ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - April 23 2018

Episode Date: April 22, 2018

Vaughan was mistaken for a Shortland Street star in the weekend, Community Notices and when did a celebrity death hit you hard?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, brought to you by Spark. Capture life like never before with the Samsung Galaxy S9. I told you you should have done it, Megan. No, I tell you, that was great. ZDM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan. Hello, good morning, welcome to the show. Fletch, good morning, Megan. Thank you, Anya. Good morning. What was the wording on that story,

read Jacinda Ardern's next big task? She flies back into the country from her week in Europe ahead of her next big assignment, giving birth in June. All right. Back on home soils. Trying to squeeze a baby out of my vagina. I'll just really knuckle down on doing whatever I need to do to do that. God, I really hope that it's June 23, my birthday.

Oh, no, you don't want that. Overshadow is your day. I know it's my birthday. Oh, yeah, that's true. Yeah. Or the same as August's birthday. I don't want it to be June 15. That's the last thing we need.

That's the last thing we need. Again, that'll overshadow a birthday. Yeah, it would give me another link's the last thing we need. Again, that'll overshadow a birthday. Yeah, it's, you know, it would give me another link to the Prime Ministerial position. I don't know if I've ever told you guys, but we went to school together. I probably haven't mentioned it. Well, all this talk

of birthdays, Double Date starts today, this morning at 8am. Your chance to get your hands on the $200,000 cash. We're going to give you $100,000 if we can match your birthday with the other caller on the line exactly. So day, month, year. So even if you just get through with the same month as the other caller,

and you will because we'll spin the wheel, we'll spin up the month, that's $100 straight away. Yep. $1,000 if we can match the day and then the $100,000 each. If it's exactly the same year. Imagine if we did it on day one. $100,000 each. Oh, it'd be great.

Yeah. I mean, I'm not a statistical person. Would we run out of money, though? Maybe. I don't know. Well, it happened once. Great news. Done.

All right, you lot, listen up. It's story time. All right, story time. Three news headlines for three news stories are that I've found. Vaughan and Megan, you must pick one headline only. Headline one, overwhelmed postie found with years worth of mail.

Headline two, duck snapped twice for speeding. And headline three, 12-year-old doesn't like the word no. Does a duck fly past a speed camera? That's so good. How fast is a duck flying? Well, I'm guessing above whatever the speed limit was. How fast can a duck fly? How fast can a duck fly? Because I've seen them like go go for it. But I always, I've tried on my bike. You know those signs and it's like, it's not a speed camera, but it's a sign. It's like, hey, hey, you're going 65.

Oh, yeah. Slow down. Slow down. It's like, you can't tell me what to do. You're not a policeman. You're a solar powered sign. And yeah, I've tried on my bike to get past 50, but I can't. Oh, yeah.

No. On those, the ones. It's like 30. On the street. Can you set've tried on my bike to get past 50 but I can't oh yeah no on those the ones on the street can you set them off on your bike why is that bad you're casting a wide shadow there buddy

because I always when I had a scooter I always used to try to see how fast I was going on the scooter but I was never a big enough item to kind of be picked up

you can get I just use my iPhone oh yeah yeah that'll work because you know map my run there's a bike one I don't know what it's called bike my run or something I'll read you. You can get, I just use my iPhone. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That'll work. Because, you know, Map My Run, there's a bike one. Is there? I don't know what it's called, Bike My Run or something. No, why would you run if you had Map My Ride?

Map My Ride. Yeah, that's it, that's it. Same people do it. And it gives you the speedo. Ducks can fly, most of them can fly between 40 to 60 miles an hour. So, like, getting up towards 100 k's an hour. Yeah. And often they'll migrate on a tailwind

and with a sort of an 80 kilometre tailwind during an eight hour flight, they can travel 800 miles. Wow. That's insane. Who knew? Ducks, eh? Who knew?

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Bonus. I like story number three. No. Because the postie got overwhelmed. That happens quite a bit, doesn't it? The postie got overwhelmed. Was that the headline?

Yeah. Overwhelmed postie found with years worth of mail. Right. So you want 12-year-old doesn't like the word no? Yeah. Okay, we go to Australia. Australia. Yeah, and I've got to hand it to A Current Affair. This is the greatest ever hook-in for the episode of A Current Affair,

which screens tonight in Australia, because they have teased us with enough information that it's a great story, but we need the ending to this field. Okay. Because there is a 12-year-old boy named Drew, not his real name. They've used Drew for this story. And he doesn't like the word no.

He got into a heated argument with his mum and he decided to do something drastic. Now, this is in Australia. He stole his family credit card. I'm guessing he went into mum's purse or dad's wallet when they weren't looking.

And he took it. He then found his passport and booked himself a flight to Denpasar, Bali. Now bear in mind I said he was 12. Very, very Australian. So he figured out he could fly

on multiple Australian airlines alone without a letter from mum and dad. The only boxes he needed to tick was having a valid passport and a student ID. So he had both of those. So he said to his mum and dad, I'm off to school.

He packed his backpack. What was that last part? No, babe, bye. He packed his backpack along with his scooter and took a train to the airport. He checked in through self-serve checkouts and made his way through the security gates and waited to board his flight to Perth,

which would then connect him to Bali. And he admitted later, I did kind of stuff up because I got the cheap deal. He could have just gone direct. Drew's mum reported him missing after he never made it to school. But it was too late because by that time the 12-year-old had made it

from Perth to Denpansar filming a video of the clouds while he was in the air. When the plane landed, he was there. Now, thinking he'd already booked himself into the All Seasons Hotel... Of course he had. Clever boy. He jumped on a go-jek bike. I don't know what that is.

A go-jek. A tuk-tuk. A tuk-tuk maybe. Arrived at the hotel, he checked himself in telling staff that his sister was coming and he was just checking in early. This is some Home Alone 2 lost in New York shit right now. And then the last line of this article

you won't believe what Drew got up to over the next four days. You need to tune in to our current affair, 7pm tonight. Four days in Bali. He's 12. He stole his mum's credit card. I bet he had a couple of bintang. Isn't that it? Derek and he bought a bintang singlet?

Derek and he bought a bintang singlet. Wow. I feel like we're going to need to follow up the story tomorrow. Oh, wow. What a great yarn. Screening tonight on A Current Affair in Australia. You'd never wish that it was your own kid that did that. No.

Overseas, in my personal experience, Australian kids are the worst. It's just Australians. At family resorts, they're just like, what are you doing, Daryl? I'm going to jump off this waterfall into the pool. It says no jumping off the waterfall, Daryl. Shut up, Mum. Do what I want.

Okay, well, if you break your neck, don't come whinging to me. I'm going to be at the bar having a my toy. Stuff off, Mum. I hate you. I hate the bar having a my toy. Stuff off, Mum. I hate you. I hate you too, Daryl. That's almost a word-for-word reenactment of what we witnessed in Fiji. Don't jump up there. You'll break your bloody neck.

I won't break my neck. I hate you. You're telling me what to do. I'm going to go get braids. Don't be so bloody stupid. You'll look ridiculous. I'm just doing it now because you said I can't stuff you, mum. I'm booking it on the room.

Wait, is Daryl getting braids? Yeah, Daryl got cornrows. Oh, no. 12-year-old punk-ass bitch. Of course he did. At Nottingham Trent University, have discovered what different body parts say about people, including their intelligence, their personality

and their health. Okay. So, I think most of these are just women. Sorry. So, the different body parts on women, what they say about them. Apart from a couple of very obvious differences, the bodies are pretty similar. We've got arms, legs. Yeah, so maybe you can put this for both men and women.

But there is one about boobs, which I don't think that you can... I mean, you can have moobs, I guess. Yeah, okay. So, blue-eyed women... Oh, Caitlin, this is Caitlin. This is producer Caitlin. She's the only one, only female...

Well, you don't have blue eyes, eh, Anya? Green? No, I've got blue. Oh, and Anya. Okay, both of them. Blue eyes. This isn't true. Blue-eyed women are supposedly brainier. Oh, and Anya. Okay, both of them. Blue-eyed. This isn't true. Blue-eyed women are supposedly brainier.

Oh, yeah. According to researchers. That's definitely true then, yep. Keep going. They're better at forward planning, but they can't figure out why. Just all the research that they've done, they've found that... Blue-eyed women are better... Brainer.

I've got green eyes. I'm pretty brainy. Um... Help. Huh? What? Blue-eyed women are better. Brainy. I've got green eyes. I'm pretty brainy. Help. Huh? What? What? No, sometimes it's better just to let it go.

Yeah, I agree. Well, you can't lie with science. You can't lie with science? Argue with science. You can't argue with science. I would say that about anything. Women with long fingers are sexually adventurous. Oh, look at you, stumpy fingers.

Oh, don't have stumpies. What quantifies long fingers? Yeah, I don't know. That backs up the stories we've heard about producer Caitlin. Excuse me, what? That I'm brainy but not sexually adventurous? No, you've got long fingers. Does she?

I don't have long fingers. Oh, they look long from here. Oh, maybe it got long fingers. Does she? I don't have long fingers. Oh, they look long from here. Maybe it's quite skinny. The scientists just look at me and think this is a woman. I'll just study her. Yeah. Next. Yeah.

Broncs are better in bed, but brunettes earn more. Oh, my God. I'm both of these because I'm naturally brunette, but now I'm a blonde. Yeah, but a bit of peroxide's not going to change your starfish technique, is it? Okay, we've made you blonde, now you're not allowed a starfish. You're not allowed a starfish.

One day, I'm going to give you more details than you want. Just so you stop calling me a starfish. No. Oh, it says women who dye their hair blonde Feel more confident Less inhibited Inhibited Yep And more sexually excited

Right But brunettes are more likely to be in long-term relationships And earn more So there you go, Katie That's you But I'm not in a long-term relationship And I earn nothing So

Maybe in the future You need to get a sugar daddy I do There you go, Katie. That's you. But I'm not in a long-term relationship and I earn nothing, so. Maybe in the future. You'll never get a sugar daddy. I do. I do. With those long fingers of yours and the blue eyes. One for Anya, redheads hate the dentist because they feel pain more. Yeah, I've heard that before.

It takes like 20% more anesthetic to numb the pain for redheads. Oh my God, it says here it takes redheads 20% more anesthetic. See, you guys think I make up a lot, but it's all just jumbled up in there. And I've read the reasoning for it, and it's some insane reason. Really? That yeah, anesthesia doesn't have quite the effect. Have you noticed that? Not so much with the dentist, but yeah,

definitely with all injections and needles, I feel like I'm more scared than the average bear. Wonderful yoga bear reference. I'm just looking at all the girls. I don't think any of us have large noses, but this one's just people in general. Okay, one of you does.

Workout hood. I've always been self-conscious about my nose. Is it me? Turn sideways. I know, he is, right? Nah, everyone here's got pretty cute noses, actually. It's a pretty cute-nosed show, I'll say that. So people with large noses sneeze less.

Really? Yeah, because it's an effective filter. So all the pollen and pollutants and everything can get through better because you've got a big nose. So if you've got a small nose, sneeze more. Okay. Large boobies, Katie, are linked to a higher IQ. See, guys?

Smart and higher IQ. Large boobies score 10 points higher on IQ tests. See? Generally. That's not me either. So they're nungas, eh? They're the key. Here's one for me.

Stubby toes. It doesn't say webbed toes. It just says stubby toes. If you have stubby toes, you apparently run faster. Oh. Probably not me. That's weird.

I don't know why that would have... I thought longer toes would have been better because you get more of a grip in the spring. A bit of a spring, yeah. Short toes help people sprint faster due to them being less in the way. I could have been a national runner if my toes weren't so long.

Long legs reduce the risk of diabetes. Is that any of us? Not really. No. I do have a weird... I've got long limbs. Oh, you of us? Not really. No. I do have a weird, I've got long limbs. Oh, you've got long chicken legs. I've got long arms too.

I'm orangutan-like sometimes. And long arms are sexy. Yeah. I just said I had long arms and that was before I knew they were sexy. You read this list, didn't you? No, I didn't. You knew the stats.

Right. You knew what was sexy. Fletchborn and Megan's Community Notices. Hello and welcome to Community Notices, a segment of the show where we have a look at what's happening around the country according to your local Facebook pages. Let's start with a couple of animal posts. Animal posts, always very popular,

whether it be a stray dog, a missing pet, a found pet. Yep. Or a dead pet. Oh. And it's a dead pet that we start with. Oh, boy. From the Kumu Tahopaki Huapai Riverhead community. Now, that's a large, geographically, that's a big area to cover.

It is. It's an info slash sharing group. Just wondering if anyone has a digger that can bury my neighbour's alpaca as it has passed away. If you can PM me and let us know how much, that would be great. A digger. Yeah. Here it comes with a weird comment, though. Matt writes, I can pick it up, will be used and not wasted.

Is Matt going to eat the alpaca? Because they do eat alpacas, right? South America. Right. Most creatures can be eaten. They can be used. They eat guineaacas, right? South America. Right, yeah. Most creatures can be eaten. They can be used. They eat guinea pigs, don't they? They love guinea pigs in South America.

And we shouldn't shun another culture's eating of an animal. If that animal's treated right, right until it's eaten. I mean, we eat animals. Just bony, though, wouldn't it be? Like, lots of bones. I don't know. Probably be a lovely pelt. But then was this somebody's pet? Don't know. Probably be a lovely pelt. But then was this somebody's pet?

I don't know. Yeah, that's... You'd kind of rather give it a respectful digger-based burial, wouldn't you? Yeah. Go down to Kennard's Hire and get a big digger. That would be my thing. It would be a great excuse. I'm always looking for an excuse to pop down and hire a digger.

I've always wanted to hire a mini digger, Vaughn. Yep, I know. Yeah, and this would be just like... I'd be like, oh, no, the alpacas died. I'll go to get the digger. Oh, you guys mourn. I'll hire a mini digger, Vaughan. Yep, I know. Yeah, and this would be just like, I'd be like, oh, no, the alpacas died. I'll go to get the digger. Oh, you guys mourn. I'll be back. So hard when you live in an inner city apartment.

There's never an excuse to hire a digger. Hiring a digger, yeah. I mean, you could. You've got that little park over the road. I reckon you could get a good couple of hours digging before anyone asks two serious questions. As long as you're wearing a high-vis vest. From that page, we go slightly north to the Hibiscus Coast page.

Lucas, very concerned. Someone keeps on shaving my grandma's cat. And I have to say, we are not very happy about it. She lives in Orua. And I would like to say that this is a very strange behaviour. And we'd be much appreciated to whoever you are to stop it. Thank you. Included are photos of said shaved black cat.

Oh, my God. Oh, wow. That's a whole back end. Do you think this is somebody's like, this cat's making a menace of itself at their house. So if I shave it, maybe the people who own this cat that I can't track down will keep it inside and keep it out of my business. Maybe, but has it had an operation?

Is that why it's shaved? No, but then they wouldn't be asking. It's shaved. Right. They would know if it out of my business. Maybe but has it had an operation? Is that why it's shaved? No, but then they wouldn't be asking. No, it's just shaved. Right. They would know if it had had an operation. If your vet's doing that much of a huckery shave job when the cat's getting an operation, you might want to have a word. That's sad. So I don't know why they're shaving the cat. The cat's being shaved.

To the Papamoa link page, Kiri asks, has anyone down Papamoa East had an Irish lady at their door asking for wine? Oh, page. Kerry asks, has anyone down Papamoa East had an Irish lady at their door asking for wine? Oh, okay. Suzanne says, my neighbour did.

She said it happened on Friday night. And Karen said, no, but I've got an Irishman living in my house constantly asking for beer. Hashtag husband.

Bunter. Bunter. But no, no further information as I could see it. Okay. About this mystery Irish woman. Was she drunk already or was she sober?

Well, are Irish people ever really sober? If so, they're not truly Irish. This comes from the Backpacking New Zealand page. Now, all names have been blanked. Okay. All names. So the poster's name, blanked. But it says, be aware of the backpacker with the name blank, blank.

Yeah. Now, the first name's a big blank and the second name's a little blank. Oh, okay. She has given me the sexual disease of chlamydia. Okay. There's a backpacker out there spreading the clap. Right. I mean.

It takes two to tango. It takes two to tango. It takes two to tango. Always practice safely. But then to be so unashamed to publicly post, this person gave me chlamydia, thus I have chlamydia. Watch out for me as well. Yeah. On the Backpacking New Zealand page.

Oh, yeah, I never thought about that. Yeah. But then they're taking one for the team. They're warning. They're saying, let my fault not be yours. Okay. That's nice. Those are today's community notices.

If you see anything on your local page, be it chlamydia related or... Anything. Dead alpaca. You can send it to our screen cap and send it to FVMZM on Facebook. FVM. ZM. It's funny what studies come out these days. This study is being done on sex and sex with a new partner.

So the first time you do it... Yeah, I was going to say, how many times do you do it before someone's considered a new partner? No, this is the very first time. Wow. So maybe you really like them and you're doing it for the first time. Maybe it's just you've just met them and you're doing it for the first time. Maybe it's just you've just met them and you're doing it for the first time. But the study has revealed that most people have rubbish sex the first time. Oh, 100%.

And it's not a good indicator of how compatible you are. No. This is a great sales pitch. I haven't been single for a long time, but this could have come out in 2002 if it had liked. Yeah, right. This survey found that 58% of people in relationships now say the first time they did it with their partner, it was awkward or terrible. Because you're nervous, aren't you?

Yeah. I don't know. Is that an excuse? Carry on. Excited? Nervous? Oh, there was not many a time. I won't say many because no one's going to believe many,

but there was a couple. Okay, there was like many a time. I won't say many because no one's going to believe many, but there was a couple. Okay, there was like one time where a young lady may have said, let's go back to my place or go back to your place. And I'd say, I'd let her know, I'd be like, it's going to be terrible. No, but you shouldn't. It's a proviso. It's to let them know I don't want them expecting anything. Right.

Expectations low. The first three times are going to be below. I like how you're assuming there'll be three times. Oh, not one night. Not one night. No, no, no, right. Expectations low. The first three times are going to be below that. I like how you're assuming there'll be three times. Oh, not on one night. The next five will be have. No, I mean on three different, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's what I'm saying. If you can forgive the first, let's call it, terrible mistake.

So then it breaks down. We'll get there in the end. The top five things that people worry about before doing it. Yeah. So there's a top five for men. So what do you... Pubes. Oh, that's not on there.

Top five things you worry about, like going into it for the first time. Breath. What do you worry about? Okay, you're listing things that aren't on there. Pubes and breath aren't on there. Banging teeth. No.

Because you know when you first start kissing someone and you don't know how their mouth works and you might like butt teeth. But like when you establish a kissing, you know when you first start kissing someone and you don't know how their mouth works and you might like butt teeth. But like when you establish a kissing, you know, way to kiss. How did you get your wife? I don't know. It's an absolute bloody miracle. Number one for men is actually pretty cute.

It's pretty cute. Do you want me to go through? Cuddles. Length of time. You're not going to guess, Fletch? No, but what do you like worry about going into it? What I'm worried, I don't know. How long they're hanging around afterwards? Like Well I'm worried I don't know.

How long they're hanging around afterwards? Like when I should order the Uber? Is that what you're saying? How rude it would

be to block them on Facebook before they've left the house? Number five is STDs. Four, what my body looks like.

Everybody worries about that don't they? Number three, pleasing your partner. Number two, how long you're going to be doing the marathon for. That would be my, that would be, I would have thought my number one worry. And number one is, actually, it's pleasing your partner.

So number three was a different way of saying that. Right, okay. Okay. Like if they're going to enjoy it. That's pretty selfless for men. Yeah, it's pretty cute. I wouldn't have expected that to be so high. Women, five, experimenting with different positions.

They're worried about that. Oh, like that. Four, not being adventurous enough. Worried about that. Don't worry about that. Three, STDs. Don't worry about that first time. Don't get too adventurous.

They're just stoked to be having sex with you. Yeah, they're just stoked. They're really stoked. Two, pleasing your partner. And number one is what their body looks like is the biggest concern for women. Right. Right.

I'm still so impressed with guys. Pleasing your partner is number one. That's the key to the second time, isn't it? You're ensuring that there is a second time. Guys are always worried about, you know, the future. Future proofing. Future planning. Can I get this again? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I like this.

That's why number three is such a problem. I liked it a little too much and it was all over a little too quickly. You were quiet, Fletch. Well, I didn't have anything to add, really. Oh, okay. Just that guys are selfless lovers, obviously. So selfless. Even now, all theseless lovers. Obviously. So selfless. Okay.

Even now, all these years later, I'm still selfless. Yeah, you're like, what do I look like? He's like, oh God, don't look at it.

Don't look at my pimples. She's not going to be pleased if I, oh no, it's done. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. Today's Top Six deals with Top Six

faux meat products that will need new names in France. The French have passed law through their parliament that meat terms will not be allowed for vegetarian products. Vegetarian sausages, for example. They will no longer be allowed to call things vegetarian steaks or burgers. Or what about nuggets? Fillets also off the list. I don't know. I don't know about nuggets. I can't see nuggets. Soy milk will

no longer be allowed to be marketed as milk. Okay. And tofu and that won't be able to be marketed under any sort of meat name synonymous with meat. If it's not of animal origin, it can no longer be called butter. Is this because in the future and in the next 10 years, there will be quite a lot of artificial meat?

Well, apparently they think it's misleading to people who think they're buying sausages. We all know, though, don't we? Yeah, people aren't reading, apparently. You know if it says soy milk, it's not from a cow. It's not. Yeah, it's not. I mean, we know this, Megan. Okay.

I really do know this. The top six faux meat products are going to need new names and some name suggestions I've come up with. Okay. Number six, there's a vegan alternative to fish fillets called fishless fish fillets. Right. They're going to need a new name,

and I suggest crumbed paper mache thing. Imagine that's kind of what it tastes like. That's what it tastes like, yeah. Paper mache, rolled in some crumb. Number five, smart jerky. This is a vegan jerky. Now, jerky's dried meats. Yeah.

Isn't it? Yeah. So smart jerky, and my name's suggestion to change it to Chewy Vegetable Leather. Oh, no, because leather's a meat product. Oh, Vaughan, now you haven't thought that one. What about Fruit Leather? Chewy Vegetable Straps. Straps.

Yeah, Straps. I've gone on Straps. Number four on the list of the top six faux meat products that will need new names and their new name suggestions. Meatless chicken patties are a vegan substitute for chicken patties. Right. But they've got chicken in the name. Meatless chicken patties. I am on their new name suggestion, sawdust veggie circle things.

Those are actually yum. I've tried those once. Do they taste like sawdust? We have here. No, it tastes like... Texture like sawdust? No. Wet sawdust.

It's like veggie kind of tasting. And tofu usually, right? Ooh. It's a little bit bad. If you don't like tofu, you've just not had it done right. You've just not cooking it right. You're sounding a little bit ignorant. No, no, I've tried these things.

Oh, yeah, okay. You've tried all of them. I don't like tofu, though. You've tried a meatless chicken patty. Yeah, I didn't like it. It was dry. It was like a

poorly cooked chicken. Right, okay. Number three on the list of the top six faux meat products that are going to need new names.

There's a vegan product on the market called Meatless Meatballs. Okay. That is going to have to be called balls's a vegan product on the market called Meatless Meatballs. Okay. That is going to have to be called Balls from now on. Just some balls. Just balls.

Just balls. Like, just juice. Just balls. Just balls. Ball balls. Number two on the list of the top six phone meat products that are going to need new names

and some new name suggestions. There's Veggie Bacon Strips. Okay. They look like bacon. They're made to look like bacon, but all vegetable products. And my name suggestion for those is no, no, no, no. Don't you

dare. No. No. It shouldn't be allowed to look like bacon either. No. How do you ever get that texture? Misleading. You wouldn't be able to. Well? Get the texture. No. No. You tricked me. How do you ever get that texture? Misleading. You wouldn't be able to. Well. Get the texture. No.

No, no, no, no, no. It's half the fun of bacon. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. And the number one foamy products that will need new names and a new name suggestion. Number one, Amy's Veggie Sausage.

Okay. Now, Amy's is apparently a vegan brand. Okay. And this Amy makes a range of things. Right. But Amy's Vegan Sausage, the new name I suggest for this product is the reason Amy isn't invited to barbecues anymore.

And that's today's top six. A couple of high profile deaths over the weekend. Avicii died at 28 years old. Not quite sure what caused that yet. They haven't... No suspicious circumstances, but his family have flown to Sweden to try and figure out, or no, to Oman to try and figure out what's

going on. So the other one was Verne Troyer. Verne Troyer passed away. Mini me. Mini me. Verne Troyer. 49. 49 years old, which is older than I thought as well. Right. But that was really sad and I was like, oh man, you know, that's sad. I really like those Austin Powers movies.

And I did. And I stand by it. Yeah. And when they first came out, they were top notch, top notch films. It dragged a little in when, you know, like your dad's mates started saying, fancy a shag. That was a surefire way that it had done its course, you know. And then like people were still doing Austin Powers at a fancy dress party.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe almost ready for a retro resurgence. Maybe, yeah. Maybe. But I was like, oh, that's sad. And then I saw someone share a video, and it was when Dr. Evil and Minnie Mae are in prison in Austin Powers, and they do hard knock life. Yeah.

And I was watching it, and I was laughing. life. And I was watching it and I was laughing. And I was like, man, that is really sad. And then I read this interview with him that he did once and he said, some people are like, are you okay with people laughing at you? And he said, well, as long as people are laughing, that makes me happy. And I like to think most people aren't laughing at me,

they're laughing with me. I'm always having a good time doing what I'm doing and people laughing and having fun is the most important part of it. I was like, oh, that's so cool. And it hit me a little bit harder. I didn't cry. I didn't cry. But the Verne Troyer, because everyone was like,

oh, I was really sad to beat you, Dodie, you were so young. And that is terrible. That is sad. But for some reason, the Verne Troyer death really hit me a lot harder. Really? That dude cracked me up. Have you seen when he got given a mini Tesla?

No. Because he was small. He could fit in kids' cars. Yeah. You know those little cars kids drive around? Yeah. Tesla gave him one

that had like a Tesla. Yeah, right. Is it? Battery and engine and everything in it. No, he loved it. He did Skids in it and stuff. It was awesome.

You should look it up. It's a great video. Right. And he was just having fun and he was tearing around. Right. And he had it just hit me Skits and that and stuff. It was awesome. You should look it up. It's a great video. Right. And he was just having fun. And he was tearing around. Right. And he just hit me harder than I thought it would be.

And I was wondering if anybody else listening was surprisingly hit by, because I wouldn't have even said he was like one of my favorite celebrities or favorite actors or anything. But when I heard he died, it was like, got me a little bit. Way more than I expected. And I was wondering if anybody listening has had the same thing with a celebrity death. You didn't. I've never been not moved to tears or anything.

Is that what you mean? No, no, no. Well, maybe. That would be the extreme end of it. I'm not expecting that. But just when it surprised you how much, you were like, oh, that's. Megan?

I don't want to be mocked. No, it was someone cool, but I didn't actually like... We aren't going to mock you. We're not going to mock you. Oh, no, that's not like you at all. We wouldn't do that. No, I actually got like... Safe place.

It was... I was going to say... It was a musician. It was Nelson Mandela, wasn't it? No. Is he dead? Is he dead? Yeah.

Oh, okay. Oh, for f... Remember Hillary Barry kept flying over to say that because they were like, he's going to die. He's one of those people that keep popping up and use things and I get confused

whether he's still here or he's not. No, I get that because I forget who's dead or not. People have died, right? Yeah. Now, Samantha is most definitely dead.

No, it's a really cool musician and I listened to one of these songs when they died and I was like, oh, that's really sad. Who was it? No, I'm not going to tell you. Whitney Houston.

No. Because that was sad? I don't want to be mocked. Who was it? Michael, I'm not going to tell you. Whitney Houston. No. Because that was sad? I don't want to be mocked. Who was it? Michael Jackson. David Bowie. Oh, that's fine. David Bowie was there because it was a big surprise.

David Bowie's death came from nowhere. He released a new album. Really, really sad. Yeah, that was sad. And because I grew up listening to him and stuff and he was like mega cool. Yeah. They're like, I shed a little tear for Bowie. He actually cried.

Yeah, but like listening little tear for Bowie. She actually cried. Yeah, but like listening to one of his songs. Yeah, that's musicians will get you though because like when they've passed, the songs take on a whole new meaning. Yeah.

Yeah. And so you can. Okay. So 0800 dials at M, 9696. When did a celebrity death hit you hard? Maybe you were just

crying uncontrollably. Maybe it was at the end of a vulnerable day. You were feeling a little vulnerable. And the news hit you hard. Maybe you were just crying uncontrollably. Maybe it was at the end of a vulnerable day. You were feeling a little vulnerable. And the news hit you. And you're like, oh my god, what? And then you see, it's a hard night for us. And he's dancing around. Or maybe you find out

a celebrity's died way after they actually have and then that hits you even more. Like when I found out Pavarotti died years later. The opera guy. Yeah, like when I found out Pavarotti died, like years later. The opera guy. Yeah, he's dead. Is he dead? Yeah.

Oh, no. Who's the blind one? Bocelli. Oh, no, he's alive. All these spaghetti-sounding names are very hard to keep up with. All right. When did a celebrity death hit you hard?

0800-DARLS-AT-HEM-9696. We're talking about when a celebrity death hit you harder than you perhaps thought it would. Mini-Me got me yesterday. Mini-Me got me yesterday. If you haven't heard the news, Mini-Me, Austin Powers. Vern Troyer passed away over the weekend,

apparently suffered from depression. You know, making, and he said his greatest joy is making everybody else laugh. You know, but he couldn't do it for himself. So we're talking about when a celebrity death hit you harder than perhaps you thought it would. Yeah. Jennifer, which celebrity death hit you hard?

Robin Williams. Yes. And do you know what was sad about that was he was always first to make people smile and laugh. But he was quite sad at the end, wasn't he? He was. He was struggling with himself and life. Yeah. I was not okay with it because he always made me laugh. And then when I read it, I was like, oh, no. I know. He was struggling with himself. He was struggling with himself in life. Yeah. I was not okay with it

because he always made me laugh and then when I read it I was like, oh no. I know, he couldn't make himself happy, he made everybody else happy but he couldn't do it

for himself. That was quite sad. And how bad did you... It makes me sad now thinking about it. So were you just an uncontrollable mess? Yeah.

I went home and I told my mum and she was like, are you okay? I'm like, I don't think I'm okay. Oh. We don't know them personally,

but you get quite an emotional attachment sometimes to these people. Yeah, I used to watch Mrs Doubtfire all the time when I was a kid as well. Classic. It's a classic. Hello there. Jennifer, thanks for your call. Thank you. Courtney, whose death hit you hard?

Michael Jackson was the one for me. I remember the morning that happened. I remember when it happened. Really clearly. I remember exactly where I was. I was in class and we were doing a test and someone came into the room because everyone at school knew that i was obsessed

with them so um one of the girls came in and told me and i was like nah nah can't be true and so my mom works the dead end so i was like she'll know yeah and am i your mom so i called her and she's like no no no babe no no he's just in a coma. It's not true. Like, it's all right. Just chill. And then so I Googled it. I used a little proxy so I could get on to Google at school. I went to Marinsville as well, Vaughn. So I was at Marinsville.

We didn't have Wi-Fi when I was at Marinsville, if that helps. So I had to break through the proxies to get on Google. Okay. Yeah, and so he was dead and I just lost my shit. I had to break through the taxis to get on Google. Okay. Yeah, and so he was dead and I just lost my shirt. I had to leave. You had to leave school for the day. I'm sorry, I saw. Oh, no.

Did you make up an excuse to the teachers or were you just like, no? They knew. No, I told them they knew. They knew this was a huge moment. Yeah, so I had to leave, walked home, made a stop at the warehouse on the way home so I could get a bunch of his albums that I already had. But I bought them anyway as tribute.

Wow. Oh, Courtney, that's so sad. That's tough. Oh, bro. R.A.P. R.A.P. Michael. Does it still cut you to this day? It does, it does.

I'm still got them on repeat all the time. Oh. That's sweet. All right, Courtney, thank you. Glenn, what celebrity death hit you hard? Oh, mate, Steve Irwin, the Crocodile Hunter. I remember that clearly as well. That's one of the big ones.

Do you think, though, that we kind of had prepared ourselves over the years for his eventual demise at the Jaws of Wildlife? Yeah, but I thought, you know, he was like kind of the whisperer to animals, and I thought they had a bit of a respect for him until that old Stingray got the better of him. He frightened it, to be fair, and he wouldn't have wanted us to blame Stingrays. No. But I think I hadn't prepared myself for Steve's death, because the first time you saw him tango with an alligator or a crocodile,

you're like, he's a dead man. And then he survives, and you're like, this guy's unstoppable. He's unbeatable. How bad were you though, Glenn? Did you cry? I didn't cry, but I actually met him in real life at the Australia Zoo. And that's why I guess it hit home a little bit harder for me because I actually met the guy and he was awesome.

He was awesome in real life. You always hear that about Steve. All right, Glenn, thanks for your call. Some text messages. Some other text messages. And some blokes are really opening up to us, and I appreciate that. Yep. And they're saying, I really got hit hard by Paul Walker's death.

Oh, yeah. Paul Walker was a huge shot. Somebody said I was on the way home from a hunting trip when a good mate said, hey, mate, I got some bad news. Paul Walker's passed away, and I had a little bit of a cry in the truck. Still hard. Think about it. And then he said when he saw the end of that Fast and the Furious movie,

Paul Walker goes left and Vin Diesel goes straight. Yeah. Gets them all over again. Chester Bennington from Lincoln Park. Oh, yeah. That's right. That was out of the blue. Last year, wasn't it?

Nobody really expected that. That came from nowhere. Yeah. You know, we're hearing a lot from Princess Di fans. R was kind of out of the blue. It was just last year, wasn't it? Nobody really expected that. That came from nowhere. Yeah. You know, we're hearing a lot from Princess Di fans. R.O.P. Princess Di. A toast to Princess Di. And somebody, quite a few people as well, this guy says, I'm a big Māori fella.

Yeah. 20 stone big Māori fella. Okay. Father of two. But boy, when I heard George Michael had died, did I get misty-eyed and have a little cry. Still get a foggy eye whenever I hear Careless Whisper. It is.

It's a classic. Guys, I've got a bit of a project on the go. Making a table to fit my barbecue, my kettle barbecue in. So out on the weekend I'm out in the garage, door up sanding with a belt sander, which is lots of fun. Is that my sander? No, I'm out in the garage, door up, sanding with a belt sander, which is lots of fun.

Is that my sander? No, I don't have your sander. Did you give it back? Yeah. Your orbital sander. Do you have a sander? It's an orbital sander. No, this was a belt sander. What have I got? You've got an orbital sander. Is that a circle? It goes around like that. And it just moves fast.

The belt sander is the business that spins around on a belt, gets through it real quick. Because I had a hole in my wall and I had to fix it. And then I was sanding and I was like, oh, my arm's getting real sore. And so I went back to Bunnings and I was like, what's your cheapest sander? Because I'm lazy.

He classically did what, and I'm sure males around the world do, buy power tools for a small job that really doesn't require it. That was real exciting. You know, but then I got to lend it to you. So it's been used like twice. I've definitely given it back though. Yeah, excellent. I think you've lent it out. Yeah, definitely. really doesn't require it. It wasn't real exciting. Yeah. You know, but then I got to lend it to you. Yeah. So it's been used like twice. I've definitely given it back though. Yeah.

Excellent. Are you sure? Yeah, definitely. I don't have it. So I'm belt sanding. Okay. Finish that off, dusting it down.

The table's looking great. Yeah. Now, as I said, the garage door's open and our garage is quite close to the road and I hear a car pull into the driveway. Okay. And then I hear from the car,

someone's like, oh, it's Shortland Street. And I'm like, immediately in my mind, I'm not on Shortland Street. That's my initial reaction. They're in my driveway and there's no one else out. But people do confuse you. With Ben Barrington. So that's my immediate second thought.

I am not on Shortland Street. But then I quickly go to, oh, God. They think it's Ben Barrington. Because people will say that. Especially if I wear a suit, because I don't often wear a suit. Especially if I wear a suit because I don't often wear a suit. So if I wear a suit, I look like him being the doctor. And I'm like, oh. You go, we have made light of this before.

Megan's rolling her eyes, but we did do this. No, because I'm just like, you say people confuse me, but how many people have actually confused you? Oh, no, no, like they'll say, is that at a quick glance? Not like it doesn't get too in-depth. So I'm like, oh God. Okay.-depth. So, is she on the street? I'm like, oh, God. Okay.

And I turn around, and you know who it is? It's Ben Barrington. From Shoreland Street. From Shoreland Street. And your driveway. And my driveway. And I go, hey, Fletch. He's like, no, the other one.

I was like, ah, okay. Just bald brother confusion all around. Yeah, bald brother. Everybody's just wildly confused And we have a bit of a chat I'm like Do you want to come and see this table? He's like

Can't stay Gotta go Do you want to come and see this table? He was like What you doing? Cause like I was like something was up Cause I had stuff spread everywhere

Yeah And a belt sander Okay And I was like Oh do you want to come and look at this table? And he's like Oh no I can't stay mate Gotta go I was like Alright See you later, do you want to come in and look at this table? And he's like, oh, no, I can't stay back. Got to go.

I was like, all right. See you later. How do you want to see your table? Even could he have pretended to be interested for like a minute? He could have pretended to like have a minute. Yeah. Just come in and be like, even if he was like, oh, yep. And then I could have explained where I'm aiming to end up with the table.

But he was like, can't go. Got to go. My wife heard the whole thing. She was sitting in the lounge with the door open. She comes in, she was like, who was that? I was like, it was Ben Barrington. She's like, what? But he called you short of the street.

And oh, and then she claps. She's like, oh, it was one of your fun little games. Was she like, did he not want to come in for a cup of tea? She said, I wish I'd seen it. Or I said to her, I wish someone had been walking past at that time. It would have been a really confusing moment to see these two bald dudes

with beards yelling at each other. Are you just stoked that he spotted you at your most manliest? It was pretty manly. I was covered in dust. Fletch. Vaughn.

And Megan. The podcast. Almost 4,000 people in New Zealand have been studied in their driving habits. So Fletch doesn't have a car. He doesn't drive. Oh, you drive sometimes New Zealand have been studied in their driving habits. So Fletch doesn't have a car. He doesn't drive.

Oh, you drive sometimes. I have a license. You have a license. People are shocked when they see me driving or they've heard that I've drived. Driven. Driven. I've drived. And they're like, why do you have a license? I'm like, yes, I do.

It's scary, though, if you get in a car with him. I've never had a crash. But you can participate for the times that you do drive. Okay. Okay. So the thing that everyone's, like, shook at... Okay. ...is that one in six New Zealanders use their phone

when they are stopped at a traffic light. What's wrong with that? That's still illegal, isn't it? Because you're still, even though you're stopped, you're still not allowed to be on your phone in the car. Yeah. What if I put the park brake on, put my car in park and turn it off? At the traffic light?

And hop out. And sit on the bonnet. No, then you're just a nuisance. I think by the time you've done that, the light's going green and you're going to hold up some cars. I think that's a lie. That's got to be more like five and six. It's got to be more than that. It's got to be half. That equates to 16.9%.

It's more. No way. Total lie. Even if you're having a cheeky look at the screen without opening it, that's still using your phone. I did it at the traffic lights the other day and have you ever had a policeman go boop and then just look at you and go no?

Did you get a bop? Yeah. Have you had that? No. They just do a wee boop. It's like your dad going oi. Oi. And you're like you're down the other end of the house and you do something and your dad's just like oi! Down the hallway and you're like. Imagine if your dad had one of those.

Yeah. And that's happened again. Remember when that plainclothes cop car was beside me at the travel lights and he held up that sign that says, I'm a plainclothes police car. And I was on my phone. He held up a sign. Yeah, he had it on the passenger seat.

Held up a sign and was like, no. You shouldn't carry a sign. That's a dead giveaway. That's also no different than using a phone. He's still using something. It's taking his... Being distracted. Distracting.

What about producers? Do you use your phone when you're at the traffic lights? Obviously. Well, Marker's mum will be like, are you driving? And I'm like, no,

I'm at the stop sign. I've stopped. And my wheels aren't moving. Yeah, exactly. So you think it should be... I think it's out of whack. I think it's more. I think people are lying. It's definitely, yeah.

And the handy thing is, the person behind you will let you know it's gone green with a friendly toot. It'll just be like a little toot toot. Not harming anyone, are we? No. It's fine. Yeah, if anything, you're just actually helping traffic by leaving a bigger gap.

Joined in studio by the first person eliminated from Survivor NZ, Yosefine, good morning. Good morning, guys. Oh, it's not over. It's really happier than last season's first eliminated contestant. Oh, that's right. She was miserable. You've got to take it in your stride.

I mean, it's a badge of honour, really. It's a compliment to you. They identified you as the strongest competitor. Yeah, it took me a while to sort of realise that and tell myself that, but yeah, definitely. Well, you shook my hand before and it hurt, and I would have eliminated you as well. Yeah, she's a threat from the start.

Yeah. You're not the first guy to tell me that. Like, the vice-like grip. No, it was good. I just... It's Monday. I'm all on me. No, it was good. I just, it's Monday. I'm all on me. So was that the plan going in?

Like, come in hot, be strong? Absolutely not. No, so the only reason it happened that way is because I thought I wanted to be social and I wanted to get people to trust me and like me and want me around. So I thought when he said a reward challenge to start the game, I was like,

what a good way to come in. And whatever it is, whether it's food or shelter, be like, everyone wants to be on my tribe because I've won that for them. But then he says, pick your tribes. I was like, Chiz, you've really done me over a little bit. No, but you picked your tribe and then they voted you out. That's not fair.

No, that's a reflection of me, really. Clearly, I just, I like, it's so hard though because A, you didn't see that coming and B, you barely know these people and you don't know anyone's real game plan, because some really intimidating-looking people who you think are strong and playing it that way are more strategic, and then some of the weaker people that you think are super sneaky

are actually really straightforward people. So you just, you can't, I don't know. Clearly, I did it all wrong, so, I mean, otherwise I wouldn't be here. Can we quickly talk about the game where you had to find the bag in the mud? Yes of course. Because it looked like everyone was going to kill each other. I know and the show honestly didn't do it justice. I remember standing there with my team watching it and I was like this is going to be amazing. I can't wait to see this cut out because watching it start to finish I was like everyone looks so good. It's just like rustling around in

the mud and it was ruthless like those poor men were actually in there so much longer than the show reflected. And they were so exhausted. But none of them were going to give up. So they ended up being in these holding patterns just squeezing each other for maybe like five to ten minutes because they were too tired to actually move but no one was going to give up. Mud is

insanely exhausting to find yourself in. Like a mud run. You're like, oh I can run around that pig and back. And you get out there in the sink and you're like, help me. Take me now. You don't actually see it, but when I do my amazing little run to the mat, I lose a shoe in there and I wasn't allowed

to go back in and I was like, that's my only shoe for the whole game. Please can I have it? And they were like, no. Yeah, well they were just like, no, I sort of like, I may have been a bit of a diva afterwards. I was like, you give me nothing in this game, the least you could do is help me find my shoe. And they did afterwards and it was fine.

Okay. How long do you actually go without food? Because everyone's like, we're so hungry. Like, how long were you actually without food? Three, I did not eat anything the entire time I was on the show. So everyone's asked me like, did they like actually sneak you like maybe a protein bar or something before? I was on the show. So everyone's asked me, like, did they, like, actually sneak you, like, maybe a protein bar or something before? I was like, no, no, they fully left us out there with nothing.

And all we had is what you see, which is a machete and a tiny bit of rope. And we were just hungry and tired. I'd be so hangry. Yeah, you wouldn't. I'd be exactly what they want on that show. I'd just start going off at people. Yeah, people that know me, they're just like,

we can see you go from day one where you're all bubbles. Even though I still look pretty bubbly to some people, by day three, I was a broken human. Was there anything else about eating the other competitors?

No. Me and Liam, the thing is, obviously if you watch the show, Liam and I are equally in the dark. Everyone thought we were an alliance together because we would go off and chat, but we would literally go off and talk about cheeseburgers

and stuff like that. And we didn't have any chat like that, but we were just like, nah, everyone's sweet, eh? You haven't heard anything? Nah, mate. Nah, sweet. Yeah. Everyone likes us. What a happy family.

Well, if you missed it last night, you can catch up on demand. TVNZ 2, the second season of Survivor, and it really has gone up a notch, hasn't it? Oh, it's insane. And this is the peak of the iceberg, honestly. Yeah, right. Well, thanks for joining us. I'm sorry you were first eliminated, yo's.

Oh, I'm stoked. Don't worry about it. I got it. Flash forward, me goes double update. You were born to win. Megan, you spun up October. Oh yes, I did. October is the month for the very first

double date this morning. Alright, so playing this morning, Shannon and Claire, how are you? Good, thank you. I've got them both on at the same time. Shannon and Claire, $100 cash each, just for having a birthday in October. Just like that.

Now, Claire, let's start with you. What part of the country are you in? I'm in Auckland. In Auckland. What about you, Shannon? I'm in Goa. Oh, they sound the same age. They sound the same age.

They sound the same age. They might be born in the same year, but that's the final step. That's the final step. Because first we've got to get through what day in October they were born. Do they not sound the same age to you, Megan? I don't know. It's hard to say. I mean, I don't know. One might sound like more down for business, and one might

be more like fun. Oh, you know how people are always sounding down for business? Everyone, stop sounding so down for business. One of them sounds a bit more serious than the other. So I don't know if that's making her sound older. Now, there are many ways we can utilise our cone of silence and we can ask one how old they are

or we could just do it at the same, we could do a three, two, one and then reveal it. I want to do a gunslinging Jill today and I want them to both say it after we say go. You want to do that. But we've got to establish to get it to say it at the same time. Do we go three, two, one, and then say it? Reveal. Yeah. Okay. Where I would say

zero or go, you reveal what day in October you were born, okay? Now, just remember, if you match the same day, you win $1,000 cash each. And advance to the next round to win $100,000

each. Alright. Are you guys ready? Yep. We're going to say 3, 2, 1 and then you say... You say the day. Okay. 3, 2, 1. 11. 31st. Literally

right at the end with the 31st there. Halloween baby. Halloween there. Halloween baby. Halloween. A Halloween baby. Well, Shannon and Clee, you win $100 cash, but unfortunately not $1,000 cash. Okay, thank you very much. All right.

And one of them sounded more serious, Megan, because one of them was a Scorpio and one of them was a Leo. Okay. See, I called it. Was that the down-to-business Scorpio? That was classic. Classic down-to-business Scorpio. Classic Scorpio.

You know what I mean. I was made aware over the weekend that Harwooder Cinema 2, this is a cinema complex in Harwooder, worth how many screens? Two screens. Are you allowed to say Cinema 2? Like you'd just say Harwooder Cinemas, wouldn't you? Like when do you start putting the number in there?

Oh, yeah. So I'd say Harwooder Cinemas, I'd start say how would a cinema's, wouldn't you? Like, when do you start putting the number in there? Oh, yeah. Surely at least start at four. I'd say how would a cinema's, I'd start at three. Right. Because then cinemas could be, you know. Yeah, right.

So they've got two cinemas. You'd call it a Jill, I don't know. A duplex? No. It's just weird. There's not enough cinemas to have a number next to you.

Right, I see what you're saying. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, you're like sort of four upwards. Four upwards. And then they start sounding impressive. If you've got a of four upwards. Four upwards. And then they start sounding impressive. If you've got a multiplex cinema. Four upwards.

And then what time, when do you stop saying it? Because there's a place with like 12 cinemas, but they're not bragging about their size anymore. What do they say? They just say it's cinemas. Oh, right. Okay. They're not like cinemas 12.

If you're constantly changing it every year though, like Super Rugby, that used to be like Super 12, Super 14, Super 15. Okay, you should just call it Super Rugby. Yeah, okay. Or maybe, has there always been two in Harwood? Are you familiar with Harwood as Cinema? Yeah, I think so, yeah. Well, there's been two. Okay.

Just call it a centre, a cinema centre. Why can't they just call it Harwood as Cinema Centre? Why can't they just call it Harwood as Cinema? Because I think Te Ao Moodoo is one of these offenders as well, showing off. I think they've got three. Maybe they've downsized to two. Okay, right.

I don't know. You're right. It's not enough. It's not enough. You get to a level where it's too much. Once you've got more than ten, don't be bragging. Okay, yeah. No one likes a show-off.

So we're the New Zealanders here. We don't like our puppies being too short or too tall. We're like a medium-sized puppy. They have, on their Facebook page over the weekend, have put up just a friendly reminder that we have a dress code here at Harwooder Cinema. It's really simple. As long as you're appropriately dressed

and wearing clean footwear, you're good to go. Please no pyjamas, onesies, dressing gowns, or dirty gumboots, no matter how cute they are. Okay, I'm sorry, but dressing gowns? Oh, that got you. Dressing gowns. No, because at least with pyjamas, you're fully encapsulated in clothes. And you can get a formal pair of PJs.

Yeah. See, I think there's some formal PJs that might look better than casual wear. Whereas with a gown, you're more likely to have a slip, aren't you? No, I'm assuming they're not naked underneath the dressing gown. What are they wearing under the gown in your mind? More pyjamas? Yeah. More PJs. They're like a pass the parcel of inappropriate wear for

the Harwood of Cinema 2. Take off your robe, PJs. Take that off, silk boxes. And a onesie, that's alright, isn't it? You're going to the movies, the comfort's important. You'd be hot in a onesie, that's all right, isn't it? You're going to the movies. The comfort's important. You'd be hot in a onesie, though. You're going to a public space. Wear proper clothing.

You know? Clothes that constitute, like, proper clothing. Oh, okay. Queen Elizabeth II. No, but even if it's track pants, like, at least it's got a waistband. Yeah, that's true, mate. Wear a waistband. So your rule for going to the cinemas is you should always have a waistband.

But then you can't wear a dress. But pyjamas do have a waistband. Oh, yeah, okay. A nice stretchy waistband. Okay. Wear clothes that you would wear in, well, I was going to say in public. It's just not okay. You've slept in those.

Yeah, that's true. But what if they're clean? Yeah, but then who's... What if you've got formal going out pyj that's true. But what if they're clean? Yeah, but then... What if you've got formal going out pyjamas? How do you run a check? Because I would never, year round, regardless of temperature, I sleep in boxer shorts. But what if I bought a nice pair of formal PJs

for a winter run to the market? If you're wearing something that you're okay about dribbling your dinner on, it's not okay to wear it outside. Because I'll be happy to dribble my dinner on track pants. And I've also worn them to the supermarket on a Sunday morning with gumboots. Because it's just the easiest thing to get on and off. Do you know what? We talk about this.

And you'd say that this would be a fashion crime, right, Megan? Yeah, 100. What if you found out that a member of our team had committed such a fashion crime? Is it Vaughn? No. Surprisingly. surprisingly no it's not internania tell me what is it what you bought over the weekend what did you buy some ugly bits oh no official brand official ugly boot brand ugly boots if, you've got to go hard or go home. No. No, no. What kind? Tan? No, I thought about the tan, but then I found this beautiful ink navy colour,

which I just thought would go with more items. Yes, Mum, you're going to look great on my soccer sideline this weekend. Are these for slippers? At home? Okay. They'll be worn on the couch to nip down and get some eggs if required. No. Not the full week's grocery shop. And to Harvard or Cinema 2. And I think to the movies week's grocery shop. And to Harwooder Cinema too.

And I think to the movies. To Harwooder Cinema too. In your pyjamas. I'll be going to Harwooder Cinema. We always talk about our fashion choices. I'm very upset by this. I shan't apologise for being comfortable, Megan. Here she is.

We're getting into the winter months, the comfy months. Ugg boots aren't supposed to be worn outside. They have a hard sole. No, but it's foam. It's not made for any moisture or dirt because it's like a sole. I'm hearing what you're saying. I'm hearing what you're saying. And then everyone wears them too much and their feet get slanty.

Slopey boot. You've got to get rid of it when it starts slanting. And wherever the weight on your foot goes more, it wears out the Ugg sole. And you get a lean Uy boot. You've got to get rid of it when it starts slanting. And wherever the weight on your foot goes more, it wears out the Ugg sole. And you get a lean Ugg boot now. It's time to replace your Uggs. Or get them resold. You can get them resold. Are you okay with this?

I wouldn't. I wouldn't. So, no. Don't you... You owned a pair of slippers. No, I don't own Uggs or slippers. No, I don't. No, you don't.

I'm okay with Uggs as slippers, but they don't leave the house. Uggs don't leave the house. Come on, people. Only if it's raining, they don't leave the house because it'll bugger the suede. It'll bugger the suede and your foot will smell like a wet sheet. You've already been confused for your boyfriend's mum once. Are you prepared and willing for this to happen?

And that was in proper shoes. Yeah, his car will break down. His latest shit-ass investment of a car will break down and you'll have to go pick him up. You'll be like, I told you buying this car was a bad idea. And you'll ring blue Ugg boots and they'll be like, shave, your mum's telling you off. I'm all for, I've just never found a pair of Uggs in my size.

Thank you, sir. Well, look, you know, if your feet decrease in size, you're more than welcome to borrow my navy inks. Snug into a pair of navy inks. Great. I shan't be seen with you in those. Fact of the day is about applause Okay

When you applaud somebody at the end of a wonderful performance Why? That's great, you guys did that without Like I was going to say everybody applaud as if we were applauding somebody Oh okay, well we're just You're just on to it Ready? Do it again, okay. Well, we're just on to it. Ready? We're on to it. Do it again. Do it again. Applaud.

Are you watching how I do it? See how we're all clapping at our own time? We're not doing it. No, because if you clap, it's like a chant if you did it all together. Today's fact of the day, in Russia, Norway and other northern and eastern European countries, it's actually protocol

to clap in sync. But then it would all just be like everyone going... This is us applauding at a New Zealand thing. And most places in the world. But in Russia, Norway, and other northern and eastern European countries, you applaud in sync.

No! I don't like that! Faster, faster, faster! And then you go... No! I don't like that. Faster, faster, faster. Then you're like, yeah! And you go... I don't like that. But who did they go, one, two... No, you just, you read the crowd and you adjust.

God, I've got no rhythm. I know, you'd be out. You'd be burned out of Russia. What's that song that I always mess up? Oh, Florence and the Machine. You know that Florence and the Machine one? Where it comes with the clap? It's like... Oh, and the...

Oh, yeah. All of them. And the friends. No one told you life was gonna be this way. You always do too many. You do too many and too fast. But yeah, in Russia and all, it's just the done thing.

You clap and sink. Which would be so weird. Like you say, it's just the darn thing. You clap and sink. Which would be so weird. Like you say, it's more like a chant. Drink, drink, drink. And you can't help but get faster because maybe that's the New Zealander. That's stupid. I don't like that. What if there's some people like me in the audience that didn't know that?

You'd cut them on. If someone started doing that, to me, you'd be like, what do you want me to do? I know. Can you imagine being on stage in New Zealand and the whole audience? You'd be like, oh, no way, they want more. They want more. Or is this my 21st? Do I have to drink?

Is this a charge to drink? Chug, chug, chug. Charlie, that's what it makes me think. Weird. It's really, really weird. And I watched all these applause videos last night. My wife thought I was going mad about applause and the different ways of it.

Also, I learned this really interesting thing. If a group of people, if you're in a massive auditorium and you're clapping for long enough, they had this standing ovation happening and they were all clapping. And this group of people knew it was going to happen. There's five of them. So they started clapping in sync.

The whole place synced to their clap. As soon as a group of people synced up their claps, it became like a Russian or Norwegian clap, and they all clapped in sync. So today's fact of the day is applause in Russia, Norway, and some other Eastern and Northern European countries, you applaud in sync. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Malia Obama has a boyfriend, a new boyfriend. This is Barack and Michelle's daughter, Malia. She's 19. She met her boyfriend at Harvard. Now he's British, eh? Yes. His name is Rory Farkuarsen. Show me

how that's spelled. F-A-R-Q-U Farkuarsen. Farkuarsen. Farkuarsin. Far-quarsin. Far-quarsin. No, because I knew someone with the last name Far-quar. Far-quar. Yeah, I knew them as well, but then this was just the first part of that. So Far-quarsin.

Oh, okay. So Far-quarsin. Megan can't speak. No, what's wrong? It's his name. It's like Lord Far-quar of Shrek. I think your pronunciation was wrong the first time. It's his name. It's like Lord Farquhar of Shrek. I think your pronunciation was wrong the first time. It was.

I've never seen that name before. Don't say that again. But they're quite posh. His family's quite posh. They're posh. That's how you say it when you're posh. Farquharson. But when you're poor, you just say it how it's meant to be said.

Okay. When you get a bit rich, you start putting accents over things and changing your name, don't you? You've made Megan cry. So they've sent him a letter. They've sent Rory a little letter. Michelle and Barack wrote him a letter saying, look, mate, I'm really...

Do you think they had that conversation as well? No. Probably when they were like, who do I address this to? And Marley sends him his Facebook profile. Yeah. How do you say that profile How do you say that? How do you say that? No What is it?

So they send him a letter Saying look I'm sorry about this And I'm sorry that your relationship is going to be put under scrutiny And I'm sorry you're going to be People are probably going to dig around to find out who you are Really really sorry about it. But there wasn't anything like, treat her well, back off, if you mess around. We'll secret service you into a lake or anything like that.

No, nothing like that. But just sorry about this. Sorry about the attention that you're going to garner. Oh, that's nice. Which is really nice, right? Yeah. Really nice. Because I can't imagine you, I'd imagine you, when your girls start bringing home boys, you're going to really.

But it'll be like you think about how bad I am with even like friends. If they start seeing a new guy, I'm like, not good, no good. You're the worst. He's like. No good. Yeah, Vaughan's like, oh, they can't spell there. They've used the wrong there. Dump them.

There, there, there. Like you'll judge them on anything though. Look at the sunglasses they're wearing. Not good enough for you. But take it as a compliment that I care so much for everybody that they should be... It's like Caitlin won't even introduce me to people she's gone on a couple of dates with.

Vaughn will be like, show me them on Facebook. No, no, no, no, no, no. But he's looking out for you, Caitlin. No, it's because you're so embarrassing. You'd be like, you'd like embarrass me in front of them. You'd be like, do you see what kind of undies she wears? Something like that. Like, you're just like.

What? I don't know where that comes from. No, if I'm trying to embarrass you to them, it's because they've passed the initial test. Yeah, but I'd never, ever introduce them to you. No, you wouldn't have had to. I'd introduce them to my dad before I introduce them to you. Same. Me too. You introduce him to my dad before I introduce him to you. Same.

Me too. You're worse than my dad. I've out-dated dads. You're very judgmental, Ward. That's great. Well, no, I'm a wonderful judge of character. Very rarely am I wrong. This is true.

Very rarely. So we want to ask the question this morning. When you've started dating someone, you've got a new partner, when did you have a word from their mum or dad? It doesn't necessarily have to be the bad one, the threatening you look after them and there's going to be trouble. Maybe it was

something else that they just wanted to warn you about. Maybe they tried to warn you off their own tense. Oh yeah, that's what my dad did to Andrew. He was like, are you sure about this? She's already had one. Didn't work out. Maybe you should run now. She's hard work. There's no reason one. Didn't work out. Maybe you should run now. She's hard work. There's no reason Oliver should be in this prison.

I'll just track them. Run, run. Save yourself, young man. You're life ahead of you. Alright, so give us a call right now. 0800DONALDZ.ME. You can text 9696. When did you start going out with someone and their mum or dad had a word to you? What did they say? We're talking about when the partner's

parents have had a word to you. Barack uh partner's parents have had a word to you uh barack obama and michelle obama have had a word to uh the new boyfriend of their daughter but not an aggressive one more of a i just want to apologize for the fact that you know we're famous yeah and people are going to be scrutinizing your family and pulling it all apart there was no one that we know of there was no you treat her right. Yeah, you will. You'll end up dead. What are you guys about saying? He used to fly drones with bombs on them using an Xbox controller.

So treat her well, otherwise you'll just end up obliterated. Going for a run in the park and you hear whoop, whoop, whoop. Look behind you like, we're in trouble now. And then before you know it, you're a crater. R.I.P. Somebody said, I'm an artist and my girlfriend wanted me to paint nudes of her because I'm particularly good at real life drawing. Paint me like one of those French girls.

Well, he did. I got a message from her mother saying she does not appreciate nudes of her daughter. This is not art. And you were to cease immediately. I said, I think it's her body, so it's her choice, isn't it? Yeah. That wouldn't go down well. No, you'd just say, okay, and then just ignore that.

At our engagement party, my mother-in-law asked my sister-in-law, at their engagement party, sorry, if she was only with her son for the money. Ironically, he's probably the brokest person I know. Massive scene, massive scene, but they eventually got over it. Right. Somebody else said, the first time I met my Massive scene, massive scene, but they eventually got over it. Right. Somebody else said the first time I met my partner's daddy, I offered to be my dentist by punching my teeth out. So that's

the sort of great aggression that's really going to keep your daughter around in the future, isn't it? Somebody else said in the wedding video, you can hear my father-in-law saying there's still time to run. That's in the wedding video, so that's immortalised forever.

First time I met my mother-in-law, she sat me down and asked me what I plan on providing for her son, and I thought it was a joke, so I laughed. And she said, this isn't a laughing matter, he needs to be cared for like the man he is. And then gave me the rundown on how

I will be in charge of all domestic chores. What, like folding his washing and lunches? That's hard, though, because, I mean, you love that person, but, like, you're marrying the family, too. Like, and you're going to have to deal with her. I know. Wow. That's so bad.

All right, the top six is coming up. Yeah, the top six are renamed, the idea is to rename faux meat products as France has outlawed being able to use typically meat-related nouns for non-meat products. Like you can't call it a sausage if it doesn't have meat in it. So a vegetarian sausage. Yeah. Can't be called that.

Just becomes a stick. And a steak can't be called a steak. Yep. Unless it's made of actual animal product. So we've got the top six products that need to be renamed and some naming suggestions. ZM's Fletch, Vaughan and Megan.

The podcast. For more, check out FVM ZM on Facebook.