ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - April 08 2019

Episode Date: April 7, 2019

We chat to AJ who went to Australia to ride his first ever roller coaster, Vaughan has a review on Megan's new Cafe and when did you have a pet panic moment?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ZM. Head music. Lives here. Flesh, fauna, Megan. The podcast. Thanks, Sandy. Good morning. Welcome to the show. And as you mentioned, a chilly start. A lot of stuff. I saw mum sent me a photo. The mountain's got a bit of snow on it. Oh, really? Yep.

I saw some snaps around the country. Snow on ranges and hills and mountains. I put my flannel-y sheets on. You've seen, you know, you've overcommitted. No, but I don't have my duvet on yet. I've got my coverlet and my flannel-y sheets. Oh, that's right, because you're a nanny. You sleep under a coverlet.

Only in the summer. In the summer months. No, because apparently it's going back to being a little bit warmer. Which would be good for Easter, because that's not this Thursday, but next Thursday. Yeah. Which means Game of Thrones is a week away today. Oh, my God.

Oh, my gosh. Forget about that. I'm constantly forgetting about that, but it's pretty hard because every time you open any internet browser window, there's some Game of Thrones-esque content. Did you see that party they had? No. They had a Game of Thrones, official Game of Thrones-esque content. Did you see that party they had? No. They had a Game of Thrones,

official Game of Thrones reunion party. Because they haven't seen each other. You had your Sean Bean. Oh, it was a premiere, wasn't it? For the new season. Yeah, I think so. But very limited as to who could see it. Just basically everyone who's ever been,

had their heads cut off or killed or burnt alive or anything. They were all at the party. Looked like a hell of a shindig. Alright, well, Game of Thrones a week away. On the show this morning, 8 o'clock, we have a huge

concert announcement. I'm excited about this. I think as a show, we will be. Yeah. This is one of those concerts that's going to sell out. You're going to have to get in

real quick. 30 seconds. Yeah, you are. We're going to give you the chance to win the very first double pass at 8 o'clock. When we announce that show.

Right. The concert's not till November. No, the concert's not till... No, that's embargoed. Why would the month be embargoed? I don't know. Surely it's only the person playing in the month. You've just given something else away. I would have heard it because you went blah over top of him. Well, I assume it's not the month. Surely it's only the person playing in the month. What?

You've just given something else away. No, but they might not have heard it because you went blah over top of him. Well, I assume it's not a robot. I'm assuming it's people. Oh, it could be a group. You just said a person. Oh, no, I said... Oh, Vaughan.

Well, stop repeating everything he's saying. Yeah, you're reiterating it. It might just be glazed over. Oh, now it's my fault, is it? Yeah, it's both your fault, actually. I'm the only good one here. All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time.

All right, story time. I've got three news headlines. Warner, Megan, pick one of the following three headlines. We'll see. Headline... Well, you've got to, it's the rules. Headline one, personal security deposit. Headline two, tough undercover assignment.

And headline three, selfie warning. Selfie warning. Oh, someone's hurt themselves taking a selfie. Incorrect. Think you know it. Think you know it. Think you know everything. Think you know all they can blow.

You young generation, you think you know it. Don't think you know everything. Don't think you know all that you know. You young generation, you think you know everything. Well, I've lived. Did you hear him call me young? I said younger, and I was pretending to be a very old person. Oh, okay. So you could have been anywhere between 48 and zero, and that's an REO. One. You want the personal security deposit. 48 and zero. And that's scenario one.

You want the personal security deposit. Security deposit. Because it's usual safety deposit box. Well, normally it's a security deposit, like a bond, like a credit. At the weekend, I had to hire a car. Oh, yeah. So you put down your credit card, don't you? Yeah, you do. Or Ross Boss's credit card. I've got Ross Boss's credit card, the weekend I had to hire a car so you put down your credit card don't you? Yeah you do.

Or Ross Boss's I've got Ross Boss's credit card actually by the way in my wallet right now. Did that actually work though? It actually did work for the first time

in ages. What number has it got on it? Well you don't have to read it all out now but I feel like he gave me a fake credit card number for paying for parking whenever I drive to the airport

because they're always like it's there about your credit card. Oh, no, that's my credit card. Oh, yeah, I'll take that one. Yeah, show me that. That one's probably better. I'm really good at remembering. Is it that one?

I think it is. Those last three numbers look familiar. Okay. I just want to take a photo of that now. I've got a photo of that too, except he comes knocking if there's anything weird on it. That's the only problem. I'm not going to put anything weird on it. I just want

Paul to get to the airport next time. He's actually taking a photo of that. You're going to do the back. You're going to put a number on the back. Perfect. And technically it's not fraud, is it? Let's just keep that between us. Well, as I said, I'm not going to use it

for anything silly. Definition of silly to be us. Well, as I said, I'm not going to use it for anything silly. Okay. Definition of silly to be defined. Well, in China, millennials are using themselves to secure loans. So I'm going to show you a photo of some millennials here. The bits have been pixelated out, the details on their IDs, and they're bits because millennials and selfies in China are using nude

selfies of themselves holding up their ID as deposits, security deposits for loans. So you don't pay that loan. What do you think's happening to that photo? Your nudie gets released. Oh my god. In China? Well, I don't know think's happening to that photo? Your nudie gets released. Oh my God.

I know. In China? In China. Well, I don't know what's happening. Fitz! What? So, you know, I mean, we've got things like afterpay and credit cards and loans, but students, millennials so desperate to get their hands on, like, the latest gadgets, like the latest iPhone or whatever,

are signing up for these loans because maybe they can't get, I mean, social credit's huge in China, you know, that Black Mirror type rating system. Oh, my God. So this is another way of kind of getting around that. Isn't it crazy? Because then if they release them, could you,

well, I guess you sent it to them as the, do you sign a contract? I'm just trying to think of the legalities of that. Like they could just have them for their own personal collection. No, well, if they release them, you could say, oh, that's revenge porn, you know?

Oh, yeah, but it's China, so money seems to take precedent over people at the moment there. It's not a new thing, though. In 2016, a total of 10 gigabits. Gigabytes? Gigabytes, I would have said. Gigabytes?

No, it says gigabits here. But that's gigabytes, right? Hold on, there's a difference. You carry on. Okay, you can find out. So a total of 10 gigabits of nudes from 161 young women were holding their photo IDs were hacked and released

and leaked online by micro lenders. Okay, so that's the problem. Most of the victims were aged between 19 and 23 and typically borrowed between $1,000 and $2,000. Oh my God. That is, yeah,

that's a problem, isn't it? Yes. Wow. And then it also gets quite, yeah, bad at the other end if they can't pay their loans. Wow. And then it also gets quite bad at the other end if they can't pay their loans. They're offered some ways to pay those loans. Oh. Bad. It's bad news.

Oh. Yeah. That's not good. That's not worth the later part. So a gigabit is very similar to a gigabyte. They both represent measurement for digital storage space. However, the difference is found in the byte versus the bit. A gigabit represents 10 to the ninth power. Right.

So that's more. Right. A gigabit is more than a gigabyte, I believe. So it's heaps of nudes. Yeah, right. It was a lot of nudes. Tons of nudes. There must be some high quality video in those nudes. Would you use a selfie to pay off your if Afterpay were like, someone at Afterpay was like

give us your. Not for $1,000. Maybe if it was a bit more. But then, yeah, I don't know. Imagine if you had to do that for your mortgage. And they went in and I was like, I need to sort out my mortgage, here's my nude. And they're like, that's not going to cover it. Is this all?

Is this all? Yeah, that's not. And how much money you get depend on the quality of the nude. Yeah, look mate, big mortgage, small penis, that's not. How much money you get depends on the quality of the food. Yeah, look, mate. Big mortgage, small penis. That's not maths. It's not working out. That's not maths.

Fleshforn and Megan, the podcast. ZM. Do you know, this is a nice turn of events for younger people. Okay. Because, you know, a lot of people are like, no, I'm not interested in hiring young people. They're on their phones all day and they want days off to go boogie boarding.

Young people love boogie boarding. They love boogie boarding. One of them arrived at work on rollerblades and bloody near broke my neck. I don't want to employ young people. No work ethic. Well, a cafe owner

in Palmerston North has said they're only advertising for people aged between 18 and 27 because young people work no work ethic. Well, a cafe owner in Palmerston North has said they're only advertising for people aged between 18 and 27 because young people work best with us. Right. So does that upset some... Well, it's actually illegal to discriminate on age

out loud. Everybody does. Every single person does. Yeah, of course they do. But you can't do it out loud. But they said, I find those between 18 and 27 work best with us. It's about the nature of the businesses as a cafe. Yeah. It's hard for younger and older workers

to cooperate in a cafe environment. And maybe we can cross in a moment to our senior cafe correspondent, Megan Papadopoulos, for comment on cafe lifestyle. Yeah. And he said, most people were above the advertised age

and they weren't really interested in hospitality work. They just wanted work. I didn't think you could advertise the age. No, you can't. That's what he's saying. He doesn't care though. He doesn't care, right. So was he advertising the age that he wanted

or was he just saying it? We're hiring kitchen staff and front staff, 40 hours a week, 18 to 27 years old, available to work on weekdays, at least six months experience in hospitality. Right but you can't do that because if you had to like have job interviews and hire people yeah we have wow that's so crazy i know and then you did you do a trial yeah and then people i still find it weird that people ask me things and like, as the boss, and I'm like, I don't know. Are you like,

I don't know, ask the boss. I am. No, sometimes I don't know the answer and I'm like, that's an Andrew question. That's my co-boss

because I don't know much. Co-boss. Yeah, co-boss. That's the co-boss question. The boss. Other boss. I look after stuff. You would,

you'd just hire people and then decide once they're there. Well, like interview people and decide once they're there if they seem like an energetic. Did you interview anybody that you were like, nah? No. You didn't interview anybody bad? No, we haven't. That's better. Yeah.

But also, I haven't had anyone older come for the jobs. Right. Like most of the people that would come for, you know, like a barista or a waitressing. Yeah. Waiting. Yeah. I went at the weekend.

Generally quite young. I didn't see, but does your barista have any tattoos? No. Flesh channel earrings? No. Novelty moustache? None of the baristas have. No.

Actually, all our baristas are female, oddly. Oh, I mean, that's all right. You can still have a novelty moustache? None of the baristas have. No. Actually, all our baristas are female, oddly. Oh, I mean, that's all right. You can still have a novelty moustache if you're a barista. There's definitely ten more long black points on that. Absolutely no judge. Yeah. That's interesting. So, yeah, you can't...

Silly, silly guy. ...hire based on age, but everybody does. Everybody does. They just don't say that enough. That's the lesson. Says Paul who's definitely hired staff before. Is that a lot of hiring? A lot of firing?

You might have seen a movie about my life. I got flying around the country to lay off people. George Clooney. I got a lot of air miles. Oh, yeah, that's right. They had to go to play me. Probably just because of the physical representation. Yeah, yeah.

Lime scooters. Lime scooters. The lime scooter craze. And he was just going too fast, so I jumped out the way. Another day, another lime scooter story. So, lime scooters have another ish. Oh, great. Another day, as we say, another lime scooter story.

Another wee problem for Lime to sort out. So apparently they are failing to lock. So they had the problem where they were locking up. Well, I used one this morning on the way to work and it was fine. Yeah. But I think this was daylight savings related, wasn't it? Yes. So for people who have never used a Lime Scooter before,

once you're done with it, you take a photo and that's how it ends your ride and you get charged. It's geolocates. It's like when you take a photo on a modern smartphone that you need to ride a Lime. It's got a geotag in it and all it does is it then tells the next person who wants to look for a Lime that the Lime's there. Yeah. Yeah. And you end ride and then it charges you and you're done.

Accordingly. Yeah. Yeah, and you end ride and then it charges you and you're done. Accordingly, yeah. So some people have found it hard to lock them up and end the ride and then other people are getting a free ride on their credit card because they're like, well, it must be locked. I took a photo of it. I've done everything I'm supposed to do. I would never take an unlocked lime because you could literally be riding it

and the person could finally lock it. Yeah. And it would lock you mid-ride. Yeah, never thought about that actually. So they have said we're aware of some cases where customers are having difficulty locking their Lime Scooters at the end of the trip. We're currently looking into the cause. They say customers

are not being charged more than they should be for their ride. But if it does happen to you you can contact customer support and they're going to refund the charges. Right. So if you had an issue over the weekend with Daylight Savings, just request a refund. So we went back in time for Daylight Savings? No.

You fall back. We went back in time. Because we were about to go into autumn, which is otherwise known as fall. So normally it would feel like it would be 7.30 now, but it's not. It's 6.30. It's 6.30. Yeah. So light.

You might have noticed I was five minutes earlier for work than I usually am, but it was great because it felt like I was 55 minutes late. Dictionary.com have released some new words and phrases that they've added. Have they? Because, you know, they love to... Do we trust dictionary.com as much as we trust Oxford English or the Webster Collins? So you get in the dictionary.com before you got into, like, Oxford. Oh, you say get on the internet, it's easy.

It's the print you want to get into. I think it's less posh. Yeah, definitely less posh. Would you ever buy... I mean, of course you wouldn't. A dictionary, no. You absolutely have no purpose for it. But even if you're a teacher now, would you need a hard copy dictionary?

It's all online. Yeah. Yeah. Go to urbandictionary.com. See what it means. That's my favorite dictionary, urbandictionary.com. So they've added a few new phrases. JSYK, just so you know.

And JOMO. Oh, Joy of Missing Out. Yeah. Why is that? Well, because it used to be FOMO years ago. But not everybody's extroverted. Introverts like missing out on things because of the loudness and the panic and the people and the crowds.

No, you know how millennials are like, I'd rather just stay at home and watch Netflix. So that's the Jomo. Jomo. Which is the opposite of FOMO. Yeah. Which you're probably still getting anyway, right? Jomo is much more me than FOMO. Yeah. Which you're probably still getting anyway, right? I, JOMO is much more me than FOMO.

Yeah. I enjoy, I do enjoy missing out. If there's crowds and it's going to be loud, loud music, too loud, too many people. If I'm going to get bumped, I don't want to be bumped. I don't want to be bumped. Oh, being bumped. You can get that at the supermarket, loud music, lots of people get bumped. There's an option to avoid.

If you're careful in the supermarket, you can avoid being bumped. Okay, another new word. What do you think an aromantic is? Oh. Aromantic. A-R-O-mantic. M-A-N-T-A-C. Aromantic.

It's got something to do with aroma. A-ro-mantic. No. Aromantic? It's a person who is free from romantic attraction to anyone or free from the desire for romantic love. Fletch. Holy shit, there's a word that describes you. Because it doesn't mean that you don't enjoy...

So you still love someone, but you don't have romance. Yeah, there's no desire for romantic love. So you don't like... Yeah, you don't like the. Yeah, there's no such thing as romantic love. So you don't like the romance sort of thing. I can be very romantic, Megan. Don't look at me like that. Yeah, I think that's more Vaughn. He's like, none of that bloody. No, I'm all about a little bit of romance.

What was the last romantic thing you did? You fed the goats. Oh, are we including goats? No. Well, you seem to love your two. I love my goats. You're in love with them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Why? I bought special goat treats at the weekend for my goats. That's how much I love my goats. I saw you feeding them pumpkin. Like, did you buy them? No, no, no, no. That was another classic example of buying half a pumpkin with no intention to use the pumpkin,

and now the pumpkin's got mold all over it. No, but you said this about the grapes, but the pumpkin looked brand new. No, I had to cut it up. Are you lying? No, I'm not lying. It had soft spots.

Yeah, yeah, it was raw. You couldn't have turned it into a soup? Because you're being very wasteful. Oh, you could have probably turned it into a soup, but no one's got time for that.

You just buy pumpkin soup, don't you? Plus the goats. I need to see what they like. We're still in the experimental phase of our relationship. From the ZM Think Tank, this is the top six.

Today's top six is about Wife Swap, the British TV show originally. The Americans have done it as well. A wife swaps families with another wife. I don't know why they always swap the wife. They never swap the husbands. But they swap them and then they live in the other house for a week and it's always like some really progressive hippie family swaps with some ultra conservative religious family.

Yep. You just kind of watch. And sometimes it's like at the end of it they learn about other people. Yep. And there's that moment. But then other times there's not and they're just like, I can't wait to get out of here. Well sometimes it's like at the end of it, they learn about other people. Yep. And there's that moment. But then other times there's not. And they're just like, I can't wait to get out of here. Well, they say they learn,

but they go home and just go back to their old ways. But here's the twist. This is going to be on TVNZ. This had TV3 reality channel written all over it, didn't it? Sure. It's going to be on TVNZ. So the top six reasons going on wife swap is a bad idea. Okay.

Number six. What if the man your wife gets partnered with encourages her trips to Kmart and say stupid things like, if you want to just buy it, babe, you can't take the money with you when you die. Why would he do this? I'm going to have her back in a week. She'd come back and spend all your money at Kmart. She's getting all these bad habits.

You watch the show and he's saying to her things like this. Don't say that. Shh. You, shh. Number five on the list of the top six reasons that going on wife swap's a bad idea, even worse than the last one. What if your new wife, the one that gets swapped in, likes you better than your wife does, and then at the end of it she's like, the one that gets swapped in, likes you better than your

wife does, and then at the end of it she's like, I actually really like this person, and it's not your fault, you're just being your super adorable self, and then your wife gets real shitty with you because somebody else likes you because you still got it. It's true. Like, what do you do? That's what happened in

Files on Wives Swap. Shade, come back. Yeah, then Shade would be like, actually, you can have them. You're not still talking to Barbara, are you? I'd be like, no, she messages me, but I'm not messaging back. Give me your phone. I'd be like, mm-mm. Uh-oh, Barbara. You left Barbara out of this.

I don't want you talking to Barbara anymore. Excuse me, Barbara and I are friends. We experienced something together. And she likes me for me. Number four on the list of the top six reasons going on wife swaps

a bad idea. What if your new wife doesn't like your goats? I'm having enough trouble with my current wife thinking I'm spending too much time with the goats.

Yeah. This might feel very specific to people with goats. But you can just put anything in there. Goats, cats, kids, soup dust, Nis and Sylvia. That's

completely up to you. Completely up to you. Number three on the list of the top six reasons going on wife swaps a bad idea. What if your new partner that you get for the week fills the car up with petrol rather than leaving it on empty after they use it? So that

your first stop when you get into the car isn't the petrol station to fill it up. Imagine that. Obviously, you'd fall immediately in love with that person because they're being considerate. Yeah. That felt really personal. Did it?

Yeah. And passag, quite passag. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. One of our cars tells you how many K's you've got till you empty And you get in and it's got two little lines And you're like The lines didn't just appear there God damn it

Number two on the list of the top six reasons going on wife stops a bad idea Imagine if your new partner just decided what was for dinner Imagine not having a massive conversation that turns into an argument about dinner. Yeah. And then obviously you're going to fall in love with them. Yeah. Because they went and got dinner and they filled the car up while they were out. Wow.

But this isn't fair because they'll be doing these things just initially to impress you. I know, yeah. And then it wears off. It's like a brand new honeymoon period. Yeah, it is. Yeah. And the number one on today's Top 6 reasons going wife swap's a bad idea. What if your new partner can stack a dishwasher exactly to your liking?

They pre-rinse. Yeah. And then obviously you fall in love with them because that's a once in a lifetime opportunity to align your dishwashing chakra with your soulmate. God, imagine if you did find someone that pre-washed and stacked all the cutlery the same as you. They put the forks up and the knives up,

not down. Put all the bowls like in the same part. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Put the knives on that knife bit. Yeah, that little. You're in so much trouble

if Shado hears this whole list. And then just didn't just like chuck a whole lot of pots in there. Oh, you don't put pots in there. Yeah, don't put the pots in there. They take up way too much real estate. This is why Vaughn and I had our 15th anniversary on Friday.

We stack a dishwasher the same. And that's the key to longevity. Yeah, right. You can overlook it if your wife's significantly hotter than you, though, in my situation. But every time, it does irk. It does irk. How ugly am I?

That's when you look in the bottom of the pot, which kind of morphs your face a bit. You're like, how ugly am I that I have to put up with this? Yeah, that's right.

Yeah. That is today's Top 6. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Pet panic was what we want to talk about on the show. When your pet really panicked you.

Perhaps it was a false alarm, as mine was at the weekend. Got woken up yesterday, Sunday, Daylight Savings Day, so your time's and all other things a little bit out. Yeah. Got woken up, the girls come barging into our room. Ralph's eating a panda bun. A what? A panda bun.

A panda bun. Oh, these little squishy things. They what? A panda bun. A panda bun. Oh, they're these little squishy things. They look, they're like the original squishy. Parents are like, we know what you're talking about. I don't know. They're like these little squishies. They look like a steamed pork bun. And they've got a panda face on them.

No, no, no, they're squishies. I don't have time to go into squishies. So you don't eat them? No, no, no. Panda buns. See, they're eat them? No, no, no. Oh, yeah. Okay, okay. Panda buns. See, they're just like this round, they look like a steamboat,

but it must be a very easy shape to make out of that squishy material, and then you just paint it like a panda. Like a stress ball. They're like a stress ball. You can squeeze them, yeah, they're like a foam. And there's this woman on YouTube that renovates, renovates or zhooshes up squishies. Really? She's all about the panda bum.

Right. Parents are all about Oh that's so cute Yeah They're pretty cute But anyway the girls Got some panda buns Yeah

Ralph's eating a panda bun Okay Ralph's our 17 week old Oh I sound like One of those annoying parents That's like My baby's 22 months old

Just say he's just about Counting the weeks Old that your dog is I only know Because at the weekend Shado was like He's 17 weeks old now. So that's the only reason that's in my head. Oh, right, right.

And I've translated it into months. Anyway, this puppy. Half golden retriever, half poodle, has apparently eaten a panda bun. I'm like, oh, God. So I get up and I go out and I'm like, Ralph. And he already is quite scared of me. Yeah.

Because I'm alpha male of the house, obviously. Ralph. And he's like, uh-oh. I was like, Ralph. I said to the girls, this is why you can't have stuff on the ground. Oh, you guilt tripped your kids. I was like, but they're always just leaving toys on the ground. And he chewed Barbie's arms and legs off the other day.

So we've got quadruple amputee Barbie in our house now. And I said to the girls, I'm like, this is what happens. You can't leave stuff on the ground. He just chews it up. I'm just imagining you finding his poo outside and it's got a leg sticking out of it. Barbie's like, ow! We better remember it was a Barbie hand because the one he ate had a ring on. So it would be like a hand was coming out of the shit with a little ring on.

Like a scary movie poster. So I said, again, we can't leave toys on the ground. He just eats everything he doesn't know. That thing looks like a steamed pork bun. Not that he's ever been to Yum Char and experienced a steamed pork bun, but you know. God, if he had, though. Oh, he'd be into it.

He'd be able to eat them all. So Shada's like, do I call the vet? I'm like, I don't know. She's like, you always hear about blockages. But before, it's like, let's wait and see, because I don't want to spend money on something. Exactly. Sunday vet, are you kidding me?

Monday to Friday, vet's expensive enough during working hours. Sunday vet, are you kidding me? Monday to Friday vet's expensive enough during working hours. Sunday vet, hold your horses. So, Sade's then googling all about dogs eating things and the blockages

and it was like a good hour's panic. Not cancer, but like, it just blocks them. They can't eat, they die. Or,

various super expensive procedures to surgically remove. So I'm just like, oh God. Well, it's been fun while it lasted. Who was I talking to? I can't remember. Talking to a friend and they'd used all of their insurance claims for-

Like no longer insured? Yeah, because their dog had eaten so much stuff, they'd run out of insurance. Yeah, the insurance, your premiums just get so insane, they're like, you'd be better off. I've never heard of that happening. Yeah, no, this dog just eats everything, and the insurance is like, well, next time, we're not covering that.

You're done. We don't cover eating anymore. So there's like a general hour and a half of panic. Yeah. And it's just starting to die down and the dog's seeing all right. And then Indy's like, found it. And we turn around and she's like, didn't eat it. I was like, what do you mean?

She's like, oh, he was chewing it under the couch and it just got like pushed behind this part. I was like, oh my God. Well, like, thank goodness. But at the same time, you just came screaming in that he'd definitely eaten it. I didn't think for me to like look around where he had been eating it. Yeah, right. I said, did he chew it up and then swallow it?

And it was like, he ripped it to pieces, which we found is a total lie because it was still in a whole bit. I was like, you guys told me you saw him rip it to pieces. Well, that's just because we were scared you'd be angry at us because he ate it whole. I'm like, well, don't lie to me about the situation. It makes it way worse. Whereabouts are your kids getting this overdramatic thing from?

And lying to get themselves out of trouble. I don't know. I don't know where they're getting that from. They certainly don't witness it every day from their father. Just a little white lie to make the story better. A little white lie to make A, a story more dramatic, but B, also get himself out of trouble. He's not afraid to sprinkle the white lies around, is their father.

So the panic was over. And pets do this. Children do it too, but pets, oh, they panic you. Well, and because people love their pets so much, like a member of the family. If something like that was to happen, you would panic, wouldn't you? Or what about when your cat or your dog limps for just a few steps? Yeah.

Because I'm like, they'll be right. Or it's their time. Yeah. Again, very expensive. Very expensive. Would they make it

in the wild? That's what I always say and that doesn't go down well in our house. Yeah. But people freak out when their dog does a couple of limps. Yeah. Oh, they lose their in our house. Yeah. But people freak out when their dog does a couple of limps.

Yeah. Oh, oh, oh. They lose their mind about it. Yeah. And then he's fine or she's fine and nothing else happens. But due to the fact that we love our pets so much. Yeah. Or don't want to pay for the vet bills.

What is, when have you had a pet panic? When did your pet really freak you out? And hopefully the story ends with it being absolutely nothing. Or it ends with a giant vet bill

and there really was no reason for it. Yeah. Like the toy was under the couch. Yeah, imagine if you'd taken Ralph in and they're like,

well you have no sign of any panda bun. Scanned him and there was no panda bun. Alright, so 0800diles.com give us a call now. You can text as well 9696.

When did you panic Over your pet? We're talking about Pet panic When your pets Freaked you out Because you thought Maybe it was lights out

For them Or that eating A spongy panda bum And it turned out They hadn't even No Eaten a squidgy Panda bum

Squidgy panda buns Are not edible Nicole When did you have A pet freak out? So it was a couple Of years ago But I was at home And my husband was away At the time And I was with my two Panamans are not edible. Nicole, when did you have a pet freak out? So it was a couple of years ago, but I was at home and my husband was away at the time and I was with my two daughters and Bella was four at the time. And I was mowing the lawns down the bottom of the hill.

And to paint you the picture, we had a station wagon car and we have a little chihuahua. Yeah. So I couldn't see them. So I went up the hill to see what was going on. And what she'd done is she'd put the chihuahua on the. So I couldn't see them, so I went up the hill to see what was going on. And what she'd done is she'd put the chihuahua on the leash and put her in the boot, and then she jumped over the front seat and was pulling her over. So she was hanging when I went up the hill. Oh, my God.

I freaked out entirely. Like, I didn't even, it didn't even matter what Bella was doing. I just grabbed the dog, and she had she had like a purple tongue and was like, and I grabbed her and she finally like got some air into her and she was just panting and kind of like in shock. So, yeah, I just thought she was going to die. Oh my God, you cat nearly hung the dog. Yeah, basically, like if I had left her a couple of minutes longer,

she would have been gone. Wow. I love that in the middle of that dramatic story, you found the need to correct from hung to hanged. Which I appreciate. Because it's hard.

It's very hard. Yeah, it's not hung. You say hanged. Yeah. Oh, my God. And did your daughter know what she'd done? She did when she saw, like,

because I didn't even have time to, you know, sort her out what she was doing. And so when she saw like because i didn't even have time to you know thought her out what she was doing and so once she saw how much panic i was and with the dog she was kind of like oh my gosh she was only i think four at the time and she was like oh oh she didn't know you could have you could have held that over here for quite a while actually couldn't you grow up no we're not paying for your university because you hung the chihuahua that time. That's true. Thanks, you cool Nicole. Kate, when did you have a pet freakout?

My cat's really old and, like, actually near death. And so when I was sitting in the lounge one day, she came around the couch pulling her back legs, like her back legs had no movement. Like dragging them behind her? Dragging them behind her. Yeah. And I just freaked out.

I just started screaming. I started panicking. I started sobbing, not snobbing, like straight away. My husband's in the toilet going through a relaxing poop, and I'm, like, screaming at him, going, oh, my God! The neighbours heard, everyone heard. And my poor Molly,

I think she just sat on her back legs for a bit too long. She just screamed. Like, yes, like, pins and needles in his little cat legs. Wow, and so the cat was fine. Oh my God, yes, but I had to call the emergency vet

like in the middle of it all so I'm like screaming at them, telling them my cat's dying. Slowly shutting down from the back legs.

Oh my word, they're just dragging behind us. Runs off. Because she gave it a fright. Brilliant. Oh, Kate, thanks for your call. Shelly, when did you have a pet freak out?

It was probably about a week ago. Okay. And I had a major freak out. We've got a puppy. Yeah. And he was just outside on the lawn, went to do his business, and it came out bright red. Like, it's blood, it's blood. I start running around

in circles, yelling. And my partner's like, call the vet, call the vet. Do I pick it up? What do I do? And he's not freaking out, and I'm freaking out. And I was like, why are you not freaking out? And he said, oh, he just ate a red crayon this morning. So many people have said this, that their

dogs have eaten something and they freak out because they see it in the post. And I know exactly what someone said, their kids slime. The dog ate the whole batch of slime. And everyone was like, oh God, the dog's going to die. So everybody watched it. The dog was sweet. And then they looked out on the lawn and there was just these sparkly piles

of dirt all around the lawn. Oh, brilliant. Shelley, thanks for your awesome text messages. Somebody else said, I saw my dog get hit by a car. We live in a 70k zone. The dog ran onto the road, boom, hit by the car. And then ran away up the road, dragging its legs, howling.

And they were like, running after it, but it disappeared and they stopped howling. They couldn't find it. And then they were just, it was gone all night. The next morning they got a call from someone saying, hey, your dog's at my house. And they were like, oh my God, is he alive? Yeah, no, he's fine.

He's just eating biscuits. And the dog was absolutely fine. But for a night, they were just like, my dog's taken itself somewhere to die. To die. To dead? To die. To died.

My dog's died. I'm just real panicked and my dog has died. Somebody said said our cat and a few of these I have never heard of cats doing this our cat

fake died and there's like four text messages in there what they pick up their cat and the cat's stiff like it's dead

and they're like really sad somebody said one of the examples was our cat was on the side of the road and it wasn't moving so they picked it up

and it was stiff and they were like oh my god the cat's been hit by a car and they took it home and they did it halfway, oh my God, the cat's been hit by a car and they took it home and they did it halfway through

telling their kids that their cat had been hit by a car and then the cat's like, walks in, they're like, ah, pet cemetery

but it wasn't the cat. Did we like double check my cat was really dead because it was, nah, because it was, what? Yeah,

no, it was. Yeah. It was. It was, yeah. Just when you said that I was like, oh my God, did we check? We did it.

We double checked. Yeah, we double. We did all the checks possible for your cat. Well, I mean, it's at your place. It's your pet cemetery, mate. If I go out in the holes, I'll be like, ah! I will be abandoned in the house and set everything on fire. Because that's how it will work

Yes, for sure Welcome one, welcome all to the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast Brought to you by Spark Get four gigs of bonus data on Spark's $49 prepaid value pack Now, on with the podcast There's an interesting scenario that happened in Albany Stadium's pool So this is on the north shore of Auckland Yvette was her name and she was at the pools.

And she posted this on her Facebook page. So I just got kicked out of Albany Stadium pool in the rudest, most unprofessional way. A woman who was supposedly the duty manager pulled me out of the spa while I was happily going about my day and told me that I needed to have a conversation with me in private. Apparently the bikini I was wearing and I have been wearing at the same pool for the past few months is not appropriate. Her exact words were, this is not a rule, but a few of the mums have complained about it, so I have to wear something more conservative. So I'm assuming it's quite a skimpy bikini.

So she's shared where she got it from. She said, I bought this from Glassons, literally across the road, and literally all the bikinis look like this. So it's not even like a string tri bikini, but there's no rules that you can't wear those either. It's just a little crop top and, like, bikini bottoms. Yeah, right, but that's still covering up as much as any other bikini, isn't it? I was so worried about what you were going to say.

What? That's still covering up the bloody... Fletch of bikinis. Still cover up the... What's covering up all the bits that would be indecent? So that photo you showed us was the Glassons website. Right, okay. Do we know

what the... because this just sounds like jealous, okay. Do we know what the... Because this just sounds like jealous mums. Are you going to say, what does a vet look like? Yeah. Beautiful. This is a problem. Jealous mums. That doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. It shouldn't matter. And so it turns out, so there's a comment from Albany Pools and they've said, look,

because she said she went to get her money back. She said, well, if I'm leaving, I want my money back. And they apparently laughed. Are you kidding me? to get her money back. She said, well, if I'm leaving, I want my money back. And they apparently laughed. Are you kidding me? They asked her to leave. They asked her to leave but didn't refund her. This is where someone has spoken for the team at Albany and said on behalf of the lifeguard who spoke to the customer,

I would like to apologise to the customer. We are sorry. She was made to feel uncomfortable. And the lifeguard who passed on the feedback from other pool users now realises it wasn't the right thing to do and she was never asked to leave. But we do understand her decision.

They're going to get in contact with her and say sorry and make sure she knows she's welcomed back. So apparently she wasn't asked to leave but then you'd obviously feel pretty uncomfortable sitting there knowing that that feedback was going around about you. Then what did they want her to do then if not leave?

I don't know. They said, do you have any other bikinis that are a little bit more conservative? Yeah, I always carry eight. Am I back? I always carry eight very conservative bikinis. I like to carry a range of bikinis. Yeah, and where's the rule on the wall

where it's like, this is acceptable, this is not acceptable. And I've seen some old dudes in Speedos that are certainly not acceptable. Oh, that to me, like real old dudes in Speedos is more offensive, isn't it, than that would be. Yeah. But, I mean, you're not going to go up to an old dude in Speedos any more than you should to a girl wearing a bikini.

Exactly. Yeah. Don't complain about it. Just mind your own business. Don't complain about, just mind your own business. Don't complain about people in bikinis either way. Do you know what? If it wasn't other jealous pool goers,

it may have been like some wives catching their husbands having a gawk while they were taking the kids swimming. Yeah. Like, yeah. Daryl, stop looking. Like Daryl did that, like he's just like,

he's a few sets on his wife and he goes like just a and it echoes in that tiled space stop hurting like an owl Daryl you're right back there you're bloody right back there

what? no that's not invincible because I almost slipped over I was like why can't you even have a chance, Daryl? Go on, Daryl. Say something to her.

Make a bloody fool of yourself. Go on. See how she takes it. Some stupid old fool like you. ZM's Fletch Warner Megan, the podcast. Someone who enjoys a walk in the bush is Baby Bermuda Raine. Now, she's a self-confessed tramper. Okay.

And she's one of those people that when she's talking, she holds her glasses. I can see this by a picture. You know, they take their glasses and they hold their glasses while they're talking. Does she have a can I speak to the manager haircut? 100% yes. So she was recently tramping in the Tararua Ranges.

She planned on staying at the Roaring Stag Hut. Okay. Which there's a little picture of, and this looks a delightful way, Department of Conservation Hut. Yeah. And she got there, and she came across a young American guy who was brewing beer in the hut. Using water from the nearby river to brew beer.

How? That's a very good question. I can tell what your question is going to be. How long does it take to brew beer? It takes ages. Yeah, I've just Googled. So the actual process of preparing the ingredients takes a few hours, but your beer will need to ferment for at least two weeks or longer,

depending on the type of beer you're brewing. Yeah. So what was he staying there for a couple of weeks? Was he carrying it all out? He carried, apparently, he carried a whole lot of stuff in. Yeah. All the bottles and everything,

but he just got the water from the creek nearby, but everything else he needed. And he just had a brewing operation, apparently was very friendly. And that's the thing, Department of Conservation was like, oh yeah, our ranger met him up there the other week, and sweet as. He had an annual hut pass. So an annual was like, oh yeah, our ranger met him up there the other week in sweat ass.

He had an annual hut pass. So an annual hut pass, you pay a flat fee. You get to stay in huts for a year. Oh, so he can just stay there. Yeah, the ones that don't need booking online, you can just stay there. Yeah. For as long as you want.

And they're only a hundred and something bucks, I think. So way cheaper than rent. Yeah, pretty. But you've got to obviously hike in and hike out for supplies quite a bit. They don't have showers. So he could actually be brewing it for two weeks and just staying in the hut. Yeah. But then why not just, because I saw a lot of comments online and people had said,

oh yeah, they'd run into him on this hike at this hut and they said he was really lovely. Very friendly, very accommodating. Wasn't taking up any more room than he was entitled to. So what, this person has a problem with it? Well she said you wouldn't see somebody brewing beer at the local park. So why was he allowed to do it in a national park? It is weird though, isn't it?

Like just take some, like we took in mulled wine supplies and made mulled wine, didn't we? And it was very heavy. I know. But you know some people will really dig their own home brew. And then he's like getting it from very heavy. I know. But you know, some people will really dig their own home, bro. And then he's like getting it from the river. Yeah. So eight people were planning on joining him.

Again, they had booking. They weren't staying there for nothing. They weren't chipping the system. And she was like, okay. And then, you know, this is, she said they shouldn't be allowed. But conservationists said, well, we, you know, while we wouldn't encourage everybody to turn their local dock huts into a brewing quarters, he's not actually doing anything wrong.

And you're allowed to have a few beers in the hut. And I don't know. I mean, if you're going to hike in all your equipment, and I'm guessing you must have had to do a few trips in. Yeah. Get on them. Almost admire them. Yeah.

So somebody else said this is the first situation just out of Mochawaka. In January, they came across six travellers who had pretty much set up residence

in one of the huts. Yeah. They had been giving each other haircuts. When this lady arrived, they were like, oh, hey, like super friendly,

but pretty much we live here. Welcome to our house. Yeah. Because a lot of them you don't book online and it's first in, first served. So, I mean, if you've got an annual hut pass, you probably could stay in one for all year if you wanted. Just hike out, get food, hike back.

Yeah. Yeah, I'm surprised it's not happening more then if that's a thing. Crosby's Hut, still my favourite hut. And the Coromandel. And the Coromandel. Bit of a hike to get there. But that's the one we nearly burnt down. Yeah.

There's water, like you just fill up, they've got these big steel buckets that are used for taking the ash and that out of the fire outside. But keep one of them for that. The other one, rinse it out, fill it up with water, stick it on the top. You've got a constant supply of hot water. If you had enough food, you could totally live there.

And if you are okay with eating possums and leaves off trees, then you'll have enough food. We've been through car washes. We've eaten fried chicken. We've flown a plane. Not only been on a plane, but flown a plane. Seen a whale. We've done a whole lot of stuff where I have never.

AJ got in touch with us and said he's never ever been on a roller coaster. So it was a quick trip at the weekend. He got to bring his friend Matt and thanks to Air New Zealand's Grab A Seat we went to the Goldie. And is it true that not only

he went on a roller coaster but he also stayed in his first Flash hotel? Yes. I had to tell him how mini bars work. I said, okay,

this is my credit card and we don't eat that food. And I wish someone had told me that because I would have said, as revenge for Fletch doing this to my credit card, please help yourself. Yeah. Oh, my God. So we actually got to stay in the QT Hotel on the Goldie. Wow.

That had the, I don't know if you saw the Instagram story on FBMZM, but the breakfast buffet, I would say, and not even hyping it up or lying, this was the best breakfast buffet ever. Like there were donuts at breakfast. And you've seen some breakfast buffets. I have seen some breakfast buffets. In your time. In my time.

You've not been scared of a breakfast buffet? No. I think I had breakfast there and I didn't need to eat until we landed back in Auckland. Thankfully, though, the breakfast buffet was after the roller coaster because AJ just didn't go on a roller coaster. He went straight for a hyper coaster. So this is the longest, fastest, and tallest roller coaster in the Southern Hemisphere. Crazy, bro.

And you haven't even done Rainbow's End. Nah. Like, what about an A&P show? Uh, no. Not on that front either. Have you done any kind of amusement ride? Um, I've been on, like, log plumes and stuff but nothing nothing of this sort of scale you know okay so i mean looking at this you think you can do this i reckon i could do it let's just do it okay here we go here we go here we go i'm always worried that i'm not like locked in but i

am it's nothing over your shoulders yeah yeah, that is normally like a slow climb up, but that is... Intense. We are climbing at a rate. And we're in the front and we see everything in front of us and there is nothing at the moment. We're just looking straight up. Oh my God, okay, we're about to drop over

and there's literally nothing in front of us. Holy. Oh my God. Oh my God. No! Oh my God! Oh shit, oh my God. Yeah, here we go again. It's still going

holy oh my god holy that just kept going i I feel like I'm going to vomit. Like I could feel myself lift off my seat so much. Oh my god. I have to see that video because I don't remember most of it. How was your first rollercoaster, mate? Oh my god. It was incredible, but shit scary.

And he joins us on the phone now. It was not that roller coaster, but it was a subsequent one. Because what, you went from riding no roller coasters to riding three different ones in the day, AJ? Exactly. And it was which roller coaster that made you spew? Scooby-Doo. Oh, I love the Scooby-Doo. So we went on the hyper coaster three times just because, you know, why not? And then, yeah, it was Scooby-Doo. So we went on the hypercoaster three times just because, you know, why not?

And then, yeah, it was Scooby-Doo. We were like, oh, we'll just try something a bit more low-key. And then at the end, we walk out the gift store. AJ boosts past us. We're like, oh, he's in a hurry for something. And bombs in the movie world hedge. I tell you, you wouldn't have been the first person to have a bomb in that hedge. Hey, you were quite embarrassed.

It was quite nice because they got on the radio and called the cleaners. Oh, did they? And AJ saw the cleaner walk past and he's like, I'm so sorry. And she goes, it's okay. And it was real lovely. Poor cleaners. I certainly left my mark on Old Movie World. Yeah, yeah.

So you've had a day to recover now. So how was your first ever rollercoaster, AJ? Oh, it was incredible. I'd definitely do it again. Good. Dream out. What was your favourite one, though? I mean, even though you had a wee vom after Scooby-Doo,

what was your favourite? So it's a bit of a touchy subject. So we asked, like, what else can we do? How do we vom after Scooby-Doo? What was your favourite? So it's a bit of a touchy subject. So we asked, like, what else can we do? And one of Fletcher's favourite roller coasters is the Superman. Yeah. He knows this now. Because of your height, you actually can't go on it.

Well, I know. Because how tall are you? 202. 202. So when you turned up at the airport, I was like, um, are you going 202. 202. So when you turned up at the airport, I was like, are you going to be able to go on any of these rides? Because you can't be too short. But you also can't be too tall.

Yeah, because apparently you get decapitated or something. Oh, my God. Yeah, who knew? So you didn't get to go on the Superman ride? No. Yeah, that one's pretty insane. I hate to tell you, that one's pretty awesome. Zero to 102 seconds. It's pretty unreal. But, you know, I insane. I hate to tell you, that one's pretty awesome. Zero to 102 seconds. It's pretty unreal.

But, you know, I don't know if you would have handled that after Scooby-Doo, AJ, to be honest. Yeah. That's probably for the best. Some G-forces there. But, yeah, congratulations. And, again, thank you to Air New Zealand's Grabber Seat as well for getting us over there, for the QTR Hotel on the Goldie,

for putting us up, and for Movie World as well, for letting AJ spew on the hedge. No judgment. No judgment. No judgment. Thanks, AJ. Flesh, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast.

ZM. A study of parents who have named children said that one in seven who named their child after a celebrity regretted it. Regretted naming them after the celebrity. Right. Now, there's multiple reasons.

Yeah, okay. One, because it became too popular. And everybody else did it? Yes, everybody else. And so it became a very popular name. But the other reason is you can't predict what that celebrity is going to do. That's what I was going to say. In the future. They're always going to be popular and that celebrity is going to do. That's what I was going to say. In the future.

You can't predict they're always going to be popular and they're not going to run amok. That's so true because my friend Bill Cosby hates it at the moment. Yes. Yeah, yeah. I mean, when your friend was named Bill Cosby. He was loving it. Lovable family man. Exactly.

Yeah. Not so much. And there was a guy as well that changed his name to Michael Jackson. There have been many Michael Jacksons out there. That's right. He's regretting it now. With this latest documentary and obviously the claims, he's like, ugh. Yeah. And there was a guy as well that changed his name to Michael Jackson. There have been many Michael Jacksons out there. He's regretting it now. With this latest documentary and obviously the claims, he's like, ugh. Yeah.

So naming it after a celebrity is not always a great idea. And we were just talking about this. And Caitlin said that her sister's name is Whitney. And she's almost positive she's named after the late Whitney Houston. Well, you'd think she would be. Have you asked your mum? No, I haven't actually. It must be because when your sister was born,

that would have been like Whitney Houston would have been huge, wouldn't she? Yeah, Whitney's 30. Yeah, right, okay. But that's a long and illustrious career, really. Mm. What? That's the way you said that. Well, I mean.

That's a long and illustrious career. She had a long time to, yeah Was there any famous Megans when you were Nah, but I don't like the fact that like There's other hotter Megans out there now Oh yeah, right You know like Megan Markle, Megan Fox Who else is there that's it really

They're both way hotter than me Yeah right, so you're like damn it But then that's just because Megan was a real, like, 1980s name. It really, like, Tracy and that. Like, you'd put it up there with one of those names that peaked in the 1980s. Would we put it up there with Tracy? I would. Yeah, it's right up there with Tracy.

At least my name's on a sound effect. Von. Von. Okay, okay. It's just trend very lightly. I was just looking up other famous Megans, but there's not really... Why did you say it like that? How many like...

Megan. There would be quite a few like Harrys, Harry Styles, Prince Harry, that kind of thing. Well, your first daughter's middle name is... Was it named after Harper? Harper who? Harper... Isn't it Harper Beckham? No, it just went well with the first name.

But you didn't really hear of Harpers before the Beckhams named their daughter. Yeah, true. Yeah, true. It was like a 2000s name, really. Harper, it really came through there. And Mason after Kardash. Yeah, that really spiked it up. But so for you, yeah.

We would like to know this morning if you're named after a celebrity. And which celebrity? What celebrity are you named after? Yes. Any regrets? Yeah, well, maybe that celebrity has gone down, I don't know, the Me Too road or is just a douchebag and you're named after them and you're like, oh.

Or maybe they're not. Maybe they're just fabulous and famous. Yeah. Maybe people don't even know you're named after a celebrity. Like, it's a name that... Are we taking celebrity songs? Because how many Rhiannon's... Rhianna?

Rhiannon? Rhianna. After the Fleetwood Mac song. Yeah. Heaps. If you know someone called that and they were born in the 80s, they were named after a Fleetwood Mac song. All right, well, 0800 dials at M.

You can text as well, 9696. Are you named after a celebrity? We want to know this morning if you are named after a celebrity because 1 in 7 parents regret naming their kids after a celebrity. Mostly because as most celebrities do, they go downhill.

They have ups and downs. They're only human. The downs are highly publicised and embarrassing. Very high profile downs. They are. Very high profile Downs. So some text messages about the celebrities that you're named after. Somebody said, my 11-year-old son is named after Jake, the hot guy from Melrose Place. That's original 1990s Melrose Place too, not the 2000s reboot there. Yeah, you always want to name them after someone hot on a TV show.

Also, Caitlin, you said your sister Whitney. Was named after Whitney Houston. Well, that's what you think. Why? What year was she born? 1988. Yeah, just because I Wikipedia'd. All of her big songs were like 87, 88.

At the height of conception. Mum just confirmed that she definitely wasn't. She might not have even done it on purpose. They might have been. What was that song? What was 87's Big Whitney Houston? I Want to Dance with Somebody? That's what they were. I Want to Dance with Somebody.

That was their lovemaking music. Oh, yeah. I Want to Feel the Haze. Don't, please don't make that up. She just liked the name. Would have had the cassette tape on to that. Yes. Definitely.

Oh, my God. You flip the tape over. And by the way, we should buy one of those machines that automatically flips the tape over. 87 Bants there. 87 Bants. Somebody else said their 11-year-old is named after Brooke Fraser. Oh, that's a case.

So they're Brooke after Brooke Fraser. Some other. Our daughter is named Demi after Demi Moore. Not Demi Lovato because that would know too. Oh, no. Yeah, maybe before Lovato. Sam, you have three kids. Yeah, I do.

And you've named them all after celebrities. Yeah, I call them my movie star babies. Okay. You tell us their names. We'll guess what celebrities they're named after. Jada. Pinkett Smith. Yep.

Yes. Olsen. Olsen. Olsen twins. Olsen twins. Yep. And Jackson. Jackson. Samuel L. Olsen twins. The Olsen twins. Yep. And Jackson. Jackson.

Samuel L. There's a few Jacksons. His middle name is Samuel. So it's after Jackson on Sons of Anarchy. Oh, yeah. Is that Charlie Hunnam's character? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, babe. Yeah, babe. Yeah, babe. Okay. Not your kid. Charlie Hunnam. Yeah, babe. Babe. Yeah, babe. Not your kid. Charlie Hunnam. Charlie Hunnam. Thanks for your call. Sam, Melissa, you've got a son.

Who did you name him after? Well, I actually named him after Sir Francis Drake. But everybody's like, oh, is he named after Drake the rapper? And I'm like, no. Who's Sir Francis Drake? Obviously, he's a sir oh, is he named after Drake the Rapper? And I'm like, no. Who's Sir Francis Drake? Obviously he's a sir, he's done something. Oh my God, he discovered New Zealand. He was an English sea captain, privateer, slave trader,

naval officer and explorer of the Elizabethan era. Yes, he did. And basically he discovered, I think it's the Bay of Poverty. Okay. Really? I thought we went over to Tasmania. My husband's a big sea history buff, so we named our son after that.

And he's 16 now. And what, in the last, what, eight years, Drake's really popular, so everybody's like, oh, named him after the rapper, huh? And I'm like, uh, no. 16 years ago, yeah. Like, that's so amazing your

husband's like i love you know history and megan wants to name her uh kid after gossip girl yeah nathaniel archibald nate from um he's hot but mr toyboy won't let him melissa drawing the line thanks for your call um oh wait let's go to phil Phil, good morning. Morning, how are you? Okay, guess. Warren, can you guess? Phil. A famous Phil? How about I give you a... Phil Collins.

Yeah, there you go. Phil Collins, yes. Really? Yes, so obviously something goes in the air tonight. I bet you've heard it all before, haven't you? Oh, well, that and a lot more in between. But, so, yeah, everything, like all my legal documents, I'm just a

Phil, I'm not a Philip. Oh, wow. Yeah, so when I was born, apparently, obviously, 93, Phil Collins was at the height of everything, and he had a bit of a receding hairline, and when I was born, had a bit of a receding hairline, like, oh, shit, he looks like Phil Collins. So, there you go.

Alright, Bryce, your baby looks like the lead singer of Genesis. Oh, wow, he looks like Phil Gollum. There you go. All right, Bryce, your baby looks like the lead singer of Genesis. Oh, wow, brilliant. All right, thanks, you cool Phil. I'm named after Boss Hogg from the Dukes of Hazzard, but I'm a female. But she doesn't say what her name is. What's your name? Boss. Boss.

Hogg. Or Hogg. I hope it's Boss. I don't know. My name's Branson. I'm named after Richard Branson. Okay. That's a cool first name. When they were born, probably James Bond

at the height of Richard Branson. Oh, that's right. Richard Branson. I know Richard Branson's rich, but I don't think he's bought his way into being James Bond. He probably could, you know. But there'd be some Pearses out there.

Yeah, there would be. I hope he wears a linen shirt. And sandals. Yeah, as James Bond. No, as Richard Branson. My 10-year-old has a friend called Miley and is named after Miley Cyrus. That would be about as young as you got with about as old as you got with a Miley, wouldn't it? Because they would have been naming them after when she was on

the kids TV, right? Well, no, because now she's been around for... No, no, no, because she was posting up the other day. It was like 13 years since Hannah Montana debuted. So, yeah, she would have been. I'm named after Sigourney Weaver because my parents wanted me to be a badass female. And that's very cool.

Jolene. After Jolly, the Dolly part of the song. Jolene! Jolene, Jolene. I almost hate that. Get it every time they mention their middle name. Yeah. Get it every single time. So yeah, there you go.

Many people named after. No bad celebrities there. Well, as we remember the study, one in seven parents regret it. And you've actually found a list, Megan. Of the top names that people dislike because of adult celebrities. What's number one?

Donald I mean, it's not a great name anyway Even before he became president, he was sullying that name, wasn't he? Well, he would have been named after the duck Fact of the day, day people who compete in wheelchair sports. Okay. Who have suffered spinal cord injury, meaning that they're paralyzed from a certain part of their body down.

Could be legs down, could be chest down. But this is a way, and this has been officially recognised as cheating by the Olympic Paralympic, the International Paralympic Committee. Okay. It was banned in 1994,

but competitors are still trying to find ways to get around it. You might be thinking, how do they cheat? Surely they'd go through the same tests that ordinary able-bodied athletes would. Not ordinary, able-bodied athletes would. Not ordinary. Able-bodied athletes would.

Yeah. Urine tests afterwards. Drugs. So this is called boosting, and it's a method of inducing, excuse me if I say this wrong, autonomic dysreflexia. Right. So basically, in a paralyzed part of their body, they hurt themselves.

Yeah. So that their body boosts blood pressure and their heart rate goes up and they get like a... So it's not even drugs. No. It's hurting themselves. And that's illegal. It's become illegal. They test for it afterwards.

But how do they test? Just look for bruises. No, they test with a systolic blood pressure of 180 mmHg or above, and then they'll be examined again afterwards. And if they've done something to themselves at last, it's a blood pressure that would, in an ordinary athlete who's just participated, it would peter off.

Right. But if you've hurt yourself, then your body, and isn't that amazing? The body can't register it as feeling, but it still knows that something's wrong. Things such as clamping your catheter to ensure the bladder becomes overly full

and the body starts panicking about the fact that it can't expel the... So it boosts everything. Yeah, so everybody like, you know, when you need to go to the toilet really, really bad and you're like a little bit like, panicking and you're just like, I've got to get this done.

Overly tightening the leg straps. So the leg straps that hold them in the wheelchair. Four things like wheelchair rugby. Just as tight as they'll go. So the body's like, this is unnaturally tight. Even though the pain can't be registered with the brain. Electric shocks or stresses to the feet,

legs, scrotum or testicles. They're going to taser and they're just like straight in the, shocks or stresses to the feet, legs, scrotum or testicles. They're going to taser and they're just like straight in the... But you wouldn't feel... You would feel... I would have thought you would have felt an electric shock. Because it goes through other parts of your body that would register the pain. But it doesn't. Maybe it just goes straight through the nervous system.

But because that doesn't have a connection, the spinal cord injury means that there's a severed connection. Right. But still your body's like something's not right there. And so. My scrotum has just received a vault. And so you can't get around this because when they test you afterwards. Your body.

I mean, maybe the shocks dissipate. But this one, they wouldn't because this isn't something that can just go away. The other, one of the other main methods, breaking a bone. Usually in the ankle, foot or toe. Who's doing that? Just crack. And it gives them this competitive edge because their body goes into panic mode. They fight a flight and they fight and they get amped up and their blood pressure goes up.

And it's officially recognised as a form of cheating. But what if you got hurt during the match? Yeah, that's what I was going to say. What if you got tipped over or someone ran over you? True, and you couldn't feel that pain and your body would still... That's why my body's registering this. Yeah. Maybe you've got to kind of say, hey, look, I'm...

They would note that a little bit. But then are people going to do professional fouls where you like... Hurt the other person if it gives them a competitive advantage. Yeah. Maybe not. So they started looking into this because they were finding out people were doing it. And there was all these like really dangerous side effects that could happen. Obviously, if you put your body under that sort of stress, you could be more prone to

heart attacks or strokes. Right. Somebody had a cerebral hemorrhage. Just to win a game of whatever it is. Somebody was putting their body through such regular stress when they were playing these games that they gave themselves a form of epilepsy. And somebody else had hypertension, hypothermia, which is the opposite to hypothermia.

Your body overheats. And so, you know, they monitor it. Wow. Okay, so it's really dangerous. Yeah. Imagine just being like, all right, time to play a game of World Trio Rugby. Ha-cha! Because you're like breaking your foot and just being like, can't feel it, but my blood pressure's on the rise.

So today's fact of the day is electric shocking your scrotum, breaking your foot, or overly tightening your leg straps can lead to you being disqualified in wheelchair sports. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Now, on the weekend, I went to this new, this new cafe that all the kids are talking about. It's both it and co business. Turns out Megan's there. I go there.

Megan's working. What are you doing here? She owns it, it turns out. Side hustle. For those that missed out, you and Mr. Toyboy started a cafe. Yeah, and in case you're wondering, we own it and we work at it. It's our little baby. So it's not just like, I don't know. Because someone messaged in and asked if Megan was struggling and needed a second job. But no, it's actually her cafe. it's not just like I don't know Because someone messaged in And asked if Megan was struggling

And needed a second job But no it's actually her cafe It's a labour of love It's actual labour Which is awful You're actually putting in A lot of hours Yeah

Because it's your baby Well she came out of the kitchen To talk to us She got What? Talk later Back to the kitchen Mr Toyboy

Yeah Oh yeah His slave driver My best friend Ali was there Yep Who's also Megan's Mild acquaintance And Caitlin's flatmate My best friend, Ali, was there. Yep. Who's also Megan's mild acquaintance and Caitlin's flatmate. My best friend first. And she tried to talk to Megan and Andrew was like,

can you guys talk later? There's work to be done. Let's order up. Oh, my God. Mr. Toyboy was really like, I think. We were flat out, though. Megan kind of likes being told what to do by Mr. Toyboy. I'll tell you that much.

That's how it came across to the visiting couple. Yeah, see, you think I tell him what to do, but it's quite the other way around. There's been a role reversal. Right, okay. The student has become the teacher in their role playing. I haven't had a chance, but I'm hoping to get there this weekend, but I'm having some arguments with Megan already, and I don't know.

Because, Fletch, you're the worst customer. You already decided what you want to eat before you've even got the menu. Well, how is that bad? I always... No, you look at the menu and then decide. You know what I get? Scrambled eggs, bacon, sometimes no bread. Bacon steaks. You can't have look at the menu and then decide. You know what I get? Scrambled eggs, bacon,

sometimes no bread, You can't have that. Yeah, and creamy mushrooms. Fletch, a chef has handcrafted that menu. Why don't you try something a little bit different?

There's lovely flatters on there for you. I'm surprised he's not coming to your place and asking for a butter chicken. He'll be like, I want a side of this, a side of that.

Or a bad tie. Good lord. Right. Okay, so there's only... but you don't do sides. No, we don't do sides. What kind of cafe doesn't do sides? Well, I've got a specific menu. You pick something off there.

Now, you can do a side of mushrooms if you would like. Yes, I would. Okay. Well born. Actually, I don't know if I want you there. You're too picky. You went for the first time. Well, I went.

First gripe, too far from my house. Here we go. Wait, I don't know if I want you there. You're too picky. You went for the first time. Well, I went first gripe too far from my house. Here we go. Wait, I'm not comfy. It was a drive. It was a drive. Yeah, okay, right. It was a drive too far from my house. I mean, you're supporting a friend.

Go closer. You're supporting a good friend here. I mean, yeah. It was quite far from your house. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, no, I went. I can't move it closer to you. Who else has been?

Has Caitlin been? No. Has Anya been? You live within bloody Kui too. No. Me and producer Ellie from Drive have got a date there on Saturday. James, have you been? No.

So much support here. On the first from the show. So much support from the show. No, I'm coming when it's not as busy. You gave us literally two days. You wanted to go out of business so you could go. No, no. I just thought I heard it be too rushed.

I've given you literally, what, three whole weeks to come. Yeah, but this next weekend's the first free weekend I've got. And then after this review from respected food critic Vaughan Smith, they'll only be busier. Because I've got good things to say. I'm going to come on a weekday when it's not as busy. We're at work. We could probably justify a work trip there, I think.

All right. Get Ross's credit card that I've got a photo of on my phone. So what did I have? Beaufort eggs. Beaufort eggs. They were good. It's our special eggs. They were very, very good.

There was dust on the top. Now, this dust is made from biltong. Which is mixed. Which is like a jerky. It's like a South African jerky. Yeah. Very good. Eggs were great. The eggs were like

soft. Yeah. And it had a bit of run. But not too much. But not too much run. Oh yeah, good. Because you know some people get a bit funny about how runny the yolk is. Those are pasteurised. They're cooked for an hour and a half and it's 62 degrees. That's about it.

So they stay silky, but even though they're a little bit runny, they're pasteurised. Really good. All warmed through. That sounds very fancy. Bacon steaks. On board with a thick bit of bacon.

I shan't be saying no. And the bread that I had on mine, Turkish P-Day. Top notch. Turkish P-Day. Even though we're a bit angry at the Turkish Prime Minister, but we still like his bread. We like his notch. Turkish P-Day. Even though we're a bit angry at the Turkish Prime Minister, but we still like his bread.

We like his bread. We like his bread. Sade had the Benny. Your take on the eggs, Benny. This has a chicken patty situation. This is what I think you'll be best to go for when you go. Okay. Because it's got chicken and then eggs on top.

It's like a mother-daughter outing for chickens. It's circle of life. Yeah, it really is. And that was, and Sade had this coffee with an orange slice in it. You might be thinking that sounds like madness. It was actually quite yum. Okay, right. I had the cold brew coffee, ticked to that as well.

Okay. All good. So how many stars? The kids, I haven't got to the kids. Okay. The kids menu has kids scrambled, cheese toasty, French toast. So August had the kids toasty, kids cheese toasty. Loved it.

Loves cheese. Indy had the eggs, and this would be the only criticism we have of the whole place. Oh, here we go. And you told us you wanted the honest truth. Yeah. And the rest I loved. I couldn't fault. The kids eggs, Indy said this too, and she's very, she likes plain food. She said it needs some cheese in the eggs I loved. I couldn't fault. The kids' eggs, Andy said this too, and she's very,

she likes plain food. She said it needs some cheese in the eggs. Right. That's a good idea, actually. That's because whenever I make scrambled eggs, it's pretty much 50-50 egg to cheese. But you can't guarantee that the kids will like the cheese. Kids are fussy little assholes.

I'll tell you that much. I can't even put any garnish on them because the kids will be like, I don't want green on my eggs. Exactly. They don't want the parsley garnish. But cheese is the all-pleaser. Yeah.

Well, that could be an optional added. Cheesy eggs could be an extra option. Yeah. Although you don't like optionals. But the hot chocolates were on point. Because I tried a bit of everybody's everything. I hope you did. Which if you're a dad, you pretty much end up doing at the end of every meal anyway.

Because you're like, well, that's not going to waste. Pass it here. Blah, blah, blah. You eat it. Right. But everything. But top notch. And the sweet treats Blah, blah, blah. You eat it. But everything, but top notch. And the sweet treats,

I got a ginger slice. Oh, God. Amazing. I got a ginger slice to go. The donuts were all sold out. It was heartbroken. Yeah. And I got one of Ray Ray's chocolate chip biscuits as well.

Oh, good. Because I made those donuts from one of us, especially because I knew Augie and Indy were going. I made pink unicorn fluffy donuts. Yeah, and I was like, we'll get one of those on the way out

and they were so popular. So you just got all of this for free? No. I paid full price to support my friend's business venture. Did you not give them all a staff discount? I didn't give them

all a staff discount. Am I getting a staff discount? No. You're not staff. You're the worst customer. You're going to come there, create your own dish and then ask for 50% off.

I was thinking more like 20%, like a friend discount. Like a GST, 15% off, like you got the GST. You want me to pay full price? Oh, my God. Or I could be having porridge at home for free. Let me know when you come in, because I'm going to have to warn the girls out the front. I'll be like, okay, which is on its way.

And they'll describe him, and then he'll come in, and they will have been expecting some, like, 80-year-old baby boomer. He's going to want mushrooms with his eggs. He's very particular about his way. And they all describe him and then he'll come in and they will have been expecting some like 80 year old baby boomer. He's going to want mushrooms with his eggs. He's very particular about his eggs. Oh. Yes.

No, I can't wait to try. So that sounds like a five star review. Four and a half? No, but you give them a four. Yeah. And then you've got something to work for.

Leaves them chasing. Does the toilet door lock? I had a bit of trouble with the toilet door. It does. It's a straightforward push across lock. Yeah, but then there was one of those upy-downy engaged. Oh, no, that one doesn't work.

Just the top one. Okay. Okay, well, there sounds like some customer confusion there, Megan. There's some work on. Yeah, some work on that. Okay. Fletchforn and Megan, the podcast, ZM. Weird question, but are you guys rocking a mouse pad?

I don't have a mouse because I've only got a laptop. I know, but this is after you've had your carpool karaoke tunnel syndrome. Carpool tunnel. You've got to be careful when you do your James Corden's through a tunnel because you might lose reception. Carpool karaoke. When I had a sore neck, the physio said that's all related, and she's like

What kind of computer do you use I bet you use a trackpad laptop I was like yes And she said Buy a mouse for it Because when you're all hunched over And like tighten the You're actually going to buy a mouse

So yesterday I was just editing a video And I grabbed the mouse off The desktop computer Which you might be thinking Why wasn't he doing it On the desktop computer Long story short But I cheaped out When I was buying a desktop computer, which you might be thinking, why wasn't he doing it on the desktop computer? Long story short, but I cheaped out when I was buying a desktop computer.

Don't do that. It doesn't sound like you. It doesn't work. What did I tell you at the time? It doesn't do video stuff. It's like, you turn it on and it goes. You're like, are you still trying to start up yeah you alright mate you're not gonna be

able to hear the videos today I can't even open Spotify you're like well I shouldn't have cheaped out and that was

the difference was only a few hundred bucks yeah you live and you learn you live and you learn but I grabbed the mouse off that

and plugged it into my laptop and I was trying to do it on the kitchen table and it was like bleh and it would just

like jump around the screen and it wasn't you can pretty much because is it a laser or a ball they're all laser now yeah so I just use

I've just got like a big pad that I always write on and it just goes on that like a big like desk like a jotter pad because I've got

a lined refill it's like a lined refill and I always put my to-do lists on there and that's also my mouse pad do you yeah vintage so that's also my mouse pad. Do you? Vintage.

So that's what I said to Shade. What do you use for a mouse pad these days? Because surely no one's still rocking an old, squishy mouse pad with a gel or a thingy. That's her idea for your wrist. No, businesses do. Without got it, they're going to be like, well, we're ergonomic.

We're going to make you sit at a desk for nine hours a day. We'll try to make it comfortable. So I found this thing that we'd cut. I think, to be honest, we bought it when we made our wedding invites. Oh, yeah. And they shipped us that. Yeah, right. And it's big and it's got the lines on it.

And you can run a craft knife on it. You know the kind of material I'm talking about here? No, no idea, Matt. They're usually green. They've got little squares on them. And you can measure how many squares a centimetre so you can cut things. Oh, okay.

So you just use some of that. So I use that and that worked a treat. But now I'm thinking... Well, I mean, all it is is a surface, a square surface. I don't know why

you're so amazed by this. No, but do you even buy a novelty mouse pad anymore with your kids' faces on it? Yeah. You know? Because I think mouses... Mice?

Mouses. I don't know. Then I think mouses, mice, mouses. I don't know. Then they move a lot more than they used to. I don't think they do, but I think it's all the same. You know when your dad does this, he picks it up and... That was when Anna's ball. That was when the ball got stuck. Yeah, but what do you do in the laser now? Just little lifts.

Yeah, little tiny motions. Dad would be like, the ball's not... You'd be like, Dad, I think there might be some fluff on the ball. I literally can't remember the last time I used a mouse. But you've got a mouse in front of you. You use it every day. Yeah, I use a mouse every day. And for my desktop, I've got a wireless mouse.

Oh, wireless. Does it have a charging port or do you have to use new batteries? You can plug in like an iPhone charger. Like one of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm on board with that. Wow. Because whenever your mouse, so your keyboard runs out of batteries. Chugging like an iPhone charger. Like one of those. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, I'm on board with that. Because whenever

your mouse, so your keyboard runs out of batteries and then you can't type in what you need to do. Yeah, because the other day I got up to go for a 3am

wheeze and I stood on my keyboard because I'd put it next to my bed to charge it. I was like, where's my keyboard? Oh yeah, okay,

that's right. Why don't you charge it off the laptop, off the desktop? It's got charging fans. Because I don't

have a cord plunked in there. Oh, you don't have a spare cord? Yeah. Can't have a rug cord. Never enough of those either. Never, no. I've got like maybe 12 Samsung sort of-esque chargers at my house.

Yeah. Two devices that need to be charged. The USB ones. Like I'm running absolute minimal iPhone chargers. Yeah. Anyways, yeah, no one's using a mouse pad. Is that what we've said all along? Yeah, just use a pad.

Might keep using the cutty board. Sure. Where does the footage work? Really good. Or just like a cereal box. You could use a cereal box and just cut a pad out of that. Like one of the side panels? Yeah.

Like Weet-Bix. You could have a mouse pad of Weet-Bix. You're welcome. No. I don't think so. At least get a yummy cereal. Yeah, like Froot Loops. Buy one box of Froot Loops

and be like, kids, enjoy this. Dad needed a mousepad. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. The podcast. If you enjoyed this podcast, why not give ZM's free and Clinton to listen to?

Subscribe on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. And music lives here. ZM.