ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan’s Podcast - 16th June 2021

Episode Date: June 15, 2021

Cheating  Top 6: Spice Girls Song  Sliiiiide into the DM's!  Inspired Unemployed  Jacinda Ardern  Vaughans Perfume PurchaseSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche Vaughan and Megan show. It's thanks to McCafe. What the fuck did you call it that for? The Fleeche Vaughan and Megan show. The Fleeche Vaughan and Megan show. You just say Fleeche Vaughan and Megan. You don't stipulate that it's a show. Now I feel like a clown. What am I to you? Some sort of big time woman.

That felt really weird. Whatever, morning crew. The Fleeche Vaughan and Megan morning crew show. The Fleeche Vaughan and Megan morning zoo. The Fleeche Vaughan and Megan radio program show. Wagwater Megan Morning Zoo. The Fletchwater Megan Radio Program Show. Waggy. No, that's all right, though. You've got that now.

When I just pause, I was reading something else. It's thanks to McCafe. Buy five McCafe coffees. Get one free on the Maccas app. I won't be surprised if they then pull their association to the show. We've just been post-show free this. We've just been doing the Test your typing skills

Livechat.com typing speed test This was frustrating I gave up and closed the window Now You gave up and closed the window Because this was more during the typing test I was saying it out loud I don't know if that might have been

Uncookedant against the rules I've got long nails I didn't even want to attempt that Because sometimes I stuff the keys up In the producer's booth Producer Jared Grandchampion For what percentage did you get? 98% accuracy?

100% and 66 words He can type real fast And look at something else Like he does that pretty cool thing Years of Chatting up chicks online Just tell them you can do that And they'll be puttying your hands

Chatting up chickadees online Executive intern on you, you came second What did you get? 57 words, 90% accuracy Can you look away and type? No, I can She doesn't chat up enough chicky babes You're chatting up the chicky babe 57 words, 90% accuracy. Can you look away and type? No. I can. She doesn't chat up enough chicky babes. Because I did me...

You're chatting up the chicky babes. Mavis speaking and typing. And that's what the, on the F and the J, that's what the little nodules are, the little bumpy bits. So that's where you put your little fingers. No wonder the chicky babes are putty in your hands too. Oh my God, they melt. The chicky babes.

So then the person who lost can Carwen on the social media desk, which she's at the social media desk. She should know. She should be our most proficient typer. I'm going to blame this on the fact that I'm so young that I didn't have to take typing at school. Ouch. You know how that's like a class?

What did you do? Did you do dictation or something at school? All right, put your headphones on. Come on. Did you do dictation at school? There must have been typing. No, but you just knew how to type. Yeah. That's so fascinating. All right, you put your headphones on. Come on. Did you do dictation at school? There must have been typing. No, but you just knew how to type. Yeah.

That's so fascinating. Oh, you just grew up typing. We didn't have a typing class. You just do like computer studies or whatever. I did. I'm so old that the class was called typing. Oh my God. And it was on typewriters, not computers.

No, it wasn't. We were also not really well off school. Yeah, you were also writing special codes for the World War II effort, weren't you? Yeah, yeah. Punch cards. We were out to beat the Nazis. And we did it, goddammit. We did it.

With punch cards and an old typing with Mrs. Winton. Mrs. Winton. Mrs. Winton, yeah. And then we went to a party at somebody's house and Mrs. Winton was there.

It was her house. Oh, weird. Yeah. Went through school not knowing that this guy's mum who had exactly the same last name as him, that they were related. God, he kept that quiet. He did.

It was ruthless when you went to school with someone whose parent was a teacher. It was horrible. Like, why wouldn't you send your kids to a different school? Admin? Like, that sounds like a great idea, but admin? Yeah. I guess you give them a ride every day to work. Yeah.

Slash school. Yeah, makes sense. Oh, he's grown up to look a lot like his mum. I just found him on Facebook. Is he a receptionist? Uh, no. Okay. Hell of a typer, though.

Okay. Good. Still all these years later. ZM. Hit music. Lives here. Fleshforn and Megan. The podcast.

Morning. Whoa, I was just likeuna Megan. The podcast. Morning. Well, I was just like, what day is this? Wednesday. Wednesday. Just checking the clock for you. Wednesday, the 16th of June. Yeah. I don't want you guys to be intimidated.

Yep. But I did set the day record for the punching machine at an arcade last night. I saw that. I rocked in with an absolute thunder punch. Yeah. But here's what I learned about this. Watching other people hit the machine. Yeah.

The top, you know how it says like top score. I'm talking about one of those things at the arcade you pull down and then you punch as hard as you can and it measures how hard you punched it. It's like a hanging ball sack. Yeah. A punching bag.

Well, bam. And as people, like kids had a go, when their score was way below the top score, the top score came down. So it's not a top score. It's like an average. Oh, lame.

It's rigged. So did you just let a whole lot of kids go and then beat it? And then beat their average. Look, and that doesn't mean I'm the toughest, but it means I'm the smartest. Did they see you beat them? Of course they did. I made them all watch.

Saw one and I was like, okay, kid, you've had your swing. Stand there and watch. No, next kid, next kid, next kid. Let's get this average down and then I'm going to rock it. So you're on an absolute high on a Wednesday. Oh, God, absolutely. Alpha male high. Watch out.

Your chance to win cash this morning at 7 o'clock and 8 with the box, all thanks to Marvel Studios' Black Widow. $20,000 is inside. We just need that four-digit pin from you. There's a 7 in there. We know that. All the closer we've had, ZM Instagram, ZM Online for the guesses as well that were wrong.

The Prime Minister joins us this morning at 10 to 8 for our monthly chat. So we'll hit her with the hard questions. Yep. As per? Like, oh my God, what are you getting married? No. I don't know. I don't know what hard questions.

Electric vehicles. Will she give me one? Well, she's going to give you a rebate, she said. Bike lane over the Harbour Bridge. Oh, yep. Can I ride my motorbike on it? I don't have a motorbike. Oh, I do. I give you a rebate, she said. Bike lane over the Harbour Bridge. Oh, yep. Can I ride my motorbike on it? I don't have a motorbike. Oh, I do.

I've got a farm bike. Can I ride my quad bike over it? I doubt it. Can I ride my petrol-powered, oil-leaking quad bike over it? I doubt it. Right. I doubt it. All right, she's on at 10 to 7.

The top six coming up. Yeah, today's top six. The top six names for Spice Girls' song. Apparently, they're going to release a new song. First time since 2007, right? Yeah.

To celebrate 25 years of the Spice Girls. Yeah, wannabe. Yeah. So I've got the top six names for that Spice Girls song. Alright, next on the show, Toddlers Screen Time.

Are your toddlers watching too much or not enough? Or do you just need them to shut up and give you five seconds, please? Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Happy 12 year anniversary to me and my adult chickenpox. Yeah. We're just reliving that on as a Facebook memory in the studio.

Thanks, Facebook memories. Constantly telling me what happened however many years ago. It's great. I love it. Yeah. It says, I can't believe Fletcher's adult chicken pox. What is wrong with him? Is it yours?

Oh, it was horrible. It was horrible. And it's really bad to get chicken pox as an adult. You're sterile, right, as a guy? Yeah. Oh, my God. No children for you. Can I not have children?

Yes! Hmm. Well, if you did have children, this is what we're here to talk about now. Screen time for toddlers. Good segue from you. Yeah, not bad, eh? Keep it coming. Keep the applause coming.

So toddlers, that's children aged between walking and school. Okay, yeah. They're considered toddlers. One in ten toddlers are getting three hours of screen time a day. Oh, my God, Megan, stop putting Bastion in front of the iPad. I have done that. It keeps them quiet. Mate, this is all for a start.

This is a lie. It's definitely more than one in 10 toddlers. It's more than 10% of two-year-olds. And then two-year-olds specifically are spending 10%, are spending three or more hours a day on it. In front of a screen. Yeah. Does that mean an iPad or a phone, or does that mean a TV as well?

Could it be any screen? Just screen full stop. Okay. Yeah. But it's iPads and stuff, because if you've got two, they can be watching different things and everybody's happy. They're annoying little buggers. I can see why you just put them in front of a TV or a screen.

It's exhausting already, like, having to entertain them 24-7. So just, like, if you need to go to the toilet, you're like, just watch RuPaul's Drag Race. It's so many colours and stuff. It's probably not what most kids are watching. Not that there's anything wrong with it. It's so colourful and he's just, like, enthralled. Watch the colours

Yeah right okay Yeah I mean not that there's anything wrong with your toddler Having a progressive view on gender fluidity Absolutely not And you know getting in touch with the drag queens Yeah Two thirds of children age two

Had one hour or less of screen time per day And then the other parents are lying about how great they are and how they never put their children in front of a screen and why would they put that toxic rot into their brains and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But yeah, it just does get, I try to limit it. But lately, like, the weather's been rubbish. It's like, yeah.

Well, they've literally said to me, what are we supposed to do? I was like, I don't know. I'm playing Ratchet and Clank. Find something to do? I was like, I don't know. I'm playing Ratchet and Clank. Find something to do. You're on a screen. I'm like, yeah, but I got up early this morning. You get a job. Yeah, it's a bit hard to tell them off when you're being a hypocrite.

That's the best hypocritical part of it. As the parents who are like big anti-screens people, you'll look and they'll be like on the gram, just having a scroll on the gram. It's like, yeah, okay, well, they're just doing what they've seen you doing now. So, yeah. Let them have their darn screen time. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

Well, there are allegations that students are cheating in online exams. But can't you cheat in online exams if you're doing them online? Well, you can Google answers, right? It was like those open book tests. It was like, now this is just testing how good you are at cheating, really. Well, yeah, researching on the fly.

Yeah. Or cheating as it's always been known. This is from an Auckland, a University of Auckland student who has blown the whistle saying that students are using anonymous chat services, calls and messaging apps to cheat on exams. So end of semester exams are moved to online in case of another lockdown.

But the system is the exams are unmonitored and entirely trust-based. I will now cross to trust expert Carl Peter Fletcher for his saying on trust. I never trust anyone ever, full stop, ever. You just can't trust anyone ever. No, humans can't be trusted. It's an absolute fact of life. And this student

is saying, well, everyone's cheating. I don't want all my hard work undone because I'm not cheating. Who's that narc? Yeah. It's a real... We got ourselves a narc. So apparently the university is

investigating the allegation. It's been apparently raised before, but this student says nothing was done. And yeah, they're using apps like Discord, which you always hear, like, I think gamers use. Producer Jared, gamers use Discord. I've only ever heard of it, and Trump supporters using it. And QAnon organising rallies on Discord. Gamers, Trump supporters, nerds, pervs, just all sorts. Pervs?

What are pervs doing on it? I've heard through the grapevine that OnlyFans people can chuck their links up on Discord. Ah, right. Okay. What, just kind of throw to their OnlyFans? Yeah. That's like, you know, you take't take, you take Moses to the mountain. Is that the saying?

Well, no, I think what... Like, you've already got all those people there ready to, you know, support Trump and pay $20 a month for feet pictures, so you might as well go to them. Yeah, I think what would be a better analogy is you're that person at the supermarket giving out a little free bit of meat on a toothpick. The lady in the samples kiosk. is you're that person at the supermarket giving out a little free bit of meat on a toothpick. The lady in the samples chaos. The lady's in the samples chaos. The student in the samples chaos.

Just like, here, have a little tiny bit of processed meat. Yeah, and then you log out and you log in with another, and you get another free sample. Sure. But apparently the university, a spokeswoman has said that they have mechanisms in place to detect cheating. And that markers have been asked to be on the lookout

for kind of answers that are very similar. Because apparently people are saying on the app during the exam, how are you guys answering these questions? Right. But wouldn't you not want to help? I mean, you'd help out your friends, but wouldn't you not want to help out so that you get the highest marks in the class?

Unless you're being paid. Or you, like, it's a lot of stuff to cover, and you're specifically covering topic A, and they're doing B, so you're the A expert, they're the B expert. But then there's a lot of admin involved in this. Yeah. Just go in, take a leap out of my book, go in blind and bluff your whole thing. Bluff the whole thing. Yeah, I mean, that's working in your life, but not everybody's that lucky to just.

I know doctors that are on Google. Yeah, you can't do that as a medical professional. I know a doctor that just Googles stuff. Dentists, they just drill out the brown bits. You know, I know a lot of people that are in professional. Surgeons. Yeah, they're just like, what's that but there? What do you reckon that but there is?

And then the nurses like that's the kid and they'll be like good work nurse leave that there because we are here for the the nurses like

liver bingo which one's the liver and that's why you didn't last more than two weeks in med school with that and a few

you know yeah a few law suits ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan the podcast a recruitment agency With that and a few, you know. Yeah. A few law suits. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. A recruitment agency has done a big survey and it's revealed that a third of Kiwi professionals are planning to quit their jobs in the next year. Professionals?

To go travelling. What is that? Professionals. No, just because they want better pay is the main reason. Oh, right. So they'll quit their jobs and then get another better job. Yeah, in theory. In theory, yeah.

Or do some soul searching. Yeah. And then realize soul searching is quite expensive if you want to do it somewhere that looks good on Instagram. You can't pay the rent with soul searching, can you? But yeah, they don't think they're paid enough. And basically they say that they've been helping their businesses through COVID.

They stuck around for the recovery and stuff, but now ready for a pay rise. Now, 39% of employers said that they were, no, actually three quarters of employers said they were going to give people pay rises over the next year, but it would be 3% or under. Right. Okay. Which is not satisfactory. Yeah. I don't know how you're supposed to...

But are we recovered? That's what I was about to say. Businesses are still trying to recover, right? I don't know enough about business to say. Yeah, graphs. Lots of graphs. I know they're graphs. Yeah. Interest rates.

Yeah. Of course, the official cash rate affected by interest. We're out of our depth here. And back to you at the news desk. Yeah, okay. Do you want some more stats then? Yep. Yep, stats are great.

Stats are great. I love stats. You can hide behind stats. We can. You can really hide behind stats. Around 50% said they were unsatisfied with their current employer. That's half. Yeah. It is. Two in five

said their work wasn't providing new challenges. So not just the bad pay, but they felt like they couldn't progress. But like, I just don't know if you quit. I mean, if you've got another job to go to. Oh yeah, I don't. You know when people quit and they're like,

I'm just going to go find something. I'm like, that scares the hell out of me. I'm like, you've got to find a job and then quit. Yeah. Quit like ballsy. You're jumping onto it before you just jump into the ocean. Yeah. I'd be like, no, I couldn't do that.

Yeah. Right. But lots of people are looking to do it. Apparently so. Quit your jobs in the next year. Flesh, but lots of people looking to do it. Apparently so. Quit their jobs in the next year. Fleshfauna Megan, the podcast, ZM. Blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah.

This is the Top Six. Hello. Welcome to the Top Six. Today's Top Six dealing with the fact that the Spice Girls are releasing their first new music since 2007. All five of them are going to be on the track. Victoria will probably be turned right down, but she'll be there. She doesn't need them.

She doesn't need it. She's got enough money and David. And the kids. And the kids. And the kids. And the fashion empire. I have a question. Is this recorded recently or recorded back in the day?

No, no, no. It's like a brand new song. Oh, wow. It's being released as part of the... Oh, no. It is a demo of a previously unreleased ballad written by the Spice Girls and Wannabe co-creators Richard Biff Stannard and Matt Rowe.

So it's not new. A slow, soulful song It was thought to have been Never released Because it was considered Too racy for the audience At the time If it was good though They would have released it

Let's be honest Yeah Okay so then Apparently a couple of them Have been asked to Add some vocal element to it A couple of them I'm guessing it's not her.

47. Mel C, 47. Emma Bunton, 45. Geri Horner. She got married, eh? Because she was Geri Halliwell. 48. And Mel B, 46.

Did you see Mel C didn't pay her storage locker fees and she got storage ward? Sporty Spice. You know in storage wards how they sell off the storage lockers. Somebody snapped up her storage locker and put all of her mementos on eBay. All of her Spice Girls stuff.

She's like, I want it back. I want it back. Why is she not paying for that? I don't know. Or forgot about it and fell through the gaps. Well, I've got the top six names of the next Spice Girls song. Okay. So if this goes well and they get back together and release another song here in 2021.

Okay. Our number six on the list of the top six names for the new Spice Girls song. Number six, Two Become One. I mean, two for the price of one with this voucher because I'm a mom now and we might have been rich, but I still love a voucher. Who doesn't love a two for the price of one with this voucher because I'm a mom now and we might have been rich but I still love a voucher. Who doesn't love a two for one? Everyone loves a two for one. I could like win a lotto and be

a bajillionaire and I'd still use a two for one voucher. GFB's awesome as a two for one guy. And happy hours. Two for one. Oh my god I love it. No doubt about it. Number five on the list of the top six names for the new Spice Girls songs. Who do you think you are? But this time it screamed at their teenage kids.

Oh, yeah. Because their kids are being ratbags and running around and... Who do you think you are? This isn't your house. My house, my rules. Number four on the list are the top six names to the new Spice Girls song. I'll rest VP to my upcoming 50th. Or say you'll be there.

Or not be there. If you could just let us know that it'd also be really great. Number three on the list of the top six names for the new Spice Girls song. Mama, I love you. Mama, I care. But you've got to move into

a retirement village, a Ryman retirement village. You can't live with us anymore. You're just becoming a little bit like, you're overstayed your welcome. It's time to shift you on. Number two on the list of the top six names for the new Spice Girls songs. Spice up your life,

but make sure you have quickies at hand because you know how spicy food gives you reflux at your age. You know? They might have had A stomach for a Spicy Vindaloo Vindaloo I was trying to get fancier That Jif

Is it Jifafal No I don't know Jifal Is it a curry I think You know I only do The butter chickens I only do the butter chickens

Yeah I need a spicy butter chicken Yeah Medium Medium No medium And number one on the list Of the top six Names for the new Spice Girls song,

given that they're all in their late 40s and it's 2021, wannabe, in bed. It's now nine o'clock and I'm tired. I just want to be in bed now. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. A real life hacker has revealed what you should stop doing online and she is a white hat hacker. A white hat hacker has revealed what you should stop doing online. And she is a white hat hacker.

A white hat hacker? Yeah. What is that? Is that like a group, anonymous or something? She says it's someone who is like hacking for good. An ethical hacker. So she gets paid by companies to hack them to expose their weaknesses before they get actually hacked. Right, so she's not hacking people to extort them for money.

No. Okay, right. But she's got a hacker name. Her name's Snow. I want to be a hacker just to get, like, a cool name. Oh, it comes from the origins of White Hat, Black Hat. It's from Westerns. Black Hats were always the bad guys.

Right. White Hats were always the good guys. I don't mean to, like, purr-purr your dreams of being a hacker, but you don't even know how to update stuff. Like, you're not... Often leave it. Yeah.

Yeah, you're pretty useless with computers, to be honest. I did have trouble getting back on the Wi-Fi recently. It was really difficult. Yeah, there's that. There's work to be done in that area. Yeah, well, she has listed off a few things that people should not do online. You feel like you know everything, but then she spells out some of these things and you're like, yeah.

Right, okay. So first of all, driver's licenses. So when people first get their license and they're very excited about it, they might put a picture online. Don't take a photo. Ah, look at my photo. Do not take a photo of your licence and post it online. Or you get that temporary one,

that temporary licence. You're like, ha ha, look, my licence is a handwritten piece of paper. Yeah, and includes personal information. And sometimes it has your home address on it. So don't be taking pictures of anything that includes your home address.

Okay. And she also said new homeowners. So, they take a celebratory picture of their new house. Yeah. It includes a geotag. And then without realising it, people can find out exactly where you are, where you're living. Yeah, right. And then also, if you're away on holiday and you've got a photo of your home, they know where you are and you're not at home.

I didn't even think about that. Yes, that too. Employees will often take selfies and pictures of their workplace with complete disregard for what is in the picture. So whether there's computer monitors, what's on them, voicemail passwords that could be taped to phones, information on whiteboards. There could be passwords written down. Oh, that's happened before. Where was it?

There was quite a famous one of a whiteboard in the background and the password was on the whiteboard. It was like a news story. It was pretty funny. Yeah, don't do that. And she said people should never post on social media without thinking. So ask yourselves these questions before you post. What information am I putting online?

What is in the background of my image? And if I wanted revenge on myself, how could I use this information against me? Yeah, I always check that my, you know, my balls aren't reflecting in a shiny surface. I cover my balls before I take photos. Always check that. Yeah. That's a thing, you know. Don't take a picture in your house when you're naked because you're reflecting off something.

Exactly. Double check that. Even non-reflective surfaces can magically become reflective. And she also said to think of security questions. So you know how you have to make backup security questions for your bank or something? Yeah. Don't make it anything that could easily be found on, say, your Facebook.

If someone could do a quick scroll through and find out an answer to one of your security questions on your Facebook. Oh, I've got a photo of my first pet, Bubbles, the cat. Oh, God, that's one of my questions. And Bubbles is wearing your favourite coloured collar, blue. Yeah. Damn it. Or you've got a picture of your first car-making model.

Yeah. In the town where you were born. And then your photo of your mum before she got married with her maiden name. That's the thing, you don't think about half of that. You throw back Thursday to a photo with your childhood hero. You just think, oh no one's going to hack me.

Like, what am I going to get from me? And then, yeah. I mean, they only want sometimes a little bit of money. Yeah, so you're listening to Waikato DHB. I think this was a fairly targeted break at you. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. I am the box.

But right now it's a chance to win cash. Shell joins us. Good morning, Shell. Good morning. All right, so. How are you guys. Shell joins us. Good morning, Shell. Good morning. All right, so. How are you guys? Good, good. $20,000.

It could be yours. Yeah, hopefully. It's only a four-digit pin that stands in the way of that cash. We know that there's a seven in there and it spells a word. Now, what word do you want us to try? Going for free. Free. F-R-E-E.

What? For? That's three, seven, three, three. Three, seven, three, three. So the seven's in there. Why? Why have you gone for free? Tell me. Tell me why. Tell me what you're thinking. I don't know.

Everybody loves free stuff. You are not wrong. You're not wrong. I thought you were going to say Everybody loves free stuff. You are not wrong. You're not wrong. I thought you were going to say everyone loves being free. Even if you don't have the right pen? You're not wrong. All right. Let's try.

Here we go. I'm going to push enter now. There's always next time. No, it's not. Shell, but we do have for you a double pass to Marvel Studios' Black Widow. It's in cinemas July 8th and streaming on Disney+, with premiere access July 9. Conditions apply.

Well done. Thanks, guys. Every wrong guest does pick up a double pass to Marvel Studios' Black Widow, and we will have another shot at 8 o'clock. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Slide into the DMs. Oh, here we go. You got out of this on maternity leave last time.

Did this, what, a month ago, two months ago? Right. I don't like this. It's too revealing. It's too personal for you. The dark horse of the show. People get to slide into the DMs and ask us questions. And we go now to Carween at the social media desk.

Good morning. Hello. Now, we put this up on our Instagram. Slide in. What questions have you got for the show? So, we're going to start off with a relatively easy one. Okay. Best dating advice

you could give your younger shelf? My younger shelf? Do you get to hold up books and pot plants? Probably don't speak with a mouth full of cheese. Yeah.

Don't put, you know, don't swing off it because it'll tear it off the wall and then you'll have a holder of place as well. Best,

yeah, I don't know. I don't know if my younger self would give, my younger self would give, my older self would give any great advice. I just really liked douchebags, so I guess, like, don't go for bad boys. That's the advice of me.

Right. Mine would be don't waste the money on wood-fired pizza. Oh my God. Unless you know that the person likes wood-fired pizza. Let it go, Vaughn. They might have been happy with a cheaper pizza alternative, such as a $5 Domino's. They might have been a location data rather than a meal. That was when you did go on that date with that girl ages ago

and waste that money on that wood-fired pizza. It was a lot of money for Vaughan Smith back then. Oh, it was a lot of money for Vaughan Smith. Yeah. And then there was no second date. Yeah. And you had to eat noodles for the rest of the week. Yeah, because I chose to Maybe you should just have been a better date. I don't think it was the pizza's fault. Maybe I did.

I talked about the pizza a lot. Maybe they would like to talk about things other than how expensive and great wood-fired pizza is. Yeah. So that would be my advice. Okay, next question. I said I didn't have any. I don't know. Look at me.

I'm still single. By choice. Well, actually, that's the next question. Is Fletch single? Every time, yes. Next question. Oh, yes, because? Every time, yes. Next question. Oh, yes, because you're like, oh, I wish I could find love. Yeah, I was.

Oh, man, I wish I wasn't single. Yeah. No. I hate this lonely life. Yeah. Yeah, it's terrible. I hate it. I hate not being answerable to anybody or anything at any time.

I'm so cold in my bed alone. Yeah. No, I've got a great duvet. I'm a good weighted duvet. In fact, if anything, I get quite hot and sweaty. Too warm. Under my duvet.

Yuck. Yeah. Well, that's not yuck, was it? Well, another Fletch question. This is good stuff. Why does Fletch go by Fletch and not Carl? I've wondered this because back in the day you were Carl

when I listened to you when I was a child and I heard you on radio. You were Carl back then? I was at school. I think it was just a thing in radio when I started in radio where you had to have a wacky nickname. And they said that Fletch sounded better than Carl. But people still called me Fletch. Yeah.

So I was like, oh, yeah, cool. Whatever. I never got a wacky nickname. Well, they tried to come up with one for Vaughn, but Vaughno, Veggie. Veggie didn't stick. Didn't stick. Vazza. Unfortunately.

Vazza and Fletch. I think Vaughn was just weird enough, though. Yeah. In Australia, they go all in for the nicknames. Flazza, Vazza, Mazza. For the radio shows. I was like, we'd be Flazza, Vazza, Mazza if we were in Sydney right now doing a radio show. I really want to be a Mazza.

You're a mazza. Yeah. Like a Mazda. Sure. Okay, our next question, slide into the DMs. How is Megan finding balancing work life and motherhood? Tiring. I don't get a lot of sleep.

But no, he's a good boy. He actually does sleep pretty well. Who, Andrew or Bastion? Because you made Andrew a lunch the other day. And you wrote him a little note in his lunch box. What was on his sandwich? I didn't pick him as a white bread guy. No, he wanted

Oh, go on. He wanted white bread as a treat. He was having, yeah, it was a treat because he was having a ham and mustard sandwich and he wanted white bread. So you had to buy a whole life of white bread. We'll pop that in the freezer because you won't get through that very quick. And then you made him a little like some nuts and then some like a muesli bar. It was like scroggin'.

It was his first day. So you made the lunch. I was under the impression that he made the lunch, you just wrote the note. I helped. I made the sandwich. You made the sandwich. Wow, cute. Wow, a little white bread sandwich.

Not wrapped in glad wrap either, which is good for the environment. No, it's a little sandwich container, reusable. Yeah. Okay, next question. Slide into the DMs. What was it like when you changed stations and couldn't be on air for three months? Lovely. Oh, my God.

Amazing. God damn bliss. Was it three air for three months? Oh, amazing. God damn bliss. Was it three months or four months? Nah, four. That was phenomenal. If you can ever repeat that, that's the dream. There's a thing in contracts called gardening leave. And we didn't know this was even a thing.

It's for competitive industries where, you know, they don't want you to easily go to the opposition. And like share secrets and stuff, like they have secrets. You have to stand down for three months. And get paid. Yeah, I lived in Columbia for two months. How great was that? Yeah, and some people are like, oh, no, I just want to work.

I love this industry. Oh, pfft, pfft. No way, baby. No, yeah, if they're going to pay you to be on holiday, they're absolutely jealous. Oh, my God. Anyone listening now that's done gardening leave is like, I hear your sister.

Get her done. Yeah. Megan, if you had to get rid of either Fletch or Vaughn, who would you choose? Oh, my God. It depends on the day. Get rid of me. I'll tell you.

Put me out of my misery. Oh, it depends on the day. Fletch is so efficient and, like and helpful if you need to get shit done. Yeah. But Vaughn is more empathetic. So it just depends on what you need to get done for the day. Okay. So we're nothing but tools to her.

We're nothing but tools. Together you make one good person. Yep. Yep. Yep. Okay. So speaking of, what are your biggest pet peeves of each other? Vaughn's late. Vaughn's late.

All of that time. Today I was about to message, where the are you? I was on a big logging truck today and he had lots of logs on it. Now I was going to pass him on a part that's not meant to be passed on, but wet, dark, logging truck. Yeah, good. Okay. Well, it's best that you don't die. That was very much a on, but wet, dark, logging truck. Yeah, good. Okay, well, it's best that you don't die.

Yeah, that was very much a Final Destination situation. Final Destination, logging truck. I know, I can't be behind a logging truck without thinking of Final Destination. And that movie was literally, what, out 20 years ago? 20 years ago, yeah, at least. Ridiculous. Pet peeves.

We weren't done. He's late. What's Fletcher's? He's grumpy. I'm not grumpy. And I'm too perfect all the time. Ah, no, that's not a thing. That's not a thing.

Don't call me a diva because that's not accurate with you two. She's a diva. She's a diva. I don't know. Oh, my God. Damn perfect. No, he doesn't want to say anything because I'll literally hold it against him forever. No, no, I'll say it if I can think of it.

I don't know. Oh, bless. Yeah, you are. Okay, so you're perfect. Yeah. Okay, great. Well, that is another edition of Sly. Is that it?

You didn't have any other juicy ones? There was one more. Okay. What is it? Will Vaughn be the greet the boyfriend with the shotgun kind of dad or the hey sport, nice to meet you dad? Hey. Okay What is it? Will Vaughn be the Greet the boyfriend With the shotgun Kind of dad Or the Hey sport

Nice to meet you dad Hey I think I'll be the Hey sport Nice to meet you dad Until there's one thing I don't like about them And then

There'll be the shotgun And you're so judgy You're so judgy So judgy So there'll be like Something Something will definitely Pop up

You'll try to be the Cool dad Like a modern family Yeah You're like Phil You're trying to be the cool dad like a modern family. You're like Phil Dunphy. That would be the dream. All right, thanks for your questions. Slide into the DMs another round. Collectively they're known as the Inspired Unemployed.

You'll have seen the blue tick beside their name on Instagram. Matt and Jack, hello. Hello. Megan's got a blue tick. Half the people in this room have the blue tick beside their name on Instagram. Matt and Jack, hello. Hello. Got the blue tick. Megan's got a blue tick. Half the people in this room have the blue tick. These two don't. Come on, boys, what's going on?

No need. Who needs it? Who needs it? So what brings you to New Zealand? Well, so we did this Instagram poll thing for the weekend where we put up polls all weekend. We were like, should we do this? Should we do that? And our audience decided what we did.

So we put up a poll saying we're going to the airport tomorrow. Should we go international or domestic? They picked international. Now we're here. You're living a real life picket path. We've had a very anxious three days. Very anxious. And you guys used to live in queenstown right like back when you were you just tradies in queenstown yeah no no no i work in a fish and chip shop yeah you worked in a surf shop yeah yeah we're just cruising they're pretty like

easy jobs we yeah yeah was this over winter so you could snowboard? Yeah. Right, like every other Australian. Literally. And Pommy. I tell you what, the Australian arrest rate in Queenstown has just dropped in the last year because of COVID. So they'll be happy to have you back. We're very excited to go back. But they wanted to come back for about a year, as the whole rest of the

world probably has. So what have you done since they chose for you to come here to New Zealand? The polls have continued? Got very drunk. It was his birthday. Yeah, it was my birthday on Saturday. Happy birthday.

Thank you. So we celebrated that. We actually caught up with 660 and played a little song with them. And then... Got tackled by the All Blacks, which we were dreading the whole time. Did they go take it easy on you? Yeah, they took it easy on us. Still? Yeah, they took it easy on us. Still hurt, but they took it easy on us.

I wish we could take back time and just get flattened by them. Felt like we got flattened. Yeah, I'm happy with my time. I don't want any harder than that. Not concussed or broken. I'm feeling happy about that. Yeah, honestly. The whole way, so it was in Hamilton.

So we thought it was just down the road. Ended up being like an hour and a half drive. And the whole way I was just thinking about being in hospital with a broken back or blood, like spitting up blood. Yeah, because we spoke to one of the 660 guys and he showed us video footage of him getting tackled. And he reckoned he couldn't breathe properly for four weeks, did he

say? No, I think it was like four days. Is that Chris Mack? Yeah. He's got a weak constitution. He can't get blown over by a strong breeze. Yeah, it turned us off a bit. Is it pretty mind-blowing that you're just travelling around, you make these videos and that's your life now? Oh, so mind-blowing.

It's ridiculous. Still pinch ourselves, like, what's happening right now? It's honestly ridiculous because we've been doing it since day one, but we never made a living and now you make a living to just be an absolute idiot. So it's pretty cool. It's pretty cool, yeah. But is the offshoot of that that you would get heaps of people saying like, oh, I could do that?

Or, you know, like. Yeah. Yeah, I think. Because you're a couple of lads and it's naturally happening and you're just having a laugh and larrikinning about. Yeah. And every other larrikin now thinks that they should be making money being larrikins i feel like everyone could do it i don't think people understand the work that does go into it though a lot of people just like oh

yeah it must be you just they just see the the video come up you're like oh yeah but they don't know three days of work for that one bloody one minute clip yeah yeah totally um but you know a lot of people most people can could do it for sure yeah they just don't film it three days of work for that one bloody one-minute clip. Yeah, yeah, totally. But, you know, a lot of people, most people can and could do it for sure. Yeah. They just don't film it. We film it and put it on the internet. And it works for you. So how long are you in New Zealand for?

It all depends. Well, I think we're going to stay here for about a week or two. We're going to get an RV and then road trip around, I think. Yeah. Make a holiday out of it. A surf trip. Yeah. And maybe down in Queenstown.

Go furb, go you? Yeah. Yeah. Go back to the roots. Yeah, go back into the surf trip. Yeah. End up maybe down in Queensland. Go furby. Yeah. Yeah. Go back to the roots. Yeah, go back into the surf shop. Yeah. I don't know. Get up salt on salt again.

I think it's shut down now. Yeah, we ran out of business. Bloody hell. I don't know. Surf shop in the middle of New Zealand. Yeah. Possibly could go wrong. Well, Matt and Jack from the Inspired Unemployed,

thanks for popping in. Thanks, guys. Thanks for having us. Cheers. Keeping up to date with the news just became a little easier. As at Herald's new podcast, the front page is your short, sharp daily news podcast. Join me, Damien Venuto, every weekday morning

as I chat with journalists and newsmakers going behind the headlines to break down what you need to know on the biggest news stories of the day. Listen to the front page at nzherald.co.nz slash podcasts and follow us on iHeartRadio or wherever you get your podcasts. ZM's Fletch Warner-Megan, the podcast. The popularity of one name has hit an all-time low in the US

and I'm pretty sure this would be indicative worldwide. And you might be thinking it's Karen, but it's actually because of one person. Well, Karen has had a dip. I know that that's been in the news. The name Karen has kind of been... Yeah. It's less popular now than it was in 1930s or something.

Yeah, ages and ages ago. Ever since. But this is a man's name, I guess traditionally, and it's... Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong... Which one are we up to? Kim Jong-un. And it was Kim Jong-il.

And before that, it was Kim Jong-sung. Right. Okay. No, Donald. Donald. Donald has taken a dip. So according to the US Social Security Administration, it has lost 55 places in one year.

I mean, if you listen to him, he's the most popular US president there's ever been. He's the greatest. So that's going to come as a real shock to the ego. People still voted for him, though. Just always remember that. I know, yeah. So yeah, it's gone down to 610th.

You're probably not going to meet a baby Donald anytime soon. 610th, though, still, like, higher than I thought it would be. Still people calling their son Donald. Yeah. Which is, yeah. I'd imagine the hardcore Donald Trump fans would still be calling their kid Donald. Maybe even went that way because of him. Yeah. Which is, yeah. I'd imagine the hardcore Donald Trump fans would still be calling their kid Donald. Maybe even went that way because of him. Yeah.

Flesh Warner Megan. The podcast. ZM. Flesh Warner Megan. Refund your date. I depend on me. I depend on me. How it works is we hear from people who have been on less than satisfactory dates that

have cost them financially, as well as there may have been an emotional toll. Yeah. Well, we don't. We can't refund emotions. No. I could. Nobody's put a value on that yet, have they?

I could say they're there. Yeah. And like, pat. We could give you some reassuring words. Yeah, with your consent, I could pat your shoulder to offer you some sort of comfort. Okay. Other than that, we just reimburse you financially. Yeah, maybe you had to spend money on movies

or a dinner date or an activity. Emily joins us. Good morning, Emily. Morning. Now, you've had a date so bad, you think it deserves a refund? Oh, definitely. Okay, tell us what happened from the start.

So I matched with this guy on, it was like Tinder or Bumble I can't remember And we were chatting for like a month Oh okay Back before the pandemic Okay And so we decided

After we'd been like chatting for a month Like Snapchat all that was fine And then we decided Oh okay we'll go to Hamnifer Like the day Oh, the day. Oh, okay, the day. It's a romantic spot. It is, yeah.

It's not an overnight trip. No, it was just the day. And then he said to me, oh, the only car he had was a company car. So I was like, oh, that's fine. He was like, oh, could we take your car? And I was like, yeah, that's fine. We'll just take my car. So I filled up my car.

That was fine. We're on our way there, could we take your car? And I was like, yeah, that's fine. We'll just take my car. So I filled up my car. That was fine. We're on our way there and we're chatting. And I'm like, oh, this is what I do for work. And he goes, oh, this is what I do for work. And I was like, oh, my sister's actually in that field. That's what she studied. And he goes, I was like, oh, who do you work for? And he goes, oh, I work for this company.

I was like, oh, my sister works for that company. Do you know? And he goes, oh, what's her name? I was like, my sister works for that company do you know her? He goes oh what's her name? I was like oh you know this is her name. He goes oh I know her and I was like oh okay. He then for the next 15

minutes pretty much bags on my sister telling me like oh you know she's not very good at this. I don't think she's very qualified blah, blah. Oh, my God. He obviously doesn't know the rule of I'm allowed to bag on my sister, but nobody else, Darren.

Yeah. Like me and my sister didn't get along, but I wasn't going to be like, oh, okay. Yeah, right. So he does that for 15 minutes, and then we kind of continue to drive in silence. And then we get to Hamner and that's fine and we get inside

and he goes, oh, I've forgotten my wallet. Oh no. He forgot it in the car or forgot it the whole trip? No, no, forgot it in Christchurch. Oh. God.

No. He's like, oh, if you pay, I'll pay you back. No. And I was like, oh, okay then, that's fine. And he's like, oh, yeah, I've just got no data at the moment, so I'll just do it when we get back. I was like, well, the place has got free Wi-Fi, but whatever. Okay.

Okay, another red flag, yep. Exactly. And then we go in, we're in the pool, and he turns to me and he goes, Oh, your boobs are nicer than your sister's. What? Compliment though, compliment though, you win. I was like, you haven't seen my sister's face. Next time you're having an argument with your sister,

feel free to throw that in her face. What is he thinking? I don't know what to say. This guy's a jerk. Oh, my God. He's like, what? I was like, a thing. And then, because we're there for the whole day,

I also then paid for lunch. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Emily, I'm just waiting to get out. At the end of, so, and then, yeah, we kind of left

early, probably about, like, two o'clock-ish. We'd only been there a couple hours. And then, yeah, he then proceeded once again on the way

back to continue bagging on my sister. Oh, my God. And then we drove past something she'd designed, and he turned around to me, and he goes, oh, yeah, I completely scrapped your idea and redid that, so this is what it looks like now. Oh, my God.

What's his problem? And so did you just drop him off, and that was it? You just cut your losses? He didn't pay you back for the hamner weekend? He didn't, And the thing is, is like, I left him on Snapchat for about a week

and he kind of just kept Snapchatting me and I was polite, but like, I wouldn't open his messages for like 12 hours. Yeah. Seeing if I get the money back,

like trying to be polite and then after a week, I was like, nah, this obviously isn't happening. So I blocked him on everything. Wow. Well,

this is like, you've sold your debt to Baycott, we should chase him up for the Hamner weekend, we should give you the money and then we'll take on the debt and find him. Yeah. Yeah, we'll go around with baseball bats. Yes. And I like running Airbnb and

stuff, so it's like, you get the money. Okay, so how much money did you spend all up on the lunch, the Hamner and the fuel? It was $106. $106. Vaughan, can we feed that into the date refunder, please? Yep. Your date refund request has been...

Accepted. Yes. I mean, there was no doubt about it. We all heard the same thing, didn't we? The date refund is $6,000. Totally agrees. Congratulations, Emily. Holy moly.

Thank you. We've refunded that cash for you. And you're free of the6,000. Totally agrees. Congratulations, Emily. Holy moly. Thank you. We've refunded that cash for you. And you're free of the douchebag. And do a better background check before you go away with someone. Check if your sister works with them. I just need to see where they work. Yeah. I just hadn't thought about it. Oh, you know. Emily, well done.

If you would like to register a bad date that you've had, you think it's so bad you deserve a refund, you can just go to ZM online, fill out the details, and we could call you back and hook you up with a refund. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Joined on the phone by the Prime Minister, it's become a bit of a tradition. First question, firstly, good morning.

Good morning. Good morning. First question, vibe check on the nation. How are we vibing as a nation? Vibe check on the nation. How are we vibing as a nation? Vibe check on the nation. Yeah. A bit of anticipation, I'm going to say. Vibe check.

Oh, okay. Some big sporting fixtures. Wanting to know what's going to happen with a couple of other sporting fixtures. Are we talking America's Cup? And also, is the traffic going to be really bad at the field days or just a little bit of bad? Real anticipation out there right now. Speaking of traffic at the field days, Fletch has raised a good point off air. You should have waited

for this diesel ute thing till after the field days because now farmers are going to be like... Maybe the reception won't be as good. You may laugh about that, but you know, Vaughan knows that this was raised. I've talked about this.

I would have, like, when it was announced, I was like, hmm. Roaring trade. Roaring trade. Yeah. A lot of diesel utes get sold at the field days. A lot. Yeah, a lot. You're going to get it in the air holes.

Yes. There are some things we just need to get on with. No matter what, there's always going to be a gap between when we announce what we were doing and when the legislation would come in. So, yeah. When are you going to the field days? Today? Today, this morning. Do you have Prime Ministerial gumboots?

I have gumboots. Okay, what kind of gumboots are they? Because, you know, there's a lot of gumboot judgment at the field days. Yeah, well, actually, today I'm wearing, I'm just wearing, I'm not wearing my gumboots today. I have to go and speak at a lunch. And so I am still wearing appropriate shoes, so it's appropriate footwear.

There's a bit of mud on them. Oh, I was going to say, regardless of... They're not trying too hard. The minute you, you have to actually walk through mud to get into the field days. It's a compulsory mud on them. I was going to say, regardless of... They're not trying too hard. The minute you... You have to actually walk through mud to get into the field days. It's a compulsory aspect of the field. Have you not been to the field days for a while? No, I've been.

We went last year. No, the year before. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's not what I recall. So now it is not nearly as muddy as it used to be when we were in school and used to bunk out of school to go to the field days.

You can get away without gumboots these days. But you wouldn't because imagine the judgement. Oh, the Prime Minister has come down here. She's too good for gumboots. And you've got to make sure that your gumboots are dirty. Fine line, guys. I'm up on a stage speaking at a lunch and so in my gumboots.

You know what you should do is when you're walking onto the stage, you take your muddy gumboots off at the bottom of the stairs and you walk up just in your socks. Because that's the other thing, all the indoor parts

were like, please remove muddy boots on the way out. I'm back on Friday and that'll be a gumboot day. Okay, right. Slopping around in gumboots.

Don't wear those gumboots with the buckle at the top. Those flash green ones, what are those called, Megan? Hunter? Yeah, what are they? Hunter ones. Don't wear those. Yeah, I the buckle at the top. Those flash green ones. What are those called, Megan? Hunter? Yeah, what are they? Hunter ones. Don't wear those.

Yeah, I know the ones. For that money, you can get a real good boot. You know, with like a proper... Steel cap or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. Good money. From the light topic of the field days to everybody's talking about the movie that was announced,

the They Are Us movie, and obviously been a hot topic since. I guess because the first we heard about, well, the first we'd heard about the movie was it was announced who would be playing you in the movie, and that is obviously not the angle that a lot of people were happy to hear about this movie coming from. How have you found this, and what are your thoughts on this movie being made so soon when this is such a raw movie?

And does it need to be made at all? Yeah. Yeah, so I found out about it the day before, the night before it was announced, roughly. And the same reaction as everyone, really. You know, it feels very raw for us all still. And well, for a long time, not least for the community and the family members.

But secondly, then when I heard a little bit more about what the focus was, that didn't feel right to me at all. I mean, as I said, I think there are stories that need to be told, but they're the stories of our Muslim community, not mine. And so, yeah, it's been,

yeah, I found it a bit hard. Yeah. And since there has been fallouts, I've seen it a bit hard. Yeah. And since there has been fallouts, I've seen some producers have resigned from it. So, I mean, if people listen to it and it becomes a sort of product, like you said, a story that does need to be told from that day that talks about the Muslim community

and how they were affected. But even then, it still feels far too soon. It feels so raw. And the only way I think people are going to know whether or not the community wants those stories to be told feels far too soon. It feels so raw. And the only way I think people are going to know whether or not the community wants those stories to be told and when is by talking with them. So, you know,

I just feel like none of this is for, you know, this needs to be directed by those who are most directly affected. They're the ones that need to give this dare to people and so they're the ones that should be being spoken to. You didn't know about it prior to but has anyone involved in the movie

spoken to you since? No. No. No. Not at all. No. I heard about it then all I got told was just that there was this film that was going to be talked about the next day. The next day was when I saw the detail like everyone else. Yeah.

Right. And another topic, a different topic, maybe a little bit lighter. I would like to propose a glass tunnel crossing of the Auckland Harbour. You know, I laugh, but there are around the world these glass-bottomed bridges everywhere, which, yeah, I have to say I'm not a fan of it. I'm talking glass all four sides. I want this thing. Like a 30 metres. Yeah, Kelly Taldon situation.

So you do know that most of the proposals include having rail involved. So I don't think I've ever heard of a train running through a glass tunnel. Well, why can't we be a world leader?

And trains going through underwater glass tunnel. Well, why can't we be a world leader? And trains going through underwater glass tunnels. A feat of engineering. Yeah, and then it will also really force Auckland to look at the water quality of our harbour and what we've done to it because we'll actually be under there seeing what it's like from a fisher's point of view. You'll see the straws and the bottle tops just floating around.

And the lime scooters and the Countdown Supermarket half trolleys. Yeah. I really appreciate the thought you're giving it. You know me. Thank you. I'm sure it's... Don't pander.

I'm sure it goes to our engineers. No, yeah. If you need a consultant, I'm all on board. I've seen how much those goods get paid. Yeah. I can definitely just throw out some ideas over a lunch or something. That sounds like a bit of me. I mean, did you take your studies on this

further than just graphic design in high school? Absolutely not. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Little to no research done. That's what you need. You need a subjective point of view on these things. Someone who's not tied to the rules and how these things work.

The rules of physics and engineering. Yeah. Yeah, those pesky rules. Those pesky, pesky rules. Well, have a good time at the field days. Thank you, everyone. I'll report back

on the appropriateness of my footwear. Yes, please. Maybe we need an Instagram picture of the boots. Are these appropriate first day field days footwear? Yep.

I'll let you know. Awesome. Thanks for the chat. Have a good one. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Thanks for the chat. Thanks for the good one. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. ZM. I am the box.

Casey joins us. Good morning, Casey. Morning. Morning. Morning. Now, $20,000, it's a lot of cash. What would you do with it? Pay off my debt and take my family on holiday.

Yes. Boom. Okay, that's good. That's like semi-sensible and then splurgy. A bit of leisure. Yeah, a bit of leisure. All right, well, we need a four-digit pin from you that is also a four-letter word and there's a seven in there.

Okay, so it's six, six, four, seven. So what does that spell? What word is that? So it's noir, but it's black in French. Yes. Oh, like black widow. Yeah, black widow and black box. Uh-oh, do we have a winner on our hands?

I hope so. And you've got the seven in there. Yeah, the seven is in there. So let's try that. Ready? Here we go. Yep. So close. Not really. So close, not really. Ready? Here we go. Yep. Oh!

So close! Not really. So close, not really. All right, unfortunately, Casey, no! It's not noir. But great. I like the thought path you went to get there. We've got a double pass to Marvel Studios' Black Widow,

bringing you the box. It's in studios in cinemas. July 8th and streaming on Disney Plus with Premier Access July 9th. Conditions apply. Well done, Casey. A double pass and a double pass to every incorrect guess. The Prime Minister's just sent me a photo of the shoes she's wearing to the field days. She said footwear check. I don't think that's going to fly, to be honest. Oh, really? I'm not up with the field days play, but I don't think that's going to fly, to be honest. Oh, really? I'm not up with the field days play, but I don't think it's going to fly either. Because somebody just messaged him before saying, Auntie Cindy better get on the road because there's lots of

traffic. Yeah, if you are heading to the field days, traffic apparently is chaos. The person who texted me said they were there yesterday and she'll definitely need the gummies because there's a real mud underfoot feel to it. This is classic field days, by the way. It's going to rain the entire field days. Yeah.

When she was saying, I'm not wearing gumboots, I'm like, do a shoe change. Yeah, shoe change. Have the boots and the car. Yeah. She'll probably slip over in the mud, though. Madness. They look like they've got a bit of a half heel on them. Oh, will she never learn? ZM's Fletch, Vaughan

and Megan, the podcast. Yesterday, Sade and I set up our new bed. We were hashtag gifted by the lovely people at Sealy. And it's a super king because why not? Why not? You only feel guilty asking for the biggest one for about a split second. You can have any bed. asking for the biggest one for about a split second like you can have any beard I'm like what's the biggest one called

and so we've got a super king beard now and it's so so big you sent a photo I was like oh my god

that is massive it's so I'm mad I've gone mad with power Yeah In this huge bed Yeah So I said to her

You lie where you normally lie And I lay where I normally lay And then we looked over our shoulder To see how much room was in the middle And I said As a joke Room for a third Like that

To which she gave me A scowl that would peel paint. Okay. And so I said, ha, ha, only joking. Yeah, because I was. Yeah, yeah. Because I assumed. You don't even know what to do with yourself. I assumed a third would be a man and then I'd be beta male.

And absolutely superfluous to requirements. Yeah, and then I'd be like, is that how you do it? What are you doing? She's enjoying that. What is that called? I assume how it would go. Yeah, right. And then I'd be like, what are you doing later?

Do you want to play Fortnite? And then I'd try to make friends with the guy who's stealing my wife. Sure. From an ill-proposed three-way. Anyway, so I said room for a third and she gave me the scowl and then I was like, ha-ha, just joking. And I rolled over and I started tickling her. And I did this awesome move I do where I wrap my legs around her legs

and then I wrap my arms around her and she can't. And then you've got her. I got her. And she wriggles and she can't. And then when I've got my arms wrapped around her, I get my fingers and dig them into her ribs and I tickle attack her. And she's absolutely at my mercy. Yeah.

However, she wriggled a hand for it. And it was a hand that she had her phone in. And she went crack with the corner of her phone on my knee and hit what I'm guessing is the equivalent of the funny bone in the knee. Oh, yeah. And it sent the – I have never felt a shock like it. It felt like I'd been shot or, like, electrocuted, and it rocked straight up my body,

and it caused me to immediately release her. And then I tried to, like, get away, and I couldn't. My leg wasn't working. So then I fell off the bed and just hit the deck, and I was trying to crawl. You got kneecapped. I got absolutely smashed. And it was

I was like limping for the rest of the afternoon. Unlike me to really sell it to try to get sympathy. Like it took me a long time to be able to put all my weight back on the knee. You'd cocooned her. I cocooned her and she escaped. They always say you should smash at the kneecap, shoot for the kneecap,

kick in the kneecap. It's a real weak point. It was hard to describe exactly where she hit. It was like behind the kneecap but on the side. It's a real funny bone like the elbow and it just drops. It just felt like the pain was just bouncing and echoing up and down my body. And so. Well, that'll teach you.

Yeah, I've been. Starting a tickle fight. A little bit hobbly since. Right. But I was wondering on the back of my knee-based injury, after a little bit of a play fight, I'd like to know when play fighting has gone bad, because it can.

Yeah, because your reaction is just to. Lash out. Especially if you're being tickled. If you're being held and tickled, you're just trying to get away from it and like rogue elbows to the face. I bet people have lost teeth because someone's knees

gone into their mouth. Totally. Or face. Play fighting's just so dangerous at my age. Like, I'm going to do a hip. Do a hip, yeah. You fall funny and you're like,

oh! Or Or like they just I had her cocooned If she'd twisted me funny It could have popped a disc Yeah Or a neck And I just would have been like Oh

I mean I was in the right place I was on the I was on the Beautifully comfy Silly posture Peter Crown jewel That goes part way For paying for this giant beard that I've got. Yeah.

Absolutely delightful sleep last night, regardless of my knee injury that I sustained. Yeah. But I was wondering, yeah, $0.800 anymore, text 9696. When did, like, play fighting end badly? Just so you know, behind the scenes, Vaughn is winding up the Prime Minister.

Yeah. She sent me her boots and I said, I don't know if those are good for field days. And she said, they've done field days before. And then she said, are you going to field days? I said, I was going to go on Saturday, but it looks like it's going to be raining. So I'm like, hmm. Plus, it's right on the range of what my electric vehicle can go on a single charge. I don't have an electric vehicle.

And then she said, clearly you haven't driven a Kona. And she's even sent me a link to purchase a Hyundai Kona. Right. Because is that what she's got? She's got an EV. Yeah, maybe. Yeah, maybe. Great.

Well. Leave her alone now. She's trying to run the country. Do that nicely. Leave her alone. We're talking about play fights and when they've gone horribly wrong. Yesterday I was play fighting my wife on the Sealy Posture Pigeon at Crown Jewel, our new bed. Right.

By the way, I've just heard from my friends at Sealy. They've been so impressed with this endorsement. They soon would like to give our listeners the chance to also sleep like Vaughan Smith. And that's next to someone well out of your looks range. I assume they'll be helping you out with that as well. With this comfortable bed, you'll be luring and all sorts of good looking honeys. Like your wife.

Yeah, well, not my wife. No, like my wife. Sure, but not my wife. She's spoken for, thank you. So you're on this bed, this new bed, and you start play fighting. Was this you trying to kickstart some? Absolutely.

Absolutely, you did. It didn't work because she kneecapped me. She cracked me right in the knee with her phone, the corner of her phone. Yes, someone asked if her phone survived her phone. Yes, it's now her weapon of choice, and it did survive. But I've never, like, it was such a painful shock. I released immediately.

It must be like when you shove a finger up a dog's butt. When they're biting. It's like being tasered. That would have been a nicer. Well, I've never been tasered. Okay. But I've had a finger stuck up my butt while I was biting somebody. I released immediately.

Boy, Smith. Please watch your tone. Kushla, good morning. Hello. When did a play fight go bad? So we were kids. I would have been about eight or nine. And we were doing that thing where you try and put ice down each other's backs.

Oh, yeah. Classic. So we're running around the house, and then my brother's friend ran straight into the ranch and he just kind of panicked and stopped so his head was out and his body was in.

Oh my god! We lived in Brightwater just out of Nelson so we had to wait a while for the ambulance to come. So the whole time he just stood there with glass sticking in around his face.

Oh my god, and did you chuck an ice cube down his shoe because you had him? Yeah, yeah. He's bleeding and you're like I've got you now. Just pull the collar back a little bit with the ice down and he's like, okay. I totally would have done that to my brother. Gotcha. Alright, hey Kushala, thanks. You're called

Tess. When did a play fight go bad? This literally just happened on Saturday. Okay. My partner were just giving each other, like, grief, which turned into play fighting, as always done. Yeah. And then it started actually getting, like, really hot and heavy, and we were both, like, really into it.

And then for some reason, I moved up, and then he moved down, and he crapped his nose right on the side of my forehead, and his nose started bleeding. Oh, my God. Wow. It was so bad. It was so bad because I was, like, I felt really bad, but my head really hurt, so I was really peeved off at him,

and he was really peeved off at me, and we ended up being late for our friend's birthday party, because we were trying to stop and smoke, so I'm bloody dead. That's not nearly as exciting as being late for your friend's birthday party, because, you know, the passionate moment took over. Yeah, yeah. Brilliant. T6, you call some text messages. I was,

my boyfriend was tickling me, and he had me, like, from behind, arms. I couldn't move, but I did have my legs. So I kicked off the couch, but I kicked us back through a glass coffee table. He took the brunt of it as we went down through the glass coffee table. Those are never a good idea. They always end up smashed.

I completely agree. No table should be made of glass. I don't need to see what's under a table so much so that the top of the table needs to be transparent. I now know of three stories of those being smashed. I think we've all got

our favourite story about that. Yeah, we do. A story for another time. When we were kids, my brother and I loved wrestling and he tried to stone cold stunner me,

but he dropped me as we hit the ground, injured my neck. I was in physio for a long time as a child. Just finished physio. It was back to the trampoline slash WWF ring. The same sibling punched my two front teeth out. Jesus. I'm beginning to think there wasn't a lot of play in that play fight.

No. I was play fighting with my husband. He ran into the bathroom, so I tackled him. He fell backwards onto the basin through the basin onto the floor the basin came off

the wall fell on his head and then water just started pissing everywhere yes it's like a fight in an action movie

it is yeah my son and I he was tickling me and whacking me with a sock I laughed so hard I weed but I weed all over him as well.

Imagine having a memory of your mum weeing on you. Traumatising. Very traumatising. You go back to school, they're like, how was your weekend? Nothing, nothing happened. Are you okay? Who told you? Fleshforn and Megan, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. ZM. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Today's fact of the day is the story of the 1936 Summer Olympics held in Berlin, Germany. Hitler was there. It's that famous Olympics. Yeah. Where Jesse Jackson, the American sprinter, won gold.

And Hitler wasn't happy about it. But this is a story about two Japanese athletes, Suiyo and Shuhei Niishida. They were pole vaulters. And at the 1936 Olympics, Suiyo won the bronze and his friend Shuhei won the silver. So they competed in the pole vault and it was a draw. They jumped

the same height. Now they were asked then to compete against each other to see who would win silver and bronze but they said we don't want to compete against each other. We're friends. We're happy for it to be a draw but one of them had to have the silver, one of them had to have the bronze. So they don't do like two silvers

and no bronze? No. Because they have to decide. So they don't do like two silvers and no bronze? No. No, no, because they have to decide. So they went to the head of the Japanese Olympic team and said, what should we do? And the Japanese Olympic team said that Nishida had cleared the height in fewer attempts, so he should be awarded the silver. Yeah. And Suio should be awarded the bronze. And they said, that's absolutely fine with us.

Yeah, that sounds good to me. We're friends and that's cool. When they got back to Japan, they had a jeweler cut their medals in half and then rejoin them. So they both had a half silver, half bronze medal. And that became known as their friendship medals. That's cool. Because they said their friendship was worth more to them than an Olympic medal.

So they didn't care who had silver, who had bronze. And then when they got home, a jeweler cut it in half and rejoined it. So they had a half. It's still on display. Yeah. One of the friendship medals is still on display in Japan. It might even get wheeled out this Olympics. Yeah.

For a little bit of a this is. Because that's still happening, isn't it? Yeah. This is the Olympic spirit, you know, showing that two countrymen can be in a draw. And, yeah, it didn't end well. They both died in World War II. But, yeah, not a great happy ending to the story.

They were forced to enlist in a war to fight the Western allies. But, yeah, their friendship medal is still over. You can still see it. Wow. And you can just Google friendship medal and it's one of the first things that pops up, apart from a little... Maybe that's where the idea of the love heart friendship,

the best friends. Yeah, the best friends came from, came together. Maybe. Or maybe they stole the idea from the heart. Either way, it's a nice feel, isn't it? It's a good feel. Yeah, I've got half a spark plug with my best friend and they joined together to make a whole

spark plug. A whole spark plug. Because we love cars. Yeah, I was going to say, interesting you went for spark plugs there. You're such a dick. Is that believable? If it wasn't you that said it, it might be. It's just I know you have zero interest

in cars. So today's fact of the day is two Japanese athletes drew at the 1936 Summer Games in Pole Vault and decided to have half a silver medal each. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Yeah. Yeah, a woman online has talked about the fact that she has been married for seven years. Yep. And a baby is on the way, but her and her partner have always had separate bank accounts through dating, through their seven years of marriage, and even with a baby on the way, but her and her partner have always had separate bank accounts through

dating, through their seven years of marriage, and even with a baby on the way, completely separate bank accounts. Now, they have one joint credit card that's called their team card. Oh, yeah. And she said she does expect the team card to be getting more usage with the baby on the way. Yeah. But they've also set up their work going forward so that she's just not going to be a stay-at-home mum full-time.

Yeah. There'll be parts where she goes back to work. They're both freelancers, so they'll just work their schedule around sharing the baby and sharing the costs of this one card. That's things, you know, like if they go away together. And then at the end of the month, when they're paying, she pays it and then she Venmo's him for half. So she'll make a request for him to pay half of it. She said there has been the odd occasion where he can't pay his half, but then she puts into plan a payment plan where he'll pay her back over time. So what's the point? Because if they break up, they're de facto, right? So they have

to split everything. They're in America, so I don't know. It does not work like that. Yeah, I don't everything. They're in America so I don't know. It does not work like that. The internet can't believe this. There's just so much trouble. Yeah, you could be with someone so long and still have separate finances. What if someone

earns more than the other and so are they purely spending whatever they earn? Yes. So what if one of them really gets paid way more than the other? They can go out and splurge and then they're like,

oh, sorry, hon. You can't buy a t-shirt today. It just seems weird. No t-shirt for you, hon. But yeah, she talks about how she splurged on herself with a pair of $180 silk pajamas.

Yeah. And he bought another snowboard. So they just kind of like buy what they're into without any guilt. And they said they just don't argue about money. They've got lots of friends that are arguing about money. But apart from the situation where he couldn't pay his half of the credit card,

so she set up a payment plan. She said there's just no arguments. It does sound like they've both got, you know, like enough disposable income. But I does sound like they've both got, you know, like enough disposable income. But I just feel like if you were really uneven in the income, it wouldn't work. It wouldn't work, yeah. How soon when you met your wife,

when did you get a joint bank account? When we got a joint bank account when we were, like, when we got engaged maybe? Yeah, right. When did you open, Andrew, one of those little kids little savings account with an elephant you put the money in? A little cash in.

A little cash in or a Westpac chopper. When we moved in together we, shut up, had a joint bank account. Right. Because it made sense. You're paying, you know,

joint bills. So we asked online, Instagram, our poll, couples' bank accounts, you know, yay or nay, 71% said for sure. But there's still 29% of people that are like, Instagram, our poll, couples' bank accounts, you know, yay or nay, 71% said for sure.

But there's still 29% of people that are like, nah, separate accounts. Separate monies. I mean, yeah, I'd love to have separate monies because then I can't see what's happening. But, you know, I just, it makes sense having been through a divorce. They take half anyway. They take half.. They take half.

Yeah. That sucks. Right. That's why you squirrel it away and hide it. That's why you get an escape fund. In a shoebox. No, in a little elephant or a little helicopter. That's what you use that for.

That's your escape fund. Yeah. And when it fills up, you just hide that away in the cupboard and get a new one. Well, my accountant this week said to me, are you aware that your wife has a large amount of money squirreled away? What? I was like, what?

Escape fund. Yeah, and I said, like, an escape fund. And she worked out and told me how much it was. And I was like, my eyes were just like bulging. Well, I knew this day was coming. She was going to leave me, but I didn't know. She had absolutely fleeced me along the way. But no, it was because she's co-signed her on but I didn't know. She'd absolutely fleeced me along the way. Yeah.

But no, it was because she's co-signer on her dad's bank account. Oh, right. Okay, so she helps him. She was sorting out a whole lot of stuff for him. Initially started when he was overseas,

so he needed someone in New Zealand to do bank transactions. And this year's the first year that the IRD have tried a new system. So this was the first year that it showed up. Yeah, right.

And I was just like, what? At least that's what she's told you. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, she could still leave you and run away with her dad's money. I want her to take me. She should take me with her. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM.

It was my daughter August's birthday yesterday and maybe it's a tradition now because I've done it for both daughters twice. Yeah, okay, that's the start of a tradition. It is, yeah. I buy them a bottle of perfume for their birthday. I thought you were about to say a bottle of like rosé. I buy them a bottle of Kahlua and we sit down with a bottle of Miduri and we make shots.

Yeah, great. And that's how I want to raise my children and I won't be judged before it. No, I buy them a bottle of perfume. Yeah. And yesterday I went to pick out the bottle of perfume at the Chemist Warehouse. God, I love that place. It's so big. It's up there with stationery shops for me.

Yeah. Because you know how I love stationery shops. I don't know what it is about them. Like a warehouse stationary. Yeah. Or a smiggle. Oh, you say I love that as well. I love a smiggle.

Or what's that real flash stationary place? Kiki something. Kiki K. Yeah, that's flash as well. What about a typo? Yeah, I love you. I like a typo too. I like a typo.

Kimus Warehouse is like my Mitre 10. I just go in and wander. Yes. It's up there with that. Yeah, it's like going to a Mitre 10. I don't know. Let's not go crazy and say it's like a Mitre 10. It is. It is wander. Yes, it's up there with that. I don't know, let's not go crazy and say it's like a Mitre 10. It is.

It doesn't have a cafe in it. It doesn't matter. Imagine if it had a cafe in it. It's got a Coke fridge. Which is as good as a cafe. Yeah. No, I do. I love a warehouse, a chemist's warehouse too. I was walking through the chemist's warehouse yesterday. It was the

perfume section, looking at all the different parfums. Do you just pick a random one? This doesn't seem... No, I generally get them one from someone they know. Oh, okay. Like I got, I think Indy's first one was a Katy Perry. And then... J-Lo.

Yep. This is cute my dad bought me perfume when I was little too and I always remember that yeah

somebody said to me yesterday one of my mates was like how old is August 7 I was like should you be

wearing perfume I'm like well she just likes to smell nice just use pulse impulse to stop the sweating impulse

and then this for the smell yeah right so I was kind of looking and the security guard, who, if you've ever been to a chemist's warehouse, they're just stopping people pinching stuff.

Yeah. It's like the guy at JB Hi-Fi on the way out. Yes, they're always like, Or Mitre 10 or Bunnings. Yeah. Because you have to go out through the tills. This is, no, the worst is at Bunnings and the Mitre 10. They always look at you Like you're

Knicking a hammer They have to go through the tills The problem with JB Hi-Fi Is they put their tills In the middle of the store Or the back Yeah And so you've got to like

Work your way And you've got to walk past Everything to get to the tills You can't do a shortcut Do you always Try to put on A not guilty face Even though you haven't

Stolen anything Yes Mine's not so much A not guilty face It's a not guilty walk And you try walking Not guilty You're all out Not guilty I'm like Because the key is You're trying to get past them stolen anything? Mine's not so much a not guilty face, it's a not guilty walk. And you try walking not guilty, you all act not guilty.

I'm like, because the key is you're trying to get past them without showing them the docket so you don't have to be held up. Yeah. So you're like, okay, look cool bro.

Even though you haven't stolen anything, you're doing exactly what a person who had stolen something's doing. Yes. Do you always smile at them because you're like,

oh, if I was trying to steal I wouldn't look at them. So I look at them and smile and be like, I'm good. And they're like, can I just have a check in the bag? And you're like, oh, if I was trying to steal, I wouldn't look at them. So I look at them and smile and be like, I'm good. And they're like, can I just have a check in the bag? And you're like, fine, still don't look trustworthy. I don't look trustworthy. That's how you feel, I know.

It's the walk. Yeah. It's my... I'm not a criminal walk. Walk. So the security guard saw me looking. Yeah. And he came over.

I was in his late 50s. Right. Does he have a key? Because they put a few of the expensive smellies behind the locks. Oh, they were all locked. We're in West Auckland, baby. Oh, yeah. We're all in the cabinet.

We lock up anything that'll get pinched. You lock up bread rolls at the supermarket. Spam. All of the good stuff. Yeah. In the locked up plastic cabinet. So I'm just looking around and he's like, hey, can I help you? And I was like, not really.

I'm just looking. And then he's like, oh, help you and i was like not really i'm just looking and then he's like oh who are you buying perfume for yeah so completely ignoring that i didn't need help this guy's like this guy needs help he does and that's what i'm here you look lost and i'm kind of like he's a security guard i thought his role was primarily security yeah like there could be sleep people slipping through i know people might see opportunity. I could be a part of a gang where I'm distracting him by looking like a damsel in distress and now pinching vitamin C. I bet you he had his eye on the door as well.

Probably. He's very professional looking. Also, how amazing are the giant things of vitamin N? All the vitamins. Vitamin N, did you say? Is there a vitamin N? I've never heard of vitamin N. I need it. What is it? What does that do? That's why you need it. You've been missing out on it. Vitamin N. Yeah. All heard of vitamin N. I need it. Yeah, no, it's a good one. What does that do? That's why you need it. You've been missing out on it.

Vitamin N. Yeah. All the vitamins. Nicin. Yeah. Yeah, sure. I've said enough neutral granites in there. And so he's like, who are you shopping for?

I said, oh, my daughter. And he was like, oh, lovely, lovely, lovely. How old is she? I said, she's turning seven. And he's like, oh, great. You don't want her smelling like that. And to Brittany, one of Brittany's perfumes. Oh, yeah, right. Okay. And I was like, oh, great, you don't want her smelling like that. To one of Brittany's perfumes. Oh, yeah, right, okay.

And I was like, oh, okay. And he's like, who's she into? And I was like, well, this Ariana Grande. And he's like, let's try them. So then he's like, I'll get my key. That's what I thought he had the key on him. He would have to walk off to get the key. Oh, this is, what a nice man.

I thought he would have had the key. And so then we're best friends now, me and the security guard. We're sniffing all of Ariana Grande's perfumes. All of her options, her whole range. And I'm like, I like this one. And I put it under his nose and he sniffed it. And he's like, yeah, that's nice. These two grown men sniffing Ariana Grande fragrances.

This big hefty dude in his late 50s. And man, we're like, what do you think of that one? And he's like, yeah, I like that. And he's like, well, wait a minute, we haven't tried this one. And he puts it under my nose and I'm like, oh, yeah, I like that one too. And he's like, I'm a huge fan. I was like, you know, you're right. I don't like it as much as the other one.

So after a whole lot of back and forth, I bought Moonlight by Ariana Grande, which August said when she opened it, she's like, I love the bottle. And then she smelled it and she was like, it smells great. He knows. He knew. He knew.

And he'd seen people buying them all the time as well. He'd know which ones are the popular ones. Yeah, he knows what's up. So he was my unlikely ally on this journey. You have to go back and tell him it was well received. I'm thinking of calling on the way home just to see if he wants to get a coffee or something. You've made a friend, haven't you? Yeah, I think I've got a new best friend because we like the same smells.

ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's free and Clinton to listen to? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. And you say, live not give ZM's free and clean to listen to? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Hit music lives here. ZM.