge. Let's not improvise with cartridge. No, but if you scrunch it up, it still goes into like a clumpy ball. Yeah, that's true. You couldn't use the lift outs, for example, at the Herald

because they're all glossy prints. And they're wiping your ass with Viva all day long. You wouldn't be getting anywhere. Which is incidentally how they write some of those articles. Your words, Vaughan Smith, not mine. He's a company man. Oh my God. ZM's Fletch Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

They didn't win Lotto, but it's like the next best thing. In a little town in Italy, something amazing happened to a bunch of the villagers. In fact, I think it might have been the whole village. Right. They turned on their taps and wine came out. Hello. Wine from a local vineyard. L'Ambrusco Gras Rosa. Yep. As always Lambrusco, Rosa.

Yep. As always, you're Italian, Megan. Flawless. Yeah. Absolutely flawless. So yeah, they turn on the tap and it's like pink wine.

Is it like a rosé? Or just a watered down red? I think it's, I think it's fizzy. So like a sparkling pink. Oh, wow. Okay. Not a champagne. And that's a sparkling pink. Oh, wow. Okay. Not a champagne.

And that's coming out of the cold water tap. Yeah. How does that happen? Everyone was like quickly bottling it after they realised what was happening. But it was a defective silo that was leaking the wine into the local water supply. But wine has a higher pressure than water in the pipes. So it got through the plumbing and into people's houses. So they literally just...

Bottled it up. There's a picture of it. Someone pouring it out of their kitchen tap. And just bottling it up. Bottling it up. But if it was a fizzy wine, would it still be fizzy? Or it wouldn't matter? It's pretty fizzy in this vessel they've got it in.

Right. It seems to be still a bit, probably a little bit flat. But nothing, a bit of SodaStream wouldn't fix it. A couple of pumps, a couple of... Could you just put like a rosé into a SodaStream and make it a sparkling rosé? You know how you drink, like, say you had a fancy bottle of champagne,

you didn't drink it all, and you try and put a spoon in it and that doesn't work. Could you like, yeah, re yeah refizz you mow it how does this is because this is a question because i said yesterday we finally opened the soda stream that we've had for ages yeah how when you go and it pumps the carbon dioxide into the water yeah how does it make the water bubbly rather than the carbon dioxide just going to the top and being like, when you open, I'm out.

And immediately... It'll have something to do with the gas rather than just being air. It's carbon dioxide. Yeah. So it's not just like blowing bubbles in and they just pop up. And disappear.

The carbon dioxide will stay in there for some reason. Because I googled... I don't know the answer. I googled last night, how does a soda stream I googled last night how does a soda stream work and it said you just attach it

and push the button. I was like, no, no, I need more. You need the actual working. I need the actual workings Right. of how carbonating anything works. Because you can't just put anything in

and it'll bubble it because it'll all just spurt out the top. Because I tried to bubble up my homemade kombucha and that was an abscess cleaning. Because that's already fermented, right? Well, yeah, but it wasn't bubbly and I wanted it

bubbly. And I was cleaning kombucha off the entire kitchen and the soda stream. It was a disaster. You looking to me for answers because I'm googling? Yeah, you're googling because you'll just find a how-to by soda stream. You attach the bottle, make sure it's tight, and then pump it.

I found how it works in like a can of soda. So the pressure inside keeps the carbon dioxide dissolved in the liquid. So carbon dioxide must stay dissolved longer than just air. Because if you lift your SodaStream out, lid off, it goes flat. Yeah, pretty quick. So eventually they'll release. They'll all bubble out and disappear. But obviously slower than...

So it's that seal and it forces it down into the water. The pressure. And then because it's got a pressure, it can't just automatically go to the top, so it dissolves into the water a little bit. Yeah. And then that's how the bubbling happens. This is why you should pay attention to science.

Now see, if they had told us this, my ears would have been like, tell me more. But we never learnt anything cool like that. It's all boring stuff, eh? Yeah. I was like, I was paying attention when we got to play with the Bunsen burners. They were fun.

They were lots of fun. And kids, don't take that for granted because once you leave school, I haven't played with a Bunsen burner since. There's no Bunsen burners. I have not seen a Bunsen burner in real life. A camp cooking stove is as close as you come to a Bunsen burner since there's no Bunsen burner. I have not seen a Bunsen burner in real life. A camp cooking stove is as close as you come

to a Bunsen burner but it's not as fun. Because it doesn't have the little spout and you can't control with that tap on the science bench how much gas is coming out. Never take for granted

the Bunsen burner at school kids. The little tripods that went over them with the beaker that sat on top. Oh my God. You don't know how lucky you are.

Unless you get into meth production you're never going to see one again. Oh. And there's money to be made. That sounds like a lucrative industry. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the Top Six.

Hello there. Katy Perry's announced her pregnancy. Her and Orlando Bloom are expecting. Are expecting, baby. Now, she did this in her music video. I've Never Worn White is the name of the song. Yeah, it's right at the end. She holds her baby bump.

Why? What are the other meanings behind the song? Never Worn White. Well she, when she got married to Russell Brand, she wore grey. She wore a grey dress. She's never worn white when she got married. She wore a grey like grey dress so she's never worn she's white when she's

married. No they haven't had their wedding yet. Orlando Bloom. But she's engaged to Orlando Bloom right? White's not very slimming. And

spills. You're big for spills. You'd probably have a butter chicken down your Yeah. Or no that's the thing because you know lately I've been wearing

a white t-shirt and the other day I got chocolate stain on it. Yeah, it's hard. And plus, like, the white dress is always pretty spinny. I got muddled down mine, like, before I'd even walked down the aisle the second time. Yeah, right.

So you run the risk. Yeah. I've just gone to the part where she's holding the baby. She's quite far along. Any word on how many weeks? I haven't seen how many weeks. But she's confirmed, but she's been keeping this secret for a long time.

She said she's been, yeah, she's been holding bags and big bags in front of her and stuff. And even in this music video, just skipping through all the costumes of early ballet covering. Right. Yeah. But she announced it in a music video, but I thought the top six other ways she could have announced

her pregnancy using her own lyrics. Great. So number six, she could have written, I'm pregnant on a plastic bag. And then said, do you ever feel like a plastic bag? Grab that plastic bag. But then it's very hard to get a plastic bag. Yeah.

Now it is. Yeah. Very hard to get a single use plastic bag. And the heavier ones yeah. Yeah, very hard to get a single-use plastic bag. And the heavier ones don't blow in the wind quite poetically, do they? Question. What are we doing for bin liners now? Because I've just ran out of my big 50 roll of bin liners that started pre-plastic bag ban.

How often do you go through a bin? How often do you fill a bin? Not that much. We go through two bin liners a day. What? We're a family of four. Oh, yeah, I don't go through that much. How often do you fill a bin? Not that much. We go through two bin liners a day. What? We're a family of four. Oh, yeah, I don't go through that much. Yeah, we go...

Two a day. Yeah, well, we've got the little bin too. Yeah, I've got a little... Yeah, so what do you put in those now? Bin liners. But you can still buy them. Yeah. You can get ones that are better for the environment.

But they're biodegradable bin liners. Oh, right. So once they're in the landfill, they'll dissolve and let all the non-dissolvables leach into the water table. Oh, great. Okay. Nothing to worry about.

Just chill, man. Yeah, but no, they're still salvos. Okay. All right, good. Number five on the list of the top six other ways Katy Perry could have announced her pregnancy using her own lyrics. She could have said,

She's a baby. I'll call her karma. I love her heart out. Like Jeffrey Dahmer. Obviously that last bit needs some work because he was a serial killer. Yeah. Not a loving father. No.

But, you know, Dark Horse sitting there ripe for the picking. Yep. Number four on the list of the top six ways Katy Perry could have announced her pregnancy using her own lyrics. You know, birthday cake when she says, so let me get you in your birthday suit. It's time to bring out the big balloons. Yeah. Now that's, of course, in reference to her breasts.

Yeah. She could have said, so let me get you in your birthday suit. It's time to bring out the bigger balloons because during pregnancy, the breast or the mammary gland of the female mammal expands to facilitate milk production for the soon-to-be-born live infant. Right. Thanks for that. Bit of a nature lesson

there. Yeah, very. And the balloons would be bigger. Yeah. Number three on the list of Katy Perry lyrics that she could have used to announce her pregnancy, the song This Is How We Do. She could have said, announce her pregnancy. The song, This Is How We Do. She could have said, Yo, shout out to all you kids buying prenatal vitamins with your rent money.

Respect. Of course, that was originally table service. Yeah. Which is not a great way to spend your rent money. And it's important to have a roof over your head when you have the baby. So, you know, take that as you will. Number two on the list of the top six other ways Katy Perry could have announced her pregnancy. Instead of California girls, she could have said, I'm having a baby.

Fits perfectly. Does it? Syllables. Sounds lazy. And finally, number one on the list of the top six ways Katy Perry could have announced her pregnancy. The song Firework. Yeah. Where she's like, baby baby you're a firework.

She could have said, I'm having a baby now here's fireworks. And fireworks could have gone off. All great ways. Sure. But she could have announced her pregnancy. That is today's top six.

Fantastic. Mum's just messaged compostable tie top bags. Look at that photo. That's all I need. Is that, I don't know, see if I've got the same.

I'm proud of her. Serious chat. We need to address the fact that syphilis, an STI, is on the rise in New Zealand. This was one that you never used to hear, well, I never used to hear about. It was always chlamydia. Maybe a smidge of gonorrhea.

Bit of gons. Bit of gongons. A smidge of gons. Just a sprinkling of gons. But you never heard about syphilis back in the day. Why is it on the rise? Back in the day when I used to have sex. Oh, my gosh.

Oh, the 90s. Yeah. No, that's a joke. I didn't have sex in the 90s either. I was going to say the handful of times. It was a very small period in the 2000s. Well, obviously because people aren't protecting themselves. Right.

And maybe they're not being tested. Maybe they don't know they have it. And then spreading it. Not telling people that, yeah. Or maybe they don't know and then they're sleeping with other people. Right. But it's gone up a lot since 2017, and Auckland is the top of the list with 248 known infections.

And that's, like you say, that's just what we know. Yeah. Because if someone hasn't been tested for like six months or a year, then that could be a lot. They could be a spreader. Yeah. I don't know. Do you always see symptoms? six months or a year, then that could be a lot. It could be a spreader. Yeah. I don't know.

Do you always see symptoms? Or could you spread it? I think it depends what it is. Could you be like a carrier and not know? Yeah, you might not know. Yeah, you might not know. Symptoms of syphilis. I just put symptoms of gonorrhea, chlamydia, clap, HIV, pregnancy, syphilis. Just never go to the images.

Oh, yeah, don't go to the images. Yeah. That won't make you morning. Body rashes that can last two to six weeks, often on the palms of your hands and the soles of your feet. Mild fever, fatigue, sore throat, hair loss, weight loss, swollen glands, headache and muscle pains. Weight loss?

Syphilis, you say? Yeah, no, that sounds awful. I think raw chicken would be a better way there. It is, like, so gonorrhea and chlamydia are way more common, but syphilis, you never used to hear about it, is growing. You said Auckland, because, you know, in the past

Hamilton and Gizzy have been, you know, the laughing stock. But this is a pure numbers game. This is a pure, right, okay. Yeah. So in Auckland, there's 11,442 chlamydia cases in the past year. 3,293 gonorrhea. So chlamydia is still like the most popular.

Right. But Auckland is still the most popular. It's like vanilla ice cream, Megan. I don't get it. Yeah. You don't get it. Why vanilla ice cream is the most... It's like vanilla ice cream, Megan. I don't get it, yeah. You don't get it. Why vanilla ice cream is... It's a popular.

Because it goes with everything, doesn't it? It's an easy one. Yeah. Gonorrhea is on the rise steadily since 2017. That's more common in males than it is females too. Right. But yeah. So also what you're saying is don't sleep with anyone from Auckland.

Especially the males. I haven't got this in a per capita breakdown though. This is just pure cases. Right. So it could be... But then, so Auckland would because it's got more people. Yeah. Be higher. Yeah. There's zero cases in Nelson and Marlborough of syphilis though, so I mean that's

the one part of the country that you're safe from syphilis. Imagine next, like imagine being the first person to take that into the city. Be like, you were the carrier that started syphilis. Imagine next, like imagine being the first person to take that into the city. Be like, you were the carrier that started syphilis in Nelson.

Well, it's a flight away, isn't it? Yeah. It's not like Nelson's isolated. No. Here's a fact. Yeah.

You know how they talk about patient zero? Yeah. Yeah. And it's the first person that brings it in. Yeah. Well,

this actually came about when they were mapping and studying the spread of HIV in the 90s. And it was actually patient O. And the O stood for outside of California. And they knew this patient and they were trying to track down and it said patient O because it was outside. But somebody thought it said zero.

And so patient zero, the saying, patient zero, about being the first person with it actually is patient O and it meant that they were coming from outside the area. Because it actually doesn't make sense saying patient zero. Because it should be patient one. Patient one, yeah.

Interesting. But it's like such a patient zero is such a like it conjures up because they use it in that monkey movie. Yeah, it's just you use all the time now, isn't it? With Gwyneth Paltrow, Contagion.

Contagion, she was patient zero. Everyone is streaming now on Netflix because of what's happening now. I don't know if I want to watch that. But apparently it's like really a good how to avoid it. Oh, really? Right. Lock yourself in your house. Don't touch your face and don't go out. Right.

This is why. This is why. This is why. The Podcast ZM. There's an old song, As Old As Time, that goes, A peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time. Oldest time. As Old As Time, yeah. Oldest time itself. It was first written in the first draft of the Bible.

Oh, right, Matthew wrote to Luke in the Corinthians. A peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time. That's a hymn I'd like to do at the church. Peanut butter jelly time. It needs a slight alteration. Yeah, right. Peanut butter, peanut, no. Peanut slabby ice cream time. Peanut slabby peanut, no, peanut slabby ice cream time,

peanut slabby ice cream time, peanut slabby ice cream time. I saw this people commenting, the comments, the shares were insane yesterday when this news broke. That's right, the, I believe they're a little boutique chocolate operation. Yeah, right. And of course, their

infamous peanut slab is being turned into a chocolate ice cream bar. How good is a peanut? You forget how good peanut slabs are. I remember when I could eat them. So I had a peanut allergy as a kid, and then I went through puberty. I sprung some pubes. And all of a sudden.

A little hair under the armpit. Penis didn't grow at all, so ripped off. Disappointing. Still waiting for the MD. My nine-year-old penis, but that's okay. I've learned to – I'm all right with it. That's life. And then you can grow out of a peanut allergy.

Then I could have a peanut slab. I thought you were about to say something else. Yeah, right. It's a classic. Now, they've teamed up with Tip Top, haven't they? So this is a... And is it on a stick? It doesn't look like it's a bar.

Nope, it's a little slab. So is it like... Slab like an Eskimo pie. Is it like those crunchy bars? Have you had one of those? They're real yum. A crunchy ice cream bar. Yeah, it's just like an outer hard chocolate

and an inside just ice cream. Just a high-grade, high-grade flavoured ice cream. Yeah, pretty much. Well, this one is, it sounds similar. Chocolate coat. Yeah. No, carry on. I do have a question when you're done.

That big, deep breath in. It was either I've got a point to raise or you were erotically like, you were aroused. Yeah, right. So chocolate, ice cream and peanuts. Actual peanuts? Here's my question. In the picture on the wrapper, it's got whole peanuts in the ice cream. Yes.

Would they go rock hard? What was a peanut like frozen? Oh, I don't want whole peanuts in the ice cream. Yeah, or is it going to be little chunks? I think it would be chunks, surely. I think it would be better with chunks of peanuts, but it says chocolate ice cream with roasted peanut pieces. So does that mean a half a peanut?

Pieces. Because a half a peanut. That's half a peanut. You'd say half a peanut, wouldn't you? You wouldn't say with half peanut pieces. No, you wouldn't. You just wouldn't. You'd say peanut pieces because some could be broken down further through the roasting process. Well, it's out and

fat. This is why. This is why. because some could be broken down further through the roasting process. Well, it's out and... Fat. This is why. Fat. This is why. This is why. This is why. Fat. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast.

What's that sound? ZM's. $100,000 secret sound. With Z, my bacon. Thanks to Save My Bacon, making borrowing better for financially responsible Kiwis and soundkeeper Gary. Good morning. Good morning, guys.

$75,000 is the new jackpot. We're pretty close to the top now, aren't we? It's never been that high, has it? Never, never. And everyone's playing. I got a call from my mum yesterday saying her and all her workmates are playing and that she's got some feedback. She says that I need to take longer. I need to pause longer.

And then I should use... What do you mean? You pause long enough. We don't have time for these sorts of pauses. We don't have time for these 30 second pauses. And she says that I should use a song

when I say no. What, to make them feel better? Yeah, yeah. So she says it should be Crazy Frog. We're not listening to your mum. With all due respect. Two terrible ideas. She said, you know, like,

bum, bum, bum, ba-dum, ba-dum, bum, bum. You're wrong. Oh, my God. Is what her suggestion was. So, uh... Gosh, at least we know she's your mother. She can't win, though. It would look very suspicious, Gary,

if her and her workmates won the secret sale. Did you tell her that she's not allowed to enter? I have. Okay, good. She kind of works for us technically because she works at the airport moving cars around and I sometimes get her to change the presets to ZM. Yeah, right, so she's an employee.

How do people feel about that when they get back in their car after a trip to the airport and it's not on their favourite radio station? Didn't know. Didn't think about that. Not great. You've got a new favourite now. It's us. You're stuck with us.

All right. Playing this morning. Kylie. Good morning, Kylie. Good morning. How are you guys? Good, good. All right.

Well, you've got through $75,000. Just while you've been on hold there, have you kind of thought about what you'd do with that cash? We got married last year, so we may have been going on a honeymoon. Ooh, $75,000. Would you spend it all on the honeymoon? No, definitely. I'll probably pay the rest off on my mortgage.

Yeah, right. Well, I tell you what, you'll get some post-corona specials to Europe. When this does come down, there are going to be some absolute bargains around. So you'll get a good honeymoon. All right, well, Kylie,

this is the secret sound. $75,000 cash is yours if you can tell us what that is. I think it's when Gary undoes the door handle and the last bit of the sound is when the seal is pulling away from his Jeep. So, sorry, say again. It's what?

So when Gary undoes the door handle on his Jeep and the seal is sort of pulling away from the car when he undoes it. Right. Like when you haven't been in your car for a while but it's been hot and so the seal's a little bit... Yeah, so the seal pulls away from... Yeah, so the door handle and the seal. That's the door on the Black Thunder, isn't it?

Yeah, the Black Thunder, yeah. And then at the end of the video, he says it takes it home after work, so he might take the secret down home. Oh, okay, yeah, right. You noticed that? Because those door handles, you have to push the button to kind of... They're real clunky, aren't they?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. Kylie? Yes? That is not the secret sound. Oh, damn it.

You're wrong. It works. Maybe Moana was onto something here. Maybe Moana knew more than what she was letting on there. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Husband and wife had a very interesting night. The wife was at home and the husband had gone out with the lads. It had been a long stint, a 12-hour drinking stint with the lads.

The lads. Lads, lads, lads. You've got your lads weekend coming up. Yep. Today, you're lads. Are you excited for that? Very. Yes, I'm very excited.

Is Party Vaughan coming up? Yes, I'm really excited. Party Vaughan coming out? I don't know. No, I don't think any more than usual. Okay. Oh, boring. Boring.

It's Lads Weekend. Let's, lads, lads, lads. You Okay. Oh, boring. Boring. Let's wait again. Let's wait, let's wait. You're having a, like, past woman. I know, but if party Vaughan comes out, it means Monday Vaughan has to deal with that. And then Tuesday Vaughan's a very busy Vaughan. Yeah, right. I don't even know what hungover Vaughan's like anymore.

I know. It's been a while. Yeah. Plus, that kind of worries me because sometimes I do drink a lot and I wake up the next morning, I'm like, well, I'm not hungover. What have I done to myself?

Yeah, right. I've pickled my insides so much that it just goes straight through me now. Who knows? And you're Negi Wolf on a good day. Imagine like. Excuse me, Megan, I'm a ray of sunshine. I'm a beam of positivity. That's how everyone describes you.

I am the flashlight of morality. I am the halogen bulb of good times. That's why you've got so many moths hanging around you. Yes, that's why I draw in a lot of moths. So this happened in the UK.

Don't start that. A guy messaged his wife to say he's coming home and he's bringing pizza. Okay. Um, so this was late at night. He was... He thinks he's doing a great deed here, by the way, because he's assuming he's hungry. So why wouldn't everybody be?

Yeah. It was late. And so he comes home and this wouldn't fly with me. If you'd ordered the pizza, you have to wait for it. He'd said to his partner, the pizza's coming. The pizza's coming. You wait at the door. So she's like, okay, I'll wait.

I don't know quite whether he was going to go have a shower or what the deal was. She then greets the delivery guy, and he's carrying 19 boxes of food. Okay. He spent, and I've calculated it, in New Zealand dollars, $363 at Domino's. At Domino's?

Those pizzas are like 50 cents each. Well, they're not 50 cents, but yeah. He got- But yeah, your $5 pizzas, that would be- They're the cheapest on the market. He got 15 sides of chicken wings. He's a good man. There's 14 in each of those. Oh, but maybe he thought he was getting of chicken wings. He's a good man. And there's 14 in each of those.

Oh, but maybe he thought he was getting 15 chicken wings. Yeah, maybe he went, I want chicken wings. And his drunk state was like, well, I want 15 of them. But that was 15 boxes. Yeah. He got Domino's cookies. He got potato wedges. He got garlic bread.

He got a stuffed crust pizza. But then he added everything. He added pepperoni mushrooms, onions, bacon, green peppers, jalapenos, tandoori chicken, garlic and extra mozzarella. This is why I can't order things when I'm drunk. But he did send

a drunken text to his girlfriend and it could be that he kept trying to order and he was like, it's not working. Right. Okay. But it was working.

So yeah, $366 worth of Domino's. So she greeted the guy at the door. He helped the delivery guy, helped her take in all the boxes. And then when she went upstairs to take him some of his food, he passed out and wasn't waking up for anything. So she's like, cool.

Brilliant. I am. Yep. So much chicken. Well, at least I guess you can reheat it, right? I mean, you probably shouldn't, but yeah. Eat it cold. It's the danger of apps though,

because like everything you think of those places you can buy your food online, your credit cards loaded in there. Yeah. You just have to go tap, done, and it comes to your door. This is why I've gone to work at least two or three times and seen Uber Eats at the front door of my apartment building, cold. And people definitely pass out.

Yeah, yeah. Fools asleep or passes out. And there was one that stayed there for like a whole day and a half. Oh, my God. An Uber Eats bag on the front doorstep. Next time this happens, put a hand to it if it's warm. Bring it on in. It's yours. It's free, right? Bring it on

in to work. We'll all have a little summit. Well, off the back of the sky, ordering a bunch of Domino's, I would love to know what you have ordered drunk. Drunk ordering. Like some drunk online shopping and it surprised you either when you've gone to see

your credit card statement or your online banking. Yeah. Or it's turned up in the mail and you're like, what? Yeah, how did that happen? That happens to me a lot. But you're not drunk.

No. No. I was like, oh, that's right. I ordered that. Just forgetful. Whoopsies. Right. Okay, so what you want to hear

from people when they've made a drunk order. A drunk purchase. Whether it's accidental or not. Yeah. Well, you messed it up like this guy and ordered too much. All right, give us a call. 0800-DARLES-AN-AM-9696. Just had the news broken to me.

In Domino's, a pizza's about $40. It's a 20-pound pizza in the UK. Pizza. Somebody just said pizzas are insanely expensive in the UK. Oh, move to New Zealand. They're five bucks. Come on now.

Maybe just wait till this whole Corona thing blows over. Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. We'd like to know

what you have ordered drunk after a guy in the UK spent $366 in New Zealand dollars on his Domino's order and then passed out before he ate any of it.

Drunk order. Your drunk purchases are your drunk orders. Briar, what did you accidentally order drunk? I bought what I thought were Green Day tickets and it turned out to be the Green Day musical. Oh, no! Which I've heard very good things about. It was

absolutely amazing. I would absolutely recommend it if it came back. But yeah, I was so excited by it. See, not all drunken purchases are bad things. Her eyes have been opened to a world of musical theatre. Yeah.

I figured it out the next morning when I was sobering up. You're like, how are they going to fit that concert in that little tiny theatre? I didn't realise where it was. I didn't take any notice of where the actual concert was.

I was just like, great, great. Oh my God, yes, my food. You were in. Brilliant. Brian, thanks for your call. Some text messages. I had to buy flowers for a mate. I remembered after I'd had a few lemonades

and picked the prettiest ones. Turns out that was a $150 bunch of flowers. Yeah, flowers are spinnies. Yeah. Someone said, it wasn't exactly an order, but I did have a go in a spray tank while drunk. That's a... A what?

A spray tan tank. I don't know why it's a tank. They had to go, what, doing themselves? Not what you should do. I had to hide for a week. Yeah, they self... Oh no! That would be patchy and they would be like real dark bits. I hope they got the colour right.

Well, they had to hide for a week. I'd imagine there was a possibility of being cancelled. Oh my God. You didn't even have to hide for a week. We'll. There was a possibility of being cancelled. We didn't have to hide for a week. We'll try to wait for it to... Wow. I bought a 12-book series that I've been waiting on for months. Had to buy the books individually and accidentally got 16 of them because I got four double-ups in my drunken ordering.

Could you send them back? So sweetly innocent. Yeah, I really wanted to read a book. So bad you're ordering it when you're drunk. Yeah. Cute. I'm going to list something out there in crazy. I'm ordering a book.

Stand by. Party girl's here. I'm ordering a book. My dad bought a whole ute from America while he was drunk. He had no idea about it until he got an email a few days later saying he'd won an auction. And he was like, what's going on here? And then he had to sort out how to get a ute back. So I don't know if he

decided to look into shipping while he was also drunk. I got drunk and did my tax refund. Forgot all about it and thanked myself later. I had a $700 tax refund pop up in my bank account. Nice. Well, I don't know if they did it right. They got $700 back. They might be texting from prison. Dean, what did you right. In my bank account. Nice. Well, I don't know if they did it right. They lost $700. They might be texting from prison. Dean, what did you mistakenly do drunk?

Well, I was in Italy with one of my oldest mates, and we were drunk. And I'd met these boys in Croatia a few weeks ago before that, and they FaceTimed me, and they were, like, partying, having the time of their lives. Yeah. Beautiful women and everything. And I was like, well, I'm going to buy a flight to Greece.

Yeah. I bought a flight to Greece. And then the next morning I was actually supposed to fly to Malta with my best mate. Yeah. And I woke up and I was like, oh, God, what have I done? I've got a flight to Greece and I've got to tell my best mate. This all sounds horrible.

Yeah. I'm not actually going to Malta. Didn't you also say you wanted to go to Croatia? Nah, like I've met them in Croatia. Oh, you've met them in Croatia. I was like, you went to Greece, you're in the wrong country. Okay, good. Alright, thanks you called Dean.

Some drunk orders. I once ordered eight shiwis from Wish. I was drunk on Facebook, got some Wish targeted advertising. I thought I can give these to the girls. Yeah, I was going to say either you were like, I'll give them to the girls or you were at a party and be like, who wants one?

Who wants to go wheeze in a bush without having to squat down and piddle all down your legs? I got you. But they said, first person laughed, but it turned out to be a bloody handy purchase. Right. Have you ever used a shiwi, Megan? I never have, no.

I just don't, no. No. It doesn't really appeal. Yeah. I'm not really like a squat down in the bush kind of person unless I'm desperate. I've got like an iron bladder. Then you wouldn't need to squat down in the bush even if you were desperate. Yeah, I know, but it's still going out in public, isn't it?

Yeah, right. Okay, all right. Next on the show, Megan had an embarrassing incident yesterday, which we need to talk about. Did you ask if I was all right? Well, you're still here, but you're fine, aren't you? ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Yesterday, just before the end of the show, Megan went to the bathroom

and she was gone for a while, which is unlike Megan, as just previously stated, iron bladder. Yep. In and out. And then when you go, very quickly.

Get it done. Get out of there. Get back in here. Yeah. And she was gone for a little while, wasn't she? Long enough that I was like, hmm,

where's she gone? But not long enough to be like, send out search and rescue. Yeah. Well, I mean, the toilet's, hmm, where's she gone? But not long enough to be like, send out search and rescue. Yeah. Well, I mean, the toilets are, what, 50 metres away. It's fine.

But we've got search and rescue in this building for a reason. Yeah. And it's hard these days because all the songs are short. So when you need to go to a toilet, you've got to really boost it. Two and a half minutes.

Well, yeah, if you wanted to go just then, that 660 song was two minutes, 51 seconds. Rude. To get to the toilet and back. Yeah. What's an extra 30 seconds, 660?

Help a sister out. And you've got to wash your hands for 30 seconds now. Yeah. Twinkle, twinkle, little star, how I wonder what you are. Up above the waterline. I like how you say, we've got to wash our hands for 30 seconds now. As if a few weeks ago, we were just like, whip them under the tap. I've always been washing my hands,

but I've never been given it the full 30. But I tell you what, your hands do feel cleaner after the full 30. Yeah. I'll give you that, health officials. I'll give you that, doctors. So yesterday, as we mentioned, I was boosting it to the toilet.

I never run, just a swift pace on. And the floors around here, is it tiled? Tiled floors. It's hard. It's hard like concrete. And as I was boosting it to the toilet outside one of the other studios, there's windows so they could see me, my shoe flicked out from under me and I literally went down.

Did you go down like Oprah when she was talking about balance? Yes, I did. I saw about it, balance. It was like a crumple to the ground. Yeah, yeah. And like no time to get my hands out because my foot was under the impression that there was going to be,

it was a platformy sandal. Yeah, right. It was under the impression that there was going to be something there to support it and then there wasn't and I crumpled into a heap and I've hurt my knee. So I crumpled into a heap. And I've hurt my knee.

So I came back and I had a sore knee. And I've actually got a bruise. Quite a good bruise. Not as good as I'd hoped. Yeah, right. You know what it really hurts? You're like, oh, I hope that comes up real decent. But two things.

The whole studio full of people went to the window and to their credit, didn't laugh. Maybe they saved the laughing till afterwards. They didn't laugh, but they did want to know. They were just banging through the window, being like, are you okay? And then one guy tried to come over and I think he was going to help me up, but then almost had like a look in his eyes like,

am I allowed to touch you? Better not. Stood back. So I was like, are you okay? And I was like, yeah, I'm fine. Two things, sexual harassment and coronavirus. You could have slammed him with both or either. He didn't want to touch me. He didn't want to help me up.

But he asked if I was okay. Yeah, right. But the saddest part is now I didn't skin my knee, but I've got a perfect circle of white on my knee where it ripped the tan off. It ripped my fake tan off my knee. The tile tore the tan away. Could you just do like a little patch of Bondi Sands on that?

I don't know. Can you do patchwork? I'm not sure it works like that. Go to the local panel beater. They'll buff it. Just say cash job. They'll do a little touch up. Yeah.

So I've got a bruise on one side and then a perfect circle white patch on the other side. From your tumble. But I'm okay. Thanks for asking. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. It's Polly, Molly, Molly, Molly, Molly.

Polly, Molly, Molly, Molly. Come on. The relationship edition. Polly, Molly. Today is all about relationships. We've asked you a bunch of questions, polls, on our Instagram, FVMZM. And wow. It's good because you can comment and vote anonymously.

So people have gotten into this. Well, I mean, it's not anonymous. It's not anonymous when you vote on a poll. Well, we're not going to say, you know. Well, no, we're not going to. We're not going to release your details. We're not going to out you. This is kind of like our own little snapshot.

You know when you hear people on the radio all the time read out some stats. Yeah. We've learned that 70% of people, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. We thought, well, why not conduct our own? It's our own. So we know in New Zealand, because those are often overseas polls.

Yeah. Okay, so the first question in Pi Moli Relationship Edition was, have you ever cheated on someone? Yes, 25%. I honestly thought that would have been higher. Same. That's quite low, isn't it? But then again, this isn't an anonymous vote.

Yeah, but they don't care if we know, right? We're not going to tell the nation every single person that voted yes. Yeah. But 75% said, yeah, no, I would never cheat on someone. Wow. Okay. Next one. Have you ever had sexy time at work?

What's sexy time? What does that mean? Well, sexy time, doesn't it? I mean, it's more than a kiss. I mean, you guys don't work with your partners at work, but executive intern Anya, Mr Bun Buns, works right upstairs. No, absolutely not. He brings you a couple of wet bags.

You don't even get a little peck when he delivers you breakfast. No, it's all business, no pleasure between the hours of five and nine. He's a businessman. He's never given you a little kiss in the elevator. Nah, sometimes he tries to hold my hand and I wait until we're in the courtyard and I'm like, okay, now is acceptable hand-holding time. Because those people around him are like,

ooh. Oh, I don't give a... I do not care. Anytime he's around is go time. Yeah, I think about... You run a cafe, woman. Not in the kitchen. But you don't... But on the servery?

You don't kiss in the servery near the barista. Yeah, if I'm leaving, I'll give him a kiss goodbye. You customers don't want to see that. That might be the last time I see him.

You want to see meningitis in the workplace? Oh, my God. Hepatitis A, B, C, 3, D. What if I had a car crash on the way home? And I'm like, that was the last time I saw him and I didn't give him a kiss.

No stuff, people. I'm going to kiss him when I want. But anyway, have you had sexy time at work? No, 82%. So 18% of people have. There you go. You're in the majority. Yeah.

Executive intern, aren't you? Boring. Have you ever dumped someone for someone else? Ooh, okay. So not cheated, dumped and then on someone else. 67% said no, but 33% have.

Are people lying? That doesn't seem very high. You think it should be higher? Yeah. Okay. Have you dated someone 10 or more years older than you? No, I haven't. We should have said and or.

These questions feel very pointed. 84% said no, but 16% said they have. Get amongst it. It's good times. It would be interesting to see that the other way around. If 84% said they hadn't dated someone 10 years older than them, had they dated someone 10 years younger than them? Yeah, right.

And have you been in a relationship you kept secret? This one's juicy. Because this one we also said slide into our DMs with your stories. So I'll tell you some stories. Have you got some stories? Because there's a lot of reasons you'd keep a relationship secret. Maybe your parents wouldn't like the guy. Your friends wouldn't like the guy.

Maybe you work together. You work together. Maybe it's a religious thing as well or a race thing. Yeah. Like in this day and age, shock horror. Well, 41% of people have been in a relationship and kept it secret for whatever reason. Here's some of the reasons. Okay.

Somebody said, I secretly dated and had adult fun times with the person that was my childhood babysitter. She's 10 years older than me and our family was good friends, so we kept it secret from everybody. They would have felt very pointed with these questions, especially that one about the have you ever dated someone 10 years older. Yeah. That applies to a few of them, right? Yeah. Somebody else said, we've been in a secret relationship

for 10 years in May and we're just telling our parents about our relationship now. 10 years? What? I'm sorry, but what do they have to keep secret? I don't know.

Have they elaborated on that? No, that was all they wrote. That's such a long time. How and why? I don't know. Is it a same-sex relationship? Maybe, but even there, it drives me crazy to hear parents choosing some outdated point of view over their own children. Yeah.

It's nuts. This is another one. I'm in a relationship that's been kept secret for nearly 14 years. Why? He's 36 years older than me and he was my boss. We couldn't be seen in public so often worked late. His wife found out after about 10 years and she confronted us, but of course we both denied it.

He sold the business and left. No one at work has ever found out the truth, even though his wife made accusations but was blaming the wrong female for a while. His wife left him and we've continued the relationship to this day, still not being seen in public. truth, even though his wife made accusations but was blaming the wrong female for a while. His wife left him and we've continued the relationship to this day. Still not being seen in public unless we're overseas together. It works

well. Isn't that just sad though? Like, there's no reason to keep it secret anymore. The wife's out of the picture. The wife's gone so it's your time to shine. So maybe that's why it works. Because it's kind of like a little bit secret and fun and keeps it exciting. Right.

But as long as both parties are on board with that and someone's just not telling the other person that it's got to be kept secret for the reason that doesn't exist anymore. And this one about keeping a relationship secret. When I first started seeing my ex, we had one night where things got a little carried away on the text messages. Yeah. I went to bed a happier man. I thought, this has been nice. I woke up the next day, didn't hear anything from her all morning, which is unusual. At four in the afternoon, I got a call from her number.

I picked it up and I said, hello. I heard an older female voice say, hello, this is so-and-so's mother. I don't want you to talk to my daughter again We dated in secret for six months Until she introduced me to her parents as a different person Because if it was all over text Yeah right Wow

That's a good idea actually Good on them Keep it secret Yeah ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast Let me take you down to Funky Town now No don't say that actually. Get on them. Keep it secret. Yeah. Yeah. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Let me take you down to Funky Town now.

No, don't say that. This is what we do when the show ends. All right. We walked into Ladies Lunchtime Stroll. We walked into the city for a lunchtime stroll. Yeah. And shout out, my wife messaged me saying, do we have sausages in the freezer? Hot chat. Is this what married life is like? No.

Just for Bonin. I said, dig around in that chest freezer and you'll find a bag of sausages. Because there are sausages in the chest freezer. Okay. She was making in New Zealand. I said, dig around in that chest freezer and you'll find a bag of sausages. Because there are sausages in the chest freezer. Okay, she was making deviled sausages. So, like, the day only got more sexy from the initial sausage-based inquiry. Oh, deviled sausages. How good?

Cannot remember the last time. Treat yourself. That is one of the childhood dishes that's as good as it was then. Very 80s. And did you use the Maggi sachet? Yep. What do you have with it? Mashed potatoes?

What do we have? It was a little uncouth, actually, if I might say. We had a cold salad. Oh. A cold salad and devil's... No, what are you doing? Yeah, almost a slaw sort of a situation, whereas you normally would be accompanied by a steamed veg. Yeah, some hot veggies.

And a mashed tato. Anyway, it was delicious regardless, but the journey is what I wish to discuss, because she said, is there any sausages in the freezer? I said, yep. And so she went out and she said, then she messaged me saying, have you had a throwout of

stuff in the freezer? I said, no. She said, I thought it was full. I said, it is full. And then she said, oh God, it stinks. And it was at that stage that she said, and it's all very warm. It's switched off at the wall. Wow.

So we went and chased freezer. And when my parents get home kill done, we split the cost and snaffle up some home kill. And there was other meaty bits and pieces in there. There's some frozen vegetables? No. It's just for your big meaty bits.

And like this was the sad part about the defrosting of the freezer is that every birthday the kids had we've kept like the little thing off the top of the cake. Oh, no. But when August turned two, she had an Olaf cake. And so we had the Olaf.

It wasn't made of icing. Let's take a photo. Why do you need that crap flying around? Well, we've got photos and stuff. Why are you, I don't know. Did it melt? Sentimental. Oh, mate.

Oh, no. Olaf. Olaf looked like he was actually a very unwell Olaf. So a baton. Yeah. Like. What's a baton? A piece of wood.

A baton that you would use in a fence, a farm fence. Oh, yeah. Because my granddad's farm had these Totra posts and battens in it. And they were made from Totra that fell on the farm. Were you going to have to cancel you for deforesting? No, this was. I didn't do it. It was way back in the day. So that's okay. Go start cancelling people in the 1800s. You've got a long list of things you have to cancel you for deforesting? No, this was, I didn't do it. It was way back in the day.

So that's okay. Go start cancelling people in the 1800s. You've got a long list of things you have to cancel them for. Okay. So I said to Dad, I want a grey one because it's quite cool in the woods. Beautiful. I would anyway. It had been sitting up in the garage and something had knocked it

and the chances, very slim, it fell and slid down the wall and as it slid by, the very end of the post clipped the switch off. How's that? If it had been an inch further, it would have gone, and hit the plug. If it had been an inch less, it would have slipped straight past. But the exact way it fell, as it slid down the wall, it went switch and switched off the freezer.

Oh, no. Now, we did some quick calculations as to when this could possibly have happened, when there's been movement in the garage sufficient to cause the slide of a baton and it would be a month ago. You haven't opened the chest freezer for a month. No. Oh yuck. It's been so

warm. It's been so warm. So it had sealed. Yep. It had sealed. It had not yet got to the point of rot where if you know anything about rot the gas starts to come off

and it'll like belch so the pressure inside the freezer would get enough that it would just pop the lid off a little bit and let out some stinky gas it hadn't got to that stage yet

but it must have been very close because the minute the fridge got open the freezer got opened flies arrived question how much does

a chest freezer cost? Because I would have had that straight on a trailer, backed it up at the dump, and just slid it off, whatever it cost. I'm not opening that and cleaning that out. You didn't clean that out. I cleaned it, baby. I'm a smith. Oh, that's disgusting.

One, we hate spending money. Two, we weirdly enjoy a challenge. Yeah, right. And as soon as Sade said, because you said it the same, you said tape it up and throw it out. She said, I think we should masking tape it shut and just dump the whole thing. Yeah.

I was like, Sade gets it. No. I get Sade, yeah. She's like, well, I'm not helping. You do it. So I stopped on the way home before I even saw the situation and bought like hospital grade disinfectants and I had the lot. Was it even

possible to buy that with the current coronavirus outbreak? Yeah, Mitre 10 still had it. Yeah, right. I'm not a big thing of it. It smelled lovely too. It smelled like a very clean old folks home. Okay, right. Your freezer did after. So I set about cleaning it. It was so

rank. Everything's bagged though, right? You don't have to like. Yeah, but it oozed out of the bag. How did you pick it out? Did you get some tongs? I got, no, when I was also at Mitre 10, I bought chemical grade gloves, which are great.

They're so thick. So I was picking them out. I had a mask on. Yeah, right. Like a full-blown mask that I built for sanding. Not just one of those face masks. So I'm going to be sweet when Corona goes crazy. So I've already got the mask.

And yeah, spent a few hours cleaning out the rankest stink. Oh, that's disgusting. I've ever smelled. Or even, I couldn't smell it through the mask, but even afterwards when I took it off. And our wheelie bin is full of... You put it in the wheelie bin? You can't put it in the wheelie bin.

When's the rubbish coming? Today. And got loaded up and wheeled to the end of't put it in the wheel. When's the rubbish coming? Today. And go load it up and wheel to the end of the driveway at the very moment and it's not coming back in until it's ready to be hot washed. You need to pour like 200 litres of bleach in that thing. There will be. There will be. So I just

want everybody today, check your fridge and freezer to the switch. Tape it. I've taped it now. Right. Everything's taped. Yeah. It's taped into the wall. The switch is taped on. It's taped. And now we always also put something on top of the freezer that's weighted. So just to keep it sharp.

I think you're being a bit overboard now, but okay. Well, you didn't say that thing. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. What's that sound? ZM's. $100,000 secret sound. All thanks to Save My Bacon making borrowing better for financially responsible Kiwis. Soundkeeper Gary is in. Good, guys.

Hey, how we going? Good. Oh, what? A jackpot for you? On a Friday. No, but again, you just jackpotted yesterday to 75,000. Yes, we did. Well, it's at that point now, isn't it,

where it's kind of in for a penny, in for a pound? I don't know what that means. If you're going to go in, you might as well go all in. Yeah, but at least use a currency that we use. Right. If you're in for a threepence, you're in for a crown. If you're putting 10 cents in, put a dollar in. You may as well put a dollar in if it's 10 cents.

Yeah, so I've just won a little bit in the back pocket for getting myself out of a sticky situation. But we're jackpotting now to $80,000. Oh, my God. 80 grand. Wow, that is nuts. Wow. Like our highest ever cash prize is $50,000.

That's what we started on as well. With Secret Sound, that's what we started with. Wow, so here you go. $80,000. That is a life-changing amount of money. I mean, $50,000 is, but $80,000. And there's no way this is going to get split between divisions. No.

One person's going to get it. Maria, good morning. Good morning. Well, great timing for you because it's just to get it. Maria, good morning. Good morning. Great timing for you because it's just gone up to $80,000. Oh, that's great. That would be wonderful. What would you do? $80,000? I don't know. Probably put it on the house and take the kids

on a great holiday. Yeah, nice. There's a little bit of spending there. Yeah. You know, a mix of sensible and lavish. Yeah, you've got to have both. Exactly. All right, well, Maria, here is the secret sound. $80,000 cash is all yours if you can tell us what that is.

Okay, I'm going to guess that it's Gary closing his truck, closing the door, and his clothes getting caught and then ripping. Right, okay. Now, of course, referring to the video, if you haven't seen it, ZM Online, Instagram, Facebook. It's a what, a two-minute video, Gary? Yep, two minutes long. Of you going about your day

and in that video somewhere is a secret sound. Of course, a seven o'clock guest was opening the Jeep. It was. It was. So this is very different.

So it's closing and then I'm getting some clothes stuck in and it's ripping. And maybe that causes a little gasp. Maybe I'm shocked. God, I want to know what that gasp is.

That's the part of the secret sound that really throws me. Is it a gasp? Yeah, that's the most annoying part. Is it a gasp, Gary? Yeah, why don't you tell us if it's a gasp? Stop just making the cash prize more and just tell us if it's a gasp or not. Maria, that is also not the secret sound. Okay, thank you.

All right, thanks, Maria. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Friday Flashback. Imagine turning up to work on Friday and then everyone's like, it's your pack for Flashback Friday. Literally, imagine it. You're asking people to imagine a scenario they'll never face. Yeah.

I know. And also, it's not a surprise. It was mine last week. I know. You're next. Then I spitballed some ideas and everyone's like, ah. Ten minutes ago, Fletch was like, I'm not doing it. I'm just cancelling.

I'm just not doing it today. I'm not in the mood for this. You never are. Well, anyway, we'll come up with this is Anya's song. So if this is rubbish, we're throwing her under the bus. That also means if people love it, you don't get the credit. I like this song, so I was like, yes, let's do this. It's a great song.

And it was in the top 10 of most countries, if not the top 5 of most countries around the world, it was number three in New Zealand. Okay. The first 48 words of the song, Na. Does that give it away?

The first 48 words of the song, Na. Does that help? Na, na, na. Oh my God. Na, na, na, na. 48 words of the song. Nah. Does that help? Oh, my God. Nah, nah, nah, nah. 48 times. Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah.

It's your Friday flashback. Queen Stefani, Rich Girl with Eve. On to them. 48. There. I'd have all the money in the world if I was a wealthy girl. Think what that money could bring. I bought everything. Clean up, living in Westwood in my Galeano gown. No one just ever knew.

Hollywood mentioned if I could. Please vote me first. Cast in my fancy house in London town. All the riches, baby, won't mean anything All the riches, baby, bring what your love can't bring All the riches, baby, won't mean anything Don't even know what the baby loves and it's better than gold And I know you I was a rich girl Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na

See, I'd have all the money in the world If I was a wealthy girl If a man could test me Invest in my cash But we'd never ever end Cause I'd have all the money in the world If I was a wealthy girl I came before Harry, sugar girls too

Inspired me and they'd come to my rescue I'd dress them wicked, I'd give them names Love and your music, baby Hurry up and come and save me All the riches, baby Won't mean anything Thank you. And it's better than gold, no, no Come together all over the world From the hood to Japan, have a juke, ooh, girls What? It's all love, what? Give it up, what? Shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter

What? Come together all over the world From the hood to Japan, have a juke, ooh, girls What? It's all love, what? Give it up, what? Shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter, shouldn't matter What happened to my life turned upside down? Chicks got blue, y'all, ding, it's the second round Original track and ding, mmm

You know you can't buy these things, no See Stefani in the land, mom Rock the fetish, people, you know who I am Yes, now we got the style that's wicked I hope you can all keep up We climbed all the way from the bottom to the top Now we ain't getting nothing but love I was a rich girl

Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na See, I'd have all the money in the world If I was a wealthy girl You make it test me, impress me My cash flow will never ever end Cause I'd have all the money in the world If I was a wealthy girl Na-na-na-na-na-na- wealthy girl Na-na-na-na-na

Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Na-na-na-na-na-na Queen Stefani Eve on ZM.

Friday flashback today. Mixed bag. Just bear in mind, that was number three in the charts in New Zealand and a top five or ten song around the world and has actually had a slowdown resurgence on TikTok of late as well. Right. But it sounds weird slowed down. Because executive producer Anya was so invested in this.

She helped you choose. She's done a tally of good versus bad texts. It's 50-50. Okay, well that's on you, executive intern Anya. There's some savage burns. I would say the most savage burn that has ever been received for a Friday flashback song ever. Ugh.

You know how you write UGH. Ugh. This starts. This is on you, Anya. This text reads, I've had more satisfying pap smears than this flashback Friday. Wow. That's brutal.

That song was the equivalent of being up in the stirrups. Great. Tsk, tsk. Yeah, wow. Tsk. But there was great response as well. So let's just take this on the chin. It was 50-50.

Okay. Yeah, it was 50-50. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Am I a bad person? Okay. Here we go. It's a dude writes in today. He and his girlfriend are having an argument.

So I'm going to read you what he says and you have to decide if he is indeed a bad person with this moral conundrum. I don't want to wait it either way. Actually, that sounds like I'm waiting it. You know, like decide for yourself. Okay. I'm not saying either way. Well, that's why we do this segment. We need your help.

My girlfriend is mad at me right now, but I think I'm in the right. Basically, she was mad at me for not doing enough chores around the house. To be fair, she does do more than me. I do around 30% of the total household jobs. We've gone into percentages. Okay.

This is how serious this is. That's for required a list. But I also pay more of our expenses so I feel like she can contribute more to help make it equal. She didn't like that I said that and we got into

a big fight about it. I said if I do half of the chores, I would do half of the chores if she pays half of the bills. She was annoyed but agreed and I worked out that it'd be an extra $400 per month for her to make it equal. So last week I called a cleaning company

and I hired them to come once a week. They send out someone for $100 a visit and I've been cleaning up any dishes as soon as I'm done with them. I told her about the plan. She was furious. Said that we should both be spending the same time cleaning, but I don't have the desire or time to do it.

Am I a bad person for doing my half of the chores by hiring someone to do them for me? No. This is getting done. He's valuing his time. It's being done. It's getting done. And that's his... They're obviously cohabitating but have separate financials.

If he's planning it done, does she... Does she... She doesn't say... He doesn't mention what she does for a job. No. Is she working at all? It doesn't specify. Right, okay.

Because would that... Do you think that would sway you if she was at home all day not working? Yeah, well, it just depends on the scenario, I guess. Why is she not working? Because she can't be bothered? Or, you know. But then he might not have any time to do,

you've got to make time, don't you? I'm just trying to look at it from both sides here. You're saying no one has time. I have time to do chores. Like, everyone has time. Like, you're saying you've got no time to ever watch Netflix. Oh, yeah, there's always time to watch Netflix. There's always time.

Yeah. So, I think, I don't think it's very good in a relationship to be flexing who gets more money than someone else. No, you're just asking for trouble there. That is overall what I think she's probably upset about because someone's always going to earn more than someone else. No, you're just asking for trouble there. That is overall what I think she's probably upset about because someone's always going to earn more than someone else pretty much and you can't flex it because then, you know, that's... It's a douche move.

It is a douche move. Yeah. But that came to an agreement. No, that didn't. He decided to do it. No, no, no, but didn't they agree that he had to do his half of the chores and she was going to pay more? So he's like, well, I know these are what I have to do.

I'll just get somebody in to do it. But it's also the journey to get to that point. He said a lot of things that she's obviously going to be angry about. Oh, I know. And he went into percentages. I saw the markers right from the opening convo. Yeah. So I think it's also the journey of what he said to her

in this whole conversation has probably upset her quite a bit. But I think yes. Just because you're flexing your money in a relationship, it's not a good idea. So you think he's a bad person. This is what we want to ask you today. Is he a bad person? For doing my half of the chores by hiring someone to do them

for me. Vaughn, what are your thoughts? Yes or no? If they agreed that that was just how he had to do those chores. As long as they're done. As long as they're done, what's the problem? I mean, I don't necessarily agree with him flexing

his, you know, higher pay. Yeah. But I don't disagree with him hiring flexing his, you know, higher pay. Yeah. But I don't disagree with him hiring the cleaner. I think it's genius. If he doesn't want to do it, he's also saving money because she's, you imagine living in a flat. But what?

And you could afford to get a cleaner and to do your weekly chores at a flat. How good would that be? Yeah, but you don't have to be in a relationship with those people. You're a cohabitation. You're supposed to be like equals. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Even in the studio, Vaughan and I are arguing. I don't think we're arguing.

I've got a big stupid smile on my face. What did you just say? What did you just say? Oh, I've said a lot of things. I can't remember what I said. Okay, let's recap. Okay, so the boyfriend in this couple has messaged in and basically they had arguments about doing the chores.

Yeah. So he agrees that she does more than him. He says he does 30% of the total household chores. He's gone into percentages, but he also makes more money and pays more for the expenses. Right. I think we're really caught up on him making more money. And I'm not sure whether or not he uses this,

and people are saying that they've been with people who use this in a relationship all the time. Now, I don't know if this guy's using this all the time or if it's just a point that when you hear it, it's quite hard to ignore. Yeah, right. So he has since, instead of, because he doesn't want to do the chores,

he's paying $100 a visit for someone to do his part of the chores. His 30%. So he worked out she'd have to pay $400 more a month if they were going to be even keel for splitting the costs of living there, right? Yeah. But that didn't happen. It doesn't sound like it. Okay.

So now to do his chores, he's like, I'm just going to pay someone a hundie to come in and do this. Who is the sugar daddy? He sounds like he's got a lot of money. It sounds like there's a lot. Like you can't, if you're not happy with the balance of the relationship, you need to have a grown up conversation about it. But this is why it's important when you meet someone and you're thinking about the long term. Is this person some kind of OCD and they've got to have everything clean and meticulous?

If the answer is yes, then marry them instantly. And they'll do it all. Because they won't be able to handle your terrible cleaning. Yeah. Is that not the best plan in the world ever? Yeah. Yeah. That's what I did.

Exactly. Another piece of advice that you've given many people, Megan, is don't get good at something you don't want to do. You don't want to do. Yeah. Hence the cleaning. Yeah. But a lot of people have an opinion on this. Melanie, is he a bad person? I think he's a bad person.

I think it's more the effort that he's putting, that she wants him to put into it, and because he's paying for it now, it's offended her. It's not about the money for her. She wanted him to clean. Yeah, because you've got this place together. Yeah, it's your home. It's your home. You're creating this space together and he's not putting any effort into

keeping it. What if he's work? We don't know his work. He might work longer hours. He might not work longer hours but he might just work to the point where he's like well, I'll just spend some of my disposable income on getting someone to clean because I hate cleaning. Who likes cleaning? I don't like cleaning. But do you want to be like, he's just like, I don't like that particular responsibility.

I just won't do it. That's not really how life works. That's how I've gotten to here. I don't want to do that and I won't. Melanie thinks you're cool. Anna, is he a bad Melanie thinks you call Anna. Is he a bad person or not? Anna.

Is this me? Yes. It's Hannah, sorry. Oh, Hannah. Okay. I don't think he is. Okay. I think essentially he was paying $400 a month for her to do 20% extra cleaning,

and now he's paying someone else to do 50%. She does 70% of the cleaning. So she's still doing, it's important to note, she's still doing 70% of the cleaning. He's just paying for the 30%. Well, so he's getting ripped off. My partner, so I work three days, and my partner pays essentially all the bills I just pay for food. Yeah. And I do like, I do all the cleaning because, you know.

Yeah. But has he ever said to you, oh, come on, you're only working three days. You should do all the cleaning. He doesn't flex like that. He does, but he mostly jokes it. Many a truth I thing said in jest. Yeah. Right.

But if I whinge and say that I'm doing all the cleaning, he'll do some, but he'll do a crap job. He's smart. And then it makes me want to do it anyway. Yeah, good. See, this is what I'm saying. You've got to meet someone like you. Yeah, exactly.

Hey, thanks for your call, Hannah. Sarah, is he a bad person? I don't think so. I think he's at least getting a cleaner and so it'll probably be done at a better standard anyway. Yeah. That's why people are texting me again saying, look, if my husband had to pay someone to A, get it done,

or B, just do a decent job of his thing, I'd be more than happy to have him do it. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Whereas my husband doesn't want to do any of the chores but refuses to let me get a cleaner. So I think at least he's got a cleaner. Wow, okay. But your husband won't clean.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He hates it, but doesn't understand why I want to clean it. Yeah. It's not a walk in the park. It's not like anyone really loves it. No, yeah. Well, no, no. I don't think he understands that I just do it because we have to do it,

not because it's like the most exciting part of my day. Okay. Sarah, thanks for your call. Some text messages. This is a real can of worms, isn't it? Yeah. And support for the dude is coming from all sides of it. Now, if you had to finalise some kind of percentage here,

what would you say? Is he a bad person? I've got to say it'd be pretty close. It's 50-50. It must be getting really 50-50. Someone said, I pay for everything and do nothing. It's 50-50. It must be 50, getting really 50-50. Someone said, I pay for everything and do nothing. That's our agreement.

And that's cool because that's what they've agreed upon. Yeah, and if everyone's happy, then that works. Yeah. Somebody said,

we got a cleaner on a trial basis. Three years later, do you still call it a trial basis? And we got it because my husband hated cleaning so much.

He was like, I'm just going to get a cleaner. Because I know flatmates that have gone in on a cleaner and it And we got it because my husband hated cleaning so much. He was like, I'm just going to get a cleaner. Because I know flatmates that have gone in on a cleaner and it's actually not that much if you've got a big flat of four or five people once a week. Somebody else said when they were going to uni, they couldn't afford to go flatting and their parents said you can stay at home for free,

but what we need you to do is chores, cleaning and stuff. So they just hired a cleaner and it was still way less than rent. Yeah, right. Anywhere. So it was the way to go. So on our Instagram poll, is he a bad person? 65% said no.

Oh, that doesn't fly with me. Seriously. It's not so much the end result. It's the journey he got to get there. What he said to her on the way. I'm like, that just doesn't, that's me. Seriously. It's not so much the end result. It's the journey he got to get there. What he said to her on the way. I'm like, that just doesn't, that's not what you do in a relationship. I'm just too tight to pay for a cleaner. I was totally having a cleaner doing my chores.

I clean. All right. I clean good. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan The podcast It's time for Fact of the day Day

Day Day Day Today's fact of the day Is about perfume. Parfum. Eau de parfum. Yeah, which one are you talking about?

Parfum or toilet? Eau de toilette. What's the difference? One's watered down. Yeah, toilette. Is it? Toilette is watered down. You think they use a little bit of toilet water.

Toilette is cheaper than parfum. And you spray it in your toilet if you have one you don't like. I've got two I don't like. They were gifts and they're in my toilet. It hurts my feelings. The one in our toilet at the moment, I actually purchased for Charlotte. Is it the musky one? No, no, no.

It's one I bought for her. Oh, okay. That she didn't like. Oh, what? I know, I gave her a gift. The recent one for the birthday. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Okay.

Oh, gosh, no. No, this is one, no. Okay. Oh, gosh, no. Now, this is one from a previous birthday. Oh, right. It's just faded a little bit over time. The one I gave her for the birthday this year might make an appearance in the toilet and say 2022. Okay, right. I should have known.

You know when you buy someone a perfume and they use it for a bit and then they stop using it? Yeah. They obviously have grown sick of it or didn't really like it in the first place so they just tried to cushion the blow. So which one? Why do they water it down?

Which one have I? Because it was cheap then. The one that I like. I do toilet. But a lot of guys' fragrances are toilette because you sweat the parfum. You sweat it off. It's harder to find a parfum. For men.

For guys, they do it with toilet. To a higher body temperature. Well, today's fact of the day is the breakdown of a perfume cost. Okay. Now, this used average perfumes in the market. the breakdown of a perfume cost. Okay. Now, this used average perfumes in the market. This was done by Daily Finance. Okay. And to the breakdown of a $100, three and a half ounce bottle of celebrity perfume.

Right. So this was kind of an average of all the perfumes. And what makes up that $100 that you're paying for? Oh, okay. Okay? Here we go. First off, the bottle. Bottles on average cost about $6.

The glass bottle. Which is crazy, right? You think about that. And some of them are pretty elaborate. And the other thing about this being good flat on 100 is that you can think about it in percentages as well. Oh, yeah.

6%. 6% of a perfume is the bottle. Okay. But that also, the bottle does sell. Yeah, the bottles are always bougie, aren't they? Yeah, like that high heel one I got bottle. Okay. But that also, the bottle does sell. Yeah, the bottles are always bougie, aren't they? Yeah, like that high heel one

I got recently. Yes. Carolina Herrera. Jean Paul Gaultier. They had the torso, don't they? The torso, yeah. That sold some.

Yeah. And Diesel had the fist. Yep. Cool. Do you remember when Diesel, the Diesel, I'm just trying to think of other like,

iconic bottles. Well, there's your Britney Spears one behind, Sephardt neutraliser. They're all bulbs, aren't they? That's a bulb. That's a bulb. Yep. And that would be $6.

That's not the bougiest bottle in the world, but it was ceramic, I believe. Oh, right. At the bottom of it's ceramic. So $6. So that's $6. Packaging. This is the packaging around the bottle, the box it might come in. $4.

Okay. Well, that might be because recently for Indy's birthday, This is the packaging around the bottle The box it might come in $4 Okay Well that might be Because recently For Indy's birthday We bought her Ariana Grande perfume Right Cute Yeah I know

She's Yeah that was quite confronting Buying your daughter perfume She's growing up The woman in the chemist's warehouse Is like It's alright mate Why are you crying

I'll be like I'm gonna leave you $4 for the packaging Okay $4 for the packaging The Okay. $4 for the packaging. The marketing, $8. Okay. The marketing, so that's your advertising, your billboards, your TV, your bus shelters, all of those.

So we've used 18 of our 100. Yeah, good for you. I've been doing math. Good for you. Good math. Sales commission, $6. Is that to whoever sells it? Yes.

The store, like farmers or whatever Well no Because that would be the retailers portion This is a sales commission Apparently a lot of people that sell fragrances Work on a commission Right The licensing fee is $4

So that's effectively what they're paying The celebrity Ariana Grande Ariana Grande in this case For her name, her likeness, her brand Yep How much? $4 so so 4%.

Okay. The manufacturer's overhead is massive. It's $15. Okay. So that's 15%. That's factories, upkeep, all the employees on the way to it. The manufacturer's profit, 15. The retailer's overhead, 2525 And the retailers profit $15

So comparatively So you'll work out There's $2 left That's how much it costs to make The actual perfume itself Oh my god Distilled water What?

Alcohol And flavourants What the hell? Add up to 2% Of the total cost Of a bottle of perfume So what about So if you took in

Your own jar Yeah And said Just pour it in here Don't tell me who Don't tell me what celebrity a bottle of perfume. So what about madness? So if you took in your own jar and said, just pour it in here. Don't tell me who, don't tell me what celebrity, just pour it in there. What about some of those

Tom Ford ones that are like, how much are those? $400. $400. He's laughing all the way to the bank. So you would think

the $2 would be about the cost regardless, right? Because there's nothing, unless there's something in there that's a rare earth element that's so much harder to come by. It doesn't matter if it's the same amount of the liquid, it would be $2 regardless of how expensive it is. I think everything else would just go up.

Good Lord. So today's fact of the day is when you buy a bottle of perfume, the perfume itself costs about $2. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Well, we announced a couple of days ago the news that McDonald's were releasing their 50, I was going to say 50kg nugget packs, 50 nugget packs that you meant to share. And with that, the announcement that the Szechuan sauce, made famous by Rick and Morty, would be released in New Zealand.

Now, that was on Wednesday morning, that source, or was it Thursday? Yesterday. Wednesday. No, it was Wednesday. The source was Wednesday? Or was the announcement? Anyway.

It doesn't matter. It was Tuesday. It doesn't matter. Was it Monday? I'm going to say the source came out Wednesday. Saturday. And already that source, because I think McDonald's said it would work out to be about one sauce

for every 25 New Zealanders. That's a lot of shed dipping. But that did not hold back people. And a lot of restaurants were struggling with supply. And a lot of people snapping up those sauces. And they were already yesterday appearing on Trade Me for ridiculous amounts of money. Well, there's...

Because this happened in America, didn't it? It's never been here before, has it? But in America, the stories over the years of the sources going for like thousands on eBay. Yeah. It was originally with Mulan. The animated Mulan was when it came out with their Happy Meal because it's a... I mean, you can probably tell by Sichuan,

from the Sichuan province. It's a Chinese sauce. 39 current listings on Trade Me. Okay. $20 for one pottle. $150 for another. $100, but it's got free shipping. Buy now $800.

Bidding starting significantly lower. One for $1.50. Are they all buy nows or have people actually bid on those? Uh, those aren't all buy nows. No, those are ones that's a $10 reserve met that's got bids on it. Wow. So some of them have bids on it. Some of them are a buy now, but also have current active auctions going with them as well.

Why don't they bottle it and sell bottles? I don't know, but I took it upon myself, because if you Google, like, sauces and stuff you like, they even do this with, if you might have a favourite hot sauce, but they don't have it in the country you're in, you can Google, like, copycat recipes. Oh, yeah. And I found a five-star McDonald's Sichuan sauce copycat recipe.

Yeah. You should bottle it and sell it. It's one step ahead of you. I've ordered a, because the Sichuan peppers. Are they Sichuan? It's a pepper. Pepper. Okay.

Yeah, it's a peppercorn. Okay. Now, it's the husk of that that gives the flavor that everybody wants. Right. You buy the, like, you know how you buy a peppercorn and it's the inside of the pepper? Yep. It's been de-husked? Yep.

Well, in this one, it's actually the husk of it because it's more closely related to lime trees and the citrus family than it is chillies. Because, of course, chillies and all those,

they grow on plants, but this is an actual tree, an actual shrub, and the peppers grow on that. And so you're making your own. And so I've ordered some, and I've also ordered online a tree. So I'm going to plant a tree. And go into full production.

So I'm going to go into full production of the Sichuan sauce. You just bulk ordered some Sichuan peppers online. Yeah. And I found a place that will sell me a Sichuan pepper tree. And I've placed an order there. So you haven't made this sauce yet, but what if you go to all this? In for a penny, in for a pound, I think Sal Gibigari said before.

And no one sums that up better than me when I get my idea that I want to do something without having trying even do it. Well, good luck with that. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. This weekend, I'm popping off to the capital city. It's a lads, lads, lads, lads,

but lads weekend. Yeah, but there'll be ladies there as well. But like, yeah, still like my mate whose house we're going to, his partner and all those people. And friends. It's just that my wife's not coming. So lads. Labelled lads weekend., a mate of ours, you may remember, we talked about that we were peer-pressuring him into flying from England to New Zealand to attend a housewarming and then having to fly home. Just for the weekend. A big peer-pressure,

because this would have cost him $1,000. And he said it wasn't happening. Yeah, it would have cost him way more than that. Way more than that. A couple of thousand. Yeah. So, there was a lot of peer-pressuring. And he said yesterday, or maybe the day before, he said, I'm coming.

And he checked in on Facebook because you're friends with him. I saw this. I saw the check-in at Changi Airport today. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he checked in at Heathrow and then he was like, damn delays, checked in at Heathrow again. And then obviously, and then he's checked in at Changi Airport in Singapore and sent us some photos of how empty the airport is.

But I believe it's a huge ruse. He's not coming. He's lying. Yeah. Because that photo that he sent, did you reverse image search that on Google? Because that looked like a real newsy stock footage. So I reverse image searched that photo and no, no matches. Oh, okay.

And I used a couple of different ways to reverse image searched that photo and I could, no, no matches. Oh, okay. And I used a couple of different ways to reverse image search that. Then I don't know if he got that off because it's not a great quality image. He might have got it off somebody's Instagram story and then cropped it. Right. Have you checked, like, what else has he said? So this is what I've just been, he's been telling us what flight he's on because he's obviously researched what flights leave when and what's been cancelled and stuff like that.

Because he's, I'll tell you, I'll give him one thing. He's always known how to dedicate himself to a big old bullshit. Yeah. Yeah, right. Okay. That's why you're friends. Yeah. We appreciate that about each other.

I was sending messages a couple of hours ago when his flight would have been in transit between Singapore and Sydney. Yep. And in WhatsApp, you can flick across and see who read it at what time. Oh, yep. Okay. Which can get you in trouble sometimes. But sure.

When you've read a message but you pretend you didn't get it. And he read it when he would have been in the air. Now, it was at that stage that I Googled what kind of plane flies between Singapore and Sydney on QF82. Yep. And it's an Airbus A330. Yep. Is that right? That's right. A330.

A330. And I said, do they have in-flight Wi-Fi? And they are capable of having in-flight Wi-Fi, yet I've looked at Qantas. Now, this is the airline that he was flying. Qantas International do not have Wi-Fi. Right. It says domestic Qantas flights have Wi-Fi.

International Qantas flights won't have Wi-Fi until 2021. This flight includes the A380 and the 787. So he's lying. As well as international versions of the Air the A380 and the 787. So he's lying. As well as international versions of the Airbus A380. So he wouldn't have had in-flight Wi-Fi. What if that plane just had it early? Or if it was

one of those ones where, you know, they code share. So it might not have been a modest flight that they were on. Have you just messaged his wife and just asked if he's left or not? No, because that would be, that would be cheating. Oh my gosh. To ask her directly

if he has left would be cheating because you've got to find out how to add him in his lie without using the one person that would be. But this is bad

because he's getting your friend's hopes up who's having the housewarming. I know, one of our friends who's from Hamilton, Callum,

he's going down, he messaged me, just me, not the whole group. He's like, is he coming? I'm so confused. Is he coming? I'm like, I don't think so. Well, now we're all invested. I need to know.

Yeah. I'll keep you up to date. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hit music lives here. ZM.