ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley - ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Megan Podcast - August 01 2018

Episode Date: July 31, 2018

Tayla from Love Island Australia is on the phone, It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas and what type of picture on dating sties always hooks you in?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is the Fletch, Vaughan and Megan podcast, thanks to Spark. You can stay connected with free Wi-Fi a gig a day on the $19 Spark prepaid rollover pack. Enjoy. Hello, good morning. Welcome to the show. Fleet's Morning, Megan. Strike. Strike. Who? Teachers. They're going to strike. Oh, I thought you meant us. I was like, you should have told us before we got here. Oh, but I thought we should too, just to get behind them, show them some support.

15th will also not be at work. Oh, okay. I used to love it when there was a teacher's only day. How good was a strike? Oh, so good. It was a free day off. I mean, I'm sure mum and dad hated it because they had to find a babysitter. Yeah.

What did your parents do with you? Did they not just leave you at home? They just left me and my brother at home and we'd fight to the death. But there used to be eight of you. That's how you know how many strikes there were during the 90s. Six. Exactly. Only two survived.

Well, my dad worked on the farm, so we just had to help him for the day. Oh, that would have been so you could skive off. You'd just disappear and go and have a sleep in the shed somewhere. Right. But, yeah, I used to love a strike. I mean, I understand now more about why they're striking. Yep. And rightly so.

Now that I've got a child in the education, you know, system, you can see some teachers do some crazy long hours and the pay is not enough and not much. And again, it's not all about the pay. It's about resources and stuff as well. So get on them. Get in there. Get a strike.

I remember being a student at college and being like, yeah, no, you should strike. Like really getting behind my teachers. Have they given you enough? Strike again! You deserve more. I don't think, Megan, you didn't care about the political. No, it's just I wanted the day off.

You just wanted a day off, yeah. Yeah, no, no, no. I feigned caring. I mean, so Pennsley then went to Wednesday's time, the 15th. Yes. They were just going to go half a day, but they were like, you know what? Take a full. Stuff you. Are they doing They were just going to go half a day, but they were like, you know what? Take a full.

Stuff you. Are they doing it on a Friday to make it a long weekend? No, Wednesday. That's the nuts thing. Oh. You always chuck a teacher's only day or a strike down on a Monday or a Friday. Stretch out your weekend. Exactly.

Joining us on the show this morning at about quarter to eight from Love Island. Love Island, Australia. Love Island, Australia. The winner, Taylor. So she was with Grant and then straight after they broke up. So we're going to talk to her about that, how she feels about Grant, how she feels about the show. And we're not going to mention Love Island, the UK version.

Megan still hasn't caught up. And she's annoyed at you. She's pissed at you. I didn't say anything. You did go. I just said Sade didn't watch the final. She looked pissed at you. I didn't say anything. You did though! Sade didn't watch the final. She looked at who won. Don't say it! Don't even say it because you'll

ruin it. Okay. By the way, are we getting on board with Japan's new love island, Terrace House? Is there subtitles? I don't know if I could handle just reading the whole time. Yes, in Japan I don't think we should have to ask them to speak English just because it's inconvenient to us to read subtitles. I don't want to read for an hour.

They also look, like, insanely clothed. It doesn't look like a beach house. It actually looks like a suburban terrace house. Caitlin, your thoughts? No, you need to wear bikinis and no tops for the boys. It's also Japan. I imagine the walls move and they become an obstacle course with wavy hands. No, no, no. That's why everyone loves it because it's completely different to Japanese TV.

Oh, really? The show's setup is pleasant to look at with sleek, minimalist design and furniture. Look. Oh, what? They say it's nothing like Japan's seen on its tellies before because reality TV is always, as you say, jumping through wacky shapes and getting whacked into a pool of jelly. It looks a little bit classy though. It's on Netflix

apparently. I don't know if it's on New Zealand Netflix. Okay. Well, yeah, Taylor from Love Island Australia on with us at about quarter to eight this morning. Alright you lot, listen up. It's story time. Alright, three news headlines for three news stories that I've found

from overseas local news websites. Interesting, odd, quirky news stories. You've got to pick one of the following three headlines. The rest are deleted forever. Headline one, van driver caught splashing pedestrians. You love doing that. I love a movie paddle. Yeah.

Headline two, Fortnite goes adults only. I've heard about this. And headline three, the old baby in a pram trick. What's the baby in a pram trick? Where you pretend something is a baby in a pram. For what though? Oh, and it's brilliant. So what was the first one?

Because I know second and third. Van driver caught splashing pedestrians. Okay, so that's movie puddle. Someone's done that on purpose. Two, there's a porn parody of Fortnite. Yes. I can't remember what it's called. Is it F Word Night?

Yes. But it doesn't... Oh, creative. I always wonder if the people who make these porn parodies have ever watched the original content because this looked really...

I saw a couple of photos from it and it didn't look... Yeah, I mean... Didn't look like they played a lot of Fortnite. They're rushing to be first, aren't they? I don't know.

Yeah. You don't want to be first in that game of life. The third one is a brilliant story. I love it so much. Go. Go. Okay. We go to Texas now and San Antonio where Miss Helen,

it's home to Miss Helen, is a shark that lives in the aquarium in San Antonio. What kind of shark? Miss Helen is a horn shark. Okay. So I'm assuming not a huge shark. I imagine it's like a reef shark. Okay. So I'm assuming, um, not a huge shark. Like, I'd imagine it's like a reef shark. Yeah. Is that like a tiny? Must be a couple of foot long. Oh, yeah.

They only look little. Oh, it's cute. It's like spotty and horny. Cute and little. Well, CCTV footage from the Texas Aquarium shows two men and a woman lifting it out of the pool,

grabbing it, placing it in a blanket, and putting it into a child's buggy and wheeling it out of the aquarium, stealing a shark. How do you just reach into the aquarium? It was one

of those aquariums where it stands at about waist height. And you can pat them. And it's like a reef sort of situation. I don't think you're supposed to pat them, but you can look in and see them from the top, see the starfish and see the whole situation. And kids can get down the side and you can see them swimming around, but you can look in over top.

And I think they just... So they had a wet blanket and a bucket in the buggy. And yeah, they just plopped it in and then wheeled it out. Amazing, isn't it? And no one saw them do that. No, apparently somebody, I remember when I read it last night, somebody said, oh, heck, what's happening with your trundler? It's leaking.

They said, oh yeah, the baby spilt the cup. It's a cup of water, so we're just going to go out to the truck and change it and then skedaddle away. Local police at first said they thought it was a prank because it's currently Shark Week in America. I don't know if that's what spurned these people

on. But what were they going to do with it? Just put it in a tank at home? I guess so. I guess so. There's a crazy amount. They reckon those are the blue tans. Is that what Nemo was?

No. Nemo was a clownfish. Dory was a blue tan. They said numbers of those just disappeared on reefs because people were taking them home. But then I understand because that can fit in an aquarium. Yeah. No, I don't understand stealing it,

but the shark's going to get bigger. No, they don't understand stealing it, but the shark's going to get bigger. Well, no, no, good. They don't. Good news, though. Good news. Several tips from the public allowed police to identify the truck used to steal the animal.

Two people later confessed and, yeah, have been arrested. 18-inch long shark it was. It's been recovered, taken back to the aquarium, and it's alive and well. That's amazing, isn't it? And it's in good health.

Because I thought sharks constantly had to be moving forward to put water through their gills so they could breathe. Yeah, I don't know. Did you see that video over the weekend of those people dragging that shark back in the water? I think it had a hook in its mouth, and they got it out with, like, bolt cutters or some kind of wire. And then dragged it back in. And then dragged it in by the tail. But it was huge. And there was like three of them.

Did they land it fishing? No, I don't know if they just came across it. And then they dragged it in with the tail. And at any time could have swung around and taken a bite out of them. I wonder how nimble a shark is out of water though. Oh, it was flapping around. There's no way I would have been near it. Because it would get to the point where you were maybe up

to like your knees and the shark would start being in familiar territory. And that's when you'd want to be getting out. Yeah. Well, it's a happy ending. FEM. How do I get onto this? That's never a good sign. There's a new trend

for women's downstairs trimming. Okay. Maintenance. Right. So I was sceptical when I read this, but it's come from a gynaecologist. Okay. So this New York-based gynaecologist has seen a few downstairs regions of females.

Could you be married to a gynecologist? Nah, I couldn't. Could you be? Nah, because I feel like they're always judging it. And like it would become too like boring. And they see lots of vaginas. What do you think? He'd be out there and he'd see one better than yours.

Nah, because also like it turns into a job. Yeah, it's work. Yeah. You'd be like, you want to get all up in McGill? And he's like, oh, I've been at work all day. Do something you love and you'll never work another day in your life. But if you do something you love every day, you'll soon, you know, get a back up with it. Yeah.

It'll get turned into work. You'll get home, your wife will be like, how about it? Or, you know, you get home, your partner's like, how about it? Or, you know, you get home, your partner's like, how about it? And you're like, nah. Sure.

Saw a couple of real bad ones pre-lunch and I've just not ever needed since. Ruined the day for me. However, if he marries you, you know,

yours must be good. Yeah, it must be alright. Yeah, true. Or he likes you as a person, which is also important. So what trend are the gynecologists seeing?

That natural is the new Brazilian. So not just like the bush is back. The bush is back. Like natural bush is back. Not even like bush trimmed, just like sevenies. Here's an interesting thing about pubes. They get to a certain length and then they stop growing, eh? They don't keep growing like hair just keeps growing.

I was going to say, do they? But they must stop. They must stop because you don't get the big foot-long Guinness World Record. Yeah, it's not like beards and hair on your head. Are you looking Guinness World Record for... Because you kind of stop mid-sentence and have this newsflash look in your eyes. I was like, well, I don't think there's a world record for... Longest pubes.

Right. Well, I wouldn't be... Who has the world's longest pubic hair? Quora? Go to that website. Oh, Quora's got all the answers you'll ever need. No, nobody's answered that. It's been asked.

No one's answered. We're just looking, when did we start maintaining that in the first place? And did they... Yeah. Was that a thing in the 70s? Or was it just like, everyone's just like, I mean, I don't know about the 70s, but surely people still had a little trim.

In the 70s? And even the 80s. Surely there was a little bit of maintenance. Or was it just always out of control? Bikini line maintenance you're talking about. Yeah. Yeah. So you're screwed because you get laser hair removal.

Yeah. So you, even if you want to. I remember people used to joke about this saying, what if, yeah, what if it comes back in trend? I was like, oh, well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Well, we're crossing it now because it's been printed in Vogue magazine and they know fashions. I mean, clothing fashions usually.

Yeah. But, yeah, it turns out the bush is back. The pubis is back. Yeah. Heavens. I guess it depends on who you're with, though, eh? Yeah, I'd say so. Yeah.

If it's back, it's time to jump on board, like, hair care products specifically for that region. It was quite coarse, isn't it? There wasn't any beard specific care product. Yeah. And now it's everything. They're flooded. The balms.

Yep. The oils, the everything. So now maybe we need to look into. But you know how like on hair products, it's like for dry, like brittle hair, like to make it soft and smoothie and a smoothie? Smooth and voluminous. Yeah. What would be, what do you need for that?

Like what would be the description? You wouldn't want to pick up the pube shampoo and it's like for dry, scalpy, fruity, dandruffy pube. Head and shoulders. Head and shoulders. Head and shoulders. Pubes shoulders. Head and shoulders. Pubes and toes. Badge.

I don't know. Grim. I don't know. Good market to look into though. Head and shoulders. David Farrier, New Zealand journalist and the man behind

the new Netflix show Dark Tourist. He came in last so he can talk to us about Dark Tourist. And I'm almost finished. I'm on the last episode. I finished it at the weekend.

So good. Love that big ark. That was a very, that's where I'm up to in the last episode. Oh, yeah, in America. Someone built that giant ark replica. But what the ark would have looked like. Is it? How big is it?

It's huge. I remember seeing it on the news ages ago. Because it would have to be. it's going to have elephants. It's got dinosaurs and it's got all the cages and all the animals that would have had on there some dinosaurs. What? Very interesting to see someone with such a crazy idea of the history of the earth with a doctor in front of their name.

Yeah, it's such a fascinating series. If you haven't seen it, give it a crack at some. It's incredible. Now, one thing that David Farrier experienced before the show and now that it's kind of gone international and worldwide through Netflix as he's experiencing a lot more is the comparisons to fellow documentary maker and also fellow white guy with brown hair, sometimes five o'clock shadow glasses wearing Louis Theroux.

Who's famous for such documentaries. Yeah. Isn't he? He makes documentaries on wacky subjects. Yeah. In fact, someone during David Farrier's Netflix show had a go at him for being a cheap Louis Theroux, didn't they? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

He said that you're trying to be like your pal Louis. And then David Farrier says, I'm cheap Louie Thoreau. And he's like, no, I didn't say you're cheap Louie Thoreau. I mean, it didn't need to be said. But he's wearing it more on Twitter now. I still remember responding to a couple of tweets yesterday. And even Louie Thoreau getting in on it. The man.

Yeah, David Farrier apologizing on Twitter to Louis Theroux for always getting dragged into these conversations where David Farrier's getting called a shitty version of Louis Theroux and Louis Theroux said, I'm okay with these convos, they're quite funny. Less keen on the ones that say you're a younger version of me and less keen on the ones that don't mention me at all. And it's actually, I just searched it,

so many people think he is Louis Theroux until a certain point. See, I didn't know who Louis Theroux was, but now that I've Googled it, like, they could be brothers.

They could be twins. That's the thing, they do look alike. But then, Louis Theroux doesn't have the market cornered on documentaries. A lot of people

make documentaries. No, but even like the way Louis Theroux like kind of steers off into the distance is the same as David Farrier. They're very similar mannerisms. It's crazy. They could be brothers.

Are they like separated twins? I don't know. But as a bald person with a beard who's constantly sent photos of people going, Hey, is this you? Or, Hey, oh my God, this guy could be your twin. I see that there's definitely, you know, when you look at it a bit closer,

they are wildly different people. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, I have to adhere to that policy given that I get, hey, is this you? No, that person, where is this happening? Dunedin? No, not in Dunedin. Are you sure?

Pretty sure. Pretty sure, but go and tell that ball guy with the beard that he's handsome. Yeah, sure. Do him a favour. FM. You know when you watch movies and guys are like post-sexy time, like roll over and go to sleep or like –

Just in the movies. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah, no. Yep. Just in the movies. Just in the movies, yeah. It never happens in real life.

Well, what? Just trying to think what I did after last time I did it as well. I thought you were going to say last night. I was like, whoa, okay. What do I like, a little bit of a chat? Guys do have that reputation, don't they? For, oh, you just want to go to sleep. But that's because afterwards you get real tired, eh?

Yeah. You're just like, oh, you just want to go to sleep. But that's because afterwards you get real tired, eh? Yeah. You're just like, oh, I can go to sleep now. If the guy wants to go to sleep straight afterwards, maybe take it that he's doing more than his fair share of the work and he's exhausted, ladies, and you should, I don't know, exert a bit more energy. Okay. Shots fired.

There is a study that's been done, and apparently this is a world first, by Queensland University of Technology. How is that technology? Why are they studying this? No, because I always think like everyone that goes to the Queensland University of Technology

does like welding and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. And now they're doing like a sex service. Scaffolding. Plastering. It's not though.

I mean all great trades but that's what kind of what that brings up there. They have found that four in ten men 40% good have suffered PCD

post coital dysphoria so this means feeling of sadness, tearfulness or irritability after sex Oh irritability Why though? They're easily irritated. Well, I think it's just like,

obviously it's getting a lot of emotions out there, but it's just completely not what you expect from a guy. Because like, I don't know, some women would experience PCD. Yeah. Especially if you think that they're rolling over and they're like... Yeah, right.

But apparently four in 10 men have this as well. Feelings of sadness. What, it didn't live up to the expectation or it's such an emotional time that it's kind of the vent and it opens. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Straight after you're very sort of at peace

and maybe you've been bottling something up and it just comes forth and you're like, you know what, it's just been a hard week. Like, you've never experienced this one. I'm always stoked. Stoked to have been there. Stoked to have taken part. Really looking forward to next time.

Yep. Just genuinely very pleased. James, producer, have you ever felt this afterwards? Had PCD? Got emotional? I mean, maybe there might have been earlier years where there might have been a small sign of regret afterwards. Like a bit of guilt? I'm not too sure. Maybe some guilt.

I mean, it's such a rollercoaster of emotions. The excitement, the I don't know what you call it. Yeah, there's three three phases hard work bit of hard work bit of hard work and then the

feeling of accomplishment afterwards you probably would be on a bit of a downer your own personal Everest so now you're like now what I've climbed Everest

now what yeah K2 is next you do the top seven pieces Kilimanjaro yeah is another one.

That big blue hole in the Caribbean that they dive down into. You can go up, you can go down. Why not? They've said it's challenging masculine subculture in the West and they want to say that men are always considered desirable and they value sex as pleasurable, but it's not always the case. I've heard of guys like, I know somebody who engaged in relations with somebody

and afterwards at the foot of the bed, he sat there crying saying, what have I done? What have I done? What, didn't what? I mean, she said that was a real off-put. Well, he obviously had this. I've heard about some guys crying.

But, like, what are you supposed to do? I don't know. What would you do, Caitlin? I would be, if I, afterwards, someone who I had been with started crying, I'd be so, like, what did I do? What have I done? I don't want to make it all about me, but, like, literally, what have I done? What have I done?

Caitlin, you've never. Yeah, because I'm always the one that cries. So if they're crying, then we're the ones that cry. Afterwards, do you cry? Oh, sorry, no. Not after sex. I've never had sex, though, so I don't know. But, yeah, no, that would be a little bit odd.

I'd be like, are you okay? You'd be like, what have I done? You want a cup of tea? But then this research has got us talking about it. Yeah. And they've said, you know, it's about changing that masculine thing. So maybe while it doesn't happen to us, because four in ten, that's... It's a lot.

Yeah. Yeah. It's 40%. It's less than the majority, but still it does happen to some people. It's not all masculine and bravado. No. I'm going to try being upset about it after next time. So I think we've got scheduled one in for November,

so I'll let you guys know. You're only saying this because she's still asleep, aren't you? I was sleeping like an absolute baby. The Top Six with Vaughan Smith. That teachers are striking. Primary school teachers have voted to strike for a full day. They were going to go half a day, but then they're like, no, we want to send a strong message.

And I heard this morning they were offered 2.5% pay rises for the next three years, but they were like, no, we want 16% in two years. Play hard. Yeah, right. Play hard, no, we want 16% in two years. Play hard. Yeah, right. Play hard, and rightfully so. Yeah. You know?

Good people, primary school teachers. Work hard. Crucial to the education of the next generation. So the top six things school kids can do when those teachers are striking because a whole lot of parents are going to have to worry about what to do with these kids.

Oh, yeah. Just leave them at home. Well, here are six options. Six, dress them up and take them to work as the new intern. Oh yeah. Just leave them at home. Well, here are six options. Six, dress them up and take them to work as the new intern. Good idea. But wherever you work, if you work in a professional office, chuck a cute little suit on them. Let's see anybody deny an eight-year-old access to the photocopier.

Yeah, true. Because I need to do some work. I have been sent over to photocopy these things. Number five on the list of the top six things school kids can do when their teachers are striking on August 15th, send them to the grandparents. Yeah.

You know, grandparents love having their grandkids. And if the grandparents have passed away, still send them to the grandparents. How much trouble can a seven-year-old get up to in a graveyard for the day? I don't know. Let's find out in two Wednesdays time. And it'll be quite like, if it's quite scary for them, it'll be good next time you can say,

well, the teachers actually striked because you were misbehaving at school. They'll be pretty good from then on, I think. Number four on the list of the top six things school kids can do while the teachers are striking. Dress them up as a dog and drop them off at doggy daycare. Is that cheaper? Because kids love playing with dogs.

Because how much is doggy daycare? Like 60 bucks a day. It's just the thought of not being able to get your kids in. Yeah, right. On Wednesday during the day, daycare when they're over five. Yeah, right. So dressing them up as a dog and just, because kids love dogs. Yeah.

Again, but if your kids are terrified of dogs, you're there because you misbehaved at school and the teachers wanted a day off from your misbehaviour. They won't do it again. Number three on the list of the top six things kids can do while teachers are striking in two Wednesdays time. Put them in a treehouse with snacks and water enough for the day and when they climb up there, pull the ladder away.

Then set a moderate fire on the ground below the tree. Careful that the fire doesn't touch the tree, because I don't know if you guys know this, but trees are made of wood. Yeah. And wood burns. And then they won't be able to get down, and it'll be the most exciting game of The Floor is Lava

that they've ever played. Even though you start the fire as moderate, I don't know you can tell a fire to stay moderate. Oh, dig a moat. Okay. Put it in a drum. Yeah. Yeah. Put the fire in, again, a series of drums. Okay. Put it in a drum. Yeah. Yeah.

Put the fire in a series of drums. Yeah. There we go. And hope they remain upright. Brilliant. And they're not plastic drums. Yeah, no. Steel drums.

Number two on the list of the things school kids can do while teachers are striking, drop them off at the pool or mall or library or Rambo's Inn for the day. We joke about this, but this happens.

Yeah, because the mall has like a little playground area. Is there rules for how long they're supposed to be there? Well, probably rules that they're not supposed to be like over five and still in that little playground area for a start. But, you know, these places are known for their love of unsupervised and unruly kids loitering all day. Yeah.

Aren't they? And the number one thing to do with school kids when their primary school teachers are striking on August 15th is send them to school anyway. They're always saying their favourite part of school is lunchtime and playtime. And without access to the classrooms, teachers or learning, they're pretty much having a whole day of lunchtime and playtime.

Good idea. That's my idea. And that's today's Top 6. FVM, the podcast. FVM. I just would like to share. Okay. For a minute.

I, at the weekend, on Friday, I purchased a new going out outfit. Is this what you wore to my party? Yes. Did you buy something especially for Megan's party? No. Well, yes, but no. I wore it the night before as well. And I got a little dot of food on it, but I like wiped it with it. Oh, I didn't notice. Yeah, no. I wore it the night before as well. And I got a little dot of food on it, but I wiped it with it.

Oh, I didn't know this. Yeah, no, I wiped it. Did you run this outfit past anyone? Because normally you'll send us a group message. No. Okay. I didn't run this past anybody. Risky.

So what I basically bought was a hooded sweatshirt. Yep. And then, what do you call those jackets? Just an AS colour one. I only ever shop at AS colour. And only when they've got that deal we can get all that stuff. Were they like, oh my god,

not a raglan tee for you today? Oh no, I got one of those as well. You got the deal. I got the five for whatever. Great basics. You can't beat them for the basics. And I'm very basic. I'm proudly embracing my basic bitchness. Okay. 100%.

I'm not even ashamed of it. So I went in and I got a grey hoodie and what do you call the jackets? They look like a bomber jacket. A bomber jacket. So it was called a bomber jacket over top. Because I had that bomber jacket a little while ago and everyone was like, I really like your bomber jacket. What's that say on it?

And it was a free one from the movie Independence Day 2. And it had an Independence Day badge on it. Sometimes you're embarrassing. And then I got to the point where I was like, I'll try to pick it off. And I tried to pick it off and it just had all these holes in it. So I was like, oh, I can't wear that. This is how Vaughn branches out though. He gets given free clothes, gets a couple of compliments.

And then he's like, I'm going to branch out. It's a trial period. Yeah, right. It's a trial period. Yeah, right. It's a trial period. Okay. So anyway, I go in. I just leave the wife and the children in the car. I said, I'm not going to be long.

And I wasn't because I knew exactly what I want. And that's how I shop. So I ran in and I got it and I came back out. And then I started getting dressed behind the car. Shardae's like, what are you doing? I was like, well, we're going to this thing. I've got to put on these clothes. And she's like, why are you getting changed literally on the side of the road?

I was like, that's all right. Who cares? So I put it on and I get in the car and she looks at me and she's like, where'd you get that idea from? The hoodie with the bomber jacket on the top. And I said, why? And she's like, where'd you get the idea from? You can tell me the truth.

And I said, I got the idea from August. And she's like, I knew I got the idea from August and she's like I knew you got the idea from August because we went to the zoo and like a weekend and August had her hoodie on

and then she put her jacket on over top she picked her jacket and then she had her hood up and she put it down and I was like

man you look cool like that is a good look for you I was like this is very sort of like layered winter. You look like you could be from Boston in a movie with Mark Wahlberg in it. I was like, that looks cool.

And she's like, oh, thanks. She's so much cooler than you. You look really, really cool. Like that suits you. She had some boots on and some jeans. I was like, cool look. And I couldn't shake it. And I was like, she's my daughter, so surely I can pull that off.

Yeah, right. And did you? Did he, Megan? I actually did notice the new outfit. And I was like, this is good. I got a couple of compliments on it the night before as well. Were the colours the same as Augie? No, she had different colours.

Oh, okay. Yeah. No, she had a blue jacket or something. Right, okay. She looked great. Because he branched out. He went grey hoodie and green bomber. Yeah.

Is that branching out? Yeah, I thought you would just go black or something. Good on you. Oh, no. I thought I saw the grey in, because then I did some research. Yep. And I saw that that was quite a popular combo. Oh, right.

So I was like, well, I don't want to go too far out there. Do you know what, though? I don't want to laugh too much because I'm proud of you. And I kept looking at August when we were walking around the zoo and I said to her, do you reckon I could wear something like that?

Do you reckon I'd look alright? And she said, yeah, I think you'd look cool. So I was like, alright, I've got your backing. I'm into it. This is Megan getting fashion advice

from a four year old who literally just grabbed a jacket and chucked it on. You know what though? You are getting very close to having a family uniform. Oh, we've done it before. We've left, though? You are getting very close to having a family uniform. Oh, we've done it before.

We've left the house. We've been driving down the road. Shana's like, turn around. I'm like, why? What's happened? Have you forgotten your phone? I've just realised we're all wearing the same thing. And we've walked out of the house black T-shirt or black shirts,

blue jeans, and like chucks on. And the whole family's in the family outfit, the family uniform. She's like, turn around. I'm like, oh, we don't have time. Turn around. One of us at least has got to change. See, I'm okay with it. Like seriously, if I ever have a kid, I think we'll all match just because I'm like, this

is cool. Oh no, you're going to be, you're going to have a daughter and she's going to arrive home and you're like, that's a good outfit. Like mum's getting one too. And the daughter's going to be like, oh mum, no! And we are going to wear it at the same time. And then you're getting ready to go somewhere, she's already in the car, you walk out, you're like, oh great, we

match. People are going to think we're sisters. They don't know. Don't pull your face like that. Yeah, by then you've had work. Oh, this is great news, Lorenz. People are going to think of a sister. Lorenz!

Mum and Lorenz, couple of hot babes, ready to go and push the boys with their messing outfits. It's funny because this will totally happen. Don't say Lorenz. I would never call my kid Lorenz. It's a hot name. That's a great name. Could go either way, male, female.

You wanted Lauren, but you wanted a bit of Lawrence, so you went Lawrence. The rest of it will happen, not the name. Yeah. Where are you going, Lawrence? We only just got to the party. Why are you running away asking people if they've got a spare change of clothes? Come back and stand by mum so people can think we're sisters.

It's going to happen. It's going to happen. I'm not even denying it. No, there's no use denying it. I wonder though, can we take some calls? Did anyone have like a family out? Did anybody go out as a family and everybody was matching or in a family uniform? In a 90s family photo shoot where you went somewhere and they had that grey background.

What did they call that background? I don't know. I don't know. And it looked a bit like a grey marble. Marble, yeah. Sometimes it was blue too. Did you have the blue one? Yeah, well, we were never that flash.

We went for the budget grey. But often those families were all in like a matching cardi or like a woolen sweatshirt. I think there's a photo of our family. We're all in a different coloured woolen sweatshirt looking so miserable. Well, I don't know. Maybe mum dressed you and your siblings the same

when you went out as a family. Because you see twins dressed the same or maybe brothers the same but different colours. Yeah. But, like, only ever two. You never see the whole fam. Yeah, I don't know if the whole fam would go matching. What about tracksuits, like, when you go on holiday or something?

That's just an American thing, though, isn't it? I don't think Kiwis would do that, would they? Not so much. Well, I don't know. If you ever went out as a family and you all matched F.A.M. Are we talking if you've ever all gone out dressed as the same as a family?

Maybe it wasn't the same exact, but like the same hoodie under a jacket, which now I have snaps with my four-year-old. They'll probably be like, actually, I think we'd look pretty cool going out together. I want to see if I'd them buy hoodies and jackets. So some text messages in when you've gone out dressed the same as the family.

Somebody messaged in saying, my family is all into Speedway. So we've got a lot of the same shirts. I don't know. I don't know. Like, do you think like their favorite Speedway person? Car or yeah. Or like sponsors. Do you think it's more like sponsors t-shirts and stuff? Because you know

they always have lots of. Yeah. So we've got a lot of the same shirts. We've come up with a rule whoever put it on first gets to wear it. Otherwise we all go out and look like we're matchy matchy. I don't know like you could be the cast troll family or something. Yeah, yeah. So we've always got to watch for that one.

Someone said we once found a box on the side of the road and it was full of hoodies for a local sports club. We returned it to them and they said, oh, I don't know what's happened there. You can have those. So in our family, all of these hoodies are the same. So we often all put on a hoodie to go out and we're all wearing it. Never played sport for the club, but it looks like we're these mad family-wide supporters of the same

sports club. Ruth, your family? Dressed the same? Yeah, so my mum was absolutely delightful to us. She made us wear these fluorescent pink baseball caps, which she kind of glued these felt letters with our names on them. That's so cute. We'd be wearing like yellow pants and red shirts

and there was four of us. So I think that she thought if we were ever out, we wouldn't get lost. I know that to me, a fluoro hat says, she'll be able to find you in a crowd. Yeah. Was it those fluffets? I totally think that's what she was going with.

Sorry, what was that? Remember those fluffets? You could like literally write on it and then you fluff it up with a hairdryer. Yes. Yeah. That was the kind of stuff my mum did. But I think the very best thing she ever did was, when we got, you know where you go and you get your family photographs

taken at school or whatever, she made us wear Star Trek uniforms. Oh, mum. Oh, mum. Mum's got a great sense of humour. That is a wonderful idea. Oh, Mum. Oh, Mum. Mum's got a great sense of humour. That is a wonderful idea. Oh, my Lord. And four persons, that's the ultimate Star Trek

planetary explorers party. It is. Ruth, thanks for your call. Some other text messages in. I'm a triplet and my mum used to match us all in matching outfits with my brother in the boy version of our girl outfits. And my older sister was often in on the action too

against her will most of the time. Somebody else messaged in saying, mum orchestrated an entire double denim outing for the family once. Where were they going? Oh no. Everybody was in double denim. I don't know, but that was a real,

that was another 1990s family photo classic. Wasn't it getting on your best denims? It was, yeah. And everyone going in the same denims. Someone said, my mum made all of her own clothes

for formal events in the 1990s. Christings, weddings, birthdays. And often they were made out of grandmother's curtain-like leftover fabric. So there was a dress

for her made out of the fabric. She'd make a baby version for me and a tie and a pocket square for dad. And they all wore it together. To formal occasions. Wow. They all. Oh, wow.

I guess the carpet matches the curtains of everybody's. Literally wearing clothes made out of curtains. Oh, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. 145 days, 16 hours, 34 minutes and 18 seconds until Christmas. Oh my God. It's the 1st of August today. That's insane, eh? Yeah, what is it?

The 8th month. Yep. Goodness me. Goodness. Goodness me. Goodness me. Great, great. Goodness me. Goodness. Goodness me. Goodness me. Great, great. Goodness me.

But yes, 145 days away from Christmas and Christmas penetration is sneaking on up, sneaking on up, sneaking on up. Because we've had reports, international reports even. Paula is a listener who's currently in Sri Lanka. Ooh la la. I know. And she said it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Here's a picture of one of the many Christmas T-shirts on sale in Sri Lanka.

Mild grey T-shirt that says ho, ho, ho on the front. Okay. Getting in early. Large. Maybe it's a leftover. Just trying to get rid of it. I actually messaged back saying, are we sure ho, ho, ho doesn't mean something different in Sri Lanka?

Like it might mean party, party, party. Or it might be like a, you know, it could mean anything. Repeated three times. Yeah. From James, we've had a report from the shop that's actually in court taking on the big boys of Sanitarium. A little bit of Britain is that shop currently involved in

the Weetabix versus Weetabix scandal. And in there at the moment they've got dairy milk Christmas buttons. What's Christmas about them? It's got Santa on the front and a monkey wearing an elf suit with big chocolate buttons as eyes. But yeah, definitely a Christmas themed treat on the shelves there.

Yep. Okay. In a little bit of Britain. Somebody messaged in, just as we said we were about to do, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Okay. In a little bit of Britain. Somebody messaged in, just as we said we were about to do, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Yeah. Silverdale Pack and Safe have been playing Christmas carols. No, no.

Oh, they're taking the mess. Are you kidding? Yeah, they went in and they've been playing Christmas carols. See, I just think it's too late for a midwinter Christmas. Yeah, it is. You're supposed to do that in June-ish, right? Yeah. Because June's that time's past.

The end of the year from Christmas. But yeah, I think that time's past for a midwinter Christmas. We are so close to the big chains setting up their Christmas displays. Like those reports normally come in around September, don't they? Yeah, September's when you start getting... when we really see a spike in Christmas penetration. Well, that's a month away. October is another one. Then November. She's done by November. We're spike in Christmas penetration. Well, that's a month away. October is another one.

Then November. She's done by November. We're fully in Christmas mode. But speaking of getting into Christmas mode, 6,500 people have already said that they will be attending Christchurch Coca-Cola Christmas in the Park on the official Facebook page. Saturday the 24th of November this year at North Hagley Park. Six and a half thousand people have said they'll be attending.

They always sneak up on you because they're still done a month out of Christmas. Yeah, because they've got to get it all edited and on the telly before Christmas, right? But it's not just that. In Cambridge, the small Waikato town of Cambridge. Lovely. Yeah. This time of year. That's what people from Cambridge say at any time of the year.

Have already sent out an invitation for the Tamahiri Lions Best Artisan Markets Christmas Edition on Saturday the 1st of December. Oh, okay. So they're getting in there early to let you know that there's going to be a Christmas market. There is more reports than I thought we would get. That's not even all of the reports. Well, if you see anything Christmassy, if you see Christmas penetrating our lives, society, make sure you

send it in, get a snap of it, or report it in to our Facebook page, FVMZM on Facebook. So with all that in mind... Right now, Christmas penetration is at... 4%. Ooh, it is beginning to look a lot like Christmas. FVM, the podcast.

I've got news for you if you love a shooey. James, the producer, loves a shooey. A Christchurch tradition. Many of shooeys, yeah. For those that don't know what a shooey is, James, would you explain? People always have different sort of ideas of them, and it was always whether we, if we spilt a drink,

like, you know, your mate knocks into you and your drink spills on the ground, everyone would go quiet, and you'd just hear a guy in the back start going, shoo, shoo, shoo, before the whole thing starts going until you take your shoo off and fill your shoo up with the rest of your drink or another drink,

and then proceed to drink the rest of your drink out of the shoe. So you drink out of your own shoe? Well, yeah, it can be anyone's shoe. Or a nominated shoe. Normally, because we'd spill a drink, you'd drink it out of your own and then technically your night is sort of low-key ruined because you've got this wet shoe. Because you've got a wet shoe with booze and you've had to drink out of your own shoe. Exactly, yeah.

What is wrong with guys? I love that. Oh, shit, mate, you've made a mistake. It's time to ruin your night. Guys are, you know, guys, they do, you know, all these stupid things. It's a huge Australian thing as well. I've never done a shoeie because I've, I've, just

I don't want to. Like, yuck. That is disgusting. I've drank out of a boot before. Like a gum boot. But it was a new gum boot. Right, okay okay it was a previously unused gun okay so that you've done a gummy booties i think we call them booties gummies that was the booties i think but the shoeys are a bit of a tradition i got off i got offered a shoey a couple of months back from the boys at radio holt they were like drink from this shoe boys

they're grown men what are they doing shovingies for? They're behaving like bloody boys. Grow up. I said, whose shoe is this? They're like, it's Lee Hart's shoe. Lee Hart, who's wearing a sock and a bar. I'm like... Boy, you're bringing down our cool cred. You should have done it. You're a nice guy, but I just imagine you've got stinky ass feet.

You don't want to do a shoeie. No, I don't want to do a shoeie at all. You can make him do a shoeie. But you don't know. No, I don't want to do a shoeie at all. You can make him do a shoeie. Choose. Let's not. We don't know if Lee Hart has tinea or athlete's foot. It's always safe doing it. You should have just pulled your own one off and gone,

I'll do it out of my own lace up. Why are you being so precious? Okay, there has been research done. Listen to this. Why I am being so precious is that the Western Sydney University School of Medicine Gastroenterology Laboratory. Gastro is your stomach. Yeah, stomach-related stuff.

I'm imagining there were some students who turned up sick one day and they were like, let's investigate. Have found that using your shoe or somebody else's shoe or just a used shoe as a vessel could lead to illnesses such as pneumonia, diarrhea, and food poisoning via Staphylococcus aureus. Staph infection. Staph infection. They're not pretty either.

And septicemia. It can lead to septicemia. Nausea. Nausea. Nausea. Nausea. Just being nausea. I drew from a shoe It's going to get you being noisier

Now Did they test like how long the alcohol had to be in the shoe? Well they actually tested what kind of alcohol was best to use Yeah because what if it was straight vodka? Yeah It would kill the germies Bingo Straight vodka was the one they went for

And they said that was the safest one to do because it exterminated most of the bacteria. Not champagne and sparkling wine. It did not only not eradicate the bacteria, it encouraged the growth of more bacteria and the sort of bacteria that will happily survive into your body. Well, you think about beer, and that's yeasty, isn't it? Yeah.

That surely would help bacteria. And champagne, the sugars and everything in it. And vodka's got the least calories, least calories, least germs out of a shooie. But then you're not doing straight vodka out of a shooie. Why not? I think most of the stuff we were drinking out of the shooies was probably an 8% diesel or maybe even a Peruvian out of a can or something. It made you the man you are.

Even the bad Coca-Cola in that's bad enough, so mixing that with a shoe. Do you imagine aliens finally coming to Earth and they see people taking their shoes off and doing shoes? There's so many things aliens would just shake their head and be like, nah, actually. That's my main reason I don't think we've seen aliens, is they sit behind the moon being like,

these guys are morons. Like, even the normal ones are morons. Well, there you go. Research has shown shooies are bad for your health. Not good for you. So take that advice going into the weekend. But if you're looking for a silver lining, 2018, year of the silver lining, vodka is your best way to do it.

Joining us on the phone right now, the winner of Love Island Australia, Taylor. Good morning. How are you? Good, thank you. All right. So we're just going to like take it back to Grant times. When you left the show, I know you're probably sick of talking about him.

From your point of view, when you left Love Island, what happened between you two? Basically, I left him up. I don't doubt that Grant was as well. I think he did fall in love and he was in the villa too, but there was obviously the challenge where it came out that there was a potential secret girlfriend on the outside and something just didn't sit easy in my stomach

when that was brought up in the challenge. But like I said on the show, I was going to believe him until I was proven otherwise. And then obviously once I was given my internet and phone access back, I was able to get into a whole lot of articles that had come out and kind of understand the story a bit more. And then I obviously took that information and confronted Grant about it and kind of just said that if we were going to work on the outside,

I need to know that information. And he owned up to everything and basically said that he had had a girlfriend, he had lied, he did go on there for exposure. And, yeah, I just kind of was like, okay, well, what do we do now? And he said that he wanted to leave the girlfriend and that he was going to be with me. So it wasn't a case of, like, he had a girlfriend but they broke up just before he went on.

The girl on the outside believed that they were still together yeah apparently that they were gonna he was gonna go on the show get the exposure and then end up with her oh my god i know crazy times you can't get back with him right like what do you even say to that well i actually was like okay well let's see if well because i did believe that we did fall in love in there I actually was like, okay, well, let's see. Because I did believe that we did fall in love in there. And I was like, okay, well, maybe that he did go in there and not expect to fall in love. And then he did. So I was like, let's try and work through this. But the lies just continued and the story was changing. And every day there was a new argument over it because there was just more coming out of the story. And I just was like, okay, for my own mental state and for me to want to be in a healthy relationship,

this is not a healthy relationship. So you haven't even seen him or spoken to him personally? I haven't seen him. We've spoken after one of the radio interviews we did. He ended up getting in contact with me finally. Yeah. And then we spoke for a little bit then, but yeah, nothing like face to face. Side note, when you guys are in the, like you're getting ready in the makeup room, why,

like you're always blow-drying your eyelashes. What is, is it, what is that? Okay, do you know what? Can I just say, they only do it with me doing that, and that was Erin who taught all of us to do it, and we've gathered us if we didn't look after our lashes. I don't know why they stitched me up with that. Because it was all Erin.

Apparently, it makes your lashes look more puffed up and, like, makes them last longer. Apparently, it makes your lashes look more puffed up. And, like, makes them last longer. Oh, so are you talking real lashes or, like, extensions? No, eyelash extensions. So we all had eyelash extensions. Really? And we kind of went, like, Erin is, like, I know about her eyelash extensions.

Like, I'm talking next level, like, brushes and seven times a day. And she fully was, like, no, you have to, every time they get wet, you have to like puff them up, you have to dry them. And I'm like, my God, this is more commitment than I was prepared for. So even if you just like catch a bit of wind in the face and it makes your eyes water, you should pop out and puff them up and dry them. No, because that was water from the bottom. The eyelash extensions are on top.

But if you went from the bottom. The eyelash extensions are on top. But if you went in the pool... Look, I was in a more committed relationship with my lashes than a lot of people were in that house. Roger that. So what's happening now? Like, what's life like now? Yes, I've moved to Sydney. I've done the big move and basically just kind of adapting back to society.

We didn't even have music in there. So there's so much music I need to catch up on, so many shows. But just spending time with friends and family is really nice. And I got out and I went back to Perth a little bit. But yeah, now I'm moved in Sydney and just kind of going from there. You know, speaking of catching up on shows, there's this show

all the girls around here are watching, Love Island. Oh, really? Like, if you've been away that long just doing the quick maths in my head, you've probably got

a whole season to watch. Yeah, I'm up for like episode 20, I think, at the moment. Right. I was going to say, is it cringe watching yourself? Yeah.

Is it cringe watching me? I'm like, oh my God. Are you watching the UK version? No, that's next on the list. And do you know what's so annoying? Every time I go on social media, it's telling me about the UK one and I'm like, you're ruining it for me. Hello, that happened with the Australian one too.

We're like, no! Oh, yeah, of course. Just lastly, we've all got Love Island drink bottles around here. Did you get to take yours home? Yeah, I stole mine. I took my suitcase and then there was like a spare one lying around. I was like, yeah, I'll take that too. There was a spare one?

You only got like one or two each? We only got, yeah, one or two each. And then if you like broke them or ran out of them, so Grant, like, ends up going through three. And then by the time he needed a fourth one, they were like, no. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm on a hugely successful international show that's making this network multitudes of millions,

but you won't spring for a fourth trampoline. I'm trying to teach him a lesson. They were like, you can buy one when you get out. Oh, my God. Did you put anything else in the suitcase? you can buy one when you get out. Oh, my God. Did you put anything else in the suitcase? Did you steal anything else from the villa? Oh, my God. Okay, so my obsession is peanut butter.

I stole peanut butter from the house. No, they had that on the outside. I was going back into lockdown, and I was like, I'm not going into lockdown without peanut butter. Get it. Peanut butter. Oh, well, all the best, Taylor. I was so into it.

Thank you so much for talking to us. And yeah, stay away from Grant. Thank you so much. Nice to talk to you. Okay. F.E.M. A police officer, or I actually should say Taranaki Area Commander Inspector. I'm not going to say his name because I feel sorry for him.

Right. He went on Tinder. Now, he was looking for love, just like lots of people. Are you sure he didn't confirm the officer's... He's talking about a younger officer. Because he's too old to be on Tinder. No, you're not that guy. Yeah.

Excuse me. Hey. There's no age limit to Tinder. Well, no, he just looks like one of those old mates who wouldn't even have a smartphone. Old mates need love too. Yeah, true. Well, I'm not saying they shouldn't, but I'm just saying he looks like one of those old mates who you'd have to download it for him. Yeah,

right. And then probably run him through it. So that guy confirmed that there is a Taranaki police officer that was dobbed in about the fact that he was on Tinder. So someone saw him on Tinder in his police uniform and

they dobbed him in and said, look, I don't think that this is appropriate. And I didn't think that that would be a problem. But then some people obviously, you know, they get arrested or they get on the wrong side of the law and then that's it. They've got a thing. Yeah. Anything they'll complain about. Yeah.

Well, they reported him for unprofessionalism and they are going to tell him to take it down because even though it seems like something little, they have social media policies that say they can't include images in uniform in social media. That's really crazy to think that when social media came out, it wasn't, you know, people were like,

oh, okay, this is cool, this is new. And then it infiltrated society to the point where like everybody needed a policy. Even like the police needed a social media policy. And, you know, people are like, oh, okay, this is cool. This is new. And then it infiltrated society to the point where, like, everybody needed a policy. Even, like, the police needed a social media policy. A lot of workplace, and you probably wouldn't even remember it in a contract, but I reckon a lot of workplaces would have this. Have a clause.

Yeah, especially if you work for a big company. What if I, like, you work really hard and then you've got a real cool uniform, you're, like, choice in your police outfit. Like, I'd want to, like, put work really hard and then you've got a real cool uniform, you're like choice in your police outfit. Like I'd want to like put it on. Are firefighters allowed? Oh. That's a pretty sexy outfit. That's like chucking a lure off the side of the boat.

It's a really one of them fancy soft jigs. They do calendars. Yeah, they do calendars. And that's even sexier. So the police wouldn't do a sexy calendar? You don't think? But the police are different because they have a different because it's a different job, isn't it? They're upholding the law.

They're upholding the law. There's very high standards expected of police. And not saying that there's not high standards expected of firefighters, but their job is to put out the fire, isn't it? They're a bit rogue, you know? They do the sexy calendars, you know. To put out the fire or light the fire. Maybe they do have a policy, I don't know.

But you see a lot of people on of people, like, on dating apps, they'll put up photos. They might work for an airline or whatever. And you'd be like, oh, I wonder if you're allowed to do that. Oh, pilots. I think pilot would be the one you work the hardest. It takes a long time to become a pilot. You want to use the sexy.

The uniforms aren't necessarily that sexy, but the power that it wields would be attractive, surely. Is that something, if you see that on a dating app, producer Caitlin, someone in like a pilot's uniform or a firefight, would that get you? Yeah, 100%. That'd hook you in? Yeah. Anything or anyone, not thing, any man in a uniform does it for me.

See, I think men would be, you know, like worst offenders of this because they know ladies like a man in a uniform. Why not utilise it? I've come across... Oh, yeah, a woman would never put a photo up on any sort of dating app in clothes that would, you know, sway a man. That we were... No, oh, yeah.

I mean yoga pants. I mean, I wouldn't imagine a woman who looked good in yoga pants would ever use those. No. No, meaning a uniform, though. There would be very few women who would be like, okay, well, this uniform is better than something else I could wear. Do you know what I mean?

You mean through New Zealand customs? Both males and females. I've imagined for bisexuals arriving into New Zealand, that's a very erotic time. It is, yeah. Get them better pants, please. Yeah. Yeah. Get them better whole uniform. Yeah, right. It is, yeah. Get them better pants, please. Yeah. Yeah.

Get them better whole uniform. Yeah, right. They're good people. What is a photo that gets you every time though, Caitlin? I love if they put up like, if you've got a picture with a dog and then they're like, this is my dog. And then because it's so cute, but it also gives me a good like starting point. I'm like, hey, I liked you because I want to meet your dog, Boris.

I don't know. That hasn't really worked for me that much. The name Boris. I mean, I know this is purely hypothetical, but I've gone off him because he called his dog Boris. When you met Gary from Crime Squad, the undercover policeman that you met. Famously, yes.

Famously years ago on Tinder. Did he have a photo of him in uniform? No, he didn't. He was undercover. He was undercover. That's right, I forgot. He was in a crime squad. Normal clothes. You're right though, with an animal, like preferably a dog.

They care and they're kind of responsible. Yeah, and I've come across people that like borrow their friend's dogs for photos and they're like, oh this is my friend's dog, I just used it for the photo. What I saw a meme the other day, it's like, oh I oh this is my friend's dog i just used it for the phone what i saw i mean the other day it's like oh i just borrowing my friend's tattoos and then they got their arm in front of them have you seen that i love tattoos i like a tattoo and not even their arm but i'm not could we like a tattoo oh i love it i love a sleeve on a guy do you yeah i like that i didn't really know that i want to get it tattoos myself

but i love sleeves okay can we take some calls then? Because maybe we could actually compile a list out of this. What photos hook you in every time on a dating app? If a guy has

a particular photo that works, what is it? We want to know. And maybe, so maybe it's a guy with a dog, it's a guy with

a sleeve tattoo, a guy... So we're helping out guys effectively by telling them the sorts of photos they should be putting in these things. Or with your mum. It's a guy with a sleeve tattoo. So we're helping out guys effectively by telling them the sorts of photos they should be putting in these things. Put one with your mum.

Put one with your mum. Or let's hear from guys as well. Like what works for you when you see a girl's profile? You know, what photo hooks you in every time? 0800 dials at M.

You can text 9696. A picture with my cute dog? Yeah. You can borrow that. No, that wouldn't work. Thanks. Let's hope you96. A picture with my cute dog? Yeah. You can borrow Leo, Caitlin. Thanks. Let's hope you don't get single and use that dog in a photo. Hey.

No, because it looks like... Fletch. It makes them... Oh, my God. They chose the ugliest dog in the bit because... Leo James is not ugly. They care. They care. He did hump me at the weekend.

That was very aggressive. Terrible tasting. Give us a text. Give us a text. Give us a text. A call now. What photo hooks you in every time on a dating app? A police officer in New Plymouth in Taranaki has been reprimanded after somebody complained after they saw a photo of the officer in uniform on Tinder, which breaches the rules.

Yeah, you're not allowed to use your uniform in social media. I wouldn't have even thought anything of it. If you work for a big company and there's a uniform and a reputation, you might want to check your social media policy because you don't want to lose your job over a Tinder photo. Yeah. But it might work for you. The uniform totally would work.

Yeah. We want to know what's a surefire success photo. When you're trawling through Tinder, what kind of photo gets you every time? Yeah. What is the guy or the girl doing in every photo? Somebody messaged in. Do you remember just on that? Do you remember when Caitlin had a photo of her with Justin Bieber and those poor kids in Africa?

You were really trying to look. Hey, now. Okay. First of all. That was a double whammy of feels. Oh my god, Justin Bieber. Oh, look at her in a village. Yeah, variability. No, wait, is that a word? Variability?

Variety. Variety. Yeah, that's the word you were looking for. Variability. Sure. You know, variability is the spice of life. I was just looking for some variability. I deal with kids

and also Justin Bieber. Can we write down variability? I've got the feeling it's going to be one of those words that we forget, but that should never be forgotten. Variability is the spice of life. Okay.

So what hooks you in on online dating? Now, I'm not, there's so many text messages and due to them just being texts, I can't tell which ones are sarcastic. If everyone could start using the tilde in front of sarcastic sentences,

that's the little squiggly line. Oh, yeah, okay, yeah. Is that what you're supposed to do? That's my, my friends and I, we have a rule. If you're going to be sarcastic, you've got to chuck a tilde in because it's hard to judge sarcasm.

Because somebody said, a picture of a lowered Subaru on some green grass with a landscape outlook in the background where he's not even in the picture. That really gets me going. No, that's sarcasm. That's definitely sarcasm. Because a lot of guys use a picture of a photo of a car.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. We don't love your car like you love your car. But then also, if you love cars, you often want a partner who also loves cars. You can find that out later, can't you? But have you ever got a bill for fixing a car? You should definitely hook up with someone who can fix your car. Have you ever got a bill?

Have you guys ever had to fix a car? It's real expensive. Somebody said, hiking photos on dating apps always get me. Shows that they're interested in fitness, love nature, and good at climbing up things.

Am I right, ladies? Ayo! That's their message. I see that and I'm like, no, they're going to make me go for walks. Is that what you think too, Caitlin? No.

If you see a hiking photo? I'm like, oh, but what about necklaces? How about we go for a walk on Sunday? What about get out and explore the national parks? Stay in a hut? With a long drop toilet. I've seen pictures.

I've seen pictures. In a hut? They look great in pictures. Okay, Alicia, what picture gets you every time? They'll slay the tattoos. Yeah, so like producer Caitlin, what is it? Does it say bad boy? I think it, yeah, it just reads bad boy.

It's like, ooh, look at you, you know? But does every girl want a bad boy? Yeah. I was going through those phases, you know. I was definitely going

through a phase back then and I was just like, ooh, let me at him. You're attracted to them but then you want to turn them? Like, you want to be the girl that broke

the bad boy? Yeah, but, oh, seriously, goodness me. Yeah. Wow, okay, well, I think we've found your weakness. Alicia, thanks for your call. And for a guy's perspective, Alex, what are you like on social media?

What pictures? It's a bit cheesy, but I've got to say a decent smile goes a long way. Oh, because we're all like pouting and duck-facing and stuff? Yeah, yeah. So if they're smiling it kind of shows that they're happy and secure and they don't

they're kind of I guess happy in themselves. What about like caught in the moment, like laughing but not looking at the camera? Yeah, I guess that's kind of cool because it's like, it's one of those special photos where it's not really planned.

Okay. That you think. You can kind of analyse and see if they're putting it on or if it's just natural and it happens. Right. How would you feel if you saw a girl next to Justin Bieber or some poor kids in Africa? Unfazed, really.

What does that mean? Unfazed. She had a lovely smile on both ofazed, really. Oh, did you hear that? What does that mean? Unfazed. She had a lovely smile on both of them, though. Oh, maybe. Yeah, she got you. Now, you used to be a firefighter. Correct. What is the deal?

Are firemen allowed to put on photos on Tinder? Could that be your Tinder profile? Um, so you could, but you've got to get, like, approval from your officer. Right, so you're like, hey, Sarge, what do you reckon on this one? Do you could, but you've got to get approval from your officer. Alright, so you're like, hey Sarge, what do you reckon on this one? Do you think it's hot? Got any pointers? No, you've got to ask your station officer to make sure that it doesn't violate

the fire service kind of Oh, like with the hose between your legs. You couldn't be humping the hose. Yeah, no, you're not allowed to hump hoses. Do you get to take the uniform home? No, that stays at the station. The number one you have at home, and I still have it.

The number one, is that so? Okay. The normal brown uniform stays at the station. Right. Could you bring it home for a special occasion, Alex? Like a birthday or a fire? I may have been fired too. Oh.

Brilliant. See you later, guys. Anyway, my house is on fire, so I'm just going to borrow a uniform and put that out when I get home. All right, thanks, you cool. Thanks, you cool. Alex, are there some other photos

that hook people in on social media or dating apps? Somebody messaged in saying, I think, and it might be a controversial point, that the lower back tattoo on a female is the equivalent of sleeves on a male. Caitlin's face. Really? Really.

Okay. Is that one of those sarcasm ones? But is it because it's like the bad girl spot to get a tattoo? Is it because it's a bit bad girl? And you like the sleeves because it's like a bit of a bad boy but he can cover it

by putting on a long sleeve shirt. I don't know. But you still know they're under. Well that's their situation. That's their

situation. Yes. Someone said any photo that isn't a selfie. If you just scroll through and all the guys' photos on dating

on the dating app are all just selfies. Yeah. Why has he got no friends to take photos of him? Raises a good point. And what does he look like from more than two and a half foot away? Yeah, you've got to have variability. Get back to variability.

And somebody actually messaged in after our caller saying a good smile, saying that works on guys' profiles as well. It's nice to see guys smiling, not looking all surly and trying to be too tough. That's true. You want to know that they can smile. Okay. And someone who looks like they're silly and having fun. It's like you're dressed up as a clown.

No, but then people with clown phobias won't date you. Oh, right. Yeah, that's true. And don't forget, it came out last year, and that did bad things for the clown industry. Really killed the sexy clown industry, didn't it? It did, yeah. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's fact of the day, and this is yesterday's scraps, so I hope your kids are... Oh, fact about a tongue. Hungry. Boom, fact about a tongue. That is today's fact of the day. There are only two breeds of dogs whose tongues aren't pink. That one that's got a purple tongue? Yes.

Both tongues are purple tongues. There's a dog with... There are two dogs with purple tongues? Or like grey-purple, yeah. Yeah. A Chinese Chowpurple, yeah. Yeah. A Chinese Chow Chow. Which is super cute. That's what I was thinking of, a Chow Chow.

Is that like a Pomeranian? It's a big fluffy one. Yeah, they're big super fluffers. Oh, it's so cute. Big doggos. Also, I didn't know this. They think it may have been a dog. Yeah, a Chow chow bred with a

something bred with a tabetian mastiff. Now, tabetian mastiffs are beautiful dogs. My wife became obsessed with them

recently and found one for sale. She's like, well, you know, maybe we can start saving for it. And I was like,

that means it's expensive. Because if she thinks something you need to save for something, yeah, it's bigger than

the credit card limit. Otherwise, let's not save for it, let's pay it off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Sade Finances. Yeah. It's bigger than the credit card limit. Otherwise, let's not save for it. Let's pay it off. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Sade Finances. Yeah. Maybe we should start saving for one. $5,000. They are

huge. They are gorgeous. They are so gorgeous. Tabish and Mastiff. People will be stealing them. They look like beers. I know. Good luck stealing it. It's a beer. Where are you going to put that? Oh my God. Can you please get one of those. I know. Good luck stealing it. It's a bear. Where are you going to put that? Good Lord. Oh, my God.

Can you please get one of those? I know. I want to pat it. Because I want to make it gorgeous. And people are like, I think that was a breed of dog that was in a zoo and everyone thought it was a lion. Yeah. But that looks like it would eat your kids.

It does. It's so huge. No, apparently they're like super friendly. Monks. Apparently had a lot to do with Tabeshan masters. Oh, yeah. Okay. No, that one's like in full.

It does look like a lion. Yeah. Anyway, the Chinese Chow Chow and the's like in full. It does look like a lion, yeah. Anyway, the Chinese Chow Chow and the Shar Pei, which is the roly dog from the toilet roll commercial. Are the only two dogs without pink tongues that have got purpley, greyish-looking tongues. Okay, why? Can't tell you. You can't back up the fact.

It's just the way it is. Well, you know how they say most people in Asia would be able to link a line to Kevin Bacon. No, the guy that's got the Mongolian barbecue restaurants. Genghis Khan. Genghis Khan. Great. I mean, a great horrific warlord of the time.

But he was like, I'm settling down and I'm getting into restaurants. Very entrepreneurial man. Yeah, when it comes to Mongolian barbecue. So most people will be able to trace back some line to him. And they think it's just a mutation that happened in these dogs' ancient ancestor. And it just kind of like kicked in. Wow, okay. And so they join the ranks, including polar bear, giraffe, and some breeds of cattle.

They have a purple tongue. They have a purple tongue. They have a purple tongue. Some dogs have spotted tongues. Yeah. And this can be a range of a whole bunch of different breeds. But they're the only ones who have a full-blown purple tongue. And if it's not full-blown purple, then they've been interbred with other dogs.

Okay. That's one of the ways they tell of the pedigree test, apparently. So today's fact of the day is there is only two breeds of dog in the world with purple tongues. Fact of the day, day, day, day, day. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do- Now it's the South Island's turn to try to not eat Ben & Jerry's ice cream from a Ben & Jerry's ice cream shop. The Scoop store will be in Christchurch and then also in Queenstown. Completely unavoidable.

It really is. It's got you. It's good news. This is good news because it's delicious. I had a scoop. I had an ice cream from there a couple of weeks back. And I got two scoops, two different flavours. And the first one.

In the peak of winter. Oh, you threw ice cream at me at the time. Oh, I'm sorry, Dad. Are you kidding? No, but that was literally when it was cold snap and the heating was through the roof. Oh, yeah. You went for ice cream.

Oh, we were out. And I wanted an ice cream. Yep. There's nothing wrong with that. I went weird. Just wear your jacket. It's just weird. I don't know.

I went two scoops. One, the top one I was like God that's sweet. The next one better not be this sweet. It was sweeter. I was like

but I finished it anyway. Waste not want not and all that. Like want to do it but anyway Ben & Jerry's and all its delicious flavours cone options sauces. whatnot and all that. Like, I want to do it. But anyway, Ben & Jerry's and all its delicious flavours,

cone options, sauces, toppings, it's all coming. I don't know where in Queenstown it's going to be. Queenstown, I couldn't. Another reason I couldn't live in Queenstown, the first reason being I couldn't afford it. But, yeah, I wouldn't be able to. There's treats on every corner. And especially because when you can go into the Remarkable Fudge shop

and get sweet, get free samples. So it's got a special dedicated lolly shop. The Cookie Time shop's there. Yep, that's there. That's hard to say no to. Yeah. You've got Ferg Burger. You've got, like, at least three other really good burger places

that are trying to compete with Ferg Burger. And you've got Ferg Bakery. You've got the bakery next door. You've got multiple, like, amazing pizza places. Yep. All the vineyards. Yeah, you've got the vineyards for your drinking. All the restaurants.

I mean, there's seriously no shortage of the ability to have a good calorie intake in that region. No, there's not. And it gets really cold over winter, and all I ever feel like doing when it's cold is eating. Yeah. We need extra padding. It's a trap.

It is a trap. Queenstown's need extra padding. It's a trap. It is a trap. Queenstown's a big trap. It's a trap. But that part we love it. Or you go in there and your MyFitnessPal app sends you a little thing and it's just like,

get out, get out. If you go in here, I'm not going to be able to help you. Run while you still can because you literally soon may not be able to run because you're going to be

so full of Ben and Jerry's.