ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - Fletch, Vaughan & Megan’s Podcast - 17th June 2021

Episode Date: June 16, 2021

Top 6: Bank  Sherlock Holmes  Yummy Yummy!  Sharde's Stew  Ex-Change!  Vinnie Bennett  Producer Jareds Influencer Update  Fact of the Day Day Day Day Daaaaay!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Hello, welcome to the Fleeche Vaughan and Megan podcast. It's thanks to McCafe by 5 McCafe Coffees. Get one free on the Maccas app. This is literally the last thing we have to do at work before we leave for the day. But, just had a message from Ross Boss. What? Don't leave early. That's it.

Ah, for fuck's sake. Are you joking? I'm leaving. I didn't get that message. See, I've just messaged back, well, don't arrive to work late. Don't come late. But this isn't his late. This is when ordinary people arrive at work,

we're just looking to punch out as soon as possible. Our disclaimer is today's word will for anybody who plays the word word on the New Zealand Herald. Don't ruin it. I got it like in one second by looking at it. I'm getting a little lazy now that I'm a genius. Now that you're included

in Mensa, you don't find a lot harder. I wonder if word wheels could be my entry to Mensa. No. I doubt it. Every day I can do the New Zealand Herald word wheel in less than 20 seconds. There was one day where it really stumped me, but to be honest, it was a word I'd never heard of.

That's a low bar. If you had a dating app, I'd love that you put that on your profile. Crank the word wheel every... I'm going to add it to my LinkedIn. I don't know if people know... I don't find the word wheel in the New Zealand Herald a challenge anymore. The word wheel, if you don't know, the word wheel. Insert a missing letter to complete the eight-letter word reading

clockwise or anticlockwise, and then one of the letters is a question mark. Oh, armadillos today. He literally just told you what it was before. Oh, did you? It's a disclaimer. Oh, I thought it was a new one. But when you said armadillos, I looked.

I was like, no. Nearly, though. No R. Nearly. Okay, so say the question marks and R. A-R-M-D-I-L. Yep, armadillos. Or armadildos.

Armadildos. Armadildos. Armadildos. Which are small creatures with little dillies off the shells. But if they get panicked, they coil into the shell, the dildos come out the side and just frantically vibrate. Have we just invented a great new defense mechanism for an animal? A wonderful defense mechanism. A great AFT.

Yeah, until humans were like, I'll get in on that. Yeah, true, because you'd have armadillos captured in the wild. You would, for their dildos. Yeah. It would have been the next ivory hunting.

Well, with the expanding Chinese middle class, the armadillos would absolutely be used for, people would be like, oh, it's for medical purposes, but absolutely no medical, you know, no quantifying of these so-called medical purposes. ZM.

Hit music. Lives here. Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast. Good morning. Morning. Morning. Happy Thursday.

Good morning. Morning. Morning. Morning. It really feels like it should be Friday today. It feels like it should be 2027. Jesus. I feel like I've aged six years overnight. I don't know why.

Dry eyes, real dry eyes today. Does anybody have any, what was that stuff you used? Clear eyes. Clear eyes or optrics for an eye bath? I don't know. Okay. Always remember to clean your eye bath after a possible conjunctivitis infection

or you'll just give the next person conjunctivitis. Yeah. It'll live on that optrix eye bath surface for a very long time. We had ants in our bathroom power socket. Shard A said to me How did you go from clear eyes to that? Just an infection.

Do you want to know how I went from clear eyes to that? I say in my the uptrex. The uptrex in my parents place is always stored in the cupboard in the laundry which is high with all the other medical stuff so that we could never get it to it when we were kids.

There was cough lozenges in there the laundry, which is high with all the other medical stuff so that we could never get it to it when we were kids. Yep. And there was cough lozenges in there. And I always remember popping a cough lozenge and then be like, oh, I'm not allowed to cough lozenge. I've been caught. So I just put them back in. Now, later on, I went to, mum went into the cupboard and there were ants everywhere and she traced the source that attracted the ants and someone had popped open a lozenge but not eaten it. And we all denied it and we all got in trouble and then I was like

ants and then the ants were in my head and then I was like I was dealing with ants yesterday and that was the ants that were crawling out of the bathroom power socket. That's how we jumped to that. So then I took the bathroom power socket off the wall and like banged it and all of these ants were falling out. Should you be doing that? I flicked the fuse off. Yeah, but you're not an electrician. I'm not an electrician, you're right, but I also wasn't touching any wiry bits.

Okay. And so now the bathroom power sockets are sort of like hanging out a little bit and there's a Coke bottle with ant poison in it. Hopefully they take it back in and kill themselves. That's got nothing to do with my dry eyes. Why do you have a sugary sweet power socket? No, ants go there because it's warm. We had this with an outdoor shed that had power in it as well. They got into the thing and then they build their little nest

because it's warm. And they get in between and they don't make it a perfect circuit anymore. Right. Why don't you just plug the hair straightener in or something? Would that frighten them? No, that's because that one had stopped working because of the ants, but they weren't showing their faces. Oh, right. So Shardé was always hair straightening in the other bathroom.

Right. Big problems. Big problems, but we're closer to solving them. Right. all the best you tinkering with power sockets I don't see how this could go wrong

coming up on the show your chance to win $20,000 cash with the box which is in studio it's all thanks to Marvel Studios Black Widow

so if you want to win that $20,000 cash we need a four digit pin we'll give you the chance to call through at

7 o'clock and 8, and throughout the day at midday, 4 and 5. The top six is coming up. Yeah, the bank is going to start charging you to talk to tellers. I think they already do. They already do. What? But they just got rid of checks for old people.

They can't hit old people with two whammies in a month. This is the problem is that the old people have to go in and chat to the people at the bank. And it's going to start costing them. This is some straight up bullshit. The top six other ways the banks could make a bit of coin. Poor old banks. Oh, they're doing it tough, aren't they?

We're not making much money anymore. So they're going to start charging the top six other things they could charge for. Right. News that's come out. Apparently Airbnb has a secret team behind the scenes. Doing? Doing what? Cover-ups.

Watching you go back to the Airbnb that you didn't book the first time and making it more expensive? That too, probably, yeah. We'll go there next. ZM. Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Well, in the US, Bloomberg Businessweek has done a piece on Airbnb. And a team inside Airbnb that is called Black Box, like a secretive kind of military.

Yeah, a secret agency or military operation. So apparently this team is secretive and it works to keep disasters and problems out of the press. And basically... Covers up bad PR. Yeah, covers up all the bad PR that Airbnbs get. And I'm guessing in countries like America, it's quite easy to get sued. Yeah, right.

So, you know, they want a team that's there preventing all of that and the bad news. And apparently, a hundred agents work across heaps of countries around the world. So I don't know if there's like an Australasian black box team. Is this

legit? Well, so Bloomberg Businessweek's legit. Yeah, 100%. And apparently the guy called Nick Shapiro, now he used to be an advisor to Barack Obama and Deputy Chief of the CIA. He had the role running

this, but has since left. And I think he talked to them about it. Apparently they've paid out on average about $50 million a year to hush some things up and to keep people quiet. Anything from sexual assaults to murder and stuff that happens at...

Murder? They've just hushed a bit of murder, haven't they? No, but they're not hushing the crime. They're not hushing the crime. They're just trying to keep Airbnb out of it, out of the press. Yeah, like trying to keep Airbnb out of it, out of the press. Yeah, like they talk about getting rid of bullet holes. Like plastering them over.

Yeah. Do they have to disclose if something like that has happened in an Airbnb? They don't, do they? No, I don't think so, no. Because it's not of any... But yeah, their aim is just to, I guess, support the hosts and the guests that were involved in whatever happened in that. But yeah, apparently it's, yeah, a bit of a blank checkbook.

Jeez. Is that a cool job? I don't know. It's like scandalous. Yeah, because as you said, they're not covering up the crime. They're just removing Airbnb's involvement. They have some great stories. So in this article, they say in one incident,

there was a sexual assault victim received a $7 million payout in exchange for agreeing not to imply responsibility or liability on Airbnb after a career criminal used a duplicate key to enter a New York City rental. Wow. Wow. Wow. Another incident, they had contractors cover bullet holes in the walls of properties or hire body fluid crews to

clean blood off the floors. What do they use to clean the blood off the floors? I mean, that's just a good ad for what they use to clean the blood off the floors. Handy Andy. Detail floor cleaner. Something like this happens and they just call in Black Box. Well, yeah, and then they'll come across for counselling,

new accommodation flights. Yeah, all kinds of stuff. Wow. Imagine working in that. And then apparently the people that work in these roles have either X kind of military or CIA. Isn't that crazy? So is there a black box team in New Zealand?

Well, it doesn't say. But that guy, that Nick Shapiro who used to advise Barack Obama and the CIA, he said it reminded him, the role reminded him of the White House Situation Room at times. Isn't that insane?

Yeah. When you think about it, there'd be like a bajillion rooms a night that people could be saying and there'd be all kinds of stuff going down. Oh, I need to know. I need to know the files. There'd be some juicy stories. But I mean, them telling us would absolutely undo what they've just spent all of their time doing. Exactly.

All right. 13 past six. The top six is coming up. The top six ways banks can make money because poor little banks. Poor little banks aren't making my money. And Wellington, if you enjoy driving down streets in your automobile, well, a couple of streets are going to be off the menu. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Wellington, there's a concept

Within three years They want what is called The golden mile in Wellington But what I would call The leaky bits when it rains Pretty much from Parliament Right down to the Embassy Theatre Which they call it the golden mile

But it's 1.6 miles So it's a mile and a bit And why are we talking in miles? Why are they still calling it the golden mile? Golden 3Ks or golden 2Ks's a mile and a bit. And why are we talking in miles? Why are we still calling it the golden mile? Golden 3Ks or golden 2Ks? Golden 200-bit Ks. It's not as catchy, though, is it? Nah.

No, it's not. Golden 2,000s or golden 2.5? From the Beehive all the way along Lambton Quay. To Embassy Theatre. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then down Courtney Place. So Lambton Quay, Willow Street, then down Manor Street and Courtney Place. Within three years, they want that to be car-free.

But buses both ways. Yes. Priority will be given to bus, I mean, to foot or bike traffic with bus lanes one each way, which to me will take up what is already the road, right? Yeah, because it's not going to add anything. Well, not that London Quay gets quite skinny at bits, doesn't it? What about a bus lane just one way and it did a loop?

I mean, if we're just chucking ideas on the table, there's one for free. Well, yeah, because if you're going to close off the roads to cars, you want to use that space for, like, tables and dining. Well, that's the thing. It's got all these artist's renditions of what it would look like, but it's just buses driving on the bits that the cars used to be on. There's not a lot of, like, but it's just buses driving on the bits that the cars used to be on. There's not a lot of new street life. And do you think they'll let delivery,

because people are going to have to stop the stores. Well, then there's still cafes and everything down there and stores that will need deliveries. Well, if I'm driving in Wellington, I'm going to have to get a Fastways Korea sticker for my car. I was just thinking of buying a high-ass van. Getting a yellow high-ass van. Just putting the hazard lights on.

You bet. Stopping wherever. Other things are planned for this project too. Second tunnel through Mount Vic. Okay. A rapid public transport system. Changes to the basin

reserve roundabout. I don't know what they're planning on changing there but don't change too much because I like telling people that's the biggest roundabout. Maybe it's wider. They's going to make it wider. Make it wider.

Okay. And an improved cycling and walking network. I always think Wellington's got a pretty good public transport. I mean, it can always be better, but it's already pretty good. The train system in Wellington's bloody stonkers. Yeah, you like that. Do you like the trains in Wellington? Don't you?

You like those? I reckon we could do some more light bloody stonkers. Yeah, you like that, do you? You like the trains in Wellington, don't you? You're a fan of trains. You like those. I reckon we could do some more light rail in the city. Yeah. Like this bus thing, they could probably get rid of that if you just had a good... Is it a tram? Is that what I'm after? Yeah.

Just light rail. A bit more than tram, but less than train. Like Melbourne or something. Yeah, one of those things. Okay. One to 200 car parks will go. Cease to exist. Retail is apparently not stoked.

Draining. But it's just a car park on that road where... But they're making it so hard for people to drive into the city. Well, that's what retailers aren't happy about. Still car park buildings, but then they charge an arm and a leg, don't they? You have to catch the bus. Yeah. God, imagine that.

Megan on a bus just to go shopping. And then you have to carry all your bags on the bus It's so draining I'm glad I don't live there At least you're honest You don't have to go in there if you don't want to There's still malls and stuff

in other parts of Wellington Yeah, right That's not what retailers want to hear though, is it? No, not the retailers that are specifically based in that area. All right. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. From the muggy ZM think tank, this is the top six.

Hello there. The banks, the old banks, the old bank, bank, bank, bank, bank, bank, is going to start charging for face-to-face. Well, they already do. This is the problem. But which ones have started already? So the problem is banks have got rid of cheques. Yes.

And this is what old people used a lot to pay for things. Yep. My man, big fan of cheques. Yeah, big fan of cheques. I think I was at the supermarket the other day and saw a sign. It's like, we're stopping accepting cheques. I'm like, cute. But see, I can't understand at your central Auckland supermarket

that they still accept cheques. That blew my mind. But I can understand why like small rural town supermarkets do because people have been going there for 50 years and they've always paid by cheque and that's the same old people that have, you know. Well, because cheques are going to stop,

a lot of old people are now having to go into the bank and don't know how to use ATM, like deposits and stuff like that. Yeah. And I, your banks, because I've been stung with a, I went in to see a teller about something and I got a fee and I was like, what? How much was it? It's a couple of bucks.

So the Herald and the Scrap Company Synergy from the herald.co.nz did a look at face-to-face transaction charges, over-the-counter in-branch transactions. Charges vary from $2.50 at Westpac branches to $5 at BNZ for staff-assisted and manual transactions. So those included things like over-the-counter withdrawals, so you withdraw money.

You could be charging anything from $250 to $5. They've been doing this for years. I don't know how you didn't know about this. I had absolutely no idea. Do they have to tell you or does it just go on your... It just goes on your... But what about when I talk to them on the phone? That's fine.

Because that's what they want. They want people to do it. What's the difference? And this is why... I don't know. They've got the branch anyway. There's so many branches are shut down after COVID, and I understand that.

There was, you know, slowdown and everything, and so many bank branches shut down. And then some are only open, like, Tuesdays and Thursdays and only between 10 and 3. Yeah. And those machines, when they ask you to do deposits, only take so much. So, like, when we were doing, like like till takings for the cafe, you can't

put heaps of money in there. And it's not a huge amount. You have to go in and get them to do it manually. So they're probably charging. Nana and Great Dad aren't depositing much, are they? What's under the bed? ANZ charges $3 for in-branch assistance, but offers the service for free to customers with more than $5,000

in the bank. So that's a poor tax. They're basically taxing poor people. Yeah. If you don't have enough money there. BNZ imposes a $5 fee for manual transactions. You should get a limit a month. Like you get like two a month or something. Well, for old people that might be good.

Yeah. BNZ charges five despite posting yearly profits of almost $1 billion. Are they struggling? They are struggling. Yeah, that's terrible. Yeah. So I've got the top six other ways the poor old banks can make money. Struggling.

Number six, take the pens off the chain. And if you steal them, the balance of a pen is automatically deducted from your balance. Right, okay. Unless it says free pens. Okay. But yeah, get rid of the chain so people can take them. And you're. Unless it says free pens. Okay. But yeah, get rid of the chain so people can take them and you're kind of tricking them

into taking them and then you charge them for the pens. Gotcha. Okay. Number five on the list of the don't please don't message in that this already happens.

You're the only one who takes the pen. Yeah, I'm the only one with the BNZ. We get free pens. Do they still do that? I'm not going in because if I have to talk to them

it'll be five bucks. Well, yeah, they're charging you five dollars. Well, I'm taking so many pens. I'm taking the whole box of pens. I'll be like, Sue, you can't take the whole box of pens.

I'll say, well, you can't charge me five dollars so we're even. I'll take a chair if I was getting paid to charge five dollars. It's a principle. Yeah.

Really, one of those really nice... Yeah, they've got some like chairs where you wait. Oh, that's more of a couch I'll take an armchair Just take the whole thing Yeah

Is that bank robbery? You're robbing from a bank But not technically bank robbery Bank burglary It's bank burglary, okay Number five on the list of the top six Otherwise the poor old banks can make some money In these trying times

They could make money off the money you have with them And then charge you a fee to have your money with them. Okay. It's a classic double dip. Right. And I'm pretty sure they do it already. Number four on the list of the top six other ways the poor old bank can make some money.

Charge you when your kid grabs a handful of those deposit slips at the bank and drools all over them while you're waiting. That was one of our favourite things to do when we were kids. When we'd go to the bank with mum, we'd fill it out, but withdraw, we'd put like a million dollars. And then we'd walk around and be like, great day for me, I got a million dollars. But you didn't.

No. Number three on the list of the top six other ways the poor old banks can make some money. Sell those plants they have in there. I don't know about you guys, but last time I went in, the bank had pretty good plants. Yeah, right. Good and healthy plants.

Yeah. I want to take that. What is that? Finger palm. Is that a thing? A finger palm. Finger palm. Fan palm.

It's like a little wee palm. And it's like that. Yeah. Looks like fingers. That's why I said it was called a finger palm. Number two on the list of the top six Otherwise the poor old bank can make some money Swipe your FBOS card

To even open the doors to get into the bank So you get up to the doors And you swipe it And it just deducts money To have the pleasure of walking on their carpet Yeah right And number one on the list of the top six Otherwise the poor old banks can make some money,

start taking blood and sperm deposits as well. Yeah. Sure, okay. Blood bank. Yep. Sperm bank. Yep. Cash bank.

It's all your banks in one handy location. That is today's top six. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. I am the box. Kylie, good morning Oh my god Hi Kylie, you're obviously very excited

at the chance of winning $20,000 Yeah, I've tried like you would never believe I've called over a thousand times I'm so adamant I've had this code from the beginning and yeah Okay, so I mean There's two outcomes to this and both of them are good for me I'm so adamant. I've had this code from the beginning. Oh. Yeah. Okay, so, I mean, there's two outcomes to this,

and both of them are good for me. Scenario one, you win, right? And that's great. Great. You won. You had it from day one. You believed in yourself. You're very excited.

I've got a feeling you're going to lose your mind if you win. Yeah. Fantastic. Scenario B, you lose, and we get to watch your dream crumble. Oh. Then I'll be able to sleep at night knowing it's not this code. So I kind of win.

Okay, so it's a win for you. It's out of your mind. You can write it off. Yeah. I'd be gutted, but yeah. So Kylie, we know that it's a four-digit pen that also spells a four, so Kylie, we know that it's a four-digit pen that also spells a four-letter word. We know that there's a seven in there.

And we also know the other clue. The game is rather hard, so now I offer a boon. You are searching for a secret word. It is coming soon. Yes, and it is coming soon is something that always shows at the end of a trailer. Oh, yeah, okay. Coming soon, yeah. Yeah. Coming soon, yeah.

Yeah. Coming soon. Okay, so what are you thinking the four-letter word is? This four-letter word that I am adamant this is, change my mum's life, is the word real. Now, why did you say change your mum's life? We recently lost my dad after three and a half weeks of cancer. Oh, clearly.

I want to remove scenario B from being an option I was looking forward to. Now I know the back story. Yeah, I'd really like to just get my mum on a plane, just anywhere. Oh, clearly. What's the word? Real. So how does that all tie into, you said it's at the end of trailers, it says coming soon.

So I'd done my research through and through, and when you look at the trailer, Google the trailer, and the word real, it's a superhero movie, you know? Yeah. And in the trailer, there's this one part, and it just gave me goosebumps, and I was just like, that's the word. That's the word, and I knew it.

And she said, somebody says the word real a few times in the trailer, and it's like, that's it. It's got to be it. It's got the number seven in it. And then when you guys gave the third clue, I was just like, it's a clue that it's in the trailer. And by guessing...

It's a clue that the word is said within the trailer. And so it's just adamant. By guessing real, you're also getting seal and peel. Yeah, thanks. But do you know what I mean? Because that's also a possibility. So it might be seal or peel and you could inadvertently...

I didn't look at it that way. It's a griefer peel and you could inadvertently do it. I didn't look at it that way. It's a threefer. What you've got here is a threefer. Okay. So that means it's 7325. Yeah. Okay. Let's try it. And here we go Oh

Oh Oh Kylie You'd make convinced I've been convinced for weeks I knew it Oh Kylie That is heartbreaking You'd be convinced. Kylie. Mate, I've been convinced for weeks I knew it. Oh, Kylie, that is heartbreaking. We do. I'm just glad I got through.

We do have a double pass. Every wrong guess gets a double pass to Marvel Studios' Black Widow in cinemas July 8th and streaming on Disney Plus with premiere access July 9th. Conditions apply. And I tell you what, why don't we get mum some flowers? Yeah. Just let's get her a lovely don't we get mum some flowers? Yeah. Just let's get her a lovely big bunch of

flowers because that's absolutely heartbreaking. You've been through a horrible last few months. Yeah, all I love to your family. Thank you. Alright, we've got another chance coming up for you to get into the box at 8 o'clock. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The Podcast. ZM.

Yummy, yummy. Well, this just popped into the old inbox. Hello. This is a change of where we were going to go here, but here we are. So, Yummy, Yummy, a segment of the show where we take a look at new food items and products here in Australia and here in New Zealand. Because, you know, when they're in Australia, they normally launch here. But this is a New Zealand product.

Aha. Surprise. It's coming out soon. Surprise if you love peanut butter and jelly. Yes. And Whittaker's chocolate. Mm-hmm. Because Whittaker's, and apparently, according to COO Whittaker.

What's COO? Co-Chief Operating Officer. Co-Chief Operating Officer. So, C-C-O-O. Holly Whittaker. I wonder if she's related. I doubt it. This is the first time Whittaker's has ever done.

She probably isn't. Wouldn't that be a surprise? Imagine if she wasn't. Just complete coincidence. But they hired her because she arrived. And she's like, my name's Holly Whitaker. And they're like, well, I'm heading no further. Welcome aboard.

Yeah. It is the first time they've made a chocolate block with one flavor at one end and another at the other. Because this is how it works. It's not peanut butter and jelly mixed in. One half is peanut butter. One half is jelly. So you snap off. I was going to say one square, but that's one row.

No one does that. You do a whole row and then you smash the rows together and eat them like a sandwich. Okay. So you have technically two blocks and sandwich them together, isn't it? Yeah. And they're using my favourite peanut butter, Picks. Yeah, that is correct. They are using Picks peanut butter.

Both sides are Picks because Picks have a boysenberry jelly, which is made from Nelson boysenberries. And that's why it's boysenberry flavour rather than like raspberry. We went for a tour of the Picks factory when we were in Nelson. That is, if you're ever in Nelson and get the chance to do it, so amazing. Pretty cool tour. It's so satisfying about seeing a factory.

Yeah. If you're allergic to nuts, I probably would give them this. Very nutty, the whole tour. They're free, right, as factory. Yeah. Oh, if you're allergic to nuts I probably would give them this. It's very nutty the whole tour. They're free, right? As well. The tours are free. Such an epic tour. I'd imagine they've got an EP pen on hand for the tour. Well, how many people might not know that they're allergic?

They're eating the peanuts. There's some people who are so allergic they can't even see them. They can't even be in the same area as a nut. Oh, okay. God. It wouldn't have lasted in the 1800s. What, when it rained peanuts? Of course you could have lasted in the 1800s.

You wouldn't have come across peanuts. There wouldn't have been an EpiPen, though, would there? Yeah, but there also wouldn't have been peanuts left, right and centre. Peanuts would have been harder to come by. But they didn't know they were new chicken in the 1800s. Through the 1800s and not knowing

you had an allergy to something. So many people died in the 1800s of peanut. They had peanut butter in the 1800s. No, they had peanut butter but it was harder to come by.

They just thought it would have been a real luxury item. Opulence. Yeah, right. And peanuts don't grow fantastically in the New Zealand climate

although up north apparently is the closest we're going to get. Fingers crossed for some more of that global warming. They get a lot of peanuts from Aussie, don't they? Yeah. All over.

But apparently PICS, speaking of, we're looking at some land up north to develop New Zealand's first peanut growing. Okay, well, does this say in the press release when the peanut butter and jelly Whitaker's chocolate is released? I don't want to talk about that. I want to talk about climates and what we can grow in certain areas of New Zealand.

As global warming wreaks havoc on the world. I want to talk about the possibility of investing in a peanut farm up north. Right. 21st of June, Monday. 21st of June. By the way, if I worked at the IRD and someone said they were making money for a peanut farm up north, I would assume that's a red flag to investigate. It sounds like a real...

It sounds dodgy, doesn't it? Yeah, it really does. It sounds like you're growing weed in the beautiful subtropical north. Alright, it's 18 past 7. From delicious chocolate and peanut butter and jelly to the disgusting slop I had for dinner last night. You're

in so much trouble. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. I'm just scrolling back to this time yesterday to try to find the beginning of this conversation between myself and my wife. Okay. Because she was going out for dinner. She was catching up with a friend, Esther.

That's the name of that restaurant. Oh, okay. She was going to Esther, which I want to know. We're trying to remember the name. We knew it was a female. I said Sharon. And I said Tracy. And then we thought no one would name their restaurant Sharon.

Esther. Ariel Sharon Mike. Yeah. Esther, yeah. Bottom of the QT in Auckland. Lovely restaurant. Yeah, so she was going with a friend. I wasn't even considered for invitation.

Well, you had to stay home and look after the kids. She wants a girls' night. Girls' tins. Professionals that look after your children. Or just lock the doors and make them promise not to use matches. I don't want you there ordering heaps of food. Yeah, I think they didn't want you there. That's what we can take from that.

I wanted to eat! So anyway, she knew that this was going to get me going because the food is so good. So she messaged me yesterday saying, guess what? I've popped on a lovely lamb stew for my big boy. So that you don't have to worry about dinner tonight. She butter him out here.

Did she call you big boy? I don't know. She's saying I'm going to one of your favorite restaurants without you and I'm putting on a stew Hey I love I love stews I love stews No I prefer stew

Stews got so much mobility to move Casseroles are a bit I was brought up on like a stew or two a week ago I can't do a stew now Nah my parents

always just gave us the blandest stews no one but like the room for a stew you can bury so much flavour in a stew I'm a huge fan of stews, no one. But like the room for a stew, you can bury so much flavor in a stew. I'm a huge fan of stews. Okay, yeah.

And so she's like, I popped the stew on and she put it in the crock pot. Yeah. And when I got home, I had a look and I was like, what is this? And she said, it's a stew. And I said, it looks particularly watery. Okay. Are you going for a soup? Are you trying to let me know what it felt like to grow up in 1970s Soviet Russia?

Light on the meat. Such a bitch. Big on the tube, bitch. Yeah. Very watery. And she was like, what? And I was like, I don't know why I do the effects. Maybe, I said, maybe the rest of the afternoon we'll see this

stew up into something quite delectable. You were looking quite early at the crockpot. Yeah, it was. You hadn't given it time to stew. Yeah, but to me, I reckon when you turn the crockpot on, what's in the crockpot should already be an artist's canvas of the possibilities ahead of you.

Okay. And so as the day went on, I would pop and I would do that thing when there's a crock pot and you don't want to take the lid off because if you take the lid off,

you let the heat out. You spin the lid and all the condensation falls off the lid. That's a crock pot trip, by the way. Spin the lid and all the condensation

falls off and you can see in. Well, I can't do that because I've got an oval lid. Oh. I don't have a purely circular slow cooker. I'm a circular crock pot. Damn it, I didn't think about that when I was.

You've got an oval as well. Yeah. Maybe you could wiggle it or something. Wiggle the whole crock pot. But then you don't want splashing. Anyway, I kept watching it. And to be honest, it stayed pretty watery looking. Now, it got to dinner time.

The girl said, we ain't eating that. So I made them something else and gave the crockpot an extra hour while they were doing it. It was at that stage that I was like, all right, it's me and you, Stu. What's going to happen here? And I took the lid off. I was like, nope, you're still, hmm. So I messaged her saying, how's your dinner?

Well, she's at this fine dining restaurant. Yeah. And she said, why? What's happened? I said, well, I just don't know how much corn flour you can add to something to thicken it up before corn flour becomes the main flavor of the meal. And she said, is it bad?

And I said, where did you get this recipe from? A Soviet Russian cookbook? And she said, it was just an online recipe. I said, now, was it under soups or stews? And she said, just add corn flour. I said, look, I don't know how much corn flour we've got. So what I had to do is I had to take all the liquid out of the, and then I had to reduce that in a separate pot,

add some corn flour, and I was just like, I'm not. So I added a sachet of gravy stuff we had in there to try to thicken it up. Poured it back in. And I was like, so stirred it around. And I was sending her photos of all of this just being like, oh, my God. This is barely salvageable. Absolutely punishing her during her lovely time out. This is barely salvageable.

I'm going to chuck in some gravy mix. And she said, is it nasty? I said, well, you be the judge. And then I sent her a picture of the stew and a picture of Stalin. And she said, pal, I tried. I said, sometimes trying, sometimes trying's just not worth it.

And then I sent her a photo of me sitting down with the stew. And then I said, I am puzzled as to how potatoes can be in a crock pot all day and still not be cooked. Oh, it's the type of potato. And she said, I followed the recipe. And I said, mate, where's this recipe? We need to have it removed from the internet.

And she said, ah, bloody hell. And I said, send me photos of your dinner. And she said, no. And I said, ah, bloody hell. And I said, send me photos of your dinner. And she said, no. And I said, you send me photos of that goddamn food. And she said, no. So then I sent her eight more photos of the stew, saying you've got to look at the stew. She sent me a frustrated Elaine from Seinfeld gif.

She'll invite you next time because she doesn't want to have to deal with this next time. So she just won't make you dinner next time so you can make your own. And then, so the stew was still too hot by the time I went to bed. So I messaged saying, you can deal with the stew when you get home because it's too hot to put in a container and put in the fridge. Oh, God, you're such a bitch. And then she messaged this morning saying, I tasted that stew, not terrible.

I said, yeah, but it's had all night to become a better stew. I don't know how she lives with you. And she said, you're in charge of stews from now on. I said, I think it's better for everybody that I become the house's stew representative. And then she said, I'm going to throw it away. And I said,

don't you dare throw that away. I'm eating it for lunch. After you absolutely punished her. No, you're missing the point. I only want to eat it for lunch so I can then, because she'll be home this time, I can give her this in person. Like, bleh. I can be like, bleh. How did you, bleh.

What is the bleh? So I'll be like, look at this potato. Ponk, ponk, ponk. How is it? Still like that. Yeah, she won't be uninviting you to a restaurant. She'll come to work tomorrow and be like, it's finally happened. She's gone.

She's gone, guys. Yeah, it was the stew. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. It was the stew that broke the camel's back. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Fletch, Vaughan and Megan's X Change. So X Change.

We've done this a couple of times. This is how it works. So, if you have something you have from an ex, a gift, something tangible that you don't want anymore because it's got bad jujus, you can exchange it with someone else. So if this item appeals to you and you've got something that you could swap for it, that's what we want to hear. We want to hear from you today. Jordan joins us. Good morning, Jordan. Morning, guys.

How are you? Good, good. Now, you received a gift from an ex. I did, yes. Okay, and what is this gift? So it's a Karen Walker Daisy chain bracelet. That's cute. Okay.

What is that? It's a chain and it's got daisies, like little mini daisies along. Oh, does it have the girl carrying the stick with the... It doesn't. No, just the daisies. Just the daisies. Yeah. Okay, cool.

I thought every Karen Walker jewellery had to have that. Yeah. Okay, what's the value of this, Jordan? About $500. Jeez. Okay, so obviously you're not with the ex now. That's why they're the ex. Does this have a bit of bad juju, this bracelet?

A little bit. So, yeah, he gave it to me as a 21st present. Okay. And we broke up a couple of years ago. We were together for almost four years. Oh, wow. Yeah, the breakup was quite messy and now it's almost like we just don't exist to each other.

I think we've seen each other in public once and we didn't even acknowledge each other. Oh, you pretended that. Wow, I love that. That's brilliant. So is this bracelet the one that's got little diamonds in the daisies? Yeah. Oh, you're giving away diamonds.

Okay, so that's got a value of like $500. So if you're listening now and you think, well, I would love a Karen Walker daisy chain bracelet with diamonds in it worth like brand new, that was $500. And you've got something you want to swap for that. You just call. And we'll put a selection of possible swaps. Yeah.

Forward. And one will be picked by Jordan. What kind of thing are you into, Jordan? Like what would you be willing to swap? Do you need anything? Well, me and my now current partner, we're actually seven months pregnant. So something nice and relaxing would be really good.

Yeah, okay. But I mean, anything you've got that could be around that value, 0800 DARS at M. If you want to swap it for the Karen Walker daisy chain bracelet, 0800 DARS at M, 9696 to text in if you can't get through. We're going to come back next and put some of these items to Jordan. Please warn of Megan's exchange. Well, Jordan is on the phone with us for

exchange today. Exchange. She received a gift from an ex. It's a Karen Walker. Diamond daisy chain bracelet. It's got little diamonds in the daisies. So brand new $500 from old Kdubs. Yeah. God, Kdubs must make

some money, eh? She's doing alright. I reckon she's doing okay. And if you've got something you want to exchange for this, Jordan could take you up on the offer. So Jenna has called in. Jenna, what would you like to exchange?

Morning. I have an Apple Watch 3. Oh, okay. What number watch are we up to now? Are we up to 5 or 6? Okay, 6. So we're three generations back. Still work alright? It cost me $650.

Yeah, you know technology, though. It depreciates a lot quicker than jewellery. Oh, don't start with me, Vaughan. Any scratches? Don't come in here trying to pawn off your shitty old watch, Jenna. No, it still works a treat. Okay. I don't wear it.

Okay, and it's in good condition? Yeah, yeah. Because, you know, Apple products hold their value for a long time. Well, that they do, and it's in good condition? Yeah, yeah. Because, you know, Apple products hold their value for a long time. Well, that they do, and it's the 42mm one. Oh, okay, so it's a biggie. Jordan, what are you thinking? I actually already have an Apple Watch. Ah!

Didn't need the sound effect, I think. Yes, we did, we did. Now I know that she said no. Well, no, I heard her say no. I wasn't sure. Well, you unclear. Yeah. And that's on you, not anybody else.

All right, well, if you've got something you want to exchange for the Karen Walker bracelet, Jordan is standing by making an offer. 0800 DALESATM. Please warn a Megan's ex. Change. So Jordan has a 21st gift from an ex that she wants rid of. She's got a new partner.

They're having a baby. They're having a baby. She doesn't want to remember him with this Karen Walker Diamond Daisy bracelet. It's worth 500 bucks. We want you now to swap for that bracelet. Shristi, good morning. What have you got? Hi, good morning.

I've got a really nice baby capsule. Oh. Yeah. Is that kind of what they put baby Yoda in and it kind of closes up? Yeah, it follows around. Yeah. Or it might be like the one they put Superman in when he needed to leave Krypton and fired him off to Earth.

How old is this? Yeah, yeah. How old is the capsule? I'm just a year old. Okay. Jordan, how does that sound? Is that a think about or is it a pass? That would be a think about.

Oh. Okay, all right. Okay, wait there. Si, what have you got? Hi, I have a diamond ring that's valued at $800. It was purchased by myself as my own engagement ring. You got yourself an engagement ring? Who were you getting engaged to?

Well, so I was getting engaged. However, he couldn't afford the ring. So I had to pay for it myself. And then I take it now you're not with him? No, I am not with him. Okay, wow, so this is like two really kind of soured gifts, isn't it? Only to them. Only to them.

And so what is the carrot, what the carrot value of it? Oh, I don't have it currently with me. It's sitting in a drawer, a locked away safe. Is it like one stone or a couple? Do you have a safe? That's so badass. It's quite a cool wee ring. It's got lots of little stones that kind of clustered together to make it look like it's three big stones.

Okay. It's a very beautiful ring. It was purchased overseas. Okay. Okay. So, yeah. So, what, Jordan, are you, is this tickling your fancy? Is this a no, a hard no, or is it a think about? A definite think about. A swap of jewellery would be quite nice.

Ooh. Definite think about. Okay, it's a definite think about. Wait there, Si. Let's go to Misha. Misha, what would you like to offer Jordan? Morning. I don't have this, but what I'm thinking is I'd like to gift her a voucher for a pregnancy massage.

Oh, did you have one of these, Megan? Yeah. What is that? No, I haven't, but I love massages myself. And yeah, I think that would be really nice. How far along in your pregnancy are you? You got aches and pains and stuff? Yeah, the back pains are real right now.

Okay, is that a hard no or a think about, Jordan? I might say no on that one. Luckily, the sound effect there has really reiterated. I mean, I heard her say no. Did you guys hear her say no? No, the sound effect was just rubbing it in Misha's face. Well, it reiterated... I mean, I heard her say no. Did you guys hear her say no? No, the sound effect really... The sound effect was just rubbing it in Misha's face. Well, it reiterated the no. Pep, what are you going to offer Jordan?

Hi, I have some white gold diamond stud earrings. Ooh, how much are they worth? They're worth around $350. What carat? Do you know? So the total diamond weight is 10 carats and they're 10 carat white gold. Oh.

Okay. And do these have a bad history as well? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Everybody's got these tarnished. This is why we have people lining up to play exchange. Jordan, is that a hard no or a think about? I think that's a think about.

Oh, the jewellery. Seems to be the think about. You're like a magpie, Jordan. Shiny jewellery. All right, let's take one more offer. Fatou, good morning. Good morning. Now, what would you like to exchange for this bracelet?

It's not very sensible, but it is a gift for your partner, a Gucci cap. A Gucci cap, okay. How much is this worth, though? It cost me around $550. $550 for a hat! How much do your

flexi fits cost you when you buy them in bulk? Oh, I reckon I get them for $18 on bulk a year each. Yeah. Yeah, each. Does this have, like, come with receipts? Yes, it does. Oh, yeah, because, you know, whenever I see Megan, Megan has the odd thing, and I'm like, that's from a market in Bali, Megan.

You're not fooling anybody. But this is authentic. $550 hat. Does it have a cooling function, or does it have any, like, neat tricks? Yeah, it's got a fan in it and a place to put your beer can, Vaughan. Perfect. That would hold its value better than your Apple Watch.

Yeah, but the Apple Watch is serving a practical purpose. It keeps the sun off your face. So does the $18 one. Jordan, what's that from you? A hard no or a think about? Yeah, my partner's a fisherman and I can't really see him wearing it. He'd prefer one of those big hats you get from like Mitre 10 when you spend so much money.

They're chucking a whole box of straw hats. Keep the sun off your face. Thanks anyway, Fatou. Jordan, are you going to pick one or are you going to pass? No, I think I'm going to go with the ring. The ring. The diamond ring. From Sy.

Man, without him, sight unseen. Sight unseen. Psy, are you willing to make the trade? I am definitely willing to make the trade. Oh, yes. We'll put you guys in touch. We'll wipe our hands of it and say, postage at your own expense.

Oh, yeah, this has nothing to do with us now. We don't want to end up on fair go. Oh, my God. Getting grilled by Pippa Wetzel. Diamonds for diamonds seems like a good trade. Okay, my God. Getting grilled by Pippa Wetzel. Well, I do know how to... Diamonds for diamonds seems like a good trade. Yeah. Okay, well, there you go, guys.

Congratulations, and you're getting rid of the bad ex-presence. Good luck. Thank you. All right, five minutes away from eight. Now, the Fast and the Furious 9 is out today. Yes, and it's got a few New Zealanders in it, actually. One is Vinnie Bennett, who plays a young Dominic Toretto.

A young Vin Diesel. And he's in studio with us after the news today. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. I am the box. Amber joins us. Good morning, Amber. Hi, how are you going? Good.

$20,000 cash. Could be yours. Wow. So what would you do with it? What would the first thing you spent money on be? Well, I'm in the car with my children and my son's just asked if he could have $1,000. So I don't know.

Has he cleaned his room? Is he down the chores? Oh, let's not talk about his behaviour today. Oh! All right, well, we need a four-digit pin from you, Amber. Yeah, so I'm going with the word peak because I want to have a little peak in the box. So that's 7, 3, 3, 5. Now, not peak as in the peak of a mountain. Peak as in have a peak.

No. Peak in the box, yeah. No, there's no mountain climbing here today. Just peaking in a box. P-E-E-K. Okay, let's do this. I'm about to click the enter button. Here we go. Okay. No. Oh, no.

No doubt. Bad luck. And now because you're a parent, you tell the child that you only lost because of their misbehaviour and if you ever want to win anything, you've got to behave better. Wow. Yeah, I'll go with that. Yeah, that's the sort of mental torment you put on your children daily as a parent. Hey, congratulations. We've got a

double pass for you with, even with the wrong guess, to Marvel Studios' Black Widow, which is in cinemas July 8th and streaming on Disney+, with premiere access July 9th. Conditions apply. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. We're joined in studio by Vinnie Bennett, New Zealand actor,

who's just gone and bloody broken into Hollywood. Good morning. Good morning. You are, and not just breaking into Hollywood, I say that like you joined a massive franchise in The Fast and the Furious, but you did Power Rangers as well. I did, yeah.

How did you know that? I mean, you're a New Zealander. I'm assuming every New Zealand actor's done either Power Rangers or Shortland Street. So you're kind of familiar what it's like joining a massive. Yeah. I mean, yeah, Power Rangers is, yeah, that is a big franchise. But yeah, Fast and the Furious is just like,

it's really something else. It's huge. It's like, you know, up there with Marvel in terms of film franchises, I think. The movies are huge. Like, you're always box office smashers. So, Fast and the Furious 9 is out today in New Zealand cinemas. You play a young Vin Diesel. Correct.

Was it your gravelly voice that got you to... I think he's hamming it. But then this morning you're like... a young Vin Diesel. Correct. Was it your gravelly voice that got you to do it? Oh, man. I think he's hamming it. But then this morning, you're like, hello. And I'm like, hey. Can you say, I am Groot?

I am Groot. Hold on. How does he do it? I am Groot. Is that it? Yeah. Totally. I was the same.

I was like, after the movie, I was like, he's probably putting that on but no no no yeah but yeah i think that might have um that might have helped a bit during the audition process sealed the deal for you did you know that you would were auditioning for that role not at all there was they sent me some you know the sides for the audition and they were dummies you know they were um the i think the character name was Derek.

I knew it was for Fast and Furious, and there's this guy, Derek. He comes in, he's like, G'day, guys. Shit, man, I just drove my Toyota or Corolla over here real quick. I'm Derek, by the way. I'm Fast and Furious.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah, so I had no clue, and I went Yeah, that's right. Yeah, so I had no clue. And I went like researching online. I'm like, okay, who might this Derek guy be? You know, all of these like crew members come up. I'm like, no, that's, no, I don't think so. So they didn't even tell you that this is just a fake name? No, no, no, they didn't.

They're just like, this is it. Go in and go for it um and yeah i just kind of went in and and did it in the casting director he kind of stopped me which you know has never happened to me before like during an audition i was part way through the scene and um he's just like okay stop and go back to the start and do it again so I did it again and and he's like yeah I think that's kind of it we keep working it and then he brought the actual casting director in this tiny little room in LA and I did the audition again, great. Well, thank you, bye. I'm like, cool. That's so weird. What does that mean?

I could never do that. I know. It's intense. It's a real strange process. And then how long do they leave you hanging? It was about maybe two or three weeks. Whoa! You've got to be on a three-day.

That's bad enough. Two or three weeks. And I get a call from my agent and they're like, okay, so I'm going to send you the casting director's number and she'll fill you in on the details of this role. So I give her a call and she's like, yeah, so it's for young Dom Toretto, if you're familiar with the series. So my name is not Derek.

Yeah, no, so it isn't Derek. It's Dom. I see what you did there. Yeah, and... So crazy. Yeah, after that audition, there was another one, I think, that I had to do, which they flew me over to London.

Wait, another audition? Yeah, there were three. There were three auditions in total. Wow. And the final one taking place in uh the studios in london while they were shooting um the film at the time oh wow yeah yeah that's so crazy so they hadn't okay wow yeah they were already like i think you know a month into production and um yeah they were kind of all on set at the time and i wandered on past

and uh hi guys yeah hey i'm derek and so you met vin diesel uh yeah i did i to be honest i thought um i assumed that he would uh kind of get in touch as soon as i was cast yeah you know a month or so after the final audition um and but no i didn't i didn't hear a thing from from from anyone for about five months yeah yeah yeah fully it was it was it was exactly that I they gave me the the full script to kind of

you know get into to read big thick script yeah and yeah

I kind of just sat with that for months obviously learned all my lines plenty of time to do that and that and to think on almost everything. Yeah, wow, that's a lot of time to think. Yeah.

Too much time to think. Too much time to think. So what was it like when you actually started getting on the sets and seeing everybody? Were you just like, this is just, am I dreaming? Yeah, yeah. It felt quite surreal because, you know, like I said, there's such a big gap.

And then finally, like a week out of shooting, I'm like, am I still, do I still have this gig? And yeah, sure enough, someone from Universal got in touch and they're like, hey, we want to get you over to London to start shooting next week. That's cool. I'm like, okay. So then, yeah, we flew out and yeah i got onto

set and yeah it was it was insane i i think as soon as i pulled into the lot of the studios i saw ludacris walking past melted in my chair and i tried to get out my phone to like catch a little video to show my mom she's a big ludicrous fan. Yes! That's so good. And was it pre-COVID that you filmed it? Yeah, it was October 2019. Oh, wow. Yeah. So, yeah, a while ago now.

Yeah. A year and a half. So, yeah, it's been kind of on my mind since then. It was originally supposed to come out um may i believe last year right um but you know things happened yeah yeah things happened yeah and yeah it got delayed and so yeah it kind of it's it's it's just been you know on my mind i've been wondering like just so many things you like filmed it 18 months ago. Yeah.

Oh, no, even longer. Oh, yeah, about then. But then all the auditions and everything. So this movie's just been, like, messing with you. It has. It's been taunting me. It really, really has. Yeah, ever since the first Derek audition.

Yeah, it's been sitting with me. But, yeah. So it's finally coming out and you can tell everyone that you weren't full of shit. No, exactly. The amount of people that are like, oh, we can't wait to see your little cameo thing in there. Wow.

It's a little bit more than that. Having seen it, a lot more than that. Yeah. A lot more than that. Won't go into too many details. Yeah. But yeah, well done, man. You're actually so stoked.

Thank you. Thank you. I'm really stoked yeah that's awesome man what next then what next uh this afternoon i'll be flying over to los angeles for the uh the american premiere which is tomorrow i think right next day tomorrow the next day yeah yeah we're in the future yeah it's Friday so it's their Friday so for us we'll be on Saturday

couple of days from now wow so walking a Hollywood red carpet with all the stars I don't even know how I'm going to get a photo with Ludacris have you actually met Ludacris? no I didn't meet anyone really like you know obviously Yeah, have you actually met Ludacris? No. Oh, my God. Honestly, I didn't meet anyone, really.

Like, you know, obviously Finn Cole and Michael Rooker, who I did the majority of my scenes with, spent a lot of time with those guys. But, you know, in terms of the core cast, they had all finished filming by the time they got on to our chunk. So you're going to be on the red carpet like, Oh, my God. Yeah.

Oh, my God. God. Yeah. All right the red carpet like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. I go, God. Yeah. All right. Hey, well, all the best, man. Fast and the Furious 9 is out today in cinemas across the country. Thanks so much for coming in, man. Thank you for having me. Enjoy the LA premiere.

Thank you so much. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. ZM. Quick backstory here. Producer Jared has dipped his toe into social media influencing. You may remember chapter one of the story

was sent some drinks. What were the drinks called? Calypso. Calypso drinks. Calypso drinks. He posted it on Instagram saying thanks to the people at Calypso. Calypso contacted him saying cease and desist. We did not give you these. This is not part of our social media plan. Cease and desist. We did not give you these. This is not part of our social media plan.

Cease and desist. Please remove. They were actually parallel imported drinks. And it was the company that parallel imported them that sent them to Jared. Yeah. So then phase two, chapter two. Also didn't get paid.

He got paid in free drink. For Calypso. Yeah. That's fine. That's for sure. He just wanted more free stuff. So then Phase two

Chapter two Got sent some socks And did a very sexy Photo shoot And asked for advice And we said You've got to make It's got to be one of those shoots

Where it's like You're showcasing the socks But it's not really about the socks It's about What you've got to offer Sex wise Sex sells socks It does

Sex sells sea socks By the sex store I believe the Saying goes The old saying And so he put up sex-wise, sex sells socks. It does. Sex sells sea socks by the sex store, I believe the saying goes, the old saying. And so he put up a very provocative image of him in the socks. Yeah. And that went well. Now we hear today, phase three,

he's got an official meeting about future influencing. Producer Jared. This is today. Yes, this is after the show. Now, I'm a little worried that you're getting a bit out of your depth here. Producer Jared, you're not going to value your worth. That's probably fair. As a millennial, I'm very uncomfortable asking for money.

Right. Right, okay, so do you need a manager? Do you need us to be your managers? One manager would be good. No, that's where they'll get you. That's where they'll get you. You want multiple managers. I'll do it and 10%. 10%?

Yeah. Is this like Shark Tank? Are you guys each going to pitch your cut? Fletch and I will do it as a collective for 7.5% each. Hmm, what other benefits? That equals more percent than me. Yeah, but you're getting two people. Oh, yeah, you're getting two people working all the angles.

Oh, yeah, but those two brains. Slick and eagle management. Yeah. Management and problem solving. More and more turn up and... No, that's what I do. I don't turn up. I keep them keen.

They're confused. They're like, why isn't he here? This is a business transaction. He must be so important. I could, yeah. What's the idea of this meeting? Are you going to do some more free posts for free product? Nah, mate.

Your boy's on the cash wagon now. Now I'm interested. Now you know that you're going to have to pay tax. Oh. See, we each take care of the financials in our management consulting team. Here we go. You know that once you go through all this

rigmarole and have to pay like 40% or whatever it is. Very rarely is it worth it. On your $100 fee. So is this going to be, like, do I have to buy MYOB or like some accounting? Oh, look, I don't think it's going to be that. I don't think that's going to be that exciting, mate. Or that much of a rigmarole.

No, but you might want to because by the time you've done that and paid our fee, you'll actually be in debt, which means you'll get a tax rebate come the end of the financial year. His agents, you're supposed to prop him up, make him feel good about it, not bring him down before he's even done it. No, no, no. I came up under 1980s, 1990s management technique.

You just tell people how lucky they are to have a job constantly and how lots of other people would love to do their job, I think is the management technique we approach here. I don't want to go

to this meeting, but you just go and tell us how it went and then we'll give you some advice. Could I like borrow an AirPod? We could like

intercom it. Oh yeah. Again, that's a lot of effort. I could zoom in and change my background to like the Hollywood sign and be like, sorry, I couldn't do that's a lot of effort. I could zoom in and change my background to, like, the Hollywood sign and be like, sorry, I couldn't do that.

I'm in the hills of Hollywood. Heard of it? Yeah. Yeah, that could work. So what are you aiming to get out of this? Money. Money. Fat stacks of cash and heaps of free product.

What are their free products outside of the Calypso? So, Murray, you don't want to get typecast. And what's the deliverables? Like, how much are they wanting from you? I don't know. This is why he's having a meeting. This is why he's having a meeting. We'll find out.

Hashtag ad. I feel like we need to manage expectations here because how many followers do you have on Instagram? I'll check. I'll check. 1,600 and something. Oh, dear. That's a, hey.

It's 1,693. Jared.ski at Instagram if you want to. Okay, yeah, right. See the sexy picture of Jared. Now, see, the company will be invoicing your company for that mention there, which is good. That's a further debt your company's accrued, so you'll be paying no tax and get a rebate.

I just want money, guys. Don't we all? And barbecue sauce. Yeah. Oh, yeah. This place has barbecue sauce. Are you going, yeah. This place has barbecue sauce. Are you going to be trying to become a barbecue sauce influencer? They've got an array of products, and I'm on board with 99% of them.

Okay, well, that's good. I can't wait until you forget to hashtag ad and have to pay a $2,000 fine or go further into debt, and the ASA comes for you. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do you want to know something yucky? Do you want to know something gross? Not particularly.

Not really. Do you want to know something that when I saw it, I almost did a little sick in my mouth? So you thought this would be a great fact of the day. This will be absolutely not news to horse people. Okay. Today's fact of the day, when horses are born... Ready? No, I don't want to see. When horses are born, out the bottom of their hooves, they have something called fairy fingers.

Oh, my God. I'm not sure what I'm looking at. So that's a horse's hoof. That's the bottom of its foot there. And these little things coming out are called fairy fingers. Oh, people need horse feathers. What is that? What could people Google to search that? It's got a name.

Horse fairy fingers? Yeah. Or if you just Google horse golden slippers or horse fairy fingers, it's called an eponychium. Eponychium. Eponychium. Eponychium. Yeah.

Eponychium. Yeah. If you Google fairy fingers horse, it comes up. And then what do they just grow out or something? They fall off real quick. So the deal is predators, this is in the wild when horses were purely wild animals. Predators were attracted to the smell of the like afterbirth, the placenta. So when a horse gave birth.

They were like dinner time. Wolves would be like, hold on. Hold on. Hold on. hold on. You guys smell that? And the other wolves are like, yeah, I do actually. And then they'd go and find it. So it was necessary for the foal to be able to move pretty quick.

You know, if you've seen a horse, literally it'll go and hit the ground and then the foal will be like, and kind of like, get up. It's all wobbly legged and everything, but pretty soon it can walk. Yeah. So it needs to have fully formed hooves when it comes out

because if they were soft or needed to grow, they wouldn't be able to put weight or strength on them. So they think it's... So they're born with these... Because the hooves are hard and fully formed, they need to have soft bits on them or they would just make an absolute mess on the way out because of all the soft tissue. If they had hard, sharp hoo they would just make an absolute mess on the way out. Oh, yeah.

Because of all the soft tissue. If they had hard, sharp hooves, it would cut the mother on the way out. So they need to have the fully formed hooves. And these things are just like soft bits that make it easy for them to get out. Oh. And then once they're out, they almost like immediately once they stand on them, just kind of like break off. Yeah, right.

Or like get worn down really quick to the level of the hoof so that the horse is not hurt. That's amazing. I've seen foals be born and I've never seen the fairy fingers. You probably weren't looking close enough. I probably was. Probably the last thing. The last thing you'd be looking at.

Yeah. She was all go. So gross. Yeah, they're real. It looks like an alien breaking out of a horse hoof, doesn't it? Yeah, it does. If you saw it, you'd be like, oh, this horse hoof's got like a fungal infection or something.

But it all wears down to nothing really quick. What about cows, though? Don't they have like hoovey situations? They've got hoovey situations, but their hooves must be a little bit softer. Right. Because I've never seen it on a calf. Oh, and I've seen one being born at your dad's farm.

Yeah, you saw him. He pulled it out that time, eh? Yeah, and then I leaned over the fence for a while. You always should have stayed in your house with your mum with the cheese and crackers. Yeah. Instead of wandering down and seeing your dad do that. Oh, that'll really put you off the quince paste when he pulls the calf out. Oh, God, I'm actually thinking about it.

It's a nice carving season again. I know, it's grim to watch. Well, that's life, mate. Yeah, but I want to live in the city and enjoy bliss. What do you mean, that cheese and crackers that you're eating up at the house of Christine? What do you mean, that's coming from? Champ? So today's fact of the day is when a horse is born,

a baby foal has little fairy fingers on their hooves. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. David Kras joins us in studio. You're a comedian. You were recently nominated for... The Fred Award. The Fred Award. The absolute echelon of New Zealand comedy awards.

Yeah, the most prestigious unknown award in New Zealand. But we're talking to you today about a tweet I saw you sent out and just the reply, for a start, so many replies, and the replies took me to a nostalgic place of growing up in a white, rural New Zealand family because you tweeted asking, what did you tweet? You tell us what the wording of it was. The wording was, white Kiwis,

what did you have for dinner on the weekdays? That's an appropriate question, right? It is. You didn't know? No, so we have this thing, like the flat that I live in, we're all Asian, right? And we have Sunday roast because we all love eating white people food

because we didn't get it growing up. So we know like that roast is like weekend white people food. But as we were eating it, we're like, they're not eating this every day. Like, what's their staple? What's their rice? What's their like adobo? Yeah, that's like the Filipino weekday food. And now I'm like, what's a ham steak?

Oh, a ham steak with pineapple. Why? Why are you guys into it? We're not into it. It's just what our parents fed us. It's thick cut ham steaks. That were processed. Fried or like grilled, but not for too long.

Yeah. And that makes me angry because people made fun of me for eating canned corned beef. And they're like, that's gross. And I'm like, you guys eating meat pucks. And that's apparently fine. It is a meat puck. So you went on this journey looking for other foods to try on a Sunday night, which is your like white person roast night.

I was like, oh, deviled sausages. What's that? From a Maggi packet. Maggi packet. And I go through like pack and save and you go through like, you know, that instant sachet aisle. And I'm like, oh, this makes sense packet. Maggi packet. And I'd go through like pack and save. And you'd go through like, you know, that instant sachet aisle. And I'm like, oh, this makes sense now.

All of that. Yeah. All of that. And the jar stuff. Lots of jar. Like chicken tonight. Bolognese. Yep.

Yep. Oh, what I really wanted as a kid was like Pat-Tax. Like I never had that because my parents were always like, no, no, we cook better food than this. And I was like, mum, you can't beat the advertising I see on TV. Thanks, Pat-Tex. This must be delicious. Is that the one where there was the power outage at the restaurant and they all went back to somebody's house for Pat-Tex?

It was like, what was it, crunchy poppadoms? Yes. Yeah. And that looked amazing to me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I didn't realise that was what white people ate and a lot of

mince based dishes as well a lot of mince like literally just mince with everything sometimes just mince yeah boiled potatoes

we had boiled spuds every night so does mince count as the meat in the meat and free veg yes that's disgusting that's like a bland

chilli con carne yeah no it was it was chilli con carne. Yeah. No, it was. It was chilli con carne without any and that's another thing. No spice. No spice. Salt? Yep. That was all. Mixed vegetables. Not too much pepper either. Yep. And kidney? Why are you guys into kidney?

Oh yeah, big. That's like making the most of every part of it, right? Like, yeah, the kidney, the liver. But you get weird when Filipinos eat chicken feet. Yeah, I know. It's delicious. You know how much spice we put on that to make those delicious? I know, and cooked right.

Those are like, they soften right up. You can get a good little bit of gristly. Give me some of that sinew. Yum, yum, yum. Delicious. What other sort of recipes popped up in the replies that you've maybe got questions about? Further questions.

What else did we have? Well, I mean like lasagna. Lasagna made sense. Yeah. Like a lot of spag bol. But you could see that there was like a curry revolution like in the early 2000s. Everyone started picking it up.

I think the most disgusting thing I saw on there was someone said that their dad to make stir fry would just put vegetables and meat into a pot and then pour a whole bottle of soy sauce and just boil it for like 45 minutes. So they'd boil it rather than stir fry it. Can we please just have liquid

umami just hit us in the face for like 10 minutes? What about meatloaf? Had you ever come across meatloaf before? Yeah, Philippines have meatloaf. We do that, but our meatloaf's kind of mild meatloaf's a bit different. We have sultanas in across meatloaf before? Yeah, Philippines have meatloaf. Right, okay. We do that, but our meatloaf's kind of, my meatloaf's a bit different. We have sultanas in our meatloaf.

We have whole frankfurters and whole boiled eggs. So when you cut it, you get like a little bit of egg, you get a little bit of, you get a little bit of things. So it's like a breakfast. I like that. Yeah, like breakfast meatloaf.

I'm here, but what about, did you get a lot of snitchels? A lot of snitchels? Oh, I do love a snitchel. Like, in real, I've never had a beef snitchel, but I do love a chicken snitchel. See, beef snitchel was,

I grew up only knowing beef snitchel. Same. Oh, I've Googled the Filipino meatloaf. It looks amazing. I saw, we lost Megan when you, when you said the Filipino meatloaf, I saw Megan just like, no, I must Google that.

We are going to need a good recipe for a Filipino meatloaf, I think, after this. Oh, yeah, I'll make a Filipino meatloaf. But we Megan just like, no, I must be recording. We are going to need a good recipe for a Filipino meatloaf, I think, after this. Oh, yeah. A Filipino meatloaf. But we thought on the back of this, we wanted to take some calls now from our listeners, from our audience. Yeah. What did you grow up on that was just like so typically white New Zealand fodder?

Yeah. Dinner fodder. Like pretty plain. Mum and dad's go to growing up the easy stuff I mean it was always a different kind of night when dad was in charge of dinner it was always a lot of frying and leftovers

your dad was at eggs, fried eggs you were basically having breakfast for dinner the first time that I ever witnessed pure true Kiwi cuisine was when my uncle who was born in Rakaia and grew up in Rakaia, which is like an offset of Ashburton. Deep South New Zealand. Right. He like catering to like four Filipino kids.

Right. So he had to look after us. So what he did was just put, he just put frozen chicken into an oven pan, put it into the oven, didn't season it, didn't do it, just put it in put frozen chicken into an oven pan put it into the oven didn't season it didn't do it just put it in there frozen and it came out after half an hour and it was just white just like white rubbery chicken and my cousin cried because he'd never seen food like this before and he was like why do we have to eat this that That's why I knew that we were built different. Yeah.

Well, we want to take your calls now. 0800 DALS at M. You can text as well, 9696. You're the whitest meal you could muster to remember from your childhood. Thanks so much for coming in, David. And you've got a show

in Queenstown tomorrow night. Yes, I sure do at the Sky City Casino at 8pm. And people can follow you on socials. Yep, David Post Office. David Post Office. Please, please, please, please follow me.

Wow, the messages coming through are so great. We want to know from you, your weekday childhood meal. This all started, Bourne's face looking at the messages. David Correa's popped in and said, he grew up, he's Filipino and he said,

I had not experienced much Kiwi cuisine. We always had traditional Filipino food growing up. We have a, in his flat of all Southeast Asians,

they eat a roast every Sunday because it makes them feel like that's why. But they were like, well, New Zealanders couldn't have eaten this every night. And he asked on Twitter, what else were you eating on the weekdays? And find a tweet because some of the replies will give you the mad nostalgia if you grew up anything like me. But we're taking your calls on it as well,

just the unexplainable Kiwi meals that we grew up on. Yeah, Chris, what was the go-to in the household hey yeah this is kind of very true oh chris chris your phones your phones cutting out aj growing up what was the meal um so my stepdad he would always make macaroni and cheese oh okay go to but he would never put bacon in it. It was always just white sauce and pasta. And he had all these different kind of peppers, so he'd put lemon crack pepper on it, and it was just disgusting.

Because I love a mac and cheese now. I feel we didn't get that too much growing up. We had a lot of pasta, but not mac and cheese. My kids would eat nothing but mac and cheese, given the choice. Oh, yeah, it's so delicious. I remember the first time I saw bacon and mac and cheese. I was like, what's this? And they're like, it's bacon.

I was like, so now you've got mac, cheese, and bacon. You've got to list every ingredient in the title. You've got to have the bacon in there. Thanks, AJ. Keep your texts coming through, 9696. Somebody else said, did anybody else get individual pies, but you had them with mashed potatoes and peas? Yes.

Yes, we certainly did. And you'd eat all the meat out of the pie and then fill the pie up with the mashed potato and the peas. Make your own potato top. All right. More of your meals next. See them. Who are you sending sexy photos of peanut butter and jelly to?

Oh, no. We've got a group chat here at work because if we go to the classes at the gym. Oh, yeah. And I said, guys, I'm out with my back injury and Whitaker's have just sent the new chocolate. I'm sending them all a photo to show them how tempted I am. Oh, my gosh, so tempted.

With an injury. I've already eaten it. Yeah, we've eaten it. It's good. It's delicious. Peanut butter and jelly. From delicious treats to the plainest, blandest meals you can remember from your childhood. We want to know what you grew up on.

What were those meals? Some text messages. And someone said, how has nobody mentioned smoked fish pie yet? Oh. Somebody else said corned beef has not been mentioned. Corned beef. In the slow cooker. Always in the slow cooker. Always in the slow cooker.

Always with cabbage. And the cabbage was added sort of later in the day because otherwise the cabbage would just go to mush. And there were always peppercorns in there, but mum was like, watch out for those peppercorns, kids. Those will burn your mouth right up. And they wouldn't have. They just would have added some sort of flavour.

Yeah. Renee, what was the weekday meal that you grew up on? My dad's famous meal was pig's tits on toast, which would be mint, a bag of mixed veggies, cooked together on toast. On toast?

On toast. Some cafes still serve mints on toast. I'm all for mints on toast, but dad sounds just like he's putting it in a pan non-seasoned with a bag of frozen veg, which contains, they carry a lot of water with them. I can't eat frozen mixed veggies to this day. It's just, it's so horrible. Let's talk about the mix, because people who didn't grow up on frozen veg are imagining

those bags with everything. I'm imagining there was peas, cubed carrot, and corn kernels. And they were all cut up to be the same shape. Yeah. Same size. That's a classic. A Ki're all cut up to be the same shape. Yeah. Same size. That's a classic. A Kiwi classic. Renee, thanks for your call.

Raya, what was your weekday meal growing up? So my first one would be mum's self-crusting quiche. Just because the egg was so close to the dish that it made a crust? Yeah. Yeah. I thought all quiches were supposed to do that. No, they meant to have a pastry. No, they meant to have a pastry.

Not in the Smith household. Okay. The main ingredients for that one was potato and mushy broccoli and whatever we had left over from whatever other meal we had. Yep. So that was not too exciting. And then the second one that I've thought about is her potato bake, which was just layers of potato and tuna with a bit of white sauce on it.

Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Megan's like, no. No, we all went. Bev used to, Mum used to make a great potato bake, but never tuna. Tuna would be.

Did she use the Maggi packet? Yeah, 100%. 100%. The tuna bake was a fish pie in our house. Oh, yeah. That's a classic too. Yeah, 100%. The tuna bake was a fish pie in our house. Oh, yeah, that's a classic too. Both of those meals I haven't made. You haven't made since? Yeah, because, yeah, exactly.

It's synonymous with growing up and having it like at least three times a week. Raya, thanks for your call. Somebody's just messaged in, Rissos. Did everyone else? My mum baked the Rissos. Is that normal? No, we always fry them. We always barbecue. We never had Rissos. Did everyone else, my mum baked the Rissos. Is that normal? No, we always fried them. It was a yellow fry.

We always barbecued. We never had Rissos in the winter. It was only ever when the barbecue was getting turned on in the summer. What was that stuff that you got in a blue packet and it coated chicken? Mum loved it. It was real young. Maryland chicken bake. Coat and cook.

Coat and cook. Diamond coat and cook. Yeah, yeah. That was a classic. Still exists. I know. It does it. It was real young.

We, I was just saying over the ads, we grew up really, my parents very rarely bought meat because it was always like home kill. My grandparents had a whole lot of chickens and once a year we'd have to go and slaughter the chickens and that was pretty ruthless when you were a kid, but funny. Oh my God, yeah. Oh, great, great entertainment. But then like when you were getting towards the end of the chickens, you had to eat like the layer hens are the ones that had like laid the eggs,

but they're not for eating. And they were like really. Oh, they sound like they need a slow cook for four days. That's the thing. And then by the time you got to it, it was you'd almost have one each because there was no meat on there. You'd be like, oh my God. But I tell you what,

if we'd had that bloody shake and bake or whatever it was called, it would have been absolutely glorious. Somebody else said white woman's boil up was what mum made and it was like sausages and a whole lot of vegetables just boiled in the same pot but like no pork bones no water press no broth to add to it

just the sausage skin just like peel off and float in the water like a sausage someone said oh my god I haven't heard the word hamsteaks for about 20 days and now I am so traumatised by how salty and chewy hamsteaks were

and we weren't allowed to leave the table until we'd eaten them. I'm sorry that you also had to go through that as a child who was made to choke down a hamsteak. So many amazing text messages

and calls coming through. Thank you. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's Bree and Clint a listen too? Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Head music lives here. ZM.